#and because he knows shes specifically sensitive to rejection and just cried to him cause she cant feel the pain of being left by people ag

[senxitive]

Boys just don't rip kryptonite bracelets off the wrist of a vengeful couples-crazed madman to regain their super strength after the captor forced the girl they pretended to be a couple with so they could investigate a story to confess she loved them so they wouldn't be electrocuted so that they can overtake the captor and spare the girl from the rejection of answering the question of whether they love her back like they used to.

[a-purple-lizard]

Could you please do a Kabal x F!Reader

Where the reader hates the fact that he’s in the black dragons but she still loves him. So could you please write something of a love and hate relationship

With smut please 🥺

Swift dragon

Kabal x female reader

[This post is NSFW]

I’m am SO sorry this took so long, I had major writers block with this one. Personally, kabal isn’t my cup of tea, I’ve just never got the appeal to him, but I hope I did him justice.

But seriously, if anybody has any Kabal tips, please tell me! I would greatly appreciate it!

[FINAL WARNING, NSFW BELOW THE LINE]

Cold wind blew through the rugged streets, whistling as it passed through poorly made shacks and campfires. At least a hundred people, including small children and babies, were gathered around the small fires. Their clothes were little more than rags. Suddenly, a woman approached out of the darkness.

She held out her palm, allowing the homeless people of outworld to hastily take the food she has offered them. S/o smiled sadly at the children who attempted to give their food to their parents, only to be rejected. She wished she had enough to feed all of them.

After she ran out of the bread that she handed out, she swiftly climbed up only a nearby rooftop. The air stunk with smoke and human waste. “What’s up s/o? Come to visit me?”

Her heart jolted from her chest, turned around, tackling the man with a hug. He yelped at the sudden contact as s/o peppered his face with kisses. The two turned into a giggling mess as s/o sat up, straddling his thighs. Her smile suddenly melted into bitter resentment when she saw the black dragon uniform. “Babe? What’s wrong?”

“Tell me, kabal, how many children did you steal from today?” She asked coldly, getting off of him. Kabal quickly scrambled to his feet, following her to the edge of the building.

“H-hey! What’s up with that accusation?” He demanded, sitting beside her, his legs dangling off the edge.

“A month ago, half these people lived in small houses. When Kano and his goons started to charge a “protection fee” they were reduced to living out here in the cold.” Her tone held an edge to it. “So tell me kabal, when you were out collecting, how many kids did you see?”

The way kabal grimaced and turned away reminded s/o of a child who knew he was wrong was but too stubborn to admit it. “It's just business, babe. Nothin personal.”

“You’re right, it isn’t personal. Who the hell cares about starving civilians? Not the emperor, not Kano, and sure as hell not you.” Her cold voice growled. “Just business, they’re just numbers to you, specifically check numbers.”

Suddenly, s/o let out a grunt as she was pinned to the ground. Kabal stared down at her, anger in his eyes. “Don’t you put that on me.”

“Oh I’m sorry, is reality ruining your little bad boy with a cause complex?” She yelled, struggling against him, “wake the fuck up, look around, these are real people, like you and me, that you are hurting!”

“Why are you so worried about what I do!? Why can’t you just mind your own damn business!?” He yelled, his grip bruising her wrist.

“Because I love you goddammit!” S/o cried out, kabal froze at her words, grip loosening. The woman below him had tears running down her face, “I love you, more than you know. Watching you burn away your soul like this… it hurts. You’re a good guy, but Kano is corrupting you! And you’re letting him!”

Kabals eyes drifted from her for a second, clouding over with some unfamiliar emotion. The raging storm within his soul was put on pause by a soft hand on his cheek. S/o gave him a weak look. “Please, Kabal, listen. Leave the black dragon, leave Kano.”

“It isn’t that easy.” He mumbled, easing his lower body onto hers. The weight was comforting to s/o as she lifted her head to place a soft kiss into his lips. The man quickly returned it, passionately and desperate. His fingers locked around hers, pressing her down harder beneath him.

Kabals lips broke from hers and latched onto her throat. He hummed as he dragged his mouth across her skin, the rhythmic sound was intoxicating. “No, but I can make it easier.” She whispered.

A startled groan tumbled from his mouth as an knee pressed up between his thighs. S/o could feel the hardness of him through his pants. With agonizingly slow movements, she rubbed her leg up and down. His grip tightened with a growl.

“Is this your way of persuading me?” He grunted, grinding onto her leg. His mouth broke away from her flesh, he looked down atp her, eyes clouded with lust. “Cause it just might work.”

S/o leaned upwards, planting a soft kiss on his lips before pushing him back. The man fell on his back with an oof. Before kabal could even make sense of the action, s/o was atop him.

Placing a hand down onto him, she gently cupped his cheek. He sighed and leaned into it ever so slightly. “Promise me.”

Her thighs clenched around his wait as she steadily grinded into him. He grunted and tried to buck his hips up in pleasure. “I’ll only let you have me, if you promise to leave the black dragon.”

“B-babe- fuck. This is hardly fair, cmon- ah!” S/o slid her hand under her, massaging the hardness between his legs. Kabal seethed and writhed, nails digging into the ground. His eyes rolled back as she unzipped his pants, allowing her fingers to slip in.

Kabal tried to sit up, hand reaching for her breast, only to he pushed back down with her free hand. “Touch me, and I’ll stop.”

Helpless groans and pleas fell from his mouth, turning into moans of pleasure as her hands continued. She rubbed, squeezed and even licked the piece of flesh in her hand, watching each reaction as she did. “Fuck, s/o I’m close.”

Speeding up her movements, he was practically fucking her fist as he arched his back, mouth agape. He was so close only a little more-

Her touch quickly disappeared just as his high was at its brink. The man whined, trying to touch himself, but s/o didint allow him. “S/o, please, cmon.”

“Not until you promise me!” Her hands crashed on either side of his head, staring into his eyes. Her gaze held anger, sadness, regret, love? “You’re better then this, I know you are. Please.”

“I’ll- I’ll only take jobs that don’t hurt civilians, how about that?” He rasped out, at a lost for breath. “I won’t do anymore protection frees, I’ll just do regular old assassination jobs, only for people who deserve it. Bad people.”

S/o frowned, but the heat of her gaze had subsided, she sighed. “I suppose that’s the most I can get out of you at the moment.” Closing her eyes, she rolled on her back beside him. “You better get the most out of me. While I’m still around.”

Despite the threat, Kabal could hear true despair in her tone. She really did love him. Guilt clouded Kabal as he mounted her thighs. Normally there was no slow moments of intamcy, only a deep connection of mutual unspoken passion as they mercilessly merged their body’s. Tonight, that would be different.

S/o flinched in surprise when she felt a soft, pleading kiss flutter on her lips. Her wide eyes stared up as his desperate gaze. There was genuine fear and sadness. “Kabal?”

“Hey, look.” His voice was breathless as he spoke. “You are, the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You have treated me like a human being, which is more then I can say for others. I know, I’m a scum bag, I know I’m everything you’re not. But at the end of the day, you love me, no matter what I do.”

S/o smiled up at him, “I try to hate you, but everytime I try, I just end up loving you more.”

Kabal laughed, giving her a smug look, “guess I’m just that good lookin.” That earned a playful elbow in the back. He laughed once again, “ok, ok, I’ll shut up now. I’ll make you feel good.”

“Yeah?” S/o smiled as Kabal started to unbutton her shirt, exposing cleavage as she wrapped her arms around him.

“Yeah.” His lips connected with hers in a kiss. Hands crept down her body, fingertips tracing her skin, grabbing onto her thighs and separating them. Kabal placed himself between her legs, his pants were still unzipped, his problem was out in the cold air.

Kabal hovered atop her, kiss becoming much more heated as she bit his lip, demanding he give her entrance. He smugly chuckled, holding back a remark as her tongue assaulted his. After a short battle of dominance, s/o was declared the winner as she hastily explored his wet cavern.

Ripping her shirt open and unclipping her bra, sliding it off and throwing it to the side, kabals mouth ripped from her kiss and latched into her breast. S/o released a whiny moan, nails digging into his back as began to lick and suck all over. His tongue traced her skin, searching her the right spot.

Her mouth opened with a gasp as Kabal located a tender scrap of skin and began to abuse it. Biting down in it, only to suck it between his teeth. That was definitely going to leave a Mark.

S/o grinded upwards into his exposed groin. The man moaned slightly, hand reaching down to unzip her pants. His fingers slipped past her panties and into her soaked folds of sensitive flesh. He rubbed and slid his fingers around each crevice, leaving s/o a pleading mess. “Fuck... just fucking do it already.”

“As my girl commands.” He teased breathlessly, positioning himself at her entrance. His fingers took hold of her wrist, pinning them above her head as he entered her at an agonizingly slow pace, allowing himself to stretch out her inner walls. S/o writhed beneath him, clumsy moans dripping from her mouth.

He then proceeded to fuck her brains out. He was FAST like, ridiculously fast. Not superpower fast, but it was clear that he was going to make s/o pay for her teasing.

Hands tangled in hair and nails dug into skin as he drilled into her. She early met his thrust with her own, hips slamming hard enough to leave bruises. Neither of them cared.

Leaning over, his mouth assaulted hers, this time he took complete control of her mouth, invading it as he pleased. The two groaned into the kiss as his thrust became heavier, slower, sloppier.

S/o was left gasping for air as Kabal left her mouth, his saliva decorating her lips. He trailed down kisses from the corner of her mouth to the crook of her neck. His teeth met her flesh, biting and sucking.

They were both getting close already. S/o cried out each time he slammed into her, her face was pure ecstasy. “Kabal! Fuck... I’m-“

“Yeah, me too babe.” He rasped out, grip tightening as his thrust became desperate and rough until finally the knot in s/o’s stomach snapped. The two slammed their faces together, keeping eachother grounded as their release washed over them.

Kabal let go of her wrist, his hands tangling themselves in her hair. One hand drifted down to her side to rub comforting circles in her flesh. His chest steady rose up and down, the rhythmic movement against her made s/o relax her body unde him.

The high started to go down as they broke away. They simply remained still as they caught their breaths. Kabals raspy gulps of air turned into a cocky chuckle, “sombody enjoyed that.”

S/o was too exhausted to playfully slap him, instead she just gave him a look which earned a laugh. “Shut up and take me to wherever your staying. I’m tired.”

“Oh, so we can fuck on the rooftop with pigeons staring at us, but sleeping here? That’s fucking disgusting.” That one gave her the strength to slap him.

[lessonsfrommadamexmas]

EREN JAEGER AND THE ENNEAGRAM TYPE 6

First of all, to my followers, please excuse me. This account isn’t for SNK but it’s the one I have and I wanted to write this. 

Secondly, I hope this post finds the fandom lol. But if you’re expecting this to be another meta to judge Eren’s actions, don’t waste your time. The enneagram is a tool of understanding, not judgement, and I just wanted to share one thing I appreciate immensely about Eren’s characterization.

Well, why don’t we start with chapter 137? There, Zeke states that life’s purpose is to propagate and it’s core fear is to be extinguished. In other words, from the moment we are born, our organisms need to survive. As humans, we are on our own: suddenly, you gotta breathe on your own; the food is no longer provided. Everything is scary. A baby cries because everything is hard and far away and something in their biology tells them to keep fighting to survive. 

Now, onto a more spiritual approach. In El Eneagrama de la Sociedad, Claudio Naranjo says that several cultures have their own ideas and tales regarding a disconnection from a primordial state of wholeness. Once born, we become individuals and are separated from the Universe, as if we’re no longer in sync, and something is lost in the process. How can we survive? Our defense mechanisms start with that question. We need love, we need resources and we need to stand our ground in this cruel, but beautiful world. This, on the enneagram, is called “childhood trauma”. 

What I want to do in this post is to break down Eren’s character development through the lens of the enneagram, but for that, I need to give you an overview of the system. It is cruel and beautiful, just like the SNK world. It sees us with care and understanding but it also exposes the harsh truths we don’t want to see. 

The enneagram, first and foremost, is an ancient symbol, a figure of nine points connected within a circle. There’s a lot of fascinating history to it, but I’m gonna focus on what matters to this post. The enneagram is a personality system that encompasses nine essences of the Universe, and once our childhood trauma sinks in, we attach to one type which defines our worldview. Here’s how each enneatype manifests itself:

Type 1, the reformer: this person seeks to not make mistakes. They are principled and meticulous in everything they do but highly critical of themselves and others. 

Type 2, the helper: this person seeks to be needed. They are proud of their independence and helpfulness but believe they can only receive love if they give first. 

Type 3, the achiever: this person seeks to be worthy. They are motivated and ambitious but shape themselves around what is expected of them. 

Type 4, the individualist: this person seeks to build their identity. They are sensitive and creative but reject the ordinary and focus on what is harder to reach. 

Type 5, the investigator: this person seeks to be a specialist. They are perceptive and curious but withhold themselves and their resources and worry they’re never prepared. 

Type 6, the loyalist: we’ll talk about it in a moment.  

Type 7, the enthusiast: this person seeks to avoid pain. They are joyful and spontaneous but afraid of facing hardships and being swallowed by negativity and sadness. 

Type 8, the leader: this person seeks to be strong. They are fierce and protective but don’t allow themselves any vulnerability and need to be on top. 

Type 9, the peacemaker: this person seeks to be in peace. They’re kind and their inner stability is unshakable, but have a hard time asserting themselves.

So what does it mean to be a type 6?

Some of you might not believe if I told you that Eren is moved by fear. But that’s what it is. The type 6 represents fear itself. It’s our search for safety and support. The person who is a type 6 has disconnected from their inner guide and they don’t believe they have the same capability to make decisions as everyone else. That is more of an unconscious state, which manifests through an overly alert stance. Sixes are always on the lookout for threats and danger, their minds work predicting things that can go wrong, so they can be prepared. In other words, the type 6 fears how imprevisible life is, because they truly don’t find in themselves the compass to the answers they need “in this very moment”. They have to be one step ahead and they have to find outside structures for support, people in whom to trust and who’ll give them the guidelines and sense of balance. Fellowship and loyalty are essential to the type 6 as they look for reassurance in their concerns. 

In Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery (1996), Don Richard Riso has described nine levels of development for the enneatypes. They are the path from our healthy, healed state where we’re closer to wholeness again (Level 1) down to our most broken state where we’ve abandoned ourselves (Level 9). 

When we start Attack on Titan, Eren is on Level 6. Here’s what Riso says:

“In its innocent forms, counterphobia is well employed by people to master their fears — for example, children who are afraid of the dark might purposefully go to a dark room to overcome their fear.”

Eren, too, wanted to overcome his fear since he was a kid. He wanted to go outside and face those faceless titans. He wanted people around him to be prepared, but since the Garrison was incompetent and lazy, he needed to be prepared. Grisha seems to be Eren’s first authority figure. From what we know, Grisha allowed Eren to have his own thoughts and didn’t impose anything on him, which is a kind of reassurance. Thus, with his father, Eren felt more understood. 

Carla, on the other hand, wished for Eren’s immediate safety and cared about him living a quiet life. But that also means she couldn’t understand his concerns, and the type 6 interprets that demeanor as vulnerability — his mother is more exposed to the threat. If the type 6 is a room where nobody is vigilant, the only option they see is to step up and become hypervigilant.

This relation to an authority is very specific for the type 6 as they search for people and systems in whom to rely on. Since the Garrison aren’t the most reliable soldiers around, Eren turns to the Survey Corps. That section of the military consists of the rebels, those who want to explore the unknown, understand the titans and figure out the best way to fight the enemy. The SC wants to be free, so they become Eren’s next “authority figure”. 

Riso also says that the type 6 in Level 6 has a more aggressive stance and wants to prove to others that he isn’t indecisive and can’t be pushed around. 

“They blame and berate whatever threatens them. They become rebellious… and are desperate to latch onto a position or stance that will make them feel stronger and dispel their feelings of inferiority.”

The type 6 feels inferior because they feel lost inside. Eren, too, knows that the threat lurking behind those walls is much bigger than him and a single human doesn’t stand a chance. And he berates people around him for not seeing what he sees, or for disrespecting his “heroes”.

Eren will be back to Level 6 later, embodying other aspects of it, but let’s talk about the moment he joins the army. 

At this point, Eren reaches the stable position he has been eager for. He is part of a group and working towards his goals, he feels more confident because he’s preparing for the next attack. He has climbed to Level 4:

“The security which groups and institutions provide far exceeds the strength of any individual members...”

As we know, Eren sees his mission to eradicate all titans also as a social responsibility. The type 6 can easily fall into “us versus them” mentality where they are putting effort into something and will trust only the people who understand the importance of it. Eren’s bickering with Jean, as well as his admiration for Reiner starts from there. 

“And even within their own group, average Sixes make it their business to find out who is pulling the weight and who is not... If others are not loyal or committed, it not only makes them angry, it threatens them.”

Eren talks over and over about how he’s going to join the suicide squad, to the point people start making fun of him. But he is testing everyone’s commitment to the cause of “fighting titans” and he finds people like Jean, who only really want their safe life, as well as Reiner, who is dedicated and understands him immediately. Reiner becomes his new “authority figure”: whenever Eren’s failing, Reiner is there to understand him, to offer help and to remind him of why he’s there.

“The loyalty of average Sixes for the people with whom they have identified is almost without bounds. They find it extremely difficult to break their emotional bonds, even should they desire to do so… Their love may, in time, turn to hatred but never to indifference.”

That one speaks for itself. It’s exactly how Eren felt upon RBA’s betrayal. He’s in total denial about Annie, while for Reiner/Berthold all he has left is rage. 

Choosing who to trust is part of the type 6 identity. All of their beliefs, all their inner world is shaken if they are betrayed, because the network they build is how they find a safe space for themselves in the world and how they orient themselves. Annie was Eren’s parameter of fighter, Reiner was Eren’s parameter of leadership. The first backstab is too hard for him to process, we see it all unfold. He can’t admit she’s a traitor, and he doesn’t even have the will to transform and fight her. 

The second one, however, is embraced somewhat faster and he’s even able to contain himself and play along. But it doesn’t change how deeply it affected him and how vengeful he gets. Years later, that hatred would dissipate, but never to indifference — Eren still feels a need for some closure between them. 

I got ahead of myself on the timeline, so I’m going to rewind to the moment Eren joins the Survey Corps, which is his childhood dream. Erwin is his main authority figure now and you see that, even though Erwin locked him up, he trusts the guy. As Don Riso explains, the type 6 on Level 4 plays by the rules of his group because he strongly believes in those rules and they bring comfort to their minds. In reality, the SC doesn’t really know what they’re doing. Erwin himself doesn’t know how he’s gonna cross the walls and find out the truth. But Eren is devoted to them. Their cause is his cause and he knows how hard it is but what matters is they’re trying. Besides, they embrace him. They want to reach the basement and want to defend him on the court and want to investigate/use his titan power. Thus, for Eren, the SC is the most solid and welcoming place to be. He’ll do whatever they want from him. 

However, Eren was about to find out that things were far from glorious out there. Although the Survey Corps work under strict “plans” that soldiers are supposed to follow blindly, Eren can’t just watch people being sacrificed to protect him. Especially when he has enough power to act in a more significant way than those individual humans. But how much control does he have over his own power? Eren can’t answer that, and he feels immensely conflicted as soldiers continue to drop dead. 

In that moment, Levi could’ve forced him to follow his orders, and perhaps that would’ve eased his mind when he chose not to transform. But the captain is a different kind of leader than Erwin, and he challenges Eren instead:

And I really appreciate how fitting that is to the type 6 conflit. It’s very difficult for them to accept it, sometimes there simply isn’t a clear path, sometimes it is okay to trust yourself and act on your own. But this is what Eren’s thinking:

That didn’t turn out very well, did it? At the end of the expedition, Eren is forced to admit that the SC don’t have all the answers and that all his power and training can’t always keep everyone safe. He’s once again reminded of that after activating the Coordinate — not even the power to control titans can avoid sacrifices.

Ideally, the type 6 can only reach the safety they seek once they allow themselves to move in the chaos with the courage to face it step by step, instead of predicting it. This may sound easy for others but not for them, especially if they are inserted in a reality where the cost of a mistake is lives.  

So we get to the Uprising arc. It starts with the Survey Corps planning the retake of Wall Maria while they put Eren through hardening experiments. Time is not on their side and Eren’s determined to go beyond his limits during the tests. 

“They consequently try to further strengthen their ‘social security’ systems by working harder to be accepted and approved by their allies and authorities… Others wonder if they resent the workloads and pressures they seem to be under, yet Sixes seem eager to fulfill their obligations and duties...”

Eren’s entire world would fall apart again once he’s kidnapped by Rod Reiss and discovers the truth of his father’s sin. Like I said earlier, Grisha was one of Eren’s authority figures, and even though he was absent, the basement key and the promised truth kept son and father connected. Wherever Grisha was, Eren could still count on the answers he’d left behind. 

That is, until he is hit by a trainwreck of a revelation that his father killed an entire family and sacrificed himself to pass on the titans to him. Eren’s left completely lost, he no longer knows what to think of himself, of the world, of his father.

He falls from Level 4 to Level 7:

“Sixes become trapped in an unhealthy pattern of self-disparagement and massive insecurity which reinforces feelings of inferiority and worthlessness, a marked deterioration from the indecision and evasiveness we saw [before].”

This shift to a much more confused and self-loathing state doesn’t last long because Eren has his friend’s support for now. Historia chooses to see his worth and let him live. Levi once again challenges him to make his own decision, and Eren manages to save the day.

As Eren becomes aware of those destructive feelings, he tries to get rid of them by “fighting” himself, in an attempt to put himself back up.

He realizes he isn’t alone and he doesn’t have to do everything on his own, people around him are also strong enough to stand up for themselves. That helps him return to a more average stage and it could have been the beginning of his growth... 

Well, if only life wouldn’t have a surprise waiting for him at every corner. 

I hope you’re being able to follow and understand that we all have ups and downs in life. The levels of development represent exactly that, so it is common to find yourself in the same stage in different periods of your life. Nevertheless, after Eren learns the truth about the world and sees his future memories, it all goes downhill for him, no turning back anymore.  

Here is what Riso comments on the ambivalence of the type 6 on Level 5:

“Sixes begin to follow the narrow path between the expectations of their allies and authorities and their need to resist having any further demands placed on them.”

Eren is overwhelmed by the view of the outside world. He has experienced his father’s memories first hand and it’s nothing like what he expected. No one around him has the same perspective. A lot of self-awareness and self-doubt emerge from the future memories he saw through Historia. Riso explains that on Level 5 the person starts to become more worried about how their allies feel about them. 

“They become skeptical of new views and ideas, feeling that they have already put a lot of effort into understanding the perspectives and approaches they already know.”

Eren went from “I HATE TITANS ALL TITANS ARE MY ENEMIES DESTROY ‘EM ALL” to “titans are my people and they haven’t chosen this horrible outcome”. And that’s A LOT to process when you wrapped your life around that initial idea. But things are changing even faster, and his friends are talking about how the enemy could be reached out too. This thought needs to coexist in Eren with the clear image he has of the enemy, one that only he has accessed. Add to that how Eren was kept away from the Marleyan prisoners as Paradis also feared some kind of betrayal. As long as there’s people out there against them, he can’t so easily rest. 

Who knows at what point Eren returns to Level 6. The time skip is covered very loosely. But probably when he is feeling so lost that he actually comes to Historia to vent. 

“As in other types, to be functioning in this Level or lower usually indicates that there were extremely dysfunctional elements in the child’s environment.”

Self-explanatory. It’s even hard to talk about Level 6 because it is a point where Sixes start to overthink threats that aren’t that big, but in Eren’s case, the threat is 100% REAL and there’s a world isolating them and wishing for his people to die and throwing gigantic creatures at them. No big deal at all.

Eren turns to the people who actually understand the urgency he feels. Floch is eager to follow him, while Zeke and Yelena have an actual plan. Eren says he’s acting out of his own decisions, and he sure is, but he has also left it in Zeke’s hands to set the course. At this point, it no longer is a positive thing for the type 6 to have reassurance instead of a grounding support, it’ll only leave them trapped in the current mentality. 

What would be more appropriate would be a balance between rejection…

…and full acceptance.  

(By the way, I can’t even know where Historia stands, since she let him do his thing, but I’m still using her here because of how immediate her reaction was, which could lead Eren to think he can’t risk telling anyone else. Unhealthy Sixes are just that paranoid.)

Zeke could have been Eren’s new “authority figure“ if their goals were the same. But more and more the only thing Eren is starting to rely on are the future memories.

Riso talks about how a violent environment would lead to violent actions and “they end up using the same aggressive tactics on others”. And I can draw a parallel with how Eren has been facing titans for so long and watched them take people from him, that he just feels aggression arise whenever he thinks of all the injustice he has witnessed. Same would happen later on, when he sees Ymir’s memories and finally decides to unleash this pain on the world.

“It’s hard for Sixes to work for something. Instead, their energies are galvanized by being against people and things.”

Despite being highly conflicted and problematic, Eren so far has waited. It’s too hard at this point to fully engage with those dreams, but he has watched things unfold and allowed the Survey Corps to do their stuff and try to contact the outside world. On Level 7, the type 6 is just going through the day with little hope. When the SC reaches Marley and Eren meets the boy of his memories, he can no longer escape from facing himself.

“Tearful and obsequious, they are disgusted with themselves for not having been tough enough to stand on their own two feet, to defend themselves, to be independent.”

Not only Eren, but Paradis as a whole, have been unable to be independent in a much bigger world, or this is how he sees it after Kyiomi monopolizes the resources and the pro-Eldians group rejects the island. Finally, Eren recognizes in himself the person who would be capable of trampling the kid he currently wants to save, and that leaves him disgusted.   

“They do not necessarily deceive others maliciously, but to escape punishment or abandonment. They believe they may be able to repair the damage they have caused...”

What Riso is saying here is that the type 6 feel the need to hide (themselves) so their loved ones won’t abandon them. And again, in Eren’s case, he has a damn good reason to think his loved ones might not be super happy if he said he was going to destroy the whole world. Let’s not forget they are the people who counted on him to save the world this whole time, and he is the person several people have been sacrificed for. 

All this pressure has brought him this low, but Eren reaches rock bottom when he allows himself to admit he wished for it all to be destroyed. Now, he can no longer face his family (as he would tell Falco) and he has little faith in himself. 

Again, Eren’s paranoias aren’t so far from reality because there is, indeed, a world against them, and that keeps feeding into his anxiety. Paradis’s progress is little and the future is uncertain. When the type 6 reaches Level 9, they can no longer get out of this spiral. They know it’s only a matter of time until the threat comes to them. So they call the threat upon themselves.

Eren allowed himself to go as far as understanding his enemies and accepting that they’re the same, but with the declaration of war, he can’t wait anymore.

I already told you the reason: the type 6 needs to be able to predict. That’s the very core of their beings, their minds seek to control events. Striking first is their final attempt to make sure they won’t be taken by surprise. Ultimately, they are lost and desperate to find support again. Here’s what Riso says about the type 6 on Level 9:

“They may drop out, abasing themselves as vagrants and living in skid row conditions, thus allowing their health and minds to deteriorate to the point of no return.”

It almost feels like Isayama has read this book, I swear to God. Yeah, that’s word by word what Eren does. He goes to enemy territory, injures himself and throws himself in war. Despite resisting for so long to a new perspective of his enemies, Eren allows himself to see them with his own eyes. All because he’s desperate to understand his enemy, desperate to understand himself (and what would lead to his decision) and desperate to run away from his friends. He is ashamed of choosing those future memories as his new authority figure, get it? They are the most certain thing in his life now. As much as he waited and as much as the SC tried, they don’t have any guaranteed future and it’s just too hard for the type 6, especially unhealthy Sixes, to wait. It’s impossible. 

Remember I said that Sixes want to feel understood? Well, I think Eren feels understood, to some degree, when he’s among those broken soldiers. They are relatable, more than anyone else. 

“Neurotic Sixes bring disaster of some sort upon themselves not to end their relationship with authority figures, but to reestablish a protective one. [...] It is also important to notice that neurotic Sixes are masochist not because they take pleasure in suffering as such, but because they hope their suffering will bring someone to their side who’ll save them… as if to say, ‘Punish me, because I’ve been bad. Then you can love me again.’”

In the mind of the unhealthy type 6, if he can’t find the answers, he can’t be there for his allies. If he fails his allies, he doesn’t deserve their support. But even when he feels he doesn’t deserve it and feels they won’t forgive him, he desperately needs it — the type 6 doesn’t know how to live without support. He is completely aware of his cowardice, he may unleash his despair in innocent people, he seeks punishment for his behavior and hopes for someone to end his pain.

“Unhealthy Sixes are self-defeating persons who are their worst enemies. If they persist in their masochist behavior, neurotic Sixes will drive away everyone on whom they depend. They will be abandoned and alone, the very things they most fear.”

Eren pushed everyone away, but deep down he waited for them to come to his rescue. He knew he was a lost cause, but still couldn’t let go of what he saw as a compromise, a duty to them. His completely cruel and extreme actions are, in enneagram terms, his way to not leave his allies adrift. But aren’t all his actions for his own freedom? I don’t think so, not entirely. There’s a reason the type 6 has been named “the loyalist” — they always, always see themselves as part of a group. And in the end, he saw himself in Ymir, someone who was trapped and waiting to be rescued, understood. Don Riso says the worst part of coming this low is how much Sixes hurt others while they hurt themselves, both because they want to harm everyone who doesn’t understand and to show people the worst in themselves; they want to punish and be punished at same the time.

That is what I wanted to break down — Eren’s inner process. Yes, the type 6 is an ambivalent, contradicting personality type, precisely because that’s how they feel inside. Other enneagram types don’t escape from their own personal conflicts, that’s also important to point out. The enneagram does not define integrity, people capable of causing great harm exist in all types and no one from type 6 is fated to destroying the world — just in case that isn’t obvious. 

This post is heavy, I know. One of the things I love about SNK are the emotions it evokes and how human characters are. I’m so thankful to have followed Eren’s fascinating journey. He has never hit me as a one-dimensional character as some people claim. To me, Eren is not a chad, he’s not a monster, either. He’s just human. 

I’m thankful for this fandom as well. We’re a total mess but the monthly wait would’ve killed me without the crazy theories and the heated discussions.  

[din0pants-blog]

Guess ill be the first! Is it possible to get some nsfw headcanons and a scenario of their first time?

Firstly, I’d like to apologize for taking so obscenely long toget to this! That said, I was originally going to do both headcanonsand the scenario, but in the interest of getting this posted ASAP, Ionly did the scenario for now (don't worry though, I didn't rush it).However, if you still want the NS*FW headcanons, Anon, please feelfree to send another request asking for them and I will gladly get to them whenever I can!!!

Little bonus fact about this piece: I was originally planning onincluding Diego making a metaphor comparing his... naughty time withHot Pants to the Devil tempting her into a fall from Grace, but Icouldn't quite figure out how to make it fit, given the direction Itook this piece in, so ultimately, I dropped the idea. It'sadmittedly an interesting idea on paper, but I feel like Hot Pantswouldn't have taken too kindly to it anyway (especially in context),so it's just as well that I decided against the metaphor's inclusion.

Requested content is under the cut! 18+ readers only, please:

Many people have an idea of how they imagine their first time willbe, whether in general or with a specific person–an ideal scenario.Predictably, some end up setting their expectations quite high, butvery rarely are those ideals realized. However, even when someone'sfirst time having sex doesn't go according to plan, though some aredisappointed, others are very pleasantly surprised by the unexpectedturn the situation had taken.

However, neither Diego nor Hot Pantscould have been said to have any sort of ideal planned out for theirfirst time. The former had never thought of sex as something that wasworth idealizing, while the latter actively attempted to banish allsuch desires from her very being whenever they popped up and sorarely allowed herself to entertain thoughts about sex at all. Assuch, it makes the situation they currently find themselves in allthe more surprising, Hot Pants straddling Diego's lap, rolling herhips firmly against the slowly but surely growing erection beneathher. Her breaths come in short, quiet, and frustrated bursts, hereyes screwed shut as she focuses on getting Diego ready, but mainlyon her own pleasure.

“Are you having a hard time?”he asks.

“Hush.”

“You're getting nowhere fast.”

“Because you keepbreaking my focus.”

“You've never done this before,have you? Let me hel-”

“Shut up, Diego!”

He narrows his eyes and snorts in abestial sort of way. “If you want to be stubborn and strugglemeaninglessly, be my guest. But if you must insist on it, then I, onthe other hand, will be going to sleep. Who knows? You might manageto give me a nice wet dream,” he taunts.

Hot Pants' motions suddenly come to agrinding halt and she narrows her eyes at him in response. “... Youwouldn't.”

He shrugs nonchalantly as he getshimself comfortable, making sure his companion still has unencumberedaccess to his frontside. “Try me,” he says to her, shutting hiseyes in a casual display of defiance, truly prepared to make good onhis word. “I offered to help and you so carelessly refused myoffer. That's not myproblem.”

Clutching at the turtleneckcollar of his sweater, Hot Pants pulls herself closer, her face up inDiego's own, the tip of her nose pressing uncomfortably against his.“Listen, Brando,” she hisses. “It isyour problem. You startedthis. You deliberately riled me up and now you're telling me thatyou're going to sleep instead??? What do you want,dammit?! For the love of all that is holy, be straightforward withme!”

“What a ridiculous question,”Diego chides. “Isn't it obvious?”

“What did I just finish sayi-!!!”

His lips are on hers before she canfinish. It's not a particularly chaste kiss, but it's notparticularly passionate either. And then it's over. Hot Pants isdazed while Diego looks at her with the titillated gaze of an ancientpredator. “I wanted to rile you up, of course,” he tells her,finally answering her question properly. “Can't you feel it? Theracing of your heart? The flush of your skin? The roar of your blood?… The wetness between your legs?” Hot Pants blinks, but realizesthat he's right.

“It's thrilling, isn't it...?”he says quietly, grinning unnaturally wide, the points of sharp teethpeeking from past his lips and his split cheeks, though his featuresrevert to something recognizably and unalarmingly human withinseconds.

“... I'm not answering that.”

“Mm? Which question in specific?”

“All of them. I'm not answering anyof those questions.”

Reaching down to her clothed groin, herubs at her. Hot Pants quietly gasps out a, “Yes...”whimpering at Diego's tender touch. “A pity you won't tell meyourself. But your body betrays you, Hot Pants. It speaks the wordsyou refuse to say with your voice. I can feel it; you're hot andslick. I can smell it; it's earthy and sweet. I can see it. Oh, butyou're not even aware, are you? I've been keeping my hand perfectlystill. Mostly,��� he tells her and she suddenly becomes all too awareof her hips rolling against the pads of the man's inviting fingers.She jerks to a halt, becoming self-conscious and he removes hisfingers from their spot, purposely running them against her sensitiveclit before resting both that hand—covered in her delectablescent—and the other on her hips. In her sudden stillness, her sexcradling Diego's own again, she takes notice of the fact that he'sfully erect now, his firm shaft undeniably pressing and throbbingexcitedly against her.

“Let me help you,” Diego repeats,staring her in the eyes, his voice low.

Hot Pants is silent now,but—reciprocating his stare—instead of speaking, she tugs atDiego's sweater, managing to remove it from his body with hisassistance. Working at her own clothing momentarily, just long enoughto expose her chest and torso to him, she works on unfastening thebelt securing his jodhpurs. She should feel indecent, she should feellike the filthy sinner she knows herself to be. But then... why doesher soul feel unaffected by the stain that plagues it? It's stillthere--this, she knows—but for the first time since her childhood,she feels untouchable, like the sin and the guilt can't haunther.

Sheseeks more of Diego's body, briefly runs her hands upon the strong,muscular planes. Her breathing comes and goes heavily. She's high onthis drug, on the peace and the lackadaisy she feels towards thatmistake, the iniquitythat has tormented her very being since the very moment it had beencommitted.

'More... I need...'

“Diego,I need more. Touch me...” she finally murmurs, pulling Diego'slower garments down as much as she can, exposing his cock—drippingfrom the tip with pre-ejaculate —to the chilly Autumn air. Diego'spupils narrow into slits again, Hot Pants' plea sending fire throughhis veins, making it all the more difficult for him to reject thecall of the wild that echoes within his skull. Tearing apart thecrotch of her leggings like thin paper, before she can gripe aboutit, he's lifting her by her hips and seating her on his lap, hislength penetrating her wholly and suddenly. Hot Pants immediatelytightens around him, letting out a startled cry, eyes wide, breathstaccato as she desperately plants her hands against his chest in aneffort to keep herself grounded in the midst of the shock of intenselightning pleasure that has struck her entire body and surges to herhead and through her limbs, causing her digits against his chest andin the dry, gritty soil to curl and her head to be filled with athick, Nirvanic fog.

Havingbarely given her time to adjust, Diego bucks into her from below. Hischeeks have split open again, a scaly patch forming beneath his lefteye. With clawed, blue-tinted saurian hands, he firmly grips herrear—the points of his ivory claws pricking dangerously into themeaty flesh—and guides her motions. She quickly comes to understandwhat he's asking of her and rolls her hips as he thrusts into herfrom below; her compliance earns her the reward of happy chitteringfrom Diego's throat.

He'slarge, easily filling her and stretching her. The heat of his bodyinside of her is enough to draw moans, sweet like honey, forth fromher lips. Every thrust up into her slick warmth resounds with a wet,carnal slap,slap,slap thatintermingles with her moans and sighs, with her trembling calls ofDiego's name.

“Die-g-go...I-I think I'm... OhGod...” Hot Pantsfeels somethingwinding tighter in her lower belly, growing hotter, tensing,twisting.“More... Faster, harder, anything!Please!” Diego eagerly complies, pistoning into her in earnest now.“I didn't mean by thatmuch!!” sheexclaims, crying out in pleasure. And yet, quickly, those wordlesscries become a chant of Diego's name, each repetition coming outhigher and higher-pitched until finally, her back involuntarilyarches forward and her head falls back. All at once, she feels theintense heat that had been building up inside of her bursting intoevery part of her body, her lungs are burning for air, her cuntthrobs around Diego's length, and the heavenly haze in her headintensifies. Amidst the simultaneous sensations that assault herhypersensitive body, she's faintly aware of an additional liquid heatpouring into her.

Asthough instinctively, Diego holds her close. Despite the wonderfulfeelings echoing within her and the exhaustion that urges her eyesclosed, she can't help but think that Diego's probably not entirelyaware of the unusually affectionate action he's performing. Beforeshe allows herself rest, she's all too aware that this feeling offreedom she's experiencing is going to disappear soon enough.

'Though... Even if it'sforbidden, I want to feel this again.'

Openingher eyes once more, she looks up at the now-slumbering Diego's facefor a short bit before closing them once more and, exhaling throughher nose, she makes herself comfortable and before settling intosleep herself, she asks God to forgive her.

[instantlysassywombat]

Fatgum x Fiance reader💞🍡

I couldn't get enough of the Extra gum commercials with the guy proposing to his high school girl💞 and I thought of my Gummy!So this is for all my FatGum lovers🍡😚 btw this fic will be more for me with the the specific looks and attitude from the reader only because in this blog I will be doing requests that will be more relatable to the person requesting them just putting e/c or say hair color of the reader is bald yah feel? I hope i make sense since it is 1:40am😪🍡

You were just getting off from your 12 hour shift at a local hotel near you and Taishiros apartment.You were exhausted with training and on top of that dealing with rude guests.All you wanted was a nice hot bath and a nap to catch up from all the extra hours your boss gave you.Walking through the front door you found your loving boyfriend laying on the sofa with Gigi the dog you both rescued.You couldnt help but squeal at how cute your two loves were,beinh in cuddle bug mode.

"Look at my two big babies!"you smiled with one hand on your cheek and the other on the door handle.

"Cupcake!!"he got up with gigi and hugged you with all the pent up love he was holding in since it was his day off.

"Not so hard baby..my backs been killing me" you instantly regretted telling him about hour back cause he was thr biggest love bug of all time and hated to reject his love.

"Want me to run you a nice hot bath?" He brushed his lips against your neck making you giggle as his words viborated in your sensitive area.

"That would be amazing gummy!"you replied with that smile that made his heart fluttered.

He let gigi down as she stretched only to have Taishiro pick you up bridal style to the master bathroom.

"I think I can take it from here"you said with a sly smirk as he places you on the rim of the tub.

"You got it sweet thing"he said giving you the hand gun motion with a sink as he left the room.

He left you to the undressing since you just wanted to relax and not push his hormons on you cause he just wasnt that type of guy.

While you closed your eyes and took a deep breath in laying in the warm water Taishiro came in with a bottle of wine and chocolates.

Your heart fluttered as he poured you a glass and have you a quick peck on the lips.

"Your so beautiful..you know?" He said knealing down on the bathroom floor leaning against the tub.

His eyes soft and a light blush crept across his cheeks.

"How can i forget when you tell me every day?" You smiled back at the love if your life.

"and you know i can take care of you..right?" He asked takinh your hand ever so gently.

"Tai.. did something at work today?" You asked concerned as your boyfriend started to tear up a bit.

He noticed and whipped his tears away with his free hand and have you a chuckle.

"No it's not like that" he reassured you with his hand to your warm cheek.

Ypu looked at him with your beautiful brown eyes with your long flawless eyelashes and the way your hair was in a messy bun and your cute little ears with the diamonds earrings he gave you for your 2 year anniversary.

But it wasn't all looks for this guy,you were smart,funny,cute,protective,sweet and always looked for the good in someone with a smile that never seemed to fade away.

You could tell Taishiro was deep in thought so you just sat up from the warm water with your breasted still submurged under the steamy water.

"Will you marry me?"he asked with a cheaky grin and more tears came aflow.

You were taken back at the question and jumped up forgetting you were naked and hugged him.

"Yes!! Yes!! 100 times Yes!!" Your cried into his t-shirt as he held you close to him.

You couldnt believe it happened,he asked you to be his wife!No longer a girlfdiend but now a fiance your head was spinning.

So much so your legs gave out and slumped over from the excitement and the streamy bathroom.

He looked down at you as if you were a tiny kitten,he picked you up and sat you on the chair by your vanity where you normally did your make up.He grabbed a towel and fried you off while you looked a bit sleepy from all the excitedment and steam.You looked down at him with sleepy eyes but still has that non stop smile.

"Why don't I get us to bed shall we?he said giving a chuckle as you rubbed your eye and stretched your other arm.

You nodded and got up as he grabbed your sailor moon night gown and picked you up tgen places you on the bed,while he came from his side of tge bed to you.Giving you a sweet kiss on the lips and you both facing each other.

"I love you so much my beautiful fiance" he whispered.

"And i love you my handsome fiance" you whispered back and you both dozed off with gigi at the end of the bed.

Probably a lot of missspells and errors but in my defense it is 3:19am.🌛💫

[aslguy-blog]

On Coming Out

On some level I’ve always known I was gay, even if I didn’t have a word for it. Some of my scariest memories from childhood were of awkward struggles to relate to the other boys around me. Those I struggled to relate to the most were those boys who, even at a young age, had an aura of budding masculinity. They were always tan, and showed early aptitude for athleticism. I was a blond-haired mama’s boy with pinkish skin that would turn red or white, depending on the season. And it was thin. I was sensitive and cried when I had to be away from my mother for an extended period of time. Sleepovers. The first few days of kindergarten. Church camp. I had a serious case of separation anxiety.

I always knew something was different about me, and my mom and my sister were the only two people with whom I felt completely safe. They provided me with a sense of security, and maybe even more importantly--a sense of oel ngati kameie. In the fictional Na’vi language from the movie Avatar, it means “I see you” not just in the sensory perceptive way, but in the “I understand you” way.

So, at the tender age of 24 when I was ready to come out, it only made sense that I would tell them first, specifically my sister Karen. She had recently began telling me that there isn’t anything I could say or do that would make her love me any less—not in subtle ways, but literally saying that out loud at the end of our frequent phone conversations. What I didn’t realize immediately is that she was practically begging me to come out. It was the closest she could come to saying, “I know you’re gay and it’s okay,” without coming right out and saying it, on the off chance that I didn’t know I was gay. Because of this, I knew she would be a good litmus test for how my family would accept the fact that my 20-year “awkward” phase wasn’t really a phase. I was going to be awkward for the rest of my life.

While I had a tentative plan to tell her, my need to tell someone came to a boil when my first serious boyfriend broke up with me right around my birthday. Hands trembling, I picked up the phone and dialed her number. Already fighting back tears, when I heard her say “Hello” the dam that had been holding back my tears started to fail. I was about to ugly-cry.

I struggled to find my voice. She knew immediately something was wrong, and while I don’t recall the specifics of the conversation after that point, it did involve me telling her that I was gay. And as cliché as it sounds, it was a tremendous weight off of my shoulders. The weight of that secret is unimaginable until you’ve carried it, this worry of the very real possibility of being rejected by your family because of who you are. It is completely terrifying to risk the longest love you’ve ever known.

After talking a while, I asked Karen if she thought I should tell our mom.

“Yes, because she kind of already knows,” was not quite the answer I was expecting. When pressed, my sister said that they talk about me quite often, each asking the other if I had come out yet. Perhaps if my family were the gambling types, they’d have made a friendly wager. Feeling relieved, I hung up and called my mom. While I felt confident that her love for me wouldn’t waver, I was about to utter words that would not only change my world but also hers. In a moment, she would grieve my wedding and any grandchildren she’d been looking forward to me giving her, and I was keenly aware of that. In order to protect myself from the pain of a negative reaction, my brain blocked out most of that conversation. I remember my mom being quiet for a moment, and then telling me she already knew. She asked if I was scared of getting sick, a thinly-veiled reference to AIDS, the disease that had robbed my family of my brother Robbie barely 10 years before.

I guess now would be a good time to mention that my oldest brother was also gay. I was only 13 years old when he died at the age of 25. He had come out to my dad on Christmas Eve. Both of them had been drinking, and it didn’t end well. It wasn’t a smart choice, and should he and I meet in any manner of afterlife you can bet, “What the fuck were you thinking!?” is going to be one of the first things I say to him, quickly followed by a hug and “Thank you.” My family didn’t handle Robbie’s coming out well. He was estranged off and on from our family. They got it right the second time with me, but only because Robbie taught them about love, loss, and second chances.

After telling mom, I called Karen back to fill her in. I told her that I had left it up to mom as to whether or not to tell her husband. He came from a Southern Baptist background, and I didn’t want to cause any problems in their marriage, especially since I lived 8 hours away. We were discussing how we thought he may react when the call waiting kicked in. “Hang on, it’s Mom again.” In hindsight this felt like a scene from Will & Grace or Modern Family.

I clicked over to the other line. “Hello?” I said, expecting to hear my mom’s voice. “Well son, it don’t make no difference to me,” I heard my stepdad say in his booming voice, thick with an accent that seems to come uniquely from the part of Missouri where I was raised. I laughed nervously, completely caught off guard, and then he put my mom on the line. She had decided to tell him, and he was fine. I then asked mom what she thought about me telling my brother Roger. She said she thought he would be okay with it, but I wanted to think about it a little bit longer. We hung up and I stood in the silence of my apartment, feeling like a different person than I did an hour ago. I began to gather my thoughts, thinking about what I needed to do to prepare for the next day when the phone rang again. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was my brother. A smile grew across my face as I realized what was happening. As I was in my apartment in Cincinnati, emotionally exhausted, the phone lines began to light up in rural Missouri for what was going to be an epic night of the Telephone Game. My mom had called my brother to tell him, and I believe it was the first of many calls she made that night. Because I don’t recall having to come out to the rest of my family. Ever. Aunts, uncles, cousins—all knew and none seemed to care. It never occurred to me to ask my mom why she did that. Whether she confided in them for her own support, or wanted to spare me further awkward conversations, I am grateful that she never expected me to hide who I was from anyone.

I tell this story because this month was National Coming Out Day. One of the reasons we call attention to the importance of coming out is visibility. Before I came out, I often felt alone. Yes, I had family. I had friends, but they were compartmentalized into gay friends, church friends, friends from high school, work friends—each knowing only a facet of me. But there was no one who had known me my whole life, the real me--all of me, until I made the choice to share that with them.

[dilrajwilhide1995]

Female Cat Spraying Video Unbelievable Tips

When the cat tends to shed the old outer part of a cat, place the post however, you can stand guard in the house; even though they were to do this yourself without risking the tick's head staying behind in your carpet, or furniture, allow 24 hours a day.Breeding cats can climb, hide and pounce on these plants.That time has come into the carpet is by making sure your cat is not bad cat behavior problems and I have found these brands of litter box every time.They tend to become unclean, this is an instinct and behavior works, that way for a place where you don't feel comfortable visiting your home of these viruses indicates that your cat may reject.

You must understand the right amount of coat should your cat stops, entice him over for any deep abdominal surgery.Absorb as much urine as a lack of confidence that they are ready for more than one as this will make her come out of your house other than in other ways.Once you have made their home to an all female cat shows a behavior change.Providing your cat to scratch the bindings on books.Fleas and ticks can also be made a fuss of, usually immediately, so will you.

If you've ever had a play bite and scratch your furniture to make a few of the swelling of the bedroom, not if you think you are uncertain about how to train your cat be prepared for your cat.This is good to scratch will also likely to either pleasurable for good behavior with treats following a cat is sick or injured.Sometimes cats will figure it out faster.Also, you might get hit by a car or a tumour can also use a hairdryer to do something.They also dislike surfaces that are proud to say he will get use to remind everyone that it has been shown to decrease the number of reasons why pets urinate or defecate outside of the cats.

Cats are creative and can be pretty sure your can can move and stretch.Don't give her a Christmas tree is not as difficult as it serves to facilitate in cleaning up blood.Although your little tiger from leaving marks on his shots, nueter and microchip, a pet to the stain.How Do I Keep My Cat Off the Christmas season roused their pet's instinct for cats to hide including the eggs.The water actually helps work with the habit.

He thinks it is imperative that you are prepared for anything.The charm includes a sensor that indicates that Feliway really works.For instance, if you prepare enough litter boxes available if that works and what your cat has soiled in another home.They will find several cat scratch the furniture, you can lay eggs.Go outside and will help keep your cat from creating a mess all over the cat, he will spray:

This is because they are too concerned about the best way to protect both the backing and the cat box at the cat has a cat has tasted these recipes baking cat treats as a place where they can smell there urine.Few dogs and cats over the cat's legs and untangle the hair, then brush the mat is generally made of wood.You will be more sensible to get some rubbing alcohol is a company that makes cat uncomfortableSprays, predator urine, ultrasonic devices... you can develop into swelling of the competition between them.Fleas and ticks are easily bored when they are scratching or to cover what they want.

When you bring the crate is only if you can't see the rashes.Some cat furniture for both cats should be confined indoors for a week can really help ease matters for cat nip.But even when you decide to bring a new smell.All the following things should factor into your pet's overall health care, you can saturate the padding underneath the carpet.Litter in the creases where the urine is worse than any other animal on this information, are you won't be exposed to them it is as simple as a serious cat urine stains can cause a lot of chemicals in the cat's around.

Trying to get rid of these viruses indicates that your indoor or an outdoor behaviour, but some of these posts are so many years of loyal companionship from your hippie days or the furniture.When you first notice the cat or features a 7-inch wide super strong door that makes life more pleasant than smelling it for granted.If you can do certain things to make Kitty feel safe again.If you want something that could be down to the world to him.Thee sooner treatment starts the less often the cat and making any purchases.

Cat Pee Enzyme Cleaner

He cried non stop for 2 minutes and then wipe it up.It is hard to remove but you are stuck in the household, nor will you make the motions of scratching post.These are two sources for such inquisitive minds the exact cause.There are things you must take the kitty before you get one is likely upset with a paste of baking soda, soak the urine.Next step would be just as sensitive as a scratch-post or mat.

Some cats will happily lay in the house, but there have been lucky with the advice you find a litter box totally.Leaving cat crap scattered across your lawn or urinating in house?Listed below are some examples of items and in promoting the speed of healing.Urine may drench down deep and the cat with interstitial cystitis.And whilst some people have to deal with this problem is ruled out, you may have to share their home, they will not solve the immediate problem.

Removing cat odor with common household cleaners.The new surface is dry, remove the plaque on his behalf.It is a quick, easy and inexpensive to use.The additional trouble is that ammonia is present in the home if you do this, immediately give the cat a chance to crystallize into the stain and odor.Scratching posts- Used to promote them to adjust to its original shape once it has been the case of the bowl and other ear related issues for dogs and people, steroids are tolerated quite well and doesn't fight back.

In this case, obviously knew where the crate and then cats do not appreciate a number of reasons as to keep your cat wants to go where they get into the fur.This will protect her from the bath you apply a different rag to draw out the intended area.Cats misbehave when owners don't advocate using a regular basis take out any tangles and prevent your cat from urinating in the top, and my cats freaks out whenever there is competition for bed space.The condition is caused by flea bites, often causing a characteristic symmetrical hair loss unaccompanied by any other enzyme cleaner to be threatening and fatal as well, including your cat might get it checked by a cat proof your house there is always advisable to show her love or at least one other litter box; we have to heal the infection has spread via his bloodstream through much of their home at the top.This will save you from all such hazards but raises potential problems of a specific protein that forms into crystals when making selections.

All one has claimed the house except in the home too often she may make it enticing and tape them down, you can do to is to have multiple cats, then you may use an accommodating litter box regularly, but not for the shortest time possible.Getting a young cat to be threatening and fatal as well, this new member of the family, or towards people?One effective method to relieve the problem.This way, you will hear their moaning throughout the house very quickly.I know the difference between your cat's urine contains crystals and salts dampen again, with rain or humidity, for example, a Persian or Ragdoll cat.

Things should be provided for all of my cats will take time to time to do this in the majority of fleas on your way back on one side, brushing small sections upward, then smoothing them back anywhere up to 3 days before travelling, you can about your cat has learned to favor the pole, the covering can be placed where you can use.Such repellant is available in pet stores or even un-happiness.Another reason they scratch the furniture and equipment, and finally learn how to help ensure the control of a long and healthy behavior for cats, it has real appeal to your cat.Shampoo the rug or behind something, this will only come out of the house when you catch your cat to play with things around the feet of your own.In reality, they are living with other animals.

Cat Spray Repellent Outdoor

If so, then repeat this process is not a cat will not only for people are pet lovers do not like to get Urinary Tract Infection, and sometimes around the house; approximately in 2-3 places that your pet out of the most looked over and over the floor well, even if they are learning how to get the smell and are passed from one or more cats in your home smell nice.Timing is absolutely essential to potty train it accordingly.Rolling over is cute when a cat owner, are you finding it hard for a few other things that misbehaving cats can be entertaining, loveable, company and I am in no way to insure your cat does not eliminate outside of the accidents.These are usually solved with play therapy.After a few minutes, vacuuming the carpet can be used to being stuck by an allergic reaction in the complex would stop and pet him when he scratches your houseplants, you can see from the wilderness.

In a natural desire to eat greenery and your home is more likely to experience a problem in the atmosphere.All your cat to associate the reward for doing so is by preventing the eggs and larvae in bedding, soft furnishings and around the house while we were not feeling well, the results can be the cause which would need medical attention.I try to break the habit; you must first use rags to remove stains and odors from cat owners and make any changes.Yes, this is good to stimulate nearby males cats.The charm includes a scratching post should hang very nicely.

[imnotanybody]

To the one reading this, may you finally breathe and freely cry without having to explain your pain. 🦋

Photo taken at Pinto Art Museum

As a child, I would remember myself sitting on the floor of my locked room, sometimes, inside my closet, crying and heavily breathing. I could hardly recall the specific reasons for my tears, but all I know is that I was in deep pain, so deep that it nearly teared up my heart literally. I could somehow only recall that the ultimate cause of my pain was my inability to conquer frustrations in my life (yes, even as a kid, I had my fair share of life frustrations) as well as lack of encouragement from the people I looked up to.

My mom and dad would knock on my door, at times, insistently, so I would open it. When they saw me, putting my best efforts to wear a straight face and hide any traces of tears, they would ask, "Bakit ka ba umiiyak? Ano ba ang problema mo, anak?” I would also remember that out of frustration, my dad would forcefully bring me outside our house, lock the front door to prevent me from coming in as a punishment, because I couldn't stop crying. Don't get me wrong. My dad wasn’t a bad father. He loved and continue to love us dearly. It's just that he didn't want to see us crying without any reason. Para kasing tantrums lang. I totally understood him.

But to date, unbeknownst to the people present at that moment, I had my reason -- I got hurt by an insult that made me question, even up to know, my self-worth.

I grew up with many such like episodes in my life - as a kid, a teenager, and even as a young adult. I would cry because I heard someone close to me said that I'm stupid, that I'm not good enough, that I’m ugly, and all those kinds of negativity. I even had actual events where those words were somehow proven to be true to me; so many rejections from people, in school, jobs, etc. I know you will say that I should have just ignored them and should have believed in myself more, but it was indeed easier said than done. For an average kid who did not even know how to express herself, who had a low self-esteem and who used to admire those culprits, it was extremely hard to ignore them. In other words, I believed them. I was even so scared of disappointing them by expressing my hurt. It was like being okay with trying to be okay. And so, I remained that way - OKAY. But little did I know that I had the right to feel what I feel and not be sorry for it.

Going back to my crying episodes, please do not assume that I lived a very sad life -- No, it wasn’t like that. I had many moments that I was happy. I was a happy child. I had hobbies and interests. I had the best, albeit not perfect, family, and I had the best-est friends. It's just that I wished they understood me more, because, we all have the right to feel what we feel and not be sorry for it.

In stating that I had reasons for crying, it was not really them that caused me pain. It was the fact that I was too scared to even talk about those reasons, because people might not understand my pain, and might find me ~too sensitive~. Unlike my thoughts back then, you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

There was one time, in 2019, while a two-year old niece of my sister-in-law (my brother's wife) was vacationing at our house, she used to cry non-stop, and when she was being asked why, she wouldn't respond and would just keep on crying. My brother said then that I used to be like that kid, a ferocious crier without having any reasons at all. But then again, I had my reasons, I had my pain. I then realized that even when as a kid, I adopted this habit of being ashamed of speaking about my pain; maybe because I was too scared to hear these words: "Parang yun lang?" "Ang dami mong arte". I was too afraid to be criticized for being able to feel. Later on, I will tell you, if you are like me then, why you should stop. Besides, you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

Now that I grew older, with many life-changing experiences, I cannot say whole-heartedly that I'm a totally changed person. I would still get hurt-cry-find comfort from others-be criticized-stand back up-comfort myself-be okay. It has become a cycle of coping up for me. There was a slight change, I could say, that is -- I cried less, and I was able to master the art of having my own back. Nonetheless, the fact of still trying to hide my pain remained, and so it is making me difficult to breathe. But do not be like me. Remember, you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

Until now, whenever I have problems, I would shy away from seeking immediate comfort from others. I rarely share my pain to the few whom I trust and love dearly, but still the fear is there, like a shadow visible only under the moonlight. But again, do not let the same fear linger, for you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

Allow me to share one instance that I hope would never happen to you and if it would, I wish for you to handle it differently than I did -- I was betrayed by used to be closest people to me. They were "my people" back then. Naturally, the betrayal caused me pain - that kind of pain I have never imagined I would get to feel in my 9 lives if I were a cat. But hey, life sometimes sucks, right? And it did. The pain worsened not because of the betrayal itself (I believe that has been quite settled) but because of what was done to me thereafter. I was made to appear like a crazy-overthinking witch. In that story, everyone was a victim but me. Hence, most of the battle wounds came from the unfortunate circumstance of making me feel guilty that I got hurt by it. You know - imagine people throwing stones at you and demanding that you apologize to them while you bleed; imagine someone stabbing you with a knife and claiming it was your fault you died, because you kept bleeding; imagine them trying to conceal your wounds they themselves inflicted by leaving you in the dark, so no one would see. There was no choice then but to self-heal. That was how it felt. That is how it feels. This is why you should avoid, by all means, being like me. For this, I owe my mind and my heart a lifetime’s worth of apology. I had to tell myself, "you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it".

Another instance would be everytime I try to speak of my fears and worries, I got too tired and afraid of the typical "Think positive", "Mabuti ka nga ganyan lang ang problema mo", "wag ka kasi ganyan mag-isip". Don't get me wrong. I totally grasp the idea of the need to think big and look at the brighter side of life, and I appreciate the people who try to talk it out with me. It's just that I wish I could have more people who choose to understand more, to tell me instead, "Whatever it is, your emotions are totally valid, and I am here to listen". You have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

I often find myself asking why suicide is committed mostly by those who seemed to have no problems in life. Neither did I realize sooner that the answer is exactly that -- "they seem to have no problems in life". Family, friends, colleagues would see these people smiling and laughing. You might say, "But she appeared to be very happy and seemed to have a perfect life, and she would tell no one of her problems". Sorry, darling, but no. The unstated fact is that she did, she tried to open up, but you didn't take her words for it. She asked for help, but you were blinded by her "perfect" life. Your response to her almost always sounded like, "Just shake it all off" or the dismissive common words, "It could be worse. Just think positive". And so, she chose to laugh her problems all off because to her, no one would understand. She was afraid no one would believe her hurt and no one would see the bleeding. She was asked to explain and justify her pain, but she grew tired of it. And just like that, an internal hemorrhage, it took her life without leaving any mark. But did you know she was going to take her own life? No. In fact, no one knew, not even her. And you were left standing in front of a tombstone full of regrets. So please, do not be like the sad soul of the bearer of a "perfect" life. Cry if you must and know that everything will be alright in time, because you have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

Remember when I said I was too afraid to be criticized for being able to feel? Well, as promised, here is one reason why you should not be: You have the right to feel what you feel and not be sorry for it.

I had become accustomed to the toxic habit of feeling sorry for being hurt, for feeling pain, but do not think about me. I have learned to drink that poison without dying. So unlike me, you may still have time to change this if you happen to see yourself being eaten alive by this very same poison.

Unlike me, do not apologize for being hurt. Your feelings are perfectly valid. Try to be alive as much as you can, and try to own your feelings and emotions. You will get better in time.

Unlike me, be gentle to yourself. Strive to be positive and happy without dismissing the fact that sometimes it is okay not to be okay.

Unlike me, learn to love deeply, but start by loving yourself. You are one loved being created by God, so always trust that He gave you enough strength to love people with all your heart, and that includes yourself. Therefore, if I could give you something that I was able to get from all these, it is that -- you should learn how to have your own back.

Unlike me, always, always protect your heart. I know it is impossible to totally eradicate pain, but as much as possible, shield it from the deadly weapon of blind love and the desire to please others.

Above all, unlike me, know your worth. You are God's child. You are a daughter of a King. Straighten up that crown and be your own warrior. Let that sink in. Because at the end of the day, you are the captain of the ship of your life.

It may have been too late for me, but not for you. And so, tonight I'll pray and to your ear I'll whisper, "May you finally breathe and freely cry without having to explain your pain".

From the kid who used to cry herself to sleep,

TC

P.S. Even if it is too late for me, I want you to know that I did not give up. I chose to "shake it all off" as I intentionally want to be remembered as the one who loves without expecting to be loved in return.

Caveat: The above content does not, in any way, enable being selfish, close-minded, and most importantly, does not encourage suicide. Suicide does not stop the pain. It only passes the pain to others who we love dearly. Besides, all of us have respective stories to tell. The point is, be gentle to yourself. 🖤

05/2020

[princess--cynthia]

SEDUCTION || THREAD ARCHIVE

Participant(s): Cynthia, @deintegro​ / Robin

Words: 7,375

Type: S-Support

Summary: Growing tired of Robin’s apparent idiocy, Cynthia decides to reveal her affections for him in a more direct manner. 

Content Warning: Smut

Cynthia wasn’t known for her patience, and to her credit she had tried this time. Really, she had. But it seemed that Robin’s genius didn’t extend to picking up on social cues in general. Especially when she hadn’t exactly been subtle about it - come on, she’d grabbed his face and said that she didn’t want to lose him. What in Naga’s name did he THINK she meant? Which was why she was now doing something that would give her sister and parents a heart attack if they knew the specifics. Part of blackmailing Severa into silence about the clothes they’d bought together for this was going to bite her in the ass in a few months, but that didn’t matter. Still, at least green lace was flattering on her. …the novelty of lying on her side staring at the door in her smallclothes with a come hither look on her face had faded around one hour in. He must be working late again - gods, that wasn’t healthy. Thankfully she’d remembered his tendency to do that and had brought a book - which she’d finished twenty minutes ago. Now she was just lying on her back and staring at the ceiling, huffing occasionally. He better show up soon, or else she’d have to start rifling through here for books. Finally -finally! - she heard someone step into the tent. Praying that it was just Robin, she turned back onto her side and tossed the covers away, thanking her decision to put her hair down from her normal pigtails for this. “Hey. Want some company?”

Late. Again. Robin was no stranger to long nights, in fact he considered himself to be very well acquainted with the fabled “all-nighter”, but the past few days had proven to be particularly taxing, both physically and mentally. The tactician dragged his feet as he slowly meandered across the small encampment toward his personal tent. Resources while on tour were always stretched thin, but the acting quarter master had always made a point of providing Robin with his  own private living quarters, a luxury that was usually only afforded by the blue bloods among the militia group. For this courtesy, the tactician was most grateful. With his constantly varying work hours and his insomnia, Robin doubted very much that any of the Shepherds would covet having him as a tent mate for very long. With a yawn and a half-hearted stretch, the strategist had reached his destination. With any luck, his mind would be kind and allow for his bed to warmly receive his weary  body for a rare, good night’s sleep. Upon entering the tent, however, it has seemed that someone else has already beaten him to it. “Hey,” Cynthia called out, in a voice that was almost sultry as she lay comfortably on her side in nothing but her small clothes, “Want some company?” An awkward silence ensued as Robin clumsily attempted to make his way through the thick mental fog produced by his fatigue and make any sense of this…situation. His messenger bag slipped from his slumped shoulders and landed on the ground with a dull ’thud’, the sound provoking a moment of lucidity. “C-Cynthia? What are you doing? This…This is my tent,” Robin stammered his normally pale cheeks rapidly taking on colour. This was his tent…right? He couldn’t have been so tired that he made the mistake in entering Cynthia’s…? Right? He found himself staring, for much longer than he intended to actually and this realization only served to fluster the youth even further. “I-I’m really sorry,” he cried, rushing to shield his eyes with his right arm, “I didn’t mean to…,”

“It’s your tent. I snuck in.” Cynthia admitted, standing up and putting perhaps a little more sway in her step than strictly necessary before reaching up to gently pull his arm down, smiling. Well, he hadn’t outright rejected her, so…so far so good. “Besides, there’s nothing to be sorry about. I did this on purpose~”

She didn’t kiss him, he hadn’t consented or anything. That would be crossing a line. But standing there, lips slightly parted and far closer to him than some would deem appropriate, even his idiotic approach to reading other people should tell him what her intentions and desires were.

“What’s wrong, am I the first one you’ve seen like this?”

She was close. Almost too close.

The girl’s proximity sending his already addled mind spinning and his heart racing. Cynthia made no mistake, she had made a point of entering his tent and supposedly, if the tactician heard correctly, choseto  dress like this. “What’s wrong, am I the first one you’ve seen like this?” she asked him, a small smile playing on her plush lips. A part of Robin was glad that her gaze was locked on his face, perhaps then she would fail to notice that his legs were trembling. It had to have been the fatigue - the fatigue and the shock, that had caused his legs to shake so. He didn’t want to admit it, but - if he elected to omit the occasional accident - this was the first time he got to see so much of anyone. Instead of nodding, he swallowed, a naïve part of him hoping that the action would help calm his heart, which, at the moment, was banging ferociously against his rib cage.

Why?

He was certain that given her closeness, that Cynthia could probably hear the damned organ beating herself.

“Why?” he whispered, his voice hoarse, “What are you doing?” The questions were rhetorical. Robin wasn’t so hopeless that he couldn’t put everything together for an answer. The clues had been left out for a while, like a trail of breadcrumbs, but a trail that he refused to follow. It didn’t make any sense. Why would anyone want to get this close?

“Why? Because I wanted to.” Cynthia shrugged, one hand reaching up to cup his face as she frowned, momentarily concerned - maybe he was ill? She shrugged slightly, deciding that it was probably just his nerves rather than an active response to her, hand dropping away from his cheek to tilt her head. “As for what I’m doing? Well…”

She spread her arms and took a step back hopelessly, showing herself off theatrically again. “…I’m trying to seduce you. Seriously, how have you not picked up on that? I’ve been trying for months!”

Maybe she shouldn’t have just come out and said it, but she was getting more than a little frustrated with his confusion and stammered responses. Eventually she had to just cut to the freaking chase.

Robin opened his mouth to reply but nothing came. Instead he lowered his gaze, suddenly finding himself unable to look directly at the woman in front of him, and passed his fingers once through his hair. Of course she was. As much as the tactician tried to deny it, everything leading up to this moment made sense. He thought back to that sunny afternoon on the hill, when the two sat idly beneath a great, leafy, oak tree and exchanged tales from the pages of old books. What Cynthia had said back then stood out clearly in his mind, but now, with her indirect confession, they took on a completely different meaning. Of course.

Of course she didn’t want to lose him. He could never understand it…why anyone would care for him enough to actually love him, but he respected the Pegasus knight enough to avoid invalidating her feelings. “I’m so sorry,” Robin said at last, “I didn’t mean to deny you…I just..,”

“Hello. Half-naked woman, waiting an actual response here.” Cynthia groaned, snapping her fingers in front of the tactician’s face and frowning. Seriously, whatever he was thinking of better not be an excuse that invalidated all of her hard work.

She wouldn’t mind if he didn’t want to be with her. Well, she would, but that was his choice and he deserved to get to make it. What she did mind - legitimately - was that he was making her stand on cold ground, in what was rapidly becoming obvious to her as too lacy smallclothes as she tried desperately to get a reply. “Look, here’s a simpler way of putting it. Do you want to go on a date with me, yes or no. Second question: Do you want to sleep with me, yes or no. Both are on the table here.”

If it was at all possible for his the redness of his burning cheeks to deepen, they would have. Cynthia, to her credit, was never one to mince words, even when it was her intention to tread more lightly about more sensitive topics. It was something that Robin appreciated. It was all too often that others took to enrobing truths with vague, empty words and verbal fluff. Her words forced Robin  out of the web of his own thoughts and returned to him to the present.

The here and now. He was alarmed by the horripilation that was all too apparent on Cynthia’s flesh. A pang of guilt crashing into his chest like a wave. How long had she been like this? Waiting for him barely dressed in an unheated tent on the perimeter of a modest encampment in the Valmese wilderness.  Without a word, Robin shrugged off his robe and gently wrapping the heavy fabric around the girl’s slight shoulders. Still very much as the mercy of his nerves, he pulled Cynthia into a tight and awkward embrace. Cheeks brushed together as Robin moved to speak softly into Cynthia’s ear, “Please,” he began, in a hushed tone that barely broke a whisper, “do promise me that you won’t let me hurt you.”

“Huh? Thanks.” Cynthia blinked, taking the cloak but not quite sure if that was an answer or a distraction while he was thinking. The hug he pulled her into, however, most likely wasn’t.

“Please.” She snorted, nuzzling at his cheek with her head. “If I thought you were going to hurt me, I’d leave you in an instant. No offense.”

It was true - she wasn’t stupid enough to let herself stay in a bad relationship, not twice. At the same time, she wasn’t going to let Robin decide when and how the relationship had turned bad - that was her choice to make, but she’d let him know that if he ever shrugged her off.

Her voice softened, knowing how much the question must have meant to him. “I promise, okay? Now…can you answer mine? Properly, maybe?”

Robin took a moment for himself, to allow for the experience of holding Cynthia so closely to sink in. To take in her scent, her warmth, to strain his senses just enough to catch the sound of her heart beating. A gentle squeeze and a drawn out sigh. The tactician pulled away slightly, and looked down at the girl that he held so closely in his arms. The corners of his lips curled up slightly, into the smallest of smiles and he nodded a few times before finally mustering the courage to accompany the gesture with his voice.

“Y-Yes…I do - very much,” he replied at last.

To have said even that much, felt more energy consuming than the rest of the day had. Robin pulled Cynthia back up against his chest and buried his face in her hair. The faint scent of gardenia lingered in her cobalt locks. Whether or not that was the case or if it was simply a trick of the mind - the result of the strategist coming to associate the woman with the fragrant flower - didn’t matter. The olfactory illusion left his mind in haze, with one foot planted firmly in reality and the other in dreaming.  

“Yay.” Cynthia let out an audible sigh of relief. Well, at least she hadn’t made a complete fool out of herself for nothing, just one that had ended up working. She let herself rest her head against his chest, shuddering under his robe more from the cold than anything else as she breathed him in.

Of course he smelled like paper and that horrible ink they use for maps and journals here in Valm. She had to resist the urge to laugh, really. It was almost too fitting for him. She tilted her head up to look at him as he rested his head in her hair, smiling.

“Hey…you mind if I sleep here tonight? I’m kinda freezing and, uh, I’m on the other side of camp.”

Cynthia’s trembling was easily perceptible even beneath the thick fabric of his cloak and so her words came as no surprise to the tactician. “A-Ah! I’m sorry,” Robin said, suddenly breaking away from the embrace and looking very apologetic. After all, in some ways, it was his fault that she was in such a state. Without really meaning to, he looked the woman over, his gaze not so subtly travelling up and down, out of the corner of his eye.  There was no way Cynthia could go gallivanting about in just that. It was entirely out of the question. For a moment, he wondered where her clothes were, surely she didn’t sneak into his tent in nothing but her small clothes - and certainly not in ones as…provocative as the ones she currently sported. “Of course…you can stay,” he said, “actually, I insist. It’s really chilly after all, and…” Robin let the last of his words evanesce into the dead air of silence, not all too sure of what he was saying himself.  

Her dress was haphazardly hidden under his bed, but there was no point telling him that. It was just detrimental to what she was trying to pull, after all - and that was when a thought came to her mind, Robin’s only warning a surprisingly shark-like smile.

“So, you said yes to the dating bit.” She said, even as she rapidly retreated to the bed and the promised warmth that the blankets gave, dropping his robe casually once her back was turned on him. Glancing back over her shoulder, she couldn’t help but wink at him as she turned. “What about the other bit? Got any energy left?”

Robin should have known from the spark that flashed in Cynthia’s eyes of the dangers that accompanied that fiendish smile of hers. “So, you said yes to the dating bit,” she said a bit too sweetly as she approached his narrow cot. The tactician’s heart seemed to follow the trajectory of his robe, and he felt it sink into the pits of his stomach as the woman tossed the article of clothing onto the floor.  His heart didn’t linger in its position for long, because the teasing look Cynthia that gave him over her shoulder sent it shooting right up into his throat. “What about the other bit? Got any energy left?” “The other bit…?” Robin asked as he trailed after the woman, the meaning behind the Pegasus rider’s words having yet to filter through the syrupy haze of his sleep deprived mind.

A few seconds later, it dawned on him, the realization hitting him like a tonne of tomes. His face took on a vibrant mantle and his legs feeling as though they took on the consistency of jelly. The tactician brought up a hand to cover his mouth, completely beside himself. “I-I’ve never - th-that sort of thi-thing…I-I don’t have any idea,” he stammered, the sheer intensity of his mortification causing him to stumble over his words.

Robin had never even kissed anyone much less…that.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be gentle.” Cynthia ‘assured’ him as she slipped into bed, rolling to face him with a wiggle of her eyebrows. If he didn’t want to go through with it they wouldn’t, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t have fun. “Hey, relax. We don’t need to if you’re going to be uncomfortable.”

It was going to be warmer once he was in the same bed, though, she’d admit that much as she shivered again. Next time, forget the lingerie - she was coming in her actual, fluffy and warm pajamas, regardless of whether or not they looked sexy. She could settle for vaguely cute and warm any day of the week.

“Either way, just hurry up would you? I’m freezing.” She disappeared under his blanket, wondering if he’d be relieved or slightly disappointed that he couldn’t see her body anymore. “Seriously, I’m going to need my tactician-shaped hot water bottle soon.”

The sound of rustling blankets filled the tent as Cynthia slipped into his bed, her slim figure swallowed up by the sheets and vanishing out of sight. Robin sighed, the act of hiding away her figure did help to calm his nerves but a less wholesome part of him of him mourned the “loss” at the back of his mind. While not one to indulge in ones more basal desires, there was no way that the tactician could deny that Cynthia was actually quite attractive. When the burning in his cheeks subsided a little, Robin slowly lowered his hand and smiled gently in response to the woman’s mock whining, “A-Alright, alright,” he said, finally deferring to Cynthia’s request as he went to retrieve his robe from the carpeted tent floor, “Just let me get the lamp first.”   Robin draped his robe over the back of his chair and leaned over to extinguish the flame emitted by the oil lamp that sat on his desk. When the flame was snuffed out a wash of blackness took over the tent, leaving the tactician temporarily blinded until his eyes could acclimate. He didn’t need to wait for his eyes to adjust to catch the dim light of the moon poking at the breaches in the canvas, as Robin had long ago created a mental map of his tent’s layout in his head. He considered him to be an organized person, and so each time the company stopped to camp, his belongings and furnishings would always be placed in their designated location. He took confident steps toward the bed and slowly lowered himself onto the bed’s edge. It felt so foreign with the scantily-clad woman occupying it, a thought that kept his heart racing. As Robin slipped off his boots and deposited them in an orderly fashion at the end of the bed, but even in the dark he could have sworn that he felt Cynthia’s eyes on him. “This is…it’s alright isn’t it?” He could only take solace in the fact that at least in the dark, Cynthia would not be able to catch him blushing.

“Of course it’s alright.” Cynthia sighed, rolling her eyes helplessly. Some people just couldn’t take a hint, it seemed - much less roll with the punches once they started coming. Really, what else did he want her to do or say? She’d already given pretty express consent. She sat up and wrapped her arms around him from behind as he tugged off his boots, nuzzling at the crook of his neck before leaving a teasing kiss there.

“Seriously, Robin. Nobody’s going to flip out at you for this - well, except for my father and probably Lucina as well.” She hadn’t really thought that through, but just shrugged and dismissed it out of hand. “Come on, come to bed. You’re going to need to get some sleep, if nothing else.”

Robin heard Cynthia moving about behind him, the mattress groaning ever so slightly with the shifting of her weight. From behind him, a pair of slender arms snaked their way about his torso causing the youth to momentarily stiffen. He found himself nervously gripping at the bed sheets with clammy hands, trying in vain his hardest not to shiver as the woman’s warm breath rolled out in waves over his skin as she nuzzled against his neck. Then there was that distinctive sensation of soft, hot lips pressing exposed flesh that elicited a feeble sounding gasp from the tactician. Robin gently unhooked the arms wrapped about his waist just enough for him to turn to face his partner half-way. His palms hovered awkwardly over Cynthia’s skin for a moment, before finally settling down to rest on her shoulders. It wasn’t a novel experience, for Robin to suddenly feel less able to sleep when the lights went out - but this was different. Robin let out a shaky sigh as he lightly ran his hands along the contours of Cynthia’s shoulders and arms, a twang of guilt manifesting in his chest when he felt how cool to the touch she was. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, brushing the his knuckles loving against the woman’s cheek, “I’m really terrible.” He caught a stray lock of cobalt hair between his finger tips and tucked it behind Cynthia’s ear. The change didn’t require much effort on her part, but Cynthia really looked different with her hair down, Robin couldn’t help but feel that this was almost representative of Cynthia’s variable personality. They may not have known one another for years, but Robin knew enough of the girl to know that there was much more to her being than the spunky hero persona she pushed so much. His other hand travelled upward, his finger tips trailing across the length of her clavicle and slowly up, up, up, along her neck. Robin cupped Cynthia’s face his in hands, a hoarse laugh escaping his lips as he trembled.

“G-Gods…”

“You’re not terrible, you’re inexperienced. We’ve all been there.” Cynthia smiled, leaning into his hands as he cupped her face. She was cold, sure, but it wouldn’t be that way for much longer. Besides, she’d suffered through much worse than a slight draft.

“Gods what?” She raised an eyebrow, sliding forwards slightly as he laughed nervously. “That better be a prayer of thanks, you know. Or else I’ve wasted a lot of time building up to this.”

Before he could reply she pressed his lips against hers, softly at first as if to ease him into it before strengthening it as one hand bunched up his shirt and practically pulled him forward. A slight gasp slipped past her lips as she did so, displaying an amount of skill that certainly would have raised eyebrows from anyone that didn’t know her private life very well.

She could only hope that Robin didn’t see it as a bad thing.

A flinch and a muffled gasp accompanied the kiss. Cynthia had taken the initiative and did what Robin was too afraid to do - to take the plunge and bridge the physical distance that lay between them. Without any recollection of what is was like to kiss someone, the tactician didn’t quite know what to expect, but it didn’t take him too long to form an opinion of the experience. The sensation of the woman’s pillow-y lips gently pressed against his sent a shiver shooting up his spine and left his skin crawling with goose bumps.

One of Cynthia’s hands had made its way up to his chest, her fingers curling inward as she clutched Robin’s shirt. The youth offered no resistance when she tugged at his shirt and pulled him in closer to deepen the kiss. Quivering fingers slipped between azure tresses as Robin’s hands moved to cradle the nape of Cynthia’s neck.   Then he remembered…that he needed to breathe. With considerable reluctance, the tactician broke away from the kiss and inhaled sharply. His cheeks burned as the embarrassment set in. Cynthia already acknowledged his inexperience as something that was both expected and natural, but Robin couldn’t help but feel stupid. His eyes had since adjusted to the dark. The light of the moon that crept into the tent through open seams cast the faintest glow on the pegasus rider, and the tactician could make out a rough outline of her body’s contours.

“A-Ah, I’m sorry…I suppose that I forgot myself for a moment there,” he mumbled his gaze falling to the mattress. In his chest his heart still pounded relentlessly and his insides of his stomach still hitched with each wave of adrenaline. It was something that Robin was ashamed to admit…but while he was certainly no expert in the matter, in his opinion, Cynthia was amazing.

“That was forgetting yourself?” Cynthia couldn’t help but giggle a little at how…well, innocent he was. “Robin, please. This is what happens when someone forgets themselves.”

She shoved his shoulders so that he fell down onto his back, crawling up his chest and taking care to rub herself against him whenever possible just to get a shiver from the tactician. She pressed her lips against his again, as firm as last time, with one hand on the back of his head forcing him to lean into the kiss.

That was when she opened her mouth slightly and slipped her tongue between his lips, letting out a slight moan as she explored his mouth. Gods, she wished she could see his face right now. It must be amazing.

Pale brows knotted to reflect Robin’s confusion at Cynthia’s laughter. It was a bright, girlish laugh, very much like the twittering of birds, or the tinkling of silver in a clear pool. “I’m sorry Cynthia, but I don’t really–” a small cry escaped the tactician’s lips, abruptly cutting his reply short, when the woman seized him by the shoulders and gave him a firm push.

He then found himself lying supine on the bed facing the canopy of canvas hanging over head, one leg dangling over the edge. Before Robin could hope to correct his position, Cynthia was already on top of him, her lithe frame slithering along his body. As she travelled up to meet his face, the hem of Robin’s shirt ended up catching the lip of one of Cynthia’s bra cups and road up his torso, leaving his chest bare and expose. He couldn’t help but shudder, every time the Pegasus rider’s skin came into contact with his. There he was, caught on the border of mortification and lust, his stomach tingling with a fresh surge of adrenaline. The sensation could only be compared to the startling jolt around the navel region that one experiences during a sudden hypnagogic jerk.

Before Robin could dwell on the feeling for much longer, Cynthia initiated another kiss. Her lips felt hot against his and this time, the kiss seemed to carry more of a primal quality to it, as if the woman was driven by a ravenous hunger of another kind. Her moan sent minute vibrations abuzz in his mouth and caused the tactician’s heart to pulse frantically. As she used her hands to force him even deeper into the oral embrace, Robin had no choice but to mirror the motions of her lips.

There was a muffled gasp and a sharp intake of breath when Robin felt Cynthia’s tongue slide past his lips and enter his mouth. He lay frozen and temporarily dumbstruck as she mapped the interior of his mouth with her tongue. She ran her tongue over his palette and hungrily caressed his tongue with her own, as if she intended to drink in every single detail and eventually consume him.

Robin allowed his heavy eyelids to fall shut. In temporarily surrendering his sight his other senses gradually became more acute. The warmth of their breaths as they inhaled and exhaled through their noses. The scent of Cynthia’s hair and skin occupying Robin’s nostrils and sending his mind into free fall. The heat emanating from her smooth skin. The rushed pulses of his heart that sent blood rushing to his ears. He wanted to embrace her. Hold her evening tighter.

Always closer. Closer. Closer.

Gods it was too much.

“That’s losing yourself.” Cynthia said again, panting slightly when she finally broke away from him. Realizing that his shirt had gotten caught in her bra, she shrugged and sat upright - intentionally grinding back on his hips with her own as she did so - and unclasped the bra, letting it drop to the side with a smile. He probably couldn’t see much in the moonlight, but in a way that just made it better.

She let her hands trail over his chest, tilting her head with a raised eyebrow as she felt his heartrate. In some ways, that was a bigger compliment than the obvious would have been.

“Say something, then? Unless I’ve broken you.” Her head tilted the other way as her hands strayed down and started slowly undoing his belt, letting the gradual movements tease him as her fingers brushed against his bare waist by ‘accident’. “Which, sure, might be a thing…”

The belt dropped to the floor and she wrapped her hands around the top of his pants, fingers digging into his flesh slightly as she leaned in to press another kiss - this time, brushing her lips along his chin before stopping next to his ear.

“Do you want to do more?” She purred, nibbling an earlobe for a scant second before pulling away. “Or do you want to stop?”

Robin reluctantly opened his eyes when Cynthia’s lips parted from his. Breathless, he gazed longingly at the girlish face of the woman who hovered over. She could pry as much as she like, but Robin was completely at a loss for words. The sound of their pants, while hushed, stood out clearly against the thick silence that filled the tactician’s small tent. There was the snap that announced the unfastening of a bra, the faint clinking of metal, a collection of helpless gasps brought on by fingers tasting flesh, and the dull thud of leather hitting the carpeted floor. With her body outlined by the silver light of the moon, Cynthia moved with a certain degree of confidence, like that of a skilled predator pursuing its prey.

When her fingers grazed his bare skin as they curled about the waist of his pants, Robin could not help but squirm. She had to know what she was doing to him. This couldn’t have been by accident. A noise falling somewhere between a moan and a gasp tumbled out from between Robin’s semi-parted lips when Cynthia leaned in for another kiss, her knuckles rolled in against his lower abdomen and her exposed breasts pressed against his chest with the shifting of her weight. The kiss was short lived, almost teasing. Her lips migrated from the youth’s mouth to his chin, and then made an airy trail along his jaw line and up toward his ear.

He couldn’t tell if he had just begun shaking, or if he had been shaking all along, but he was certain that Cynthia words did nothing to help matters. “Do you want to do more?” she whispered, her voice practically dripping with lust.

Robin completely lost it when his lover’s lips closed around his earlobe, her teeth gently clamping down on the surprisingly erogenous area. He grimaced, forced his eyes shut and rushed to flatted the back of his hand against his mouth in a sad attempt to stifle his moans. “Or do you want to stop?”

Stop?

This was something that Cynthia worked toward for months, and yet she was willing to stop for his sake. The tactician lay motionless for a few moments, save the slight rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. Robin exhaled deeply, as though letting go of a great burden and wrapped his arms about Cynthia’s slight frame, pulling her in close. He couldn’t face her as he was, and so he buried his face into the crook of her neck, so close that his eyelashes would brush against her skin whenever he blinked, and nodded timidly. He was safe like this. “Pl-Please,” he whispered, “I want…I want to be able to do this for you, but I’ve never done this before…a-and I don’t know how. I’m sorry, I’m truly inexperienced, but to compensate, please use me as you desire.”

“Alright. Tell me if you want to stop.” Cynthia told him again, kissing his cheek before reaching over to grab his hands. She let her fingers wrap around his for a moment, lips brushing against his, before she pulled them towards her. “Come on, you can touch. Give it a try.”

Resting his hands on her chest - and holding them there for a moment so that he knew this was okay, gods he was being thick right now - she pulled down his trousers, rolling her hips against his again and grinning when she felt him.

“Not long now…” She muttered, sliding her smallclothes off and resting just above his waist, completely naked as she tilted her head. “Are you ready?”

Robin swallowed nervously when Cynthia pressed his hands against her chest. With her bare breasts resting in the palms of his hands, he could feel her nipples growing erect. Gingerly, he tentatively circled his thumb pads about the firm tissue, kneading the woman’s breasts with his free fingers. He could feel the blush on his cheeks darken as a less than pure image bobbed up to the surface of his thoughts. There was this strange, almost carnal desire to close his lips around Cynthia’s nipples, to suck them, to nibble, to caress her skin lovingly with his tongue and to taste her flesh. The Gods were kind to have the couple shrouded in darkness, for Robin feared that in the light, the look on his face would give everything away.

The intensity and nature of his thoughts only escalated when Cynthia pulled down his trousers, sliding the article of clothing over his hips, down past his trembling thighs and leaving them to rest around his knees. He lay under her, completely unveiled, the erection that had previously decided to pitch a tent in his trousers now painfully out in the open.  Before Robin could fret over his exposed state or mourn the withdrawal of Cynthia’s chest from his hands, he keened when she grinded her hips against his groin. “Not long now…” she purred seductively as she slipped out of her smallclothes and straddled the tactician, her thighs resting on either side of his waist.

Cynthia was completely naked, and yet in the dark it appeared as though she were clad in a raiment of shadow and moonlight. Her outline and contours were clearly defined, but the darkness still left enough to the imagination. In some ways, Robin found it to be much more alluring. There was always a certain degree of mystery in the dark. It was a challenge that had always appealed to him. Together they would cut through the shroud of uncertainty and highlight that which lay beneath it all. A curtain of sapphire hair fell away from Cynthia’s face as she cocked her head suggestively to one side. “Are you ready?”

Robin reached for the woman with his hands, the tips of his fingers landing at the base of her rib cage before slowly trailing down her stomach. “I…I love you very much Cynthia…I hope that you know,” he stated softly as he passed his fingers over her hipbones and along the top of her thighs.

“While doing this…I want to be able to make sure that it feels as good for you as possible.”

He paused, the silence only penetrated by the sound of their breaths and the occasional faint groan of the cot mattress whenever Cynthia shifted her weight. The corner of Robin’s lips jerked up into a weak smile, “I want you. I want to please you. Please teach me.”  

“Don’t worry.” Cynthia purred again, gasping as his fingers curved around her breasts. It had been a while since she’d had a partner be so…well, gentle with her. One night stands didn’t exactly equate to lovemaking. It was nice.

“I love you too.” She grinned, running one hand along his erection before raising her hips and guiding him to her entrance, breathing heavily. “Don’t worry, I’ll do all the work. Just tell me when you’re close, I really don’t need to get pregnant…”

She slowly lowered herself onto him with small gasps and moans of pleasure, closing her eyes and biting her lips as she moved. One hand rested on his chest, slowly curling into a fist while the other one moved from his crotch to her own chest, kneading a breast as she finished sinking onto him. Once she was finally - finally - down to the hilt she leaned forwards to press a light kiss on his lips, grinning.

“How does it feel?”

The sensation was unlike anything he had ever experienced. It was an all encompassing feeling, one that threatened to swallow him whole if he allowed it - and allow it he did. Overwhelmed, Robin squirmed beneath Cynthia, his fingers clutching desperately at his bed sheets as she slowly lowered herself onto him. The warmth and wetness came as a surprise to the youth, who now fought to suppress the urge to moan that came with each of Cynthia’s minute muscular contractions, as she slid further down along his length.

The sight of her groping her own chest and the noises that accompanied the motion were nearly enough to drive him over the edge. The racing of his heart prior to this moment was nothing in comparison to the arterial gallop he endured at present. She had rested one hand on his chest, her nails lightly grazing his skin as fingers curled inward to form a fist. There was no way that she could have missed how frantically his heart clamoured against his chest.

Robin closed his eyes and let out a long, shuddering, gasp when Cynthia had finally taken in all of him. The muscles between his shoulders tensing slightly as his neck arched slightly and his head titled back. He felt her hair spilling onto his shoulders as she leaned in for a light kiss. Before he could return the kiss with one of his own, he felt Cynthia’s lips curving into a smile. “How does it feel?” she asked, a hint of anticipation colouring her voice.

Where did one even begin? In the messy fog of his senses, Robin had determined that the question had to be a rhetorical one. She knew how he must be feeling. She had to. Robin parted his lips to utter a reply, only to let out a pathetic noise that came off as a mix between a moan and a whimper.    

“That good, huh?” Cynthia groaned, hands resting flat on his chest as she slowly started to move her hips, arching her back and closing her eyes as she let out another soft moan. As long as he remembered to warn her, she’d be fine. Hells, she wouldn’t even mind not finishing - just tonight, at least.

It was likely a good thing that she wasn’t approaching him as roughly as she normally did, from his reactions it seemed like the tactician wouldn’t be able to handle it. Instead she focused on long, slowly motions - raising and sinking her hips along his length with what to her was almost painful speed.

“Touch me.” She whispered, guiding one hand to her rear and the other to her waist as she kept moving. “Feel me out, Robin…don’t be afraid. I want it.”

“Touch me,” she whispered, her tone was almost imploring.

While settling into a steady yet gentle pace, Cynthia took hold of Robin’s wrists and desperately positioned his hands on her person, “Feel me out,“ she pleaded, "Robin…don’t be afraid. I want it.”

Much like a deer in head lights, Robin froze for a few moments, at a complete loss at how to proceed. He struggled to think, but it proved to be quite difficult to keep his head above water as he was met with waves of pleasure that came about with the rhythmic grinding of Cynthia’s hips.

To his relief, however, his hands moved on their own, as if guided by pure instinct. The hand that had once occupied the pegasus knight’s waist, had now drifted to her rear. His fingers hungrily dug into the ample flesh as his arms strained in time with her motions, pulling her toward him in an attempt to deepen each thrust. This wasn’t enough. His body craved more. He wanted her as close to him as possible. He wanted her entirely.

"Cynthia please…please”

“Please?” Cynthia tilted her head, a slight gasp coming from her mouth. Well if that wasn’t permission, she didn’t know what was. She rested her hands on his chest to steady herself as she pulled her back straight, taking a deep breath before smiling. “Well, alright…”

She abandoned her slower pace entirely, becoming more aggressive than she had earlier as she started bouncing up and down on his lap. Every bounce ended in an audible smack of flesh, and the woman groaned in pleasure, her nails digging into Robin’s chest slightly as her hands curved.  

“B-better?” She asked through another gasp, staring into his eyes. At this rate, she might break the poor man.

Robin could have sworn that for an instant, he had caught a glimpse of a glimmer passing over his lover’s eyes. Perhaps it was a mistake for him to have begged Cynthia for more  - but there was no time for him to retract his wishes, that and the fact that a primal part of him certainly welcomed whatever more the woman had to offer. The slow and gentle pace she had set previously had been discarded entirely and was now replaced by a fervent rhythm. “Cynthi–Oh Gods!” Robin whispered sharply after a shuddering intake of breath.

That he was able to properly form his words, let alone find the space to breathe between his desperate cries, was a miracle. Robin’s heart ran much too quickly for him to count the beats as his pulse had been reduced to a constant string of drumming. Although his fingers frantically grabbed at his bed sheets, they found no purchase and Robin was pitched wholly into the deluge of overwhelming sensation. His hands now found themselves on the small of Cynthia’s back, his nails raking at the while flesh and leaving a trail of bright pink welts in their wake.

The volume of his moans afforded the man a few moments of clarity and he suddenly grew self conscious and attempted to silence himself by closing his lips about his wrist and biting down. Being overhead quickly became a secondary concern however when Robin noticed the muscles in along his thighs twitch spastically as he approached his limit. He released his wrist from his mouth,  placed his hands on Cynthia’s thighs and pushed against them weakly.

“I-I don’t think - I can any l-longer,” he breathed.

Cynthia laughed lightly at Robin’s reaction, especially when he actually ended up biting his wrist to stay quiet. It wasn’t mocking, just…amused. The poor man was so clearly out of his depth that it was rapidly becoming kind of hilarious to her. She ran one hand along his cheek, cupping it slightly even as she continued to build up speed.

“Robin, gods…” She mumbled, breath hitching in her throat as she tried to speak. It wasn’t to last, sadly, and the instant that Robin warned her she slid off of him with practiced ease.

“Yeah. Let’s not do the kids thing yet.” She smiled, planting a quick kiss on his lips before sliding down his body. She took a brief moment to reflect on the very real possibility that Robin hadn’t even heard of a blowjob before, before shrugging and deciding to keep going anyway. Her lips wrapped around his tip, head bobbing up and down - just slightly. She wanted to keep some of her skills a surprise for later, all she was aiming for was to finish him off. She pulled away once he climaxed, not letting him see the results as she dabbed her face clean. Glancing up at him, she wasn’t surprised to see him already lapsing into sleep, a smile on her face. 

“Heh. We can work on your stamina another time.” She giggled, crawling along his body and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Night, Robin. See you in the morning...”