#and honestly? maybe that’s rly the only takeaway ppl should have

[toytle]

can i see 5 + 6 plsssss 🤲🏾

5) bedtime story [halbarry]

i must confess, this was simply a pre-sleep scenario playing in my head while i was settling into bed, no plot, no punchline. sometimes your brain just plays movie scenes of your fav characters, and you have no choice but to get back up to write it down before you forget. not much happens after this, but i wanna save it jic this does end up being drawn bc, well, i think it’ll be even cuter visually ☺️

6) pretty ugly [t4t hb au]

at the risk of word vomiting my process, i planned their first meeting since the very inception of the t4t childhood friends au, but i keep delaying it bc frankly. idk if i trust myself to handle kid hal yet. he was such a sweetheart back then, but every time i look at the way i portray him, it doesn’t feel like i represent the full picture

kids act differently around peers than they do authority, so i thought i would still be able to maintain his “childhood innocence” if i threw in some arrogance/ignorance to reflect how easily influenced he is by his environment too. i’m not sure if i strike the balance. i worry that the way i push his more immature qualities misrepresents him as a simple-minded meathead stereotype instead

i also have mixed feelings abt this one bc even tho i wrote this before i found out, i keep getting flashbacks to the childhood hal + carol first meeting retcon where hal goes from “no way, you wanna be a pilot too??” to “psh, girls can’t be pilots!” which is not at all supposed to be the read on this. not to mention, this particular au has slight dcshg influences, so it’s also an expanded characterization, but maybe a counterintuitive one. as if this wasn’t complicated enough, like how the hell is anyone supposed to know any of this thru a jokey comic lol

and btw, i don’t think this is smth anyone would criticize or even think abt, fanart tends to get way more leniency than fanfic from what i’ve seen. but this isn’t abt anyone else, this is between me and hal, and unfortunately those are just the types of things i have to consider when it comes to my personal quality control

[ask game wip list]

[crazygaysex]

incomprehensible conjecture and rambling about sunny/rcg under the cut! idk man I got 1 hour of sleep in the past 24 or wataver and my brain is an abandoned swamp Good Nigte

i certainly am not arguing that mac Absolutely Isnt a stereotype of a predatory gay man/self-hating homophobe or whatevr. i wont argue the homophobe one at all really,not great even if they rectified it and further tried to make up for it or whatever w mac finds his pride (which i love, regardless). but honestly i dont think the predatory complaint really makes a whole lot of legitimate sense considering every charatcer on the show is Extremely predatory in their own right. if he wasnt i’d be irritated to be honest. i do agree w wat mcelhenney said something like that its cool that they decided to acknowledge he was gay without changing him fundamentally as a person; he still needs to fit into the show or watever. like idk he’s not Ideal Gay Rep ofc but he’s awesome still. To Me. I like when character’s sexuality can be an improtant acknowledged facet of them but doesnt overtake the rest of te narrative! It never occurred to me that his behavior toward dennis would be seen as predatory ina stereotypical way seeing as how their relationship dynamic is so fckign bizarre. charlie has the same level of dogged cluelessness about the obj of his affection’s true feelings, so it didnt occur to me to see mac touching dennis’ knee or stuff of that variety as being any different ig or as making fun of queers or watevr. if i am wrong/misunderstanding i apologize. i have never considered mac from that perspective before.

honestly i kinda get the complaints. i’ve never rly thought rcg all have 10000% pure intentions with the insensitive kind of humor they are into, no matter their loophole justifications for shit. sometimes i almost believe their reasoning and do basically understand but it still seems flimsy when you considers stuff like the blackface stuff which is indeed kind of funny at times mainly bc the joke is the absurdity of it all, like mac in the shower with the brown dripping off him like he’s melting; it’s not funny at the expense of black ppl but more so at the expense of how goddam stupid and unaware mac is. i havent seen the blackface/brownface ones in years sos i dont have a whole lot to say excepe they seemed to be clearly against using blackface as the moral while still using it to get laughs. so. really honestly i don’t know that it’s Liderally Ever edgy white people’s call to use something like blackface regardless of context, regardless of their obvious intent? i dunno i have tried to find Black ppls opinions online a couple times but struggled to find any tangible results. the only other thing i have to say with ym white person words is that i think it’s stupid that the streamig companies take down all insensitive episodes like theyre trying to brush them under the rug and pretend it never happened in wake of a changing political climate. i get it, but kinda just seems like corporate scrambling ie disney getting ridof all of song of the south but still profiting from splash mountain eprhaps. something seems dodgy to me about pretending it doesnt exist anymore just to cover their asses. i understand the sentiment i guess but i dont think that’s really the main goal of the BLM movement, to purge streaming services of any questionable/racially insensitive/Fully Racist material; there’s surely more important things at the top of the lists besids Good Branding . im not sure if that makes sense

also a lot of episodes the joke is the blatant but somehow woefully oblivious homoerotic overtones present between the guys, like a Lot of the time. it is very funny though is the thing and a lot of thm are my favorites. i dunno. i also thought hte pooping transgender bit was pretty funny mainly cause it was absurd. i think maybe because i have my own what i think are reaosnable and empathetic views about certain stuff like queer shit it doesnt necessarily occur to me that they are trying to make fun of queer people.. like people make fun of conservative fans for having completely missed the point of it all being satire, and wat if i am being tricked to into assuming rcg has kind intentions and isnt trying to make fun of queer people just cause the thought didnt occur to me? instead of taking all the gay subtext serious- WHICh i Do, i should probably be more aware that to rcg it is just a bit and not really that deep. but mac and dennis were totally fucjing in s5 canonically. anwyays like aside from the carmen shit which is handled So Fuckign Bad and it makes me so upset cause i actually love carmen they were just very clearly not bothered with actually representing trans people accurately. so in the bathroom one if even fuckin dee reynolds is like, saying a trans woman in a woman’s bathroom is obviously normal.. it seems like they’d rectified some of their previous Very flawed rhetoric surrounding trans women (ie the whole “u slept with me when i was still a man” line. makes me cringe a bit ebery time)u get wat i mean?? not that it atones for it obviously. i love carmen she desreved better

butreallt i dont have any like. Pure Faith in rcg to be super accountable or honest about their intentions or to have the most accurate or agreeable beliefs or whataver. theyre just fucking about really because they can without any lashback. and people i think like being able to laugh at offensive shit thru scenarios which supposedly distance you from bigots/evil people and make u feel better about yourself watching these dumbass evil people talk slime. when like. glenn yelling supposedly arabic-sounding gibberish for example: it is funny in this context not just cause it’s wildly inappropriate and absurd but also because there’s prob significant amt of people who actually dont have an issue with it who could watch it and not have that takeaway whatsoever. i dont kno wt im talking about anymore btu honestly if youre trying to watch a show that isnt rife throughout with controversial/offensive/insensitive language and story beats, i dont know why you would try to stomach it with sunny. like for gods sake they used blackface more than once! i dunno man

[thislousytshirt]

i have been rly mad lately abt the whole "self deprecating humor is bad for you uwu" (if i put uwu after it that delegitimizes it right) i think it would be okay if the tone was like "hey guys youre great and all those terrible things you say about yourself arent true, youre wonderful and you should tell yourself that more" that would be fine, but naw its like "hey guys i know you THINK its a coping mechanism but saying bad things about yourself even as a joke is so bad for your brain and not only that but its so awkward and CRINGE when you do it" which is just... idk how other ppl feel about it but its just so awful to me.

there are several things wrong with this approach. for one its very guilt heavy, it evokes the "youre not taking care of yourself" guilt, and brings in how uncomfortable it makes other people. secondly it takes something thats a symptom of a mental illness and makes it into a cause, blaming the person for causing or perpetuating their own illness. which is not to say that symptoms cant be harmful but i think we understand when someone is self harming, its usually not appropriate or effective to finger wag at them to stop without offering any support to the underlying problem.

lastly... i mean, youre giving unsolicited psych advice to people you dont know. you have to be careful with that. if youre going to be so judgemental about it you might get the wrong takeaway. someones takeaway might be that their low self esteem is self inflicted, or expressing their negative self feelings is bad, or that they need to police themself for negative thoughts. my personal takeaway is "ah so its possible to indulge in self deprecation like an addiction" and/or "this is bad thoughts and behavior that make me a bad person"

theres lots of other personal problems i have with it starting with "i dont like it when strangers give me health advice" but also mainly...i personally have a lot of uses for self deprecating humor. it makes ME more sympathetic to myself by evoking the response i would have if someone else said the same thing. it maybe expresses feelings i wouldnt have otherwise expressed and gives me an opportunity to notice them and decide if these are things that even matter to me or if theyre really untrue. its also a hugely useful social trick around people who dont think very highly of me, or people who just cannot stand uppity people (you know, women & minorities) who think they have any skills.

are any of these things really good defenses of self deprecation? no i mean i dont think its the best ever, i just...im just so tired of being given advice in this tone. honestly please just stop telling me to have a better attitude on things. i dont appreciate it any more than i appreciate being told that wearing sweat pants is bad for my mental health which is a WHOLE OTHER THING OH MY G

[sovonight]

Dude i like rly admire you,, youre such a good artist AND youre going into the stem field!! Youre so amazing:,,) Im also trying to go into stem and continue my interest in art. I was wondering if you ever find it hard to do both and any tips for someone in stem?

ahh i’m really flattered to hear that, & that you’d ask me abt it! to answer ur question, i might ramble on a bit, but:

i’ve never found it hard to do both. ofc that’s easier for me to say now that i’ve graduated lol, but i’ve never gone, “oh my god, how am i going to balance art with this?”. keep in mind however that i didn’t have to work during school, so any time outside of class and the occasional student org activity was my own. (i also lead a very lonely social life so i had more time than most.)

on art: i lost a looooot of sleep staying up late to draw bc that was when i could draw, but it was a happy loss and it was important to me to have that time to myself. i also really valued drawing as a mode of interaction, and was motivated by the media i love, characters i love, and the ppl i enjoy interacting w online. rly, just enjoy it! find any aspect of art that makes it worth it to you

on schoolwork: to give u an idea of how still doing art on the side might have impeded my studies, i kept my gpa above 3.5 for all four years & joined an honor society (probably due to my gpa), but bc i wasn’t totally focused on engineering i didn’t get into internships or do research as an undergrad. the internship i did get was in my 4th year, and i got the impression from my professor that i was very behind in that respect. (i think most people get experience in the summer or during junior year, at least.) still, i got accepted into a few ~prestigious~ universities for masters degrees (and 1 phd), so maybe what i did was enough. academic/career-related tips:

if submerging urself in STEM 24/7 stifles you, & if having a creative outlet helps you in ur studies, consider taking some art classes! i only took 2 art classes in total but they were both breaths of fresh air after all my stem courses, and i can’t describe what a relief it was to have classes that gave me an excuse to assemble collages, and solve compositions instead of equations

the future is coming sooner than you think! u dont have to worry much in ur early years, but if you can, try to get an internship/do research at some point as an undergrad. i hear it makes it easier to find a job after graduating, and honestly, just gathering as much experience as u can probably helps.  if you don’t get replies back, don’t despair– many job offers are made through personal connections anyway

and that’s why you might wanna consider talking to your professors! consider going to talk to them during office hours if they seem even vaguely welcoming. professors’ office hours are usually quite empty, and it really doesn’t hurt to talk to them. if it helps, the first time i went to a professor’s office hours about something that wasn’t classwork, i’d prepared a throwaway question abt grad school to talk about & ended up getting offered an internship. u never know

u can also go to job fairs for internship and job type stuff, but i never went so i can’t talk about it lol

if you need resume material but don’t have an internship, you can volunteer with some student orgs & seek out that experience (apparently it demonstrates initiative)

if ur thinking abt going for a phd, research is something of an unspoken prerequisite to getting into a phd program (unless you have a professor on your side who’s vouching for you)

if you apply for grad school & haven’t done research you might only get into masters programs, like i did. then when you ask professors if they accept masters students in their research groups the professors look at you funny, and tell you that they only take phd students, and if you wanted to transfer from a masters to a phd you should just start out as a phd student in the first place, ‘cause phd students get priority. (but 1 nice professor offered to carve out a spot for a masters student in his research group, so you never know)

the takeaway here is that if u have a professor (or other person of influence) who’ll vouch for you, you can do many things. i heard a story abt someone who was rejected from grad school, but a professor who worked there wanted them, so the professor got the admission decision reversed and they were accepted in. whether that was right or not is a whole other question, but connections can do wonders