#and cannot comprehend the Jedi perspective that Death may not be truly the 'end' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

the-far-bright-center · 2 years ago

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"Everywhere he looked, he saw only the face of the woman he loved beyond love: the woman for whom he channeled through his body all the love that had ever existed in the galaxy. In the universe."

The fact that his dreams are telling him specifically that Padme will die in childbirth makes this all the more cruel and unbearable from Anakin's perspective. He was genuinely happy to hear the news that she was expecting a child...their child. He already loves the baby and wants it, welcomes it. This beautiful, miraculous result of their Love. But now the Force is telling him that THIS is what is going to kill her? Anakin is the father, after all...so that means it's his doing. Padme is pregnant because of him. So, in his mind, if he cannot prevent his visions from coming true, then it's his fault. Simply by loving her, he'll have been her death.

“And now felt her, really felt her in the Force, as though she could have been some kind of Jedi, too, but more than that: he felt a bond, a connection, deeper and more intimate than he’d ever had before with anyone, even Obi-Wan; for a precious eternal instant he was her … he was the beat of her heart and he was the motion of her lips and he was her soft words as though she spoke a prayer to the stars— I love you, Anakin. I am yours, in life, and in death, wherever you go, whatever you do, we will always be one. Never doubt me, my love. I am yours. —and her purity and her passion and the truth of her love flowed into him and through him and every atom of him screamed to the Force how can I let her die? - Matthew Stover’s Revenge of the Sith

#this is Anakin Skywalker we're talking about #the man for whom every loss he experiences is shattering #and for which he always blames himself #and now he's faced with something he fears truly IS his fault #and he can do nothing to stop it #in many respects Anakin's struggle is a crisis of Faith #he has never been able to accept the part of the Code that says 'Death yet the Force'#and cannot comprehend the Jedi perspective that Death may not be truly the 'end'#the first time he saw someone die he was only three years old #a fellow slave was blown up in front of his eyes #he saw that person 'end'#so from a young age there was no 'yet the Force' from his perspective #all he knows is the anxiety and terror of separation #the Fear of Loss that is real and present in him every day #'the dragon of that dead star'#all he knows is that his dreams come true and his mother died #that he was too late to prevent her death #he's convinced the Jedi have secret knowledge they are keeping from him #and it's partly because of the Jedi's mantra that he thinks the higher ranking Jedi must know something he does not #but then the Jedi imply they don't trust *him* enough to let him in on it #that's where Sidious comes in #'when the Devil lends a helping hand he grabs it like its sacred land'#the irony is that since Anakin was created *by* the Force #his struggle with his faith in the Force is in many respects a struggle with his (lack of) faith in *himself*#he cannot accept mortality (which is part of having true 'faith' or belief in the Force)#and he's never really cared about being 'the Chosen One'#all he wants is to be with the ones he loves #and in this moment the one he loves above ALL is dying #and he thinks it's HIS FAULT

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