#and cars... in azeroth

[wp100]

so today at work i daydreamed about a warcraft movie except they somehow end up on Earth instead of Azeroth.

just imagine Khadgar applying to work in customer service, lmfao

[late-to-the-fandom]

Daily Writing Challenge - February 2024

Throwing myself headfirst out of the moving car that is my many-months hiatus and into the roadside ditch that is writing again, I have challenged myself to write for the @daily-writing-challenge's February prompts every day this week. The goal: remember how writing - particularly finishing a piece of writing - works. These will all be snippets from Prince Renathal and companion's continued adventures in the Dragon Isles (full stories here). Will they be any good? Probably not. But they will be done (maybe).

Day 1: Flirt - 600 words, no warnings

The saviour of Azeroth and the Shadowlands, champion of the Horde, former archmage and famous Maw Walker lay her weary body back against the sun-warmed grass and closed her eyes with a final, defeated sigh.

The Dark Prince raised one eyebrow, unimpressed.

“Not giving up already, are you?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Oh, please,” he scoffed, pushing off the railing with a clunk of plate armour and descending the ancient stone staircase toward his motionless companion. “You cannot give up. I know you too well. You are incapable of accepting defeat.”

“First time for everything," was her petulant reply.

Renathal’s wordless disapproval was a masterful sound, full of throaty skepticism and dubiously clicking fangs. Elisewin refused to acknowledge it. Her eyes remained shut, limp arms drowned in the swaying grass, determinedly ignoring the vibrant butterflies fluttering curiously around her wild, windswept fan of dark hair.

Coming to a stop beside her would-be corpse, Renathal tried a different tact.

“An ignominious end for such an illustrious hero.” He announced the words like a eulogy, gesticulating elegantly to his audience of butterflies, who showed no obvious interest. “Imagine - grappling with gods, conquering whole armies, destroying any number of mountainous beasts, only to be beaten by -”

“It’s so stupid,” spat Elisewin suddenly from the ground. Her eyes snapped open in a blaze of blue-white fury. “It’s such a stupid, ridiculous test of an even more ridiculous practice, and I don’t see why I should have to learn it. I was perfectly happy with my old Undercity bat. Slow and steady. That thing -” She twisted her head to throw an accusatory glance at the proto-drake sniffing the bushes at the base of the nearby cliff. “It reacts to the slightest movement! I can’t even breathe without it changing direction. And it goes too fast!”

“I have never known you to mind fast. You usually request it,” remarked Renathal playfully.

Elisewin narrowed her eyes at him instead.

“Don’t flirt with me when I’m frustrated.”

Renathal laughed aloud at that. Mustering all her available dignity, Elisewin turned her face pointedly away from him and closed her eyes again.

“And I mean it. I’m done. I’ve tried sixteen times now, and I'm all over bruises. I am not trying it again. I’ll just walk everywhere.”

Wholly undaunted, Renathal swallowed the last of his laughter and fixed his tone into something that might have been mistaken for sympathy by someone who did not know him well.

“Very well, dearest, if you are certain." He stepped around her studiously still form and headed towards her waiting mount, calling behind him: “You can simply ride alongside me. I am happy to take the lead. I, personally, do not find the practice particularly taxing. Then again, I am much older, with a greater reservoir of power to draw from. You can hardly hold yourself to my standard."

A rustle of grass, a low groan, then a series of furious soft-soled footsteps assured Renathal this last hand had won. He turned expectantly, already holding out the proto-drake’s cracked leather reins. Elisewin snatched them from him. Her lavender glower as she swung one leg over the bulky creature's back only made Renathal smile.

“Ah,” he declared in affectionate triumph, propping himself against the rocky cliffside to watch his lover's seventeenth attempt. “That is the Maw Walker I know."

It was Elisewin’s turn to scoff. She wriggled uncomfortably, settling back into the saddle. Fixing her grim expression on the looming tower at the top of the cliff, she declared to the wilderness around them:

“I’d take the Maw over dragon riding any day.”

[tamiisnthere]

Crossover Universe - Gepardia Town Lore

I have to say it was a bit of a chore to describe the town/city, but I enjoyed it I confess. Although I feel like it's not quite perfect as always.

The important thing I have to say is that visuals are concepts, because I have no idea exactly what this town and coat of arms should look like yet. Should there be something missing or you've got some idea, feel free to tell me. 😊

Enjoy! (⌒_⌒;)

Concept Coat of arms:

(made in Armoria by Azgaar)

About the town:

Population: around 4000, but the number is gradually increasing

Area: 20.43 km2 (square kilometres) | 7.89 sq mi

Highest Elevation: 131 m | 429.79 ft

Racial diversity: The most common races are humans and night elves, who make up nearly three-quarters of the city's population. In smaller numbers are trolls, dwarves, gnomes, orcs, taurens and several others.

History: A few residents from the capital, Ashte'quel, decided to leave and find a new home in the southeast as the city began to become overpopulated. A small group wandered through Wildebeest's Plains, struggling to survive. They were fleeing from lions, hyenas and occasionally theropod dinosaurs and finding water in the barren savannah was difficult.

One night a giant cheetah (Acinonyx pardinensis) came to their camp, and amazingly, unlike the other predators, it was friendly to the travelers and guided them to their new home. It helped them find water, food and safe places to camp.

The journey took 38 days, the exhausted travelers made their way through the Cheetah's Valley to the coast where was the best soil for growing crops and they settled there. But after that the cheetah disappeared and no one ever saw it again.

Travelers mourned over it and in its honour, the Czech artist František Burian named their new home Gepardia and built the statue of that giant cheetah that still stands in the town square today. Since then, in general, the cheetah has become the sacred animal not only of Gepardia, but also of the whole island.

About 380 years later, a queen of Havaykia named Inya Lunabloom proclaimed Gepardia as a town.

Architecture: The architecture is similar from the Middle East and Africa (mainly Morocco, Kenya, Ghana and Tanzania). Thanks to these types of buildings, residents are simply protected from the great summer heat. It's mixed between medieval and modern architecture.

Culture: The culture in Gepardia is diverse since many immigrants are living there. Most of the residents are huge nature enthusiasts and educate the public about conservation. Districts and quarters of the town are named after recently extinct animals from Earth. Festivals such as the Lunar Festival, which is mainly celebrated by night elves and taurens, and the Day of Freedom, which celebrates their liberation from the wars and cruelty of their former homes and worlds.

Cuisine: It is very diverse, but some of the favourites are Asian, Italian and Slovak cuisine. The most popular dish in town is the Slovak dish: Egg-coated bread in several ways.

Religion: It's diverse, but there are mostly atheists and believers who worship Mother Nature. The Night Elves believe that Thansuokria's moon is their goddess Elune from Azeroth, who is watching them. The bodies of the deceased are cremated to ashes, which are placed into urns and placed in underground cemeteries, which some incorrectly call catacombs. In late autumn, relatives of the deceased go to visit their urn. Havaykians believe that souls are indestructible and live forever in their own afterlife world and can travel through all universes freely.

Sport: Badminton and baseball are the town's most popular sports. The National Badminton Championships are organised every year. Gepardia's most famous baseball team is called the Swift Turtles, who have won the National Baseball Three-Week Tournament four times, which is played every three years in the late spring.

Transport: There are no cars in Havaykia, instead there are animals like horses, sabercats and dinosaurs that are suitable for traveling on land. They either are mounted or they pull carriages. In the town they walk on foot or take the train, which has tracks above the ground to avoid accidents. The seas are traveled by boats and ships (obviously). The newest added transport is the subway, which resides underground of the island and travels quickly and safely to distant towns and cities. There is no cost for transportation at all.

Criminality: Although Gepardia has the lowest crime rate on the island, there are still issues. Alcohol, cigarettes and similar drugs are very limited and gambling is strictly illegal in Gepardia. The guardians of the town are called Sentinels, who mostly solve problems like good cops without violence, but are still armed Kaldorei soldiers. Unfortunately since the Assassins and Templars got into Gepardia and the Sentinels were replaced by the Templar Knights, the crime rate has gradually increased as the two factions fight each other there. The prisoners are taken into the capital, where the prison is guarded by the Wardens.

Other informations:

The financial currency in Havaykia are cooper, silver and gold coins.

In general Havaykia and Gepardia strive to enable inhabitants to live a healthy and happy life.

Politicians and civilians are legally equal, and if a politician has extremist views at the polls, they are immediately voted out.

Healthcare is not paid, most doctors work for the passion of helping others, but of course they are paid by the government as long as they do an excellent job.

The maximum working time is 6 hours and 4 people per 24 hours. Taxes and insurance are paid only once a year and surprisingly it is not expensive. Wealthy residents have a so-called financial limit for example they can have a maximum of 100,000 golds and the extra is donated to poorer households and charities. This prevents unemployment and homelessness.

Ads don't exist at all in Havaykia because it's annoying for everyone.

Map and additional information:

Made on Medieval Fantasy City Generator by Watabou

Xerces Blue Butterfly Wood: Meadow park, which is named after an earth-extinct species of blue butterfly. Mostly it is a resting place for locals and tourists, but during the holidays there are festivals.

Nightjar Market District: Named after a small nocturnal bird that just happens to be common on the Earth, but some believe the district is actually named after a critically endangered (potentially extinct) species of nightjar called the Jamaican poorwill (Siphonorhis americana). This is a popular place to shop in the town, where farmers and traders sell their quality goods. There is also an assassin bureau where Altaïr and Malik work.

Thylacine District: Named after the extinct carnivorous marsupial. Although it is the smallest district of the town, the richest residents live there. The isolated building in the south of town was once an orphanage, which later moved into Giant Gecko Quarter. Badminton tournaments will be played in the southern part of the district.

Passenger Pigeon Park: A forest park where there are actually huge flocks of passenger pigeons and other species of pigeons and doves.

Gepardia Fortress: Home to the Mayor and their family who is protected by walls and Sentinels. That's where the lawsuits happen. It's the oldest building in the town.

Giant Gecko Quarter: A quarter named after the largest species of extinct gecko. There are kindergarten to high school, children's hospital and later orphanage.

Golden Toad District: The largest district and named for an extinct toad. There live most of the residents and hotels and pensions for tourists. There are the best restaurants, interesting monuments and a hospital. Naya and her father Mayur are living there.

Baiji Harbour: A harbour named after a possibly extinct freshwater dolphin. Ships transport resources into and from the capital, and tourists travel here. It was at this harbor that the Assassins stepped foot on Havaykia's land for the first time.

Gepardia Museum: It's built in front of the town square and contains the University of Natural Sciences and the administration.

Map in 3D:

Made on City Viewer by Watabou

Mayor Nythelar Evensky:

"This new town is not built for money, power or rulers! But it's only built for its people!"

Nythelar Evensky was born in Falahnaar to a night elf mother and human father. Since childhood he was bullied by the other Kaldorei children since he is half elf and half human, but still he believed that he in one day change society for the better at least somewhere else.

In his early twenties, he moved to Gepardia, where he immediately fell in love with the place. Years later, as Gepardia was becoming a town, he campaigned for mayor. He promised a better future for the residents of the newly formed town, and he won the election as a result. After that he fulfilled all his promises and for that the people of Gepardia respected and loved him.

Only years later, Robert de Sablé and the Templars arrived in the town and warned the mayor of the assassins who planned to kill him and take over Gepardia, heading for a dictatorship. This made Nythelar paranoid and he had no choice but to allow the Templar's guards to patrol the town so that they could protect the civilians while the town Sentinels guarded him in the castle.

Yet he doesn't realize he made a mistake…

[modkatisbacc]

Planned Stories for 2024!

Might as well Try this whole... Schedule thing out for a New Year's Resolution. Below are stories that I am working on/will be working on in the coming year, that will stop being on hiatus and will be updated by me. Or else.

World of Warcraft:

PSTD: My Oc's World of Warcraft story that takes place on an Alternate Azeroth! Canon is OUT the window, and everyone ends up traumatized because of it.

Come Together: The sequel to PSTD, will probably not be a thing until much later next year, since I'm only on chapter 3 of PSTD (Which I'm soft rewriting, I like whatever I did last time for once.)

Death And All His Friends (Viva La Vida): Eventual Fairshaw fic in which both Flynn and Taelia are turned into Death Knights following a tragedy at sea.

After All This Time, It's Still You: Katiann thinks back on the last ten years. (Half completed, two chapters whole moly my second completed fic soon??) Katiann's first sidestory.

Gen:lock:

Time Stands In A Duel (And I Stand For You) *TSIAD for short* My only GL Story currently. I haven't looked at it since I made it and I thought it was horrible, but I got a comment saying they were wondering when I was going to write the next chapter, sooo ITS BACK BABY. Eventually.

The GL Time-Travel fic. Will the gang make things better, or worse? *Not compliant with Season 2*

Ninjago:

The Only Ones: An unpublished fic in progress where Lloyd and Pixal time travel back to the events of season three. We need more Lloyd and Pixal friendship.

An Unlikely Team: The RWBY/Ninjago Crossover. Long before time had a name, Ninjago was besieged by the forces of darkness, creatures of Grimm.

Legend state that the great and powerful Oni had left them behind as a warning that they would truly never be gone from the realm, and have spawned indefinitely for milliennia. In the present, teenagers all over Ninjago are taught how to fight this force of darkness, if they choose to do so.

These monsters go after anyone that are left unguarded, from villages, to towns with no defense. It is now up to the chosen Huntsmen and Huntresses of the next generation to continue this line- or end it once and for all.

HomeScapes: Since I am a horrible human being, I stayed up until past 7 am last night and could not stop thinking about Homescapes. Just a bunch of cute stuff with horror undertones bc It’d be funny if the player character was just the shadowy figure that loomed over everyone and just wanted to help fix stuff, with no one scared or even surprised about you.

To See You Again: Katherine Broom was excited that her childhood best friend (and crush) Austin had returned to town. When she learned that he was trying to restore his childhood home, she dropped everything to help him, even her training to become a protector of nature.

“It’s like you have magic!”

“It’s… not magic… Austin. I’ve just worked with nature and plants all of my life is all.”

It was definitely magic, and you grit your teeth and smile hoping that he doesn’t think anything is up.

You glance at the shadow person that towers over the two of you. They give you a thumbs up.

(Did I add horror elements via the player character? Yeah don’t worry about it)

Original Stories:

WTF, ModKat! Series: A series of strange dreams and or nightmares made into stories.

Let Her Into Your Heart: Your name is Jude, you are twenty-five years old, and every five years on your birthday you run away. From everything. You were on your way to celebrate your birthday when you jumped out of your dad’s car and are now on the run.. but what are you running from?

Subway Killer: You are world renowned investigator, and your biggest case leads you to an abandoned subway tunnel… where you find that the suspect for several murders has been hiding.

[xalatath]

The fact that nightborne look down on night elves for using bows is so funny. Like okay, sure you can use magic. But also guns exist, including fucking Titan-made rifles with laser focus. Motorcycles (but not cars) exist in WoW yet the guards of Stormwind still ride horses. And still no one on Azeroth has invented the toilet yet. Does anything matter

[findmeinshattrath]

It is not acknowledged enough that cars, motorcycles, helicopter, etc. exist in Azeroth

[wyrmguardsecrets]

Not Fairest of Azeroth is just big mad the person she falsely accused of pedophilia is thriving and going to make a welcome community discord while everyone else tries to keep her out. Stay far and away, facetuning scammer with fake car shooting stories <3 you can stay the princess of delulu land.

-

[miqojak]

This is fascinating - literally just a few days ago I was wondering how to broach the topic without sounding like I was being rude (I'm just very direct lol) - I wanted to know what it is about FFXIV that makes people want to be the WoL ICly. I've RP'd longterm in 3 MMOs now, and I've never seen anyone in WoW go and RP as the hero of Azeroth, in GW2 I never saw anyone RP as the commander - it seemed pretty well accepted that there is only one Commander, and we can't all be them (and then it railroads and writes your character's story for you)... though since being on Tumblr I've found a few GW2 blogs that do rp as the Commander, but not many.

So it was a huge culture shock to me when I migrated to FFXIV back in 2019, that... it felt like everyone was the WoL. And for me, a character who fights gods in outer space, among other god-tier feats like time-travel, is far too powerful a character for my people who just live in the world to interact with. And then if so many people are The Warrior of Light, how does that work if you meet more than one ic? Would it restrict who a WoL player could rp with, since so many people are all playing 'Superman'? (Given what the WoL is capable of, in comparison to everyone else, to include killing many 'unkillable' things like immortals from a time before time... Superman seems like an apt comparison. The WoL is more powerful than most could imagine.) Do most people who write a WoL actually just write solo?

For me, I think it's that I want to write something that's wholly mine. MSQ railroads you into specific dialogue and choices and so on - and I like a more low/mid power level person, at that. I know what the WoL's life is like, but what's it like for the little guys just trying not to get hit by cars and eye-beams as Superman saves Metropolis yet again? What's it like to suffer the realities of war, and only hear tales of a hero who can smite gods? Why didn't that hero save you? Having all the god-tier powers of the WoL means that there are basically no more challenges left on the planet for you - you're quite literally the most powerful being in existence on any planet, actually, at this current point in story.

But maybe that hero fantasy is precisely why others love to be the WoL! We all have different tastes, and I was never really into all-powerful Superman type heroes before XIV, either - give me a Spiderman/Batman ( /cough Thancred) any day... the hero who is strong, but can still fail. They're not the strongest, and they have to work with what they've got and figure out how to surmount seemingly impossible odds.

Anywho, this is certainly not a judgement of anyone who writes a WoL - variety is the spice of life, and all that. It's moreso just curiosity - especially given that even GW2's commander is about as god-tier as the WoL (moreso, honestly, for reasons that would de-rail this post), and the story with your NPC party just as/maybe more poignant (sorry Alisaie, you're still #2 next to Taimi! And my literal dragon daughter Aurene...) - yet the RP communities seem to approach the idea of RPing as the main character quite differently!

An informal query

Started wondering about this recently, so figured I'd make a poll to release into the wild! There's a lot of ways to handle the game narrative as a RPer, and also a lot of ways people RP around the game, so I'm curious about people's preferences, and why they handle it the way they do, if anyone's willing to add some thoughts to their vote.

[spartanlocke]

Buckle up, kids, the next two years are gonna be rough.

[ideasvoid]

hi!! is it okay if i ask for wraith, doctor, and shape meeting their s/o who has psychic powers? like the first time they meet their s/o just knocks or breaks their weapon with their mind idk sdfjsdf

Hello hun, absolutely. However as previously stated I do not write for the licensed characters as I feel do not know enough about them to properly convey their characters. But I can do the Wraith and Doctor for you certainly.

A warning for this particular story my loves, Herman Carter is… Herman Carter. And as such please proceed with caution if themes revolving around him such as the implication of torture or medical malpractice, make you uncomfortable. He will be below the cut.

The wraith - Philip Ojomo

Philip watched from a distance, pale eyes watching as you and the gruff one worked on a generator. He hadn’t seen you before, you were new. There had been whispers among the others about a new person around the campfire, that you were special, that you could do things the other ones couldn’t.

Philip wasn’t sure how he felt about such rumours. On one hand it was entirely plausible that they were true, stranger things had happened in the fog. On the other, the realms could at times be so mind numbingly monotonous that everyone - yes, even the killers - would cling to any semblance of something new, no matter how small or potentially untrue.

Still it wouldn’t hurt to have a look for himself, he reasoned. Stepping away from the crushed pile of cars, Philip swiftly moved towards you and raised the wailing bell high. The gruff one stood immediately, attempting to reach for you. Philip struck his shoulder harshly, the sound on bone and metal crushing together filled your ears as the man cried out in pain and decided on running. Philip turned to you, raising Azeroth’s skull high to strike you next - it stopped mere inches from your head. What?

Mud caked eyebrows knitted together, he strained against this… whatever it was. What was happening? Was the entity interfering? Why? You squirmed away quickly, running in the same direction as your teammate and leaving Philip to process what had just happened. He stared at his weapon, the event replaying in his mind over and over. The presence in his mind chittered as if amused, but assured him that she had nothing to do with it.

So they were right, this is what all the fuss was about. Well then, he could make this work.

The Doctor - Herman Carter

Static buzzed along his fingers as he held his hand up, releasing the electricity in a wide burst and listening for a reaction. The usual suspects it would seem- wait, what was that? He charged the energy again and disbursed it, this time in a specific direction. Ah, How delightful! Someone new!! Herman had gotten so very bored of these subjects, the same results over and over but now he had a new plaything. How gracious of his host.

Heavy footsteps on tile echoed through the halls of Lery’s as he made his way towards the scream. He was positively buzzing with excitement, this would be so very fun. He turned a corner, eyes immediately falling on the huddled form tucked not so discreetly behind a pillar. He laughed as he approached you, your eyes wild with confusion and fear.

All alone so quickly, how very unfortunate :)

Herman raised the punishing stick, sparks flying wildly as he swung it down. The doctor hissed through his teeth as the spiked weapon was knocked from his hand, clattering loudly against the cracked tile floors. White eyes shot back to you as he held his wrist in shock, well this was certainly a change of pace. Had his host stepped in? No, no… it wasn’t nearly so subtle. No, this had come from you.

How very exciting.

If it were possible, Herman’s smile would have widened. Psychic powers, he had seen them in others of his ilk but never from the patients. He wanted nothing else than to crack that pretty little head of yours open and see what made you tick, what anomaly made you capable of such things. Flexing his hand he stood tall again, his signature laugh bouncing off the walls. “Well aren’t you a special treat-”

Static surged and released into your brain, pulling a loud shriek from you. “I’ll be sure to pay extra attention to you.” You scrambled back, tripping over yourself as you began to flee. You could certainly try, it only made the process more difficult for you even if it was more enjoyable for him. The metal stick scrapped against the floor as he picked it up, knuckles turning white from his hold.

Herman loved his job. And you would be his absolute favourite patient.

[vaard]

Logically speaking as someone who knows WoW and FFXIV; A) it is absolutely possible in the canon of ffxiv - courtesy of the SB expansion and then ShB - and the whole 'multiple planets' spiel in wow; that Eorzea exists somewhere in the universe of Azeroth and the reverse too. B) It is 100% ALSO possible for Draenei Vaard to have gone to Eorzea, pretended to be an Au'ra that is just Very Big™, and then used a fantasia potion to turn into a Hyur. No matter what; Vaard is wonderful.

Thanks! I haven't done much with the crossover events aside from getting the 4 seater car, but it is a fun thought to think about.

I got a chuckle out of a "Very Big™" Au'ra.

[trixcuomo]

Trixany and her Goblin step sister grappled viciously for that arclight spanner. After a time, Trixany realized that her sister really meant it. The sometimes very ghetto Coco was fully ready to bash her sister Trixany's head in and send her first classless to the Shadowlands via death if she had to win their argument that way. Coco flared, "Selfish! Yer givin' the Cuomos a bad name, too!"

"Stop!! What do you want me to do, Coco? Give up all this?! The cars, the money, the mansion..." Then Trixany shrieked, "The man?!!"

Coco snarled back, through her violet painted lips, "What man? Does he really appreciate you? Sig Nicious is never here with you!"

Trixany slammed her boot heel into Coco's wrist. The spanner went flying and clanged against the far wall.

"Arghhh! I'll sue!"

"And I'll sue for defamation!"

"And I'll counter sue for... for being a delusional bitch! One who has terrible theme music!"

"Coco! You take that back, my Sally Whitemane Iggy Azalea spoof was amazing!"

"It stinks!!! Siggy even hated to see you in that video!"

Trixany rolled away and ran to brace herself behind the dask. Coco charged after, but Trixany ran around the desk when Coco tried to barrel under it, since she was shorter.

"Why...do you keep bringing up... Siggy?" Trixany leaned over the desk and gasped, breathless.

"Because you want a man who likes the real you. And this... this ain't it, sis." Coco hopped onto the desk and sat, also tired out. "At the end of the day, he can't be what you really want. And before you say anything else! I can prove it."

Trixany pulled out a chair. Then she eyed her short, green step sister and dragged it halfway across the room, where it was safe.

"How are you going to prove it?"

Coco eyed Trixany. "Someone we both know and love-to-hate offered Sig Nicious a lot of money to walk out of your life for good. And, he took it. I hate that you have to find out this way. But that's why Sig has been gone."

Trixany sat there. She stared. "Sunthraze... he bribed my Siggy?"

Quiet at last.

Then, in a small voice, Trixany wondered, "What part of the Sally Whitemane music video put Sig off me for good?"

"Eh, it was the part when you joked about--"

"Groping Bolvar?"

Coco shook her head.

"Retconning Arthas?"

Coco sighed, "If only he were just an Arthas fanboy. But that didn't get him in the end. Trixy... He secretly wanted to get out. There were plans on the dark net circulatung that he was going to shitpost you, feign innocent, and then break up with you. Amid the social media fallout, Siggy figured he wouldn't look like the bad guy in that case. Sunthraze stepped in before that happened."

"Sig was going to shitpost me how?"

"To say... to say you were secretly a scarlet. That you wanted to BE Sally Whitemane."

"But I'm a parody artist. I would never..." Trixany could not finish. It went against everything she believed in. Blood knight, singer, everything.

Coco walked over and clicked a few buttons on the dark console. Faked images of Trixany in all sorts of Scarlet Inquisition uniforms, at several camps around Azeroth appeared on the screen. Fake articles, fake footage even.

"That isn't me. I was never there for any of that."

"Yeah, rumor has it Sig Nicious is also runnin' an AI startup company on the side."

"What? He's so evil!"

"Yeah, it's tragic..." Coco went over, bent down and picked up her spanner. She swatted it in her other hand a few times. "Ya know, sis? When he left you here unexpectedly, he sure did also leave a lot of nice, expensive, smashable stuff behind. How about we say goodbye to this old lifestyle. The Kezan way."

Trixany was devastated. She looked forlorn and empty. "It wouldn't be right."

"What if I said Sunthraze was right outside in Sig's best goblin limo, waitin' with the engine runnin?"

"A getaway car?"

"We'll mess up Haris' place next. She went to join him at his private house on Quel'danas Isle ya know."

Trixany seethed. "Alright. But first? Play my song. Full. Fuggin' blast."

Little Sally Whitemane walkin down the aisle.

She kept wipin my raid, so I listened for a while.

I said g'wan girl, rez your man, rez your man, drop.

G'wan girl rez your man, rez your man, stop!

"Sing it louda sis!!"

"I'm the scourge of the Scourge because, no one does it like Trixy does!!"

And then both Cuomo sisters smashed through a stained glass window of the Elite Tauren Chieftans. In a dramatic rain of glass shards, framed by curled, bent steel, and for some reason flames, Trixany walked side by side with her Goblin sister, away from her fake life.

Forever.

-fin-

Love Games

Up next on Desperate Alts’ Lives… Horde B celebrity Trixany Cuomo has finally pulled the lever to A-status, and now it’s like she’s fallen down into a black rabbit hole of gossip and dangerous glam, chasing her dreams. Is this it? Has Trix finally gone too far? One of her friends must be able to save her, but which are the right friends? Haris Pilton? Sig Nicious? Her Night Elf buddy Sharpen? Hopeless causes tend to want dark angels…

Jet black. Haris Pilton thought her once rival in all things, business, modeling, performing, climbing the Silvermoon City social ladder—Trixany Cuomo, soon to be Mrs. Sig Nicious—that Trixany would go with red for her own gossip closet. A cheery, and also dangerous color. But when they were done looking through Haris’s swatches months ago, under their new starlette truce of course, Trixany wanted her gossip closet in complete, knockout black.

Today, Trixany’s hand was on the lever, she just hadn’t pulled it yet this morning. First, she needed to gather all her targets. Haris’ pink knob was honestly so… odd. But Trixany chose a literal disco stick that reminded her of one of her favorite performers of all time. The part at the top was a classic disco ball with large tiles of glossy silver. The effect was going to take over the whole room whenever she was ready to ‘pull the lever!’ The first time she’d done it at Haris’ place was so fun, it was addicting. Yes, so wonderfully addicting.

Trixany crossed legs in her matching leather catsuit. The worker Gnomes with jumpsuits also piped in silver along the smart curves of their bodies? Still asleep. Trixany liked to get up before even they did.

She sat alone inside of the shell at the center of the room. Well, it was raised up for now, or else she wouldn’t be able to see or hear anything. The noise-cancelling, black ASMR shell-that-was-totally-not-like-any-other-famous-villain’s-personal-sanctuary-globe-thing-for-legal-reasons had its uses, just not right now. STNLAOFVPSGTLR or Stan’s Laff Vapors Get’er was a fascinating piece of technology engineered for relaxing starlettes exclusively. So it was perfect for a certain Horde B celebrity. Gotta love quirky Gnomish technology. The laugh vapors weren’t working so at the moment. They were also supposed to help her forget her stressors. Running low… White steam raised from the top of the shell and escaped through the gear-like teeth around the edges, wafting to the ceiling.

Gnomish technology to make you think, ten times, twenty times faster. Consider your options and get maybe twelve moves ahead of your opponent before they’re even out of bed, or grabbed their champagne brunch around 2 pm server… It was like farming for rares, from home, fast, and on felweed! But it was your frenemies you were felling.

Anyway…

Keep reading

[talesofnovembria]

👥👥👥!!!!

Send 👥 for a headcanon relating to both of our muses

Since their first time doing it, bashing cars in the junkyard is something Salena and Arthur do together, whether it be to relieve stress, because they're angry, or for whatever reason they just need to hit something. It's not exclusive to one person. Arthur or Salena could be the one upset and it's just something they suggest to the other as an activity. Having drinks and pizza is the cherry on top to this type of outing.

Because Arthur is more familiar with Azeroth than any of her other friends, she finds talking to him about some of her experiences is easier since he would have some context as to what is going on. It gives him a bit more of a higher level of understanding, and can help ease the confusion with others in the group.... and point out when something is a bit of a sore subject.

Since out of their core friend group, they're the only two that are not dead, and actually need to eat and sleep to function. In the case of no sleep, for whatever reason if both of them are up and they are at the same place, they hang out. They may watch movies, talk, or Arthur will show her some more modern stuff that she'll get confused over.

[merinnan]

Fic First Lines

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line, then tag 10 of your favourite authors!

Tagged by @mejomonster and @foxofninetales for the 8 and 20 line one, so combing them into one. Thank you both! 💖💖💖

I’m going to go with written date, rather than posted date, since I recently moved a bunch of old fics onto AO3. This means I’ll also be including some fics that are at least half written, but not yet posted.

Where I’ve co-written fics, I’m only including the ones where I wrote the first line, as far as I can remember, since it’s also asking about patterns in your own writing.

*

1. Living With Inlaws (DMBJ Liu Sang Week fic co-written with @xantissa):  Game over, read the message on the cell phone screen, and Liu Sang sighed and tossed it onto the couch next to him.

2. As-yet-untitled Liu Sang Week fic (DMBJ):  The smell of gasoline was everywhere - overpowering the musty carpet smell, seeping into his clothes, wafting through his hair, burning the back of his nose, his throat, with every panicked breath he took.

3. The Zhang Identity (DMBJ):  For all that the bright streetlights weren’t that far away, it was dark where he staggered, burning with pain and the desperate need to get away from his followers.

4. Cats and Dogs (DMBJ):  Liu Sang huddled further underneath the chassis of the car he was pressed up against, shaking his head in an attempt to clear the ringing from his ears.

5. Silent Graves (DMBJ):  When the grave was first built and occupied, it was very busy.

6. Those who fear darkness have never seen what light can do (DMBJ):  Wu Sanxing crouched down beside the new hole that his people were digging out despite the pouring rain and darkness.

7. Nevermore (MDZS/CQL):  Just before their sixteenth birthdays Jiang Cheng’s adopted brother, Wei Wuxian, came charging into his room, waving a printout of the article announcing both the program, and that recruitment was now open.

(this one is also an exception - this is not the first line, but is the first line I wrote. This is a Pacific Rim fusion, and the first few lines of the fic are taken from the movie)

8. It's a lovely day in the tomb, and Yóu is a horrible shibie (DMBJ):  It's a lovely day in the tomb, and Yóu is a horrible shibie.

9. Stars fall like diamonds (DMBJ):  The first time it happened, Zhang Qiling wasn’t entirely surprised.

10. The Cats Travesty (Guardian): It all started because of the reviews.

11. Blanket Forts are the Best Wingmen (MDZS/CQL): Not for the first time that day, Lan Xichen looked around the utter disaster area that was his living room and wondered just what the hell he was doing.

12. The Rescue Job (Guardian): If anyone had asked Zhao Yunlan this morning how he thought this day would go, kissing Shen Wei would not have even been suggested.

13. Untitled post-canon fic (Guardian):  It was hurting again. 

14. Operation Make Lan Zhan Remember (MDZS/CQL):  Supervising a day trip for a busload of five-year-olds had not been Lan Wangji’s plan for the day when he woke up this morning, and yet, here he was.

15. Qinghe Jue (MDZS/CQL):  Pain. His entire world was pain. 

16. Do You Want To Have A Blanket Fort? (MDZS/CQL):  It looked like it had been a bright, beautiful day – at least, that’s what was promised by the golden sunlight that crept around the edges of the curtains on his bedroom window.

17. A Court of Azeroth and Prythian (A Court of Thorns and Roses / World of Warcraft):  Water filled his lungs as a falling cannon collided with him, causing him to gasp involuntarily despite himself.

18. The Falls of Mercury and Zoisite (Sailor Moon) (2001):  In the velvety darkness of night two people stood on one of the balcony's of a graceful palace, looking at a blue-green planet in the sky.

19. The Death of Zoisite (Sailor Moon) (2000-2001?):  The swirling sakura petals settled around Kunzite's feet as he stood silently.

20. Endings and Beginnings (DS9) (2000):  “Adami! Adami, listen to me!”

*

Patterns, hmm. I have a tendency to start in media res, from the looks of these, and almost always start with either action or some kind of description, rather than dialogue.

Favourite line... I have a few favourites here. The Rescue Job and Operation Make Lan Zhan Remember in particular both amuse me greatly, and pretty much all of the first lines of the recent (within the past year) fics are ones that would have me keep reading for at least the rest of the paragraph to see if the rest of the fic would keep me as engaged.

Tagging... whoever would like to do this, as I can’t remember who has already done it!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #400

“it’s an age-old story: the first will be last, and the last will be kings  /  the small will be great, and the great will be weak”

Who was the last person you sincerely thanked? My mom; I thank her every time she cooks for me/us, and I really do mean it. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed as a guest at someone’s house? Somewhere around a month. What was the last thing to really surprise you? My brother has a fiancee and is having another son! :') Have you ever found out that you have been sleep walking? No. Have you ever tried making something from one of those short cooking videos? How did it turn out? No. Have you ever written a review for a product you bought online? No. What was the last thing you had the urge to do? Idk about anything notable. Is there anyone you feel that takes you for granted? No. What is the last thing you had a craving for? A donut. Do you ever read the comments on social media posts? Sometimes. What was the last thing you felt like you wasted money on? It's so rare that I buy things with my own cash that I really don't know. What was the last thing you wanted to buy, but couldn’t afford? Venus' terrarium on my own. Mom has to help me with buying it. What is a recipe you’d like to try to make for yourself? I don’t cook, so. What goes through your mind when you look back at old photographs of yourself? More than anything, I get sad over how much weight I've gained. I was so healthy once upon a time. It also just makes me miss my childhood. What was the subject matter of the last email you sent? I believe it was about setting up an appointment with my therapist. How do you get your news? Facebook articles, really. What do you think about lizards? I love them! I was that kid that always tried to catch them when I saw 'em. Now I just observe because I don't want to terrify them by trying to pick them up. Have you ever done consumer testing (testing products before they come out on the market)? If not, would you ever want to? No, but sure, I'd do it. Have you ever received anesthesia or morphine? Both. The time I received morphine, it did jack-all for me. If you had to choose which video game to be in, which would it be? Hmmm... I would say Azeroth from World of Warcraft, but too much shit goes down, ha ha. Perhaps the top of the temple in Shadow of the Colossus? So long as I could have someone I love with me, I'd be in Heaven. Although... I doubt there's WiFi there, so I might drop that answer, lmfao. I really don't know. Between the two, would you rather live in a place where it’s only night or where it’s only day? Day. I need the natural light of day sometimes, and if I wanted to sleep, I could just find shade. If you had to be an actor/actress in a movie, what genre of the movie would you be best at? Fantasy. Out of fire, earth, water, wind, light, and dark, which element appeals the most to you? Dark. What’s one thing that you wish was real? Friendly dragons, haha. Is there anything (show, comedian, etc.) that you constantly quote or make references to? No. What’s your favorite Disney Channel movie? I have absolutely no idea. I don't even remember almost any of them. What’s your favorite holiday? Christmas. Do you ever have to do yard work? No. Do you have any live versions of songs in your music software? Yes. Did/do you listen to Britney Spears songs? Yeah, sometimes. I genuinely don't mind her. Do you still make Christmas lists? Yeah, because I'm asked to. Do you watch the show Dexter? Never seen it. Which musical instrument do you think sounds the prettiest? I'm torn between the violin, harp, and piano. Is your mom or dad the older parent? Mom, by a year. Do you and your parents like any of the same bands/singers? A lot, actually. Is there any food in your bedroom? What? I have these tictacs I keep in my purse in case of a dry mouth. Medication makes me have that severely, and my psychiatrist recommended me to always have a hard candy available to suck on since it forces salivation. Do you know anyone who has road rage? Who? My younger sister, badly. How far away do your grandparents live from you? They're all dead, but they lived in far away states. Do you know anyone who wants to be the president one day? No. What kinds of chips are in the cupboards? None. It's a bad idea to keep chips in this house, haha. Do you have your mom's or dad's hair? Well, I was born with dirty blonde hair like my dad, but my hair is thick and more similar in color now to my mom's before the cancer completely drained the color. If you were going out with your celebrity crush, what would you wear? OH MY GOD LA;KSDJFAKLWJE I DON'T KNOW I LOOK AWFUL IN EVERYTHING. Have you ever cried when a teacher retired? Teared up, yes, multiple times. Do you swear and yell while playing video games? I might swear under my breath, but that's the extent of it. If you were adopted, would you want to know? At this point in my life, I don't really know. I kinda find myself leaning towards no. Has a best friend ever ditched you for a girlfriend/boyfriend? Pretty much. Do your pets chase after bugs? Roman sure does. When’s the last time you were so excited you couldn’t sleep? Why? I want to say that was the night before I was getting my tattoo redone. Do you own any flip-flops? Yeah, considering they're like... all I wear, ever. Did you ever really believe that the stork brought babies? I don't believe so, no. Have you ever had a dream about sleeping with a celebrity? (You don’t have to give details.) It was the only lucid dream I've ever had and I'm not complaining about it lmao. Have you ever had a dream that upset you or made you cry? Oh I'm sure. Has anyone ever told you that they needed you? Do you think they meant it? Not to my recollection, no, and I don't believe you should ever adopt that mentality and say that to someone. Do you own a laser? No. Is there anything you like to put on a sandwich, that some might find odd? Nah. I do enjoy a layer of potato chips on some sandwiches, like ham and cheese, but I know that's like an actual thing some people just like. What colour are the shoes you wear most often? They're black flip-flops. When was the last time you were required to put on a mask? In the morning when I go to the TMS office. And what colour was the last mask you wore? It's one of those normal blue and white medical ones. The last time you were in a queue, what were you waiting for? To see the woman who would give me my APAP mask. Have you had your Covid vaccine yet? Which one, if you have? Yes, Moderna. If you've had your vaccine, did you experience any side effects? None for the first shot, but my second shot bruised badly and I felt seriously shitty the following day. I was perfectly fine afterwards, though. Can any of your friends sing well? Which one has the nicest singing voice? Sara has an AMAAAAAAAAAAAZING voice. When was the last time you wore make-up, if ever? What shades/colours? I don't even remember, but I'm sure it would've been black. What is something that seems popular, but doesn't interest you personally? Fashion, various TV shows, etc... Are you clumsy or graceful? I am STUPID clumsy. Like it's just ridiculous. Do you like gloves? I like fingerless gloves. Does your sibling(s) have braces? My older sister did as a kid. Do you ever say "OMG" in person? No; it's a random pet peeve of mine, "Internet talk" irl. What was the last thing your parents got mad at you for? Dad, no idea. Mom, uhhhh. Not "mad," but "annoyed" probably better fits how she felt about me leaving the heating pad I use for my cramps on the floor. Do your pets have favorites? I'm definitely Roman's favorite seeing as he is my literal shadow, and I'd assume Venus trusts me more than anyone else, but realistically, she's in contact with almost no one else, so. Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Why did you break up? The first guy to have the title of "boyfriend" was Aaron, and I broke up with him 'cuz I just wasn't as romantically into him as I thought I might be. It was puppy-dog love, and I feel I knew that. My first *real* boyfriend was Jason, who broke up with me because my mental illnesses began to affect his wellbeing. Which I now accept is fine, but he seriously coulda gone about things differently... When was the last time you got a new bed? Is your bed comfy? Late into my teenage years; idk the exact age and don't feel like doing the math. Teddy kept peeing on the bed to where it was just unrecoverable and needed to be thrown away. My current bed is comfy enough. What kind of games did you play on the playground when you were younger? My absolute favorite was digging tunnels in the sandbox, pretending to be a meerkat. The only trend I ever created, haha, seeing as my classmates got into it with me, allowing us to make huge tunnel systems. It was really cool. I also liked playing 4 Square (which I now don't even remember the details of) on the basketball court. Do you remember the first time you ever drove a car? Who were you with? Yeah, my driver's ed instructor and the guy who was on the same route as me. What’s your favorite thing to do when drunk? Would you do this sober? N/A Are you a fan of dogs? Do you have any as pets? I'm picky with dogs. I like interacting with any dog, but I don't plan on ever owning another. I don't like how hyper they can be, and I prefer more independent pets, like cats. Basically, I'll be hyped to meet a random dog on the street and give it some loving, but I don't want to take it home to be my own. Are you an elitist (even a little bit) when it comes to anything? What? No. I cannot stand elitists. Is just being fond of something enough, or does it take more than that to be a ‘real fan’? And I hate gatekeeping in fandoms even more. There are varying intensities of "being a fan," but regardless, if you like something, congratulations, you're a valid, "real" fan. What type of fabric is most comfortable for clothing? I don't pay attention to this, honestly. If you wear one – bras with or without a wire? I'll wear either, but without is way more comfortable. If you wear one – are you able to find cute bras in your size? God no. What length do you like your shorts to be? I don’t wear shorts. What was the last disappointing movie you saw? Warcraft, but not because it was bad. I've talked before how in the theater, the orcs' voices were just so fucking baritone that I couldn't understand almost ANYTHING they said. Kinda ruined the experience for me. What was the last disappointing book you read? Don't recall. Do you ever watch compilation videos? Of what? Very rarely. If I do, they're mostly of animals being silly. Favorite Disney character who isn’t royalty? Probably Dory, but idk. There's WAY too many options to fish through.

[thalsianiii]

A few questions for the master summoner. How do warlocks commit demons into their service? Do they have to talk them into it like used car salesmen or do the demons generally benefit from such bonds and come willingly?

Some demons need to be convinced, some need to be bought, some need to be enslaved, and some are willing participants. It entirely depends on the demon, the warlock, and a myriad of factors between them.

How accomplished and powerful is the warlock attempting the summoning? An apprentice trying to summon a succubus may end up finding themselves enthralled and made a slave instead. Or a summoning may simply fail if the warlock in question doesn’t have enough power to force something to answer their call. What does the warlock in question have to bargain with? Do they have access to magical items? A promise of excitement and chaos? A huge dick? What do you, as a warlock, have to offer?

You also need to consider the demon being summoned. Some love coming to Azeroth just to fuck with whatever the warlock is fucking with. Others simply dislike mortals and need to be convinced that working with one is worth their time. Some are simply too powerful and too stubborn to submit and must be bound by force. Or many other possibilities.

It’s my experience that a willing companion is far more powerful and valuable than one that is being forced to submit.

That said, just because a demon says no to your offer doesn’t mean you have to listen. You’re a summoner and binder of demons, not a bitch. If it’s not freely given, then take it by force.