#and i care too much about Override to write while feeling anxious rushed and a wee bit resentful

[yukipri]

hello! I have a question about the prime override. I really love the premise and all the world/culture-building you’re doing, but I’m also wondering about the future of the fic. it started out in one space and time, but now seems to be building up to a complete canon rewrite. is that where you see this going? or will we be going “back” to the post-war situation on Mandalore soon-ish? love it either way, but I’m just curious

First of all, thank you for being respectful and understanding in asking your question. I have gotten so many variations of "hurry up and get back to the present" regarding The Prime Override that it has admittedly severely cut into my enjoyment of writing the fic as a whole.

I am incredibly sorry that the flashback arc has felt like a "canon rewrite" though. I have been trying to build multiple sub-plots that are not remotely present (I assume) in canon, and while of course some core events happen, my intention is to only include them when they serve an explicit purpose within the unique plot of the Override. I also wanted to explore events like Muunilist, Jabiim, and Rattatak in greater depth because they are all from specific Legends contexts where there isn't much detail covered in any official media. But if it has all seemed like a simple canon rewrite, then that's probably my lack of writing skill, and I apologize for that.

The future of the fic? I'll continue writing it for as long as it brings me joy to do so. I know where I'm going and what I'm building towards. But at the same time, this fic is in many ways more about the journey than the destination. I already showed the destination in the first chapter, after all. For me, it's more importantly a deep exploration into who Jango and the clones are, their motivations and how their history and culture shaped that, and the process that Jango goes through which is almost a prose-shaped dissertation of one theory I have about how the chips and O66 worked. I, the writer, am working out these details and having discoveries along with the characters.

So to reiterate: I do know where we're going. I don't know exactly how we're getting there, and working that out through writing is what's fun for me. I therefore do not know how long it will take to get to certain places. To be fully honest, I don't even know what the next chapter will cover until I've finished the chapter before it. I didn't expect the current flashback to be so long, but there was more I needed to say and that lead to even more things, so here we are. I think it's still moving forward at a decent pace?

I will say that it won't be one solid block of time from the current flashback all the way to the present. I am currently planning (subject to change) to go back to the present once we reach the deployment of the main GAR point in the timeline—that is, after the Alphas are recalled to Kamino, and before the 212th deploys with Cody as the Marshal Commander and "Blue" within their number. I don't know how long we will be in the present after that. But after a bit, we'll go back to the past again, this time with the 212th.

I do not have chapter estimates for any of these—it'll happen when it happens.

I hope this info helps! Thank you for reading and for enjoying my work.

❀ ❀ Send YukiPri an Ask! ❀ ❀

[imjusttpeachy]

she's a rae of sunshine (c.h.)

okay so this was a request but i completely read it wrong so i’m gonna write it again but i finished this one anyway so here take it

so sorry to the anon who requested it bc u were so fuckin sweet i’ll have it up asap i promise

playlist

ralph castelli - morning sex

crumb - bones

jorja smith - teenage fantasy

summary: balancing college life and wanting to support your best friends online endeavors was difficult, but reader regrets trying a little harder when she finally meets one of her newer stream-mates

word count: 2, 828

WARNINGS: she/her pronouns used, coarse language, lowkey OOC Corpse, that needs its own warning i’m sorry,

•••

“Look you knew I had to stream before I said you could come over ya fuckin idiot.”

“Yea I knowwwww, I just wanted to spend more time with my super-hot best friend forever.”

Being the best friend of an online personality had its perks— the amazing trips you got to hitch a ride on, the adoring fans that seemed to latch on to you as well, the sponsorships that would always send you something along with the original PR package, and especially the way she was able to choose their own work hours.

Well... mostly.

As much as you adored spending time together during the day, whether it be shopping or going out for brunch, those late nights that always seemed to hold the most memories you held so dear were few and far between. Of course, you couldn’t blame her; responsibilities were responsibilities, and fuck if you’d let your selfish wants override the way she chooses to get her work done. You really couldn’t be one to judge either-- having to call off dates because you’d underestimated the time you needed to complete a school paper, or when a last-minute lab was called in and you’d have to leave her sitting alone in those cafes with your half-finished mocha and a promise to Venmo her the money to cover it later. What left you feeling the most guilty, though, was the fact that you weren’t able to watch her content as much as you’d like to. Sure, you’d catch a few minutes of a stream here and there but any time you spent apart was usually spent with your head buried in a book, mind bleary with countless espresso shots trying to keep your tired eyes focused on the seemingly unending work in front of you.

But, a distraction every now and then couldn’t hurt. Right?

Having had enough of your current assignment, any coherent thought was long gone, you’d decided to pay your favourite person a little visit. You knew she’d probably be busy as she hadn’t replied to your previous text for a few hours, but knowing her presence alone and any passing comments would lift the heaviness that had found its home in your head and chest, you shot her a message to let her know that her office couch would be occupied by you for the next few hours. Normally, you’d just show up so you knew she wouldn’t have a problem with it; so when that fateful message popped up on your phone giving you the go-ahead you completely ignored the warning of her work schedule and drove right over.

So now here you were, sprawled haphazardly on her couch clad in sweats and a sports bra scrolling through your phone as you watched her finish her final touches so she could start her stream.

“You’re gonna be in the background of my face cam if you wanna sit there y’know.” Groaning in response to her warning not wanting to move from the comfy spot you just found, you looked over at her with the best puppy eyes you could muster. She chuckled softly, raising her hands in surrender as she turned back to her setup. “Hey I really don’t care, just warning ya bug. The thirst comments and screenshots are outta my hands.”

Scoffing under your breath at her comment, you turned your head back to your phone as a Twitter notification popped up at the top of your screen.

Corpse Husband: streaming among us in a few mins, join in on youtube

Heartbeat picking up slightly, you scrambled for the purse you’d thrown at the base of the couch for your headphones. Ever since you’d found this handsome-voiced stranger’s channel on your late night horror binges, you had fallen completely in love. While you weren’t typically the type to watch video game commentary outside of Rae, his voice got you completely hooked and you couldn’t get enough of it. Yeah, maybe you were a bit of a simp, but that sweet and genuine personality that hid behind that gravelly tone had you melting completely into his clutches. You tried to convince yourself to get over it, you didn’t even know what he looked like. But, y’know, a little crush wouldn’t hurt anybody right?

“Going live in T-minus 30 seconds babe.” Jumping slightly as Rae’s voice knocked you out of dreamland, you mumbled out a small “got it” as you once again got focused on getting your headphones connected to your phone. You’d never been able to watch one of his lives before, his horror commentary videos usually playing as background noise as you did schoolwork or while you were falling asleep. Practically shaking with excitement, you opened your YouTube app seeing the live at the very top and tapping on it immediately only to be met with that sweet laugh ringing through your headphones like music to your ears. You grinned to yourself, grabbing the throw pillow you had previously tossed to the floor and hugging it to your chest while your eyes remained glued to your phone screen, completely forgetting what was happening around you as you zeroed in on the gravelly tone you’d fallen oh-so in love with.

“Hey (Y/N) wave hi.” You startled slightly as the faint voice of your friend sounded from across the room. Glancing up from your phone, you pulled an earbud from your ear and furrowed your brows at her before slowly processing what she said, lifting a hand in greeting to her watchers. She laughed at your confusing antics, turning slightly in her chair to look over at you. “What the hell are you so smiley about?”

“…Nothing..” You grinned widely as her laugh once again resounded around the room, shaking her head at you before turning back to her screen with a scoff, muttering something under her breath so only her watchers could hear. Smile still plastered across your lips, you settled back down into the comfiness of the couch and popped your earbud back in, zeroing in again on the screen in front of you. Watching as Corpse moved his character around the lobby as he waited for his friends to join, a small giggle escaped from under your breath; trying your best to be mindful of Rae’s stream but not being able to hold back the flustered feeling welling up in your chest, mind giddy with the thought of finally being able to see one of his famous live streams, well, live. It had only been a few seconds later when you heard Rae’s voice once again, only this time, not as muffled as before.

“What’s up motherfuckers.” Brows furrowing in confusion, you lifted your hand to your earbud and pulled it from your ear once again, hearing her voice from across the room but from your other earbud as well. No, there was no fucking way. All your questions were answered, though, as you glanced back down at your phone screen seeing a red character move around the game lobby along with Corpse’s, the gamer tag ‘Valkyrae’ floating just above it. Blinking hard at your screen trying to convince yourself that your eyes were lying to you, you slowly pulled your hand to cover your mouth in shock. How… How could you possibly not know they knew each other? With the way they spoke to each other in sarcastic comments, poking fun at the other it sounded like they were close too. Body finally catching up with your thoughts, you scrambled at your phone, shaky hands moving as quickly as they could to pull up your texts with Rae. Your fingers tapped furiously at the screen, anxious to get back to the live stream to listen in more but also needing to know what the fuck was going on.

TO my rae of sunshine: care to explain what the fuck is going on??! how the fuck do you know corpse husband?????!??!

“Oops sorry guys, guess I forgot to turn off my phone ringer-“ Staring up at the back of her head helplessly, you watched as she picked up her phone seeming to read out the text before bursting into a peal of laughter. Tossing a look at you over her shoulder, you looked back down at your phone bashfully, seeing the three loading dots in your message thread indicating that she was messaging you back.

my rae of sunshine: lol what about it? you gotta crush on him or something?

TO my rae of sunshine: …no

Hitting send you rushed back to the stream, anxious to see what Corpse was saying in response to Rae’s absence, not thinking anything about your brief conversation and thinking you would discuss it after she had logged off for the night. Though, as you heard her phone chime again from across the room followed by another bark of laughter, you knew you weren’t getting off that easy.

“What are you laughing about?” Corpse’s honeyed voice sounded from your earbud, hearing Rae’s giggles from what you presumed to be their discord voice chat. Glancing anxiously between his stream and the reflection of Rae’s face cam in one of her monitors, your heart began to sink as you watched that familiar mischievous grin tugging at the edge of her lips.

“Oh just my friend (Y/n) sent me a funny meme”

“Wait, is she the one in some of your Instagram posts?” You swear your heart stopped beating at that moment, eyes glued to the screen in front of you as you tried helplessly to process the conversation happening right in front of you. He knew who you were? You thought you’d always be lost among the hundreds of thousands of his new adoring fans, left in the anonymity of your Twitter tag in his subtweets, or just another subscriber that fawned over him silently behind a keyboard. Knowing that he’d actually seen your face you could feel your own beginning to heat at that moment; you brought your hands your mouth again, unknowingly curling your body tighter around the pillow in your lap as you tried to hide your face behind it as you become more and more flustered from the words nonchalantly escaping his mouth.

“Yea that’s her, pretty thing isn’t she? She’s my absolute favourite.”

That’s it, you were gonna fucking kill her.

“I mean, yeah... I guess..” The timid words followed by a soft awkward chuckle had your breath hitching in your throat. There was no fucking way this was happening. This had to be a dream, that was the only possible explanation. You were just about to pinch yourself when Rae’s voice startled you from your thoughts.

“She’s actually over right now. She insisted on getting wine drunk later tonight because her professor’s been on her ass lately. I’ll get her to come say hi.” Rae had barely turned around in her chair when she was met with your wide-eyed gaze, panic painted across your features as you shook your head wildly. You were in no state to be talking to your long-time internet crush in such a casual setting. But with the look Rae shot you from her chair as she started to plug another headset into her PC, you knew you had no choice and begrudgingly pulled yourself from the couch almost tripping over your own feet as you shakily walked over to Rae. Shooting her another pleading look, she only shoved the headset in your direction in return as she grinned up at you. Finally biting the bullet, you pulled on the headset and leaned down toward the mic.

“Hi, how’s it going?” Cursing at yourself for how quiet and shaky your words came out, you barely had any time to think it over before a chorus of greetings sounded through the headset. A small giggle escaped your lips as you watched the different Discord icons appear and disappear from the top of the screen. You knew most of these people already which made you even more confused as to how you managed to miss that voice from all the discord chats and voice calls. Well, knowing them was a bit of an overstatement anyway; you knew /of/ them, and they knew /of/ you in the other times you popped up in the background or in passing conversation during Rae’s streams. They did know you well enough, though, to know this was not the way you usually spoke around them.

“No way, that can’t be the (Y/N) I know!” The voice you recognize as Sean echoes through your headset, another chorus of knowing laughter following quickly after. Taking a deep breath you managed to force out a few words that would get them off your case.

“…Shut the fuck up”

“There she is!!” As the group erupted in laughter yet again, all you could focus on was the faint deep chuckle that resounded through your headset. Feeling your face start to heat up, you covered your wide grin with your hand as butterflies burst through your stomach; you could listen to that laugh all day. Before you were able to speak again, though, that heavenly voice piped up and wiped all train of thought from your mind.

“Nice to meet you (Y/N).”

“It’s nice to meet you too Corpse. I gotta be honest ‘n say I’m a pretty big fan of your no-sleep work.” And... there’s the word vomit. Fuck, you could feel your cheeks starting to heat up with the ongoing realization of who you were talking to.

“Aha thank you, I uh really appreciate that. I’m sure you just heard, but I guess you could say I’m a fan of yours also.”

No.

No, there’s no fucking way.

Is he...

Flirting with you?

Before you could even think about what to reply to that with, the rest of the group beat you to it.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what is happening.”

“CORPSE! You SIMP!”

“Is- Is Corpse really shooting his shot right now?”

You didn’t realize you were frozen in place until you felt Rae’s hand on your elbow, snapping you out of your bewildered trance as you tried to comprehend what was happening yourself. As your thoughts finally caught up to the present, you could feel your cheeks start to burn; pulling your hand up to cover your face you stepped out of the view of the face cam. Rae’s laughter filled the room as she watched your flustered antics, shooting you a sly grin as she started scanning the monitor displaying her live chat.

“Wait, wait, chats telling me (y/n)’s blushing right now?” Sean’s voice echoed through the discord chat, only making you flush further as you tried desperately to find a way out of this.

“Okay, okay, leave her alone.” Corpse’s voice finally piped up amid all of the chaos causing everyone to immediately pipe down. God, you didn’t even want to begin to think of the mess this has already made, you just needed to get out of there before you caused any more damage.

“Yeah, I uh- see- see that the lobby’s full so I’ll just uh- leave you guys to it.” Quietly thanking the stars that Corpse finally got you out of this mess, you went to pull the headset off your ears when that fateful voice piped up again.

“Wait, don’t let these nerds make you leave. You should stay- I mean, only to help Rae y'know? She needs it.”

“I do not!”

“I- I mean yea sure, as long as I’m not intruding,” Cursing yourself again for stuttering before forcing yourself to swallow the knot in your throat, “I mean, she really does need the help.”

“Okay just because you want to flirt some more doesn’t mean you can bully me-“

“Okay, I’m starting the round!” The booming accented voice cut off everyone else in the call as you all stared as the screen began to count down to the game, and before anyone had the chance to say anything else a chorus of laughs resounded, and then the lobby fell into silence.

•••

And it went on like that, the not-so-subtle flirting followed by relentless jabs from the group immediately after. The game was almost forgotten with how much of each lobby was taken up by teasing words and endless laughter, but every audience was just eating it up. You didn’t even want to think about the mess social media was going to be after this stream but right now you were having fun with your friends and that’s all that mattered. The grin was practically plastered on your face as you laughed along with Rae the chat during the gameplay portions and you knew everything from this moment on was gonna be different, but you couldn’t find a single thing within you to care.

Especially when you logged onto Twitter right after the stream and saw that little message right at the top of your requests.

@.corpsehusband: wanna hear some of that no sleep work in person?

•••

beep bop here u go,

[daydreamindollie]

𝟘𝟞.𝟘𝟞.𝟚𝟘 ⏤𝙠𝙤𝙛𝙞 + 𝙥𝙬𝙩𝙪𝙝 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬

Alright, so...I'm going to be leaving home to survive out in the big world later this year and will be entering university as an undergraduate for Biomedical Sciences.

I'm also not going to be openly looking for work seeing as my parents want me to focus on my studies and, to be honest, I feel the same way. But one thing's for sure, I want to continue writing even though my brother, who is already in university, told me I won't be able to write or, at least, plan chapters/oneshots as much as I'm able to now.

Umm...this is really uncomfortable for me to say because I really do love writing and going through the planning process of it all so I don't want it to seem as if I'll be doing it for money. However, I still want to be able to fund myself in some way that I can avoid being anxious or stressed about my funds as much as possible in the future whilst I'm in further education.

The main reason I'm bringing this up now is because this is the only time I'm feeling confident enough to bring the topic up of me making a kofi account. If I don't do it now then maybe I never will. Either that or I may already be stressing out from my debt due to university loans.

If any of you are willing to buy me a kofi, here's the page I just created but please bear in mind that you are not obligated to buy me anything in any way if you are not in a position to, also if you're not 16-18, please ask permission from your parents or don't at all! - really! You don't have to! Only if you're able to and want to.

✚           ✚           ✚

Anyway! Moving on! I have a little preview for PWTUH chapter 12 for you and a little peep into the written plans I've written up already :3

Just quickly! Please note that the preview may or may not make it into the final, revised, and edited chapter 12 that I will be posting officially for pwtuh as it will be edited and possibly changed by then. Still! Please enjoy it for what it is!

↓ also, know that these are just random, unedited scenes and may be shuffled up in the final, edited version of chapter 12 ↓

Unexpectedly, news of the war didn't daunt the people of Seoul. Even in your village, small and suburban, had little worries over the matter. In one ear, they were fully aware of their king's illness, and in the other, they were the victims of propaganda. Word of the victory at --- seemed to have blinded them to the sovereign's frail state, a condition that leaves him incapable of leading the kingdom on the backs of the first and second commanders' achievements and potential losses on the battlefield. That would be the only thing he would have been able to do had his illness not taken a turn for the worse. If his highness was in a better state of health, he would have bravely taken himself to the field and fought alongside the people of his country. Alas, the world forbid him from doing so in the cruelest way possible. You can still remember the breakable appearance of his majesty when embellishing his quarters with the most brilliant of blossoms and it made your heart thump heavily with trepidation.

If only the prince returns, then you're certain you'd be able to feel an ounce of reassurance.

"Is everything alright, (Y/N)?" Jeong whispers from beside you, his close proximity, if it were any other day, would have flustered you beyond belief but it had no such effect when your mind was racing the way it was.

"I...I'm just..-worried..." you hummed fretfully, leaning into his chest as you stared on at Taehyung and Jimin chattering the day away and neglecting their duties at the assembly station of your shop. You dare not break their lighthearted banter in spite of the blatant negligence of their tasks, seeing as this could one day be a rare sight for you.

"About...?"

With a sigh, you close your eyes for several beats of silence before you tilt your head to face Jeong and voice your worries, "well...uhh," despite your prodigious anxiety, the heat of embarrassment rushing to your cheeks was overwhelming and you had to push yourself away from the male who you had been so so close - once again - to touching lips with. For a moment, you regain your senses and calm your reddened cheeks, however, the amount of time it had taken you to achieve that, Jeong was, once again, staring off into space.

Eyes distant and mind unreachable, your eyes furrow in additional concern. He's been like this since this morning. Was he just as worried as you were about the war? You smile softly at his potential sentiment, at the very least, you're glad that he isn't one to be indifferent to pressing matters. Certainly, you needed a man like that around Taehyung.

A man. Your cheeks blossom a soft pink once more. Jeong has certainly grown into himself as a man over the months that you've been by his side, there was no denying that. You're eager to see if he sees you as a woman as well.

✚           ✚           ✚

Wanting nothing more than to rid yourself of the horrible, pressing feeling that had suddenly swept over you, you make the woeful excuse of visiting Jin at the bakery in order to purchase something for lunch. If you stay a moment longer, you're deathly afraid of sinking deeper into that frightful feeling.

"But…" Jungkook pauses to ensure his reasoning was true, "you already prepared lunch for us home at home,"

You're quick to correct your grave mistake, "I mean, for desert after lunch…yeah!" you bite your inner cheek at the thought of the adverse effects of the sugar in Jin's baked goodies, "I’ve been craving something sweet and I think" unconsciously, in spite of your distaste for sugar, your gaze wanders outside to where the boys are pretending to be knights. The way they valiantly swing their floral swords was so admirable and charming, you had to hold back a giggle, "…I think the boys will want something to cheer them up because of all this conflict - they’re brilliant liars but I can see right through them," with a sigh and smiles directed at Jeong you make your request, "please look after the shop while I’m gone,"

"You’re right," he smiles and nods, "I’ll do that,"

For a moment, you marvel at his sweet smile before snapping out of it - had his smile always been that captivating? - and bashfully heading out, "Boys, I’ll be going out for a bit! I’ll be back as soon as I can okay?"

"Okay, Noona! Take care!" Taehyung and Jimin raise their hands to wave you goodbye before they quickly make a split-second demand "Hugs and Kisses" their toothy, adorable grins are too much for you to resist so you happily oblige with a grin of your own, unaware of the smiling male staring on from within your flower shop. His smile, however, slowly but quickly falls into a frown as his head fills with overriding thoughts once more.

From the precious smiles and pure scene he had witnessed, Jungkook is now faced with even more dread, knowing that he needs to return in order to protect you fully and take charge of the operations. He knows that growth should never be rushed - another lesson taught to him by his father - yet he wishes that he could return to being prince Jungkook as soon as possible even if it meant leaving you. He needs to protect your smile and the dearest memories he was able to make here thanks to you and Taehyung.

He has to. He needs to. No matter the cost.

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here is a pic of my written plans, you may get a little hint of what’s to come if you squint annnddddd...I also drew fanart! (it’s from one of the last scene in chapter 12 - wink wonk ;3) I am not an artist! and I used some pre-existing art to trace over, I made some changes but I’ll still credit the artists when I find the artworks again bc I. FORGOT. TO. SAVE. THEM!!!!

Anyway, I’ll be unblurring unpixelating the art in the official post of pwtuh chapter 12 as well as crediting the artists + putting in the artwork beside the little manga strip I made using them. HAVE FUNNNN! 

[emphoenixcat]

I have a writing prompt if that’s okay? I’m asking different writers and would like to see your take on it. It’s that while Logan is Thomas’ Logic, he is also his anger. This has already been debunked in canon, but I still love the idea. So, all it is, is Logan hiding and suppressing his anger, thinking it is hurtful and completely bad. And it turns self destructive, and into the others finding out (the easy or the hard way? Him shouting?) and helping him through it. - 🖤🐲

^^^Interesting. I’d like to see how other people decided to write this kind of story

Warnings: Self-destructive behavior, cutting, self-hate.

Logan was well aware that the Sides were complex beings.

Nobody was just one thing.

Patton was not just happy feelings, he was the core of all feelings.

Roman was not just dreams and creation, he was nightmares and destruction.

Virgil was not just anxiety and fear, he was protection and self-preservation.

But what was Logan? Was he just Logic? Or was there something more to him than that?

Everyone else’s faults and virtues were closely linked to what their purpose was. It was like smaller aspects of personalities fighting to keep balance in Thomas’ mind, even if that balance came at a greater cost.

Logan was Logic, but he had his faults. The same as all the others, he had another side to him. Another presence that haunted his part of the mindscape.

Anger.

But why do I abet anger? Wouldn’t that be Anxiety’s burden? Or even Morality’s?

Perhaps, it was because Logan was the persona that fought the most.

While Creativity fought quite literal monsters, Logic fought for what he felt was right.

Logical arguments fueled by fire. It made him more passionate in arguments, but that also made Logic flawed.

He was faulty.

And that was the main reason why Logan hid that side of himself from the others. Not only was it a difficult thing to control, but it made him feel like a failure.

Every now and then, he would accidentally let out an aggravated shout during an argument. He would have to fight to calm himself during debates, but it was difficult to keep himself from slipping.

It had been increasingly exhausting to hold it back when they had visited Patton’s room.

Feelings, Logan thought with great distaste.

He had had to make a hasty retreat. He would have just made the situation worse if he had stayed in there any longer.

Logan was no fool though, he knew that he needed an outlet for the rage. He did not want it to harm any of the others though.

Not Roman.

Not Virgil.

Not Patton.

Not Thomas.

He thought it was best to direct it at himself.

It was his burden to carry, he couldn’t drag the others into it when they had their own responsibilities to worry about.

Nobody suspected what actually went on in the logical side’s room. They all figured that Logan didn’t like to be bothered because he was working on important projects and experiments.

In reality, Logan would rush to his room after particularly distressing discussions and the room would swirl around him. Books, papers, pencils, beakers, and flasks would fly around Logan like a tornado. Glass smashing violently against the walls.

He had looked in the mirror a few times, his eyes burned red during these scenarios.

Luckily, the Sides’ rooms were soundproof or else Logan’s secret would’ve been uncovered a long time ago.

Calm down! Calm down! Logan would tell himself.

It never worked.

He felt the fury building inside, threatening to consume all reason. Struggling to possess him.

It went on like that for awhile until Logan discovered something that would temporarily silence his rage

Pain.

It would override the other feeling enough for him to take control again.

Logan would grab a razorblade or piece of glass (whichever was nearest) and carefully cut the scars into his stomach.

He couldn’t really explain it, the irrational emotion of relief that would flood over him as he watched the blood slowly ooze out of the cuts.

Fascinating.

It was a day like any other, the Sides were taking turns choosing a fun activity. It was Roman’s turn and he wanted to take the others down to his mindscape to enjoy an afternoon of sunshine.  

“It will be such an adventure! You guys really need to see the lake at this time of the year. Simply gorgeous!” the prince was saying.

Patton smiled, “Maybe we could all go for a swim!”

“What a splendid idea, Pat.”

Virgil grimaced, “I don’t care for swimming.”

“Of course you don’t” Roman rolled his eyes and turned to Logan.

“What do you think?”

Logan didn’t care for the idea at all, but he knew he couldn’t win the argument. It was Roman’s day to choose and the prince would be very pouty if he didn’t get his way.

“I guess we could all go spend time by the lake, but I’m with Virgil on this one. I am not much of a swimmer.”

“Wow, you two are just the life of the party” Roman muttered sarcastically.

In Roman’s room, they were surrounded by sweltering afternoon heat. The forest was abuzz with birds and insects, as the Sides made their way to the lake. Patton was skipping joyously ahead with Roman leading the way, Logan and Virgil bringing up the rear.

Logan glanced at Virgil, who was glumly suffering in his heavy hoodie.

“Um, Virge?”

“Don’t. Don’t tell me, I know I should take the jacket off. I’m not going to. I’m not,” Virgil said firmly.

Logan let out a huff of annoyance. I was only trying to help.

They came upon the lake, it’s surface was cool and inviting. Roman immediately conjured up some swimming gear for everyone in case Logan or Virgil changed their minds.

Patton grabbed Logan’s wrist and pulled him forward, “Why don’t you guys come and swim? It’s like over a hundred degrees here.”

The logical side withdrew from Patton, getting irritated. “No, go on without me. I am perfectly content just sitting here.”

“Please?” Patton pleaded with big, round puppy-looking eyes. “At least dip your feet in. I don’t want to see you suffering from the heat. That means you too, Virge” Patton said sternly.

Virgil sighed and obligingly zapped himself into the swim trunks that Roman had provided. His hooded jacket was still wrapped around him, he looked a bit ridiculous.

But apparently Patton approved of the anxious side’s transition. He glanced back at Logan expectantly.

Logan crossed his arms and mirrored Virgil’s actions. He kept his polo shirt and tie on as he instantly changed into the dark blue swim trunks.

Virgil sniggered at the other’s outfit.

“What are you laughing about? You look just as weird as I do.”

“Oh, but I make this work”

“I expect this out of Virgil, but not out of you. Really, what is the problem?” Patton asked.

“Nothing. I’m simply not comfortable.”

Patton frowned, “But we’re all the same.”

Logan straightened his glasses nervously, “Well, technically….”

He fumbled with his tie and smoothed down his shirt, trying not to look Patton in the eye.

Patton tilted his head, confused.

“Look, it isn’t anything we haven’t seen before, kiddo.”

Logan shook his head.

Patton sighed and they proceeded walking to the lake. Logan and Virgil sat on the edge, their legs dangling in the water while Roman and Patton jumped in.

Virgil smirked as he splashed the prince in the face. Roman retaliated much to Virgil’s dismay.

“Hey, my hoodie!”

“Your own fault” Roman chuckled.

Patton was mischievously sneaking up on Logan, he grabbed the logical side’s ankle and pulled. Logan was fully submerged.

His shirt floated up as he was dragged down, Patton let go. The moral side had a close-mouthed smile on his face as he began to resurface, but paused when he saw something. Something on Logan’s stomach.

As they both broke through the surface of the lake, Patton questioned the logical side.

“Wha–what was that?”

Logan looked exasperated as he combed the wet hair away from his face and cleaned his soaked glasses. “What was what?” he snapped.

“On your stomach.”

Logan froze.

“I’ve got to go. I’ve got to go now.”

And with that the logical side returned to his room.

Patton and the others followed.

The logical side’s room was an utter disaster and getting worse. Objects moved as if a poltergeist inhabited the residence.

Roman screamed as a book nearly struck him in the head. Virgil inched backward. Patton took a tentative step deeper into the mindscape.

“Logan?”

“Get out.”

Patton and the others shuddered at the warped voice. I thought only Virgil’s voice got like that.

“What’s wrong? Let us help you” the moral side tried again, still moving towards Logan.

Logan was rummaging around his desk for something, “You can’t help. Go.”

“But we need to know. We need to know what’s going on.”

Patton gasped in shock as the logical side turned to face him.

Logan’s eyes were completely red, no pupil to be seen. It was like it wasn’t even him. It was as if he were possessed by a demon.

The red-eyed Logan grinned, and Patton saw with dawning horror that he was holding a blade.

“Patton!” Roman yelled. “Watch out!” Virgil added as the anxious side carefully moved forward to get Patton to safety.

Instead of trying to hurt Patton though, the crazed Logan took the blade and etched a new mark on his stomach.

Everything in the room became utterly silent as the objects that had been hurtling wildly around them stopped abruptly as if the place itself was holding its breath.

Logan continued in concentration as if the others weren’t there.

His eyes were transitioning back to the way they normally were. Back to the way they should be.

As he broke out of his daze, all the items simultaneously clattered haphazardly to the floor.

Nobody spoke.

They just took in the destruction that lay around them.

In the midst of it all was Logan, still clutching the razorblade like a lifeline while streams of blood became more visible through his shirt.

“I–I’m sorry” he managed.

Virgil spoke next, “I think you owe us more than an apology. What just happened?”

Logan bowed his head in shame, “I have another side to me. I’m not just Logic.”

He glanced up and saw the confusion.

“Anger….also resides here.”

“You didn’t think that that was important information to share with us!” Roman was understandably upset.

“I thought I could handle it on my own.”

“And how’s that working out for ya?”

Logan glared at the prince, feeling like he might’ve had another flare up if it wasn’t for his fresh wounds.

“I know how to take care of it. You guys weren’t supposed to follow me.”

Patton finally spoke, “I–is that how?” He pointed to Logan’s stomach with a trembling finger.

The logical side nodded.

Roman grimaced, “Why would you do that to yourself?”

“It’s the only way the Anger will go away. I have to direct it at someone or something. I don’t want to direct it at you guys.”

“Wait? So you direct it at yourself?” Virgil asked.

“Y–yeah.”

“There has to be something else you can do….”

“No. If I do anything else, I risk being faulty logic. I have to protect Thomas from that.”

Patton was shaking his head, droplets forming in his eyes. “We’re not letting you hurt yourself again.”

Logan stared at Patton, “But I am imperfect. I have to be perfect. I have to function properly for Thomas…..and for you guys.”

Virgil, Roman, and Patton all glanced at each other.

“Lo….there’s no such thing as perfection. We’re all here just trying our best, we can’t do that if we don’t work together on things.” Patton reassured him.

“You have to trust us on this. Please tell us next time. Let us know when you’re becoming angry. When you need space or when you need comfort.”

Logan slowly nodded his head. Maybe….maybe that would work.

The Sides came together to comfort him and Logan smiled.

Maybe with their help, Logic wouldn’t be so faulty.