#and i cherished it very much and then it got fucking eaten by the dryer

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

trying to figure out if im cursed or if the third time's the charm

[naughty-teddy-innit]

Flutters: A losing your virginity to Ed Request {MATURE}

Title:      Flutters: A Losing Your Virginity Oneshot (REQUEST)

Author: @naughty-teddy-innit​

Rating:  NC-17/MATURE/NSFW (Fluffy AND Smutty!)

Authors Note: This was my first ever request, and I think, my favourite thing I’ve ever written. So many feels. Hope you guys like it. Xoxo.

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FLUTTERS

“Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up, it’s bobsled time!  COOL RUNNINGS!”

You cannot help but crack up at the childish enthusiasm that just spills out of your boyfriend every time his favourite movie comes on.  The way his clear blue eyes crinkle when he smiles and laughs, and the way that he knows EVERY word of this movie and quotes it verbatim? It’s endearing, really, never mind completely adorable.   He takes such pleasure in the simple things.  

It’s a dreary, cloudy day, pissing down freezing rain, and the two of you have decided that PJ’s, blankets, movies and your comfy overstuffed couch are your only goals for the day.  He’s sprawled back, laying kind of sideways against the cushions at one end of the couch, while you’re sprawled against a pillow at the other end, semi facing him, your legs battling for dominancy of the couch.  

You feel a toe poke you in the calf, and you look over to see one invisible eyebrow raised, staring at you with mock indignation. “You laughing at me, woman??” he says with a grin.  “A classic film such as this deserves reverence! Respect!”  

“The movie? Maybe. Your Jamaican accent?” You poke him back with determination.  “Not even!”

His mouth drops and he grabs his chest, feigning betray and horror.  “You cut DEEP! My accents are renowned, I’ll have you know!”  He moves suddenly, swooping over you and pinning you to the cushions with his body, and mercilessly digging his fingers into your ribs, tickling you until you beg for mercy. “EDWARD.  I swear to GOD, ED STOPPP!!”

You’ve got tears streaming down your cheeks as you shriek with laughter, and finally he lets up, pure satisfaction on his face as he lifts his hands in victory.  You take this handy opportunity to spring up and knock him backwards, straddling his hips and finding his sweet, soft belly in order to launch your own counterattack.  His eyes widen as he realizes your intent and his body twists sideways in order to evade your fingertips.  His unbridled, joyful giggles may be the best thing ever in all of life, as far as you’re concerned, you cannot get enough of them, and they are completely uncontrolled right now.  Your fingers find their target and he’s yelping, offering full surrender as your fingers find their target.  

By the end the both of you are gasping for breath, tears in your eyes from laughing.  He’s looking at you, that look that is so tender and so special, the one that’s reserved only for you.  You smile, almost shyly, and bite your lip.  His hand reaches for your face, cupping your chin, and as he pulls himself up to a semi-sitting position, he so softly brushes your lips with his. That familiar butterfly flutters in your belly, and your hands find his beard, fingers running through the soft copper scruff, pulling his face to yours, deepening the kiss. His tongue gently parts your lips, seeking to taste you, and his hand is gently running through your hair.  The pads of his thumb skates along the contour of your cheekbone, your jawline, your neck, tracing every inch of your face. Your hands find their way to his silky fiery-red hair, copper locks always in a disarray, and your fingers wind your way into it, loving the way he hums with contentment as your hands work their magic on his scalp.  

He moans as his mouth covers yours, deepening the kiss again, and suddenly, you can feel HIM, pressing against your thigh, as he holds you close.  You blush as he shifts, feeling it against you, and feeling you stutter, he pulls back just a bit.

You love Ed.  Intensely, deeply, and with no hesitation.  There were some things though that you hadn’t yet shared.  20 years old, you had grown up in loving, supportive household, but also a traditional one.  You had grown up with plenty of love and affection, in a very hands-on household, with very traditional values. Sex was not something you had ever taken lightly. Growing up, you were taught that sex was something to be valued and cherished, a gift to be given to the right man, in love and trust.  Not some token to be spent whenever with whoever. You had always taken that to heart, wanting to save such a special experience for the right person.  Up until your relationship with Ed, your love life had consisted of a string of cheaters and fuck boys, so there had never really been any temptation. Marriage-Only wasn’t necessarily something you were committed to, but being sure of the right person was.  

You and Ed had been together for just under 6 months, meeting at an industry event.  You worked as an event co-coordinator for a major company in your city, and your boss had introduced you that night.  You had been so charmed right off the bat, he was just as sweet, humble, kind and funny behind the scenes as his he was in front of the camera and on stage.  You’d talked for several hours that first weekend, and nothing had shocked you more when he continued to text you, and your relationship had bloomed.  The distance thing wasn’t always easy, but he made every second spent apart completely worth it.  Ed wasn’t one for grand, extravagant gestures, he tended to keep it simple, but so pure. So thoughtful.  Little things.  He knew exactly how you liked your coffee, and when you needed that pick-me-up the most, and would have it waiting for you without a word.  After a shit day, he knew your sweet tooth would make chocolate a MUST, and your favourite candy bar would be waiting for you in the fridge (Because Reese Peanut Butter Cups MUST be eaten cold) when you got home.  You were weirdly OCD about waking up to a clean kitchen, and he would, without a word, do the dishes and wipe the countertops after dinner while you dozed on the couch.  He knew the correct laundry detergent and which pants not to throw in the dryer, how to brush you hair after a shower, and that Jimmy Fallon or Ricky Gervais were the best way to make you laugh.   He knew which toilet paper to buy, the exact red wine that capped off your Friday evenings, and not to EVER play Justin Beiber in your house. He even put the seat down from DAY ONE. Until him you had no idea this kind of man even actually existed.    

He was kind and thoughtful and cuddly and sweet and funny and gentle and sexy…really you could go on and on.  He was a touch-feely kinda dude, loved to wrap himself around you from behind, play with your hair, and cuddle up for days.  You LOVED that, he had a way of making you feel so loved and important and valued. It wasn’t something you were really used to.  And making out with Ed?  It was delicious…his lips, they were so soft, so full, and the way they felt on your skin…The way he’d cup your face, the way his hands would leave trails of lightning over every bit of skin they touched.  It wasn’t as though he’d never touched you, his permanently calloused fingertips had the ability to light fires under your skin, and those moments when his hands were cupping and kneading your breasts, flicking your nipples, gently stroking your thighs or squeezing your ass cheeks…they’d almost swayed you a few times.  He knew your feelings concerning sex, and never once, in the entire time you two had known each other, had he EVER pushed you or your boundaries.  He knew without question that it was your decision, and that when the time was right, well…it’d be right.  You hadn’t gone far beyond making out, mainly because in your mind, it felt as though it wasn’t fair to Ed, and you knew it would likely sway you to other things.  You wanted to be sure before travelling down that path, and torturing the poor boy didn’t much seem very nice either.  It was pretty obvious a few times that he was decidedly less than comfortable when you’d pulled back before things went too far, but his only reaction ever was to breathe deep, adjust himself and pull you close for a cuddle.  Never once had he made you feel guilty about your choices, and to you, it made him perfect.

Pulling yourself out of your thoughts, you see his cheeks dimple as he pulls back, noticing your blush.  “I love that color in your cheeks, love…” he says with a grin. “Soz if he made you uncomfortable…I keep telling him to behave, doesn’t always work though.”  He sits you both up, tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses you gently, while attempting to rearrange himself into a less…confining…position.  

“Not trying to make “him” uncomfortable…” you laugh, still blushing. “It’s not like you don’t illicit the same reaction, sir.”

“You’re so beautiful”, he says softly, gazing at you with an intensity that takes your breath away. “And sexy. And you can cook. And you’re funny. And smart as shit. And you always SMELL amazing.” He pauses and scrunches his face up in that way that is so freaking adorable.  “How do women do that??”

Inwardly your insides are a melted, messy pool of feels, but you’ve never been one to gush or wear your heart on your sleeve.  “Multitasking is our “thing…” you drawl with a straight face. “Being that men can’t even pee and aim at the same time, we’ve got that particular area sewn up, I think.” You crack a grin and giggle at the truly affronted look on his face at the pee-and-aim statement and you drop a quick kiss on his nose before you scramble off him, knowing you might be in trouble for that one.

“I always put the seat down!” he says quite indignantly, chasing after you into the kitchen. “I’ve been trained well! It’s not our fault that the male anatomy acts like a fire hose sometimes…”

“EW.  That’s a lovely image, Teddy, thanks for that.” You’re cracking up at the imagery that description has put in your head, but you’re beginning to think he needs to NOT be using your bathroom any longer, if that’s what’s happening. Jeez.

He catches up to you and lifts you up on the counter, hands flat against the underside of your bum, and softly places butterfly kisses all the way up your jawline to your ear, where he stops and nibbles just for a moment.  Oh my…the tingles and flutters and lightning strikes taking over your body….it’s amazing what he makes you feel with the slightest touch.

He leaves a soft, slow, lingering kiss on your lips, and then pulls back, a content expression on his face, as takes a deep breath.  “The things you do to me, woman” he chuckles softly.  

“You’re not so bad yourself, Teddy…” you whisper, gently brushing the silky copper curls from his forehead.  Your foreheads touch, and he gently rubs his nose against yours, once, and then again.  

The first time he’d uttered the words “I love you” it had turned your world upside down, in the very BEST way.  He’d flown in to spend a night with you, a much needed visit, and being jetlagged and exhausted, he’d pretty much collapsed on you and your couch when he’d arrived.  Knowing all he’d have had to eat was airplane food, you’d made sure to have his very favourite pizza in the world waiting for him when he arrived, and after he’d fairly GORGED himself on the Calabrese deliciousness, he’d dragged you to the couch, and pulled you into the Little Spoon position and buried his face in your hair.  You pulled your favourite blanket over the both of you, so content to just be encircled in his arms, and just when you thought he was asleep, you heard soft words muttered in your ear.  “God, I love you…Never go away from me…”  Your stomach had dissolved into butterflies and you heart had nearly exploded.  It was the first time anyone had ever said those words without wanting something in return, the first time those words had ever meant anything to you.  By the time those words had registered, the boy had completely conked out, and didn’t hear you say them right back.  It was the first time that you’d ever believed in those words enough to use them, and there was no doubt how deeply you believed them. Since that night, those words had been uttered many times, but the habit you two had developed, the “thing” that said I love you without words, was the Eskimo kiss.  It was such a tender, gentle, loving gesture, and one that always spoke volumes when there were no words.  

He kisses your cheek, and turns around, stretching his arms out, and surveys the state of the kitchen. There are pizza boxes still stacked up the counter leftover from lunch, and your plates are in the sink.  You hop down from the counter and head for the sink while Ed grabs up the pizza boxes and takes them out to the trash.  Kitchen clean, you turn around and see your favourite Ginger pawing through your fridge.  

“Is there EVER a time you’re not hungry?” you ask him, laughing.  “Practically a whole pizza at lunch wasn’t enough?”

“I’m a growing boy!” he protests, “Without enough food, I’d waste away, innit??”

He slams the door of the fridge, and grabs his hoodie from the chair, sliding it over his head. “We need oreos, I reckon!” he says with authority.  “Double stuf, if possible.  Gonna run to the store, love, a snack run is in the offing!  Want anything?”

“All I need is right in front of me.”  You smile softly and drop a kiss on his forehead. “Go ahead, I’ll find us a movie for when you get back.”

His hand brushes my cheek, and I feel his nose brush mine.  “Dunno how I got so lucky…?” he mumbles, a content smile spreading across his face. You grin and push him towards the door, knowing the faster he goes, the faster he’ll be back.

Once the door shuts behind him, you let your fingers wander to your mouth, unconsciously tracing where his lips have left their mark. You loved him. So much.  And suddenly, as clear as day, you knew how you wanted to spend the rest of this dreary afternoon.  You’d never felt so loved before, so cherished.  The desire to share yourself, all of yourself, with this man you loved so deeply, had been building for some time, and you were ready. Scared slightly shitless, perhaps, but there was no one you wanted to share this experience with more.  

The thrill of anticipation zinged in your bloodstream, and you decided you had better do some inventory before Ed got back. Taking the stairs 2 at a time you ran upstairs, locking yourself in the bathroom.  Luckily, you’d thoroughly showered that morning, including all necessary manner of shaving and exfoliation.  You didn’t quite know what to do with yourself, the nerves you felt were literally causing your hands to shake.  You decided fresh breath was a priority, and scrubbed your teeth within an inch of your life, and then dug through the bathroom cabinet till you found your hairbrush, and pulling the elastic from your hair and releasing the topknot, you brushed your long hair till it fell in loose waves over your shoulders.  You pulled your ratty old PJ shirt over your head, and with a deep exhale, you examined yourself in the mirror.  You were certainly on the curvier side, you’d inherited your mama’s birthing hips, but you’d always kind of liked your hourglass figure.  There were actually times you’d thought to yourself that smaller tits would be a blessing, but oh well.  All in all, there were some areas of your body you wish were a little more toned, a little flatter, but Ed was always one to tell you how much he loved every inch of you, and loved the fact that you could EAT.  You knew he’d appreciate every inch of you no matter what.  The thought of that “appreciation” sent a shiver of anticipation and nerves up your spine, and with a little skip in your step you hurry off to the bedroom.

You’re now faced with figuring out what you should (or shouldn’t?) wear.  You try on a sexy lace bra and thong, but TOO sexy, too obvious.  Just take it all off and lay there??  No chance, you were WAY too nervous to put yourself out there like that.  Finally, you settle on a pair of teeny, turquoise soft boy shorts that showed off your legs (minus your panties), and a stretchy, sexy lace cami with spaghetti straps that showed off your cleavage and midriff.  You’re awkwardly trying to decide how to position yourself on the bed when something VITALLY important crosses your mind, and you hop back up.  You hadn’t exactly planned this in advance, and so you weren’t currently on the Pill or the shot, and there was NO chance this experience was happening without being safe.  Ed had always been honest about his history, he’s by no means a virgin, but no manwhore either.  He also had always been strict about being safe, and not taking risks, which was reassuring.  You notice his backpack in the corner of the room, and you figure it’s worth a quick check. SURE ENOUGH, in the bottom of the side pocket, there’s a packet of condoms. The Sheeran motto apparently was “Always Be Prepared”.  You shake your head, laughing nervously, and thank the Gods that that small box was unopened, or he’d have some QUESTIONS to answer.

You grab the box and toss them in your nightstand drawer, and as you begin to contemplate what to do with yourself next, you hear the door slam down downstairs. The sound of the door alone has your heartrate revving like an engine, and the hairs on your arm and neck prickle.  You KNOW you want this, you KNOW you’re ready…it’s expressing that to him.

“Love??” you hear that cheery, sexy, British accent echo from downstairs, and you quickly smooth your hair down one last time, and lay on the bed, tummy down, facing the door.  

“Upstairs, babe!” you call out, in a tone slightly higher than it probably should be.  Your heart is literally in your throat, and you’re not sure whether to giggle, or hyperventilate, or faint. Maybe all three?

You can hear him coming up the stairs, calling your name like a question, trying to figure out where you are.  “Just in the bedroom!” you call, crossing and uncrossing your legs, shifting your weight to and fro, and trying to figure out where to put your arm.  He pushes the door open and pops his head ‘round the doorjamb, and his face lights up when he sees you.

“…We playing hide ‘n’ seek this afternoon?” he asks with a twinkle in his eye. “Cuz that wasn’t much of a look? Try under the bed next time!”  He come fully into the room and sees you’re laying on the bed, and immediately kicks his sneakers off, and launches himself onto the bed next to you.  He buries his face against the soft curve of your lower back, and nuzzles at the soft skin there.  It feels as though he’s trying to breathe you in, and it’s intoxicating. You can’t help but let out a little sigh of pleasure at the touch of his scratchy cheeks against your skin.  

You slowly turn yourself over and gaze him, taking in his beautiful big blue eyes, his tangle of silky orange curls and the way his perfect lips are curved into that little boy smile.  It’s ridiculous how PRETTY he is, and you just can’t get enough.  You thread your fingers into his beard, and tug him towards you, kissing him softly; his top lip, his bottom lip, and both, trying to put everything you’re feeling into that kiss.

“Mmmmm” he hums contentedly.  “I love your lips. More please.” He pulls you in and presses his lips to yours once more, deepening the kiss, winding his hands into your hair to pull you as close to him as you can, tasting every bit of you. His lips linger, drawing his kisses out to the point where your breath is gone but you don’t care.  He tastes so good, those exquisitely soft, perfectly pink lips the perfect fit to yours, his hands so strong and gentle at the same time.

The length of his body is pressed up against yours, and wrapped up in the intensity of this kiss you’re pushing your body against his, twining your leg with his fuzzy one, and you can feel peaks of electricity in your blood, like your whole body is on edge.  It’s not long before you can feel his reaction, it’s hard against your thigh, and suddenly he’s breaking the kiss and taking a deep breath.  His cheeks are pink, and he speaks before you can utter a word.

“Damn, he’s at it again….Sorry, love, we men need an off-switch apparently.” He laughs nervously and pushes his hands through his hair.  “Did you pick a movie…?  We can-“. You take a deep breath and cut him off before he can get another word out.

“Teddy…” you whisper softly, “I don’t want to watch a movie.”  You brush your fingers through the long strands on his forehead, and gaze up at him, trying to convey your message without words.  You could literally lose yourself in those sea-blue eyes.  He raises an almost non-existent eyebrow and says “Whaddya want to do then? Kind of a crappy afternoon to go anywhere, innit…?”

You stop yourself from giggling, but only just. Why are boys so DENSE sometimes? You take another deep breath, lock eyes with him and cup his cheek.  You kiss him softly, and then trace his lips with your fingertips.  “No…I don’t want to go out either.  I want to stay right here.  With you.”  You take in every last molecule of oxygen you possibly can, steel yourself, and pull yourself to a halfway sitting position.  “I want YOU, Teddy.  All of you.” And you exhale, watching for his reaction, your lip between your teeth.

His eyes widen, suddenly realizing what you’re trying to tell him.  “Babe...I know I got a bit carried away just then, I don’t want you to feel like you have to do this.  I love you, and you have my word I’m not in a rush…”

He’s looking at you, such tenderness in his eyes, and an uncertainty that’s so endearing you find yourself falling all over again.  Your heart is simply racing, your blood pulsing through your body as you pull yourself upright and gaze into his eyes, wanting so badly to convey what you’d been dying to tell him.  Lacing your fingers with his, you press a soft kiss to his warm fingertips and press both of your intertwined hands to your chest, to your heart that was hammering at the expression on his face, and tried to put everything you were feeling into the shaky words that spilled from your lips.  You wanted, NEEDED, him to know just how much you wanted this with him.

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it, Teddy. I love you.  So much.  I always knew that the first time I had sex, I didn’t want it to be slam-bam high school thing. I didn’t want to “lose it” just to say I’d done it.  I wanted it to be with someone that wanted to actually make love to me, not just get laid.  I wanted to be sure I was in love and that he was in love with me.  And I am.  You know me better than anyone, and every little thing you do shows me how much you love me.  You’ve never once expected a thing in return, never pressured me, and that makes me want you. It makes me sure that you’re who I’ve been waiting for.”  You take a breath, feeling the warmth in your cheeks and look into his eyes, awaiting his response.

The look on his face…it was something you would tuck away and keep with you for as long as you lived.  There was such love and devotion in his eyes, and when he spoke, you could hear the emotion.  “You’ve no idea just how much I’ve fallen in love with you.  I never wanted to push you for anything, because the thought of pushing you away scares the shit out of me.  Just holding you, it makes me feel like I have the whole world, I don’t need anything else.”  He takes a shaky breath and continues. “I know how long you’ve waited for this…I mean…I- I just want you to be sure.”  He’s looking at you, biting his lip and playing with the edge of his hoodie.

You find that all of a sudden, your nerves have died down, and you know without a single doubt, that you’ve made the right decision.  You want this so badly, and more importantly, you want HIM.  You tip his chin up and catching his gaze, you touch your nose to his, once, and then again.  The biggest smile you’ve ever seen spreads across his whole face.

“We’ll take it slow, I promise…” he whispers, cupping your face.  “If you want me to stop, you’ve just got to say it.”  He gently lowers you back onto the bed, making sure you’ve got a pillow under your head, and slowly, oh so slowly, he lowers his head and begins to place the softest kisses all along your jawline, and your neck, and even your collarbone.  You let your eyes drift shut, enjoying the sensation of his lips and tongue worshipping you, leaving what feels like a trail of fire on every bit of skin he touches. He drops one last kiss at the tops of your breasts and looks up at you, wanting to make sure it was okay to move on. You’re not sure you can even speak coherently anymore, so you arch your chest up and breathe deeply, smiling at him and nodding.  He climbs over top of you, and you part your legs so he can settle in, wanting every part of him to be as close to you as possible.  He shakes his, almost imperceptibly, like he can’t believe this is happening, and lowers himself, supporting his weight with one arm, and he takes a moment just to look into your eyes and gaze at you.  

“I want to make you feel amazing…trust me?” he says softly, looking at you for permission.  

“Without a doubt.” You say softly.  You tangle your fingers in his hair and tilt your face to catch his lips, the need to feel them, to taste them, overwhelming you.  Your tongue gently parts his lips, sliding into his mouth, desperate to taste him.  His tongue tangles with yours, his breathing shallow, and it’s like he CANNOT get enough of you.  It is so sexy.  He breaks away from you, and biting his lip he smiles slow and sexy.  His fingers trail down your cheek, traces your jawline and run down your shoulder and neck.  One hand splays on your bared midriff, and the other catches the hem of your cami, slowly easing it up your body.  You bite your lip, knowing what he wants, and you arch your body so he can pull it off of you.  You lay back against the pillows, and notice that he’s just looking at you, drinking you in. He has the sweetest smile on his face, and when he notices you fidgeting, looking a bit…self-conscious, he shakes his head and tips your head up to meet his gaze.

“You’re so beautiful.  Every single inch of you.  I could just sit here and look at you for hours.  How did I get so goddamn lucky…”

You blush, and he kisses your cheek softly. He moves himself down the bed, and looks at you with a twinkle in his eye, a small grin playing at his features. He begins at your collarbones, and begins leaving a trail of soft, wet kisses, soft lips followed by his sexy tongue, from one side to the other, and then traces a path down between your breasts. He plumps one up with his hand, and your breath stutters as his lips find your nipple.  His tongue swirls around the sensitive bud, alternating between gentle tugs and flicks.  While his mouth lavishes one nipple, his other hand is gently squeezing and massaging your other breast.  The sensations coursing through your body have you practically panting, your body writhing as he teases you.  It’s as though there’s an electric wire straight from your breasts right to your groin, what he’s doing feels SO good and you want more, MORE.

“Ed…God…” you moan, arching your body, trying to press your body into him as much as you possibly can. He’s switching between your nipples; sucking, tugging, nibbling, and it’s driving you to madness.  “More?” he asks softly, looking up at you, wanting to be sure.

“Yes….please….” your body is moving of its own accord, needing…what you weren’t sure, but so much more.  He pulls away from your breasts, and begins kissing his way back down your overly sensitive body.  He leaves a trail of kisses under each breast, and slowly, tortuously, makes his way down to your belly button.  His tongue dips into it as his focus shifts downwards, and he leaves feather light kisses from one hip to the other, all the way across.  You know where he’s headed, and your brain can barely comprehend what’s about to happen.  His mouth had never travelled your body this way, and it was leaving points of fire under every bit of skin he touched.  His hand slides under your leg and bends it at the knee, pushing it back gently, and does the same to your other leg, just as softly.  You feel utterly exposed in this position, but you’re so worked up that the thought doesn’t last long.  He lets the pads of his fingers skate up and down your thighs, tracing the length of your calves, even caressing your feet.  “Okay?” he whispers looking at you, and all you can do is nod, your body urging him on.

His lips are on you, his mouth leaving trails down the inside of each thigh, kisses on the insides of your knees.  He switches to your feet, gently lifting them and kissing the arches of your feet and OH god who knew feet were sexy and when he’s finished there he begins kissing his way up your legs, slowly, up one side, then he switches to the other leg, loving every inch of that one, from top to bottom.  You can feel his warm breath on you as he settles himself between your parted legs, and he gently hooks his fingers inside the waistband of your teeny shorts, gently tugging them down your thighs.  You lift your bum so he can pull them off, and he gently tosses them off to the side.  He works his way back up the insides of your legs, leaving butterfly kisses in his wake, tingles and jolts of electricity with every touch.  You feel his teeth skimming the softest part of the inside of your thigh, kissing, nibbling, and tasting every bit of your skin.  He stops, and grasps your thighs gently, pushing them open a bit more so he can have complete access, and suddenly you feel his fingers trace your lips, pushing them open oh so gently.  He very gently kisses the creases where your legs met your centre, and with his tongue, gently paints a stripe from the base of your slit all the way to the top.  Your whole body lifts off the bed as you gasp from the lightning strikes penetrating your belly, you’ve never experienced this kind of sensation, it’s overwhelming and SO GOOD and why in the hell have you waited this long?  

“Feel good, babe?” he murmurs, his face buried in your slit. You manage to lift your head enough to see the look of rapture on his face as he’s tasting you.  “You taste so fucking sweet.  I’ve wanted to do this for so long…”  His tongue is alternating between long, torturous licks and gentle nibbles at your labia.  It’s a storm you can barely weather, but God it is SO GOOD and in between trying to remember to breath, you manage to tell him “MORE.  Oh my…Teddy, please….!” You’re losing control of your body and you’re writhing under his ministrations, just completely out of control.  

“Anything for you, love” he grins, and pushing your lips back, his tongue finds that sweet pink spot.  His tongue swirls around and around it, nudging that sweet little pink button, like a piece of delicious candy, and your hands find his hair, that silky soft tangle of fiery curls, and you thread your hands through it, pressing his face as tightly against you as you can, completely lost to the building sensations in your belly.  You can’t form coherent words, just gasps, moans, guttural sounds that you had no idea could come from you.  His arms, the bright colours of his ink so sexy against the bare expanse of your skin, wrap around your thighs, pressing them to the sides of his head. He’s pulling you closer to him so his face is all but engulfed, the deep, throaty sounds escaping from his throat as he devours you so indescribably sexy.  His tongue is thrashing your clit, back and forth, quick and light, over and over and over, and you can’t comprehend the delicious fiery tightening in your belly, it’s SO GOOD, it feels like climbing the highest mountain and you want so badly to jump off that edge, and like he’s reading your mind, suddenly he switches from flicking and thrashing to sucking that little pink bundle of nerves right into his mouth and your mouth is wide open, there’s no words, your whole body is lifted up and your muscles locked, it’s like thunder crashing and lightning striking and like NOTHING you have ever felt before, your body is trying to jump out of your skin and there’s spots in your vision that don’t make sense but OH PLEASE NEVER STOP and he keeps sucking and tugging, helping you ride out this incredible explosion, your hands still in hair, keeping him exactly where you need him to be. Your body is STRAIGHT up off that bed, arching into his mouth, “TEDDY…” you gasp, as you fly off that cliff, riding out the most intense sensations you have EVER experienced in your life.  Finally the sensations begins to ebb away, your body sags back against the bed and you look down at the face between your legs, with a sated, disbelieving smile on your face.

He kisses your thighs one last time, and lifts himself up.  He crawls up the bed and gently nestles himself on top of you, catching your lips in a kiss, and stroking your hair, your cheek.  “That was so fucking sexy…” he murmurs.  “Incredible watching you, listening to you come undone….was it what you hoped for?”  

You pick your head up off the pillow, and gaze at him, trying to figure out how to put what just happened into words.  “That was…Teddy…that was incredible.  It was…I don’t even.  Holy shit.”  Your head flops back on the pillow, and he cracks a little boy grin at your words and dips his face to catch your lips for a kiss.  

Your ability to breathe is only just returning to normal, and as you lay sprawled beneath him, all you can think is how you love him so much right at this moment.  You bite your lip, and look at him, knowing what you’d like to do next. You kiss him softly, once, twice and run your fingers down his cheek.  You pull yourself up to a sitting position, and looking him in the eye, you hook you fingers under the edge of his hoodie and begin to drag it up his body.  He grins, and lifts his arms to help you get it off.  His shirt follows, and you awkwardly fumble with his belt buckle, trying to undo it. You manage to unbuckle it, and carefully unbutton his jeans and pull the zipper down.  He’s watching you, letting you take the lead.  You pause, wondering how to go about getting his pants down without looking like you have NO idea what you’re doing.  You can see him smiling at you, laughter in his eyes, and he lifts his hips without a word, helping you to peel his jeans off his legs. Once those are out of the way, he pulls you back down on the bed, and finds your lips.  His lips, so soft, so full, they taste so good.  Long, lingering kisses, deep kisses that you could feel down to the tips of your toes.  Kisses full of promise and passion and tenderness.  

Your let your hand fall to his hip, your fingers playing with the edge of his boxer briefs.  His hands have found your ass, cupping and kneading, squeezing, as he continues to bruise your mouth with kisses, tasting you with his tongue.  Your legs are intertwined, and you’re beginning to feel his reaction against your hip.

Your fingers slide under the waistband of his boxers, wanting to explore what was waiting for you.  His hips stutter as he realizes what you’re doing, and he pulls back to look you in the eye.  “Only if you’re sure, Love”, he whispers.  

“Mmm, I’m sure…” you whisper, a smile tugging at your lips.  “Just…tell me if I’m doing it right?”

“Trust me Babe…there’s VERY little you could do wrong right about now” he chuckles.  

He shimmies his boxers down and you pull them off and WHOA.  Wow. Not like you didn’t know what a penis looked like…but, um. It was BIG.  How was that supposed to-?  Never mind. You’d get there.  Right now….you run your fingertips up his thigh, sifting the fuzzy hairs there between your fingers, enjoying the shiver you can feel run through his body.  You let your fingers walk to that soft crease where his thigh meets his groin, and then tentatively, you gently let your fingers wrap around his length, and give him one long stroke, letting your fist stop at the head.  Wow….so hot to the touch, but smooth.  Like silk.  A low throaty moan escapes Ed’s throat as his head falls back, enjoying the touch of your hand.  

You gently let your hand continue to glide along the length of his penis, from the base to the tip, and judging by the quick, raspy breaths falling from Ed’s mouth, you’re doing something right.  You LOVE the effect your touch is having on him, and on the next stroke, you gently tighten your fist, tugging the head and the hiss that escapes his lips is so satisfying.

“Jesus baby….” He just manages to get out. ”You’re gonna be my undoing….”

He slides his fingers into your hair, pulling you close so he can kiss you.  Not so tender this time, it’s fierce and passionate, the lust he’s feeling spilling out of him into you.  You’re moving your hand more quickly, and you can feel his length thickening and growing as you stroke him.  It’s a heady, powerful feeling that his body is reacting this way because of you. Between strokes and tugs, you gently cup his balls, and watch him carefully, afraid of squeezing too tight.  “Shit…babe…like that”, he hisses, and you happily pick up the pace, loving the sound of his voice, the way his eyes are squeezed shut, the way his leg is tensed as he braces his body.  His hips stutter, and your eyes widen as you notice a bead of fluid roll out of the slit in the tip of his penis, as you’re pumping and stroking.  You’re surprised at his how sexy, how pretty, it is. Framed by the same soft, orange strands that adorn the rest of his body, the plush, pink head, the silky soft shaft…it was incredible.  You loved how rock hard he was, that you were the one that make it that way.  The foreskin was stretched back now, and the breathy sounds coming from his lips are coming fast and you can tell he’s fast losing control.  He sucks in a breath and his hand is suddenly on yours, clumsily pulling it away.

“Fucking hell… feels so good,” he gasps, “but…stop. …I don’t want to finish like this, not like this.”  His mouth is yours, his tongue is tasting every bit of you, and his body flush with yours.  He cups your cheek, and staring at you tenderly.  He tilts your face up, and touches his nose to yours.  “…Love you so much, baby.  I want you so damn bad…”  He whispers this, but there is so much intensity to his words, such reverence. It takes your breath away.  You push yourself back against the pillows, and wrap your fingers into the sweaty curls at the base of his neck, pulling him close.  You press your lips to his and lift your hips to his.  “I want you too, Teddy, make love to me.”  You take a deep breath, ready to take the plunge (in more ways than one…) when through the emotions and lust you remember something important.  

You twist your body and your hand finds the knob on the drawer beside your bed, and you fumble in the drawer, your fingers finding the box.  Ed cranes his head, looking at what you’re doing, and then smiles knowingly.  “How’d I never notice you having rubbers in there before??” he says with a teasing grin.

“Because I didn’t!” you look at him with a raised eyebrow and a teasing grin, and then purposefully turn your head and motion to his backpack.  His eyes widen, and his cheeks turn the most ADORABLE shade of pink.  “Um…” he stutters with an adorable innocent boy smile on his face, “Always be prepared??”

“I love that you cared enough to want to be safe, to protect me”, you say, softly kissing his lips.  “That and the fact that you left them in there.” you giggle softly.

“I just figured…I mean, I didn’t want you think I was trying to-“.  You cut him off.  “Teddy…Shut up.  No more words, I’m not upset.  I love you and I want you.  Now.  Please, Teddy…”  You slide your fingers into his beard and tug him close, looking him straight in the eyes. He swallows hard, his breathing suddenly quicker.  “I want you too” he whispers and gently pulls the box from your hand.  He fishes out a foil packet, and as you watch with wide eyes, he quickly tears it open and looks at you, his eyes hooded.  He quickly slides the condom down over his length, and then you feel his soft hand slide under your ass cheek and he tugs you down.  You swallow deeply, your blood tingling and coursing through every part of your body. You shakily exhale; trying to remember to breathe, and let your legs fall open, your heart hammering in your chest. Ed lifts himself up, and crawls up over your body, moving slowly and gazing at you with such love and softness.

“Babe…look at me.”  He can obviously sense your nerves, and he brushes his fingers down your cheek, under your chin and drops a kiss between your breasts.  “I wouldn’t ever hurt you, we’ll take it slow. Promise…”  

He gently grasps your calf and pushes your leg back just a bit, and his lips are on you, lingering and tender and sweet, tugging your upper lip, then your bottom lip, deepening the kiss as he covers his body with yours.  Your leg is hiked up, pinned to his waist, and he’s leaning on his forearm, nestled between your legs.  He carefully lifts himself just a bit, and takes himself in hand, guiding his penis gently to your slit, and allows the head to just slip between your folds.  He makes no move to penetrate, not yet, but just gently slides the head of his dick against your cleft, allowing you to adjust to the sensation, up and down between your lips, allowing the moisture that’s gathered there to lubricate his length so that it glides like silk.  Your eyes close tight and your head falls back, GOD, he’s not in you yet but it feels SO good, so intimate, the anticipation is almost too much.  It feels like your blood is going pulse right out of your body.  

A low moan rumbles from his throat and he lets out a deep breath as feels you begin to surround him.  “You’re so wet, babe….It’s so hot.  You’re so sexy….” He groans as you tilt your hips up, wanting more.

He stops the gliding motion, and gazing into your eyes, he gently pulls your other leg up so their pinned to either side of his waist, and then reaching down between the two of you, he positions himself at your entrance.  He cups your face, and with so much tenderness it nearly undoes you, he touches his nose to yours.

Your heart is so full, you love him SO much, and you want nothing more than to stay with him like this forever.  You gasp as you feel the tip of him gently push against your opening, past your sensitive tissues, and your body jerks as you tense up. He gently strokes your hip and you hear him breathe the words “Relax, Love…I’ve got you”, as he kisses your lips. He only pushes himself in a bit, just the head, slowly, letting you adjust to his size. “…Tell me when…” he whispers, letting his fingers run up your thighs, leaving fiery trails behind them. You respond by tightening your legs around him, and squeezing his bum to press him closer.  He pulls his hips, back and in one slow motion, very gently, he fills you.  

You bite down hard, gasping, oh GOD, you knew it would hurt a bit, but it STINGS. Fuck.  Tears prick at your eyes as your sensitive flesh stretches in a way it hasn’t ever before.  His voice, it’s in your ear again, soft and reassuring. “I love you so much….I promise it will feel so much better. I won’t move till you tell me to.”  His thumbs tenderly wipe away the moisture under your eyes, and he slows his body, and strokes your face.  He stays buried inside you, and concentrates on kissing you until you’ve no breath left in you, and slowly you realize your body is adjusting to his size.  The sting is dying out, but the feeling of being stretched that way, it’s something you must get used to.  He’s not moved, just holding you, caressing you, loving you, and remaining deep inside you while your body adjusts to him.

“Baby…” he half moans, “Let me try-“.  You kiss him and urge him on with your hips, and he slowly lifts his hips and slowly pulls himself part way out, not all the way, and nudges his head through your slick folds, bumping up against your clit, and slowly thrusts back into you, gently, unhurriedly.  Oh, oh not so painful anymore, it…there’s still quite the sting as you stretch to fit him, but it’s wonderful, the feeling of him filling you up, actually being INSIDE you…The thought pops through that it’s happening, you’re actually having SEX. You push aside the urge to giggle and the thought is extinguished as both his hands find your ass, and he pulls his hips back, pulling almost all the way out but not quite and oh, it’s a surprisingly empty feeling, you want him back and your hands run down the length of his back to the rise of his ass and tug him, beckoning him to keep going, heavy breaths, loud breaths, falling from your lips, and he groans at your reaction, setting a slow, languorous pace, your ass in his hands and he continues to thrust in to you, long, gentle strokes, filling you up.  You can feel your walls tightening around him every time he enters you, wanting to keep him inside you.  “You’re so goddamn tight….Jesus!” he grunts as you envelop him at every stroke. “You feel so fucking amazing….you alright baby??” he whispers in your ear.

You manage an “Oh…oh… yes….” And you tighten your legs around him, pressing your feet into his back, urging him on.  One hand slides out from under your ass, and he moves it up to your hair, his fingers tangling in the long strands falling over your shoulders.  His lips are on your neck, leaving a wet trail from your pulse point down to your shoulder and across your collarbones.  His breathing is heavy, uneven, and the hand that’s tangled in your hair and cupping your face is pinning you to the pillows, and his mouth frantically finds yours, kissing you deeply, his tongue everywhere, and not once do his hips stop moving, his body is lifting and pressing into you, over and over and it feel SO good, the feeling of him filling you up, every bit of his soft, warm body pressed against yours.

“More Babe…I need…ohh…” you gasp, trying to find the words but failing.  

“Oh, love….Yes…Fucking hell!” he grunts, lifting himself up off of you a bit, supporting himself with his hands and forearms, switching his strokes from long, languid thrusts where he’s not even pulling all the way out of you, to quicker, rhythmic, more frenetic thrusts, the head almost all the way out before he plunges back in, and you let one leg drop, using your foot to brace yourself against the mattress, allowing yourself to open to him as much as possible.  You’re concentrating on the connection between you, the way your bodies fit together so perfectly, the zings and flutters and sparks that his every movement sends pulsing through your body.  The way he’s still cupping your face, caressing your neck, your shoulder, the rise of your breasts, how he can’t help but be drawn back to your lips, his kisses are so full of desire and lust, yet so tender.  Like a promise with every touch.  It’s so damn intimate. In this moment, with your heart and your body so incredibly full, you know that THIS is why you waited.  

He’s gasping with every movement, every thrust, and he’s trying to keep his eyes open, watching you and wanting to take you in, and holy GOD, the desire and drive in his eyes, how his pupils are blown and the way his mouth is dropping open with every sweet stroke, like he can’t control the sensations, it is sexy beyond words.  Your hands find their way to the back of his head, tangling in those delicious sweaty curls at the back of his neck, kissing him so deeply you could just about devour him.  

“Babe…so close…” he hisses, gritting his teeth and you realize he’s holding back and waiting for you, not wanting to put his needs ahead of yours. You let a hand drift down to rise of his ass cheek, and let the other hand find his jaw, and kiss him deeply, gasping for breath as the sensations race through your body.  You realize that all you want is for him to find that peak, to find his release, because the earth shattering climax he gave you with his tongue, that beautiful mouth, it was enough.  The feeling of him being inside you, being a part of you, him worshipping you like this? It was enough.  You had all the time in the world to explore each other from now on, and right now, this moment was all about him.  

His hips are moving in short, messy thrusts as he chases the sensations that are taking him over.  “Baby it’s okay…” you whisper, staring into his eyes and wanting him to feel as good as he made you feel.  “Let go!” you gasp, as little explosions of pleasure ricochet through your body, it’s insane how amazing he feels, and you pick your hips up and try to match his thrusts, pushing your pelvis against him, grinding against him, wanting every bit of contact you can get.  The hand that’s tangled in your hair tightens, his thumb brushing your ear, and he’s got his forehead pressed to yours as he tries to maintain eye contact. You can feel a bead of sweat roll off his temple, and the sounds escaping his mouth are now completely out of his control.  Low, throaty moans, guttural noises that you had no idea he was capable of, and you want this.  Oh you want this. You hold his face between your hands, and look him in the eyes, a feat, because he can barely keep them open, and kiss him so softly, so tenderly. “I love you….God, I love you.” You whisper to him, caught up in overwhelming emotion.  

His eyes are fluttering, and his whole body tenses up, his muscles caging you onto the bed.  “Ah ah ah…!” He’s making a concerted effort to lock eyes with you, to keep connected, but that battle is lost as they slam shut, his orgasm taking him over. “Jesus, baby I…Ah…Oh Fuck!” and his whole body shudders as his hips finds you one last time, and he’s pushing your body up the bed, bracing himself against you, trying to keep every last inch of you wrapped around him.  His muscles are tensed and shaking, and you can feel him shudder once more, and then his whole body sags, soft against you, and his head falls to your chest.  

You’re still struggling to catch your breath, your heart slamming against your rib cage, and the emotion coursing through you is threatening to overflow.  Ed, still panting himself, gingerly lifts himself off you, reaches down and hooks his finger into the condom as he gently pulls out of you, assuring it won’t slip off. “Oh…” you breathe, feeling the emptiness.  He slides it off quickly, and discreetly tucks it into a Kleenex he grabs from your nightstand and puts it off to the side. He rolls back over on to his side, facing you, and he can’t hide the smile spreading across his face as he cups your cheek and kisses you, over and over and over, with such fervor it almost renders you breathless.  He breaks away and a soft smile plays across his features as he just gazes at you, not saying word, just seemingly savouring the moment.  He pulls you into his chest, and you savour his warmth, wanting nothing more than to be held.

“Ed…” you falter, trying to figure how to put what you’re feeling into words.  “Every time I thought about what this experience would be like….when I thought about what I wanted it to mean?  Teddy, this was it.  I-“. He puts his finger to your lips.

“I love you.” The way he says this, it’s so quiet, but so full of conviction.  “You are everything to me…and it means the world to me that somehow I’m deserving enough that you chose to share yourself with me.  That was…fucking incredible.  YOU are fucking incredible.”

You smile softly, and run your fingers lazily through his beard.  You stretch your arms above your head, and then your legs, and as you go to cuddle your body into his chest, you suddenly feel…something…on the sheets between your legs.  You glance down, and oh. Oh God.  You knew it would hurt, when he entered you, but you didn’t think about the possibility of THIS.  Your face feels a thousand shades of pink, though you know there’s no real reason to feel embarrassed.  It’s just some blood, but still…Ed notices your discomfort, the blush on your cheeks, and he looks where you’re looking.  

“Love, it’s no big deal…honestly.  Happens sometimes.  I’m not bothered!”  He brushes the hair from your eyes and kisses your cheek, a reassuring smile on his face. You swing your legs over the side of the bed, and drop a kiss on his nose before pulling your cami back over your head.  You’re suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious.

“Gonna run to the bathroom, baby, clean myself up a bit…” you smile awkwardly.

“Course, Love.  Hurry back though….need cuddles from my girl after all that…” he murmurs with a crooked smile.  You hurry off to the bathroom, clean yourself up, pee because that seems like a good idea, and run a brush through your hair.  You stop for a second, and look at yourself in the mirror, studying your features. You feel different….empowered and well, like a real grownup.  You lift your shoulders and feel a grin spread across your face. You finally did it. No longer a virgin!  You giggle, flip your hair back and head back to the bedroom.  You walk through the door and stop short, staring at your bed.  Sweet boy, in the 5 minutes you’ve been in the bathroom, he’s pulled the bloody sheet off your bed, and put fresh linens back on.  He really does think of everything. A disbelieving smile crosses your face, and you shake your head slightly, so enamoured with this boy. You feel a strong of pair of arms wrap around you from behind, and you let out a soft sigh of contentment as you let your head fall back onto his chest.  Your fingers absent-mindedly begin tracing the colorful shapes on his forearms, and you feel his lips in your hair.

“Best day ever, innit?” he says softly. “Best girl ever too…”

You spin around and look him in the eyes, tracing his cheeks and jaw with your fingers, pushing a few stray fiery strands of hair from his forehead.  “You’re not so bad yourself, baby…” you whisper with a smile.

“Mmmmmmm” he hums contentedly, and softly, slowly, he leans in.  He touches his forehead to yours, and you feel his fingers tip your chin up, and just when you thought your heart couldn’t take anymore, he touches his nose to yours.

Hope you loved it, Feedback/Comments are LOVE!

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FLUTTERS:  A Mature Ed Sheeran Fanfic Request *REPOST*

Authors Note: I’ve been debating whether or not to repost my Ed Fics for all the new followers I’ve/we’ve been lucky enough to accumulate, so, HERE WE GO!  I’ve been in a bit of a writing funk, so hopefully getting my stories back out there will help jumpstart the creative juices!  I’ll post over the next few nights, so as not to inundate anyone’s timeline!  This one is probably the one I love the most! <3  Any and all feedback/reblogs/etc would be amazing!  Love you guys! 

FLUTTERS:  NC-17 for SexyTimes 

“Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up, it’s bobsled time!  COOL RUNNINGS!”

You cannot help but crack up at the childish enthusiasm that just spills out of your boyfriend every time his favourite movie comes on.  The way his clear blue eyes crinkle when he smiles and laughs, and the way that he knows EVERY word of this movie and quotes it verbatim, it’s endearing, really, never mind completely adorable.   He takes such pleasure in the simple things.  

It’s a dreary, cloudy day, pissing down freezing rain, and the two of you have decided that PJ’s, blankets, movies and your comfy overstuffed couch are your only goals for the day.  He’s sprawled back, laying kind of sideways against the cushions at one end of the couch, while you’re sprawled against a pillow at the other end, semi facing him, your legs battling for dominancy of the couch.  

You feel a toe poke you in the calf, and you look over to see one invisible eyebrow raised, staring at you with mock indignation. “You laughing at me, woman??” he says with a grin.  “A classic film such as this deserves reverence! Respect!”  

“The movie? Maybe. Your Jamaican accent?” You poke him back with determination.  “Not even!”

His mouth drops and he grabs his chest, feigning betray and horror.  “You cut DEEP, love! My accents are renowned, I’ll have you know!”  He moves suddenly, swooping over you and pinning you to the cushions with his body, and mercilessly digging his fingers into your ribs, tickling you until you beg for mercy. “EDWARD.  I swear to GOD, ED STOPPP!!”

You’ve got tears streaming down your cheeks as you shriek with laughter, and finally he lets up, pure satisfaction on his face as he lifts his hands in victory.  You take this handy opportunity to spring up and knock him backwards, straddling his hips and finding his sweet, soft belly in order to launch your own counterattack.  His eyes widen as he realizes your intent and his body twists sideways in order to evade your fingertips.  His unbridled, joyful giggles may be the best thing ever in all of life, as far as you’re concerned, you cannot get enough of them, and they are completely uncontrolled right now.  Your fingers find their target and he’s yelping, offering full surrender as your fingers find their target.  

By the end the both of you are gasping for breath, tears in your eyes from laughing.  He’s looking at you, that look that is so tender and so special, the one that’s reserved only for you.  You smile, almost shyly, and bite your lip.  His hand reaches for your face, cupping your chin, and as he pulls himself up to a semi-sitting position, he so softly brushes your lips with his. That familiar butterfly flutters in your belly, and your hands find his beard, fingers running through the soft copper scruff, pulling his face to yours, deepening the kiss. His tongue gently parts your lips, seeking to taste you, and his hand is gently running through your hair.  The pads of his thumb skates along the contour of your cheekbone, your jawline, your neck, tracing every inch of your face. Your hands find their way to his silky fiery-red hair, copper locks always in a disarray, and your fingers wind your way into it, loving the way he hums with contentment as your hands work their magic on his scalp.  

He moans as his mouth covers yours, deepening the kiss again, and suddenly, you can feel HIM, pressing against your thigh, as he holds you close.  You blush as he shifts, feeling it against you, and feeling you stutter, he pulls back just a bit.

You love Ed.  Intensely, deeply, and with no hesitation.  There were some things though that you hadn’t yet shared.  20 years old, you had grown up in loving, supportive household, but also a traditional one.  You had grown up with plenty of love and affection, in a very hands-on household, with very traditional values.  Sex was not something you had ever taken lightly. Growing up, you were taught that sex was something to be valued and cherished, a gift to be given to the right man, in love and trust.  Not some token to be spent whenever with whoever.  You had always taken that to heart, wanting to save such a special experience for the right person.  Up until your relationship with Ed, your love life had consisted of a string of cheaters and fuck boys, so there had never really been any temptation. Marriage-Only wasn’t necessarily something you were committed to, but being sure of the right person was.  

You and Ed had been together for just under a year, meeting at an industry event.  You worked as an event co-ordinator for a major company in your city, and your boss had introduced you that night.  You had been so charmed right off the bat, he was just as sweet, humble, kind and funny behind the scenes as his he was in front of the camera and on stage.  You’d talked for several hours that first weekend, and nothing had shocked you more when he continued to text you, and your relationship had bloomed.  The distance thing wasn’t always easy, but he made every second spent apart completely worth it.  Ed wasn’t one for grand, extravagant gestures, he tended to keep it simple, but so pure. So thoughtful.  Little things.  He knew exactly how you liked your coffee, and when you needed that pick-me-up the most, and would have it waiting for you without a word.  After a shit day, he knew your sweet tooth would make chocolate a MUST, and your favourite candy bar would be waiting for you in the fridge (Because Reese Peanut Butter Cups MUST be eaten cold) when you got home.  You were weirdly OCD about waking up to a clean kitchen, and he would, without a word, do the dishes and wipe the countertops after dinner while you dozed on the couch.  He knew the correct laundry detergent and which pants not to throw in the dryer, how to brush you hair after a shower, and that Jimmy Fallon or Ricky Gervais were the best way to make you laugh.   He knew which toilet paper to buy, the exact red wine that capped off your Friday evenings, and not to EVER play Justin Beiber in your house. He even put the seat down from DAY ONE. Until him you had no idea this kind of man even actually existed.    

He was kind and thoughtful and cuddly and sweet and funny and gentle and sexy…really you could go on and on.  He was a touch-feely kinda dude, loved to wrap himself around you from behind, play with your hair, and cuddle up for days.  You LOVED that, he had a way of making you feel so loved and important and valued. It wasn’t something you were really used to.  And making out with Ed?  It was delicious…his lips, they were so soft, so full, and the way they felt on your skin…The way he’d cup your face, the way his hands would leave trails of lightning over every bit of skin they touched.  It wasn’t as though he’d never touched you, his permanently calloused fingertips had the ability to light fires under your skin, and those moments when his hands were cupping and kneading your breasts, flicking your nipples, gently stroking your thighs or squeezing your ass cheeks…they’d almost swayed you a few times.  He knew your feelings concerning sex, and never once, in the entire time you two had known each other, had he EVER pushed you or your boundaries.  He knew without question that it was your decision, and that when the time was right, well…it’d be right.  You hadn’t gone far beyond making out, mainly because in your mind, it felt as though it wasn’t fair to Ed, and you knew it would likely sway you to other things.  You wanted to be sure before travelling down that path, and torturing the poor boy didn’t much seem very nice either.  It was pretty obvious a few times that he was decidedly less than comfortable when you’d pulled back before things went too far, but his only reaction ever was to breathe deep, adjust himself and pull you close for a cuddle.  Never once had he made you feel guilty about your choices, and to you, it made him perfect.

Pulling yourself out of your thoughts, you see his cheeks dimple as he pulls back, noticing your blush.  “I love that color in your cheeks, love…” he says with a grin. “Soz if he made you uncomfortable…I keep telling him to behave, doesn’t always work though.”  He sits you both up, tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses you gently, while attempting to rearrange himself into a less…confining…position.  

“Not trying to make “him” uncomfortable…” you laugh, still blushing. “It’s not like you don’t illicit the same reaction, sir.”

“You’re so beautiful”, he says softly, gazing at you with an intensity that takes your breath away. “And sexy. And you can cook. And you’re funny. And smart as shit. And you always SMELL amazing.” He pauses and scrunches his face up in that way that is so freaking adorable.  “How do women do that??”

Inwardly your insides are a melted, messy pool of feels, but you’ve never been one to gush or wear your heart on your sleeve.  “Multitasking is our “thing…” you drawl with a straight face. “Being that men can’t even pee and aim at the same time, we’ve got that particular area sewn up, I think.” You crack a grin and giggle at the truly affronted look on his face at the pee-and-aim statement and you drop a quick kiss on his nose before you scramble off him, knowing you might be in trouble for that one.

“I always put the seat down!” he says quite indignantly, chasing after you into the kitchen. “I’ve been trained well! It’s not our fault that the male anatomy acts like a fire hose sometimes…”

“EW.  That’s a lovely image, Teddy, thanks for that.” You’re cracking up at the imagery that description has put in your head, but you’re beginning to think he needs to NOT be using your bathroom any longer, if that’s what’s happening. Jeez.

He catches up to you and lifts you up on the counter, hands flat against the underside of your bum, and softly places butterfly kisses all the way up your jawline to your ear, where he stops and nibbles just for a moment.  Oh my…the tingles and flutters and lightning strikes taking over your body….it’s amazing what he makes you feel with the slightest touch.

He leaves a soft, slow, lingering kiss on your lips, and then pulls back, a content expression on his face, as takes a deep breath.  “The things you do to me, woman” he chuckles softly.  

“You’re not so bad yourself, Teddy…” you whisper, gently brushing the silky copper curls from his forehead.  Your foreheads touch, and he gently rubs his nose against yours, once, and then again.  

The first time he’d uttered the words “I love you” it had turned your world upside down, in the very BEST way.  He’d flown in to spend a night with you, a much needed visit, and being jetlagged and exhausted, he’d pretty much collapsed on you and your couch when he’d arrived.  Knowing all he’d have had to eat was airplane food, you’d made sure to have his very favourite pizza in the world waiting for him when he arrived, and after he’d fairly GORGED himself on the Calabrese deliciousness, he’d dragged you to the couch, and pulled you into the Little Spoon position and buried his face in your hair.  You pulled your favourite blanket over the both of you, so content to just be encircled in his arms, and just when you thought he was asleep, you heard soft words muttered in your ear.  “God, I love you…Never go away from me…”  Your stomach had dissolved into butterflies and you heart had nearly exploded.  It was the first time anyone had ever said those words without wanting something in return, the first time those words had ever meant anything to you.  By the time those words had registered, the boy had completely conked out, and didn’t hear you say them right back.  It was the first time that you’d ever believed in those words enough to use them, and there was no doubt how deeply you believed them. Since that night, those words had been uttered many times, but the habit you two had developed, the “thing” that said I love you without words, was the Eskimo kiss.  It was such a tender, gentle, loving gesture, and one that always spoke volumes when there were no words.  

He kisses your cheek, and turns around, stretching his arms out, and surveys the state of the kitchen. There are pizza boxes still stacked up the counter leftover from lunch, and your plates are in the sink.  You hop down from the counter and head for the sink while Ed grabs up the pizza boxes and takes them out to the trash.  Kitchen clean, you turn around and see your favourite Ginger pawing through your fridge.  

“Is there EVER a time you’re not hungry?” you ask him, laughing.  “Practically a whole pizza at lunch wasn’t enough?”

“I’m a growing boy!” he protests, “Without enough food, I’d waste away, innit??”

He slams the door of the fridge, and grabs his hoodie from the chair, sliding it over his head. “We need oreos, I reckon!” he says with authority.  “Double stuf, if possible.  Gonna run to the store, love, a snack run is in the offing!  Want anything?”

“All I need is right in front of me.”  You smile softly and drop a kiss on his forehead. “Go ahead, I’ll find us a movie for when you get back.”

His hand brushes my cheek, and I feel his nose brush mine.  “Dunno how I got so lucky…?” he mumbles, a content smile spreading across his face. You grin and push him towards the door, knowing the faster he goes, the faster he’ll be back.

Once the door shuts behind him, you let your fingers wander to your mouth, unconsciously tracing where his lips have left their mark. You loved him. So much.  And suddenly, as clear as day, you knew how you wanted to spend the rest of this dreary afternoon.  You’d never felt so loved before, so cherished.  The desire to share yourself, all of yourself, with this man you loved so deeply, had been building for some time, and you were ready. Scared slightly shitless, perhaps, but there was no one you wanted to share this experience with more.  

The thrill of anticipation zinged in your bloodstream, and you decided you had better do some inventory before Ed got back. Taking the stairs 2 at a time you ran upstairs, locking yourself in the bathroom.  Luckily, you’d thoroughly showered that morning, including all necessary manner of shaving and exfoliation.  You didn’t quite know what to do with yourself, the nerves you felt were literally causing your hands to shake.  You decided fresh breath was a priority, and scrubbed your teeth within an inch of your life, and then dug through the bathroom cabinet till you found your hairbrush, and pulling the elastic from your hair and releasing the topknot, you brushed your long hair till it fell in loose waves over your shoulders.  You pulled your ratty old PJ shirt over your head, and with a deep exhale, you examined yourself in the mirror.  You were certainly on the curvier side, you’d inherited your mama’s birthing hips, but you’d always kind of liked your hourglass figure.  There were actually times you’d thought to yourself that smaller tits would be a blessing, but oh well.  All in all, there were some areas of your body you wish were a little more toned, a little flatter, but Ed was always one to tell you how much he loved every inch of you, and loved the fact that you could EAT.  You knew he’d appreciate every inch of you no matter what.  The thought of that “appreciation” sent a shiver of anticipation and nerves up your spine, and with a little skip in your step you hurry off to the bedroom.

You’re now faced with figuring out what you should (or shouldn’t?) wear.  You try on a sexy lace bra and thong, but TOO sexy, too obvious.  Just take it all off and lay there??  No chance, you were WAY too nervous to put yourself out there like that.  Finally, you settle on a pair of teeny, turquoise soft boy shorts that showed off your legs (minus your panties), and a stretchy, sexy lace cami with spaghetti straps that showed off your cleavage and midriff.  You’re awkwardly trying to decide how to position yourself on the bed when something VITALLY important crosses your mind, and you hop back up.  You hadn’t exactly planned this in advance, and so you weren’t currently on the Pill or the shot, and there was NO chance this experience was happening without being safe.  Ed had always been honest about his history, he’s by no means a virgin, but no manwhore either.  He also had always been strict about being safe, and not taking risks, which was reassuring.  You notice his backpack in the corner of the room, and you figure it’s worth a quick check. SURE ENOUGH, in the bottom of the side pocket, there’s a packet of condoms. The Sheeran motto apparently was “Always Be Prepared”.  You shake your head, laughing nervously, and thank the Gods that that small box was unopened, or he’d have some QUESTIONS to answer.

You grab the box and toss them in your nightstand drawer, and as you begin to contemplate what to do with yourself next, you hear the door slam down downstairs. The sound of the door alone has your heartrate revving like an engine, and the hairs on your arm and neck prickle.  You KNOW you want this, you KNOW you’re ready…it’s expressing that to him.

“Love??” you hear that cheery, sexy, British accent echo from downstairs, and you quickly smooth your hair down one last time, and lay on the bed, tummy down, facing the door.  

“Upstairs, babe!” you call out, in a tone slightly higher than it probably should be.  Your heart is literally in your throat, and you’re not sure whether to giggle, or hyperventilate, or faint. Maybe all three?

You can hear him coming up the stairs, calling your name like a question, trying to figure out where you are.  “Just in the bedroom!” you call, crossing and uncrossing your legs, shifting your weight to and fro, and trying to figure out where to put your arm.  He pushes the door open and pops his head ‘round the doorjamb, and his face lights up when he sees you.

“…We playing hide ‘n’ seek this afternoon?” he asks with a twinkle in his eye. “Cuz that wasn’t much of a look? Try under the bed next time!”  He come fully into the room and sees you’re laying on the bed, and immediately kicks his sneakers off, and launches himself onto the bed next to you.  He buries his face against the soft curve of your lower back, and nuzzles at the soft skin there.  It feels as though he’s trying to breathe you in, and it’s intoxicating. You can’t help but let out a little sigh of pleasure at the touch of his scratchy cheeks against your skin.  

You slowly turn yourself over and gaze him, taking in his beautiful big blue eyes, his tangle of silky orange curls and the way his perfect lips are curved into that little boy smile.  It’s ridiculous how PRETTY he is, and you just can’t get enough.  You thread your fingers into his beard, and tug him towards you, kissing him softly; his top lip, his bottom lip, and both, trying to put everything you’re feeling into that kiss.

“Mmmmm” he hums contentedly.  “I love your lips. More please.” He pulls you in and presses his lips to yours once more, deepening the kiss, winding his hands into your hair to pull you as close to him as you can, tasting every bit of you. His lips linger, drawing his kisses out to the point where your breath is gone but you don’t care.  He tastes so good, those exquisitely soft, perfectly pink lips the perfect fit to yours, his hands so strong and gentle at the same time.

The length of his body is pressed up against yours, and wrapped up in the intensity of this kiss you’re pushing your body against his, twining your leg with his fuzzy one, and you can feel peaks of electricity in your blood, like your whole body is on edge.  It’s not long before you can feel his reaction, it’s hard against your thigh, and suddenly he’s breaking the kiss and taking a deep breath.  His cheeks are pink, and he speaks before you can utter a word.

“Damn, he’s at it again….Sorry, love, we men need an off-switch apparently.” He laughs nervously and pushes his hands through his hair.  “Did you pick a movie…?  We can-“. You take a deep breath and cut him off before he can get another word out.

“Teddy…” you whisper softly, “I don’t want to watch a movie.”  You brush your fingers through the long strands on his forehead, and gaze up at him, trying to convey your message without words.  You could literally lose yourself in those sea-blue eyes.  He raises an almost non-existent eyebrow and says “Whaddya want to do then? Kind of a crappy afternoon to go anywhere, innit…?”

You stop yourself from giggling, but only just. Why are boys so DENSE sometimes? You take another deep breath, lock eyes with him and cup his cheek.  You kiss him softly, and then trace his lips with your fingertips.  “No…I don’t want to go out either.  I want to stay right here.  With you.”  You take in every last molecule of oxygen you possibly can, steel yourself, and pull yourself to a halfway sitting position.  “I want YOU, Teddy.  All of you.” And you exhale, watching for his reaction, your lip between your teeth.

His eyes widen, suddenly realizing what you’re trying to tell him.  “Babe…I know I got a bit carried away just then, I don’t want you to feel like you have to do this.  I love you, and you have my word I’m not in a rush…”

He’s looking at you, such tenderness in his eyes, and an uncertainty that’s so endearing you find yourself falling all over again.  Your heart is simply racing, your blood pulsing through your body as you pull yourself upright and gaze into his eyes, wanting so badly to convey what you’d been dying to tell him.  Lacing your fingers with his, you press a soft kiss to his warm fingertips and press both of your intertwined hands to your chest, to your heart that was hammering at the expression on his face, and tried to put everything you were feeling into the shaky words that spilled from your lips.  You wanted, NEEDED, him to know just how much you wanted this with him.

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it, Teddy. I love you.  So much.  I always knew that the first time I had sex, I didn’t want it to be slam-bam high school thing. I didn’t want to “lose it” just to say I’d done it.  I wanted it to be with someone that wanted to actually make love to me, not just get laid.  I wanted to be sure I was in love and that he was in love with me.  And I am.  You know me better than anyone, and every little thing you do shows me how much you love me.  You’ve never once expected a thing in return, never pressured me, and that makes me want you. It makes me sure that you’re who I’ve been waiting for.”  You take a breath, feeling the warmth in your cheeks and look into his eyes, awaiting his response.

The look on his face…it was something you would tuck away and keep with you for as long as you lived.  There was such love and devotion in his eyes, and when he spoke, you could hear the emotion.  “You’ve no idea just how much I’ve fallen in love with you.  I never wanted to push you for anything, because the thought of pushing you away scares the shit out of me.  Just holding you, it makes me feel like I have the whole world, I don’t need anything else.”  He takes a shaky breath and continues. “I know how long you’ve waited for this…I mean…I- I just want you to be sure.”  He’s looking at you, biting his lip and playing with the edge of his hoodie.

You find that all of a sudden, your nerves have died down, and you know without a single doubt, that you’ve made the right decision.  You want this so badly, and more importantly, you want HIM.  You tip his chin up and catching his gaze, you touch your nose to his, once, and then again.  The biggest smile you’ve ever seen spreads across his whole face.

“We’ll take it slow, I promise…” he whispers, cupping your face.  “If you want me to stop, you’ve just got to say it.”  He gently lowers you back onto the bed, making sure you’ve got a pillow under your head, and slowly, oh so slowly, he lowers his head and begins to place the softest kisses all along your jawline, and your neck, and even your collarbone.  You let your eyes drift shut, enjoying the sensation of his lips and tongue worshipping you, leaving what feels like a trail of fire on every bit of skin he touches. He drops one last kiss at the tops of your breasts and looks up at you, wanting to make sure it was okay to move on. You’re not sure you can even speak coherently anymore, so you arch your chest up and breathe deeply, smiling at him and nodding.  He climbs over top of you, and you part your legs so he can settle in, wanting every part of him to be as close to you as possible.  He shakes his, almost imperceptibly, like he can’t believe this is happening, and lowers himself, supporting his weight with one arm, and he takes a moment just to look into your eyes and gaze at you.  

“I want to make you feel amazing…trust me?” he says softly, looking at you for permission.  

“Without a doubt.” You say softly.  You tangle your fingers in his hair and tilt your face to catch his lips, the need to feel them, to taste them, overwhelming you.  Your tongue gently parts his lips, sliding into his mouth, desperate to taste him.  His tongue tangles with yours, his breathing shallow, and it’s like he CANNOT get enough of you.  It is so sexy.  He breaks away from you, and biting his lip he smiles slow and sexy.  His fingers trail down your cheek, traces your jawline and run down your shoulder and neck.  One hand splays on your bared midriff, and the other catches the hem of your cami, slowly easing it up your body.  You bite your lip, knowing what he wants, and you arch your body so he can pull it off of you.  You lay back against the pillows, and notice that he’s just looking at you, drinking you in. He has the sweetest smile on his face, and when he notices you fidgeting, looking a bit…self-conscious, he shakes his head and tips your head up to meet his gaze.

“You’re so beautiful.  Every single inch of you.  I could just sit here and look at you for hours.  How did I get so goddamn lucky…”

You blush, and he kisses your cheek softly. He moves himself down the bed, and looks at you with a twinkle in his eye, a small grin playing at his features. He begins at your collarbones, and begins leaving a trail of soft, wet kisses, soft lips followed by his sexy tongue, from one side to the other, and then traces a path down between your breasts. He plumps one up with his hand, and your breath stutters as his lips find your nipple.  His tongue swirls around the sensitive bud, alternating between gentle tugs and flicks.  While his mouth lavishes one nipple, his other hand is gently squeezing and massaging your other breast.  The sensations coursing through your body have you practically panting, your body writhing as he teases you.  It’s as though there’s an electric wire straight from your breasts right to your groin, what he’s doing feels SO good and you want more, MORE.

“Ed…God…” you moan, arching your body, trying to press your body into him as much as you possibly can. He’s switching between your nipples; sucking, tugging, nibbling, and it’s driving you to madness.  “More?” he asks softly, looking up at you, wanting to be sure.

“Yes….please….” your body is moving of its own accord, needing…what you weren’t sure, but so much more.  He pulls away from your breasts, and begins kissing his way back down your overly sensitive body.  He leaves a trail of kisses under each breast, and slowly, tortuously, makes his way down to your belly button.  His tongue dips into it as his focus shifts downwards, and he leaves feather light kisses from one hip to the other, all the way across.  You know where he’s headed, and your brain can barely comprehend what’s about to happen.  His mouth had never travelled your body this way, and it was leaving points of fire under every bit of skin he touched.  His hand slides under your leg and bends it at the knee, pushing it back gently, and does the same to your other leg, just as softly.  You feel utterly exposed in this position, but you’re so worked up that the thought doesn’t last long.  He lets the pads of his fingers skate up and down your thighs, tracing the length of your calves, even caressing your feet.  “Okay?” he whispers looking at you, and all you can do is nod, your body urging him on.

His lips are on you, his mouth leaving trails down the inside of each thigh, kisses on the insides of your knees.  He switches to your feet, gently lifting them and kissing the arches of your feet and OH god who knew feet were sexy and when he’s finished there he begins kissing his way up your legs, slowly, up one side, then he switches to the other leg, loving every inch of that one, from top to bottom.  You can feel his warm breath on you as he settles himself between your parted legs, and he gently hooks his fingers inside the waistband of your teeny shorts, gently tugging them down your thighs.  You lift your bum so he can pull them off, and he gently tosses them off to the side.  He works his way back up the insides of your legs, leaving butterfly kisses in his wake, tingles and jolts of electricity with every touch.  You feel his teeth skimming the softest part of the inside of your thigh, kissing, nibbling, and tasting every bit of your skin.  He stops, and grasps your thighs gently, pushing them open a bit more so he can have complete access, and suddenly you feel his fingers trace your lips, pushing them open oh so gently.  He very gently kisses the creases where your legs met your centre, and with his tongue, gently paints a stripe from the base of your slit all the way to the top.  Your whole body lifts off the bed as you gasp from the lightning strikes penetrating your belly, you’ve never experienced this kind of sensation, it’s overwhelming and SO GOOD and why in the hell have you waited this long?  

“Feel good, babe?” he murmurs, his face buried in your slit. You manage to lift your head enough to see the look of rapture on his face as he’s tasting you.  “You taste so fucking sweet.  I’ve wanted to do this for so long…”  His tongue is alternating between long, torturous licks and gentle nibbles at your labia.  It’s a storm you can barely weather, but God it is SO GOOD and in between trying to remember to breath, you manage to tell him “MORE.  Oh my…Teddy, please….!” You’re losing control of your body and you’re writhing under his ministrations, just completely out of control.  

“Anything for you, love” he grins, and pushing your lips back, his tongue finds that sweet pink spot.  His tongue swirls around and around it, nudging that sweet little pink button, like a piece of delicious candy, and your hands find his hair, that silky soft tangle of fiery curls, and you thread your hands through it, pressing his face as tightly against you as you can, completely lost to the building sensations in your belly.  You can’t form coherent words, just gasps, moans, guttural sounds that you had no idea could come from you.  His arms, the bright colours of his ink so sexy against the bare expanse of your skin, wrap around your thighs, pressing them to the sides of his head. He’s pulling you closer to him so his face is all but engulfed, the deep, throaty sounds escaping from his throat as he devours you so indescribably sexy.  His tongue is thrashing your clit, back and forth, quick and light, over and over and over, and you can’t comprehend the delicious fiery tightening in your belly, it’s SO GOOD, it feels like climbing the highest mountain and you want so badly to jump off that edge, and like he’s reading your mind, suddenly he switches from flicking and thrashing to sucking that little pink bundle of nerves right into his mouth and your mouth is wide open, there’s no words, your whole body is lifted up and your muscles locked, it’s like thunder crashing and lightning striking and like NOTHING you have ever felt before, your body is trying to jump out of your skin and there’s spots in your vision that don’t make sense but OH PLEASE NEVER STOP and he keeps sucking and tugging, helping you ride out this incredible explosion, your hands still in hair, keeping him exactly where you need him to be. Your body is STRAIGHT up off that bed, arching into his mouth, “TEDDY…” you gasp, as you fly off that cliff, riding out the most intense sensations you have EVER experienced in your life.  Finally the sensations begins to ebb away, your body sags back against the bed and you look down at the face between your legs, with a sated, disbelieving smile on your face.

He kisses your thighs one last time, and lifts himself up.  He crawls up the bed and gently nestles himself on top of you, catching your lips in a kiss, and stroking your hair, your cheek.  “That was so fucking sexy…” he murmurs.  “Incredible watching you, listening to you come undone….was it what you hoped for?”  

You pick your head up off the pillow, and gaze at him, trying to figure out how to put what just happened into words.  “That was…Teddy…that was incredible.  It was…I don’t even.  Holy shit.”  Your head flops back on the pillow, and he cracks a little boy grin at your words and dips his face to catch your lips for a kiss.  

Your ability to breathe is only just returning to normal, and as you lay sprawled beneath him, all you can think is how you love him so much right at this moment.  You bite your lip, and look at him, knowing what you’d like to do next. You kiss him softly, once, twice and run your fingers down his cheek.  You pull yourself up to a sitting position, and looking him in the eye, you hook you fingers under the edge of his hoodie and begin to drag it up his body.  He grins, and lifts his arms to help you get it off.  His shirt follows, and you awkwardly fumble with his belt buckle, trying to undo it. You manage to unbuckle it, and carefully unbutton his jeans and pull the zipper down.  He’s watching you, letting you take the lead.  You pause, wondering how to go about getting his pants down without looking like you have NO idea what you’re doing.  You can see him smiling at you, laughter in his eyes, and he lifts his hips without a word, helping you to peel his jeans off his legs. Once those are out of the way, he pulls you back down on the bed, and finds your lips.  His lips, so soft, so full, they taste so good.  Long, lingering kisses, deep kisses that you could feel down to the tips of your toes.  Kisses full of promise and passion and tenderness.  

Your let your hand fall to his hip, your fingers playing with the edge of his boxer briefs.  His hands have found your ass, cupping and kneading, squeezing, as he continues to bruise your mouth with kisses, tasting you with his tongue.  Your legs are intertwined, and you’re beginning to feel his reaction against your hip.

Your fingers slide under the waistband of his boxers, wanting to explore what was waiting for you.  His hips stutter as he realizes what you’re doing, and he pulls back to look you in the eye.  “Only if you’re sure, Love”, he whispers.  

“Mmm, I’m sure…” you whisper, a smile tugging at your lips.  “Just…tell me if I’m doing it right?”

“Trust me Babe…there’s VERY little you could do wrong right about now” he chuckles.  

He shimmies his boxers down and you pull them off and WHOA.  Wow. Not like you didn’t know what a penis looked like…but, um. It was BIG.  How was that supposed to-?  Never mind. You’d get there.  Right now….you run your fingertips up his thigh, sifting the fuzzy hairs there between your fingers, enjoying the shiver you can feel run through his body.  You let your fingers walk to that soft crease where his thigh meets his groin, and then tentatively, you gently let your fingers wrap around his length, and give him one long stroke, letting your fist stop at the head.  Wow….so hot to the touch, but smooth.  Like silk.  A low throaty moan escapes Ed’s throat as his head falls back, enjoying the touch of your hand.  

You gently let your hand continue to glide along the length of his penis, from the base to the tip, and judging by the quick, raspy breaths falling from Ed’s mouth, you’re doing something right.  You LOVE the effect your touch is having on him, and on the next stroke, you gently tighten your fist, tugging the head and the hiss that escapes his lips is so satisfying.

“Jesus baby….” He just manages to get out. ”You’re gonna be my undoing….”

He slides his fingers into your hair, pulling you close so he can kiss you.  Not so tender this time, it’s fierce and passionate, the lust he’s feeling spilling out of him into you.  You’re moving your hand more quickly, and you can feel his length thickening and growing as you stroke him.  It’s a heady, powerful feeling that his body is reacting this way because of you. Between strokes and tugs, you gently cup his balls, and watch him carefully, afraid of squeezing too tight.  “Shit…babe…like that”, he hisses, and you happily pick up the pace, loving the sound of his voice, the way his eyes are squeezed shut, the way his leg is tensed as he braces his body.  His hips stutter, and your eyes widen as you notice a bead of fluid roll out of the slit in the tip of his penis, as you’re pumping and stroking.  You’re surprised at his how sexy, how pretty, it is. Framed by the same soft, orange strands that adorn the rest of his body, the plush, pink head, the silky soft shaft…it was incredible.  You loved how rock hard he was, that you were the one that make it that way.  The foreskin was stretched back now, and the breathy sounds coming from his lips are coming fast and you can tell he’s fast losing control.  He sucks in a breath and his hand is suddenly on yours, clumsily pulling it away.

“Fucking hell… feels so good,” he gasps, “but…stop. …I don’t want to finish like this, not like this.”  His mouth is yours, his tongue is tasting every bit of you, and his body flush with yours.  He cups your cheek, and staring at you tenderly.  He tilts your face up, and touches his nose to yours.  “…Love you so much, baby.  I want you so damn bad…”  He whispers this, but there is so much intensity to his words, such reverence. It takes your breath away.  You push yourself back against the pillows, and wrap your fingers into the sweaty curls at the base of his neck, pulling him close.  You press your lips to his and lift your hips to his.  “I want you too, Teddy, make love to me.”  You take a deep breath, ready to take the plunge (in more ways than one…) when through the emotions and lust you remember something important.  

You twist your body and your hand finds the knob on the drawer beside your bed, and you fumble in the drawer, your fingers finding the box.  Ed cranes his head, looking at what you’re doing, and then smiles knowingly.  “How’d I never notice you having rubbers in there before??” he says with a teasing grin.

“Because I didn’t!” you look at him with a raised eyebrow and a teasing grin, and then purposefully turn your head and motion to his backpack.  His eyes widen, and his cheeks turn the most ADORABLE shade of pink.  “Um…” he stutters with an adorable innocent boy smile on his face, “Always be prepared??”

“I love that you cared enough to want to be safe, to protect me”, you say, softly kissing his lips.  “That and the fact that you left them in there.” you giggle softly.

“I just figured…I mean, I didn’t want you think I was trying to-“.  You cut him off.  “Teddy…Shut up.  No more words, I’m not upset.  I love you and I want you.  Now.  Please, Teddy…”  You slide your fingers into his beard and tug him close, looking him straight in the eyes. He swallows hard, his breathing suddenly quicker.  “I want you too” he whispers and gently pulls the box from your hand.  He fishes out a foil packet, and as you watch with wide eyes, he quickly tears it open and looks at you, his eyes hooded.  He quickly slides the condom down over his length, and then you feel his soft hand slide under your ass cheek and he tugs you down.  You swallow deeply, your blood tingling and coursing through every part of your body. You shakily exhale; trying to remember to breathe, and let your legs fall open, your heart hammering in your chest. Ed lifts himself up, and crawls up over your body, moving slowly and gazing at you with such love and softness.

“Babe…look at me.”  He can obviously sense your nerves, and he brushes his fingers down your cheek, under your chin and drops a kiss between your breasts.  “I wouldn’t ever hurt you, we’ll take it slow. Promise…”  

He gently grasps your calf and pushes your leg back just a bit, and his lips are on you, lingering and tender and sweet, tugging your upper lip, then your bottom lip, deepening the kiss as he covers his body with yours.  Your leg is hiked up, pinned to his waist, and he’s leaning on his forearm, nestled between your legs.  He carefully lifts himself just a bit, and takes himself in hand, guiding his penis gently to your slit, and allows the head to just slip between your folds.  He makes no move to penetrate, not yet, but just gently slides the head of his dick against your cleft, allowing you to adjust to the sensation, up and down between your lips, allowing the moisture that’s gathered there to lubricate his length so that it glides like silk.  Your eyes close tight and your head falls back, GOD, he’s not in you yet but it feels SO good, so intimate, the anticipation is almost too much.  It feels like your blood is going pulse right out of your body.  

A low moan rumbles from his throat and he lets out a deep breath as feels you begin to surround him.  “You’re so wet, babe….It’s so hot.  You’re so sexy….” He groans as you tilt your hips up, wanting more.

He stops the gliding motion, and gazing into your eyes, he gently pulls your other leg up so their pinned to either side of his waist, and then reaching down between the two of you, he positions himself at your entrance.  He cups your face, and with so much tenderness it nearly undoes you, he touches his nose to yours.

Your heart is so full, you love him SO much, and you want nothing more than to stay with him like this forever.  You gasp as you feel the tip of him gently push against your opening, past your sensitive tissues, and your body jerks as you tense up. He gently strokes your hip and you hear him breathe the words “Relax, Love…I’ve got you”, as he kisses your lips. He only pushes himself in a bit, just the head, slowly, letting you adjust to his size. “…Tell me when…” he whispers, letting his fingers run up your thighs, leaving fiery trails behind them. You respond by tightening your legs around him, and squeezing his bum to press him closer.  He pulls his hips, back and in one slow motion, very gently, he fills you.  

You bite down hard, gasping, oh GOD, you knew it would hurt a bit, but it STINGS. Fuck.  Tears prick at your eyes as your sensitive flesh stretches in a way it hasn’t ever before.  His voice, it’s in your ear again, soft and reassuring.  “I love you so much, babe….I promise it will feel so much better. I won’t move till you tell me to…”  His thumbs tenderly wipe away the moisture under your eyes, and he slows his body, and strokes your face.  He stays buried inside you, and concentrates on kissing you until you’ve no breath left in you, and slowly you realize your body is adjusting to his size.  The sting is dying out, but the feeling of being stretched that way, it’s something you must get used to.  He’s not moved, just holding you, caressing you, loving you, and remaining deep inside you while your body adjusts to him.

“Baby…” he half moans, “Let me try-“.  You kiss him and urge him on with your hips, and he slowly lifts his hips and slowly pulls himself part way out, not all the way, and nudges his head through your slick folds, bumping up against your clit, and slowly thrusts back into you, gently, unhurriedly.  Oh, oh not so painful anymore, it…there’s still quite the sting as you stretch to fit him, but it’s wonderful, the feeling of him filling you up, actually being INSIDE you…The thought pops through that it’s happening, you’re actually having SEX. You push aside the urge to giggle and the thought is extinguished as both his hands find your ass, and he pulls his hips back, pulling almost all the way out but not quite and oh, it’s a surprisingly empty feeling, you want him back and your hands run down the length of his back to the rise of his ass and tug him, beckoning him to keep going, heavy breaths, loud breaths, falling from your lips, and he groans at your reaction, setting a slow, languorous pace, your ass in his hands and he continues to thrust in to you, long, gentle strokes, filling you up.  You can feel your walls tightening around him every time he enters you, wanting to keep him inside you.  “You’re so goddamn tight….Jesus!” he grunts as you envelop him at every stroke. “You feel so fucking amazing….you alright baby??” he whispers in your ear.

You manage an “Oh…oh… yes….” And you tighten your legs around him, pressing your feet into his back, urging him on.  One hand slides out from under your ass, and he moves it up to your hair, his fingers tangling in the long strands falling over your shoulders.  His lips are on your neck, leaving a wet trail from your pulse point down to your shoulder and across your collarbones.  His breathing is heavy, uneven, and the hand that’s tangled in your hair and cupping your face is pinning you to the pillows, and his mouth frantically finds yours, kissing you deeply, his tongue everywhere, and not once do his hips stop moving, his body is lifting and pressing into you, over and over and it feel SO good, the feeling of him filling you up, every bit of his soft, warm body pressed against yours.

“More Babe…I need…ohh…” you gasp, trying to find the words but failing.  

“Oh, love….Yes…Fucking hell!” he grunts, lifting himself up off of you a bit, supporting himself with his hands and forearms, switching his strokes from long, languid thrusts where he’s not even pulling all the way out of you, to quicker, rhythmic, more frenetic thrusts, the head almost all the way out before he plunges back in, and you let one leg drop, using your foot to brace yourself against the mattress, allowing yourself to open to him as much as possible.  You’re concentrating on the connection between you, the way your bodies fit together so perfectly, the zings and flutters and sparks that his every movement sends pulsing through your body.  The way he’s still cupping your face, caressing your neck, your shoulder, the rise of your breasts, how he can’t help but be drawn back to your lips, his kisses are so full of desire and lust, yet so tender.  Like a promise with every touch.  It’s so damn intimate. In this moment, with your heart and your body so incredibly full, you know that THIS is why you waited.  

He’s gasping with every movement, every thrust, and he’s trying to keep his eyes open, watching you and wanting to take you in, and holy GOD, the desire and drive in his eyes, how his pupils are blown and the way his mouth is dropping open with every sweet stroke, like he can’t control the sensations, it is sexy beyond words.  Your hands find their way to the back of his head, tangling in those delicious sweaty curls at the back of his neck, kissing him so deeply you could just about devour him.  

“Babe…so close…” he hisses, gritting his teeth and you realize he’s holding back and waiting for you, not wanting to put his needs ahead of yours. You let a hand drift down to rise of his ass cheek, and let the other hand find his jaw, and kiss him deeply, gasping for breath as the sensations race through your body.  You realize that all you want is for him to find that peak, to find his release, because the earth shattering climax he gave you with his tongue, that beautiful mouth, it was enough.  The feeling of him being inside you, being a part of you, him worshipping you like this? It was enough.  You had all the time in the world to explore each other from now on, and right now, this moment was all about him.  

His hips are moving in short, messy thrusts as he chases the sensations that are taking him over.  “Baby it’s okay…” you whisper, staring into his eyes and wanting him to feel as good as he made you feel.  “Let go!” you gasp, as little explosions of pleasure ricochet through your body, it’s insane how amazing he feels, and you pick your hips up and try to match his thrusts, pushing your pelvis against him, grinding against him, wanting every bit of contact you can get.  The hand that’s tangled in your hair tightens, his thumb brushing your ear, and he’s got his forehead pressed to yours as he tries to maintain eye contact. You can feel a bead of sweat roll off his temple, and the sounds escaping his mouth are now completely out of his control.  Low, throaty moans, guttural noises that you had no idea he was capable of, and you want this.  Oh you want this. You hold his face between your hands, and look him in the eyes, a feat, because he can barely keep them open, and kiss him so softly, so tenderly. “I love you….God, I love you.” You whisper to him, caught up in overwhelming emotion.  

His eyes are fluttering, and his whole body tenses up, his muscles caging you onto the bed.  “Ah ah ah…!” He’s making a concerted effort to lock eyes with you, to keep connected, but that battle is lost as they slam shut, his orgasm taking him over. “Jesus, baby I…Ah…Oh Fuck!” and his whole body shudders as his hips finds you one last time, and he’s pushing your body up the bed, bracing himself against you, trying to keep every last inch of you wrapped around him.  His muscles are tensed and shaking, and you can feel him shudder once more, and then his whole body sags, soft against you, and his head falls to your chest.  

You’re still struggling to catch your breath, your heart slamming against your ribcage, and the emotion coursing through you is threatening to overflow.  Ed, still panting himself, gingerly lifts himself off you, reaches down and hooks his finger into the condom as he gently pulls out of you, assuring it won’t slip off. “Oh…” you breathe, feeling the emptiness.  He slides it off quickly, and discreetly tucks it into a Kleenex he grabs from your nightstand and puts it off to the side. He rolls back over on to his side, facing you, and he can’t hide the smile spreading across his face as he cups your cheek and kisses you, over and over and over, with such fervour it almost renders you breathless.  He breaks away and a soft smile plays across his features as he just gazes at you, not saying word, just seemingly savouring the moment.  He pulls you into his chest, and you savour his warmth, wanting nothing more than to be held.

“Ed…” you falter, trying to figure how to put what you’re feeling into words.  “Every time I thought about what this experience would be like….when I thought about what I wanted it to mean?  Teddy, this was it.  I-“. He puts his finger to your lips.

“I love you.” The way he says this, it’s so quiet, but so full of conviction.  “You are everything to me…and it means the world to me that somehow I’m deserving enough that you chose to share yourself with me.  That was…fucking incredible.  YOU are fucking incredible.”

You smile softly, and run your fingers lazily through his beard.  You stretch your arms above your head, and then your legs, and as you go to cuddle your body into his chest, you suddenly feel…something…on the sheets between your legs. You glance down, and oh. Oh God.  You knew it would hurt, when he entered you, but you didn’t think about the possibility of THIS.  Your face feels a thousand shades of pink, though you know there’s no real reason to feel embarrassed.  It’s just some blood, but still…Ed notices your discomfort, the blush on your cheeks, and he looks where you’re looking.  

“Love, it’s no big deal…honestly.  Happens the first time.  I’m not bothered!”  He brushes the hair from your eyes and kisses your cheek, a reassuring smile on his face. You swing your legs over the side of the bed, and drop a kiss on his nose before pulling your cami back over your head.  You’re suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious.

“Gonna run to the bathroom, baby, clean myself up a bit…” you smile awkwardly.

“Course, Love.  Hurry back though….need cuddles from my girl after all that…” he murmurs with a crooked smile.  You hurry off to the bathroom, clean yourself up, pee because that seems like a good idea, and run a brush through your hair.  You stop for a second, and look at yourself in the mirror, studying your features. You feel different….empowered and well, like a real grownup. You lift your shoulders and feel a grin spread across your face. You finally did it. No longer a virgin!  You giggle, flip your hair back and head back to the bedroom.  You walk through the door and stop short, staring at your bed. Sweet boy, in the 5 minutes you’ve been in the bathroom, he’s pulled the bloody sheet off your bed, and put fresh linens back on.  He really does think of everything. A disbelieving smile crosses your face, and you shake your head slightly, so enamoured with this boy. You feel a strong of pair of arms wrap around you from behind, and you let out a soft sigh of contentment as you let your head fall back onto his chest.  Your fingers absent-mindedly begin tracing the colorful shapes on his forearms, and you feel his lips in your hair.

“Best day ever, innit?” he says softly. “Best girl ever too…”

You spin around and look him in the eyes, tracing his cheeks and jaw with your fingers, pushing a few stray fiery strands of hair from his forehead.  “You’re not so bad yourself, baby…” you whisper with a smile.

“Mmmmmmm” he hums contentedly, and softly, slowly, he leans in.  He touches his forehead to yours, and you feel his fingers tip your chin up, and just when you thought your heart couldn’t take anymore, he touches his nose to yours.

[thescholarlystrumpet]

To Kiss the Fingers of the Rain Rated Explicit

(6.5K words - Complete)

The March smut prompt for @a-monthly-rumbelling Storm, Adultery, Warmth, Loneliness, Rough

On AO3 HERE

Mr. Gold poked sulkily at the dying fire. He needed to put on another log but he barely felt like leaving the chair, his limbs heavy with the bottle of red wine he'd almost polished off entirely.

He eyed the blanket on the back of the nearby sofa, noting with vague disinterest as lightning flashed through the half open blinds behind it. He exhaled loudly and glanced down at the book that lay open in his lap. He'd probably read the same page three times by now but he couldn't seem to recall what it said. Rain began to patter against the window. Earlier, he'd had half a mind to watch the sun set by the lake but the sky had turned so gray, it hadn't been worth the effort of getting up.

It was nearly night but he wasn't sleepy enough to retire to the lonely little bed in the next room. Maybe he'd sleep in front of the fire, if the sofa wouldn't be hell on his bad leg. Maybe the rain would help, a little soothing ambient noise to drown out the roiling storm in his mind.

He drained the glass beside him and refilled it, noting another flash of lightning and counting the seconds until the roll of thunder to gauge the distance. The raindrops were heavier now, pelting hard. They almost sounded like tapping. Or was that knocking?

“Hello? Can anyone hear me?” A familiar voice was calling on the other side of the door. A female voice. With an accent he wouldn't soon forget.

He launched himself to both feet, leaning awkwardly on his cane and nearly knocking over the antique table beside his chair.

“I'll… I'll be right there…” he called, his pulse rocketing and head spinning from standing up so fast. He narrowly skirted the sofa arm by pivoting, sending a shooting pain up his bad leg. Grimacing and biting back a few choice words, he made it to the door and flung it open.

Outside stood exactly the person he had hoped- feared? - might be there. Miss Belle French, librarian by trade, bookworm by choice, and the unwitting object of his most cherished fantasies. She was drenched from head to toe.

“Mr. Gold!” She exclaimed in a tone he liked to think was pleasant surprise. “I'm so glad you're here!”

“Miss French,” he greeted her in return, trying hard (well maybe not that hard) not to notice that the floral print shirt she wore was plastered to her like a second skin. Even in the dying firelight, he could see the line of her polka dotted bra.

She shifted from one foot to the other, placing one hand on the doorframe. “Um, would it be… that is, can I come in?”

He realized he'd be gaping at her like a pished fish and felt his cheeks go hot as he stepped back to let her in. “Oh! Of course.”

“Thank you!”

She scurried past and he blinked at her back wondering if perhaps he'd already fallen asleep and this was an alcohol induced dream. If so, he very much hoped he wasn't waking up anytime soon.

Slinging a small backpack to the ground, Belle knelt immediately before the fire and lifted her hands toward it. “Do you mind if I add another log?” She glanced over her shoulder at him.

He reminded himself that she wasn't here to be ogled, she'd simply sought the shelter of his cabin in the rising storm. “Not at all. I was just about to do the same.”

She gave a sigh of relief and pulled a log from the pile, prodding it with the poker until it caught and the flames danced higher. Sitting back on her heels, she lifted her sopping hair up off her neck and bent toward the hearth. “I'm so sorry to just drop in on you like this, Mr. Gold.”

Her back arched and his eyes were drawn to the delicious curve of her backside, accentuated by the way her denim shorts clung. He caught the movement of her half-turning to face him just in time to avert his gaze and shuffle toward the hall cabinet in search of towels.

“No matter, Miss French. Here, I'm afraid I've only got a few towels but there are some extra blankets…” he held the towel toward her and she jumped to her feet to take it.

“You are a lifesaver. I mean it. I feel like such an idiot getting caught out there so unprepared.” Her face had regained some color from the heat of the fire but the rest of her was still soaked through. He forced himself to look only at her face. Her eyes. Such beautiful eyes… blue as the ocean and just as capable of drowning a man… Fuck, he needed to slap himself sober before he started spouting poetry at her.

He cleared his throat. “Does seem like an… ill advised time for a casual stroll.”

“It wasn't supposed to rain today according to the morning forecast. And it's my day off so I thought a hike would be nice.” She made a broad hand gesture. “So here I was just traipsing through the woods, not paying the least bit of attention. Next thing I know, it's pouring and I had forgotten to even pack my emergency poncho! I was never a Girl Scout but you'd think I would know better...” An exaggerated sigh. “I'm really quite embarrassed. I hope you won't hold this against me, Mr. Gold…” She looked up at him from under her lashes.

There were a great many things Gold wanted to hold against Belle French, this was not one of them.

He shrugged and muttered something noncommittal. If he couldn't seem think in anything but innuendo or prose, it was best he spoke as little as possible.

Belle frowned and looked at the floor briefly before glancing around. “Where is the bathroom?”

He pointed and Belle ducked her head in silent thanks as she clutched the towel to her chest and head the direction he indicated.

He made his way back to his chair and scrubbed at his unshaven face with both hands. Oh fuck, he was so fucking fucked. How on earth was he going to get through however long this storm would be without saying something truly regrettable? He needed to sober up, and fast. But the only things he had on hand to eat were cans of soup, beans, and a container of some kind of fancy trail mix that Cora had eaten in the brief period of time she deigned to visit the cabin with him. Before her latest boy toy and the trip to Las Vegas she didn't think he knew about.

Fucking Cora.

He glared down at the wedding ring on his left hand. He twisted it with the opposite hand, giving it a sharp tug, but the damn thing wouldn’t budge. He’d have to try again with some soap or olive oil. No need to leave the horrible reminder of his most recent mistake on any longer than was necessary.

Earlier that day, with the aid of his driver, he'd packed all Cora’s things into boxes and left half of them in the hall with a note telling her to vacate the premises and call his lawyer if she ever wanted to see the other half. Staying at the cabin overnight had been an added precaution. He fully expected to come home to at least a few broken antiques. They were worth the price of getting her out of his life for good.

He was tired of feeling like a damn fool. Tired of looking for warmth in a heart made of ice. Tired and maudlin and drunk as hell. No fit company at all for the lively librarian currently drying off in his bathroom.

He'd had several conversations with Belle in the years since she moved to Storybrooke and they'd never gone quite as smoothly as he would have hoped. Often enough he found himself on the wrong side of tongue tied but she never seemed to mind. She laughed at the ridiculous jokes he made and could be persuaded to chat for quite some time just by being asked what she was currently reading.

To most the citizens of their little town, he was a silver tongued serpent, robbing them blind through the clever use of legal jargon they didn't understand or bother to question when they were desperate to make a deal. The willful ignorance of others had made him a rich man, if not a popular one. Since he'd never suffered fools well, it hadn't seemed to matter. Until little Miss Belle showed up, campaigning to reopen the library and forcing Gold to remember he once valued some things more than money or power.

“I suppose it's probably too much to ask if you have a dryer in here, yeah?” Belle's question preceded her into the room.

“Low tech out here, I'm afraid.”

Gold was shaking his head when he caught sight of her. In a towel. His towel. With - presumably - nothing beneath it.

His mouth went dry and he reached for his wine glass before remembering that getting more intoxicated would probably only make things even more awkward.

He silently watched her lay out her damp clothes in front of the hearth and fancied a life where she had been his invited guest rather than an accidental one. They might have walked to the lake together, hurrying back as fast as his leg would allow once the rain began. They'd have laughed as they peeled away one another's soaked clothes, maybe taken a hot shower together before starting the fire. They'd have fallen asleep curled beneath a pile of blankets.

A lump rose suddenly in his throat. He choked it back and pulled himself to his feet. “I was going to make some soup. Would you like some?”

She looked up, a smile spreading across her face. “Oh! Yes please. What kind?”

He blinked. “The canned kind.”

Belle laughed, one hand coming to her mouth. “I meant what flavor. But honestly it doesn't matter. Anything hot would be delightful. Can I help?”

“No, no. You're the guest. Just… enjoy the fire.” The last thing he needed was a half naked Belle in the kitchenette. He might burn the whole place down.

“You're very generous, Mr. Gold.”

He scoffed. “Careful who you say that to in this town. They'll have you committed.” He poured two cans of chicken noodle soup into a pot, added water, and turned on the stove.

“I'm serious. You were such a help with the library and my reading initiative for the school. And...” Her voice was closer now. “I know about the shelter, you know...”

He turned, this time, sincerely surprised. “What shelter?”

“The one you pretend not to know Leroy and Astrid are running.” She had indeed moved closer, leaning her hip against the one unoccupied counter in the kitchen nook. “In the old Fogarty manor that you somehow never manage to sell despite some very valuable offers.”

Gold swallowed hard, absentmindedly stirring the soup. He'd been tempted to sell that house at the edge of town dozens of times, seeing as how he was stuck for property taxes on it, year after year. But he could never find it in himself to kick out the makeshift shelter/soup kitchen Leroy and his former nun fiancée were running. He'd never mentioned to anyone that he knew, just looked the other way and occasionally arranged for anonymous donations to show up at their door.

He wanted to lie to Belle, deny that he had any knowledge of the place. But her eyes caught him and pierced him through to the heart. He looked away and shrugged. “They do good work.”

“And you help them do it,” Belle supplied matter of factly.

“Not selling a building is hardly helping,” he countered.

She moved closer, laying a hand in his arm. “Then why do you let them keep using it?”

His lips pressed tight together as he stared down at the simmering soup. Why hadn't he sold that house? Because he still remembered nights of trying to sleep with a growling belly because papa drank or gambled away the grocery budget. He remembered having to choose between rent and food and the times when there wasn't enough for either.

“Because no one deserves to go hungry,” he admitted at last, his voice rougher than he'd expected. When he ventured another look at Belle, her eyes were bright and her smile soft. No woman had ever looked at him like that, not even his wives.

When she spoke, her voice was low, as well, barely above a whisper. “I always knew you were a good man.”

The urge to disagree pulled at his tongue but with her eyes were keeping him captive, he couldn't seem to say a word. Entranced, he leaned toward her. She was so close, he could capture her lips easily. Time seemed to slow, his blood pumping hard in his ears. Belle's lips parted just slightly, her pupils widening, as her gaze fell to his mouth. And then to his left hand.

As though she'd been burned, she stepped away, releasing his arm. “I… uh, I think the soup is done.”

He settled reluctantly back into reality and nodded, turning off the stove. His heart still thundering in his chest, louder than the storm, he served up the soup. Belle curled into a blanket on the sofa and Gold returned to his chair. They ate in uneasy silence.

The fog of the wine began to ebb away, at last, as Gold snuck glances toward the sofa. It was only a few feet, but Belle seemed miles away from where she'd been only moments ago. He'd very nearly kissed her. And she'd very nearly let him. He was still chewing on this revelation when he realized she had spoken.

“Sorry?” He asked.

“I was just wondering… thinking aloud really… what had brought you up here tonight? I hike past here all the time, but I think this is the first time I've seen you since…” her voice trailed off and she gazed into the fire listlessly.

Curiosity got the better of him. “Since when?”

“Since that day I ran into Cora and she… um, asked me not to hike onto your property ever again.” She finished, fiddling with her spoon.

Gold winced. “Did she threaten you?”

Belle shrugged. “Only with calling Sheriff Graham. I know he'd have laughed it off but it didn't seem worth it to… risk her wrath.”

A snort of laughter escaped him before he could stop it. Then another. Then his shoulders were shaking and the laughter was coming from deep within his gut, part humor and part pain. His eyes pricked with tears as he half doubled in the chair.

Belle looked on in what might have been horrified amusement if he could read her expression through his blurry sight. “Mr. Gold?”

When he could breathe enough to manage words, he chortled out, “I always knew you were smarter than I… Oh christ!” He ran one hand through his hair, swiping at his eyes with the other. A few more low chuckles and he was finally able to meet her eyes. “I’m... I’m sorry Belle, you must think me quite mad.”

She gave a half grin, “that’s never stopped me from talking to you before.”

He returned her grin, feeling oddly lighter than he had in days. “Touche.”

“Can I get in on the joke?”

He took a deep breath, steadying himself. “I’ve left my wife.” Saying the words aloud felt better than he could have imagined.

Belle’s eyes were wide and round as saucers. “When was this?”

“Today, actually. So, speaking of her wrath. I expect to bear quite a lot of it in the coming weeks.”

Belle blinked rapidly. “I’m… I’m so sorry, Mr. Gold.”

He smirked. “I’m not. This has been a long time coming, I promise you.”

“All the same, it can’t be easy.” She set down the soup bowl, shifting in the blankets until she was partially reclined. “I’ve never broken up with anyone.” She laughed softly, “then again, I’ve never really had the chance. I’ve” she looked down at where her hands were twisting in the blanket, “I’ve only ever had one boyfriend - if you can call him that.”

Gold’s eyebrows raised of their own volition. “I admit, I'm surprised to hear it.”

“Why?” Her brow furrowed.

He shrugged. “I can't imagine a girl as beautiful and kind as you wouldn't have to beat men off with a stick.”

Belle flushed prettily, then covered her cheeks with both hands. “Oh! No. I mean, I do get asked out but I retired my beating stick ages ago. Now I just politely decline.”

“Ah that's a pity,” he brandished his cane. “I was going to offer to help.”

Belle giggled. “Maybe if my ex ever comes to town…”

“That bad?”

Belle's mouth twisted. “I thought he was sweet, at first, but that turned out to be just what he wanted me to see.” She sat back up, voice picking up in volume. “Do you know what he told me? He actually had the gall to say that I should feel special because out of all his girlfriends, I was the only brunette.”

“Fucking hell,” his grip on the arm of his chair tightened, feeling a flash of vicious anger at this unknown moron who could possibly treat Belle like something disposable. She deserved to be cherished. “If he could treat you like that, I'd be happy to deliver the beating he deserves. What's his address?”

Belle eyed him for a moment as though she wasn't sure he was entirely joking but then she relaxed, shaking her head. “It's alright, really. I learned a valuable lesson from that mess.”

“Men are scum?” he suggested.

“Never judge a book by its cover. People aren't always who they seem to be and you can't really know what's in a person's heart until you get to know them.”

He couldn't help but smile at her. There was something so pure in this girl. Not naive, as he'd initially suspected, but a genuine kindness. She saw the best in others. Even him. “Is that why you said what you did, earlier? About me being a good man?”

She nodded.

“I'm not, you know,” he reminded her gently. Disillusioning the one person who saw something worthwhile in him would hurt. But this was Belle and he found he just couldn't lie to her.

“I disagree. You let me in from the rain and fed me. You allow the needy be sheltered and fed every day on property that is costing you to maintain - and don't argue with me about that, I know all about property taxes for abandoned buildings from dealing with my dad's old shop.” She rose from the couch and shuffled toward him, the blanket draped over her towel like an overly long toga. “Actions speak louder than words, Mr. Gold.”

He stood as well, his temper beginning to prick him. “Shall I list off all the horrible things I've done in my life? The houses I've foreclosed? The deals I've worded ever so carefully in my favor? The hands I've greased and pockets I've picked?”

Belle threw the hand not holding up the blanket out to one side, palm up. “Do you think I’m a saint? That I’ve never told a lie or two? Made mistakes I regret? That’s being human. I refuse to see anyone as just the sum of their flaws. There is good in you and I see it. I’ve always seen it.”

Gold was practically trembling, the hand not holding his cane clenching and unclenching at his side. This girl didn’t know him at all. How dare she paint this rosy picture based on some deluded fantasy of his merit? How dare she make him want to believe in a fairy tale where he could be anything but the villain. He advanced on her, allowing himself to be as menacing as he knew how to be. “What you see, Miss French, is what you want to see. What you should see is before you right now - this is me.” He gestured to himself. “This is all there is. Just a crippled man with a past full of secrets and regrets. Just the town monster with a gold tooth and a silver tongue, a man who has forgotten what goodness is.”

Belle closed the distance between them, her eyes flashing. “No. You’re wrong.”

Gold made a sound of disbelief at the back of his throat. “And what exactly makes you the expert?” He couldn’t help but notice she was breathtakingly stunning when her temper was up. He clenched his hand tighter.

“Because I can feel it. I see what you can’t even see in yourself!”

Belle’s voice was steadily escalating in tone and volume and he found himself matching it, stepping even closer until they were toe to toe.

“Oh, really? And how is that?” His lips pressed together thinly.

“Because I wouldn’t feel the way I do if you were just a monster!” she shouted, almost directly into his face and it took him nearly a full minute to register what she’d just confessed.

His mouth fell open, disbelief warring with desire and the remaining dregs of indignation. “The way you…”

“Fuck.” She squeezed both eyes shut, scrubbing her free hand over her face. “I told you I’m no saint, Mr. Gold. I’ve spent months - months - lusting after a married man. Practically stalking you, if you must know. Even knowing I shouldn’t… knowing how wrong it was. I couldn’t seem to stop.” She met his eyes again, her face grim.

He shook his head, “Belle, I never thought you were…”

She blinked at him. “You can’t tell me you didn’t know. That you hadn’t even noticed?”

He shook his head more vehemently.

“All those times I kept you at the library desk yammering on about books? The days I’d casually stop in the shop just to browse? God, am I that terrible at flirting?” The last question was asked more of her own feet.

Gold laughed a little giddily, his previous anger fading away, reaching cautiously toward her and tipping her face back up with a finger under her chin. “Belle… did I ever tell you that I have a rather vast personal library?”

She gave him an odd look. “Um, no. I don’t think you’ve mentioned it.”

“There’s a reason for that. It’s chock full of classic literature, plays, even a few modern classics. But I’ve checked out dozens - possibly hundreds - of books I already own. Just for the chance to spend a few minutes with you.”

Belle’s throat worked soundlessly, her breath catching as she looked at him in a state of what almost felt like wonder. “All this time… I thought you only barely liked me. Tolerated me."

“Oh aye,” his voice was low, his natural burr thick as he leaned toward her, tucking a stray auburn curl behind her ear. “I tolerated you. I’d have tolerated a lifetime of just standing there with a desk between us, fishing for anything useful to say. Just for the chance to be near you, enjoy the scent of that strawberry perfume you wear.”

Belle bit her lip, the corners of her mouth curling upward. “It’s shampoo but I don’t think anyone else has ever noticed that it smells like strawberries.” She smoothed a hand up his chest and over his shoulder to wrap around the back of his neck, toying with the ends of his hair in a way that sent sparks down his spine and straight to his groin. “I used to fantasize that you would lean across the desk and kiss me.”

“I had the same fantasy.”

“Did it include more than kissing?” she shot him a coy look, “because mine did.”

“Oh sweetheart,” he crooned, threading his fingers into her hair and cradling the back of her head as she tilted it up, “you have no idea.”

With a push onto her toes, she bridged the gap, pressing her lips to his in a lingering kiss.

Against his lips she murmured “I’ve wanted to do that for so long.” She pulled back with a sigh. “But you are still married. Technically.”

“Technically,” his lip curled as he forced himself to release the woman of his dreams. “I suppose it would be most appropriate to wait until I’ve at least finished filing the paperwork.”

With a baleful look, Belle ran her fingers through his forelock. “I’m awfully tired of waiting though, aren’t you?”

He nodded, taking her hand in his and kissing the fingertips. “And frankly, I've never been much for propriety.” One of Belle's fingers dipped between his lips and he nipped at it.

She gave a semi startled little giggle. “Are we terrible people if we do this?”

He nodded solemnly. “Horrible.” He ducked his head to plant tiny kisses down the side of her jaw. “The worst,” he muttered while nosing along her neck. She made a low sound of encouragement, tilting her head to allow him better access. He nipped at her earlobe, whispering, “the worst of the worst”, before lowering his head to plant an open mouthed kiss just at her pulse point. When he sunk in his teeth, she whimpered, bunching the silk of his button-down shirt in her hand.

“You know what?” she panted.

“Hmm?”

“I think I can live with that.” She let the blanket fall to grasp his face between both hands, pulling his mouth to hers for a searing kiss.

Thanking all his lucky stars and any deity that might be listening, Gold kissed her back with every ounce of longing he'd been holding back since the first time they met. Her hands fell to his buttons as he slid his tongue into her mouth. She practically yanked his shirt down his arms and he was grateful he'd removed the impediment of his cufflinks earlier that evening. She had already turned her attention to his belt buckle, treating it to the same wild abandon.

Not to be outdone, he gave a sharp tug to one side of her towel and it joined the blanket on the floor. Belle reached toward him but he staid her hands.

“I'd like to look at you, Sweetheart. May I?”

Her face, already pink from excitement, flushed a deeper red but she stepped back, nearly stumbling over the heap of towel and blanket. He steadied her then allowed his eyes to roam. Pert, rosy tipped breasts that looked as though they'd been made to fit in his palms, the slope of her waist led to rounded hips, a trimmed thatch of dark curls at their apex. She was, in a word,

“Exquisite,” he breathed.

Her eyes lit up and she wrapped both arms around his neck. “My turn to see you…”

He frowned, thinking of his narrow chest and wiry limbs, his ruined leg and sprinkling of silver in his sparse chest hair. “It won't be nearly as lovely to look upon.”

She pursed her lips. “Mm, I'll be the judge of that.”

He helped her remove his undershirt so he could keep hold of his cane with one hand at all times. Then she unzipped his trousers, kneeling as she pushed them down. His erection bobbed toward her, contained only by the final scrap of his dignity - his silk boxers. She smiled and planted a kiss directly on the head, through the fabric. He swore under his breath, silently vowing to keep that mental image until the end of time.

Her hot breath ghosted over his shaft once more and he felt his cock pulse in response. With another quick kiss, Belle hooked both thumbs into the elastic of his boxers and pulled them down. Gold swallowed hard, willing himself to be still as her half-lidded eyes devoured him inch by inch. He was just beginning to feel a bit twitchy under her scrutiny when Belle leaned in and kissed each of his hipbones. Then each of his thighs. She bent lower and lightly trailed kisses over his good calf before turning to the mass of scar tissue that made up his other calf.

She looked up at him. “Is this alright?”

He nodded, a lump in his throat prohibiting speech. His first wife had blamed the accident when she ran off. Cora had never deigned to touch his damaged leg at all. And the few lovers in between had mostly seemed to pretend it wasn't there.

But Belle, bright beautiful Belle, slowly traced the most prominent scarring with a fingertip before planting little kisses on each one. She kissed her way back up his leg, coming nose to nose once more with his jutting cock. Lightly wrapping one hand around the rigid flesh, she smiled up at him with a half-lidded kind of delight.

“You're perfect.”

Something in Gold’s chest felt as though it was swelling up, fit to burst. He wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or cry but he knew that he'd never desired a woman more in his entire life. Mind, body, and soul. If she never touched him ever again after, he could live on the memories of a single night until they put him in the ground.

Without warning, Belle took him into her mouth. Gold’s knees nearly gave out and he clutched his cane so hard it felt like the handle might crack. He groaned at the sudden hot, wet sensation. Belle’s cheeks hollowed slightly and Gold swore aloud. She took him a little deeper then slid back out almost to the tip before swallowing him once more, as best she could. His heart nearly stopped altogether at the image of his cock, glistening with her saliva, disappearing between those greedy pink lips. Her head bobbed again a few more times, lips moving up and down his shaft. Gold, unable to do anything but moan and enjoy, watched her in wonder. At last, she pulled back, her tongue swirling over the head as she released him with an audible pop.

She looked up with an impish grin. “I’ve wanted to do that too.”

“Fuck me,” Gold pulled her to her feet and kissed her hard.

She gave a throaty little giggle before kissing him again. “I intend to.”

Gold attacked her throat and breasts with kisses, using his cane to support himself as he moved down her body. His mouth found one taut nipple and then the other, suckling and grazing with his teeth as Belle murmured her hearty approval. He swiped his tongue along the sensitive underside of each breast and Belle clutched at his hair, her fingers tugging at the strands. Her back arched toward him and he grinned against the soft flesh of her stomach, flicking the tip of his tongue playfully against her bellybutton.

Belle squirmed and giggled. “Tickles!”

He paused. “Hm?”

She ran a finger down the side of his jaw. “Your stubble.”

Gold ran a hand over his chin. “Mm, perhaps I should have shaved… before we….”

Belle shrugged. “Not worth stopping now. Besides, I don’t mind it a little rough.”

Gold quirked one eyebrow at her. “I’ll keep that in mind…”

She flushed prettily, biting her lower lip.

Gold nipped at the skin of her belly and Belle gave a little squeak of surprise that turned to a gasp of pleasure as he trailed his mouth lower, over her neatly trimmed pubic curls.

Lowering himself to his knees was not easy but he had managed to kick the blankets into a makeshift cushion. He released his cane and gripped her hips, running his thumbs over the crease of each thigh until she parted her legs. Her nether lips were already soaked and the smell of her arousal was making his mouth water. He lapped as far as his tongue could reach, tracing the length of her slit to gather her taste. She was ripe and musky, heady on his tongue. His eyes slid shut as he savored her but a twinge in his bad leg made him flinch.

“Oh!” Belle stepped away, coming back to her knees so they were eye to eye. “That felt amazing but… this can’t be a comfortable position for you…”

Shame heating his face, Gold nodded. Just this once, he’d wanted to forget his infirmity and do something dashing. He ought to have known such privileges were not to be his.

Belle’s brow furrowed. “Hey! I have an idea. Just, um, get comfortable on the blanket, okay?”

He obeyed silently, trying not to let his disappointment in himself ruin the moment. With some maneuvering, he was sitting on the blanket, bad leg stretched before him. Belle bounded across the room and despite his melancholy, sway of her pert little bottom didn’t fail to capture his attention. She threw open the cabinet from whence he had produced her now-abandoned towel and gathered all the blankets into her arms. He began to rise and help her as he caught on to her intention but she tutted at him to stay seated. He couldn’t help but be cheered by the way she bounced, totally unabashed in her nudity, creating a cozy little nest for the two of them.

Once she had finished, she lowered herself to the ground and beckoned him with the crook of a finger. He crawled over, mindful of the aching calf. They stretched out, side by side, and she ran her fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his face.

“Better?” she murmured.

“I don’t deserve you,” he replied, earnestly.

Belle rolled her eyes. “People don’t deserve other people. It doesn’t work that way. I like you. I want to be here with you. Frankly, I’ve never been so glad to be caught in a storm in my life.”

“Likewise,” he whispered, capturing her mouth, his hand snaking down between them to continue what he’d started with his tongue.

Belle gasped against his lips as he slid a finger inside her, the pad of his thumb brushing over her hooded clit. She flung her upper leg over his hips to give him better access. He stroked her gently at first, exploring her molten heat, relishing her soft little sighs and whimpers. She shunted her hips, urging him to go faster, harder. He obeyed eagerly, adding a second finger and crooking both digits in a way that made her thighs start to shake. Belle moaned her release, wetness dripping down his hand and sinking into the blankets between them.  She panted against his neck, her body quivering as her inner muscles fluttered with the aftershocks.

Gold could only hold her in awe, petting her softly until she made a kittenish noise and batted his hand away.

Drawing her head back to meet his eyes, Belle grinned widely. “You are very, very good at that.”

He flushed with pleasure, almost forgetting his own nearly painful need, throbbing against her thigh.

Belle reached between them to take him in hand, aligning him with her entrance. As the head brushed her slickness, Gold fought not to let his eyes roll back in his head. Then a singular rational thought made a terrible appearance. He frowned.

“Belle… I haven't got any, ah, protection…”

She looked at him, upper teeth sinking into her lower lip. Then her face lifted once more. “Oh! Wait!”

Jumping up on slightly wobbly legs, she ran to the small backpack she'd been carrying and pulled out a rose gold wallet. From that she plucked a condom and held it aloft between two fingers.

Gold blinked incredulously. “You forgot an umbrella but remembered that?”

Belle giggled, crossing back to him. “Look, I may never have been a Girl Scout but I do have a best friend whose motto is ‘be prepared.’”

Nestling back into the blankets, Belle tore open the wrapper and rolled the rubber onto his erection before pausing. He pulsed with anticipation in her loose grip.

“How do you want me?” she asked

All day, every day for the rest of my life, he thought giddily.

“Sorry?” he said aloud.

“What’s the best, um, position? For you?” she added, cheeks turning pink.

He swallowed hard and cleared his throat. He couldn’t remember the last time a woman had asked him that question. “Could we… would you mind… being on top?” His voice lifted embarrassingly high, as he pictured Belle’s magnificent breasts bouncing above him as she rode his cock to another gorgeous orgasm.

Belle nodded emphatically, her eyes aglow. “Absolutely.” She straddled his hips the moment he had rolled onto his back, lining them up and sinking down. His mouth fell open as he watched his cock disappear inside her, engulfed by her heat. Placing her hands on his chest, Belle rolled her hips and Gold groaned. He wouldn’t last long but he wanted to see her come again. One hand went to her clit as she settled into a rhythm she seemed to like. His other hand went to breast but she brought the fingers to her mouth, suckling them one by one. He swore loudly as both the image and the sensation sent sparks of electricity straight to his groin. He rocked up into her, meeting her shallow thrusts, still rubbing at her sensitive little nub. She was utterly amazing. She was a fucking goddess, getting herself off on his cock, and he was helpless with want, gritting his teeth to stave off his own building climax. He wanted this perfect, agonizing moment to last forever.

It could not, of course, and he could not regret the blinding wave of bliss that washed over him as he felt her inner muscles clamping down. Belle cried out, her head thrown back with abandon. She collapsed onto his chest, breathing heavily, and they lay in silence as both their hearts raced. He felt himself soften and reached beneath her to make sure the condom didn’t spill. Once it was tied off and tossed away, Belle curled into his side. They were both a sweaty mess and he thought that perhaps this moment was even more perfect than the last.

After a time, Belle broke the quiet. “It’s stopped raining.”

He had almost forgotten about the storm altogether. His chest suddenly felt tight, the muzzy warmth beginning to evaporate. “So it has. I... suppose that means you’ll be wanting to head home soon…”

Belle shrugged against him. “It may start up again. Besides… it’s awfully late… Don’t you think?” She ran a hand through his sparse chest hair, sending a pleasant shiver through him. “It’s probably not all that safe to be wandering around the forest at night.” She turned wide eyes to him, batting her lashes playfully.

The corners of his mouth twitched back upward as he caught onto her ploy. “Mmm, dangerous, in fact.”

Belle leaned in, brushing her lips along his jaw and down his neck. She nipped lightly at his collarbone. “Treacherous, even.”

His arm wrapped snugly around her. “Well, I suppose there’s nothing else for it. You’ll have to stay here for the night.”

“If you think you can bear my company a few more hours?” Her lips closed over his puckered nipple and his fingers involuntarily dug into the flesh of her hip.

“Oh, I’ll manage, somehow…” he breathed, pulling her back up to him for another kiss.