#and drinking/getting drugged up ain't the way I will achieve that
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Me, being a damn freight-train of productivity for two weeks, with only minor energy crashes once a week: "Okay, doing... Super good. Keep the momentum, just keep the momentum going, we'll be able to rest once the place is set up atleast a lil bit and Piki can come here with me-"
*unexpected delays in plans, ppl not answering my calls because of said delays and workload juggling, UPRAVNA ENOTA, unexpected expenses, and other things that kept happening in these two weeks that were building up, catching up with me*
Me, waking up very much NotOkay™️: "O-okay, let's survive this, we'll survive this, it will be fine, we can have a proper crash after this week-"
My period, that I knew was coming:
Me:
#moca grumbles#i need to buy myself some fucking blueberry/regular grape juice to get through this shit#roleplay an alcoholic so I don't become one because damn it is so tempting#got family history with it tho so no thanks. not ruining my life with cocktails/vodka/national treasures of the chicken shaped homeland#got to figure out a way to really fucking Relax without sleeping for two days in a row after a stressful active period#and drinking/getting drugged up ain't the way I will achieve that#vent#I need sleep but CAN'T REALLY GET THAT RN#fucked up my sleep schedule and want to unfuck it b4 my pissbaby comes here if possible#... which is this or next week#AND I'll have to deal with mother#*turns into a weeping puddle of goo* this is fine
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Only One Way [WIP]
I'm scared of growing up cause everything has a price Damn it would be nice to get away from this life Time and time again I put my heart on this ice That froze away my soul of gold now I can't stand being nice I know I got a lot to learn because I'm still a young'n Gotta struggle through the grind and make my something outta nothing But struggle's all I got when I was looking for some loving Damn that sounds depressing but I guess it was something I picked apart what makes me me till I lost track of the picture Drowning in my sorrows or maybe it was the liquor I try to get back up but I don't know if I still got it I gave it all just to be free and now mind is steady rotting Take me away I wanna see stars without the lights The love without the fights No drugs and still delyght Maybe it's too late Never planned to stay forever Promises are to be broken like love that turns to never Never had it Never gave it Never seen it Never craved it Just lies upon lies Or maybe I'm just too jaded A 20 year old with the heart of a war vet Broken beyond repair and my life ain't even start yet I try and I try but what have I achieved Just running in circles chasing my broken dreams If I wore shirts I'd have my heart all on my sleeve But maybe it's best this way cause this world isn't meant for me Take me away I wanna fly till I'm up over the clouds Done smoking loud Don't need no drinks when I'm out I wanna be proud of who I see when I look in the mirror But I don't know who's looking back Ain't that strange? Yeah I feel ya
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Bea & Lola & Ronnie & Charlie
1st attempt at group chat style
Bea: Celebrations are in order! Who's in and where do we start? Lola: Hell yeah count me in! 🎉 pre-game at ours if we're stocked? 🍸💊 Ronnie: Finally ditched the freckled dead weight, yeah? I'll drink to that Charlie: Lmao Charlie: We were good last time I checked but if not sounds like princess is in the treating mood, yeah? 😉 Good news all 'round Bea: Since when do you need a reason? 🤔 but I got a first, if you must know Bea: I'll be round in a bit then, save me some, Lola talking specifically to you now, know a losing battle when I see one Ronnie: since we ain't all getting bankrolled by the student loan. fitzy that's where you're wrong bitch we out Lola: Yes girl! 🤗 I got you and will be keeping suitable 💊 from the mouths of these babes 😏 Congrats on being a brainbox confirmed too btw Lola: if someone ☝ stayed outta my stuff we're good 🤞 Ronnie: fuck you. sharing's caring Bea: says THE most selfish one in this chat ok Bea: and thanks Lo 😘 Ronnie: get off my tits princess Charlie: even the club drugs??? why you been doing them alone in the middle of the day you nutter 😂 ah well Lola: They were mine and I took them Thursday 👍 Bea: tits, where??? Charlie: children please! there's always a dealer with a dick to suck, we don't need to eat each other quite yet, chill out or you need some of that too Charlie: Christ Ronnie: on it, no complaints outside of this chat like Charlie: He'll be devvo its not me 😕 Ronnie: if I was scoring from big dom then yeah but like fuck am I going that far for you cunts Lola: he asked me if I wanted a free tat last time I went 😕 looking to branch out or just touch my body with needles? No way to know Bea: God, Lola, do not ⛔ its free hepatitis is what it is, Charlie already dicing with death there 😷 Grotty Ronnie: fuck it they're treatable 'cept for A Ronnie: shit at drawing though so forget that like Bea: 🙄 well then, go ahead and catch 'em all like pokemon, aim for those mid-grades though, over-achieving will get you 💀 Ronnie: reckon its too late for that. he's sound though 'cept this art on my arm looking like a dog's dick Ronnie: all I got from him Lola: have you even shown me that? 👀 viewing party tonight too please Charlie: Didn't think that was your thing Lolly? As long as it's attached to a dog you're into it? 😵 alright our kid 😬 Lola: Shut your gob Charlie! 🖕 Bea: you WANT to be insulted, masochist 💘 if it was decent it wouldn't match the rest, man knows your aesthetic if nothing else Charlie: 😂 soz babe Ronnie: fuck off and get a tramp stamp you sket Bea: good one 👍 bitter you won't get to see Ronnie: nah I'm bitter that he hasn't written that cunt's name on you yet. guarantees a break up like Bea: Whoever could you be talking about? You're so unclear about your feelings, so mysterious Lola: guys this is not a party atmosphere! I wanna wreck my head in a good way Lola: Calm the tits you both have please Charlie: Agreed, now everyone say thank you to Ronnie for going on the drugs run Charlie: THANK YOU RONNIE 💖 Ronnie: what happened to not eating me out fitz? you strike out last night or what? Lola: I'll say it when I get my share not before 😏 Charlie: I'm trying to create a party atmosphere, silly bitch Charlie: What says party better than oral? Ronnie: we haven't had an orgy for ages, miss me that much yeah? Bea: only domestics these days, init? Charlie: not in front of the children, please Lola: 🤒 Lola: thanks for the mental scars Ronnie: any time Bea: Well, you've really brought me down Bea: Get a better night out if I stayed here, saying something 🙄 Ronnie: knock you down if you want Bea: I was asking for a good time, not necessarily in pissing myself at you trying but if that's all you've got, babe Ronnie: this bitch Bea: Yeah, I am. Lola: 😂 you two kill me Charlie: so much unresolved sexual tension Charlie: its getting to us all Charlie: sort it out lads Lola: speak for yourself ✌ Ronnie: she couldn't turn me on if her boyfriend's life depended on it you filthy scrote Ronnie: porn hub's here for you lad, use it Bea: Oh, please. You're never off, out here panting like a dog. Bea: And you can dream on too, Charlie. NEVER going to happen. Ronnie: something to fucking agree on Ronnie: around you I'm dead below the waist cheers for that Ronnie: like im on ket Charlie: You both know it will 🌈😍🎆 and it will be magical Bea: Welcome. Perhaps you could use the moments of clarity to do something with your life. Ronnie: I'm scoring for you right now princess so go fuck yourself Bea: One for the CV, I'm sure. Bea: If you thought I was thanking you, or going down on you...I'd be quicker to get my own. 👑 remember? Get it flown in from Columbia before that Ronnie: get your fucking own then Ronnie: i asked for neither that's fitzys wet dream Bea: Always quick to martyr yourself Bea: No one asked you to go get the gear Bea: and you took it all in the first place so; what's your issue here? Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: you're a cunt that's every day's issue Lola: 🤦 Bea: Are you TRYING to make Charlie cum in his pants? Bea: Take that shit private, I've told you both I'm not interested Bea: What, not room for two in this town? Ronnie: no need to try he's pulling himself off as we speak Bea: Well, always nice when they essentially do the job themselves when you're past your prime, I imagine Charlie: I'm ignoring you both, is what I'm doing Charlie: You're both clearly blobbing so we'll save the idea for another day Charlie: Damn 😏 Lola: 🙄 Lola: Charlie I raised you better than that! Charlie: What?! Did you see how cunty the lone rangers were being Charlie: and I say ONE thing Lola: period bants are so 20 years ago boy Lola: know better Lola: Just cos they don't have any idea how to play nice Lola: that's old too Charlie: Who said its bants? Speculation 'bout the state of their knickers if nothing else Charlie: also, I add, probs in a twist Charlie: ba-dum-tss Ronnie: get your head outta my crotch for 5 seconds lad christ Charlie: 🐶 Ronnie: get your red wings from that bitch, just be prepared to be disappointed like, princess talks a good game but that's it like Bea: Yet here you are, all mouth. Bea: Both of you stop projecting your creepy shit, thanks Lola: everyone stop this shit or I bounce, thanks 👌 Lola: I could have a better party on my own at this point Bea: Agreed Bea: I'm staying here, see you around Lo Charlie: Ughhhhhhhhh Charlie: Guys no Lola: Laters then B xx Charlie: I'll even miss the chance to be 'insensitive' and tell you to kiss and make up, alright? Charlie: We're all bored, obvs, we need a party Charlie: Everyone suck it up, we can split up after pre-drinks, so what does it matter Lola: Fine, one more chance 😌 don't fuck it up Lola: Bea you in? Charlie: Ronaldo? Bea: Yeah, whatever Ronnie: suck a dick charlie I was never out Charlie: Well...with that confusing display of enthusiasm, we're back on! Bea get your fine ass on that train, we'll sort the rest between us Charlie: Everyone happy? Lola: �� Ronnie: 🖕 Bea: Nothing and no one's bringing me down 💋
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