#and god i don’t get paid nearly enough for what i’m doing at work

[soldierboys]

i’m so fucking tired like. mentally

[frudoo]

Slasher 141 again, sorry to bug, I'm chomping at the bit. She meets the others? I humbly ask for more pleaseeee

Can y'all tell I'm horny for slasher Johnny

Warnings: Smut throughout, so MDNI. Fingering, strange men, reader is just getting a taste of what she signed up for. Fem!Reader obvs.

     Simon doesn’t talk much. Maybe it’s because Johnny’s got his hand down your pants and he doesn’t want to interrupt, but even so, he just gives off that kind of vibe. Johnny’s trailing kisses down your neck and you’re whimpering, just trying to get the two of them to make small talk.

“S-Simon, are you… do you also- um… you know. Kill people?” You wince at your poor choice of words, but the kisses from your date don’t let up, so maybe you’re alright.

     Simon’s beady eyes meet yours through the rear-view mirror. Fuck, if he’s not a serial killer, he should be. Those dark brown eyes are deeply unsettling, making you nauseous. He nods in affirmation before turning his eyes back to the road.

"We all are."

Well, shit. Is there such a thing as a murderer-radar? Because if so, yours is in mint condition. 

     Johnny bites down on your neck harshly at the same time his middle finger slips inside of your pussy, and you squeal. Is this what they do? Seduce a vulnerable woman with deadly curiosity such as yourself, just to take her away and dice her up? God, you really should have paid more attention to the warnings in all those true crime documentaries. Now you’re going to end up in one. 

     “Are… are you going to kill me?” You sigh—rule number one: don’t question what the big serial killers are going to do to you while you’re in their truck.

     Johnny grins against your neck, his hot tongue soothing the bite he’d just left on you. He inserts another finger, and, well… maybe getting the best finger-fuck of your life before you die isn’t the worst way to go out. You mewl when he curls them right up against your g-spot and almost miss Simon’s low voice answering your question.

     “If we wanted y’dead, y’already would be,” he shrugs, pulling onto a long dirt road that leads to a large farmhouse, past herds of cattle and fat pigs who look like they’ve never missed a meal. 

     Simon’s answer does nothing to settle your nerves, although the orgasm that Johnny coaxes out of you works well to distract. There’s a black cat waiting by the front door when they guide you inside, and your head starts pounding. If that’s not an omen, you don’t know what is. Damn Johnny and his beautiful, charming self, and damn you for not being bothered enough by his career choice when you should have been. Now you’re not even sure what you’ve gotten yourself into.

     It’s warm inside. Inviting, despite everything, with cozy furniture littered across the den and taxidermied animals decorating the walls. Extravagant chandeliers hang from the ceiling, lighting up the area with a dim yellow aura that helps remind you to breathe. The walls are painted a dark green and the fireplace is going, and on the largest couch sits two more men—one with blue eyes nearly as piercing as Johnny’s, and another with the prettiest lips you’ve ever seen.

     Now that you can see him better, you realize that even Simon is ridiculously handsome, with short blonde hair and a scar across his lip that must have been the result of repairing a nasty split. More white marks are littered across his face, but the honey of his brown eyes don’t seem nearly as cold under this warm light. It almost makes you forget what they do for a living.

     “I’m guessin’ this is her, since she’s not hog-tied,” the one with blue eyes speaks gruffly, standing from his seated position and slowly stalking closer.

     He’s taller than Johnny, but not quite at Simon’s height, and his hand is rough against your skin as he cups your cheek in his palm. His thumb runs along your bottom lip, eyes taking in every inch of your person. The man hums thoughtfully before removing his hands from you, looking between the men who stand by your side.

     “Pretty thing, ain’t she? Nice and soft, too,” he concludes, calling the other man over to check you out as well.

     Your breath hitches in your throat as the new man smiles down at you, those luscious lips spread across a perfectly straight set of white teeth. He doesn’t touch you, just gives you a once-over before nodding.

     “She’s perfect,” he confirms to the previous man before looking to you again. “M’Kyle. Tha’s John, and m’sure y’know those two already.”

     You nod, chewing on your bottom lip. You still have no idea what the hell is going on, or what they mean by perfect. Perfect for what, exactly? More taxidermy? Pig food?

     “Glad ye approve, Cap’n, Gaz,” Johnny beams, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Knew ye’d love her.”

     Your eyes widen slightly when Simon leans down to press a lingering kiss to your lips, followed by Kyle, then John. You’re frozen in place, but Johnny just chuckles and scoops you up into his arms, strong legs striding down the hallway into one of the bedrooms.

     “Dinnae be afraid, hen. They like ye. Ah told ye, ye’ll ge’ along jus’ fine,” he presses his lips against your temple, then lays you on his bed. 

     “We’ll ge’ yer room set up in the mornin’, but ah need tae taste tha’ sweet cunt reit fookin’ now. Dinnae be quiet, lass, let ‘em hear yer bonnie moans."

[usomads]

All-Inclusive // Jimmy Uso x Reader

Author’s Note -> Ahhhh I love this one 🤭 Been working on this for a bit so I hope y’all like it! Also: I’m thinking about making a tag list for my stories… is that something y’all would be interested in? Lmk and as always, happy reading! 

Plot -> You knew being at an all-inclusive suite included everything like drinks, food, etc., but you didn’t know you’d find yourself getting even more.

Pairings -> Jimmy Uso x Fem!Reader (Y/N)

Warnings -> Cursing, Fingering, Oral Sex (M!Receiving, F!Receiving), Choking, P in V, Creampie, Not Proofread, MDNI

Word Count -> 2.8k

“A closet full of clothes, and yet I never know what to wear to these things,” you muttered to yourself, sifting through hangers trying to find something you could work with. Articles of clothing scattered the floor around you as you stood frustrated, trying to throw something halfway decent together. It was always like this for these events, you always knew exactly how to do your hair and makeup but for some reason the outfit was something you could never figure out. You and your boyfriend, Jonathan, were going to a WWE Premium Live Event, and since he wasn’t booked for this card you decided to get a suite with some other wrestlers and their spouses to watch it. Well, maybe, if you could find something to wear.

“Baby!” Jon calls from downstairs, “we gotta go! We’re gonna be late, you almost ready?” He makes his way to you in the closet, noticing you were still trying to get yourself together.

“Go ahead, I’ll head there in a bit. Still tryna find an outfit,” you sighed, clearly annoyed at yourself. Jon wraps his arms around your waist from behind and plants a kiss to your cheek. “Alright, baby girl, just don’t take too long, okay? I know Bianca and Jade are dying to see you, it’s been a minute since y’all been together.”

“I know, I know, I’ll be right behind you, I promise,” you smiled at him as he gave you another kiss and left for the arena, while you went back to sorting through your closet. After about 10 minutes of staring at the same clothes on hangers you were close to texting Jon to let him know it wasn’t happening tonight, when something caught your eye. A black silk button up was nearly hidden behind all the other clothes hanging up, but you saw it. And it would go perfect with this new skirt I bought too. Grabbing it from the rack, you were able to get a closer look. It was for sure oversized, and you were trying to remember where you could’ve gotten it from. It didn’t matter anyways, because you were already throwing it on along with the new skirt and a simple pair of black heels. You made your way to the full-length mirror in your closet, adjusting the buttons on the top to tease your cleavage modestly, but enough to make them noticeable. Giving yourself one last up-down in the mirror, you were satisfied. More than satisfied, actually, you looked stunning. You shook your head and laughed, the annoyance and stress of the past hour and a half feeling silly now that you had finally found something to wear and it paid off. You grab your phone off the dresser and call a driver to come get you, grabbing a small bag to take with you as you head downstairs and out the door.

“Y/N, oh my god, girl! You finally made it!” Bianca yelled excitedly as her and Jade ran to the door of the suite to greet you. “It’s been so long since we’ve seen you,” Bianca gave you a strong hug and rocked the two of you back and forth, “how have you been?!”

“It’s been too damn long!” Jade exclaimed, “and can I just say… you look hot. Jon said you were having wardrobe issues and, honey, looking at you I just don’t think that’s true,” the three of you laughed.

“No, seriously, I was! I damn near canceled because I couldn’t find anything, but finding this top hidden in the back of the closet saved it. I don’t even remember where I got it honestly, I don’t normally buy stuff this oversized but, hey, I guess my forgetfulness finally came in clutch,” you chuckled. 

“And did, you look incredible, babe. Now c’mon, let’s go mingle with everybody!” Bianca and Jade locked your guys’s arms as the three of you hopped around from group to group in the suite, chatting with some new faces and some you hadn’t seen in a very long time. Your eyes tried searching for your boyfriend, but you couldn’t seem to find him anywhere so you assumed he had gone to the restroom or maybe was notified he had to do something for the show last minute and shrugged it off. After a while though, you had to pee so you excused yourself from the group and walked across the hall to the restrooms. You did your business and washed your hands, drying them and making your way back to the suite. You opened the bathroom door to be greeted by your boyfriend.

“Oh, hey, babe! I was just looking for you, where have you be-,” you were cut off by Jon stepping into the restroom with you, pinning you against the wall and locking the door behind him. You gasped as your back collided with the hard surface behind you as Jon stared down at you with an intensity you had never seen before. His eyes trailed down your body to take in what you were wearing, coming back up and staring directly at the shirt you were wearing. 

“I see you found my shirt,” he growled, and your memory clicked in from a week prior. ***FLASHBACK***

“Babe! Have you seen my button up? The silk one my mom got me a while back?” Jonathan shouted from the bedroom as you were applying your lipstick, getting ready for date night. “Um, no I don’t think so… did you check the laundry?” 

“Yeah, it’s not in there, can’t find it. I’ll just wear something else, don’t worry about it!”

***END FLASHBACK***

“I- I thought it was mine, I found it in the back of my closet. I’m sorry…” you muttered, nervously, not wanting him to be mad at you for “stealing” his shirt. “Oh, baby, I’m not mad,” Jon paused, lowering his head closer to your trembling lips, “but if you’re really sorry…” he inches closer, his breath fanning over your cheeks as his lips brush yours, “then show me.”

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in, closing the distance between you. He kissed you with a desire you had never seen from him before, hungrily brushing his tongue against yours as he asserted his dominance over you. His fingers worked on the buttons of your (his) shirt, but left the clothing sitting on your shoulders as the cool air conditioning hit your nipples, hardening them instantly. You shuddered at the feeling, as his hands hiked your shirt up and kneaded your ass as he planted kisses along the base of your neck. “You know… I love it… when you wear my shirts… so fuckin’ sexy.” You moaned as his lips drifted down your neck and to your chest, as his hands fondled your waist and inched closer to your growing wetness. The tips of his fingers teased the front of your panties, toying with the material as you bucked your hips desperately for any sort of friction. “Patience, baby, imma give it to you,” you weren’t listening, too consumed in your neediness for him, and continued to squirm underneath him. You’re snapped out of your trance by Jon pinning your arms above your head and growling in your ear. “What I say, huh? Keep still ‘fore I give you somethin’ to squirm about, and you ain’t gonna like it.” You whimper and nod in response, trying to hold it together as you fight every urge to act on your own desperation. Jon holds your wrists above your head with his left hand, using the right to slide your panties to the side and dive his fingers into your wetness. You trembled, sighing and throwing your head back to hit the wall as his digits caressed your dripping folds. He was torturing you, edging his fingers closer and closer to your entrance but never slipping inside, instead opting to watch your face twist and contort at the way a simple touch from him had you so riled up. He loved the way your breathing would stagger as he teased you and watched as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, giving into his touch. 

“Mmm, baby please,” you cried, the sounds of your whines echoing around you. “You sorry, hmm?” He teased, brushing his thumb across your clit, causing you to jolt in pleasure. “Y-yes, fuckk baby, I’m so- I’m sorry,” you hissed.

“You gonna have to be more convincing than that” You whined loudly at his response, turning into a loud and dragged out moan as he slipped a finger inside. Your pussy immediately tightened around it, squeezing it as he pumped in and out of you. Your eyes rolled into your skull as he carefully worked his magic on you. Your fingers gripped onto the blazer he was wearing, trying to cling onto anything as he drove you further into pure, unadulterated bliss. His finger picked up pace and glided deeper and deeper inside you, brushing against the soft padding of your g-spot as he curled it. You felt yourself stretch around him again with the addition of a second finger, your walls spasming around both digits as he mercilessly thrusted his fingers inside of you. 

“O-oh my god, Jon I-, I’m so c-close,” you moaned as his lips found their way back to your neck again. “Hold it. You’re not cumming ‘til I say you can, got me? Now tell me how sorry you are.”

“I- I’m sorry, baby, I’m so so sorry. Now please, I’m gonna-”

“Uh uh, not sorry enough. Get on your knees and convince me.” He withdrew his fingers from you faster than you anticipated, nearly making your knees give out in the process, but you obeyed him like the good girl you were. You dropped to your knees in an instant, hands immediately grabbing for his belt and zipper, as you worked quickly to free him from the constraints of his pants. You could tell from the prominent bulge that lined his boxers he was painfully hard as you palmed him, Jon letting out a low groan and instinctively grinding himself into your hand. “Fuck baby, don’t tease. You know ion like that shit.” You pulled down his boxers to reveal his cock and salivated at the sight; the veins along his shaft prominent as his length twitched upon release from its imprisonment. You looked up at the man who stood before you, his eyes darkened and glazed over with lust as he watched you coat his dick in your saliva before taking his tip in your mouth. You sucked lightly and gave kitten licks to him, knowing how sensitive his head was and watching as he threw his head back in ecstasy and released your name from his lips in low moans. Your mouth worked its way down his shaft, hollowing your cheeks as you took him inch by inch, his hands grasping your hair as you took as much of him as you could.

“Mmm, fuck ma, lemme fuck that pretty lil mouth of yours. Always so good for me.” You gave a slight nod, relaxing your jaw and opening your mouth more as his hips made slow and steady movements. You gagged on him, but focused on the breathing from your nose as he drilled himself into your throat. Tears brimmed your eyes, threatening to spill onto your cheeks as he continued to thrust faster and faster, making you gag on him more and more. “You love it when I use your pretty little mouth like this, hmm? How sorry are you now?” You moaned around him as he showed no mercy on your throat and gripped your hair, and watching his face told you he was reaching the edge. Surprisingly, he released himself from your mouth with a pop and helped you up, still dizzy from the assault his cock was performing on your mouth. 

“I still don’t think you’re that sorry, you wanna prove it to me? Hop up on this counter and spread your legs for me, pretty girl, imma fuck you ‘til I believe it.” You hopped on the counter of the bathroom sink and opened yourself to him completely, letting him see your glistening folds aching and ready for him. He pumped himself a few times before lining himself up and slamming into you, giving you no room to adjust to him as he ruthlessly pounded into you and had you screaming his name. His hand quickly met your mouth, covering it to keep you quiet as he leaned in and started fucking deeper into you. You were seeing stars, moaning into his hand and raking your nails across his shoulders as he drove into you at an unforgiving pace. 

“Shit, Y/N, so fuckin’ tight f’me. Fit me like a fuckin’ glove. Can’t get enough of this pussy, baby,” he moaned, continuing his fast-paced thrusts. “You wanna tell me how sorry you are now, baby girl? You think you’re sorry enough for me to let you cum?” He removed the hand covering your mouth and brought it down to your clit, rubbing slow circles into the sensitive bud.

“H-holy s-shit, mmm, fuck baby I- I’m s-sorry! I’m sorry I-, oh my god, I’m so fuckin’ sorry, baby,” you cried, “p-please believe me, I’m so sorry. I’m gonna-” “You think you deserve it, hmm?” He wraps his hand around your throat, gently squeezing as you let out a strangled moan. “Go ahead baby, you think you deserve this nut?”

“Y-yes, ohh fuck, yes I deserve it. B-been so good f-f’you.” You choked out, consumed completely in Jon and the pleasure he was providing you.

“You’ve been such a good girl… you really are sorry, huh?” You nodded frantically, letting soft moans fall off your lips. “Let go, baby, cum all over this dick f’me. Lemme see you.”

The orgasm that erupts from the pit of your stomach is explosive enough to make supernovas look small in comparison. Your body and pussy convulse around him as you scream his name and release yourself on his cock. Your vision goes black as you’re overwhelmed with an intense feeling of pleasure as your juices coat his dick and lower abdomen, squirting all over him. He watches you as you let go, taking in every detail of your mouth agape and chanting his name, the furrow of your brows, your eyes squeezing shut, and most of all your walls constricting around his cock, coaxing him to his own release. He coats your insides with a loud groan, releasing himself completely into your aching pussy as he slowly pistons himself into you to ride out both of you two’s orgasms. Soft moans and pants escape the both of you, coming down from what felt like the most intense release the two of you have shared. You both sat for a moment, evening your breathing and taking the time to fully recover before he pulled out of you and moved your panties back to their rightful position, his cum leaking out of you and soaking them in the process. He placed a gentle kiss on your forehead and you smiled up at him, softly kissing his lips before jumping down and adjusting yourself in the mirror.

You both desperately tried to cover up the events of what just happened, feeling satisfied and unlocking the door to the restroom before attempting to sneak out, but Bianca being in front of the door stopped you both in your tracks.

“Oh, thank god, I’ve had to pee for the past 30 minutes,” she teased, wiggling her eyebrows at the both of you, “didn’t know Y/N needed help using the bathroom, Jon.” The two of you blushed, knowing your attempt to hide your escapade had failed miserably. “Now get y’all horny asses inside, you’re lucky they didn’t start filming the live segment in the suite yet, or the TV audience would’ve heard quite the show… now, if you’ll excuse me,” she winked, hurrying past you both as you and your boyfriend exchanged a quick glance before sneaking your way back in the suite.

[moonstruckme]

Hi my love!! I just reread your bodyguard tasm!peter parker blurb and it was so cute 😭I loved the original premise where peters spider senses got distracted because of her!! You wrote it so beautifully.

I'd love to request a part two (If you're open to that?) where he's guarding her again and we see their relationship develop a little more??

i read your requests rules and couldn't find anything about you not writing part twos, but feel free to ignore if you'd rather not! lots of love <3 <3

Hi sweetheart, thank you thank you!!

bodyguard!(tasm)Peter Parker x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

Peter’s staying on the ground for your sake, but he doesn’t love it. 

You’re relaxed as can be, lounging on your bed while he paces your unfairly giant room from end to end. This, he thinks, is why people hate politicians. You’ve got an ensuite bathroom the size of his apartment, and on the taxpayer’s dime. He gets it now. If you and your dad were living in a shoebox like every other self-respecting New Yorker, maybe the guy wouldn’t get so many death threats. 

“You don’t have to be all vigilant,” you say. “My dad’s not here. So long as I don’t get actually kidnapped or killed while you’re here, sitting down isn’t going to affect your performance evaluation.” 

Peter looks at you. “I’m getting a performance evaluation?” 

Your smile is lopsided and goofy. It’s humiliating how much it affects him. “No. Who would he send it to? Your employer?” 

“Oh.” He feels stupid. “Good point.” 

“Come here,” you laugh. “I got us coffee.” 

He goes to sit on your bed, mostly because he’ll do anything you ask him to. After spending a few hours hugging you on a roof, Peter’s found that he actually likes you. You’re not snooty or spoiled like he might have expected, friendly to him even though he’s technically working for you. You seem oddly down-to-earth for someone with your upbringing, funny and smart. (Smarter than him, maybe. You turn him into a blundering idiot every time he sees you, though, so it’s hard to say.) You’re surprisingly fun to be around. 

You lean over, grabbing two disposable coffee cups from your nightstand. “Do you want peppermint or caramel?” 

“Which one do you want?” 

“No way. You’re my guest, you get first pick.” 

Peter’s here on a job, but he likes your version of the story better. That you’d think of him as your guest, someone invited in whom you want to please, makes an affectionate warmth unfurl in his gut. 

“You should probably have the one you want, because the other one’s going to get cold,” he says, an apology in his tone. Your brows wrinkle. “I can’t really drink through the mask…” 

“Oh.” You close your eyes, expression clearing. “God, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even think about that.” 

“Don’t worry about it.” Peter’s smiling under the mask. He wonders if you can hear it in his voice. “Enjoy yours. I’ll live vicariously.” 

“You couldn’t just lift it up enough to drink?” 

“Uh, no. The whole secret identity thing is…kind of important to the job.” 

You smile guiltily, lifting one of the cups to your lips. “Fair enough.” 

You’re silent for a minute, watching him as you sip at your coffee. Once again, making it nearly impossible for Peter to do what he’s being paid to do. He should be keeping his senses alert, watching the windows, surveilling the perimeter or whatever. Not looking into your clever, narrowed eyes and thinking about how your whole room smells like you. 

“Okay,” you say, still scrutinizing him like you’re trying to count the threads in his suit, “now I’m dying to know what’s under the mask.” 

Peter sits very still. He’s had people—fans and foes alike—try to tear it off him before, but he doesn’t think you’re like that. 

“I mean, obviously you’re tall,” you lean back on the bed, mouth pursed in contemplation, “so you’re not, like, twelve. You sound about my age…” 

“I what?” 

“Your voice.” 

“What—” He clears his throat. Tries to sound more generationally ambiguous. “What would make you think that?” 

You crack another one of those sweet, silly smiles. “Well, you’re not going to fool me now,” you say. “I’ve heard you talk. You can’t be more than thirty. Plus, when you got here, you said ‘yo’.” 

Peter really needs to stop saying that. He doesn’t even know when he started. 

“You’ve got stitches all over your suit…” you go on. “What neighborhood are you from again?” 

“I’m not telling you that,” he laughs. 

“Oh, come on.” You scooch a little on the bed, tucking one leg under you to face him more fully. Your eyes pierce his like knives. Very pretty knives. “There’s almost ten million people in New York. You really think I’m going to track you down?” 

“Your dad is the mayor…” 

“Stop.” You give his shoulder a playful shove. Peter’s mask feels suddenly warm. “Those surveillance rumors weren’t true, the tabloids made that up to mess with his re-election campaign.”

“Okay, okay. I’m from Queens.” 

You lean back on your hands, and he can’t decide if the way you’re looking at him is analyzing or flirting. “Interesting,” you say slowly. “So you’re, like, a real man of the people. Not the Bruce Wayne type.” 

“Hey,” he teases, “Bruce Wayne could’ve lived in Queens. It’s nice.” 

“But Bruce Wayne wouldn’t have to sew his own suits,” you point out. 

Peter tilts his head, blows a breath out the side of his mouth. You’ve got him there. 

“And you’re tall, clearly pretty strong, you seem smart…” You nod, seeming to have come to a decision. “I think you’re handsome under there.” 

A laugh startles out of him. He hopes it sounds casual, like it came from someone cool, whose heart isn’t galloping in his chest. Peter really shouldn’t care if you think he has the potential to be handsome under his mask. It’s not like you’ll ever find out. Still, it feels weirdly nice. 

He makes his voice light and playful. “Well, it’s good to have your approval. Now we can pretend that I’m almost in your league.” 

For the first time since he’s gotten here, you look genuinely caught offguard. “Me?” 

“Yeah, you.” Peter grins. It feels good to have flustered you. He’s missed doing that. “Who else?” 

You look away from him as you laugh, shaking your head. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” you say, “but you’re a superhero. You’re not the one who should be worried about leagues.” 

You’re cute. Peter makes a bold move, scooting an inch closer to you, into your space. He’s glad you can’t see that under the mask, his face is just as flushed as yours. “I’m not a superhero,” he says, keeping his voice light as meringue. “I’m just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman.” 

You roll your eyes. “Humble, too. Points in your favor.” 

A laugh rumbles through his chest. Someday, he’s gonna have to get Peter Parker in your orbit somehow. He wants to meet you—more than that, he wants you to meet him. He’s not sure how long he can wait. 

He decides to let you off the hook. Slightly. He reaches across you, taking the unused cup from your nightstand. “Thanks for this,” he says. “Once you don’t need me here anymore, I’m gonna take it home and heat it back up.” He grins even though you can’t see it. “Maybe I’ll swing by and return the favor sometime.”

[cookie-crumblr]

Hype Train!

F! Streamer Reader x M!Yandere Streamer OC

Part 3~

His Info: 📹✨

Part: 1 2 3 4

!!!MINORS DNI!!!

CW: Use of the name jasper🫡✨ (u no who u are soldier💀) !F reader, use of she/her when referring to reader, reader has a vagina, trauma related hallucinations, GORE, violence, murder, torture, kidnapping, blood, sadism, M! masturbation, pet names(good girl), not TOO smutty yet sorry i hope it’ll be worth it 🙈✨

You aren’t sure when you fell asleep… It’s nighttime, “Fuck!” You reach for your phone.

It reads 9:24pm.

You have to work in the morning, but you’ve slept all day, how are you going to get proper sleep now?

You look over at your microwave, the time is blinking 12:00.

“Hm… Power must’ve went out,” You speak out to yourself.

Hearing your own voice is always better than hearing none.

A loud *BANG!* on your door startles you, you lurch forward.

Is it them? “Oh god, no, No NO! I can’t go back!! I PAID YOU!! Please!!”

the banging continues, as you claw at your own head.

and then,

It stops.

Just as abruptly as it started.

You get up to take one of your emergency meds.

They’re so expensive…

You don’t take them as much as you should.

You sigh, and gulp it down.

You turn your computer on, and get ready to stream.

“AHH HAHA HAH,” Pleasured laughing all day long has rendered his vocal cords sore and hoarse.

Jasper gazes fondly over his work so far.

The man you’ve been meeting every month, sitting bound to a chair.

His screams have reduced into nothing but strained guttural noises.

He can’t handle much more.

Jasper did too much, too quickly.

He’s usually more methodical, but the way you make his heart burn, has him losing every strand of sanity in his body.

Squares of this brutes flesh have been removed, the facia torn to shreds.

His teeth have been ripped out.

Fingers snipped off joint by joint.

That wasn’t good enough, Jasper had seen the way he groped you.

The hands up to his wrists sawn off next.

He wrapped him up to stop the bleeding.

He shot him up with adrenaline.

But this—This pathetic thing, isn’t lasting nearly long enough.

Even for how long it’s been going on.

Jasper wanted to savor his pain longer.

So much longer.

He launches the knife like a dart, aimed straight at his head with a furious grunt. It flies through the air and enters dead on the bullseye.

“FUCK YOU! FUCK. YOU. FUCK YOU!FUCK YOU!FUCK YOU!” He pants.

The black handle sticks out of the man’s eye socket.

He lolls his drenched head back and forth, coughing up what’s left of his own blood.

How he isn’t dead is a wonder.

“Awww, doesn’t it suck SO much not being DEAD yet?”

He walks over to him, resting an arm on the wall behind the restrained man. He leans his face down to just above his level.

“Wish I could’ve taught ya a real lesson, you disgusting thing. Sadly I think your time is jus’ about-”

*PING* his blown out pupils slowly follow the air to his pocket where he slides out a phone.

You’re live-streaming!

His hand grasps the handle.

He gurgles out one last labored plea.

“I have to go now~” He shoves the blade back in one swift motion all the way through the man’s socket, and the tip breaks through the back of his skull hitting the grey cement wall behind him.

“and so~” He flips the blade, before another vicious jab into the same socket making the hole an “X”.

“do.” *Crack*! one more

“YOU.” Blood spurts onto him one last time, he doesn’t flinch.

Jasper’s face is now completely coated sticky, drying crimson.

“Mmm” he sighs contently. “I guess I’m done here.” A final pleasured chuckle leaves his chest.

He wipes his face with the back of his hand before whipping it toward the ground, flinging more spatters of blood around him.

He pulls up your stream up on one of the laptops, and puts a phone to his ear. The man’s blood is leaving little pools on everything Jasper touches.

He can’t care less.

He’s too engrossed, too mesmerized by your precious voice.

He quickly informs the cleaning crew on the phone of his location, and that he has spilled cake all over the floor… And walls…And ceiling… Everything really.

“Yes sir! we will send the heavy duty crew asap”

Without knowing it, you soothe him, his eyes flutter shut.

A hand slowly trails to groin as he deeply listens.

He types with the other; “Hey! how are you, Y/username?”

“Hai Jasper!!! I’m so happy to see you again!!”

“mmf” he grunts as his thumb presses down on his clothed lap. “Yess” he whines, “Say my name again”

“I’m good by the way! thanks for askin! How are you!”

He finds the button and unzips his pants with his eyes still closed picturing your actual face and replaying you saying his name again, and again, and again in his head.

He can’t even hear anything you’re saying, to anyone else.

“Good! Wanna hang later?” he types deftly, hoping you’ll call out his name again.

“Omg! Yes please, Jasper!” It’s so innocent, yet he’s still fading fast into a lusty haze.

“Haah! yeeeessss,” His palm wraps his length and squeezes. His thumb teases the tip, pressing down and then massages his glands. “Beg me! Yell my name!”

The blood is acting as lube as he continues to work himself, while one hand desperately clings to the table.

He’s losing his mind just imagining the possibilities; how wet he can get you, how well you’ll take his girth. You’ll be such a good girl, won’t you?

His imagination runs wild: “Harder, Jas-Jasper! M-more!” He can picture you begging, “P-please, please! Fill me, Jasper! Fill me!”. He wants you begging.

“YN!” A low grunt leaves his mouth as he climaxes, mixing white with the red splatters across the keys.

He’s not satisfied though.

You’re not in his lap.

The pain doesn’t subside, and the swell refuses to go down.

He covers his face with his hand.

“I can’t wait to have you…”

[shelby-fangirl00]

Lie To Me-part two-(Irene (OC) x John Shelby x Tommy Shelby)

Summary: Irene has been seeing John Shelby for a year now on and off. In John's absence, Irene begins to feel a pull towards Tommy.

Warnings: (MINORS DNI, 18+) smuuuut, swearing, drinking, MMF (slightly))

The next few days, all I could think about was my night spent with Tommy. It was refreshing to not be constantly thinking about what John was up to. I was getting ready to close up shop at work with one of the tailors I worked alongside with. It wasn’t hard to find work near Small Heath a year ago, with my background in dressmaking. This small fitting shop on the outskirts of Small Heath was owned by an older man, Rory. He was the closest tailer to town. I offered him my services a year ago and we have been working together to help both men and women now. I love the work I do, even though it was a bit of a walk to get there every day. 

I was sitting in the back work station alone, putting some finishing touches on an evening gown I had been working on for months now. It was a long and fitted forest green with golden lining. I held the dress up, marveling at the work I had done. Pulling my bottom lip in, I worried it wasn’t fancy enough for the socialite woman I was making it for. I decided to find Rory to ask him. 

‘Roryyyyyy….’ I sang casually as I made my way to the front of the building, dress in hands. I waltzed into the main area, to find a much younger and dashing man instead. I gasped a bit in surprise, not expecting to see Tommy standing alone, hands placed casually in the pockets of his perfectly tailored gray suit. Rory must’ve left for the day it was getting dark soon. 

‘Evening Thomas...’ I managed to squeak out as he smiled lightly a me. 

‘What’s that you have?’ he asked gesturing to the long gown. I looked down and back at him. ‘Oh…a dress I’ve been working on forever. Supposed to be picked up in the morning…’ My voice trailed off as my eyes fell back down on the dress. I studied it a few seconds longer before looking back at him. 

‘Want a second opinion?’ He asked, seemingly sensing that I was unsure of my work. I smiled walking closer to him. I laid the dress down on a longer table for him to examine. I watched as his eyes scrunched up and studied the dress. He let his fingers brush over the shimmery green fabric, looking back up at me with those sparkling eyes. 

‘I hope whoever is wearing it paid you well enough. It’s very beautiful, Irene. Then again, I’m no dressmaker so my opinion might not mean much to you.’ 

My face bloomed with color at his approval and a wide smile crept up my face. 

‘No, no it means a lot coming from you! Thank god, I’ve been in my head about it all,’ I giggled, grabbing the dress and placing it behind the front counter.

‘What’re you doing here anyways? I know you don’t come here for your fancy suites.’ I questioned, grabbing my jacket from behind the front door. 

‘No, I don’t. I was coming to see you, actually.’ My heart was fluttering at this point. His eyes never wavered from mine as he spoke. I stood there at a loss for words.

 ‘Arthur is throwing Polly a birthday party as the Garrison tonight. I wanted to extend the invitation. Polly has always liked having you around.’ I nearly fainted. John would most definitely be there too. My mouth went dry but I tried to conceal my nerves. 

‘I’d love to, thank you for thinking of me, Tommy.’ 

                                 -------------------------------------

Walking up the cobbled sidewalks towards the Garrison, I clutched the small giftbox in my sweaty palms. It didn’t take long for me to hear the vibrato of instruments playing from inside. Muffled sounds of people yelling and laughing were nearly pouring out of the wide double doors. I didn’t know what the hell I was supposed to be wearing, so I just wore a simple black dress that hugged my frame nicely and hung off my shoulders, exposing my neck and chest. A simple pearl necklace hung from my neck, accentuating my cleavage nicely. I chose to leave my hair down in its natural wavy state. My lips were covered in a light shade of red that matched my blushed cheeks. 

‘Irene!’ A familiar feminine but strong voice yelled immediately after I entered the bright and lively bar. 

I smiled wide as I drew her into a hug. “Happy Birthday! God, you look gorgeous in that dress!’ 

Her beautifully crooked smile made my heart swell. Her presence was always breathtaking. Her fire-red dress glimmered off of the twinkling chandeliers in the room. 

‘Thank you, love! You look stunning, as always. I was so happy to hear from Tommy that you were coming!’ 

I smiled, handing her the small box I had been carrying. A red bow rested on top. 

‘Oh, dear that was not necessary!’ Her laugh was cut off by a gasp when she opened the box. Resting inside was a sparkling hair comb that was studded in white rhinestones. I had stayed a little later at the shop after Tommy had invited me tonight. I decided to quickly make something small and elegant for Polly, something I knew she’d appreciate. 

‘Did you make this?!’ I giggled and shook my head yes. 

‘I’ll definitely have to keep this hidden from Ada, its beautiful! I hope it didn’t take up too much time?’ She asked me, concerned. 

‘It was no trouble at all, Polly! Happy birthday again! I need to grab a drink, I’ll see you soon, yeh?’

‘You surely will, dear!’ She sang as she drunkenly but confidently pushed through the tall crowd of eyeing men. 

I made my way past the lumps of people, finally making it to the end of the bar. I took my glass in hand and rounded back through the bar just to be shoved face first into John’s chest. His eyes were surprisingly bright with interest, not glazed over from drinking. 

Instinctively, I smiled up at his dazzling features. His hair was slicked back, unmoving and a toothpick hung from the end of his splitting smile. There were so many people around that we were practically squished together. I was suddenly very aware of the height difference between us. I was nearly 5’2’’. He was looking down at me in a hungry way.

‘You look very handsome tonight, Mr. Shelby.’ I giggled as his greedy hands swiveled around my wide hips, squeezing all of me between his fingers in a way that might have been inappropriate in this crowded bar. I couldn’t care less. We rarely saw each other outside of my dark flat. I was practically melting in his strong arms, I loved that he was being affectionate in front of his friends and colleagues. It made me feel special, stupidly. 

‘And you look good enough to taste, love.’ He whispered in my ear before planting a soft and quick kiss to the exposed skin on my neck. I was so responsive to him, it was embarrassing. I couldn’t help how my back arched towards him slightly; he was intoxicating to be around. 

I attempted to laugh in order to play off how tightly wound up I was. 

‘You’ll have to work for that from now on.’ I shot him a wicked grin before turning on my heels back to the bar. John was on my heels, though, which is what I wanted. Somehow, through the crowd of people, he jumped in front of me, stopping me in my path.

‘Listen, I tried to stop by. But I got stuck at the bloody fights with Arthur. He was so fucking drunk. I couldn’t leave him there alone. I would’ve stopped by if I could’ve.’ He said all this while holding his hands gently in mine. His eyes were waiting for an answer, to forgive him, like I always do so easily. 

‘You could’ve told me that days ago.’ I sighed out.

‘Yes, I should’ve, but I’m an arse and didn’t. Forgive me?’ He pleaded, pouting his bottom lip out. 

I took a sip of my drink before placing it back onto the bar, getting a good look at him now. I didn’t want to think about my complicated feelings for John or how he blew me off. The only thing I could think about was how badly I needed him to touch me. “Let’s have this conversation another time, yeh? I want to have fun tonight.’ You said before shoving a drink at him. 

He studied me for a few seconds, before letting go of the protest in his mind. ‘Fine by me, love.’ He laughed before downing his drink. 

An hour had passed and John couldn’t keep his hands off of me, which I didn’t mind. We sat at the bar and the conversation and jokes came naturally, like they always do. On the other side of the bar though, I could feel Tommy’s eyes watching me. Every time I looked up at him from the opposite end of the bar, his eyes were already on me. Shyly, I always looked away. But I was now several shots in. I didn’t want to admit that I liked his eyes on me. God what is wrong with me? I finally get John’s attention and now I can’t stop thinking about him and his brother?

John was shouting at the bartender about more shots and joking around with the other men sitting near us. I took the moment to lift my eyes up to meet Tommy’s, and I almost floated over to him before stopping myself. His intense stare never broke. He chuckled from across the bar as I instinctively nibbled my bottom lip at my wandering thoughts. God, what I would let that man do to me.

Breaking me out of my thoughts, I felt John’s warm hand slide up my thigh, eating me up with his eyes. My skin broke out in goosebumps and my breath hitched. I could still feel him watching us from across the room. 

John’s eyebrows creased in question, until he found where my line of vision kept wandering off to. He shot a devilish look back at me. 

‘Tommy told me about his little visit with you the other night.’ Shit. My heart fucking sank. 

I sat there in silence, not knowing what to say in order to keep John from completely freaking out and causing a scene. I wondered why he hadn’t already if he had known Tommy came over,

To my surprise, he started to giggle, sensing the rigidness in my body. To my surprise, he lifted my chin up and planted a sweet but passionate kiss to my lips, knowing that his brother was looking. I couldn’t help the satisfied whimper coming from the back of my throat that only John could’ve heard. I was melting in his hands. He pulled back and smiled. ‘Stop worrying, Irene. You’re a free woman, you can do as you please…whether that’s me or my brother…or both of us.’ 

My hand clamped down on his thigh, squeezing it in comfort. ‘John…nothing happened with me and Tommy.’ He smiled down at me cheekily, already sensing the hesitation in my voice. He already knew exactly how I felt about Tommy. 

‘That doesn’t mean you didn’t want something to happen. Doesn’t even mean it won’t happen eventually’ he leaned in to whisper, ‘Is that what you want, love? You want the both of us? It’s written all over you. You’re such a greedy girl.’ He giggled in a haunting way as his fingers brushed the exposed skin on my arm. The room seemed to spin and I couldn’t believe the words coming out of John’s mouth. I never would’ve expected John, the most possessive man alive right next to his brothers, would be ok with sharing. 

‘What’re you two love birds whispering about?’ Tommy’s low voice boomed from behind us. My eyes shot up to meet his beautiful blue eyes. 

‘Tommy! Perfect timing, brother. We were just talking about you.’ Tommy’s eyebrows curved in curiousity. 

‘Yeh? What about me?’ He sat on the stool next to me, placing me right between the two of them. 

‘I think Irene’s got a little crush on you!’ He yell-whispered to Tommy sarcastically across from me. I shoved his arm harshly to hide the glow on my cheeks. 

‘Jesus John!’ I scolded, making the both of them chuckle in an eerily calm and collected way. Had they already talked about this together? 

‘Is that true, Irene?’ Tommy laughed.

I shoved my face into my hands in embarrassment. “I’m not drunk enough for this.’ I sighed.

A strong hand found its way to the small of my back, making me straighten out. Only, the hand that was rubbing small circles into my back was Tommy’s, not Johns. 

My eyes shot between the both of them in shock. 

‘How about John and I walk you back home, hm? Is that ok with ya?’ Both of their eyes were planted on me, not bothering to notice the entire mob of people around us. My hands grew clammy and my red cheeks bled down my chest.

‘I’d like that.’ 

------------------

The walk back to my place was short. Full of constant laughter and chatter. John annoyed Tommy the whole way there and I couldn’t help but admire the way they bickered back and forth. I never got to see the two of them together like this, so playful. Tommy always had a layer of seriousness, but some of those walls seemed to crash down in John’s company. It was hard to be in a bad mood with him around. 

As we approached the front door of my flat, I turned to face them, they both stood shoulder to shoulder, waiting for me to speak. I had a feeling on how this night was going to play out and I couldn’t miss the opportunity. I didn’t want the night to end. I’d love to live in this tipsy and light state forever. 

‘You’re coming inside, aren’t you? Or is it past your bedtimes?’ I giggled as I fiddled with the keys and doorknob. 

John threw his head back and clutched the front of his coat dramatically. ‘Christ, I thought you’d never ask!’ He laughed before pushing past Tommy and through the front door. 

All three of us sat around my kitchen table playing cards and drinking for a while. The tension would’ve been air tight if it wasn’t for John breaking the ice by making jokes all night. I couldn’t ignore all of the small touches both Tommy and John were giving me. Tommy’s hand would brush across my back occasionally, but nothing more. John was less subtle, sneaking kisses and sitting inches away from me.  

‘I missed you this week, Irene.’ He sighed, leaning forward and pulling my chair forcefully in front of his. As soon as we were practically nose-to-nose, he enveloped me in a searing kiss. His lips moved slowly but no less passionate. His hands slid down my back slowly, stopping at my ass and squeezing lightly. I playfully pushed him off, laughing. Tommy was still seated beside me and John, watching. 

‘John, don’t manhandle me in front of your brother, you’ll make him uncomfortable.’ I half-joked. 

John threw his head back in laughter. ‘Tommy doesn’t get uncomfortable. I’m sure that’s the last thing he’s feeling right now.’ 

I looked back to Tommy who seemed even more angelic up-close. He had shed his jacket and was only in a white button down, his gun holster strapped around his shoulders and chest, showing how large this man actually was. I looked at him in question, never knowing what he was thinking.

‘Come here.’ He said in such a deadly tone that I could never disobey. I looked back at John for a reaction or some sort of protest, but there was none. In fact, he was silent. His eyes seemed to almost turn black as he watched me in anticipation.

I slowly stood up, walking a few steps to stand right above him. His dangerous star made me shiver. I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to be doing, just standing here in front of him. Sensing my nervousness, Tommy was level to my stomach. His eyes never left mine when he reached up to caress the skin under my dress. As his hand squeezed softly around me, he took note of the way my body relaxed. 

Still sitting lazily in the chair from under me, he used his foot to kick my leg open. All in one motion, he grabbed my hips tightly, and led me to cradle his lap. I yelped slightly, not expecting this all to move so quickly, but I wasn’t upset about it. I was full of excitement which weighed out my nervousness. 

I could hear John moving back and forth in his seat, but all I could focus on right now was how close my face was to Tommy’s. All of my senses were filled with him. I rested my hands on his shoulders as his hands slid up to cup my face before reaching up to kiss me. My body pressed into his chest, instantly feeling addicted to the taste of him and the feeling of his mouth on mine. Sparks shot through my body at every touch and every movement he made. His lips were soft and plump, fighting for dominance. Quickly, his tongue snuck its way into my mouth, teasing me slightly. A loud moan crept up my throat and I could feel Tommy smirk into the kiss, satisfied with the effect he had on me. His hands slid up my back to unzip the back of my dress. 

All too quickly, Tommy pulled away, leaving us both breathless. His eyes were wild and full of desire. I smiled down at him before he spoke. ‘How about we make John watch us play as a punishment for neglecting this needy body.’ 

I heard John chuckle eerily from behind us. I turned my head around and raised a questioning eyebrow at him.

‘No fair! I don’t get to play?’ He whined childishly. 

‘I told you that you’d have to work a little harder from now on.’ I teased at him. 

He slouched back in his chair, spreading his legs a bit farther apart, giving me a challenging look. Finally, he nodded to me in a sort of agreement. 

‘Irene.’ My name coming off Tommy’s lips like this almost put me in a trance. I would do anything he wanted when he said my name like that. 

I stood up, leading Tommy to my bed which was only a few steps from where John was in my tiny flat. As I plopped down, John scooted his chair in the direction of us. 

‘Are you sure you want this?’ He sat beside me on the bed, squeezing my hand lightly. 

I shook my head a bit too eagerly. ‘I trust you.’ His lips crashed back into mine. I was still aware of John’s eyes watching us and the small sounds he was making from his chair. 

Tommy’s hands brushed down my skin as he pushed the rest of my unzipped dress down. Tommy eyed every inch of exposed skin. 

He pushed his holsters off his shoulders swiftly, tossing them the floor. My hands greedily unbuttoned his shirt to expose his tight chest that was sprinkled in small scars and a couple tattoos I didn’t know about. 

My hands fell into his soft hair as he inched down my body, not hesitating when pushing past the fabric covering my pussy. Completely naked now, he pushed my thighs apart, letting both himself and John get a view of my pussy. I felt so vulnerable and so exposed to both of them, but the nerves quickly left as Tommy’s head lowered between my legs, letting his fingers graze down my slit. He dipped his finger into my tight hole, collecting the slick wetness into his finger. He watched my face methodically as he sucked the finger into his mouth. 

‘She tastes so sweet, doesn’t she?’ John said huskily as he began to fidget with his zipper, struggling to not stroke himself off. 

Tommy’s eyes were focused on me when he spoke next. “Sweeter than I ever imagined.’ 

Tommy leaned over my body, pushing his lips onto mine, letting me taste myself on his tongue. I inhaled sharply at the contact. My hands shot to his pants, quickly fumbling with the zipper. I wrapped my hand around his throbbing cock, pulling it free. He grunted loudly, giving me a boost of confidence. 

‘Are you ready for me?’ He whispered in my ear, setting me on fire again. I needed him inside of me now. 

‘Please, I need to feel you, Thomas.’ His face softened instantly for a few quick seconds at the use of his real name. He lined himself up with my entrance, staring into my eyes with such passion that I’d never seen before. Pushing his way inside me slowly, he hissed, but his gaze never wavered. He pushed deeper and deeper until bottoming out with a small whimper that made me tighten around him. I felt so full, but in the best way possible. His lips hovered over mine as his forehead fell onto mine. He adjusted to the tightness of me before moving again. 

‘Christ, you feel incredible.’ He said, finally pulling all the way out and pounding back inside of me over and over again, make me gasp for air. Lost in the sensations, I wrapped my legs around his waist, clawing lightly at his muscular back. Finding my center, I peeked over at John, who was now standing to get a better look at me. He was stroking his cock in time with Tommy’s thrust, chest heaving up and down frantically.

Reality suddenly set in as I watched John, thinking he might hate this. Would he be upset with me for this later? Am I betraying him like this?

Tommy must’ve noticed my body’s rigidness and the nervous look on my face. He pushed my face back under him, holding my head in place with both his strong hands as he fucked me so gently now. Each gentle thrust helped me fall farther into the moment with him. I relaxed around him finally, allowing him to move a bit faster. 

‘You’re doing such a good job, love. Focus on me, yeh? Make him pay for not worshipping this beautiful pussy.’ God, I couldn’t deny how sexy this was.

His thrust were slow and deep now, drawing every moan out of me for Tommy to devour. My hips started to meet his in a steady rhythm, fucking myself up into him. My hands were everywhere, falling down his chest and caressing back up to his pretty face panting over me. His breath held a strong scent of whiskey, sending my head spiraling. 

‘Does my cock feel better than his? I know it does. Tell me how good I feel inside you.’ He said in a slightly submissive and approval seeking way, whispering so that I was the only one to hear him. I couldn’t deny that this felt so much different than with John. This was all so unfamiliar and exciting. Tommy had a way about himself that I couldn’t explain. 

‘God, you feel amazing in me Tommy. I feel so full of you.’ I panted into him, only for his ears to hear. A small chuckle escaped him and he pressed his lips onto my neck again. I turned to face John who was about to come undone.

Before I could think, Tommy pulled me up to his chest before flipping me over, so that I was on-top of him. He looked stunning laying underneath me like this. His eyelids were heavy and his chest was heaving up and down. It started to feel like it was just Tommy and I here alone in my room. 

I pressed my hands firmly into his chest as I fucked myself down on his dick. I threw my head back and focused on my movements. I was bouncing up and down so harshly, each time I moved down, a loud grunt left Tommy, edging me on. His hands grabbed firmly onto my hips and he fucked up into me so much more harshly. I gasped, mouth hanging open and unable to move. Each time his cock shot up into me, I came closer and closer to the edge of my building orgasm. 

‘You’re close?’ He panted out, redirecting my attention on his angelic features. I shook my head yes, unable to form words right now. His hand moved down in-between us, rubbing fast and tight circles into my clit. I clamped my eyes shut, trying to contain the building pressure. I was a total goner now.

I felt his soft hands gently brush across my face, making my lids flutter open.

‘I am too. Come for me, love. Can you do that?’ He said, still fucking my core relentlessly.  

‘Yes, Tommy…I’m gonna come…’ I moaned out loudly before the flood gates broke open. My mouth hung in a silent cry and my hands clawed down his chest. I came so hard around him black spots clouded my vision. My entire body slowly lit on fire, every inch of my body shaking with pleasure. I came harder than I ever have in that moment. Tommy lifted my ass up with his hands and fucked me through the extreme pleasure. His thrusts became sloppy as his orgasm followed close behind mine. With a few final thrusts, I watched his face contort and then finally relax completely as his hot cum filled me up completely, spilling out the sides of me. I might become obsessed with this expression. After what felt like minutes of whimper and moans of bure bliss, I laid my head on his chest, still buried onto his cock. I felt him twitch inside of me as I tried to catch my breath. His hands rubbed up and down my back lightly, reminding me that we had company here still. It was so silent, the only sounds that filled the room were the panting coming from me and Tommy. He stared up at me in awe, giving me the softest smile that made me melt. I never wanted him to leave my bed. 

Finally, I moved off of him, falling to his side and turning to look at John who was fully clothed again, looking a bit pissed off. I hadn’t even known he had came and recomposed himself all while we were fucking. Did I not hear him at all?

‘If I didn’t know any better, I would’ve guessed you two were in love. The fuck was all that about?’

Taglist: @lyarr24

@forgottenpeakywriter

@casa-boiardi

@tigernach575

@crabat-the-queen

@adaydreamaway08

@trixie23

@sunset24t

@star017

@oizyss88,

@mrkdvidal1989

@powellssaturn

@babayaga67

[frozenjokes]

A Meeting Of Three Future Pirates (i enjoyed this little scene and wanted to draw a little thing)

in which Scar refuses to tell Mumbo his name, and Grian is determined to get an answer

Ao3 Link for the fic!

***

Luckily, the day passed without incident. That is, until Mumbo turned around and Grian was gone.

Gone and already halfway across the docks towards Pirate- for goodness sakes, what did Mumbo expect! Why had he described him so accurately? Not that it was difficult to pick Pirate out in a crowd, he stood out just as much as Mumbo did- augh! And now, here Mumbo was with an armful of cleaning supplies, bumbling while Grian was making a beeline towards a bad decision.

“Hello there, sir! Might I have a moment of your time?” Grian spoke before Mumbo could, and Pirate, quick as ever, wasted no time before turning around.

“Well hello there! What might a mysterious cloaked figure such as yourself be looking for?” The salesman lilt was in full display, Pirate facing Grian with open arms. Grian turned briefly back to Mumbo with a quick wink. Oh god. Mumbo dropped what he was carrying and hurried forward, but stopped in a strangled breath as he opened his mouth. He couldn’t call either of their names; he didn’t even know Pirate’s, but Grian’s was just as bad to yell on a crowded dock. Mumbo didn’t get to make a decision before Grian continued.

“A name, if you have one,” Grian smirked, and Mumbo couldn’t see his face, but he knew Grian was smirking, “See, I’m here on behalf of Mumbo Jumbo, we’re acquaintances-“

“His last name is Jumbo?”

“Yes, it’s very silly-”

“I don’t think so! Well, I do think so a little bit, but in a good way! It’s kind of whimsical, yeah? You guys are friends? Ah, that makes sense. He gets so worked up about the name thing it’s- oh! There he is behind you! Hello Mum-”

“Shut it!” Grian pointed hard at Pirate’s face, so aggressively, his hood nearly came off, but other than a quiet ‘oh, okay,’ Pirate didn’t look discouraged at all. Quite the contrary actually, which could only be an awful sign- “I’m here for your name, and if you don’t tell me, I’m gonna tell you what he’s called you.”

“Gri- G- Please don’t do that!” Mumbo tried, but only Pirate paid him any mind, smiling and waving in a fashion that made his heart beat a little faster.

Pirate laughed, clearly irritating Grian, though he didn’t give any indication that he noticed, only looking back at him brightly, “Funny coincidence! I was actually wondering about that! I’ve tried asking, I’ve even offered to guess, but Mumbo doesn’t have the same appreciation for games that I do. Just between you and I though, secretly, I think he likes guessing-”

Mumbo bristled, unable to help himself, “I do not like guessing!” but even Pirate ignored him this time, Grian holding all of his attention.

“I wouldn’t be so sure you want to know.”

“Oh believe me, I do! Not much phases me, I’ll tell you that much. Go ahead and hit me!” Pirate was clearly not prepared for Grian to take that literally, but Mumbo winced as he said it, knowing full well Grian could never help himself, and sure enough, his fist landed squarely in Pirate’s gut before Mumbo could even say a word of warning. Pirate gasped, folding over, but Grian jumped back like he’d been stung, eyes wide under his cloak.

“PIRATE!! PIRATE!! HELP!!”

If Grian had any talent at all, it was pointing and screaming. The dock erupted, sailors and fishermen and everyone else having returned from their trips for the evening, all spurred into action by the shrill (and if Mumbo was being honest, quite feminine sounding) scream. Mumbo, only a close distance away by now, ran forward in an attempt to help, but despite being stronger than most people tended to assume, he was no match against the beefy, adrenaline filled sailors with everything to lose.

[sunflowervoltwentyeight]

Happy 28th! Here’s my May 2023 fic rec! So many great fics, organized by word count. Enjoy!!!

Stranger Stars by shaylea (212k)

Five years ago, Africa offered a grieving Louis Tomlinson an escape from an England he couldn't tolerate. Now it's become home as he leads overland tours across the continent with his best friend and driver Zayn Malik. What's meant to be just another ordinary six-week trip from Cape Town to Nairobi turns into anything but, when future lawyer/current photographer and songwriter Harry Styles and his friends join Louis' latest set of passengers.

Own the Scars by crinkle-eyed-boo / @crinkle-eyed-boo (144k)

“But I don’t belong here,” Louis insists. “Why do you say that?” James asks. “These people are all drug addicts and alcoholics,” Louis shrugs. Something sparks in James’ eyes. “And you’re not?”

Louis has never felt like he was good enough: for his stepdad, for his life-long best friend, for the life he's supposed to want. After an accident that nearly costs him his life, Louis' parents send him to rehab where he’s forced to face his demons. On the long and difficult road to recovery, Louis must confront the truths he’s been avoiding about his future, his relationships, and his sense of self-worth. Because before he can love anyone else, he’s got to learn how to love himself first.

Run Away Home by hattalove / @hattalove (106k)

Louis stands, in the middle of a clearing with his hands in his pockets, and stares. This boy—God, this gorgeous, gorgeous boy. He seems so clumsy, confused at the best of times, but there’s a wisdom about him as he speaks, a maturity that belies his age.

Louis is hopelessly, wildly attracted to him.

or, louis is a successful jockey down on his luck, struggling to get his life back on track after an injury. harry has a horse, a house fit for a prince, and a broken heart.

it takes them a while to figure out that they need each other.

Love of My Life by likelarry / @likelarryfics (80k)

Harry is 36 and recently divorced after he's finally come to terms with his sexuality.

Louis is the 28 year old who helps him find his way and is everything Harry has ever dreamt of.

The one where Harry struggles to really accept who he is and Louis is there every step of the way.

And I’m Weeping Warm Honey and Milk (That You Stay Surrounding Me) by  fangirlflailings (78k)

Louis is a first-year medical student, still a little tender as he recovers from a personal trauma. Harry works, amongst other things, as a professional cuddler, though he comes with baggage of his own. They don’t mean it to, but the intimacy that blooms between them quietly changes them both.

Your Memory Over Me by shimmeringevil / @shimmeringevil (64k)

Three years have passed since Louis last saw him, but all it took was a few minutes in Harry’s presence for him to be relegated to the desperate twenty-one year old that was practically begging his boyfriend for an ounce of reassurance that he still cared about him.

Harry shouldn’t be here. He’s brought too many unresolved feelings with him, that Louis thought he’d never have to face.

It’s Harry’s apparent apathy that’s the most difficult to come to terms with. Anger, he could handle. Regret, he would welcome. But Harry’s amiability, and carefree demeanor can only be born from indifference.

He’s moved on. He doesn’t care. And that is something Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever be strong enough to face.

-

OR - The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.

You Taught Me How To Love (You Taught Me How To Stop) by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (50k)

"I was always better at hand to hand than you," Harry growls, even as he leans his weight into the blade. It's small, sharp, has a handle of gold roses.

"I don't know about that." Louis moves his arm forward, makes the presence of the barrel of the gun fit snugly to Harry's hip. "I think we just play differently."

"You going to shoot me?" Harry asks, those wild eyes tracking over Louis' face. "Do it."

"I think I've put enough scars on you," Louis answers, means it about the stretch marks still lining the sides of Harry's stomach, but it lands a little too raw. There are other scars on Harry's body that Louis blames himself for, scars inside too.

[nerdieforpedro]

Wyrms and Soggy Milk

Chapter Three of Fire and Fury

Pero Tovar x Calista (fat/plus size OFC)

My entire masterlist and blog are for readers 18+ MDNI. I do not consent to my work being used in AI, recommended on TikTok, borrowed or plagiarized.

Summary: Arriving at the church was supposed to be a reprieve, it proves to be anything but. By the end of their continued troubles , Pero ends up confused and in a tub. Calista may have the advantage.

Warnings: (Dark Fic/DDDNE - violence and threats of SA) time-period misogyny, blood, mentions of some gore, insults, mention of sex work, way too much milk talk, unlawful use of scales (unsure if there's a lawful use?), Pero in a tub

Word Count: about 5.2k

Notes: I tried my best with writing fight scenes, I think the chapter ended up long because of it but they should make sense. It’s my second or third time writing one so I’m hopeful? 🤔 Let me know how it reads.

Main Masterlist/ Pero Tovar Masterlist/ AO3 Link

Meeting the Father

The sun hung low in the sky by the time they reached the church Pero and William had stopped by before heading into the forest yesterday. The trio had settled from their bickering as fatigue and hunger quieted them. Father Ignacio spotted them in the distance. He recognized the two men, but had never seen the woman before, she didn’t look like anyone from his flock from the nearby village.

As the small group comes closer, the priest is able to make out more details about the woman with the two mercenaries: this does not bode well for him. He was hopeful maybe she was older, but she appears young, full-bodied with a silver and light green dress stained with blood. Her hair is an unusual mix of the same mint green and black. What draws Father Ignacio is her lips, a vibrant bold pink. Such a color on a woman and given her clothing, he assumes that the two men have found a woman of the night to share for the night possibly, though there is something about her that doesn’t quite fit with the usual defeated look of those women. For one to enter the church, he must make it clear to Pero and William that no matter what they may have paid for, no such activity can take place under God’s house.

“Hey Father! I found him! I found Pero! You were wrong, though I’m not quite sure what happened after but we’re all okay I think.” William bounced up to the older gentleman and hugged him. Pero scoffed and Calista stood behind the Spaniard. She’s weary of men in robes, they tend to call her kind the embodiment of evil and try to hunt them. Not that any of their so-called holy relics to any more than make dragons itch. She feels vulnerable since she knows she’s weaker than normal. 

“I see that Will. Who is your lady companion? I don’t remember either of you mentioning a third person.” Father Ignacio’s eyes are fixed on Calista, those sinful lips, bright honey eyes that have what looks to be paint on her eyelids. Some of the noblewomen wore adornments like that on their faces. Draws men into temptation, makes them commit acts they wouldn’t normally. But she cannot be turned away, the sun is nearly gone from the sky now and darkness is taking hold of the heavens. Such horror would befall a woman like her if left alone. “What is your name my girl?” The priest didn’t mean for it to sound vulgar, but she brings it out of him. He’ll need to be far away from her but this woman proves captivating. The Father would rather not put too much distance between them. A healthy about, room enough for The Lord if you will.

“This is Calista. We rescued her from some wolves in the forest. She’s staying with us so we can see her into town. She got lost while traveling.” William explained and Pero nodded. Ignacio assumed that what the pale one said was indeed a lie, but one to likely preserve her dignity given who the priest believes she really is. 

“That will not be acceptable William. She’ll need her own room. This is the house of the Lord after all. Come. Let’s get the three of you cleaned and fed.” He smiles and William returns it, Pero does briefly and Calista doesn’t smile at all. They follow the older man into the inner part of the church past the congregation hall. He stops and points that William and Pero will share a room at the end of the long hallway they have turned down. Calista’s room would be in the middle of the hallway since normally there are men studying to be priests there but given the notoriety or the forest, few come to accept the call. 

“I would prefer to stay with my protectors, good sir.” Calista informed the priest, feeling the words were foreign on her tongue. He’s been watching her this entire time. She may be a young dragon and had limited experience in the human world but she knows how many men view women, especially men whose eyes follow her with such clear intentions. Instinctively, she crosses her arms to cover her chest, much of which is exposed from the low cut of her dress. Now he wishes to separate her from the group, such a basic tactic.

“I agree with the lady Father. She is our responsibility and should remain with us.” Pero steps between her and the Father. He knows men like this priest, who act holier than most but if given the funds, access and anonymity, they would live in a brothel. Father Ignacio takes a step back, the Spaniard is intimidating to say the least and the priest is sure that he has no qualms about spilling blood in a house of God. William is watching the exchange between the three and is trying to think of a compromise, it’s a bad one, but it’s better than being run out of the village for killing this man.

“Father. Pero. Let’s just sort this out.” His hands are raised as the pale warrior speaks. “Now, Father,” William turns to face Ignacio, “Miss Calista is under our protection. We can’t very well leave her unattended and unguarded, that would go against the agreement we’ve made to see her safely home.” He slaps his palms on the Father’s shoulders and smiles. “Now I believe, there should be two sleeping quarters next to each other because I know that’s what your true issue lies despite it not being a true concern at all.” The priest begrudging looks at Calista, then Pero, and back to Calista. He is not convinced that there will not be some sort of illicit activity happening, but it is also a fair alternative. He has lost this round, but the battle is not over yet.

“Fine young William. I shall show you all two rooms that should work and are side by side.” The older man huffs and walks down the long hallway and turns the corner. Neither William nor Pero realized the church was quite this large when they first came here though they’d only been in the vestibule and chapel, never any further. Calista’s head is swiveling side to side observing the tapestries hanging on the wall, gold and silver adorning the walls and various prayers etched in Latin. That part seemed strange, usually words aren't etched into the walls of churches. There's too many questions raised about these priests here to Calista, but she remains silent for now. She needs to keep playing the part of the helpless woman. She hated the role and that it was closer to the truth than she would ever admit. The four finally reached the two rooms that Ignacio had to offer. Each room had two twin beds, were clean, had a nightstand and two candles each that could be lit for light. There was a door in the middle connecting the two rooms, the priest said that he would be right back with a change of clothes for each of them. The three inspected the rooms and were satisfied by the accommodations. 

“I'm looking forward to sleeping somewhere soft.” Calista plopped down on one of the twin beds in the first room, Pero was finishing up a walk through of the second room, it was quick as both rooms were equally small. William nodded, sitting across from the young dragon on the opposite bed. He sighed and was trying to figure out better sleeping arrangements, this wasn't what he expected from a man of the cloth. He looked for the good in people which wasn't always there, no matter what their station or profession. Pero stood with arms crossed, scowl on his face per usual, except this time he was squinting his eyes at William.

“William, we can't stay here. I don't care what you told that priest. I know you're still recovering from what that gray dragon did but you saw how that bastard-” He raises his hand and Pero huffs. 

“Look, I know Pero. How was I supposed to know he was like this? He's a priest!” William laments, rubbing his temples. Normally, the church takes any and everyone who walks through their doors. Apparently, the two mercenaries have the unfortunate luck of finding one of the corrupt ones. Always their lot. One break, could they just get one break?!

“You can't trust any of them. They're all assholes. How are we getting out of here?” The Spaniard is set on leaving. Calista rolls her eyes and stands to pinch Pero's nose. “Mierda (shit)! What was that for?!” He quickly grabs his nose as she takes a step back, clicking her tonuge. 

“You two are ridiculous. Yes, he is disgusting, but there are warm beds and you're forgetting that I am a dragon - human form yes, but a dragon. It will be in that priest's best interest to leave me be. If he does not, he'll go meet the god he speaks of.” Her eyes flash jade to match the wicked smile that graces her face. Pero throws his hands up and sits on the bed opposite William where Calista once sat. 

“Do what you want, dragón pequeño (little dragon). You're clearly going to.” Pero still hates this entire idea. He'd sleep outside at this rate, and he always prefers a bed over the ground any day. Calista was about to make another remark, but there's a knock at the door. Father Ignacio is back.

William is the one who answers the door, he knows if Pero answers it, he might punch the father in the face to start. A forced smile is on his face as he greets the portly priest, hopefully for the last time tonight. “I brought changes of clothes for all three of you. You can wash up before eating.” Is what the older man leads with. Gods, he won't quit will he?

“Thank you Father. We're tired so we're just going to wash our hands, eat, sleep, then be up early in the morning. Want to get Calista safely to the village. Need an early start for that.” At this point, just having food and uninterrupted sleep are luxuries. Frowning, Ignacio nods and carries the clothes as he walks the trio to a small wash area where two seminarians are finishing up cleaning their hands before quickly leaving upon seeing the two mercenaries. Their eyes linger on Calista as it's rare for women to be in this part of the church outside of the nuns who visit on occasion and especially during the night. After washing their hands, sitting down to eat a meal was not the worst. Their bellies were full for the time being and the stew had a passible taste. The walk back to their rooms was unaccompanied by the good father. Pero insisted that Calista sleep in one of the twin beds and William sleep on the floor. He could use one of the mattresses. When asked why he would be the one to sleep on the floor, Pero snickered.

“You made a fuss about stopping in at the local church. Even though I told you we would have been better off to skip it. That's your bed.” At this, William sucked his teeth. Yeah he had told Pero that, but in all the other churches they've visited in their travels, only one other priest was filled with something other than the holy spirit.

“Fine. I'll just be happy to be on something other than the ground, though it won't be much better. As long as I can finally get some sleep.” Pero and William dragged a mattress off one of the beds in the other room and placed it on the floor. Calista gave William her blanket stating that she was still warm from the stew. 

“Don't complain you're cold later.” Is all Pero said before pulling his blanket over himself and rolling over to face the wall. William and Calista looked at each other and sighed, they exchanged goodnights, “Be quiet. I thought we were all supposed to be sleeping.” The three drifted off to sleep for a few hours. But one of them woke up. 

Getting out of bed, Calista thankfully retained her enhanced vision, able to see Pero and especially William so she wouldn't step on him. She exited the room and stood in the hallway. It was slightly cooler, but her body still felt so warm, from the inside out. She ate the same soup as the two men and neither one of them was awake. Was it because she's a dragon and not used to human food? She recalled where the mess hall was and assumed there should be a kitchen not too far from there, somewhere she could get something to drink, preferably water. She passed by one of the seminarians who directed her to the kitchen and walked with Calista, even pouring some water for her. He asked if she wanted to be escorted back and she declined stating that she won't be long, she misses her warm bed already. He gives her a slight bow and leaves which gives her pause, why would he bow? She leans against one of the counters, sipping the water slowly, she's hoping that will make the cool feeling last a bit longer.

“Your senses have become quite dull Calista. You have fallen quite far, you might be in what the humans refer to as hell right now. Quite ironic given where we are.”

Calista’s back straightens and she gags on her water, coughing as she spins to turn in the direction of the voice. It's a man who's a full head taller than her, but still shorter than Pero. His build is slender, but muscular. His voice is high pitched with every word wounding like a sneer. She knows it all too well, but what would he be doing here? It's much too soon, neither her nor Pero are ready to encounter him here. They're both still adjusting to their new forms. 

“Nothing to say to me sweet Calista? Where is that fiery spark that cut me before?” Setting the glass down, the young dragon slowly backs up, keeping her eyes focused on her would-be attacker. She knows he will, just a matter of when, she's still burning up, even after finishing the water. “Trying to leave me so soon. You want to run back to your new human toy? I wasn't aware that was your type. I could see how I would not be a match for you. That matters little, it only means I'll have to work that much harder to breed you.”

“To hell with you Acanthus! I will never allow you to.” Her eyes flash jade once more and she lengthens her nails into crimson claws. She'll need to fight to have a sliver of a chance to make it out. Focusing is so difficult. He closes the distance as she jumps back, only to be caught by Father Ignacio, he was not only a filthy minded priest, but a wyrm. A lesser dragon that can be under the command of a young, great or elder dragon. His facial features have contorted into a longer, more reptilian face with a long tongue that slides across Calista's cheek while his black claws dig into the flesh of her shoulders. She shakes side to side to try and free herself, but she's too weak to even escape his grasp. “Dammit! Dammit!” Calista tries to call for Pero, summoning him using the same mental command she used when he fought her mother, but she can't seem to connect with him. 

“Her skin even tastes sweet, Master. May I have a taste? While she is in this form? She is of little use to you in this form, yes?” Ignacio's speech has become subservient and simple. How did she miss it? What else has she not picked up on? Her senses are truly this poor? Did she miscalculate how much of herself she transferred to Pero? Acanthus smiles, his skin has a gray pallor to it, even in his human form that makes him look like a ghoul, matched with his yellow eyes and red lines on his neck, it isn't that far off from his dragon form. 

“I may allow you to do so my minion while I watch. She'll be begging for me afterward. This one is quite depraved and that's coming from me as you well know Calista.” Her eyes widen at the implication, she spits on Acanthus’ white and silver robes. “What makes this better is that you don't even know why you can't call your toy? Did you not notice the change in your body? I had the good father behind you add something special to your bowl of soup. A few of my scales for seasoning. You didn't forget what that does right?” His thin fingers cup her chin as she stares at him, realizing the gravity of the situation. Consuming his scales means that she's connected to him. Even for the week that he held her captive, she managed to avoid eating them, no matter how hard he tried. It was why she was so hungry, eating anything in his lair could have meant a loss of control. Maybe due to her essence bond with Pero, that's why she wasn't under his command, but it also meant that she couldn't reach him either.

Dreams into Reality

Tovar doesn't often remember his dreams. There's darkness and then he awakes, lives, sleeps and repeats. Tonight is the first time in a long time that he dreams. That damn dragon is in his dream, holding his head on her lap. Stroking his hair, never would she do something so tender. She hates him and he hates her too. He is aware that he needs her to stay alive, that much is certain. That disgusting priest pops up, leering at Calista, but Pero doesn't move, head still in her lap and neither does she. Fire begins to burn around them and they disappear, the next thing he knows is that he is standing. Calista is in front of him, but that dirty old man is holding her arms behind her. Why won't she break free? Pero knows she's strong enough, but she's crying. He hears a man's shrill laughter and Calista screaming.

Pero awakens with his head pounding, he notices a faint green glow in the room, it seems to be coming from his head, the left side where his scar is. “What the hell is this? Is this what happened before? Wait…” Pero looks over at Calista's side of the room and sees her bed empty. “Godammit this fucking woman! Get up William! She's gone and likely in danger!” Rising out of bed, Pero kicks Will's side and grabs his broadsword and small swords, arming himself before leaving the room. Will is soon right behind him still groggy. Tovar finds that he can't pinpoint where she is, just a general direction. “This way!” He starts off down the corridor but is met by two of the seminarians. “Choir boys out of the way lest I cut you both down!” Will draws his sword as he and Pero watch them change into large snakes.

“If I ever mention, setting foot in a damn church again. Punch me hard Pero and remind me of this moment.” Will lunges toward the first snake cutting its head off with ease, the purple blood that splatters on the wall eats away at the tapestry and stone. “Be careful! Looks like the blood is high acidic!” Pero makes short work of the other snake, lobbing its head off and having some of the blood splash on his cuirass, it eats through part of it, exposing the leather under the iron. The two men race toward the mess hall where they hear a scream and a crash.

The white dragon is laughing as he sees Ignaco bleeding from a severed arm. “Master, why will you not help me?!” He whines, Acanthus sits on the counter shaking his head. His master had promised him a taste of this dragon turned human, to play with her before he took her back to his lair. Ignacio almost had her. Calista had been pinned to the ground, but she was able to get in a fire breath directly in his face. It didn't hurt him much, but with her claws she was able to take an arm and use it to get a few hits to the wyrm’s head before it broke in half. The entire ordeal was entertaining to the white dragon. Watching his future broodmare fight filled him with an unwarranted pride, the mother of his hatchlings needed to be strong after all. 

Battered and bloodied, Calista didn't see a way out alive. Her best bet would be to end her life while killing this wyrm. If she tried earlier, Acanthus would step in and let the wyrm have her arm or no arm. If she did so after, she would risk trying to overpower the white dragon which she knew was impossible in her current state. it had been difficult enough in her full dragon form. There were no good options, but at least Pero might be none the wiser and would go peacefully in his sleep, maybe. He may have been a rude bastard, but he did try and help her for the little time she knew him. She could have been nicer, but it was too late to dwell on that now. “Maybe he wasn't so bad. Not a complete reprobate.”

“That right arpia pequeña (little dragon)? Only upon threat of death do you say something nice about me? Dragons have the same manners as humans then.” A silver blade met Calista a few inches away from her face, leaving her covered with purple blood. It didn't burn her nor her dress as both were naturally resistant. The wyrm fell to the floor convulsing in pain from the hole in its chest.

“Master…help me. I…my promise…” Its eyes alternated between Calista and Acanthus, ending on its Master as the light faded from them. Pero and William leaped to stand in front of Calista as she smiled, a genuine one at the both. Her focus quickly turned to Acanthus who wore a similar scowl to Pero's now.

“The two rats have come to play have they? No matter. I'll kill the pale one and separate your limbs from your body so you cannot pursue us mercenary.” Red and white flames gathered in his hands as he got off the counter.

“Why the hell are you calling me pale? You’re the one who looks like spoiled milk!” William shouts and Pero snorts. The white dragon answers with a fireball in William's direction, he rolls out of the way, but now the wooden counter is on fire. Pero uses the opportunity to try and slice Acanthus’ head off, but the dragon catches his blade with his hands, his surprise is that his hands are bleeding.

“It seems the bond you have with her is stronger than I thought. No matter. I'll still kill you.” He pulls Pero's broadsword down and breathes white flames in the mercenary's face. Calista threw up a jade barrier to protect him, it did but unfortunately it broke. William took the opportunity to sink his sword into Acanthus’ side. The white dragon growled and threw the pale mercenary off, his sword still stuck in his abdomen. “Filthy human scum!!” The villain's eyes turn white and flames simmer from his body. Calista recognizes the pattern on the flames, Acanthus is preparing for a large-scale attack. The young dragon pulls Pero by his chainmail and dives near William to huddle the three of them together and forms another barrier.

“Brace yourselves! I don't know if I can completely block it!” Calista raises the jade again. She's forgone her crimson claws and is focusing all her energy into the barrier. Pero places a hand on her shoulder and feels some of his energy fading, he leans his forehead on the back of her shoulder. Will huddles close to the both of them as the heat in the room intensifies and the flames off of Acanthus’ body are becoming brighter. All three of them close their eyes to prevent being blinded and there's a loud boom coupled with an explosion. 

They thought they would be knocked against the walls of the church, but there were none anymore. William was the furthest back so he ended up hitting some rubble on the side of the church. Only one wall far opposite of the kitchen was left standing, the rest had either been completely obliterated or were dotted pieces of smoldering stone embedded into the ground. William’s sword that had been stuck in Acanthus’ side was sticking out of one of the nearby stones, flung from his body. The sun was rising and Pero was face down in the dirt once more. Twice in two days. “Fuck…” His entire body ached but it at least felt like he had all of his limbs. His head is ringing and he can at least make out shapes though given how much rubble is everywhere it doesn't help much. There's some movement that he can make out followed by a deep growl. Pero assumes that's the damn white dragon but that when his sight finally clears upon hearing the word ‘bastard’ screamed with a wet gurgle. Acanthus has his hand on Calista's throat, her claws are much shorter but she's making cuts in his forearm, he's lifted her up off the ground. 

“Did you enjoy your last little bit of freedom? I think I will kill them both. I’ll figure out a way to end the one with the scar. That bastard burned my hands? How much of yourself did you give to him?” Acanthus bends his arm to close the distance between them. He sees the fear in her eyes buried underneath the hatred. “You care about one of their ilk? They vilify us despite us only bothering them if they trespass on our lands. Such a horrid fortune I have that you are the only viable female our clan has to offer.”

“Then go find another one asshole.” Calista continues to struggle, she won’t go with him willingly and not without a fight. “And yes I prefer Pero to you.” She laughs and spits blood in the white dragon’s face. “Will’s right, you do look like spoiled milk. A dingy shade of white.” He spins her around and throws her against one of the larger pieces of remaining stone. The young dragon gasps, coughing up blood as she attempts to move but cannot. Her body isn't allowing it. Pero is able to stand to his feet as his left eye glows a bright jade again, only this time, green flames have gathered in his right hand.

“Stay the hell away from her you soggy fucker!” Acanthus expects to be able to stop Pero, maybe even a burn this time as well. He did not anticipate being pushed back and needing to dig his heels into the ground. Their fingers were interlocked and their flames burning in nearly equal amounts. It was the first time Acanthus had appeared surprised during this entire ordeal. Neither of them were giving a quarter as the ground began to sizzle. “What's wrong? Is one of the filthy humans holding you hostage?” Pero taunts and hears the white dragon growl. 

Calista is finally on her feet watching the two men be evenly matched. It occurs to her that they might be able to kill him here. She focuses and circles behind the soggy dragon, putting all the energy she was left into her right hand, sharpening her scarlet claws. She starts running, building momentum to strike him from behind and hit him square in the chest for a final blow. In strengthening herself, Pero weakened slightly, enough for Acanthus to push the mercenary back and change the angle at which her attack was going to hit. She was going too fast and couldn't change her direction. Her claws went through Acanthus, but missed his core. Thankfully, it was a strong enough hit to have him cry out in pain. Tovar attempted to bash his face in, but a white barrier repelled them as the grand dragon held his hand over the hole in his chest.

“You bitch…the audacity to harm me?! Next time I will end you, all of you! To hell with breeding you, you'll suffer a slow death Calista.” Acanthus attempted to transform into his dragon form but found that he could not. “The hell have you done to me?!” 

Calista pointed to the back of her hand that was covered in his blue blood. Half of one of her magenta scales was missing. It glimmered within the hole in his chest, the scale itself was seeping into the surrounding tissue, weakening him. “Looks like you're on our level now, spoiled milk.” He screamed a string of curses while extending white wings from his back and taking off. Pero stood up and helped the young dragon to her feet. “Ran like a soggy bitch.” The Spaniard laughed at the woman's foul mouth.

“We survived. How did you know that would work?” He was curious if she'd planned that far ahead. Pero retrieved his sword and Will's then scanned the area for him.

“I figured if he could poison me with his scales, I could do the same. I didn't know if it would work or not. That was some favor with whatever gods there are.” Placing her hands on her lower back, she stretches and points to a large piece of stone where Will is slumped over. Tovar and Calista make their way over and are relieved to find William breathing. 

“Figured you'd half ass something again. Do you ever plan anything woman? You're the fucking dragon.” Pero scoffs and puts one arm of William’s over his shoulder as Calista does the same. 

“Oh? When's the last time you fought a grand dragon Pero? Or bonded someone's soul to yours? I'm new to all of this too. Stop your complaining and show me the way to the village. Maybe this time we can actually sleep in a bed for more than a few hours.” Calista rolls her eyes and walks side by side with Tovar to balance Will between them. They mainly bicker most of the way.

Once finally at the village, they decide the best course of action is to leave Will with a woman who he saved on one of their last jobs here. Her husband may have suspiciously died during said job, but unexpected things happen as a mercenary. Pero did offer her two gold coins to care for him, but she offered to do it for free. Instead, the money was used for a room at the inn. Tovar was surprised that Calista did not argue for a seperate room. 

“There's a lot we'll need to discuss and take care of Pero. No need to waste money.” Is what she told him which he was fine with. They have needed to talk about what changes both their bodies have been through since this entire ‘bonding’ process has taken place. 

What Tovar is confused about is why Calista is standing before him while he's soaking in his large bathtub on the floor. Naked.

Chapter Two. Chapter Four

[abubblingcandle]

Word for the week: therapy, city, fire, knee

Therapy - A Treatment Room Doors Moment Extended Cut (basically before I decided that ATRDM would work best only in Roy POV I had some other scenes plotted out and so going to post them as a seperate thing)

“I just, I just want them to like me again you know,” Jamie sighs thumping down onto the seat across from Keeley. She sighed, carrying on typing on her laptop. She had hoped that Jamie seeming more emotionally mature and just being her friend not her boyfriend now would mean that she didn’t have to do this anymore. Jamie was sweet, it was what had drawn her to him in the first place, but his emotional regulation and maturity were rock bottom on the scale. As his girlfriend she expected to have to do some of the emotional legwork for him but as his friend, god she was so tired of it. She sent the email she had been working on a pushed her laptop shut. Good job they literally had someone who’s job it was to listen to Jamie whine. “Come on Jamie,” she sighed, getting to her feet and waving for him to follow her. “Oh ok. We can walk and talk,” Jamie shrugged and continued to make his point about how he just wanted people to notice he was trying to change. Keeley sighed again. She really didn’t have time for this. They climbed up the stairs and Keeley pushed the partially open door to Dr Sharon’s office. “Jamie, this is Dr. Fieldstone. She's a brilliant therapist and, unlike me, she actually gets paid to listen to you complain,” Keeley gestured to Sharon with a tense smile. “Oh, right. Um, sorry doc but I already go to therapy like,” Jamie stammered looking between Dr Sharon and Keeley looking like a kicked puppy. “Really?” Keeley squeaked before her brain caught up. She thought this was going to be a fight to get Jamie to see someone to talk to … not that he already had. “Yeah, she’s called Lucy and she’s ace. We chat on the phone now I ain’t in Manchester,” Jamie shrugs as if this was no big deal. “No offence doc. Just don’t really need two do I?” Jamie smiles awkwardly to Sharon.

City - from God Forbid You Leave Me (like everybody else did)

“This is a genuine question Jamie,” Higgins sighed, pulling over a far too small stool to perch by Jamie’s bed. He reached out to lay his hand on the top of the duvet that was covering the entirety of Jamie’s balled up form. “So I don’t want you to get mad,” Higgins added. Hearing no complaints from inside Jamie’s cocoon he decided to press on. “Do you actually want to go back to City or does that just feel like what everyone is expecting you to do?” “I gotta,” the mound mumbled. “Do you?” Higgins asked, starting to move his hand on top of the duvet trying to provide some comfort to the distressed young man. There was a pause, the feeling of the duvet rising and falling the only sign that there was something alive in there.

Fire - From Roll Call Ch3

“I’ve booked out basically a whole Travelodge for anyone that isn’t admitted and we are going to get to you as soon as it is safe to do so. Anything else I can do to help Colin?” Higgins asked and Colin huffed a laugh. “It’s all on fire Higgins. It’s all on fire. Everyone is so hurt and I’m not so I’ve got to help and I’ve only found two players so far, fat load of good I’m doing,” Colin mumbled, his breath catching in his throat after every word. “You are doing a wonderful job Colin,” Sam’s voice startles Colin. His head shoots up and he nearly drops the borrowed phone to the ground, only catching it with the tips of his fingers at the last second.

Knee - from The Richmond Job Ch14

“Roy, your knee!” Keeley hissed, pulling Roy into the stairwell before the real guard rounded the corner. “You are supposed to be in bed. God, you should be in hospital not just bed,” she rambled, holding his by the shoulders and checking he somehow hadn’t got more injured on the walk here. “I have been in bed long enough and no fucking hospitals you know that. You’re not supposed to be here either,” Roy growled, peering through the glass of the stairwell door to make sure they weren’t seen. “Well, it’s Rupert isn’t it. And Nate. They can’t win, we’ve got to complete the job,” Keeley sighed, tears welling up in her eyes. “We?” Roy questioned and she rolled her eyes with an exaggerated exhale. “I mean we’re both here. There’s no way the others aren’t as well. Casing the joint,” she smiled tearily.

[whiskeyswifty]

Honestly I’m kinda mad about the directors on directors thing cuz I’ve always wanted her to do one for songwriting and god what a missed opportunity. On a separate note I don’t know what exactly I feel but it’s just so transparent this Hollywood you scratch my back I’ll scratch yours behaviour

that's something she can speak to! i always love when she talks about her songwriting process, and i'd love to see her and another songwriter discuss and compare methods and inspirations and processes. such a huge missed opportunity!

I can't tell you how to feel, of course, you're going to react however you do and that's fine! For me, it's not so much that, because favors fuel hollywood and that's always been true and always will be true. i don't really feel like it's a bad thing, just how the town works. however what she's doing isn't even that. content like "directors on directors" and panels at film festivals and all that are awards fodder, campaign content. the people in it are campaigning in trade publications for your consideration. it's not a bunch of randos, it's all the people who are 2023 oscar contenders or hopefuls. also not a bad thing, just how the whole machine works. everyone else is campaigning for the major races as they're major players but what she is campaigning for is live action short. her competitors are all small filmmakers, almost all of whom don't have anywhere near the resources as she does. the reason this category exists is to jumpstart the careers of those small filmmakers and give them an in to Hollywood. ESPECIALLY international filmmakers, last year's shortlist being a good example with nearly all selections being international films/directors. it's one of the few merit based (ish) ways into an industry otherwise run entirely by favors and she's taking advantage of her position. she KNOWS she has more resources financially and power and influence to easily squash her competition, it's why she chose this route. she's been vying for an oscar in original song for a decade almost. she's failed so many times, so she abandoned that route for a route she could easily dominate because it's filled with non-influential people she can step on. you'll never see anyone from the shorts categories in the campaign material for the major awards for that reason!! they can't AFFORD it, and even if netflix or some streamer picks them up, it's a small campaign, and the director is never featured. the work is supposed to speak for itself on merit and talent. and even if a short features a famous person, that celeb got involved to elevate the FILMMAKER (see riz ahmed from last year) and is using their power to help that small filmmaker get their chance. her making it about The Taylor Swift and inserting herself and leveraging her fame is to essentially.... buy an award for herself. or at least attempt to. if her project was good enough to compete on talent alone, she would submit it to a festival like everyone else and it would have to win a prize at that festival to qualify for the shortlist like everyone else. but she didn't. she paid for exactly the minimum theatrical run required to qualify and get around the festival requirement (which takes quite a bit of coordination in advance with the theaters so this was her plan the whole time). she's requesting to be in oscar campaign content (was not invited because shorts competitors are never invited so.... is requesting to be involved... which lol). she's leveraging resources she KNOWS the other competitors don't have, again money, power, and fame, because again they're small and up and coming filmmakers, to get ahead of them and manipulate the field and it's gross!!

it's all for the oscar. that's all she wants. and she can fight for an oscar in original song or score or acting even if she wants, but she chose to divert her efforts to this category because of how easy it would be for her to be a top dog with her money, power, and influence. and she's stealing the spotlight away from someone who has worked so hard for their whole life for this moment, has never had a chance until now, and could be the next wildly talented filmmaker for a vanity award she doesn't deserve. she doesn't NEED a live action short oscar to get her feature greenlit even if that was her goal. she can get funding right now because she's a huge player in the industry and people will run to see her work, musical or otherwise, and if she doesn't get funding she can also FUND IT HERSELF. she's a millionaire taking essentially a scholarship away from someone who needs it, if you think of it that way. i feel like i've said this 10 times already so i'm sorry for yammering on about the same shit but i'm heated and protective of the few things in this industry that are genuinely fair(ish) and net good, since those are so hard to come by. and the martin mcdonagh thing really broke me and my brain today.

TLDR she's trying to buy an oscar to egot and i can't wait until this is over so she can Tony-chase and go be musical theater nerds' problem and not mine anymore.

[modernmisadventures]

Chapter 18: Cookies and Company

“Knock knock.”

The sudden voice nearly caused Jess to jump out of her skin, yet a single glance back towards the door - or, rather, where the door had been - was enough to settle her nerves almost instantly.

“Varrus?” She tilted her head as the Elezen strode inside the disaster of a bar - seeing it in broad daylight had certainly illuminated the damage. Nearly every glass and bottle had been intentionally shattered, furniture and tables snapped in two as though they were little more than twigs, the floor sticky with a concoction of every cocktail imaginable.

“Hey,” he greeted softly, striding up to the counter; she watched as his eyes scanned her skin, his brows furrowing, a scowl darkening his handsome features. “Cir told me what happened, but, gods, I didn’t think it was this bad. Are you sure you’re ok?”

“I look that bad, huh?” She gave a soft chuckle, though her humor seemed to do little to improve his mood.

“Honestly? Yeah, you do.”

Not that she could disagree - she’d examined herself further after she’d awoken at Thancred’s that morning, and even she couldn’t help but grimace at what met her in the mirror.

“Hey, if you think this is bad, you should see the other guy. Or the other guy. Or the other guy.”

Again, her humor fell flat. The Elezen placed the basket he’d been carrying on the countertop, his jaw tightening. “Oh, I hope I do.”

“Varrus,” Jess warned, “don’t do anything stupid.”

With a sigh, he shook his head. “Nevermind that. What are you doing here so soon?”

“Working,” she snorted. “The better question is, what are you doing here?”

“I thought I’d come by to check on you, but I didn’t know it would look like… this.” He motioned vaguely around the disaster of a room. “Shouldn’t you be resting? The bar won’t be open for a few days at minimum.”

“Maybe,” she sighed, “but someone’s gotta clean up around here. And if the bar isn’t open, I’m not getting paid.”

“Are you sure it’s safe?”

“No,” she huffed begrudgingly. “But it would be a lot safer with a big, strong Elezen watching my back.”

To that, at least, his scowl finally disappeared, replaced by a soft grin as he reached for the basket.

“Here. I made these for you.”

“For me?” Curiously, she peered inside, finding a bundle of cookies - chocolate chip, if she had to guess. “Oh, Varrus, you shouldn’t have!”

With a grin, she reached in and grasped one, taking a bite. Not bad… though, judging by the browning on the edges, he’d softened his butter a little too aggressively, but the taste was good - and the thought made it all the sweeter.

She glanced up to find him watching her, a look of trepidation on his face.

“So?” he asked. “Are they… ok?”

“They’re wonderful, thank you so much.”

At that, he let out a sigh of relief, much to her amusement.

“Good. You have no idea how many failed batches that took; I hope Cip and Cir like botched cookies, because our kitchen is full of them now.”

“Cip too, huh?” Jess raised an eyebrow, an amused smirk upon her face. “Sounds like she and her man reconciled.”

“That’s a word for it,” Varrus huffed - and she could only imagine the sounds and chaos he must have found himself living in. “She’s over almost daily - it’s practically like having another roommate. At least Cir had the bedrooms soundproofed.”

Jess snorted - she could only imagine why.

“Kal’istae even stayed over last night,” Varrus added, much to her surprise, “though she left early this morning, back to work or whatnot.”

Right. Work. With a nod, Jess picked up her broom, resuming her attempts to clean the glass, that she might be able to scrub the floor - only to grin Varrus reached for the dust pan, kneeling to help her sweep away the clutter.

“You don’t have to do that,” she offered, yet he shook his head.

“It’s the least I can do - on some level, I feel like this is my fault.”

“Your fault?” She tilted her head, to which he nodded with a sigh.

“Cir told me the only thing they stole was your computer. If I hadn’t given it to you, maybe they wouldn’t have broken in…”

“Varrus, don’t be silly,” she huffed. “It was simply the quickest worthwhile thing they could grab - they probably would have gone for the till, too, had I not startled them.”

He opened his mouth to speak, yet before he could, she leaned down and pressed a finger to his lips. “But, I wouldn’t object to the help.”

At that, he smiled with a nod, dumping the full dust tray before glancing around the room with a huff. “So, what was your computer doing here, anyway?”

Jess bit her lip, glancing down at the floor before answering, “I… I live here. In the cellar. I know, I know, it’s… not exactly luxury, but I can’t really afford anything else.”

“Gods, I had no idea… And you’re safe now? Staying with Thancred, I think Cir said?”

Slowly, she nodded. “For the time being, anyway - at least until we can get this place serviceable again.” Not that she wanted to return - no, every small sound, every moving shadow made her jump, the events of the night before flashing into her mind. But what other choice did she have? She couldn’t exactly stay with Thancred - she felt as though she was already putting him out enough as it was, especially at the start of a brand new relationship. No, she’d only get in his way, no matter how much he insisted she wouldn’t.

And there wasn’t anywhere else for her to go - she couldn’t afford a place of her own, as she’d said, which left her the only options of returning to the bar, or finding someone’s room to rent.

And she’d prefer the cold, dank cellar to living with a stranger, that was for certain.

“You can’t live here, Jess,” Varrus huffed in exasperation. “It’s not safe - or clean, for that matter. You… could always come live in my bathroom - or my closet, or-”

She silenced him with a bemused shake of her head. “Tempting, but I think I’ll figure something out… and if I don’t, I know where to find you.”

“If you’re sure…” His expression said he wasn’t convinced, but, all the same, he let it go. “Oh, before I forget - Cir thought to invite you, and the rest of the crew, to a pool party this weekend.”

“A pool party?” She tilted her head. “Where? Cip’s?”

“No, our condo.”

“You have a pool?”

He nodded. “On the roof. I guess I must have forgotten to mention it.”

At that, her mind came to a screeching halt. “You have a rooftop pool? On the twelfth floor?! You bet your ass I’m going to be there!” Her unease around his roommate be damned, she wanted to feel the freedom of swimming where she could practically touch the sky.

“I’d rather bet yours,” came his reply, only to earn him a playful shove as she bumped him with her shoulder.

“Ha, ha, very funny. Now are you going to help me clean or not?”

[theoddcatlady]

Nearly lost my temper at work yesterday

For a bit of background, I work at an insurance company. I’m not exactly changing the world, but it pays well and it’s usually pretty chill. Except for yesterday, which I just really need to rant about. It was a bunch of little things that stacked up to my… almost explosion.

The water cooler was dripping nonstop. Citrix servers had gone down and that was the main program I use for work. I had a pounding headache from the bright lights in the office and my skin was all dried out from the artificial air. And for fuck’s sake, Barbara would just not leave me alone.

I’m not a people person. I can answer the phone and be amicable enough, but I’ve never been like BFF’s with my coworkers at… any of my jobs. Most of my coworkers get I’m here to do my job and get paid. Barbara though, good god. She just doesn’t get the hint. And I can’t exactly mouth off to her because she’s been with the company for like two decades so if she complains I’m the one in trouble… not like she’s done work for the last five years, but I digress.

“So is this your boyfriend, Ellie?”

I chewed the inside of my cheek as Barbara plucked one of the pictures in my cubicle up, cooing and aww’ing. I hated being called Ellie. “He’s so cute!”

“Andrew is my brother, actually. I’m not seeing anyone at the moment.” One of the only other people I can tolerate in this world. I grabbed the picture and not so gently snatched it back, setting it down. The vein in my forehead probably popped out another good inch as I saw that Barbara had left a greasy thumbprint on the glass. I’d need to clean it when she was gone.

“Oh!” Barbara cocked her head to the side. “You don’t look alike!”

“I’m adopted.” Desperately I stared at my computer, willing Citrix to get its shit together so I could tell Barbara I was busy working. I was not going to be that lucky.

“You know, I have a son about your age.” Barbara started fiddling with the other things in my space, my notepad, the pens. “He just broke up with his girlfriend, and I was wondering, I bet the two of you would love to have coffee together…”

“I’m sorta preoccupied with other things at the moment than dating. And I hate coffee. I’m more of a tea person.” Jesus Christ, I was at the point where I was begging the clock to speed up. Even with the systems down, I still wasn’t allowed to leave until four. Just in case they came back on, even though they never had in the past. I wouldn’t mind getting paid to sit on my ass and do nothing if fucking Barbara would leave me alone.

“At your age?”

Oh, here we go. I rolled my eyes as Barbara tutted her tongue at me. “You need to get on that, honey, otherwise you’re going to be unmarried at thirty! After that it’s all downhill, not to mention how this could effect your future children- is something wrong with your arm?”

Shit. I hid my hand under my desk. “No!” I spared a glance and almost starting cussing. Of all times to start shedding, this was not a good time. “Bathroom emergency, move it!”

I shoved past Barbara, accidentally pushing her to the ground in my haste. I heard her snap after me but I didn’t care. I scooted into the bathroom and slammed the door behind me.

I held my hand in front of me to see more skin start to flake off, revealing the putrid muscle and flesh underneath. Fuck me. Today had to be that bad, huh?

My brother used to call it my ‘zombie mode’ to make me grumpy, but it’s not really like that. I keep my sanity, but I just start rotting and falling apart at the seams. It’s been like this since I was a kid, though I do tend to rot quicker when I’m having a shitty day, so Barbara can get fucked.

There’s really only one way to speed up the process so my skin grows back normal and healthy, and it sucks.

I sent Andrew a text, telling him to come pick me up as soon as he could and to bring my large coat. He knew what I meant. With a sigh, I double checked the lock before I pulled my shirt off, bra following onto the floor. Where the underwire was pressing against me the skin was already starting to come off. I gritted my teeth, grabbed on, and yanked.

It doesn’t hurt, not when my skin’s already dead. Sometimes a bit of the live skin comes with it and oh that hurts like tearing a hangnail, but it’s hardly lethal.

Pus and blood spattered into the sink as I ripped more and more of my skin away, both lumps I once called breasts slapped on the ground with a wet sound. I could see tumorous, bulbous growths starting to form in the fat. With most of the skin on my torso gone, I moved onto my arm. I groaned with relief as I finally scratched away at the sore, ripping away more skin and flesh.

I had skinned my entire upper body and was finally starting to feel relief when I heard a timid knock at the door.

“Sweetie? Ellie? Are you okay?”

Barbara’s voice made my blood boil, but right now she was exactly what I needed. I cleared my throat before approaching the door. “Sorry, Barb, I… I threw up. Everywhere. On my clothes, on the sink. It looks like a horror film in here. I called my brother to come get me, but could you please bring me stuff to clean up? I am not leaving this for Willis to clean up tonight, he’ll probably quit.”

“Oh, of course, sweetie! Don’t worry about work, I’ll handle it.”

She even was nice enough to cover her eyes as she handed me the cleaning supplies through the crack in the door. I scrubbed that floor and counter spotless, filling a garbage bag with bloody paper towels and gore so that no one would assume I butchered someone in the bathroom.

My brother gave me my trench coat when he came to pick me up and acted like he was helping me out of the building as he escorted me, in reality he was making sure I wasn’t bleeding over everything.

Now I’m home, enjoying a few seasons of Friends as I heal up. Andrew is a coroner and if I didn’t have him, I probably would’ve lost my mind and eaten Barbara on a bad day years ago. Whenever I’m done ‘shedding’, he brings me home a few human body parts so I can eat. I usually add them to whatever junk I’m eating, but Barbara was nice enough to bring me some chicken noodle soup. Now it’s chicken noodle soup plus a kidney, but hey, what can you do.

Whoa, feels good to get my shitty yesterday off my chest. Thank god it’s Friday.

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

Pedantic, chapter one - a Malevolent AU

Arthur Lester is the best IT architect in the world, and the reason Carcosa, Inc. has its fingers in every pie. Government, medical, everyone in the world uses its systems.

Arthur is also going blind, with a rare genetic condition that can’t be fixed.

The looming depression is bad. He can’t imagine a life where he can’t create anymore. Arthur nearly gives up… until a deeply annoying cybersecurity programmer prods him into trying something new.

Great, right? Now, if only this John Doe weren’t clearly hiding something so wild that not even PI Parker Yang can dig it out…

Chapter One: Time for a bet.

AO3

----------

Arthur couldn’t see his view.

He knew it was good. He could still see when picking out the penthouse three years ago. He also knew it was a complete waste for him to hang on to this view now when he couldn’t see it, but he didn’t give a fuck. It felt like revenge against whatever force saw fit to do this to him, by depriving some other bastard of a view like this.

I’m telling you, it isn’t compliant, the robotic voice in his head said, synthesizing that fucking American’s words in the least emotional manner possible.

Arthur had never heard John’s actual voice, but was certain it wasn’t emotionless. “It does. I checked it against CIC standards, and YTM, and even the elusive Carney and Dobbs scale. You’re wrong.”

No, you are, argued the distant engineer.

Arthur didn’t have time for this. “Listen, Mister Doe, it is two o’clock in the morning here. I know damn well what I sent you works. So the problem is on your end, and I expect you to figure it out. ”

Silence. A long moment of silence.

Arthur knew precisely two things about John Doe. One, he was some sort of security whiz, capable of sniffing out backdoors and potential risks before even the pro hackers did, and two, John Doe absolutely hated his guts.

It was personal. Had to be. He never agreed to anything, always dragged out every damned conversation. Damned pedantic son of a bitch.

Finally, an answer: I think you need to check your code.

Check his code! Arthur did not need to check his code. “Excuse me?”

Check your code.

“No. It is two o’clock in the morning here, Doe.”

It is noon here, Lester. I have four hours to get this implemented. If you don’t fix your fucking code, I will.

And there we go. Pointless threats. Inappropriate language.

The sucky thing was, while normally altering code like this without approval would be enough to get someone fired, John Doe could get away with it.

Doe had come out of nowhere; Arthur had never heard of him, and he’d made no waves, but boom, old Hastur had promoted him to chief of cybersecurity for the whole company, and evidently paid him enough to live comfortably in the Upper East Side, Manhattan.

And Arthur had to admit: Doe was some kind of golden boy. He knew his stuff. It may feel like he sprang fully-formed from Hastur’s head, but he knew cybersecurity. It was like he had a fucking pipeline to the bad guys, the way he was able to spot exploits before anyone else could grab hold.

What Doe didn’t know was art. Or beauty. Or utility. Or any of the things Arthur’s entire life had revolved around since he was twelve and used Python to design his first Linux GUI.

Arthur sighed. He turned away from his glass walls and wraparound balcony, from the view of Melbourne at night which he could not see, and made his way to his computer.

His monitor—enormous, because all the text had to be, as well—booted up, and he sighed as he entered the usual frustrating and painful balance of trying to focus, squinting, dealing with the pain of the monitor’s brightness (without which he couldn’t see the damn screen) and adjusting the size of the text until he could handle it and read through what he’d written.

Gods, this was a gorgeous design. Lullabye, he called it, because it was designed to help after a DDOS attack, to put all relevant and endangered systems right to sleep, cutting off access, stopping whatever invasion was going on right in its tracks.

It was flawless. It was efficient. It was beautiful. It was a hell of a major project to go out on.

He could not spot whatever put Doe in a tizzy. Fuck.

The easy solution would be to give Doe permission to patch it, requiring detailed notes of what changes he made.

The medium-hard solution would be to give him permission to patch it, but live, with Arthur sharing his screen, so Doe couldn’t do anything unmonitored (and maybe Arthur could finally understand how Doe thought).

The dangerous solution was to refuse him, foment more conflict for no pay out, and watch Doe have his way, anyway.

Damn it. But it’s perfect, he thought, unable to keep from whining a little.

Arthur sighed. Carcosa had been good to him. Hastur had rewarded his artistry over and over. The ungrateful thing would be not to trust Doe. “Fine,” Arthur muttered. “Cassilda, email John Doe.”

Emailing, she replied through the implants in his head, voice as musical as he designed her to be, damn near singing.

“Permission granted to make changes to the code as long as we do a screenshare and all changes are approved by me. Send.”

Silence for a moment.

About fucking time, Lester. Here’s my number. Text is fucking faster.

This guy knew his stuff, but he did not know how to be fucking appropriate in a fucking business setting. “Is he serious?” Arthur said. Maybe he did spring fully-formed from Hastur’s head, he snorted. Being a year old would explain it all. “Reply: If you’re trying to cover your ass legally, that won’t work with a company phone.” It was both sarcasm and a warning. Also, logic. Touché!

Arthur’s smugness lasted all of the 60 seconds it took for Doe to receive and reply: I have my own personal phone and so do you. Don’t be a dick. Let’s get this done.

How did… What? Why did Doe know that? “I’m not a dick,” Arthur muttered, trying to decide if this was a great big personal information violation, or…

Well, it was, but did it really matter? He could change the number. Block Doe. Whatever he wanted to do here. And it would be quicker. The Hyades global network was faster than any email because Arthur had helped design it. (Hastur had given him an incredible bonus that year.) “Cassilda, send Doe my phone number.” Okay, why had he done that? Why? “Because I’m not a dick,” he answered himself. “I’m an idiot.”

The reply took literally as long as Doe needed to save the contact to his phone. Nice to meet you.

“We haven’t met yet, Doe,” said Arthur, replying through Cassilda.

Call me John. Now let’s fix this code.

“Damn you, there’s nothing to fix!”

An exclamation mark! A swear word! Looks like I finally got some emotion out of you.

Arthur gaped at nothing. “I will have you know that you get plenty of emotion from me. Primarily, frustration.”

Glad to know you’re not frigid. Okay, I’m sending the screenshare request now.

“Frigid? What the fuck… Wait, wait, give me a moment. Got it, got it. You prick.”

Better believe I am. Now, pay attention. Line 1004. Doe—John—read the code to him via text, because Cassilda would read it next.

Arthur paled. It had a typo.

He couldn’t see the typo. The font showed the difference between a lower-case l and a numeral 1, but he couldn’t see it.

He leaned in, face nearly to the monitor, peering. The serifs might as well have all been erased.

See it? Good. Next we’ll jump down to line 8524.

Arthur didn’t reply. He swallowed.

It was another typo, but this one… he didn’t need to know this was the big one. The typo on 1004 just rendered that bit of code inoperable; nothing would happen. But this one…

This one. Instead of a semi colon, it was a colon, which meant…

This is the big one, said John unnecessarily. Arthur didn’t reply. This one means this process keeps running, and the particular ping it creates to find the invading bug also leaves it open to malicious injection.

“I was right,” Arthur whispered, because he had been. He’d thought, deep down, this would be his last major project.

About what?

Arthur hadn’t meant to send that. He leaned back in his chair, reducing the familiar, beloved language on the screen to blurry dots and squiggles, and was surprised to find he was crying. He wiped his face, furious. “Nothing.”

Tell me. It could be relevant.

Fuck him. “It’s not relevant.”

It might be. We’re getting this fixed so you can go to bed and I can go get drunk. Come on, Lester.

He sighed. “Arthur. Just Arthur.”

All right, Just Arthur. What were you right about?

Arthur checked. Cassilda confirmed that “just” had been capitalized. Like receiving a knighthood, or something.

He laughed weakly. “Didn’t know you were funny, Doe.” A pause. “John.”

Only when it’s worth my while.

So… well, this moment was certainly worth his while. They had three hours left to implement this thing. “Just that this was my last big hurrah. That’s all. I knew. I knew it. Just didn’t want to know it, if you get what I mean.”

Why the hell had he said that?

Arthur sighed. There was no undo send with Hyades and the Carcosa phone line (Dancer—it had long put Apple out of business). It was better, Arthur believed and had argued, to have a record of communication, even when things were sent by accident. Better to have that record, legal and powerful, then try to handle the fallout of removed knowledge and the potential for deceit.

It doesn’t have to be, fucking hell.

That made him laugh for some reason. “Right. Sure.”

It doesn’t. I’m guessing the coding doesn’t work so great with Cassilda for you?

No, it had not worked with Cassilda. Cassilda could read it all out (Line 147, from enum import Enum semicolon. Line 148, class Day(Enum) colon. Line 149, all capitalized letters, MONDAY space equal sign space the numeral 1).

Yeah, he couldn’t do that. It was like trying to listen to an audiobook one godsdamned letter at a time. “It doesn’t work for what I do.”

You just need someone who knows how you think who can put your stuff into code, then. You’re good at this, Arthur.

“I’m going blind, John.” Which of course he knew. Everyone knew. Fucking TIME magazine knew.

So?

“Excuse me?”

You a betting man?

“Oh, what the hell are you saying?” Arthur muttered. “Don’t send that!”

It’s already sent, Arthur. My apologies.

He sighed. “No, it’s fine. Continue to send automatically unless instructed not to. I guess we’re doing this.”

John was scrolling on his end, highlighting bits of code and fixing them. It wasn’t a lot. The whole thing was nearly 100 million lines of code, and Arthur had made a total of four mistakes. That wasn’t bad.

Except that when Arthur could see, he never made any.

The code scrolled. Too fast; he didn’t have time to focus on what John was doing (and doing quickly, with an ease that spoke of artistry the idiot himself did not understand). The next generation, folks, picking up the slack.

One wild, intrusive thought of throwing himself off his expensive balcony later, Arthur shook it off. “What bet?”

Let’s design something together.

Oh, this could go so badly. “What?”

Don’t know yet, but here’s the catch.

“Of course there’s a catch.”

Heh, heh, heh.

What a silly text to send. Arthur’s lips quirked. “Out with it, you dork.”

You share your vision with me, and I design it. Your specs. I won’t interfere with your idea of beauty or whatever you call it. You stick to the parts you love—making it pretty, and how the user accesses it. I’ll make sure it works.

Arthur swallowed. He’d never successfully designed with anybody. It always fell apart. “I don’t know.”

Let’s make it big. We won’t announce it. If it falls apart and I lose the bet, I’ll do whatever you want. Quit. Shave my head. Whatever.

Arthur laughed. “Shave your head?”

But if I win—

Arthur waited. He frowned. “Did you fall on your overlarge head and die?”

Shut up. If I win, you have to keep creating shit, and I get to be smug at you over coffee.

Eh? “That’s—” He didn’t know what to say. “What kind of a stupid bet is that?”

Beneficial to us both. You think my best work isn’t done on your coattails? It is. My star rises and falls with yours. I need you, and for once, you need me, too.

That was too much, and Arthur walked away from the desk. He had to pace.

This shouldn’t be personal, but it was. “How the hell was that both flattering and infuriating at the same… need… what in fuck’s name…”

Of course, Casdilda sent that.

By all means, keep going. This is funny as fuck.

“Fuck you.” Arthur sat back down. He was shaken. He felt like he was a million years old.

It’s cleaned up. Do you want to test it?

“No, it’s ready to go live. I… I trust you.” Because he had to, at least in this. But this bet… insane. Insulting. Ingratiating? What the hell? How was he supposed to take this? It was the weirdest thing he’d ever been offered.

And it’s implemented. Congratulations. Updates are going out now. Got any champagne?

“It’s three in the morning. What I have is bed. We’ll talk tomorrow. Goodnight, Doe.”

It’s John. Dick.

Arthur decided not to answer out of pure pettiness, and was still churning the entire conversation in his head when he fell asleep.

------

CHAPTER TWO

Notes:

This was posted on the road and written on my phone, so I beg your patience as I correct inevitable coding errors typos. Also, the tech stuff is made up. Just pretend it’s an alternative future. We’re all here for John and Arthur, anyway.

[itsdelilah123]

WINE STAINS

Nigel Colbie x Alex Forbes one-shot

prologue: Alex has been coming home later and later from his shifts at the bar and Nigel isn’t sure what to think, so one day he waits late into the morning for Alex to ask him about his “late shifts” at work.

🍷

(Side eye)

Alex’s pov:

I’m wiping down the countertop of the bar I work at thinking about how ready I am to get home. I’ve been taking overtime shifts to save up extra cash for the past 3 months for me and Nigel’s 3rd anniversary. I’m going to propose to him tomorrow morning, I got it all planned out. the ring I got him isn’t anything special but it’s enough (hopefully) I’ve also got a week-long trip to Rome Italy planned out, I know he always wanted to go there. I feel bad for always being at work but I’m praying to god that the proposal will make things better.

Third-person pov:

Alex finishes up cleaning with a slight smile on his face thinking about how Nigel was worth being sleep deprived and overworked. Alex gets paid a decent salary enough to pay for his and Nigel’s small apartment and everything they need, just not enough to get up and leave whenever they want. this has put a strain on their relationship but he knows they can get through it. Nigel will understand and get over it.

…

“ALRIGHT AMY IM HEADING OUT”

Alex yells to his coworker, Amy. She is one of the few people who he actually considers a friend, she’s even helped Alex plan out this whole proposal.

“OK DOLLOP HEAD” (Merlin reference😉)

Amy shouts back, Alex smiles after hearing her and nearly drops his car key trying to take them out of his pocket and unlock his car. he sighs and relaxes into the driver seat leaning his head back and trying to imagine Nigel’s reaction, yes they’ve been together for 3 years but he’s still scared of the possibility of Nigel saying no.

Alex shakes his body trying to push away those heart-aching thoughts and pulls off ready to go home.

Nigel’s pov:

For the past three months, Alex has been working “overtime” and he’s never home. His work has consumed him. His whole routine is work, home, and sleep. I don’t ever see him awake anymore, When I do cross paths with him it is very rare, I’m either waking up and he’s sleeping or I’m waking up when he’s just come back home. But today I’ve decided to wait up for him. I’m tired of trying to think of different explanations. He doesn’t need to work overtime it’s not like we need the money, I’ve checked our bank balance a few times and they haven’t changed. what reason does he have if he’s not profiting from anything? I don’t even get to have an explanation for any of this. it feels like he’s ignoring me trying to avoid me even. Every time I ask him about it or bring it up (when I get the rare chance of running into him when he’s not snoring) he gets defensive or says “his boss just needed an extra hand on shift”.

Third-person pov:

it’s been 3 hours since Nigel has decided he was going to wait up for Alex, he sat on their couch book in his lap and a glass of dark red wine resting on the coffee table next to him, it was getting late and Nigel didn’t know if he could stay up for any longer. It was currently 2:10 am and he got off work at 7:00 pm. Nigel started biting on his lip wondering if he should just go to sleep? he has work in the morning. Nigel furrows his brows gripping the cushions of the couch his knuckles turning white, he doesn’t understand why Alex couldn’t at least be home the night before their anniversary. Nigel wanted to see him before he had to go in for work the next day. Nigel lets out a sigh looking around and getting more anxious as thoughts run through his head. His eyes ended up landing on his glass of wine, he grabs the glass and slowly puts the rim up to his lips, he takes a deep breath before completely chugging the glass down, and wine drips down the sides of Nigel’s mouth dripping onto his (Alex’s) white shirt leaving small wine stains down the front of the shirt. Nigel pours himself another after another glass🍷.

…

Nigel is onto his 4th cup of wine but stops when someone abruptly grabs his wrist. he didn’t hear anything because he was completely zoned out (and tipsy)so he was shocked when he felt someone grabbing into him. Nigel choked on the wine coughing as the glass was being taken from his hand.

“Nigel, what are you doing up so late?”

Nigel looks up to see Alex staring at him confused and concerned.

“waiting for you ofc-of course”

Nigel says looking back into Alex’s eyes.

Alex’s pov:

I pull into the parking lot of our apartment building, I quickly rush out of my car into the small building to not freeze my ass off. I walk up 2 flights of stairs (we live on the second floor) I pull my keychain out from my pocket and unlock the door not expecting Nigel to be up but I’m taken it back when I walk into the apartment and see the dim glow of the living room light. Nigel probably just forgot to shut it off before going to bed- well that’s what I thought before I walk into the living to see Nigel chugging down a glass of wine. The shirt he’s wearing is covered with red stains, he had a blanket loosely covering his midriff, his hair was messy framing his face perfectly and his cheeks were a bright red compared to his fair skin— he looked beautiful.

I rushed over to him and grab his wrist pulling the drink away from his mouth before he could finish the glass.

“Nigel, what are you doing up so late?”

I ask him generally confused, he is always asleep by now.

“Waiting for you ofc-of course.”

“for me?”

I question not quite understanding from the lack of sleep. He looks away for a second but I grab his chin slowly pulling his head to face me.

“you stood up all this time waiting for me—why?” This idiot…

Third-person pov:

Nigel looks into Alex’s eyes and says “because you’re never here.” His eyes started to tear up (the alcohol making him more emotional).

“god Nigel…don’t cry, I’m sorry,” Alex whispers taking his thumb wiping away the stray tear that left Nigel’s eye, in this moment Alex takes in the boy in front of him studying his details closely. His eyes travel from his pitch black hair to his icy blue eyes onto his red chapped lips. Alex didn’t know what to do he’s never seen Nigel act this way before.

“Why are you always at work? Your keeping secrets…we agreed to always tell each other the truth!” Nigel says pushing away Alex’s hand wiping away his tears and looking back at Alex with a cold harsh stare. “Tell me…Alex, why? Did I do something wrong is it me…is it me Alex?” Nigel begs letting out a choked sob, his breathing quickened and his face went from relaxed to distressed. Alex's heart breaks in that moment. He never realized how much stress he’s put Nigel through, how could he let Nigel ever think that he did something that would make Alex want to ignore him?

“no. Nigel god no you didn’t do anything. Im so sorry…” Alex says almost whispering. “Let’s go to bed please I’ll explain to you in the morning...I’m exhausted and I’m sure you are too.”

Nigel finally looks into Alex’s sorrowful eyes and hesitantly agrees. Alex smiles softly and put his hands on Nigel’s face gently rubbing small circles into his cheeks with his thumbs. Alex sighs and leans down and places a soft kiss on Nigel’s lips, resting his head on Nigel’s shoulder raping his arms around his waist.

“let’s go to sleep I’ll explain everything in the morning.” Patting his side Alex slides his hands underneath Nigel’s thighs lifting him.

“Ok” Nigel whispers while he wraps his arms around Alex resting his head on his shoulder his eyes growing heavier by the second. Alex makes his way to their shared bedroom shutting off the living room light on the way. Alex places Nigel on the bed telling Nigel to “wait he will be back in a second” going to the closet changing from his outside clothes to a pair of sweatpants, he then goes back over to Nigel changing his stained shirt and replacing it with a clean one.

Alex lays down bringing Nigel close to himself and placing soft kisses on his face and neck before they finally went to sleep. 😍(finally) 

 

(Smoking hot lady 😍)

THE NEXT MORNING

Alex pov:

I woke up to the smell of coffee, I stretch and open my eyes to see Nigel gone from the bed. I throw the blanket off of myself and walk out into the small hallway and hear my name being said. “Alex?”

I blink a couple of times and see Nigel coming up to me with a mug in his hands. I smile walking over to him raping my arms around him in a bear hug. “Good morning handsome..” I say placing a kiss on his neck.

“happy anniversary,” I tell him pulling away from my hug and looking into his eyes. “I’m sorry for keeping secrets. I’m sorry for putting you under so much stress—“ I was cut off by Nigel giving me a slow and gentle kiss, he pulled away and said, “you're a dick, and a liar.” I smile and give him an Eskimo kiss. “Let me get your gift.” I peck his lips and walk back into our room pulling out a small black wooden box.

Nigel’s pov:

I woke up by the sun hitting my face I look at Alex peacefully sleeping next to me, I can’t entirely recall what happened yesterday but I do remember most of it. I sigh and get up walking into the living room looking at the mess I left.

I cleaned up the bottle of wine throwing it away while folding and putting the pillows and blankets back into their original spots. I stretched and walk back into the kitchen making myself a cup of coffee. I stood in the kitchen with my thoughts running freely inside my mind until I hear the old wooden floorboards of our apartment creek.

“Alex?” I say walking into our living room to see him standing in the middle of the hallway with his head hanging low. Once he heard me call out to him he lifts his head smiling while coming over to me, he raps me into a hug saying “good morning handsome..” and placing a kiss onto my neck. I shiver at the feeling of his lips on me.

I’m caught off guard when he says “happy anniversary.” He pulls away from our hug and looks into my eyes. Before I can say anything in return he follows up by saying “I’m sorry for keeping secrets. I’m sorry for putting you under so much stress—“ before he can finish his apology I kiss him It was simple and sweet.

“you’re a dick, and a liar,” I say after pulling away from the kiss. He smiles giving me an Eskimo kiss. “Let me get your gift.” He tells me pecking my lips before rushing off into our room.

third person pov:

Alex walks out of their room with a small black wooden box in his hands and visibly stressed.

“Nigel I know I haven’t been the best to you over the past few months but I hope this makes up for it because if it doesn’t all the time I’ve spent working would just be wasted and I don’t know if— let me just get straight to the point…Nigel I know I haven’t been the best I love you more than anything and I would love to be able to spend the rest of my life with you…” Alex gets down on one knee opening the box and finally ask the question he’s been wanting to ask for the longest.

“Will you marry me?”

Nigel stands there frozen. He’s lost for words he never thought Alex would propose. Meanwhile Alex is getting more and more nervous because Nigel still hasn’t said anything.

“Nigel..?” Alex questioned voice shaking. So many thoughts were running throughout his head, god this was a mistake he doesn’t want to marry your dumb ass, why would he u basically ignored him for 3 months. Alex tells himself breathing heavier and heavier by the second growing more stressed.

Nigel’s eyes start to water a little bit and he whispers “of course”

“What?” Alex questions desperate to know Nigel’s answer.

“I said of course.”

Alex sighs and stands up his whole body relaxing, he walks over to Nigel looking into his eyes and down at his hand before grabbing the other boy's hand and placing the ring onto it the latter doing the same. big smiles placed on their faces.

Alex places his forehead onto Nigel’s putting his arms around Nigel’s body hugging his now fiancé. Nigel does the same and says.

“happy anniversary”

they’re finally united as one guys

(y’all I half-assed the ending but tell me if u want a part.2 idk if I will make one but if this does ok I might. Sorry if this is bad as well I have written anything in a hot minute. And there are probably a lot of spelling errors) 

[blokkedbonanza]

Eden | Voicelines

Introduction

Hello - Welcome to the Angel’s Share. What would you like? Oh? Not a drinker? Not to worry, there’s food options as well if you need to get your fill, just browse the menu and call me over when you’re ready. …Not here to eat either? My name? Oh, I’m Eden. What service do you need from me? …I see. I’ll be off in a bit then, I’ll accompany you shortly. 

Idles

Chat: Supplies - Charles said that the next shipment should arrive about evening, I hope he can sort that out while I’m gone…

Chat: Adventuring - It’s been a while since I last left the city walls like this; let’s hope I still know my stuff. 

Chat: Care - I think it’d be nice to just admire the view for a bit like this, wouldn’t you agree?

Weather

When It Rains: Cover - Do you need cover? Oh, don’t worry about me, I can just blow it off when the rain lets up. 

When It Rains: Let Up - Sigh, how long will this rain last? It’s a bit hard for me to hold my barrier up for too long… 

After the Rain - Brrr! Hah, sorry, don’t mean to shake like a wet dog. This is easier than having to lug around an umbrella everywhere. 

When It Snows - Ice is beautiful, yet delicate. It’s hard to preserve when dawn finally arrives… Sorry, where to next? 

When the Sun Is Out - …Sorry, you were saying? The sun is so warm I nearly fell asleep, I should stop taking night shifts…

When the Wind Is Blowing - I hope the flowers at Windrise are growing well, I should stop by there soon.

Timed Greetings

Good Morning - Good morning, you’re here at the tavern early. What’ll it be on the menu today? Apple cider, or adventure? 

Good Afternoon - Let’s eat at Good Hunter, my treat. Hm? Oh, don’t worry about paying me back, Master Diluc pays me plenty enough. Come on, take your pick.

Good Evening - Sigh, it’s usually around this hour where customers start pouring in… Thank you for pulling me out of my shift today, the drunkards last night were more than I could handle, haha!

Good Night - You're free to take my room above if you’d like. It’s no problem, I usually sleep under the bar anyway. It’s a lot comfier than you’d think, haha. 

About Eden

About Eden: Intel - Although working at the Angel’s Share is nice, I tend to hear things through the grapevine that I don’t know what to do with. I understand a tavern is where exchanges occur, but I wish I didn’t have to listen to it all. Sigh…

About Eden: The Guild - I’m very grateful for what Master Diluc has done for me, but I do wish I had a bit more free time to take up commissions at the Adventurer’s Guild. It’s a bit redundant for me to do so since I get paid an ample amount, but I do miss adventuring Mondstadt after what happened…

About Us: Anemo - It’s incredible how you can wield the powers of the wind without a vision. If we’re both free, would you like to show me a few skills? I’d like to hone my abilities a bit more.

About Us: Stormterror - So Master Diluc wasn’t kidding, you really did satiate the dragon. He was under the influence of the abyss order? …I see. The winds disperse with time, and the feelings I harbor towards the East of the Four Winds will fade with it. Soon I’ll find it in my heart to forgive him for what happened. 

About the Vision: Sharp Winds - Sometimes when the world grows quiet and all to be heard is the breeze, I still see that day and hear those cries… This gift from the Gods serves as a reminder of my failure.

About the Vision: Gentle Gale - I have to grow stronger, for his sake. Even though I couldn’t use it back then to save him, I’ll make sure to protect those who are dear to me now, including you. 

Something to Share/Interesting Things

Something to Share - It’s so frustrating when a patron at the tavern points out the windwheel aster spinning in my hair. Don’t people know that it’s supposed to do that? …Why is it spinning rapidly now? That’s- That’s nothing, don’t mind it. 

Interesting Things - I’m sorry for when my barrier comes out randomly, I can’t exactly control that nature. I don’t know why it happens, I guess even the winds can’t be commanded by an Anemo user… Definitely no other reason…

About Others

About Diluc: Caretaker - Master Diluc took me in after the incident in Stormterror’s Lair. He’s actually quite kind when you get to know him, I suppose he just has a soft spot for younger people. 

About Diluc: Dusk - I don’t usually spend my nights at the Dawn Winery, but whenever I do I can’t seem to find Master Diluc. Ms. Adelinde says he’s usually busy, but what sort of matters does he have to settle at such a late hour? I guess it’s none of my business.

About Venti - That bard always performs at the tavern late at night, and it’s hard for me to get much sleep. He’s much more tolerable in the daytime, yet even then you’ll find that he’s already halfway through a bottle of dandelion wine. …Where did he get that bottle anyway? 

About Lisa: Visits - She always lets me stay late at the library whenever I visit to find a book to sit with. Though I’m usually busy at work, she always welcomes me with the book I was last reading already at her desk.  

 About Lisa: Teachings - Ms. Lisa is the one who taught me how to wield my vision, actually. Though Electro doesn’t exactly translate that well to Anemo, she taught me the basics of how to channel the element. She also gave me a book on how wind compression works, hopefully my bullets can get stronger as I learn.

About Bennett: Fondness - Bennett? He’s a very sweet guy. He’s very thoughtful and visits me at the tavern when I’m on my shift sometimes, and always asks me to join him on his adventures … Hm? My windwheel aster? How’d you know- Oh, it’s spinning again. Haha, sorry…

About Bennett: Windwheels - Bennett actually gave me this windwheel in my hair. A condolence gift, after the incident. It hasn’t wilted since. I do hope he… nevermind, it’s not important. 

About Kaeya - Around the Dawn Winery mansion you’ll find Sir Kaeya’s name in a few small places. I’m not sure why I’ve never seen him around the vineyard before if his name is inside the mansion walls, but I suppose that isn’t of my concern either. 

About Jean - The Acting Grandmaster is still wary of my firearm, but for the right reason. Anemo is a tricky element to wield, so I understand why she’s so apprehensive about me using my firearm to amplify that. She has mentioned taking up a sword before… 

About Fischl - Fischl is a lot of fun to speak to. I don’t exactly understand what she says most of the time, but it’s a bit similar to how Master Diluc talks, so I can decipher quite a bit of it. Though I’m not sure where she heard the title “Princess of Mondstadt” from, who calls me that anyway? 

About Razor - Oh, Razor! Him and I get along well, we- well, I used to explore Wolvendom and he would accompany me, and the spirits like him a lot, haha. I visit him from time to time to share my supplies if he needs, and just to talk to him every once in a while. I also see him when Ms. Lisa teaches the both of us how to use our visions.

About Klee - She’s a very bright child, though I wish that she’d be a bit more careful with her explosives. My wind barrier can only do so much, and even then it makes the fire even bigger. I hope Ms. Lisa won’t be too upset with us…

About Xingqiu - Are you visiting Liyue anytime soon? Let me accompany you! I have a friend I visit to chat about the books we’ve read and I have to tell him about what just happened in this one! He’s never gonna believe the main character just sacrificed herself for her partner like that, turning into a dragon?! Oh, what people will do for love!

More About Eden

More About Eden: I - Do you find it weird that I work at the tavern? Most people are usually a bit apprehensive when they stop by the bar for a drink, but it’s not like I’m drinking the alcohol as I serve it to them… Hm? The Cat’s Tail? Oh right, little Diona from Springvale. That’s true, though it doesn’t really make me stand out any less, that just makes the two of us oddballs, haha.

More About Eden: II - What do I do at the Angel’s Share? Well, other than serving the patrons, I usually restock whatever is needed behind the bar, as well as wipe down the tables and collect the pay. I usually take the night shift, since that’s when the bar is the most lively and fun, but it really does take a toll on my sleep schedule when Venti decides “another round on the house!” for the 4th time in the evening… 

More About Eden: III - H-huh? Bennett? What about him? …Sigh, I guess there’s no point in keeping it a secret, what with my windwheel giving it away. Please, don’t tell him, I like it better this way. I don’t… know if I’m ready to be so close to someone after all this time. 

More About Eden: IV - My friend was cold and stern, but was still kind to me and many others. I see a bit of him in you, traveler. Please, promise me you will remain diligent as you face your journey. I can’t always be present to protect you. 

More About Eden: V - Wherever the wind may take you, I will always hold you dear to my heart. The spirit of the Anemo God will guide you through your journey, but please know that there will always be a seat for you at the Angel’s Share, traveler. I’m always ready at a moment’s notice. 

Misc. 2

Eden’s Hobbies - It’s been quite a while since I’ve visited Ms. Lisa to read a good book. I’ve read nearly everything the library has to offer, minus the restricted area. Maybe I could take another trip to Liyue to get that one series I was looking for. 

Eden’s Troubles - The only troublesome thing about Mondstadt is how freely drunk everyone gets. It isn’t exactly my responsibility, but someone has to take care of the folks who are too drunk to leave the tavern. Don’t even get me started on that bard, goodness.

Favorite Food - Anything with meat is a good meal in my book. Sweet Madames, Mondstadt Grilled Fish, have you ever had Master Diluc’s specialty? You’d never think of him as the type to cook for others, but his food is to die for. Maybe one day I can convince him to cook for the two of us? 

Least Favorite Food - Onions are awful. Who likes onions? You cry when they’re cut and they burn your tongue when you bite into it. Who thought this stuff was meant for eating? 

Birthday - Happy birthday, traveler. Come by the tavern later today when you’re free! Anything you want, on the house, my treat. Though I don’t know if I’ll be able to give you any liquor… Hopefully Charles doesn’t mind. 

Feelings About Ascension

Feelings About Ascension: Intro - Hah, I haven’t felt this lively in quite some time. I could get used to this.

Feelings About Ascension: Building Up - Whoops! Sorry, traveler, trigger finger. My bullets don’t usually go that fast, hm… Maybe I am improving?

Feelings About Ascension: Climax - I hope this’ll be enough to protect everyone… No, keep going, it’ll never be enough until you see results, Eden.

Feelings About Ascension: Conclusion - Traveler, I truly am thankful to you. As the Honorary Knight, I was a bit apprehensive about meeting you, though that would be from Master Diluc’s bias. But you truly have been so much help for not just me, but everyone in Mondstadt. Don’t worry about where your journey takes you, I’ll be sure to take care of Mondstadt while you’re away. I’m capable, now that I’m strong enough. 

Action Dialogue

Elemental Skill: I - Hah!

Elemental Skill: II - Woo!

Elemental Skill: III - Get behind me.

Elemental Skill: IV - Away with you!

Elemental Skill: V - Disperse!

Elemental Burst: I - Rise forth from the gale!

Elemental Burst: II - Take back this fight!

Elemental Burst: III - Once more from the winds!

Elemental Burst: IV - Return from the breeze!

Sprint Start: I - Keep up! 

Deploying Glider: I - Fly away!

Opening Treasure Chest: I - Hah, look! Money!

Opening Treasure Chest: II - Hm, this looks like something from the Dawn Winery, haha!

Opening Treasure Chest: III - Woah, so many treasures! You can keep them all, hehe!

Low HP: I - Hah, not looking good.

Low HP: II - Keep going…!

Low HP: III - This won’t be how it ends!

Ally at Low HP: I - What did I say about getting behind me?!

Ally at Low HP: II - Sit back, I’m here.

Fallen: I - Carry me back home…

Fallen: II - Hey, old friend…

Fallen: III - Scattered by the winds…

Light Hit Taken: I - Ow, hey!

Heavy Hit Taken: I - This next round’s for you!

Teapot/Party Menu

Receiving a Gift: I - This is wonderful! Come, I can’t enjoy this all by myself! 

Receiving a Gift: II - Thank you, I’ll savor this.

Receiving a Gift: III - Uhm, it’s okay, Adelinde is preparing dinner tonight. 

Joining the Party: I - What’s on the menu today?

Joining the Party: II - Hah, fresh air!

Joining the Party: III - Just like old times, haha!

BONUS: Other characters' voicelines about Eden

Diluc - If you ever need refuge in Mondstadt, the Angel’s Share will always take you in. If you need shelter late at night, however, please be cautious when entering the tavern. Hm? Booby traps? No, Eden sleeps beneath the bar oftentimes, if you’re too loud you’ll wake her and she’ll hit her head.

Lisa - Hm? Our dear flower has finally decided to blossom before your eyes, I hear? Don’t underestimate her capability, Traveler, that young girl has a resilience that rivals her fa- ahem, her master’s. Just make sure she isn’t tiring herself out at the tavern, would you?

Venti - A new bartender at the Angel’s Share? Oh! You must mean Eden! Don’t be weary, Traveler, my poetic way with words will allow us to acquire whatever we please, because Eden is a sweetheart! …huh? She already told you to keep an eye on me? Hmph, seems like Diluc has already given her a warning… No matter! The wind always finds a way, does it not?

Kaeya - Eden? Oho, it seems you’ve finally come across the little bud in Mondstadt’s garden, haven’t you? She still has a long way to go to becoming a great bartender, but I think most of us can see that’s not the path she wishes for herself, don’t you agree?

Jean - Eden shows quite the potential for being a capable knight, her prowess in defending her comrades is something worth mentioning. Her… weapon of choice, on the other hand, makes me uneasy… I trust Master Diluc to ensure she knows how to work that thing.

Razor - When I hear bang, I know Eden is near. Bang scares Lupical, but Eden is nice, makes sure that Lupical are safe. I feel safe, too.

Fischl - Ah, the Princess of Mondstadt, heir to the throne of Dawn. As one of royal blood myself, it is no surprise that the Prinzessin der Verurteilung is in close ties with such prestige in this fallen world! Soon we shall both ascend into our rightful thrones and become as powerful as the threads of fate have rightfully claimed! Oz - Eden is a dear friend of mein Fräulein, and adoptive daughter of Sir Diluc of the Dawn Winery.

Bennett: Tales - That was an incredible adventure we just went on! Oh, I’m so excited to tell Eden all about it! Come, let’s head to the Angel’s Share right now!

Bennett: Red - Eden? Oh, man, she’s amazing. She’s so quick on her feet and she can manage the entire tavern by herself, she’s so nice too! And when she’s out on an adventure, she’s unstoppable! One time, she totally saved my butt from these monsters late at night, and she looked so pretty- pretty, uh, cool…! And, and then after that I… uhm, my face? Red? Haha, maybe I ate a poisonous berry while we were out, I should go get that checked up! See you!

Xingqiu - Though I only see her every so often, Eden is a delight to have as company. We share a common interest in novels, but our tastes tend to differ; her stories center around romance and discovery, whereas mine lean towards mystery and adventure. One thing we do share in common, however, is the aptitude for gossip. The things I’ve learned about people in Mondstadt I could write my own novel on…

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