#and even though I’m happy and I love my life
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I'll look After You
Pairings: Satoru Gojo x fem reader (reader is a mom)
Summary: You longed to hear from Satoru, After an epic night hooking up in a club bathroom, sure you'd been strangers, but he has your number, he made you feel so special... but... he never contacts you again. Ten months later, you have a beautiful baby named Reign, with those exact blue eyes. You never saw him again, couldn't even find him, so now, you are living your life as a single mom. Messy bun, dark circles, exhausted, you run into Satoru one day, and he sees her, his baby girl, and sees you struggling, he knows then, you're what's been missing in his life.
CW: Going to be sweet and emotional, Satoru is a freaking doll, misunderstanding led to him not knowing (nothing is kept from anyone on purpose) Fluffy long oneshot where Satoru falls in love with reader and his little girl. Gojo being a dad and being cute! Will have smut at the end as all my oneshots do lol, so MDNI, and flashbacks to the original bathroom smut (will list all the warnings when it comes out!)
Preview below! Comment to get added to the taglist when it's out!! (Soon!!) <3
You often wondered about him, Satoru was his name.
As you look down at your baby girl, with her brilliant blue eyes while she’s cooing happily, giving you a gummy little grin, you wonder what he’d think if he knew about her. The random guy at the bar you gave your number to after hooking up in a bathroom, the guy who never called, the guy with no social media of which to speak. The guy you never, ever saw again.
Your baby’s father, the best thing that ever happened to you, surely, but also it was very difficult, being a single mom, you’d have to go back to work soon which you were dreading, spending sleepless nights up feeding, changing her. It had been a rough pregnancy, and a shocking one at that, people had questioned you over and over, some mentioned not having her.
But something in you knew you could do this, you could have this baby, you’re broke as fuck but she has all she needs, and she makes you so happy, but those eyes are unmistakable. No one has eyes like that, except her and her… well was he really her 'dad'? You wonder if he’d run ten million miles from you if he knew, or would he have been okay with it?
It’s odd that just a night of fun, alcohol and being on antibiotics created this amazing little girl, but you can’t be upset, not when she brightens your world. But you still ache at times, for her to have a dad, you hope you’re enough. You wonder about him though, the bright energetic man, the one that had made you feel more in one evening than anyone ever.
The last man you’d been with.
Yes, it’s been that long, Reign was two months old, so you’re damn near at a year, you say it’s because you’re so busy, but something deep in you knows that you felt something for him, deeper than the obvious physical. Something about how he looked at you, at how he laughed, at how he made you feel so special.
You assume it must have been some act, clearly, here you are, alone after all. You both only knew each other’s first names, it’s true, but he had that number. Maybe it wasn’t all you thought it was? Maybe he just was that sort of guy, the one that made women think they’re his everything with one of his kisses, maybe you were just too drunk, and he was too pretty.
You blink a bit, shaking the haze thoughts of him as you yawn a bit, exhausted from Reign keeping you up all night, her tummy had been hurting. You’re sleepily putting things in the cart, baby items, groceries, the essentials, you catch sight of yourself in the mirror above the produce, wincing then. You have a messy bun and are in pajamas, god help you if you ever wanted to meet a guy.
‘Oh hi, I have a baby with a random blue eyed dude from a bar, I’m broke as fuck, and I wear pajamas to the store. Wanna date?’
Yeah. That would go over well.
“It’s… it’s… you!?” You sleepily look up then, so exhausted you barely register the six foot three man for a moment, then suddenly it all hits.
He stares at you, those blue eyes, the eyes your baby has, wide now, his pouty pink lips dropped open. He’s just as gorgeous as you remember him, like it’s some dream, you feel weak then, chest rising and falling as your breaths come too quickly. He steps closer to you then, he hasn’t seen her yet, nestled in her little car seat on the cart, you’re panicking.
“Do you even remember me? Oh my god, that night my phone broke, and I had just got it, they couldn’t transfer the numbers! And I tried to look you up? But I couldn’t find you… and I never saw you… and then- fuck I’m rambling.” He laughs nervously, swiping his hand through his snowy locks. “Forgive me, please… what I mean to say is… Hi?”
“Hi…” Your baby whines then, and Satoru pauses, blinking and you move to the side then, he steps closer when Reign opens her eyes, grinning at him.
Satoru’s heart pounds in his chest, his entire world tilts on its axis, he was already so thrown off by seeing you again, the girl he hasn’t been able to stop thinking of, but now… he looks at you in shock, you look exhausted, but so beautiful, your eyes tear up then, he watches your shoulders slump, then he looks back at the baby, realization sinking in.
“She’s… is she… there’s no way…”
“She’s yours, I only hooked up with you for the past… year.” You manage to say softly, right in the middle of the fruit aisle, Satoru was finding out you have his baby.
“You did this alone?” He says then, blinking back emotions for a girl he barely knew, but who now has a part of him, a part he wants to know so badly suddenly, shocking him.
“I had no clue who you were, how to tell you, even if so, it’s not your responsibility okay? I take care of her just fine, I make it work.” Satoru’s heart breaks then, seeing how tired you are, seeing the endless baby items and cheap toilet paper, a cheap bottle of wine, is that all you get yourself?
You did this alone, you have his baby alone, altering your life while he’s living his just the same, partying with his best friends, working and living a luxurious life. Satoru was rich, and it’s clear his baby and his baby’s mother are struggling, and he’s here doing what? Could he have tried harder to find you!? Could he…
“We’re okay, you don’t have to worry. I’d never come for you for anything, I am happy being her mommy.” You say with a tired smile, reaching to touch her little chubby cheek, and Satoru has never seen anything so beautiful, the two of you.
He’s felt so empty for this year, is this what he was missing?
“Can I… please… can I know her?” He asks, gulping now, and you blink in shock, nodding quickly.
“I would love that.” You can’t stop your tears then, sniffling and shaking your head. “Please, let’s talk outside of the produce aisle?” You whisper, he nods quickly, unable to take his eyes off you, off his baby.
Coming sooon- based loosely on a request for @bunheadusa hehe, prob gonna be long I can't help myself.
perma tags- @alt--er--love @cuntphoric @seeing-stars-alt @nanasukii28 @labelt-san @makingtimemine @aldebrana @n1vi Perma Gojo tags: @chiyokoemilia @haruhatake @strychnynegirl <3
#gojo x reader#gojo smut#taglist open#jjk smut#gojo fluff#@divider by @si-eunnis#jjk x reader#jjk gojo#satoru x reader#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x f!reader#wip#satoru fluff#jujustu kaisen#jjk fluff#satoru x you#satoru x y/n
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Hello there! I was wondering if you would be willing to write a request that I thought up? No pressure of course. I'd love to read your rendition of it but if you don't want to that is absolutely and of course fine.
So I am a pretty emotional person, and especially when I am pmsing or on my period its a very common sight for me to be silently crying over a sad reel or a photo of a puppy or sobbing loudly if I re-read my comfort angsty fic. I really crave physical affection and coddling during my period which sucks cause I live with 2 dormmates who sleep 2 steps away from me and aren't very touchy but are very loving. Like today my friend showed me a photo of her holding a puppy who was nuzzling into her sweatshirt, claws out and hooked in her sleeve and all and ofc I started crying. My other roommate was like don't show it to her she's on her period, she will cry. But then she was like, on second thought do, I enjoy her tears 💀.
On to my actual request now, sorry for rambling 😅
So I was wondering if the reader had a similar tendency with her emotions and hormones around her cycle, how the marauders would deal with it you know? Would they be used to it, asking if its just a leaky faucet to let some emotional pressure out (that happens a lot with me lol) or actual crying. If they would be freaking out no matter how often it happens. Or how they would coddle her.. very curious to see if you pick this up! Thanks for reading nonetheless <3<3
Haha thank you for your request angel <3
cw: reader who menstruates, mention of animals in televion industry, Sirius is not good with tears
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 644 words
You try not to make a spectacle of yourself. You really do. You hide in the corner of the couch, feeling the burn of your sinuses and eventually letting a couple of tears roll down your face without lifting a hand to wipe them. Your throat squeezes. Your temples ache.
Despite your best efforts, all it takes is one tiny sniffle to get the attention of your boyfriends.
James’ arm tightens around your shoulders. His cheek squishes into your head, voice heavy with sympathy as you both look at the TV. “I know, angel. It ends alright, though, yeah?”
“All he does,” you choke out, watching the dog on the screen through blurry vision, “is wait for his owner to come home every day. That’s his whole life.”
“It’s an advert for dog kibble!” Sirius protests.
You shrug, weeping, and Sirius gives a short laugh tinged with anxiety. Remus sets a hand on his knee.
“Sweetheart,” Remus says gently, “I’m sure that in real life, that dog is very well taken care of. He probably gets plenty of attention and time with his owners. He’s famous, right?”
You nod, though you can’t help a tiny sob as the on-screen dog sits straight up at the sound of a key in the door. “Right.”
“Right.” Remus gives you a kind look. “You okay? Not upset about anything else?”
“Yeah.” You sniffle weakly. “M’okay, just. My head hurts.”
James makes the sort of syrupy pitying sound that has your throat contracting all over again. “Do you think it might be the crying, lovie? It’s not the first time that commercial’s been on today. You could be dehydrated.”
“I don’t know,” you say, quietly. “I don’t think so.”
“I’ll fetch you a paracetamol and some water to be sure.” Remus stands, patting Sirius’ thigh consolingly when the other boy shifts off his lap with the movement. He touches the top of your head as he walks behind the couch, and James kisses the spot as though to second it.
“Baby.” Sirius turns to you with a stern look. “First the Lorax last night, and now this? The ad’s not even on anymore; it’s finished.”
“It’s just…” You swallow, fighting to keep your voice solid. “Do you think all pets feel like that? When their people leave to go to work?”
“No, honey,” James consoles you. “I think they’re happy to amuse themselves while we’re gone.”
“They’re perfectly fine,” says Sirius, not unkindly. “Stop crying.”
“Don’t be mean.” James gathers you closer. “She’s on her period, she’s entitled to some crying.”
“It’s like the hiccups, James. You’ve got to scare it off.”
“That’s barbaric.”
“What’s barbaric is the television industry that keeps making our girlfriend burst into tears at random points in the day!”
“You guys.” You’re nearly laughing now. With tears still wet on your cheeks, Sirius hardly looks comforted. “Don’t fight.”
“We’re not fighting.” James is quick to mollify you.
“Oh, dovey.” Remus returns with your painkillers, bending to wipe your face with a put upon frown. “Are they upsetting you?”
“God, no.” Sirius reclines back against the cushions, blowing a breath up towards the ceiling. “What chance have we of doing that, when there’s wealthy dog actors to do it for us?”
You take the water Remus has brought you, downing the painkiller. “Do you really think the dog gets decent money from the advert?” you ask as he pets your hair dotingly.
James ponders this. “Even if it’s not very much, I’d bet his owners put as much of it back into him as they can. He probably sleeps on a memory foam dog bed.”
Sirius is watching your face distressedly. “Baby,” he nearly pleads. “It’s okay.”
“No, that’s good,” you manage, voice a quiet squeak as your eyes fill again. “I just think that’s a really nice life for him. He deserves it.”
#poly!marauders#poly!marauders x reader#poly marauders#poly marauders x reader#poly!marauders x fem!reader#poly!marauders x you#poly!marauders x y/n#poly!marauders x self insert#poly!marauders fanfiction#poly!marauders fanfic#poly!marauders fic#poly!marauders fluff#poly!marauders imagine#poly!marauders drabble#poly!marauders blurb#poly!marauders scenario#james potter#james potter x reader#sirius black#sirius black x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#poly!marauders oneshot#the marauders#marauders x reader#marauders era#hp marauders
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He listens while you yap
pairings: boyfriend! enhypen x reader | listener x yapper trope
caution: be prepared for their randomness (•‿•)
author's note: This is my first time trying something like this, and I thought, why not switch things up? If you enjoyed it and want more like this, just let me know! Happy reading!
permanent tag list: @sol3chu @chlorinecake @13tter @jung1w0n
HEESEUNG
You explained an article you found earlier and made an especially interesting point. “So, apparently, there’s this theory about how—wait, are you even listening?” you paused mid-sentence then glancing up at Heeseung.
He was just staring at you the entire time.
“Am I talking too much?” you asked, feeling embarrassed. Was he bored? You might have been talking for hours...well, you were.
“I’m sorry,” you added. Feeling guilty.
Heeseung tilted his head slightly. His lips formed a gentle smile that quickly made you feel comfortable. “No, not at all. I’m just listening,” he said gently. “You always have the most interesting things to say.”
You blinked. For a moment, you were caught off guard by his words.. “Really? Because I’m pretty sure I’m just rambling about random stuff half the time.”
He chuckled softly while shaking his head. “Not to me. You make even the most ordinary things sound extraordinary. Like you’re breathing life into them.”
“Come on, that’s a bit much,” you teased though you were shy with his words.
He shook his head slowly. “It’s not. You could talk about the lifespan of jellyfish, and I’d still want to hear every word.”
You laughed. “Seriously? Jellyfish?”
“Yup,” he said with a grin. Heeseung’s eyes crinkling at the corners. “I don’t think you realize how much I enjoy hearing you talk.”
You looked at him for a moment. Your laughter turned into a warmer feeling. “You always know how to make me feel special, right?”
Heeseung smiled more. “I’m just telling the truth. You’re the one who makes everything feel special.”
Your heart swelled at his words, and you couldn’t help but grin. “You’re too good at this, you know. No wonder everyone’s always talking about how sweet you are.”
He lightly shrugged. “Only for you.”
JAY
You plopped down next to Jay on the couch, “Last night, I dreamed I was a bottle of ketchup,” you said, not even glancing at him.
Jay didn’t even look up from what he was doing, though you knew he was listening. “Oh?”
“Yeah. And you were mustard. Which is weird because you’re usually mayonnaise in my dreams.” You said it matter-of-factly.
Jay glanced over at you and gave a small smile. Your boyfriend didn’t even question it anymore.
“Mhm. We were sitting on a picnic table, minding our own business,” you continued, staring blankly ahead. “Then this kid comes over, grabs you, and squeezes you all over a hot dog.”
“Of course,” Jay muttered, his smile still there.
“And then they grabbed me and put me on french fries,” you said, your voice now lighter. “But even though we were on different foods, we ended up on the same plate.”
Jay gave you a soft look. “Of course you did.”
“Yup. It’s like… no matter what, we always end up together,” you said nonchalantly. “Even if we’re on different things, we’ll always end up on the same plate.”
Jay didn’t react much, just looking at you with that same fond smile. “Ketchup and mustard, huh? That’s one way to put it.”
“Yep.” You nodded as if you were completely confident in the analogy. “It’s like fate, you know?”
Jay leaned back. “Fate. Of course. You’re the ketchup, and I’m the mustard.”
“Exactly,” you said, kicking your legs a little. “I mean, I’m obviously the star of the show, but you do make a good sidekick.”
Jay laughed quietly to himself, shaking his head. “You’re the star, hm?”
“Of course,” you said, completely unfazed, “but you still belong next to me.”
“Right,” Jay replied with a small, affectionate smile. “Next to you, always.”
And just like that, he continues to look at you with the same smile as you continue to talk, absolutely in love with you.
JAKE
You were pacing around the room, hands gesturing wildly as you went off about the movie you’d just watched. “And don’t even get me started on the plot twist—like, I saw it coming from a mile away! But, still, how could they—ugh, I can’t wrap my head around it!”
Jake sat on the couch with one arm stretched across the backrest. “Go on, tell me more,” he said, his voice smooth and teasing.
“Okay, but can we talk about that scene? The main character falls—of course—and she’s like, ‘Save yourself!’” You rolled your eyes dramatically. “Like, girl, what? Just get up! Run with your friend! Why are you making it so dramatic?”
“Mhm,” he hummed, clearly holding back a laugh.
You kept going, utterly oblivious to his gaze. “I mean, realistically, if I fall, I’m grabbing your arm and dragging you down with me. We’re both going down. There’s no ‘save yourself’ moment. You’re coming with me.”
Jake chuckled, shaking his head. “Good to know.”
“And the friend?” you continued, throwing your hands up. “She’s just standing there, like, ‘Noooo!’ for too long. Like, hello? Help her up and run!”
Jake leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “You’d definitely survive in a movie.”
“Oh, absolutely,” you said, pointing at him. “I’m not wasting time with emotional goodbyes. We’re both making it out, or no one is.”
Jake grinned, his voice dropping just slightly. “So, you’d save me?”
You froze for a second before narrowing your eyes. “Obviously. I’d even ensure you didn’t trip in the first place.”
He laughed softly. “And here I was, thinking you’d be the one tripping on purpose just to get me to catch you.”
Your jaw dropped. “I would NOT!”
Jake smirked. “You totally would.”
“I’d be saving both of us!”
“You’re hot,”
You froze. “What?”
“You heard me,” he said.
Of course, he had to flirt.
You crossed your arms tighter, fighting back a smile. “Okay… what? That’s random. You’re distracting me.”
“That’s kind of my thing, isn’t it?” Jake grinned wider, tilting his head. “Admit it, baby.”
You shook your head with a sigh. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” But the way your heart fluttered at his words? You couldn’t deny it.
SUNGHOON
You paced around the room as you got lost in recounting the day. “And I visited my parents today! I missed them so much…it was the best.”
Finally, you stopped mid-stride and turned to face him, hands on your hips. “Okay, are you even listening? Or are you zoning out again?”
You have seen your boyfriend zoning out often, especially in the mornings. You wouldn’t be surprised if today were one of those days.
But he chuckled softly, wanting to assure you. “I’m listening. I always do.”
You tilted your head. “Even when I’m rambling about stuff that’s probably unimportant?”
“Especially then,” he said, his dimples appearing as his smile grew wider. “I like hearing you talk. It makes me happy.”
Your arms crossed, though you couldn’t fight the grin pulling at your lips. “You like when I yap on and on?”
“Not the yapping part,” Sunghoon teased. “It’s the way you’re so happy when you talk. You’re glowing, and I can’t look away.”
That made your cheeks heat up. “I’m just telling you about my day.”
“I know,” he said softly. “But you light up when you talk about the things you love. I could listen to you all day. It’s comforting.”
“Comforting?” you echoed, raising an eyebrow. Oh?
He nodded as his eyes began to soften. “Yeah. It’s like you’re letting me see a part of you no one else does.”
Your lips curved into a smile. “I never thought I’d be comforting while going on about my life.”
Sunghoon’s smile grew. “You’d be surprised.”
SUNOO
“…and I don’t even know why they didn’t just say that in the first place! Would it have been so hard? Honestly…” you trailed off, glancing at Sunoo, watching you with the softest smile.
You blinked. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Like what?” he asked, his smile widening.
“Like you’re completely entertained by my nonsense.”
“Because I am,” Sunoo admitted without hesitation. “I love it when you yap.”
You raised an eyebrow. “Yap?”
“Yeah.” He nodded. “You go off about the most random things, and I love it. It’s my favorite background noise.”
You playfully gasped. “Background noise? You’re saying I’m noise?” How dare he?!
“Sweet noise,” he corrected, grinning cheekily. “The kind I never want to tune out.”
You rolled your eyes, but there was no hiding the blush on your cheeks. “So you want me to keep going?”
Sunoo nodded eagerly. “Of course! Why do you think I never interrupt you?”
Tilting your head, suspicious. “What if I talk about like….I don’t know... talk about socks?”
He laughed softly. “You don’t realize how cute you are when you get all caught up in your little stories.”
You tried to fight the smile tugging at your lips but gave up quickly. “Fine. But you’re stuck with me talking forever.”
Sunoo’s eyes sparkled. “Lucky me.”
JUNGWON
You were sprawled on the carpet while Jungwon sat next to you, quietly listening with that ever-patient expression.
“…and I don’t get it! Why would you even bring a cat to a grocery store? What’s the cat gonna do? Pick out your produce?” You threw your hands up, exasperated. “Next thing you know, they’ll be pushing their pets in carts like it’s totally normal.”
Jungwon blinked at you. You can see his lips twitching.
You squinted. “You’re holding back a laugh, aren’t you?”
“No,” he said, lips pressed together tightly.
“Yes, you are!” You pointed at him accusingly. “You’re trying so hard not to laugh right now.”
He cracked. His shoulders shook as he let out a small giggle. But then it escalated. His hand flew to his stomach, and he was laughing so hard that he tipped backward.
“HAHAHAHAHA OH MY—AHHHH HA HA HA HA!”
You sat there, wide-eyed. “Is it that funny?”
He nodded, tears forming at the corners of his eyes as he tried to catch his breath. “It’s not even the story! It’s you! You’re so serious about the ridiculous things—AHHH HA HA AHH HAHA—I can’t!”
You crossed your arms, pouting. “I was making a valid point.”
“I know, I know!” Jungwon wheezed, wiping his eyes. “But you looked so offended! Like, personally attacked by the cat in the store.”
“Well, someone had to say it!”
Jungwon shook his head. “You’re too much.”
You huffed. “I don’t know why I put up with you.”
“Because you love me,” he teased, his laughter finally calming down.
You rolled your eyes but smiled despite yourself. “Maybe.”
“Definitely,” he said, still grinning. “Now, please. Keep going. I need another good laugh.”
NI-KI
You were going on about how your day went, and Ni-ki, leaning against the doorframe, watched you as he kept grinning. He wasn’t saying much but teasing you with every detail you mentioned. “Wow, you don’t stop talking, huh?” Ni-ki said with a smirk.
You raised an eyebrow. You do not want to back down. Especially to him. “I’m just sharing my day, okay? You don’t have to listen if it’s too much.”
“Oh, I’m listening,” Ni-ki said as he stepped forward. “I just didn’t know you had this much to say. You’ve been talking for hours, baby.”
You shot him a look, unfazed. “Oh, please. You know I talk plenty, just not to you.”
Ni-ki chuckled, pushing himself off the doorframe and walking over to you. “I think you talk to me more than you realize. You just don’t want to admit it.”
You scoffed, crossing your arms. “I don’t know about that.”
“Uh-huh. You’re giving me the full lecture today. You can’t hide it,” he teased. “And honestly, I’m enjoying it.”
You rolled your eyes, trying to act indifferent. “Of course you are; you love it when I talk.”
Ni-ki shrugged dramatically. “Guilty as charged. Your yapping is one of my favorite things. Keeps me entertained.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at how easily he could get under your skin, even with his teasing. “Well, I hope you’re ready for more because I’m not stopping anytime soon.”
“Bring it on,” Ni-ki said with a wink, clearly looking forward to hearing all of it.
#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen oneshots#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fics#enhypen x reader#heeseung x reader#lee heeseung x reader#heeseung imagines#park jongseong x reader#park jay x reader#jay x reader#jay imagines#sim jake x reader#sim jaeyun x reader#jake sim x reader#jake x reader#jake imagines#park sunghoon x reader#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon imagines#kim sunoo x reader#sunoo x reader#sunoo imagines#yang jungwon x reader#jungwon x reader#jungwon imagines#nishimura riki x reader#ni ki x reader#ni ki imagines
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Omg really? Wow, thank you so much. That's honestly amazing to me, considering this was one of the hardest for me to write in Smoke Eater. 💞
(But after reading your wonderful review, thank you for making me cry. 🥹💗💗)
First of all, please don't apologize for the heartfelt thoughts you want to share with me. No matter how long or short, I love hearing what you think about my writing, and this is genuinely one of the best reviews I've ever received, because I can tell it came from the heart.
What's crazy is my mom and I also used to watch Chicago Fire together when she was trying to recover from surgery (where she had terrible complications and wasn't well for a long time). It became her comfort show, and I was happy to introduce it to her/have that bonding time where it kept her from thinking about her pain. But I'm so glad you thought to come here to perk yourself up after a rewatch.
honestly I have so many thoughts for each wonderful chapter but I would feel super guilty for spamming :’) this chapter in particular though, hits me harder than anything i’ve ever read before — not in a bad way!🤍
lol girl that's the best kind of spamming. I'd never be upset with that! 😂 Oh good, I'm glad it doesn't hit in a bad way. I was concerned about that for readers when I was first posting this part of the story. 💙
my mom had epilepsy, and I was her caretaker pretty much my entire life. I connect so much with this story because it, feels like i’m reading a mirror, if that makes any sense at all. with all the doctors and the worrying, it’s written so authentically, which is understandable after reading your author’s note. i’m so sorry you’ve experienced such difficult hardships and losses yourself honey, I offer my sincere condolences. and i’m sending you the biggest hugs 🫂🤍🤍
I'm sending you the biggest hugs right back, friend. I'm so sorry about what your mom went through, and what you went through too. Being a caretaker is not easy. I've seen it enough in my family that that's what I drew from in order to write this, so I'm glad it felt authentic to your experience. 🫂💞
now these lines/parts specifically had me crying like a baby lol. december of 2021, my mom had to have surgery at the start of the month. her recovery was going a little slow, but well. however she passed away overnight, 2 days after christmas, completely unexpected. the day before she had been doing so well too— she had more energy and was more mobile without needing as much assistance. came to find out later that’s something nurses call a surge? :/ either way, those moments in particular really tugged at my heartstrings ❤️🩹
I'm so sorry for your loss, my friend. It is blind sighting when it comes so unexpected like that. I haven't shared this publicly, but something similar happened with my grandfather this past December. His health declined suddenly, to the point we had to take him to the hospital. After seeming to get better after a few days, he went downhill even harder, and he passed away in mid-December. It's not the same thing as your situation, but I understand the feeling of "why did this happen like this?" But now he's at peace with my grandma. And your mom is free from her pain and discomfort too. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
this line too. I felt this way for so long after my mom died. I didn’t get the final cause for a while since she passed at home and not at a hospital, and to this day I wish I could go back. wish I could’ve done something different. but SUDEP (or, sudden unexpected death in epilepsy) is completely unpreventable so far. I just find it so cruel that this illness I spent my whole life helping her with, ended up taking her anyway and nothing I did mattered in the end. so reading that line, how she broke down, and everything she had been holding in, it really made my heart ache but I also felt less alone in a way.
And I'm sure you did everything you possibly could, just like the reader in this story. 💞 I didn't know about SUDEP, but I have a family member who takes medication for his epilepsy, so I'm going to be reading up on that. I'm so glad that this simple line made you feel less alone in any small way -- I also thought when I was writing that it not only fit what the character was going through, but that other people who've been caretakers for a family member like this would be able to identify with this feeling as well.
everything that followed, it’s like reading a reflection. I shutdown and just went through the motions afterwards too, but ohhh how nice it would’ve been to have a dean ❤️ his support, how he takes care of her, it’s so heartwarming. and it’s really comforting to read. <3
It's that awful "autopilot" thing that somehow allows us to get through the aftermath, in a way, right? If only we could all have a Dean to support us in those moments. Somehow, reading hurt/comfort fics help me feel better too though. 💓💓
a lot of my family distanced themselves afterwards which, it is what it is. that being said, the sentiment in this story of family isn’t always blood resonates with me a lot. my support system is really small, but they chose to be there for me unlike my blood relatives so, that theme in this story means so much — the way dean’s chosen family shows up for her as well, it’s so sweet. 💖
Ugh really? I'm sorry to hear that. 💙💙 But thank you for pointing that out -- that is the overarching theme of this story, a la SPN style. 🥹 Your chosen family can be just as powerful, if not more, than your blood family. And in this story, Dean's family is basically "adopting" the reader/you into it. 💕
I guess the gist of what i’m trying to say, is I wholeheartedly adore this series and it truly means so much to me 🤍 I appreciate your work so much, and I love the unique feeling each piece of your writing brings 💗💗 I know I may sound like a broken record but truly I don’t think I can ever put into words how much I love your blog. you are an absolute sweetheart, truly a light peeking out between cloudy skies 💞
Wow, I really did tear up of happiness. Thank you. 🥹🥹 I appreciate you right back for reading this story and connecting with it like you did. And I'm so glad that you enjoy my blog!! I've only been here on Tumblr for about 2 years actively, but connecting with people like you is what's keeping me here, and honestly gives me energy to write and express myself when I'm going through hard times.
This chapter specifically was very difficult for me to write for multiple reasons, as you saw in my AN, but again it makes me all the more grateful that this is the chapter you connect with the most. I'm very sorry for your loss though. I'm really touched that this story can give you some small comfort. 💞
(And no it's not too much. Thank YOU for taking the time to share this with me.)
Smoke Eater - Part 11
Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader
Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real.
That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.
🔥 Series Masterlist
Word Count: 5,400 Tags/Warnings: Major angst warning. But also major hurt/comfort.
Part 11: “Heart of the Home”
You sat very still.
Your hands were gripped together in your lap when the doctor entered. He was tall and lean and blonde, and he would’ve reminded you of your boss, except this man had a kinder face.
You were sitting on the edge of your grandfather’s bed, hoping the doctor would say the bloodwork and scans came back fine. That they wouldn’t need to admit George into the hospital for further testing. That he could go home in the morning.
But your life had never been quite that easy.
“Okay, George. I’m sorry, but we need to admit you,” said the doctor.
He explained that while the malignant tumor of his cancer had been removed last year, the scans that had been done last month hadn’t been able to detect the bright spots now formed on George’s lungs and lymph nodes.
The oncologist would have to confirm, but you all knew where this was headed. Likely those “bright spots” were tumors.
George nodded slowly at first, taking it all in. He asked what his options were, as far as treatment.
“Your oncologist will go over those options with you,” the doctor replied. “We’re going to move you up to Oncology shortly.”
George thanked him.
And you sat very still.
A hand fell on your arm, finally earning your gaze. George’s face was oddly calm, though the worry in his eyes was for you. You realized that he’d gently called your name, though you hadn’t heard him. Your ears were ringing.
His mouth parted to tell you something, but nothing came out. So instead, he tugged you into his arms, and he heaved a long sigh.
“I guess we’re here again,” he admitted. He let out a chuckle. “The Lord does like his tests…but maybe that car accident was a blessing in disguise, huh?”
You heard his voice, but your mind was buzzing—mainly with the doctor’s words, and with a bone-deep feeling that threatened to consume you.
Your car, your fault. Options, again. Here again.
Your fault.
When you didn’t answer, George pulled away a bit to give you a questioning look.
“Sweetheart?” he tried. You laid a hand on his arm.
“You still haven’t eaten dinner, have you?” you asked. Neither had you, for that matter. “I’ll get us something that isn’t rubbery turkey.”
George blinked at you, confused, with a growing edge of worry.
“Isn’t Dean getting your meds? Why don’t you wait for him to—”
“I’m fine,” you said, already getting up to grab your purse. “I’ll be back.”
George called your name again, but the ringing in your ears was now pulsing in time with your heartbeat.
You made your way down the hall to the lobby at a brusque clip, even with your neck brace on. You didn’t see Dean, but he certainly saw you as he was walking back into the hospital. Frowning, he followed and called out to you.
You slowed when you saw him, and he soon caught up with you. He rested a hand on your back.
“Hey, where you goin’?" he asked.
“We haven’t eaten in a while. I’m going to the cafeteria,” you said. Though you seemed distracted, your eyes meeting his only briefly. It triggered a small spidey sense running up Dean’s spine.
He gave you your prescription pain medication, which you took with a small “thank you.”
“Everything okay?” he asked. “How’s George doing?”
“Fine. He’s resting,” you said. And by the look of you, that seemed to be true. But he spotted the tremble in your hands when you took the pill bottle package from him. It made him stop you when you tried to keep walking down to the cafeteria.
“Okay, you wanna run that by me again?” Dean asked.
You frowned, and your brows knit together. “What?”
“Is there something going on?” he pressed.
You sighed, but you didn’t answer him. You looked exhausted, and like you’d rather swallow your own tongue than speak. You shook your head and laid a hand on his wrist.
“I’m fine. Dean, thank you for everything you did tonight, but you still have to work tomorrow. Go home, get some rest,” you said.
You turned from him again. That was your first mistake. He reached out and grasped your hand to stop you.
“Hey, wait a minute,” he said.
“What?” you said in irritation. Your second mistake was not being able to look at him.
Dean was frowning in earnest now. Worry clawed in his gut, which was also telling him not to let you walk away from him. His grip shifted to hold both of your arms and move directly in front of you. He dipped his chin, trying to get you to meet his eyes.
“Come on, sweetheart,” he said gently. “I need you to talk to me.”
You inhaled a shuddering breath. A wave was rising inside you, threatening to pull you into its undertow. Your eyes burned, red and shining. Dean finally saw it when you raised your head, what little you could. Your mouth began to quiver, looking into his eyes. And it was done.
You could no longer be still.
Dean held you when you fell apart in the hallway.
Dean called out of work the next day to stay with you and George. Gordon would be acting Lieutenant until his next shift, and Dean was sure the man would take full enjoyment out of it.
He couldn’t care about that right now though. He felt that his place was here, being your quiet wall of support while you and George and the oncologist talked about treatment options.
“Normally, at the stage we’re in, I would be recommending chemotherapy,” said Dr. Benton.
“Normally?” you echoed.
“At the rate this is progressing, the treatment would have to be aggressive,” he said. His gaze focused on George. “However, at your age, and the current state of your overall health…at this point, I don’t think the rigors of treatment would be worth diminishing your quality of life.”
“What are you saying?” you asked. Your voice cut like a whip, earning the other men’s gazes.
George was the first one to lay a hand on your arm. “You know what it means, honey…he’s saying it ain’t worth it.”
“Of course, it’s worth it,” you retorted. With your brows furrowed and lips pursed, your eyes went from him to the doctor. “Just because he’s older, we shouldn’t even try? Is that what you’re saying, doctor?”
At that, even Dean drew closer to lay a hand on your back. Meanwhile, George squeezed your arm.
Benton shook his head gravely. “That’s certainly not what I’m saying.”
“How much time would I get, if I started treatment,” George asked, before you could volley further with the doctor.
Benton met the other man’s gaze.
“I’m going to be honest with you, George. You may get a few more weeks, or even a few months. But that is a best-case scenario.”
Dean drove you all home that day, after George decided to formally waive treatment. Both men knew you were angry in your silence, but neither one wanted to press you. Dean was too wary, and George was too tired.
Once he was settled in bed, you hadn’t even left his room yet before you grabbed a notepad off his desk and wandered into the hall. You started to make a list of things you still needed from the grocery store, among other things. Dean took that piece of paper out of your hands.
“Good. I’ll handle this,” he said. “Meanwhile, you can get upstairs, take a shower, take your meds, and get some sleep.”
You frowned at him. “You haven’t slept either, Dean.”
“I’m used to it,” he said, giving you a wink and a slight smile. Overnight shifts could be a bitch at a firehouse, but Dean was no stranger to having his sleep interrupted.
“Listen to him, honey. He’s speaking sense,” George called from inside his room. The bedroom door was still open. He was settling into his bed while trying to stifle a cough. He sipped at a cup of water you’d brought for him.
Still, you looked reluctant. Dean held your arms and pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“Come on,” he said. “You were in an accident yesterday. You’ve had one hell of a night. You need your rest, or you’ll be no good to anyone.”
And if you pushed yourself much more, he worried that he’d have to take you right back to the hospital. Dean would rather not have that scare so close to the last one.
He brushed your cheek with gentle fingers. With the limited mobility your neck brace provided, you did your best to look up at him. Your eyes were softer.
“Okay,” you breathed.
“Okay? All right, good,” Dean said. You held onto his jacket for a moment, leaning against him.
“Thank you,” you whispered. You felt the burn of tears behind your closed eyelids. A few of them squeezed past and slipped down your cheeks. Dean held your face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs.
“Hey, I’m here, all right? Just let me help you,” he said. “You can lean on me when you need to.”
“I haven’t had that in a long time,” you admitted. “Part of me doesn’t know how to lean.”
“I get that,” Dean said. But you both knew that there was a long and difficult road ahead. He knew he didn’t have to remind you of it. “Whatever you need, you just tell me, okay? If nothing else, I’ve got a strong pair of shoulders.”
Somehow, you smiled. You pressed your forehead against his chest and inhaled deeply, to steady yourself.
“That you do, Lieutenant.”
You left for your room soon after, but not before you brought him down to you for one more tearful kiss.
Dean then watched you climb up the stairs to your room and nearly went up to help you, but he heard George call his name. Dean ventured back into George’s room and heeded his beckoning hand.
“You hungry? I can scramble some eggs or something before I hit the store. I think I saw two more left in the carton,” Dean said. George shook his head.
“Come ‘ere a sec.”
Dean took the hint and sat on the edge of the bed.
“I just wanna thank you for everything you did yesterday. Everything you’re still doing for us,” George said. He looked exhausted, but whatever he wanted to say was important enough to fight off sleep. He clasped a hand on Dean’s arm.
“You don’t have to,” Dean replied.
George huffed. A smile made his eyes gleam brighter.
“I knew you were a special one, Dean Winchester. Knew it the night I met ya, on your very first date with her.”
Dean blinked, but his pause drifted into a reserved smile.
“How’s that?” he asked.
“Well, I’ll be honest. When I heard that black Chevy rumble like hell’s wheels onto the driveway, I thought I might have to worry about you,” George chuckled.
Dean’s lips quirked.
“But no, it wasn’t that. It wasn’t the pretty flowers, or our mutual love of killer sharks,” George quipped, making Dean’s smile more genuine. “It isn’t your job either, or the fact that you saved her. I just believe that you can see a man’s mettle in his eyes…and I saw it in you when I shook your hand that night.”
Dean took that in for a moment. His hand flexed over his knee. Then he met George’s gaze, though he didn’t know what to say. Sometimes though, honestly was the best bet.
“I’m sorry for what you’re going through,” he said at last. “I can’t imagine…”
George let out a breath through his nose. “I’ll tell you a secret.”
He pointed to a picture frame on his bedside. It was of him and his wife, Sophie, when they were around your age and Dean’s. The couple were sitting on a pier that hung over the edge of the lake in their hometown.
She held him from behind, with her arms wrapped around his neck. Her long hair was being carried by the wind, getting swept into George’s eyes. He was smiling too hard to care.
“I’m ready to smile like that again,” he said. He had tears in his eyes, but he was already lighter at the thought. “I know it’s selfish…but I think I’ve missed her long enough.”
Dean paused. Then he cleared his throat past a small well of something he couldn’t name. He wondered if his dad ever had thoughts like that.
“Well, I’ll let you get your rest,” he said. “I’ll be back.”
George nodded and gave Dean’s arm a squeeze. “All right. Drive safe. Don’t hit any goddamn trees.”
He shot Dean a knowing wink, and it almost had the younger man laughing. George’s sense of humor was something else.
Dean then left George to rest. He made sure he had his wallet, keys, and your grocery list before he left your house and went back to the car. He checked his phone and saw a missed call…from Cas.
Dean was reminded again about Azazel, the kingpin who might’ve ordered a hit on his family. Along with the recent murders and arsons, and the connection from one of the victims to your company, Savage & Co.
Dean returned the call as he climbed into the Impala.
“Dean. Everything all right?” Cas asked. “Sam filled me in about the accident.”
“Yeah, everyone’s okay…well, not really. I’ll explain later,” Dean replied. “Listen, about what we talked about at the bar.”
“Yes.” Cas said gravely. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t go to your father about this yet.”
“Funny, I was thinking the same thing.” Dean sighed. “My girl just got some real bad news. I know you gotta keep digging into Savage & Co., but can you keep her out of it?”
“Is she all right?”
“Yeah, more or less…it’s her grandfather.”
“Ah, I see,” Cas said. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Thanks, man. I’d rather her just focus on what she needs to do right now, you know?”
“I get it. And believe me, we’re keeping the investigation of Nick Savage quiet for now,” Cas said. “But if we find something, or worse, if I can’t…I’ll likely need to question her. She works directly with Savage, and from what I can tell, she’s instrumental in bringing in and maintaining several of his major accounts.”
Dean stopped at a red light and took a moment to rub a hand over his tired face, rubbing his eyes. “You don’t really think she’s got any idea of what that asshole’s into.”
“I’m not saying she does. But in working so closely with him, perhaps she’s noticed things about her boss, and the company. Things she’s kept to herself, out of self-preservation.”
Dean frowned. He didn’t want to think about shit like that. It made his stomach churn at the thought of you working for someone who might be doing business with a crime lord, let alone Azazel.
“Well, when that day comes, give me a heads up, okay?”
“Will do.”
“Thanks, Cas.”
Dean offered to take another day off to help you, but you wouldn’t let him. He needed to go back to work, and you were able to arrange working from home for the next few weeks.
Even Nick couldn’t refuse to accommodate you in a situation like this. He knew very well that if he pushed you too hard, you’d go directly to HR.
So he backed off, and told you to take as much time at home as you needed. It allowed you to put him, and that afternoon in his office, away from your mind to focus on taking care of your grandfather.
Though you called your best friend the day you got home from the hospital, Andréa didn’t come by your house to see you and George until the end of the week. She cited mounting projects at work and some kind of tiff with her cousin Meg, but it all sounded like excuses to you.
However, she was gracious enough to bring dinner for the three of you on a Friday night. She cut up with George like normal, and even got him laughing, until a coughing fit forced him to stop. It also took most of the joy out of the rest of the evening.
While George went up to his room to rest, Andréa later joined you in the kitchen. You were washing the dishes, trying to focus on what you were doing. But your mind was buzzing continuously with future tasks and worries. Always, tasks and worries.
“How are you holding up?” Andréa asked. She rubbed your back, and you gave her a slight smile.
“All I can do is make him comfortable, for as long as possible,” you replied. There were tears in your friend’s eyes, but she dabbed them away with the back of her hand.
“What do you need? Anything, you just tell me,” she said.
It was a little easier for you to contemplate leaning on Andréa. You had been friends with her for years, and she was like another daughter to George.
On the other hand, asking Dean for help always made you hesitate. What you two had was still so new. You worried that this was too much for your relationship, too fast.
“Well,” you sighed as you wiped your hands dry on a kitchen towel. You didn’t exactly want to talk about it, but there were things you had to start planning, even if you didn’t know the exact timeframe.
However, as soon as you opened your mouth to reply, Andréa’s cell phone rang. She held up a finger to you and checked it. To your surprise, she actually answered it.
“Hey, babe,” she replied with a smile. You heard Benny’s deep voice on the line, asking a question. “Yeah, I’m still here. I’m probably leaving soon though.”
She continued her conversation for a few more minutes, but you didn’t hear anything after that. A tension headache was sharp behind your eyes, while anger (yes, anger) rolled hot under your skin. Your lips pursed. You busied yourself with straightening up the kitchen until she continued her call for another few minutes.
“Sorry about that,” she said, finally turning her attention back to you. “So what do you need?”
You put away the last dry dish and turned to her coolly.
“Nothing.”
Andréa frowned. She knew there was something off with you, but her furrowed brows betrayed her confusion.
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing,” you repeated. “Don’t you need to head out, anyway?”
“No, I was just…what’s up with you?” she asked.
“What’s up with me is my grandfather’s dying!” you snapped. You left her in the kitchen, precisely so that she’d follow you out. You grabbed her purse for her and went to the front door, where you stepped out.
Andréa was dismayed and confused as she followed you out onto the porch. She raised her brows at you when you shut the door and crossed your arms at her.
“I know you, and this isn’t just about that. What’s the problem?” she asked.
“You can’t seem to detach from your boyfriend for more than five minutes to just be my friend. That’s the problem,” you replied. “But why should I be surprised? Like always, you’re too wrapped up in yourself to consider anyone else.”
Her brows knitted together; she looked hurt by your words, but also defensive.
“How can you say that when you’ve been exactly the same way?” she accused. “Since you met Dean, I’d be lucky to see you once a week—”
“I call you every week,” you began, counting the list with your fingers. “You’re always busy, but you never give me a day that works for you. And when we do make plans, you usually cancel. Why? Because you’re going sailing with Benny. You’re going to a restaurant, hours away, just to try the new sushi bar beer garden, or whatever the hell. Or you’re going on an impromptu road trip, or you’re planning a summer trip to Greece. Give me fucking break, Dre.”
By now she was frowning angrily, her arms crossed. “You’re mad at me because I have a life?”
“No. I’m happy for you that you found someone. I really am,” you said. “But we clearly live in two different versions of reality. I just don’t have the time or the energy to entertain yours.”
You knew you were being too harsh. You felt incredible guilt as soon as it all left your mouth…but part of you also felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest. The problem was, you still felt heavy. Just in a different way.
Both of you were crying when Andréa left your house.
All too soon, a week became a month. In that time, Dean called you every day to check on you. He spent most of his evenings with you and George when he wasn’t on shift. And when he was, sometimes Meg would drop in.
She understood your argument with Andréa, and she respected you for taking a stand when you needed to. She even confided you that she’d had similar frustrations with her cousin lately.
But Meg wasn’t your only visitor. Ellen had come a few times to bring you lunch and dinner, even breakfast, though you hadn’t asked her to. You realized then how close Dean must be to his friends at the firehouse, along with the Harvelles; Ellen also refused to take any money from you for the food.
By the end of the month, George mainly spent his days sleeping. Pain medication made his days nearly painless, but not without struggle. You were doing your best to care for him while continuing to work full-time from home. You were also exhausted, though you refused to admit it.
Today was a better day, however, because George was awake. He was also more aware of his surroundings than usual.
He stopped you from adjusting his pillow so you would sit down on the edge of his bed. He took your hand in his, brushing a thumb over the back of it.
“I’m okay with this, you know,” he said. You pursed your lips, but he stopped you from whatever you were going to say. “I don’t want to leave you. You know that…but I’m so damn proud of you. Your Gram was, and still is…”
Your lower lip wobbled as you tried and failed to keep your tears at bay. They stung in your eyes and slipped past your defenses, down your face.
“The house is yours. But if that’s too hard for you, just sell it,” he said, heaving a deep breath. “It’s just the bones. You’re the heart. And you always have been.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but not a sound would come out. You held his hand with both of yours and stared down at them. Until his voice once again commanded your attention.
“I always thought…moving to the city ruined my daughter. That we should’ve stayed in Lebanon. That maybe I gave her too much freedom, and I failed her somehow along the way,” George said. His eyes were heavy with old heartache. And yet, they soon began to lighten.
“But the day we lost a daughter, we gained one too,” he said. Then, he chuckled a little. “And I know I never failed with you, sweetheart.”
That proved to be too much for you. He pulled you into his arms like you were still a child, and he held you for a long time while you cried yourself out.
Though he eventually spotted Dean hesitating in the doorway. He’d probably let himself in with the spare key you’d given him.
George raised a hand from your back and silently beckoned Dean inside his room. He was getting tired, drifting off thanks to the morphine.
“Hey, lookie there. The boyfriend’s here,” George whispered with a bit of cheek. You sucked in a breath and raised your head, wiping at your eyes before you turned around. Dean met you with an attempt at a smile and a gentle hand on your back.
“Just got out of work?” you asked. He’d been on a 24-hour shift, and you’d missed him. You stood and stepped into his welcoming embrace. He dropped a kiss on your forehead.
“Yeah. I’ve got the next couple of days off,” Dean said. He greeted George next and asked him if he needed anything.
“Just some water,” the older man replied.
“I’ll get it,” you said with a sniff. “Need to start dinner too.”
“I already brought some food. You like Italian, right?” Dean said, with a subtle smile. It earned your sigh and a grateful smile. He knew very well that it was now one of your favorites. Italian meatballs always reminded you both of your first date.
“Thank you,” you said, grasping his hand. He squeezed yours with a nod, before he let you go.
When you were out of earshot, George cleared his throat past a wet cough. Dean reached over and grabbed him a tissue. George took it with a nod. Again, he encouraged Dean to come closer.
“I’m not worried,” George said, between deep breaths. “You know why?”
Dean just stared back for a moment. He genuinely had no idea what the man might say next.
“Tell me,” he said.
“My granddaughter’s strong. Always has been, because she had to be,” said George. “But you’re gonna be there when she’s not.”
Dean considered the weight of that charge. The anxiety in his chest felt familiar; like the day he got his badge at the Fire Academy, knowing then the responsibility he held in his hands.
That’s a lot to put on just three months of knowing this girl, came a more selfish thought. It sounded a lot like the guy he used to be, not too long before he met you.
But when Dean thought about you, and what you’d begun to mean to him…
He realized that he only had one answer.
“Yes, sir. I am,” said Dean.
George gave a tired smile. “Good man.”
And that night, an agreement was made.
In the morning, your grandfather was gone.
Dean held you through what he thought was the worst of your heartbreak. But after that dour morning, it was like a switch flipped inside you.
In the days after George’s death, your shutters came up. You threw yourself into checklists and task after task—in funeral arrangements and planning and contacting distant relatives and friends.
This was your failsafe. Your version of “autopilot.” And these things needed to get done, after all.
But Dean worried when he no longer saw the softer side of you. Like your heart had been wrung dry.
He inevitably had to go back to work, but in between the demanding hours of his schedule, he tried to get you to slow down. He saw the warning signs of you running yourself into the ground. He just didn’t know how to help you land.
So Dean picked up slack where he saw it, often without you asking him to. He began fixing the house, one section at a time. He enlisted Benny’s help, since he actually had a small construction business. Dean even paid for the materials himself without you knowing.
And one sunny afternoon, he took a break from repaving part of the cracked and uneven driveway to grab a beer inside. You were sitting at the kitchen table with stacks of papers all around you, your cellphone on speaker as some kind of elevator music continued to ring on a loop.
“Can you believe I’ve been on hold with the funeral director for 20 minutes?” you told him in irritation. But you didn’t truly take sight of him until he came back from the kitchen.
He wore a familiar ensemble of jeans and black undershirt with a plaid shirt, rolled up to his elbows. He was covered in a fine layer of sweat, and his hands were dusty and stained from his work on the driveway. Dean looked tired, and that made you feel guilty.
Meanwhile, he frowned and popped open a beer. “You want one of these? Looks like you could use one.”
You shook your head. With a sigh, you hung up the phone. You’d try calling again later. Instead, you focused on the next item of your checklist for today.
“Food. Because we’re gonna need to eat after the service,” you inclined your head. “Okay, still need to come up with a list of caterers, because I don’t think I can cook for that many people.”
Dean nodded at that. “Let me talk to Ellen. She’ll give you a good price, and her food is good.”
You looked up from your notepad and considered him thoughtfully. You wouldn’t have thought to cater from a bar, but he was right. Ellen had great food at the Roadhouse.
“Okay, I’ll call her,” you said.
“No, I’ll call her,” Dean insisted. He set down the beer on the table and leaned his palms flat on its surface. “Sweetheart, I told you I’d help you with all this. You don’t have to do it by yourself.”
“Dean, you’ve done enough,” you replied. Your brows drew together stubbornly. “You’re paving my driveway right now, for God’s sake! This is my responsibility, not yours.”
Dean frowned, making you sigh. You leaned back in your seat and crossed your arms.
“Look, we’ve only been dating for three months,” you said. And in your mind, a good chunk of that time had been spent in the worst hell of your life. “This right here? It’s a lot. I’m not expecting you to deal with all this…”
You bit your lip, and your gaze fell away from his as your insecurities took hold. The thoughts that had been plaguing you every night since this all began, on the night of the car accident.
“And…if you’d rather take a break from us for a while, I’d understand,” you said.
Your voice was more collected than you felt. But that didn’t make it any easier when Dean stared back at you, mostly incredulous. You even thought you saw a thread of hurt there, and it made your heartache worsen.
Dean came around to your side of the table. He dragged a chair back and sunk into it, facing you directly.
“You think that’s the kind of guy I am?” he asked.
You immediately shook your head. You weren’t trying to upset him, or imply that he wasn’t reliable, or trustworthy, or whatever was running through his head. You were just trying to be realistic.
You’re so pragmatic it hurts, as Andréa had often told you.
“Dean, it’s not that…” you began, a bit helplessly. “I just—”
“Just, nothin’.” His chair scraped toward you as he reached out for your hand. He made sure you looked him in the eyes when he said this next part.
“I’m not leaving you with this.”
Your gaze met his, though you desperately tried to keep your heart from rising into your throat.
“I’m not leaving you,” Dean said. His tone, his eyes, his hold on your hand was firm.
For a moment, you stared at him, unblinking, even as tears swam in your eyes.
He’s not leaving you.
Not like everyone else in your life.
You were grateful. Too grateful, even, for words.
When you finally broke down into tears, Dean realized what an idiot he’d been. Your wall of stoicism had been just that—a flimsy wall. Now it was shattered, and so were you.
It scared him just how much, as he gathered you onto his lap and into his arms. You didn’t seem to care that he was dirty and covered with sweat. You clung to him strong, and he held you back just as tightly.
“No matter what I did, it wasn’t enough,” you confessed. “You save people all the time. I couldn’t save anyone in my life.”
Dean frowned. He cupped the back of your head, and he felt your tears sliding down his neck. His voice was thick with emotion when he was able to reply.
“Oh, baby. It’s not your fault.”
“I can’t…I can’t do anything. Anything that matters.” Your voice was a broken whisper. It damn near broke his heart.
“Now you know that’s not true,” he said. “I’m not gonna let you lie to yourself like that.”
You trembled and heaved with sobs, and he continued to hold you.
Just be there, Sam had told him, when Dean had called him from the hospital. Sam reminded him again last week, when George finally passed.
Is that all I’m supposed to do? Dean thought. His brows furrowed, but he tried to hide his frustration.
He was used to people depending on him. He led a team. Before then, he’d looked out for Sam all his life. Dean had never had to help someone get through this kind of grief though. He just wanted to help you, in whatever way he could.
Because he was worrying, just like you. That whatever he did, it wouldn’t be enough.
But he couldn’t leave you.
I can’t, and I won’t, he thought. So he took a breath, and he said the first true thing that came to mind.
“You’re the strongest woman I know, you know that?” Dean said. He spoke low and steady, but with the conviction he felt. “And that’s a tall order, considering some of the badass ladies I’ve got in my life.”
A smile tugged at his lips when he considered people like Ellen and Jo, Jody and Donna. He might’ve lost his mom, but he and Sam hadn’t lacked when it came to influential women in their lives.
“But I saw it the day we met. I see it every time we’re together,” he continued. “You work hard as hell. You take care of everyone around you…”
You were still quiet, trying to stifle your crying.
Dean let out a breath. “Man, if you only knew how much you’ve been helping me. Keeping my damn feet on the ground with this whole…arsonist mess my dad’s been investigating. Digging up the past, my mom, the whole damn thing.”
With a sniffle, you uncurled from him, just enough to reveal your face. Your grip on his shirt loosened, your palm flattening on his chest. He held your hand there and turned his lips to your forehead. He sensed that you were calming down. That you were listening.
“That matters to me,” he told you.
You nodded and tightened your hand on his. “Me too.”
Your voice was still shaky, but it sounded a little stronger.
“See? You might as well face it.” Dean grinned. “You’re a badass chick with a big heart.”
You snorted in response. Your lips even twitched at a smile. He spied it when he looked down at you. And you rested easier against him as your tears subsided.
“Thank you,” you whispered. He dried your cheek with a brush of his hand.
“For what?” he asked.
“For staying.”
AN: So first off, I'm sorry for the gritty "reality" of this one. It's just where the story took me, though it serves a purpose narratively and for both the reader and Dean's character development.
But also, I think this has just been on my mind, since both my grandmother and great uncle (brother and sister) died within a year of one another due to different forms of cancer. My great uncle passed in May of this year, and my grandmother two years this past October.
Again, I'm sorry if this one was too heavy, but art does imitate life and this was probably my brain trying to express those emotions I couldn't fully make sense of at the time. George will be missed, but will still be felt in the rest of this story, as I'm sure any of you who've lost close family members will understand. 💙
Next Time:
The identity of Azazel will finally be revealed in Part 12. But first...
You nodded. “By the way, it was nice of Sam and Eileen to come. And Meg and Cas.”
Dean smiled.
“They can be your people too,” he said. “If you want ‘em to be.”
You couldn’t help it. Your tears brewed and bubbled over. And you moved slowly across the couch to twine your arms around his neck. Dean’s lips tugged at a smile, and he welcomed you with an arm wrapping around your waist.
Both of you were still wearing the same clothes you’d been wearing all day; you in your black dress and Dean in his slacks and white buttoned-down shirt, though by now without the jacket, and the shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
You were infinitely exhausted. But one thing had become clear to you over the past few weeks.
“Thank you. Thank you for today, and for every day since we met,” you said shakily.
Keep Reading: PART 12
Dean Winchester Masterlist
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Bunni that lighter x virgin reader was so GOOD??? YOUR BRAIN SO BIG?? it got me all embarrassed reading it, I had to take breaks in between cause the image of soft dom lighter is just so abgssngausgahstshh???? (I was also blasting ‘Like You Mean’ It by Steven Rodriguez when I was reading ur fic like oh god this song fits lighter so much 😳)
Aaaanyways I was wondering if you have any hcs for the day after lighter takes readers first time or any after care that he’d do? Also bit of a tangent but do you think lighter is the type to have cheesy nicknames for his partner like idk…sugar? Pumpkin? Or would he go the normal babe and doll type
Sorry it’s a bit long, I’m just happy to see lighter writers you all are a blessing thank you for the food 🤲🏼
🍓Hello lovely! Sorry I took so long to get to this, I'm p sure the hype around that fic is over, but this has been on my mind for so long and I just haven't had the motivation. I got some now, though, so here it is! (this is less headcannons and more a whole fic in bulletpoints lol) I hope you enjoy <3
TW: Day after; Alludes to previous sexual intercourse; Grammar Errors
Info: Lighter x Reader; Fluff; Headcannons
-You wake up to sunlight filtering in through the small crack between Lighters blinds, the warmth on your face a kindness that calls you to stir to life. There's a heavy weight across your middle and on your chest, accompanied by a different type of warmth -- human warmth.
-Your eyelids flutter open and, of course, you see your beloved partner Lighter curled up into your chest. He looked so peaceful resting like this, like all his worries had melted away from his mind and into the sheets until he woke up.
-You bring your hands up to play with his fluffy hair, smiling when he huffs a bit in his sleep, burrowing himself further into your chest if that is possible. Even in sleep he was trying to find ways to get you closer to him...
-Though he'd technically gotten you as close as possible last night if the dull ache inside you was telling enough. You could feel the sting in your hips already, and you would certainly limp a little when you got up, but you wouldn't trade it for the world.
-His green eyes blink up at you after a while of playing with his hair, foggy and glazed from sleep. He still finds it in himself to smile affectionately at you, and you can't help but smile back.
-"G'morning beautiful," He rumbles out, voice rough from his moaning last night, "Sleep well?"
-You nod at him, leaning down to press a kiss to his puffy lips in appreciation. That was answer enough for him and he lifted his weight off you in favor of leaning over you.
-He asks you if you're aching anywhere, and promptly massages your hips with the calloused pads of his fingers. The friction still surprisingly pleasant, and the ache in your hips eases up a little. It warms your heart, the amount of care he treats you with.
-He'll coo at you sweetly as he tries his best to ease the pain, mumbling about how much he enjoyed last night. How pretty you are. How much he loves you. How grateful he is you trusted him. All the sweet nothings.
-He takes the morning uncharacteristically slow, having been excused by Caesar apparently, or so he claims. He lazes around with you, happy just to have you in his arms for a while. You do, however, have to get up at some point which he grumbles about when you move to roll out of the sheets.
-You were right about the ache in your hips, you end up limping your way to the shower, and standing for the duration of it sucks. Lighter offers to help you out, but you insist on doing it by yourself (you wouldn't be able to keep your hands to yourself if you'd let him).
-Instead, you let him pick out some old clothes of his to wear, since yours don't exactly smell the best at this point. A too big t-shirt and a pair of sweats that no longer fit him find their way to your arms
-He waits for you patiently, like a puppy locked away from its owner during work hours. It's very cute. He's dressed now, cleaned up by himself while you were gone it seems. He practically leaps to greet you, pulling you into a sweet kiss. You hadn't expected him to be so clingy, but it was incredibly charming.
-He guides you carefully through Blazewood to get breakfast from Cheesetopia -- or, brunch more like it. You figured after your first time you would be a bit awkward, but Lighter didn't allow you any room for that. All was as usual, assuring you that nothing major had changed. Which, why would it have?
-Well... there was one thing...
-Caesar sat in a booth as you walked in, and the grin on her face said it all. She waved you over, and Lighter begrudgingly helped you over. You do your best to hide the limp, though it's absolutely futile with Caesars next words.
-"Have fun last night you two?" She teases, and humiliation washes over you -- Lighter's cheeks also turning a deep red, "No need to answer. We all heard you last night."
-Obviously, everyone around here knew of your relationship with Lighter... they didn't need to know the details. When you don't answer in your fluster, Caesar scoffs and waves her hands playfully. "Just kiddin', I stopped by to check up when you two disappeared. Congrats though!"
-She leaves you to eat after nearly giving you a heart attack, and you happily enjoy what you ordered. Feeling incredibly hungry after the night you had. Lighter doesn't seem to interested in his food, though. Just watching you with that same intensity from last night.
-You ask what's wrong, and he smiles wide at you, "Nothing, just admiring what's mine."
-You don't respond to that, because there's nothing you could say that's nearly as smooth as that.
Bonus:
You had me thinking about the nicknames a lot. I think that he definitely uses babe and baby the most. It's simple and easy to say, and people won't bat an eye if he calls you something like that. But he has other nicknames he uses you, some for specific situations, others just because he likes to switch it up sometimes.
Sugar is something he uses almost exclusively during sex. It's his way of coercing you into letting him take care of you, especially when you're acting all shy like it's an inconvenience. Or when you're afraid to make noise, "Lemme hear ya, Sugar~ Don't be shy~"
Darling is one that's more common to hear him throw out at random. However, it does have a specific use: scaring off other people. When someone is getting a little too friendly, he'll watch for a while until he can't bear it anymore and he has to intervene. He'll wrap his arms around you from behind, press a kiss to your temple, and ask "How're you feelin' Darlin'?" With a sharp glare at the offender
Doll is one that he likes to use to get you to squirm, almost always accompanied by a handsome grin. He uses it more to placate you when you're upset at him in a playful way. Like when his fangirls get a little too excited and upset you, he'll take your face in his hands and hum out, "Y'know they're not even half of what you're worth to me, doll. Stop your worrying."
Pumpkin I hadn't considered, but I think he uses it in private when it's just the two of you. It's a soft kind of thing he uses when you're really warming his heart. Curled up into his side half asleep, you'll hear him whisper it into the crown of your head, "I love you, Pumpkin."
#x reader#zzz x reader#zenless zone zero x reader#zzz#zenless zone zero#lighter zenless zone zero#bunni babbles 🍓#zenless zone zero lighter#lighter#zzz lighter#zzz lighter x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#zzz lighter lorenz#lighter lorenz#zzz lighter lorenz x reader#lighter x reader#lighter lorenz x reader#lighter zzz#lighter zzz x reader
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REMEMBER
Click here for chapter: 1 & 2
Chapter 3: Forgotten Faces, Remembered Pain
Paige's POV
I grew up here in Minnesota, living what seemed like a perfect life until I left for college in Connecticut three years ago. Good family, solid school, a career I was proud of, the best friends anyone could ask for. I had everything I could have dreamed of. Or at least, I thought I did. But then, a certain someone walked back into my life, and now I realized—time doesn’t heal anything. You just get used to carrying the weight of what hurts for a lot longer than you should.
It all started when I was twelve, discovering my love for basketball. My dad used to bring me to this basketball court just down the street to practice, sometimes for hours. We’d always end up at the local convenience store, grabbing snacks—he’d stock up on chips while I picked out ice cream. I still remember that day. I grabbed my usual chocolate ice cream, lined up to pay, and that’s when I heard it.
"No! What you gave me is a dollar short! I can count!" A girl’s voice, sharp with frustration, cutting through the air. I turned, half expecting some kind of mistake, but she was standing there, arguing with the cashier, insisting on the right change.
I couldn’t help it—my eyes met hers, and she shoved the receipt into my face, her little face demanding validation.
"You know math? Tell me I’m right, and she’s wrong."
I had to laugh. I looked at the cashier, then back at her. "Yeah, you’re right." Though I was laughing, I actually glanced at the receipt and she was, indeed, right.
She flashed that cocky grin of hers, so smug. "See? Told you I’m right."
That was just the beginning.
She started following me around, asking questions, poking into my life, telling me she had no friends, she was bored all the time. I didn’t even know why I let her in, but I did. So, I told her, "If you want to waste time, you can come watch me practice. You live around here, right?" She had mentioned earlier that she lives nearby.
"Yeah, that works," she replied, smirking. "I can waste time and practice my math by counting your scores. That is, if you can score."
That was her way of challenging me.
Five years. Five years we spent inseparable, like we couldn’t exist without each other. And then, the world broke apart.
One day, she came to practice with bloodshot eyes, her face red and blotchy from crying. Before I could even ask, she blurted out, her voice cracking:
"I’m leaving Minnesota. Mom says it’s for work, and we’ll be back sooner than I think."
She started sobbing uncontrollably. "I don’t want to leave. I can’t leave you here alone."
I was speechless. My world was spinning, and I didn’t know how to respond. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it.
"If that’s what the adults want, there’s nothing we can do about it, right?" I muttered, trying to ease the tension. "We can still talk on video calls, and you’ll be back before you know it."
But what about what I wanted?
"No!" she screamed. "If I leave, you’ll forget about me. You’ll find new friends!"
I could hear the panic in her voice, and it drove a sharp pain into my chest. "I won’t. I promise. It’s just us two, forever and ever."
And then she was gone.
For two years, we kept in touch, but as soon as I moved to Connecticut for college, things started to unravel. The calls grew less frequent, the arguments more intense. Silence followed, suffocating silence. No texts, no calls. Just emptiness.
I thought she was living her best life—at least, that’s what her social media told me. She seemed happy, thriving. But where did that leave me? Did "forever and ever" mean nothing? Was I just another part of her past, fading away?
I moved on, or so I told myself. I threw myself into my studies, my career. But still, there were nights when I found myself searching for her name, staring at her photos, wondering what had happened. Longing. Disappointment. Anger. Then confusion. Why was I still so obsessed? She left me all alone, even when I needed her the most. When I suffered an injury while playing my sport, I thought she’d be there for me, but I was wrong. I admit, I reached out to her, sending messages here and there—but maybe that was just my vulnerability talking. In the end, it didn’t matter. The lowest point of my life wasn’t even worth her time.
And then, there she was. Standing in front of me. But she was... different. Not in a good way. Something about her seemed so out of place. Her whole aura had changed. What happened to her?
It’s been a week since that first encounter, and I’m running errands for Drew. I roll my eyes—he’s got the audacity to ask me to get ice cream for him. As I’m perusing the different flavors, out of the corner of my eye, I see him.
Steve.
The shock is immediate, but the look on his face is worse. He’s more stunned than I am. But why is that? Am I not supposed to see him anymore?
"Paige? Long time no see! What are you doing here? I thought you were in Connecticut?"
My heart skips a beat. He keeps tabs on me?
"I’m on a break. Gonna head back tomorrow though, classes start soon. It’s good to see you again, Steve." I try to sound calm, but it’s hard when my mind is still reeling. "How’s Emma?"
His face contorts, and I see a flicker of pain—something I haven’t seen before, and it sends a sharp pang through me.
"Emma’s gone. Just three months ago."
The words crash into me like a wrecking ball. What? Emma’s dead?
I don’t know what to say. My mouth goes dry. "Oh my god. I’m so sorry. How are you holding up?"
"We’re fine now, I guess. But the last three months have been hell. Losing Emma... and then having my daughter almost..." He trails off, his voice cracking. "I’m just thankful my daughter got lucky."
My stomach drops. "What do you mean?"
"I came here with my daughter. You haven’t seen her yet?" he asks, and the words send a shiver through me.
Oh, I've seen her, but then she disappears again for the rest of the week.
"But maybe even if you did, she won’t remember you," he adds, his voice tinged with sadness.
I freeze. What?
"She’s suffering from a temporary memory loss from the accident, Paige."
She forgot me? She forgot about us?
The ice cream Steve is holding shakes slightly in his hands, and I suddenly realize I’m staring at it. "Is that for her? That’s her favorite."
"Yeah. I’m hoping it’ll help her remember, you know?" Steve’s voice breaks, and it feels like the weight of everything is pressing in on me.
I don’t know why I say it, but it spills out before I can stop myself.
"I want to help. Make her remember."
I must be crazy.
He looks at me, surprised but grateful. "You would? That means a lot to me, Paige."
He pauses for a moment, his eyes a little distant, before continuing. "I’ve been thinking about it for a while now—about sending her back to school. The doctors think getting back into a routine could help her. They said it might spark something, help her remember what she loved." He exhales, his voice wavering slightly. "I’ve been struggling with whether or not it's the right time, but... I think it might be the only way."
I barely hear him as my mind races. "She can attend to mine. Transfer her. She can join the swimming team. She still swims, right?"
Or maybe I'm just out of my fucking mind.
"Yes!" Steve’s face lights up. "That’s actually a great idea. I’ll start processing her papers next week."
She needs to remember. Because when she finally looks me in the eye and says sorry, it won’t be some empty apology. It’ll be real.
She’ll remember me. She has to.
Chapter 4 setting's gonna be at Uconn. More interactions and stuff!! <3
Taglist: @authentic-girl03 @unadulteratedcyclepaper @0phantom0 @sjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj
#paige bueckers#uconn#uconn huskies#uconn wbb#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers x reader#paige x reader#paige buckets#paige bueckers fanfiction#paige bueckers x oc
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“touching toes”
rafe cameron social media au
“he’s over more and more, had to give him a whole drawer. to be honest, kinda like seeing his trainers by the door.” — olivia dean, ‘touching toes’.
synopsis: after finishing her fashion studies at college in nyc, y/n moves to outerbanks to live with her grandparents. she worries about the loneliness that comes with being in a new place, knowing only her cousin topper and other relatives… that is until she is acquainted with a certain cameron.
part - 21 | 22 | 23
masterlist
the next day, the three of you set off home. the journey back to outerbanks a quiet blur, as you basked in the tranquility that your company brought.
when you arrived, the sun was setting over the marsh, casting golden hues over the water, as you huddled in the back of the car — rafe’s hand planted on your thigh. your life suddenly a complete juxtaposition to your days in la — media frenzies, the fashion show, and the unexpected ease that came with spending a night in rafe’s arms. outerbanks was still the same calming home it had grown to be; your time away a distant whirlwind. it felt good to be back.
pulling you from your thoughts, rafe squeezed your knee, “you’re quiet,” he said, concern etched on his face.
“just thinking,” you smiled, resting your head on his shoulder as you stared out of the window mindlessly, “this all feels quite real now…”
worry invaded your body, as you couldn’t ignore the weight of what was to come: navigating the reactions of the island, to yours and rafe’s relationship.
“it is real,” rafe said firmly, “but you’re not alone, y/n.”
you gave him a small, grateful smile, but your stomach twisted slightly as the familiar sight of your grandparents’ home came into view. it wasn’t their react that was truly worrying you, though.
yourusername
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yourusername don’t worry internet, the cameron siblings are home safely @/sarahcameron @/rafecam
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kiaracarrera missed you and sarah so bad
itscleo lit having withdrawals
johnbr i’ll be stealing sarah now, thank you
rafecam great trip 😉
user i should’ve been there
ilovesarah yk what she’s funny, i like her
user2 fr if not me with rafe, i’m happy it’s her
sarahfan101 pls can you just tell us!
your grandmother was in the kitchen, humming softly as she stirred something on the stove, the familiar scent of her cooking filling the house. your grandfather resides in his usual armchair in the living room, reclined with a newspaper on his lap as he attempted to complete the crosswords.
“sweetheart, you’re home!” your grandmother exclaimed, turning with a warm smile as you walked in. her eyes shifted to rafe, as he stood behind you, her smile widening, “and rafe! it’s lovely to see you back here, again.”
she looked between the two of you, almost expectantly. you could feel the faint drumming of your heart in your chest as you exchanged a look with rafe, “nan, there’s something i — we gotta tell you.”
she clasped her hands together in delight before pulling you both into a hug, “i knew it, i knew it, i knew it, i knew it!” her eyes lit up as she smiled wider than you’d ever seen her before, “oh, bill! our baby has gotten herself a boyfriend!”
her excitement was uncontainable, you didn’t even get the chance to tell your grandfather… she’d done that for you.
your grandfather lowered his newspaper and raised an eyebrow as he looked at rafe, “boyfriend, huh?” he said gruffly, almost not warming to the idea of his beloved granddaughter flying from the nest, “you’ve got some explaining to do, kid.”
“pops!” you groaned, but rafe chuckled behind you.
“it’s okay,” rafe said to you, stepping forward to shake your grandfather’s hand.
pop’s kept a tight grip on rafe’s hand as he studied him, “alright cameron, let’s hear it. what makes you good enough for my granddaughter, eh?”
your cheeks flushed, but rafe didn’t miss a beat. “honestly, she’s too good for me,” he said with sincerity, “but i care an awful lot about her, and i’ll do whatever it takes to make her happy.”
your grandmother beamed, her excitement almost becoming too much, and your grandfather cracked a smile while rafe looked back to shoot you a wink. “alrighty then,” he spoke, gesturing to the couch, “shot the kettle on, mabel, we’ve got a lot of catching up to do.”
johnbr
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johnbr sarah’s home! ❤️
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jjmaybank where’s my invite?!
itscleo you just gonna third wheel them?
jjmaybank i’m a key part of this relationship
heywardpope pogue meet up when?
kiaracarrera rn?
heywardpope @/jjmaybank @/itscleo @/sarahcameron @/johnbr @/yourusername you game?
your phone
you couldn’t tell the pogues… not yet. not over the phone. right now, your priority was telling your cousin, before he found out himself.
that’s why, later that evening, you found yourself in the passenger seat of rafe’s truck as you drive to the thornton residence. your nerves returned to you in full force, softened by the way rafe’s large palm clutched your thigh as his other effortlessly steered the vehicle.
a/n: i fear you can tell i’m british by the way i write the grandparents pls
anyways i was gonna include topper’s reaction here but i wouldn’t get it out in time.
taglist: @my-name-is-baby @yesshewrites1 @urbrunettebombshell @leather-n-velvet @fruitcakerafe @littlefreak-liz @wdwbts101 @akobx @lossfairy @marleymarleymarleymarley @jjmaybankmylovee @mbella607 @scream4mami @mrsdrewstarkeyy @honeyluvsatj @rafegetinmybed @hypnotizedstarkey
#dividers by pommecita#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smau#outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe obx#rafe x reader#smau#social media#outerbanks rafe#rafe x you#rafe outer banks#rafe fanfiction#rafe fic
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I Have Nothing (If I Don't Have You) Part 10 (Steddie X You)
Warning: Soft Dom Security Steddie & Sub Singer Fem Y/N, SMUT, dirty talk, semi-public (in an office at a party), light choking, FLUFF, they love each other, Steve makes a declaration to his father involving Y/N, Y/N gives them a present <3
ANGST *throws a baton in the air and catches it in angst!*
There is a shooting that's referenced throughout that Steddie protect her from, blood is mentioned, slight cliffhanger ending, Steves Dad is a dick (of course), calls Y/N demeaning names (trash, mentions her past), mentions of loss of a loved one.
Like most chapters of this series, this deals with some heavy themes but it's not too bad. Enjoy my friends <3!
Word Count: 4033
Series Here/Donate to Me :)
Sarah pants as she all but sprints into Hawkin’s General, growling as she finally makes it through all the paparazzi flashing pictures outside while the police department keeps them at bay.
“Where is Y/N?! I’m her agent!”, she practically screams to one of the officers as her eyes search for a face she could recognize.
“Hey, hey. Let her through.”, an older gentlemen instructed as he ushered her forward into a waiting room.
“What happened?! Where is Y/N?!”
“I don’t know. All they’ll tell me is there was a shooting. I’ve tried to get a goddamn doctor to tell me something but… I’m Wayne by the way. I’m Eddie Munson’s uncle.”
“Where are they? Eddie and Steve? Are they ok?!”
“I-I don’t know. I just don’t know.”
***
Steve heavily sighs as the elevator doors slowly open to the party on the third floor of. His parent’s building.
Even though your arm was clinging to both of theirs, his hand over yours seem to be grasping for dear life.
“We don’t have to do this, Steve.”, you whisper causing Eddie’s gaze to shift that way.
“No, no. I’m ok. I can do this. What about you? D-Do you need anything or—”
Both men had shown fear before when they were trying to find you when you ODed but they still had that aggressive, protective demeanor behind it like the big protector men they were. As Steve stuttered over his words, he seemed like a frightened child about to tell his parents he failed a test and your heart broke.
Not caring about any eyes in the room or what people would think, your palm cupped his cheek as you brought your lips to his.
“No, baby. I’m ok. We’re right here.”
The metalhead softly smiled as he comfortingly patted his friend’s shoulder.
“I can kiss you to if you want. I mean—”
“No. No, thank you.”, Steve laughs as you giggle at Eddie’s antics.
As the three of you walk further into the room, you take in the high class setting around you. Whatever Steve’s dad sold or did, he was definitely doing it well because everything seemed exceptionally expensive with nothing out of place. The stuffy air was slightly suffocating but you were used to that when it came to events like this but normally you had something in your system to calm your nerves.
“Champagne?”, a waiter asked as he held out the tray, startling you slightly.
“No, thank you, and don’t ask again.”
The boy just nodded before swishing away to the next person surprising you as you watched him nonchalantly smile and ask someone else.
“You two can drink if you want.”
“No, honey, we’re ok. Plus, even if this is a party, we still need to be on alert for you.”
“He means his dad and his bullshit.”, Eddie whispers, winking your way when you smile.
The sound of a woman’s laugh and high pitch squeal caught your attention as she made a beeline towards Steve. Since neither man jumped in front of you, you assumed this was someone they knew.
“Baby! Oh my God, I’m so glad you’re home. Hello, Edward! And oh my gosh who is this you brought with you?”
“This is our client. Y/N Y/L/N, meet my mom. Mom; Y/N.”
“Oh, hi. It’s very nice to meet you.”, you grin as you extend your hand out to hers before she grabs it and pulls you into a hug while Eddie snickers behind you.
“Mom…mom…come on, now.”
“I’m just so happy to meet you. Plus, I want you to have a good image of me in your mind before my asshole husband ruins it.”
With that she turns around and motions for your three to follow her.
“Is she high?”, you whisper with wide amused eyes.
“Um, no, but I think she’s definitely had a champagne bottle…or two.”, Steve sighs as he places his hand on his lower back and guides you forward.
***
“Steven! Good to see you, son.”
“Hey, dad.”, the man replies with a tight smile as he awkwardly embraces his father. “You remember Eddie.” The man slightly grimaces at the metalhead even as he nods in his direction before his disgust settles on you. “And this is Y/N. She’s the client we look after.”
“Hm. You brought a client to our event? I’m sure she has better things to do unless you just wanted to show off your wealth.”, his dad sassed causing your head to tilt.
“I have no wealth to show off. Plus, she’s my friend—”
“Oh, your friends with someone you do business with? Because that won’t end badly.”
“Bill.”, Steve’s mother hisses as your grip around his hand tightens.
“May I have a moment alone with my son?”
As Steve starts to pull away, your palm tugs him back eliciting a soft smile from him as he turns to face you.
“Don’t go in there. I don’t like the way he talks to you.”
“It’s ok, baby. I’m used to it.”
“Steve…”
Cupping your face in his palms, he kisses your forehead and a heavy sigh leaves you when you finally let him go.
“He’ll be alright, sweetheart.”, Eddie tries to calm you as he rubs your back.
################
“Look, I don’t know how many times I can tell you people I didn’t see anything!”, a man growls, grabbing Sarah’s attention as she heads that way with Wayne in tow pausing when she finds him yelling at an officer.
He seemed incredibly irate with his suit half undone and his face redder than a tomato as sweat dripped down his features.
“Bill…can you please…stop…yelling.”, a woman sighs from her seat near him with a can of Ginger Ale against her forehead.
“Mr. Harrington, this was your event and my understanding is it’s pretty guarded so how did the perpetrator get in?”
“Mr. Harrington? You’re Steven’s dad? Is he ok?!”
“Goddamn it! Am I speaking Spanish or something? I. DON’T. KNOW! All I know is my son shows up after so much time and brings this trash singer he claims to be in love with—”
“What?”, Sarah asks, cutting him off. As she shifts her gaze towards Eddie’s uncle, his own gravitates towards the floor and she knows it’s true. “Well, that explains some things.”
***
Eddie chuckles lightly as he scans your worried features, grabbing your hand and placing his own on your lower back as you both gently sway to the violin music from the floor below.
“He’ll be fine, sweetheart. Trust me.”
“I just…I remember what it was like hearing my parents talk to me like that. It stays with you…”
“Yeah…definitely longer than any bruises.”
Your gaze shifts to his as his jaw unhinges and he gently smiles your way.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“No, no, your highness. You didn’t do anything wrong.”, he comforts as he twirls you and playfully dips you, making you laugh before pulling you back up into his embrace. “My dad definitely had a bite to his words. I think what’s weird is… I could always anticipate when a fist was coming but his words…they seemed to come out of nowhere sometimes…”
Wrapping your arms around him, you rested your head on his chest as you squeezed him tightly to you.
“I love you, Eddie Munson.”
“I’ll never get tired of hearing you say that.”, he whispers.
The door to Mr. Harrington’s office door bangs open as an angry Steve stomps out before his dad grabs his arm.
“Don’t do this, son. You’re throwing your entire future away.”
“No, I’m not. I’m good at what I do, dad, and I’m not giving up my business for yours.”
“Oh, yeah? And what part of fucking your client is good for business?!”
The man stood up straighter and on impulse Eddie pushed you behind him, keeping a hand on your arm to make sure you were safe.
“Lower your fucking voice. She’s been through enough.”
“I know, Steven. I can fucking read. Arrests, alcohol, drugs, parties. Hell, didn’t she just overdose a few months ago!?”
“She’s been sober and doing better—What the fuck am I doing? I don’t need to explain anything to you. I love her, dad, and I love my job. Come on, guys.”, he ushers, grabbing your arm as he pulls you both down the hall to head for the stairs.
“Wait, wait.”, you insist as you pull him into an empty office. “What happened there? Talk to me, baby.”
“I’m sorry, honey. I know we wanted to keep this a secret. I just…he was talking about you and it was pissing me off and I just blurted it out. I love you so much and I’m not going to let ANY asshole talk to you or about you like your trash—”
Grasping his collar, you yanked him to you and smashed your lips to his. It took him a moment but after a few seconds, Steve finally exhaled as his shoulders deflated and he lifted you into his arms to carry you to the desk behind you.
“If you’re going to get riled up about every asshole who calls me trash, we’ll need to hire some more security guys.” The man laughed as he kissed you again, cupping your face in his palms. “We can tell people…if you want…maybe talk to Sarah first but…”
“You don’t have to do that for us, sweetheart.”
“I don’t want to hide you guys. I love you…both of you… I just don’t want to ruin your business. You said it could look bad if—”
Eddie’s fingers gripping your cheeks interrupted you as he turned you to face him so he could kiss your lips.
“Let’s not worry about that right now, pretty girl.”
Steve’s lips sucked on your neck as he rolled his hips between your legs eliciting a heavy pant from you both.
“U-Use me, baby. It’s ok. I want you to. I’m yours.”
Leaning back, his eyes search yours as his palm caresses your face and his thumb grazes your lips.
“What if we get caught?”, he teases, making you giggle as you circle one of your legs around his waist and pull him closer to you.
“We’ll just have to be quick and quiet, Mr. Harrington.”
A loud groan of approval leaves him as your own hand slides under his button up shirt near his neck and he hastily fumbles with his belt, pulling down his pants enough to free his cock. Steve lifts you slightly to help you take off your panties that you promptly toss as Eddie who rolls his eyes as he winks your way.
After tugging you closer to the edge of the desk, he tilts down to lick a long stripe through your folds before tapping your clit with his length and guiding himself inside you as you fell back against the wood underneath you.
“Oh my God—”
“Shhhh…”, the metalhead scolded as he quickly came around covered your mouth.
“Fuck…so deep…”, you whine as Eddie removes his hand to pet your head.
“Yeah? Feels good, your highness? Jesus, I can’t wait for the world to find out you’re ours. This beautiful girl deserves the world.”
Grabbing your throat, Steve pulled you up right and rested his forehead against yours as he thrust his hips at a rapid pace knowing your time may be short.
“That’s it, baby. Right there. Mmph…”
“Right there, honey? Fuck you feel so good. We’re going to take such good care of you. Mmm—you’ll never have to worry about anyone hurting you ever again.” His last sentence came out as a bit of growl and you wrapped your arms around his neck as he did the same holding you to his chest. “You’re safe with me, Y/N. I promise.”
“I know, Steve. I know. Make me cum, baby, please.”
Honoring your request, you clung to each other as he slammed his cock into you, muffling your moans in his shoulder as the ball dropped in your belly with him following close behind.
“I love you, Y/N.”, Steve panted.
“I love you to.”
As he ran his fingers through his hair, he backed away from you and you smiled as Eddie came around, lifting you into his arms to carry you to a nearby armchair where he took a seat with your straddling his waist.
The metalhead watched you with admiration as you unbuckled his belt and removed his cock from his slacks. After spitting into your hand, he mewled as you stroked it along his shaft and slowly descended onto him.
“Fuck me.”, Eddie groans as he cups your face in his palm and brings your lips to his. “Good girl, your highness. Bounce on my cock just like that.”
His fingers tangle in your hair as your head falls into his shoulder to muffle your moans as your hips grind and roll against him.
“I-I love you, Eddie. Oh my God.” Lightly tugging you back, you groan against his lips as you whisper against them. “You’re safe with me to, baby. I promise. I-I’ll be good. I p-promise I won’t embarrass you.”
“You never have, sweetheart.” Planting his feet, he thrust upwards, slamming the tip of his length against that spongy spot deep inside you roughly as your eyes roll closed. “I k-know people pretended to care about you, baby, but we genuinely do—Jesus—we just want y-you to be happy and—and healthy so…”
“So what, Eddie? Tell me, please.”
Pulling you back down against his shoulder, he hugs you to him just as Steve had as he fully takes over pumping his length while murmuring into your ear.
“So we can spend our lives with you—fuck—have a family with you…grow old together…we’d marry you, princess, if we could…put a ring on your finger…show the world you’re ours and—fuck I’m gonna cum—you’re safe.”
Your lips crash to his as your body trembles and pussy quivers around him as you cum. Eddie grunts at the feeling, his fingers digging into your flesh as his rhythm faulters and you feel him warm your insides.
#################
A door slowly opens and Sarah gasps as Steve steps through with blood still clinging to his what was once pristine shirt.
“Steve! Oh my God. Are—Are you alright? What happened?!”
“I…we…I promised myself I would do everything…to make sure she never saw hospital again…”, he mumbled before falling to his knees as Wayne caught him halfway down and held him to his chest as the boy sobbed. “This is my fault. I never should have…brought her there…my dad…I can’t focus…”
“Steven…I know you’re hurting but…I need you to tell me if Eddie is alright.”
As he continued to cry, your agent and the metalhead’s uncle kept hearing the same thing over and over.
“This is my fault…”
***
You grin in the mirror at the reflection of both boys straightening up their attire as you finish quickly restyling your hair.
“Hey Steve, can you hand me my clutch, please?”
“Oh manners. I love it.”, he smiles as he reaches for what you asked and bows as he presents it to you. “Your highness.”
“Thank you.”, you giggle. “It’s funny…you mentioned rings because…I got you guys a present before we flew out here and I was waiting for the right time to give them to you…”
After digging in your bag, you produce a box that Eddie giddily takes causing the other boy to playfully roll his eyes. Inside were two silver bands with an engraving etched along the inside.
“’ Je suis à toi et tu es à moi.’”, the pretty boy reads aloud in choppy French that has you beaming wide. “Something about you and me. I know that much.”
“I am yours and you are mine?” Your jaw drops as the metalhead chuckles your way before he shrugs. “I’ve, um, I may have been trying to learn some French since it’s your safe place. That way whenever we go back I can actually understand what people are saying. Was I right?”
You nod as you wrap your arms around him and kiss his lips before doing the same with Steve.
“We’ll get you something too, honey. I promise—”
“You don’t have to. I just…I saw them and I thought of you…how much I love you.”
“Hey, I have an idea. Why don’t we get out of here, go to the diner, and fill up on some greasy burgers?”
“Oh my God. I’m starving.”, you jokingly whine as you follow them out the door and down the stairs. “I have to run to the restroom first if that’s ok?”
“Oh yeah, now she’s asking. Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you to hold your dress up?”
Smiling, you smack Eddie’s chest as you scurry to the restroom to do what you needed.
Everything seemed completely normal and you were the happiest you had been in what felt like your entire life. You shouldn’t have been surprised when you opened the bathroom door and were met with a face you hadn’t seen in person in a very long time.
“Natalie?”, you ask as your eyes promptly search for the boys.. “What, um, what are you doing here in Hawkins?”
“I saw the interview… saw some sightings online of you on a plane to Indiana…did some research on your entourage now…put two and two together.”
Something was off in her tone as she spoke and you noticed immediately that her hands were shaking.
“Natalie why are you here?”, you ask her as calmly as possible.
“You didn’t go to Simon’s funeral.”
“I didn’t think it was appropriate.”
“For my brother’s girlfriend to be at his funeral?!”
You jumped at her outburst and held out your hand hoping to calm her.
“Natalie…Simon and I broke up months ago…”
“Then why was he with you that night?”, she asked as tears began to leave her eyes. “I have…so many questions and every answer I do find…leads back to you, Y/N.”
“Honey, I—”
“Don’t do that! Don’t you dare talk down to me!” Reaching into her coat pocket, she pulled out a handgun making you gasp as she pointed it your way.
“Y/N, honey is everything—” As Steve walked down the hallway, she turned on him and his eyes widen as he holds up his palms to show he’s unarmed.
“NO! No, Natalie! Keep talking to me! You said you had questions about your brother. Ask me! Ask me anything!”
Her wild eyes kept flicking between you both as she back away and kept the weapon pointed at you.
“Answer…me. If you two…broke up…why were you with him?”
“I…I had a relapse…and I knew he’d…he’d give me a fix.”
“So you used him?”, she growled.
“Yes.”, you whisper as your own tears begin to fall. “I’m not perfect, Nat, but—”
“But you’re still here and my brother is gone! Do you know what my mom and I have been through?!”
“I would give anything to bring him back. I really would—”
“Fucking liar!”
Right as she cocks the gun, Steve rushes forward to lift her arm in the air as Eddie comes out of nowhere and tackles you from the side out of harms way.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”, he panics as he takes off his suit jacket. “You’re bleeding, b-baby. Where…where did you get hit?”
Your hands fly down your body, feeling the dampness of blood but not finding a wound.
“I don’t know. I don’t feel—Eddie?”
The metalhead’s eyes flutter as he collapses in your arms and you realize the blood that was on your dress was sticking to his torso. Tearing open his shirt, you found a wound on his abs and quickly grab his jacket to press against it.
“STEVE!”
While Eddie had been attending to you, the other man was able to subdue Simon’s sister and get the gun away from her as security appeared to cuff her. Sliding to your side, he moved the jacket back to assess his injury. Silently, he pulls out his phone as you continue to hold the long-haired boy in your grasp.
“Yeah, we need ambulance and police at the Harrington Company building. Shooter is subdued by security and my-uh-my partner was hit in the abdomen…No…I don’t think anyone else was-was injured.” As his voice cracks, you move some Steve’s hair back with your fingers and his teary eyes immediately turn to you. “Are you ok? Were you hit?”
“No…No, I’m ok. I think…”
“Yes ma’am. I’m Steven Harrington and my partner is Edward Munson. We are security for Y/N Y/L/N…Yes ma’am…No, she says she’s fine but…” You wince as Steve delicately touches your arm and you see the slight bruising beginning to appear on your wrist. “…She may have a sprained arm from him pushing her out of the way…Yes…please…please hurry.”
“Eddie, you need to open your eyes, baby, please.”, you beg.
His lips began to move and you leaned down to hear what he was mumbling.
“I love you.”
##################
“Wayne Munson and Sarah Dash?”, the nurse called, guiding them and Steve to the hospital room.
“Y/N!”, your agent sighed in relief as she quickly scurried to your side of the room and pulled you into her arms. “Everything is going to be alright, sweetie.”
“Y/N has a small fracture at the wrist so she’ll need to wear that cast for about a month. As for Mr. Munson, he was extremely lucky. The bullet went straight through and missed anything vital. We gave him some meds to help him sleep and he’ll definitely need to rest. He’s going to be in a lot of pain these next few weeks.”
“He’ll be ok?”, Wayne asked as he placed his palm on his nephew’s chest. “We shouldn’t be worried?”
“Not from what I see… Of course, we’ll keep him for the next few days to make sure everything is alright before we let him go.”
“H-Have you heard anything about Natalie? Where is she?”, you murmur as Sarah tenderly pets your head.
“Um, that’s the young lady who…? My understanding is she’s in a cell but—”
“I can find all that out for you, honey.”, your agent relays and you nod.
After the doctor leaves, Steve’s eyes harden as he enters his professional mode you had seen many times before.
“I’m going to talk to the officers and security here at the hospital to make sure their privacy is respected and no one can sneak in.”
“Steven.”, Eddie’s uncle says with a deep authoritative tone as he grabs the boy’s arm, surprising you when he yanks it away. “Son…you’re going to want to be one of the first people he sees when he wakes up.”
As he stomps out of the room, he doesn’t even hear your socked feet slide across the linoleum. When your palm touches his shoulder, in one swift motion he grabs your forearm and shoves you hard against the wall, breathing heavily as he holds you still, raising his fist in the air defensively.
“It’s me, Steve! It’s me. It’s ok—”
“It’s NOT ok! You both got hurt! I failed!”
“You didn’t fail. You both saved me and the doctor says Eddie will be ok—”
“He shouldn’t be in there to begin with!! I should have clocked her at the party. We should have seen her. I should have noticed how agitated she was before I said anything…I-I-I…It should be me in there.”
“No, baby, no. Neither of you should be in there b-but you told me…it was part of the job…that’s why I couldn’t take that bullet for you…a bullet that was meant for ME.”
His eyes soften at your words as if finally realizing it was you he was holding and promptly let you go as he placed his hands on his hips.
“That’s my best friend, Y/N.”
As he begins to cry, you immediately tackle your arms around him and he promptly does the same, nuzzling his face into your neck as you hold him tightly to you.
####################
@rckstrbee @melodymishahiddlestan @myherometalhead
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@needylilgal022 @dashingdeb16 @hardladyheart
#steddie x reader#steddie fluff#steddie smut#steddie fanfiction#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson smut#eddie fanfic#eddie stranger things#steve fanfic#steve smut#steve stranger things#joe keery#joseph quinn#stranger things#fan fiction#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington angst#eddie munson angst#steddie angst#steddie fic#steddie x y/n#steddie x you#steddie x fem!reader
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No, cause, what do you mean he was innocent?? Wdym for most of his life he was a happy and kind person? Full of hope and optimism for the future. Surrounded by people he loved and trusted and did the same to him back.
What do you mean those most important to him were ripped away all at once???
Hi my name is Maria and I’m gonna scream about Barok real quick
SPOILERS FOR DGS 2-4/5
I wish some people didn’t boil him down to “racist”
Like, i totally understand why people don’t like him and if the damage is done, it’s done. But it just doesn’t sit right when people refuse to acknowledge his character growth!! Especially if they make people feel bad for liking him.
I don’t think a majority of people do this, but I have seen it happen and it’s :((
AND ALSO!! I wish I depicted it, but the lyrics aren’t just Current vs Past Barok either.
I’ve been wanting to scream this for a while but-
HE KNOWS??? HE UNDERSTANDS HES BEING IRRATIONAL HE KNOWS HIS FEELINGS ARE WRONG
AND IT HURTS HIM
He’s keeping up this facade because it was helping the crime rate. Even though it was such a monumental burden on himself.
But it was too much for him.
And that kills me.
The way he had a limit. The way he tried to be strong and selfless. The way he probably felt that burden again upon his return. The way he convinces himself that he’s willing, able, even HONORED, to uphold this awful reputation. Even though he plays no part in it truthfully
The way he never wanted to be cold, rude, and ruthless. He really is a kind-hearted soul forced to change and sink himself further and further in rage and resentment.
You can really see younger Barok still in him.
He’s such a goddamn tragedy, he makes me sob, and I’m so glad by the end of the game, he’s finally getting a brighter future 🥹
#ace attorney#the great ace attorney#barok van zieks#tgaa#dgs#my art#tgaa spoilers#dgs spoilers#I have many song lyrics I want to draw Barok too….uragh….#he actually makes me unwell#insane even#what a turn of events???#I USED TO DISLIKE THIS GUY CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???#he was such a nothing character to me…bland and a whatever burger#NOWW HES MY BABY BOY 😫😫😫 12 years older then me but shhhhh#I could revisit his cases 12 times and it wouldn’t be enough#his story and character arc and growth is BEAUTIFUL#MAKES ME SCREEEEAM#Spotify
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tall claims court!
convex week day 4 - gift/prank - prev/next
@convexweek if I name drop the prompt in the end it counts right
“So you see, your honor, this sun is unworthy of his position in such a high value system, and I believe that the rest of this hearing should leave you and the jury thoroughly convinced!” Scar made a little flourish with his hand at the end of his opening statement, which Cub thought was stupid, but all of Scar’s opening statement was stupid, so this wasn’t a huge surprise.. but the judge, Bdubs, seemed to enjoy it regardless. This was going to be a long day.
At least Mumbo’s response was strong, even if Cub was only half listening. Mumbo was nearly as confident a speaker, and the things he was saying actually made sense, so that helped! Cub felt the need to emphasize that he literally hadn’t done anything, but whatever.
The other half of Cub’s splintered focus was on Scar, just sitting at his place in the stand, regarding Mumbo with more attention and respect that Cub was giving his own lawyer.
“Despite his rocky exterior and curt dealing with the moons in his system, my client has done nothing deserving of this drastically out of proportion proposed sentencing.”
When Mumbo sat down, Cub was still looking at Scar. Mumbo elbowed him and Cub jumped, a few sparks flying from his shoulders.
“What?”
“Stop ogling the prosecutor.” Mumbo hissed under his breath, to which Cub responded at a normal volume, no need to whisper.
“I’m not.”
Judge Bdubs glanced their way, but said nothing as the court was passed back to Scar, the moon introducing his first witness. Cub had no idea who this ‘witness’ was, not by name or face, and he assumed this would likely be a trend. Whoever they were, though, they did not look happy with Cub. Scar prompted them to begin.
“I was a Mars moon, one of the two orbiting that planet, and I was having some interpersonal issues with the other moon, with few places to go. We just didn’t get along, and I was feeling lost, anxious, and while I would have loved to visit Earth, I just felt too anxious to be in such proximity to other life. I was in a bad way. So I went to Cub.” The moon turned their frosty glare to Cub, which took him a second to notice with how intently he’d been staring at Scar, but then he remembered he didn’t care, and continued his Scar-gazing.
“Cub doesn’t have to leave the sun to watch the Earth, I never knew what kind of magic made that possible, but I thought this could be a solution for me, a break from the other moon, and a less anxiety inducing way to witness the life I’d worked so hard to be able to see. Cub was civil, I guess, when I first visited the sun. I’d never met him before, I didn’t know what to expect. I told him exactly how I was struggling and what I wanted, but he was always more concerned with the moons, that everything was okay on Mars, and the other moon was doing their job and not how the two of us were getting along. Mars was fine, the moons were fine, everything was fine, but when I told him that, he just stared at me and asked what the problem was. I told him! I had run him through it several times! I was sent back to Mars before I could even ask about his alternate Earth viewing station.”
“From there, everything was worse. When the other moon found out I’d gone to Cub, they were furious, my anxiety was debilitating, and I was desperate, I just needed an escape. When I tried to go back to the sun, explain what was happening, Cub was nothing short of foul. He extended no pity, no empathy, was frustrated with me for bothering him, for asking for something so stupid when I could just go to Earth with no issue, and I felt my position was threatened when his concern lied only in how well I could perform my guardianship of my moon. After spending decades working towards that position, I didn’t even last another month. I never got to enjoy the Earth, and only got berated for issues outside of my control.”
Scar nodded to his witness when they finished, turning his gaze to Cub. “Now, I would just like to know if the defendant has anything to say about this. It was a long time ago after all, maybe he’s changed his point of view.”
Cub rolled his eyes and made Mumbo tensed, kicking him under the table, which, everyone probably saw. Deny deny deny.
“I am the guardian of the Earth system. My first priority is ensuring every moon, planet, and star are being properly and competently cared for. I have no other obligations, especially for asinine requests. No life on Earth knows we exist, you don’t have to bother me every time you want to see it, you can just go, that’s so stupid-“
“My client has nothing else to say!” Mumbo cut in, but Scar looked pleased nonetheless. Luckily, Mumbo had a lot of reasonable smart things to say to the jury, so Cub didn’t have to, and even after a seemingly endless amount of mostly benign accounts from moons Cub barely remembered, Cub felt very little like he was on the back foot here. Maybe Scar’s goal was truly just to waste his time. He certainly kept throwing smug looks back after each of his exaggerated flourishes.
But in the end, Cub was just bored. There was nothing better than doing fuck all on his own sun, but it was cold and Cub couldn’t just space out because people kept talking at him and getting mad and telling him to stop staring at Scar, but Scar was the most interesting thing to look at in the room, and if Cub was going to be subjected to this much bullshit, he might as well rest his eyes.
And then all the fire in the courtroom flared with a loud fwoosh, then burnt away into nothing, embers floating to the ceiling and promptly dying, leaving the entire room in complete darkness.
Something clicked, and Cub was suddenly blinded, squinting at the bright light assaulting his vision. There was another spotlight across the room, centered on Scar. Cub threw Mumbo an alarmed look, but his lawyer looked just as surprised.
A dim light faded in over the judge’s stand, Bdubs’s imposing form illuminated in his raised position overlooking the court room.
“I’ve noticed..” the judge drawled his words, making sure he had the attention of every single star and moon in the courtroom. “Some tension abound.” Bdubs looked from Cub to Scar and back to Cub again, which was weird and annoying.
“You’re being weird and annoying.”
At the same time Mumbo elbowed him, Bdubs grinned, not without menace. “It’s not your turn to shine yet, Cub, so why don’t you simmer down before another strike is added to the board.”
Cub looked up, the ‘strikes’ above his head illuminating once more. He had four, three from talking out of turn and one from a brief scuffle between Mumbo and Scar, but both of them had gotten a strike for that, then got dropped into The Pit for a brief twenty minute recess. In Cub’s defense, Scar also had two additional strikes, it wasn’t like it was exactly hard to get them. If Cub’s side got five.. well, Cub didn’t know exactly what would happen, but he was a little bit afraid of Bdubs and didn’t particularly want to find out.
“Comment revoked.”
“Thank you.” Bdubs sat up a little straighter, pleased. “Now! Let’s play a game called Will They Won’t They!” Scar groaned, head hitting the desk, and Cub was almost certain he’d get a strike for that, but Bdubs was too intent on explaining his game.
“Now, unless I’m mistaken, and I’m never mistaken, it seems to me that kindled passion burns bright in one of our contestants tonight, and the other; heart burned and scorned so many times before, still shows interest despite it all..”
Scar sat up suddenly, flakes of frost flying from his hair, “Objection! Bdubs, will you stop trying to set me up with the criminals on the other side of the stand? I don’t know how to explain to you that this is possibly the worst place for me to find a partner, especially if that star is the asshole I dragged here in the first place!”
“Ah, yes, yes, young love.. You say you can’t stand them, yet you’re always bringing the same kinds of stars back to my courtroom, I see you, Scar, I see you.”
“I’m a criminal prosecutor!”
“Objection dismissed. It seems to me, Cub’s got the eye for you too. What say you, Cub?”
“I’m confused.” Cub looked to Mumbo, but Mumbo seemed nearly as resigned as Scar as did distressed. “I’m confused,” he said again, to Bdubs this time. The judge was no less radiant.
“He’s confused..” Bdubs spoke slyly, like this was some grand reveal, “Now, is he playing coy, or does he really not know..”
“Is this part of the trial?” Cub tried, strained. He didn’t like all this attention, he didn’t like standing out so much, it had been a long time since he’d been in a courtroom, but he didn’t remember this.
“Ogling was the word Mumbo used, and I think it suits your behavior over the course of this trial quite impeccably, don’t you think, Scar?”
“You know, I thought he was into me too for a very short couple of minutes, but I really think he’s just stupid.”
“What?” Cub bristled, caring very little for the way Mumbo tensed up. “I’m not- I’m not into you, where would anyone have gotten that impression?”
Bdubs knit his fingers, squinting at Cub with a great scrutiny. “If I thought this star had any capacity at all to play coy, I would be greatly suspicious right now. Maybe he is stupid. He just doesn’t know he’s in love with you.”
“That is not what I meant!” Scar hissed, while Cub just sat there, dumbfounded.
“Do no one else’s eyes hurt, like, all the time? My eyes were so tired I didn’t even know it until they got a break, I don’t even know why his insides are so black, but I refuse to believe that no one else here’s eyes aren’t constantly drawn to the dark.” There was some murmuring among the crowd, faint discussion that seemed to come to the conclusion of yes, Cub was the only person in the room who had this problem. Great.
“Irrelevant!” Bdubs declared, drawing the attention back to himself. “Now everyone in the stands, the jury, witnesses, everyone, please look under your seats where you will find three cards; they will! they won’t! they could! I am going to introduce the contestants, and on the count of three, the audience will decide their fate! Are you ready?”
The silence was deafening. One star in the back gave a small pity whoop.
“Great!” Bdubs clapped his hands together, having no qualms with the lack of enthusiasm from the crowd. “On the right we have the civil hero, actor for justice with a mysterious past rivaling the dark side of the moon, Scar!”
A few small, if not hesitant claps followed this up.
“On the left with have Cub, the infamous Earth sun, a light in the dark, but certainly not for most moons in his system, though, our hero seems to have caught his attention, and on a journey of love and acceptance, the two of them might just make each other more fulfilled celestials..”
Silence.
“What do ya say? Will they, or won’t they!?”
The dark walls of the courtroom suddenly ignited, flame greedily swallowing up the cold that had drafted in, its light revealing the opinion of the entire courtroom. ‘They won’t!’ Unanimously, except for Bdubs, who was holding a ’They could!’
“Great.” Scar seethed through gritted teeth, firmly setting his ‘They won’t!’ card face down on the desk, “Can we get on with it now.”
“Ah, yes, the sentencing!” Bdubs declared, and it was probably lucky for Cub that Bdubs couldn’t hear Mumbo’s WHAT over the sound of his own voice, or they might’ve gotten their fifth strike.
“I- Objection? Objection, your honor!” Mumbo gathered himself, though Bdubs looked less than interested, “The jury haven’t even decided whether or not Cub is innocent or guilty, how can we just move to the sentencing?”
“This is my court mister Mumbo, and in my court, anything goes! Anything I want that is. And I want the Earth system to be open!”
Cub’s heart dropped. What!?
“Cub, sun of the Earth system, for your crimes of negligence and unnecessary cruelty to the moons in your system, past and present, you will be sentenced to one Earth month of complete accommodation for any moon, star, or planet that wants see life on Earth.”
“I- I can’t do that, I literally can not do that.” Cub whipped around for any kind of support, but it seemed every single celestial in attendance was greatly excited by the idea of visiting a life system that had been so exclusive for so long. “Your honor, I have these strict entrance guidelines in place for a reason. Just because most life forms can’t see us, doesn’t mean we don’t exert energy- a lot of energy, heat especially- Cramming a trillion celestials in the Earth system would destroy it, and if you think that number is an exaggeration, you would be wrong. But even with smaller numbers- life is sensitive, I could not possibly sustain the kind of parade you are suggesting without massive consequences.”
Bdubs considered Cub thoughtfully, but hoping was a mistake, Bdubs’s eyes narrowing in keen interest. “This is true, I know. But you aren’t the only sun in charge of a life-system, and nearly all accommodate some kind of visitation. The number of celestials a life-system can accommodate without affecting the atmosphere isn’t anything to scoff at either, and many have already dug into the metrics of your own system, Cub, despite your continued insistence that it is more fragile than what is reality. I will have these numbers double and triple checked, then halve it, and that will be the final tourist population you will be accommodating. I can assure you, no life will be harmed. But I think you already knew that.”
Oh god. Oh god.
But Bdubs wasn’t finished.
“Additionally, I understand it’s been many, many years since your initial training, and that’s a lot to forget, truly it is. You seem to have forgotten how to act, and we can’t have anything but the best for your future visitors, yes? Your sun training aids will be reinstated, and I am personally appointing Scar to supervise. You will be delivered the dates personally, and be included in all planning meetings to ensure this goes smoothly.”
Cub felt his blood run cold. He wanted to speak, argue, but his voice seemed to have left him completely. This- This had to be some kind of prank or some- some- he didn’t know! He opened his mouth to try and negotiate- anything, he’d take it all, he’d take the whole universe in his system, but not the training aids. He couldn’t do that again.
No words left him.
Cub looked to his right, stunned. Scar was smiling.
#hermitcraft#hermitcraft fic#hermitfic#gtws#goodtimeswithscar#mumbo jumbo#cubfan135#bdoubleo100#bdubs#hermitshipping#convex#convexweek
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sodapop patrick curtis thoughts on my desk by the end of the week or ur DONE /j
How I feel about this character
Uh like he’s perfect and should be my wife i think
Nah but fr Soda’s one of my favorite characters ever. He’s sweet and all, but he’s so much more than that. Pony says he’s movie-star handsome, that he can go from gentle one minute to “blazing with anger” the next, that he gets drunk just on living, and understands everybody. Soda’s a Kerouac-style “mad one”- “mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes Awww!”
He’s a guy who’s sensitive but strong, a “bawl baby” who’s tough, he’s probably got ADHD and dyslexia, the school system failed him. His folks died and left him holding his brothers together by a thread. He’s pretty but not pretty enough for Sandy to stay. He might end up dying in Vietnam, and thank God that isn’t canon, but it’s still there. He’s happy to live life simply, behind a white picket fence with a wife and kids- hell, he’s thrilled to. But that’s not gonna happen, at least not for a while, because Soda is a tragedy. But he loves his brothers and his friends so much that he becomes a beacon of hope despite it all.
I love Soda. Honestly, this barely scratches the surface of how I feel about him. I haven’t even touched on the adrenaline junkie stuff or the ways he’s sometimes so relatable to me that it hurts.
All the people I ship romantically with this character
Steve, and sometimes Evie.
I’ve found I’m a friends-to-lovers enjoyer, so Stevepop scratches that part of my brain lol. To have someone who’s got your back through thick and thin, aware of your flaws but in spite of them- well, ain’t that the dream? The angst of it being the 60s makes it interesting to me too, because there’s a lot of ways to handle that. Man, when I first read the book I didn’t get the hype for them at all, but idk. It clicked. I get it now.
And then Steviepop is my roman empire lol. It’s all I love about Stevepop, but Evie adds even more complexity. I like her a lot and I love writing her, and I love writing her with characters who I also love. There is absolutely no canon anything to back this ship up. But dammit that’s the point of fandom.
I will say though that I like exploring Soda’s dynamic with Sandy, but I don’t really ship them. I think the fact that Sandy left him (and I mean cheated on him, even if that can be read ambiguously) implies that there’s something about him that could be undesirable, romantically. I don’t mean cheating is good or that people deserve it, just that in this case, the idea that Soda’s an imperfect boyfriend adds layers to a character who is mostly just positives. We’ll never know Sandy’s POV on it, and I don’t think Soda will either. Sandypop to me will never have closure. That’s what makes it hurt so much. That’s what makes it relatable
My non-romantic OTP for this character
I mean honestly? Steve. I know this isn’t really fair, since I like Stevepop and all, but idk, there’s no one else who I think it could be.
Steve’s a character who’s cocky and troubled and prone to assholeish-ness, but even he loves Soda. He knows about Sandy and gets angry on Soda’s behalf at Pony for mentioning her, which means Soda can tell him- angry, tough Steve Randle- about sensitive stuff. And Soda, who I think is a little in love with everyone he meets and could have anyone he wants, sees this bastard and sticks with him. He sees the parts of Steve that Pony can’t. Parts that make him worthy of being his best buddy.
It’s been said before, but no matter how you look at it, romantic or platonic, they’re each other’s person. I don’t think I could put anyone else in this slot.
My unpopular opinion about this character
I have a few lol.
1- I see a lotta fics and takes where the whole “drunk on living” thing is a lie Soda feeds Ponyboy, and while I like that take, I do also think it’s totally possible and even plausible that Soda really doesn’t drink and Pony’s view of him (in that aspect) is right.
I dunno, I mean, I know firsthand what it’s like to just get drunk on adrenaline/excitement. Adrenaline is a hell of a drug, and the rush from it is better than any other high I’ve had. Thrill rides make me act as stupid as someone drinking- when I’m excited, I lose all ability to filter thoughts or fight impulses. I’ve done all sorts of dumb moves- climbing onto tables, singing loudly without knowing or caring if it bothers people, play-fighting my buddies so hard we both get genuinely injured, standing up in a convertible going down the freeway... (This is obviously anecdotal and not real evidence or anything, but like, duh. This is an opinion piece lol.)
I guess what I’m saying is that there’s a lot of interesting things that can still be done with a Soda who genuinely doesn’t drink. (Or at least not much.)
2- I love darker takes on Soda. I love when people dig into his addictive personality, his temper, his relationship with his looks/self image, all that stuff. I love his flaws, and I especially love when they co-exist with his earnest sweetness and genuine sensitivity. In a few of my fics, I’ve explored some slightly darker Sodas- Sodas who are impulsive, pent up, semi-narcissistic and occasionally manipulative. I haven’t delved deep into it or anything, and I usually keep his character wholesome, but I love it when other folks don’t.
3- I actually really like the Vietnam War storyline. I mean it hurts, but it seems plausible. I hate the idea of him dying there, but I like exploring the idea of him being drafted. Hell, maybe he even enlisted. The military is known for being a good way to earn enough money to pull one’s family out of poverty, and this paired with the flawed ideas of masculinity and strength of the time lead to a really interesting version of Soda’s future.
I’m real glad it isn’t canon though.
4- This isn’t technically unpopular but brown eyed Soda will always be canon to me. I like Rob Lowe’s Soda a lot but man….he coulda used brown contacts, yk? /hj lol
One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.
Well I still think it’s a crime his emotional monologue got cut outta the original version of the film. Thank God for the full novel version, but man, still.
Woulda also have been cool to see him mentioned in That Was Then This is Now, but I get that SE Hinton wasn’t trying to make an Outsiders sequel really.
Idk, Soda served his purpose, I think.
tl;dr- I love him
#sodapop curtis#the outsiders sodapop#soda curtis#the outsiders#the outsiders 1983#stevepop#rambling#ask game#ask#sodapop curtis my beloved#i actually initially wanted to dislike Soda when I first read the book cos his description annoyed me#(i was newly 15 and was jealous of all boys prettier than me which is /ridiculous/ to admit but whatever)#…but i couldn’t dislike him even when I tried. he’s just so…/good/. idk soda’s such a great character#maybe not the most plot-important but he makes the book so much better just by existing. it wouldn’t be as good without him.#ALSO sorry this took a minute to reply to anon! I love Soda and I had to do him justice yk?#long post
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the one where you get married 💫
summary: snapshots of your proposal, wedding planning, bachelorette party, the big day, and the public reaction to it all
vicious speaks: i’m not telling you to listen to never stop (wedding version) by safetysuit while reading this, but i do highly recommend it.
zayn masterlist
requests: open
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liked by zayn, yourmom, yourbff, taylorswift and others
yourusername anything interesting happen while we were away?
tagged zayn
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zayn thank you for saying yes 🤍
↳ yourusername you made it easy 🖤
yourbff BITCH FT ME RIGHT NOW
↳ yourusername as you wish 🤭
yourmom i knew the whole time 😉
liked by yourusername, and zayn
yourcousin not you announcing your engagement in a vacay photo dump 😭 congrats 🍾
liked by zayn, yourusername, and others
↳ yourusername it had to be done lol thank u!!
yoursister oh my gosh 🥹 we need a girls night immediately
↳ yourusername absolutely! this weekend?
liked by yoursister
friend1 congrats 🥳🫶🏼
liked by yourusername and zayn
taylorswift congratulations on this new chapter! eagerly waiting for the big day 🩷
liked by zayn and yourusername
↳ yourusername thank you ☺️ expect your invite in the mail 💌
↳ friend2 i still can’t believe you’re friends with taylor swift
↳ yourusername I still can’t believe i’m friends with taylor swift
mammamalik ❤️
liked by yourusername and zayn
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liked by zayn, youraunt, yoursister and others
yourusername life lately 🥰
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youraunt that smile!! i’ve never seen someone so happy to plan a wedding ☺️
liked by zayn
↳ yourusername he’s so eager to take part in everything, i love it 😭
friend1 if my future fiancé isn’t this happy to help plan our wedding, i don’t want him
liked by yourusername and zayn
yoursister those dresses are so beautiful
↳ yourusername i know!! it was so hard to choose between them 🫠
zayn nice flowers, i wonder who gave them to you 🧐
↳ yourusername hmm, i wonder 👀
↳ friend2 stop flirting, it’s making me feel lonely ☹️
↳ zayn let us play matchmaker for you
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yourbff let the bachelorette shenanigans commence!
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yourusername: it’s gonna be so much fun!!
↳ zayn counting down the days ‘til you’re mine forever 🤍
↳ yourusername i can’t wait to marry you 🥹💕
friend1 bring on the chaos 😌
yoursister gonna be a wild weekend 🍾
↳ zayn not too wild, right?
↳ friend2 no promises 😈
yourcousin stripper on standby 😏
↳ yourusername LMAO STOP
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yoursister has added to their stories
replies:
yourcousin i still can’t believe our little baby is all grown up and getting married!! 🥺
↳ yoursibling i knooow, i’m so emotional!!
yourusername those drinks were so good, i’ll take five more 😉
↳ yoursister anything for you 🫡
zayn please come back in one piece
↳ yoursister lmao we’ll try
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yourbff today’s the day!! 💍🥂
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yourusername thank you for being the absolute best maid of honor 🫶🏼
↳ yourbff thank you for trusting me with the role 💗
zayn 🎉
friend1: our girl’s getting hitched!!
friend2 this is MY royal wedding 🤭
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1dupdates the boys recently on their stories! they’re definitely fucking with us 😭
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username1 i just know they’re seeing our reactions and laughing
username2 okay but they’re all dressed up pretty nicely…maybe it’s some kind of event?
↳ username3 hopefully we’ll find out soon
username4 hear me out… yourbff liked this post, what if zayn and y/n are tying the knot?
↳ username5 okay grandma let’s get you to bed
↳ username6 no, no, let them speak!!
↳ username7 they’re so private, i could see them getting married without even announcing an engagement. and zayn is the only one who didn’t post to his story even though we all know they’re in the same place…🧐
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replies:
yourusername 🥹🫶🏼
yourbff it’s tiiiiime 🥳
yoursister let’s get this show on the road!
friend1 see you 🔜
friend2 ready for the wedding of the year 💕
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zayn All mine, for a lifetime 🤍
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yourusername I love you, i can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together 💘
liked by zayn, yoursibling and others
username1 WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
username2 not him just casually dropping wedding pics when we didn’t even know they were ENGAGED
harrystyles Beautiful ceremony ❤️
liked by zayn, yourusername and others
nialhoran Y/n is a lovely woman! Wishing you both a lifetime of happiness 💛
liked by zayn, your username and others
louist91 Congrats on breaking the internet!
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↳ username3 lmaoo harry and niall left nice comments and then there’s louis
username4 well, at least now we know why they were all in italy last month 😭
yourbff words can’t describe how happy i am for you two!!
yourcousin welcome to the family 🩷 (officially)
yoursister finally, i’ve been dying to post photos!!
mammamalik I love you both ❤️
↳ yourusername Love you so much <3 Thank you for being one of my rocks during this time!!
↳ zayn We love you, mum ❤️
username5 as much as i’d love if her socials were public, i respect her wish for privacy
liked by yourusername
username6 you all roasted me last month when i said the boys were in town for zayns wedding, but look who was right!!!
↳ username7 i always believed you bestie
taylorswift The most beautiful wedding i’ve ever been to! Congratulations, love you 💖
yourusername Thank you for coming, i love you 🫶🏼
↳ zayn ❤️
username8 TAYLOR FUCKING SWIFT WAS THERE??? i’m never recovering from this
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yourusername you are my life, my love, my only 💛
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zayn i love you
yourusername i love you 💘
friend1 can’t believe it’s already been a month since the royal wedding!!
↳ yourusername please 😭
mammamalik The most magical day ✨
↳ yourusername it was like something out of a fairytale 🥹
yourmom still can’t believe my baby is married! i love you two so much 🤍
↳ yourusername i love you!!!!
↳ zayn love you ❤️
friend2 it was such a beautiful day, i felt like i was in a movie
liked by yourusername and zayn
youraunt happy 1 month!!
↳ yourusername thank you 🫶🏼
#zayn malik x reader#zayn x reader#zayn malik x you#zayn malik x y/n#zayn malik smau#zayn malik fic#zayn fic#zayn malik imagine#zayn malik fake instagram#zayn malik fanfic#zayn malik fluff#zayn malik#zayn#1d x reader#1d x you#1d x y/n#1d fic#1d imagine#1d fluff#1d smau#1d#one direction x reader#one direction#smau#sogoodtoheritsvicious
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Ten Years Gone {d.w.}
Hi everyone!! This is my first Dean Winchester fic! Please let me know what you think of it, happy reading!
Summary: Dean hasn't been out of Purgatory for long, and Sam told him that he wants out of the family business, at least for now. Dean finds himself in a small town on the coast of Maine, where he runs into a mysterious woman; she makes him question his own retirement. Will they fall in love or will they fall apart? Will Dean actually step away from the job? And what is this woman hiding from him? Warnings: slight aggression. +18 MDNI (even though there’s nothing R rated in this)
—
It’s late on a Tuesday night, the jukebox is humming in the corner of the bar playing slow country music. The air smells of liquor that’s dried on most surfaces of this place, a smell that’ll cling to your clothes until you wash them. It was the kind of late where only the restless or wrecked hung around, and tonight, Dean Winchester felt like both.
He sat at a table nursing a whiskey, tracing the edge of the glass with his middle finger. The bar was mostly empty, but Dean always made it a point to observe even when it’s not needed; the bartender wiping down the counter, two guys at a table loudly arguing about whether the Bruins are going to the playoffs or not, and a woman a few seats away from Dean, scribbling away in a notebook. He can’t tell if she comes here often or if she’s in the same boat he’s in, restless. Making sure to keep a watchful eye on her, especially since she’s the only woman in the building.
Dean shifted in his seat, trying not to think about the fact that he’s on the road by himself, again. It wasn’t the first time his brother needed a break from this life, and it wouldn’t be the last. They’ve been hunting nonstop for eight years, and after everything Sam has been through with the demons and Lucifer, the Leviathan’s and not knowing if Dean was dead or not for a year—he was bound to crack. The two of them fought over the fact that Sam didn’t hunt for a year, that Kevin was abducted and nothing was done about it. Sam was adamant about stepping away for a while, so he’s with his girl, while Dean is on the lookout for The Prophet.
For some reason this time feels different. Dean’s gotten older, he’s not young and stupid anymore, and he sure as hell has been through the wringer more than he’d like to be. He has a hard time lying to himself that he’s fine on his own. He needs Sam. The feeling of crippling anxiety that won’t cease is new, and it’s a feeling that’s not easily quieted by liquor. His hand shakes while he downs the remainder of his whiskey. The job is his life but is his life worth the job? It’s a hard decision to make, almost impossible.
He was so lost in his thoughts he almost didn’t notice that the woman had gotten up and started walking towards the bar. She distanced herself as far away from the other two men as she could then ordered, “A margarita with a salt rim and a double whiskey, please.” It didn’t take long for them to notice that she’d gone up there. Dean didn’t like the looks of them, they had a mischievous gleam in their eyes when looking at her. One of the Bruins fans stood up and advanced towards the bar.
“Hey there, pretty lady,” the man slurred, propping himself up against the counter. “What do ya say I buy your drinks for ya, sweetheart?”
Dean sighed, his grip tightening around his glass. He knows how these movies end, and they don’t end well.
The woman didn’t so much as flinch, without turning to look at him, she said, “I can take care of it myself, thanks.”
Her voice was cold and sharp, the kind of tone that could cut through steel, but the drunkard didn’t take the hint. He leaned in closer. She could smell the alcohol on his breath, see his eyes narrow in determination, and sense his bad intentions.
“Aw, come on honey. Let me treat ya, then maybe we can head back to my place, if you know what I’m sayin’?”
“I said no. Walk. Away.” Her gaze finally snapping to him, one so chilling that it could turn a man to stone if she tried hard enough.
Dean was not expecting her to be as harsh and as direct with the guy, he admired that. He knew that a guy like this wouldn’t take no for an answer, so he pushed out of his chair loudly and started to make his way towards them.
As she was turning to leave the counter, the guy grabs her by her bicep and pulls her into him, “You’re a good for nothing bitch, is what you are–”
Dean walks faster, boots thudding against the worn out floorboards. “Hey!” he barked. His voice low and dangerous as he got right in the drunk’s face. “When a lady says no, you listen. Now, let her go before this gets ugly.”
The man sneered then released her, muttering curses under his breath as he stumbled back to his friend. Dean turns to the bartender, his expression sharp. “And you–what kind of place are you running where this shit flies? Do better.”
He turns around to meet the woman, “You okay?”
She nods, her hardened features softening just a fraction at his kindness. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”
“It’s not a problem, Miss..?”
“Novena.” She smiles up at Dean and reaches her hand out to shake his.
“I’m Dean.” He gave her a warm smile back and took her hand in his. Her handshake was firm, he’s even more impressed.
“I was actually getting you a drink, believe it or not.” Her voice was rid of any trace of bitterness that had been there before, “I saw you sitting by yourself and you looked upset. Thought I’d bring you another round.”
“Thank you, I definitely need it.” Dean takes the glass from her, his fingers brushing against hers. Novena tenses up and her gaze immediately meets his, but within a second her state of shock is gone. Dean notices but doesn’t think too much of it. He doesn’t mean to be cocky, but a lot of girls in the past have frozen up around him before. Usually from being a flirt but he’s made no effort tonight—maybe he still has the juice after all.
Novena gives him another smile, then makes her way back towards her seat. This was the first act of kindness anyone has shown him since he got back from purgatory, and it was refreshing. A total stranger noticed that he wasn’t doing alright. He had been standing in the same spot, staring into space long enough for the bartender to give him the look of, “dude, you good?” He wasn’t good, but maybe he could distract himself from his anxiety for a little while, she was mysterious and that intrigued Dean.
Making his way over to her slowly, he notices that she had been making a sketch of someone. “Mind if I sit with you?” She closes her book when she hears his voice, as if not to be caught with her doodle. “I know it’s late and I, I don’t wanna seem like that scumbag over there—“
“Sit. I can tell a tortured soul when I see one,” she gestures with her hand for him to take the chair opposite from her. Novena emphasizes, “Please.”
Also not what he was expecting, but her voice was calm. Demanding but gentle. He does as he’s told.
“Yes ma’am.” They stare at each other, scanning each other's features in a way that is more intimate than it should be. Dean finally speaks up, “So, if you’re a tortured soul like me, what’re you doing out so late on a Tuesday?”
Novena sighs and takes a sip of her drink, “There’s a lot going on but to keep it sweet and simple, my dad recently passed, my boyfriend, well…ex now, destroyed my car when I ended things,” with sad eyes, she looks down at her fingers, fiddling with one of the rings she has on. She clears her throat before asking, “What about you, Mr-New-In-Town? What brings you into The Salty Dog?”
Dean lets out a small chuckle at her enthusiasm when saying the name of the bar, but says seriously, “I’m sorry to hear about your dad, I am. It’s not easy losing a parent,” He takes a swig of his whiskey, thinking of Bobby especially. “I uh, lost my father figure not too long ago as well.”
“Oh god, I’m so sorry.” Novena’s brows furrow and she places her hand over Dean’s so naturally, gently rubbing her thumb over the top of his knuckles.
He’s taken aback by this, he almost jumps at her touch. His eyes dart to hers and he’s met with empathy and compassion; there’s a lump in his throat that’s unbelievably painful with the grief that’s been hidden away. Not one soul has been able to break through Dean’s wall as easily as the woman before him. His eyes are jumping from their hands to the table, scoping out the rest of the bar to see if anyone is paying attention, which no one was, then back up to Novena. Tears were threatening to escape the corners of his eyes and once he saw that her mascara had run down her face, was when Dean let go. She removed her hand from his, leaned over the small table, cupped his face and wiped away the dampness on his skin.
It almost felt like Novena was taking away his pain with her touch, and it looked like it too. The eye contact hadn’t broke since he looked up at her. Dean was a mess and he couldn’t decipher if what he was seeing was a figment of his imagination or not—but it seemed like his struggle was held within her eyes? There was this humming noise that was coming from somewhere, the jukebox or the overhead lights maybe, that was soothing. Ultimately easing Dean to breathe slower and to quiet his racing thoughts.
“I, I don’t know what that was.” Dean whispers, “I’m sorry, that’s embarrassing. This never happens to me…” he gestures at himself.
Novena pulled away from him concerningly, “Showing human emotion never happens to you?”
“Wow—that’s not what I was expecting you to say. But, yeah. I usually don’t allow myself to show people how I’m feeling. To be frank, I don’t know why I’m telling you this. Long day I suppose.”
She didn’t know how to respond to him. He’s different from other men she’s met, that’s a given. Dean almost immediately crumbled under her touch. It felt like he was begging to let someone in, wanting to be understood. If they hadn’t mentioned that they’ve both lost someone dear to them, then Dean probably wouldn’t have been easy to get a reading from. Novena liked that he related so much to her, that Dean felt so deeply that his emotions had transferred through their touch.
He was trying to brush off what had just happened. Novena could see it in his eyes, that he was questioning the intense moment they shared. Dean covered his face with both of his hands and sighed. This was the perfect moment to change subjects.
“I better get going, it’s getting late–I have to be up early for work. But I’ll see you around?”
—
A/N: Any and all feedback is appreciated! Feel free to send me asks or dm’s :)) I'm just making things up as I go, so be patient with me lol. This will be multiple parts as well as blurbs. I have a busy schedule but I’m going to try my best to write these chapters cuz I’m really obsessed with the idea I have!
tags! @ambiguous-avery
#dean winchester#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural#spn#supernatural fanfic series#supernatural fanfic#dean winchester fanfic#dean winchester x ofc#writing#angels-silhouette
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I just can’t find the center of the grief, I can’t find the source. I didn’t like who I was then, I do like who I am now, I wasn’t happy then, I am happy now, why do I want so badly to go back? why do I miss her so much? i’ve done everything right, i’ve built a life I love and am genuinely happy in, I’m doing better than I have in my entire life, why do I feel like I’m making a mistake? why do I feel like I was supposed to be her, not me? why do I feel like i’ve failed?
#like. ok it’s probably growing up in a cult like environment that constantly reaffirmed the idea that if u leave you’ll never be truly happy#or that I got fucking brain damage from ptsd and i’m never going to accomplish what I once thought I would#or that everything I am is a disappointment to my family#and even though I’m happy and I love my life#I can’t escape the feeling that everyone else would’ve loved me more as her#idk. maybe I need a therapist#vent
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i love you royal trio (minus akechi)
#i was listening to the world we knew by frank sinatra while drawing this to inflict maximum emotional damage 😔#royal actually shot me fifty times in the chest and slaughtered my entire family#i’m actually inconsolable over the ending what the fuck do you mean akechi chooses to die of his own volition rather than be manipulated#god it’s just. his character actually makes me violent and insane. they’re going to drag me kicking and screaming to the psych ward#he never had an ounce of control over his life. not even once. he was CONSTANTLY being yanked around like a marionette#until he was disposed of as another pawn in shido’s plan#and then out of some cruel irony he was resurrected even though he did not want to be alive#for once in death he would have found peace—only for that to be taken from him too.#and bc he thinks he’s worthless and his life is so easily gambled away he doesn’t view it as a major dealbreaker when maruki brings it up#“do you really think something as trivial as my life should stand in the way of your decision?” yes you fucking asshole#what do you mean he’s literally fated to die in every timeline? definition of doomed by the narrative#there’s not a single version of his story that doesn’t end with him being slaughtered#GODDDDD he makes me violently ill i hate goro akechi so much he’s so fucking selfish HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT THIS DEAL IS TEARING ME APART#i was so tempted to get the bad ending just so that he was alive ☹️#he looked so happy. he was surrounded by people who loved and treasured him.no shido. control over his life. the ability to choose his futu#TEARS IN MY EYES MARUKI WAS THE ONLY VILLAIN WHO WAS LOWKEY MAKING SENSE 😭😭😭😭😭#my toxic trait is that i think maruki was right all along 😔#ALSO SUMIRE AAUUGGHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#the survivors guilt literally eating her alive until the point where she gaslighted herself into thinking she was her sister. insane.#royal was so good bro i’m so glad i endured 200 hours of hell just to play it#terrible terrible ending with everyone going their separate ways and ren ending up in juvie for months#akechi actually being dead in the good ending is so fucked up 😭😭 i thought there was some way maruki could bring him back regardless#not ren hallucinating him in the last cutscene too 😭😭😭😭 “i still see your shadows in my room” ahh ending#persona 5 royal#persona 5#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#sumire yoshizawa#goro akechi#lotus draws
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I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life and. I just feel like crying over that fact. a few years ago I was sure I’d be an anxious miserable wreck for my entire life but now I wake up and I love the world and I promise one day you will too. please keep going please hold the world tight. you will giggle at something silly with a stranger. a staff member at a place you frequent will smile when they see you. an elderly person will look at you gratefully for helping them. you’ll cry about stupid stuff and laugh about it later. you’ll drink cold water during a hot day and it will be the best sensation ever. being alive is the best thing I’ve ever experienced.
#WWWAAUUUGGHGH#IM VERY EMOTIONAL. I love living I love the earth I love my friends so much#it was. so bad a few years ago#panic attacks every other day. miserable most of the time. unhealthy habits. every day felt like a bad day#but then I managed to get out of an awful situation. and I made an effort to try and love the place I live now as WELL as being homesick *#* for my home country. and I fought to notice the little things. and I went outside even when I haaated the idea of it#and now???? I’m still disabled. I still have anxiety. I’m not yet back in my home country#but my god I’m so happy in life. it does get better. everyone was right#even though I experience severe chronic pain on the daily. even though I live somewhere noisy and hot and crowded.#life is silly that way :3 I promise it gets better. it’s so cliche and it never sounds true but it is. it is#hopepunk
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