#and hopefully tomorrow i'll make a proper verse post

[sinfulparadise]

Back on my bullshit thinking about the brothel AU

[thehoneyedhufflepuff]

Teacher's Pet

written for the carry on countdown day 25:

undercover

Rating: Explicit

Words: 5200

Summary: Baz is swamped with student teaching & his doctoral programme. Simon just wants to make him a Shepherd's pie & show him a good time.

Note: So, when I first saw this artwork by @icarus-n-flames (original post here), my immediate thought was something like, "What is Fire-verse Simon up to?" And so this fic was born...

Fall 2021

SIMON

Baz has had a long bloody week.

That's what he tells me every evening when he gets home, when I ask him about his day. "Bloody long day, bloody long week."

It's finally Friday. I almost wouldn't've known if he hadn't said so this morning. "Thank snakes it's finally fucking Friday."

I'll show him a fucking Friday, because we've not had a shag all week, either. He's been too knackered, and that's fine and all, but I've been spoiling for it for days now. And it's not like he has to wake up early tomorrow... 

Maybe he's been spoiling for it, too. Hopefully.

I mean, I'm hoping he'll at least like what's on offer. 

I'm all kitted out in an apron and tight pants (his tight pants) and nothing else. I've got a plug up my arse because I really, really don't have the patience for prep-work tonight. And, like, if he's not convinced by me being close to starkers, I'm hoping that'll do it.

Also I'm making shepherd's pie for dinner.

I glance at the clock as I slide the pie into the oven. Baz should be home any second now—

Yep. I can hear him outside the front door. 

Then—

Fuck, then…

I wonder if I’ll ever get tired of looking at Baz. Seems impossible, really, especially with him looking like this. 

He’s been student-teaching this term—it’s part of his doctoral programme and also probably why he’s so knackered—and he looks well professorial. Pressed, fitted trousers. Navy blue jumper with a pale pink shirt underneath. A hint of a burgundy tie with tiny pink flowers peeking out at his collar. His long dark hair’s knotted at the back of his head. 

He just looks so fucking smart. (I mean, he is so fucking smart.) And hot.

So hot. 

(I still get hot thinking about him in a pair of black horn-rims.) (Like, I’ve considered getting him some just for the aesthetic.) 

I feel like there’s a nonzero number of students in his classes with pent-up hot teacher fantasies. I sure as fuck would if I were his student…

Reminds me of that one song by The Police—whatsit?—“Don’t Stand So Close to Me.”

Sometimes when he looks like this I just want to play that song, knock him down into a chair, and, like…give him a lap dance, I guess. Fuck him proper, if we weren’t in public. 

Probably I’d need to be trolleyed first, and probably I’d be embarrassed, afterward, like that time I pole-danced for him in that nightclub. To “Teeth.” 

Fucking hell, I really try not to think about that. Baz likes to remind me of it every time I think I’ve finally forgotten, the wanker. Penny, too, when she wants to hold something against me (good-naturedly and all). It’s her favourite bit of cannon fodder. 

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