#and eventually collides would they go out their way to actually bother too deeply converse

[someweirdoreblogger]

doodling off the side

[eclipsedpascal]

Making Daddy Proud

Stepdad!Duncan x Female Reader

After moving in with your estranged mother and her new husband, Duncan Shepherd, you started to grow very close to your new stepdad. The two of you had a great relationship and he was doing his best to be a good father figure for you, knowing you missed your dad so much. But there was a problem, you found yourself insanely attracted to him and were starting to notice little things indicating he might feel the same way.

Warnings: very inappropriate relationships, Stepfather/stepdaughter relationship, Cheating is ofc implied, 20+ year age gap, daddy kink, unprotected sex (but I kinda imagined the reader to be on birth control so is okie😌) fingering (female receiving), choking, vaginal sex, oral (male receiving) and face fucking😃

Notes: Okie sooo I know some people will hate this fic and ofc I understand that, but if you do hate it then please don't send me any hate!! just don't read it🖤 anywayss I got dis ask saying "Concept: Stepdad Duncan x naive reader😉" nd omg i LOVE the whole concept of Stepdad!Duncan sm, like if you've been in the fandom for a while you'll probably know the fic "The Hand That Robs the Cradle" by Langdonsrapture nd that fic was my holy grail when it came out!! so you know I just had to go all out here nd get carried away writing it hehe:')

word count: 5.4k

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The opportunity to study political science at American University in Washington DC had been one you simply couldn’t pass up on, but unfortunately it meant moving away from your father to stay closer to campus grounds. You knew it was worth it in the long run, I mean you had been waiting on this chance for years and wanted to make your father proud, but you would miss him.

He was never home too much, always busy working, but he meant the world to you. It had been just the two of you for a long time now. Your mother had moved away once their divorce finalised 7 years ago, impulsively leaving you in his custody as she ran off and gallivanted around the world, meeting all sorts of interesting men she would tell you about.

Luckily for you, she had settled down with one of those interesting men in DC recently, and upon discovering your acceptance into the prestigious university she had offered you a place to stay whilst you studied.

It was a frightening move to make, but staying with your mother in DC had actually been pretty interesting. You hadn’t spent time with her in so long and it had been nice to catch up with her, I mean sure she had been a little distant, but that was expected with having not spent any real time with her in so long.

You were just grateful she had let you stay with her in the first place, thinking she would have probably preferred to be left alone with her new husband, Duncan Shepherd.

They had been married about four months when you moved in and from what you could see, things were going well; especially considering she had sprung the engagement on everyone pretty fast. You were just happy knowing she was happy.

Though you had only met the man in question once before moving in, he really seemed like a perfect partner. He didn’t have a single obvious flaw to him, but see that was the problem. He was completely flawless to you.

You had tried to find things you didn’t like about him, even just tiny things, thinking hating him would be far better than thinking of him the way had been, but no matter what you did, you just couldn’t seem to fault him. And the longer you stayed with them, the worse your little problem became.

You weren’t 100% sure of how old he was. You only knew he was in his early to mid forties. But being at least 20 years your senior, you knew he was definitely old enough to be fulfilling the role he was as your stepfather. It felt strange to have a new stepdad at the age of 20, (almost 21) but it was even stranger with you being so blindly attracted to him.

And it wasn’t even just his looks. Though, yes, they were quite the spectacle, it was more than that. He was confident and cocky, always knowing exactly what to do and say to make the people around him do whatever he wanted them to. He could make you laugh until your stomach was in cramps, and not just through telling dad jokes. Charisma rolled off of him in waves.

He was intuitive and crafty; smart to put in plainly. And his interests appeared to be more intellectually based than anything else, which was quite the opposite of your mother, so it baffled you as to how your mother had managed to snatch him up so easily in the first place.

Now it’s not that you were jealous, really. It was more that you didn’t understand how these two polar opposite personality’s had ended up colliding together in the manner that they had.

Whenever the three of you would sit and have an evening meal together, Duncan always made you feel welcomed in the conversation, which was a great comfort to both you and your mother, being the relationship you had was so strained. Because of this and the fact you both had quite a lot in common when it came to your interests, Duncan and you had become almost good friends in the small time that you had been living there.

It was obvious he was doing his best to be some kind of fatherly figure to you. knowing that you were missing your actual dad, he did his best to help you with the things he knew your dad usually would. Whether it was school work or just having someone to joke with from time to time. He was there.

Sometimes when he was there, though, you felt like maybe, just maybe, he felt something more too. Such as the moments where his stares would linger on your form for just a little too long, or the way he would sometimes fix your hair for you if it had strayed across your face the wrong way. Just small things he did that fatherly figures didn’t typically tend to do with their daughters; especially when his wife, your mother, was right there. Sure, she seemed oblivious to it, but you certainly weren’t.

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Taking your now lukewarm cup of coffee from the breakfast bar counter, you brought it to your lips and gulped the bitter liquid down, fighting viciously to stay alert. It was nearing 3am and you had been writing for hours. Concentrating was no longer your most favourable asset and your half lidded eyes were growing wearer by the minute, but you just had to finish this paper.

It was 17 percent of your grade and due in two weeks. A persuasive essay on propaganda within the current American political climate and you had been slowly working at it for weeks, but you knew if you left it hanging over your head any longer it would drive you insane.

Sitting back in the stool you resided on, you took quick solace in the many noises coming from the ajar kitchen window, listening to a low rumble of thunder, accompanied by the constant pitter patter of rain falling from the gloomy DC sky above. It had been hot and humid all week, eventually cultivating into large clouds that had now given in, spilling out showers for almost the entire day past.

You recalled all the time you’d spent by the pool with your mother and Duncan in the past week, enjoying the current heatwave by sunbathing next to it on one of the many loungers. The house was kind of set up like a hotel that way. With Duncan always needing to be prepared for any events he may have to hold for his company’s business associates or press, he had furnished the home with what was to the three of you, unnecessary seating and tableware; amongst other things.

You stirred, returning your eyes back to the last few lines you had written and attempted to go over them in your head, but quickly realised you couldn't even manage that without stumbling over them or jumbling the words up beyond comprehension.

Abruptly interrupting your confused stream of thought, was the kitchen door groaning open. So with a frown plastered to your face, you shot your head up to recognise the intruder. But your frown was quickly blown away at discovering that it was Duncan who had entered the balmy room, and he was in more glory than you had ever seen him.

You had seen his silhouette whilst he showered before. Having gone into his and your mother’s shared bedroom whilst searching for earrings, you had seen him through the whited out, frosted glass of the on-suit bathroom door. But this was something entirely different. This was him, stood in kitchen doorway with nothing on but his grey Calvin Klein boxers.

“Y/N? I didn’t know you were still up.” He quirked a brow at you, wondering why you were still sat in the kitchen so late at night. You swallowed deeply at the sight of him. Your eyes magnetised to his body, dilating with such a sultry image before them. Pulling your eyes back up to his face, you hoped he hadn’t seen their little detour down to his crotch.

“Uhm.. i’m, uh.. w-working on an essay.” Fuck! He’ll definitely know how nervous you are now. You looked away from him, too embarrassed to face him and cringing at your own attempt to speak. “It’s due in next week and I wanted to get it finished.” Okay that’s better, you thought. Maybe he’ll just think you’re just too tired to have a proper conversation or something.

“Oh, right,” he trailed off, looking you up and down a bit as he walked further into the room. You watched the back of his head as he opened the fringe, holding it open and scanning the contents of it. Deciding on a small bottle of water, he retrieved it from the middle shelf before closing the door and walking over to lean on the opposite side of the counter from you.

He didn’t seem too bothered by the fact he was practically undressed in front of you. Of course, you weren't complaining, but it was interesting. You tried to think of something else you could add to your open word document, wanting to distract yourself from his displayed body. But thinking as hard as you possibly could, your mind still brought you nothing.

You awkwardly pulled at the sleeve of your oversized ‘American University” sweater and hoisted it back up onto your shoulder. It had ridden down your arm whilst you were aggressively fiddling with your fingers - a nervous habit you had developed in your early teens. People would often point it out to you, but it was just one of those things you couldn’t stop doing.

There was a deafening silence stuffed between the two of you. So looking around the room, you tried to focus on anything in your line of vision that wasn’t him. It was just too hard seeing him like; his plump lips wrapped around the bottle’s mouth as he drank, his sleepy un-styled curls falling just above his perfectly manicured brows and wearing nothing but those fucking grey boxers. He was making it unbearably hard not to stare.

Deciding to speak, you cleared your throat. “So did you just wake up? Or could you not sleep?”

“Just couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about the most random shit.. and you know how your mom is, she snores a lot.” He chuckled. His eyes never leaving you, beginning to feel as if they were boring holes into your soul as you kept full eye contact with him.

“Yeah, that must get pretty annoying.” You nodded slowly, thinking about how many nights you had spent wide awake when you were younger, all due to her roaring, loud snores passing through the paper thin walls of your childhood home.

“It does.” A smile played on his lips, taking another swig of water before speaking again. “so what’s the essay about?”

“It’s that one I was telling you about a few weeks ago, if you remember. it’s a persuasive on propaganda within the current American political climate.” You reminded him of the conversation you had about it when he dropped you off to class one morning not too long ago. The two of you often carpooled together, with the University campus being so close to his office, it made for an easy drive on the days he was needed in.

You guys would listen to playlists together on the drive and make fun of each others music taste, that was when you weren’t too busy being amazed by how similar they could be.

“Are you struggling with it? I mean, it is getting pretty late now.” He turned to check the clock which hung on the wall behind him, then looked back at you questioningly.

Duncan was good at helping you with this kind of thing. He was extremely well versed in politics, with his family’s background and all. Your mom had told you he used to be very involved with the white house, saying when he was younger he even went to prison for a short time before president underwood had pardoned him.

“I just can’t concentrate, but I really need to get it done or it’ll stress me out.” You lifted your bare feet up onto the stool seat, your knees coming up to your chest so you could rest your chin on them. You were only wearing panties with the sweater, it being too hot to wear anything more.

“Can I come over and check it?” He closed his bottle of water, tightening the lid with his muscular arms as he spoke. You had almost forgot he wasn’t wearing much before he said this, but watching him screw the bottle cap on as he asked to could come round to your side of the counter? It had you weak for him all over again.

“Uh.. yeah, course.” He padded his bare feet over the white, tiled flooring towards you, placing the bottle down on the counter and moving behind you to read the most recent paragraphs you had written. His hand was stretched over to the other side of you, resting on the edge of the breakfast bar as the skin of his arm grazed across your back.

Even with you being sat on such a tall stool, he still managed to tower over you. His hight was usually intimidating as it was, but with the added factor of him being almost completely undressed it was even worse. A small waft of air blew his expensive cologne towards you, creeping past your nostrils and possessing your senses completely before you started to feel his breathe on your upper neck. It wasn’t heavy, but it was enough to make your cunt start pulsating.

You were disgusted by yourself. He’s your mother’s husband! And your Stepdad! What the fuck was wrong with you? You could only imagine what people’s reactions would be if they knew of the truly sinful thoughts you had about him, and you hated yourself for it.

He was your type, yes. A rich, older man who wasn’t actually an asshole, and they were hard to come by, but that wasn’t relevant. You needed to control yourself. No matter how hard that may be.

“What you have so far is really good. Your argument is strong and as always with your work, it’s written well. You’re smart, Y/N. It’s impressive.” He humoured himself with a scoff, his voice interrupting your lewd thoughts.

You blushed at his compliment, hiding your face behind your knees slightly and looking up at him. “Thanks, Duncan.” You knew he was just trying to be a good dad figure to you, but you couldn’t help being attracted to the way he was so caring for you. Maybe it’s fucked up, but it’s not your fault all you need is an older man’s approval to become turned on.

“I mean it.” He looks so sincere as he talks to you. His face would be intimately close to yours if you hadn’t hidden it from him earlier. You notice his eyes flicker down to your lips for a split second, and then back up to your eyes again. His stare no longer felt friendly, but more.. lustful. Were you crazy or was he really doing this?

Suddenly he looks away from you, moving his eyes back to the laptop’s screen. “Maybe you should just get some sleep. I know you said it’ll stress you out, but if you get some rest you’ll be able to get back into it tomorrow with better concentration.” He does his best to steer the conversation back to where is once was, reminding himself that you’re his fucking step daughter and that he has a beautiful wife sleeping just upstairs.

“I know that, its just..” You sighed, blinking up at him. You brought your legs back down you hang over the edge of the seat, but you couldn’t stop thinking about how close he was to you, wanting to do nothing more than to drape your arms behind his neck an-.

“Nope I won’t listen to it. From what I can see it’s an incredibly strong piece of work already, so just go get some sleep and come back to it in the morning, okay sweetheart?” He laughed a little, looking down at you again.

That nickname. Sweetheart. He called you it all the time and yet it always managed to take your breath away. But the thing is, he usually wasn’t this close to you when he did. So when you squeezed your legs together and bite down on your bottom lip, doing your best to ease the overwhelming desire you felt for him in that moment, there was no way he hadn’t seen it.

You were frozen staring at him, his face static and unreadable. You hoped he didn't choose to shout at you for how repulsive your behaviour was, or maybe he would kick you out? Your mind began spiralling, wrapping itself in intricate knots as you held your breath, awaiting a reply from him.

“Do you like that? When I call you sweetheart.” His voice was deep, sultry and dripping with desire. Shock coursed through you. That was definitely not what you had expected him to say. He seemed even larger now, his confidence making you feel small in comparison as your mind scrabbled to find the words you were supposed to use in your current predicament, but it never found any.

"You like it when daddy gives you nicknames?” He moved his hand up and delicately grasped the skin where your neck met your jaw, his eyes half lidded with lust. Your heart was beating so fast now and your breathing had grown shallow. You were so lost for words, only able to whimper out a weak “yes” before looking down to his boxers, trying to avoid his eyes but still wanting him just as much as he now appeared to want you.

He lifted your chin and kissed you roughly, drinking in your lips as if you were the water he had ventured down stairs for all along; and you began to wonder if you perhaps were. Maybe you were what he had been craving, just as you had been craving him.

He pulled the stool closer to him with his spare hand, leading you to wrap your legs around his torso as you tangled your tiny fingers through his sleep rustled hair. It was passionate. His kiss was sloppy, yet perfectly executed as his tongue slipped past your lips to glide over your own. His greying stubble dug into your skin, burning it with pure contact.

You parted to breath; and for just a moment, though it felt like hours, you stared into each others eyes with a ferociously neither of you could nor wanted to tame.

He tuts. “You really shouldn’t drink so much coffee little one, it’s not good for you. And it’s all I can taste.” He couldn’t help but reprimand you for the little habit, he had just gotten so used to doing it over the past three months, and using it to tease you sounded even more appealing.

You opened your mouth to speak, but were cut off when he lunged at you again, kissing you viciously. He began to move his hands all across your body, his fingertips grazing over every inch of you they possibly could as he started to undress you, pulling your oversized sweater above your head and taking handfuls of your breasts. He was kneading them, leaning down to kiss and suck on them whilst he watched you throw your head back, completely enthralled by him.

You were taken aback by how quick things had escalated, your sense of control had deteriorated far too rapidly and was ebbing away even further with each little kiss he left on your skin.

His large hand slid down to your panties, playing with the lacy bow that was centred on the waist band. He hovered his hand over your heat, cupping it and feeling just how sticky you had become for him. You let out a moan, all sense of wrong and right leaving you completely as you uttered a soft “Daddy” and ground your cunt into the palm of his hand.

“That’s right. So desperate for daddy.” He mused, ripping your thin underwear off and dropping it down onto the floor beneath you. Bringing his face to yours again, your noses bumped and leant on each other for some kind of purchase, the both of you watching his hand as he rubbed his fingers through your folds, gathering a fair amount of slick on them before pressing two inside you.

“Ahh!!” You let out a moan, it was louder than you expected and reminded you of what was really going on here. Having been too caught up in the moment, you hadn’t even thought about how being complete fucking naked with your step father between your legs would look if your mother had decided to come downstairs.

“Ah, ah, shh baby. We don’t wanna get now caught do we?” His breathe was hot on your lips, whispering as to not alert anyone. “So tight.”

You whispered back. “I’m sorry daddy, it was an accident- mmph!” You muffled your moan.

“That’s it. Who’s my good girl?” He lay a gentle peck on you lips, only stopping as to allow you to answer his question.

“I am daddy!! I’m your good girl!” You spoke with urgency, but did your best to keep the volume low, which was quite the struggle in between moans. Duncan could see this, so he pressed your lips together. Kissing you into a muffled silence.

You felt his spare hand on your neck, squeezing it just enough for you to still breathe okay when he pulled away from your mouth, moving his lips to the shell of your ear and biting the lobe. He murmured in your ear. “Do you know how hard it was, this week? Having to sit there next to your mom at the poolside and see you just lying there like that?! That fucking bikini. It took everything in me not to cum right there.”

His fingers were moving slowly, going in deep and curling up against your g spot, making you cry out and lean on his shoulder, biting it to keep yourself quiet. he started to rub your clit in hard circles. He was so experienced. It was mind-blowing.

“Would it have served you more pleasure to know, I only wore it for you?” It was true, you had only worn it for him and it had obviously worked. You certainly had his attention now. He growled at this, pulling his fingers out and slapping your cunt.

He yanked your neck closer to him, speaking down to you. “Just for that? Get on your fucking knees.” As soon as he let go of your throat you were climbing off the stool and onto the floor. The heat of the room, and of your acts too, made the marble tiling feel like ice pressed onto your flushed skin. But you didn't care.

You watched him pull his boxers down, cock springing free, adjacent to his stomach. Never having been with anyone of this size before, you had never seen a cock this big. You reached out and touched it, feeling just how hard he was. He hissed at the contact, looking down at you as you watched his facial expressions with wide eyes.

You played with it in your hand, stroking it with one and palming his balls with the other. He stroked his fingers through your hair, giving you a reassuring look as you licked the tip. The salty taste hit your tongue, making you crave his cock even more. So without another second going to waste, you took him into your mouth as far as you could.

“Ahh fuck!” You began bobbing your head, your eyes fixed on him as a groan left his lips. He was watching you intently, threading his fingers through your hair and onto your scalp to get a good grip on your head. You let your jaw go loose, knowing what he was about to do and preparing yourself for it.

He started thrusting his hips into your face, his cock hitting the back of your throat with almost every shove. You had honestly impressed yourself, I mean you knew you gave good head, but taking a cock this big as it fucked into your throat was something to be proud of.

“Mmm that’s it sweetheart.” Your stomach fluttered at his approval. The gagging noises you were making giving him even more pleasure. “You just wanna make daddy proud, don’t you princess?” You mumbled a wet “yes daddy” around his cock, sending sweet vibrations through it as he pushed himself as far as he could into your throat.

You couldn't even fathom how this was happening. You had pictured this moment late at night with a vibe pressed to your clit far too many times to count, so it finally happening was something hard to comprehend. Somehow he looked even more handsome from down on your knees than you had ever imagined he would. His stubble contouring his face perfectly with the ‘o’ his lips were forming.

Suddenly pulling you off of him, you gasped out for oxygen and tried to wipe away some of the saliva dribbling down your chin. It was like a snapshot from one of Duncan’s wet dreams. You looked so incredibly fucked out. He thought it was beautiful.

“Come on little one, stand up. Daddy wants to fuck that tight little pussy of yours.” You moaned as he talked down to you, stroking his calloused thumb over your bottom lip and pulling it down just to watch it bounce back up again.

You stood up, finally wrapping your arms around his shoulders like you had wanted to all this time. He pulled you in for a kiss, one much slower than the rest, communicating something more to you than just pure sexual carnality. His embrace was comforting, making you feel protected and small in his arms.

His hands grabbed at your ass as he picked you up, sitting you back down onto the bar stool and adjusting the hight while his lips stayed connected to yours. Once the seat was low enough for his liking, he picked up your thighs, shelving them onto his hips and laying you back just enough so that you could lean on the backrest.

The room was sweltering, your body hot against his and anticipating having him buried inside you was getting too much to handle. He dragged his cock through your lips, teasing your clit and moving back down to almost enter you, but he never would. Just wanting to get you all worked up and loving the way you would squirm when he did.

“Daddy.. please.” You steadied yourself by holding on to the sides of the seat, hoping he would end his tournament and fuck you already.

He slid the head barely into you. “Hmm… Since you were so polite, suppose daddy should reward you.” He spoke calmly before snarling and stuffing himself into you, pushing as deeply as he physically could. He felt your walls clamp around him as he set his pace. It was a lot. Having never taken a cock this big and the fact he didn’t even let you adjust, you couldn’t help but wail out.

He shot his hand up to cover your mouth, needing to keep you quiet and seeing you clearly couldn’t do it yourself. “Wouldn’t want to wake up mommy now, would you baby?” you attempted to utter a “No daddy”, but his hand kept your lips glued shut.

He fucked you. Like really really fucked you. He was making the stool shuffle underneath you, the powerfulness of his thrusts causing you to slide down in the seat. The only reason you didn’t slip off completely being the barbarian hold he had on your hips.

It actually surprised you how rough he was. A pleasant surprise, of course, but he had been so delicately caring towards you since becoming your step father and now here you were, receiving the best of both worlds.

The closer you grew to your high, the more incoherent your thoughts became. His eyebrows were scrunched together, lips trembling as he picked you up off the seat and held you closer to him. Supporting your ass, his hips ricocheted up and off yours as he tried desperately not to yell out.

His thumb was brought back down to your clit as he pressed you up against him, swiping at it hellishly, trying to hurry up your release upon feeling your legs begin to quiver; and knowing his own was approaching rapidly.

“That’s it sweetheart, come around daddy’s cock… Gonna cum so fucking deep inside your cunt. Would you like that?” You could see a thin line of perspiration cascading down his cheekbone, he was almost breathless and his thrusts were messier now.

“Yes da-AHH!“ you whipped a hand up to your face, holding your mouth shut as you came. You dug the hand you had placed on his shoulder deep into his skin and was quickly reminded of his marriage to your mother. You hoped you hadn't left any nail indents she might see.

You felt his hot seed spurt onto your walls as he rested his head on yours, mouth open wide and letting out a silent groan. His release was long and powerful. The both of you were left panting, the only noise in the room being your own breaths and a small creak from the stool when he softly set you down onto it.

He pulled out, your mixed juices gushing out of you along with the sexual haze you had been overcome with. The severity of what you had just done began to settle in. His head still resting on yours as you started freaking out, contemplating what would happen if your mother was to ever find out what had just occurred.

You wrapped your arms around his back, needing his comfort and squeezing him in an urgent hug, which he returned. his fingers stroked the sweaty skin of your back, trying to ease the thoughts he too had running through his mind. He lifted your chin up, the look he had in his eyes telling you everything would be okay.

Kissing you cautiously, he savoured the feeling of your lips on his and prayed he would get a chance to feel them again. “Are you okay?” He whispered

You didn’t really know if you were. On one hand, that was something you had wanted for a long time and it had been far better than you ever imagined, but on the other you had just helped your stepfather cheat on your mother. “I don’t know. I think so.”

He stood up, grabbing your sweater and panties, handing them to you before putting his boxers back on. “Well, at least that paper won’t seem like such big problem now.” He chuckled, doing his best to find humour in a humourless situation.

You giggled a little, hurrying to throw on your sweater and being reminded of how he had ruined your panties. “True. Now this can hang over my head instead.” You wiped any left over salvia you had on your face onto your sleeve and thought about how you would probably need to shower after this. “At least the sex was worth it, right?”

He sent you a dark smirk, picking up his bottle of water and walking towards the kitchen door. “It was. hopefully it'll be just as good next time too.” You opened your mouth, faking shock at his confidence as you watched him open the door.

“Goodnight Y/N” He gave you one last look as he sauntered through the door, getting ready to close it behind him and leave you alone in the kitchen with no one but your thoughts. The thoughts of your acts. Remembering all the little moments you had just shared together.

In that last moment before he left, you struck eye contact with him, chewing your inner lip and speaking.

“Goodnight, daddy.”

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Thank you sm for reading!🥺🖤

Tags: @dark-mei-rose @sojournmichael @ntxoza @blakescoven @ghostangels @jimmason @fernfiction @brattylovee @7-wonders @angelicmichael @melodylangdon @instincts-baby i'm so so sorry if you don't like this kinda fic or it has triggered you in anyway, but just let me know if it has and I won't tag you in this kind of thing ever again! You can also let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list too:)

[serenasoutherlyns]

Not a Summer Crush Part One

a/n: calex x reader/ofc. welcome to part one! all feedback is appreciated. forgive any errors. set in au-present day svu. all fluff, allusions to svu type situations.

Part One

You never admit when you have a crush. Not to your friends, not to your crush, and certainly not to yourself. You're a one-night stand type of girl, and ideally with strangers whose names you don’t even know. You got off, they got off, and nobody had to worry about calling in the morning. That was how you'd managed to reach 27 without ever having a serious relationship (and, you thought, having a job in the DA's office at 27 spoke to the efficacy of your strategy). You sure as hell intended on keeping that streak going. But, ever since you started this new job three months ago, something strange was happening.

It was Casey and Alex, that was who was to blame for these pesky feelings. You couldn't help it, they were just infuriatingly sweet when it came to their relationship. Most people in long-term committed relationships were completely miserable at least as far as you could tell, but whenever someone mentioned Alex around Casey she got this energetic glow in her green eyes, like how you got when people mentioned puppies, unadulterated adoration. And when Alex talked about Casey, she went on for as long as anybody would listen about her intelligence, beauty, and cute habits, her interests, and talents. Their whole dynamic was nauseating. And yet, when you saw them, you felt this annoying warmth building in your icy heart. Maybe this was all simple professional adoration, that was a good excuse. You only wanted what they had because they both outranked you, Alex being Bureau Chief, Casey Assistant Bureau Chief. Of course, you admired them both. Yeah, that was it. When you looked into Alex's office and saw Casey there, answering emails on her couch and waiting for her wife to come back from court, the blush in your cheeks was only about Casey's dedication to her work. You certainly didn't have a crush, especially not on two people, not on your superiors.

So, you vowed not to think twice about it when Alex showed up at the office you shared with the other Junior ADAs one Monday morning and placed a cup of coffee on your desk.

"Morning, Haley," she said as you looked up from your work. "You're in early today."

"Yeah, I'm swamped with this St. Benedict's case," you said, explaining your presence. "There are just so many moving pieces, so many people to blame. I'm just trying to figure out my strategy here." You rubbed your temples. You'd rushed out of the apartment that morning, saying a quick goodbye to Ashley and the girls after your shower, you had only gotten a few sips of drip coffee in before rushing away on your bike. You were deeply touched by Alex's kind gesture in caffeinating you. You took a sip, still going on about the case. You pulled back from the cup in surprise as you recognized the taste of honey.

"Is this a café miel?" you asked. She had brought you your favorite special coffee. You expected plain black or a latte, something generic. "How did you know I loved these?"

Alex smiled, thoroughly charmed by your frantic early-morning energy. She wasn't sure why, but while she was in line picking up for herself and Casey, she'd remembered you going on about the virtues of coffee and honey to another poor Junior ADA who definitely hadn't asked. The way you talked about what you liked was cute to her, and watching you thank her now confirmed to her that it had been a good choice.

"I heard you talking Anderson's ear off about it yesterday," she told you. You looked at her sheepishly.

"I think he hates me," you said, fiddling with the outer sleeve of the cup.

No way does anybody hate this girl, Alex thought, but replied, "I was getting coffee for myself and Casey and thought I'd be nice to the new kid." Alex paused, hovered a little waiting for you to say something, but you seemed lost in thought. "Earth to Haley," she said. "Caroline?"

You snapped out of it. Your thoughts were split in two, half picking apart your case and half trying to figure out how to feel and react when your supervisor brings you your favorite kind of coffee. "Oh, I'm so sorry," you said, "I was just thinking about this nun..." You trailed off. At that, Alex actually laughed.

"OK, well, I'll let you get back to work. Let me or Casey know if you need another set of eyes." She started to leave but you stopped her, reaching under your desk for something.

"Wait, Cabot, how much do I owe you?" you asked, your manners catching up to your mind.

Alex only smiled. "Nothing. My treat."

"Thanks," you said as she left. You kept thinking about the conversation all day. How Alex had clearly paid attention to you, gone out of her way to do something nice for you. But it started to feel suspiciously like a crush as you sat on your couch thinking about Alex's slender fingers handing you your favorite drink early in the morning, how special it had made you feel. So, you weren't going to think about it again.

You also didn't think about it when, one warm evening, you literally ran into Casey on your daily run in the big park by the office.

You looked up after your head bumped another runner's shoulder. You tugged your earbuds out, dangling them around your neck, apologizing profusely. You completely zoned out when you were moving, so this happened a lot more often than you might like to admit. Today, you were deep in thought about a case law issue, and the park had all but ceased to exist in your perception.

"It's fine, Haley, calm down," you heard a familiar voice say, making you realize that you'd nearly trampled Casey Cabot Novak. You let out a mortified squeak.

Casey surprised herself. She was not at all bothered like she might usually be upon being rudely collided with on a very wide running path. Instead, she found your focus and bashfulness kind of... cute? Your face and chest were flushed red from exercise, your hair was falling out of its messy bun, and you had on a neon pink shirt with a neon orange running skirt, it looked like a toddler had dressed you.

You kept apologizing until Casey grabbed your shoulders and told you to stop.

"Join me for my last mile?" She asked, and you agreed. You kept the pace slow enough for small talk, Casey asked you, "So, what's up with the neon creamsicle look?"

"Oh my god," you chuckled as you rounded a corner, "a 6-year-old packed my gym bag."

While you showered that evening, you kept going over your afternoon. You were very embarrassed and a little horny, and couldn't get the image of a breathless, sweaty, Casey out of your mind. You decided these feelings were just to be blamed on runners' high and pushed them from your mind.

---

"You know, I really like the new junior ADA," Alex said as she splashed her face with warm water. Casey spit the toothpaste out of her mouth and cupped some water into it, swishing it around.

She spit again and said, "Anderson? He's fine, I guess. A little slow to object, a little quick to make a deal, but he'll get the hang of it."

"Haley," Alex said almost under her breath, patting moisturizer underneath her eyes.

"Oh," Casey replied, slightly flatly. "I've noticed."

Alex gave her a glare out of the side of her eyes as she removed a contact. "Not like that, my love. I just think she's a really good lawyer. Promising."

"She is. But I've also seen how you look at her."

"With professional respect," Alex said, rinsing the lens solution off her fingers. Casey's nighttime routine was much simpler, so she just watched her wife in the mirror, leaning against the shower door.

"Sure," Casey said, letting the silence hang between them. "Lex, you’re my wife. I know how you are when you're attracted to someone."

Alex turned around, leant against the counter, took Casey's hand in her own and ran her thumb across her wedding ring. "Are you jealous?"

"No," Casey said, kissing her wife. "You know, I might be if I didn't completely get it."

Alex sighed with relief. She hadn't exactly intended to get into this conversation.

"She is a bit young."

"If I recall correctly, someone I know was sleeping with Judge Mary Clark when she was that age."

Casey opened her mouth in mock-offense, and Alex kissed it closed.

---

Once it was acknowledged between the two of them, Casey and Alex had an agreement-- neither one of them could fault the other for flirting with you. In fact, they even enjoyed watching each other be sweet to you. And it was pretty harmless, they thought. The moments got more frequent. Alex brought you coffee most mornings, sometimes talking about work, but equally as often, she tried to get to know you. She now knew that you loved baking and crochet and Charlotte Brontë, that you grew up with 6 siblings, you were raised in Oakland, that you'd gone to Stanford. It was like she was collecting pieces of information for an eventual file titled "Caroline Haley: interests." When you weren't in, she left you notes. She even bought you a mug warmer, knowing your tendency to get sucked into a case and forget about your drink.

At the same time, Casey now insisted that the two of you run together whenever you could. She would tease you, complain when you were going too fast. She once convinced you to go for an early Sunday run, and even held your hair back as you vomited in a bush (you neglected to tell her how hungover you were, and she'd forgotten how much 20-somethings could drink). She laughed at you, but she bought you sympathy pancakes to apologize.

While Casey and Alex knew they were flirting, you had no suspicions. You assumed they were just very kind, open people, (and they were, when they wanted to be) contrary to what Anderson and the other junior ADAs had to say. You thought they all must just be frustrated by the difficulty of the job. You were good at staying positive, even in terrible circumstances.

On a particularly unpleasant Friday, Alex watched you from the hallway as you took a phone call, waiting to come in and see if you'd like to have an after-work drink. She watched your eyes light up, saw you smile as wide as she'd ever seen, watched you excitedly shake your hand back and forth in the air and scrunch your nose. Maybe a boyfriend? she wondered as she clicked open the door to the junior ADAs office, shutting it while you packed up your things.

"Hey, Cabot," you said, "I know I'm leaving kind of early, sorry about that, did you need something?"

"It's 6:30. Technically, you're here late," she said as she watched you search your impressively messy desk for something. "But no, I don't need anything, I was actually going to ask if you wanted to get a drink with Casey and me and some other attorneys."

You stopped what you were doing and looked at her with the most accurate yet unintentional impression of a kitten that Alex had ever seen. "Any other day, I would absolutely love to," you told her, “But some people from my studio are going to a salsa night and my partner can actually come to this one. It's been months since we've both been free at the same time to dance together, so I really can't miss it. But please ask me next time if you still want to?"

Alex couldn't resist the way your eyes got big when you asked, the subtle pink in your cheeks and nose, you became impossible to refuse (not that she would want to). She told you that yes, of course, next time, only a little deflated to your knowledge. She has a partner.

"Speaking of," you said as your phone rang. You picked it up. "No, Ashley, your shoes are not in my bag. What would I do with them, babe? Check your old one. Or wear your old ones. Yeah, ok, see you at home." Watching you casually go back and forth with whoever was on the other end of the line was captivating. Ashley must be the partner. That you were both not single and not straight wasn't surprising, but it was a little disappointing if Alex was honest with herself.

"You dance?" She asked you.

"Mm-hmm," you hummed. "I was semi-pro in high school and college, actually. I just got back into teaching a year or so ago when Ashley moved to the city. That flake, god." You snapped your backpack shut (a classy leather affair, but a backpack nonetheless-- Casey adored it, Alex remembered) and changed your tone of voice. "Alex, you guys should come tonight!"

She let out a laugh. "I am as uncoordinated as a baby deer, Caroline."

"I doubt that," you said, rising from your desk. "Because you're good at basically everything. But you don't even have to dance if you don't want to. It's at this place," you wrote down the address of the club on a post-it and stuck it to Alex's cheek. "Live music, drinks, and you get to watch me do my favorite thing in the world, so. Yeah, you should come."

Alex, taken aback by your familiar demandingness (she'd noticed how warm you were with everyone, always professional, yes, but you put people at ease perfectly naturally with your unpracticed air), said "I'll see what Casey says," and watched you excitedly flutter out of the office, trailing close behind you.

---

Casey agreed to come dancing. She had also been a little hesitant, but when Alex described how sweetly you asked, how your face lit up when you talked about it, she wasn't in a position to say no. She and Alex sent their apology texts to Pippa, Rita, Sophie, Serena, and Gillian, receiving very characteristic replies.

Casey: Sorry, Al and I have to raincheck, Haley invited us out dancing???

Rita: Ha, have fun with the little energizer bunny, you two.

Pippa: Rita, be nice.

Rita: No.

Rita: I once saw her actually bounce down a hallway.

Serena: Alex Cabot dancing? I wish I was coming.

Alex: :( ouch, Ser.

Pippa: Have fun, you two.

Sophie: Wait, is something happening with Haley? Why do you guys never keep me in the loop?

Gillian: Aw :.(

Alex: Nothing is "happening," Rita's just cruel.

Rita: Haley's impressive, all I'm saying.

Casey. OK. Anyway, we're going to go somewhere we've never been to watch our junior colleague dance instead of having the same whisky as always with you people.

Pippa: 👯‍♂️

---

part two

[boxofbadaddiction]

Those Three Little Words

Fred Weasley x Reader

This story is inspired from a request of my F.R.I.E.N.D.S Themed Prompt List.

Prompts: 10 & 11

"Until I was 25, I thought the only response to 'I love you' was 'Oh, crap!'"/"Ah, Humour based on my pain. Aha-ha-ha."

Warnings: Swearing (per usual). Anxiety. Toxic Family. Emotional Trauma(?). Angsty. Post-War.

The War had been a sick wakeup call for Fred. He'd lived his life carefree and reckless, as he figured each day were a given. Mess up today it didn't matter because there was always tomorrow. He would strut through life as if he were invincible because, well, he always seemed that way. But death has a funny way of reshuffling ones priorities. A way of shedding light on what truly matters in your life.

Fred never considered himself as someone who lacked ambition. Frankly George and he never seemed to let anything hold them back. However, these days Fred could very well give Slytherins a run for their money - something George frequently teased him about. If there were something he wanted Merlin himself couldn't get in his way.

Not only in the case of work but his personal life as well. In love. And there was only one woman on Earth he loved. [Y/N].

He knew he loved her before the war. Before Umbridge drove him from Hogwarts in their final year. Before she left him.

It was only shortly prior, the boys epic departure, that [Y/N] had made the decision to call it quits. She knew their lives were destined to pull them in opposite directions and she never put much stock in long distance relationships. So, with a final kiss and a wish good luck, she walked out of his life. Albeit not completely.

After graduation she kept loosely in touch with the Twins, they had been friends after all, even visiting their shop on the off occasion when she could swing it. Although she was often far too busy to stay for long. Eventually she was relocated overseas for work, this officially terminating any of the limited contact had between the three.

The next time they would be in each others presence was the ill-fated battle.

[Y/N] had been keeping tabs on the events leading up to the fight. Even engaging in missions on behalf of the Order when necessary. She had proved quite a valuable asset. In the days before all Hell broke loose [Y/N] returned to Britian on 'urgent family matters' and of course she fought.

When Fred saw her again after so many years the rush of feelings that coursed through his body were nearly enough to knock him off balance. She was still so gorgeous. The [E/C] of her eyes reminding him just how deeply he loved her. Just how much he needed her. And he knew. Just knew she felt the same.

He saw it in the little things she did for him. Saw it in the tears of her eyes. In the way she broke down in his Hospital room when he finally woke, a fortnight, after his accident. Heard it in the tremble of her voice. In her 'I thought I lost you's. In the way she clung to him. He was so relieved she was okay and so happy to finally have her back in his life. Until suddenly...she wasn't anymore.

Recovery was Freds life now, but that wasn't hers. She was still needed elsewhere and as much as he wished she would stay he knew she couldn't. She still had a life left living. It were a miracle she managed to stay as long as she had. So...she left. And he wouldn't see her again for years. Six. To be exact.

Recovery had taken years from Fred. It was two and a half years before he could consider himself independent. After all that time wasted he wasn't about to let anything stand in his way. So when news carried to his ears that [Y/N] was back living in London, permanently, that after six years he could see her again, there was nothing holding him back.

In a second he'd apparated to her doorstep. Knocking on the withered wood door. Listening to the faint patter of approaching footsteps. Hearing the gentle click of the locks tumblers as they turned. Watching the steady swing of the door as it opened. Feeling the prick of burning tears behind his eyes as he stared back into her questioning gaze. Pulling her body into his as their lips collided. Relishing in the warmth that spread through his blood as she kissed back. Clung back. Loved him back. Everything he poured into her she gave right back. He swore right in that moment that he'd never let her go again. They'd wasted so much time already.

Over a year later the two could not have been deeper in love. She'd moved into the boys flat mere months after he appeared at her door. It's what Fred wanted, and Fred always gets what he wants.

Fred and Georges business had picked up quite quickly after the war. Fred insisted George begin work on the restorations while he recovered. Saying he wanted everything back in full swing by the time he was upright, to pick right back where he left off. George was sure he simply didn't fancy cleaning it himself and saw recovery as a pretty convenient excuse. Fred didn't deny his brothers claim.

They'd managed to open a second store in Hogsmead and were currently renovating the original store. Expanding the flat and lower levels. This saw the three residents temporarily relocating to the Burrow for a few days as the work was completed. Molly had insisted, saying the house were 'far too quiet' for her liking. Which was hard to believe as Ron and Hermione and Ginny and Harry all currently lived there. Of course Bill and Fleur, as well as Percy had all moved out ages ago, and Charlie was back living in Romania. Still, it beats paying accommodation elsewhere. And they couldn't deny that spending time back in their childhood home was enjoyable. It felt warm and safe and familiar, like the war had never happened and they were all just spending time together as a family.

As dinner approached on their third day home [Y/N] and Harry could be found helping prepare tonights meal, under the careful instruction of Mrs Weasley, while the rest sat comfortably within the sitting room fondly reminiscing their times spent together just like they were now.

The group were laughing haughtily at a certain memory George had recalled in which [Y/N] turned Rons entire bedroom hot pink with the Twins 'Everlasting Dye', after he thought it'd be funny to turn her hair a similar shade. Much like [Y/N]'s hair the dye hadn't faded for well over a fortnight as the Twins found the whole thing all too funny and refused them the instant remover.

"God, I love her." Fred smiled brightly at the memory, "I'm going to marry that woman." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Sure she likes you that much?" Ginny quipped.

"Certain, dear Sister." Ginny simply nodded a look of uncertainty on her face. "What's that look for?" "Nothing." "Ginny." "well it's just...she doesn't really say it much does she?" "'Course she does. What are you on about?" "I just don't think I've ever actually heard her say she loves you before." "It's not like you're 'round us 24/7 now is it?" Fred scoffed, shaking off his sisters comment.

George meanwhile was staring towards the ceiling, brows furrowed as he contemplated Ginnys words deeply before letting out a low "hmmp" as realisation struck.

"Oh, what now?" Fred rolled his attention toward his Twin. "Nothing it's just I can't think of a time I've heard her say it either." Ginny had a look of 'I told you so' blatantly obvious on her face while Ron and Hermione thought hard on the topic as well. Freds gaze shifted quickly between his gathered family.

"Oh, so what if you've never heard it. Point is I have. And I know she loves me so it doesn't matter. But if you all must! Here," he leant back in his chair calling into the kitchen "Hey, [Y/N/N]!" "Yeah, Freddie?" She walked toward him with a loving smile. "I love you" [Y/N]'s smile faded instantly as she raised a suspicious brow, "What'd you do?" "What!?" Fred asked shocked as the eavesdroppers giggled. "No. Nothing, really! I just wanted to tell you I love you." "Oh...well I know that" she smiled, kissing him softly. Fred gave her an expectant look as she stood back. "...what?" "you love me too, yeah?" "Of course I do." There was a determination behind her words. Almost as if she were insulted by his question, to which the answer were painstakingly obvious. She soothingly ran a hand through his hair, "I've got to get back in there and help your Mother before Harry burns everything." She joked, placing a final quick kiss to his lips. He watched her leave a giddy smile on his face before turning back to his nosey family.

"See. Told you." He laid back in his seat confidently. The group all shared tight lipped, awkward, smiles. "Oh, what?!" "It's just she didn't really say it, did she?" George spoke. "Yeah she did. I asked her and she said 'yes'. End of conversation." "But she didn't actually say the words; 'I love you'." Ginnys voice intervened. "She doesn't have to." "Shouldn't it be sort of automatic?" "Like you and Harry say it every time." He rolled his eyes. "Pretty much" Ginny nodded, earning an unconvinced scoff from her brother. "Here, watch."

Ginny mirrored Freds earlier movements, calling to the kitchen, "Hey, Harry!" "Yeah, Gin?" Harry came to his fiancès call. She smiled up at him sweetly, "I love you". Harry looked around the group a little uncomfortable and unsure but smiled nonetheless. "I love you too" he placed a quick kiss to her temple. "Right, that's all I wanted you can go now." Ginny turned back in her chair as Harry walked away very confused.

"Automatic." She gestured widely with her hands, a triumphant look on her face. "Oh piss off." Fred scowled. "Doesn't matter if she 'says the words' or not. I know she loves me. Doesn't bother me." "Good for you, Freddie." Ron spoke encouragingly. "So you're on my side?" "Absolutely!" "It wouldn't bother you if Hermione never-" "oh GOD no! She has to say the words. I need the reassurance." He looked up to his girlfriend, who in turn lovingly took his hand in hers.

"Alright. So it's a little strange. But I bet I can have her saying it before we leave." "In four days?" George questioned, sceptical. "Yep. I'll make her." "How romantic. With charm like that it's a wonder why she hasn't said it already." His Twin chuckled. "Why don't you just talk to her about it? Maybe there's a reason." Hermione piped. "Nah. My ways better." Fred shook his head, tapping his knees lightly as he thought.

And so began, what Fred would soon discover to be, the most difficult challenge he'd ever attempted.

It started out simply enough; with a few added 'I love you's here and there. Whether the moment called for it or not. Although after the war Fred had become notably more vocal in expressing his love towards family and friends, he kicked it up a notch in an attempt to coax those very words from the mouth of his partner. Quickly escalating to more grand and romantic gestures.

The first was a ridiculously large bouquet of vividly yellow roses. Moving onto a private picnic for two atop the Hill which rested behind the Burrow. At sunset he had dragged [Y/N] from the home to where he laid a blanket and candles, with soft music playing in the background, as well as having organised a platter of all their favourite foods. Ending the meal rather...intimately. During which he was sure to further praise her and whisper sweet, loving words in her ear. Telling her just how much he loved her.

His constant showering of affection had granted him plenty of appreciation in return. His words always being met with the usual "I do too"s and "Me too"s even a couple "Dittos" they always had, though he was yet to receive any "I love you"s. Which hadn't bothered him before, but now was proving to be mildly infuriating and very disheartening, really.

Failure wasn't something Fred was used to anymore. To think he was unable to get his long term partner to say those three little words was quickly making him uncomfortable.

By the fourth and final morning, since setting himself this little challenge, Fred was spent. He was sure he'd tried everything. Grand gestures. Romantic dates. Surprise kisses. Great sex. He had even seriously considered proposing, as a last resort. But these were not the circumstances in which he wanted to do so under, when he did he wanted it to be perfect. Maybe the Imperius - NO! no. Too drastic.

Why was nothing working? Suddenly Ginnys amusing quip wasn't so funny anymore and struck a vein far too close to home. Was it possible he was wrong and she simply didn't feel the same way?

All manner of sickeningly worrisome thoughts began to flood through his mind as he lay awake. He starred at the woman he loved so fiercely, so passionately, he could swear she were the only reason his heart kept bleeding.

He watched her as she slept peacefully, tucked tight against his chest, whilst he absent-mindedly stroked her hair, contemplating a reality which he much rather never come true. One in which she didn't love him.

He used to be so sure but now...now he was terrified. He'd never thought much on what form his Boggart would assume if he ever were to face one. He knew in this moment though that is exactly what shape it would take. Her.

She'd approach him slowly. An evil grin and amused brow raised upon her features. She'd tell him what a fool he was. How stupid he was to ever think a woman like her could love a boy like him. That she only stayed with him out of pity. How humiliated and desperate he seemed that day on her doorstep. How it would have been better if he had just given up, never fought to survive after the explosion. How much better it'd have been if he just died in War. She could have found real love, lived a happy life away from the embarrassing one she led with him in it.

Tears burned red in the whites of his eyes as his chest shuddered with every quickened and panicking breath he took. His heart thundering in his ears as the room began to spin. He was suffocating. Sweat streamed down his temples. He had to get out. Escape.

Sliding as quickly and carefully as he could from beneath the covers without disturbing the sleeping woman in his bed, he took for the shower. Praying the steam would unfog his mind. That the water would wash away his doubts and anxiety.

The whole time he tried to rationalise why [Y/N] wouldn't say the words. Reassuring himself that it didn't matter. Shouldn't matter. He left the bathroom long after the water had run cold feeling only moderately better than when he'd entered. At least now he had a modicum of control over his body. His emotions on the other hand...

He slowly descended the steps of his childhood home, face emotionless, to the sound of light chatter and clinking of various dishes. Everyone was already gathered around the table eating breakfast.

"Ah, there you are!" George announced as Fred entered the kitchen, "clean now are we? Thought you'd must have drowned in there." He joked. Fred offered a light chuckle and forced smile as he sat himself between his Twin and partner. "What's this the wake then?"

[Y/N] leant into his side, placing a kiss to his cheek as her hand traced circles on his lower back. "Morning, Hun" she murmured tenderly, chin resting against his shoulder as she peered up at him. He didn't look at her, simply humming in response. His hand briefly came to squeeze her thigh before quickly retracting. This did little to evoke a sense of ease within his significant other.

Over the eighteen months they'd shared together [Y/N] had long since become accustomed to his dramatic morning greetings. Usually, as they'd wake up together, it'd involve him peppering her face and neck in countless kisses before joining George for breakfast. On days when they'd wake to find themselves alone under the covers, the other having obviously awoke long ago, he'd surprise her. Lifting her off her feet and spinning her through the air then, placing her back down, kissing her deeply.

The only times she'd seen him like this were nights when his dreams had been plagued with flashbacks from the Battle. She assumed he'd slept peacefully. He hadn't had any nightmares in months and would usually, unintentionally, wake her during them. "You okay, Freddie?" "Yeah."

Totally convincing.

The rest of the day Fred was cold. To everyone but [Y/N] especially. He was having difficulty even looking at her. She'd tried talking with him but he insisted there was nothing the matter. Didn't keep her from worrying.

After dinner everyone moved into the lounge, engaging in various bits of conversation. Everyone aside from Fred. No one was sure when he'd disappeared but his absence was noted nonetheless. [Y/N] was the one to search for him. Found standing within the garden over looking the sunset.

She could see the discontent held in his body, the way he stood so rigid. The hollow expression on his features, completely devoid of any emotion. It hurt her seeing him this way.

"Hey, You." She spoke hesitantly. Fred turned at the sound of her voice. Watching her standing tentatively before him as if unsure whether or not her presence was welcome. "Hey, You" he smiled sadly back, his frame visibly relaxing at the sight of her. "We're all missing you in there. What are you doing out here all by your lonesome?" [Y/N] said softly as she approached him, arms snaking around his waist. His hands fell to her lower back and pulled her into his body ever more so. "Just needed a bit of quiet to think" "'Think', huh?" He hummed in response. "That's never good" she grinned making him laugh lightly. "No, it isn't." He placed a slow kiss to her lips.

Breaking it shortly after as he teased, "So, you missed me?" "Every second you're not by my side I do." He rested his forehead against hers, their eyes falling shut contently. Fred exhaled comfortably,"I love you" "I do too" [Y/N] replied. "What love you?" Fred straightened himself with a cheeky expression on his face which was mirrored on that of his partners. "Stop it." "I'm serious." "You know what I mean" "Do I?".

[Y/N] had another quip ready on the tip of her tongue until noticing that cheery look he held had vanished and they were no longer standing in one anothers embrace. Her face dropped at the sight if a completely serious Fred Weasley stood in front of her. Awaiting the answer to a question she didn't fully understand. "Whats gotten into you?" She took a step toward him, to which, he took one back. "Do you love me?" "Of course I do!" "Then why don't you say it?" "I don't know what you're -" "you never say it." "I just did." "No, you agreed to a question I asked." "It's the same thing." "It's not."

The two were practically talking on top of one another. "Just...say it." He took a step towards her, to which, she took one back. "If I say it now it'll be forced and it may as well not mean anything." "Why can't you just say it!?" He snapped, more asking himself the question than her. But he needed to ask. He wasn't yelling at her but a part of [Y/N] wished he would. "I know you love me. Or at least I thought I did. I just...I need to hear you say it because sometimes I can't help but wonder - please just. Say it." Staring into her eye's pleadingly, hers stared right back in apology. "Fred..." "Forget it." He turned from her. "Fred, baby" her hand reached for his shoulder as his own ran through his hair in frustration whilst his jaw clenched. "I can't. I can't be near you right now." He shook his head, storming off towards the Hill. Ignoring her frantic, begging calls.

[Y/N] stood rooted to the spot from shock. This was one of the first fights the pair had had, and she wasn't even sure what brought it on. There'd been minor squabbles between them out of stress from work or other things but never something like this. They had such an open relationship it never got to this point, any concerns either held was always voiced and discussed. Why was this time different?

As she watched his figure slowly disappear amongst the dark as night was soon to fall, she made her decision. This time wasn't going to be different. They were going to talk about it whether he cared to or not. Even if that meant her admitting somethings she'd very much hoped never have to. So, she set off after him.

Fred stood with his back against the trunk of an old tree which grew tall on top the Hill. One hand in his pocket as the other ran his fingers over the markings carved into it's wood by the Weasley family. One engraving in particular. A relatively fresh one where he had carved [Y/N]s name next to his own last Christmas to "officially" mark her as apart of the family.

He recalled the moment vividly. How she questioned his actions, wondering if he'll still love her the same 'down the road', not to regret this decision. "Nah, you're right. I won't love you the same. I'll love you more." He'd said. "But the real question is; will you love me, or are you just going to break my heart?" To be honest. He truly hadn't expected the latter.

He was drawn from his thoughts by the approaching sound of footsteps. Turning his head he rolled his eyes upon realising it was her. "Not now." He growled. "Yes now." She shot back at him standing firm in place.

She'd planned a whole monologue on the walk to him but now that she was here, eyes meeting his, she hadn't a damn clue what to say.

"Until I was 25, I thought the only response to 'I love you' was 'oh, crap!'" She blurted out. Fred looked at her quizzically as the words settled in the air. [Y/N]'s eyes shut for a moment, kicking herself. That wasn't how she intended for the conversation to go. "I'm-I can't say the words" she began again to which Fred scoffed. "Yeah. I gathered that much." "Fred, just shut the fuck up, and listen to me!" Her stare shot daggers into the boy and he found his attention unwavering from her words.

"I didn't have a normal upbringing. I didn't get what you have. I came from a family where love was a weapon. A tool for manipulation. Something that was withheld until you were useful. Something used to excuse shitty behaviour. I didn't get the warm Christmases and intimacy you got. Before you I wasn't sure I knew what love was. My whole life had been cold. Then when you showed up at my door that day it was like hot blood began pumping through my body for the first time. You felt like life when my whole existence has been death. That's when I knew I couldn't live without you. When I knew that I...I can't say it. The words. But not just to you, I can't say them to anyone. It feels unnatural like there's a rope tied around my throat and it suffocates me. And it kills me a little bit. To look into your eyes and know that I - that I still can't - may never ... fuck. I-" [Y/N]s hand came to cover her eyes as tears fell and heartbroken sobs escaped her body.

Fred reacted on instinct, by her side in a second, pulling her into his chest. A hand gripped her back as the other fisted into her hair. "I'm sorry" she cried as he soothed her.

Fred was fighting sobs of his own, feeling as her body shudder against his and she clung to him for support. Because if she didn't her knees would buckle and she'd fall.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. I-I had no idea this was...look at me." He held her shoulders taking half a step back to look at her. "I don't care if you never say the words." "But then why-" "I listened to the opinions of four prats who had no business sticking their noses in our relationship." [Y/N] chuckled sadly, wiping tears from her cheeks. "Before they said anything I honestly hadn't noticed because I knew, I know you love me. You don't have to tell me because you show me. It's in your kiss. In your eyes. Your laugh. Your nostrils as they flare when you yell at me after successfully pissing you off. Never be sorry. I shouldn't have gotten so worked up over nothing. Okay?" [Y/N] nodded in response, unable to form a sentence. Smiling sweetly his hand came to caress below her jaw."I love you." "Now you're just rubbing it in." Fred laughed, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her lips.

He's pulling away before [Y/N]s pulling him back by the collar of his shirt for a deep and passionate one. Soon breaking in dire need for air.

Her chest is heaving as she catches her breath. His eyes fall shut, pressing his head against hers gently. [Y/N]s eyes are searching his face. Why can't she just tell him? The words, those three stupid little words, are right there tearing at her throat. Wanting to be said. This is real. He is not her parents, not her toxic 'family'. He's Fred. Sweet, caring Fred. Her one and only. He's different.

She swallows hard, mouth going dry, as that familiar tightening takes hold. Trying desperately to rid herself of that strangling sensation that plagues her a trillion times a day. She's staring at him, panic coursing through her bloodstream. Her eyes clench shut as she tries to muster as much strength as she can. "I-" the words are right there. Her voice barely a whisper as she fights that rope. "I love you." [Y/N] gasps for air as a knot in the rope snaps. Eyes widening as her chest shudders before she's smiling. Fresh tears falling in relief and joy.

Fred's eyes spring open, gawking. Did she just...is he-did he imagine that? No. There's no way. "You...you-" "I love you." Her voice louder this time, more assured as a second knot snaps. He doesn't know how to react. Body and mind still processing.

Soon though he's grinning like a madman, spinning her in his arms, feeling happier than he thought possible. Placing her back on the ground both hands cup her face as his lips crash into hers.

They stay like that for a while, in one anothers arms. [Y/N]s kissing him tenderly as she pulls back to whisper the words once more, "I love you." He smiles cockily down at her before his expression shifts to one of mock surprise. "Oh, crap!" he laughs as [Y/N] rolls her eyes. "Ah, Humour based on my pain. Aha-ha-ha. You're such a bastard." She turns to walk off but he grabs her arm. Spinning her back against his chest as his other hand comes to the nape of her neck.

"Not so fast, Princess." He licks his lips smirking, voice low "say it again." She bites her lip suppressing a wide smile. "I love you." He places one final kiss before a wicked grin spreads over his face and he's quickly throwing her over his shoulder.

"Come on, love!" He starts running for the Burrow. "FRED!" [Y/N] squeals. "No time to waste! I told them I'd have to saying it before we leave." "You...oh my god, FRED! Did you place a bet on me!? You absolute GIT!"

"Love you too, sweetheart."

[reirashi]

Prompt: "You promised you wouldn't hurt anyone if I came with you willingly to heal your friend!" Kakasaku please! (and if you're okay with it, maybe Kakashi is the one abducting Sakura to heal Obito...? I wasn't sure if abduction counted as 'forced') Thank you!!

Sorry for the delay! This is set after the fourth great war, assuming Obito’s body is somewhere to be found.

Chrysalis

Kakashi had been different recently. Changed. Sakura hadn’t paid specific attention to it till their team meeting where Kakashi had zoned out completely. Normally he was never an active participator in conversation, but he was always present. The small crinkling of his eye when he heard something funny, or the furrow in his brow when Naruto plunged on about Sasuke. But this time was different. He was absent somehow, a vague distance in his eyes.

Nobody else noticed and somehow that bothered her more.

So, on that fateful night, when Kakashi crawled through her window, shrouded in the darkness and rain, Sakura was surprised but not that surprised.

More pissed off than anything that he had taken down three of her potted plants in his ungraceful manoeuvre.

…And slightly wishing she were dressed better than her ratty shorts and cropped t-shirt, no bra and tub of chocolate ice-cream shamelessly half-eaten in hand.

“Kakashi!” She exclaimed aghast and chastising all in one.

Her outrage fell on deaf ears and all she heard was the broken rasp as he called her voice, “Sakura,” agonised and conflicted.

“What- What’s wrong sensei?” Suddenly, her motherly concern overtook every other self-conscious thought, and she plonked the tub on the table and walked over to him hands outstretched ready to help.

But he turned away from her caring gaze, instinctively shied away from her.

“You have to come with me.” Was all he said and not a word more, eyes still glued to her pink carpet.

“Sensei, what do you mean? Where to?” She added when he offered no further information, her concern growing to panic.

“I-” he stopped, swallowing thickly. Sakura had never heard him hesitate in her life. “You need to heal someone.”

Sakura exhaled in a huff of relief, “Of course Sensei. Who? Actually, never mind, where are they? Let’s bring them to the hospital, or are they already there?”

Immediately tying her hair in a messy bun, and walking around her apartment looking for the all the right items to make her decent, she didn’t notice Kakashi’s stillness till she was hopping back through her kitchen, looking for her other shoe.

“Sensei what is it?”

He said nothing so she stopped her manic dressing and looked at him, but his head was turned away.

“Sensei,” she repeated, a hardness to her voice.

“We can’t bring them to the hospital. We have to go to them.”

“Uh okay, then we’ll have to stop by the hokage tower for the permission slip-” she paused thinking aloud, “Actually we might have to stop by Kotetsu’s office direct since it’s probably after hours.”

“Sakura.” Kakashi raised his head for the first time since arriving, and in his eyes she saw all the thunder and darkness he had brought in from the outside. “We are not getting permission.”

“But Sensei-”

“Pack your things. We are leaving now.”

Crossing her arms across her chest, Sakura’s expression was tight as she replied, “Do I have a choice?”

He said nothing, but his dark expression said it all.

“Fine.” Was all she said, as she stormed off into her room and threw her mission and medic items into her bag, grabbing a few extra weapons and body-guards just in case.

When she returned to her living room, Kakashi was standing ready to leave, her potted plants tidied and moved aside, and her window locked.

“How do we even-” Sakura questioned bitterly, but Kakashi interrupted her.

“Follow me.”

In the next day or so the pair did nothing but travel in absolute silence. Sakura, though wanting to bridge the uncomfortable gap, struggled to squash her hurt pride at Kakashi’s lack of trusting her with information. Eventually though, the silence grew too much, and just as Sakura had resolved to break it with some inane topic, her words morphed into a scream as she plunged from the height of the tree that had been her footfall, her shoes - unsuitable for this terrain - how was she to know! - squealing against the wet bark as she slipped.

Strong fingers wrapped around her wrist, catching her mid-fall. Though he had been a good few trees ahead of her Kakashi had got to her quick. Silently he pulled her up, sliding a hand around her back and pulling her up by the waist once she was close enough.

The bark was thin and covered in wet moss. Kakashi held absolutely still to prevent them tumbling over the edge. Grabbing onto his vest to steady herself, her eyes met with Kakashi’s for the first time that night.

There was a sadness she wished to soothe away, her fingers twitching in response. Kakashi too, did not pull away like usual, he held on a beat longer than he normally would have.

Then, in the blink of an eye the walls were up again, and instead of the inches between them there was a chasm.

In one step he had turned away and leaped to the next branch, leading the way, but not before a few unexpected words of reassurance slipped out, “We’re almost there”.

Sure enough, half a mile or so later, Kakashi slowed down before dropping silently to the ground below. The ground was wet and mossy, little light filtered through the thick canopy of trees overhead.

Kakashi led them to a large overgrown fern, twice Sakura’s height. He reached in and peeled apart the two walls of leaves which camouflaged some kind of entrance. They stepped inside to a dark, eerily silent space. Sakura couldn’t tell if it was a cave or a hollowed out tree.

Kakashi stopped wordlessly at the far end of the circular space, placing his hand gently onto what looking like a sort of ledge. Sakura walked slowly closer till she was by his side, her footsteps squelching in the wet mud. As she passed around the broad cover of Kakashi’s back her eyes laid upon what wasn’t a ledge but some sort of glass coffin.

The gasp got caught in her throat as she realised it wasn’t glass but some kind of membrane. She reached out her fingers to touch it, but a hand clamped down on her wrist stopping her fingers just before they touched.

“It’ll break.”

“W-who set this up?”

“I don’t know.”

“But you are going to make it work.” There was a long pause after which he turned around and walked out the small space, announcing in a low voice, “I’m going to get firewood, get started.”

Sakura stared at the coffin in disbelief, sending chakra to her fingers to feel it out. She shuddered on first contact, immediately understanding who and what was inside.

She turned around and sprinted out the enclosure, panting like she couldn’t breathe. Once outside she used her chakra to get some indication as to how far Kakashi had gone and took off running in the opposite direction.

She barely made it three miles before she skidded to a stop, almost colliding face-first with an anbu mask. She hesitated confused, not sure in their eyes which side she was on.

“Are you here for me? Can you help?” Sakura asked in a shaky voice.

The woman paused, caught off-guard by the Godaime’s apprentices’ words.

“Haruno-sama, you left the village without permission early this morning. Was this against your will?”

It was Sakura’s turn to pause. Would this be selling Kakashi out?

“Well...”

She didn’t have time to debate her principles because Kakashi appeared behind the woman, slick as a shadow and with a speedy chop she was at their feet like a sack of potatoes.

When Sakura met Kakashi’s eyes there was a darkness she couldn’t quite make out.

“Okay, okay.” Laughing nervously, Sakura held up her hands in resignation. “I’ll come help heal your friend, just... just don’t hurt anyone else.”

Kakashi was silent but Sakura couldn’t take his stony exterior and turned away, walking stiffly back the way she had come.

A few paces in they froze as another anbu member appeared from the trees and Sakura opened her mouth to explain holding her hands up placatingly, but before she had a chance the man’s eyes went wide and foam from his mouth escaped the bottom of his mask, before he hit the ground with a thud.

Sakura shuddered as the thick, oppressive wave of a genjustu passed over her.

Kakashi without his Sharingan was just as powerful and terrifying as he was with.

But the fear lasted only a few second as she regained courage and spun around, slamming her fists on her teacher’s chest.

And from Sakura that shit actually hurt.

“You promised you wouldn’t hurt anyone!”

“I promised no such thing.” He hissed in a low voice.

Sakura turned away angrily, realising he was correct, but that only fuelled her anger at him. Because she had expected the answer to her earlier request to be a given.

“Huh, that’s funny,” she scoffed mirthlessly, “I guess I mistook you for the Kakashi that actually gave a fuck and didn’t even need to be asked.”

Launching into a sprint, Sakura was back at the enclosure in a few minutes, her extra speed fuelled by anger and frustration. Kakashi silently kept up with her, wordless as he entered behind her.

Glowing with a deep green like the colour of her eyes, Sakura drew her hands across the top of the coffin, breathing deeply as she tried to concentrate and calm her emotions.

It could have been hours or mere minutes that Sakura stood there pulling her chakra across the vessel and exploring deep inside with Kakashi a silent protective or restrictive - whichever way you looked at it - presence behind her.

After analysing the structure Sakura began to prod, slipping beneath the skin and using her energy to pull the tissue together and stitch the seams.

A firm hand on her shoulder shocked Sakura out of concentration, and she extricated herself from the inner view of the tissue she hand been focusing on and looked over her shoulder.

Kakashi was watching her with a concerned look on his face. The same Kakashi as always. Only then did she realise the sweat dripping down her face and soaking the small of her back. The breath seemed to leave her the second she stopped the flow of chakra to her hands, and she slumped forward, body heading for the ground.

Kakashi caught her against himself, holding her still while she caught her breath. Eventually when it became apparent Sakura wouldn’t be moving any further, he slipped his arms around her waist and hauled her up, moving her to the other side of the enclosure where he had at some point, laid out tarp and blankets as a makeshift bed. It was clear he had visited here more than once, and over a long period of time too.

It carried on like a routine, for several days Sakura pushed herself to the absolute brink of exhaustion whilst she healed. Kakashi said nothing, he knew her well enough to know when Sakura became determined like this there was no stopping her. All he could contribute in his silence, was support in the way of catching her when she fell and putting her to rest, waking her after a few hours and guiding her half asleep to eat, before she fell asleep, woke up and repeated the cycle again.

Guilt clawed at his heart like a cancer and the longer it went on, the deeper their silence became.

Till one night, Sakura who had aside from that first experience, been stopping of her own volition, fainted and Kakashi who had been nearby just barely made it to catch her. He gently laid her down onto the bedding but was surprised as his fingers brushed her skin. She was burning up. Ripping his gloves off and pushing her hair from her face, he pressed the back of his palm against her forehead, cursing under his breath at the heat of her skin.

Her body convulsed slightly, and he noticed she was shivering, sweat had been pouring out of her skin and now her wet clothes were sticking to her body, causing her to tremble from the cold. Hesitating he pulled back the cover, and carefully lifted her soaked shirt over her head, rapidly pulling off his flack jacket and long sleeve shirt. Taking great care not to jostle her too much, he pulled his long sleeve top over her, aching at how the fabric drowned her small frame.

His hands stopped at her exposed legs, fingers lingering at the waist band to her skirt and shorts. With light touches he could feel their dampness but was battling with himself on what to do. Eventually he withdrew his hands, rummaging instead for the cloak they had worn during their travels and wrapping it around her body tightly.

Appraising her still shivering form, Kakashi clad only in his sleeveless mask-attached under-top, climbed under the thin blanket, and settled next to his student. Awkward at first, he agonised over how to position himself, before eventually he managed to shift her onto her side and he his, turning over to envelop her, resting her head against his chest, and his legs tangled with hers.

He thought he would never sleep that night. From the worry, the stress and mostly the guilt.

Surprisingly however he was out like a light. It seemed with Sakura firmly tucked in his arms, he finally had the mental peace to close his eyes and enter a state of deep sleep for the first time in days.

---------

Sakura awoke to a persistent thudding against her ear. Thinking she had slept too heavily on one side, she shifted to try roll over, only to find her body pinned in place. Opening her eyes, she was surprised to find her view blocked, that combined with the familiar scent of rain which she associated with her Sensei, Sakura looked up in surprise to find it was Kakashi who was pinning her.

Craning her neck upwards, her surprise quickly dissipated when she saw the look on Kakashi’s face. For days he had slept beside her, and while she had been borderline comatose most of the time, whenever she had woken briefly in the night, the look on Kakashi’s face always bothered on her.

Now was different. He seemed almost peaceful. His breathing steady and even, his eyebrows relaxed, his mouth...

Without thinking twice Sakura’s fingers crept up, carefully pinching the edge of the mask.

Slowly she inched the material down, anticipating some form of horrific revelation or divine retribution as she carried out what felt like borderline sacrilege. Instead, she was incredibly surprised at the completely normal soft, pink, top lip that appeared, contrasted by the dark of the mask as it cinched in the gap between his lips.

Sakura’s heart thudded in her chest, not quite wanting to admit to herself why her current view made her feel this way.

Glancing surreptitiously up at Kakashi before she made the final tug to reveal the rest of his no doubt completely normal and annoyingly handsome face, Sakura startled when her eyes met slate grey ones, half covered by long lashes.

Frozen like a delinquent caught in the middle of a crime, Kakashi moved so quick she didn’t have a chance to worry about being reprimanded. His eyes were wide with sudden awareness and swiftly he switched their positions, rolling Sakura onto her back so he could assess her with wide eyes.

Sakura could hardly breathe when, pushing his forehead protector and fringe out of the way, Kakashi leaned over and pressed his forehead against hers, checking her temperature.

She felt his warm breath across her cheeks as he sighed deeply in relief, realising belatedly she only felt it because she had pulled his mask half-off. Distracted by the fact, and with his face in better view on top of her, Sakura couldn’t stop herself reaching up and slipping her finger back into the edge.

Long fingers curled around her wrist stopped her, and she found her hand pinned above her head before she knew it. A smirk found its way onto her face. There were many things she couldn’t keep up with her teammates on, but competitiveness was not one of them. She stretched up across the short distance between them, tilting her head and daringly grabbing the edge of the mask between her teeth.

Even Kakashi didn’t know how to react, frozen as he was.

Pinching and pulling the material, she stopped when her lips brushed against his warm ones, the gravity of their closeness finally sinking in. Her teeth parted and the material slipped from between them, her lips still barely against his.

She didn’t know who started it. If she bridged that hairsbreadth gap or if he pushed down first, their slightly parted lips finally pressed together. It was gentle at first, his eyes closed as he seemed to sigh in almost relief, before the life returned to his eyes. Kakashi was back. The same Kakashi that was fire and fangs and cutting intelligence on the battlefield was viciously moving his lips against hers, heavy breaths barely escaping in between, before his hand not pinning her wrist grabbed her jaw and held it tight, coaxing it open. His tongue slipped in, hot and wet and then he froze. Almost as if he remembered what he was and who he was with.

He pulled back, his lips not wanting to separate from her swollen ones, but he only made it a handspan away from her before he found himself thrown sideways, flipped onto his back and pinned down by his student.

Sakura smirked darkly, she recognised his reaction, knew what he would do, and knew she wouldn’t let it happen. He wasn’t allowed to retreat now and act like nothing had happened. Not after that.

Pressing her lithe body against his, she leaned down and gently brushed her lips against his, parting them only to draw her tongue across his lower lip before she pressed down in a fierce kiss. He resisted valiantly for all of ten seconds, before his lips parted, his mouth opened, and he gasped as he let her in. Strong hands grasped the thighs straddling his wait, squeezing the soft flesh as his mouth was ravaged. Unable to take inactivity anymore, one hand reached up and around her back, threading his fingers in her soft hair and tilting her head to the side whilst he moved his mouth down, biting her bottom lip, nipping along her jaw, drawing a wet trail down to her neck where his teeth pinched sharply before sucking on the reddened skin.

It seemed to be a weak spot for Sakura as a shaky exhale mixed with a soft moan escaped her. She craned her neck further to the side to give him better access, whilst her body naturally melded closer against his, her hips rubbing against his and oh sweet heavens did she just grind against her sensei’s-

Sakura’s thought process was interrupted as her body lilted to the side and was overtaken with a numbness and tingling that was most definitely not pleasure.

“Kaka-” Sakura gasped; the light-headed sensation combined with Kakashi assaulting her neck was proving too much to think around.

Clumsily she managed to extricate one hand from his chest and slide it up to her neck where she all but slapped it across his face. For a moment Kakashi hadn’t caught up and his tongue slid against her hand and between her fingers and oh my god that’s way sexier than it has any right to be and maybe it’ll be ok if I let him keep going and pass out like this...

But it was too late, Kakashi had caught up and awareness was bright in his eyes though understandably not yet down below. He leaned up on his elbows, his hands immediately circling her face, tilting her head towards him so he could assess her.

“M’ok,” Sakura mumbled, dropping her head against the palms holding her cheeks. “Just a bit faint,” she sighed breathlessly.

“Sakura.” His voice was thick with emotion and rough around the edges in a way she had never heard it before. “I’m so-”

Sakura interrupted him, fingers covering his mouth as she rested her head more fully on his shoulder, her voice muffled by his body, “Don’t. It was me too.”

He was silent as he manoeuvred her body to be more comfortable on him, but Sakura could practically hear his guilt and worry.

“Just... help feed me some water.” Kakashi sat them both carefully up, bringing the canteen to her lips and guiding her to drink. Sakura couldn’t help but marvel at the strangeness of it, they had gone from anger on her part and silence on his end, to passionately making out, with no discussions or resolution of conflict in between. The weirdest thing of all was how natural it had been. And how much she hadn’t wanted it to end. Sakura had no idea she had such inclinations towards Kakashi till now. Sure, there had been the odd thought here and there, but it had never been something manifestable in reality. Judging from the deep, bewildered concentration on Kakashi’s face, it seemed he felt the same way. Behind his upfront concern for her, it seemed he too was contemplating what had just happened and why they had reacted the way they had.

Granted, she was still very much cradled in his lap with her head resting on his shoulder, so maybe now really wasn’t the time for such musings.

Sakura didn’t move till she felt truly stable and ready and Kakashi didn’t hurry her either. A part of her feared the distance he would put between them the second she was on her feet, and so she revelled in the attention as he carefully helped her sip water and supported her sluggish body against his own. After the last week of painful awkwardness and distance between them, this was a welcome excuse for closeness, and Sakura enjoyed it so much she had to hold herself back from snuggling against his neck and chest.

Eventually she felt stable enough to raise her head, and she did so tentatively, pausing for a moment whilst the ringing in her ears passed. Nodding to herself once, she looked up at Kakashi who had been watching her intently.

“Help me up.”

Wordlessly he slipped his hands around her slim waist as he crouched and gradually brought himself into a standing position, carefully bringing her with him.

Once up, she leaned heavily against him as the blood rushed through her body, and while she waited for the sensation to settle Sakura was reminded of Kakashi’s tall, lean form as she pressed against him. Clad only in his undershirt, his muscles stood out through the thin material, his naked arms even more so.

Since when did Kakashi get so hot? Or more like why has it taken me so long to notice!

Sakura sighed at the blindness of her youth, wasted away on trivial teenage boys that never returned her affection or valued her abilities.

And yet here was someone who valued her enough to kidnap her and use her for a top-secret project which he had asked of no one else. To Sakura, who had always been kept in the dark, always the last to know, she felt almost honoured by the inclusion, if it hadn’t been shrouded in such secrecy.

Returning to the matter at hand, Sakura slowly stepped away from Kakashi and towards the chrysalis, her fingers gently stretching out. A firm hand around her wrist stopped her and Sakura looked up at Kakashi who bore an angered, agonised expression.

“That’s enough!” He bit out between clenched teeth, and Sakura could tell he was angrier at himself for making her do this than he was with her for wanting to continue.

Sakura smiled softly, turning her wrist around and slipping her hand into his. Gently she turned his hand over so her palm lay atop his.

“It is.” Sakura began in a quiet voice. “It’s enough. This is the best I can do; the rest is down to nature and him to finish the process.” Sakura looked at Kakashi meaningfully, spreading the glow of chakra through both their hands so he could see what she saw too.

“I’m sure you knew this already when you bought him to such a place, but this chrysalis heals at its own rate, we cannot control it. I’ve repaired the structural damage to the organic form of the capsule and connected his body to it, so it should start to work now.”

Kakashi’s eyes were tight as she continued, glistening from the reflected light of her chakra. “It could take months, years or even decades for it to draw from nature all the energy it needs and naturally heal his body. Now there is nothing more we can do.”

“I know.” As Sakura had thought Kakashi did understand the workings of the chrysalis, and if it wasn’t Kakashi then she would be surprised he was willing to wait and even miss the revival of his friend. As it were, she knew all it really matter to him was that he lived eventually, be it now or in many years, that one day he would get to live the normal life they had, and that he had missed out on.

Kakashi’s voice was quiet as he spoke, withdrawing his hand from beneath hers.

“Thank you, Sakura.” His head was low and he wouldn’t meet her eyes. Sakura placed her fingertips on the edge of his jaw, the dim light casting shadows on his handsome, distraught face.

“If you had just asked, I would have done it. If you had just told me from the start.”

“I know.” Kakashi replied, voice low.

A slow smile spread across her face as she drew closer to him, speaking his true intentions aloud, “But you didn’t ask because if we were caught, you didn’t want me to be held accountable.”

“Oh Kakashi.”

Kakashi looked away, swallowing thickly, he replied, “I’m sorry Sakura. For everything.”

Slipping her hands around his waist, she hugged him tightly until he put his arms around her. Drawing back slightly she touched his face delicately, her expression one of deep empathy.

“I am so sorry for you Kakashi, for everything you went through, and for dealing with this alone.”

It was the first time anyone had ever acknowledged Kakashi’s losses, even months after the war was finished and over, due to his laidback disposition no one ever realised how much he had suffered, how much he had lost.

With a fierceness she wasn’t expecting, Kakashi returned her hug tightly, burying his face in her hair, his tall form trembling. Sakura rubbed his back soothingly, returning the embrace with as much strength as she could muster, feeling like it was only her arms holding the pieces of this man together.

Eventually he pulled back, pressing his forehead against Sakura’s, he whispered a thanks against her lips before he drew away.

Placing a hand on the chrysalis Kakashi closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and uttered, “Goodbye Obito,” before turning away.

Within minutes they were packing their stuff and clearing away their bedding, ready to leave.

Suddenly Sakura froze, a very obvious realisation dawning.

“Did-did you change me?”

Kakashi rolled his eyes at her, “That’s what your worried about?”

Considering this for a moment, Sakura conceded with a shrug, “fair point,” and returned to packing.

The journey back to Konoha was far less stressful and they took it at a relaxed, sedate pace; though a knot of anxiety did sit in the pit of Sakura’s stomach at what would happen upon their return.

“Hokage-sama!”

Sakura snapped her neck around at the sound, searching for the voice and its direction which seemed to be them?

“Hokage!?” Sakura turned incredulously towards Kakashi.

It all made sense. He wanted to square of all his debts before taking on the heavy title of hokage, which had been his teammates dream.

Sakura smiled to herself, shaking her head in disbelief, as she went over to the desk to sign her name in for leaving and returning, then quietly snuck away leaving Kakashi to deal with Shikamaru’s badgering. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Kakashi, head slightly bowed as he sheepishly apologised and offered a half-hearted explanation.

She made it only a block away before she was pulled into a secluded area between buildings, and before she could yelp in surprise Kakashi’s familiar face came into view. She opened her mouth to protest, a million questions on her lips, but closed it, knowing Kakashi would explain when he was ready or knowing him probably never.

As she stared silently at him for those few seconds, she struggled to decipher his expression. It was… soft almost?

Kakashi’s gloved hands circled her face, the warm tips of his fingers brushing her cheekbones. Her eyes fell to his lips, though she could not see them as he leaned close and whispered in low voice, slightly rough around the edges, “Thank you”.

She felt the gentle press of his warm lips against her forehead, lingering only for a moment extra, before she looked up and he was gone in a swirl of leaves.

Sakura chuckled to herself, the madness of the past few days starting to settle in as was the now glaring fact that she apparently had a massive crush on not only her Sensei, but also her village’s hokage.

Well, she shrugged to herself in thought as she continued the trek back to her apartment, at the very least he probably has a crush on me too.

[therainroguefanfiction]

⁂ Hero (NCT Dreamies)

Genre: Comedy, Fluff, Friendship ☁

Word Count: 2,041 ☁

Pairing: Reader, Dreamies ☁

World: NCT Dream ☁

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You’ve been working for SM Entertainment for the past five years and you absolutely hated it. Having friends that worked at other companies made you realize early on that SM was a horrible company to work for. All they cared about was money. They treated their employees like trash and, in turn, the employees treated the idols like trash.

The foreign idols had it the hardest, in your opinion. Although it wasn’t technically a rule that the members had to speak Korean when they were doing shows or vlives, the managers were never happy when they didn’t.

To you, it seemed like the more money SM earned, the more they stopped caring that the idols were human beings, not machines. You were one hundred percent ready to leave the company and go work for a better company, like JYP. But you weren’t a quitter and you kept telling yourself to give it some more time, which eventually turned into years of time.

Finally, you set a time limit for yourself. You would stay with the company for one more month and if nothing changed, you would finally move on.

The next day, you were assigned to help manage one of NCT’s sub-units. They were called Dream and it was a group of seven boys all under the age of eighteen. You had already met the oldest member of the group, Mark, as he had debuted in a different unit. To your understanding, he was meant to debut in every single unit, which was just insane to you.

SM fully intended to work that child like a dog until he broke in half and it made you sick to your stomach. It was then that you came to the realization – this was your sign not to quit your job.

That night, you met up with your best friend, Seunghoon, who managed the group Got7. With everything on your mind, you ended up having a bit too much to drink, but it helped you make up your mind on what you needed to do.

“I’ll become a hero and protect the Dreamies from the evil of this world!”

“Ma’am, please don’t stand on the table, you’re disturbing the other customers…”

“Ah, I’m so sorr – ” Your apology died when you lost your balance and collided face first with the ground.

Seunghoon had to apologize to the owners before carrying your drunk ass away.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

Despite the hangover and the painful throbbing of your nose, you went to work the next morning filled with determination.

The Dreamies’ parents put their faith in the company to watch over and protect their children and you’d be damned if you let that faith go to waste!

Maya, the current assistant manager, brought you over to where the boys were getting their hair and makeup done for their MV shooting. “Boys, this is Y/N. She’ll be taking over for me when I move on to NCT U. Be on your best behavior for her, okay?”

They chorused their agreement before taking turns hugging her, seeming sad that she was leaving them. You realized that you had big shoes to fill.

She smiled brightly at you, “Don’t worry! I leave them in your capable hands.”

Swallowing down your nerves, you watched as she walked away. Kids had never been your strong suit in life and standing in front of seven teenagers made you feel older than you actually were. You cleared your throat, trying to sound as confident as possible. “Hello! My name is Y/N and I’ll be taking care of you from now on. Let’s get along!”

You were pleasantly surprised when they smiled and greeted you politely. You listened carefully as they introduced themselves, finding yourself smiling at how adorable and innocent they are. Suddenly, the years of SM hell seemed worth it.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

“Noona~” Chenle pouted, resting his head on your shoulder. “Can we go get ice cream after our interview?”

“Of course~!” You patted his head when he hugged you as thanks.

“There’s a new game that just came out,” Jisung scratched his cheek, shyly. “Can we… maybe go check it out?”

“We can stop by on the way to the ice cream shop. I’ll buy you a copy.”

“Really? Thank you so much, noona!”

Haechan waddled over cutely, showing you a finger heart to win you over. “Noona~ Can I get the new Air Jordans that just came out? They’d look amazing in our new music video!”

“Go ahead and order them.”

“Yes!”

Jaemin shook his head as he sat on the couch beside you. “Don’t you think you’re spoiling them too much, noona?”

“Nope,” you grinned, happily. “I ordered you some new headphones, by the way. They should arrive tomorrow!”

“How did you – ” he followed your gaze to Haechan and sighed, “Should’ve known.” He then offered you a thankful smile. “I appreciate it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Nana.” You ruffled his hair, feeling your heart flutter with happiness. Since you had been an only child growing up, working for Dream was like having a bunch of adorable baby brothers to spoil and make happy.

“You’re late!”

Hearing the manager yell, you looked up. He was pretty angry, that obnoxious vein popping out on his forehead. In front of him stood Mark, breathing heavy as he bowed his head in apology. He was upset, but not because he was being scolded – it was because he had taken so long to arrive. Rather than resting after his schedule with NCT U, he had rushed over to practice with Dream, only to get screamed at for his efforts.

You stood up and approached them, resting your arm around the boy’s shoulders. As much as you wanted to scream and insult the man, you had to keep your job if you wanted to protect the boys. Clearing your throat, you put on your best fake smile. “With all due respect, sir, perhaps we should let Mark rest instead of scolding him. He’s working very hard!”

“Not hard enough!” He bit back, turning his glare to you. “And you have no say in this. You work for me, so your opinions mean nothing. Don’t forget your place, Y/N.”

Your grip tightened as anger coursed through you, making Mark look up at you with concern. Even so, your smile never faltered. “Of course, sir. My apologies!”

When the manager walked away, Mark turned to you with a grateful smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Thank you for standing up for me, but… I don’t want you to get into trouble.”

‘This kid can’t be real’, you rested your hands on his shoulders and your smile turned genuine. “I’m an adult, dear, you don’t have to worry about me. As your noona, it’s my job to protect you. You work harder than anyone I know and I’m very proud of you, Mark.”

This time the smile did reach his eyes.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You threw yourself onto the wooden chair angrily, eyes burning with determination. Seunghoon looked over at you with a raised brow.

“Sometimes, in order to beat the evil you’re facing, you must become evil itself.”

“Did you grab a drink on your way here?”

You slammed your hand on the table. “Miss, one mug of beer, please!”

“Coming right up!”

By this point, he had become convinced that SM had stripped you of the small bit of sanity you had left. How bad were things there that you were talking about heroes and evil? “Whatever you’re planning, I don’t want to know. Just… don’t get arrested, I don’t have the money to bail you out.” You gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up and he sighed. “I’m going to the bathroom.” He headed to the back, internally questioning why he was friends with you. It was bad enough that he had to deal with Got7’s crazy antics, but he also had to deal with yours. Seunghoon definitely was not getting paid enough for this.

Deciding to use this time to put your plan into action, you pulled out your phone and called up your old compadre, Lucile.

– “Hello?”

“Luci! I need a favor.”

– He scoffed, “It’s been three years and I don’t even get a ‘hi’?”

“Hi, Lucile! Long time no speak! How ya been, buddy? Good? Great! I need a favor.”

– He sighed deeply, “What can I do for you, noona?”

“Glad you asked! I need you to find some dirt on someone.”

– “Oh? Are you reverting to your old self?”

“Only a little bit… but it’s for the greater good this time!”

– He hummed, “Name?”

“Chul Kim,”

– “Consider it done.”

“As payment, you can come over and spend time with Mittens~”

– “…”

“…you already do, don’t you?! You broke into my apartment, you little shit?!”

– “Gotta get to work, bye noona~”

“Oi, don’t you dare – ” click. “Son of a – ”

Seunghoon slowly sat back down, trying to ignore the last bit of the conversation, but it worried him. Despite himself, he questioned, “Should I be worried about someone breaking into your apartment?”

“Yes,” you answered, confidently. “The evil is strong, Seunghoonie.”

He sighed once again, convinced that you were, in fact, insane.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You were sitting in the waiting room with the Dreamies, impatiently checking your phone. Lucile was taking his sweet time to deliver the dirt you requested and you were starting to feel anxious. Although you did your best to hide it, intuitive little Jaemin noticed.

He took the seat next to you, playing on his phone. “What’s wrong, noona?”

“Nothing! Everything is perfectly fine~”

He deadpanned, knowing that you were lying. “Noona…”

You changed the subject, “Let me ask you something, Nana. You have to answer honestly, okay?”

Jaemin nodded, putting his phone into his pocket as he turned to give you his full attention.

“Do you like your manager?”

His body tensed at the question and he immediately looked away, glancing at Mark. “He… does his best.”

You hummed at his answer, getting all of the information you needed.

The door swung open and Mark rushed inside, breathing heavily. Their manager glared at him, ordering him to hurry up and change. You felt your anxiety growing as you scowled at your phone, ‘Luci, so help me, if you don’t hurry up you’re never gonna see Mittens!’

As if hearing your thoughts, your phone vibrated as Lucile sent various pictures and snippets of information. You quickly scrolled through it, feeling your lips tug up. This was absolutely perfect!

When the Dreamies went on stage, you approached the manager, tapping his shoulder. He glared at you, demanding to know why you were bothering him. You smiled brightly, showing him one of the pictures. His eyes widened and he grabbed you, his voice harsh and low.

“Where the hell did you get that?!”

“I have my sources~”

“What do you want?”, he growled.

“From now on, I’m in charge. If you even think about being rude to those boys, I’ll make sure every media outlet sees these pictures. You’ll be ruined – no one will ever give you a chance!” You grinned, feeling satisfied as he grew angrier. “The Dreamies deserve the world, and you’re going to give it to them. From now on, you – ” you pointed your index finger at his face. “ – will be their slave!”

“That’s ridiculous! I would never stoop so low.”

“Okay, then~” You pulled up your e-mail, getting ready to send the pictures.

“No, wait! Stop!” He grabbed your wrist, looking desperate. “Fine, fine!”

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

The next few weeks were wonderful. Their manager was treating them like kings and he stopped scolding Mark, instead praising him for working so hard. Everyone noticed the change, but only Jaemin realized that you had something to do with it.

You sat off to the side, watching the manager bringing bottles of water to the boys after they finished practice. You felt proud of yourself and you were even tempted to return to your old ways because of how amazing it felt.

The couch dipped as Jaemin settled in beside you, leaning his head on your shoulder.

“You did a good job, Nana.” You pulled him into a hug, patting his head.

“Thank you, noona… for everything.”

You tilted your head to the side and he smiled brightly.

“You’re our hero~”

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

[eddiesasspbrak]

“Why don’t you believe me?”

Prompt inspired by one line of dialogue.

On AO3

Richie Tozier is in love with his best friend. But how do you confess to someone you're always lying to?

2k+ words, oneshot

Richie Tozier was in love with his best friend. He’d spent their early years denying he was even gay, not wanting to deal with the ramifications of being queer in a small backwards town like Derry. When he’d finally accepted that he was doomed to be attracted to men, he also realized that maybe his desire to be close to Eddie Kaspbrak was fueled by more than just friendship.

Soon he found himself watching the other boy whenever they were together. And they were together all the time. He watched him when they were riding bikes down the streets with their friends, he watched him when they were hanging out at one of the Losers houses, and when they went swimming in the quarry, he for sure watched him.

He tried to be discrete about it, but that proved difficult when that adorable little face was laughing so wistfully. His eyes would crinkle, and his smile would spread across his whole face, lighting it up in the most beautiful way. Even when he was giving him dirty looks or rolling his eyes at a joke Richie had just tried, he was beautiful in his eyes. The way he made Richie’s heart pound in his chest with the simplest gestures made it seem like it was intentional. Luckily, only two people had noticed the way he fixated on the other boy, and neither one was Eddie.

Two of his other best friends, Stanley Uris and Beverly Marsh, not only noticed, they talked about it together regularly. In fact, they had a bet going. Stan believed that Eddie would notice before Richie ever got around to confessing. Bev believed that Richie would reach his breaking point and blurt it out in a very public, very embarrassing way. If she won, Stan promised to buy her a carton of cigarettes, if he won, Bev would break into his father’s office, steal the creepy painting and burn it. They shook on it and then watched Richie’s panicked face as he realized he’d been staring for just a little too long.

Richie and Eddie regularly spent time together without the rest of their friends. They were comfortable with one another, able to sit quietly together for long periods of time without it getting awkward. Eddie spent much of his free time in Richie’s basement. Richie wasn’t really allowed to be at Eddie’s house. His mom didn’t like him or his crude sense of humor. Sometimes he’d still sneak him in, but it was just easier being at Richie’s.

Eddie lay sprawled out on the couch, Richie on the floor near his feet with his back to the couch. Both had comics in their hands, neither one having outgrown them over the years. Richie couldn’t concentrate on what he was looking at, staring at the same page for ten minutes, not comprehending the words he was reading. Every time Eddie would shift on the couch, laugh at a joke he’d read, or reacted to something that was happening on the page, all of Richie’s attention was suddenly on him. He was extremely distracting.

Unable to resist any longer, Richie turned his head to the side to get a look at the other boy. Most his face was obscured by the comic, only a sliver of his smile visible from his vantage point. Still, that was enough for Richie. It aggravated him how something so simple could make him suddenly feel like he could puke from the nerves knotted in his stomach. The other boy distracted, he took this chance to linger a bit longer. He lost himself in imagining what it would be like to just lean up and kiss his best friend.

He was pulled from the fantasy when Eddie’s socked foot collided with the side of his head, knocking his glasses askew. He straightened the large frames on his face and focused his attention on Eddie’s face. He’d dropped the comic down to his chest and was looking at Richie with a small smile on his lips. Richie prayed then that he wasn’t blushing.

“What is wrong with you?” Eddie asked, amused.

“Nothing.” Richie shot back quickly.

“You haven’t turned the page in like fifteen minutes, and you were just staring at me with this vacant look on your face. I think you were drooling.”

“I was not.” Richie lifted his comic from his lap and went back to trying to read.

“Seriously, what the hell is up with you lately? You keep zoning out.”

“I’m just distracted. It’s nothing.”

“By what?”

“Your mom. Let it go.”

Now Eddie was intrigued. Richie often used jokes to deflect from he was actually feeling. He had his moments in which he showed his friends how deeply he truly cared for them. But when it was personal, he was likely to avoid the topic and distract the others with a series of groan worthy jokes. It was when he couldn’t even come up with those that they knew it was something really bothering him.

“That’s all you got? Come on Richie, if you’re going to try to change the subject at least try a little harder.” Eddie said, swinging his legs over the edge of the couch and sitting up.

“Fuck you.” Richie responded, ignoring his challenge

Eddie set his comic to the side a slid off the couch and onto the floor next to Richie. Their sides were pressed together closely, and Richie was trying his best to pretend they weren’t. Eddie nudged the other with his shoulder three times, the first two softer, the third hard enough to knock him slightly sideway, making him drop one side of the comic. He wasn’t going to let Eddie win though.

“Come on, Trashmouth, make me laugh.” Eddie said, poking his cheek with one exceptionally clean fingernail.

“Stop.” Richie said, smacking his hand away.

Refusing to give up, Eddie turned himself until his back was facing Richie, lifting himself up slightly and dropping back down on top of Richie’s lap, pinning the comic beneath him. Now Richie was forced to look at him though Eddie hadn’t been expecting the look of panic that he was met with.

“What the fuck, Eddie!” Richie nearly shouted, pulling his hands out from under the smaller boy.

“Stop ignoring me.” Eddie said, as if his actions were completely justified.

“What do you want?”

“I want you to tell me what’s going on with you.”

“Get the fuck off me.” Richie said, trying to shove Eddie off his lap.

Eddie dug his heels into the carpet, trying to prevent him from successfully removing him from on top of him.

“Not until you agree to tell me what’s going on.” Eddie said.

“Nothing is going on! Get. Off.”

“You can’t fucking lie to me! I know there’s something in that head of yours that you’re not sharing.” Eddie emphasized his words by poking Richie’s forehead as he spoke.

“Why do I need to tell you?” Richie was getting angry, not wanting to have this conversation.

“Because I’m your best friend! You tell me everything!”

“I don’t tell you everything!”

“Yes, you do! Give me one good reason why you can’t tell me what’s going on!”

“Because I fucking love you! That’s why!”

As soon as the words left Richie’s mouth the room fell silent. Eddie’s mouth hung open, having been prepared to respond to whatever he said, but no words came to him. He stared up at his best friend’s very red face and wide eyes in disbelief. He wasn’t sure he’d heard him right, or if he actually understood what he was trying to convey. Then again, this was Richie and Eddie knew him very well.

“Oh…oh haha asshole.” Eddie said, sitting up and turning to face him.

“What?” Richie asked, shocked.

“You can’t distract me. I want to know what’s going on with you.”

“I just…I just told you!”

“Bullshit! I know how you operate, Tozier. Playing a game of gay chicken to distract me from the conversation. Let me freak out and not know what to say just so you can start laughing at me. You’ll call me stupid for falling for it and I’ll get angry and forget what we were talking about. It’s not going to work!”

Richie didn’t say anything for a long moment. Ok, maybe that’s something he would have done a few years ago. But to be fair, that was before he began questioning his sexuality. When, and if, he eventually confessed his feelings to Eddie, he hadn’t been expecting this kind of reaction.

“I’m not lying.” He finally said.

“I’m not falling for it!”

“I’m not lying! Why would I lie about something like this? Why don’t you believe me?” Richie’s heart was beating so hard he was surprised it wasn’t visible from outside his chest.

“Why? Grade seven! We were wrestling. You took my inhaler and I was trying to get it back. I ended up sitting on top of you and you looked me dead in the eyes and said, ‘we should kiss’. When I got all embarrassed and started stuttering worse than Bill, you started laughing so hard there were tears in your eyes! This isn’t your first time trying shit like this on me!”

Richie honestly didn’t know what he could say to make him believe him. He had been too fast and loose with his jokes in the past and now it was hurting him. Could your heart break even if you weren’t officially being rejected? It had to be possible as Richie currently felt like he’d been kicked in the stomach and he was going to be sick. If this felt this terrible, how bad would it feel it Eddie was really rejecting him? Richie made a choice.

“Yea, fine. It was a joke. Haha.” Despite his best efforts, his voice came out flat.

Eddie’s eyebrows knit together in confusion. Sure, he believed it was a sick joke but Richie’s reaction to his own humor was usually boisterous, not like this. In the past when he’d managed to convince Eddie of something, his response to him would have been rolling on the floor, holding his sides as he howled with laughter. Even if Eddie figured out what he was doing and didn’t give him the reaction he wanted, he was still always all smiles.

Abruptly, Richie stood and crossed to the fridge in the corner. He opened it and began scanning the cans of pop that sat on the shelf. Eddie watched him. Something was definitely wrong, and he wasn’t going to let Richie avoid it now.

“Richie…what is going on?” Eddie asked, his voice softer now.

Richie closed the fridge without making a selection, his hand remaining on the handle, his back to Eddie. The smaller boy stood and began to cross the room to his friend. He stopped in his tracks when he saw just the smallest tremble in Richie’s shoulders, his free hand balled into a fist at his side.

“Richie…”

“You should probably go.” Richie spoke quickly, his voice uneven.

“But you-.”

“Just go!” Richie shouted, still refusing to turn around.

Eddie startled but didn’t move. He knew that Richie was crying, or at least trying very hard not to. What could be so bad that he would respond like this? Eddie had seen him cry before; in fact, he’d hugged him for dear life while he cried. This was different. He’d never been afraid to let Eddie see him like this before.

Eddie thought back to how their conversation had started. He’d been staring with this look on his face. Like he was lost in a fantasy of pure bliss. While looking at his face. Eddie wondered if he’d always been this slow and realized how monumentally he’d fucked up. He was just so used to Richie and his stupid jokes at his expense. His kneejerk reaction was to take everything he said as a joke.

“Richie.” Eddie said, taking another step toward him.

“I told you to leave.” Richie sighed, frustrated.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Eddie said, matter-o-fact. “Richie were you…were you serious?”

“No. I told you. It was a joke.” Richie deadpanned.

“You’re lying.”

“Which is it, Eddie? Am I lying about loving you or lying about lying?”

“Can you just turn around. It’s annoying talking to your back.”

“Then leave.”

Eddie sighed dramatically and closed the distance between them, grabbing hold of Richie’s shoulder and forcing him to turn. His eyes were red around the edges, tear tracks on his cheeks though they weren’t falling anymore. He quickly turned his head to the side so Eddie couldn’t see and wiped at his face with his sleeve.

“Richie…I’m-.”

“Don’t. I don’t want to hear it.” Richie said, leaning against the wall behind him.

“You don’t know what I’m going to say.”

“Yes, I do. Can’t we just pretend this didn’t happen?”

“No. We can’t. Why didn’t you tell me before now?”

“Because of how fantastically well this went.” Richie said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

“You can’t blame me for thinking it was a trick! I’ve been burned by you one too many times before.”

Richie didn’t have a response for that. And that was fine, because Eddie didn’t want to hear another excuse from him or a request for denial. He didn’t want to hear anything self-deprecating or annoyingly stupid. He just wanted for that trashmouth to stay shut for once so he could confirm something.

Standing on his toes to close the small difference in height, Eddie grabbed Richie by the back of the neck and brought his mouth to his own. The kiss was innocent, and short, Eddie pulling away when Richie’s fingers brushed against his hip. The look Richie was giving him now was enough to make him laugh under different circumstances. He had to hold it in for now, not wanting Richie to think now that he was fucking with him.

“How long do you think I’ve been in love with you? Wishing that just for one day you saw me as more than your friend and target for jokes.” Eddie asked, removing his hand from Richie’s neck and stepping back.

“What? You...” Again, Richie was at a loss for words.

“Since grade seven when you said, ‘we should kiss.’ All I could think about for the next week was kissing you. It was all down hill from there. Jackass.”

“You never said anything. Never acted like you had feelings for me.” Richie was still in shock.

“What choice did I have? I was 90% sure you were straight and didn’t know how you’d react. Why are you surprised? Isn’t that the same way you felt?”

“Wait…what about the other 10%?” Richie asked.

Eddie rolled his eyes and ignored the question before looking at Richie with a soft expression. “Tell me again.” He said, taking another step closer.

“What?”

“Tell me again.” He repeated. “I promise to have the right reaction this time.”

Richie swallowed. This Eddie was one he didn’t know. An Eddie who loved him as more than a friend, an Eddie who had just kissed him, an Eddie who was now looking at him with nearly literal hearts in his eyes. The empty hole in his chest was gone and now it squeezed painfully, the anxiety creeping up his back and catching in his throat.

“I…I love you.” He said, breathless.

Eddie smiled, his hand finding its way into Richie’s. “I love you too.”

Richie was on cloud nine as he leaned down and initiated the kiss this time. Eddie’s lips were soft and tasted salty from the pretzels they’d been eating earlier. Richie imagined countless times what it would feel like to gently hold Eddie’s face between his hands, while the other boy’s hands tangled in his hair and now, he knew. It was bliss. Complete and utter bliss.

A few weeks later, they would slip up in front of their friends and wind up telling them that they were together. They’re supportive, because of course they are. Eddie and Richie don’t quite understand just why Beverly smiled as wide as she did or why Stan groaned in anguish when they told them how it happened. That is, until an hour later when Stan disappears for a ten minutes and comes back with a carton of cigarettes in Beverly’s preferred brand and handed it over to her. Eddie chastises them for betting on their friends and Richie complains that he hadn’t been included.

Nothing much changed when they were with their friends. The two boys had already been very close, very physical with one another, now they just snuck kisses when the others weren’t looking. Their friends noticed no change at all, confused as to why they hadn’t gotten together long ago and saved themselves a lot of pain. Neither wanted to think about that. They were together now and that’s all that mattered.

[tarithenurse]

On my mind, in my soul - 4

Prompt: Blue, floor, Foreigner’s God by Hozier (passages in block quotes) Pairing: Loki x Burglar!reader. Content: Swearing, angst, pain (mostly emotional), arguing, sadness, mention of trauma, LEMONS (with a hint of dom/sub?)...fluff? A/N: Link to previous chapters in Masterlist (check bio or tab). If you want a tag, then just ask (yay). Please reblog if you enjoyed...or comment! Comments are nice too. When that’s said...probably a shitload of typos etc bc i’ve not proofread ‘cause I’m in a shitty place mentally after a too social weekend (so worth it though). “Resume”: (Because this takes off right where we left last chapter)  The heavy sigh rattles you to your core. “I’m sorry for this, [Y/N].” Glancing briefly, you see how he runs a hand over his face, rubbing the tired eyes momentarily. “I can only imagine what you must think of me, truly…but I need you to hear me out, alright?”

It’s not like you have a choice, really, and this conversation has started nothing like you’d expected. “Then talk.”

Holding the Devil’s Hand

Waiting impatiently for the worst too happen, it surprised you when you realize he’s sitting down on the floor as far away from you as possible. There are other options for him to sit comfortably, still he’s chosen the least threatening option. It’s on purpose…trying to make me at ease. Drop my guard. Regardless the reasoning behind it, however, the silence still hangs heavy in the air, threatening to explode if neither of you say anything.

Her eyes look sharp and steady Into the empty parts of me

“I’m not good at these sort of things…apologies.” Stalling already with a sigh, Loki settles down more comfortably in the corner by the door. “I realize that…nothing I say can make it up to you…” You can feel his eyes on your back and it paralyses you, afraid what might set him off. “I…I’m prone to think very highly of myself and my skills as the God of Mischief and Chaos. Finding that I had been tricked and by a Midgardian girl no less?” He snorts in disbelief at his own words, releasing a hot prickle of anger in your chest. “I was intrigued. Amused more than offended…”

You grab the chance as he trails off. “So far you’ve said nothing that warrants fucking kidnapping me! Either get to it or let me go now!”

“Easy, tiger,” the god smirks, “my point is…your skills, personality…you…I see potential. The few testes I arranged proved that you’re exactly the partner in crime I need for a very delicate…challenge. I’ve been spending almost every waking hour since we parted to try to find you in the hopes of…convincing you to return so I could explain myself and extend an offer I think would be mutually beneficial,” Loki’s voice lowers to a purr, “because you can’t deny that we’re good together. Although…complementing each others’ baser instinct was a bonus which I thought you had no problem with until the…misunderstanding we –“

“Misunderstanding?” Spinning to face him, all the fear’s been flushed away by anger-fueled adrenaline and you can feel the nails dig into your palms to keep your hands from shaking. Anger at him. And anger at the heat in your core at the memories he awakens. “Misunderstanding!? Are you fuckin’ serious right now??!! You hit me so hard that I landed at the other side of the bloody room!”

He’s on his feet quicker than you can fathom and you jerk backwards until you collide with the bench by the window, sending you hard on your ass. The fearful retreat stops him short. Burning indignation reigned in in the same way he returns to the far side although he stays standing.

“What you accused me of being willing to do…” Loki’s voice’s shaking with anger although he tries to hold it back, “people may never think of me as good, but I have a code if you will. Some things that I’ll never lower myself to.”

“H-how should I…” The words are hardly getting across your lips as you stutter meekly along, so you try again. “Ho-ow should I know that?” It’s hardly a victory to finish a sentence, but this time it feels as though you’ve accomplished something grand, the little thrill enabling you to continue. “Prone, held at knifepoint by a guy who was accused of all sorts of shit. And not just here on earth.”

You know from experience how good Loki’s at using his tongue, but words don’t come easy as he opens and closes the pretty mouth of his until eventually, he stops trying and withdraws into himself. Once more, the only sounds is the faint buzz from the lamps and a gurgle in the waterpipes hidden behind the rich wallpaper. Rubbing the back of your legs where you’d slammed them against the seat, you assure yourself that not even a bruise will hint at your clumsiness.

The sound of a lock makes you look up to see Loki opening the door and stepping well out of the way, granting a clear path out of his bedroom. He doesn’t look at you, so you doubt your ears when he tells you that you are free to go.

Hesitantly at first, you tread across the soft carpet, each step bringing you close to freedom yet also fanning a doubt in your mind. Five steps to the door, Loki’s standing still in front of the mirror by the dresser. Four steps, you ignore the frown and glistening trail on his cheek. Two steps, and your legs are slowing, body fighting against the logic that urges you to hurry out and down the stairs, whishing no one will stop you. One step, and a memory presents itself, uncalled for at an inopportune moment which causes even your logic to hesitate. In the doorway itself, you come to a halt.

She feels no control of her body She feels no safety in my arms

“What was it?” Don’t hear the quiver of my voice, please.

You can see the staircase from where you stand, the broad steps granting a glimpse to the hall below.

“What was what?” Loki answers flatly.

“What was the reason the charges were dropped? About your role in New York?”

Everyone had been stunned when the news leaked, and it had been the rage in the media and online where the most absurd conspiracy theories went unchecked because really, what arguments were there anymore now that it was a fact that aliens existed?

“It’s of no consequence.” Arms cross over his chest, defiant and protectively. “Just leave. Forget about this. I will not bother you anymore.”

Dimwitted, emo-loving freak, your logic begins a rant to get you from doing exactly what you end up with anyways. A few steps back, while cussing yourself to Antarctica and back, brings the reflection of the god’s face back in view. Pale and hard. A hand nimbly swipes a wet shimmer away before it reaches the sharp jaw. Don’t fucking do it. It’s a trap. He’s a trickster. A liar. The sharp sting from the teeth sinking into your lower lip shuts up the inner monologue for a moment, allowing you to breathe deeply and way the risks.

All that I've been taught And every word I've got Is foreign to me

“You’d never given me a reason to actually…fear you…despite your majorly creepy stunts of breaking in to my place and shit…” The exhale comes as a puff, that stirs the fine particles dancing in the air between the open door and you. “The rules of our…game...thing…they were never clear, but you…you…uhm…” Struggling to put the chaotic thoughts into words, you know that you’re trying to convince yourself more than him and you hate yourself for it. “You’d not done anything I didn’t want be-before I accused you of wanting to…y’know…and you hadn’t even hinted that that was something…”

Loki has gone completely still, barely even breathing as he listens to the mumbled mess, but you’re at a loss at what you actually want to accomplish. Comfort him? He’d hurt you physically. Scared you. But if anyone had said something similar to you, wouldn’t you have lost your temper? Difference is, of course, that you don’t have the strength to literally knock someone through a wall.

“Gimme one good reason to trust y’again.” The harshness you’d tried to summon is inaudible, reducing your order to a plea.

“Not that.”

Staying quiet, you absentmindedly try to rub some warmth into your arms as you wait for the man to quit being stubborn. It’s going to be a long wait, but now that the door’s open you aren’t in as bad a rush as before.

“There’s an item which I greatly desire, but it’s of dire importance tha–“

“You can take the item and shove it unless you don’t answer my question,” your voice cracks like a whip, silencing Loki quite efficiently and you notice how the god’s body tenses.

A rustle accompanies the stubborn, no, haughty answer. “I told those who need to know about…the background for New York.”

“Then there’s no more to talk about.”

You’re in the hallway, when he calls out for you, broken and beaten by his own demons. I should continue. Already, your feet are rooted on the polished wood. I should leave. Soft footsteps are drawing near, urging you to run rather than turn to face the man the way you actually do, watching his cautionary movements and the tremble of his hands, feeling the cold roll over you once more. This is a trick. Eyes meet and you have no doubt that the pain he’s exhibiting is real.

“Tell me what happened.” It’s a soft murmur, spoken into his raven hair as you awkwardly pat his back.

It takes a minute or two before he straightens up, freeing you shoulder from the weight of his chilly head but taking your hands instead to tug you gently with him back into the room.

The door closes softly behind you, no click of the lock this time at least, as Loki silently offers the bed as a seat for you. You accept hesitantly, afraid of how long or short a time is left before the trap’s sprung. A trap you’ve walked into freely this time. Thankfully, he leans against the wall by the bathroom door with his head hung low as you fidget with the hem of the purple silk, trying to find some way to soothe your nerves. Can I take the cover? The air’s freezing.

“If you ever tell anyone about this…”

He doesn’t finish the sentence. Doesn’t have to, really, mostly because even in your world there are some things that are sacred. He’s not the only one with a code. And then he begins talking about event long passed, about wrongs he had done of his own free will where not even the despair he’d felt was an excuse and no promises from neither him nor his family could right the many wrongs that had been committed. It had let to his fall. Literally and figuratively.

Then the tale takes a turn for the worse. To a darkness where words fail along with the god’s human appearance. As Loki talks about torture and pain beyond any you’ve experienced, his real form breaks free as if trying to protect him from the memories. Red eyes blur and burn in stark contrast to the ice that form around him, creeping towards you. And still you inch closer to him, to hear the words that are whispered hoarsely and to tentatively extend a quivering hand, placing it on his dark-clawed fingers.  Squeezing as he whispers the name of a Titan.

Screaming the name Of a foreigner's God The purest expression of grief

“I don’t want your pity,” he growls, trying to shake off the hand.

I know. “Good. ‘Cause you’re not getting it.” You manage to contain the sigh. “You’re still a fucking lunatic, but at least I know why…I can work with this…”

“You can…?” Eyes like blood scorch your skin.

Yeah, it’s not smart of me, though. “Gonna clear up some things if it’s gonna work…and you’ve got a shitload of sucking up ‘fore I forgive you for bashing me ‘cross the room.”

The reaction’s immediate, perfect proof that you’ve chosen the wrong words. A low frequency makes the air hum, and the face folds into that of a predator that’s both hungry and amused because it knows where to find the next meal without putting any real effort into it. Catching your wrist before you can pull your hand back, so you tug hard, pulling Loki’s on his knees before you as you scuttle back along the wide bed. Raven hair partially obscuring the smirk curling his lips, falling away grant a view of the shoulder blades oscillating under the thin, white shirt that’s stretching tight over the wider-than-normal body.

“How convenient.” The lip that darts out have an effect on more than just Loki’s lips. “I’ll do more than just…suck…up.”

Pressed up against the headboard, your only escape would be off the other side of the bed, but of course you don’t go for it because you’re a fool with no backbone to resist the silver-tongued god even now. That’s why you let him grab your ankles and pull you slowly to the edge of the bed, kissing each inch of skin as it gets within reach all the while he bunches up the thin fabric of your dress until his lips ghost across the very top of your inner thigh. A cold nose brush the soft lace as he switches attention from one side to the other, almost distracting you from the fingers that are wandering past your hips and across the expanse of you belly, straining the fabric and setting off shivers that have nothing to do with the cold of the room.

There’s a warm shimmer, a sign that you know very well already, exposing more of your body and granting Loki a chance to slither the exploring hand further until it skims the valley between the breasts to trace the delicate lace that does absolutely nothing to hide the perking nipples. Teasing and pinching them through the bra ads a lovely contrast to the feathery kisses and licks below the waist until you’re breathing raggedly, chasing Loki’s mouth with your still covered cunt.

Wide strokes of blue palms towards your hips send new waves of anticipation rushing along, and you can feel how slick your core is becoming even though the god hasn’t even touched you there. The moment his fingers hook on the panties, you can’t help but hold your breath. Glancing down between your legs to see delight warming the features decorated with lines…lines that you know from experience are practically everywhere on his body. But the green eyes are trained on the reveal happening before him as, inch by inch, your pussy’s bared.

“So beautiful.”  The words are carried on cold breath but hold more warmth and adoration than anyone else has ever shown for your body. “Perfect…and eager.”

You know somehow that you moan the moment his mouth finds your folds and begins to tease, driving you to writhing and whimpering to the precipice of release all while Loki’s kneeling on the floor between your feet. Each moan from your lips makes him hum with pleasure, sending vibrations into your core in a way that shouldn’t be possible. Every gasp and panting breath from your lungs causes him to suck greedily at your clit.

Somewhere in the process, you realize as Loki spreads your legs further, he’s removed your panties completely, but a particular strong lick that curls his tip of his tongue inside you chases any coherent thoughts away. Then you feel his fingers pushing and wiggling against the fluttering walls of your pussy, finding the g-spot and running over it again and again in slow pumps matching the pace of his lips. Teeth nibbling and tugging in a masterful feat of balance between pleasure and pain.

“Let me hear you…then I’ll let you cum.” Even when talking, Loki doesn’t let up but applies a thumb deftly to your clit. “Say my name.”

In the foggy storm of you mind, the words annoy you. That wasn’t the deal. It’s a struggle to get as far as to rest on your elbows because each movement requires coordinated use of your muscles that are trembling due to Loki’s ministrations. Finally in place, you catch his hooded, red eyes.

“N-no-o.” Your answer makes him slow down, but not stop. “You’ve no…right…to demand anything.”

You’re gasping for breath and in no condition to assert any imagined power, but pure stubbornness fuels you even as the man arches an eyebrow at you in disbelief. Lazy circles around the nerve bundle keeps you on edge, fingers slide effortlessly through the tight wetness in a way that sweep your g-spot gently.

“My dear, I believe you’re right…I did give my word.”

The low growl should have been warning enough in it’s own, but you’re too tightly wrapped in the ecstasy his adept handling has you stewing in to notice how his arms wrap around your thighs. All you know is that the world seems to shift around you sending you off the edge of the bed and impaling you swiftly around the ridged cock. All air leaves you in a warbled moan as the sudden intrusion topples you over the edge, back arching so you shoulders rest on the mattress, holding you partially in place like a safety in case your grip on Loki’s shoulders should fail. Even then, he’s got your hips in a bruising grip, lifting and lowering you effortlessly at a reckless pace without any risk of you slipping away.

Your core is spasming, sending thundering waves of heat each time the icy shaft bottoms out, ridges passing the sensitive spot each time. Sharp keens spur the god to rut into you wilder, practically shoving you back onto the bed as he leans over you to taste your skin. Lavish kisses and love bites soak up the pearls of sweat and he sucks greedily at your neck, you breasts, your mouth. The two of you share breaths through the superficial pantings, causing you to slowly black out from the mix of restricted air and the continuous orgasm burning through your body.

A cold thumb presses against your clit, rubbing tiny circles simultaneously bringing you even higher than you thought possible as Loki succumbs to bliss, your name woven into the shameless moan fanning your throat an instant before his leaves your lips as a ragged, breathy scream.

Screaming the name Of a foreigner's God …

Wrapped in Loki’s (now pale) arms, your thought are barely coherent enough to wonder if it’s a good idea to linger. He’s taken care of you gently and sweeter than you thought possible from someone like him.

Who am I kidding…there’s no one like him!

Those are your last thoughts as sleep claims you.

[fanficshiddles]

I’m still breathing, Chapter 8

Red eyes flashed from the darkness. They were concentrating on Sophie. A low growl emitted from them, making Sophie gasp as she looked up to see them. Fear started to course through her veins. She turned and started to run, trying to escape in the darkness.

Loki tried to get his legs to move as he saw the frost giant chasing her. He found he couldn’t move, it was as if his legs were immobile. He tried calling out to her, screaming at her to run faster. But no words came out. All he saw was the flash of blue as it chased after the mutant.

It was too quick for Sophie and collided with her. Then everything went black. Loki screamed, trying to see what happened to her. When suddenly the frost giant slowly came into view. It was huddled over a body. Loki was able to move closer, until the giant stood up and turned around.

Loki let out a sob, as he was face to face with his frost giant self.

Loki abruptly shot up in bed. His body was sweating and he was trembling. He looked down at his arms, relieved to see they weren’t blue. That was the third night in a row he’d had that nightmare, he wasn’t sure why. But it was really grating on him.

After tossing and turning in bed for almost an hour, he gave up and decided to go to the library and read for a while. That always calmed his nerves down.

When he entered the library however, he was confused and surprised to find Sophie asleep on the floor by the sofa. He walked over towards her, the sound of his footsteps caused her to waken. She glanced up and smiled.

‘Hey, Loki.’ She said and closed her eyes again.

‘What are you doing asleep on the floor?’ He queried, raising an eyebrow up in amusement when she suddenly shot up and looked just as confused as he was.

‘I… Have no idea.’ She rubbed her eyes as she came to more, having been in a deep sleep prior to Loki coming along. ‘I was reading… On the sofa. I must have fallen asleep and… Fell?’ She went to stand up when a hand came in to view to help her. She took his hand and he hoisted her up to her feet.

‘Are you sure you’re not drunk?’ Loki teased, a smirk playing on his lips.

Sophie glared at him but laughed. ‘I am sure. I’ve never been drunk in my life.’ After wiping her clothes from any mess from the floor, she sat down on the sofa again and Loki sat next to her. ‘What are you doing up at this time?’

‘I couldn’t sleep.’ He shrugged, but Sophie could tell something was off.

‘What’s wrong?’ She asked.

Loki looked over at her and saw her genuinely looking concerned. He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. ‘I just keep having the same nightmare, or similar, for the last few nights. Where I am the monster that I am.’

‘Loki.’ She said in warning. ‘You are NOT a monster. Stop calling yourself that, or I will punch you!’

‘I’d like to see you try.’ Loki grinned, amused at her threat.

‘Don’t tempt me! I am getting stronger now, I’m sure I could stab the knife further into your stomach this time.’

Loki laughed at her cute threat, and reached out to trail his fingers up and down her arm. ‘I remember when the mere sight of me had you running scared.’ He said teasingly.

‘Well, that was before I knew you.’ She shrugged. ‘Stop trying to avoid the conversation. Why do you think you’re suddenly having nightmares?’

‘I have no idea. If I did, I would sort it out.’

‘What happens in them?’

Loki faltered, he’d been hoping she wasn’t going to ask that question. ‘I see a frost giant hunting down a human. When I reach them it’s too late, the giant turns and it is me.’

Sophie and Loki continued to talk through the night, but it didn’t help much as Loki still couldn’t figure out what his nightmares were about. Sophie wasn’t sure either, though she did try her best to help him. And he adored her even more for that. Her true personality was shining through more now she was with people she trusted. She was a kind soul, cheeky at times and playful. But tough. She was one of the strongest Midgardians that Loki had ever met, mentally and getting there physically. She and Loki were a good double act. He was already teaching her pranks to pull, good ones too, on the other Avengers.

The two ended up falling asleep together, with Sophie resting her head against his chest as he had his arm around her. In the morning, Thor was looking for them both and when he found them in the library, still sleeping peacefully, he smiled and left them alone.

When Sophie and Loki eventually woke up, Sophie’s hair was all messy making Loki laugh.

‘What?’ She asked sleepily.

‘Your hair is delightful, darling.’ He grinned, reaching up to smooth it out for her.

‘Yours isn’t much better.’ She grumbled.

‘Always so delightful first thing in the morning.’ He chuckled.

Sophie just grumbled again in response. She went back to her room to get changed into clean clothes and then she went for breakfast, meeting Loki there.

‘Nice to see you both awake after your stop out in the library.’ Thor chuckled, joining Loki and Sophie at their table.

‘Ohhh, a dirty stop out?’ Tony teased, sitting at the table with them too.

‘Thor you big blabber mouth. Neither of us could sleep, we went to read and then we ended up falling asleep there.’ Loki said as he glared sideways at his brother.

After eating breakfast, Natasha and Wanda dragged Sophie away to go shopping. Which she agreed to this time and actually went along.

Loki went to go to his room, but Thor caught up with him before he reached it. ‘Brother. I wish to talk.’

‘What about? I am not particularly in the mood to talk.’

‘But I bet you would be if I was Sophie.’ Thor grinned.

Loki stopped and turned his full attention to Thor. ‘Thor, if you were Sophie I would be deeply troubled.’

‘You know what I mean. She is what I wanted to talk to you about.’ Thor continued. ‘Is there more to you and Sophie than meets the eye? You both seem to have grown very close and I just wondered if there was more.’

‘What is that supposed to mean? Just because I have a friend who actually likes me more than you, you suspect something? Are you jealous that she has bonded with me and not you?’ Loki snapped.

Thor held his hands up in defence. ‘Loki, no need to get defensive. I was merely asking a question. I have not seen you so happy and relaxed in such a long time. I am happy for you and I actually was hoping there would be more to your relationship than the rest of us know about.’

Loki’s features softened slightly. Thor knew him too well though, he knew that Loki clearly liked her in more than just a good friend way. He always got overly defensive with that kind of thing. Never liked to admit his true feelings.

‘There is something I wanted to speak to you about.’ Loki sighed and motioned for Thor to go into his room.

The brothers sat down and Thor waited to hear what Loki had to say. It wasn’t often that Loki opened up to him about his feelings or anything really, so he was keen to hear what he had to say.

‘Maybe I do care for Sophie more than in a friendly way. However, I am sure having romantic interests is the least of her thoughts right now. And I am worried that I will end up hurting her.’

‘What? Why would you harm her?’ Thor frowned.

‘I once killed over 100 humans. She is a human. What happens if I lose control again? Or if my monster comes out.’

Thor knew what he meant by monster. His heart hurt for his brother.

‘Brother. You will not lose control again. You are in a good place now. I vowed to mother that I would look out for you and I will keep my word. I highly doubt the others would let you go off the rails either. And stop calling yourself a monster.’

‘I keep having these nightmares, for the past three nights. Where I am a frost giant and I kill her! Why else would I have them if it is not meant to warn me to stay away?’ Loki stood up, agitated.

Thor ran a hand down his face. ‘Loki. You will not hurt her. You’ve already saved her life, twice. I think these nightmares are stemming from your fear of committing. Or from coming to terms with your feelings for someone. There is nothing wrong with being scared. I was terrified when I first admitted to Jane my love for her. It’s natural, even for gods.’ Thor put his hand onto Loki’s shoulder.

‘But why would I dream of killing her? A bit extreme, is it not?’

‘Perhaps. But you have always been one for being extreme with your actions and emotions, Loki. Relax, enjoy your time with her. Tell her how you feel if you think it will help, or don’t.’ Thor shrugged. ‘But either way, we all know you would not harm her. Have you told her about your Jotun form?’

‘Yes, I have. She’s told me repeatedly that I am no monster.’ Loki said sheepishly.

‘Maybe you need to show her, so that you can see her reaction. That might put your mind to rest?’ Thor suggested.

That evening, Sophie could tell something was still bothering Loki. He was antsy and on edge, she’d never seen him like that before.

‘Are you alright?’ She asked when they left the living room after watching a film with everyone.

‘I… I need to show you something.’ Loki blurted out before he changed his mind.

‘Ok… What is it?’ Sophie raised an eyebrow at him, confused.

‘Come with me.’ Loki put his hand out for her to take.

He led her to his room and put the Hulk force field up, making Sophie even more confused and unsure.

‘Like this isn’t weird or suspicious at all, Loki?’ She folded her arms over her chest.

Loki took a deep breath and ran a hand down his face. ‘I… I want to show you my true form.’

Sophie took a second to process what he’d just said. ‘You don’t have to prove anything to me, Loki. Why do you want to?’ She asked softly.

Loki looked a bit like a fish, as he opened his mouth but was unsure on what to say for a moment. ‘You are the first person here that I actually have a connection with. You are the only person to stick up for me. Especially after what I did to your planet. I think the nightmares I’ve been having is because I am scared that if you were to see my true form for some reason, that you may run for the hills. So if I show you now, then at least you can see me for the true monster I am.’

‘Loki, you are not’

Loki cut her off by putting his hand up. ‘Just, let me show you first. Please. I need to do this. You’ve opened yourself up to me, trusted me with your past. I want to share mine.’

Sophie had never seen Loki look so vulnerable before. She perched on the edge of his bed and nodded at him.

Loki looked down and closed his eyes. He concentrated and felt the cold engulf his skin. He let out a breath and opened his eyes after he heard nothing from the mutant.

Her eyes were wide, but instead of fear or disgust in them was instead awe. He wasn’t sure what to think. No words came from him while she stood up and walked towards him, taking in his appearance. She reached up to touch his face, but he stepped back.

‘I don’t want to hurt you.’ He said quickly.

‘You won’t… I kind of researched about Jotuns and learned that you will only give me frostbite if you want to.’ She said softly and stepped in close to him again.

Loki sighed and leaned down slightly, nodding to her. He closed his eyes when she reached out towards him and he let out a gasp when he felt her fingers touch his cheek.

Sophie trailed her fingers up and down his face, over the markings he had and across his forehead.

‘You are still beautiful, even in this form. Thank you, for trusting me to show me.’ She said softly when he opened his eyes and held her hand against his cheek.

He slowly turned back into his Aesir form, Sophie found it rather fascinating to feel his skin change temperature so drastically under her hand.

‘Thank YOU for making me feel like I can trust someone indefinitely. For trusting me too with your own secrets.’ He said as he turned his head to kiss her palm.

[imagine-loki]

I'm still breathing, Chapter 8

TITLE: I’m still breathing CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 8 AUTHOR: fanficshiddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine a mutant has been living on the streets for years, until she is picked up by the Avengers. She’s taken to live with them so they can help her to discover what her powers are. Loki especially, takes an interest in her. The two become very fond of one another as they discover what her power is. RATING: M 

Red eyes flashed from the darkness. They were concentrating on Sophie. A low growl emitted from them, making Sophie gasp as she looked up to see them. Fear started to course through her veins. She turned and started to run, trying to escape in the darkness.

Loki tried to get his legs to move as he saw the frost giant chasing her. He found he couldn’t move, it was as if his legs were immobile. He tried calling out to her, screaming at her to run faster. But no words came out. All he saw was the flash of blue as it chased after the mutant.

It was too quick for Sophie and collided with her. Then everything went black. Loki screamed, trying to see what happened to her. When suddenly the frost giant slowly came into view. It was huddled over a body. Loki was able to move closer, until the giant stood up and turned around.

Loki let out a sob, as he was face to face with his frost giant self.

Loki abruptly shot up in bed. His body was sweating and he was trembling. He looked down at his arms, relieved to see they weren’t blue. That was the third night in a row he’d had that nightmare, he wasn’t sure why. But it was really grating on him.

After tossing and turning in bed for almost an hour, he gave up and decided to go to the library and read for a while. That always calmed his nerves down.

When he entered the library however, he was confused and surprised to find Sophie asleep on the floor by the sofa. He walked over towards her, the sound of his footsteps caused her to waken. She glanced up and smiled.

‘Hey, Loki.’ She said and closed her eyes again.

‘What are you doing asleep on the floor?’ He queried, raising an eyebrow up in amusement when she suddenly shot up and looked just as confused as he was.

‘I… Have no idea.’ She rubbed her eyes as she came to more, having been in a deep sleep prior to Loki coming along. ‘I was reading… On the sofa. I must have fallen asleep and… Fell?’ She went to stand up when a hand came in to view to help her. She took his hand and he hoisted her up to her feet.

‘Are you sure you’re not drunk?’ Loki teased, a smirk playing on his lips.

Sophie glared at him but laughed. ‘I am sure. I’ve never been drunk in my life.’ After wiping her clothes from any mess from the floor, she sat down on the sofa again and Loki sat next to her. ‘What are you doing up at this time?’

‘I couldn’t sleep.’ He shrugged, but Sophie could tell something was off.

‘What’s wrong?’ She asked.

Loki looked over at her and saw her genuinely looking concerned. He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. ‘I just keep having the same nightmare, or similar, for the last few nights. Where I am the monster that I am.’

‘Loki.’ She said in warning. ‘You are NOT a monster. Stop calling yourself that, or I will punch you!’

‘I’d like to see you try.’ Loki grinned, amused at her threat.

‘Don’t tempt me! I am getting stronger now, I’m sure I could stab the knife further into your stomach this time.’

Loki laughed at her cute threat, and reached out to trail his fingers up and down her arm. ‘I remember when the mere sight of me had you running scared.’ He said teasingly.

‘Well, that was before I knew you.’ She shrugged. ‘Stop trying to avoid the conversation. Why do you think you’re suddenly having nightmares?’

‘I have no idea. If I did, I would sort it out.’

‘What happens in them?’

Loki faltered, he’d been hoping she wasn’t going to ask that question. ‘I see a frost giant hunting down a human. When I reach them it’s too late, the giant turns and it is me.’

Sophie and Loki continued to talk through the night, but it didn’t help much as Loki still couldn’t figure out what his nightmares were about. Sophie wasn’t sure either, though she did try her best to help him. And he adored her even more for that. Her true personality was shining through more now she was with people she trusted. She was a kind soul, cheeky at times and playful. But tough. She was one of the strongest Midgardians that Loki had ever met, mentally and getting there physically. She and Loki were a good double act. He was already teaching her pranks to pull, good ones too, on the other Avengers.

The two ended up falling asleep together, with Sophie resting her head against his chest as he had his arm around her. In the morning, Thor was looking for them both and when he found them in the library, still sleeping peacefully, he smiled and left them alone.

When Sophie and Loki eventually woke up, Sophie’s hair was all messy making Loki laugh.

‘What?’ She asked sleepily.

‘Your hair is delightful, darling.’ He grinned, reaching up to smooth it out for her.

‘Yours isn’t much better.’ She grumbled.

‘Always so delightful first thing in the morning.’ He chuckled.

Sophie just grumbled again in response. She went back to her room to get changed into clean clothes and then she went for breakfast, meeting Loki there.

‘Nice to see you both awake after your stop out in the library.’ Thor chuckled, joining Loki and Sophie at their table.

‘Ohhh, a dirty stop out?’ Tony teased, sitting at the table with them too.

‘Thor you big blabber mouth. Neither of us could sleep, we went to read and then we ended up falling asleep there.’ Loki said as he glared sideways at his brother.

After eating breakfast, Natasha and Wanda dragged Sophie away to go shopping. Which she agreed to this time and actually went along.

Loki went to go to his room, but Thor caught up with him before he reached it. ‘Brother. I wish to talk.’

‘What about? I am not particularly in the mood to talk.’

‘But I bet you would be if I was Sophie.’ Thor grinned.

Loki stopped and turned his full attention to Thor. ‘Thor, if you were Sophie I would be deeply troubled.’

‘You know what I mean. She is what I wanted to talk to you about.’ Thor continued. ‘Is there more to you and Sophie than meets the eye? You both seem to have grown very close and I just wondered if there was more.’

‘What is that supposed to mean? Just because I have a friend who actually likes me more than you, you suspect something? Are you jealous that she has bonded with me and not you?’ Loki snapped.

Thor held his hands up in defence. ‘Loki, no need to get defensive. I was merely asking a question. I have not seen you so happy and relaxed in such a long time. I am happy for you and I actually was hoping there would be more to your relationship than the rest of us know about.’

Loki’s features softened slightly. Thor knew him too well though, he knew that Loki clearly liked her in more than just a good friend way. He always got overly defensive with that kind of thing. Never liked to admit his true feelings.

‘There is something I wanted to speak to you about.’ Loki sighed and motioned for Thor to go into his room.

The brothers sat down and Thor waited to hear what Loki had to say. It wasn’t often that Loki opened up to him about his feelings or anything really, so he was keen to hear what he had to say.

‘Maybe I do care for Sophie more than in a friendly way. However, I am sure having romantic interests is the least of her thoughts right now. And I am worried that I will end up hurting her.’

‘What? Why would you harm her?’ Thor frowned.

‘I once killed over 100 humans. She is a human. What happens if I lose control again? Or if my monster comes out.’

Thor knew what he meant by monster. His heart hurt for his brother.

‘Brother. You will not lose control again. You are in a good place now. I vowed to mother that I would look out for you and I will keep my word. I highly doubt the others would let you go off the rails either. And stop calling yourself a monster.’

‘I keep having these nightmares, for the past three nights. Where I am a frost giant and I kill her! Why else would I have them if it is not meant to warn me to stay away?’ Loki stood up, agitated.

Thor ran a hand down his face. ‘Loki. You will not hurt her. You’ve already saved her life, twice. I think these nightmares are stemming from your fear of committing. Or from coming to terms with your feelings for someone. There is nothing wrong with being scared. I was terrified when I first admitted to Jane my love for her. It’s natural, even for gods.’ Thor put his hand onto Loki’s shoulder.

‘But why would I dream of killing her? A bit extreme, is it not?’

‘Perhaps. But you have always been one for being extreme with your actions and emotions, Loki. Relax, enjoy your time with her. Tell her how you feel if you think it will help, or don’t.’ Thor shrugged. ‘But either way, we all know you would not harm her. Have you told her about your Jotun form?’

‘Yes, I have. She’s told me repeatedly that I am no monster.’ Loki said sheepishly.

‘Maybe you need to show her, so that you can see her reaction. That might put your mind to rest?’ Thor suggested.

That evening, Sophie could tell something was still bothering Loki. He was antsy and on edge, she’d never seen him like that before.

‘Are you alright?’ She asked when they left the living room after watching a film with everyone.

‘I… I need to show you something.’ Loki blurted out before he changed his mind. 

‘Ok… What is it?’ Sophie raised an eyebrow at him, confused.

‘Come with me.’ Loki put his hand out for her to take.

He led her to his room and put the Hulk force field up, making Sophie even more confused and unsure.

‘Like this isn’t weird or suspicious at all, Loki?’ She folded her arms over her chest.

Loki took a deep breath and ran a hand down his face. ‘I… I want to show you my true form.’

Sophie took a second to process what he’d just said. ‘You don’t have to prove anything to me, Loki. Why do you want to?’ She asked softly.

Loki looked a bit like a fish, as he opened his mouth but was unsure on what to say for a moment. ‘You are the first person here that I actually have a connection with. You are the only person to stick up for me. Especially after what I did to your planet. I think the nightmares I’ve been having is because I am scared that if you were to see my true form for some reason, that you may run for the hills. So if I show you now, then at least you can see me for the true monster I am.’

‘Loki, you are not’

Loki cut her off by putting his hand up. ‘Just, let me show you first. Please. I need to do this. You’ve opened yourself up to me, trusted me with your past. I want to share mine.’

Sophie had never seen Loki look so vulnerable before. She perched on the edge of his bed and nodded at him.

Loki looked down and closed his eyes. He concentrated and felt the cold engulf his skin. He let out a breath and opened his eyes after he heard nothing from the mutant.

Her eyes were wide, but instead of fear or disgust in them was instead awe. He wasn’t sure what to think. No words came from him while she stood up and walked towards him, taking in his appearance. She reached up to touch his face, but he stepped back.

‘I don’t want to hurt you.’ He said quickly.

‘You won’t… I kind of researched about Jotuns and learned that you will only give me frostbite if you want to.’ She said softly and stepped in close to him again.

Loki sighed and leaned down slightly, nodding to her. He closed his eyes when she reached out towards him and he let out a gasp when he felt her fingers touch his cheek.

Sophie trailed her fingers up and down his face, over the markings he had and across his forehead.

‘You are still beautiful, even in this form. Thank you, for trusting me to show me.’ She said softly when he opened his eyes and held her hand against his cheek.

He slowly turned back into his Aesir form, Sophie found it rather fascinating to feel his skin change temperature so drastically under her hand.

‘Thank YOU for making me feel like I can trust someone indefinitely. For trusting me too with your own secrets.’ He said as he turned his head to kiss her palm.

[jilyyall]

Animal Magnetism - Ch 10.

Edward Cullen was not a normal teenager; of that I was certain. But knowing that did nothing to stop the pull I felt towards him. And if what he was saying was any indication, he felt some strange pull towards me, too. It was like we were magnets struggling against hope to stay apart. I only wondered what would happen when we inevitably collided.

Chapter 10. A Modern Man. FANFICTION.NET / AO3 Intro/1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/

On Friday morning, the day before my plans to go to Seattle with Edward, I rushed out the door barely five seconds after Renee drove away and I still wasn't fast enough to beat him. He was holding open the door to his car before I had my front door locked. I laughed, shaking my head. He'd been waiting in front of my house to drive me to school every morning for two weeks and I had taken it upon myself to try to be waiting outside for him for once. I hadn't shared my goal with him, but he seemed to suspect; he was smirking at me as I hurried across the lawn to get out of the rain. It never seemed to bother him that he ended up with wet hair and damp shoulders every morning.

"How do you do that?" I demanded, slipping slightly on the wet concrete as I passed him. He caught me by the hand to steady me and held on, using our grasp as leverage to lower me safely into the seat.

He didn't mention my clumsiness – I thought he was probably used to it by now – as he started the car.

"Alice," he said simply.

"Are you ever going to explain that?" I eyed him curiously. He had been making cryptic comments for two weeks about his strange sister and her good reasons and her hunches.

I was watching his face, so I saw him glance at me out of the corner of his eye. He smirked. "I'm kind of enjoying keeping you in the dark," he admitted. "It's nice to turn the tables on you."

"Excuse me?" I exclaimed, scowling when he laughed. "I have truthfully answered every single question you've ever asked me! I do not keep my thoughts from you."

He had asked me a lot of questions, more even, I was sure, than I had asked him. It was overwhelming sometimes, the amount of information he demanded from me. Sometimes, the questions were so trivial and so inconsequential that I didn't think anyone had ever though to ask them. It was a shock to realize that he was curious because he had seen these details in other people's thoughts, details that no one cared enough to share, and he wanted to know all of those things about me, too.

"You edit," he accused. "It's very frustrating not to know what you really think."

"Most people think before they speak, Edward," I reminded him. "And besides, I barely edit."

"I've answered all of your questions, too," Edward pointed out quietly. It was true enough; ever since he'd started being forthcoming with me, he had patiently answered every question I had been brave enough to ask him. I wasn't always certain he was telling me the whole truth, though.

"You edit," I shot back. He cocked his head to the side, and didn't argue.

"Alice has a very useful ability," he finally said after several long moments of stubborn quiet between us and then he sighed ruefully. "Sometimes."

"You said you were the only one who can read minds," I remembered, my aggravation melting into curiosity. "What can she do?"

"Alice can see the future," he told me.

Ah. That actually made a lot of sense when I thought back to all the odd comments he'd made about his sister.

"She had a, what, a vision? That she and I would be friends?" I asked, remembering something he had said early in the week.

"Yes." He nodded, frowning. "And she's been telling me precisely when to arrive in the morning."

"Cheater." I narrowed my eyes at him playfully. "Did she tell you that I was trying to be out there before you arrived?"

"She did."

"I bet Alice saw me coming," I said smugly, thinking of the way they had both stared at me when I was getting my schedule in the guidance office that first day, before lunch. "Before you ever even smelled my blood, I bet she knew what I would be to you."

He hesitated, and the steering wheel creaked as his fists tightened around it. I saw the grimace on his face, but before I could demand he tell me what he was thinking, he shook his head. "Alice's visions are subjective. The future is always in flux; it changes with each new decision someone makes."

"What's wrong?" I asked. "Why are you agitated?"

It was the best description I could come up with, though I hadn't thought I would ever think to describe Edward as agitated. He didn't answer me, and we sat in silence until he pulled the car into the lot and put it in park.

"Did she see something about me?" I whispered, staring at him as he stared out the windshield. "Something you want to change?"

"It doesn't matter. I'm going to stop it," Edward muttered and leaned over the center console as he did every morning and laid his head in the curve of my neck, inhaling deeply. Desensitizing.

When he pulled back after a few minutes, he was smiling at me, but I could still see the slightest hint of tension in his eyes.

"Can I ask you a question, Bella?" he said.

"More questions?" I said, trying for levity, but still frowning over his secrecy. "What is it?"

"About tomorrow," he began, and I worried briefly that he was going to cancel on me before he continued. "Did you really need to go to Seattle? Or are you open to other options?"

"Oh." I shrugged. It didn't really matter to me, so long as he was willing to spend it with me. "Seattle was just an excuse to get out of going to the dance. I'm open to suggestions."

"Well, the weather is going to clear up later this evening and last through the day tomorrow," he said. "So I'll be spending the day away from the public and I was wondering if you would like to spend it with me."

"Sure," I said. Because, yeah, of course I wanted to spend the day alone with him; it didn't really matter what we were doing. "What did you have in mind?"

"I was thinking of taking you for a hike," he said.

I grimaced. Hiking? In the woods? Over unsteady ground and branches and slippery rocks? With a vampire who detested moving slowly? He smiled, seemed to guess what I was thinking.

"I'll move at your pace," he promised. "And I'll show you what I meant. About the sun."

He'd dropped that bomb when he was driving me home on Tuesday. Apparently, the sun didn't harm vampires – that was just a myth – but it did have some effect on them that he hadn't been able to describe to me.

"Hiking sounds great," I said brightly. He smirked at me, not buying my lie, and then sighed.

"I should have let you drive yourself this morning, but I couldn't stand to wait any longer to see you," he said. "Alice and I are leaving after lunch to go hunt. I want to curb the temptation as much as possible."

"I can get a ride home with Mike or Jessica, I'm sure," I told him, trying to hide my disappointment. I liked our car rides; I liked the conversations we shared during them.

"That's not necessary," he said. "I'll have Alice drop your truck off."

The first bell rang just then and I jumped, looking outside to see everyone heading towards their classes.

"Crap," I said, fumbling for the door handle. Edward was already there, holding a hand out for my books.

What could Alice possibly have seen about me that would make Edward so uneasy? It couldn't be anything that I did wrong. It couldn't be that I would betray them, accidentally let something slip. I would never do that. But what could it be? It gnawed at me all morning. I couldn't concentrate in class, couldn't feign interest in Jessica's retelling of her date with Mike the night before. Eventually, she stopped trying to engage with me, and I was able to concentrate on the enigma that was Alice Cullen's precognition.

He met me outside of my Spanish class, as he had every day this week, and gave me a confused look as he took my books in one hand, and my hand in his other. "Why does Jessica Stanley think we're in an argument?"

"Probably because I've been deep in thought all morning and haven't really talked much to her," I said.

"What have you been thinking about?" he asked warily, though I was sure he suspected. I turned and led him off the concrete path leading to the cafeteria, off into the soggy grass and under a tree.

"Did Alice see me… like you?" I demanded in a whisper. "Is that what you're so upset about?"

"It doesn't matter," he said.

"Has Alice ever been wrong before?" I asked. His hesitation was all the answer I needed: no, she hadn't.

"She will be this time. That's all that matters," he promised, and I could tell by the way he stroked a hand gently down my arm that he thought he was comforting me. I frowned and shook my head.

"But, Edward, what if I decide that I want it to happen? What if I decide that I want to be with you forever?" I said. "How do you plan to stop that?"

I wasn't stupid. I had only really, truly known Edward for a couple weeks; it was way too soon for me to be making decisions about immortality and spending forever – actual, real, unending forever – with him. All I knew was that I liked him a lot, and if my feelings for him kept intensifying, and so did his for me, well then we could discuss the possibility when it came up.

"Simple. I've already decided not to change you," he said firmly, as if that dissolved the issue.

I stared at him, wondering how it had come to this, to him making a decision on his own about my future, a future that his own clairvoyant sister had already seen coming. Settling on the realization that his decision not to change me hadn't erased Alice's vision, I frowned at him and spoke slowly. "Too bad you're not the only vampire I know."

"Carlisle would never turn someone who wasn't already dying," he said, completely missing the fact that I had been thinking of his entire family, not just his father. "And it won't come to that; I won't let anything happen to you."

"I could ask someone else," I said.

He froze, his eyebrows shooting up, and frowned. Apparently, he hadn't realized that I was debating my options rather than discussing my fears, and the realization made him unhappy. "You don't know any of them."

"I know of them," I pointed out.

"They would never..." He stopped short and hissed, that same low warning sound he had made when Rosalie had been glaring at me at lunch on Monday.

"Hi, Bella."

Edward scowled at the high, musical tinkle of a voice behind me. I turned slowly to see Alice Cullen, eyes a dim yellow like her brother's, standing several feet away, her black hair sleek and shiny against her pale-white skin even in the humidity.

"Hello, Alice. It's so nice to meet you," I said shyly, suddenly acutely aware of how frizzy my hair was, and then turned to Edward with one eyebrow raised. Hadn't he told me that Alice was certain she and I were going to be best friends? My future best friend would probably be willing to help me out.

He growled at me, baring his teeth, but I wasn't afraid of him.

"In a moment," he snapped harshly, flicking his hand impatiently at his sister to send her away. I wondered what she had thought at him.

"I'll see you on Sunday, Bella," Alice told me with a sure smile, totally unaffected by Edward's temper, and flitted away, her movement so smooth it looked as though she might have been a ballerina in another life.

"Bella, you can't be serious about this," Edward snapped. "Be reasonable. You don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm talking about possibilities, Edward," I said, trying to stay calm, trying not to throw the same temper back at him that he was radiating. "Not certainties. Some day, maybe… you don't know where we'll be, what we'll want."

"I don't care where we are, I won't let you," Edward snarled.

"Don't try to tell me what I can and can't do, Edward. If I have to remind you that it's not the early 1900s one more time, so help me…" I trailed off with a growl of my own for him. "You don't own me. You don't make my decisions for me. And you do not control me. You never will."

He glowered at me, and his eyes were tinged black with rage. "You don't know what you're saying," he snapped through clenched teeth.

"And you do not know what I'm capable of understanding!" I wrenched my books from his grip and turned on my heel to stalk away from him. "Have a good hike," I spat at him over my shoulder.

I was halfway to the cafeteria when I noticed Emmett Cullen and Jasper and Rosalie Hale watching me from near the gym. I bared my teeth in the silent snarl I'd seen Edward do before, and saw shock and amusement flash across three impossibly beautiful faces before I stalked out of their sight.

"You're not sitting with Cullen today?" Mike asked when I dropped into the seat between Jessica and Angela.

"No," I said angrily, and then had to work to cool my temper when I saw Jessica's eyebrows shoot up. "He's not feeling well, so his sister took him home."

My mood did not improve over the course of the afternoon, especially when I kept catching glimpses of Lauren Mallory in gym, sending me snide little glances. Apparently word had spread that Edward and I had an argument under a tree at lunch, and she felt the need to gloat. For the first time, when I sent the volleyball flying into the back of her head, it wasn't an accident.

Because we were mad at each other, I was surprised to see my big, ugly red truck in the parking lot - in the spot Edward's car had been - when I walked out after school. I supposed, even when he was upset with me, Edward didn't want to leave me stranded. It was better than I could say for some human boys.

I woke early Saturday morning – before the sun was fully up – to a tapping on my window. My heart stopped, and then slammed in my chest, when I rolled over and saw Edward's face on the other side of the glass. All too aware of my too-big sleep shirt with the hole at my thigh, I raced to the window on the tips of my toes and slid it open. He was hanging there, simply holding himself in place with what seemed to be no effort at all, his hands braced on either side of the window sill.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered when he slid inside, graceful and silent.

He looked around my room quickly, but I was certain it was enough time for him to take in more than I would have liked. I wished I would have taken the time to pick my clothes up off the floor last night like I'd planned. He kept a safe distance from me, and I wondered if he was worried he wasn't desensitized enough after nearly eighteen hours apart. Then, he met my gaze, and I saw the apprehension in them and remembered that the last words we'd exchanged had been in anger and frustration.

He had growled at me.

It hadn't really had much of an effect on me at the time, but later, replaying the fight on my drive home, it had only made me angrier. How dare he try to scare me so I would stop arguing with him? Regardless of the fact that it hadn't worked, it was unacceptable.

"I wanted to apologize for my behavior yesterday, Bella," he murmured. "I'm ashamed of myself."

"What are you apologizing for?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest. It was one thing for him to realize he needed to apologize. I needed to know that he knew why he needed to apologize.

He looked shocked. "Bella, I growled at you! As if you were prey! I will never do that again, I swear to you."

I nodded, but didn't relax my posture. "Is that all?"

He frowned, and sighed, and shook his head, clenching his jaw. "I shouldn't have spoken to you the way that I did. It was very disrespectful, and I hope you can forgive me. I can only promise to try not to do so again."

He was getting there, but he didn't seem to know what had truly angered me the most. I could see that he wanted to, though, and that he wanted to make amends. He wanted to make this work. I bit my lip; I could feel myself beginning to soften for him.

"That's a good start, but you can't make decisions for me, Edward," I told him. "Why don't you try to make decisions with me instead?"

He reached out hesitantly to touch my cheek. "I'm a product of my time, Bella, and I've been without a partner for the whole of my very long life. It's not easy to remember that relationships, and the expectations that go along with them, have changed drastically, but I want to work on it with you. Can you be patient and help me achieve that?"

Slowly, I let my arms fall to my sides as I studied his face. He did look properly ashamed and contrite. I wondered if he had endured hell from Alice all night. She had, after all, witnessed our argument first hand.

I decided to forgive him. Everyone, even a one hundred and twenty year-old vampire, deserved a second chance. Especially when he was recognizing the need to work toward changing himself, and promising to try. "Yes. I can help to modernize you."

Immediately, I felt all the tension and frustration I had been holding onto for the past eighteen or so hours slide away. For a split second, when I brushed his hand aside, he looked hurt, but then I stepped forward, into him, and wrapped my arms around his lean waist. I pressed my face to his cool, firm chest and felt him still and stiffen momentarily, before he wrapped his arms around me and held me to him. He buried his face in my hair and breathed me in.

"I don't like arguing with you," I mumbled against his chest in a very small voice.

"Neither do I," Edward said. "So let's take this as a lesson in communication, and try to limit how often it happens in the future."

"I can work with that," I told him.

We stood like that for a very long time. The sky outside was almost its usual grey instead of nighttime black by the time Edward drew back.

"I have to admit, I didn't only come here to apologize," he told me.

"Oh?" I raised my eyebrows at him, prompting him to explain.

"I was wondering if you still wanted to spend the day with me," he said softly, stroking my hair, "or if you were too angry."

"Well, I'm not mad at you anymore, so…" I said, trailing off with a smile.

"I'll be back at nine, then. There will be enough cloud cover still," he promised with a soft smile of his own. "Tell your parents. I want to meet them. I want them to know you'll be with me. Please."

"Okay," I said reluctantly, then stiffened in his arms. It was so easy for him to get in here; suddenly, I was terrified it wasn't his first time climbing through my window. "Edward? Have you ever been in my room before?"

"No. I may have been tempted at first, before I knew if you could be trusted, but I couldn't cross that boundary," he said.

"Good." My relief was like a tangible thing in the air around us.

Curiosity flashed bright in his amber eyes. "Why?"

Frantic, I cast around for a plausible excuse. There was no way I could tell him that I was just really worried he had seen the way I tended to spend my nights before drifting off to a fitful sleep: touching myself and wishing it was him.

"Because that would be creepy," I blurted out.

"True, it would. But that's not the only reason. Tell me," he demanded.

I could see that he was going to press me for an answer, and I was very much beginning to regret questioning him in the first place when he froze. He looked towards the bedroom door and then broke free of my arms still on his waist and stepped to the window.

"Your parents are awake. I'll see you soon," he said in a low whisper, and disappeared in the blink of an eye.

When my door creaked open and Renee peeked her head in, I was gathering my clothes from the floor and throwing them into the hamper in my closet. I would have to get better about that – I didn't want Edward to think I was a slob.

"Good morning, Mom," I said.

"I thought I heard voices," she said, looking around suspiciously.

"Oh, sorry." I nodded at my phone charging next to my bed. "I was talking to Madison. I didn't wake you, did I?"

"No." Renee shook her head and took a few steps further into the room, eyes scanning again, as if expecting to see a boy she'd missed on first inspection. "How is Madison?"

"She's okay, I guess." I shrugged. I had spoken to her a couple nights before, so I figured it was still probably true. "She and Conner are getting pretty serious, so she's happy, you know?"

"Bella." She sat on my bed, now, and looked at me sadly. "Honey, I want to talk to you. Are you doing okay?"

"Yeah, Mom. I'm fine," I said.

"It's just that I know you miss Phoenix and your friends there," she explained. "And your father and I know that we didn't give you much of a say in things before you and I moved back in here with him."

"Yeah, well. I mean… I'm your kid. Isn't that how it goes? You decide to pick up and move your life, then that means me too. Right?" I turned my back to her, scoping out my closet to see what I should wear today.

"Bella, look at me," Renee said, using a stern voice I so rarely ever heard from her, so I did as she asked. "I know how this place used to make me feel when I wasn't much older than you are. It's different for me now. I'm not so restless. I'm ready to settle down here and have a life with your father. But you've been so distant lately. Ever since we got here it's like all you do is go to school and then sit in your room, and I'm just so worried about you. If you feel like being in Phoenix is better for you, then we can talk about it. We can figure something out. Your father and I just want what's best for you."

I stared at her for a moment, dumbfounded. Why couldn't she have felt this way months ago? Actually, I was glad she hadn't felt this way sooner because then I wouldn't be with Edward now. I would be back in Phoenix, happy enough, believing that vampires were just scary monsters in stories. And how tragic would that be?

"I don't know, Mom," I said slowly, suddenly worried that I was about to be shipped away from Edward. "Forks isn't so bad, you know? It's actually… kind of nice."

"Forks is nice?" she repeated, inspecting me closely.

"Yeah! You know, I have friends now. Mike and Jessica and Angela and everyone, and they're really nice and they include me in things like La Push a couple weeks ago, and the Blacks, and I…" I paused, took a deep breath because I knew she had zeroed in on the way my face was growing red. "Mom, I don't want to go back to Phoenix anymore. I just needed to give Forks a chance."

How could I go back to Phoenix now? Sure, there was Madison, and I was sure there were still other people there who would talk to me despite the stupid mix-up with Dylan and Alana. But there was no Edward in Phoenix, could be no Edward in Phoenix because he couldn't live in places where there was sunshine all day every day.

She looked at me for a long while, and then nodded. She stood and walked over to me, placed her hands on either side of my face, and kissed my forehead. "You can tell me things, Bella," she said quietly. "You don't have to keep it all to yourself."

"Yeah, I know," I said. And I did know that. And it was probably the perfect opportunity to tell her about Edward. But I wasn't ready yet. I needed to clear my head first. "I need to take a shower."

"Okay," she said with a concerned frown. "I'll see you downstairs. I love you."

"Love you too, Mom," I said as she walked out the door.

I heard her footsteps on the stairs, heard her teasing my father for some mishap he had made in the kitchen while she was talking to me, and closed the bathroom door behind me, feeling guilty. I hadn't been fair to my parents lately. I had let them believe I was miserable this whole time and, sure, at first I was. But I was definitely not miserable anymore, hadn't been in a while. It was time to come clean.

I was downstairs, dressed in jeans, my only pair of hiking boots, and a long flannel, my hair twisted into a braid down my back, by 8:45. I could have been ready earlier, but I was putting off speaking to my parents. There was no point in lying to myself about it; I was a coward. I had never brought a boy home before. There had never been a boy to bring home before. I didn't know how they would react, but I could only imagine it would be painfully awkward for me. Edward would probably enjoy himself, though.

"Morning, Bells," Charlie said when I walked into the kitchen. He and Renee were sitting at the shabby kitchen table eating burnt toast and dry eggs and drinking too-strong coffee by the smell of it.

I nodded and grabbed a plain bagel out of the pantry, smearing it with cream cheese. I took a bite while I poured myself a glass of orange juice, finishing as quickly as I could there at the counter. It was now or never. If I didn't tell them before he got here, it would only be even worse, and so much more awkward. That, and Edward would likely never let me live it down.

"I have a date with Edward Cullen today," I blurted out as I rinsed my cup. Behind me, I heard a tiny cough as Charlie swallowed his coffee wrong. Renee cut off mid-sentence while telling a story about the dog who liked to sleep on the stoop outside of her new studio.

"What?" Charlie demanded hoarsely.

"How exciting!" Renee said.

"He's going to be here soon," I said, turning around to face them and leaning against the counter, gnawing on my lip. "He wants to meet you."

"I don't like it. He's too old for you," Charlie said quickly.

"We're in the same grade, Dad." I rolled my eyes, though technically he was right. I supposed it was all a matter of semantics, but I didn't really consider him too old for me; Edward may have held the knowledge of a century's worth of learning, but he was still seventeen, wasn't he?

"Charlie!" Renee hissed, and turned to me with a wide grin. "We're so happy for you, Bella."

"Which one is he?" Charlie asked, his red face scrunching unhappily as he tried to picture all of the Cullens.

"The youngest one, with the reddish-brown hair," I told him. Edward looked younger than the rest of his family, but Charlie was still turning steadily more purple. "Dad you like the Cullens. You said so yourself. You didn't talk to Billy for over year because he was rude about them."

"That was before you were dating one of them," he grumbled, but grew quiet when Renee swiped at his arm with the newspaper she had been scanning.

"Is this the same Edward who drove you home from Port Angeles the other week?" Renee asked, eager for more information. "Is he your boyfriend?"

"I don't know, Mom," I said, my voice pitching upwards close to a whine. I really didn't want to do this right now, especially not with Charlie looking like he had a whole egg lodged in his throat. "Yeah, I guess, but it's kind of new, so please don't make it weird."

"I knew it!" Renee exclaimed triumphantly. "Is he cute? Oh, I bet he's cute!"

"Well, you'll find out in a few minutes. He's picking me up at nine," I said, glancing at the clock. Only five more minutes.

"Where is he taking you at nine o'clock in the morning on a Saturday?" Charlie demanded, but his blood pressure was visibly dropping as he calmed himself, his face slowly fading back to his normal coloring.

"We're going hiking." When both of my parents paused and exchanged a glance, I scowled at them. "I don't know where, so I'm not sure when we'll be back."

"You're going hiking?" Charlie repeated, blinking stupidly at me.

"Yes," I said through gritted teeth. "The Cullens are all really into the outdoors. Especially when the weather is nice."

That was their story, anyway. I figured it would be best to stick to it.

"You must really like this boy," Renee said and I glared at her, my face burning.

There was a knock at the door and I hurried to answer it. It had only been a little more than two hours since I'd seen him, but it was like taking a breath of fresh air when I opened the door. Then I saw the amusement twinkling in his topaz eyes and my stomach dropped. It was anyone's guess what was going through Charlie and Renee's minds right now.

"Don't do that," I hissed. "Tune them out or something."

He only smiled at me and said, at a normal volume, "Good morning, Bella. Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, thank you. How did you sleep?" I said, glancing over my shoulder to see that Renee was peeking around the kitchen doorway to get a glimpse of Edward.

"Oh, come on in!" Renee said, rushing forward when she realized I had spotted her.

"Yeah, make yourself at home," Charlie said, sounding less sincere as he followed Renee into the foyer.

"Chief Swan, Mrs. Swan, I'm Edward Cullen," he said, brushing past me to step inside as if I wasn't intentionally trying to keep him from my parents. "I wanted to formally introduce myself and thank you for allowing me to take Bella out today."

"Edward, please call me Renee, and this is Charlie," Renee said, laying a hand on my father's arm. "Oh, here, let me take your jacket."

"No, don't take off your jacket," I said quickly, and grabbed his arm to stop him when he started to comply. "We're leaving in a minute."

"There's no rush," Edward said, but wisely did as I asked. "The trail isn't going anywhere."

"Which trail are you hiking today, Edward?" Charlie said. "Nothing too dangerous, I hope?"

"Oh, there's a trail on the Elk Creek Conservation Area," Edward said lightly. "It runs along the creek and it's got some really lovely views. Bella will be perfectly safe with me; it's just too nice a day to spend indoors."

"I know which one you're talking about," Charlie said with an approving nod, then tilted his head in my direction. "Nice and easy."

"Dad," I said with a pained grimace.

"Charlie," Renee said, coming to the rescue. "Let's not keep them. Edward's right; it is too nice a day to waste."

"Yeah, Edward, let's go," I said, putting my hands on his biceps and trying to push him out the door. He humored me by taking several steps back toward the door.

"Ah, just a minute, Bell," Charlie said, stopping me with a hand on my arm.

"I'll wait outside, Bella," Edward said. "It was really nice to meet you."

"Oh, you too, Edward. You're welcome here anytime," Renee said, almost giddy under Edward's smile.

"Not any time," Charlie corrected sternly. "Daylight hours, when Renee and I are home."

"Yes, Charlie, of course," Edward said sagely.

"Dad!" I said again, and turned to Edward with what I was sure was a very red face. "I'll be right out, Edward."

He was smiling, laughing softly as he stepped out onto the front porch.

"What?" I demanded, turning to face my parents with a scowl.

"I want you to take this," Charlie said seriously, placing a small black canister in the palm of my hand. Inspecting it, I realized it was a canister of police grade pepper spray. "You remember those self defense moves I showed you, right?"

"Oh, my God. That is so unnecessary. Edward's really great," I said, but I slid the pepper spray into my pocket anyway, knowing it was the quickest way to get out of the house. "Can I please go now?"

"Yes," Renee said before Charlie could protest, stepping in front of him to cut him out of the conversation. She gripped my arms in her hands and kissed me on the forehead. "He seems very sweet and so handsome. You have a good time."

"Thanks, love you, bye!" I said, turning on my heel and running out the door before either of them could say anymore.

Edward was waiting by the passenger's door as he did every morning, chuckling at the expression on my face.

"Don't say anything. This is all your fault," I said, but I was smiling too as I slipped past him and slid into the car.

ffn/AO3