#and go interact with real human beings
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Who is this sassy lost child?
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan wangji#a-yuan#A-Yuan knows how to to utilise his big wet eyes to get treats. What a little legend.#The crowd comments about LWJ being 'daddy' and WWX being 'the mother' are a little too 'fan-service bait' for me.#So I am personally reimagining it as another layer of 'misinterpretation of a more complex situation' commentary.#I like how the different styles of interacting with children WWX an LWJ exhibit say so much about their own childhoods.#We - human beings in the real world - take two lessons from how we were parented: What we valued and what we wish we had.#LWJ leaning into indulgence is him pushing back against his own childhood of asceticism. It's something he didn't have - so he gives it.#WWX on the other hand has been *so* defined by his drive to indulge. And here he is the restrictor!#It takes a bit more to see what's going on here. The factors are not singular.#but to keep it in theme with LWJ; I'd propose it is partly his way of establishing structure when he did not have it as a child.#Both approches are a way of saying 'I didn't have this and I wish I did.'#With LWJ it's pretty obvious why...but WWX? What is at your core? What is your regret towards a lack of restriction?#Or...What benefit do you think it gives this child to learn the harsh lessons of going without?#Did it make you strong when you were a child? Do you think it is just the nature of the world and we all must learn it?#How we interact with children is such a fascinating topic to delve into our psychology and neuroses.#In a more light hearted turn of topic:#WWX confirmed to be 'person taking the car to the drive through to order one black coffee for himself' on the triangle spectrum.#LWJ is saying 'we have food at home' as he is opening his wallet ready to order for everyone.#(Technically this is comic 213 but yippee! We are in the 200's now! Thank you all so much for reading and cheering me on!)
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free my boy from his own show he did nothing wrong
#they did him soo dirty wth and no one gaf about him at aaaal jentry started to being a dick i mean yeah sure understandable but the rest#of the cast?? they didnt interact with him but judge him as if he was the worst they didnt care to know him uug the show was okay there's#just things like this i didnt like at all i belive it was a wasted opportunity to befriend michael and stella with kit they would definitely#get along i also hated the fact jentry told stella kit wasnt a human when it is something sensitive for him she just came out him and showed#no remorse and faced no consequences that felt so out of character i swear😭 AND I ALSO DISLIKE michael and jentry as partners#it feels as if they are just trying to make their childhood crush real yknow i dont fucking see any intimacy between them besides their#first interactions i mean i dont ship jentry and kit but dude their emotional intimacy is deep they even kinda share the same vision of live#anyway go watch jcvtu so i can know what the sigma happens next i swear if kit doesnt revives i swear#myart#sketch#fanart#jcvtu#jentry chau vs the underworld#kit#kit jcvtu#okay so talking a lil about my sketch mmm i used that photo for the pose because there's no way ill break my head over it and well the thing#kit has in his hands is supposedly the thread he uses for his humans cosplays#if theres anyone reading this excuse my grammar is just that idc im having fun
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rook x lucanis: romance with a commentary track! solas and spite contribute with their thoughts and opinions along the way whether anyone wants them to or not. it's like a MST3K episode up in here as you try to get hot and heavy. in. in the pantry. love among the radishes at the end of the world (rifftrax version)
#still not sure who I'll romance first but I *am* starting to find lucanis just like. inherently hilarious. which is often how it starts.#for me. because of my many faults and flaws as a human being. I can't resist anything I find even slightly funny#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#solas#dragon age spoilers#god please PLEASE let there be a fade section where solas and spite could interact just to complete my Vision here#anyway I think this concept could bring out the absolute troll side of solas that I love and treasure so much#if you annoy him too much in your little fade talks he'll start loudly critiquing your kissing technique in the back of your head#'oh is that how people go about it these days. well. not how I would have done it but to each their own of course'#pls pls I want pass agg dread wolf roasts constantly he's such a bitch he was born for this (affectionate)#I mean only lucanis and the player can hear spite apparently so it'd be more like lucanis looking into the camera like he's on the office#it's so cruel I think he's already going to be real weird at emotional intimacy as it is he shouldn't have to deal#with being bounced against the fourth wall like a little rubber ball on top of it all. sorry about your life (?) lucanis
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getting a little maybe irritated at how often i see autistic will being refuted because he "made himself out to be that way to avoid attention" ... ??? that's autistic. going out of his way to make yourself appear weird and unsociable so you can avoid socializing is. extremely autistic. lying and exaggerating about yourself out of fear of people getting too close and realizing youre a bad person is extremely autistic. the show honestly backpedals on will's empathy half the time, acting like it is only applicable when it comes to his job, but frequently showing that it isn't. in the first episode, hannibal literally notices his face getting red because they're near two people who are arguing. he's not exaggerating or faking his nightmares, his inability to deattach himself from others. yeah, he's got a complicated psychological profile that autism doesn't entirely cover or explain. that doesn't mean he's not still autistic. his person suit, the person he presents himself as to others, the choice to do that autistic masking. even if part of his masking is hiding behind being autistic in hopes it will make him less favorable to others and not further inspected, that is autistic masking. i think it is so insanely annoying that just because a character wasn't written with the intent in mind doesnt mean you cant accidentally write a valid representation of something anyways. fuller didn't intend on hannigram becoming as romantic as it did, but understood that it came along with the subtext anyways. acting like hes completely above fitting criteria of mental illness because he's "fictional" and has a "fictional" disorder that HIGHLY exemplifies autism is. incredibly stupid. and boring
#“his autism is fake and he uses it to protect himself” okay buddy well he seems pretty autistic to me even after that so idk#i guess hes faking his intense specific interests that he maintains when hes completely alone#i guess the ridiculous efforts he goes to to mask and hide himself from others out of fear of them getting close. is just for fun#like he can have his evil other thing going on and also be super fucking autistic about how hes handling it#also!!! kind of think its disgusting to say “oh he was pretending to be autistic to seem weaker”. . okay.#weird fucking perspective#he subconsciously mirrors the people around him even when theres no real benefit to it#his sense of justice is extremely strong which is why he is so perturbed by his violent inclinations#like. you know autistic people can also be manipulative and psychotic and kill people and commit crime. right#its important to me that you know that#hes neurodivergent and i just think its stupid to look at someone who obviously has a comorbid thing going on#and go well! hes completely undiagnosable and inscrutable!!!!!!!!#and like sorry to bryan fuller but the perspective that hes not autistic seems to come from a. severe misunderstanding of asd#like for some reason hyperempathy is the OPPOSITE of autism. like . no it comes with your fucking xbox actually#obviously theyre written with human complexity that would make them difficult to fully diagonse or understand#autistic people arent a list of check boxes. we simply have recurring traits that present differently based on choice and circumstance#im talking in circles atp. hes autistic. idgaf#if you wanna disagree with me on some narrative moral high ground about how crazy complex it is and hes actually yadada#door. im good man#hannibal#will graham#charlieog#cant be autistic if youre faking being a better person than you are#cant be autistic if you try to shape yourself into harmlessness for fear of your violent desires#cant be autistic if youre hyperaware of social interaction and try to use it to protect yourseld#while simultaneously not entirely understanding how normal people interact anyways#cant be autistic if you're prone to manipulation and constantly shifting degrees of empathy for others#starts bashing my head into the wall#moontalk
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look i understand that ai generated content is a controversial topic, and ultimately protecting artists' intellectual property should take moral priority, but i feel like when people say "you don't want character.ai you want to rp with someone" they're kinda missing the point because unlike a chatbot, you can't exactly look your rp partner in the eye and say "that sucked ass. do that again"
#i mean you can but you won't have an rp partner by the end of it!!!#like there's a very specific perk that's being catered to here by removing human interaction#and that is. compromising and cordiality#although i do agree with the general sentiment behind those posts. as in these technologies ARE taking advantage of a very real phenomenon#where people are becoming increasingly lonely and antisocial and afraid of vulnerability in peer-to-peer interaction#anyway if you want some really good opinion pieces on this go read ted chiang's essays on ai for the new yorker#and also the interview he did for the financial times
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So outside of the bond quest events and main story, the characters in Azuma get pretty shallow characterization, huh?
#guardians of azuma#goa#goa spoilers#idk if it counts as spoilers but better safe than sorry lol#i didn't notice it as much when i still had main story stuff to get through but damn interacting with these characters day-to-day is boring#and like every game like this is going to reach a point eventually where you run out of new stuff and it's the same lines over and over#that's the nature of being constructs of humans who couldn't create infinite conversation possibilities after all#but that's not the problem happening here#the daily conversations are at the level of idle small talk at best#the hangout feature (which couldve been real nice) does nothing to put these characters in context (especially not for the low-level hangou#just a five second silent cutscene and an 'i liked this/i hated this'#great you wanna elaborate on that? no?#i ask you about your family and i dont get to learn more about your family or your aversion to the topic?#why even bother then? if thats the feature that means we dont get interesting chats then i wish they'd have just dropped it#and dont even get me started on the fun facts on everyone's profiles#this stuff would've formed the basis for the daily convos in other games but now it's just a little blurb#that you might get a little more context on through events if you're lucky#like murasame's apparently scared of birds? that's sure never come up outside of his character profile from what ive seen#and with ulalaka so intent looking out for him and her having her little bird there was certainly opportunities to at least mention it#even if it's not a little skit maybe a line like 'yeah i tried to get him to slow down but he went running when he saw plenty :('#or however normally cool calm collected murasame actually reacts to birds but now i just have to guess because its not in context#a small detail to get hung up on as an example maybe but small details like that are what make the convos in other games more entertaining#like jones has 4-5 daily conversations on why he hates tomato juice but is trying to aversion therapy himself anyway in 4#that's way more interesting than reading a little fun fact#it's just wasted potential and that's disappointing#like the game is trying to rush you through to the dating/marriage phase and discounting the value of the little everyday buildups#hell i started dating kaguya and at the bare minimum i would think she would get some more romantic lines mixed in to the normal list#but nope she's still saying the exact same things she was before i started dating her but with one extra line in there to summarize one of#her character events (not adding any interesting comment on the event just summarizing it)#if i just wanted a dating sim i would go play a dating sim
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I am so confused, at this point
You've been loud enough with how much you hate me and my mods, so WHY are you still trying to interact with my stuff
I'll repeat myself over and over, but I dont want anything to do with you, not after the shit storm you caused over my mods, not after all the trash talk
#what the fuck man this fandom#hey if you're a piece of shit to me or friends don't go around trying to interact like nothing happened#this is fucking weird and ridiculous#others might work like that but not me - I'm an human being with functioning memory#I'll remember if you've been an ass to me?? be for real now#goddamn dude ahahahha#anyway can properly block now at least#fandom wank
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I fucking hate being traumatized because why am I bawling the hardest I've bawled in god-knows-how-long because someone I didn't even like that much berated Me. gasping wailing trembling and snotting over this for several minutes.
#personal#sanism#abuse mention#child abuse mention#I'm still not entirely done crying really. I'm just trying to stop and calm Myself. not doing well at the moment#because someone on the discord server mentioned trump's inauguration and I basically said 'I don't like trump either#but it's still important to keep pushing for change. who's in office doesn't change that' and he just. immediately escalated the situation#accused Me of not caring about oppression. I explained Myself further but he told Me to go fuck Myself and capped it off with#'you already admitted to being a fucking narcissist so why would i want to be around you' (exact quote BTW)#and I just can't stop sobbing. I don't know if I've cried this much since I was 13. I keep having to pause My typing because I start crying#I didn't hate him but I wasn't attached to him either. it's just that I have so much fucking trauma along these lines#so many instances of My mom putting words in My mouth. getting short-tempered with Me over benign remarks that I didn't understand#because I'm autistic. dismissing My opinions. making Me hide My feelings and issues from her#because she's made it clear that she doesn't trust people like Me#it's made Me have so much trouble handling even friendly social interaction. I've only just learned how to do that#I just can't handle having that same mistreatment forced onto Me by anyone else. especially with so little warning or build-up#and what makes Me break down even worse is the fact that I know I'll have to deal with him again#he wasn't even punished while this was happening. despite the server owner and other mod being online. the owner just said 'stressful day'#and the other mod started talking with a regular user about how it was uncalled for once he had already left the conversation#nobody even checked in on Me. even though I stayed online for a good half-an-hour afterwards. I only just logged off a few minutes ago#because the notifications from unrelated conversations started overstimulating Me#regardless. I don't even want to see him again. I don't want to be in the same server as him I don't want to talk to him I don't want to#but it's not a real formal server. it's a 'friend group.' and they've shown before that they prioritize keeping the peace#over actually punishing hostility. just a week or so ago I told them I wasn't comfortable with them using the R-slur#and someone freaked out over My complaint being 'politically correct' and left. he was brought back just a few days later. and before that#he had already derailed a previous discussion I tried to have about the word by sending gifs featuring it and redirecting the conversation#that sucked but at least it wasn't outright triggering. but I just can't stand the thought of having to be around someone#who treated Me so much like how My abuser has. that's the most I've ever had to relive My trauma because of someone else#that's the most anyone has ever mirrored it to Me. I just can't stand it but I know I'll have to be around him#I don't even know if he's gonna apologize. he's made it clear how little he thinks of Me as a human being. PLUS
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man the way ppl u are starting to get along with drop you like a hot potato the second they find out you don't have an account on their Preferred Ghoulish Social Media is kind of scary....
#ooh sorry i was going to be your friend but then i found out you dont post on instagram so now i dont care#yes we have plenty of other ways of keeping touch online. idgaf tho bye#the alternative is getting pressured into making an account#and for fucking what#its all dead out there#real human beings scroll past as fast as the bots spam#and the only real people who bother interacting are lunatics with no concept of boundaries
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Steven Spielberg is a coward for making a regular version of West Side Story instead of picking that pitch for animated West Side Story with cats back up. We already have regular movie West Side Story, it's called West Side Story 1961, and honestly I don't know how he had the audacity to think that he could make a better or equally good regular movie version of West Side Story. If he had done the animated cats one, though...
#he had such a cool concept available to him and he still decided to make a shittier version of the movie that already exists! what the fuck!#in my mind I see this thing as 2D animated in Don Bluth's style#and it has kind of a Great Mouse Detective thing going on where there's a cat society that parallels the human one#but with a bit more interaction between the cats and humans. like trap and release programs being a thing that exists#and the cats aren't anthro they just have human level intelligence and use human tools sometimes#so really nothing like the Great Mouse Detective. I just really love Great Mouse Detective#there's admittedly some potential pitfalls that would need to be worked out with this concept#like cats are invasive and bad for ecosystems. immigrants are not#I don't have a perfect answer for how I would solve that right now I'm just enjoying the idea of little kitty cat gangs#I would be able to come up with one though. if I actually got an opportunity to make this into a real movie somehow#maybe the Sharks could be an animal that actually belongs on the streets of NYC like... not like raccoons that ties into a racial slur#foxes? yeah they could be foxes while the Jets are cats#that removes some of the meaning of the Jets also being immigrants but that wasn't done as well as it could have been in 1961 anyway#oh my god fox!Maria x cat!Tony... that's so perfect I love that#foxes who historically lived in the forests that were there before NYC was constructed and cats who came in with the non-native humans#instead of it being immigrants vs immigrants it's natives vs european colonizers essentially. damn. it could work I think#west side story#west side story 1961#west side story movie#wss
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#boop....hazel going to Poke Cosmo's Face as well & the ways there's cosmo & wanda backing up each other's closetedness#suppose maybe you Could feel like hey that's not real human skin lol. hmm....#also just cosmo & wanda being this good fit for You Now Have More Parents here#where again like non normative kid? bonus non normative parents and or chaperones? great#then also their just jumping right into getting Involved / Interacting & noticing hazel even when she doesn't expect this#vs her own parents being a bit distracted / busy / more Hands Off in their approach#and cosmo & wanda just not making any assumptions / Asking even when that's unexpected too like; what is it You do#where are you going and why do you want to do that and how come you feel that way & etc. & are obviously willing to roll w/things lol
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lowkey annoying how the same people who say “wesker would not say he loves you” and accuse people who say that of making wesker ooc are the same people who genuinely think he’d kill you for interacting with him, which is also ooc
#like shut up shut up shut up y’all only like him cause he’s hot and you have no actually regard for his character#y’all r so annoying thinking in his general life he’d be genuinely disgusted at a normal human interaction#no he wouldn’t kill you the second he saw you he’s not an impulsive person#y’all only think that because he’s weird as fuck in re5 and you base all your opinions on him strictly on that game#did you forget the part where he literally fucked some girl from edonia ??? and had a partnership with her ???#people who genuinely think he acts like his re5 self in his general life do not know his charcater at all#and it’s so genuinely frustrating to see him so out of character in that way#also people wanting wesker to comfort them does not mean they think he’s a soft little baby man#it’s called having a comfort character#of course the character is gonna be softer#people who go ‘he wouldn’t comfort you he’d kill you in a second’ are the most insufferable people#shut up and let people have a comfort character#i could rant for hours about how wesker is perceived so wrongly by other wesker fans#well.. THOSE wesker fans that r annoying asf#oh lawd#(they just think he’s hot and have only seen him in re5)#daily reminder wesker would not kill you the second you spoke to him 👍#he prob doesn’t know you he has 0 incentive to kill you#like why is he being characterized like a sensitive angry man#why would i ever want to associate wesker with a real man#no thank you
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i am freeeeeeeee [collapses into a pile of dust]
#the last hour went okay bc we were just playing a card game and doing gifts/cards phew#also i found out theyre celebrating my bday on... august 25th? hewwo?? they didn't tell me until now 😭😭#my sister will be back at uni in sept and my parents are leaving on a trip the first day of sept so i'll be alone again for it fsdjkl#which. mixed feelings about that. i won't have to be afraid of them interacting w me but also :'( a little sad to be home alone for it#for the third year in a row fsjdkl#OH WELL. i should just be grateful tbh fdsjkl#the one thing i'm very sad about though is i can't go upstairs anymore bc the new security system has motion detectors#last year i watched jerma on the TV up there and sat on the comfy chairs... it was so fun fdsjkl. can't do that this year though AUGH#alas!!! i will somehow make it fun anyways maybe i will just ask if i can use the oven so i can make myself a cake again this year#SORRY FOR PERSONAL POSTING SO MUCH TONIGHT BTW. its been rough this evening fsdjkl but im going to go draw now :3#dandy.cmd#vent //#ALSO CONGRATS TO ME FOR BEING RLY QUIET AND AGREEABLE AND NOT ADDING ANYTHING NEW TO CONVOS HURRAY#finally i have gone back to highschool me thank GOD i've gotten too comfortable having opinions around them since i graduated fdsjkl#being around people (in the workplace and going to a counselor) who treat you like a Real Human Person will do that! wow!#abuse cw
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I'm just thinking about Look Outside. Game is fucking good man. Game is fucking good....
#RV's Originals#Every day I wake up and start planning what I'm gonna do next game session. Because it's holidays and I can do this.#Just lyin in bed thinking about the guys in it & what could possibly happen in the endings & what I'd like to do in a replay.#It's just such a good setting. And it's all put together so brilliantly. Somehow the monsters make it feel so human#I found this weird thing with Joel where if you get the event where he wants to go get games from his flat and let him go#prompting him to not come back and leave your party#If you re-enter the bathroom he's there again and totally reset to his pre-recruitment state#You can re-recruit him and all his stats and items are reset too#I'm not sure if that's a bug or just a weird oversight but it's pretty interesting. Glad I had a save though.#It's total random chance so when I reloaded he just didn't ask to go get his Super Jump Mans.#I feel weirdly guilty about it though.... He surely learned the truth of what had happened and I just reset it#Such is my power as the game-player....#That being said I don't think the occasional wire-exposing moment detracts from the experience. It's nice to be reminded someone made this.#And I do really like the randomness of the party members and their interactions. More real and interesting.#This is one of the key ways in which I differ from my little brother who will die if a game isn't exclusively governed by his own choices.#Which I imagine is why he likes Advance Wars Re-Bootcamp and I like the original Beach Buggy Racing#Should I tag this? sure I guess. Only live once.#look outside game
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barton being awkward at first or even completely throughout a whole interaction whenever he's trying to comfort people is so in character for him TBH and let me tell y'all why because i think it's important to his character:
he can fake a lot of things. barton can fake being nice to people, he can fake being innocent, and he can even fake having a much stronger sense of morality around people if he wants to — but whenever it comes to empathizing with someone on an emotional level... barton finds himself often struggling with faking it because of the nature of it. and this is due to it being different than whenever he's trying to feign something easily comprehensible like innocence. but empathy is something that's usually viewed as innate in us as humans and has to do with love, which doesn't depend on logic. it's something that comes from within, so it doesn't have clear parameters as to how you should do it, so whenever barton tries to fake it in the event that he's trying to make someone feel better; he'll stumble. and so although barton can cognitively empathize with someone, his efforts to actually put himself in other people's shoes fall flat, as he just can't physically imagine himself being in someone else's position probably more than half the time.
so if your muse were to ever come to him seeming upset, barton would likely not know what to do / how to comfort them, at least for a bit before referencing back on how he's seen other people do it. because i hate to say it (i don't, in reality, but y'all know what i mean LOL) but barton does actively mimic behaviors that he sees people do whenever he feels the absence of a certain emotion. he especially does this whenever he's trying to appear charming to other people, but like i said, he'll also try to use what he's seen his peers do as a guide as for what he should do in regards to empathy. and sometimes he may even seem a bit flustered before he's able to do this because he knows that it is expected of him to be able to empathize with people and can identify it in other people BUT knowing how to approach faking it has always been sort of hard for him even as an adult.
but yeahhh, that's just my own two cents about how barton sometimes break character that he is quote unquote ' normal, ' though he does try to mask this around people who aren't really familiar with him as simply being social awkwardness. however, it is part of a larger thing with him as despite the fact that he can blend in with the population REALLY well and also is pretty good at manipulating others, i suppose you could say that barton is still not an expert at ' constructing empathy ' because whenever someone is visibly hurt in front of him... he is more liable to act like he isn't sure what to do, than to put on an act immediately since he is likely to feel nothing first before anything else. and i realize that that is a rather unsettling thought, but i think that he is a lot more suspectible to doing this with people he doesn't know well / who he isn't particularly close to, as he's got a lot more practice with being falsely empathetic towards friends and/or sometimes even family members.
#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#YOUR NEED GREW TEETH: character study.#ANGER'S HELPED ME STAY ALIVE: headcanons.#yeah so i do know that this does bring up some questions because if barton mimics emotions then how do you know whether he's being truly-#genuine or not whenever he's interacting with someone? and wellll that is honestly a rather good question bc i feel like sometimes it IS-#probably hard to tell whether he is actually feeling these things rather than just putting on an act in front of people though i feel as if#it's possible that you'd be able to tell in general if you pay close attention to what his tells are for lying / i think humans just in-#general are able to sense whenever someone is not being 100% authentic and i believe i've mentioned this before BUT barton does sometimes-#give off weird / bad vibes sometimes so that could help another character figure out that he mayyy or may not be being real with them rn.#so yeahhh i know that this isn't the most happy or light thing go talk about at 10:30 in the morning on a Sunday but JSJSJ what can i sayyy#/ j JSJSJ nahhh I'm kidding around with y'all but i did promise you guys that I would post fluff so i still fully intend on doing that#my brain just decided it was time to explain some thing's about barton's behavior / some context behind it bc i always like delving deep-#Into my character like this (':#tw: potentially disturbing content.#tw: discussions of symptoms of a mental illness.#tw: mentions of manipulation.
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smiling when youre sad and/or angry is genuinely so ass because annoying people will assume youre okay with them but its actually like "please stop im going to murderize you."
#thoughts#and opinions#there are like two people i interact with that make me mad but they are real life people and dont have tumblr#and i smile at them a lot but its less of a happy smile and more of a “im going to kill you” smile#so when i snap they take it personally but no i've just been done with you since the conversation began#i just physically cannot drop the expression-based hints you so desperately cling to for social interactions#and i cant be vocal about it or im being rude#shoutout to all my homies who wished snarling was an acceptable form of “please leave me alone” in humans
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