#and he warns u about an enemy scorpion who can fly who will attack you

[vaugarde]

bruno to his skorupi swarm when dusk moves in after he got her pregnant

[polygon-streams]

April 30, 2019 - Mortal Kompat Story Mode Part 3

Content warnings: blood, gore, graphic violence, character death

Link to VOD

Summary: Pat plays Mortal Kombat 11 for the third time, making a good amount of progress and learning new things about the characters

Pat has maintenance workers over, has some sink problems. Issue is that water leaks thru his ceiling when his neighbor takes showers

Doesn’t know who he mains on Mortal Kombat anymore

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE!!!!!!!! (mod MikeAM)

Pat has TWO CANS of drinks tonight (very fizzy)

Does NOT own jorts, “I’m not a jortsman, I’m not allowed to wear jorts” (I think this is a lie), “No jorts allowed, I shall not wear jorts. I wear jants (jean pants).” (This is true)

Pat will NOT install a fart toilet

Drinking a rattler tonight

Babycakesclaire gifted a sub to T-Pain [Watch Clip]

Says people made fun of him for saying “T-Pain” in his Polygon video so many times, says it was a grounding thing to help himself [Watch Clip]

Favorite song by TPain is U Up off of the new album

Says he “has the bad audio”, restarts the stream

Plays as Jax, doesn’t know his combos but figures them out

Asks chat if they would prefer big metal arms or big metal legs; Pat would have legs for The Kick™️

Gives a recap of the plot, says the word “mommy” a lot (that’s just how he is and I accept him)

Likes fight choreo, thinks they hire many professional people to do it

Jacqui is awesome

First Piss clip of the stream

Says “Dad fight dad fight dad fight” as the two versions of Jax fight each other

“I know all my moves, haha!......actually I don’t know any of my moves”

Mains as Jax just to do powerbombs

“This is a stupid looking hat, I’m sorry it’s a dumb looking hat. She deserves a better hat,” at Jacqui’s (sp????) hat.

Someone played Slow Yoshi in the middle of a fight

Jacqui’s dad betrayed her then disappeared. Pat: dads are complicated

Evil lady puts hat on, her power only grows stronger

Chat makes a lot of “I can’t believe you’ve done this” jokes

Pat opens a can of fizzy drink, chat alternates between making “ASMR” and “piss” jokes. Some folley ones too

Game talks about a character “I don’t know who the fuck Kharon is”

Characters descends like spider through the ceiling “oh. Ew.”

Pat makes an “I can’t believe you’ve done this” reference

The two Scropions fight. Pat: “God it’s me but stronger”

Pat wins the first round: “It’s a big fishy”

Gets attacked by other Scorpion w a good combo, wants to learn how to do that

Chat compliments Pat on his Scorpion playing abilities

Pat said he’s going to learn how to main Scorpion and Jax in this MK game. Mained Scorpion in last one

“Be a dude, not a dick”

Scorpion is killed by D’Vorah

“Nobody fuckin believes Scorpion”-- game framed Scorpion to look bad

Pat likes the frog jokes chat is making

“Hey Boy” clip played in a fight against Raiden

Raiden hits Scorpion w a blast as a “truth serum”. Pat calls it a dick move (Chat agrees)

Pat then plays as Raiden, but doesn’t want to because of how shitty he is “Cool. Nunchuck me. I deserve it”

Pat laughs at Piss clip played at a character's dramatic revelation and entrance

Pat: “I’m so confused.” So are we

There are a lot of timelines that explain costume changes

Pat needs to “check in on that toilet update real quick”

Pat as Raiden: “The only solution is that Liu Kang and I must kiss,” asks Faith to make it happen

Evil Lady makes Liu Kang disappear: “Da fuuuuuuqq?”

Chat makes norted memes

Agrees with Faith that the game “feels like fanfic”

Likes the guy who played Liu Kang in the movies; also played a guy named Ricky in another movie

“Yooooo that’s a blood boat”-- a rivaling boat comes up from the middle of the ocean

Praises actions scenes in MK; better than MCU and most action movies in general

Finally goes to check up on the toilet situation, Piss clip plays while he’s gone

Someone checked if there were Liu Kang and Raiden fanfics; apparently, there isn’t

Chat is wondering what happened to Pat’s toilet, “did he poop too hard?”

Pat comes back and asks if everyone was good (probably not)

He thought it was his roomate being a sloppy showerer, roommate asks what was up and Pat said “oh I thought it was you”. Then found water coming from lights on ceiling and got people to fix the problem

We are in the home stretch of MK, according to safetydrew

“Jax is my father”

Jax beats up a bunch of people to ‘make things right’, Pat: “Yes, yes, fuck yes”

Raiden defeats enemy, “caught and compromised” plays perfectly over the scene [Watch Clip]

Liu Kang got norted by himself (absorbed?? Into one body?? I think????)

Liu: “You will have to kill me” Raiden: “I would rather save you” Chat cheers for them to kiss

Raiden and Liu Kang fuse and become a God???? What???????????

Character rips a person’s heart out, Pat: “He just ripped his fucking hort out.” Chat spams “hort”

Super Liu floats in the sky, sends a meteor out and kills a bunch of monsters

Super Liu super punches more monsters

Time starts rewinding, Fire God Liu Kang fights Kitana, then some more people

Lots of fighting in this Mortal Kombat game

During Cetrion fight, Pat: “She just grew a tree just to nail me to it.”

Cetrion gives her soul to Big Evil Lady Mom

MikeAM advises Pat to just do a bunch of flying kicks during the boss battle

“WOW she mean, woofadoof”-- Pat @ the final boss

Pat says he will never fight with honor

Pat fails the fight, Liu Kang gets his head chopped off

Donkey Kong has Died plays as the head rolls (We’ve unlocked the basketball timeline)

Pat thinks about trying the easier mode if he fails a few more times

Hops into the settings to turn on easy mode

Evil Lady (Kronica) turned into Johnny Cage in the middle of the fight??

Fire God Liu Kang and Evil lady go up to spAAACEEEE

Kronica says she’s better than Liu Kang bc he’s a god and she’s a titan?? I thought it went the other way

Pat comments on how it’s weird to have Johnny Cage fight for her at points in the battle

Pat finally wins the match, Kronica gets turned to glass and shattered. The Caught and Compromised clip plays

Now Liu Kang is in charge of watching over the Earth realm, mortal Raiden helps (“Raiden's gonna diiee”)

Game ends just like that, credits roll, Pat: “Oh that’s it, that’s how it ends?!”

Comments on how the next MK can be about literally whatever they want, bc this game set it back to square 1

Cassie apparently has a fatality where she can kick someone in the nuts and have their skeleton pop out “that’s really good”

Pat’s gonna start picking characters to learn moves of and train w them

Pat says apparently there’s three different endings. Not major changes, just is dictated by how long it takes you to defeat the final boss

He got two (2) new maps

Wants to learn the kicking people in the nuts to make their skeleton pop out lmao

“I guess I need to unlock the dick kick”

Does a fatality that involves the character getting ripped in half, then a tomato getting thrown at them

Looked up the Cassie fatality and tries it

Her opponent literally did a piss right before the fight. He really did. Pat lost that fight

Pat messed up the fatality

Decided to try to Krypt before raiding Thomas’ stream

Same actor who played Shang Tsung in the movies played him in the game. Pat geeks out

Pat says this Krypt is better than in other games bc it used to be a dungeon crawl to find things. Now, you just open chests

Pat finds a hammer, uses it to get Koins™

The raid guys should make a MK movie. Apparently the recent John Wick has them fight the raid guys

Pat doesn’t know how much he should drink before going to see the new John Wick. He’s going w Ryan at the Alamo (I assume a theatre)

Pat finds a gong and feels he must hit it with the hammer

Pat says the Krypt changes what loot it has based on what time of day you go to see it

Pat doesn’t know whether or not there’s going to be fights in this area, or if it’s just opening chests

He still thinks he’s going to work w Scorpion and Jax to get good at to learn combos (also probably Jacqui). Wants to do a group play session at some time

Charlie is sneezing!!

Pat’ll be back on Thursday (8 pm EST) with Donk Souls again (if that doesn’t work, he’ll find something else)

Charlie went up on Pat’s lap!!!

Abby streams on Tuesdays at the same time as Pat. He says you should watch both simultaneously

Sent chat to raid Thomas

End of stream