#and hadn't heard of taz yet

[libraryofneith]

Out of Mind - Chapter 10 (Joel Miller x Female Reader)

@hiroikegawa @evyiione @orcasoul @taz-97

I'm baaaaaack! Apologies for yet another delay but I have finished my finals, all set to graduate (hopefully) and that means I have more time for you lovely people. Thank you once again for your patience, please enjoy. Also I'm going to compile a series list with all the chapters since some seem to be harder to find than others.

If anyone else wants to be the first to know when this fic is updated let me know and I'll add you to the taglist.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

Summary: You and Joel deal with the fallout of what happened with Marcus

Warnings: [whole fic is 18+ minors DNI], it puts its age in the bio or it gets the block button, cursing, allusions to PTSD due SA but no actual descriptions of SA, hurt/comfort, Joel is nice for once

You wanted to push him away, to fight him, to tell him to go to hell, but the warmth encompassing you, the soothing words in your ear and the smooth circles on the small of your back were too good to resist.

You

You were on your back. That much you knew. You were in utter darkness, couldn't even see your hand in front of your face, the oppressive weight of nothing surrounding you. There were only two things you knew: you were lying on your back, and somebody's hands were on you. You tried to crawl away but they snuck around your waist and pulled you back. In the darkness you could hear voices whispering.

This'll go a lot easier if you don't fight back…

I'm gonna enjoy this so much more…

This'll go a lot easier…

Sweetheart…

Don't fight back…

Don't…

Fight back…

Hands were grabbing your shoulders now and shaking you violently. You tried to scream, to tell them to stop but your throat was raw and nothing would come out. Instead you thrashed wildly, hands flailing everywhere, connecting with something - chest, arms, face? You didn't care you just wanted out. Then you heard another voice in the darkness.

Kid. Stop.

You turned away, the fear replaced by anger burning hot and sore in your chest. You didn't want him either.

It's OK.

The voice was so soft and so close, right in your ear. You shook your head, your hands still flailing in the dark, looking for anything to grasp, then they found two other hands, holding yours in a firm but gentle grip.

I'm here.

I don't want you here was what you wanted to say, but when you tried to speak nothing came out but sobs, and suddenly you could feel heat and moisture on your face as tears gushed out of your eyes.

Arms were encircling you now and you could feel a hand rubbing slow and even circles on your back. You knew who it was. As the blackness gave way to dark blue, white, grey and the nothingness became trees and bushed and rocks, you remembered where you were and who you were with. You wanted to push him away, to fight him, to tell him to go to hell, but the warmth encompassing you, the soothing words in your ear and the smooth circles on the small of your back were too good to resist. So you allowed yourself to fall into his embrace, head resting in the crook of his neck as your tears continued to fall.

"You awake now hon?"

"Shut up."

"OK."

Joel

It wasn't the first time she'd woken him up. That first night after, well, it had happened, she had slammed her sleeping bag down as far away from him as safety would allow and he hadn't objected, even as they fell asleep to the sound of each other's teeth chattering. He'd woken up who-knows-how-long later to the sound of her crying out. He'd jumped up, thinking they were being attacked by infected or more of Marcus' men but instead it was just her crying in her sleep. She looked like she was trying to hit something or someone but her arms were trapped by her sleeping bag.

He hadn't meant to scare her, he just wanted to wake her, or help get her arms free because at this rate she was going to hurt herself. But the minute his hand made contact with her shoulder, her eyes snapped open and her fist made contact with his nose.

"Ow, shit, what was that for?"

"Don't. Touch me" She spat, eyes filled with venom.

"I was only trying to.."

"I don't need your help. I don't want your help. I don't want anything from you." Joel flinched.

Her words had cut him deeper than he'd admit even to himself. But he didn't want to sleep with a broken nose every night so he did as she said, he didn't go near her. Even when the sound of her teeth chattering kept him up, even when she thrashed about so wildly she had bruises the next day, even when he could hear her crying in her sleep, and even when he could see bags under her eyes and her skin grow pale from exhaustion.

Until tonight. He was astonished when she put her sleeping bag next to him, but she'd simply glowered and said "it's too cold to sleep separately. This is just so I don't have to listen to you shivering all night. Got it?" He'd nodded. Got it.

And that's how he'd woken up to an elbow in his gut as she flailed helplessly. He'd tried to leave her alone, but this didn't seem to be going away, and he realised, with a stab of guilt, that it was probably worse because she was making prolonged physical contact for the first time since the attack. And that's when he decided, screw it. He couldn't leave her like this anymore. She could hit him if she wanted, which she did as he tried to wake her up. Shaking her only made it worse so he did the only other thing he could think of, something that he was sure would earn him a verbal or physical lashing later, and he took her into his arms, held her, stroked her back and whispered "it's OK" over and over again until her body relaxed and he could feel a wet patch where her face met his shoulder.

"You awake now hon?"

"Shut up."

"OK."

There she stayed, not saying or doing anything. He wasn't sure what to do, what she wanted, but when he slowed his circles on her back, she mumbled "don't stop" into his chest, so he kept going until her breathing evened out and her quiet snores indicated that she had finally fallen into deep and undisturbed sleep, but even then he didn't stop. He just held her, listening to her snores, crickets chirping, birds starting to sing in the early hours of the morning. He was almost starting to fall asleep himself when he spotted the first snowflake.

Shit.

"Get up." She gave a muffled groan of protest. "C'mon, we gotta move." She blinked slowly then shot up.

"What is it, what's wrong?" Her face was panicked.

"It's just snow. We'll live but we have to keep moving, maybe find some real shelter." If Joel remembered right there was a cabin not too far away that was (usually) abandoned.

She groaned and he could see her trying to gather her strength. That must have been the first decent sleep she'd had in days and he'd cut it short. He placed a hand on her shoulder and she glanced at it but didn't shrug him off.

"I know you're tired but we can't stay." She nodded and took the hand that he offered, allowing him to pull her to her feet. His stomach lurched as she swayed slightly before gathering her things. This was not going to be a good day.

[madhatterbri]

Shakedown | Mafia!HOOK

Summary: The Perry family take you from Tyler with help from the inside.

@99hook @shawtys-things

"Have you heard the news?" Taz asked taking a few puffs from his cigar. He placed the cigar on the ashtray and looked at his son. The smoke caused a haze above their table. He noted his son's silence that he hadn't. "Jack and his family of low life criminals have been spotted around New York,"

Tyler tensed at the news. He had been careless the last few days with taking his girl out. He thought about all the places they visited. All the places Jack and his men could have been hiding. He cursed inwardly at his own foolishness. A glimmer of hope cast over him. Maybe they hadn't been around long.

"How long?"

"The boys are saying three days. Could be more or less. He must have drove from LA this time," Taz answered and leaned back in his chair. He stared at his son noting his worried expression. "Where is your name?"

"At school. Anthony is there like usual," he answered feeling sheepish. HOOK knew he messed up. He didn't need a whole ass lecture about it.

"Make sure you alert Anthony that Jack is back. Maybe have them come here right after class," Taz advised. Right now he needed to make sure Jack wasn't poking around where he shouldn't be.

🖤

You smiled seeing Anthony at the car. He always waited patiently for you no matter how long or short your classes ran. He was scrolling through his phone while he leaned against the car. His normal happy expression shrouded in worry.

"Hey, Anthony. Is everything okay?" You asked.

"Bad news. Boss man is telling me to get you to one of the safe houses. New York got a visitor you don't want to be acquainted with," he broke the news to you. You frowned.

"But St. Marks isn't too far from here. Couldn't we go back home?"

"We don't know if any of his men infiltrated the place yet," he answered while opening the door for you.

"Is Tyler gonna visit us there?" You asked hopefully while throwing your bookbag in the backseat. You slid inside the car.

"That's the plan,"

🖤

Tyler noticed the time and immediately started to worry. He couldn't get a hold of Anthony or his girlfriend. A couple of his men drove around NYU but hadn't seen you. They talked the professor who informed them you left with Anthony hours ago.

"Son, this isn't like Anthony. We may have to accept the fact that-"

"He wouldn't betray me. I told him to come here as soon as he got her. Class ran late or something," he snapped at his father. He rested his head on his hands. His fingers pulled his hair as the stress took over.

"You gotta think with your mind and not your heart. Every second you treating Anthony like he didn't betray you is another second your name could be out there in danger,"

🖤

"We are here," Anthony informed you after the long car ride. You kicked yourself for leaving your phone back home. It was weird. You left in on the nightstand last night and this morning it was gone. Maybe it fell under the bed while you slept.

He stepped out of the car and opened the door for you. You thanked him and walked out seeing the safe house.

The house was made of brick surrounded by tall pine trees. There was no windows and lots of security cameras. Several armored cars were already parked near the house.

"Tyler never mentioned this one to me before," you pointed out. You thought you had visited all the ones his family owned. This one was certainly not as modern as the rest but it seemed cozy.

"Come on. Let's get you inside. It's a little chilly out here," Anthony offered while extending his arm towards the house. You walked towards the door with your stomach tied in knots. Something was off about this situation. None of HOOK's men were outside.

You stopped just before the stairs on to the porch. He stopped right behind you.

"I don't think we are at the right place. I want to go to St. Marks. I-" you stopped once you turned around. Anthony's gun was pointed at you. Your mouth fell open in shock.

"Why?"

"Enough. Get up the stairs and knock on the door. He's been expecting you," he ordered and flicked his gun towards you. You turned around and slowly walked up the stairs. Before you could knock on the door a man answered it.

His brown hair pushed back into a bun. His brown eyes stared down at you. You hadn't seen this man before in your dealings with HOOK.

"You must be your name. I'm Jack and I've been dying to meet you," he greeted.

🖤

"I'm really sorry, Taz. We tried tailing them but he used the traffic to get rid of us. They were going out somewhere Northwest," the driver spoke through the cellphone speaker. HOOK slammed his fist in the table. He breathed heavily and crossed his arms to control himself.

"How did your name look?"

"Like everything was okay. I'm sure Anthony was feeding her some mess. We are gonna keep our eyes open. We got an informant telling us where they went. We will keep you posted," the driver assured and hung up. The twisted pain of betrayal weighed heavily.

"Son, calm down. We are doing everything we can to locate her," Taz promised. Tyler remained motionless until his cell phone rang. He grabbed the phone from his back pocket. The screen lit up the last name he wanted to see.

Anthony

"Where the fuck is she?" Tyler barked into the phone.

🖤

Tyler's voice through the phone sprung tears to your eyes. He sounded so upset and you couldn't be there to help him. You looked at Jack as a tear slid down your cheek.

"Now see you are going to make her cry. Is that what you want?" Jack asked with annoyance over the phone. He stared at you. "Tell him you are fine with his friends Anthony and Jack,"

"I... I'm fine, Ty," you stuttered afraid of what he would do if you hadn't cooperated. For now you were sitting on a couch surrounded by Anthony and several of Jack's men.

"Enough games, Perry. Where is she?" Tyler demanded.

"You weren't any good at hide and seek were you? You know you wasted Anthony as a babysitter for your little girlfriend. He really is a jack of all trades," he complimented the man that betrayed the Senerchia family. "But look it's late. Let me call you in the morning and we can settle this like men then,"

"Tell me where you are now and we can settle it when I get there,"

Jack yawned and rubbed his eyes.

"Patience, young Tyler. Good night,"

🖤

Once Jack ended the call someone called his dad. Tyler hoped it would be information regarding Jack's whereabouts. Sure enough he was in luck. In a matter of minutes he was driving to her location. The GPS said he would be there in a few hours.

"Just hold on, your name," he whispered as the driver sped through New York.

🖤

Jack left you on the couch while he conducted business. Your hands tied in front of your body. He didn't trust you to be alone by the front door. A man stayed with you to watch you. With no windows the thought of escaping seemed small.

Anthony appeared in the room. Ever since he betrayed you he hadn't been able to look at you. The betrayal ate you up and you had one simple question for him.

"Why?" You asked him. Your voice so small and innocent. That was exactly how you felt. None of this revolved around you. You just happened to be dating the son of a very important man. "Why didn't you tell him you didn't want to watch me anymore? Was it something I did?"

He flinched at your words. You weren't going to understand. This was a man's game and you were just a silly little pawn.

"Shut her up," he ordered one of the men in the room.

"Gladly," the man laughed and placed a piece of silver tape over your mouth.

🖤

"He's here," Jack yelled running through the front door. Tires screeched outside signaling HOOK's arrival. Before you could think Jack was dragging you outside. A gun pointed at your back.

The SUVs parked outside in a half circle. Tyler stood in front of them. Their lights showing him brightly.

"No daddy here to protect you? I'm shocked," Jack announced while grabbing your hair and pulling back. You yelped in pain against the tape as he forced you to walk towards Tyler. HOOK's men raised their guns trying to get a clear shot at Jack but he used you as a shield.

"What do you want Jack?" HOOK asked. "Give her to me and it's yours,"

"I want the Senerchia family to be no more. The Perry family will reign Supreme. My dad couldn't do it before he died and now it's my turn," Jack spoke his terms for your safety. You shook your head. You knew how hard his family worked to build their empire.

"Deal. We will pack everything up here and you will have all our point of contacts," Tyler agreed.

"You think I'm stupid? I want you and daddy swimming with the fishes. I want the Senerchia name gone from the mafia history books. When anyone says your name they will think of me and remember my face as the one that brought you down. You and your daddy are noth-," Jack was suddenly silenced once your elbow connected to his stomach. He doubled over in pain allowing you a chance at freedom. You ran towards Tyler. His arms wide open to grab you.

Before they were able to shoot Jack a reinforced car pulled up in front of him. Anthony yelled for him to get in and they drove off in a matter of seconds. Jack escaped but you were safe. That was all HOOK cared about. You buried your face in his chest and cried.

"Let's get you home," he whispered as he untied your hands. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he carried you bridal style to the car.

🖤

"We almost had him!" Jack yelled in the car. "Why did you do that?"

"You think he was going to let you getaway with taking his girl? You were going to be gone and the Perry name left in shambles," Anthony reasoned. "Don't worry. I know all of New York like the back of my hand. You'll get your kingdom and I'll get my revenge,"

Anthony stared off into the distance getting further away from his ex best friend.

[ethersierra]

I haven't listened to the latest episode yet, so I'm trying to avoid spoilers, but have they announced when the last episode is coming yet? I remember hearing something (possibly from you) about it ending on ep 42, but they hadn't said anything in podcast about it that I heard. It being TAZ Steeplechase.

It has been confirmed that this week's episode is the last of Steeplechase. They did in fact make it to 42.

[cataztrophi]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by: @noodyl-blasstal thanks!!

Tagging: @fandomsnstuff @duck-newton I think a lot of people have been tagged already but if you haven't pls consider this an invitation to answer these as well!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2 currently, but I plan on putting up my TAZNC work at which point I will have 15!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

4,680 right now, but that number will increase by a lot shortly since I think all my TAZNC works were between 1,000-4,000 words.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

TAZ, and I've got a few Owl House things in the works I hope to finish some day.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Show Me Yours, then The Thing With Feathers

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love receiving comments and I love being able to talk a bit about what I was thinking when I wrote things.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't usually write a lot of angst, but probably this unnamed ficlet because nothing really gets resolved at the end, although it is a fairly hopeful ending.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

It's hard to pick, I write mostly things that leave a lot of possibilities open, but I'd say probably my 10th entry for TAZNC this year (man I really gotta name these things) because I think the emotional journey makes the ending more satisfying.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope! I've only gotten very kind words and I'm extremely grateful for all of them.

9. Do you write smut?

Yup. Nothing I'm quite finished with yet but I have several in the works and I hope to get some posted soon

10. Do you write crossovers?

They're not really my style, but I think they are fun to think about and play around with!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, and I'm small enough right now that I think it's unlikely.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I've heard of

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I did once on a previous account, unfortunately I was very bad at finishing anything at that point in my life and I hadn't gotten on ADD meds, so we didn't finish it (my fault). I'd like to co-write something at some point, but I think I'd need to have more practice with writing/finishing longer stories before I felt confident about doing it again.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Taakitz babey! Top tier meet-weird plus some truly beautiful moments, and such a great dynamic to play around with

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I'm not sure I'd say "never," but there is one Taakitz fake dating fic that I would need to seriously rework in order to make it coherent. I hope to finish some version of it someday, but it certainly won't look like the current WIP.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Boy I wish I knew! Someone told me I have a "lyrical" writing style, so I'll take it! I do really like working with the flow of words. Also I wrote a lot of tender romantic scenes when I was a touch-starved closeted high schooler, and I was surprised by how easy those scenes feel to write in my current work.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I have a tendency to write too much lead-in and too much ending if I'm not careful, so I basically have to chop off the first and last bits of every fic. I am very bad at coming up with plots. I worry a lot about capturing characters' voices and can struggle with differentiating them. And as previously mentioned, I tend to start a lot of things and not finish them, although I think I'm improving in that regard!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I'm very wary about it for myself. I could just about manage French but for anything else I'd want someone fluent to look it over for me.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Good Omens, back before the TV series came out! It was a pretty small fandom at that point, and I had to get my Aziraphale/Crowley angst out somewhere when I only knew like three people who'd read the book

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I'm really proud of my TAZNC work, but I think I'm still proudest of The Thing With Feathers because I feel like I did exactly what I wanted with it and captured everything I was hoping to.

[callidusdryadalis]

@spacereflected asked: Taz Is lifting Sorros up. Yup. Lifting him up and carrying him over to the pile of books he's just fetched from the markets.

He'd been so focused on attempting to alter the colour of the campfire than Sorros hadn't heard anyone approaching. He'd read, recently, in a rather old tome that creating a blue flame was possible and though he had followed the instructions to the letter, he had not yet managed to create such results.

Concentrating so much to almost make himself a headache, it was almost a blessing that he was scooped up off of the ground, carried unexpectedly, and then placed back down. Relocated, a pale brow raised and a silent question poised; why move him-? Why relocate his person?

His questions, too, were answered wordlessly; eyes soon settling 'pon the pile of books resting upon pillows and aside blankets just behind his love. Gradually, a smile pulled onto Sorros' expression - it mattered not what was within them, there was absolute certainty that the elf would read them cover to cover repeatedly, treasure them immensely simply because they had been a gift.

"You know, one day I may just have to purchase a house with a large library simply to store all of the wonderful gifts you always seem to shower me with."

[ficklepenguin]

all the cdramas sound really interesting, I've heard of the untamed and you've told me about it before, i can check it out on netflix since that's the easiest one for me to watch!! i can't promise i'll watch it quickly, i watch things while i crochet so subtitled things can be difficult but i'm getting better at crocheting while not looking so it'll be good practice!!!

okay okay okay i'm gonna put my rambles under a cut it got kind of long and.... rambly 😂

it's really hard for me to sum up taz in a way that doesn't spoil the whole thing but it's just like, it starts off a silly goofy one off that the mcelroy brothers did with their dad but they enjoyed it so they kept going, and it wasn't supposed to be a big thing so they don't take anything seriously and there's a lot of dick jokes and general goofing around at first but then something devastating happens and the tone starts to shift, you can actually feel the way they start to care more and more about these characters and this world. it stays silly, don't get me wrong, someone does a dance to the thong song to cheer someone up in like the fourth episode from the end and that silly moment is followed up immediately by one of the most depressing so it's like emotional whiplash.

BUT it's about three guys, taako, merle, and magnus, collecting these dangerous artifacts that the world has forgotten about but is slowly rediscovering, and it's full of hilarity and excitement and twists and LOVE and MORE LOVE, and i cannot begin to explain how much love is contained in this podcast. it makes me cry with joy sometimes and it makes me cry with sadness and it makes me cry with laughter. and honestly, one of the coolest things is kind of hard to describe to someone without listening but I'll try

so the dm, griffin, started this campaign from one of the official campaign books, specifically the one that comes with the d&d starter set. he takes things from that at first, but then he starts getting his own ideas and planting seeds and over the next couple of arcs, he starts to come up with the overarching story. but even though he didn't have the full story from episode one, you can still go back and see accidental foreshadowing for ideas that hadn't formed yet and it's GREAT.

there are graphic novels for the first five arcs of the podcast, they're still coming out, there's gonna be another 3 or so (depending on how they decide to break up the last few arcs) so if you wanted to start there, those are available, they cut out some things because they couldn't include everything, but they also fixed some of the early weirdness that caused contradictions in the podcast (due to the fact that the dm didn't have the overarching plot yet and two of the PCs had no real back stories). like one of my favorite things about the graphic novels is that they were absolutely made and edited by big fans of the podcast, because they know what the fans of the podcast will look for and they make sure to include those things (though they did cut out one of my absolute favorite bits from one arc, it wasn't plot relevant though it was just so hilarious)

quick summary of the main boys (aka Tres Horny Boys)

Taako is an elf wizard who is a chef. he is so mean and vain but he cares so deeply and he is soooo bad at expressing it. he has Serious Issues and i love that for him.

Magnus is a human fighter who is reckless to a fault, he has a compulsive need to save everyone. he's like a giant puppy who cares very deeply and will crush all your bones trying to hug you

Merle is a dwarf cleric who has a very blase attitude about his god Pan which is hilarious. he's very irreverent but Pan seems into it which is good for Merle. he also is waaaaaay too into plants if you know what i mean

then there's a whole huge cast of NPCs and i adore almost all of them. my favorite character is actually a spoiler if i explain them which SUCKS because that means i never get to talk about them and they aren't even in the comics yet..... so my favorite character is Taako.

this isn't really cohesive or coherent i think but it's just really hard for me to describe. it's honestly just a story about how love can save the universe and it's got everything, it's got laughs, it'll make you cry, it's got liches, it's got love and betrayal and forgiveness and tragedy and joy and found family and the grim reaper is a hot boy who is a huge romantic nerd. i really think you'd like it and would loooove to talk about it with you.

biiiish i miss u let's do fandom again together someday okay 🩷

I MISS YOU TOOOOO LET’S DO FANDOM AGAIN SOMETIME!!

I got deep in the cdrama hole recently (I’ve not seen loads, but the ones I have seen I am OBSESSED with) what about you??

[herbgerblin]

I always recognize your art because you uploaded your Soldier, Poet, King animatic like two days after I finished listening to Balance... I hadn't seen that much fanart yet so I didn't have much of a sense of fanon appearances, but I recognized all your characters immediately because they are so wonderfully designed! Anyway, I sobbed like the first four times I watched it, so I associate your art with the incredible emotional power of Balance. You rock!

Thank You! I’m glad you happened to find it after having finished TAZ because it’s the finale and. Like it’s straight up the last scene.

Reading the comments on the animatic is always a trip and a half because it’s 90% people who’ve heard the podcast and can recognize everyone instantly. And 10% are people who have never experienced taz and have no idea what’s going on but they think my art is pretty :0

I’m the kind of person who likes to avoid spoilers until I’m caught up on a thing, so when I see those I’m like, y i k e s.

But then it’s nice because they go and listen to taz and come back with context and are like !!oh!!! :0 that’s always nice to look forward to :>