#and confusing … i wish i coukd turn back time and change it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

iblamebighit · 8 years ago

Text

interrupted (m) part VI

pairing: reader x ???

genre: angst. so. much. angst.

summary: part 6 of this trash i call a series.

word count: 3.1k (specifics: 3,095)

warnings/triggers: drinking, swearing, violence, blah... you know the drill

It was meant for yesterday - kook

Your hands shook as you opened the bag to reveal a small velvet box. You bit your lip as that nervousness crept through your stomach. You slowly opened the box and immediately your heart stopped at the contents.

A ring.

You were so taken, you ignored the buzzes coming from your phone. WHaT iS He THiNkinG!? You grabbed the gift bag scrambling through the pink tissue paper to see if there was any explanation to a ring. you found a small note that got lost at the bottom of the bag, your heart was still thumping in your ears. HE DOESN’T MEAN MARRIAGE RIGH-

‘ If your dumbass thinks I’m proposing, think again. ’ The first line read.

and you gasped for air because your heart was beating that fast. THANK FUCK. You calmed yourself down as you continued reading Jungkook’s obviously heartfelt message.

‘ It’s not an engagement ring... but a promise ring.

I promise to be there for you, I promise to make you happy, I promise to accept whatever the future holds for us, I promise to do all of these, whether it means being there for you as a best friend or a boyfriend.

I know what I did was unacceptable and if I could go back in time I'd change everything... I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I'd spend now until forever trying to make it up to you because... I love you. And I was an idiot for not seeing it sooner.

So whatever happens, keep this ring. Whether you accept or reject us being friends or more. because I'll always keep all the promises I tie with this ring…

-kook ’

Tears couldn’t help but roll down your face as you read each word. It all meant so much to you, but the worst thing was; you didn’t know what to do… You had never felt so confused and pathetic in your life, because you loved both Jimin and Jungkook, in ways you couldn’t make sense of, yourself. You glanced down at the silver ring. It was your taste, it was simple, beautiful and elegant. You slipped it on, feeling it slip perfectly into the dip at the bottom of your finger. As much as the piece brought happiness to you, you wanted to sink and burst into tears, because you felt as if you were betraying Jimin.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a buzz from your phone. You sighed, calming yourself down before unlocking your phone. It’s from Hana? You tapped the download button on the image. But nothing prepared you for when the pixels arranged in their place.

What. the. Fuck.

Your heart sank. You couldn’t believe it. You didn’t want to. Jimin wouldn’t… You knew he loved you and he knew that Minah was Jungkook’s ex. He wouldn’t ever…

All of a sudden you were calling him… Jimin, please.

“Please leave a message-”

No.

You called Hana, despite the strain you felt in your throat as tears began to spill.

“y/n. I’m so sorry… but you had to see.”

“I’m not mad at you Hana.” You replied with a broken voice. “I just- I don’t know anymore.” You bawled.

“I’ll come over as soon as my shifts ended okay.”

“I’m trying to call him…”

“He’s at a table with some other guys and Minah’s gone and fucked off somewhere I don’t know… I feel so terrible…”

“Don’t. You did right in telling me.”

“I’ll see if I can pass the phone to hi-” rustling sounds took over the audio before the call was cut.

“Hana?”

You shot her a few texts, but with no reply, you were left alone.

You were left alone with overwhelming feelings washing over you. You didn’t want to cry. You wanted to scream. Your feelings were a huge fucking mess. You couldn’t believe the events that have unfolded within the past couple of days. It was like the world's way of testing ‘how many boys can we fuck y/n over with?’. The deja vu was almost laughable.

You tried to drown that small voice of hope, protecting what was left of your fragile heart in liquor. There was no way you were getting through until tomorrow sober. Even though you knew you would get a massive go from Hana later, you trudged to the fridge.

Hana pov

“I’ll see if I can pass the phone to hi-”, Before Hana could finish, her phone was snatched off her before the bitch herself, Minah.

“It’s really unprofessional to be on your phone whilst on the clock.” she tutted.

“No, my dear… what’s ‘unprofessional’ is eating face with a customer in the corner ‘whilst on the clock’.” Hana smiled, snatching back her phone.

“I don’t care for your tone.” Minah spat through grit teeth. “Do you want to get fired?”

“If it means I don’t have to put up with your pathetic ass most evenings, then please.” Hana smiled. “It’s been not even a whole night and I’ve already had it with you.”

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” Minah seethed through a scowl.

“Happily.” Hana chirped before dismissing herself and gathering her things from the back.

Hana groaned as she pulled her bag and jacket out from the cubby, at least I can get to y/n’s earlier.

To y/n:

I’m on my way

From y/n:

Coukd you buy sone more soju on the way

To y/n:

I’m going to murder you. Put. the. Drinks. Down.

Hana swore under her breath as she hurriedly put her coat on and bag around her, making a b-line for the doors.

“Hana, wait!”

She turned around to find Jimin behind her.

“Jimi-”

“I know it looks awful-”

“looks awful.” She laughed, “Jimin, you made out with Minah, the girl who made Jungkook cheat and now you…” She couldn’t finish her sentence, she was lost for words. Jimin could only just stand and bit his lip. “I just can’t believe it. Not from you. I believed you were good.” She began to make her way to the door.

“No, but you don’t understand. just listen-” He desperately called out. But she didn’t stop.

Jimin POV

Jimin’s head dropped…

“Jimin-ah~” Minah called, patting down the spot next to her as she perched at a booth.

“One sec.” He answered, forcing as smile before reaching for his phone.

To Jungkook:

Go to y/n’s tonight. She needs you.

Hana POV

She hastily grabbed the key from under the mat, shoving the door open and slamming it shut behind her. She threw her stuff on the couch heading straight for your room. She wasn’t surprised to see you curled up in a ball on the floor, at the feet of your bed, empty cans and bottles surrounding you.

“Jesus y/n… alcohol isn’t always the answer.” She sighed sweeping the empty ones into her hand to put in the kitchen.

“But it helps.”

“Tell me that tomorrow morning, when you call me to bring you some Advil and water.”

She hoped for a smile at least, but there you sat with a broken expression taking over your body. She sank down next to you, gently easing your head onto her shoulder. It was in her comfort, you began to cry.

“Shhh, it’s okay…” She whispered, as her fingers brushed through your hair.

“It’s not. God, I feel so pathetic… I thought I was all cried out.” You sniffed, straightening yourself up.

“But you have every right to feel like this. What happened with either of them wasn’t your fault.” She grabbed at your shoulders, looking at you dead in the eye, praying you’d believe it as much as she did.

“It’s starting to feel like it is. It keeps happening to me…”

“As much as it seems like that, it’s not y/n. You have to believe me” She pleaded.

“I’m trying…” You got out just about audibly.

“Should I stay the night? Yuna can probably take my early shift tomorrow at the mocha lab, she still owes me when I covered for her.”

“Yes please.” You sniffed, wiping away your tears. You were sick of crying now.

“Have you eaten?”

You shook your head.

“Drinking on an empty stomach, are you insane?”

You nodded, making her laugh a little and even you smiled a bit.

“Okay,” She sighed, hoisting herself up to get her phone from her bag “but, I’m ordering Thai food, and if you don’t want that… shame.” she joked from the other room.

Y/n pov

You were so thankful for Hana, you honestly wouldn’t know where you’d be without her by your side. She took care of you and it felt like you didn’t deserve her.

You cursed at the fact you were a heavyweight drinker, even though there were so many bottles and cans, you went through, you were only slightly tipsy and nowhere near as drunk as you wanted to be; which meant your head was still reeling. Sometimes you wish you could switch off your brain for a minute. As much as you wanted to just revel in the comforting company of being here with Hana - something in which you haven’t done in a while - there was that nauseous feeling of dread that reminded you that some way or another, tomorrow or later, you were going to have to face it. Face them and figure out the gigantic mess of feelings you have and all the explanations you need and the one you need to tell are all going to be laid out on the table… and as much as finally cleansing yourself of the burden you have been carrying heavily on your shoulders, sounds amazing and relieving, you only knew someone was going to end up broken and in tears.

“y/n?” Hana called out, snapping yourself out of the panicked state you were in.

“Sorry,” you answered, moving to the living room where she was. “What did you need?”

“Just wanted to know what you want to do right now. It’s not that late.” She asked, glancing at the time on her phone.

“Umm, i’m down for whatever, to be honest.” you mumbled, trying to push everything to the back of your mind.

“Do you want to watch a movie or drama or something?”

You nodded in reply, and then shuffled through the closet to find a couple of blankets for yourselves, whilst she put on a drama you were both watching.

“Why is Park Hyunsik so beautiful…” She whispered totally engrossed in the drama on screen.

“Who would you pick if you were in her shoes… like that is one hell of a decision.” You asked as your eyes transfixed on the beautiful people on the screen.

“I don’t know… like Hyunsik is upfront about it but isn’t straightforward about it if you get me, like he didn’t admit it til’ it was too late and got mad at her for liking jisoo even though he never confessed... and jisoo took waaay to long to do something about his thing going on with bongsoon, like I get there that first love/crush childhood friend-love-thing, but he even had a girlfriend even though he knew deep down there was something… ugh, the script writers really love doing this… but I don’t know they have both their reasons good and bad so, I don’t really know who I'd choose. Sorry for the rant lol.”

It was listening to her answer, you saw that it mirrored your situation right now… Jimin would get annoyed with you and Jungkook and you were oblivious to how he was feeling because he was never upfront about it, and Jungkook took having to have Minah cheat on him to realise he wanted you all along.

“Oh y/n… you were happy two seconds ago, what happened my love?” she asked, as she took you into her arms. It was then you realised you were crying.

“I just- I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about everything… i’m such a fucking mess… i’m sorry I ruined tonight.” you bawled

“Don’t, you didn’t do a thing. I’m here for you to make sure you are feeling better. If you want to cry, let it out…” she said, running her hands over your head, as you pathetically cried and wrapped your arms around her.

A knock at the door made you separate, you wiped briskly at your face, she looked at you with concern before heading up to the door.

“Must be the food” She muttered, shuffling through her wallet to find notes before running to open the door

“How much is i- Jungkook… ummm- hiiii.”

You froze, as much as you wanted to laugh at Hana’s reaction, you were just so... shocked that he was here. you heard his huffing and puffing, he must have ran…

“Sorry I got a text from- uh… I got a text and I just needed to know if she was okay.”

“Uhh…” Hana panicked deciding whether she should let him in or not.

“Let him in.” You sighed numbly.

Jungkook instantly ran to your figure, he grabbed you by your shoulders

“Are you okay?”

“Does it look like she’s okay???” Hana deadpanned.

It made you smile a bit. Hana always had that power. Jungkook’s shoulders relaxed at the sight of it.

“Do you need any-”

“Why are you here?” You interrupted.

He looked down at you hands, signalling you to do the same.

“I made a promise remember.”

You stared at the ring, you forgot you had even had it on.

“Do you need me to stay the night?” He continued.

“I’ve got Hana… But it’s-”

“Ummmmmm… about that… y/n please don’t hate me but yuna can’t do tomorrow’s morning shift for me sooo…” Hana guiltily sang.

You sighed, before whipping your head and giving her those ‘i hate you but not really’ evils.

“I’d really appreciate not being alone tonight.” You surrender and that bunny like grin took over his face.

“I kinda have to get some clothes though so I'll be back in like 20-”

“We’ll drive.” Hana offered abruptly.

“We?” you question

“Come on, let’s go for a drive. I don’t think uh… he’ll be there now, he’s probably still with jaebum.” Hana said, her words careful.

“Fine.” You sigh before the three of you walked to Hana’s car.

The drive wasn’t long at all, only two songs played on the radio before you were in front of the dorm. To the place where everything started not at all long ago. You swallowed thickly and something stirred in your stomach thinking about it all.

“You guys coming in or-” Jungkook offered

“We’ll stay.” You subconsciously blurted within seconds. the sheer look of the building, had goosebumps flooding and cold sweat forming on your forehead. You had to rip your eyes away from it.

You didn’t see it, but you could feel Hana and Jungkook sharing a concerned look about you at each other; before he opened the car door to leave.

“Maybe this was a bad idea… i’m sorry…” Hana guiltily whispered as she rubbed your back.

“No. Sorry, It’s just me freaking out again.” You mumble.

You turned to look at the house, a weird feeling came over you. You hated looking at the stupid brickwork… but it was almost like something was compelling you to go in. Before you knew it, you were unbuckling your seatbelt.

Jungkook POV

Jungkook huffed as he got out of the car, he hated seeing you like this. He felt insanely guilty. He was about to reach for the handle when the door opened. His jaw dropped.

“Minah? What the fuck are you doing here.” He spat.

“Calm down baby, i’m not here for you.” Minah sighed, rolling her eyes.

“That doesn’t answer my fucking question.”

“It’s weird, I know… But i’m with Jimin now…” She gushed. Jungkook’s stomach flipped. No way.

He looked back at the car, praying you were talking to Hana, facing the other way.

“Is y/n waiting for you?” She teased, “She was always sooo into you even when we were dating ugh. But you know what they say give to the less fortunate-”

“Don’t you dare talk about her like that.” He seethed, gritting his teeth trying to restrain himself from slapping her. “You have 10 seconds to get off this property or I swear I'll-”

“Alright Alright, i’m leaving.” She sighed, brushing past him to leave. “Night Night Jungkookie~” She teased before she cockily strode off.

Jungkook slammed the door shut behind him. He couldn’t believe it. He was too confused which only fuelled his anger. Was he mad at Minah or Jimin, and what hurt more whether the fact Jimin was with his ex or the fact he didn’t tell him. He could’ve sworn Jimin hated Minah, he could’ve sworn Jimin wasn’t the type of person to ever do that.

Anger seethed through his bones thinking about it. It was a betrayal. To him and to y/n. He was mad. Jungkook stormed up the stairs to Jimin’s room. He shoved the door open, letting out a huge bang as the handle met the wall. Jimin’s eyes grew wide and he leapt off the bed, backing away at the pissed off maknae. He knew the one thing he could possibly be angry about right now.

“Jungkook. Calm down. We’ll talk.” He warned, still backing away in fear.

Jungkook grabbed one of the pillows, throwing it to the floor with extreme force to let his anger out.

“Kook, man, I swear I wouldn’t do that to you. You know that.”

“THEN WHY DID I JUST SEE HER LEAVE THE HOUSE!” Jungkook screamed, falling to his knees. Rugged breathes fell out of Jungkook’s shaking form, to keep him calm and to keep him from crying. Jimin let Jungkook calm down and he slowly inched closer to him.

“Hyung… you betrayed me, you broke y/n’s heart and I swear you hated Minah-”

“I do.” Jimin interrupted.

“Wait… what? Are you fucking kidd-”

“You want the truth, Kook. I love y/n. but, the way I look at her, i-it’s the same way she looks at you… And the only way to make her yours… was to get Minah out of the equation.” Tears threatened to spill as he bore his soul in front of Jungkook.

He tried to tell Hana, and he was planning on telling Jungkook; as much as he wanted you to know, he couldn’t. It would only mess things up with you and Jungkook.

“Hyung…” Jungkook whispered at a loss for words.

Jimin sank down on the side of his bed.

“Pathetic, I know… But her happiness matters more than mine.”

“You don’t get to decide that.”

Jimin and Jungkook froze, before turning their heads to find you standing in the doorway.

a/n: i know it’s long overdue so thank you for your patience and i really hope you are still enjoying this series. <3 shoutout to daisy @veronamuses for editing this <3

as always stay horny, stay shook and stay safe

-e

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