#and by shit I mean take a showrr

[j4r-of-flies]

Fuck procrastination

[luvuwite]

all, go

i hate you

1. What was the last present you gave?

uMMMM probably a commission i gave to pancake (archie/vivi)

 2. What was the last present you received? 

i dunno? if its a doodle then i got that a week back!

3. What animal best represents your personality? 

from the oOoOO spirit animal tests i took im a snek

4. What are you most afraid of? 

sometimes my own mind EYES EMOJI

5. Who is your favourite villain? 

HMMMMMMM probably like,, megamind i love him

6. Who is your favourite family member? (we all have one, admit it)

MY SISTERRRR

7. If you could name your own planet what would it be called? 

myanus

8. Stars or Moon? 

stars!!

9. Do you have/want kinds? 

if my other partner wants them, sure

10. What is your greatest life goal? 

making it this far

11. What is something you can’t live without? 

soup

12. What is a place you associate with your childhood? 

one of the parks near the store-area

13. How was your first kiss/how would you like your first kiss to go? 

i never kissed, so i wouldn’t know, but pls,,,ask for consent,,, and warn me if we gonna kiss or not,,,,,

14. What is some life advice you have acquired? 

ive learned a lil’ bit, but one of em probably has to be to just be like,, dont cry over something you know is fake, at least thats what i remember atm HAHA

15. Who in history has influenced you? 

bruh i dont like history idk

16. What is something strange that you think about often? 

h,,,hopless romantic noISIJEIORQ AHHAHA i like to think about weird scenarios in my head basically

17. Baths or Showers? 

showrr i get shy with myself in baths

18. Tea of Coffee? 

coffee

19. Alcohol or soft drink? 

alchohol bad brisk brisk brisk

20. Writing or typing? 

typing since its easier

21. What is you most favourite thing in your bedroom? 

my bed its sexy and comfy

22. Spontaneous holiday! Where are you going and with who? 

wait what UH I DONT KNOW probably just close close friends and family

23. Introverted or Extraverted? 

i have my moments with both

24. Describe yourself in two words. 

small and aggressive

31. What do you think of when you hear ‘portrait’? 

a picture or image of someone/something

32. Tell me about your partner/ideal partner? 

i mean no one is perfect yeah? i just want them to be honest with me and accept my AHEM struGGLES with relationships since im not the best partner

33. Tell me about your siblings, if you have any? 

my sister is what you call a “girly girl”, she likes disney movies, outdoors, being loud and running around, yknow just like any other child ever

35. What are you a big advocate for? 

my friends!!

36. If you’re comfortable to answer, what is the sickest you have ever been?

migraine + stomach bug + mental in trash +  stomach pains + lil appendix pain

37. When were you the most scared in your life? 

when i broke my arm

38. Ever had a paranormal experience? 

ACTUALLY YEAH i thought i heard someone yelling help outside my window and i peaked out and realized it was nothing and i figured i was just tired but i was still kinda freaked

39. Biggest celebrity crush at the moment? 

im not like other girls,,,,....

40. What is something happening in your life right now? 

uhhh just general anxiousness/paranoia(?) tbh

41. What is your favourite mythological creature? 

DRAAAAGOOOOOON

42. Marvel or DC?

dont know what those are

43. What object would be on your family’s banner? 

soup

44. Favourite flower? 

pink rose

45. One characteristic you like in a partner? 

s,,,support/reassurance pls

46. What planet/star would you travel to if it were possible? 

i wanna,,,, actually i dont know i think i would just enjoy floating around in general 

47. What is your favourite meal… ever? 

soup

48. First time…. doing anything. Describe your first time doing something? 

first time i drew was twiggit sperkl and that was the most proudest i ever felt

49. Who is your favourite superhero? 

bRUHHH I DUNNO I DONT WATCH THAT STUF

50. What is your favourite poem? Recite it?

i dont read

51. What is an exercise you despise doing. 

burpees

52. Secret talent? 

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

fite

53. Current song on replay replay replay? 

[x]

55. If you weren’t in your current occupation what would you be doing? 

sleeping probably

56. What is the first thing you notice about the person you fancy?

,,y,yo they kinda,,,, scrumptious,,, AHUIWRWQI 

57. If you had one wish that would definitely come true, what would it be? 

yes

58. If you could time travel, when and where would you visit? 

i would go to future bc i wanna see what i look like

59. What is your lucky number? 

5

60. If you adopt a pet what would it be and what would you name it? 

a cat!! and i actually am planning a name and calling them clementine!! 

61. Do you believe in fate/everything happens for a reason?

i believe your fate is decided by ur own actions/words

 62. What is your favourite thing about your personality? 

im not too hard to get along with,, i hope

63. What is your favourite thing about your appearance? 

uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

64. What is your favourite clothing store? 

primark bc everything is like 2 bucks

65. What is your favourite online store? 

i dont do online shopping too much

66. Use one word to describe your most favourite person? 

observant 

67. How do you usually have your hair?

down with a clip, then ponytail next day

 68. What was your favourite subject in high school? 

math

69. What makes you feel empowered? 

power over something/someone(as a joke/in games, not in a bad way)

70. What motivates you to do something? 

a prize at the end

71. What advice would you give someone who is going through a rough time? 

it gets worse before it gets better, and in the worse ill be there for you so you dont have to go through this alone

72. Ideal date? 

wendys!!! sweater weather!!! cuddle!!! left 4 dead!!! comfy clothes!!!

73. What is the best date night movie? 

i am not that attractive to be taken out on a date

74. What is something you are currently looking forward to? 

nothing atm tbh im just here bc i have to beIEOJRWIOE

75. Tell me a funny joke? 

oo wa oh wa ooh

76. Do you like musicals? If so, what’s your favourite? 

never listened to one actually

77. What is your favourite song currently? 

sweater weather. always.

78. What song never fails to make you dance? 

POP EYED JOEEEEE IVE BEEN LIVING???? LONG TIME YOOO

79. What is your favourite “classic?”

gnomeo and juliet

 80. What is the best advice you have ever been given? 

obese paragraph and comfort doodles? lets go

81. Where did you ancestors come from? 

puerto rico

82. What have you learned from your parents/guardians? 

be tough nugget and dont take shit seriously till you have to

83. What is a phrase you heard a lot growing up? 

dont step on the crack or youll break ur mothers back

84. Do you believe in magic? 

nnno

85. What reminds you of your best friend? 

overwatch

86. What are you passionate about? 

dance dance dance

87. Tell me a story from middle school? 

one time

the end

88. Who was your favourite teacher and why?

i love my bio teacher rn bro shes such a sweetheart

 89. Can you roll your tongue? 

yes

90. What made you pursue what you are studying? (including school subjects) 

my little pony

91. Where would you like to travel to? 

japan for those toys gimme gimme

92. What is something on your bucket-list? 

i wanna see coral reef

93. What is home to you? 

place that brings feeling of comfort/security

94. What do you do in your free time? 

draw

95. If you could buy anything right now, what would it be? 

food

96. If you could see anyone, living or dead, right now, who would it be? 

probs one of my online friends

97. If you could choose, what would your last meal be? 

soup dumplings brisk and rice

98. How would you like to die? 

happy

99. List five of your favourite pieces of art (paintings, books, songs etc) 

ruby eyes / sweater weather / ponyo / wall-e / idk

100. What would you change about this world?

global warming SHOOO U FAT

[ilyftnotuber]

I low-key hate my aunt. She treats my mom like shit. Everytime my mom has to go somewhere she has to ask my aunt to take her and my aunt always acts like my mom owes her because of it. And also my aunt always makes my mom watch my cousin and makes her work when my mom has a headache or got Botox. Then she gets mad at my mom when she tries to prevent my cousin from grabbing something because “she’s just trying to explore” and my mom was charging her phone one day and my cousin kept trying to grab the cord so my mom put it under a pillow so she couldn’t get it and It broke so my aunt found out and was like “I can’t believe you broke the charger I have to charge my phone so now you have to give me your other charger” even though that charger was my mom’s charger and my aunt has three in her room.And my mom said “well I was trying to prevent Riley from unplugging my phone” and my aunt was like “dont you dare blame my daughter for your mistake you should’ve tried harder to keep Riley away instead of letting it break'And Everytime my mom is charging her phone my aunt unplgs it an plugs in hers. And Everytime my mom wants to take a shower or do laundry my aunt is like "noi have to showrr” or “no I have to bathe Riley” or “no I have to do my laundry” and that means my mom doesn’t shower for weeks.And my aunt gets mad when things aren’t perfect and clean but she leaves my cousins toys in the living room for people to trip on.And she gets upset when my room isn’t perfect and I spent 7 hours cleaning my room last weekend and it wasn’t good enough for her.And she treats my mom like shit and yells at her an causes issues between My stepdad and mom and everything is my cousin and my cousin is the center of the universe. And she doesn’t even pay to live here. And she’s always saying I’m self entitled and I don’t behave and my mom needs to parent me better and yesterday at dinner I toldmy mom she was the best mom ever and my aunt said “yeah because any other mom would’ve killed you already because you’re so crazy and you disbehave too much "And I’m sorry but that hurts???And we can’t even kick her out BC she has to live with family

[outerspaceman]

—

there’s nothing quite like having an oc/d induced anxiety attack at 6 am that’s been building for the last two and a half hours bc i pay over 10k a year to live on campus that basically induces anxiety from oc/d on a daily fucking basis

i just want to take a shower and i’ve been trying to take a shower for two and a half hours now but apparently the heaters down again or they just manually shut off the hot water in the middle of the night bc i know for a damn fact there’s not enough people taking a shower between 3:30 and 6am for the water to be straight ass freezing

my skin literally cannot handle that cold water. that will seize up my entire body and i’ve already started the “getting ready to take a shower” ritual which means i can’t put on my clothes, i can’t lay down on my bed, i can’t i can’t i can’t

therefore i can’t go to sleep until i’m able to take a shower and the fact that i can’t take one is stressing me out so badly rn i’m to the point of crying and i feel like i can’t breathe

please dear god give me like fucking 15 minutes please just let me showrr i have class and a therapy appt today and my body hasn’t been able to digest anything in three days again and i’m afraid it’s going to be january all over again

i still can’t go to the doctors i don’t know what’s wrong with me anymore i just want to sleep i can’t handle my thoughts anymore

i think one of the worst things about this is the fact that i can’t handle this shit alone anymore

i have no one to talk to i have no one to help i don’t have anyone to listen

i can’t handle this shit alone anymore i can’t handle my life alone anymore i feel so lonely and isolated that i feel it with my entire life in all of my bones in my soul

i need someone who actually cares i need someone who actually would honest to god care if i was gd dead who actually wants to make sure i’m okay someone who doesn’t just ignore me the second i’m vaguely difficult bc i’m a human being with real emotions just like everyone else

i’m so tired of doing every single day, every single moment, every single thing in my life alone, alone, ALONE all the time, constantly

i shouldn’t have to force myself into friendships, i shouldn’t have to force people to care, i shouldn’t have to spend every waking moment worrying and worrying and worrying about when they’re going to drop the ball and leave this isn’t friendships anymore this is me just existing and they’re unlucky enough i guess to have to deal with me

this entire thing is forced, everything is forced

living feels forced at this point

i don’t feel like i’m living and every single time i have a health problem or whatever else my first thought is that my body is finally giving up on me, my mind is giving up on me, my friends gave up on me, when am i finally going to give up on me too and just end this dance i’m constantly playing with whether or not i actually want to die

i’m tired of playing this game of “what does being in a crowd matter if i constantly feel isolated and worthless”

i’m tired i’m so fucking tired i don’t know what to do anymore

i’m sure i’m exaggerating this bc i’m tired, i’m exhausted, i’m in the middle of an oc/d induced panic attack and i can’t think straight without crying my eyes out but i don’t want to do this anymore

i can’t do this dance anymore i just can’t

there’s no reason for it anymore

i’ve been grasping at every single thing for years now and it’s lost it’s novelty it’s lost its charm

i’m just existing and getting through every day like the last while feeling more and more and more alone

next year is going to be the worst bc everything will just be done bc everything is ending in less than a month

my thoughts get louder and louder every single day while nothing changes and it goes until the point where i finally just break down from the amount of stress i constantly handle alone

i don’t want to be alone anymore i really don’t

but that’s not going to change anytime soon or at all maybe and my heart just can’t take any of this anymore

i’m tired and i just want this shit to end already

please for the love of god let me catch a break, and even if that break is death i just stopped caring a while ago

i can’t do this shit anymore

i really can’t