#and here is My Interpretation: childe knows his position and knows it will force him to hurt others

[starscr0ss]

i actually have a hard time understanding childe's character and is mostly because of other people's takes + im like so scared of mischaracterizing him

[bababerries]

Jack is a lot of things but tbh I don’t really get why people call him a stalker and I do take issue with insinuating he was abusive to Lacie in their relationship (when she was alive that is. His behavior towards her daughters, her best friend/doll and all the things she loved post her demise was extremely awful)

Jack’s behaviour towards Lacie is never normal or healthy and is definitely creepy. But I don’t see how he’s abusive or a stalker. If anything id say one of the issues in their relationship was Jack was too much of a pushover who had such little respect for himself that he never had the will to truly fight for a bond that they both cherished because he just couldn’t see anything beyond. I can’t help but feel like labeling him as abusive in this stage of their relationship a bit cruel towards him and unsympathetic. And I love Lacie to the moon and back but I’ll be honest I do think she was abusive to Jack in this relationship. (I am in no way trying to demonize her for this that’s my babygirl and she’s been through a lot. But I think Jack’s feelings also matter here)

I don't think we talk a lot about how Lacie sexually assaulted Jack (COCSA) in their first interaction with one another. And then later goes onto encourage him to do sex work. And Jack listens.She purposely choose to talk to him as he was someone in a vulnerable position. (Homeless and abused) so that she could play with him. She gives him her earing and tells him to come and find her Do I think Lacie was serious when she was saying this? No. I don't think Lacie genuinely made plans to see Jack again. She was just simply fouling around. This encounter meant very different things for both of them. And for Jack it flipped his whole world on his head. He was shown love for the first time in his life and was encouraged to chase after it by that person so he did. While the efforts he goes to get her is concerning I feel like calling this stalker behavior gives a much different impression and also feels a bit unempathetic to me? And is also just incorrect. Jack spends 7 years trying to find Lacie under the impression that she to wanted this shown physically with the earring. Not 7 years watching her from afar. I think it's also worth noting Jack processed Lacie's love as maternal to an extent. She did things for him a mother should do for a child (give him food, cut his hair, give him life advice and orders, protect him from bad guys, hugs) I don't wanna go super in depth bc i'd love to make a whole analysis on Jack's feelings for Lacie but Lacie even makes this comparison herself

(And once again I wanna preface with I don't think Lacie owes Jack motherhood. In fact i'm very uncomfortable with viewing motherhood in a positive lens in regards to Lacie's arc as it felt like it was always something forced upon her to further abuse and mystify her. )

And the second time. Lacie once again is the one to ask Jack to see her again. (This time however out of genuine desire.) She makes the first move and suggest this of him

I think it's fair to say Jack would probably want to try to see her again after this as an alternative response to "What are you going to do now Jack?" But I feel like it's a bit up in the air/up to interpretation. Of course I 100% think he wants to see Lacie. But he to is scared of overstepping boundaries to an extent that damages their relationship. He doesn't answer his question to her saying "I want to see you again" "I'm going to see you again" "Can I see you again" It's "I don't know." Which I think you can also take as now that Jack has completed the only life goal he's made for himself he doesn't know what to do with himself. He could be hiding his want and desires to surprise her and see her but he has no reason to do that here. Levi also giving him the paper in this scene suggests Jack lacks the knowledge to come back on his own. Point is Lacie made the first move here and asked him to come back once again she's the one pushing things.

Lacie has power over Jack. She's the on with power over him because he was vulnerable towards her. I don't mean to demonize Lacie with this post and perhaps I focused too much of her flaws in the relationship but the main point I wanna make is I do feel like people are too hard on Jack in regards to how he acted in their relationship when she was alive. Unfairly antagonizing him when he's the bigger victim in this relationship.

[1010ninetynine]

a masterpost of what i consider gay subtext in Uramichi Onii San - the Manga

not the Anime quite yet. no offense Touko Machida but I simply do not want to deal with two interpretations of the work at this point in time.

Generally Kinda Romantic Subtext Between Certain Characters that I Think Can Be Interpreted Either Way

Uramichi and Usahara I cite this for the near telepathic communication. Say what you will - married couples are known for this shit - and while it's definitely not anywhere close to confirmed that these two characters have strong feelings for each other, imo this was pretty gay of them. But to put it one way - are you really friends if people don't mistake you for a gay couple at times? imo not really.

additionally, while it might be just beginning chapter art...tell me where our favorite bunny is looking? Is he being respectful?

(honestly i do think usahara is straight but yk...this mangaka likes his gay men pathetic methinks so there is a chance!)

2. Uramichi and Iketeru

back when iketeru was in hs and uramichi's age isn't given - but i think they're the same age? anyway the lyrics over this scene are just...gay as hell. And they're helping a child find their mom. That is married couple behavior.

(obviously could just be a joke/not intended. their relationship is literally a gag on not understanding each other because iketeru is too happy for uramichi)

3. Kumatani and Iketeru

there's also some somewhat strong subtext between kumatani and iketeru. Like first, kumatani was the first guy who got the weird shirt iketeru found.

and next, the constant protection of iketeru from alcohol is courtesy of kumatani our mvp

he even protects him from our favorite loser

while not as extreme as his protection of HACHITA THE BABY it is still noticeable that Iketeru is someone he cares about.

and both kumatani and iketeru hid their love life from the camera (as did the whole cast hehe). Kumatani literally says his love life isn't family friendly - which can mean a lot of things, including that he's homosexual. Iketeru says it's too beautiful to be shared - which can mean anything really, even that he's straight and had a normal love life that he ain't willing to share.

Imo this sequence of behaviors can be read one of two ways. First of all, you'd have to be blind to not see the obvious resemblance between Iketeru and Hachita, so the affection and thus acceptance of strange gifts due to their similarity is natural. But also...gay? Hmmmmmmmmmm

4. Uramichi and Kumatani

They kind of just hang out a lot, and Kumatani regularly reads more positivity in Uramichi than is probably there. Not really as showstoppingly romantic as the other three examples of subtext, but imo still quite a nice bit of fun in its own right. They're probably the ship easiest to imagine writing besides kumatani and iketeru and my personal favorite but before we get to that...

The Predatory Gay Man I Must Mention For The Completionist In Me

ok look. homophobic caricature he may be. but i said I would catalog all gay subtext in uramichi and imo on this website gay subtext include gay text (hxh moment) and capellini furitsuke is in fact. gay. and a horrible predatory man the likes of which rival your worst coworker. And probably beat him.

he torments the men around him and forces them to engage in behavior they're not interested in. i cite here usahara and saito's mistreatment but there might be more I missed.

like you can't describe capellini's behavior as anything but horrid and disgusting. i'll call uramichi onii san many things - particularly pro-lgbt in terms of rep isn't close. Still love it in general - and I'm pretty sure the author himself is gay given the ludicrous amount of male character thirst traps he draws - but i don't think he likes that about himself tbqh. But I don't really know him - just go on his twitter now and then.

Finally, the moment I've been waiting for but you all don't realize is coming maybe idk

Uramichi and Kikaku - a mostly one sided love story

This relationship isn't so much implied as it is easily ignorable yet true: it is obviously intended to be read as a love story of sorts, whether it be a gag about how lonely uramichi is and how he needs some emotional connection, or just plain 'he's gay'. This is literally the only guy who gets the door to Uramichi's heart regularly attempting to open treatment, let alone the fact that when Kikaku begs Uramichi to help him out with work he always agrees...maybe more so due to fear than genuine care but still.

there's probably more examples, but these are enough to prove my point imho

he also invites Kikaku to the first end of year party (there aren't any others at the time of writing, specifying in the case of a reader from the future)...or attempts to. Not to Saito Uebu or any other staff member - perhaps because he expects the ones he's closer to already be there, but still - specifically the guy who's only ever bothered him to help complete his work. It's what being horrifically lonely and dick brained does to you (i would know that best).

which leads to yet ANOTHER HEART DOOR SCENE THING

so uh yeah. uramichi's constant giving in to kikaku i think makes more sense if we consider the (slight) romantic inclination he ""might"" have for him.

BONUS: Uramichi and Utano had a moment that was pretty cute but not enough to qualify as subtext in my eyes because they kind of have no chemistry in canon so i still get to title this gay subtext but I also like them

[youremyheaven]

https://www.tumblr.com/youremyheaven/754446269650452480/they-dooo-notice-everything-i-love-it-sometimes

Jupiter women can lowkey be like this too. Idk about the Freud stuff, but jupiter is the husband. When their dad fails to display positive jupiter traits and becomes arrogant, withdrawn and selfish, they become their own dad. So they embody or atleast attempt to embody positive jupiter traits of generosity and virtue. Now that I’ve typed that out, it doesn’t sound as relevant as it did in my head 😭

However I do think that what OP was describing is more of a Bharani thing than anything else. I’m sure other venus naks do it too but still.

Bharani has major connotations to childbirth and so many women make sacrifices when they have children, some are forced to leave education, some develop long term health problems, and some struggle to leave difficult relationships since children complicate that kind of thing. Before medicine advanced it was somewhat common to just die entirely bc of childbirth.

So therefore I think a lot of Bharani natives (esp moon bc we’re talking about mothers) are overly aware of the sacrifice their mothers made and it weighs on them. It becomes their “burden” as the translation of Bharani, “she who bares” takes on a literal and metaphorical interpretation. So basically Bharanis like to acknowledge the people who came before them and their sacrifices but they can have a bit of a chip on their shoulder bc of it. Inheriting their karma in a sense.

So when they experience that humiliation from their abusive parent they “eat the pain” as part of the burden they bare. Fighting back will always lead to more suffering for them despite their anger and resentment (aries). In mythology Yama was about to kick his mom but even though he holds himself back, she still cursed his foot.

Yama’s father ☀️ ☀️ also got mad at his mother for struggling to look directly at him and cursed Yama as a result, which is such a good example of the dynamics their parents have and how they suffer from it.

In conclusion, Bharanis are stoics become pushovers with daddy issues. Sorry for the unsolicited lecture, it may happen again

Nahh you're right. Jupiter women and their daddy issues are well documented (by me lmao 🤣🤡) they do become excessively giving because their dad's weren't giving at all 😤

Jupiter is a masculine planet for a reason after all. Reminds me of Rekha, Purvabhadrapada Moon. She and her siblings were the illegitimate children of a famous actor and he never acknowledged them publicly. Her mom had many other kids from other relationships etc and they were dirt poor. Rekha even went to school with her father's legitimate kids and other kids in school knew about the whole situation and called her a bastard 🥺🥹

She started acting at the age of 13 to support her ailing mother and 6 or 7 siblings. She hated being an actor and was severely exploited in the industry, esp since she had no mentors or father figures :(((( in turn she made sure none of her siblings ever had to work in the movies to make a living and supported everyone financially until they settled down 🥺 she in turn never got married or had kids :((( (she was manipulated into marrying a guy once and he committed suicide and she was hella traumatized by that as well, but that's a separate story 💀)

Here's a pic of Rekha with some of her siblings (2 or 3 are missing in the picture)

She does embody that Jupiter woman being the man trope.

(This is Rekha & her mom Pushpavalli)

Despite everything, she's never spoken ill about her father or even her mother, who clearly made her the scapegoat and placed undue pressure on her to provide even though she was a literal child. She even named her house after her mother 🥺

Anywaayyyyyssss

I agree that Bharanis are in a unique position because of their mythology and in general I think Bharanis are more dignified and humane than other Venus naks

They're outcaste naks who know what it's like to be the outsider and work their way up

But yes they're pushovers with daddy issues 😭😭😭😭

I lowkey like how empathetic they are to women bc of what they saw growing up 😔😔 like they're genuinely just like "no this is not how it should be, women need to be worshipped period, my woman will never suffer this way" and 🤧🤧😩😩😩i fall for that shit lmao

I had a recent experience with a Jupiter conjunct Purvashada Rising man who thought that broke men did not deserve to have women 💀💀💀 he said men who cannot provide have no business dating or marrying 💀💀and that "real men" should never ask for a 50-50 and put the burden on his partner and if he truly loves her, he should want her to be relaxed and enjoy life. He said things like "what's the point of me working so hard if my family isn't enjoying themselves and having a good time, my wife can do whatever she wants and I'll support her but she will never have to work to pay the bills" and ngl I love this mentality lmfao 😂🤣🤪🤭

Venus men being scarred by incompetent dads and overcompensating by being the provider and father they never had is >>>>> 🥵🥵🥵🥵so sexy of them tbh

[mckitterick]

Seek Wonder, Not Happiness

We have so many types of initiatives – self-help books, programs, and even careers – centered around achieving happiness. This is a problem, as it forces us to interpret our experiences through a single – often overrated – emotional lens.

In this video (full transcript at link), Monica Parker argues that we should instead should pursue wonder, which is neither wholly positive nor wholly negative.

Parker likens the feeling of wonder to watching a butterfly emerge from a chrysalis – it is beautiful, complex, and even a little scary. This profound mix of awe, curiosity, and fear, is something that, when achieved, can expand our resilience and deepen our interpretation of the world around us.

The key to wonder? Slowing down. She argues that tuning into our three types of “wonderbringers” – natural, social, and cognitive – and incorporating “slow thought” activities into our lives, can help us be more receptive to wonder and the benefits it provides.

Rather than single-mindedly pursuing happiness, we ought to instead fill our days with things that spark wonder and fuel our curiosity and passions, which can help us overcome emotional barriers and live truly fulfilling, wonder-full lives.

The foundation of speculative fiction (to my mind) is what has long been called "Sensawunda," the opening of doors in the reader's mind they didn't even know were there. Fiction that evokes this sense puts the reader in a position from which they can see humankind from a new perspective.

In fiction, the sense of wonder can lead to conceptual breakthroughs inspired through paradigm shifts or shifts in perspective - time, distance, fantastic worlds, vast or microscopic scales, the Other, and so forth - that lead the audience to see things and even themselves in a fresh light.

In life, this kind of perspective shift can open our minds to the wonders of the cosmos, from its most minute building blocks that shape matter itself to the hidden structure of the universe and beyond into the multiverse. Shifts in perspective are necessary to understanding the natural world as well - science rises from the foundation of sensawunda. Personally, this feeling reveals aspects of the human condition inaccessible to the self-centeredness that can be difficult to see beyond in our mundane lives.

As a child, this is what drew me to watching ant hives do their thing, to reading books about dinosaurs and astronomy, to buying my first telescope to explore the universe first-hand, and to forming a high school science club. Once I discovered it was a thing, seeking the sense of wonder drew me to reading science fiction, then writing it, and eventually teaching it.

Even if I wasn't aware of it, I think seeking the sense of wonder shaped my whole life - it's what brought me to Lawrence, Kansas, in 1992 to begin studying with SF Grand Master James Gunn, then to helping him run his SF Center for decades, and recently to forming the nonprofit Ad Astra Institute for Science Fiction & the Speculative Imagination (@adastra-sf here on Tumblr) to better focus on sharing the sensawunda with others, including helping writers do the same, creating as big a wave of sharing this sense with more people through the fiction my students write.

I hadn't thought of it as an alternative life-path to seeking happiness until reading Parker's piece, but she's onto something important. Happiness is elusive and fleeting, while sensawunda opens the mind and grows our individual universe.

If happiness is what you seek - or at least the absence of unhappiness or freeing yourself from the kind of emptiness that comes with depression or existential dread - seeking the sense of wonder is possibly your best path in life. And far more reliable than directly seeking nebulous "happiness."

Watch those bugs and imagine their lives. Watch birds fly and imagine how the air feels to them as they use it to control their world. Watch meteor showers and picture the billions of years those grains of comets have been orbiting the Sun. Study the layers of sediment laid down over millions of years and touch the fossilized remains of beings who lived long before humans walked this planet. Explore the human world to see new places and meet new people unlike those in your prior world. And, yes, read fiction that shifts your perspective like this wrapped in exciting and compelling narratives.

Open your world to new perspectives, open your mind, open your heart, and feel your soul soar on wings you didn't know you have. Seek the sense of wonder, not because it'll make you happy (though it might), but because you have no idea what you'll find.

And what you discover could be the most wonderful treasure in the universe.

[ladysternchen]

Alright. Now, this is gonna be long. And passionate. And the second rant I've written in an unusually short time. But today, I just about reached breaking-point.

Why the hell does the Silm-fadom do to Elu Thingol what it does to Elu Thingol. To be fair, it's not solely him, Elwing gets it far worse (what for????), but that's a post of its own. No, honestly. What the fuck is going on in the minds of people who demonise one character so much while totally glossing over EVERY character fault of others?

Now, don't get me wrong, as much as he is my favourite character in all I ever read or watched in my life, I know full well that Elu's no saint. He makes terrible mistakes, and he behaves at times in ways that make me want to forget that he's my fave. I also admit to reading/interpreting him a little differently from most people in the fandom (you know, being autistic sometimes comes with having a different view on people's motives and behaviours), but my opinions and headcanons are still canon-based. That's kind of the beauty of the Silmarillion with its very shallow character-descriptions, that it allows for various interpretations. That some are more apologetic than others is a result of that, and what in truth makes this fandom so very interesting. So being critical towards him is not at all what I am ranting about here.

But there is a difference between being critical and demonising.

I read a fic today that honestly shocked me to the core. And just in case author should come across this post and recognise their work in this text, please know that I am in no way criticising your story- on the contrary, it was a very good read, I found Elu as the narrating character to be hugely in character and perhaps in other circumstances, I would have quite liked it. I would have written that to you directly on AO3, but I know that critical comments are usually not well-received, and I also really didn't want to pester you about it. After all, it's don't like don't read. So to cut this short, my problem lies NOT with the fic, but with the reactions to it. And it really only was the final straw.

AND, had it been intended as a parody on fanon regarding Elu Thingol , it would have been spot-on as spot-on can be. It was basically saying that each and every thing that went wrong in FA was Elu Thingol's fault. The second and third kinslaying his fault, the deaths amongst the Noldor his fault and so on. And he drew the appropriate conclusions at the end. For which he was called a coward in the comments. And the thing is, that story is fanon on him in a nutshell. The Noldor are always depicted as the victims. And while I'm totally fine with that, be the fuck as apologetic to all characters, fandom.

Like, I'm totally fine with excusing the actions of the Noldor by mental health or just mistakes made or curiosity or hot-temper or a specific view on things. Yeah, great. Compassion is such an important element in all Tolkien's works that I am always in favour of displaying it also in the fandoms concerning his legendarium. But you can't just do it on one people. You can't depict Maedhros as the tragic hero while at the same time condemning Elu Thingol for naming the Silmaril in a flash of impulsivity, when he was telling Beren to begone. Yes, that was idiotic, yes, he was in the wrong there, yes, what happened after was totally a result of that mistake. But still I daresay that he was punished for that in the most terrible way possible, which was the death, the ultimate death, of his only child.

You cannot pass over the Noldor invading Elu's lands and then claim that the ban on Quenya -a language that had by then already been replaced with Sindarin in mixed settlements because Sindarin was easier for the Noldor to learn than Quenya was to the Sindar and Nandor- is cultural genocide.

you can't claim that the kinslayings were caused by Elu and Dior and Elwing's refusal to hand over the Silmaril, that they positively forced the Fëanorians' hands, and at the same be very understanding about the dwarves murdering Elu (yeah, he insulted them, is was an absolute arsehole there, but that still is no excuse for murder)

You can't go saying how the Oath drove the sons of Fëanor to all their actions and then be convinced that what made the Silmaril such a trap for Elu to be nothing but greed.

And just so I make my point completely clear, I am all for being apologetic. About Fëanor and his sons, about Eöl, about the smiths of Nogrod, be apologetic about Sauron and Morgoth even if you can find that in canon for yourself, or if you just happen to feel those characters. Be open and curious about the apologies other people have for their favourite characters. But apply those rules to ALL characters.

Honestly, please stop. Please, if you want to hate Elu, to which of course everyone is entitled, hate him for what he canonically does. Don't make up stories about him just to make him look worse. You know, you can love your faves without having to demonise others.

And please, if you need to vent your feelings about Elu Thingol... tag it as such. It's so so so annoying to try and find content about your character and then get nothing but bashing or the same half-truth repeated again and again and again without further evaluation.

(Even better, stop hating all around. Yeah, it's just fictional characters. But you know, courtesy to the internet, real people look a whole lot like fictional characters. Judging, demonising, bashing, scapegoating, that all works on real people (or peoples!) just like it works on fictional characters. And the trouble is, real people might react in real life just as Elu reacted in the aforementioned fanfic and take their own life. Only that in real humans, dead is dead.)

[so-i-grudgingly-joined-this-site]

Dream-Killing Bitches, Evil Exes, and Bad Moms: Portrayals of Women in "The Kindly Ones"

So, I've been attempting to write a more formal meta about this for months, but I've not gotten it to ever gel properly, so I thought I'd share my thoughts more informally here.

COMICS SPOILERS AHEAD

Basically, there is something really weird about how women are treated in The Kindly Ones arc of The Sandman.

The semi-official guidebook "Sandman: King of Dreams" basically called The Kindly Ones a #GirlPower arc, but I don't find much particularly empowering about it. Lyta literally goes insane from the stress of being a single mother, albeit exacerbated by supernatural forces. Thessaly is a TERF bitch who serves the role of "spiteful ex" to the protagonist. Nuala is passive and sad and ultimately just pushed around by the whims of the men around her, and when she finally makes a choice of her own it kills the person she cared about. Rose's quarter-life crisis is miraculously "solved" by an unplanned pregnancy. Chantal and Zelda die of AIDS. Even the unstoppable Furies are ultimately a tool in a man's orchestrated suicide-by-magical-cop.

Maybe this is a leftover from when the books were written? Maybe this was the epitome of feminism in the 90s? Or maybe the guide was meaning that the women were powerful as in LITERALLY powerful...women sure do wield a lot of deadly strength and magic in this, even if none of them are particularly EMpowered, if you catch my meaning.

There's also layers as to how we're supposed to interpret this in relation to Morpheus, our doomed protagonist. I've written previously about how we might be intended to see him as an unsympathetic misogynist. If that's the case, then perhaps his doom at the hands of multiple female forces is supposed to be karmic and positive, no matter how questionable those women are. Support for this interpretation is the myth the old ladies (a manifestation of the Kindly Ones?) tell Rose, wherein a deceptive man who abuses and kills his wife meets a karmic comeuppance at the hands of his magically transformed daughters and resurrected wife.

There's also the fact that Overture reveals that Morpheus has MASSIVE issues with his mother. If one decides not to interpret Morpheus's death as a suicide, there is the possible alternate explanation that he frankly underestimated Lyta's threat level to him. Having never experienced a mother's unconditional love, he couldn't fathom that a mother could love her kid enough to literally go insane and kill gods over them.

But even as motherhood is a negative path to stress, insanity, and threatening the fabric of the universe, it's also VERY uncomfortably presented as a cure-all. Rose only gets her heart back by getting knocked up, and we're supposed to see Lyta's suggestion of an abortion as further continuance of Lyta's madness. But of all people, Lyta knows what she's talking about! She knows how difficult single motherhood is! She was going mad even before supernatural intervention... In fact, multiple sequences in The Kindly Ones make it ambiguous what elements are supernatural and what are just her mind interpreting mundane signs as godly while cracking under realistic stress!

This goes outside of the arc I chose to focus on, but I also can't help but contrast the two lesbian couples: Foxglove and Hazel vs. Chantal and Zelda. Foxglove and Hazel end up on the path of traditional motherhood, down to having to choose a child over a career, despite being lesbians! Meanwhile, Chantal and Zelda, as mentioned, die horribly of AIDS. The paths for women are motherhood, tragedy, madness, or some combination thereof.

I'd almost say that the ultimate message of The Kindly Ones regarding women is "no matter what type of woman you are, things will go horribly for you, you cannot win, and no matter what you are at the whim of a violent patriarchal system. The closest you can come to 'winning' is unfortunately by playing into the male-POV fantasy of devoted motherhood." But. like. that was DEFINITELY NOT THE INTENDED WRITTEN MESSAGE. BUT THAT IS THE MESSAGE THAT RESULTS.

Forget asking if Morpheus is a misogynist, the NARRATIVE ITSELF of The Kindly Ones pushes misogyny more than any individual character does!

tagging those who I know like discussing/reading meta:

@serenityspiral @orionsangel86 @violetoftheendless @duckland @notallsandmen

[pinksilvace]

Fern guides their mutuals and followers through Cats 1998 as if we're all sitting on the same couch watching it and I'm shouting out stuff (4/?)

MASTERPOST

Character Wiki Pages

On to Bustopher!

8: Bustopher Jones

Everybody is SO MEAN about Bustopher Jones (joking). I love him so much but nowadays when numbers are cut his is usually one of them since he usually shows up once and disappears 🥲

The actor for Bustopher sometimes dons a chorus costume for the opening number, often named Peter. They're also usually the actor who plays Gus later, as both Bustopher and Gus traditionally had operatic moments in the show.

Tom Hooper clearly did not know how to interpret media because could you IMAGINE 2019 Bustopher cleaning up his appearance as a first impression???

When I was little, I was under the impression that Bombalurina, Jenny, and Jellylorum all liked Bustopher Jones in similar ways; it wasn't until I started interacting with the fandom on here that I learned how some people interpret Bombalurina as being completely sarcastic in this song. Art's always up to interpretation, of course, and that's the fun of it, but I never really got that impression, even with Rosemarie Ford's eye rolls. To me, this moment shows Bombalurina as a character that can show others respect. It also cements her as being at the older end of the "not-old" adults.

This is YET ANOTHER song that is PERFECT for examining whatever Pouncival is getting up to at a given moment. I am once again saying that the Pouncival cut in this show is the most fun

Subsequently, this is also the "Skimbleshanks is three wrong moves away from a panic attack" song, which to me means that he respects Bustopher just as much as Jenny does. I like to think that they grew up together.

(For an incredibly anxious Skimble, here's Boston 2007; skip to 28:30):

(While I'm at it, there's this part in Moscow 2005 when the boys are all lined up like they're going to take a family photo, and I think it's very silly and cute; skip to 27:45)

Have you ever watched Cats (1998) and wondered who that cat that's really excited to see Bustopher is? That's George. The George Cut (TM) is probably my second favorite version of '98, after The Pouncival Cut (TM).

No doubt, you'll notice the number of Mistoffelees & Bustopher moments in this number. This is probably where the most popular headcanon about Bustopher originates: lots of us like to think he's an uncle, usually in conjunction with monochromatic siblings (Misto & Victoria & sometimes Alonzo)(Alonzo is like. Y as a vowel). I've also seen some folks frame him as Misto's dad, and in those cases, Misto is usually an only child.

Slightly off-topic, but my friend @thepineconelord likes to think of Mistoffelees as butler-core, and I think they're especially correct in this number.

(Yet another side note: the monochromatic siblings staging is a bit stronger in post-US Revival choreography, especially between Alonzo and Misto. Head to 30:00)(<- pretending to see things that supports the tunnel vision)

(Is it obvious yet that I've watched this number, specifically, many times?)

Okay I only just noticed this one but WHAT is up with Plato in this part. This picture doesn't do nearly enough justice to his posing but. My dude are you okay??? He was built to have an arm slung over the back of a park bench and instead he's here and forced to harmonize

The rare moment when Mistoffelees is peeved by Pouncival (and the altogether common moment where Munkustrap is also peeved by Pouncival)

One incredibly interesting thing about this number is that it's one of the most gendered numbers in the whole show, speaking from a choreography standpoint. When I was younger, I thought it came from a position of "all of the girls have crushes so they're all fangirling together," but that's not true. Only Jenny is shown to have a crush, and Coricopat, George, and Skimbleshanks could all very easily start fanboy-ing with them.

What is it, then? Is it because Bustopher presents as a much more "traditional" character than the rest? Do the things they're describing about him ascribe to him a certain level of masculinity that he can only share with the boys? Are these formations all part of some sort of militaristic protocol? Leading from that, is his appearance at the Ball (and approval) a right of passage thing for the boys? It's not something I've really seen anybody touch on, which is odd to me, because Cats in general tends to have interesting messages re: gender roles, especially with Mistoffelees, who obviously shares some sort of close connection with Bustopher! GILLIAN LYNNE REVEAL YOUR SECRETS

The cats know what golf is. Either that, or Bustopher saw a rich person play it, decided to copy them, and everybody else is amazed for his benefit.

[allthefujoshiunite]

Hi, Nora....My friend and I made a list of ace and aro characters from BL, and then we get to Love For Sale. We think Sieon is aro, based on he never regret his previous relationships until he is with Namwoo. And how he felt so indifferent about them. But what do you think? Also, do you have any BL characters that you think are ace or aro?

Great question! And thank you for giving me a chance to talk about Sieon. I'm always happy to do so. If you want the tl;dr answer, I don't consider him to be one. However, as is always the case on Wild Wild Web when you express a thought or preference, people take it as me condemning all the other thoughts/preferences. So here's a PSA: if you consider him Aro, good for you! You can interpret him however you like.

Also, lots and LOTS of spoilers for the uninitiated.

As for how I read his character. I think Sieon is hard to understand for a lot of people because they expect him to be either this or that and try to put him into categories he doesn't fully belong in. It's one of the reasons why I'm so enamored with Love for Sale as a whole, and Sieon in particular. Dal Hyeonji, even though this is their first commercial BL work, does an absolutely fantastic job in this character study.

Back to the point. When the story was still being released, I entertained a similar idea myself about him that, maybe he's demiromantic. Not a romance-aversed aromantic, but still a part of the spectrum. Then I kind of abandoned that as well.

We are a melting pot of our environments, cultural codes, family, and our characteristics. That's why most of the time, it's hard to make out whether you've become something due to some external force or you were that something before anything else. A very lame example would be, do I find red lipstick sexy because I find it arousing, or is it because it was marketed in such a way that I am conditioned to think it's sexy? Similarly, it's not always easy to tell apart whether your feelings are genuine, you feel like you have to feel certain ways towards certain people, or something impacted you in such a way that you don't feel a certain way anymore. I know I'm being vague but hopefully, it'll make more sense now.

Sieon, having to shoulder her mother's emotional well-being and their reversed parent-child roles, has found himself in a position where he seeks gratification through the things he can provide to his partners so he can feel 'needed'. The comfort he can provide for his partner becomes his purpose to be in that relationship. I was throwing him bombastic side-eyes very early into the story where he never expressed any type of preference and was very evasive whenever Namwoo tried to probe. Naturally, it was quite frustrating for Namwoo. As for me, it was as if Sieon was trying to erase himself from the relationship and be there for Namwoo as a combination of 'bank account + lips to kiss + a hand to hold' and blend into the ether as a person.

That's also why his relationships ended the way they did. He knew his mom wasn't happy, and even if he tried to alleviate her pain, it ultimately didn't work, thus, the one last good deed he could do for his mom was to let her go. To not be greedy. To not be selfish and say "I need you, don't go." This is the root of his letting go of his exes 'too easily', rather than him not 'loving' his partners.

Here's where things get tricky. Ideally, a romantic relationship requires you to be vulnerable, communicative, diplomatic, etc. Ideally. But none of us are exempt from carrying our baggage with us into the next relationship, no matter how big or small. In that sense, should we say that just because Sieon hasn't been perfectly vulnerable or has been avoiding conflict, he was never in a real relationship before? I don't think we can. 

One of the moments my heart ached for him was during his conversation with his close friend. He reiterates it later on when they're having the talk with Namwoo, but he desperately tries to convey that, no matter what his partners felt, whether they were satisfied on their own account or not, he was always genuine. Has always been. It may not fit the mold of grandiose, shouting-from-the-mountaintops, I'd-swallow-a-sword-for-you kind of love we are constantly sold in the romance genre, but that doesn't mean he isn't capable of love either. On the contrary, I think he does look for romantic companionship, but he just doesn't know how not to intellectualize his feelings.

So, in my opinion, "he didn't love anyone else before Namwoo" is not exactly the correct way to read him. Up until Namwoo decided that he was going to hold onto Sieon and 'show him a selfish love' in Sieon's mom's words, their relationship was following the pretty much same direction as the others. At first, Namwoo is content with what Sieon provides, but then he develops feelings for him and expects Sieon to return them in a way he can't. The same old story that is bound to end with a break-up.

Emphasis on 'in a way he couldn't'. The way I read it, his way of loving is different from what others deem as 'romantic love', so he's convinced that he can't reciprocate others' feelings. If that's love, and his feelings don't look like that, then he must not be in love after all. And when Namwoo shows Sieon that it's okay to be needy and selfish at times, and it's okay to be vulnerable and honest, we see that was the wake-up call he needed all along. 

The verdict? If you consider his past partners through the "he wasn't able to genuinely love them" lens and interpret his "not being able to reciprocate romantic feelings" literally, you can think of him as an aromantic who's not really averse to dating. But as I've tried to elaborate, rather than not feeling romantic love, he does feel love and seek companionship but doesn't know how to handle conflict and can't break free from the behavioral patterns ingrained in him in childhood. 

About aro/ase characters in BL. There's only one work that comes to mind which, interestingly, makes asexuality/demisexuality one of the core themes it explores and that's This is Love by Ziki Masaya. I have reviewed it before (click me) and I highly recommend it! I can maybe mention Sangwoo from Semantic Error, but then again, I think he's just autistic and his approach to romantic love for another guy is different from his normie boyfriend Jongchan because of that. I can't really think of any other works with Aro/ace characters as there's always romance/sex involved. Or maybe I just haven't paid enough attention! Let me know about the list you two came up with ~

PSA: I added the intro because the original link needs you to login to Lezhin as it's a Mature title, but you know the drill. Read on the official platfrorms!

[celticcrossanon]

BRF Reading - 11th of January, 2023

This is speculation only.

Cards drawn on the 10th of January, 2023

Question: What will be the end result of this (book and interviews) for Harry?

Sorry for dodgy formatting, this is copied and pasted to get it up while tumblr is working for me!

Interpretation: His wrongdoings will be exposed and there will be messages to him from England.

Card One: The Six of Cups, reversed.

The Six of Cups is the card of childhood, the past, nostalgia for the past. Reversed, it means you are living in the past, or you are not seeing the past properly, or you have cut yourself off from the past.

The energy from this card is that Harry is living in his past, but it is a past that he is not remembering clearly. He is seeing it the way he wanted it to be, not the way it was. Some things are glossed over and other things are magnified out of proportion to their importance at the time. Harry's view of his past is a distorted one, and it is that distorted view of the past that he is wrapping around himself and inhabiting each day instead of putting it in the past, where it belongs, and living in the present.

Card Two: The Seven of Swords, reversed.

The Seven of Swords is the Thief card, the card of illegal or criminal activity, and when it is reversed, you are found out. it can also be a card of self deception when it is reversed. Both those energies are coming through here.

Harry is deceiving himself. He is living in a made up world and not in reality, and he is telling other people about his made up world as if it was the truth in his book and in his interviews. He is going to be found out, and this has already started with people noticing the inconsistencies and outright lies in what he says.

However, being found out is not going to stop Harry from telling his version of events, instead he is going to sink deeper into his self delusions and insist that they are the truth. One of the keywords for this card when reversed is maliciousness, and I think that Harry is going to be more and more openly malicious as he retreats into his fantasy world.

The card shows an armed man sneaking into a city under the cover of night. The energy of the card is that the man is caught, thrown out of the city, and then he returns to try again, is caught again, thrown out with more force, and he returns yet again, is caught again, returns again, is caught again, and this repeats ad infinitum. Each time the man is caught he becomes more determined to succeed in his task by doing exactly the same thing all over again.

Card Three: The Page of Pentacles.

This is my card for England, and that is the energy I am getting from this card (my apologies to Scotland, Ireland and Wales - I know you are part of the UK, however this card says England to me).

Pages are messages, so there will messages from England for Harry. Pentacles are about money and status, so the messages will be about money and status in some way. Pages can also be children, especially earth sign children (Archie, Charlotte and Louis), so the messages may be about one or more of these children, or the child/children may be the reason or part of the reason for the message. The messages feel like they will come from his family (both as family and as rulers) and perhaps the government as well.

As this card is a minor arcana card it is likely that these messages will be delivered privately and not made public.

Card Four: The Chariot, reversed.

The Chariot is the card of going forward, of moving directly to your goal. reversed, it says you are blocked. Harry will be stuck in place, unable to go forward and accomplish his goals (whatever they really are).

The Charioteer drives two horses, the light and the dark, and it is their control of both these horses that lets them move forward. The horses represent our positive and negative attributes and are sometimes called desire and willpower, When one or both of the horses breaks out of their control, both horses go off in different directions and the chariot is overturned. This is what happens when the card is in the reverse. In this case, I feel that Harry's desires and his overindulgence of those desires have increased the strength of one horse at the expense of the other, and the result is an overturned chariot, the horses taking off in different directions, and Harry going nowhere.

The Chariot can be a card of travel and in this case, when it is reversed, the travel is not happening and you are stuck in the same spot. As it comes after my card for England, Harry may find that his plans to travel to England are blocked or stopped somehow.

The Chariot is the card of Cancer, the sun sign of Prince William. In reverse, it indicates two things: firstly, that Harry is trying to put Prince William into a reverse position, as we have seen by his attempts to damage Prince William's reputation, and secondly, that Prince William is done with Harry and will no longer be there for Harry in the future. Their childhood connection has been cut and Prince William is through with Harry.

The picture shows the war god Ares driving the chariot. The reversal shows that Harry's attempts to wage war on the BRF, his father, his brother, and other family members will not work. The attempt will not go anywhere. It is stuck in one spot, just like the chariot in reverse is.

Underlying Energy One: The Ten of Cups.

The Ten of Cups is the happy ever after card, the card of emotional satisfaction, happiness, and joy, especially with your family and/or your romantic partner. Harry thinks that he has the perfect romance and the perfect family. He is living his dream, being the hero and protecting his vulnerable family (in his mind). Cups is the suit of emotions, so all of Harry's responses and input into this situation are powered by his emotions (Cups as the underlying energy). We know that this is an illusion, but to Harry it is his reality. He can not understand why other people can't see how perfect Meghan is and how wonderful his life is. His rose coloured glasses are locked firmly in place and he will fight to preserve his image of how things are, however much reality tries to tell him otherwise.

Underlying Energy Two: The Five of Cups, reversed.

The Five of Cups is a card of sorrow, grief, and loss, particularly of close family members with this card. Reversed, it is the opposite - recovery from loss and grief, acceptance, and moving on. Harry thinks that this is his situation. He thinks that he has recovered from the past and the grief of his mother's death, and he thinks that he has moved on and is now in a healthy and loving relationship. Again, this is thinking powered by his emotions (the suit of Cups) and not reality. We can all see that he has not dealt with his grief over the loss of his mother and is a deeply damaged and somewhat delusional man, but for Harry he is the sane and healthy one, and everyone else are just 'haters' who are trying to bring him down and/or don't want what is best for him. He is blind to the pain he is causing others and he may even think that they are the ones lost in grief and dwelling in the past, while he is the one who has moved on, when in fact the opposite is true.

Conclusion.

Harry is delusional, and he is clinging to his delusions with everything he has. He is lost in the version of the past that he has created in his mind and he lives in this past every day. He is powered and motivated by his emotions. He believes that he is healed of his grief from his mother's death and that he has a loving wife and a picture perfect family that he must protect at all costs.

As a result of his book and his interviews, Harry's wrongdoings will be exposed. This will have the effect of driving him deeper into his delusions as he repeats the same actions over and over again, believing that this time the outcome will be different. He is powered by his emotions so his current 'truth' will be whatever he feels at that time, and that may change from hour to hour (as we can see in his interviews).

Harry will be receiving some sort of messages from England, most likely from the BRF and/or maybe the government. The messages are most likely to be about money and/or status and may concern children, his own or others, in some way. They are more likely to be private messages than public ones.

Harry's final position will be one of being stuck. He won't be able to travel or move from his position. He will be stuck because he has failed to keep both sides of his nature, the positive and the negative/the rational and the irrational/ his willpower and his unbridled desires in balance, so one side will rear up and overturn him. His acts of war against his family and everyone else he has hurt in his book will fail. Finally, he will lose whatever support and sympathy his brother has left for him. Prince William is done with Harry on a personal level (i.e. he may still want Harry to be safe and receiving help, but he no longer views Harry as part of his family, and for a Cancerian that is one of the worst things they can say to you).

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello! It has been fun reading all the different theories and directions chapter 7 can take as well as your thoughts on it! I was also surprised that Lilia announced his departure so soon, and while so far I am personally inclined to believe him about his powers fading due to age, I do wonder if Lilia could be testing Malleus in some way or teaching him a life lesson. Death is a natural part of life, and with the long lifespan of the fae, Malleus is bound to deal with the loss of loved ones/people in general 😔, especially as the next ruler. Lilia could be testing how Malleus reacts to loss as it could be an issue when he takes the crown. That being said, I don't think that Lilia is trying to induce an overblot (but well, who knows haha), but rather highlight the fact that life is not permanent (even for fae) and this cannot be changed (probably), and therefore life and time spent together should be treasured.

Personally, I believe that part of why Malleus is in school is to forge connections but also possibly to learn how to say goodbye (when he graduates), and to treasure the time spent together with peers even if they are not permanent. This is just my interpretation, but Malleus appears to struggle with perceiving time and living in the present moment. As such, he occasionally misses out on opportunities to bond with others or connect with the world. This is likely because he is fae but Lilia does not appear to struggle as much regarding this, so there could be other reasons 🤔. He doesn't appear to value time as much as others do (e.g. dismissing 3 months of internship because it's too short) which is understandable, but I think is something he should value more especially because life is not permanent. So maybe the life lesson Lilia could be imparting to Malleus is that people will come and go and that should be accepted, but it shouldn't stop him from genuinely connecting with others because it will make life better, even if it is more painful.

Sorry for the long ask haha but anyways it's all just opinions/possibilities! I'm very excited to see how the story goes from here. Have a nice day!

I agree with a lot of the points you brought up, Anon! I feel like a lot (and I mean a lot) of the upset surrounding Lilia leaving is because people expect a found family or a close knit group of friends (like Diasomnia) to always be comfy and together. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Part of being a family or being friends is also weathering through the tough times together, even if it is painful in the moment.

Many often forget that sometimes Lilia’s way of teaching a lesson or letting a secret out can be very callous. He was, of course, insensitive to the worry he caused Silver and Sebek while pulling off the prank in Endless Halloween Night, and did not gracefully divulge the truth of Silver’s human heritage to him when initially asked about it (Lilia just went, “Oh, you didn’t notice our ears were different until now?”). Lilia is also notably stern and sharp-tongued when scolding others (ie Leona in episode 2). And remember how hardcore his training was for young Silver and Sebek? Lilia can be so much harsher than he initially appears to be. It is for this reason that it’s possible that his departure is to encourage those remaining in Diasomnia to learn to stand on their own. All three of them are representative of the future of the Briar Valley and of Lilia’s hopes for peace between the races—the future king, a human able to bridge the difference between fairies and non-fairies, and a mixed child of a fairy and a human. But they can’t fully realize their own potentials if they keep leaning on Lilia for support. It’s could be like a case of “touch love”/“if you love them, let them leave the nest” (except it’s Lilia leaving in this case to force their hands).

I think Malleus is specifically in a position where it will be difficult for Lilia to get through to him. His entire existence has been a lonely and isolating one, and it’s hard to get the socially awkward Malleus to open up to others or to have peers approach him due to his overwhelming aura and power. His distorted sense of time also doesn’t help with this, as it leads Malleus to drastically over or underestimating the time he has (ie he mistakes Vil’s magical aging as the result of more time passing than he had perceived, he often misses meetings because he mixed up the date/time, he believes the internship periods are “too short” to learn anything substantial, etc). He cannot enjoy the present moment because (to him) it slips away so fast, and he has an several centuries ahead of him. Now is nothing. Malleus does not value time because he has so much of it left; this is why Lilia’s words strike him at the end of episode 6: others may have life spans far shorter than theirs, but they can still come together to forge strong bonds in the short time that they have. “We live among such creatures, Malleus.” There is value in the quality of time spent together, not just the length of it—that is what Lilia is trying to express to Malleus, who will eventually outlive his classmates.

Lilia has had the worldly experiences and the age to fuel his understanding of the flow of time and how to live peacefully with other creatures, but Malleus has not—and those things cannot easily be taught, and certainly not in the time span of a few years of schooling. This is likely why Lilia goes out of his way to push Malleus to act outside of his comfort zone and to live his school life to its fullest, to go out and talk to people, to journey to new places and to steep himself in other cultures. He wants Malleus to have those enriching experiences because experience is the best teacher.

It is pointed out by the students of NRC that they don’t understand why someone as powerful and as important as Malleus is wasting his time with school. This is also something that Leona mentions in regards to himself; what could they possibly hope to learn from school? They can afford the best private tutors and resources without so much as glancing in the direction of the school grounds. But that’s just it: it’s the social experience of being surrounded by peers and interacting with them, having to work together with them, hearing from all walks of life. These cannot be gained in isolated self study. It’s also true that the negative experiences associated with those things cannot be had outside of school. The good and the bad are a part of life, and Malleus needs to become accustomed to it if he is to become a well-rounded and wise adult like Lilia.

The connections he makes and the good-byes that come with them… they’re important parts of growing up. Even if it hurts now, it’s meant to make you stronger in the long run.

(I’m not saying this is Lilia’s canonical reason for leaving so soon, but that it aligns with Lilia’s philosophy that we know of so far. It isn’t completely out of character for Lilia to announce his departure and to entrust his boys with the future while he is away.)

[thedupshadove]

Lois + Clark roleswap AU (interpret this however you will)

Kala Jor-El lands in rural Colorado, only a scenic drive away from the U.S. Army base where General Sam Lane happens to be serving...

After bringing her back to their residence, Sam felt it was his duty to alert Washington to this clear extraterrestrial presence, and hand the baby--and the shuttle that brought her--over to Area 51 for further investigation. His wife Eleanor had to rather strenuously argue him out of it. What neither of them knew while having this discussion was that one of the abilities granted to Kryptonians by a yellow sun is near-perfect infant recall. After this initial reaction gave way to a childhood of overall better treatment, Lois does love her foster-father. She supposes. But she'll never entirely trust him.

It was also Eleanor who pulled a few favors from her own mysterious circle to have the remains of the shuttle moved to somewhere safe until Lois was old enough to claim it.

Having been raised in crowded environments full of brusque, no-nonsense people, Kala's mask didn't develop in the same way that Kal's did. She tends much more toward overt charisma and force of personality, because surely no one so in-your-face could be concealing anything about herself, right?

If anything, it's Superwoman who's the less assertive persona, since a woman known to be able to crack mountains with her bare hands has to carry herself carefully if she wants people to react with anything other than fear.

Given her renowned beauty and staggering list of accomplishments, it's unsurprising that Superwoman has received romantic overtures from some of the most rich, famous, and powerful men on the planet. But she doesn't want any of them. She wants Clark Kent, the sweetheart of a Kansas-born sci-fi nerd whose overall lack of physical prowess never seems to stop him from trying to talk down a mugger, or pull a child out of the remains of a building ruined by Brainiac.

"I'm not brave, Clark. Nobody with my inbuilt armor and arsenal can be called 'brave'. You've got nothing but your fragile human skin, and you still faced down a squad of Lexcorp goons in the name of letting people know what Luthor's 'charitable donations' were really going to. That's brave."

Clark's background is mostly the same, save for being Jonathan and Martha's biological child. Not needing to hide his powers or cultivate an easily-overlooked persona might make him a little less timid and stammery, but he's still a farm-boy in the big city for the first time, still ridiculously kind-hearted, and still an absolute dork. Also the glasses are real in this version.

Rather than chasing after Superwoman and ignoring Lois, I think the conflict here is that Clark is deeply smitten with both Superwoman and Lois, and his moral code won't allow him to be with either of them while he knows his heart would still be drawn to the other.

As a stepping-stone before telling the truth, Lois might suggest that they go the polyamory route. Clark is skeptical, but says he's willing to try it...as long as the three of them can meet to make sure everyone is on the same page. Whichever persona didn't make the suggestion has to feign unwillingness in order to keep the secret from crashing down too soon.

Lucy would take the role of the Imperiled Civilian more often, I think, now that her position relative to the hero has gone from "My girlfriend's sister and my best friend's girlfriend" to "My sister (and my best friend's girlfriend)". Clark, Jimmy, and Lucy probably get Damsoled about equally (Lucy knows the secret; the other two don't).

[sapphire-writes]

Jo!! Miss!!! Friend!!... I come to you in a time of need. Everyone, gather around. I just finished watching the episode. Mind y'all it's like 7:30 am so my wording will not be wording.

Anyways .. i am just like in a dilemma... Is writing that makes me uncomfortable bad or am I just not seeing a bigger picture?

I think that for Aemond it makes sense. It has been established that Alicent is a shit mom (not saying she hates her kids!!!! She doesn't! But like Cersei proved loving your kids does not a good mother make). She is not affectionate or really knows how to comfort them (it's like losing her mother at a young age and being maritally raped into the role of one kinda stunted her development!)

I can totally see Aemond shedding that arrogant confident super capable persona of his (not that he isn't all the above he just plays it up and uses it as armour) behind closed doors, in a place where HE feels comfortable.

It's just that i H A T E that that person is the woman sexually abused him as a child. Like... I think we are all entitled to that feeling.

I feel very sorry for his character. He was a child he didn't deserve any of it. Much less now deserve to only have a stranger to find comfort in. To be raised in such a family that this is the only logical option for him? Ilhsm, that's devastating.

But i think it makes sense. I hate that he has to be in this position, but i think this whole mess (so uncomfortable a scene) is the point in a way.

Helaena is being exploited by her family and the one to force her in this position is her mother. Alicent feels guilt over the BnC incident and she throws that burden onto Helaena and Criston. Otto started the entire thing and now when his daughter seeks the least bit of comfort he has the audacity to not want to even hear it. Aegon is crying and acting out and still his mother cannot bring herself to give him anything. Not even the slappings she used to. Now she has Criston to make herself feel comforted.

Also the whole scene like... The way it was filmed..idk... And if i understood correctly she tried to like...touch him? And he said not here? Like.. ooooof... Triggering .. okay im not going to touch that one now.. too soon.

But yeah... A man needs his basic emotional needs met and that was his best option.

Idk.. what are you thinking? I think despite the difference in the fanon interpretation of Aemond that emotional core was sth that we all clocked quite correctly. So.. i think the root of his personality is everywhere the same.

Bestie!! Love everything you’ve said and I agree! I can totally see why they went this direction with Aemond, and though im not the biggest fan I can appreciate they’re giving emotional depth to his character.

As for Alicent and Aemonds relationship, I hear what you’re saying but my perception was that Aemond and Alicent were closer than her relationship with the other Targtowers and maybe that’s on me, my fandom goggles on again, so the mommy issues is throwing me a bit— it feels more Aegon coded idk!

I agree— I think it’s super uncomfortable to watch Aemond seek comfort from his abuser and at the same time very realistic!

I’m interested to see where this goes for sure and trying to take off my fandom goggles 😂

[babyspacebatclone]

I made a comment yesterday about Catra from SPoP having a lot of the same traumas as my brother.

It reminded me of something.

I babble, so the story is below the cut.

But it exactly describes why I, personally, am unsatisfied with the “closure” shown in canon in regards to Catra having a healthy relationship with Adora - any kind of relationship - with the state of self-awareness she ends the series on.

TL;DR:

If my brother interprets something innocent I say as an “attack” on him, there is no winning for me to try and change his mind.

Having a third party attempt to change his mind is most likely to just add to his trauma of me being the “golden child” growing up, which I’ll discuss at the end of the post below.

And my brother interpreting statements from other people, not just me, as a personal attack is not an unexpected occurrence.

Link to a different example that expands on the kinds of things he’ll get into this state over….

I’ll start that my younger brother’s and my history of emotional abuse from a parent figure (our biodad) is many order of magnitudes below Catra’s and Adora’s. And this is not an “obvious” statement if you don’t know me, because sadly there are examples of child abuse out there to be found that surpass Shadow Weaver….

Nevertheless, we very much developed very similar trauma responses and issues: I was the “golden child,” someone who tends to be submissive and helpful as a temperament, lucky enough to find things like school easy; my brother struggled more with his anger, school, and in general just about everything I seemed to be good at.

Even as a teenager (around 16), I could clearly see a dynamic of “I get more positive attention, he gets more attention.”

I don’t know if it’s personality or trauma based on his part, but I also used to have a “joke” about our belongings: “What’s mine is ours and what’s his I don’t touch.”

Both sides of that were dictated by him.

Nevertheless, I always viewed my responsibility as both the oldest child and “one who had it easier” (like, 10 out of 100 is higher than 5 out of 100….) to take care of and protect him, and it wasn’t until we were about 14 and 16 respectively I started to resent that.

I’d resent how he treated me, sure, but I’d always recognized a lot of his behavior problems were my father’s fault.

Speaking of my father, there’s definitely cycles of abuse here; I never wanted nor could have handled the details, but him being raised by first generation German immigrants and then entering the Canadian Air Force gives me things to suspect.

I also cut ties with him at 24; my brother when he was kicked out of the house by him at 17.

(very very long story; we were living with him after the divorce until Mom could get on her feet)

Anyway…..

We’re now both 40+. In many ways, our relationship has improved - we’re the only ones we’re comfortable with discussing we’re Queer within the family, for example - and he definitely wishes we were closer friends.

In the past few years, I’m slowly losing the guilt over me not feeling the same way.

This is the perfect example why.

It was 2019, my brother was early into a new romantic relationship , and Episode 9 of Star Wars was coming out.

My brother was really excited that me and his then-girlfriend were bonding over both being geeks, and he excitedly invited me to go to an advanced showing of The Rise of Starwalker that was happening in a nearby town.

I had very little interest in actually seeing the movie, and am an Autistic Introvert to his Autistic Extrovert, so none of this really sounded like “fun” to me.

But he was excited, and as sibling outings go didn’t sound painful.

So I put on my big-girl big-sister pants on and agreed.

Something with my family is that the person in charge of an outing drives - which is 100% a control thing, and functionally means if you can’t justify driving yourself my mom or my brother (depending on if she’s involved) is picking you up.

(despite not meeting him until I was 22, my step-father and I are exceptionally similar and neither of us rock the boat there)

Once I finally got a driver’s license at 35, I started to hate this system, but again it’s rarely actually painful and thus not worth making a deal over.

Anyway, on the day my brother comes to pick me up. I technically knew he was picking me up first and then we were going to his girlfriend’s new place, but I hadn’t quite processed that this was a short visit and not just her jumping into the car.

So I got into the back seat so she could ride shotgun when we got to her.

My brother found this hilarious (or maybe was pretending to? idk with him…) and teased me for not getting up front with him.

I work as a daycare teacher, and at that time it probably had been only a month since a lead teacher hd come back from maternity leave, and trying to cover her duties for several months had almost - and I am serious here - broken me.

I remember it taking almost 30 seconds for me to understand what the problem was, and when I did I did not want to have to deal with him laughing at me over something so stupid.

So I said something along the lines of “Opps, sorry, braindead, tired from work.”

I need to emphasize:

All I said was that I was tired and blamed my work.

In response, my brother gave me a cptsd flashback.

I was being shouted at, being told I don’t appreciate how tired he is after his - and he’s right here - physically intensive job, do I appreciate anything….

When confronted with something that reminds me of one of my biological father’s outbursts, I immediately drop into “freeze” out of “fight, flight, freeze, fawn.”

I did not understand why he had taken my statement as a direct attack on him, but he had, this was happening, and there was nothing I would be able to do to stop it.

I sat there, silently crying, waiting to be ordered out of his car because I physically could not move until I was given that.

To my complete shock he got silent…

And started the car.

I felt like I was in a parallel universe.

The raw rage was still radiating off my brother, but somehow he had chosen to drive to his then-girlfriend’s place as planned.

I don’t think I was able to give her the full story, but once I basically said I’d upset him she ripped into him for making me cry.

Kinda wish she hadn’t been such a flake in just about every other regard; a girl needs a strong backbone to survive my brother.

After he’d been calmed down, we were back in his car and driving to the movie theatre half an hour away.

By the time we got there my brother was back to his happy excited persona, very very proud that he had thought of such a cool thing for his two geeky girls to do, and the fact it ended up with us seeing Rise of Starwalker didn’t dampen it.

(I shall say I was not impressed with directions taken in the movie, and my overall impressions are shared by specific segments of Star Wars fans)

However…

I never stopped being upset by the entire thing - specifically, that while my brother had apologized for shouting at me, he never apologized for why he had shouted at me.

And as I said at the top of this post, there is no winning if I were the one to try and bring up how hurtful that had been.

I’d either set him off on the entire “you don’t appreciate me!” thing and, ya know?

No, I didn’t appreciate much about this entire endeavor, I was doing it entirely as a favor to you so you could have a fun night out with me on your terms.

Just because you spend a lot of energy doing something you think someone else is going to enjoy, doesn’t automatically force them into actually liking what you are doing.

Sometimes, you have to do a bit of calculus, and figure out mental energy put in versus mental drain during activity versus outcome, and pick things that have a low net loss in order to be a nice decent human being.

Doesn’t mean it’s still not a net loss.

Having a third party explain to my brother he completely flipped over nothing and not every statement about my life being hard means his suffering is invalidated is thin ice too.

Because that’s exactly what had happened.

The only way my brother can feel secure that his needs will be met is if his suffering is acknowledged as the worse, and therefore will be prioritized.

Just like my biological father’s suffering always had to be prioritized.

Just like I learned somewhere early in elementary school that I had to hide my suffering, because entering into the arena of “who needs attention more?” would only end with more trauma for me.

Just like I learned I had to be satisfied with the positive attention people gave me for doing things they thought were worthy, but also not being a “show off” and actually seek out attention because that made me a bad person.

Because I got the most positive attention.

And my brother got the most attention.

And I understand my brother’s traumas.

And the fact he tried to fix things for me by not canceling our event, does show that he does try and improve things, he does know he’s hurting me.

But I can’t think of how explaining “punishing your sister for you mistaking neutral statements for personal attacks” to him is going to be helpful

unless it’s done by a professional.

And I can’t be involved in it in any way, or else it just quite naturally is going to just add to the existing resentment that neither of us could prevent happening when we were children.

Because, yeah, it’s shitty to realize you’re hurting someone you love because of your mistakes.

It’s not something people want to have to admit.

But both our work schedules got super packed due to COVID.

And I haven’t had a “brother led” activity since.

And I don’t fucking ever want to again.

And I still feel guilty about that.

But a fuck ton less than I did in 2021.

[mangoisms]

there is something so incredibly interesting about this conversation and alfred’s view of bruce wayne and batman… i typed out the entire convo so its all under the cut because it's a Lot (that way no one has to read through the panels themselves. but also after this There are my Thoughts. which there are many)

Alfred: Perhaps it is less than a tragedy that Bruce Wayne’s affairs, for once, have displaced the Batman’s obsession. Bruce: What do you mean, Alfred? Alfred: Sir, forgive me for saying this, and understand in advance that I have had the pleasure of knowing no man more admirable than yourself… Bruce: But—? Alfred: But… Well, sir… As much as Gotham could not survive without the Batman… I doubt the Batman could survive without Bruce Wayne. Bruce: Have I been neglecting my personal relationships that much, Alfred? Alfred: Certainly not with me, sir, and not really with young Jason—but insofar as the Batman must take up much of your time, it is inevitable that Bruce Wayne’s affairs should suffer to a certain extent. You relationship with Miss Vale in particular— Bruce: Yes, I know I’ve been neglecting Vicki—but ever since taking on Jason, my time has been— Alfred: I fully understand, sir, and with luck, so does Miss Vale… But my meaning goes beyond such details, however important they may be. Bruce: And in the larger sense…? Alfred: By his very nature, sir, and necessarily to ensure his success, the Batman is a… a creature of but one overrriding emotion… Supreme outrage. Alfred: His consuming need for justice and retribution is the very factor which encourages his success. Therefore Bruce Wayne represents your positive side… The full spectrum of all your other emotions. Bruce: And I should pay more attention to those other emotions—even when I’m not forced to, as in the current crisis involving Jason? Alfred: It may be selfish of me, sir… Alfred: But I was never more proud of you than when you momentarily ignored the Bat-Signal to concentrate on Jason’s plight. Bruce: And as an ironic result, both Jason and Bullock were almost killed. Alfred: I admit there is that lesson to be learned as well, sir… But the Batman truly is a creature to be feared—even by yourself in the dark corners of your own soul. Without Bruce Wayne’s compassion to balance the Batman’s obsession… I fear the night-creature would devour your very heart. — Batman (1940) #377 

that last part especially is just so interesting. just because i feel it’s so different now?? like how bruce views himself, how everyone else views himself, where we are at the point in which batman is the true persona and bruce wayne is the fake one. like that one panel of diana, clark, and bruce with diana's lasso of truth where they introduce themselves and give out their real names but bruce's answer remains 'batman,' clearly implying that is how he truly sees himself

which i know, i think it was from the new-52 reboot of the league, so whether it was even any good is another question but i do think on the whole, dc has really pushed the whole bruce wayne is the fake side, the batman is the real one and it's not... bad, i guess. but i really like this interpretation so much more? where they are two sides of the same coin? you can't have one without the other and as alfred is saying, you shouldn't

in a way, i think what we have of bruce right now kind of proves alfred's point in how bruce would be consumed by his mission as batman if he neglected the other side of himself. i'm SURE it was not intentional on dc's part and they were trying to lean more into a grittier version of him and emphasize the batman side of him more for the audience but i also think it's what led to the deteroriation to him as a father? like a child - like jason here - doesn't need batman, he needs bruce. and i feel like we do see what happens when they get batman instead of that (like tim and cass; though it is received very differently since tim needs something else but takes it anyway and cass truly doesn't know any better and idk its that post about how bruce enabled her and saw himself in her and YEAH)

and i mean yeah, keeping in mind this is pre-crisis but still. did all of this happen because of jason's death??? maybe so. maybe so. i wanted to say no initially but it really is so impactful for him because like... that was his son. so i do kind of feel like it's safe to say that when jason died, this bruce wayne died alongside him too. idk if any of this makes sense but. yeah. yeah. yeah

[mermaidsirennikita]

Can you rec some books with marriage of convenience/grumpy hero? those are my weaknesses and I do love reading about the love forming slowly, gets me every time

Definitely, dude!

I would for sure recommend several of Stacy Reid's books--she does marriage of convenience really well, and a lot of her heroes are grumpy.

Accidentally Compromising the Duke--heroine intends to "compromise" a friend into marrying her to avoid a planned marriage to a lecherous asshole... But she ends up compromising this intimidating widower duke, who needs a stepmother for his daughters anyway. He's more stern than grumpy, but she interprets his distance as coldness; he doesn't want to consummate marriage because he lost his first wife to childbirth. (He folds like a lawn chair.)

Wicked in His Arms--SUPER grumpy hero here, and he also writes SECRET MYSTERY NOVELS LOL. He dislikes the heroine immediately because she's vibrant and makes him horny, but she's visiting his estate as she looks for a husband. They end up fucking in a closet, and she like, runs out of the closet because that was her whole virginity he just took, and he runs after her, and they basically crash into HIS MOM. The story unfolds from there, he has to totally defrost.

When the Earl Met His Match--maybe my favorite Stacy Reid, but the hero really isn't grumpy for most of the book. The heroine is a society girl pregnant by another man who didn't stand by her, hero is a Scottish viscount whose family is super scandalous and hasn't been in society for years. They'd been exchanging letters as strangers for a while, and she basically shows up proposing a shotgun marriage to keep her baby safe from her horrid parents. He claims the baby as his own, and it's this delicious slow burn. He's mute, and there's some communication issues to get over--she does learn sign, and it's reeeeeally lovely. Picks up angst in the last 1/3.

Magnate by Joanna Shupe. Hero is a cold self made man, business... allies...? with the heroine's brother; heroine is from a more blue-blooded family. She asks him to mentor her in the stock market or whatever, her brother ends up catching them making out and forces the hero to marry her, and a lot of "he wants me but he doesn't love me" stuff follows. Really hot and well-done, and I love the way the marriage unfolds.

The Chief by Monica McCarty. Medieval romance, big stern hero paired with lovely virginal heroine. Issue is that her father wanted them to marry and the hero refused... so the father coerces the heroine into sliding into bed with the hero. He's sleepy and her back is turned and he though his dudes were sending a sex worker anyway, so he kinda.... goes for it, which she didn't expect because she thought her dad would come in before sex is had. Dad purposefully rushes in MID-COITUS and demands a marriage. The hero is cold and doesn't want to love and shit, so while they have really good sex, he withholds emotionally. Also: there's this amazing moment where she tries to give him doggy style sex for the first time, and even though it's normally his favorite position, he gets mad because he didn't get to look into her eyes while she came. I'm trash for it.

The Recruit by Monica McCarty. Another medieval, Robert the Bruce wants the hero and widowed heroine to marry, but she has sex with him knowing who he is while he thinks she's a random maid. He basically implies he'll fuck around, not realizing he's talking to the woman he's supposed to marry, so after he realizes who she is, she refuses to marry him. Then they reunite a few months later, and oops, she's pregnant, and he DEMANDS! TO MARRY HER! The whole situation makes him grumpy and distant at first, but they slowly bond while planning for the baby and stuff. Also, he gets to be a Father That Stepped Up for her firstborn child.

When a Girl Loves an Earl by Elisa Braden. Heroine becomes obsessed with the big, cold Scottish hero who can't love, and basically frames a compromising thing in order to force a marriage. He's real mad about that at first, but like. Partly he's just afraid of marring her with his GIANT SCOTTISH COCK. With good reason, because it does sound kinda massive. I love how batshit this heroine is.

The Truth About Cads and Dukes by Elisa Braden. Classic example. Heroine is actually ruined by the cold hero's stupid brother (not in a sexy way) so the hero steps up and marries her. He's got some issues and is very chilly to her at first, but he's really sexually obsessed with her from the jump. She just doesn't get that because she sees herself as ugly, etc. Great love confession in this one.

The Viscount and the Vixen by Lorraine Heath. Hero's old, wacky father brings in this random woman--he answered her ad for a husband and has signed a contract wherein if she doesn't get a husband with a title, she'll receive a huge payout. Hero is like, "oh fuck no, not my senile dad" and marries her himself, which may have in fact been his (not) senile dad's point lol. He sees the heroine as a fortune hunter, but is obviously super into her from the jump and hides it.

When A Scot Ties the Knot by Tessa Dare. Hero is a grump, PTSD-ridden Scot. The heroine has actually been sending fake letters to an imaginary dude with his name for years in order to avoid suitors, lol, and he received the letters the whole time. She's inherited a castle, so he shows up outta nowhere like "MMMM I THINK IT'S TIME WE MARRY". He's grumpy and it's emotional but light, the way of Tessa Dare.

The Duchess Deal by Tessa Dare. Grumpy scarred hero needs a wife for heir purposes, and his fiancee ditched him due to his scars. The heroine made the wedding dress and shows up wearing it to demand payment, and he's like "fab, let's marry and I'll fuck you with the lights off until we have a baby". He's grumpy, but it's mostly insecurity because, you know, scars.

This Scot of Mine by Sophie Jordan. Hero's family has this apparent curse wherein the men always die before their heirs are born. The heroine faked a pregnancy in order to avoid a bad marriage, so when he meets her he's like oh sick I'll marry her and claim her baby as my heir and I'll never have to worry about the curse because the baby won't actually be mine. She's unaware of this, and they fuck on the wedding night--he realizes she's a virgin and flips. She then gets pregnant lmao, and he's very grumpy because he thinks she BASICALLY KILLED HIM LMAO.

The Duke I Tempted by Scarlett Peckham. Hero and heroine end up getting married for like, practical reasons, and they got along at first... But he's actually sexually submissive, and he's afraid of her finding out, which puts up this wall between them. Super good and kink positive.

The Highwayman by Kerrigan Byrne. Hero is a criminal mastermind and kidnaps the heroine in order to basically convince her to marry him in order to "get this inheritance" she has (there are... other reasons, lol). She's like, fine, but I want a baby and you have to fuck me for that. Problem is, he's incredibly traumatized by his misdeeds (and the childhood SA he suffered, TW) so he doesn't like skin to skin contact... at all. Which means. He fucks her with his clothes on. Wearing leather gloves. A LOT of angst, super good.

Non-historical:

Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopez. Billionaire ice queen CEO heroine proposes a marriage of convenience to the genius prince of this tiny principality. She'll bail out his nation, and he'll give her a baby. He haaaates her at first. Wild, hot, great.