#and i Really wanna live in nyc. i love it there I've loved it there since the first time I visited

[musette22]

https://x.com/marcmaron/status/1843009639748964632?t=Pm1LPxzHxY9a9kYoVmluAQ&s=19 this podcast is out and damn, it's so interesting. I felt like Seb said things that he never mentioned before. For example, his dad was like a hero back in his birth city because he helped many people leave the country illegally when communism was still happening. He also said his dad left the country in the mid 80s (he was a 3 yo baby!! :() and then talked about how his mom left after the romanian revolution and then she came back for him a year later so he has abandonment issues (I was about to cry!). When he was asked if he lives in NYC, he said that now is a bi coastal thing between NYC and LA. Talked about how he's had people "fans" at his place in NYC. Basically confirming again that he's not coming back to Instagram because basically he doesn't wanna know about people who assume things about him when they don't know him at all. He said his mom cooks Romanian food on Christmas and that she thinks he's aging quickly (I ugly laughed) but she's super proud of him. He also said "God bless she is" because he had just said that both his dad and step dad are gone now. He said he doesn't have family or friends in Romania any longer because they're all gone. He talked about his step dad too and he said he was a big important part of his life :3 talked about how he started to work when he was in high school. About his mom having a heavy Romanian accent and he still knows the language because she always speaks to him in Romanian. And of course he spoke about his job in the apprentice and a different man. A really good podcast, I recommend it 🙂‍↕️

Aaahhh thank you so much for this, darling!! I am bad at keeping up with interviews and I particularly struggle with podcasts, but I do want to know every thing Sebastian has ever said, so this is super nice to read, thank you!! I hope I'll get around to it sometime, but if not, at least now I've got this 🫶🏼

Some of these things are familiar or not surprising, but you're right, a lot of this he's rarely or never talled about before 🥺 Everything he said about his parents, my goodness ❤️ My heart goes out to him so much, I'm so sorry he had to lose two father figures, but I'm so glad he still has his mom and they're as close as ever! And I think it's incredibly brave and important that he speaks so openly both about his difficult youth and about his views on social media and privacy. We love a man who never forgets where he came from, or what matters and what doesn't! I admire him so, so much 💘

Linking the postcast here, for anyone who wnats to give it a listen!

[hai7ani]

Hiii no one asked but here's a list of movies i think more people should watch/know about:

It's not that these are necessarily great. i have not much to say about them except i think they are really eye-opening and great for understanding different dynamics especially for me who is still exploring the world

His Three Daughters

On Netflix / notable actors: Elizabeth Olsen, Natasha Lyonne

A movie about three daughters who come together in their father's NYC apartment to look after their dying father. Eldest sister who has issues especially with her own daughter and never trusting for everything, middle sister who hates conflict and is way too kind and friendly to everyone, and the youngest sister (adopted) who smokes marijuana and bets on sports games all day with her boyfriend, that never speaks up for herself. Their father listens while on bedrest as his daughters fight with each other constantly in the room next to him, about everything that was bottled and pent up in their chest over the years. The movie ends with the youngest sister adding on to the middle sister's singing, "Daddy duck said beep, beep, beep, beeeeeep. And all those crazy little ducks came back."

my thoughts: 👍🏻 good movie to watch if u wanna wash ur eyes lol like. Really washing it with tears

18x2 Beyond Youthful Days (青春18)

On Netflix / notable actors: Greg Hsu (许光汉)

A man and his first love who is a Japanese solo traveler. They met in his hometown of Tainan in Taiwan and fell in love when she started working at the local karaoke to earn some money before moving onto the next part of her journey, but she left soon after with the promise of seeing each other again when they each achieve their goals in the future. Their love didn't advance, and years later when he is fired from his own company due to behavioural reasons, he returns home in Tainan to find an old postcard from his first love. So, he embarks on a journey to visit her hometown in Japan, nicknamed a trip without a destination.

my thoughts: lol like the many people (my irl friends) who watched i hated the ending because it was insane. and i've always liked the countryside boy x new to this place girl trope it's so 🤍🤍🤍

Us and Them (后来的我们)

On Netflix / notable actors: Zhou Dongyu (周冬雨), Jing Boran (井柏然)

A movie about a man and a woman who meets again on a flight years after separating and spending their winter days reminiscing on their past. The movie brings us through their story during every Chinese New Year that they are still in love. They met when he was still a university student aspiring to be a video game creator and she is just, well, her. They break up in adulthood while they're both working hard to make a living for themselves. She has always wanted to marry a man and live in a big house, and he's always tried his hardest to make her dream come true some day. But fights happen, tensions arise, and suddenly they're no longer together anymore. He did chase after her to the train station when they fought back then, and the present her had asked him when they meet again, "if you've had the courage to step on the train with me, I would've stayed with you forever." Yeah, obviously he didn't manage to do so back then.

my thoughts: one of my favourite movies ever please watchhh it's so good

Let's Talk About Chu (爱爱内涵光)

Netflix TV series (8 episodes) / notable actors: Kai Ko (柯震东)

Eldest sister Qiu Wei who struggles with intimacy with her husband who seems a little bit too distant lately and having issues dealing with her traditional, over-bearing mother that keeps on insisting she has kids, despite agreeing with her husband that they wouldn't like to have any and deliberately taking contraceptives, which is why she hasn't been getting pregnant despite her mother's best efforts on boiling her herbal soups. Eldest son Qiu Yu Sen who is gay and takes part in dangerous underground gambling activites, and develops a complicated relationship with the casino manager. Youngest daughter Qiu Ai (the MC) who runs a sex-education channel that helps women understand sex and self-pleasure better, while emphasising on her motto of only having sex without love, while at the same time is struggling on her relationship with long-term fuck buddy, Zhou Ping Ke. Their father who gets caught masturbating to porn by his wife in their bedroom, that ends with their yearly family reunion dinner a few nights later in a mess when his wife erupts.

my thoughts: 柯震东你好帅 😭 one of the series that really focuses on each character's stories and development. A lot happens in this that surrounds sex, and it also really opened my eye on how Taiwan is a very open-minded country. I've heard lots about Taiwan of course and i even visited taipei this july but this series really did the final blow. the first time i watched i loved Qiu Ai's story, and then the second time i decided i liked Qiu Wei's more. Really great watch!

I'll add more if i have any, but here's all so far :>>> lmk if any of you decide to watch and what u think of them! *also keep in mind 3/4 listed are chinese/taiwanese lol u will need subtitles if you don't understand mandarin

[i-miss-summertime]

What's your Ianthony Orville Peck song analysis!? And I'd be interested in any other Ianthony song analysis pieces you want to share too!

anon, i love you for enabling me <3

The song I'm obsessing over for them specifically is "How Far Will We Take It" by Orville Peck and Noah Cyrus and the lyrics are so perfect for their time apart and early reunion (beautiful song as well btw, the production is great if anyone wants to listen lol)

This verse feels based in Ian's perspective in the between years. Continuously waking up and showing up to this business that started from this crazy thing he and Anthony both created and shared.

Then the second part where it feels like it speaks to his perseverance of being able to step up with Defy shut down and became president of Smosh. Anthony and other cast continuously mention how it couldn't have survived without Ian leading the ship and by the time Anthony came around again, it was still succeeding with Ian's hard work.

Second verse feels more like Anthony coming back. As much as he loves Smosh as well, what brought him back was his love to create with Ian. It's rooted in their friendship and being able to be with Ian again feels like a major aspect of what Anthony came back for. And also the visual of Ian welcoming him back and closing the door behind him like "you're here and we're in this together for the long haul" as they literally bought a company together (still baffling if I think about it long enough lol)

Also "felt the fire but couldn't see the flames" reads to me like Anthony feeling the anger and sadness of the last years at Smosh but not able to understand his negative emotions were aimed at Defy and not Smosh/Ian until later. Like feeling the pain but not able to identify the real source.

This part of the chorus and the line "I know that you felt the same" though! Even if Ian was more resistant to talk about their feelings during the NYC trip ("cause I've been waiting, don't wanna face it", they both felt things weren't the same and they weren't as close of friends. Neither of them could break through to each other in the state they were in being overworked, unhappy, and not having the chance to grow more as people.

"We're all alone now, how far will we take it?" like they had to have time separate and see how to succeed on their own. And they both did a really good job at it! They were both able to find ways to step up and push themselves as independent creatives without being Ian-and-Anthony. But even then, still not getting the real chance to find someone who could match their energy in their comedy writing and the pure history they have with one another as childhood friends ("No getting used to living without you"). They were still soul tired, even if they were doing well, they still felt the desire to be with each other regardless of a brand or company.

Now this last variation on the chorus kills me cuz it feels like early reunion to the max, I love it!

"I tried to love you" like shipper goggles aside, its very hard for men to be able to express love for their friends and it's clearly still not natural to them but they're trying! The I love you during Anthony's funeral? Clearly a bit awkward to get out but still he said he loved his friend!

"Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna waste it/ We're all alone now how far will we take it?"

This fully reads as them going independent from Mythical after buying back Smosh. They don't want to waste it, they know they want to do this as long as they possibly can and are working so hard for Smosh to succeed together.

They're alone but now they're alone together, Ian and Anthony at the helm of the ship again, now they're seeing how far they can take it :')

[kookiekittyp4nties]

An Eventful night in

words: 3.4k

Fic summery: Billy Butcher x fem reader x Hughie. Hughie and the reader have been dating for a while and recently started sleeping together with Butcher. After the rest of the boys crew decide to go out you decide to stay back with Butcher and Hughie to get changed but that quickly turns into something much more eventful then the night you had planned.

Tags: Smut, nsfw, double penetration, Eiffel tower, vaginal fingering, rimming, anal play, anal sex, creampie, praise kink, slight degradation, blowjobs, rough oral sex, finger sucking, threesome-FMM, handjobs, rough sex, light breeding kink. overstimulation, doggystyle, manhandling, unprotected sex

Notes: i wrote this all the way back in august hehe its an oldie but still a goodie

★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★・・・・・・★

It was a cool evening in the streets of NYC and the boys were all huddled together in their base, desperately trying to figure out their next move. Amongst the frustrated silence, Frenchie spoke up. “It's late, and we've been on edge all month. Why don't we take the night off?” Had anyone walked into the room they could easily tell that the consensus was that everyone agreed. 

“It is important to take time off...” M.M agreed. “Great! How do drinks and dancing sound?!” Frenchie exclaimed. Kimiko nodded excitedly in agreement. “What about you y/n?'' Kimiko signed. “Clubbing might be fun actually. It’s been a while since I've had an excuse to dress up a bit” she grins. “Butcher? Hughie? Do you guys wanna come?” 

“Sorry love but I'm a bit tied up here at the moment.” Butcher gestures to the assortment of plans, guns and other illegal items on the table in front of him. “You feeling okay?” M.M laughs. “Because usually Butcher, you besides from Frenchie would be the first person to ditch work to go party.”  

“Yeah well, today I'm not M.M. My heads bloody killing me mate and I still have all this shit to sort out.” sensing the tension brewing Hughie chirps up i-Ill go” He enthusiastically replies, standing up so quickly he knocks the table and butcher beside him. Who shoots him a displeased look.

 “It'll take me a while to get ready so why don’t you go ahead guys and Hughie and I can hopefully in that time convince Butcher to pull the stick out his ass and come with us.”  you happily chirp. “You don't have to tell me twice mon Coeur,” Frenchie calls holding Kimiko's hand and throwing his jacket over his shoulder as he leaves, M.M trailing behind him. 

Awkward silence quickly filled the air as the other half of the group cleared out. “Well, I'm going to go change and do my makeup. Take your time finishing up with whatever this is.”You exclaim, grabbing your bag and sauntering to the bathroom winking as you close the door.

“A-Actually I need to shower too.” Hughie beams, and practically jumps to follow you.“Lad, she’s changing give her a second.” Butcher grumbles patting Hughie on the shoulder and lighting a cigarette.

It's a while before the sound of the shower stops and You walk out of the bathroom. Hughie’s eyes almost damn near fall out of his head when he sees what you’re wearing. And Butcher, for once, is at a loss for words. “Are you boys ready to leave yet?” you call bending over to re-apply her lipstick. Your short dress threatens to show your panties. 

Both men almost audibly groan as she stands on her tip ties to get a better look at her face in the mirror revealing her pink lacy panties. “While you were in the shower Hughie and I were talking and we realized that it's been a while since we have all spent time together... With this and the bullshit with Homelander and Stormfront, we haven't had any time to ourselves.”

“Hughie, baby do you really feel like that?” you stop putting on your makeup and regretfully glance at the two men on the sofa. “I mean we live together, so I guess it is easy to overlook how much we are having sex, versus how many times we attempted and fell asleep... And Butcher we see even less out of work. I’m sorry we haven't been having much fun together recently.”  

“Which is okay,” Hughie interjects quickly. “I mean, well, I am sorta, really pent up and seeing you in that dress isn't helping... But that's not to say this is our fault. If anything it's fucking Homelanders fault for making us so busy we bearly have any time to fuck, let alone do anything but worry.” Y/n’s breath hitches as she notices Hughie’s tent in his jeans. 

“He does have a point about the dress. You look fucking sexy in it. The thing is so short that if we wanted to fool around all we have to do is roll it up slightly. Which, I’m not opposed to in the slightest... I've always had a soft spot for short dresses.” he groans, grabbing Your waist. being so caught up in the moment, you hadn’t even noticed that both he and Hughie were towering over her looking down ravenously.

Shivering you experimentally grind yourself against Butcher's groin... And beckon Hughie to kiss you. “Wait, are we seriously going to do this here?” He mumbles as he pulls away. “I’m really fucking horny too but everyone is in here during the day. What will they say if they come back  tomorrow and it smells like sex?”  

“You act like it doesn't smell dubious here on the regular lad. It probably won't be noticed too much. And either way, if Frenchie of all people does say anything it's not like we haven't walked in on or seen the aftermath of this room when he’s had Kimiko peg him in here.” Hughie sheepishly nods and leans in for another kiss. “It's just a little team-building exercise…what do you say Y/n? Want me and Hughie to fuck you silly?” 

Legs trembling at his usage of words, you eagerly nod.  “Oh, Come on, you know you can do better than that.” Butcher groans, nibbling your ear and grabbing a handful of your breast. “Say it.” Hughie chimes in. “Say you want Me and Butcher to fuck you silly right here like a little slut.” By the way, butcher’s grope eases on your breast you can tell he is also surprised to hear how assertive the shorter man is being. “I- I want you and Butcher to fuck me silly.” 

“That's a good girl.” Butcher sighs, pulling your panties to the side to rub your clit.  Your eyes grow heavily lidded as you feel Butcher's thick fingers slipping between your labia. He swipes his fingers up your slit collecting all the sticky wetness before circling back to your bundle of nerves.

”Now, poor Hughie has been straining in his pants the past half hour, would you be a dear and help relive him a little before he jizzes his pants like fucking a schoolboy.” working quickly You unbutton and unzip his jeans and slips your hands into his boxers to free him from his fabric prison. You quickly take notice of how painfully hard he is. His cock throbbing and already dribbling pre down his shaft.

“Fuck,” he hisses when his cock hits the cool air of the room, Throwing his head back.“That feels good.” Butcher hums in agreement as he gently slips a finger into Y/n’s soaked pussy.”Remember, jerk him off slowly, just the way he likes it, love. That's right, thumb the tip and then drag your hand down his shaft using his precum as lube.” Hughie trembles at the stimulation and buries his face in your neck. Licking and sucking a hickey into it. He is already so sensitive, so pretty. His face is burning as he nuzzles it into you.

“Butcher….please” you moan. “Please what love? Use your words, I'm not a fucking mind reader.” he chuckles. “Please fuck me with your fingers.” you breathe out, legs starting to buckle. Your cheeks are burning in anticipation. At this point, you are practically dripping. “Sure thing y/n.” almost instantly you feel another finger slip into you and curl causing you to moan loudly and arch your back. "Fuck, your little cunny is so tight it's practically sucking me in. I can barely move." He chuckles.

“How close are you Hughie?” you exhale deeply, Quickening your stroke on his shaft. You can feel him throbbing in your hand. “Pretty, close.” he moans with half-lidded eyes, so eager for stimulation that he bucks his hips into your hand. Usually, he isn't this eager, but you can tell was as pent up as he said. He just can't help himself, you are so good, and your fingers are so skilled he almost feels selfish for having someone jerk him off this well. This is definitely better than touching himself.

 You feel a deep warm knot start to tighten in the pit of your stomach and involuntarily bounce yourself on Butcher's fingers. “Feels good, don’t it? Having your slutty little cunt played with so roughly. Right where anyone could walk in?” he doesn't need to hear an audible response as you clench tightly around his fingers. Wantonly moaning out both his and Hughie’s names. “I'm gonna .. cum” you whine as Hughie pulls you into another sloppy kiss. 

“Me too” he moans into your mouth. Grabbing your chin and turning you to face him, Butcher kisses you roughly, both his Hughies and your spit dripping down your chin. His pace quickens as he continues his assault on your sensitive clit and he drags you to orgasm quickly. Both you and Hughie throw your heads back in ecstasy and moan in unison. “Oh fuuuuck.” Hughie almost sobs. His cum painting your hand and the front of your panties. You would have worried about it getting on your dress had Butcher not rolled the thing up almost to your tits. 

Panting you and Hughie collapse onto each other.  And both eagerly stretch your hand out to Butcher and pull him to sit beside you two on the ground. After sucking and licking the cum off his fingers Butcher makes quick work of his leather jacket and his belt. “How do you reckon we do this Hughie?” he asks, palming his erection through his boxers. Still, in a haze from his orgasm, Hughie only groans. “Lad c’mon snap out of it. There's still more fun to be had. Surely you've wanked at least once this week. There isn't any reason for you to be that spent after a little handy.” 

“You guys could Eiffel tower me?” you finally speak up, and pull yourself into Butcher’s lap, grinding against his erection. You almost feel yourself get wetter at that comment. Butcher grins at you in agreement and you both look over to Hughie for his confirmation.  “Yeah, that could be fun, 've only ever seen them do it in porn though, is it an actual sex position?” Of course, he is questioning the validity of the position. You love Hughie, but he is inexperienced when it comes to these matters. He is almost like a lamb, while Butcher is like a ravenous wolf. "Try sounding any less pleased and porn addicted." Butcher chuckles. Ignoring his comment, you continue  to explain “Course it is.” 

 “Why would it be made up? All I have to do is get on my hands and knees and have one of you take me from behind and the other takes my mouth. It's pretty simple actually.”

“And bloody fun” Butcher adds. You can tell Hughie still looks a bit shy at the idea of something so lewd that you propose an idea. “If you want I can take you up the ass?” you giggle. Which seems to make him somehow even redder, almost as if he hadn't just painted your hand with his jizz. “Lad I can tell you this for free, almost every man I’ve met likes anal one way or another. I know you’ve wanted to do this for a while. Don't act like I haven't seen your search history. You're a filthy fucking pervert like the rest of us.” Both of you laugh and he blushes. “Here let me make it a little easier” you giggle, peeling off your panties and dress and sitting on his lap facing away from him.  You grind your ample exposed ass against his cock and you almost feel him grow hard under you. 

“Now butcher come here” you beckon him with your hand and he shuffles over to stand in front of you. Tentatively you lick your lips before pulling the front of his briefs down to expose his hard and twitching cock.

He was a bit bigger than Hughie; more girthy at least. You'd almost forgotten how big he was. You know for certain your jaw is going to hurt tomorrow.

 “Take a picture, it'll last longer Luv,” he smirks above you. Still grinding against Hughie you reach out to grab the base and jerk him a few times. Leaning forward you give him a few speculative licks. Usually, Hughie preferred to take your mouth, it's been so long since you've blown anyone you are a little intimidated by his size. All your inhibitions fade away the moment you put your mouth around his thick head. It's salty but not unbearable, you can taste the day's sweat on him.

Lust Clouds your mind as you practically bury his cock in your mouth, gagging slightly as you reach the base. Butcher groans loudly through gritted teeth and this only solidifies how badly you want to please him. It takes every atom in his body for Butcher not to skull fuck you right then. You look just perfect, lipstick smudged spit dripping down your chin and your puffy stolen lips wrapped around his cock. If he had his phone he'd take a photo. It'd be a shame to not save this moment. 

Behind you, Hughie is growing more and more impatient.  Trying to get your attention by licking a stripe up your back and tentatively grinding his thumb against your ass. “Hey don't forget about me Y/n. I’m still here too,” he whines, grinding himself against your taint.

He certainly wasn't this needy last time he, you and Butcher fucked, then again, he had two people stimulating him at once. Where was all his assertiveness from earlier?  “I didn't forget” you mumble around Butcher. “You are going to have to speak up if you want the lad to hear you Luv. You've got a bit of cock in your mouth.” A Bit was definitely an understatement. 

Smirking he pulls you off his cock with a pop. “Butcher get on your knees and Hughie hold on to my waist okay?” Both men do as they are told, either neither of them had any energy to protest or they were both too horny to care. “Hughie, I'm going to ease myself onto you okay? Don't start to thrust until I say so.” you look back over your shoulder and see his tongue dart out to wet his lips as he nods. 

Taking as you get back onto your hands and knees you are startled by a warm wet sensation prodding at your ass. “Are you okay Y/n?Did I do something wrong?” he quickly pulls away from your ass and you almost instinctively push his face back against you. “I'll take that as a no then.” Hughie smiles and presses his mouth flush against your ass again. Practically making out with your asshole.

 You arch your back and grind yourself against his mouth. Letting our a loud almost pornographic moan. “That's a bloody delicious sight. You've got a lot more balls than I thought son.” Butcher supplies leaning back and pulling your chin towards his now aching cock.  Lolling your tongue out he places his shaft back into your mouth jerking himself off into your mouth. You close your swollen lips around his head and start bobbing again. 

When you feel that you are sufficiently wet you pull away from Hughie’s mouth and playfully move your hips side to side to prompt him. Slipping Butcher out of your mouth you give the younger man a verbal cue. “You can put it in now Hughie, don't worry, she doesn't bite.” he and Butcher chuckle gently at your crude joke as he lines up the blunt head of his cock and starts to push in. 

 “Mmmm’ you moan out as he pushes in deeper. His hand snakes around your waist to pull you closer to him. “Just a bit more.” he groans. “Fuck, you are so tightt.” you feel his bottom out inside you and almost leap at the opportunity to grind your hips back against him. The slight burn of his intrusion feels fucking good. Hughie seems to think the same thing as he starts to thrust into you. 

Leaning forward you shove Butcher back into your mouth hungry for his cock. Quickly taking in the entirety of him without gagging at his size.  All three of you moan in unison as your bodies wetly connect. You grind your hips into Hughie's slowly, careful not to let an inch out of you. “You can be a little rougher than that with her son, you aren't gonna break her. She can take it. Cant you?” he looks down at you. “Yeah, she's a tough little thing. I bet you if we actually wanted to break her we couldn't.” 

With every thrust of his hips, Hughie can feel himself getting more and more wrecked. You’re just so perfectly tight. The way your ass is clapping against his hips looks just like the porn he had watched earlier that week. Unlike the girl in the video, he could tell that you were enjoying yourself. Leaning forward a bit he locks his hand with yours and starts to whisper gently into your ear as he teases and pinches your nipple.

“Y/n  fuck, I'm so close already. You are so good to us. So good to me. Taking me so deeply. Do you think I could feel my cock in your ass if I stuck a few fingers in that greedy pussy of yours?” He punctuates the last few words with some particularly hard thrusts, feeling you clench around him. Removing his hand from your nipple he slips 3 of his fingers into your needy pussy which sends you over the edge. Suddenly clamping around him with a vice-like grip you cum, hard. Your slick wetness gushing down his fingers. Pulling off of the butcher's cock you cry out an unintelligible string of words.

The sudden tightness around him sends Hughie over the edge too. His warm cum spills into you. His hips spasming as he stuffs your ass with his cum. Harder and harder until he collapses onto you. Kissing your neck and back. Looking up through your eyelashes you can tell Butcher is close too.

Lust clouding his eyes he pulls your head forward and you quickly engulf him in your mouth and let him fuck your throat to completion. His grunts and groans make you wetter and wetter every second. “Open your mouth Y/n.” Butcher gruffly pulls himself out of your mouth to roughly jerk himself off on our tongue. Throwing his head back he cums in your mouth. Not wanting to waste anything you wrap your lips around him and let him finish in your throat. Rope after rope of his seed slipping down your abused throat.

“Fuck me” he moans. “I needed that.” all three of you collapse into a mess of bodies and try to come down from your intense orgasm. “That was fucking good.” you all say in unison. “Fucking good.” you conceded. “Although I wish my pussy got a little more attention.” you playfully frown. “I do find it a bit unfair that both you and Hughie got to cum more than once while I've just had my first O.” Butcher pouts��

“Well, what do you suggest?” Hughie questions innocently. 

[halucynator]

Hellllooo,

Omg I really needed more swiftie mutuals <3

Please rant about all things you like, i love rants, gosh we seem to have so many close interests, I am not a writer tho, but I do read, effectively making me a reader which doesn't sound as cool, now that I think about it.

My fav Taylor song at the moment is "Slut!". I cannot get that out of my head. I mean "got lovesick all over my bed", I die a little everytime I hear that.

Fav Olivia song at the moment is logical (kinda like you username aah). I still CANNOT get over "can't take a joke, can't get you off". Like please kill me already.

Fav Sabrina song at the moment is probably "because i liked a boy". (damn who hurt me?)

And fav conan song at the moment, "Lookalike"

Tell me yours?

Nyc.

xx

hiiii

omg thank you thank you thank youuuu <33

okay so i love a lot of things some of them are pretty questionable but I'm questionable literally ask anyone on the discord server so its fine. anywhoo, i love taylor, maisie, gracie, phoebe, alix page, lucy (dacus not myself I'm not THAT narcissistic), olivia hardy (from wasia project) julien, conan, liv, sab (and @loserdiaz but that's a known fact) and so many other people to the point that even i cant keep track. oh and i love laufey, mitski and lyn lapid just bc.

my current fav by wasia project is petals on the moon but ur so pretty especially live from the studio is so gooddd

anywayss, reading is really cool thats how i got into writing (which is the best thing ever ik /hj) i also really really like reading bc it makes me smart and it's super fun

which is your favourite book series?? mine is lockwood and co as if you couldn't already tell by the amount of times I've mentioned it i also really love agggtm series bc why wouldn't it its so good. I'm sure i love so many more book series but my memory sucks (it does not but I'm lazy so I'll use that as an excuse)

anywhooo, i love scream which is weird bc i watched the first one when i was 10 (i know, who let me do that???) and i... liked it? (I'm very questionable i know) but i also tend to rant about it as if its real life (like WHY DID THEY KILL OF *insert name of dead character* IM SO MAD) and not a movie so I'm a bit annoying sometimes but pls don't tell me that otherwise I'll start crying /j

hmm my favourite taylor song atm would be "is it over now?" or "now that we don't talk" bc at the moment i resonate so well with those songs (ikr my life sounds like a nightmare: it is but it isn't really? idk) at yes i totally agree with the "got lovesick all over my bed statement but" also "love thorns all over this rose" and omg "you're not saying you're in love with me, BUT !! YOURE !! GONNA !! DO !!" like who gave taylor the right to be such a mastermind (funny, right? no? okay.) like the entire song, heck the entire album is so GOOD. HER ENTIRE DISCOGRAPHY IS SO GOOD. (this is totally normal fan behaviour btw)

favourite liv song atm is probably lacy but i love all of the songs all the album (and yes logical is soooo good i mean i have to love it otherwise my url is meaningless) but my favourite lyric from the entire album is probably "we both drew blood but man THOSE CUTS were NEVER EQUAL!!" from the grudge (also one of my top 3) bc that hits DEEP. (bc the cuts were deep, i know I'm so funny /j)

favourite sab song atm is prolly cindy lou who / opposite (been there) / a nonsense christmas. i cheated but i simply cant choose one shes too good. also super funny bc cindy lou who and opposite are like sad vibes and then a nonsense christmas i want you to [redacted] and [redacted] me on the couch while we [redacted] presents (sorry i just think I'm so funny when I'm not but dont tell me that i wanna be a stand up comedian no I'm just kidding I'm not a failure. IM JOKING) (also regarding bc i liked a boy, I agree. who hurt you???)

anyways, my favourite conan song atm is prolly the best known option "heather" BUT i also like "the cut that always bleeds" the entire of kid krow tbh

okay i wrote a lot asdxcasdcvafd sorry

alsooo, you didnt ask this but my favourite gracie abrams song atm is "where do we go now?" and "cedar" (you arent mine) bc its such a heartbreaking song especially when you can relate to it. ooh and i also love camden, painkillers, rockland and long sleeves but they're all pretty depressing so if you don't like sad songs they're prolly not for you.

and THANK YOU for this ask this was so fun send me more sometimes <333

[turtle--soup]

Watching TMNT Next Mutation Episode 7 (when I really shouldn't be but... eh.) 😅

Ramblings under the cut.

Sewer rays? OK.

Dude's riding a motorbike through the sewer. Raph just makes it look so cool he stated a trend huh?

"Do I wanna meet the NYPD? Hmm... naaahh, absolutely not!" Same Mikey, same...

Big monkey. Who is his voice actor? He sounds familiar...*

"I can't believe this! I've been dissed by a gangster ape!" Mikey bro this is like a regular Monday for you surely?

"Certified turtlefied!" Adding that to the List of Things I Can't Believe They Say

"Cops in the sewers? They don't sell donuts down here!" Raph providing the obligatory donut jokes 👍

"I dunno what you been eatin'. But I want some." Why don't they believe Mikey about the monkey dude? Like literally they are talking turtles. If anything a talking ape is less weird

These gangsters are all dressed like they're cosplaying alt- design Joker Funko Pops. Or they got lost on the way to audition to be in the 60s Batman TV show.

"We're ninja - not the Power Rangers!" Yesssssss they're crossing the streeeeeaaaamms!

Raph 'n' roll honestlyyyyyyy that's a catchphrase?? Raph buddy...

"That's team leader" 😤 Aw Don Don, you don't deserve this disrespect

"EY BAWS" hoooooo my god

"The schnooks" OK Venus.

"Battlin' crime is FUN! Heh heh I feel like Batman!" Yeah that'll be the knockoff Joker suits.

Also like... the guys are acting like they don't fight crime? But like... they fought the Foot before? And I know that was bc they were an evil ninja clan specifically but you can't tell me they weren't Doing A Crime every now and then? And that was probably why the turtles fight them, at least sometimes??

The TA DAAAAA sound effect again 👌

All the money flying out of the back of the van this is genuinely the cheesiest live action cartoon

God I love how completely done Donnie is today

Mikey that was so fruity (affectionate)

Oh that's convenient. They moved most of the gold in Fort Knox to NYC for a bit. Of course.

The turtles just so happen to be living directly under half the gold in America right now. Of course.

"Translation for the thick of skull" oof Donnie he's your brother! Or not. So you all have a free pass to hit on your sister Venus.

"I suggest big caution" Leo providing much needed representation for people who can't words good (me).

NUCULAR?? DON WTF YOU ARE NOT HOMER SIMPSON

Isn't there a super villain who's a big monkey dude? I can't remember rn and its winding me up**

Honestly these accents... I could've been a VA on this show. I can butcher an East Coast accent with the best of them

Was I supposed to be able to see that wire??

Oh no they've trapped Venus in a classic Thunderbirds episode!

No genuinely though this could be pretty exciting if it wasn't like 3 minutes from the end of the episode...

Raph is very worried. "Whadda we doo just stand around and PANIC??" He's so relatable

Aw Don...

Aw they're crying 😭 bless them

It's a good job Donnie and Venus didn't die, the other three have to share one brain cell and I'm not sure Splinter could handle that alone

The code was Donnie's birthday asdghghfgdgk

"You mess with the monkey and it gets funky" this dude is legit a Power Rangers villain

--

*IT WAS GARY CHALK! I knew I knew that voice! How's a guy get typecast as a talking gorilla, anyway? I really hope that whoever cast him did that intentionally, and if they did I hope they also know that they're a legend.

**I think I might be thinking of Gorilla Grodd??

[loving-jack-kelly]

my 5-year plan <3 option c is the dream I think

this week i have a 20 page story due on Thursday, I need to have my resume and cover letter edited and almost finalized by Friday, I have half of my senior thesis due on Monday, I need to make a spreadsheet of the details of the schools I'm applying to work at and what working at each would do to my five year plan, and instead of doing any of those things I am thinking about newsies.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary399

10/25-26/24

friday - saturday

at the bookstore decade anniversary, i saw the writer andre aciman read.

the writer of call me by your name. i've not seen that movie, or read any of his work, his new book roman year. the excerpts were good but the best bit he read was when he was, at 16, reading from this book of case studies of perverts, 'inverts', spit fetishists, incest lovers, and so on, and his fascination and thought, the world of sex unfolding before him, he could be any one of these, 'as if i read a horoscope and all 12 signs resonated'. that's a loose quotation of him reading it. he also talked about himself, a more interesting man than i would have guessed. i suppose i had a much more positive feeling toward him than i expected, i also didn't expect him to talk about his wife...

a strange thing... or... i don't know... we were on the guestlist, a curated list, this was a special event, a lot of free food, really delicious desserts... this chocolate ganache thing, it must have been italian, my god... i had like... 2-ish. 1.5, if i'm kind to myself i guess. i feel stupid like i overate today. i feel so disgusting honestly and i kinda wanna make myself puke but i won't but tomorrow i'm really gonna try hard to not eat really. tomorrow. i don't know. i feel insane. for lots of reasons. i really feel... ugh. not going to type it out. i'll make myself spiral. i swear i feel so ugly and gross though and stupid and fat ugh i hate how i feel right now. but that's expected... not even from the food. even if it's felt a little much these past couple days... it's really because of a person i talked to today just spreading his lunacy...

anyway, here's a pic of me, i only got to take one, but i was trying to dress in an annoying skinny jeans way, to celebrate the hellp album kinda... not like, really, i just think this looks cute, but... you know... live in the moment even if it's stupid or whatevsss:

i took pics in the bar bathroom and i thought i looked better but the lighting wasn't really good and i think i look so ugly... so now i feel ugly because of that and wonder what i "really" look like if that makes sense.

anyway here's the pics from yesterday:

here's the ai thingies:

and here's an image from today i can't really explain or i guess i can. this person has made multiple people i know including myself feel totally crazy:

i know how weird it is, and evil, to take photos of people without them knowing, pointedly. but it feels warranted for what he is. i guess i'm just another evil person out here, in a world of them, one of the ugly evil things. i should jjust ddieeee.

i talked to one of the owners of the bookstore today, and a guy who helped make it happen, both from new york, as is the other owner of the store (the owners are this super cute gay couple), the owner talked about john zorn, i interjected at a point they were discussing nick cave, and i said i love the birthday party but later nick cave doesn't do so much... i like his used car salesman pathetic freak thing a lot, and that dissolves, the owner talked about him being like a preacher... but i dunno... he really doesn't embody the thing he tries on earlier albums as a solo artist even, the other guy, i'll call him publisher cuz that's a thing he does but it's all experimental stuff and i can't recall the imprint, talked about how he needed blixa to make him really special, which is true i think. i got to talk about rowland s howard a little. we went on, talked about silly music stuff, they showed up later though.,.. eventually we talked a little about dennis cooper, how he once helped a good friend of mine and how touching that is to me. he was like, i saw him getting interviewed back in nyc, he is a nice guy. and i was like, it's shocking to me, that he's out here, reachable i guess, i'm so used to it feeling so far away. he didn't say much to that. the owner asked if i'm a musician, it's strange how he guessed that, or i don't know, is it obvious? maybe my hair. i don't know, i talked about making music where i scream and stuff. they were chuffed it seemed. i didn't tell them who i was, or show them anything... why would i... it'd be so impolite right? the owner told me i should go to new york, i have the vibe. but my gf was like, i told her we can't, and we can't... all the people in new york seem to do anymore is post on twitter. but i also guess the people who don't do that do real things, but like, you know.

the owner talked about seeing naked city with just zorn and mike patton performing, a crazy show it sounded like, zorn going off on sax and patton just screaming and vocalizing. that's such a crazy thing to me to get to see... they're really cool, basically, the people i've met tonight, or these guys, i'm sure i'll never speak to them again.

and i loved seeing my other friends... but the person in the photo, he just drove some of us, or maybe just mostly my other friend and i insane... i can't go into all of it, he's like, okay, he's okay to talk about music w/ it's fun and i like chatting about new stuff i like and getting ribbed about being too into the hellp. but it's just, he was going crazy the whole time, being weird, he kept getting more violent as the night went on, tweaking kinda, and then, started hitting the table and stuff, no one really noticed, just, going crazy crazy, scary to watch and things and he'd make all these faces and try to laugh it all off even though it isn't something you can laugh off. he made my friend feel so bad, they dated briefly, it ended quickly, she still finds him so cute, and he's so pathetic you want to befriend him and help him not be what he is , what he is being miserable and fucked up about everything and just trying to make something happen and failing... detransitioning and becoming a fucking bus driver in colorado, not like i look down on that as much as i feel like it fucks me up how much a vision it is of some you know, ideal, he kept talking about how trying to be an actual blue collar worker is harrowing, and like, no shit poverty is fucking harrowing. but he saw gummo and it's like the first true film he got to experience, idk if there was any stuff that means nothing to him prior or if he liked stuff kids like and ignores that, either way, the owners of the bookstore showed it to him, and they love him, and it's just intense and difficult i dunno.

as the night went on, he kept saying like, let's go there, let's go there, jokingly because he really seemed pained by it and told me something like, it's starting to feel really bad now. and he grimaced like his arm was under a hydraulic press. and i wanted to help him, and i felt so guilty, like it was my fault, i kept saying i'm sorry, i know i joke a lot, but i mean it, sorry you feel bad, i'm not like making fun of you i just like joking around (i asked if he smoked a certain way because of the guy from autechre smoking that way sometimes, and making a silly joke about how autechre sound), i know some people have the impression i mock them, but i'm really not, or something like that. he just stared like i was the one going crazy. he kept saying let's go to oddfellows, he like, then told my friend who did wanna go to hang out with him more, his uber's on his way, barely said bye to her and refused to say bye to me it seemed like, and went off.

she ended up calling my gf crying, miserable because of him. she feels so awful. he's so stupid, such a bad person basically. and i know it... he like dated one of my friend's besties, too. she's in la!!! he just gets around, all over, torturing women.

so, yeah, that's like... it.

listening to this a lot, feeling crazy. this album is great... the hellp, i am certain have hurt women though. i feel fucked up about everything. i dunno. i'm just stupid. i'm stupid and ugly and unhappy i feel bad for all these dipshits in the world. why do i know multiple people who go to the midwest because of fucked up fantasies of being "real"????? it's torturous. the fantasy of blue collar reality, poverty romanticism, being 'base' in some way i guess. and it always fucking has something to do with harmony korine who is definitely a hack now even if i do love that film, gummo... fuck this stupid planet. why are there beautiful and kind people and this wide a range, it's torturous to me. it's just one silly night, not even bad. i ate like a stupid fat pig for free and i even had a shirley temple... wow whoa... whatever...

i wanna throw myself away, i feel like if i were meaner, fewer people would be miserable and stuff. maybe. i don't know. maybe i was really mean and i should have been nicer or something. i'm just crazy. i hate that people can destroy other's self esteem so easily, and that they either don't realize how fragile that is, or they do it intentionally. why would he hurt her so much by being a prick like that, not even saying bye gracefully? not even making an excuse about losing her number, or... deleting it at all. i hope they don't ever see eachother again.

guhhh, i don't know. there's so much wrong with the way people turn to reaction, i hate that i witness it so much. or reveal their reactionary tendencies. it's just terrifying.

there's nothing i can do i just hafta sleep to feel normal in the morning. and then i go nowhere tomorrow. i can cook, i can draw my silly fan art, or other stuff. i wrote a little tonight cuz of this too at least. that's nice.

so,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[agiroflee98]

Questions that I would ask Pedro Pascal if I ever got to Meet Him ✨🇨🇱☀️

I know that this will be INCREDIBLY unlikely (if not impossible), but if I ever met Pedro here is a list of things that I would ask him (because I'm very curious).

What is your favorite dance move?

And could you please show me?

Do you have any guilty pleasures?

Do you have a favorite season?

Aside from Aries, what is your favorite zodiac sign?

*whispers* pleasebegeminipleasebegeminipleasebegemini.

What is your favorite Prince song to dance to?

How is your fox stuffy doing? Did you give him a name? Where is he now?

If he's sitting on his bed, I may cry.

Would you ever consider getting a Letterboxd account?

I would love to see him make lists like "Movies that made me cry" or read his reviews about every single Nic Cage movie.

Do you prefer showering in the morning or at night?

This is an important question that can reveal a lot about a person. (I personally prefer the latter).

Is it true that NYC pizza is super good? Where is your favorite place to get a slice?

I've never really been to NYC (just one of the airports), & I have heard legends of their pizza & have always wanted to try it. I figured that someone who has lived there for 20+ years (& has a deep love of pizza) would have a good list of places to go to.

If you had time, would you ever want to do another play? (Romeo & Juliet, perhaps? Or another Shakespeare play?)

The SASS he would bring if he was in Much Ado About Nothing.

What is the comfiest costume that you've EVER worn as an actor?

We all know the dude values comfiness. I wanna know which costume felt SO GOOD on his body that he still thinks about it to this day (or whenever he's stuck wearing one that's hot/tight/itchy/etc.).

Let's say that a CERTAIN character dies in Gladiator 2 (or TLOU S2 either one). Would you consider that death to be more gruesome than Oberyn Martell's?

I'm on the edge of my seat.

Speaking of Oberyn, would you ever consider getting a replica of Oberyn's yellow robe to wear around the house?

A robe like THAT is too good to be worn once. Maybe it could be a fuzzy fall/winter version of the robe?

What is your process for developing a character/getting into character?

I read somewhere that when he was preparing to play Maxwell Lord, he made a little scrapbook of things about the character & his internal thoughts. I would LOVE to know if he does things like that for every character he plays.

I noticed that you have a shirt that has a picture of Gene Wilder from Young Frankenstein on it. Have you ever seen that movie & do you share my opinion that it is one of the best films ever made?

If he does, I will be SO happy.

Who's your favorite drag queen?

What's your favorite color to paint your nails with?

And can we do a nail show-and-tell?

What kind of TikToks do you like to watch? Do you have any favorite accounts?

How old were you when you started wearing glasses?

Do you think he's near-sighted or far-sighted?

The doctor says that you're dying & you only have enough time left to watch ONE more film: What film is it & why?

He probably won't answer this 'cause he's super indecisive, but it would be interesting to see what he says.

Finally, do you know how wonderful & loved you are & how proud we all are of you?

Here's me reminding you, Pedrito. <3 <3 <3

[tkeyahwrotethis]

I've literally been so busy with college and getting good grades lately I haven't had the time to write creatively or post but I think this week I'll have a bit of downtime to focus on my passion projects.

I joined a gym in the town I live in and I really like it. I like that they have childcare so I can go even when I have my daughter with me. I'm just trying to keep my figure I dont want to let myself go.

I'm also taking an art class and we get to go to museums and create works of art which I love to do anyways so I've had my hands full planning day trips and creating art lately.

aside from that.. i did make it to the club that night to fix my vibe and it worked and i just feel like its so easy to slip into party girl mode because i missed the club so bad. I danced all night.

I danced with this one guy he was a tall darkskinned Black guy & super cute and honestly pretty young tbh lol I swear we fell into some feelings on that dancefloor they way we were grinding and dancing and making out (he even pulled my hair while we were dancing, I wore it down and very long down to my waist and he rolled it into a ball in his fist and pulled it back so we could kiss while dancing... yes the hair Gods were on my side that night). He had me in the tightest chokehold I almost blacked out a few times while we danced I kept trying to tap out but I guess he was feeling me so much he waited until the last minute to let me go lol. it was just all so sensual and intimate. It was like we knew each other, like he was my man. we only danced with each other all night, very monogamous, very romantic and we've been in contact since. I just think we're in different phases of life right now due to the age gap so im not trying to get too deeply involved with him but he gave me the best dance of my life and I'd deff party with him again.

I'm itching to go to the club again and dance with someone new. I wanna see what the scene is like out where I live now instead of always traveling out of state to go into NYC. although NYC never disappoints when it comes to the clubs or a party.

Maybe instead of going to the haunted house this year for Halloween, I'll try the clubs. Now all I need is a costume...

[theschizotypalsolilquy]

"Ok now what if JK's solo album is filled with heavily gendered pronouns, directed to a woman ? You still gonna use 'but other closeted gay singers…' excuse?"

Did this dumb anon really write this and expect us to take them seriously when Jikook just went out in their matching head to toe B & W outfits on a korean couple day, together alone in NYC just the two of them, to celebrate and on the eve of JK's single release, when JK could have had his own partner there, instead? How many couple days does this make Jikook celebrating again? Another one added to the list. GASP, its almost like they are a couple who enjoy spending & celebrating couple days together. White Day, Silver Day, Valentines, Bdays. Even got momma JK making soup for JM's bday to feed to her family. JK posted a selfie of him and JM on Silver Day. JM posted a selfie of him and JK on White Day. JK did a White Day live with JM overseas, playing There For You, bringing up Tokyo and JM was in his comments, cause it was their first White Day away from each other, but they managed it, even if JK did tear up during his live. Now out together making a BIG statement before JK's single on Silver Day together, alone just them. Jikook and special occasions just go hand and hand. Funny, isn't it? Two platonic bros, who happen spend couple holidays together, when they can be with their partners or other people, but keep choosing each other to spend those days with. Interesting.

And for the record. JM's 'she's saying' & JK's 'her' vs Jikook celebrating significant korean couple holidays together. Thats the harsh reality and textbook definition of a closeted queer couple, if I've ever seen one.

Totally agree with you!!

People are blind to things they don't wanna believe, or are too homophobic.

Like you said, they have always chosen each other. Hell, the rest of BTS can't even mention one of them in a sentence without talking about the other. That is how connected they are.

They are a package deal.

People want them to out themselves to validate their selves. They don't understand the danger that puts the two of them in, especially Jimin.

Our poor little mochi is already hated by the cult and solo stans. If they ever came out, it would be so much worse.

I, for one, hope they stay closeted. It's not our business. I'm content and confident in their love and commitment to one another. I do not need their love validated.

[punkshort]

Your Marcus Acacius… let me tell you, when I say my life hasn’t been the same since, I’m not even exaggerating. I mean literally. That man is so swoonable it hurts!!😫 it is impossible not to fall madly in love (and lust😉) with him! The way you described both his inner and outer beauty and his irresistible personality and riz and confidence and raw masculinity is just *CHEFS KISS!! You leave such a visceral sense of who he is he has me in a chokehold and Im just mad that he’s not reeeeeal!!😭😭

your world building is so beautiful! it’s so vivid and delightful it makes me wanna live there. (And I live in NYC😆)

The side characters Iizard and the brother are hilarious! I love them AND I wanna throw an oven mitt at them😂

Your protagonist: I like your protagonist so much she’s so endearing. She’s so sweet and kind even when she’s ready to kick Danny’s ass you can tell she still loves him and will always look out for him. She’s not perfect and struggles at work (and with life) like most of us do but she’s smart and strong and resilient like we all try/want to be so she’s very relatable. It’s easy to see how a man like Acacius would fall in love with her. And even when she’s angry and annoyed she’s still very lovable (in contrast to Kate and Leopold). And that Matt guy. Well… he deserves everything he got lol And the smut… oh the smut. It’s so fluffy and sweet and SO HOTTT🥵🥵 I melted on the floor like your protagonist said🫠🫠

TW: I don’t wanna make this weird I swear. you don’t have to reply at all it’s totally fine. I just want you to know that your art has literally changed my life. I don’t mean to overshare but… being able to take refuge in the world you’ve created got me through weeks of PTSD flashback hell. And I’ve had this one difficulty all my life and decades of expensive therapy couldn’t make a dent but In Another Life cured it. I’m excited to live again🥹. I just wanna say from the bottom of my heart how grateful I am that you shared your beautiful writing with us!❣️❣️💝💖💝💖

Sincerely,

A Marcus Acacius Girly

PS I did reblog your work but I was too embarrassed to leave all this in my comments so I had to go anon in your inbox😅

This was so beautiful to read it took me a minute to figure out how to answer it - I can't really put into words what this means to me but I'll try 🥹

Firstly, thank you so much for pointing out all your favorite parts because that's my favorite part! I absolutely adore hearing what struck you the most as a reader and I like to hear if what I've written came across the way it intended and how I imagined it, etc, so this was and always is so wonderful to hear. It just gave me that extra motivation I needed to work on part 3 later 🤭 (I've already started it but didn't get very far)

Secondly, thank you for sharing a bit about your personal struggles. I know that has to be so hard for you to share and I appreciate that you felt impacted enough by something I wrote to want to say something about it. I don't think I know how to describe the way my chest literally tightened when I read that part but I'm floored something I wrote could help anybody in the world the way you described. It makes me so happy I could help you in that way, it really truly does. I really hope things are looking better for you now ❤️

Lastly, thank you for reblogging! Don't feel obligated to write anything when you do, I appreciate it all the same!

I'm very grateful you reached out to me and trusted me enough to share a piece of yourself. I sincerely hope the rest of the story meets your expectations and continues to bring a little light into your life ❤️ I also rely heavily on this platform (and my own writing) as a form of therapy (and maybe a little escapism, sure) so we certainly have that in common 😘

[sentfromwolves]

okay, gotta ask.... cannibal dream?

I AM SO GLAD SOMEONE ASKED tw for cannibalism obviously

I had this dream when I was like. sixteen. maybe??? wildest dream ever, haunted me all night, I literally cannot forget it, it was so distinct. SO ANYWAYS: cue this massive dystopian metal city. picture the most grungy futuristic dystopian fantasy-adjacent NYC aesthetic, and it's stacked. the city just keeps stacking on top of itself, building upward constantly toward this grotesque, polluted sky.

I'm somewhere in the pits of this city, but of course, I'm not me. I'm a detective, bottom of the barrel grunge guy scraping by on private practice, constantly trying not to get squashed out of business by the capitalist megacorporations running the place. overpopulation is a huge issue, so no one really cares about missing people here, and anyways, if someone does go missing, most likely you're just not going to find them again. it's a long way down to the bottom of the city, and if you get shoved off the railing of an upper level, you're joining up with plenty of corpses way down at in the abyss.

but hey, detective-me needs to make a living somehow, and someone really wants their sister found. so detective-me and my scrungly-ass partner are kicking some shit up through this gross night market, looking for leads, kinda gettin nowhere. and my partner is eating this hamburger, disgusting greasy thing, and i'm chatting with the hamburger stall guy, asking him if he's seen this girl around. and after a little while, he kinda laughs and is like, you really wanna know? and I'm like yea pls I'd like to be able to keep the lights on. And he's like: well, your partner's eating her. detective-me's partner spits out his burger, starts retching. both of us are horrified. "you don't know?" this grotesque old burger stall man tells us both. "no good meat left on the market. but the corporations give us a bargain on theirs."

turns out that to reduce overpopulation and also profit, the megacorporations that rule this city are basically devouring (literally devouring) people below the poverty line. there's a whole part of this dream where I bounced rapidly back and forth between the pov of the detective-self and the missing girl in the cannibal meat factory, trying to escape even though one of the workers had fallen in love with her but didn't want to let her go. there are some extremely grotesque details i won't include because they were just utterly horrific but anyways yeah then later on i woke up in a cold sweat like WHAT THE FUCK and that's the cannibal dream╰(*°▽°*)╯i've been haunted by it ever since

[fearsomeandwretched]

I really don't wanna live in NYC bc it's so ungodly expensive but I don't think I can live somewhere where I HAVE to drive I'm so traumatized after being thrown out of a car and then being in a crash a month later. I still don't have complete function in one of my knees!!! And I've never loved driving or cars. My grandfather totaled my first one and since then I've had really bad luck with cars I've had two since then and one of them like died and the other has problems like it's just alwayssss something with cars. Would never like to be in one again

[anotherblblog]

Fan Meets and irl BL adventures

I still wanna go through pictures and videos of the fanmeets and such for bl and bl adjacent events and places I've been able to attend thus far but talking and thinking even more about Utsukare and my trip this spring to watch the movie and such and also the fact, I'm very much procrastinating on some work right now has me in the mood to at least list out all the events and bl actors I've seen.

Last Twilight in the Park - BKPP and ITSAY cast

KaownahTurbo Mini Fan Meet - Kaownah, Turbo, Mild, Bhudi

Phuket Trip - ITSAY filming sites (the school, Teh and Oh's houses, Promthep Cape, Skyline MV Beach, Dibuk Restaurant)

IdolFan Fest - Wabi Sabi actors, Kaownah, Mild, Bhudi, most of the KinnPorsche cast, the Love at 9 Cast, many many many many others

GMMTV Building

Nadao Bangkok Building

Last Cafe on the Right

Manila trip - getting my hat and Gameboys filming sites (Ortigas Ave, Pasig Park)

Love Out Loud Fan Fest 2022 - Gun, Tay, Singto, and friends

KinnPorsche filming site (Rosewood Hotel)

Chang Mai Trip* (I went because Manner of Death was filmed there but the actual filming sites were hella far and I didn't arrange transporation, so I went to an elephant sanctuary)

Bangkok meet up with @liyazaki and @meteorjam

Idol Exchange - KaownahTurbo

Phuket meet up with @liyazaki and @meteorjam

Blue Room screening at Cinemalaya - Elijah Canlas

EliKoy meet up

Casio event - KaownahTurbo

GMMTV Fanday in Osaka - Gun, Mix, and friends

Lit & Glitter - PP Krit

Utsukare Season 1 Special Edit Version

My School President Prom Night Live - MSP cast

GMMTV Building

Dp Dance Studio Charity Showcase- KaownahTurbo

Phuket Trip

Taipei Trip (on my radar because of Your Name Engraved Herein)

MarkFord video call - Mark, Ford, Gemini

Utsukare Eternal (I saw it 6 or 7 times)

Utsukare filming sites (the shrine, Hira's house)

Songkran

About Us But Not About Us screening - Elijah Canlas

Love in the Air Manila Fan Meet - LitA cast

Utsukare AniMate Cafe event

Love Story SantaEarth Fan Meet in Vietnam - SantaEarth

Nature Thai Massage Parlor - Tul's massage place and one of them has a big picture of Tul above it, second closest I've been to him

Where is the Lie screening - Royce Cabrera

ok that's kind of a long list lmao

blurbs and takeaways:

all of these international trips started because I won a hat from Kokoy in a Gameboys' fan raffle, which I later got but it wasn't the hat I was told I won but ended up being a more meaningful hat anyway

Kaownah is the actor I've seen the most

Elijah is the actor I've spent the most face time with and had the longest conversations with

Elijah got on the mic told a FULL ass auditorium of his family and fans that I was the biggest Cairo hater in the world (which is true actually)

most everyone I've met and had any sort of face time with has been really nice and excited to talk with an interfan

I won a video call with MarkFord for the MSP concert and their excitement at seeing me again made Gemini who was in the room come over to see what was happening and he was also very excited to see me again

most of them tend to be shorter than I imagined but I'm also 6'1 and also a lot of them wear platform heels or very chunky shoes lmao

fans and staff at events tend to be hella nice and curious about me and assist with translations or directions and sharing gifts and tips

I "saw" Tul Pakorn at NYC Pride 2023 but didn't register it was him because I was 5-10ft behind him and thought "that's a nice white mesh shirt" and later to my eternal chagrin saw him on IG wearing that very same 'nice mesh shirt.' I had to laugh to not cry.

I entered a raffle to meet Yusei and didn't win and so I didn't go back to Japan and later read on twitter he was meeting fans there anyway

fan meets/concerts and goodbye sessions are truly LONG AF!!! Some of them could easily be 10+ hours onsite.

@bengiyo I have told you and @liyazaki the most about my travels - I've already added a few missed memories but lemme know if y'all remember any omissions lmao

at some point, I'm going to need to buy a shelf or two for all the bl merch and pictures I have

next up for me:

Khaotung and First in Sao Paolo

Kaownah (lmao) and Mild in Manila

Gun, Tay, and friends in Manila

I have an eye out for announcements about Be On Cloud's NYE party but no details has been revealed or ticketed yet

[runthepockets]

I feel like talking about music. I'm gonna post 7 albums that describe me. Shit that shaped my worldview, reflects my aesthetics, and all that other stuff. Puttin it under read more so no one's dash gets clogged.

ZUU - DENZEL CURRY.

I'm a huge fan of southern Hip Hop. It's dense and eclectic and always so full of life and culture, everything from Andre 3000's thick Atlanta twang on Intl Players Anthem to DJ Paul's production on any given Three 6 Mafia project, it's just my shit. It all speaks to the state of living in the south and has made so much impact on the broader state of Hip Hop. especially in the modern day.

This album feels....so personal. Like coming back home and meeting up with an old friend and realizing you both still know that secret handshake you made up in middle school, or watching the emotional climax of a coming of age movie. I was as wild as I was loving in my youth, so tracks like Ricky and Speedboat and Shake 88 which reference everything from getting in fights in your high school Dickies and football hoodies to escaping hood life to spitting bars about neighborhood bad bitches. It just speaks to me and my experiences, It's always good to know there are other black dudes out there writing love letters and cautionary tales about the violent environments and close knit & loving cultures that surrounded them in their youths spent below the bible belt. I wish I'd had this album when I was 17.

2. VIVA LA COBRA - COBRA STARSHIP

I've been listening to Cobra Starship since I was about 15, and this album has never left my all time greats. It's so fucking fun, like an 18 year old stole his dad's credit card and drove up with his friends to hang in NYC with fake IDs. The bragging, slightly macho, slightly cynical, fun but not too stupid persona Gabe Saporta personifies on this album speaks to me so deeply and shaped me into the man I am today. He has the cynicism and self aware, sarcastic edge that only a former Punk making dance music could have.

3. THREE DAYS GRACE - THREE DAYS GRACE.

Around the age of 13 I was carrying a massive weight; some of it was dysphoria, some of it was internalized racism, some of it was just plain average shit that comes with the territory of being a child under capitalist patriarchy. I felt lost and misunderstood, until I found this album completely by accident. Tracks like Home and Drown spoke to my experiences with abuse and the intense bouts of willpower and self sufficiency that I knew I was capable of but didn't have the courage to act on. I'd put these songs on in my room and drift away, all the pressures my parents and friends and school had put on me just washing away. It was loud and raw and angry and fueled the newfound passion and teen rebellion that would make up the majority of my teens and shape my worldview in adulthood.

4. RUN THE JEWELS 2 - RUN THE JEWELS

The aggressive machismo on this album and the general fuckboy-isms of it all speak to me. Bars like "you want a whore in a white dress, I want a wife with a thong" and verses like "I got that dick in her mouth all day" are just standouts. Just laying everything out, speaking your mind, holding back no punches. The album also weaves in tracks about police brutality, class warfare, and the harsh reality of being pushed to do things you aren't proud of to make ends meet (Killer Mike has a bar about having to sell cocaine to a pregnant woman, and another about his wife being shot by police in front of his son.) I honestly can't see who wouldn't be changed after listening to this, or at least feel seen. It's a no skip banger from beginning to end, if you really wanna understand the essence of Jared, this is it.

5. SOUL GLO - DIASPORA PROBLEMS

Growing up a black kid who liked rock music was extremely taboo, back in the day. It earned you some level of alienation in both black and white dominated spaces. I'd always felt in between worlds; The gritty realism of Hip Hop spoke to me just as the maniacal, commanding essence of Rock and Metal did, and it seemed neither party wanted much to do with me.

Imagine my excitement in 2022 when I find out about Soul Glo, an all black Punk band from my town, who frequently scream their hearts out about everything from police brutality to fake friends to feeling ostracization and tokenization as a black Punk band, with absurd humor and such intense display of vulnerability unlike anything I'd seen before. Finally, I thought, a band that understands me. A band for guys like me.

6. MOBB DEEP - THE INFAMOUS

I got way too high on acid while solo tripping last year and spent a lot of that trip freaking the fuck out. Doom Metal was too much, looking in the mirror was too much, watching tv was too much, everything was just too fucking much.

Except for this record.

This record saved my life and got me into Rap music again. I've cried to it as many times as I've lifted and shaken my ass to it. Though I've never been involved in the street life-- especially not to the degree that Havoc and Prodigy lay claim to-- I grew up privy to it. My environment was incredibly violent. A lot of moralizing by mass media and white people of all backgrounds was lost on me; my father sold drugs to keep me fed and to put Christmas presents under the table, and he'd brought a couple of sex workers into the mix as well (all of whom were incredibly kind women), I felt if anything or anyone was failing, it was the justice system that put guys in these positions.

This album is fucking ruthless. The Jazz and Boom Bap elements add depth to it that I can't really say any other Jazz or Boom Bap rap album has done the same way since. It's also incredibly vulnerable at times. These guys have more nuance and versatility than any other rapper of their time, and it speaks to me as a black dude of working background and experience.

7. THE SLIM SHADY LP - EMINEM

Anyone who's followed me for more than a day knows how much I love Eminem. I think he's witty, charming, funny, and a really down to Earth dude, which probably sounds insane considering the amount of violence and bigotry he spews on the mic at any given time.

This album practically shaped my life and the way I internalize other people's opinions of me. As a kid, I grew up with a pretty abusive mom, and as such always felt the need to apologize or shrink in on myself just for existing. I hadn't really learned how to nurture the spirit until Eminem. The rage, the insanity, and the violence, was all a sheen for an album that truly told a story of how to power through life only trusting yourself and a few other insane, close friends, but most importantly to not let anything get you down and to simply not give a fuck (and to tell anyone who insists otherwise to get on their knees and suck it). The guy spoke real shit and had the credentials to prove it, he knew what he was about and made his dreams a reality, and that was awesome to me.