#and as long as nothing like my skull or pelvis or a really important bone gets taken

[wormy-business]

I saw this question posed on tiktok, but I think Tumblr would really enjoy it too.

If a fae creature offered to give one million dollars for a bone FROM YOUR BODY chosen at random, how many bones would you allow them to take?

Light clarifications; The fae is not the one choosing the bones. The bone is taken at random. Each bone, no matter the size or importance, is worth a full million dollars. You must also declare the exact number first, you can't go bone-by-bone. You either say 2 or you say 10, you can't work your way up to a higher number. The bones are removed instantaneously, and the money is given immediately as well. You will not get in government trouble for acquiring the money.

Tell me in the tags/replies how many bones you'd let the fae take. And as always, reblog for bigger sample size.

[popatochisssp]

Working Out the Kinks (Kinktober 2018) 7/31

Day 7: Praise-kink | Body Swap | Aphrodisiacs | Incest

Pairing: UT!Papyrus/Reader, background implications of Alphyne (not enough to tag for)

Additional Kinks: Slight strength kink

AO3 Link

“A-again, I’m so sorry, you guys, I’m working on it, I s-swear, it should, um…it should only be another c-couple of……hours?”

“IT’S PERFECTLY ALRIGHT, ALPHYS,” Papyrus assures the stuttering lizard through the speaker phone. “WE’RE BOTH FINE AND THAT’S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING! WE CAN MOST CERTAINLY WAIT FOR A SAFE REVERSAL.”

It’s a bit of a surreal experience for you having to watch your boyfriend’s mannerisms play out on your own body—the way he broadly gestures with your hands and how he cocks your hip out just so.

Of course, it was a lot more bizarre for you to be in his body, without any of the skin or muscles or organs you tended to take for granted.

You suppose you signed up for this kind of weirdness when you started dating a skeleton monster in the first place, but an accidental full-soul-swap from an experimental device in Alphys’ lab hadn’t exactly been on your radar of, ‘What To Expect When Boning A Skeleton.’

But you know it definitely was an accident and you hate for poor Alphys to feel so bad about it, so you put your two cents in as well. “Yeah, don’t rush, Al, we’re okay. Just take your time and figure it out, nobody’s in a hurry.”

“…gosh, you t-two are so sweet. I’ll g-get back to work and Sans said he’d stop by to help soon, so…! It really shouldn’t be that much longer. Ganbatte!”

And with that she hung up the phone.

You sighed, your…ribcage? expanding and contracting and you had no idea how that was happening without a muscular system, to say nothing of the lungs you definitely didn’t have right now to hold a breath.

“Godspeed, you funky little otaku,” you mutter. “How are you holding up, Papyrus?”

You turned and your eye-sockets went wide at the sight of Papyrus with his…your hand up your shirt.

“Uhhh… what are you doing?!”

“IS IT NOT OBVIOUS?” Papyrus wondered innocently. “I WAS WONDERING ABOUT THE SENSITIVITY OF YOUR NIPPLES. I’VE NEVER HAD NIPPLES MYSELF, NOW SEEMS LIKE THE PERFECT TIME TO INVESTIGATE!”

“Does it really?” you wonder. “When we’re both having a literal out-of-body experience?”

“YES, EXACTLY!” Papyrus raised an eyebrow at you—he’d gotten the hang of manipulating your facial muscles quick. “HAVEN’T YOU EVER BEEN CURIOUS ABOUT MY BODY?”

You……definitely had, you’ve been very curious.

“WELL, NOW YOU’RE IN IT! AND WE’RE STUCK THIS WAY FOR A FEW HOURS, POSSIBLY ANOTHER DAY OR SO IF ALPHYS IS ACTUALLY WAITING ON MY LAZY BROTHER TO FIX THE MACHINE. WE MIGHT AS WELL HAVE SOME FUN WITH IT WHILE WE CAN!”

You think you know where he’s going with this, but just to be sure… “You want to get freaky?”

“I’M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!” Papyrus exclaimed. “YES, THAT SOUNDS LIKE A WONDERFUL IDEA!”

Of course it did, it was his idea.

“THINK ABOUT IT,” he coaxes, “I’D BE ABLE TO FIND OUT ALL OF THE ABSOLUTE BEST THINGS YOUR BODY LIKES BECAUSE I’D BE EXPERIENCING IT FIRSTHAND—AND VICE VERSA!”

Oh. ………Oh.

Papyrus looks at you very seriously. “BECAUSE OF THIS ONE LITTLE MISHAP,” he says, “WE COULD VERY WELL BECOME THE GREATEST LOVERS IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. I MEAN, WE WERE ALREADY PRETTY GOOD BEFORE, BUT I THINK THIS WOULD DEFINITELY PUT US OVER THE TOP!”

“You don’t think this is an inappropriate use of Alphys’ technology?”

Papyrus scoffs. "OH, PLEASE, LIKE THIS ISN’T EXACTLY WHAT IT WAS DESIGNED FOR? ALPHYS JUST EXPECTED THE FIRST TRIAL WOULD BE SHUFFLING SCALES INSTEAD OF RATTLING BONES!"

You laugh a little, but…hell, he’s got a point. “Okay, okay, you talked me into it, go nuts.”

Papyrus does a fist-pump that makes him (you?) look positively adorable and dives right in.

There’s something endearing that the second thing he tries in your body is a dramatic hair-flip, but the third thing…

“Hey, wait a minute, don’t spank my ass!”

Papyrus smirks up at you. “WHY NOT? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?”

The angle of that cocky little look makes it finally, really click for you.

You’re in Papyrus’ body: you’re bigger than him.

A fact you test out with much delight by simply reaching down, picking him up, and plopping him down onto the kitchen counter with ease.

Papyrus looks at you with wide, startled eyes that you’d only ever seen before in a mirror. He has a hand to your chest like he’d be clutching his pearls if you’d been wearing any when you switched.

“OH MY GOODNESS,” he breathes. “YOUR BODY REALLY LIKED THAT.”

You really liked it, too. You can feel Papyrus’…your magic stirring in your soul, coalescing in your pelvis, and you think the grin you warp Papyrus’ skull with must look positively feral.

You hope Alphys is taking a good, long anime-break right about now.

You’re gonna try to give Papyrus’ dick some ‘extra features’ that you just know your body will love.

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