#and did I mention that it's a musical. the cheese song. the cheese song.

[chiropteracupola]

pondering the very strange treasure island play from 1964 that I found recently and exactly what it would have been like to see the single performance of this thing where there is no smollett at all (trelawney gets most of his lines?) and silver dies at the end and also there is a song about cheese

[purplestanleypinkblanket]

Clubbing Much to Logan's Distaste:

18+

Pairings: (DP3 Vers.) Logan Howlett x Reader

Summary: Vanessa convinced you to go clubbing with her, claiming that there's 'too much testosterone in that damned apartment.' Logan hadn't realized you two were clubbing until Wade, laughing, shows him a photo of you. Well, Logan greatly dislikes that photo and hunts you down. Vanessa takes advantage of how jealous Logan can get.

Warnings: Heavy drinking, body shots mentioned, age g4p, younger reader (like 21), slight woman on woman (vanessa making logan jealous), angry logan, argument, grinding, drunk reader, sexual themes. 18+, minors don't interact.

Genre: Angst, Slight smut.

Word Count: 1,798

A/N: I've really been wanting to explore various themes, and it's about time I branched into thirsty Logan turf! Feel free to leave feedback, I love knowing what could be improved!

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Vanessa and you swayed on the dance floor, moving to the song 'Nasty Dog' by Sir-Mix-Alot. The club was packed with various sorts of people, all of which you found yourself dancing against as the night progressed. Shot after shot, you found yourself regretting the dress you wore. It was a black off the shoulder, long sleeve dress with a short skirt. As you swayed and danced, grinding your back up against a man you hadn't met before he bought you a shot, you glanced towards Vanessa who was taking a selfie.

"Say cheese!" She announced to you, moving to catch you in the frame. You and the man you moved against.

Wade and Logan found themselves alone in the apartment. It was odd to Logan, he had grown used to you and Wade dancing to suggestive music like 'Goodies' by Ciara in the living room. Tonight was different. You and Vanessa weren't here, and he was alone with Wade who didn't even try to be subtle with his flirts.

"Where's-"

"She's out clubbing with Vanessa." Wade interrupted like a damned mind reader. How had he known Logan was going to ask about you? Logan scowled at Wade, eyes narrowing. And why in hell were you clubbing? Didn't you know how dangerous it was? The ding of Wade's phone interrupted his thoughts. "Holy fuck!" Wade laughed out. "She's getting it on out there!"

"What?" Logan's voice was rougher than usual, strained too. He grabbed Wade's wrist before he could hide his phone. Yanking at the man's wrist, Logan stared at the phone. At the photo of you and Vanessa. Of you...grinding...on another man. "The fuck does she think she's doing?" He erupted with a growl, standing up immediately. The photo still burned in his retinas. The way your skintight dress showed off every inch and curve of your body. That short skirt that was practically nonexistent. The sight of your bare shoulders through the neckline. Logan swore your breasts looked as if they would fall out of it at any given moment.

"Woah there, honey badger." Wade was quick to dive infront of the front door, preventing Logan from leaving.

Vanessa's words echoed in his brain, "Keep Logan here. Make sure he doesn't ruin my girl's night, or I'll-" Wade didn't entirely remember the rest of the threat because God damn did Vanessa look hot when she scolded him.

"Move, lip." Logan growled at him.

"I can't do that." Wade retorted, stretching his body to take up as much of the doorway as possible. "I'd like to keep my dick, and I can't exactly do that if you interrupt their girl's night."

"I don't give a fuck about your dick." Logan huffed, his scowl deepening. Wade was only wasting time by blocking him in. He was going to get you out of that club- even if it meant killing his friend along the way. Or, at least, trying to.

Vanessa and you move against one another, the previous partners you two danced with long forgotten. She knew she had Wade, and that Logan practically claimed you without actually claiming you...but it was still a fun game to play. To flirt with you, to tease you, whether it was friendly or more. It was once only friendly, but after seeing Logan's reaction to when she straddled you and did your make up as you stroked her thighs- well, how could she not amp it up? Vanessa was just as bad as Wade, truth be told. She loved watching Logan's nostrils flare in angered jealousy, in possessiveness. However, he would never interrupt the situation with you present. If he did, then you'd learn how much he wanted you. And that was outright unacceptable. You were too young, too innocent. He felt guilt for even thinking about you. There were plenty of other men your age- but God did he wish you never looked at them.

With your back facing the door as you did a body shot off of Vanessa, Logan's form bursting through the club door went unnoticed by you. His eyes immediately landed on your mouth moving to the shot glass resting in between Vanessa's chest. She had noticed him first and, with a smug smirk. her hand moved to your hair, tugging at it as you downed the shot. Her tongue ran up your face along where a small drip of tequila escaped your mouth. Her eyes remained on his the entire time. Anger coursed through him as he watched you drunkenly melt into her seductions. With clenched teeth, Logan stormed forward to where you and Vanessa were at the bar. Her legs moving to wrap around your hips as she lifted your chin, murmuring a quick apology in your ear.

"Sorry, Hun'" Was all she could get out before you suddenly felt your arm being yanked. Your eyes widened in surprise when you were brought face to face with Logan, who's nose was scrunched in a furious scowl at you.

"Oh-hey, Lo." You smiled brightly at him. His nose scrunched more in distaste. You reeked of alcohol; he could barely even smell the normal scent of you that he adored.

"The hell do you think you're doing?" He spoke through clenched teeth, the vein in his neck popping slightly.

"Um...having fun?" You replied sassily, flashing your own drunk scowl at him.

"That was having fun?" He scoffs, posture straightening as he began to yank your arm.

"Hey, now wait a damn minute!" You huffed, grabbing at a nearby railing that isolated the bar from the dance floor of the club. "I aint going anywhere!"

"The hell you are!" Logan was in your face before you could react, using the only thing he knew- intimidation. He expected you to back down, or at least murmur a smart-ass comment as you surrendered like you always did.

However, you didn't budge. Not this time. You weren't going to be bullied out of having fun. He watched as your cheeks puffed out, a red flush to them from the drinking you had done, your eyes narrowed at him. Your eyebrows furrowed together to in a deadly glare.

"Princess, now is not the time." Logan started, moving to pull your arm once more. You stood your ground firmly, unmoving.

"Don't you princess me, mister. I'm staying." You huffed out, snatching your arm from his grasp as you crossed them over your chest. His eyes flicked to your breasts for a second, he could feel a groan in the back of his throat just at the sight of them. They looked like they'd spill out of your dress's neckline at any minute. He both loved and hated it.

"No, you arnt." He battled.

"You can either stay and party with Vanessa and I or you can leave."

"I aint staying."

"Then you can leave."

"You aint staying either."

"Yes. I. Am."

"Princess..."

"Face it, Lo. I'm not leaving. Now you can either man up and dance with me or leave me the fuck alone." Logan watched as you jutted your chin out, directing your face from his. He sighed over dramatically. You were too damn stubborn for your own good. His hand found your hip.

"Fine."

A grin broke onto your lips as you registered his words. Leaping up, you wrapped your arms around his neck. "Oh! This will be so much fun!" Logn instinctively caught you, gently guiding you back to standing on the floor as you leaned against him, staring into his eyes adamantly. He knew it was wrong to relish the way you pressed against him. It was wrong to enjoy it. You were too young for him, he knew it. Too sweet, too innocent. He didn't deserve you, or your attention. But the way you stared at him now, eyes lidded from a sense of...hell, was that affection he saw in your eyes? It was directed at him? Why? Logan made no move to resist as you pulled him to the dance floor of the club, soon grinding your ass against him.

He watched your hands fly above your head, into your hair, and into the air. He forced his ears to focus on your drunk singing instead of the music the club blasted. He couldn't help but find himself entranced by you. Logan's cock twitched as you grinded your rear against him, his hands instinctively found your hips, guiding you how he wanted you to move as he swayed against you. His mouth soon nipping at the revealed skin of your neck and shoulders.

A groan escaped his throat when your hands moved behind you and into his hair. His hand slid off your hip and towards your thigh, slipping under your dress as his fingertips trailed your inner thigh. Logan buried his face into your neck, sniffing deeply to inhale your scent. The disgusting scent of liquor wafted into his nose. You still smelled too much like cheap gin and shots for his liking. He always considered himself a connoisseur for the smell of alcohol, but he found himself hating it on you. He wanted to smell you, not gin or tequila.

His hand slid out from under your skirt, grasping your hips to stop your movements against him.

"Stop." He grunted out, ignoring the way his body ached to have you against him.

"But..." You pouted softly as you looked back at him, however, upon seeing the seriousness of his expression, you stopped. Pulling away, you turned to face him. "What's wrong?" You asked.

"I can't." He decided with a shake of his head.

"Lo, I'm 21, I'm legal and-" You began, you hated the way he distanced himself from you just because of your age.

"I know you are, Princess." Logan interrupted. "Thats not why I'm stopping." He forced his voice to be softer as he spoke to you, knowing the wrong tone could send you into a drunk crying mess.

"Then why...?" Was all you could get out before his lips pressed against yours, silencing you.

"Because I want you to be fully there when I show you why I'm better than all the shitty men you've taken home." Logan murmured; tone filled with venom when he mentioned your previous flings. A hint of possessiveness clear. You found yourself nodding, silently appreciating the fact that he wasn't going to take advantage of you- even if you were the one throwing yourself at him. "Now come on, let me take you home." His voice was demanding but you were confident it was a request.

"Okay." You nodded, moving to interlock your hands. "Let's get Vanessa."

When Wade saw Vanessa storming his way an hour later, and Logan carrying you over towards his room, drunk and asleep, he was glad he had hidden the knives.

[moontyun]

Ateez: The type of...

☆ ateez masterlist ☆ ...partner ☆ requested? no ☆ genre: fluff, attempted humor, slight angst ☆ warning(s): jealousy, mentions of food, mentions of murder(?), mentions of bug death:( ☆ requests are open!

៚ Seonghwa

loves to spend quality time with you

building legos together is what he loved to do best with you

Music played softly in the background, lights were so bright it looked like a surgery suit. He was super focused on the project at hand. His glasses slipping off of his face, as he put the pieces together and read the directions. You sat next to him, putting your own little piece of the set together. It was peaceful, an absolute fun night for the two of you.

៚ Hongjoong

obviously the jealous type

writes you little love songs in his spare time at work

It was late at night, you hadn't expected to stay this late with him at the studio. You were here to drop off his dinner but then he started to ask for your input on some of the things he had been working on. "Okay, I'm going to play you something. It's a bit cheese-y but I want your opinion on it." You agreed as he played the song. Slowly it clicked with you that it was about you. You pouted cutely when it was finished and told him how much you adored it.

៚ Yunho

loves to match with you but in a more show-y way

gets upset when you don't match with him but tries not to show it

Today was your three year anniversary with Yunho. He wanted you to wear matching neon pink t-shirts with flowers all over it. It was the ugliest thing you had ever seen in your life. You had told him you didn't want to wear it because it wasn't up to dress code for where you two were going. His feelings were clearly hurt, but he agreed not to wear it. You cupped his face, "We can wear them to the beach tomorrow when we meet my parents, okay?" His face lit up, clearly okay with it.

៚ Yeosang

packs your lunch, leaving you little notes telling you to have a good day

expects you to call him every day when you get off of work, no matter how late it is for him.

Today, you had the day off. All day you had been lazing around the house, not really doing much of anything. But now, lunch time had come and you were starving. You opened the refrigerator to see a box of tupperware with a little sticky note attached to it. Immediately, you knew Yeosang packed you something to eat. Pulling it out, you read the note. He wished you a good day and that he loved you, as well as to call him while you were eating. He wanted to have lunch with you but couldn't physically be there. He was the absolute best!

៚ San

cuddle bug galore

follows you everywhere you go because he hates being away from you for longer than 10 minutes

"-and so, he told me to kill the bug. I told him hell no!" He had been telling this little story for about five minutes now as you showered with the occasional "mmhmm", "Oh" every couple of minutes to let him know he was being listened to. You were used to him following you everywhere. He was always following you into the bathroom, the store, wherever you were he was there. So him sitting on the toilet, while you showered was not abnormal for the two of you. It was a cute way to show he loved you and wanted to spend all his time with you.

៚ Mingi

you need to reassure him a lot

needs to be cuddled every night before bed

Mingi had been mopey the whole evening. He was laying around, wrapped up in a blanket like a burrito. You having just walked through the apartment door, noticed this. "What's wrong, princess?" you asked, immediately. He didn't say anything but buried himself deeper into the blanket. You waltzed over to him and threw yourself on him, moving the blanket from his face, peppering his face in kisses. "You didn't answer my question earlier." You had to think back, he did text you a question. "Oh! I got busy helping my mom. I'm sorry, baby." He nodded his head, "Just let me know next time please?" he pleaded. You hugged him tighter, "I will, I'm sorry!"

៚ Wooyoung

jealous when someone starts to get too close to you

loves to ramble on and on about his day to you, because he loves having your feed back

You knew this guy had been trying to hit on you all night and you were getting to the point of just throwing a drink in your face. You and Wooyoung kept moving away from him but the guy wouldn't get it. "Should I just kill him? Can I?" You laughed a little. "Let him have it, babe." You said. Wooyoung got close to the guy, "I'm their partner. Get lost." The guy backed off and you hadn't seen him since.

៚ Jongho

always stays on the side closest to the street

protective over you

The first time he did it, it spooked you a little because he switched sides so suddenly. He pushed you to the other side gently, so he could walk along side you. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion as you continued to telling your story. "And so, she was li- I'm sorry, can I ask why you did that?" You asked halting your story. He laughed a little, "Making sure your safe and a car doesn't hit you." Your face flushed, none of your exes had ever done that. Ever since then, he's done it every time you guys were out walking.

[sl33paholics]

Josuke Higashikata Dating / Relationship Headcanons!

(He's so baby lowkey)

Song: Always Forever by Cults

How does he realize that he's in love?

He always finds himself fumbling and stumbling over his words whenever talking to you. Josuke always tries to keep his conversations between you two as SHORT as possible.

He cheeses up whenever your name is mentioned. A huge smile appears on his face, teeth showing and everything. Josuke experiences the butterflies! His heart races so fast, and he's red to the ears. Josuke even tries to get his friends to stop talking about you around him, gets him all jumpy and scared.

Josuke often finds himself daydreaming. Whenever it's so hot Josuke can't focus, or the lesson is too long and boring, he can imagine himself sitting next to you. Just goofing around, passing notes, and cracking jokes. It's only until his teacher slams on his desk to make him snap out of it.

The lovestruck boy feels a longing and yearning for your presence whenever you're not around. If you gotta get to your classes, he'd watch you disappear within the crowd as he wished for you to stay a bit longer.

Without a doubt this man would be jealous as FUCK whenever you're around other people than HIM. Josuke could chuckle and giggle around you and the other person, but as soon as you leave he can't help but have the urge to punch the wall.

What would Josuke do in his private time with his partner?

I can see Josuke enjoying quiet time. He's so energetic around his friends and at school, just being with you throughout the night, watching movies, or talking to each other in general. The boy loves the peace and intimacy together.

Playing video games can be a big factor. Competitive video games always get Josuke pumped and in the mood to overthrow you in any way possible. Just don't be surprised when his mom walks in and shouts at you two to be quiet 🤭

Swapping out and exchanging music tastes. Josuke is going to fein over showing you music like Prince (since it's his favorite artist) the two of you would be listening to people such as David Bowie, Whitney Houston, Jimi Hendrix, Stevie Wonder, and many more all evening.

Cooking together. This. Boy. Can. Not. Cook. For. Shit. Josuke is always relying on you for assistance on whatever meal he wants to make, but he's not embarrassed to learn from his partner to improve on his own skills in the kitchen 🧑‍🍳

Most importantly, CUDDLING. Oh, how much Josuke loves to be intimate with you while watching TV before lights out. He craves physical touch, so expect to be in his arms all night.

Does he see having a future with you? Where would your relationship take y'all?

I can see Josuke being so head over heels for you. I mean, you're his first ever serious relationship. The boy is only 16. Only time would tell what could happen as the years go on.

Despite being very popular at school, he's sticking to the loyal code. As if Josuke wasn't already overwhelmed by the girls huddling around him beforehand, now he's confident to shoo them away and show you off. Intentional or not.

It would be nice to celebrate anniversaries. Josuke has always been infatuated on surprising you on the day with gifts! Maybe not expensive ass gifts, but possible handmade that he did with his mom 🥰 or jewelry that he can afford (if he can learn how to save up 🙄)

His mother hounds Josuke about his relationship, but not in a bad way. Tomoko wants the best for his son (and lowkey doesn't want him to end up like Joseph), so she's heavily involved in what you two do. Sure, it's very annoying, but Josuke knows his mother doesn't mean any harm.

Josuke can see himself years down the line having a family with you. He's really that lovestruck and delulu, so you have to remind him that you guys are only teens and don't know what life has for the both of y'all at the end of the tunnel.

Josuke just really loves you <3

[livindeadgirlgrav]

can you plz write headcannons or a story about female reader picking up nubbins sawyer while he’s hitchhiking, one thing leads to another, and she’s riding him to death (not literally teehee) in the back of her van🖤? maybe a bit of dom reader too? thank you so much🖤🖤

Yessss! Of course! Thank you so much for the request! I can totally write a headcanon also if you like! I love my little stories lol

Pairing: Nubbins Sawyer x Dom fem reader

Warning: NSFW!! Very nsfw, mention of drugs, violence, etc

Ps: Not 100% proof read it’s 3am lol it’s possible I overlooked something

You were a lost soul according to your parents, but in your mind all you wanted was to be free. A lot of things gave you that feeling of freedom- music, the open road, and a couple psychedelic drugs here and there. Having all three at your disposal you felt pretty free today. Driving your 72' Ford van you jammed all the way down the road. You hummed at the silk like feeling of the wind running through your fingers as you held your hand out the window. You smiled to yourself when you saw a hitchhiker on the side of the road. Of course you pulled over for them. First off it was way to hot to be walking I mean you were practically naked in your mothers eyes. And secondly he was pretty cute and you didn't have anything to do all day besides seeking that sweet freedom.

Once you came to a stop the strange looking man quickly got in the car. "Hey man? You alright? Its super hot out today. Suppose to be the hottest day of the year." You stated trying to make small talk. The man now in your passenger seat smiled. "Where you heading too hm?" You smiled at him as you started to drive away occasionally looking at him. "South" You nodded. "Same!" You giggled. "So how did you get out here?" You asked softly. "I was at the slaughter house, my brother work there. My grandfather too! My family always been in meat." He chuckled a little liking the attention he was getting from you. "Oh cool, my daddy was in it for a bit too but got a better job as I grew up. I never liked it, it made me sad seeing the poor babies." The man chuckled. "Its good food though, see they make head cheese. T-they take the head and boil it expect for the tongue and they scrap all the flesh away from the bone. They use everything, they don't throw nothin away!" Hearing the man ramble on you thought it was a bit gross but also kinda cute, he was so excited as if he hadn't had anyone to talk to in years. Like a little lost puppy. You giggled a bit, "Well I didn't know that." You smiled at him then looked back at the road. "Oh I love this song" You said turning up the radio, the wind blew into your window perfectly swaying your hair from side to side. Your attention was captured when you saw a flash coming from the man. Looking over you saw the man grinning as he looked at you then his camera. “Hey you took my picture!” You giggled. “You can drive to my house! It’s just down this road! A-and you can have dinner with me and my..” before he could finish you cut him off “Are you asking me out on a date?” You asked as you pulled over. The man looked at you confused. “Let me see.” You said as you scooted closer to him and took the photo out of his hand. “It’s not bad. You wanna take some more?” You smirked at the man.

Before you knew it the two of you were in the back of you 72' Ford van. You made the first move which wasn't unusual for you. At first you whispered sweet nothing into the nameless man's ear, then started nipping at his ear and the skin on his neck, earning soft moans from him. You noted at how edger the man was, noting how he trembled at your touch. Seeing how he wanted to touch you just not sure how. "You can touch me if you want, I don't bite..hard." You giggled then moaned softly as the man place his hand on your exposed thigh. "We can be slow if you like?" The man starred at you in awe and shook his head no. "Good boy." You quickly straddled his lap and began to kiss the man, kissing you back the man placed his hands on your waist. Grinding you kept kissing him till he pulled back a little to let a moan escape his lips. "It feels good doesn't it?" The man nodded as he laid back watching you grind against his lap. Smirking you kept going as you removed your shirt then your bra watching the mans face as he grinned ear to ear. You grabbed the mans chin softly and pulled him to you. Looking down at him you felt very dominate and free. The mans breath hence at the sudden touch, looking up at you he went to kiss you but you moved back slightly. "Tsk tsk so you wanna touch me?" You asked. "Y-yes." The man stuttered. "What do you say?" "Please?.." The man was very impatient as he was so needy, wanting a release. Grinning you placed the mans hands on your chest and he bucked his hips uncontrollably, making you chuckle. You grinned against the man making him shutter and moan. "You are so big." In a matter of seconds you both went after the same thing, his belt. You pushed his hands away and he grunted frustrated. Grinning you undid his belt and then his pants, going to undo yours he stopped you, pushing your hands away lightly. The man quickly unbuttoned your daisy dukes. Lifting yourself up the man pulled your shorts down. Before you even realized he was inside you and you rode him like a bull rider. Hearing his moans, grunts and whimpers. It was music to your ears and he was so unaware.

You both stayed in that metal tin till the sun went down, changing positions and occasionally fighting for dominance (when you won more than once) you moaned as the now naked man trusted into you and kissed on your neck. Grabbing his hair you moaned out, grinding as best you could against. The man moaned as while almost in perfect harmony with you. Before you knew it you both were finishing at the same time, it was something you never experienced before! A feeling washed over you that you swear was familiar but it definitely wasn’t.

Laying in the floor of the van you snuggled up with the man you come to learn to be Nubbins. Finding a old blanket under one of the seats you both snuggled underneath . Surrounded by polaroids of your naked body and of his you both fell asleep on the biggest high you could only imagine.

———————————————————————

Hey! I hope you enjoyed! Thank you so so so much from the request and thank you tons for reading!

[miley-citrus]

ꕤ Tell Me ꕤ

Pairing: Black Reader x Connie Springer

Word Count: 2.5k

CW(content warning): straight smut. (mention of drugs)

𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆

You loved him or well you believed you loved him. He was always on “business” trips to the point you never had time to love him. To show him how much you cared for him like no one ever cared for you.

I didn't know how it felt to be loved anymore. That's if Eren even loved you in the first place. That was until Connie came along. You loved him like a best friend. Or well you thought.

Eren was out of town for his weekly business trip. So you decided to hang out with his best friend Connie like you always did when he was away. Connie had some drops to do and said he could pick you up after he was done. But you insisted on coming with him anyways. Finishing freshening up you hear a car pull up outside your window. You look at your phone vibrate on the dresser.

Connie<33: outside mama 

You: comingg

You hurry and put your lip gloss on. Grabbing your phone and purse in the process. Making your way to the front door, closing it behind you. You start walking down the front porch stairs to his car. Standing outside the car door he greets you with a toothy smile. “Hi pretty” he cheeses. “Hi Con” you smile back. He immediately opens the door for you to get in. After closing your door he makes his way around to the driver's side. The smell of weed and cologne immediately hits your nose when you enter the car. 

“You ready to go pretty?” he says putting his seatbelt on. You turn to look at him making sure to check him out in the process. “I'm ready as long as I get to pick the music” you say. He laughs before answering “Yes of course you can pick the music. You have the best taste out of the two of us anyways” “Glad we established that” you say.

Grabbing his phone out of the cupholder you put in his password and click on your playlist. The first song to play is “Show me by Joey Bada$$”. Putting your freshly painted white toes on his dashboard, you sing along to the song. “Tell me how you loved before” Looking at you he smiles at you like you're the prettiest girl in the world. You look back at him and smile back with nothing but happiness in your eyes.

He loves seeing you smile since he's used to you being down all the time because his best friend-your boyfriend isn't showing you any attention. Finally arriving at the first “customer's” house he asks you to grab the duffel bag in the backseat. Taking your seatbelt off, you reach over to the backseat grabbing the bag. Connie getting a good look at your ass in the small denim shorts you were wearing in the process. 

Handing the bag to him he takes out a small clear bag filled with god knows what. Throwing the black duffel bag back in the backseat he tells you to stay in the car and then lock the door. “I'll be back just stay in the car” he says. You nod and do as he says.

He walks up to the house and knocks on the door. Some guy with long brown hair opens the door and lets him in. You decide to get on your phone until he comes out. Ten minutes pass by and walks out of the house dapping the guy up before walking back to the car. You unlock the door letting him back in. 

You ask him if you were going back to his place to watch a movie. “Yes if that's what you want mama” he smiles. Starting to drive to his place you turn the music back up. You scream along to the songs until you arrive at his house. He turns off the car and opens his door to run around and help you out of the car.

You look up at him and say “You know you dont have to keep opening and closing the door for me” He frowns before replying “Pretty girls deserve to be treated as princesses” You laugh and push him away walking up to the house.

He comes up behind you unlocking the door to let you inside. You immediately make your way to the kitchen opening the pantry door. You grab a bag of microwavable popcorn and put it in the microwave. “CONNIE” you yell. “Yes y/n” he replies

“Can you pick a movie to watch please” He stayed silent for a minute until he thought of one. “Transformers Revenge of the Fallen” You smile “Yea hoe I put you onto Transformers foreal” He laughs before replying “Watch your mouth..but yes you put me on y/n.” 

After getting the popcorn out of the microwave and grabbing some drinks. You both walk to go sit on the couch. Grabbing the remote he starts the movie. You get comfortable with your snack and recline with your legs laying over Connie.

He lays his arms on your legs. After a couple of minutes into the movie, he starts rubbing up and down your thighs. You dont think much of it because you're so into the movie. That's until he starts to rub higher close to the top of your shorts. Your breathing starts to speed up. “C-Connie” you whisper. “Yes pretty” he turns to you.

“You know we shouldn't be doing this right now. Eren is your best friend and my boyfriend” you mumble. “My “best friend” treats you like shit. Just let me show you how you're supposed to be treated.” You look down and fumble with your fingers until he lifts up your head with his finger.

“Please pretty?” he sighs. You give in with a small head nod. He continues rubbing up your thighs until he gets to your pussy. He rubs you through the outside of your shorts stimulating your clit. Feeling the pool of wetness start to form in your underwear you start to squirm around. 

Removing his hands away from your clit he looks up at you for permission to take off your shorts. You nod. Sliding the shorts he starts to trace the curves on your body. You move your legs off of him and crawl onto his lap. Taking his face into your hands you look him in the eyes.

“I’ve been waiting forever to be in this moment with you” he speaks. “So have I” you whisper. Moving your face closer to his your lips graze over his. This goes on for a while until he can't take it anymore. Crashing his lips upon yours his tongue made his way through your parted lips.

Gliding his hands from your hips he snakes his hands up to your throat. Lightly grasping it but enough to restrict some of your airflow. Continuing this heated kiss your body starts reacting to what's going on. Grinding your hips on his crotch you feel a bulge start to form under you. “fuck” he groans under his breath.

“You must've really been waiting for this the way your grinding against me” he speaks. You dont answer, mind to fogged up by the stimulation his dick is giving your clit through your thin panties. “Hm pretty? Answer me” he thrusts his hips up hitting a spot that makes you gasp. “F-fuck yes Connie” you cry.

Liking your reply he smiles and then begins kissing down your neck. Fixed on leaving noticeable marks for people to say. One of those people is Eren for sure. He didn't care how pissed Eren would get if he saw these marks. He wanted to show him that he could treat Y/n much better than he ever could.

Creeping his hand up to your chest he plays with your nipple through the thin skimpy fabric you call a shirt. Feeling you had no bra on he drops his head to your boobs. Wrapping his lips around your nipple he flicks it with his tongue. “ngh” you moan. A wet patch formed on his pants from all of the grinding you were doing. You were getting sick of the teasing. “Connie stop teasing me and just fuck me already. Please” you begged. 

Sympathizing for you he quickly picks you up and makes his way to his bedroom. Not missing a chance to strike your ass. “Ow,” you cry. Laying you on the bed he throws his wife beater off slinging it somewhere across the room. You begin taking off the rest of your clothes as he does the same. Catching a glimpse of his dick in the lowly dim room you start rubbing your legs together.

You thought he was big but not…this big.

Missing the touches he burned into your skin you pull him onto the bed. Opening your legs you allow him in between them. He lays in between your legs snaking his hand back to your aching cunt. You and him could both feel the slick forming around his fingers.

Lifting himself back up you could feel his mushroom tip press against your hole. Your wetness coating his dick in self-made lubricant. All you could think about right now was if he was going to fit or not. Eren had a good size just like Connie but he was much thicker. Girthy.  

He could feel your body tense up. “Relax mama, just let me take care of you” he speaks. You silently nod and relax your body as much as you could. Believing you were ready he pushed slowly inside you. “O-oh f-fuck” you moan. It was like the air had been knocked out of you. This wasn't your first time but it sure as hell felt like it.

You felt so full it was making your head foggy. He let you take a breath and get used to it before you told him it was okay to move. “You c-can move Connie” you breathe. Slowly rocking into you the pain starts to subdue. “F-faster” you say. Picking up the pace every quick snap of his hips has you clenching painfully around his dick. 

“Damn pretty, you get so tight for me” he groans. Wrapping your legs around his back to feel his thrusts get deeper. He lays a hand on your lower tummy and asks “You see how good I'm filling you up right now”

Tired of you not answering when he asks the first time he grips your neck to move your face closer to his. Still not missing a beat in thrusting up into your cunt. “Answer me when I'm talking to you mama” he demands. You immediately answer back not being able to take his hard thrusts. “Y-yes yes s-so good Con” you wail. 

Letting the grip on your neck go he lets you fall back down on the sheets. Lifting your legs up by your ears he thrusts even deeper into your cunt. It honestly seemed impossible for him to get even deeper than he was. “Oh.my.god. C-con” Your body really couldn't take it anymore. Your legs were shaking uncontrollably above your head.

Moving your hand towards his pelvis you try to push him away from you to stop his hard thrusts. “C-cant con. C-cant take a-anymore” you beg. He knew you could take it that's why he didn't care what you were crying about. He was determined to have you cream around his dick. 

“You can take it pretty. I know you can so move your hand.” he groans. You weren't listening to him at all. You were still scratching at his pelvis. “Y/n. Move your fucking hand before I move it for you.” Your mind was so mixed up at the moment. You didn't care what happened if you didn't move your hand. Grabbing your hand he moves it to the side. He slips out of your cunt flipping you onto your hands and knees. “Arch.” he says.

Oh, he was pissed and you didn't want to piss him off even more so you do as he says and arch. Feeling up on your ass he spreads you open trying to see the slick running out of your cunt. “You have the prettiest pussy you know that mama” he speaks. You groan trying to close your legs embarrassed about being so exposed. 

The cold draft in the room had your pussy clenching on nothing but air. “You told me you can't take it but your pussy is telling me something different” he smirks. Rubbing his tip up and down your slit he slips back inside of you. Both of you gasping at the feeling.

He immediately starts the same pace again. All that can be heard in the room is you and his groans and sounds of you and his mixed cum. “So fucking good” Connie groaned. You felt yourself starting to get close. You started matching his thrusts, clapping your ass against his thighs. 

Lifting your body up to his chest by the back of your neck he leans down to whisper in your ear. “Tell me how good I'm making you feel right now pretty” “s-so good Con” you gasp. “Could Eren fuck you this good? Make you cream around his dick like this? hm?” Connie asks. “N-No Connie” you reply. Delighted with your reply he lets your neck go. Falling back onto his soft cologned-filled sheets you continue clawing at them. Feeling you getting so close he snacks a hand over to your clit. Rubbing the nub in quick circles. 

This newly added feeling has you crying into the sheets. Juices dripped onto his palm and sheets. “ Come on pretty girl. Come around my dick” Speeding up the pace of his thrusts and clit has you and him both twitching. Groaning into the sheets you gasp “I’m cumming”

A couple more thrusts pressures you into making a mess on his dick and his sheets. “O-oh f-fuck con” “dont hold back pretty. Let it all out ” he says. That's exactly what you do. You wet up all of his abdomen with your juices. After tightening even harder around him it causes him to spill his seed inside you. 

Giving you a couple more thrusts to ride out your high he pulls out of you. Your body immediately collapses onto the sheets. At this time you're just trying to catch your breath and think about what just happened. Connie gets up from the bed and quickly runs to the bathroom to get a warm washcloth to clean you up. Coming back to the bedroom he gently cleans you up trying his best not to make you uncomfortable. Your body is still shaking and twitching some but he can see you're thinking about something.

After cleaning both you and him up. He gets a blanket to cover you both up. “Just rest pretty, we can think and talk about what just happened in the morning. Ok?” he speaks. You reply with a small yes and snuggle up against him trying to sleep. Before falling asleep Connie makes one more comment. 

“Erens going to murder the both of us and hide our bodies” 

𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆𖦆

[valley-of-headcanons]

If I can request, you did the way the bachelorettes react to ex-stardom. I enjoyed it so much and would love to see it for the bachelors too?

I love your writings ;u; ♡

bachelors reacting to your ex-stardom || headcanons

being in the limelight was fun for a while, but settling down is definitely what you needed. but how would your partner react to your past? part one here!

warnings: nothing that i can see! :)

requested by: anon! hii, thank you so much for the request! this topic is pretty interesting, and i really enjoyed writing for everyone! be sure to check out part one, it adds a little more context and i think it's super duper cool and you're definitely missing out. anyway! hope you enjoy :)

alex

• You and Alex were on the beach, resting after tossing around the Gridball. He got on the topic of his dream of playing Gridball professionally, and how although he wanted to make it big and turn his passion into a profession, he wouldn't know what to do with himself. He's been such a shut-in these last few years, only really hanging out with you and his grandparents. The fame sounds so scary. But ... you knew that all too well. He didn't know that, though. Maybe it was time.

• You slowly told Alex that you knew a lot about being famous, before explaining who you were. “Wait- what?! Why didn't you tell me sooner?! I love your music! Genuinely, like I listen to it all the time ... I know it's not really the manliest choice and it's my guilty pleasure- not to say men shouldn't listen to your music! Oh my yoba- sorry- ... I love your music. That's what I'm trying to say. It's really really good.”

• As you explained why you left the limelight, Alex nodded understandingly. “Yeah, Gridball will always be a dream of mine, but the people I'd be around are probably not good. Maybe staying in the town isn't such a bad idea, huh? I don't think anyone could really beat hangin' with you, grandma, and grandpa.”

• Alex soon opened up about which of your songs was his favorite, and asked in depth about them. There were some that really spoke to him emotionally, and he had a really bad time dealing with that sort of stuff. The fact that you created something he relates to makes him happier than ever! He scored pretty good, if he says so himself.

• Regardless of your old fame, he's still deeply in love with you. He admires your talent, but that doesn't overshadow how you've helped him in his life since you've actually been in it. He will still listen to your music, but maybe a little more publicly. He wouldn't tell anyone unless you said it was okay, but he'd totally be bragging about you if he were allowed.

elliott

• Elliott was not having a great writing session. He invited you over, incredibly stumped with his latest novel. He was bouncing ideas off of you left and right, but nothing would stick! You mentioned that music could be an inspiration, and it was like a lightbulb smacked him in the forehead. He raced over to his stereo and turned on the radio. A cheese-y pop tune ... YOUR cheese-y pop tune. He was embarrassed over the pop playing and immediately turned it, but he did notice your expression and inquired.

• You explained that the song on the radio was a song that you wrote and sang yourself. He was startled at first. “I didn't know we had such a big star in our midst! Are those your lyrics as well? I didn't pin you as such a wonderful writer, but I am so grateful! Someone that shares my writing prowess! I knew some invisible string brought us together!”

• As you continue to explain your past and why you came out to Pelican Town, Elliott nods along, hearing your story. “I didn't realize how similar we are. I understand wanting to get away from it all, that's why I'm out here as well. I suppose you came here to get away from your work, and I came to get closer to it. How awfully poetic that is, don't you think?”

• He asked a lot of questions, really diving deep into your mind. Of course, he only asked if you were comfortable with it. He loved analyzing people's minds, especially if they were different from his own. He may or may not use some of these aspects of your life in his new novel. With your permission, of course. You've always been his biggest muse.

• Elliott is invested in your life, like any good partner should, and admires your creative talent. This only heightens his view of you, as you are an artist, just like him. Despite the different mediums, you two share a lot in common. He would love you regardless of this aspect, but this only draws you two closer.

harvey

• Harvey was giving you a check-up, which was a bit unethical now that you were dating, but eh. He's the only doctor in the town and he's very worried about your health. He noticed that you mentioned a previous injury when checking your knee reflexes. This injury has occurred in a rehearsal for one of your tours. You didn't want to lie to your sweet boyfriend, so you had to admit the truth.

• As he wrote on his clipboard your reasoning, he stopped for a moment. “Tour? Popstar? Is this one of your sarcastic comments that I'm not getting? ... oh, really? You've never mentioned that part of your life before. Please, if you want to open up about it, show me some of your work once we get home. I hate to admit, but I'm fairly curious,” he said with a soft, caring smile.

• When you two get home after the checkup, he starts to cook dinner. “Please, keep me company while I cook. If you'd like to share some stories ... well, only if you're comfortable with it, I know that you got away from fame for a reason, but ... I want to know that part of your life, just like I know this one. Indulge me, if you would, my love.”

• He tries his best to support this part of your life, even if he wasn't involved. He ends up purchasing a lot of your old music and keeping a collection, showing it as a sign of affection. He listens to it while he does household chores, humming along to your songs happily while you're away.

• Harvey didn't mind this aspect of your life. It was another thing that made you the person he loves. He listens to everything you say and pays attention, specifically to the parts of fame you enjoyed and didn't enjoy. He only asked about the stuff you liked, and allowed you to open up about the hard times on your own, when you were ready. He was incredibly careful about the whole thing, and wouldn't dare make you uncomfortable.

sam

• As you and Sam were relaxing in his room one day, he was fiddling with his guitar. He seemed super stumped, strumming random chords to try and make some sense. Nothing was working ... he eventually showed you something that sounds sort of functional? But this rhythm was VERY similar to a song you put out a long time ago. You let out a soft giggle, which left Sam confused. You had to explain now.

• You drop the fact that you were a popstar in a nonchalant manner, trying to make it not a huge deal. But it's Sam. Of course it's a big deal. “No. Fucking. WAY! You're kidding, you've gotta be fucking with me! And you didn't tell me?! For SHAME! As punishment, you've gotta tell me all about it and I will refuse to change the topic. Now SPILL!”

• You explained who you are and why you left everything behind, which Sam thought about for a moment. “Wow ... I never really bought about fame that way. That must've been a lot, and I really do get why you came all the way down here. I'm just glad you're here now, y'know? ... but if you do end up getting the itch to create some music again, with no strings attached to fame, I'm always here. I'd love to create somethin' sick with you.”

• Sam always asked questions about the parts of fame he didn't know much about. Did you go to any parties? Was this person actually chill or were they a dick? He was so curious and asked probably the weirdest questions imaginable, but they were refreshing. And if you weren't the first person Sam showed his music to before, you were now. He always asked for your approval, and asked how to improve. It was extremely sweet.

• Even though he was excited about everything you had presented to him, he tried his best to be respectful. If you asked him to stop, he would with a nod and a quick apology, giving you a small kiss before putting the topic to bed. He still loved you for you! This aspect about you is just so cool and interesting to him. He adores you regardless, and wouldn't trade the current version of you for anyone else.

sebastian

• Sebastian had just finished working for the day and needed to relax. He flopped down on his couch and pressed the button on his radio. The pop station came on, and he was about to turn it before you walked in. You were shocked to hear your own song playing, staring at him with wide eyes. He makes some sarcastic comments about how this is actually his music taste and you just don't understand him. He doesn't understand why you're so shocked, though.

• As you slowly drop the bomb, he lets out a little chuckle. “Hah. Funny. You can drop the act, I can tell you're fuckin' with me ... are you really a world renowned superstar with several albums with hundreds of chart toppers? Like I believe that! Why the hell would you choose Pelican Town of all places to live, huh? This is the type of town you need to run away from.”

• You eventually have to explain why you left, why that lifestyle really wasn't you. He's actually at a loss for words for a moment, before nodding. “I didn't expect that out of you, you really are full of surprises. Tell me more, if you wanna. I'd be willing to listen. If you don't wanna talk about all that shit though, it's fine. Whatever you wanna do,” he said with a welcoming smile.

• Your music was FAR from what Sebastian listened to commonly. His Radiohead collection can attest for that. But ... he decided to take a listen to your music. He's very picky usually, so this is a pretty good feat. He actually kind of enjoyed it, for once. Maybe you're leading him down the path of liking something that's not edgy. Hmm. That's nice.

• Sebastian found this part of you incredibly interesting, but he didn't ask many questions. If you wanted him to know, he would, and he respected that. He loves hearing you talk about anything that you're passionate about, or just hearing you talk in general. It's arguably one of his favorite past times.

shane

• You and Shane were sitting by the pier one night. This was Shane's safe spot, attempting not to start drinking again. You two spent several afternoons sitting under the glow of the stars with an old cassette player and some of Shane's favorite songs. One of these nights, he mentioned that his childhood dream was to be an actor, and how weird fame seemed. He would hate being famous ... and you did too. This would be a perfect time to drop this bomb.

• You mentioned your past to Shane, but he brushed it off. “Uh huh. And I'm actually a famous bowler but I fucked up my arm and now I'm destined to live the rest of my life in this little shit hole. Oh, my poor dreams. How sad,” he said, his dry humor biting with sarcasm. He noticed your facial expressions ... they weren't sarcastic. “... I'm sober right? You didn't spike my drink or somethin' and you're tryin' to fuck with me ... huh. Now that's a topic.”

• You explained everything, mainly about why you came back here. You figured Shane wouldn't really know much about who you were, that's not his type of music anyway. “Huh. Nice. I figured you were just some corporate big league who got tired of the white walls. A lot of things make a lot more sense, I guess. You're a lot more talented than I thought ... sorry, that was mean- let me rephrase ... you are talented. I really am tryin' to get better about that ...”

• Shane didn't ask much about it further, but would listen if you brought it up again. He ended up stumbling across your work ... it was way better than he imagined. Maybe because it was you. It was a source of comfort to him, and he often listened to your beautiful voice when he was in a dark time. It helped him through a lot.

• He didn't mind your past, you had a lot less skeletons in your closet than he did. He liked hearing your voice, so it was a win-win. He got this down-to-Earth side of you that he enjoys being around, but he can also listen to his star-studded partner whenever he wants. He wouldn't tell you that, though. That's his little secret.

[bucket-fucker]

So you know how you do all the statue puzzles at the Lighthouse and you open up the tunnel to Solas's music room in the library? The room has the harpsichord in the center with a codex on top of it, the frescoes on the wall, and little else, but I decided to put the photo mode camera into position to see what Solas would be seeing if he sat at the harpsichord and this man continues to depress me.

Tell me this man did not sit at this harpsichord in his quiet time, painstakingly writing a song by candlelight that my obsessed ass of course interprets as being about his relationship with the Inquisitor (though obviously it could be interpreted to be about Mythal or spirits or something if you didn't romance him), drinking his bottle of wine, and sitting so that he can view his frescoes from his days with the Inquisition.

And then, if you turn around, you can see that his fresco with the dragon is at his back, where he can't see it.

Also worth mentioning is the shattered orb in the corner next to a tarot deck.

But the most important thing in this room that I HAVE QUESTIONS about is

why the fuck does Solas need this much cheese

[jjungkookislife]

a prompt that’s been on my mind recently:

oc and jk at a halloween party, and he’s doing everything to make her jealous to see if she shares the same feelings.. but it backfires because she finds it a little childish and they have a real conversation about their feelings 😭

oooh this is such a good one, anon! thank you :)

When You're Done

pairing: jungkook x reader

warnings: jealousy, alcohol use/mention, food mention

They did the Monster Mash...

You giggled as one of your favorite songs filled your best friend's home. Hoseok was ever the social butterfly as he made the rounds as host.

He had greeted you briefly before disappearing into the crowd of strangers. Well, most of them were strangers, a few of your friends were scattered about. You lingered by the appetizers, sneaking cheddar cheese bites and crackers. Your glass of wine had been refilled twice, but it did nothing to take your mind off the itchiness of your skirt.

"Jung Hoseok!" You grit your teeth as you spot Jungkook across the room in a costume that compliments yours. You had the bright idea to come as Wanda from the Fairy Odd Parents, and there stood Jungkook as Cosmo, green hair and all.

You turn on your heel, using the crowd to your advantage, pushing past the spiderwebs, and the streamers.

"Whoa!" What's got you in such a hurry? Should have come as Sonic instead," Jimin giggles, while you roll your eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me Jungkook would be here?" You sigh.

"Because I was in charge of the food, not the guests?" Jimin raises a thick brow. "I thought you liked him?"

"Shhh!" you smack his arm repeatedly until he grabs your hand, licks it, and sets it down. "EWWW!"

"That's what you get! You almost got crumbs on my flowy shirt," He snarks.

"You look like a pirate."

"You look like the Tooth Fairy." He retorts. He holds his hand up before you can insult him again. "Just ignore him, or flirt with him, or fuck him. I don't know at this point. Go do shots with Jin and Tae."

"I loathe you," you grumble as you walk past him.

"Love you too, cutie!" Jimin calls out as you flip him off.

You find Seokjin in his lifeguard costume and Taehyung in his Monopoly Man costume. He chats with a group of girls, each fawning over him.

"Hey,!" Seokjin waves as he has you join him on the bench. He has a cup in his hand as he looks at the fire burning before him. "Heard Jungkook's here as Cosmo. How does that make you feel?"

"Seokjin, don't psychoanalyze me. It's bad enough you work with my mom," you huff. Seokjin cackles as he drapes his arm around your shoulders.

"She just wants you to be happy. Maybe with a grandchild or two. Human or feline."

"Jin!" you huff as you head back to the party. You spot Namjoon in his mummy costume and join him on the dance floor.

You ignore the heat of a familiar stare. You weren't opposed to Jungkook speaking to you. You were friends... sort of. He had been acting odd as of late. It seemed like he had someone hanging off his arm every time you were around. Was he trying to make you jealous?

Hoseok told you Jungkook liked you a few weeks back, which excited you because you had crushed on him for six months since he joined your friend group through Namjoon. The two were coworkers at his gaming company but now you dreaded being around Jungkook.

Jungkook holds the waist of the person he's with. He laughs at something they say but his eyes are on you as you dance to the song. You ignore him, dancing with Namjoon until Yoongi comes to join, then the three of you are jumping around and laughing.

"Let's go play a game!" Yoongi shouts over the music, you nod as you follow him and Namjoon off the dance floor.

Jungkook follows you with whoever he's selected for the night.

You take a seat beside Namjoon, joined by Jimin and Seokjin. As Yoongi explains the rules, Seokjin and Jimin pull you into their selfies, making you laugh when they kiss your cheek. When Yoongi rolls his eyes at you , you sit up straight, pouting as you apologize.

Jungkook's brows furrow as he stares at you with Jimin draped over one side and Seokjin on the other. He moves his hand onto the person beside him, joining their fingers. He knew it was wrong of him to use this person to get to you but he wanted to make you jealous. He wanted you to feel like he did.

You smile briefly at Jungkook, waving before turning your attention to Yoongi.

"All right, pick a partner," Yoongi instructs, and Jimin scoops you up in his lap, making you laugh.

"I guess I'm taken," you announce.

Jungkook growls as he scoops the person he brought. He watches you, but you say nothing as you stare at him. You wouldn't fall for his game, not now. Though your heart hated to see him so close to someone else. He had to know about your crush. It wasn't like Hoseok to keep quiet, not when he could play matchmaker among his friends.

Was Jungkook doing this on purpose? To hurt you?

You shake your head, paying attention to Jimin as he loops your arms together.

Jungkook gets close to the person beside him, and he realizes they're dressed as a doctor or something. He's not quite sure nor does he care as he kisses their cheek.

Your smile sours as you watch Jungkook. Yoongi sends you to the party to collect the items assigned to your group. You eagerly run off, wanting to be as far away from jungkook as possible.

"Jungkook, you're not supposed to follow me," you huff when he appears beside you at the snack table.

"Who says I'm following you?" he asks as he grabs a drink. You sigh but continue on your way. You had to find someone dressed as Batman.

"Where are you going?" Jungkook asks as he steps beside you.

"Away from you. Where's your Doctor anyway? The two of you seemed pretty close," You remark as you head down a hallway that leads to the kitchen.

"You noticed?" Jungkook's eyes widen.

"Yes, why are you trying to make me jealous? It's childish as hell!" You exclaim as you grab a water bottle from the fridge.

Jungkook frowns. "Who says I'm trying to make you jealous?"

"Jungkook," you sigh heavily. "Hoseok has to have mentioned my crush on you. I don't know why you're messing with me like this. It's cruel to make fun of me."

"I'm not making fun of you!" Jungkook shouts and you stare at him pointedly.

"Then why are you acting like that with your Doctor? You keep appearing everywhere I'm at to hold their hand and kiss their cheek. If you don't like me, fine. Just don't be an asshole about it."

"Fuck, I'm an idiot," Jungkook huffs. "I wanted to make you jealous, okay?"

"Why?"

"Because I like you, and it seemed like you never acknowledged me unless someone was beside me."

"You are an idiot," you giggle.

"HEY!"

"I just mean, if you'd look past your childish games, you'd realize I like you. I have for months now," you shake your head.

"Really?"

"Really," you nod as you take his hands in yours. Jungkook kisses your cheek, giggling when you hide your face in his chest.

"Now, can we stop playing these stupid games?" You ask as you wrap your arms around his waist.

"Yes," he answers. "You're the only one I want."

[weemswife]

Work exhaustion

Larissa Weems x Female reader

Summary: Reader works as a part-time assistant for a fashion editor, so sometimes she can have very long and exhausting days at photoshoots, and this day was one of them.

Author's note: so yeah this is my first ever fanfic that i have written so please be kind lol, and this fic is maybe more like ‘day in my life’ kind of fic and is more focused on the reader than Larissa. And the fic is actually briefly based on my recent workday but i of course changed many things. Btw i would love to know your thoughts on this fic, and please remember that english is NOT my first language. And this is probably the messiest fanfic ever lmao.

Warnings: a brief mention of sexual content, exhaustion, a bit of strong language, bad english i think that's it but please let me know if you think other ways. ty :)

Word count: 2357

*alarm sound goes on*

“Goddamnit” you mumbled quickly turning off the alarm so you wouldn't wake the sleeping woman next to you.

you checked the time on your phone and it was 6:40am. You weren't a morning person at all so it took all of you not to go back to sleep because you knew how long your day was going to be.

You quietly got up from the bed the two of you shared, you didn't want to wake up Larissa because the school hasn't started yet so she could sleep a bit longer than normally even though she would be doing work things on her computer during the day, she didn't have to wake up at 5am like she normally did. You walked to the bathroom that was connected to your large bedroom and did your morning routines, after that you quietly gathered all the things you needed from the bedroom and went to the kitchen/livingroom to change your clothes that you already chose last night, (the outfit was just a dark blue hoodie and jeans) after changing your clothes you started making your breakfast which was just a piece of bread with cheese and cucumber slices on it and of course you had your morning coffee. 

After breakfast you took your favourite smoothie from the fridge and putted it in your bag because you knew that you needed something to drink during the day, you checked the time on your phone and it was 7:18am, two minutes before you had to leave, so you quickly checked that you got everything and putted your leather jacket and shoes on and then you opened the door of your so called apartment and left. 

Walking through the empty hallways of the Nevermore Academy you took your headphones from the front pocket of your hoodie and putted them on your ears, after that you opened the Spotify app on your phone and pressed play on the ‘This is Fleetwood Mac’ playlist that you listened all the time and the first song that started playing was one of your favourites songs that Larissa actually introduced to you and it was song called ‘Say you will’.

When you finally got out of the school you checked the time and it was 7:22am, you had 13 minutes before your bus to the city you were today going would stop on your closest bus-station, so you started walking toward the bus-station on your normal walking pace which some people wouldn't consider as a normal walking because you were actually a very fast walker, you had always been that way and you believe that you got it from your dad because he was also a very fast walker and of course one reason could be that you were together with Larissa because literally her one step was same as normal person taking two steps. And in your opinion you didn't have problems with keeping up on Larissa’s walking pace when the two of you were walking in the forest or in just around Jericho.

When you got to the bus-station you checked the time on your phone and it was 7:31am so you still had four minutes left before your bus would be there. 

The 4 minutes passed and you finally got on the bus where you would be sitting the next 40 minutes. The only thing that kept you together during the bus trip was music, it was probably one of the most important things in your life and as cliche as it was you believed that you couldn't seriously live without it.  

The 40 minutes passed very quickly and you realised that your stop would be next. You waited for a moment before the bus stopped and you got off. You then started walking to a studio where you would start your day with the photographer, your boss and the model. You were supposed to be at the studio at 8:30am but when you arrived in front of the building you checked the time on your phone and it was 8:22am, you were early as always. Then you realised that the door that led into the studio was slightly open and you were glad about it, because if the door was closed you would have call your boss so she could open it and you really didn't like calling to her so now that you got the change you opened the door a bit more so you could get in and closed it behind your back.

From inside the studio was quiet so you thought that there was no one except you so when you walked a bit forward into the studio you almost freaked out when all of sudden you saw Annie. “Hi” said she “hi, what are you doing here?” you asked “oh well i’ll be the assistant for the photographer today.” she answered. “Okay well i'm happy that you’re here ” you said, you liked Annie even though this  was the second time you actually met her, but she was much more energetic and helpful than you were. You didn't have anything to do so you just chatted a moment with her before she got a text message that she would have to go to the grocery store to get breakfast for your crew.

After a couple of hours everything was ready in the studio and you left to the location with the crew, you literally needed two cars because there was so much stuff that the photographer needed and also the clothes took a lot of space.

After you arrived at a small building that was in the area where the photo shooting would happen you were told that you would be staying the whole time in the building guarding the clothes etc.

So you just sat there and after everytime the shot for one look was done you of course helped the model change, there were 8 different outfits that would be photographed. Of course after your boss realised that you were just chilling during the shoots she made you do a million different kind of things that you had literally never done before.

The photo shoot took only 4 hours and when you were done you had to pack everything and carry all the bags to the car that would take them back to the studio. After everybody was ready you just left, it took a while to get to the studio but when you finally got there you started packing everything away with Annie.

After spending two hours in the studio packing all the clothes, shoes and bags with Annie you were finally free to go and you were exhausted. You thought that it was actually almost funny how tired you were, because all you did during the day was sitting around and help the model get out of the clothes and change in new ones, maybe it was the packing or the fact you slept only 5 hours during last night, or the lack of food or the fact you were working almost 10 hours straight, but honestly it didn't matter. When you left the studio and started walking towards the bus-station with Annie you took your phone from the back pocket of your jeans and texted Larissa:

“I’ll be home in one hour and i haven't eaten much today…”

You checked the time and it was almost 6pm so Larissa should be done with her work for the day, so you waited a few moments when you saw that she had seen your messages and then she started writing you back.

“Oh sweetheart, that doesn't sound good, i’ll make you something to eat when you get home:).”

You just replied with “<3”. And then you put your phone back in your pocket. 

You realised that you were already at the bus-station so you waited with Annie for your buses to come, her bus came first so you said goodbyes and then she went in and the bus left. You checked the time on your phone and it was 6:01pm three minutes before your bus comes. So you took your headphones from your bag and put them on your ears and started listening to Fleetwood Mac again.

3 minutes pass and you are already in the bus where you will sit for the next 40 minutes again..

The 40 minutes pass surprisingly quickly when you try your best not to fall asleep and you realise that your stop is next so you get out of your seat and wait for the bus to stop and you get out. After getting out your tired mind realised that you have to walk to the school, you were still exhausted. Honestly you wished that you didn't have to take another step today, but you really didn't have choices because it was too late to call Larissa to come and get you and also you didn’t want to bother her anyway. So you started walking the road that led to the school knowing that it would take much more time than it normally took. 

Almost 15 minutes later, almost at the school you tried your best to walk even a bit faster knowing that in just a moment you would be at home with Larissa. Opening the main door of the school you started walking towards your apartment door, when you came face to face with a large wooden door you unlocked it with your key and went in.

Inside the apartment Larissa was buzzing around your small kitchen while making food for you, but when she heard you opening the door she immediately turned to see you coming into the room. 

“Hi” you said with a small voice, you seriously didn't even have the energy to speak anymore.

“Hi” she answered while walking towards you she saw how exhausted you looked and when she was close enough to touch you she took you into her arms and hugged you.

She eventually let go and started walking back to the kitchen so she could finish the food.

“The food is almost ready dear, so please take your shoes and jacket off and go to sit on the sofa.”

You didn't even realise that you still had your shoes and jacket on so you took them off and walked slowly towards the sofa and tried your best to stay awake.

Meanwhile Larissa has finished the food she made which was chicken and rice because she knew you loved it. She then came towards you and sat next to you on the sofa while speaking quietly.

“The food is ready now sweetheart, you can eat it on the sofa but first you need to change into more comfortable clothing, i can go get the clothes for you but what do you want?” she almost whispered.

“Maybe an oversized t-shirt and my black pyjama pants would be nice” you answered.

“All right, i’ll be right back dear” she said while getting up from the sofa.

A couple of minutes passed and when she came back she saw you almost half asleep. 

You were almost falling asleep until you heard Larissa’s footsteps coming towards you. Now she knelt in front of you and said,

“I’ll help you to change your clothes now if you allow me?”

You just answered by nodding your head.

Then she took the hem of your shirt into her hands and started moving it upwards.

“Darling, could you please raise your hands for me so i can take this hoodie off?” she asked.

You did what you were told and lazily raised your hands so Larissa could get the hoodie off easier.

After she had almost completely undressed you and the only things you still had on were bra and underwear, Larissa watched you for a moment while sitting on the floor in front of you.

Usually this sight would turn her on in seconds but she knew that you could fall asleep in any minute so she gathered herself from the floor and started dressing you in her old oversized t-shirt that had a picture of Stevie Nicks on it and after putting on the shirt she helped you into the pyjama pants.

After that she went back to the kitchen to get you some food, she then returned to the sofa where you were sitting and handed you the plate.

You started slowly eating the food that Larissa had made for you, while she sat next to you and watched while you ate.

After finishing the food you thanked Larissa and leaned your head on her shoulder.

She didn't first even realise that you had fallen asleep until she started hearing that you breath steadied and when you didn't answer anything when she whispered into your ear.

Larissa let you sleep for a while before she slowly stood up and you still didn't wake up. She then gathered you into her arms and lifted you up from the sofa and carried you into your bedroom.

She put you down on the bed and went to the bedroom to get your hairbrush and a small tube of gel that you put on your face every night before going to bed.

After she finished doing your nighttime routines for you and you were still sleeping Larissa just moved you so your position would be more comfortable and then she covered most of your body with the blanket so you wouldn't feel cold during the night.

She then left the bedroom and went back to the kitchen/livingroom and made sure that all things were where they should be so that you wouldn't have to worry about that in the morning.

After cleaning Larissa returned to the bedroom and started doing her own nighttime routines, letting her hair down and brushing it, changing into something more comfortable, doing her skincare routines etc. 

After she was done with the nighttime routines Larissa climbed into the bed and carefully pulled your body close to hers so she could spoon you from behind, then she whispered “good night my love”

And closed her eyes.

[tokuvivor]

Due to circumstances beyond the control of any others, @violetganache42 and I are splitting duty on this week’s highlights post (Competition Night edition). She did it for the shorts and episodes, I’m doing it for An Extremely Goofy Movie.

So without further ado, here we go.

“Polar Trappers”:

We bring ‘em back alive

@puffyducks: bro where is pabo

Donald hunting a penguin, which is now illegal to do so

Not the kid!

The baby penguin’s tear becoming a massive snowball

“Need 4 Speed”:

QUACK PACK (Again!)

Disney Ducks meet The Fast and the Furious

@spamtoon: huey you guys aren't in phineas and ferb

Daisy appearance!

The idea of Comet Guy Night

@ducklooney and puffy going off about humans being in the Duckverse

Us calling Donald and the authorities to kill Rocky the Rocket Throttle

From Negaduck ass car to Ratcatcher

@writebackatya: "This is like the Family Guy of the Duckverse"

Ludwig appearance!

puffy: "where's dick dastardly"

Puffy, Missy, and I using 90s slang

Daisy seeing the triplets in the race:

RIP ethnically stereotyped racers

WriteBackAtYa: "DuckTales 2017 needed a car race episode"

Violet: "Would Huey and Launchpad be commentators?"

WriteBackAtYa: "Yes Always"

Violet: "SOLD!"

Ludwig's toy kangaroo winning the race

@tealottie: erection joke

“The Missing Links of Moorshire!”:

Webby giving Scrooge semi-permanent hearing loss

Launchpad: "This lake will be used for the swimming portion of the competition."

Huey: T_T

Violet: "Cue theme song!"

Missy betraying Della with Daisy

Tony the Tiger?!

The entire coin toss scene 🤣

Us praising Glomgold

Missy commenting how Scrooge and Glomgold can't tuck their tails for golfing

The audio glitching like CRAZY

Fluttershy and Bubbles the Kelpies

Webby: "Talking animals wearing clothes?! :D"

@fantasticenthusiasttale: "Webby…"

Violet, internally:

"Bologna. Trampoline."

THE MUSIC USED FOR THE MONTAGE!

Louie yoinking money out of Glomgold's sweater pocket

Emo Dewey

"You people are no fun."

Webby: "Not everything has to be a life lesson."

Violet:

Violet pretending to be turned to stone by the Medusa Mist (as I like to call it)

Launchpad ending the episode with a life lesson… before trying to devour golf balls

“Dog Show”:

puffy: "you know who else is an orphan"

Dreamy: "Everyone in this shit is an orphan"

The dog show people being dogs

Goofy literally begging

Pixar ball

Mickey unleashing his inner dog

An Extremely Goofy Movie

Calling out all the characters from the previous movie as they show up

The fact that Pete is celebrating his own son leaving💀

How is Goofy single?

Goofy having major rizz (this point comes up quite a bit during the movie, and for good reason)

Max’s character development from A Goofy Movie being undone

Sad Goofy☹️

HDL mention!

Bradley Uppercrust III

@kaitosduckmania: “god this shit is so pretentious LMAO”

Will: “I want this review on the back of the DVD”

Max/Roxanne vs. Max/Bradley on Tumblr

Beret Girl!

Puffy: “you know who ELSE is called tank”

Violet: “MY MOM”

Puffy: “they’re snapping at us…MENACINGLY”

Bradley having the same VA as Johnny Bravo (also, The Man with the Yellow Hat)

Max’s horrified face when he sees that he and his dad are in the same class

Bobby wearing pink panties/briefs

Hidden Mickey

Goofy’s mispronunciation of the word “trigonometry”

Puffy: “the WHAT decimal system”

Sylvia being adorable

Goofy does a Donald-esque voice

Kai: “WHAT THE FUCK GOOFY YOU CAN MAKE THAT VOICE?”

Will: “Max’s whole character is that he doesn’t want to be like Goofy but like he is so much like his father that he doesn’t even know it”

More cheese pull (pizza in the last movie, nachos in this one)

BONGO MUSIC

PJ has rizz, too

Goofy and Sylvia dancing to Shake Your Groove Thing

Papa Dog

Us dumping on the inherent cult-like nature of fraternities, sororities, and the National Honor Society

The German judge low-balling everyone

Dreamy: “Is this the olympics all again”

Puffy: “this is MY olympics”

Max shooting down Goofy in the worst way possible

Goofy’s weed/acid trip dream (plus the Goofy holler!)

More Goofy sadness

Meta humor about almost everyone wearing gloves

Missy betraying Daisy with Sylvia

CHEATING!!!!!

PJ flying off

Dreamy: “He went to visit Della”

“Mud! My only weakness!”

Will mentioning that the scene with the X crashing down was removed from the broadcast version of the movie after 9/11 (which we completely understand, because holy shit)

Also, sort of a Hindenburg reference

Goofy graduating! (And then telling Max he was getting a job at the school)

Sylvia having the same VA as Emma Glamour

Spam floating the idea of Max vs. Gosalyn for the X Games

Disco end credits!

Also, that was a goofy movie. Extremely, even.

[greymoonfeelings]

When in Doubt, Dance it Out

pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x fem! reader

summary: Work has been depleting all your energy, but Bradley knows just the thing to cheer you up.

word count: 655

I recommend listening to “My Girl” before or during reading to best imagine the scenario.

•••

Bradley has no idea what is going on with you tonight. When he arrived home, you only responded to his greeting with an incoherent mumble. To his knowledge, you have yet to eat dinner, but when he offered to order takeout you brushed him off.

Later in the night, you skip out on cuddling up with him to watch the newest episode of your favorite show (a ritual you never failed to partake in) and now he’s been home for five hours with barely so much as an acknowledgment.

The only indication as to what is occupying all of your attention is the loud groans and frustrated typing coming from your workspace. Bradley can tell that you’re exhausted, but he knows the one thing that never fails to pick you up.

While chipping away at your latest assignment, you hear music start to play from the bedroom. The song echoes down the hallway, loud enough to break your concentration.

“Would you mind turning that down?” No response.

“Would you mind turning that down?” No response.

Instead of getting up to confront your fiancé, you try your best to ignore the music. However, the beat slowly grows louder as the source approaches the living room. You recognize the tune and accompanying snapping.

“I’ve got so much honey the bees envy me. I’ve got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees.”

Bradley’s deep voice causes you to once again lose focus on the task at hand. You need to finish this presentation before your meeting tomorrow afternoon, but your fiancé’s antics were not making it easy. He knows how much you love to hear him sing, it practically turns you to jello, which is why it’s the last thing you need right now.

“Well, I guess you’d say, what can make me feel this way?”

“I wouldn’t say that because I know what you’re about to do.” You respond sardonically, still not looking away from your computer. Your lack of enthusiasm doesn’t deter Bradley though.

“My girl.” Your fiancé pops around your left side and then around your right as he sings the next “my girl”.

Bradley puts one hand on the back of your chair spinning you away from your desk so he can sing directly to you, “My girl. Talking ‘bout my girl.”

He continues serenading you, putting on a whole show in your living room. Bradley sure knew how to move to a beat. If you weren’t so entranced by his moves you may have questioned where he learned them.

When the next verse starts, Bradley's shoulders shimmy as he glides across the hardwood floor, offering his hand for you to take.

“I don’t need no money, fortune or fame.” Hesitantly you place your hand in his larger one allowing him to pull you up from your seat. “I’ve got all the riches, baby, one man can claim.” Your fiancé twirls you until your chest collides with his causing you both to burst out into laughter.

“You’re one hell of a charmer. Did anyone ever tell you that, Bradshaw?”

“It’s been mentioned once or twice.” His answer has you playfully rolling your eyes. “Will you take a break? I know you didn’t eat, sweetheart.”

“Well, I guess I can finish this tomorrow morning.” Bradley cheers in success. “But only if you make me some of that famous Bradshaw mac and cheese and feed it to me while we watch the new episode on HBO.”

“About that…” Your fiancé nervously smiles.

“You watched it without me? Bradley!”

He immediately throws his hands up in defense. “I asked you if you wanted me to wait. You just waved me off.”

“This is grounds for divorce!”

“We’re not even married yet!”

“Well, now it’s never gonna happen.”

“Aw, don’t say that, baby. You know you want to be stuck with me for the rest of your life.”

“I’m gonna be stuck on you like that damn mustache is stuck on your face.”

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

Re-Animated is finally out, so that means it's time for PART 2 BABY

EVERY SONG IN ZOMBIES: THE RE-ANIMATED SERIES + SHORTS SUMMED UP IN ONE SENTENCE:

Shorts:

Endless Summer: Zeddison fight existential dread once again, and this time it's their own fault!

Nobody's Better Than Bucky(Im just guessing the title here Idk): How the fUCK DID BUCKY MANAGE TO TAME A WHOLE ASS PLANT MONSTER IN LIKE 5 MINUTES GODDAMN-

What Do We Do Right Now: Genuinely the funniest fucking song in the entire franchise

I Still See You: Ha ha Willa sang a love song to a cricket everybody point and laugh!!!

Series:

My Year (the Re-Animated Remix): GOD I wish we got to see the full version animated...

Repeat: Why the fuck do you people want to redo your senior year of highschool!?!?!?

Zed's Plan: This has the EXACT same energy as the montage song from South Park lmfao

Zoda: Glad to see they're fully leaning into Zed's "clearly becoming class president will let me change the towns laws" bs from the 2nd movie, makes that whole thing feel slightly less stupid

A Zombie and Her Machine: Eliza why are you like this

It's Free Period: Interior crocadile alligator core

Underwater Airplane: It's just Wynter shouting random shit into a microphone Idk what to tell you

When Worlds Collide: I have no clue what the hell she's talking about but at least the song is catchy asf!

Be An Alpha: Now introducing; BUCKY AND WILLA'S MUSICAL ALPHA MALE PODCAST!!!!!!!

We're Bringin' It: Bucky why are you like this

You're Dae: It's me, Bucky, yeah(I'm incredible)

Welcome to Seabrook: Don't have much to say on this tbh it's just the opening number of a school musical, it's def dethroned I'm Winning as least memorable in the series no competition-

Shrimpossible: I didn't understand most of what he was saying but goddamn if Trevor Todjman didn't put his all into that preformance

Meant to Combine: Wyatt and Eliza you cheesy motherfuck- oh shit they're vegans they don't eat cheese nvm

Be Like Me: Basic ass montage song is basic

It's Okay: Men would rather create a giant mud monster, get eaten, and hallucinate their sister singing a song to them before going to therapy smh

I'm a Cat: RAZZMATAZZ MENTION!!!!!!!!

I'm a Box: Literally the best way they could've wrapped up that episode

Back 2 Back: I don't have anything to say about this one either tbh, but it's more memorable than the opening number to the musical!

Okay that's it. Expect a part 3 when the rest of season 1 comes out because there are supposed to be 34 fUCKING songs in this show and these are only 18 of them!?!?!?! Plus I have no idea when the rest of the season is coming out. So.

Also I'll make a Part 4 when the 4th movie comes out :)

Part 1

[ermesskiss]

a lil satosugu drabble

Student Satoru would dance like a drunk white girl listening to “Every Time We Touch.” 

He would convince Suguru to dance with him. The only possible way for this to happen is if they drink together. Suguru must be more than tipsy to dance carelessly with Satoru. Environment-wise, the club would be more the loudness of the music, other people dancing, and access to alcohol. 

Satoru’s face would be so red for two reasons. One, alcohol makes his face all red because he is sensitive, and two, Suguru dancing with him makes him feel all giddy, especially with lyrics like Bros cheesing so hard. 

Can't you feel my heartbeat fast? I want this to last

Need you by my side

Can't you hear my heartbeat so? I can't let you go

Want you in my life

'Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling

And every time we kiss, I swear I could fly

Then, mid-song, Satoru kisses Suguru and indulges in it until Satoru pulls away. The next day, they wake up and see each other, and Suguru is all nervous when he sees Satoru, not knowing if he’ll remember what happened. They exchange good mornings with each other, and Suguru asks him, “How was last night?” to see if he remembered the kiss, just for Satoru to say, “I don’t know. My head hurts. Never drinking again.” And he's relieved but a little sad, cause he's not going to mention the kiss unless Satoru did.

also, the fact that this song was released in August of '05, like omg please

anyways, silly little thought I had, a little ooc for them? not sure. what I thinking in my head did not come out the same way I wanted to when I typed this out lol, there is more i wanted to add on and elaborate but my brain is going to strain itself

[just-alittle-spooky]

LUCK OF THE IRISH

Pairing: Charlie Kelly x fem!reader Summary: Charlie decided to stay in Ireland with his father Shelly, and he happens to meet the cute new coffee shop waitress down the road from their house. Completely by chance, he wasn't stalking her or anything. Warnings: Not really anything, it's VERY tame. Side warning though, I'm not from Ireland but I do attempt to use some Irish slang so if I use it wrong I'm very sorry.

----------

Charlie didn't get out much. Back when he lived in Philly, it wasn't like he was a shut-in. But he had always tended to keep to himself and only interact with new people when absolutely necessary. His four best friends were generally the only people he'd talk to for weeks, sometimes months, not including the various innocent bystanders that would get wrapped up in their hair-brained schemes. The only woman he'd had strong feelings for since highschool didn't show him the time of day for decades, and once she did, he realized that they simply weren't meant to be. Every minute he spent in Philadelphia since then seemed to drone on and on. Like there was no purpose or meaning to life anymore. All the enthusiasm had drained out of him, Charlie had been drifting for so long, he wasn't sure when it had started.

Which was why the normally travel-shy janitor had jumped at the chance to get out of their usual routine once Ireland was on the table. He wanted to see the country he supposedly hailed from (if his last name were any indication), experience a new place, and give life another shot. It was only coincidence that he ended up finding his father, an old pen pal that he hadn't thought twice about in years. But as they began to reconnect—or rather, connect for the first time—he started to feel a passion that had left him long ago. It was startling when he realized that he wanted to stay, to leave behind his old life, old friends, old apartment, old city, hell, his whole home country. As the days went on in his new home, he found that those things were all beginning to be easily replaced. He found a new house in staying with his father, a new city in the quaint Irish countryside village, a new life as a cheese mongrel or whatever it was they were doing. And even the old love of his life slowly but surely slipped away, and was quickly being replaced by a new one.

Alright, maybe it was a little soon to say she was the love of his life. They'd only know each other a few weeks—well, he'd known her. Without her knowing at all—but that had never stopped him before.

Besides, who could blame him? She was everything Charlie had ever wanted in a girl. Sweet as honey, pretty as the morning dew, gentle as a doe, and did he mention how pretty she was? He'd never met eyes with her, but he was sure that it he did, they would sparkle at him like diamonds. From a distance, her hair looked soft and he could only bet that it smelled as sweet as the glimpses he'd get of her perfume on the few occasions she'd walk past him. Charlie had listened in on her conversations—it was what any good potential suitor would do—and her voice had this musical quality to it. It made him want to write her a million love songs to play along to her everyday conversation. In Charlie's eyes, this girl was absolutely perfect. And moreover, she was perfect for him.

But he couldn't escape the nagging voices in his head. The ones that belonged to his old friends, his old life. Dennis criticizing his every decision, moving in on the girl and capturing her away before Charlie could even introduce himself. Dee shrieking in his ears that no girl would ever want him the way he was. That he was dirty and gross and that he couldn't read, that anyone with half a brain would see what a mess he was and run in the opposite direction. Frank telling him he was better off alone, that he should just stay in the apartment with him and make Grilled Charlies all day long. And what stung the most, was the voice of The Waitress in his head. Every time she'd ever rejected him, every nasty word she'd ever spoken in his direction, all the times she tore him down and told him that there wasn't a chance in hell they'd ever be together. It was all just one great big reminder that he wasn't worth the trouble. That he should cut his losses and stick to staring at her when he was sure she wasn't looking. It had always worked for him, before. Usually. Sometimes. It had worked once or twice. Regardless, that was what he resolved to do.

Unfortunately, he didn't count on Shelly being so observant.

"Well, you've a glad eye for that one, haven't you?" the words were lighthearted, and accompanied by a gentle push on the shoulder.

"I don't have a glass eye," Charlie replied, voice steeped thick in confusion. Not uncommon for him.

"No, Charlie, a glad eye. It means you've got a crush," Shelly explained himself, giving his son a sly grin.

"What? No! No, I– I don't have like a..." he trailed off, losing his train of thought when the pretty girl appeared in his peripheral once more. Charlie and Shelly had been after a quick bite to eat that morning—one could only eat so much cheese in a day—and Charlie had innocently suggested this little coffee shop on the edge of town. It was close to their house and came, of course, with the added bonus of Coffee Girl.

"You should talk to her, Charlie," Shelly suggested, nudging his son lightly yet again. "Ask her on a date."

"No," Charlie shook his head immediately. There was just no way. "I can't, she'd just say no and then I'd keep asking and it would turn into a whole thing for like ten years and I don't wanna go through that again."

Shelly, despite his obvious bewilderment, filed all his new questions away for a different time and place and tried instead to encourage the boy. "You can't know that for sure, son. Listen here, I'm going to find the jacks. She'll be headed your way in a minute, why don't you talk to her?" Shelly hauled himself out of his seat and landed a heavy hand on Charlie's shoulder before he left.

Charlie, unsure of who exactly Jack was and why Shelly needed to find multiple of him, shook it off and began to mentally prepare himself. He'd never actually been a customer at this coffee shop before, always having hung around outside or snuck in to get a look at Coffee Girl before he chickened out and ran back home. There was no way he could handle another rejection from a dream girl. Having taken enough rejection to last most men a lifetime every other week, Charlie wondered if it was worth it to try at all anymore. Things had ended so badly with The Waitress, and after all the time he'd put into her, all the love he'd given over all those years. He wasn't sure if he could take that kind of rejection ever again. But there was just something about Coffee Girl, he couldn't describe it. Something deep inside of him just told him that she was the one for him. That little voice in the pit of his chest always fighting all the other, much louder, much meaner voices in his brain telling him that she'd only hurt him like The Waitress. Or that he wasn't good enough for her, or that he'd already screwed it up somehow, or that–

"Hello? Sir?"

Shit.

How long had she been standing there? How long was he staring off into space like a maniac? She had to hate his guts now, of course she did, why wouldn't she? He was a creep and now she knew it, too.

"H..." Charlie made to say hello back, but the word got caught in his throat. It just came out as a throaty, breathy sound, and the crazed look in his eye only served to make him look all the more deranged. Nevertheless, he pushed through, remembering Shelly's encouragement and listening to the little voice in his heart for once. "Hello."

And then she did something that made him think that somewhere along the way, he'd died and gone to heaven.

She smiled at him. So beaming and bright and full of warmth that he thought he might never be cold again. It caught him so off guard he couldn't speak. In all the years he'd spent loving The Waitress, he could count the number of times she'd smiled at him on one hand. And at least three of them had been cruel and at his expense.

"Hi!" Coffee Girl greeted him, overly chipper to have received his full attention. "How are you, this morning?"

"Good! I'm," he laughed nervously, that had been too loud, "I'm good. How are you?" So far so good, even though he was sweating through his shirt. Oh well, the army jacket would hold off the pit stains from being visible hopefully until the end of this interaction.

"I'm great, thank you for asking," she replied and smiled down at him once again with a certain twinkle in her eye (he was right, they really did sparkle). Charlie had seen it before, usually directed at Dennis from some drunk, helpless girl, but he knew what it meant all the same. She liked him. Maybe just barely, but she did.

Coffee Girl looked at him a little too long, smile faded but still soft on her lips. She couldn't help it, he was just so cute. Obviously, he was also quite nervous to be talking to her, which only made him that much more endearing. He just held that eye contact with her for so long that she almost forgot she was supposed to ask him his order.

"Sorry," she shook her head with a light, embarrassed laugh, cheeks turning the slightest pink shade. Charlie felt his heart leap at the sight. "Can I get you anything?"

"Date?" he asked, suddenly. So suddenly, he caught even himself by surprise. The way her eyebrows jumped up just a little sent his heart right back into his stomach, and he stumbled to explain himself. "No! Not a date, sorry– like a, um, y'know, like–"

"Are you asking me on a date?" Coffee Girl interrupted him, if only to stop him spiralling.

Here it comes. Dammit, Charlie. He should've known better. Now, she was going to laugh, tell him that was ridiculous and walk away. Or glare at him and snarl that she'd rather do literally anything else in the world. His brain voices were right and he should've just listened to them in the first place. Now, he had to brace himself for the inevitable, painful rejection. The only thing he could do was apologize and hope he never saw her again.

It was only when she kept talking that he realized he'd never actually answered her question of whether or not he was asking her on a date. It probably didn't matter, anyway.

"Cause if you are, I'd– well, I'd like that, a lot," she spoke. This was out of character for her, she didn't usually do this sort of thing. But something told her that Charlie didn't either, and if she didn't make some kind of move, they'd stay right there staring at each other until they were both grey and old. "But I don't know your name."

Charlie was frozen. He knew he should respond. He wanted to, more than anything. But he just couldn't believe his own ears. She had said yes. Had she said yes? He thought she did.

"Yes," he blurted out, saying the first word that came to mind. Shaking his head and starting over, he said, "sorry, I mean, I'm Charlie." With that, he gave her a toothy grin that made her heart melt into a puddle.

"It's okay, Charlie, you don't have to be sorry." There was that warm smile again, and that sweetness that he loved. Charlie supposed that he shouldn't have been so surprised. He knew she was sweet, that was why he liked her in the first place. For whatever reason, he just expected her to be sweet to everyone else but him. Most girls usually were.

His smile faded down into one that was a little more natural. Gentle, kind, and overall surprised at her good nature. It was a very pretty smile, she noticed. And while she would've loved to stare at it until her shift ended at eight o'clock, she could see her manager beginning to poke his head out of his office.

"Could I get you something to drink?" she asked him in a voice that made him wonder if she'd dipped her tongue in honey while he wasn't looking.

He grinned sheepishly and asked, "you don't have any beer, do you?"

Coffee Girl grinned back, pride swelling her. "It's your lucky day, Charlie," she teased him good-naturedly.

As Charlie felt another flutter in his chest, he spotted Shelly coming back over out of the corner of his eye. Here he was, Charlie Kelly, sitting in a coffee shop, arranging a date with the cutest coffee shop waitress he'd ever laid his eyes on, his father only a few steps away, a beer with his name on it, and even the sun peeking out from behind the clouds. He almost couldn't believe it. Maybe he really had died and gone to heaven. Maybe that cruise ship really was purgatory, and everything between then and now was hell. Maybe getting away from The Gang was the one thing he needed to do in order to get into heaven. Whatever the case, he was sure it didn't matter.

Delicate smile still perched upon his lips, Charlie locked eyes with Coffee Girl once more. He spoke softly, "yeah, I think it is."

[oliverreedmasterass]

Words: 8k

Synopsis: Based on a hilarious personal anecdote from the incredible @writingcold about seeing something bizarre at a hotel in Green Bay, the GVF guys find themselves caught in a heap of trouble. The problem is, they can't quite work out what they did.

Warnings: language, drinking, drug use, mentions of theft, drowning, and running into traffic

__________________________________________

“Do you know why you’re here, son?” a graying man dressed in a loose-fitting two-piece suit with a strewn purple tie leaned close to the young man who sat across from him at the aged wooden table. 

“No clue,” Jake avoided eye contact while wringing his hands together out of sight of the older man. He snuck a quick glance at the man’s golden nametag pinned to his chest. Doug. “I was just minding my business in my room and then somebody dragged me down here. Am I in trouble?” 

“Depends on how much you’re willing to share with me today,” Doug stared back at Jake with his piercing blue eyes. “I’m gonna need you to tell me what you were up to last night.” 

Jake’s face pinched as he tried to think back. He made a humming noise to stall, and wiped at his mouth - a nervous tick he had never been able to shake. 

“My band and I were out getting drinks,” Jake remembered. “At Ned Kelly’s Pub. Someone recommended the place to us since they’re known for their sour beers. It’s something I’ve been getting into a lot more recently.” 

It was a perfectly normal evening. Like, genuinely, nothing crazy was going down. Jake, Josh, Sam, and Danny all squeezed around a tall pub table, leaning over their pints to sip out of the top of the overfilled glasses. Jake wiped his mouth with the back of his hand to clear the foam from his upper lip and craned his neck to look over Josh’s head at the live band. They were playing a Creedence Clearwater Revival song, and it sounded good enough that Jake started to tap his foot to the beat.

“I can’t believe we’re in Green Bay,” Josh called over the music to his friends. Jake took another slurp from his glass and then nodded his head in agreement. 

“We had the opportunity to go anywhere in the world, and we settled on Wisconsin.” 

“I don’t regret it,” Sam shrugged. “It’s not too far from home and, hey, I’ve always wanted to get my hands on one of those Packers cheese hats.” 

Jake gazed at the ridiculous cheese hat that was perched atop Sam’s head and grimaced at how stupid his younger brother looked. 

“I’m becoming one with the cheese,” Sam proudly stated.  

Jake flicked at Sam’s hat, knocking it just slightly off of his forehead. 

“Are you really gonna keep that thing on all night, Sammy?” he asked. He had noticed Sam was earning some strange looks from the other patrons in the bar which gave him serious second-hand embarrassment. Sam let out a loud laugh at Jake’s question and forced the hat back down on his head so it was set in place. 

“I know you hate it, Jake. So, yeah.” 

Jake faked a scowl, but couldn’t help chuckling into his beer. He took a deep sip and let the taste of the sour beer wash over him. Their Lyft driver had totally been right when she recommended this place. It was by far the best sour beer he had ever had, which was seriously saying something.

Jake took in the bar around him while he worked on his drink. It was classy and pretty packed, which felt just right. He knew he had stepped foot in hundreds of bars like Ned Kelly’s Pub before, but that just made it feel more like home. 

When he finished his drink, Jake stepped away from the table and grabbed his glass, motioning back towards the bar that was only getting more crowded. “I’m gonna get a refill. Anyone need anything?” 

“Ask if they have peanuts!” Sam shouted with enthusiasm. He enjoyed throwing the peanut shells at Josh and getting them stuck in his curly floof. 

“Don’t do that,” Josh firmly told Jake. “It took me two weeks to get them all out of my hair last time. Two weeks!” 

Jake looked beyond Josh to Danny, who was mouthing at him to go and get the peanuts. Jake shook his head at his friends and made his way to the bar, where the bartender was finishing up another order for a group of women around his age. 

“Just a second,” the bartender held up his finger to Jake, who nodded his head with a smile. While he waited, he bobbed his head along to the live band’s Allman Brothers cover. 

“Hey,” a voice said next to Jake. “You look familiar.” 

Jake was curious where the conversation would go, so he turned to his left and looked at one of the women who was waiting for her drink. “Do I?” he asked with a cheeky grin. While he usually didn’t like the attention, he sometimes got a kick out of people trying to place his face. The amount of times people had mistaken him for Julien Baker was extraordinary. 

“Did we go to high school together?” the woman guessed. Jake had heard that one plenty of times. 

“Not unless you grew up in Frankenmuth, Michigan,” Jake replied. 

“Really? You don’t sound like you’re from Michigan,” the woman observed. This comment threw Jake off. 

“Where would you guess I was from?” 

“You’ve got, like, an echo of a British accent. It’s really interesting.” 

“What can I get for you?” The bartender’s attention was finally on Jake. 

“Fill ‘er up,” Jake motioned down to his glass. 

With his glass filled to the brim once more, Jake made a detour over to where the band was playing so he could watch the guitar player. The guy obviously had a lot of experience under his belt, because he was hitting every note in perfect precision. Jake liked to think that he was a pretty talented guitar player, but this guy wasn’t making a single error, and it was blowing his mind. 

Once they finished their song, Jake gave them an extra loud whoop in front of the stage. “Bravo!” he added. 

“Hey, thanks,” the lead singer grinned at Jake. “Got any requests?” 

“Play Cream and I’m never leaving this joint,” Jake beamed wide. 

“You better get yourself comfortable then,” the guitarist chuckled before launching into SWLABR. Jake let out a whoop in glee, gave the band a thumbs up, and made his way back to his friends’ table. 

“Hey there, social butterfly,” Josh poked fun at Jake. 

“I like the vibe of this place,” Jake shrugged. “The band said they would play Cream for me.” 

“So what you’re saying is it’s gonna be impossible to get you out of here, right?” Danny stared at Jake. 

Jake swigged down more beer, and then nodded in Danny’s direction. “You’re gonna have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming.” 

Danny shook his head at Jake with a smile between his pursed lips and Jake stuck his tongue back out at him. He jumped in surprise when he saw the woman from earlier at the side of their table. 

“I figured out where I know you from,” she announced, looking proud. Jake arched an eyebrow. “You’re from that rock band!” 

“Bingo,” Jake pointed at her. As fun as it was to get misrecognized, there was something gratifying in knowing that they were big enough to get spotted out in public. 

“My sister is a huge fan,” the woman continued. “She saw you guys during your last tour and said that your show was literally life changing. She’d die if she knew I was talking to you right now. But, uh, I’m sure you’re used to hearing this, so I’ll keep it brief. I just wanted to bring this over to thank you for making my sister so happy.” 

Jake stared at the tall pint that the woman was handing out to him in awe. 

“It’s a Copper State Sun Soaked - I overheard you ordering it at the bar,” the woman continued as she slipped the glass into Jake’s hands. 

“Thank you,” Jake told her, and he really meant it. The woman waved goodbye to him and made her way across the bar back to her friend group. Jake looked down at the pint in his hands, and set it next to his other glass. 

“Water for the rest of the night after this, I promise,” Jake looked around at everyone. “Mark my word.” 

“And that’s what I did,” Jake told the older man. “We hung around the bar for about another hour, and then we made our way back to the hotel. I went to my room and crashed almost immediately. Then, when I woke up, I was brought down here.” 

“Interesting,” Doug studied Jake. The kid looked like he was being sincere, which threw Doug and his hypothesis in for a loop. He searched Jake’s face for any signs of deceit. “I sent you down here to talk to me because there was vandalism reported in the lobby last night.” 

“Really?” Jake’s eyebrows raised. “What happened?”

“Let’s just say that someone tampered with something that’s really important to me and my hotel.”  

Jake had no trouble looking Doug in the eyes this time around. “I can promise you, sir, I had nothing to do with it.”

Doug gazed at Jake a few beats longer, and then nodded his head. “You’re free to go.”

“Oh thank god,” Jake heaved out and then rose from his seat. 

“But I want you to send in someone else from your party,” Doug continued. Jake frowned at that. 

“We have to hit the road soon.” 

“Don’t worry, it won’t take long.” 

Jake gave a grunt, and left the room in silence. A few minutes later, his twin, Josh, entered into the hotel manager’s office, looking around at the IKEA-inspired decor. 

“Love what you’ve done with the place,” Josh greeted Doug. “Fake plants are really in right now.” 

“Take a seat,” Doug motioned towards the wooden chair that his brother had just been nervously sitting in. Josh slowly lowered himself into the seat and then folded his hands politely in his lap. 

“Is this about the bathrobe I took from the bathroom? Because I thought it was complimentary. If it’s not, I’ll put it back.” 

“Don’t worry about that,” Doug shook his head. “It’ll just get charged to your card.” 

“Aw man,” Josh pouted. 

“I’m trying to fit the pieces of a mystery together, and I need your help. Can you tell me what you did last night?” 

Josh gave Doug a look that showed he was surprised by the question, but shrugged. “My pals and I went to this pub right by the river for their tap selection. We wanted to have a celebratory night out before we headed back home to Michigan.” 

The night was already exhausting. Jake, Josh, Sam, and Danny all squeezed around a tall pub table, leaning over their pints to sip out of the top of the overfilled glasses. Josh winced at the taste of the sour beer and nudged the drink away from him. The rest of his friends were still hard at work, slurping down the beer with content. Josh folded his hands in front of him and thought about their weekend away from home. Their trip to Green Bay had started on a whim, inspired by a side comment from Sam about how they had never really spent any quality time in Wisconsin. Paired with Danny’s recent That 70s Show obsession, it only seemed right that they would squeeze into the Jeep Truck and hit the road west. 

In their 72 hours they had enjoyed some hikes, visited a cool botanical garden, and, of course, hit up as many bars as they could. Josh wasn’t sure what he thought about Ned Kelly’s Pub. Although the massive chandelier made out of glass bottles was pretty impressive, Josh didn’t feel like it outshined the other places they had visited. However, looking around at his friends’ faces, he could tell that they were all enchanted by the bar. They were gonna be there for a while. 

After trading some jokes about Sam’s goofy cheese hat that he had picked up at the National Railroad Museum gift shop earlier in the day, Josh noticed that Jake’s big glass was already empty. The guy must have enjoyed that sour beer a whole lot more than he had. 

“Pace yourself, tiger,” Josh found himself telling Jake without thinking. Jake had promised that he would drive a leg of their trip back to Michigan the following day, and there was no way he was getting out of it by pulling the hungover card. He had used that one way too many times. 

Josh noted that Jake genuinely looked surprised by his alcohol intake, but his shock seemed to last a millisecond since he bounced over to the bar for a refill without hesitation. 

“Do you like this shit?” Josh asked Sam and Danny, pointing an unenthusiastic finger down at his sour beer. He was relieved to see Sam and Danny both shrugging. 

“It’s okay, I guess,” Danny sounded indifferent. 

“I don’t get what the hype is,” Sam chimed in. “This tastes like soap.” Sam then proceeded to take another long chug. 

“Jake seems to like it though,” Danny commented. They all turned to watch the guitarist saunter up to the bar, slam his empty glass down on the counter, and grin at the bartender. The three watched with more interest when they noticed a woman peel away from her group of friends to talk to him. Jake seemed to be torn between getting the bartender’s attention to fill his glass and listening to the woman, but he eventually started conversing with her. 

“What do you think they’re talking about?” Josh wondered. 

Sam snorted. “He’s probably trying to convince her he has a Grammy.” 

Josh noted that Jake’s body language was unusually confident as he talked to the stranger. The woman towered over him in her heels, but he seemed at ease as they laughed over something. When he got his drink, he looked like he was coming back to them, but then quickly diverted his path to head to the live band, who was playing Midnight Rambler. Josh couldn’t help but chuckle when he saw Jake move uncomfortably close to the stage, staring at the guitarist with his eyes wide. 

“He’s freaking that guy out,” Josh commented under his breath. Sam and Danny paused their side conversation about how Sam could style his cheese hat to watch Jake take slow steps closer and closer to the stage. “He looks like he’s on the brink of taking the guitar away from that guy.” 

“He better not,” Danny frowned. “We’re already banned from a handful of bars because of that.” 

They all exhaled in relief when the band broke into a Cream song and Jake, in complete euphoria, returned to the table. Josh watched in horror as Jake guzzled his second glass down in less than 10 seconds like it was nothing. He let out a burp, smiled happily, patted his stomach, and then jolted upright when he realized he had cleared his pint. 

“How is that surprising to you?” Josh asked Jake. “You’re the one who drank it all, it’s not like it magically disappeared.” 

“These are just going a lot faster than I had anticipated, I guess,” Jake looked troubled. 

They made a pact after some arguing that Jake would stick to water for the night, but that quickly went down the drain when the woman approached the table, gave Jake a wink, and placed another tall pint of sour beer in front of him. Josh wanted to scream at the lady to give that beer to literally anyone else in the establishment but Jake, but his mouth remained glued shut. He watched in despair as Jake, once more, threw the entire pint back like it was a shot. Frat guys around the world would be in utter awe of what he was doing. 

“Water for the rest of the night. I promise,” Jake promised, starting to slur his words. “Mark my word.” 

Jake did not stick to his word. 

Over the next 45 minutes, Jake managed to sneak three more pints of the Copper State Sun Soaked. Whether it be bribing someone to bring him a glass in the bathroom, sipping one under the table, or lapping up spills behind the bar, Jake’s BAC was guaranteed to be nearing staggering heights. 

When Jake decided to tear off his shirt and jump on stage to play the tambourine with the poor live band that was just trying to get through a Bob Seger song, Josh threw in the towel. 

“I can’t do this tonight,” Josh admitted to Danny, who looked equally tired of Jake’s antics. “I’m gonna go back to my room and watch some HGTV to unwind.” 

“And I left the bar after that,” Josh concluded his story. “I’m pretty sure I heard them get back to their room around 2am last night. They were a bit loud, but they quieted down pretty fast.” 

“Your brother said that he stuck to water last night after his third drink,” Doug tapped his chin. 

“Well then, he’s a liar,” Josh shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you. But what does Jake’s drinking last night have to do with anything?” 

“Nothing you have to worry about,” Doug shook his head. Josh looked like he wanted to protest, but Doug quickly motioned for the door. “Please send your brother, Sam, in. I want to talk to him.” 

“Fine, but you better take it easy on him. He’s a sensitive guy, it doesn’t take a whole lot to spook him,” Josh warned Doug. He chuckled at Josh’s warning and, once more, pointed for the door. 

“No need to worry, I’ll be nice to the little guy.” 

Sam entered the room next, still wearing his cheese hat, which he had styled with a pair of black slacks, a yellow button up shirt, and yellow Adidas. 

“What’s up, Doc?” Sam greeted the older gentleman as he peeled a large orange and started to slide the slices into his mouth. Doug motioned for Sam to take a seat at his desk and Sam complied after he took a pause to snap a photo of Doug’s bald head with his fancy camera. “I never thought I’d get to chat with a hotel manager one-on-one like this,” Sam continued to chatter while balancing the orange peels on top of the desk. 

“Sam,” Doug cleared his throat. “I want you to take this conversation seriously.” 

“Are you mad at me?” Sam theatrically called out, his eyes started to well up. Doug started to stumble on his words, panicking over the fact that the curly haired one had been right about his younger brother. 

“No, of course not,” Doug assured Sam, using his sweetest tone. “I just need you to tell me about your time last night at Ned Kelly’s Pub.” 

“How did you know I was at Ned Kelly’s Pub last night,” Sam squinted his eyes at Doug.

“Your brothers told me.” 

“Oh, well, in that case,” Sam chuckled. He grabbed the desk lamp from Doug’s desk and flicked it on so he could hold it under his chin, creating grisly shadows on his face. “It was a cold and dark night in Green Bay, Wisconsin,” Sam started off in a dramatic tone. Doug took a seat across from him and held his head in his hands. This was going to be a long testimony. 

“Since you already know that we were at Ned Kelly’s Pub, I’ll spare you the details about Daniel and I stealing a horse downtown beforehand. You don’t need to hear about that.” 

“Wait,” Doug tried to interrupt Sam. “I actually do want to hear about that.” 

“I was standing at this tall table with my best friend and my brothers, feeling on top of the world with my cheese hat,” Sam cut off Doug, staring into the distance.

It was a bonkers night. Sam and Daniel kept flashing each other excited grins. They had taken something in the parking lot of the bar to really lean into the That 70s Show fantasy that Daniel was trying to live out. Sam had no idea what they had sent into their systems, but it tasted like cherries and made him feel like he was floating. 

He could hear what his brothers and Daniel were saying, but his head wasn’t processing any of it. He felt like he was on autopilot as he gave short answers and laughed when everyone else did. When the conversation shifted to Jake’s drinking, Sam found himself staring daggers at the bartender. He couldn’t help it, the guy looked just like Ben Affleck. In fact, the more Sam stared at him, the more certain he was that the guy really was the A-list actor. Sam had hated his portrayal of Bruce Wayne in Batman Vs. Superman; it was a travesty.

He was ready to storm up to the guy to demand who he thought he was, dating J-Lo and being the moody cigarette “it” boy and all, but Jake beat him to it. Sam watched Jake approach the bartender and let his shoulders slump in defeat. That was a fight to pick later. Plus anyways, Sam had a bigger bone to chew: there was a portal opening on the dancefloor. Sam stared at the streaking lights of blue, yellow, and orange that seemed to be flinging out of the portal in every direction and could tell that his eyes were dilating. 

“Woah,” he whispered out in awe. Josh gave him a quick glance but shook his head and went back to blabbing about how Jake was weird for liking the sour beer. Sam was pretty sure he had agreed that it tasted bad, but really he didn’t mind it. His sense of taste was heightened to God-levels, so each sip made him feel like he was consuming the elixir of life. 

Sam tried to send Daniel morse code messages by batting his eyelashes, but Daniel just winked back at him. He was disappointed that they hadn’t reached the point where they could telepathically communicate with each other, but he knew it was bound to happen eventually. 

“How do bus drivers exit the bus and close the door when they’re the last shift?” Sam wondered aloud. Josh didn’t hear him, but Daniel did and widened his eyes, his mouth hung open. 

“Dude,” Daniel mumbled in awe. Sam was too hung up on that philosophical question to notice Jake rejoining their table, cradling another pint. He only turned his attention towards his older brother when he saw Jake unhinge his jaw to suck down all of the beer in one animalistic gulp out of the corner of his eye. Sam paled at the sight and started to run through the possibilities. 

Was his brother a lizard person? Was that a normal thing that people could do? Or did he and Daniel take some seriously good shit in the parking lot? 

Josh started to yell something at Jake, and Sam cupped his head in his hand, focusing on breathing through his ears. He saw a woman with five arms approach Jake and slip another drink in his hand. All over again, Jake’s jaw unhinged and the drink was gone. He chewed the glass and everything. 

Sam couldn’t stay silent on the issue anymore, and tried to blink in morse code to Daniel, “BATHROOM” but Daniel fluttered his eyelashes back at Sam, obviously not getting the message. Sam sighed and jutted his thumb in some general direction. 

“It’s piss time for me, the piss boy,” he shouted over the music. Josh and Jake both paused from their arguing to stare at Sam, and then Sam scampered away. 

He was grateful that Daniel trailed behind him and leaned into his side when they were out of sight of the twins.

“Jake is a lizard person,” Sam shared. Daniel jumped away from Sam and shook his head in disbelief. 

“No way. But he doesn’t like the sunlight that much.” 

“Did you see him eat that pint glass?” 

“No?” 

“You must have been distracted by something else.” 

“I saw a guy standing in the corner of the room who claimed he was my great-great-grandfather,” Danny remembered. “Wait, what were we talking about?” 

Sam tried to think back on what information he had been so desperate to share with Daniel, but came up short. “I think the bartender is Ben Affleck,” he remembered. 

“That guy stunk as Batman,” Daniel clenched his fist. 

By the time they made it back to their table, Josh looked beyond fed up. He went on a rant about something, but Sam was too busy trying to spot the light molecules coming off the disco ball over the dancefloor to listen. Jake wandered away a few times and, each time he came back, his face looked brighter and happier, until he was a beaming ray of light. Sam squinted to see him. 

“I’m going back to my room,” Josh grumbled, tugging on Sam’s arm to get his attention. Sam made a comment that he thought might make sense, and then focused back on Jake, who had magically appeared on top of the bar and was missing his shirt. 

Ben Affleck shouted something towards Sam and Daniel, and his face turned tomato red when Sam gave him a thumbs up. Sam wondered if the thumbs up gesture meant something rude in Wisconsin, and made a vow to keep his thumb to himself. 

From 10:30pm to 12:30am, Sam stood in the bathroom, gaping at his reflection in the mirror. He could have sworn that his eyes were starting to droop down his cheeks the longer he stared, and the only way he could put them back in place was if he smiled as hard as he could. It was a daunting task but, after 2 committed hours, he finally decided that droopy eyes were actually kind of cool. 

He exited from the bathroom and turned in fifteen full circles looking for Jake and Daniel, but they were nowhere to be seen. Sam wanted to sob at the thought of being left alone, but he quickly reasoned with himself that they trusted him on his own, and had given him a quest to make his way back to the hotel in one piece. 

So Sam stepped out of the bar and dawdled around the empty Green Bay streets. At one point he shed his shoes and chucked them into the river for the fish to wear. He plodded through the desolate neighborhoods, whistling classical music to himself that his parents had played for him on Baby Einstein CDs as a child. He was everywhere and nowhere at once. It was beautiful. 

He couldn’t say for certain what he had accomplished in those hours, but he vaguely recalled something to do with a helicopter, multiple slices of Kraft singles, and a raccoon who wouldn’t stop screaming. 

Around 3am, Sam finally stepped foot into their hotel lobby and was struck with a jarring familiarity at the space. 

“This is my home,” Sam realized in delight. “I made it home. My journey is complete.” 

“And then I fell asleep until literally 20 minutes ago when Josh dragged me out of my room to come down and see you,” Sam finished his tale. Doug looked at him with a twitching eye. 

“You’re telling me you were the one who hijacked the helicopter off the top of the Bellin Building and drove down near the interstate to throw cheese slices at cars?” 

“Probably,” Sam shrugged. “I still don’t know where the screaming raccoon came in though.” 

“Tell me this,” Doug pinched at the bridge of his nose. “Do you remember seeing anything out of the ordinary when you came into the hotel lobby?” 

“I was on drugs,” Sam reminded Doug. “Everything I saw was out of the ordinary.” 

“This is no use,” Doug grumbled. “Is your friend gonna be any help to me, or was he out tripping balls all night long too?” 

“Daniel has a crystal clear memory, inebriated or not,” Sam proudly shared. 

“Send him in then,” Doug asked. Sam shrugged, popped up from his seat, took one more photo of Doug’s bald head, and skipped out of the room. 

“This is a nightmare,” Doug groaned before taking a couple aspirin. 

Danny wandered into the room, looking around him in a panic. When he saw the hotel manager staring at him, he gulped and forced his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. 

“Can I help you?” Danny squeaked. Doug’s furrowed brow loosened when he saw how much the poor guy was trembling. 

“Your friend told me that you have a pretty good memory,” Doug sounded out his words. “It would be a massive help to me and my report if I could get a detailed look into everything that happened with you and your friends last night.” 

Danny looked pale, but he slowly nodded his head. 

“What do you need to know?” 

“Tell me what happened from the second you entered the bar, to when you made it back to your hotel room.” 

“Okay,” Danny whispered. 

The night was frankly a mess. Jake, Josh, Sam, and Danny all squeezed around a tall pub table, leaning over their pints to sip out of the top of the overfilled glasses. Danny was feeling a bit woozy from the LSD he and Sam had taken in the parking lot before entering the bar. It had been Sam’s treat: he wanted Danny to feel like a teen in the 70s as much as he could. Weed probably would have done the trick, but Danny appreciated the gesture. 

It was clear that Sam was hallucinating more than Danny, because every glimpse he caught of his friend, Sam looked like he was seeing the world for the first time. Danny, on the other hand, was dealing with a gnarly headache, a rapid heartbeat, and an overall feeling of disorientation. Sure, he kept seeing a guy who kinda looked like him, but dressed in Pilgrim clothing, speaking in a hush about being his ancestor, but that was the only thing that felt out of the ordinary. 

He took slow sips of the nasty sour beer that made his stomach groan in even more protest, and listened as Jake and Josh poked fun at Sam’s cheese hat. Danny wanted to stand up for Sam and tell off the twins for not respecting the cheese hat, but he felt so queasy, he didn’t want to risk what would happen when he opened his mouth. 

Jake took a long sip from his beer, entirely clearing it of its contents, and Danny was relieved when Josh spoke up. 

“Pace yourself, tiger,” Josh warned his brother. 

“Oh, geez,” Jake murmured under his breath, staring at his glass in awe. Danny could tell that he was surprised by how fast the beer had gone down; they had hardly been standing at the table for more than five minutes. Danny knew: he could feel every second tick away. 

Jake looked conflicted, but eventually opted to take his glass back to the bar for a refill. While he was gone, Josh leaned forward to check and see if Danny and Sam liked the beer at all. Danny let out a burning burp that made him flinch, and then coughed out that it wasn’t great. What really wasn’t great was how his body was reacting to the LSD. 

He watched through squinted eyes as Jake chatted with a nice looking woman at the bar, and then meandered over to the live band that was playing the Allman Brothers. Once he got them to play a Cream song, he made his way back to the table, looking proud of himself. 

“Hey there, social butterfly,” Josh taunted Jake. 

“Fuck you,” Jake growled. "So maybe I like this place."

“So what you’re saying is it’s gonna be impossible to get you out of here, right?” Danny stared at Jake. The last thing he wanted was to be trapped in that bar while he felt like such shit. 

“You’re gonna have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming,” Jake chuckled in between drinks.  

“Jesus Christ,” Sam gaped at Jake. 

“What?” Jake asked, confused once more. Sam, Danny, and Josh all pointed at the tall pint in Jake’s right hand. Jake held it up to his eyeline and paled. It was empty again. “How the hell did I do that?” Jake choked out. 

“You drank that thing like it was a watering hole in the middle of the Sahara,” Danny observed. Jake studied his loose black button up top and took in the dark beer stains dotting his chest and collar. His face reddened in embarrassment. 

“I’ll tone it down, I promise,” he said. “I know we’re leaving tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, and you’re supposed to drive the second leg,” Josh nodded. “I’m not covering for your ass.” 

“I’d ask Sam to drive that leg before I asked you,” Jake protested. “You stink at driving.” 

“Look who’s talking, Mr. Go-95-On-The-Highway!” Josh exclaimed, waving his hands around in a fury.

“It was late at night, there was hardly anyone on the road!” Jake defended himself. 

“Hey, hey,” Danny waved his arms across the table to get the twins to quit bickering. It was really starting to hurt his head. “Let’s not argue over something that isn’t even a problem yet, okay?” 

Danny felt like he had gotten the situation under control, until the woman approached their table. 

“I figured out where I know you from,” she smiled at Jake, looking proud. Jake arched an eyebrow. “You’re from that rock band!” 

“You finally got it,” Jake laughed. 

“Here, have this on me," the woman said.

Jake stared at the tall pint that the woman was handing out to him with hungry eyes. 

“Oh no,” Danny could hear Josh whisper. 

“It’s a Copper State Sun Soaked - I overheard you ordering it at the bar,” the woman continued as she slipped the glass into Jake’s waiting hands. 

“Cheers,” Jake told her. The woman waved goodbye to him and made her way across the bar back to her friend group. Jake looked down at the pint in his hands, and then up at his band members. 

“Give me that,” Josh motioned at Jake. “Before you do something stupid.” 

Jake kept the glass firm in his hands, and tipped it back. 

“You’re kidding me,” Danny gaped. 

“He did it again,” Sam’s eyes widened. 

Jake’s hands shook as he gaped at the third empty glass he had seen in under 20 minutes. “I swear,” he croaked out, “I’m not doing this on purpose.” 

“It sure as hell seems like you are,” Josh countered. “You downed that whole thing while making eye contact with me. In fact, it felt really targeted.” 

“Water for the rest of the night. I promise,” Jake looked around at everyone. “Mark my word.” 

Danny wished they could have just gone back to the hotel at that point, but things never went that smoothly. After having a brief check in with Sam that confirmed Danny’s suspicions that Sam was having the trip of a lifetime, they returned back to their table to find Jake in a much worse state than they had left him. 

“He keeps drinking this shit,” Josh grumbled to Danny, motioning at the pile of empty glasses surrounding Jake. “I can’t get him to stop.” 

“Can’t stop, won’t stop,” Jake burped out. 

“Can stop, should stop,” Josh countered. Jake gave Josh a loud and juicy raspberry, and then tore his shirt over his head. 

“No shirt, no service!” the bartender hollered at Jake as he hopped onto the live band’s small makeshift stage and smacked a tambourine against his ass to their Bob Seger song. 

“I DON’T NEED SERVICE FROM YEW WANKER!” Jake hollered at the man in between barking laughs. Josh stared at his twin in silence for a few beats, and then shook his head in disappointment. 

“I’m not doing this tonight,” Josh spoke in a low grumble. “I’m gonna go back to my room and watch some HGTV to unwind.” 

Danny watched him step away from their table, flip off Jake, and silently move out of the bar and down the city street. He desperately wanted to run after Josh, begging for them to leave together, but he remained glued in place. Jake was transforming into Oliver Reed, and that was something you couldn’t leave unsupervised.

“BOB SEGER IS A GENTLEMAN IF I’VE EVER KNOWN ONE!” Oliver Reed hollered from the stage. He took a pause from his incoherent shouting to bash the tambourine a couple of times over the drummer’s head. 

“Security!” the guitarist called out in a panic. “Can you get this guy out of here?” 

Danny hurried to the stage, climbed up onto the elevated wooden platform, and hoisted Jake over his shoulder. “HOW DARE YEW PUT YER GRIMY HANDS ON ME YEW BIG OLD BUFFOON!” Oliver Reed howled at Danny while trying to scratch him. He got in a few good swipes that slowed Danny down, but he successfully carried his friend out of the bar and was even met with applause as they left. 

Once they were a block away from the bar, Danny set Jake down and forced his shirt into his hands. 

“Put that back on, dude,” Danny snapped. “It’s, like, 30 degrees outside.” 

“ME NIPS KNOW NOTHIN ‘BOUT WEATHER! I’M A MACHINE THAT DOESN’T FEEL COLD, YA TWAT!” 

Danny stared at Jake in disbelief. Oliver Reed was being more of a menace than usual. 

As if his words weren’t biting enough, Jake leaned forward, kicked Danny in the shin, and then tore in the opposite direction down the street. “I hate my life,” Danny groaned before chasing after Jake. 

“RUN RUN RUN AS FAST AS YEW CAN, YEW CAN’T CATCH ME CUZ’ I’M THE BDE MAN!” Oliver Reed cackled over his shoulder at Danny. 

Danny wasn’t happy that Jake was outrunning him by so much, but he could blame that on the LSD. It was challenging to run in a straight line when it felt like the night sky was below Danny’s feet. Talk about bad timing for the hallucinations to kick in. 

“Jake! Oliver! Whoever you are!” Danny called after his friend in desperation. “Can you please stop? I’m so tired!” 

“NO!” Oliver Reed’s voice echoed off in the distance. 

Danny huffed and tried to pick up his pace. Jake was edging closer to the waterfront, and it was making Danny nervous. When Oliver Reed came out, he was often motivated to dive into whatever water was closest by to “seduce the mermaids.” Danny knew for a fact that Oliver Reed didn’t know how to swim (the man sank like a stone), so the stakes were higher than ever. 

Thank goodness Jake stopped. Danny would have been more relieved if he hadn’t done it in the middle of six lanes of oncoming traffic. 

“I PART THEE, RED SEA!” Oliver Reed held a hand up to the cars that were swerving to avoid him. Danny forced back a scream and put his head down to power towards his friend without being smushed into oblivion by an 18-wheeler. How he made it to Jake unscathed, he had no clue. “THE RED SEA! JUST LIKE YER MUM’S PANTIES LAST NIGHT!” Oliver Reed screeched at a cab that just barely missed him. 

“OLIVER!” Danny yelled at the top of his lungs. He was surprised that he actually had his attention. Even though Jake had somehow acquired sunglasses and a fake beard since leaving the bar, making it hard to read his facial expressions, he could still see that Jake was listening to him attentively. “Get out of the road!” Danny continued. 

Jake stared at him a bit longer, and then started to sprint away from Danny again. 

“SKEEDOOSH!” Oliver Reed called over his shoulder with a barking laugh. 

Danny chased Jake nearly everywhere in the city, from the downtown area to the less-populated rural areas just outside of town. It was exhausting work, and Danny kept thinking that Jake was bound to flop over, but he wouldn’t stop. Danny was starting to think that the guy really was a machine, until they made it to the front doors of their hotel. 

“Best be getting me to bed,” Oliver Reed announced at the most normal volume Danny had heard all night. 

“Good,” Danny gasped for breath. 

Entirely unaffected by their extensive aerobics, Jake pushed the front door open and made his way into the lobby. 

“Wouldn’t turn down a sip or two of the good shit,” he decided. Danny tried to stop Jake, but he was moving on a mission towards the bar area, even though it was closed. Danny nearly tripped over Jake’s feet when he came to an abrupt halt, looking up at something in awe, as if looking into the face of a deity. 

“Would yew look at ‘at,” he breathed out as he took in the lifesize statue of Captain Morgan that was standing tall and proud in the middle of the hotel lobby. “The captain of the seven seas, Mr. Cap’n Morgan. I thought he was only a myth, but there he is. Wild shit.” 

“Take a picture, it’ll last you longer,” Danny said, trying to move Jake along. Jake stood firm, staring at Captain Morgan with a newfound interest. 

“He’s tellin’ me I’m shit,” Oliver Reed suddenly growled. “That old Oliver Fucking Reed himself is no worthy pirate. Well, I’ll show ‘im. I’ll show that bastard.” 

“Jake,” Danny’s voice squeaked in shock as he watched Jake jump at the Captain Morgan statue and tear his left hand away like a rabid animal. The sword that was in the statue’s hand loudly clattered to the floor, and Jake was quick to scoop it up. 

“WHO’S THE BEST PIRATE NOW, MORGAN? EH? THE BLOKE WITH ONE HAND AND NO SWORD? I DON’T THINK SO!” 

“Jake!” Danny cried out once more as Jake swirled the sword around and jabbed it into the statue’s plaster chest. 

“YAR!” Oliver Reed cried in triumph. “VICTORY ONCE MORE FOR THE BRITS! GOD SAVE THE QUEEN! OR WHOEVER THE BLOKE IN POWER IS NOW!”

Danny had to plank to the ground with a yelp when Jake chucked Captain Morgan’s left hand as hard as he could across the lobby. They both watched it soar towards the front doors, which automatically opened for the hand and closed when it had fully passed through. Jake attempted to chop with the sword a couple of times as if he was cutting a head of lettuce, and then lit a large cigar to celebrate his victory. 

Danny rose back to his feet and, while Oliver Reed was chuckling to himself about what a great swordsman he was, he lurched forward and forced the sword out of Jake’s grasp. 

“BOLLOCKS!” Oliver Reed hollered in despair. “I’VE BEEN ROBBED!” 

“You’ve been saved,” Danny corrected Jake, holding the sword under Jake’s chin. 

“I’ll call it a draw,” Oliver Reed gulped. 

“You’re gonna do what I say, okay?” Danny growled at the troublemaker. Jake nodded, wincing at the feeling of the sword up against his jugular. “We’re gonna take a nice walk up to your room, you’re gonna get in bed, and you’re gonna have the best night’s sleep of your life.” 

“That sounds bloody nice,” Oliver Reed thought aloud. “Better than a sword through the heart, I reckon.” 

So Danny led Jake upstairs to his room, saw that he made it under his covers, and only left when he heard soft snores coming from the bed. Then he went to the shore of Lake Michigan and chucked the sword as far as he could. 

Finally feeling content with where things were at, Danny made his way to his own room and immediately passed out under the covers to sleep off the LSD. 

“I’m so sorry, Sir,” Danny told Doug with sincerity. “I tried to keep my friend from messing with your statue, but you should see how fast he moves while intoxicated. He’s like a cat.” 

“I should have talked to you first,” Doug gazed at Danny in interest. “That would have saved me a hell of a lot of time and a headache.” 

“What are you going to do with us?” Danny looked fearful. “I can promise you all of this was a big mixup, we have nothing against Captain Morgan, his brand, or your hotel partnership.” 

“Gather your friends. I want to talk to you all.” 

Danny looked on the brink of soiling himself, but he left the room and shortly came back with Jake, Josh and Sam. In his time away, Sam had managed to acquire a cheese board to serve as an accessory with the rest of his outfit. 

They all crowded into the cramped office and Jake shot Danny a worried glance. Danny wasn’t sure how much Jake knew or remembered, so he opted to keep his eyes glued to the floor. He hated how awful he was at lying when he was stressed; he should have done more to cover for his friend instead of recounting every part of the night in excruciating detail. Jake was bound to never talk to him again. Probably Josh too. Sam would most likely still be his friend because he thought it was funny when Jake got in trouble. 

“You’ve probably pieced together why I brought you all in here today,” Doug shared with the group. 

“Nope,” Sam shook his head. “I’m still stumped.” 

“My Captain Morgan statue was desecrated last night, and it’s come to my attention that one of you is at fault.” 

Danny continued to study the floor. 

“Captain Morgan?” Jake’s voice trailed off. His face dropped. The previous night was coming back to him fast. He had not stuck to water after his three pints of beer. 

“Oh no!” Josh called out. “I liked that guy! Very nice decor. Very aquatic.” 

“Captain Morgan,” Doug looked at Jake. Jake stared back at him with wide eyes. “Son, you really need to tone it down with the sour beers.” 

“So I’m not the one who’s in trouble?” Sam asked around. When no one responded to him, he gave the room a peace sign and strolled out the door. “Later skaters,” he called over his shoulder. 

“I know,” Jake choked. “Sour beers aren’t good for me.” 

“They’re just not good, period,” Josh corrected Jake. 

“It’s my fault too,” Danny burst out. “I should have stopped Jake.” 

“You tried your best,” Doug gave Danny a sympathetic gaze. “You weren’t the one who tore off the hand.” 

“But I did dump the sword in the lake.” 

“For the welfare of everyone in the vicinity. I can respect that.” 

“Wait, Jake had a sword last night?” Josh looked around at everyone. “And I missed it?” 

“I’m going to ask that you cover the charge to fix Captain Morgan,” Doug told Jake. “Whether it was your alter ego or not, you were caught on those security cameras doing the dirty work.” 

“So you knew it was me all along?” Jake couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Then why did you make us go through all of that interrogating?” 

Doug shrugged. “I mostly just wanted to try to understand why someone would destroy something as sacred as my Captain Morgan statue.” 

Jake pondered this and eventually nodded, like he understood where Doug was coming from. 

“But now I’m also sitting on a lot of information that the Green Bay police department would find valuable about that horse and helicopter theft that went down last night.” 

“You know, it’s been so nice meeting you,” Danny nervously chuckled, pushing on Jake and Josh’s backs to steer them out of the room. “Jake will get that check sent to you as soon as you get us the invoice. Whatever the price, we’ve got it covered. Thank you so much for your hospitality, and we’ll make sure to give this place five stars on Yelp.” 

Once they were out of the doorframe, Danny looked between the twins. 

“Run,” he hissed. “We’re not getting caught for any more of our crimes today.”