#and garak's like hm. what if i made a grand gesture of sacrifice

[sapphosewrites]

garashir bad ending

(This was inspired by asking myself what I thought Julian would not forgive)

"I fail to see what you find so upsetting."

"Do you really?"

"You knew who I was when you married me."

"You're right. I agreed to marry a paranoid ex-spy with no respect for his husband's privacy or boundaries. My patients didn't."

"I didn't harm your patients."

"You cannot possibly believe that I would excuse your extremely illegal and highly unethical accessing of hospital files, tracking down my patients, and interrogating them because you have this ridiculous idea that I've been hiding an affair from you."

"It was hardly an interrogation. When I was in the Obsidian Order-"

"I want a divorce, Garak. Oh, so that's what shuts you up, is it? I mean it. You've absolutely crossed the line. You've destroyed my professional integrity and quite possibly the hospital's reputation. People need to be able to trust us in order to receive care, and you've jeopardized that. You've compromised the healing of people who know exactly what kind of interrogating you did in the Obsidian Order, and are terrified to be on the receiving end of it again. If you've convinced yourself I'm fucking someone else and lying to you about it, fine, I figured out that you were never going to trust I love you. But you don't do this. You go and- and- I don't know, call Ezri on subspace and ask for a counseling session or get drunk and read terrible poetry or blow up your damn shop again. You can self-sabotage as much as you like, and you've shown very well that I'm powerless to stop you. But you do not get to sabotage my patients."

"If I apologized..."

"Was that unfinished sentence your idea of an apology?"

"My dear, I'm sorry."

"I'm sure you are! I'm sure you'll go and wallow in self-loathing and enjoy it very much, but that can't be how this works, Garak. I shouldn't have to ask for a divorce in order for you to admit you did something wrong. If this is what our marriage is going to be now, then I... I can't, Garak. I don't know what it is that would help you, but whatever it is, I can't provide it."