#and are in fact very difficult to ignore today
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turns out repressing every single emotion I feel was a load bearing kind of thing. who knew.
#me.txt#I have cried. so fucking much these past two days. i spent so much of today just crying all the time#love this therapy shit. sooooo helpful#I��m genuinely unsure what the fuck is going to happen this week#it’s going to be difficult enough if I don’t start fucking crying every fifteen seconds#I’ve also not been able to shake thinking of dying At All today <3#is this karma for lying about having suicidal thoughts. that’s kind of funny actually#but there was no way in hell I was telling that woman about those. i have no idea what the consequences would have been#maybe there wouldn’t have been anything. but if there had been. ooooh boy#plus it’s not like I’m actually at risk I would never have the guts but like#the thoughts Do exist lol#and are in fact very difficult to ignore today#which makes me feel like the worst fucking excuse of a human being on this planet god bless#god I need a fucking nap. maybe a new brain. to get over myself already probably Jesus fucking Christ girl#I’m so fucking tired. I’m so goddamn tired of it all#there’s no way out of this because no matter what I do I’m still there#it’s still /me/ and that’s the goddamn problem isn’t it? me. that’s the problem
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⋆.ೃ࿔* ── 𝐃𝐈𝐘-𝐃𝐀𝐃!
it’s career day, and megumi has to bring his dad to school so he can tell the class about his job. the problem? he only has a 20-year-old sorcerer-guardian who has the brain capacity of a walnut.
content. canon divergence (suguru’s alive and studying to be a kindergarten teacher), possible ooc characters, female!reader.
notes. guys i’m a sucker for satoru who really, really tries and isn’t just a goofy man-child ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -。꒱ྀི১ also ! thank you all for your patience, it took me a while to finish this piece bc of uni, so i'm vv happy it's finally done <3
taglist. | masterlist.
“I don’t have a dad.”
As cruel as it may be, a part of Megumi hopes that the sentence makes his teacher greatly uncomfortable. Demanding for a father to attend a Career Day at school simply isn’t fair to children without one—or, well, to the child without one. It’s not his fault his father hauled ass and left, so why is she making this so difficult for him?
“Oh,” she mumbles. It seems his arrow hit the target, as her eyebrows pull together in a frown and she shifts her weight between her feet. “Well, you, uh, have a male guardian, don’t you?”
Megumi grimaces. Instantly, he thinks back to last week. Satoru Gojo, self-proclaimed strongest, had hit his head on a kitchen cabinet. With a dramatic pout and an overexaggerated wobble to his lips, he clung to you for hours. Some affection will make it all better!
Of course, when Megumi criticised his skills surrounding his infinity technique—because, really, how couldn’t it block a simple cabinet—the sorcerer opted to ignore him. He suspects there was some foul play at hand.
“Barely,” he mutters, as the memory resurfaces.
His teacher lets out a startled hum. “I’m sorry?”
“Nothing,” Megumi says quickly. He watches as she starts typing on her computer, and the realisation that she’s probably currently taking a look at his file isn’t a particularly welcome one. “What about my other guardian? Can I bring her, instead?”
“This event is geared towards fathers,” she explains. It’s obvious she forgot her reading glasses today, Megumi thinks, as she needs to narrow her eyes to read the screen in front of her. “I have one Satoru Gojo noted down as your male guardian. Surely, he will be able to attend.”
Megumi pauses. He blinks up at her expressionlessly, and fights off the urge to push his teacher down a well. You often preach about being kind to others, and that wouldn’t be very kind.
“Can’t I take my oth—”
“I’m afraid not,” she interrupts him before he even gets the sentence out. It irks him. Megumi isn’t fond of speaking to begin with, so when he does, he’d prefer not to be cut off halfway through. “An exception will not be made. Please, make sure to bring Gojo-san to school.”
Megumi briefly, and for the very first time ever, mourns the fact that you and Satoru weren’t married. A small part of him calls the man a coward for not asking you to. If he’d simply taken the step, then Megumi would be able to pass you off as Gojo-san. Unfortunately, he can’t, and it’s becoming increasingly clear that there’s no way around this problem.
“Fine,” he grumbles. It takes all of his remaining willpower to not stomp out of the classroom. Once again, he thinks of you. It’d be extremely bad manners. He can’t find it in himself to wish his teacher a nice day this time, though, and so she’ll have to make due with a slightly less polite Megumi for today.
There’s nothing he can do about it. Satoru will have to come to the school.
Megumi suddenly despises the idea of Career Day.
“I need you to come to my school next week.”
Immediately, all chatter around the dining table stops. For once, Megumi finds himself annoyed at the sudden appearance of silence. Before he said it, he knew his words would most likely have such an effect—he just didn’t expect it to be so instant.
He tries his best to feign nonchalance, as if the topic that’s coming up didn’t make him feel stressed-out beyond belief. The confused, startled glances you and Satoru share don’t do much to help him, either. Perhaps it’s because Megumi is looking straight at him; him instead of you. Yeah, Satoru, he isn’t a fan of it, either.
“Me?” The man asks then, and Megumi has to resist the urge to say, ‘no, I meant the snail in the backyard—yes, you,’ in the most sarcastic voice he can muster up. Satoru once again steals a look at you, ever so oblivious to Megumi's mental remarks. “Don’t you mean—”
“I don’t,” Megumi cuts him off solemnly. His lips are pursed shut, and he pokes the slices of pork belly in his bowl with his chopsticks. One didn’t need to be of particularly high intelligence to notice the boy’s displeasure. “I have to bring a male figure for Career Day.”
It’s slow, the morphing of Satoru’s face, but it happens gradually and doesn’t stop until he’s positively beaming. Megumi doesn’t like it one bit. Nothing good happens when he looks like that, and he’s quite sure that all that will spew out of his mouth in a few seconds will be nothing except for pure nonsense.
“Well, luckily, I will have the day off, then!” Satoru chimes, with a smile so wide it causes two dimples to appear on his cheeks. You copy his smile, and gently go to poke the little dent in his skin—Satoru lets you, as he always does. Megumi would think of it as cute if he weren’t so annoyed. “I will be there.”
It seems he was right. Satoru’s words are pure nonsense.
“I didn’t tell you when,” he comments dryly.
The sorcerer blinks. His smile is still on his face, but it’s fading, and the dimples do so with it. Your hand hovers halfway in the air, stuck with nothing to poke, and you slowly bring it back down to your side. It seems neither of you had taken time to think about that small fact—Megumi blames Satoru for dragging you down with him; him and those indentations in his cheek that you always seem to coo over.
“Oh,” Satoru mumbles. A crease between his brows forms as his brain hurries to catch up with the newfound information. A few seconds pass, and then the previous bravado returns. “Well, it doesn’t matter! I can take the day off. When do you need me? Tell me, and I’ll be there.”
Megumi very much doubts he can take days off all willy-nilly like that, especially after he pushed his workload onto someone else to attend his science fair last time, but then again, what does he know? If Satoru didn’t care about the consequences of his actions, then Megumi wasn’t about to break his own head doing so, either.
“Next Friday,” he mumbles. From the tone of his voice, it’s quite clear that he’d rather be saying anything else. “We have to leave at eight a.m., please, be on time.”
“Sure thing!” Satoru chimes, and with that, Megumi thinks the dreaded conversation has finally come to an end.
All in all—it could’ve gone worse. At least Satoru didn’t prolong it unnecessarily. Nor did he add a bunch of relentless teasing. He glances at the sorcerer. Satoru is happily munching on the dinner you’d prepared, both his cheeks stuffed full with entirely too much rice. It’s unbecoming, and a reflection of his poor manners, Megumi thinks, and he doesn’t understand how you look at the man with such hearts in your eyes.
Though, your more than adequate cooking seems to have saved him from one of Satoru’s onslaughts. He’s grateful. Even if he doesn’t particularly enjoy the sight in front of him.
“Hey, ‘toru?” You ask, breaking the silence with a slight hesitation to your voice. It nearly sounds nervous, and both Megumi and Tsumiki look up in alarm. Satoru hums, still chewing away. “What are you going to tell the class?”
Satoru stops eating. His chewing comes to a halt, and his chopsticks freeze in the air. A slice of pork drops from between them, and falls back into his bowl—It’s not hard to see the cogs turning in his head. “Uhm, I. . .” He swallows the food still in his mouth, and clears his throat.
Right. It’s Career Day—but Satoru can’t tell a bunch of seven to eight-year-olds that he hunts and kills grimy, ugly, and freakishly scary curses for a living, now, can he? Megumi doesn’t think that would go over well with the other parents. The boy sighs. It’s just one thing after another. He grimly believes the world might just be out to get him.
“I. . .Oh! I can tell them I’m a teacher,” his guardian scrambles for a solution, and Megumi can’t help but think it’s a little lack-lustre. Who would believe that guy is a teacher, anyway? Then again. . .Megumi doesn’t know a better fix for their current problem, either. He was so focused on the fact that it was Satoru that had to come to the school, he all but forgot about the fact that the dear thorn-in-his-side didn’t possess a normal job. “Suguru has told me a thing or two about his internship. I can take inspiration from there.”
Ah, yes. The famed Suguru Geto. Megumi has met him before. He hasn’t actually spoken to him, however. The man often visits, and has twin girls clinging to him when he does, and while Tsumiki seems to really like him—and them—Megumi doesn’t have an interest in seeking out some form of interaction, yet. Whenever he comes over, Megumi opts to hide in his room. Suguru never tries to disturb him, nor does he try to coax him into coming out. He’s very grateful for it.
So, despite never speaking to him, Megumi knows about Suguru. Well, he knows enough. He knows Suguru went to school with the two of you, and he knows something really, very bad (nearly) happened that caused the man to take a step back from the world you all live in. What exactly happened (or what didn’t happen), Megumi doesn’t know for sure. You and Satoru almost never speak about it, and when you do, it’s in hushed voices—and you always stop immediately when he enters the room.
But that’s okay. He doesn’t need to know. Suguru doesn’t force himself upon Megumi, and so he will extend him the same courtesy. “I thought Geto-san wasn’t a teacher, yet?” Tsumiki speaks up from beside him, tilting her head to the side in confusion. “Mimi and Nana said he’s still learning. How can he be teaching, already?”
“He’s not a teacher, yet, munchkin, well spotted,” Satoru answers with a proud grin. The nickname annoys Megumi—the feeling of irritation has been conditioned into his very being after Satoru chose it as the designated nickname for both of them. “An internship helps him build experience in the field. It means he is still learning, but he will do so while teaching.”
Tsumiki nods in understanding, her mouth opens and her lips curl into a small ‘ah’ as the information settles in. “So, you will pretend to be a teacher, then? At Megumi’s school?”
Satoru bites on his bottom lip, seemingly deep in thought. Seemingly—as Megumi is quite convinced he doesn’t ever think before he speaks. “I think so, yes,” he explains, and unknowingly retorates Megumi’s train of thoughts. How annoying. Satoru looks towards you for approval; it’s something he does very often. “It’s probably the safest route, no?”
“It’s our best option,” you say, and bring a thumb up to the corner of Satoru’s mouth. Gently, you wipe away a grain of rice stuck to his skin. It’s effortless, and nearly automated. Megumi wonders how many times you’ve had to do that. “Pretending to be a teacher shouldn’t be too difficult a task. Right, mochi?”
“Right,” Satoru echoes. His eyes track your every move, and the slight, pink colouring of his cheeks doesn’t seem to embarrass him even a little bit. Megumi thinks it should. Have some decorum. “I can do it, no problem.”
“Alright then,” you say, and smile. First at Satoru, and then at Megumi. You look at the boy for a few seconds; you’re about to ask him if he’s okay with it. He knows you are, because you always do. “Is that okay for you, Megumi?” It’s like clockwork, almost.
Megumi feels the need to answer with something snarky. Something akin to the sound of ‘What choice do I have?’ but he doesn’t—because you’re being kind, and you don’t deserve such a response. So, instead he turns towards Satoru.
“. . .Just don’t mess it up.”
Satoru delivers a whole spiel about how ‘he’d never do that’ and that he’s ‘more than capable’ of telling a little white lie, but Megumi dilutes it to background noise rather quickly. He continues sputtering his nonsense when Megumi and Tsumiki stand up to clear the table, and still hasn’t stopped even when you and him start loading the dishwasher together—Megumi chooses to seek reprieve in his room while he’s distracted.
It isn’t until many hours later, when Megumi leaves the sanctuary of his room to swipe a quick snack from the kitchen, that he first hears Satoru speak about something other than his great, and very much sufficient, ‘capabilities’. Your voices are muffled, and Megumi has to focus to make out your words. His soft, inaudible padding down the illuminated hallways comes to a halt. As if that would make his ears function better.
“Are you sure you want to do this, Satoru?”
The boy frowns. With such gentleness in your voice, it’s hard to identify the worry lingering beneath the surface. Megumi moves a bit closer. He stops one step shy of bumping into the wooden surface, and peeks through the groove. The door is ajar—it’s something that allows him to watch how your eyes follow Satoru’s large frame as he paces around the room. It’s strange. Seeing him so. . .frazzled.
Satoru nods. “I can do this, I know I can,” he says, and quits his pacing to look at you. Megumi can’t see his face, but he can see yours. He might as well not have, though, as he can’t make out the emotion that fills your eyes. It’s not one he himself has in his repertoire, that he knows for sure. “He never asks me for anything, princess. I have to do this right.”
Ah, this isn’t a conversation Megumi is meant to hear. He should probably seize his eavesdropping, he thinks, and winces a little when he properly analyses Satoru’s words. They’re truthful. Megumi doesn’t go to him when he needs something. His first thought is to go to you—and his second, Tsumiki. And if he’s being honest anyway, his third thought very likely isn’t Satoru, either; He’d try to solve it on his own if it came down to it. Megumi frowns again. He doesn’t like how that realisation makes him feel.
A careful shuffle of footsteps breaks him free from his thoughts. Megumi looks up, and catches how you place a hand on Satoru’s cheek. “I’m sure you’ll do great, baby,” you mumble. There’s a small, soft smile on your lips, one that quickly makes way for the peck Satoru places upon them.
“Thank you,” Satoru whispers. One of his hands reaches for yours, and Megumi suddenly feels as if he’s intruding on something when the man brings them up to his lips to press a tender kiss to them. Okay, no, definitely intruding—ew.
The boy scrunches his nose up in disgust, and hurriedly darts back towards his room. Suddenly, he has lost his appetite for a late-evening snack. Megumi lets out a deep sigh once he’s all tucked into his sheets again. Perhaps giving Satoru a shot wouldn’t be that big of a problem. Just one, though.
. . .Yeah, just one should be enough.
It’s the final, conclusive thought Megumi has before dozing off to sleep. Blissfully unaware of the conversation you and Satoru share—now behind a very closed door.
You stifle a giggle. The disappearance of Megumi’s presence outside your bedroom was quick and rampant as soon as Satoru started to kiss your hands. Something the sorcerer did very deliberately. It’s as if the boy suddenly forgot about the very special, very effective pair of eyes his guardian possesses. And with a cursed energy output such as Megumi’s, it would be hard not to recognise his presence.
“You did that on purpose,” you comment. “How cruel of you, mochi.”
Satoru hums, and kisses the inside of your wrist. “Maybe, the little brat shouldn’t eavesdrop, then,” he defends himself. There isn’t an inkling of guilt to be seen on his pretty face.
. . .Though, both of you still take some extra care to shut the door next time.
Megumi faithfully believes that, as of today, he has used-up all of his luck for the next five, no, ten years. It can only go downhill from here. For some inexplicable, mind-boggling reason—Satoru is actually pulling this off. That’s not all; he’s not merely winging it, he’s genuinely doing well. The boy can’t quite believe his eyes.
When he’d walked to the front with such an overexaggerated pep in his step, and an overabundance of bravado rolling off of him in waves—Megumi couldn’t help but watch on with a grim look, and a healthy dose of negative thoughts. It only amplified the nerves he’d collected so far during the walk to school. Somehow, watching Satoru give your flashcards a frantic do-over did very little to ease his bubbling anxiety.
There were many of them, flashcards that is. All possible questions his peers or his teacher could ever think of are written on those little pieces of cardboard. Courtesy of you, and your boyfriend. Megumi’s able to recall all those nights the two of you spend at the kitchen table—practising. He thought it was silly at the time.
But, as it turns out, it works.
Satoru is fun. To other people; Megumi doesn’t share the sentiment. Against all odds, he’s dynamic, and speaks with conviction. His flamboyant hand gestures have others think of them as amusing—captivating, even. Satoru is talking, and they’re all hanging onto his every word. No matter the fact that they’re all cleverly disguised lies.
Megumi can’t wrap his head around it. He doesn’t need to, however. If anything, he’s relieved that his peers think of his guardian as cool. While he certainly does not share the opinion, he isn’t too dense to admit that such a belief will save him a lot of embarrassment in the future. So, for this one, single day, he will let Satoru Gojo be cool. His snarky comments can resume tomorrow.
“Ah, it seems you have a deep love for your profession, Gojo-san,” his teacher says. She interrupts Satoru’s rant, and catches his attention as well as Megumi’s. Her voice is light and airy, and carries nothing that should cause him to fear the worst. Still, the boy feels on edge. “Though, I don’t remember the grade you are teaching. Could you tell us, again?”
Ah, and there it goes. The very first card in the elaborately built castle of lies.
Satoru pauses. A second passes, and then two, and three, and so on. He doesn’t speak for a good thirty, and Megumi can nearly see his mind leaf through his beloved flashcards—flashcards that are now neatly tucked into his pockets and entirely out of reach. That’s good. Because the absolute last thing Satoru should do now, is resort back to the flashcards.
Megumi shakes his head no as a signal.
“Ah,” Satoru says. “I teach kindergarten.”
Satoru didn’t catch the hint. Megumi wishes the ground would swallow him up. It would have been the correct answer—it is the answer that’s written on the flashcards—if Satoru hadn’t decided to go off route. Getting too caught up in the story he’d been free-writing, and allowing himself to get carried away by the looks of awe is resulting in his downfall, which, consecutively, will end with Megumi’s downfall, as well.
“Huh? But! What about the science experiment that exploded?” One of the children in his class whines. “I didn’t get to do that in kindergarten!”
“And the backflip you taught your students!”
“What about the first prize in the talent show? I thought your students were famous!”
The little bit of colour that normally resides in Satoru’s face steadily disappears, and he clenches his fist at his side. Ah, it’s great to know he’s at least aware of his mistake. That won’t help either of them at the moment, though. Megumi’s eyebrows furrow, and a feeling of distress overtakes him. It shows on his face. He doesn’t exactly go through the trouble of trying to hide it—there are bigger problems right now.
How utterly humiliating to be caught lying.
Satoru’s eyes find him. They’re just as troubled as his own. It worsens his anxiety.
“Oh, uhm, you see. . .” Satoru stammers, and Megumi’s stomach churns when the children around them continue to ask more and more questions. The wince his guardian lets out does little to soothe him. Megumi sighs, and looks at the ground. “Ah, I see. It seems you guys saw right through me.”
Megumi slides down in his seat. Maybe, if he tried hard enough, the ground would absorb him. It’s currently looking like a preferable fate.
“. . .I’m actually a detective.”
Oh, Jesus Christ.
“And. . .And for a detective, it’s very important to listen to what people say, because they could be lying!”
It’s a sad, pathetic excuse for a save. Megumi briefly ponders the distance between his seat and the door. Perhaps he could make a run for it. The subway station is very close by—getting on and travelling to an entirely new city to start a new life doesn’t seem like such a bad option. He sighs. No, that’s not possible. You and Tsumiki would be very worried. What else is there to do, though?
“You all picked up on my lie, which tells me every single one of you could make a great detective in the future.”
Megumi thinks Satoru might have some underlying mental problems. Though, they can’t possibly be as severe as the problems his classmates have—for they all believe the nonsense he’s giving them. Bright eyes, filled with hope and admiration, stare up at the man at the front of the class; impressed hums and entertained smiles get passed between the parents standing at the edge of the room. And Satoru, well, he seems entirely too proud of the fact that he made a bunch of children think they’re destined for a career in law enforcement. But, be that as it may, it works.
The children stir up unrest—the good kind this time, the kind that vocalises their excitement—and all rush to ask the detective a question. But, before they can even open their mouths, Satoru claps his hands together. It seems he has decided enough is enough, and it’s one of those very rare moments where Megumi agrees with him. The boy needs this to be over already.
“Alright, that’s it for today,” Satoru says, and feigns disappointment. He pretends to be affected by the sad groans of the children—keyword being pretend, as to the trained eye it’s quite clear that he wishes to leave. “I’m not allowed to tell you more.”
Ah, see, now that’s a good card.
“Wait, but, what about. . .”
“Ah, sorry, that’s confidential. Detective stuff, y’know?”
Confidential. Megumi thinks that might just be his new favourite word. The lingering feeling of anxiety slowly starts to subside with every step Satoru takes towards the back of the room—to the back, and away from the spotlight. His eyes follow the man’s large frame, but Satoru never chooses to look at him in return. His line of sight is firmly focused on the floor. It confuses Megumi, but he chalks it up to a mere whim.
All things considered (and minus the near cardiac arrest he went through), today went pretty well, after all. Much to his surprise.
Perhaps Megumi doesn’t hate Career Day. A strong dislike is more like it.
Megumi can’t count the times he wished for Satoru to be quiet. The exact number is much like the digits of Pi—huge, and absolutely never-ending. He can, however, count the times he didn’t wish for him to be quiet. As of today, that stands at a very solid one.
The birds around them chirp, and the bustle of other people is heard all around them—but they’re the only sounds gracing his ears. There is none of Satoru’s incessant chatter, nor is there even a glimmer of gloating about a job well-done. It’s eerily silent, and Megumi isn’t sure what to make of it. This isn’t quite how he imagined the walk home to go. Far from it, if he’s being honest.
“What’s up with you?”
It’s possibly the first time Megumi decides to break the silence, ever. The boy frowns, and fiddles with the straps of his backpack. There isn’t a middle-ground with Satoru, he has found out. Either he speaks entirely too much, or unnervingly little. There’s a tiny pebble in his path, and Megumi feels the need to kick it forward—so he does.
“I kind of messed up there, huh?”
The kick doesn’t have nearly enough force to it. Megumi watches as the little rock skips forward. Once, twice, and then it comes to a standstill again. “Yeah, kind of,” he agrees.
“I’m sorry,” Satoru rushes out. It’s said so fast, as if it physically pains him to say it. Perhaps it does. It’s sincere, however. There isn’t even a hint of a joke to be found. Something must be bothering him. “It didn’t go how I wanted it to go, and I don’t know why I went astray, and forgot about the cards. It—well, it was pretty stupid.”
Megumi doesn’t exactly feel the need to deny it.
“So, I get it, okay?” He continues, seeing the boy’s silence as an empty space for more conversation—more rambling. Since that’s what it is; rambles, plain and simple. Megumi doesn’t see the need for such a fuss. “I shouldn’t have strayed from the plan, and. . .”
“It’s fine.”
Satoru blinks at him. “What?”
“I said it’s fine,” Megumi repeats. Because it really is fine. Admittedly, it wasn’t smart of Satoru to all but discard your carefully planned presentation, but it ended well enough regardless. No harm, no foul. “Thank you for coming.”
That small, short sentence is enough to stop Satoru in his tracks. Megumi doesn’t, however. The man is very tall, he’s sure to catch up in a jiffy; he doesn’t need him to wait. There’s another small silence, though this one feels a lot more comfortable than the last. Satoru takes his time to process, and Megumi lets him.
“W—What?” The sorcerer stammers in shock. There is no need for Megumi to turn around and see—he can hear the smile curling onto his lips. “Did you just. . .”
“I won’t say it again,” Megumi grumbles definitively, and picks up his pace. The very tips of his ears heat up, and the apples of his cheeks turn red. The feeling of embarrassment. This wasn’t exactly how he’d envisioned it to appear when the day started.
Satoru attempts to run after him, to catch up. “Megumi!” He calls out, the very prominent, very familiar whiney lilt now back in his voice. Megumi didn’t miss it. “Wait for me, I didn’t hear you! Could you repeat that?”
“Yes, you did!” Megumi says, and throws him an annoyed glance from over his shoulder. He tightens his hold on the straps of his backpack. “Stop lying.”
“Nuh uh!”
“What are you? Six?”
Satoru’s toothy grin is infuriating. But—it’s familiar. And Megumi discovers he’s much more at ease when that grin is on display, than when the man in question is moping around. It’s a lot less alarming.
“And a half,” Satoru adds.
The scowl that’s on Megumi’s face appears almost instantly when he goes to ruffle his hair. For a man whose technique largely surrounds being untouchable, he has a surprising lack of awareness concerning this thing called personal space.
“Ugh,” Megumi groans, and pushes him off. It doesn’t work. Satoru gravitates towards him again—almost as if he’s a magnet. He doesn’t attempt to move a second time. In moments like these, it’s best to let Satoru get it all out of his system. “You’re so stupid.”
It’s true. He does think Satoru is stupid, but he can’t deny it—Satoru tried his very best today, and in the days prior. Which makes him one of the very small, barely existent group of people who have done so for him.
It seems one shot was enough, after all.
© MADE BY SANATOMIS — please, refrain from stealing, copying, or reposting any of my works.
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omg ily!!! congrats bb <3
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“stop looking at me like that” “like what?”
withhhhh ummmm shoto :3 (sorry i literally love him sm whehehjejejejjw)
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a/n: i was determined to finish this, lmk how the tension is!! i was trying to focus on that. anyways have this to makeup for not posting anything but yapping today
2k wc.
shoto has a staring problem.
a staring at you problem. that’s what you’ve come to believe over the past week.
he just couldn’t believe how perfect you looked. he could care less how your hair looks today, or whether you have any makeup on or not, shoto believed your very being was perfect. his eyes raked over your features, his gaze almost affectionate. he watches as you write something that present mic said, completely ignoring the very loud man, opting to watch you write down your notes instead. he somehow hasn’t noticed your eyes darting to the side to look at him, trying to figure out why shoto has been staring at you for a good five minutes.
his heterochromic eyes never leave your face as you attempt to listen to present mic’s lesson, which shouldn’t be that hard with how loud he is right? wrong. it’s actually kind of difficult to do when one of class 1A’s finest guys is staring at you in class.
you tilt your head slightly to face him, raising an eyebrow, which catches his attention. you watch as the tips of his ears redden, causing you to suppress a smile.
“you okay?” you whisper, looking around to see if present mic was paying attention to you two, he wasn’t. shoto’s eyes strike yours as they flick to make eye contact. at first, he just stares at you, his lips parted before he blinks once, twice. his eyes dart away from yours, back to his desk as his hand comes to rest on his neck and you can just barely hear him mutter a small “yeah.”
he only peeks at you a few more times during the rest of the class period, and the rest of the day in fact. you retire to the dorms as classes get out, the majority of class A piling into the living room for some quality time. you settle on one of the smaller couches, your back against the arm rest as everyone finds a spot. And when everyone’s settled, you realize the only other person on this couch was shoto.
and he starts staring again.
and you truly don’t mind him staring, it just becomes unnerving when it seems like you’re the only one he’s even trying to pay attention to, like he’s just naturally tuning everything out but you. his head is rested in his palm as his arm props himself up, his torso and face turned towards you, like a sunflower to the sun.
and due to your position on the couch, anytime you angle your head forward, you meet his strangely soft gaze, his eyes studying every minute (extremely small) detail on your face. you feel your cheeks heat up under his watch before you feel mina draping across the back of the couch, her face propped up in her arms as they balance on the back cushions.
“what’s with that face, todoroki?” she asks, a small smirk on her lips as she follows shoto’s gaze to you before he rips his eyes away from you to respond to the pink girl.
“what face?” todoroki sincerely asks, his eyebrows pinched in confusion as his head tilts in the same manner, causing mina and her smirk deflate. she sighs dramatically, her eyes rolling as she straightens herself upright. you catch her eyes and you can feel your cheeks heat again as she winks at you.
“oh nothinggg..” she drags out as she grins cheekily before toddling off towards kaminari and kirishima.
your eyes track her as she walks off before looking forward once more, and once again meeting shoto’s gaze. you feel shy under his gaze, it seems scrutinizing, but if you really look, he’s only studying you, memorizing the way you are.
“do you wanna go outside?” you blurt out, “i mean.. like.. on one of our balconies?” you clarify, your fingers picking at eachother as you wait for his response, and after what feels like forever he nods, a small smile gracing his face. you feel the couch dip as he gets up, offering you a hand. you place your hand in his, his hand warm to the touch as it closes around yours. you use shoto to pull yourself up before heading out of the living area.
the two of you manage to sneak away from the rest of the class before drawing too much attention to yourselves and as the two of you successfully get away, you turn to shoto.
“which dorm are we going to?” you ask, watching as he turns to look at you, his eyebrows furrowing in thought before they relax again, “we can go to mine.”
you nod as the two of you turn to the elevator, pressing the button for the fifth floor when it arrives. you lean against the back wall, your hands resting behind you on the handle bar. you can feel shoto’s gaze on you again, only this time he’s at least trying to be discreet, maybe mina’s comment threw him off.
you feel the elevator rumble as it arrives at the 5th floor, the bell dinging as the doors open, allowing you and shoto out. the two of you make it to his room in less than a minute, and when you arrive shoto opens the door, holding it open for you as well.
you slip between him and the wall into his room, admiring the traditional design of it all. sure, you saw it when all of class A did their room tours, but you could really admire it now. he watched as you examined his room, your eyes darting from one thing to another. he lets out a soft chuckle at your antics as he crosses the room to the balcony door, sliding it open as he looks back at you.
“are you coming?” he asks, and he could not seem more princely. the wind blows in through the cracked sliding door, hitting shoto’s hair just right, the little quirk of his lips not helping anything. mina’s comment was just putting thoughts in your head, right?
“y/n?” shoto’s eyebrow raised at your lack of response, which left you flustered. you nod as you hurry your feet over to the door. shoto’s eyebrows relax once again as you hurry over to him, holding open the sliding door for you as if it would shut if he wasn’t.
you graciously step through the doorway, instantly sighing as you feel the humid air, the lower temperatures of the evening allowing you to actually enjoy the summer heat. you hear shoto step outside as well, shutting the sliding door behind him. you cast a brief glance over your shoulder before moving to lean against the railing.
“you probably shouldn’t do that.” he says as he approaches the railing to the left of you, causing you to turn your head.
“how come?” you ask, an eyebrow raising as you show no hint of moving.
“if it breaks you could fall.” he says, his own arms moving to rest against the very same railing. you scoff at his action, causing his lips to quirk up again.
“as if you wouldn’t save me,” you quip and you actually pull a soft chuckle out of the boy beside you, causing your own smile to form.
shoto’s eyes practically light up at the sight of your smile, his cheeks warming as he props his arms against the railing properly, so that he’s able to admire you like he wants to. your smile softens as you meet his gaze, however you still hide half your face behind your hunched shoulder. but shoto doesn’t mind, he could stare at just your hand for hours, admiring each freckle or mole, each vein and hangnail.
and the look on his face and in his eyes is the same as earlier, an adoring, earnest, affectionate look, and you couldn’t fathom it.
“stop looking at me like that,” you sigh, your hands resuming their skin-picking activities. You could practically hear shoto’s confusion, you glance at him and see his eyebrows furrowed in your direction, and you almost wish you hadn’t looked.
“like what?” he asks, and you almost laugh, as if he doesn’t realize how he stares at you, like you hung the sun, the moon, and the stars, like you were his only joy, like you were his sun.
you settle for a scoff as your hand rubs at your eye. your eyebrows furrow as you try and figure out a way to explain to this clueless boy how flustered he makes you feel with a look. you sigh as you straighten yourself up, if only slightly.
“you look at me like you know me, like you’ve seen into my very being and accept all of it, like i could do no wrong, like.. like you're in love with me or something..” you spout, your cheeks heating up as you explain, though you have nothing to embarrassed of.
“oh.” is all shoto says, his voice monotone as it usually is, but it seemed almost tainted by dejection. the change in voice causes you to look over at him, you head turning as you see him staring at the ground, his cheeks practically on fire.
“you want me to stop? so.. i made you uncomfortable, im sorry.” shoto says, and his voice sounds almost pained and you can see his hands tightening into fists as they rest against the railing.
“i didn’t mean it like that!” you exclaim, your hand grabbing the railing dangerously close to his tightening fists. “truly, it honestly just confuses me..” you say as you relax once more, seeing shoto’s fists relax.
“please tell me,” shoto says, and his tone almost sounded like a beg. your cheeks heat up as he parts from the railing, causing you to turn and when you do you realize how close he is, only he’s now facing you straight on, and you can’t hide from his gaze. “i want to understand you.”
you sigh, your eyes darting to your side before you look back to him, avoiding looking into his eyes as you speak.
“you may not know this, but you’re one of the best looking guys in our class, and honestly all of UA, and it just threw me off. the way you looked at me, like i was special, just.. baffled me.” you say. your eyes finally meet his again, and you can see confusion swirling in them, his eyebrows creased in the same manner. your foot digs into the hard concrete of the balcony and your hand scrubs at your face, embarrassed by your sudden confession and shoto’s prolonged silence.
“ugh, nevermind, forget i said anything,” you rush out as you try to side step the two-toned boy, only getting a few paces past him before his voice stops you.
“but..” you turn to look at him, and he turns to face you, his eyebrows still furrowed in confusion. “you are special.”
your lips part but no sound comes out as you stare into his eyes, your own brows pinched with emotion. the way he said it so surely, as if it was utterly absurd to even entertain the thought of you not being special.
“really?” you ask, and you wince as you hear yourself, but you couldn’t have stopped yourself from asking. it was reactive, your subconscious craving your deserved praise.
shoto nods, his lips quirking into a soft smile. And you return his smile, your eyes are a little watery, but the lowlight coming from shoto’s dorm helps you disguise that.
“do you.. want a hug?” he offers, unsure if it’s what you need in the moment but you jump at the opportunity. you wrap your arms around his waist, giggling as his arms hesitant before wrapping around your shoulders.
“is this okay..?” he murmurs into your hair and you fight back a grin as you nod, “yeah, it’s perfect.”
the two of you untangle your arms from eachother, but as you do you hear mina’s distinctive gasp. turning you see her on sero’s balcony, staring wide eyed at the two of you.
“i called it! sero! come out here!” mina yells before sero shushes her, causing her to whine as she gets dragged back into his dorm and sending an apologetic look to the two of you.
once he closes the door once again, you turn back to shoto, and as he mirrors your action the two of you burst into a small fit of giggles.
maybe his staring wasn’t so bad.
ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ: @satelitis @kozumesphone
#ᴛʜɪꜱ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ᴏɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ɪꜱʟᴀɴᴅ..!#🐬 “ᴘᴜʟʟ ʜɪᴍ ꜰᴏʀ ᴀ ᴄʜᴀᴛ!”#𐀔 // elle writes !#bnha#bnha x reader#bnha x you#bnha x y/n#mha#mha x reader#mha x you#mha x y/n#bnha fluff#mha fluff#my hero academia#my hero academia x reader#boku no hero academia#boku no hero academia x reader#shoto todoroki#shouto todoroki#shoto todoroki x reader#shouto todoroki x reader#shoto todoroki x you#shouto todoroki x you#shoto todoroki x y/n#shouto todoroki x y/n#todoroki x reader#todoroki#todoroki x you#todoroki x y/n
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TW: NSFW, fem bodied reader, use of f*ck, smut, exes to lovers, hurt/comfort, make up s*x, unhealthy dinamics (don't blame me Fyodor is a warning himself), possesive behaviour (if anyone treats you like that please run away) Fyodor might be ooc and whipped for the reader, teasing, both parts acting immature (communication is the key people), no use of y/n, breeding kink, After reading ep 117 please don't hate my pookiebear 😞
Word count: 6.6k (I don't know what came over me so enjoy)
Click here for part 1
✧₊⁺.𖥔 ݁ ˖. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁.𖥔 ݁ ˖₊⁺✧
Yeah, I want it all (from you)
Bye, bye, baby
Bye, bye, bye~
⁀➴
.𖥔 ݁ ˖
Don't you know who you're dealing with?
Um, do you think you'll buy me lots of diamonds?
(Yes, of course I will my darling)
⋆⭒˚。⋆⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Blurring the lines between real and the fake
Dark and lonely, I need somebody to hold me
He will do very well
I can tell, I can tell
Keep me safe in his belltower hotel
He's loving my look
And I'm loving all his strategic ways
I said "do you think you'll kill for me one day?"
(Yes, of course I will, my darling)
:・゚✧:・.☽˚。・゚✧:・.:⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆♱⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺:・゚✧:・.☽˚。・゚✧:・.:
Life was not easy—at least for you. Actually, the last few weeks have been a living hell. Well, the issue was your ex-husband. Fyodor. You tried everything you could to ignore him, but failed miserably. But why was he so stubborn and casual to the extent that it got on your nerves? Why, out of nowhere, was he talking to you about the weather and then suddenly asking you why you had eye bags? Or were you sleeping enough and well? Sometimes hiding your frustration was difficult. You nearly thought that he was doing all of it on purpose. That sneaky bastard. So, your day looked like this: go outside and accidentally run into your ex-husband, try to avoid him at all costs, hide, and fail miserably.
After that, go home and spend the entire day and night thinking about how to avoid seeing his face again. But he was appearing out of nowhere at the times when you least expected him. All of this was difficult because he was exceptionally smart and always a step ahead. And a little bit hot. He couldn't see your thoughts, right? If so, you would be in trouble. Because the last time he drove you into a corner, his body was so close to yours that you could hear nothing but your own heartbeat.
Also, the 'worst' part was how he touched you so softly, just like how you liked it. Like after your exhausting day at work, when the only thing you craved was nothing but his touch, and how you two only breathed in each other's presence while clinging to one another. But whatever it was, only remained in the past now. But the most absurd part was you getting nervous and not even making eye contact with him. Damn, why was it so hard? He shouldn't have any meaning to you or a place in your heart anymore. Look at him, already healed and living his life as if mocking you. So why did you feel so stuck and frustrated?
So you gave him indifferent answers like "Oh, I'm fine" or "Yeah, the weather is quite nice today. Isn't it, Mr. Dostoevsky?" Oh, so you knew how to push his buttons, didn't you? You naive doll. Reminding him of something that he didn't want to remember or even acknowledge was on his mind like a disease: the fact that you two were indeed divorced. That you weren't his—at least on paper. Well, what else could he expect? By staying by his side like the cute, clever thing you are, you've eventually learned a few tricks too, but who knew that you would be using them against him? But then he smiled....Oh, that smile that you adored...But why it felt rather cold?
So there you were trying to build up a wall between yourself and him, and there he was angry and in fight with his heart. And now the formality? Yes, it was laughable indeed. Of course, it was reasonable that you would not act...as you did before the divorce. It was normal, right? So he took a step back from you, smiled again, and said goodbye as if you were an old friend of his and like he was going to see you again.
And there you were, standing dumbfounded and trying to process everything while he was walking away from you like it was a normal encounter. Well, who knew what was going through his mind? Maybe he was up to some mischief? You didn't bother to think about it since your heart was beating abnormally fast.
But for now, seeing him wasn't the main problem because you had a wedding to attend—your friend's wedding. To be honest, you weren't the most excited person about this event. Maybe you've become numb to your feelings, or 'he' was just appearing from the darkest parts of your mind. Was it always like this? Even when he wasn't by your side, he was the only thing you could think about.
He didn't play some dirty tricks on you, did he? So, just to clear your mind, you put on your dress, apply your makeup, and get into the taxi in case it starts to rain on your way. It was a cloudy day. What lovely weather for a wedding, isn't it? The wedding was held in a luxurious place in the city. Affording a place that expensive must have been hard on them since they weren't that rich in the first place, which is none of your business, but going to places like that felt a little weird 'cause it only reminded you about those days you've wished to forget. After getting out of the taxi, gray clouds greeted you.
It was becoming clear that not bringing an umbrella with you was a bad idea. You began walking inside the building to take the elevator. A sigh left your lips. It felt like it was going to be a long night. It has been a long time since you went into a crowd like this. But it was refreshing to talk to old friends and have chats with people. It made you forget your worries and feel a little freer. The place was pleasant, just like how you liked it. You got some champagne and began slowly sipping. You promised yourself that you weren't going to drink more than one glass, so you were going to cherish this one glass of champagne well.
Your head hurt a little because of all the chatter and music. The lights weren't helping either. So you decided to get away from the crowd a little bit. Taking your only friend—a glass of champagne—with you to the nearest window close to the terrace, you looked outside briefly. Well, it was raining cats and dogs outside. Another sigh left your lips. The sound of raindrops falling down the window and the accompanying sound of thunder were putting your mind at ease, even just a little bit. At least it was distracting you from your thoughts. So you take another sip and try to come up with things that were nice about this place.
The place was to your liking, your friend was happy, you got your drink with you, and many people were there—many, many people, actually. It was crowded. Maybe if you stayed long enough, you got to eat a slice of cake. Many people you didn't even know greeted you, gave you compliments and kissed your hand as a compliment—a gesture to show their interest in you. Yes.....it was a wonderful wedding indeed. Your battery was low, so eating cake might make you feel a little better.
So you decided to take a slice for yourself. But as you passed through all these people with your remaining energy, one of them caught your attention. His back was turned to you, but you could tell who he was in an instant. He was a little far away from you, in a distant corner of the place. At first, you decided your brain was playing games with you, or maybe you were drunk, but your glass was only half empty. So you instantly took a turn on your heels and hurried in the opposite direction. Why in all of those people he was here? He wore a black suit, but he didn't have his jacket on.
He was holding it on his arm while his hands were in his pockets and talking to some businessmen that you were sure had enough money to buy an island on a random day because the city was too noisy for their liking. Also, the important thing here was that 'he' didn't even know the groom and wasn't that close to your friend to be invited to her wedding. Your heart was pounding in your chest, and your palms were sweaty. Your only choice was getting out of here without him noticing you. Luckily, the bride was close to you, so you could just say goodbye to her and make up a story to leave early.
You exchange greetings with the bride and groom and try to keep the conversation as short as possible. The groom asks you if you like the place or not. So absentmindedly, you say yes, and the words coming out of his mouth make you lose your composure completely.
"Man, Dostoevsky surely has good taste. If it weren't for him, we wouldn't be able-"
The bride squeezes his arm and tells him to shut up. "W-what?" Is the only thing that comes out of your mouth after hearing his words.
But your friend just laughs nervously and tries to change the topic and starts to ask you questions about whether the cake is to your liking or not and other things that you can't comprehend at the moment. So you just murmur a short "goodbye" to both and start to walk away as if you didn't hear 'his' name coming out of the groom's mouth just a second ago. Your steps become faster as the seconds pass. With a still half-empty champagne glass you still hold in your hand that you forgot to put away, the only thing that could be heard was the sound of your high heels in the corridor that led to the elevator.
Seeing him at the wedding completely caught you off guard. What was he doing in a place like that? Also, when did he become that close to the groom to the extent that he helped him to afford a place this expensive? He wasn't the type to help someone he'd just met.
Oh......That sly man..... he knew you would come to this place so he could tease you until the end. Yes, that must be it, or you were just overreacting and he didn't care about you. Well, thinking about the latter made your heart swell. While thinking about these things, your fingertip met the buttons on the corridor for the elevator.
After pressing it, your fingers brushed against the skin on your neck and began to scratch it. It was an old habit of yours that you hated because it would give away the fact that you were anxious. Most of the time, you would make your skin bleed and hurt for weeks. To avoid this, you pressed the button again, as if pressing it repeatedly would make the elevator move faster. The sounds of the raindrops, the faint noises of the people, and the music could still be heard from the place that you were standing. That stupid glass of champagne was still in your hand.
The feeling to facepalm yourself was quite strong, but the sound of the elevator's door opening prevented that from happening. You entered quickly, pressed the button, and waited for the door to close inch by inch. The relief of being able to go home was spreading through your whole body. But— when the sliding door of the elevator was just about to close completely, a hand stopped that from happening. You held your breath because last-minute interruptions never signaled anything good for you—it was what you believed at least. The sliding door of the elevator revealed the person you wanted to see the last—it was none other than Fyodor.
He was there standing, one hand in his pocket, the other hand pushing the door of the elevator further to reveal your shocked figure. When your eyes met, your heart stopped, your breath hitched, and he was just standing, looking at you like he was devouring you, devouring your presence. None of you talked for a few seconds, and the only thing heard was a distant thunder in the background. Then he opened his mouth:
"Good evening, my dear. Running off when it is raining this much and with a drink in your hand is such a pleasant sight to see."
Yes, you could die from embarrassment right this moment. Not just you failed to run away but also looked stupid.
"Mr. Dostoevsky, good evening to you too. But I'm in a hurry, so—"
He raised one of his eyebrows and tilted his head slightly in amusement.
"Well, surely I can see that you are in a hurry. But dear, I don't quite understand the reason why."
Oh, how he liked to ask questions that he knew its answers to. He knew exactly why, but teasing you was much fun for him. Again, you weren't making eye contact with him and now playing with the hem of your dress to distract yourself from the fact that you were again, fell right into his plan. So you just turn your head to the side to avoid his question and give him the impression that he never asked you anything in the first place. Now his patience was running quite low. He spoiled you a lot didn't he? There is awkward silence that you can't stand, so you try to look at him from the corner of your eye without him noticing.
But when you do so, he is already staring at you with his deep purple eyes. His hand finds your chin in a quick but gentle touch and turns your head, so now your eyes are directly looking into his.
"My, my, you are not thinking of leaving when it is raining this much and it is also a shame that roads are closed too."
He steps into the elevator and casually presses a button inside. So now you are alone with him in the elevator and incredibly close to each other. Your plan failed with the doors of the elevator closing behind him.
"W-what are you doing?"
A chuckle leaves his lips as if you said something funny. His hand moves away from your chin as he steps aside; his warmth is now gone.
"Well, you are not planning to stay outside in this weather? Am I correct? There are rooms available for guests to stay the night. Aren't they very thoughtful? So I'm taking you to one, to rest for the night."
Oh, you weren't a step behind but several. But you were so sick, sick of all of this. His teasing and plans were too much for you to handle at this moment. Letting your emotions take the lead wasn't a wise decision; you were trying so hard not to. Elevator's door open and he steps outside and waits for you to come to his side, but you don't and stand on your heels. He was not going to let you get soaked and sick in this weather, or do something careless given your emotional state, so he takes your hand into his, even though he is only wrapping his hand around yours, and takes you to the so-called 'guest's room'. No words come through your mouth while your mind is screaming. You start to scratch your neck again. You want to hurt him, scream at him, and make him understand your feelings when he looks this comfortable. Your eyes start to fill with tears from frustration.
When he lets go of your hand and opens the door for you with a card that he's taken out of his pocket.
"My dearest, I wish you goodnight."
He takes that stupid champagne from you, and the things he makes leave you confused. He wraps his hand around your wrist that is scratching your skin and removes your gloves in a calm manner and puts them inside his pocket. Now, without your gloves that completed your outfit, you feel a little cold and a little bit vulnerable. He leans in slightly, taking your hand to his lips and kissing it before lifting his head and meeting your gaze. When your teary eyes meet his possessive ones, a chill runs down your spine. He squeezes your hand lightly.
Shit, even like that, he wants to ruin you. but fuck your eyes sparkling with tears just because of him makes him want to eat you whole so that nobody but only him could see you. That bastards who don't know their places putting their hands on yours so carelessly boils him with rage. They all should know that you only belong to him. So he continues to plant kisses on your hand, and now to your wrist. He sucks into your skin and licks it after to ease its pain so deliciously that it leaves you confused.
You don't understand why he is doing all of this. His soulless eyes, filled with darkness, only stare into yours as you free your hand from his. He turns and walks away, leaving you on the edge of the door. He is going to throw away those gloves that those filthy sinners' lips touched. He is beyond annoyed; no, he is going to burn those gloves first, then those foolish men later. Perhaps after that he will be satisfied. Your heart and mind were racing and your lips open to say the words that was going to make Fyodor stop in his tracks.
"Fyodor, I hope that my absence eats you whole."
He stops from thinking what to do to these men to comprehend your words. You wanted to hurt him, hurt his pride, and show him his own vulnerability. Well, actually, you did that. He wasn't planning to turn in his tracks according to his plan. But fuck, somehow when you were involved in his plans, they always seemed to crumble. A sound to show his dissatisfaction left his lips. He was just going to plant the seeds in your head to get you to come back. Then his plan would proceed. You're really something else.
He drank the remaining champagne in his hand in one sip, and his eyes staring to one point left to meet your back that was now turned to him. You were going inside the room in slow motion. His quick steps towards you and your quiet sobs were the only thing that could be heard beside the rain outside. With force now you were now inside the room and the door was closed shut behind you, but the shocking part was a sound of thud next to the console table and couple arms embracing you. His hand was encircling your waist and pressing your body into his further, not letting you go from his grasp.
His one hand now going upwards while caressing where he could reach, he held your chin and lifted it to meet your face now that was wet with tears. Why he always had to look like a madman when you were around?
"You have no idea what you do to me, don't you?"
His tone was cold, so was his eyes. Now you looking up to him with your doe eyes and the hitching of your breath with your sobs was a sight to see. There was no way he could let another man see you like this. How could he? He would break any hand that could reach to you and make them drown in their own blood.
"My love..."
He tucked your hair behind your ear, exposing your neck to him. He lowered his head to your neck, breathed in your scent gently and pressed a kiss to your pulse.
"My heart..."
You could hear your heartbeat. He moved slowly towards your ear.
"Don't worry your pretty head over everything. I will get all of it figured out for you."
Like he wasn't the main cause of all of this. Was he asking for forgiveness now? A loud sob escaped your lips.
" 'm tired" of you
His hair touching the side of your face and his voice near your ear made you feel weak in your legs.
"I know"
He let go of your chin and held your wrist, guiding your arm as you turned your face to him. Now that your face was turned to him, he could take a look at you properly. He missed your warmth, your gentle demeanor, and you. His hand moved from your wrist to your hand, guiding it to his lips before kissing the palm of your hand. His other hand found your waist and pressed your lower body against his again. Your free hand gripped the front of his suit. Your sobs are now louder. He was waiting, waiting for a hint for your forgiveness and acceptance. He wasn't going to force himself onto you; he wasn't a sinful man like that.
"If you allow me, my love, I will make it all work between us."
You were shocked and speechless. Was he really asking you to accept him back into your life? It was still raining outside; the room was nothing but ordinary—a king-sized bed with breathtaking scenery outside.
"Don't you see, sweetheart? All of it was just for you today. Put your trust in me once more, as you always do, and don't think anything else."
You knew better than anyone else that whenever he talked and promised something to you he would always kept them because well, you are his little sweetheart. Aren't you?
"You are still in my heart and always on my mind. You are no good for me. I know that too, but why I can't just let all of it go—"
With a swift motion, Fyodor leads you inside and toward the wall by releasing his grip on your wrist and putting his other hand behind your back to quickly wrap around your waist. He pressed your back completely to the wall while pressing his whole body into yours. And he kissed you feverishly, rough with a sense of claiming. Your head was spinning. He kissed, sucked, and bit your lower lip. It felt so good that you were falling apart under his touch. So you held him like your life depended on him, you held his neck, deepened the kiss, and leaned to him more with desperation.
You were running out of breath but couldn't stop kissing him. You returned his kiss with the same desire. You could feel heat building up in your stomach. A moan vibrated through your throat. His palm found the back of your thigh, grasped it, and lifted it to press further into you as he slowly rubbed his groin into yours. A groan escaped his lips. His hand rose higher and higher until it reached the hem of your dress and up to the curve of your ass and caressed, squeezed it with force. When you two pull away from each other, there was a string of saliva connecting you two. His body felt warm against yours.
He was going to make up to you in every way possible. He was going to worship your body tonight, just as he did every day when he got down on his knees to pray to God. You looked stunning like that, his angel, your hair a little tangled, your eyes hazy and filled with desire. Your lips briefly connected again, and he encouraged you to part them so that his tongue could enter and explore your mouth. Not feeling his skin under your touch was unbearable, so you started to loosen his tie and pull him more while your other hand tried to unbutton his vest and shirt. He smirked against your lips before parting for a second.
"Eager, are we?"
You blushed and glanced away from him just to meet his eyes a second later while slightly nodding.
"Mmph"
Fyodor cursed quietly in his native language. You were just so his and obedient it made his dick twitch in his pants. He pecked your lips again and began sucking on the skin of your neck, opening the zip in the back of your dress and causing it to fall to the floor. You wrapped your hand around his neck and massaged his head while breathing deeply. Quiet moans escaped your lips and it only made the bulge in his pants bigger.
His lips on your neck leaving marks, an evident sign that you were his, and licking just to bite after to make you whimper was delightful to his ears. Fyodor began to lead you to bed, holding you impossibly close to his body. The back of your leg hit the edge of the bed, and he laid you gently on it, his eyes dark with a glint of lust, he was nearly fully clothed, he looked at you with pure hunger while you were only in your underwear and bra.
"Myshka, you only wore that dress just to drive me mad with temptation, didn't you? Oh darling, even when you are not aware of it, your mind desires to please me."
That dress was his anniversary present to you; you never got to wear it, though, due to circumstances you don't want to remember right now. Maybe you picked that dress unknowingly or maybe on purpose. Who knows? He began unbuttoning the remaining buttons while looking down at you. Your panties were getting wetter by the second under his gaze.
"So now tell me."
He slowly took off his vent and tossed it aside while maintaining eye contact.
"Did any man lay their hands on you while you weren't by my side?"
He was teasing you; you knew it, and he knew it well too. You couldn't just let any man touch you, no.
"Took of your bra."
So your hands moved to your back to remove your bra. He was staring at you intensely, his hands on the sides of your thighs, stroking them gently. When you took it off, he let out a pleasant hum. When your hands reached the ends of your panties, he stopped you with his voice.
"Keep them on, darling."
Fyodor began to unbutton his shirt and tossed it aside. His pale, lean, yet muscular skin was visible. The bulge in his pants is evident to your eyes. He leaned in while putting his body between your legs, parting them further.
"My eyes are up here pretty."
He loved teasing you and making you a blushing mess.
"Now tell me, did they touch you here?"
He kissed your clavicle tenderly and bit just to get a reaction out of you. A gasp escaped you.
"N-no" He licked it and continued to leave kisses alongside your breast, just to stop and look into your needy eyes once again. He leaned in and bit your earlobe before whispering into your ear.
"How about here?"
His hand cupped your breast and gave it a light squeeze. A sigh escaped you.
"N-never"
A hum vibrated through your ear.
"Yeah, just like that, keep being my good girl."
He leaned to take your nipple inside his mouth and giving it a light suck, his hot tongue was sucking the bud while playing with your other nipple, rolling it between his fingers to not neglect it.
He left marks there too. Your moans grew louder; your hand grabbed and tugged his dark hair, earning a growl from him. He continued kissing your skin down to your belly, your back arching into his touch. Your underwear was damp with your wetness, and your pussy was aching with the desire to be filled. Fyodor kept you steady with his hands to stop you from closing your legs against his body.
"Myshka, behave" It was impossible since it had been so long since you felt this way.
"'M sorry."
He lowered himself to lick a long strand of your clothed heatness. Your breathing quickened, and your hand closed your mouth to muffle your moans.
Fyodor looked up to you and sucked the fabric and started to push his tongue against your clit earning more whines from you. God, you were beautiful and all his to ruin. He could feel your hole twitching and your panty getting soaked with your juices.
His hand found the hem of your panties and waited for you to look at him.
"Then what about here, darling?"
You were desperate and craving for him; your answer didn't disappoint him.
"N-no Fyodor, never!"
His name spilling out of your mouth so deliciously made his member twitch in anticipation. So before he took it off, he prevented you from closing your mouth by taking one of your hands into his.
Then he took it off in one smooth movement, your juices glistening, your hole twitching with want, he hummed and buried himself between your legs, licking and kissing your pussy with fever. His nose bumping against your clit made you moan loudly. His face between your heat, his tongue working skillfully to tease your nerve endings, his lips kissing and slurping your arousal with sinful noises were starting to get you to the edge. Your free hand gripped his hair to make him go faster.
"A-ahh"
His other hand, keeping you down, opened your thighs even more. Your sounds only made his pants tighter. Fyodor started to move faster; your taste only made him hungrier; his hand on your thigh now started to caress your walls to find the spot that made you see stars. He began stretching you by adding a second finger, while his tongue lapped at your wet folds. He stretched you with his fingers, and he couldn't help but let a moan escape. All sensations were becoming overwhelming, and Fyodor felt your walls clench around his fingers.
"M-mh n-nnagh F-Fyo I-I'm-"
He knew you were close, so he found the spot that made you weak, bent, and rubbed his fingers to stimulate it continuously. You pulled his hair harder and desperately tried to move your hips against his face with need. You heard him groan; he added another finger, and you were beyond gone, cumming andcrushing down while moaning loudly. Your body squirmed as he helped you ride out your orgasm. You felt dizzy and gasped for air as your juices dripped down his chin. The sight was filthy and hot at the same time. He gathered your juices in his fingers, sucked on them with lust, and looked deeply into your eyes. The sight caused you to moan again.
"You taste divine, my dear."
Then he started kissing you with the same lust, tasting yourself on his tongue made you squirm again. Your hands caressed his back and you kissed him back. He lowered his groin and pressed it into your wet pussy, making you whimper into his mouth while grinding his rock hard member against you. He placed his hands on your hips to make you grind against him harder, earning a muffled moan from you. The heat pooling in your stomach once again, making the front of his pants wet with your juices, you hear him moan into your lips. Fyodor moves away from you, his belt clinking. He looks at you like he's about to devour you whole.
So you accept him once again. He takes his pants off alongside his boxers, revealing his cock, his tip dripping with precum. First, he makes you comfortable on the bed and puts your legs to his sides, revealing your pussy to him more, his behavior turning you on more and more. Your sight sends shivers down his spine, and he has to restrain himself from taking you right here and there. Your sweaty form, lustful eyes, and eagerness are only fueling the fire. He pulls you closer to him, making your legs wrap around his waist. He strokes himself a few times before looking back at you. Your walls are clenching around nothing and feeling empty.
He uses his tip to gather around your fluids to lubricate his dick then slowly circling your entrance with it while pulling cute noises from you.
"F-fyodor, please don't tease me anymore."
He chuckles coldly.
"What happened to Oh, Mr. Dostoevsky, hmm?"
He slowly pushes himself. A gasp leaves you, your walls sucking him in for more, leaving Fyodor nearly breathless, he growls.
"Mmph- Aah-ah—that—you know why."
He's halfway through, and your warmth is already intoxicating.
"Well do I?"
He was not foolish or sinful like those around him. He had a greater purpose. But now he was kneeling and worshipping your body. Maybe loving someone only led to sin in the best ways possible. You couldn't let him go; you know it is toxic. But damnit, he lets it happen. He spoiled you too much, didn't he? Now he can't predict anything—any emotions, to be precise. These are his feelings, but he is unable to understand or rationalize them. It irritates him if he can't control it or twist it to his liking. Oh, God, help his pure soul. He pushes himself all the way in one go, taking you by surprise with a whimper. Leaning down into you, he pushes you down into missionary, his elbows on the sides of your head, slowly pulling his cock in and out of you as your moans got louder.
He is in no better shape, but he was trying not to show it while gasping for air. Your gummy walls squeezing him tight and already milking him, your whines close to his ear making it hard for him to keep his composure. He starts moving faster, hitting your G spot along the way. Your hands on his back, scratching his pale skin, and your legs pulling him closer only feeding his possession more. He gazes into your eyes, thrusting faster and rougher. Your eyes were cloudy just like the weather and now they were tearing up, but this time with pleasure. You look back at him, your resentful eyes only turning him on more.
Oh, how he loves those eyes of yours. Picking up the pace, he leans in and puts more weight on you. While panting for more air, he thrusts one more time and places his lips near your chin and whispers:
"Myshka isn't my side of the bed cold? Don't you want me to come back to you?"
Your legs tightening and trembling around him, you couldn't see his face but only could hear the squelching sounds from where you two were connected and your moans with the sound of rain. A white ring was forming in the base of his cock while you were meeting his thrust feverently. As he sinks deeper into you, you could feel your climax approaching. Your mind clouded with pleasure, you answer him.
"Fuck Fedya, yes!"
Yes, yes, yes, call him like that again and fuck yes, he will destroy the world if you want. Yes, he will buy you a house fuck even with the one with a lake. Then again, he will fuck you as much as you want him to. Who exactly is he fooling? He is yours eternally, just as you are his for a lifetime. God must have been playing games with his mind. Oh, your eyes and how they look under the moonlight. Oh, how he likes it even more when they get all shimmery with tears all because of him. Since he is the only one who can bring heaven to you with such pleasure. All his, all fucking his.
That nickname, his name, coming out of your mouth only makes his dick harder and balls tighter. Chasing his own high with you, he speeds up and places his thumb on your clit, playing with it to push you over the edge. Thick tears making their way down to your face to his hair. He raises his head and with his thick Russian accent, he curses between his teeth once again.
"I gave you what you have wanted, didn't I, darling? So why are you crying right now? How petty."
Such simple and heartbreaking words coming out of his mouth as if he isn't the one who is actually acting petty. How laughable isn't it? But he can't let you see him this vulnerable. The knot in your lower belly threatening to snap anytime makes you desperate for your own release.
"You gotta use your words, pretty."
"I-I'm- aghhh- I'm coming."
Your toes curling, juices drenching the sheets, holding him close with your legs, your climax washes over your body once again. Your gummy walls clamping down on his shaft and welcoming him once more. He groans and pushes you into the mating press and chases his own high. He captures your lips once again and gives you a deep but sloppy kiss while pushing your legs more apart. If he fucks a baby into you, you wouldn't try to run away, right? Since you would carry the obvious sign that you belonged to him. So those trashy guys won't dare to lay their filthy hands on you ever again.
If they do, he will erase them from existence. He moans to your lips, the thought of you carrying his child, with full of his seed, pushing him over the edge as he thrusts again, spilling thick robs of cum inside you, his eyes rolling back. He pushes his dick deeper into you, ensuring that nothing goes to waste. You whimper and kiss him back as tears fall once more, this time from overstimulation. When he recovers from his high, he pulls his dick out and rolls to the side.
Gently pulling you into a hug to his chest, facing him, you hug him back and kiss his Adam's apple softly. You felt tired and sleepy; for a few minutes, you two just stayed like that.
"So Mrs. Dostoevsky want me to draw a warm bath for you?"
You were flushed and slowly drifting off to sleep. The only thing you could mutter was a quiet "mmhm" and a slight tilt of your head.
Rain was still hitting the windows, as if it was trying to sing you a lullaby. The last thing you heard before falling asleep was a faint chuckle, followed by a couple of arms wrapping around your body, enveloping you in a familiar warmth.
Well, you were gonna come back to him one way or another. He knew that; he was sure of it, of course, since he is smart, right? When you come back to him and accept his vulnerability, once again he will let it happen because you are his. He can't predict what will happen in the future with you because God must have created such a bond that even after everything, you are still drawn to him, and he will always accept his pure girl to his hell and cherish ruin his angel. He can't create heaven nor go to one, but he will do everything to bring one to you.
But now Fyodor wasn't sleeping, but rather watching how your little body was wrapped around his—all vulnerable and untainted—to his liking, of course. He squeezed your body slightly in a possessive manner, pressing his body deeper into yours. He will make all the ways back to him for you. He was going to make it happen. So you could return to him. Because you're his innocent wife. How foolish of you to believe that a simple piece of paper could end your relationship with him. He was certain that God created you specifically for him to hold, caress, and breed. Everything happened only so you could return to where you belong, as God intended.
A few disagreements aren't the problem when you are in his arms like this, being all beautiful and innocent. How pure and filthy, how separating and unifying. Even God had his favorites, so it is normal that you also have a little privilege for yourself. How magnificent, right?
Because you are still his, and always will be. He will make sure of it.
Taglist: @sssarrrra @fyology @literatureloverx
So just for you guys to know I’ve never touched a man in my life. I didn't even feel anything romantic towards someone but here I am writing fanfiction about a death author dude who is probably +500 years old in an anime and I'm calling him bbg and the love of my life. Huh 😮💨 life is really full of surprises. It was my first time writing smut so please be nice I tried my best okay? 🥺🙏 Also English is not my first language so if there are any grammatical mistakes forgive this pookie (me🥺). Hope you like it tho. Comments, reblogs are greatly appreciated 💜
#fyodor bsd#bsd fyodor#bsd smut#bsd fyodor x reader#fyodor x reader#fyodor dostoyevsky x reader#fyodor x you#bsd x reader#hurt/comfort#bsd x you#fyodor dostoevsky x reader#fyodor smut#fyodor dostoyevsky smut#fyodor bungou stray dogs#bungou stray dogs fyodor#bungou stray dogs smut#bungou stray dogs x reader#bungou stray dogs x you
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An Unorthodox Method
Poe Dameron x F!Reader
Rating : 18+/E
Word count : 7600 (ish)
Warnings : It's the one bed trope!, Lil mild angst, lots of teasing, Poe being an adorable little shit, mentions of Poe having hearing problems/being partially deaf in one ear, fluff, banter, SMUT, PIV, fingering, marking (love bites and nail marks), praise kink if you squint, illusions to cum eating, mentions of oral f- receiving, overstimulation if you blink, aftercare, very brief mention of casual sex/one night stands.
Summary : All you want is a hot shower, some clean dry clothes, and to crawl into bed. What you absolutely do not want is Poe Dameron in that bed with you.
@campingwiththecharmings thank you so much for this request! I'm so excited to finally do the one bed trope for Poe! I hope you like it.
Special thank you to @mandinlore for the beta 😘
~~~~~~~~~
The rain hammers a steady ping ping ping on the window as you and Poe stand in the doorway to the room, your clothes soaked and sticking uncomfortably to your skin, your shoes leaving puddles of water.
"You have got to be kidding me!" You groan as Poe laughs.
You had been looking forward to a hot shower, a nice warm bed, and at least a good few hours of peace and quiet. The last part had already been thwarted by the fact some error in the hotel booking meant you only had one room with no others available, and now to add insult to injury there was only one damn bed.
"Well, this is going to be fun!" The pilot chirps happily from beside you, walking in to dump his bag on the chair and leaving wet boot prints in his wake.
Climbing into bed with the resistance's best looking pilot, who you were, if you were honest, a little bit in love with, did not constitute as fun. In fact, after the day you had spent with him, it was the very last thing you wanted to do.
Poe was always, and had always, been chatty, but today he seemed to have turned all his dials up to maximum. He'd talked non stop, made unfunny jokes, inappropriate innuendos that with anyone else you suspect he wouldn't have gotten away with, and done just about anything he could to make himself the most annoying person this side of the galaxy.
For what reason, you had no idea. You had started to suspect perhaps he had realised your warm feelings towards him, and maybe this was his way of making you hate him so he didn't have to let you down, and honestly, you might think it was starting to work.
Trudging into the room, your boots squelching with each step, you place your bags down, resigned to your probably sleepless fate.
"You want the bathroom first?" The pilot offers, despite the fact he's worse off than you, having given you his jacket to hold above your head the moment the downpour started. It hadn't helped much after the first few minutes, but you had been grateful for the shelter anyway.
You don't really register his question, your thoughts lost as you finger the worn leather coat remembering the way his scent clung to it, invading your senses as you splashed through the flooded streets.
"Hey," you look up to find the pilot watching you, his brow furrowed. "You okay?"
You drop the jacket onto the dresser, giving him a smile and a nod.
"Just sick of listening to you."
Poe snorts with laughter, grabbing the hem of his shirt and peeling it up over his head. You purposely busy yourself pulling out some dry clothes from your pack , not allowing yourself to peek, although it's a difficult battle.
"There's nobody you love listening to more than me," Poe states, thankfully not seeming to notice your internal fight of keeping your eyes off him.
You sigh, somewhat thankful his annoying cockyness is a distraction from his semi-nakedness. Picking up your sleepwear and wash bag you head towards the bathroom, trying to ignore him. Poe however gives you no quarter, trailing along behind you.
"So what exactly are the sleeping arrangements going to be?" He asks.
Frowning you turn around, your eyes deciding to flicker over his bared torso before meeting his gaze. Even the smallest glance is enough to get blood rushing through your veins, and you can feel heat blossoming across your cheeks.
Ignoring the feeling you gesture to the bed with a raise of your eyebrow.
"But what if you snore?" The pilot asks, clearly not noticing your desire to leave the room until he's decided to put some clothes on.
You pull a face, not quite understanding his issue when he's half deaf from the war anyway. The explosion that had damaged most of the resistance ships had permanently damaged his eardrums, which Poe liked to use to his advantage when he decided he wasn't going to listen to someone, although you think he hears far more than he lets on.
"Poe, you can hardly hear out of one ear as it is! Just sleep on your good ear and you probably won't hear a thing out of the other one."
He folds his arms stubbornly. "I'll hear if you're right next to my head."
"Then you are more than welcome to sleep in the bathroom once I'm done," you offer, stepping into the tiny fresher.
"Nah, I'd rather sleep in the bed. But what if you steal the covers?"
"Then you can take them back."
"What if you cuddle me in your sleep?" He fires quickly.
You give him a withering look, trying not to think about pressing your body against his, keeping your eyes trained on his face.
"Oh trust me Poe, I won't." In fact you will do everything possible not to touch him, just for your own sanity.
"But you might. I'm very into consent and if I'm asleep-" he pauses mid sentence, opening his mouth and then closing it again before leaning against the door frame. "Actually scratch all of that. I absolutely give you consent to do whatever you like to me."
The pilot grins at you and you feel a familiar surge of heat through your body, collecting and coiling in your abdomen. Combined with your patience finally snapping, it's the last straw. You slam the bathroom door in his handsome smug face.
The lukewarm shower really tops off the day.
~
"I've been thinking" Poe starts the moment he exits the bathroom, after loudly complaining through the door about you using up all the hot water.
You pinch the bridge of your nose with a sigh, the hope that he would have calmed down and go straight to sleep evaporating. You are grateful however that he's at least finally put a shirt on.
"That must hurt."
"Oi!" He protests with a shocked expression, that at least brings a little smile to your lips. He grins at you, letting you know he took no offence at your words.
"As I was saying," he continues while you lay out his clothes to dry, the ones he dumped in a wet pile in the middle of the floor. "I've been thinking, and I know what's wrong with you. I want you to know it's okay."
The way his voice suddenly goes so gentle makes you look around. The pilot holds out his hand, wrapping his fingers around yours as he pulls you closer, holding your gaze steadily. You hope he doesn't notice the way your breath catches, or the heat blazing through you that makes your hands clammy.
"It's okay to be nervous," he continues, while your mouth goes dry. "I know spending the night with me is a lot, and it's going to be so difficult for you to keep your hands to yourself, but we are going to get through this together, and you'll be able to tell everyone about it when we get home."
You snatch your hand angrily out of his while the pilot bursts into laughter.
"Grow up and get in the damn bed!" You growl, climbing into bed, pulling the covers up to your chin and turning over away from him, your heart thundering in your chest. How, even when he was joking, did he manage to get so damn close to the truth?
"Why do you want me in bed so badly, huh? Thinking about late night cuddles?" You hear the pilot ask, feeling the mattress sink with his weight.
"No. When you're asleep, you're not talking," you bite out, still stinging from the embarrassment of your reaction when he was just being his usual annoying self.
Poe ignores your hostility and you feel him shrug.
"Listen, all I'm trying to do is tell you that we could eliminate some of this sexual tension. Well, if you wanted to."
Sexual tension wasn't exactly what you would say was between you, but there was always certainly something, although with Poe you imagine he had that with everyone. With you though, your feelings for the pilot ran a little deeper, not that you'd ever dare speak those aloud. The last thing you needed was the "it's not you, it's me" speech, especially if his behaviour was to drive you away. Best to let sleeping dogs lie.
You run a hand down your face with an exasperated sigh. "There is absolutely no sexual tension, Poe. What there is, is murderous tension."
Poe lets out an exclamation of excitement.
"Oh my favourite kind!"
You bite the inside of your cheek to stop a smile, lest you encourage him to continue.
"Please Poe, go to damn sleep," you whine, pulling the pillow from under your head and pressing it against your ear, trying to block out his incessant rambling.
"I will if you admit it."
"Admit what?" You groan, frustrated. Why can't he just shut the hell up and let you get through this?
"That you've thought about us."
"Poe I swear-" you take a deep breath, grabbing the cushion with one hand, rolling over with the intent on smothering him into silence. You're surprised to find the pilot on his side, almost nose to nose with you in the small bed.
"You've seriously never thought about us kissing?" Poe interrupts.
"I…I…" you’re thrown by his closeness, by his long lashes and soft smile, by the damn doe eyed look he's giving you.
You know there's no shutting him up until you tell him what he wants to hear so you take a breath. It wouldn't exactly be news to him, Poe knew just about everyone had considered kissing him at some point or another. The man did come with a reputation for having a rather skillful mouth after all.
"Fine! Maybe once or twice. Now go to damn sleep!" You growl, annoyed at him, and yourself.
The shit eating grin he gives you is enough to make you turn back over, tucking the pillow under your head and shutting your eyes tightly, as though that alone might drown him out.
"I knew it," he gloats with a happy sigh, clicking off the bedside lamp.
You grip the pillow, considering the option you still have of smothering him.
Thankfully he's quiet from that point and infuriatingly asleep in less than five minutes. You can feel the mattress move with his slow steady breaths.
Glancing over your shoulder he's laid out on his back, one arm tucked under his head, his lashes fluttering against his cheeks as he dreams, his full lips open with a soft sigh.
Turning around again you punch the lumpy pillow, trying to get more comfortable.
You will not think about kissing him. That was a one time thing. Okay, maybe three or four. Well maybe more… a lot more. You're determined tonight for once, you will not fall asleep thinking about his mouth on yours, you will absolutely not think about his lips on your skin, or his fingers caressing your breasts…
Someone suddenly shakes you and you open your eyes groggily, the room swimming and blurred as you blink sleep from your vision.
"What the hell?" You grumble, looking up at the pilot with his sleep tousled curls, still half asleep himself, one eye still shut and the other half open, bathed in the soft moonlight glow that sneaks through the blinds.
"You said my name," he mumbles, voice still sleep gravelled. "You alright?"
Flashes of his mouth sealed over your nipple, his tongue darting out to lick a path down to your navel, your hand gripping his hair, his mouth between your thighs.
Oh no. You absolutely did not have a sex dream about him. Not now, not here. Please no!
"You must have dreamt it," you swallow, desperately trying to play it cool. If Poe heard you while he was dead asleep, then you must have been loud. You feel the heat prickling the back of your neck.
"No, I definitely heard you say Poe," he insists.
"Well even if I did I'm fine so you can go back to sleep," you insist, shifting your legs restlessly. You're too warm. Well not just warm, burning hot, sweat cooling on your skin, an uncomfortable ache between your legs that screams of unsatisfied desire.
"You sure? You sounded a bit…breathless?" The pilot asks again, genuine concern in his tone. Although you can barely see him in the dim lighting you can still see the frown pulling his brows together, both eyes now open and studying you. You really don't want him to press any further. Even his voice brings back flashes of the dream, sultry whispers in your ear, his tongue lapping at your folds, the cry of his name from your mouth.
You swallow again, pushing the thoughts away.
"Really, I'm fine. Must have been a nightmare if it involved you anyway."
"Ouch." He holds his hands over his chest, collapsing back onto the mattress as though you wounded him, giving a long drawn out dramatic death rattle.
Pulling up the covers you throw them over his head with a laugh.
"Go back to sleep, Flyboy."
Laying back you shuffle as close to the edge as you can, putting as much distance as possible between you and the pilot. You wonder if it would be better for you to stay awake, just in case your dreams come back to haunt you. You absolutely wouldn't get away with saying his name a second time.
"It's okay you know," Poe speaks suddenly into the darkness as you lay rigid beside him. "If you were dreaming about me. I wouldn't mind."
You can't help but snort with laughter at that.
"You wouldn't mind if anyone dreams about you."
"True," Poe admits. You feel him shift and even though you can't see him, your eyes staring up at the ceiling, his gaze burns you.
"Let me rephrase. I'd like it if you dreamt about me." He continues.
When you don't turn to face him or grace him with an answer, you feel the shift of the mattress again as he lays back.
"I'm sorry," he sighs, and for once it sounds genuine, not a hint of playfulness in his tone. "I thought this would cheer you up. It's been a long week and you've just seemed so… I don't know. Not yourself, like you're bottling everything up. I figured maybe if you were thinking about how annoying I was, or making you laugh and fight with me, it would give you a bit of a distraction and an outlet, but I get it, maybe I took it too far, even if it is the truth."
It had been a long week, the longest in fact. While the mission itself had been a success, you had seen a lot of the First Order's destruction in the process, and it was worse than either of you had realised. You'd felt melancholy for days, the sights you've witnessed replaying in your mind. You hadn't noticed it much at the time, too lost in your own thoughts and angry that he was so loud that it was impossible to hear yourself think, but the more you think about it, the more you realise what he's been doing — trying to make you smile, keeping you distracted, making you focus on anything but what's happened. All you've done is complain to him about it.
Guilt twists hard in your stomach.
How typical of Poe to try and be helpful in the most unconventional way.
Part of you wants to reach for him, to cuddle him tight against you and thank him, to tell him you're here for him too if he needs someone. The other part keeps you rigidly pinned to the mattress, afraid to move in case so much as a finger brushes up against him, unsure if you can hold yourself back with the lingering memory of the dream.
"You mean the truth is that you really are worried I snore?" You ask, trying to break the unbearable tension.
His answer is the most serious he's sounded all day. There isn't a trace of humour, of teasing, just a tiredness, the kind that comes from pretending to smile all day, the kind that signals a surrender.
"No, I could live with that. I mean the dreaming part. I'd like it if you dreamt about me."
"Oh." You can't find anything else to say to that, your heart hammering so loudly in your chest you're sure even through his damaged ear he can hear it.
The ongoing silence suddenly feels heavy, like a crushing weight on your chest, the truth feels like lead in your belly. Poe hasn't made a single noise in a while but you get the distinct feeling he isn't asleep. You wonder if he's laying still too, muddling through his thoughts.
You can't take back your behaviour towards him but you can at least give him something in return.
"Poe?"
The response is instant, "Yeah?"
You take a breath, swallowing hard, your fingers twisting into the sheet at the edge of the bed, nervously gripping them.
"Every day," you whisper quietly.
"Huh?"
You feel a slight shift as he must turn to look at you.
You clear your throat, staring hard enough at the ceiling that your eyes start to burn, repeating yourself louder.
"I said every day. I lied earlier. It's not once or twice. I think about kissing you every day. I have for a while," you admit.
A sudden blinding light obscures your vision, making you cry out in surprise and squeeze your eyes shut against the sudden intrusion. Coloured lights flash behind your eyelids and you have to blink a few times in order to see anything.
When the room comes back into focus Poe is sitting bolt upright in the bed, staring down at you, the bedside lamp illuminating his head like a synthetic halo.
"You were dreaming about me!"
With a groan you grab the pillow and hold it over your own face, deciding if you can't smother him you could just smother yourself instead, which seems like the better option than actually having this conversation.
You feel the pillow tug back gently, but you hold fast, refusing to give it up.
"Come on, let go and talk to me. You've said it now." A grunt of effort and a hard tug on the pillow before Poe sighs. "I'm not going away so you're either going to suffocate or talk."
"Then I'll suffocate," you mumble into the pillow, already regretting saying anything.
"You know I can't hear you right? Come on." This time he tucks his fingers under yours and peels them off the pillow cover until it falls halfway off your face.
"Better," he smiles, letting go of your hands to remove it entirely. "Why are you hiding from me?"
"I don't want to see your smug smile about how right you are," you glare, trying to hide your embarrassment that you've blurted out exactly what you've been trying to conceal from him. Once more, Poe takes your attitude in his stride.
"I've thought about kissing you too, you know? In fact I've thought about kissing you at least four times since you woke me up." He gives a shrug, like you should know that, like it's completely utterly normal for someone to think about kissing you that many times in the space of ten minutes.
You bite your lip, familiar tendrils of desire reigniting in your belly. Your body, still clearly on edge from your illicit dream, thrums with tension.
"So why haven't you done it yet?"
Poe rolls his eyes, as though the answer is obvious. "Clearly I'm building up the sexual tension for it!"
You're done letting him have the upper hand in this. In a surge of confidence, and to stop the smug look on his face, you wrap your hand around the back of the pilot's neck, before you pull his lips to yours. You feel Poe's brief smile, probably of victory, against your mouth before he kisses you back.
It's soft at first, almost sweet tender kisses, short and playful, getting to know each other. He kisses your top and bottom lip, he gives you tiny pecks of affection, he licks playfully at your bottom lip.
Effortlessly he shifts his weight over you, slotting himself between your thighs as though you were made to fit together. His tongue licks into your mouth, slick and hot, sliding against your own as he presses his body against yours, your kisses descending into something much more passionate.
Maker, the rumours weren't wrong. He is good at this, better than good actually, infuriatingly good. You can't even find any fault to tease him about.
You tangle your fingers in his curls, tugging gently and causing the pilot to moan into your mouth. You give a shiver of desire at the sound, your mind filled with thoughts of how you can draw it from him in other ways. Poe's mind seems to be on a similar track, his hips grinding against yours, pressing himself against your core and causing you to let out a gasp of surprise at the jolt of pleasure.
Perhaps there was a little sexual tension after all.
The pilot pulls away, his chest heaving, eyes dark and lips kiss swollen, his curls messy and tousled from your fingers.
"Fuck, sorry. I didn't mean to get carried away so quickly," he apologises, swallowing hard as he clearly tries to get a handle on himself, holding his body off yours, allowing a brief respite for you both to collect yourselves.
"I don't mind getting carried away," you admit, still feeling feverish with his closeness, your mind filled with the fantasy of your dreams. You raise your hips, pressing up against his clothed length, making the pilot let out a choked moan of surprise before his eyes darken.
"Well in that case," he grins, recovering all too quickly. Desire coils in your belly and before you can drag his mouth back to yours, in true Poe fashion, he continues talking. "Why don't you tell me what I was doing in this dream of yours?"
You give him a coy smile. As if he's going to get it out of you that easily.
"Fulfilling my deepest fantasy," you answer as Poe licks his lips, eagerly leaning forward to listen.
"Oh yeah? What fantasy might that be?"
"You were quiet for a whole five minutes," you sigh dreamily. It takes a second to register with him before he leans back bursting out laughing. You can't help but start to giggle yourself.
"Okay, I deserved that!" He laughs. "My methods may be unorthodox, but they work!"
He was entirely correct in that him being his usual annoying self was exactly what you had needed as a distraction, although you're sure there were less annoying ways to achieve the same means.
"I don't know. I actually considered murdering you at least a few times. Maybe I still will, when you're fast asleep and least expecting it," you warn, running a finger along your throat in a playful threat.
Poe hums, leaning back down over you, caging you to the bed with his arms.
"What exactly makes you think either of us will be going back to sleep?"
Oh.
There's another rush of heat that tingles against your skin, shooting straight down to your aching core. It's not at all helped by the fact Poe leans down to capture your lips, his tongue slipping between your teeth as he moves one hand to grip your hip, sliding it slowly up your body and under your shirt to trail his fingers across your breast.
You moan into his mouth as he rolls your peaked nipple between his fingers, grinding yourself up against him, uncaring of whatever commentary he wants to make as long as you can deal with this rapidly intensifying desire.
When he finally pulls away once more it's hard to get your breath, especially as he continues to steal little kisses from you, his fingers still resting against your skin.
Bracing himself on one arm above you, the other slides down to tiptoe over your hip.
"Do I have your consent to remove these ugly pants?" He grins teasingly, pulling at the waistband of your shorts. They had seen better days in all fairness but you hadn't really considered anyone else seeing them.
"Hey, they aren't that bad! Not like you're the pinnacle of fashion." In retaliation you poke your finger through a hole in the leg of his threadbare sleep pants, making the pilot laugh.
"These are my lucky pants."
You can't help but snort with a roll of your eyes. "That's the stupidest thing I've heard."
Poe raises one eyebrow, a smug smile tugging at his lips.
"They got you into my bed didn't they?"
You scoff, "The hotel management got me into this bed."
"You know what, you're right. Maybe I should go thank them now," Poe muses, his grin turning into a laugh as you wrap your arms around him, preventing him from leaving.
"Will you please just stop talking?" You laugh, wondering how much of the night is even left. You swear if the sun rises and you haven't resolved this, you will combust of need, and you will take the pilot out with you.
Poe raises his eyebrows.
"Well, I would, but you still haven't answered my original question."
You stare at him, trying to figure out what exactly he's talking about before you realise.
"For the love of… Yes Poe, I give you consent to do whatever you want to me as long as you stop dragging this out like a massive tease!"
The pilot lets out a soft chuckle, leaning down to brush his nose against yours, a soft gesture in a stark contrast to what leaves his mouth, "dangerous words, sweetheart."
You almost shudder with the flash of desire that bolts through you, making sharp heat rush across your skin and your pussy clench.
"I need you to make me a promise first though," his fingers slip across your abdomen, resting just above the waistband of your pants. The feverish desire at his touch is overshadowed by annoyance that he's still talking. Maker, you swear he won't survive till sunrise.
"Po-
"I'm going to need you to be loud," he purrs in your ear, cutting you off as his hand slips under your waistband. "I don't want to miss a single noise you make."
Even if you wanted to be quiet, the pad of his finger slipping across your clit causes your body to react in a primal way, letting out an embarrassing loud moan for such a little touch.
Poe chuckles.
"Just like that." He praises, sliding his finger down further to dip into your entrance, letting out a soft groan of his own at how wet you are, before he drags it back up, spreading your slick over your aching clit and making you whine again. "Can you do that for me? Can you be loud enough?"
The best you can muster is a whimper as he slowly thrusts his finger knuckle deep into you.
"Nu-huh," Poe chides, "loud."
A second finger quickly joins the first, stretching your walls and filling you more than your own ever could. This time you arch your back off the bed, chasing the blissful feeling as a much louder groan tears itself from your throat.
"Better," Poe grins. "I heard that one."
You want to smother him, you want to kiss him, but most of all, despite his annoying little smug smile, you still desperately want to fuck him.
You decide on option two, at least for the moment, pulling his lips down to yours.
His tongue licks into your mouth as he thrusts his fingers inside you at a leisurely pace, swallowing each whine and moan you give at the pleasure skittering and coiling in you.
Poe curls his fingers, pressing up against that spot inside you, making you pull away from his kiss to throw your head back in pleasure, a loud groan of his name escaping. You're half expecting him to make some sort of cocky comment, but Poe seems as lost in this as you are. He drops his head to press open mouthed kisses across your neck, biting and sucking, marking and claiming you as his.
When he works a third finger into you, his thumb brushing against your clit, you come undone. Normally you would feel embarrassed about how loud you are, the way your body shudders and heaves, your pussy clenching hard around his fingers, but the shaky little fuck Poe groans in your ear, obliterates any notion of embarrassment.
As you come down from your high, your body still trembling from the aftershock, whining as he slips his fingers from you, you realise he's breathing almost as heavily as you are, his breath coming out in short pants as he looks you over.
"I need to fuck you," he growls, clearly struggling with his own needs.
You're already nodding before he gets halfway through his request. Whatever he needs, whatever he wants, you'll give it to him without hesitation.
He all but tears your pyjamas from you, making short work of removing them and throwing them across the room, before his join the unceremonious pile on the floor.
This time you allow yourself to look, you allow yourself to take in his broad chest, the little scars crisscrossed with a larger one, old and new, your gaze trailing down across his abdomen to the line of hair that guides your eyes down to -
"Are you done admiring?" Poe's amused tone makes your eyes snap back up to his, your face growing warm with embarrassment that you've been caught staring, although you know he has probably done exactly the same to you.
"I don't know about admiring," you shrug as though your pussy isn't pulsing at the thought of him burying his cock deep inside you. "Think the resistance needs to re-evaluate their best looking pilot status."
Poe simply grins at you, seeing through your nonchalance all too clearly.
"Good to know you like what you see. Tell me, how wet did it make you to see me earlier, all soaked and shirtless?"
"Didn't," is all you are able to punch out as he leans down, pressing his body against yours, rolling his hips just slightly so his hard cock brushes against your slick folds, holding himself at your entrance like the tease he is.
"Really?" He smirks, "Somehow I think you are lying. But alright, I'll get the truth out of you, one way or another." The threat gives you a rush of excitement, wondering exactly how he's going to do that. Not that you're going to let him know that so easily.
"Are you going to keep talking or are we going to-" your question cuts off into a gasp of pleasure as he presses himself inside you, slowly, so you can feel every vein and ridge as he stretches your walls.
"Are we going to what?" He grins.
You slap his arm in reply but there's no power behind it, you're too busy concentrating on the wet noise as he pulls out of you before slowly pressing back in, making you whimper in need. The first time your pussy clenches around him it's involuntary, the second time it's just to enjoy the little groan the action draws from the pilot.
"Stop," he warns, his head dropping to your shoulder, clearly trying to steady his breathing as you clench around him a third time, just for fun. "Taking it slow."
"You don't have to take it slow," you assure him. For a moment you think it's sweet he's considering your comfort but you're more than ready for this.
"I want to," he grits as you clench around him again. The tone of his voice lets you know he's digging his stubborn heels in and nothing will change his mind. Even so you need more than he's offering. This has gone on too long, the tension is too much, the need drumming through your veins screams to be sated.
You whine, you beg, you plead, you drag your nails along his back and arch your hips against him, but he doesn't give. He rocks into you slowly, achingly slowly, maddeningly slowly, and for all your initial protests you enjoy every second of it.
The pleasure builds just as slow, each roll of his hips winding the cord tighter and tighter until you're sure you can't take any more, and then it pulls further. You can't do anything but surrender to the bliss it offers, raising your hips to meet his in the hopes his resolve will eventually break.
"You're incredible you know?" He pants against your mouth, sweat beading at his hairline, his curls sticking to his forehead, his eyes hooded and glazed. "Not just at this, but this too."
All you can do is stare at him, somewhat dazed, wondering how he's even thinking in coherent sentences right now, let alone speaking them. Somewhere your subconscious registers his words and it accompanies a host of butterflies in your belly.
"Just you, exactly as you are. You are incredible," he repeats, only this time it comes with a much harder thrust. You arch against him, your fingers digging into his shoulders as your head drops back against the pillows.
"Poe, please," you beg, unsure if you are able to take much more. Clearly neither can he, his name on your lips undoing his patience. He wraps his fingers around your thigh, hoisting your leg up over his hip as he sinks deeper into you, picking up the pace.
His hips slam into yours, filling the room with the sound of flesh on flesh, accompanied only by his curses and praises that fall freely and loudly. For all his requests for you to be loud the pilot's own moans are enough to drown yours out.
Working a hand between your bodies you press a finger to your clit, rubbing tight circles around the hardened nub as Poe angles his hips, pressing up against the blissful spot inside you. Your whole body almost arches up off the bed with the combined pleasure catapulting through you, an almost screamed curse fighting its way out of your throat.
Poe groans low and shakily, barely holding his own climax back, his thrusts becoming messy and mistimed.
"That's it baby. Fuck wanna feel you cum, wanna hear you," he groans, completely wrecked.
That's all it takes. Your orgasm hits suddenly and brightly, your whole body writhing and stiffening as the pleasure overtakes you, coursing through your veins like lava, making your vision go white as you tremble through it. Poe had wanted to hear you, but the purely feral noise you let out, you wouldn't be surprised if the whole damn hotel heard you. You're sure Poe would probably enjoy it if they did.
It's almost too much for your oversensitive body to feel Poe thrusting into you faster and harder, chasing his own end, babbled curses and praises falling from his lips. You shake with overstimulation when his hips stutter, emptying himself deep inside you, your nails leaving crescent moons on his shoulders as you cling desperately to him, your thighs trembling, chest heaving as you try to catch your breath.
Poe half collapses on you, letting your leg down slowly as he presses soft kisses to your neck, against every love bite he's given you in the heat of the moment. You suspect there may be quite a few questions when you get back to the base tomorrow. Turning your head you press a soft kiss to his cheek, making him lean up to look at you.
"Better than you dreamt?" He grins, still flushed and panting.
"I didn't dream about that," you giggle breathlessly, shaking limbs melting into the mattress, sated and tired. Poe raises his eyebrows, letting out a thoughtful hum before he suddenly pulls out of you, making you whimper and immediately miss the feeling of him inside you.
Shuffling down your body he presses a soft kiss between your breasts. You frown at him, confused by his sudden movement and how he still has so much energy. How is it you're a wrecked mess and he's still acting like he can go another ten rounds? Why can't he just be still for one second?
Another kiss to your ribs, first the right side, then the left, moving slowly down, before he pauses, looking up through his lashes at you.
"You didn't dream about us making love?"
You go to make fun of his choice of language but before you have a chance he licks a hot stripe down to your naval, making your breath catch with the sudden rush of pleasure. You're starting to question if he's able to read your thoughts, if he knows the truth of your dream already. Perhaps you had said more than just his name in your sleep?
"Nope, not about us," you breathe unsteadily, trying to hold yourself back from begging anything from him again. You suspect you know what's coming next and honestly, you're not sure if your body is able to handle it, barely over your first two climaxes. Still you weren't about to give in to his questions, he'd never shut up if you admit it. "Told you, I wasn't dreaming about you."
"You are a terrible liar," Poe states, his hands gripping your thighs, pushing them apart. The rush of cold air against your heated flesh makes you gasp and the pilot smirks, his eyes flickering down to your swollen cunt, leaking with your combined climax before coming back to you, a devilish grin taking over his face.
"'Whatever I want to do to you' still stand?" He asks.
All you can do is nod mutely, a fresh wave of need building despite your exhaustion.
"Good," Poe grins, pinning your thighs to the mattress, preventing you from moving. "Because I'm going to get the truth out of you my way."
He does exactly that. He drags the truth out of you to every question he wants answered and more, twice with his mouth, then again with his cock, reducing you to a babbling trembling mess, willing to tell him whatever he wanted to know, and he's infuriatingly smug about it.
~
Poe had been surprisingly tender afterwards. He'd carefully cleaned you up, brought you a glass of water, massaged your sore muscles, before he'd finally pulled you into his arms, holding you close against him.
Of course you had known Poe was kind, of course you knew he took care of the people he was close to, even those who only spent the night with him. There were enough stories around the base to give you a general idea of that, but for some reason you can't place this felt different, it felt intimate.
What surprised you more than anything was how quiet he was now. Appart from a few murmured words about how good you had been for him, and to check you were alright, he hadn't said much at all. It was almost unnerving after his behaviour all day. Really if you had known this would have shut him up you might have jumped on him hours ago. But now, the silence seems worrying.
"You okay?" You ask, your head still against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat as his fingers draw mindless patterns against your back.
"Yeah, I'm okay. I was just thinking…maybe we can do this again? Sometime soon? Be in the same bed I mean." The pilot asks. He doesn't sound like the cocky confident Flyboy you're expecting. If anything he sounds a little unsure of his own question.
You won't give him the satisfaction of the enthusiastic yes that tries to escape. The last thing you want out of this night is to become some regular casual hook-up. Poe wasn't exactly known for keeping long term relationships, citing the fact it was too difficult during the middle of a war, which you suppose you could understand. He was at least always very clear about that with whoever he got involved with.
Equally you don't want to say no. You want this, him. You want the moments of passion and quiet, you want the teasing and fights, you want more in whatever way you can.
In the end you go for the middle ground, giving him an option of more, while closely guarding yourself against this being a casual fuck.
"Hmm, suppose if you buy me dinner first then I might consider it. I don't make a habit of sleeping with people without dates."
It's disarmingly sweet when he presses a soft kiss to your head, tightening his arm around you. Your chest aches all the more for moments like this.
"Alright. A date it is." You can hear the smile in his voice, sleepy and happy.
You didn't exactly expect him to agree to that so easily, and while it gives you a flutter of hope, you don't quite trust he catches your meaning.
"I said I'd consider, I didn't say I'd agree. I might have other options," you warn, trying to get him to consider what he wants you to be to him.
Poe lets out a soft chuckle.
"You say that like your pretending it wasn't the best fuck of your life, and you're desperate to do it again."
You lean up on your arm to look at him, raising an eyebrow and fixing him with an unimpressed look at his cockyness.
"Tell me I'm wrong," he challenges confidently, "because if I am, then I'm just going to have to keep trying. The aim is to make you fall hopelessly in love with me eventually."
"Through sex?" You laugh, ignoring the now familiar butterflies that tell you he might be closer to his aim than he knows.
Poe shrugs, "through whatever necessary means, as long as I get to keep you as mine."
It's almost a knee jerk reaction to open your mouth and tell him you aren't a pet or property to be owned, but as you meet his gaze you realise you are once more judging him a little too quickly and all too harshly. It's clear he means more than that, his gaze open and vulnerable.
A warm feeling of familiarity, of safety, of something bigger, spreads through your very bones, something that shows there is much more than lust and affection, perhaps for both of you.
Your response is much softer than your initial reaction might have been, had you not taken a moment.
"Take me to dinner tomorrow then?"
"I think tomorrow might be today," Poe smiles, nodding towards the window where the faint pink light of dawn is starting to peek through the drawn blinds. You groan knowing sunrise both means you really should untangle yourself from the pilot and head back to base.
"Well honestly I think I've had enough of you for one day." You tease, pushing yourself off him and sitting up, debating if you can handle another cold shower. In all honesty a cold shower is probably exactly what you need after you make the mistake of glancing down at Poe, still naked, the sheet barely covering his more private parts, his curls messy from your fingers, peering up at you with a half smile.
"We both know you can never get enough of me," Poe states, before he wraps his arms around you and drags you back down onto the bed. He throws one leg over yours, effectively trapping you next to him as he snuggles up close to you.
You don't bother fighting, too tired from the night's activity to argue your way out of his grip. Sighing you sink into the bed, allowing your eyes to flutter closed.
"I knew this would work," Poe hums happily in your ear. You mumble enough of a sound to make him realise you're asking what he means.
"Getting you in a hotel room with me would make you admit you wanted me."
You give another tired hum in acknowledgement before his words finally hit you, and you sit up to stare at him, suddenly wide awake. Poe grins back at you, knowing exactly what you are thinking.
"Tell me this was not some plan to get me into bed!"
Poe feigns a comedic shocked expression, holding one hand to his chest as he stares open mouthed at you.
"Of course not! What do you think of me? Why is your opinion of me is so low that you think I'd go as far to break the ship engine, so we'd be stuck here alone, find the busiest hotel on this planet, specifically book one room knowing the others would be booked already by the time we got here, ask for the smallest bed-"
He doesn't get to continue. Picking up the pillow you repeatedly hit him hard with it while Poe laughs, holding his hands up in surrender.
"I'm joking. I'm joking, I swear," he laughs, grabbing his own pillow and hitting you back. "I'd never purposely break a ship."
"You manipulative little shit,"
Neither of you surrender until the bed is covered with feathers, the pillowcases empty and discarded, your limbs tangled together, lips pressed against sweat salted skin. This time it's you who pries the truth from him, your way.
"My methods may be unorthodox but -" he gets no further before you smack him in the face with your pillow, causing him to dissolve into laughter once more.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Text
— when you get him a birthday cake
Masterlist.
It’s been a while and this has sat dusty and half-finished in my drafts for months, so Happy Birthday, Bakugou.🥺
Warnings: none. Pure fluff, not proofread.
Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x f!reader.
Word Count: 1.7k.
Bakugou had never really celebrated his birthday, at least not since he was a child. Far too old for children’s party games and toys (although he’d still scour the internet for vintage All Might action figures as a gift to himself, because those most definitely weren’t toys).
But the thing that irritated him more than anything about his special day was the fact that everyone else seemed far more excited about it than him. Masses of texts from his friends, messages online and an influx of gifts from fans all trying to wish him a very Happy Birthday. News outlets and media suddenly in talks with his PR team to try and get an interview with him on the actual day; when truth be told he’d have agreed to it if they’d offered the day before. The tower of paperwork he was trying to work through had become tiresome and he was hoping for a distraction.
How was it that the world seemed more excited about his Birthday than the Number Two hero was himself?
Heaving a sigh as he stopped the incessant blaring of his phone alarm before wincing through tired, narrowed eyes at the bright light of his phone. The screen completely covered in well wishes that seemed to have started when the clock struck twelve. A few trying to coax him out after work for drinks and to celebrate, those he swiftly ignored. It wasn’t until he scrolled down to a message from Mina practically threatening him to go out that he groaned low and deep in his chest; how was it that his friends were trying to dictate how he spent his birthday every damn year? He’d be happy with a bowl of noodles from his favourite hole in the wall and maybe a slice of cake from the quaint bakery he liked to frequent on Sundays. Now he was going to have to stay up late, and probably carry an inebriated Kirishima home.
By the time he’d made it into the office, Bakugou had put his phone onto do not disturb. Sick of the constant stream of messages that didn’t seem to dissipate. Another thing to add to the list of things that irked him about his special day— and he hadn’t even received the call from his Mother yet. Less of a call to send him well wishes, and more an excuse to remind him that he’s another year older and still painfully single and she’s still without a grandchild. Running a palm down the length of his face as he stepped into the elevator to take it up to his floor.
“Good morning, Dynamight,” You smiled from your desk as he walked past, “And happy birthday.”
“Thanks.” He rasped gruffly in response, it was the first time he’d used his voice all morning.
“I left you a coffee on your desk.”
God, you really were the best part about his day.
You were apprehensive when Bakugou walked by with a heavy set frown across is brow. It wasn’t unusual for him to be grumpy this early in the day, the Pro was definitely not a morning person— but he seemed even more annoyed today. And you were positive the influx of gifts that waited for him by the copier would only serve to irritate him more. Especially when a US limited edition All Might figure he’d ordered from overseas as a gift to himself had still not been delivered. Grimacing when you’d checked the tracking when you woke up this morning and noticed it sat in an airport postal office on the outskirts of Kawasaki; you knew he wouldn’t be happy.
And that’s why you were even more nervous for him to see the gift you’d left sitting on his desk. A gift that definitely couldn’t compare from the small fortune he’d spent on himself.
It was difficult thinking about the perfect gift to get a man that could buy himself anything he wanted, even more difficult when the man happened to be your boss. Any time you looked through shop windows at the various fragrances, gift sets and jewellery everything felt too ostentatious, too intimate. Putting down a garish tie that you wondered why you’d even thought about buying, and settling on a single purchase of an All Might themed birthday card you were certain was for children as you decided to make him something instead.
“What the fuck is this?” You heard Bakugou shout from his office and you felt your heart rattle against your ribcage.
Standing from your desk to open the parted door to see him standing in front of your gift. The All Might card already open and displayed on top of his desk as his attention now sat on the open white box that he’d unwrapped.
“It’s uh— a cake.” You smiled softly.
Bakugou raised a brow at your answer as he directed his gaze back to the cake that sat on top of his desk. Three tiers of soft sponge covered in a vibrant orange icing, with black lines decorating it to replicate the crosses that sat against his chest on his hero costume. You’d never claimed to be a baker, the cake nothing like the one you could’ve probably picked up from Bakugou’s favourite bakery. You knew the exact cakes he enjoyed too, but when googling recipes none seemed to be close to your level or expertise.
And what made it worse is the dessert had not travelled well on your morning commute. Holding tightly onto the box while you contended with the Musutafu rush hour had meant that the tiers had now begun to slide out of place as the cake sat leaning inside its box, now looking rather pathetic.
“A cake?” He repeated, his eyes glancing back down at the vanilla sponge that had a messy attempt of ‘Happy Birthday Dynamight’ scrawled across the top. The piping bag had not been kind to you when you attempted the design, wishing the text looked more like your handwriting and less like you’d baked with a four year old. Which was probably what your boss was thinking right now as he stared down at the sweet treat.
“I’m sorry,” You felt your cheeks burn, “I thought it would be a nice idea—”
“Did you make it yourself?” Bakugou asked, although it was clear that you had. Any shop that would dare to even attempt to sell a monstrosity like this should be shut down.
“Well, yeah,” You hovered in place, “I tried to follow the recipe, and I thought it was going well, but I think I put too much buttercream on, and I’m not very good at piping—”
You found yourself rambling, and it just made you feel worse. Reaching over to flip the cardboard lid back over it to take it away and shield yourself from any further embarrassment.
“Are you not going to have some with me?” Bakugou stopped you from closing the lid completely, his crimson eyes full of sincerity.
“Cake for breakfast? It’s not even nine am—”
“So?” He scoffed, “It’s my birthday. If I can’t have cake for breakfast today then what’s the fuckin’ point? Unless you’re trying to kill me—”
“No!” You wanted the ground to swallow you whole, “Does it really look that bad?”
You looked down at the sad, pathetic excuse of a cake. Hard to see all the time, energy and love that went into it when it drooped so pitifully.
“It looks like shit.” He smirked.
“I should’ve just bought one,” You sighed, remembering how pretty all the cakes had been on the online websites you were going to order from before you had the brilliant idea to bake one yourself. Hell, even the cute little cupcakes in the coffee shop you went to each morning looked better than this.
“Nah,” Bakugou shook his head, “It’s perfect.”
It was noon by the time Bakugou had decided to pick the phone up to answer one of his mothers numerous calls to him, eyeing the voicemails that she’d left which no doubt chastised him for not picking the phone up. He’d delete those later.
“Katsuki—” Her voice already had him closing his eyes and rubbing his temple as he settled back in his desk chair. Still better than paperwork— “How hard is it for a mother to wish her son a happy birthday. Don’t you forget that I’m the one who birthed you—”
“Yeah, yeah, Ma. I’m sorry,” He sighed, “Work’s been kickin’ my ass.”
“You shouldn’t be working on your birthday, anyway!” She continued, “Why don’t you take the rest of the day off?”
“I’ve got too much to do.” He didn’t. The paperwork could wait, and he didn’t have a patrol scheduled this week. His sidekicks eager to find their own positions in the hero rankings so they’d picked up all the available slots, leaving Bakugou in his office.
“All you ever do is work anymore, Katsuki.��� She continued, “When are you coming to visit? Your father says he hasn’t heard from you in weeks.”
“I’ll come by soon.” Maybe. He thought.
“You should be spending less time working and more time settling down. You’re not a young man anymore, Katsuki.” Here it comes, “And I want grandchildren while I can still chase after them!”
He scoffed. Even when he was a child Mitsuki still hadn’t been able to catch up with him, but the thought of her running around after his kids had an unfamiliar warmth swirling in his chest.
“It must be lonely, son,” She continued, and for once he stopped to think about it.
“There is someone, Ma—” Bakugou smiled as his eyes looked towards the half eaten cake that sat on the edge of his desk.
If he could ever tell you.
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How do they celebrate your birthday
Ruan Mei
In fact, Ruan Mei is not interested in holidays, at least you were able to convince her to celebrate New Year and even Valentine's Day, and you would not be offended if she did not remember your birthday, since the scientist had many more important things to do, but perhaps you didn’t know, Ruan Mei writes down all the important dates on pieces of paper, which then hang on her workplace (usually important meetings and your dates, since she tends to get lost in research).
And as soon as Ruan Mei sees that your birthday is approaching, she will set aside two days (one to prepare and the other to spend the day with you) in which she will try to forget about work. It was difficult the first time, but the longer you are together, the easier it is for her to put aside her work and put you first, which would have seemed impossible a few years ago.
Ruan Mei often listens to you, although from the outside it may seem that she is ignoring you, and she is very observant, so if your eyes suddenly stop at something, she will write it down and add it to the list of potential gifts.
She also loves to give handmade gifts, such as embroidery and a new plant. And what would we do without homemade cake? Ruan Mei will never buy cake from stores, she will find the best ingredients and put all her strength and care into a sweet miracle.
The first time she decided to surprise you was in the morning. And the sight of Ruan Mei with a damn festive pipe could really scare an unprepared person.
But you'd be lying if you said your heart didn't melt every time you woke up with May sitting on the edge of the bed, holding a piece of cake with a small candle.
You wake up from quiet rustling next to you, and the first thought that comes to mind is that your lover is getting ready for work, which is why you whine pitifully and try to reach her hand without opening your eyes.A soft laugh touches your ears and the space next to you drops a little.
Ruan Mei's hand gently touches your face, tucking unruly strands behind your ear. How she wished at that moment she had her phone with her to take a picture of this amazing sight..
"Wake up, honey."
You reluctantly open your eyes and blink a few times to regain your vision. Your eyes widen as she brings the cake almost to your face.
"What is this?"
You slowly get up from your lying position so as not to hit Ruan Mei.
"Isn't it obvious? Today is your birthday."
Ruan Mei smiles as he sees your shock turn to realization. She passes the fragrant piece into your hands and gets out of bed. You see a mug of freshly brewed tea on the nightstand.
"Take your time, enjoy every bite. We have the whole day ahead of us."
Veritas Ratio
Ratio has long considered any holidays a waste of time, especially birthdays. It seems to me that his parents practically did not celebrate their son’s birthday, calling it a meaningless and ridiculous event, and this attitude was passed on to Ratio. Either way, you caught him off guard when you came to his office to wish him a happy birthday. You were friends back then, and the pure joy on your face when you gave him a gift made something click in his head.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, he would not have been able to cope with his conscience if he had not returned the favor.
As much as Veritas did not want to admit it, over time he began to enjoy this holiday. Especially when it's your holiday. Ratio feels real pride when he sees how you rejoice at everything he has prepared for you, and this is not a little.
Veritas starts planning about two weeks before the birthday. He'll take a day off for the two of you, and even if you say it's not necessary, Ratio will just kiss you and tell you to enjoy the holiday. He's the type who wants everything to be perfect and has a list of places you can visit. Of course, he acts based on your preferences. However, if you want to spend the day at home, then you don’t need to hide it, just say or hint, and Ratio will immediately understand.
Only Ratio knows nothing about gifts. A classic gift would include an encyclopedia, a frying pan and flowers and things like that, but it's very good at serving you. For the whole day, Veritas is ready to fulfill all your wishes, do you want to go shopping? or go see that terrible movie you were talking about? Please, today he will not refuse, but the complaints will not stop, although there will be a little less of them.
Ratio doesn't like store-bought cakes, so he usually makes private orders. His attempts to make the cake himself do not end well. He is not at all friendly with baking, so he always baked only with you, and Veritas sincerely does not understand why your sponge cake is so soft and fluffy, while it is more reminiscent of a cast iron alloy.
And most importantly, this is one of the few days when he doesn’t get up at five o’clock in the morning to play sports and prepare for the new day. Instead, he just lays next to you, lovingly watching you press against his body.
You wake up to Veritas' hand playing with your tangled hair while his other hand is used as a pillow. Your cheek rests on his hard chest, covered by his pajamas, and you bury your nose deeper into his shirt, inhaling his scent.
Veritas’s hand flows from your hair first to the bare skin of your shoulder, after which it draws a path to your palm, which sends a shiver through your body. And in that moment, you were grateful that your nightie didn’t have sleeves.
Neither of you said a word, wanting to enjoy a moment of peace where no one would disturb you, especially your annoying colleagues (he made sure to turn off yours phones).
There were no smart thoughts or reflections in his head, and Ratio liked it, you made him understand that there are other joys in life, and he will definitely show his gratitude.
Ratio kissed the top of your head, inhaling the pleasant aroma of shampoo. You let out a hum of satisfaction and met Veritas' gaze. He watched as you, still sleepy, fought the urge to fall asleep again, but despite this, your lips parted to quietly greet the man.
"Good morning, Veri."
Your lover smiles at the nickname and squeezes your hand tighter.
"Good morning, my dear."
Aventurine
Aventurine hates celebrating his birthday, although he has begun to enjoy it with you, but he is looking forward to the day of your coming into this world with great impatience. In fact, he doesn’t even need notes and reminders, Aventurine never forgets things that are important to him, and the birthday of his beloved angel is not just an “ordinary day” as you try to convince a man when he starts to fuss. You can see him so excited only in very rare cases; Aventurine has to restrain himself so as not to shower you with love and gifts ahead of time.
The blonde, despite his bright and pretentious appearance, is not a big fan of parties, he will prefer to celebrate this day in your company and will be glad if you want this too.
Aventurine doesn't like to waste money on small things, he has enough money to, as he likes to say, buy an entire planet, so spending a couple of million won't affect his wallet. Fortunately, you managed to convince him not to spend money on unnecessary things, to put it mildly. He offered to buy you a chocolate fountain with the most serious face possible, and if Aventurine hadn't been so cute, he would have received more than a light blow to the back of the head. Although he will still try to convince you to go shopping to show you the place with the most beautiful outfits and even underwear.
But he always tries to create a gift with his own hands. Aventurine took knitting lessons because you told him how your friend's girlfriend knitted a scarf for him. He suffered for several weeks, but still knitted some semblance of a scarf (he usually knitted at work, and his employees constantly heard the roar and swearing outside the door). But he was so happy when you started wearing it!
One day he decided to create a statue of you for your birthday with his own hands, and, of course, Ratio was to be his teacher. Ratio had to avoid the impudent player for several weeks, who came to his classes and distracted him with his antics. In the end, they settled on a medium-sized statue, because Aventurine would not have been able to make a large one in a short time (and he also did not want to spend all the clay on a three-meter statue).
Aventurine is frankly bad in cooking, especially in baking. You have to watch his every move, because otherwise there will be nothing left of the kitchen. Therefore, Aventurine usually orders a cake from the best candy chefs in the galaxy, sometimes he chooses something unusual, but first of all, Aventurine chooses what you like.
But this does not mean that Aventurine will not surprise you with breakfast in bed. He'll get up as early as possible, careful not to wake you up or step on any cat creatures, and head to the kitchen. Aventurine loves it when you make breakfast together, but he is also a romantic.
You reluctantly open your eyes, squinting because of the bright rays of sunlight penetrating through the curtains. You wanted to raise your hand, a smile appeared on your face when you saw two cat-like creatures pressed against you, one of them laying on your hand, and it was a hopeless situation.
This cute picture quickly faded into the background when something fell in the kitchen with a terrible crash, making you and the two cats jump in surprise. Only now did you realize that your lover was not in bed.
Afraid that he would hurt himself, you gently threw the cats off your body and ran to the kitchen to find out what was going on.
A very funny picture appeared before your eyes: several pots were lying on the floor, broken eggs and puddles of milk decorated the tabletop and pajamas of Aventurine, who was standing near the stove with a cat in his hands. He laughed awkwardly and tried to cover up the horror that was happening on the table.
“Darling, why did you wake up so early?”
His failed attempt to distract you was met with silence and an incredulous look. After a minute, you pulled yourself together and ran towards him.
"Kakawasha, for the sake of the Eons, what happened here?"
Your hands gently touched his cheek, covered with some kind of dirt. The cat in his arms meowed contentedly and pressed himself against Aventurine, who simply shrugged.
“The blackie one wanted to play, and I couldn’t refuse him.”
You shook your head and gently hit Aventurine's forehead, making him wince in slight pain.
"You're such a troublesome guy."
“Hehe happy birthday, love.”
#hsr x reader#dr ratio x reader#aventurine x reader#honkai star rail x reader#female reader#honkai star rail#dr ratio#ruan mei#dr ratio fluff#aventurine fluff#Ruan Mei fluff#ruan mei x reader
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Prompt: Dare (@into-the-jeggyverse) | Pairing: Jegulus | Word Count: 607
There weren’t many rules involved when playing Truth or Dare, but one of rules Regulus and his friends abided by was that dares involving people not involved in their game had to be completed with in the week. Regulus had been sitting on his dare for a week, and today was the day he would have to complete by dare or face the consequences.
It wasn’t as if the dare was particularly difficult. ‘Kiss James Potter…’ That part was easy considering they were dating and had snogged countless times. It was when Barty added the ‘in front of Sirius’ part that the dare became more difficult to carry out.
Sirius was blissfully unaware his best friend was sneaking around with his little brother. While James was ready to tell Sirius, Regulus was too fearful. Things between the Black brothers weren’t the best. They barely spoke to each other in the last year, although sometimes they held staring contests. Regulus would look at Sirius, catch his eye, and they would just stare until one of them looked away. James told Regulus that Sirius loved him and wanted to talk to him, but Regulus didn’t believe that. No matter how many staring contests they held, it would never replace the look of disappointment and disgust Sirius’ directed at him the night he left.
“Time’s ticking.” Barty reminded Regulus with an amused grin. “You should’ve told pretty boy.”
“I’m aware.” On both accounts. Regulus didn’t tell James of the dare because he was hoping it would somehow go away. But like most of his problems he couldn’t avoid them in hopes that thing would just fade until they no longer existed. “I’m going.”
“You’re doing it now?” his friend snorted, looking around the Great Hall as Regulus got up from the Slytherin table. “I said in front of Black, not the entire school, but by all means. I’ll enjoy the show.” Leave it to Regulus to be overdramatic and cause a scene. The Blacks were famous for it; either do it up big or do nothing at all.
Despite his heart hammering in his chest, Regulus strolled leisurely to the Gryffindor table. He only stopped once he was behind James, reaching out to tap his shoulder. The Marauders fell silent when they noticed Regulus presence, James turning to face him and a slow smile forming on his lips but his eyes showing just how concerned he was. Regulus has never approached him publicly.
“Regulus.” It was Sirius who spoke first, sitting across from James and unbeknownst to him, having the best seat in the house for what was about to come.
Regulus ignored Sirius and the way his stomach dropped and his face heat up in an embarrassing blush. He felt like he was going to throw up and that would not be a very attractive scene.
“Are you alright?” James stood up from where he was sitting, reaching out for Regulus but stopping himself. His arms fell back to his side, fingers curling around nothing.
Somehow Regulus found his voice, his eyes locking with James. “I’m fine, Potter. Better than, I’m spectacular.”
Before James could tell Regulus, he was not, in fact, spectacular, Regulus found a burst of confidence. He reached for James’ tie, wrapping his pale fingers around the red and gold fabric before pulling James in. Their lips met in a chaste kiss but neither pulled away. Once James got over his initial surprise, he laughed happily against Regulus’ mouth causing the younger to relax as he felt James’ hand curl around his hip to pull him in closer as if no one, namely Sirius, was watching.
#jegulus#starchaser#james x regulus#regulus x james#marauders era#microfiction#but not really lol#jeggyverse microfic#james potter#regulus black#everyone really reading for sirius reaction just for it not to be included#is this what we call an open ending#tbh sirius already knows lbr#i wrote this at work instead of working#i also rewrote this twice but details
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heart to heart
ryomen sukuna x f!reader
**part of my best friend's (older brother) fic
previous part linked here
--
sukuna realizes that he’s falling in love with you on the anniversary of his grandfather's death. it’s rather morbid, but he deems that it’s fitting.
the more that he lingered on it, the more he realized it. that family – good and bad – was always going to hum in the background to the two of you. though he supposes that’s just because you grew up together, that somehow you were intertwined in all of each other’s firsts.
first day of school, first basketball game, first funeral.
the day itself isn’t one that sukuna likes to dwell on – a memory colored dark, pushed so hard into the deepest, darkest spots of his mind, that sometimes he only realizes the day has passed a week after the fact. regardless, whenever the realization comes to a head – on time or not – the regret is so suffocating he can barely breathe.
it’s why he makes every effort to avoid you when the day comes to pass. it’s something that he does with everyone – ignore them like he has the plague. but it’s a little bit different when it comes to you. it’s not personal, he muses, but at the same time, it most definitely is.
you’re central to the memory.
sukuna’s sitting up, an idle text being sent to both yuuji and his mom, when the knock on the door comes. and he can feel pressure increase in his throat at the sight of you – his brain feeling heavy, this time in a different way – as you balance two mugs in your hand.
if it was any other day, sukuna would have found it very difficult to contain himself. the messy bedhead, glasses perched on the edge of your nose, and the fact that you’re drowning in one of his dress shirts.
sometimes he wondered if you did it on purpose. tried to rile him up just to see how he would react. though on second thought, he almost knows for a fact that you hardly understood what exactly it was that you did to him. how you made his skin feel like it was on fire.
you sit across from him, setting both of the mugs down on the nightstand, before you press your fingertips to his collarbone and push him back on the headboard to use his body as a pillow. you can hear a scoff before sukuna’s hands tangle around your waist, his fingertips ghosting the waistband of what he recognizes as his boxer briefs.
“you know, part of your whole freeloading in my apartment agreement was that you’d steal my shirts. not my underwear too.”
you poke his chest.
“freeloading? need i remind you, that you basically beg me not to leave each time i’m here. and i’m sorry. i spilled the first batch of hot chocolate i made all over my pajamas and my spares are in the laundry.” you state.
hot chocolate.
sukuna knows for sure that you must be doing that on purpose. and that maybe you watch him as keenly as he watches you, because you catch on to his discomfort just as fast.
“i’m sorry if it’s too much.” you whisper.
you watch his adam’s apple bob in his chest, as he leans his head back against the headboard and shuts his eyes. you trace little stars into his skin, right under the tattooed flesh as you try to talk, as softly as possible.
like he’ll run off if you push too hard.
“sukuna. i-i know that this day can be hard. but we can do whatever you want today.”
“i have work.” he states.
“no, you don’t. satoru told me you took the day off already. that you always take it off. and suguru asked me to take care of you.”
sukuna rolls his eyes. idiots.
“what about yuuji? knowing you two, you’ve probably got some whole orate tradition you do. probably use my headshot as a dartboard.”
“it’s actually your yearbook photo.” you defend.
sukuna smiles.
“megumi and nobara have got him covered. i’m here for you.” you state.
sukuna looks down at you, before quickly looking away. he can’t stand your eyes.
“s’just another day, y/n. if anything, you should get the fuck out of my house. make sure my sensitive brother is fine.”
sukuna watches your eye twitch. he feels bad, but swallows it down.
you lift your hands up to cup the sides of his cheek, lightly rubbing your thumbs under his eyes until they open. his light brown eyes flicker to yours and the message comes off just as he intends it.
don’t.
sukuna should have known you’d be stubborn about it.
“sukuna. s’not really fair if we have a power dynamic.”
“i’m two years older than you. you are well of age.” he deadpans.
“i mean. when i tell you about what’s on my mind – insecurities or-or my fights with yuuji or even mazzy – it’s not just spilling out of me because you’re my boyfriend. like i’m so emotional that i rant about my problems to everyone. it’s actually more natural for me to put it away. and i purposely don’t for you.”
sukuna’s intrigued.
“i’m trying to do this right. like, not withhold things from you because i know that you would hate that. the same way that i would hate it, if that’s what you were going to do with me.” you respond.
you rest your cheek against his collarbone, before bending down to press a kiss into his skin.
“s’not a nice feeling. the conversations we have make me feel like i’m standing naked in front of a classroom on display sometimes. but it’s –” you start.
“that sounds like an ideal situation to me.”
you pinch his bicep.
“i mean. it’s not always easy to feel so bare. but i know it’s the right thing to do. and you kind of have to let me in too. i know it might not seem like that to you, because you fell into the caretaker role so quickly with me, but – i’m usually the one who does that type of thing, with everyone else. and i’m not half bad at it.”
sukuna watched you take care of yuuji his whole life. in the moments that sukuna wasn’t there, he knows that you were the one sitting at his side. especially when he took off so fast like he did.
it’s partly the reason that he was able to do it. because he knew that yuuji would be taken care of – and well, too. but it almost feels wrong, too immature of him to go to you with his problems.
how are you ever supposed to come to him again?
“c’mon, baby. anything you want today. we can go back home and eat at the diner. or go to his grave. stay in the entire weekend…” you hum.
it’s the first time that sukuna’s ever heard you use a term of endearment on him. he was never short of them, a constant cycle of his favorites – pretty girl, doll face, angel. it almost seemed wrong to call you by your name at this point, not when he could so openly express his affections and watch you smile at the fact.
but sukuna likes it more than he wants to. being called baby. he never wants you to say anything else again.
he always thought it was a little stupid, an infantile or immature nickname when he watched satoru call suguru as such. especially the way satoru always seemed to beam whenever he did it. he’ll be sure to swallow his retorts the next time.
“i want to go to the sushi place. back home.” he states.
you scoff.
“oh my god. i went on my first date there. got felt up near that fountain.” you respond, scrunching up your nose.
“i got a handjob near that fountain.” sukuna states.
“ew. don’t tell me you….in the fountain?”
he only grins in response.
“ew, sukuna! you’re such a dog.”
“i’ll have mai bring me a nice dress. we’ll go the whole ten miles on a fancy date, like everyone from high school. if you’re lucky, i might even let you touch my butt.”
“could i be so lucky?” he asks.
you pinch the side of his cheek. his response is pressing a kiss to your knuckles.
“do you have a pink dress?” he asks.
“sure do. i’ll have her bring that one, okay?”
--
sukuna drives you to the sushi restaurant. the ride into town is quiet. you’d almost think that sukuna was mad at you for pushing, but his warm hand resting on your thigh silences almost all the qualms in your head.
when you make it there, the mere fact of being there with sukuna leaves you with an odd thought. that if things were different beforehand, you would have been fifteen standing there with him, instead of leaving the restaurant feeling oddly dissatisfied from a guy who really wanted nothing to do with you instead.
“sukuna. party of two.”
“it’ll just be five minutes.”
sukuna gives a kurt nod before dragging you to the other side to lean against the wall, his hand warm on your waist. you pick your brain at the best thing to say – his uncharacteristic silence brimming you with anxiety and making you particularly hyper-vigilant in choosing the right thing to say to him.
"you're beautiful, you know that?" he whispers.
you fight the urge to smile so hard.
"thank you, sukuna. you're beautiful too."
he glares at you.
"you're shitty."
you smirk, before pinching the side of his cheek. of course that was his reaction.
"you're such a cutie pie little baby sometimes I just wanna-" you coo.
"shut the fuck up before I make you." he responds.
"ooh. so scary!"
“i came here for the first time with my grandpa. i'll even tell you about it if you stop being a little bitch for a second.”
you stop.
“yes, sir. ” you respond, saluting.
sukuna smiles in response and it makes your heart skip a beat. that and the fact that you swear you've never seen his eyes so soft.
“so basically –” sukuna starts
“sukuna, y/n? is that you?”
you look over to your left to find one of your old neighbors – so old that you can barely even remember his name – standing at your sides, excitedly waving at the two of you.
“god, it’s been years! you two are so grown now.”
“mr. soma.” sukuna responds.
you find yourself grinning ear to ear at the fact that one, sukuna’s tone is entirely displeased. and two, that there’s no pleasantry laced in with his words.
“y/n. how is your dad? i haven’t seen him around in a while.”
the taste in your mouth is metallic.
“couldn’t tell you! i haven’t seen him either.” you state.
his face pinches up, the pitiful expression that follows causing a subsequent clenching of your jaw.
“sukuna. how’s your father?”
“still a dick.” he states.
you smile. the way he seems to flinch at the bluntness, at sukuna’s demeanor, is solace enough for the double dose of shitty dad comments. he gives you both a polite smile before skirting off, after an awkward round of small talk. university, work, yuuji and sammy and he's off.
you turn to sukuna, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“you okay?”
“obviously. a dumbass with a shitty attitude won’t ruin my mood when i’m here with you. are you?”
“me too.”
sukuna smirks at you.
“really? you're not internalizing every awkward experience that happens to you? have i entered a parallel universe today?”
“i’m a mystery, idiot. you can spend forever trying to figure me out.”
“planning on it.” he responds.
sukuna splits all his sushi with you. if you like a certain plate, he almost refuses to touch it afterwards, just to let you finish all the pieces. and after you say you’re too full, he’s does the job for you – only because you say that you feel bad leaving it to waste when they took the time to make it.
it’s strawberry ice cream afterwards and he makes it very clear that it's only because it’s your favorite. you swing by the store when you get back into the city and eat straight from the tub on the kitchen island.
and over your shared spoon of dessert, sukuna’s voice is almost so quiet you can barely hear it. you think that the ice cold sensation curbs any warm anxiousness that would stop him normally from talking – and you thank your cravings for it.
“my grandpa was the first person who took care of me.”
you press your cheek to his shoulder in response, rubbing circles into his palm as he talks.
“I know it's a natural thing. that when you have a younger sibling, that it takes the attention away from you. i know logically that i had that attention, that i required it when i was a baby too.”
"but?"
"but yuuji's so fucking likeable. i love the idiot and it feels like shit to admit, but i fucking hated that everyone almost forgot about me just because of him."
you pause.
“it’s hard not to like you too.” you state.
“but you know what i mean. i liked taking care of him, until i didn't. he got older and...and sometimes it felt like he didn't even fucking care about half the things i did for him. at one point, i got sick of watching everyone fawn over him so much that it made me upset. i told my mom but...you know how she can be. didn't really register for her. ”
you hum in response.
“my grandpa must have noticed that i had a little bit of resentment towards him, especially when i was in eighth grade. started getting in fights and acting out and all that. and he brought me here. and-and i was pissed at him that i just started fucking yelling at him. about how he didn’t care about me and how i felt unwanted and under-appreciated and…and he agreed with me.”
he pauses, bringing one of his hands up to your hair.
“i like feeling appreciated. valued enough that someone will listen to me and actually believe it. that he wanted to be around me too.” he states.
you pause, your heart clenching so hard in your chest. your stomach nearly drops at the sentiment, at the memory that you can feel tears in your eyes. you’re murderous hatred for sukuna and yuuji’s dad only grows tenfold with every consecutive day – but feels particularly potent now.
you immediately tilt your head up, in efforts to curb yourself from crying – when you’re the one who should be strong for him right now. he, of course, notices right away.
“eh? what’s wrong with you?”
“allergies.”
“did you miraculously get stung by a bee in the past few seconds while we were sitting here?”
you scoff.
“you’re so obsessed with me. you even memorized my medical history!”
“that was in no way romantic. god forbid i know a basic fact about you so you don’t like, literally die on me. now tell me what it is. you basically have to because my grandpa is dead, you know?”
“are you really playing the dead grandpa card?”
“the fact that you called it that was fucking offensive. now you have to tell me.”
you roll your eyes.
“i was just thinking about that day. it makes my heart break that you lost someone who made you feel understood. that you felt alone, even though we were all right there. i hope you know that i find it hard to drag myself away from you sometimes. you're like the only place i want to be." you murmur.
the year before sukuna left, he got into fights often. you remember it vividly – the fact that his mom always seemed to be at your house crying to your mom, while you and yuuji lingered by the doorway for too long listening when you shouldn’t have.
and he’d shuffle in hours later, a purple eye or bloodied knuckles – a wall of silence with zero explanation.
but the worst part is that the one time he got in serious trouble, enough to constitute needing to be picked up from the police station, was cosmically the worst possible day it could have happened.
because sukuna’s grandfather was already dead when you guys got the call. you had all been phoning him for hours and unbeknownst to you, the reason he didn’t pick up is because his phone had gotten taken away. and his mom, yuuji – they were so struck in their own grief that your mom had taken you and sammy with her to go get him.
and now when you think of it – the thought of him sitting there all alone when you found him, the fact that he was sitting there feeling misunderstood made you cry. it was enough to know that you had all unleashed horrible news on him, but even worse to know you were the one to rip his grandfather away from his life.
“i remember that you were the one who told me.” he states.
you nod, affirming his memory.
“you…you were all quiet. was kind of expecting your mom to give me an earful, about being responsible for my mom and yuuji. but she was just quiet. sammy didn’t even look at me. and when i saw you, you were crying. came up right by my side and apologized. you were the first person to give me condolences. made me hot chocolate when you got home because you didn’t know what else to do.” he states.
“yeah. i wish i was more composed or…or could have at least said something better to you. and i still kind of suck with words but i…i hope this helps? at least a little?” you mumble.
sukuna leans forward, curbing any follow-up sentiment you could have had with his lips. you can still taste the strawberry. you murmur against his lips – him pulling you back in every time you try to pull away.
“did you kiss me to shut me up?” you ask.
“do you want a cookie for figuring that one out, genius?” he responds.
you lightly push his chest.
“you’re such a dickhead! let me do the whole supportive, caring girlfriend thing. i can’t just leave you hanging, you know.”
sukuna rolls his eyes.
“doll face.” he deadpans.
you glare at him.
“you are perfect.”
you’re caught off guard.
“i’ve never told anyone any of that before. never even met someone i’ve wanted to tell. quit fucking worrying yourself over whether or not it was good or bad. i’m half convinced that you could be my remedy to anything.”
you can feel the heat rushing to your cheeks at the praise. you bundle the fabric of his collar in your shirt before you pull him forward, pressing your lips to his as softly as you can.
“someone feeling bold today?” he murmurs against your lips.
his hand is warm on your face, cupping the side of your cheek. and when you lean forward, the warmth that surges through you is so deep that you think you might have kissed sukuna too hard. because now you’ve backed him up against the wall, your fingers quickly rushing down the buttons of his shirt.
sukuna’s quick to stop you. hands warm on your wrists and brown eyes widened.
“what are you doing?” he whispers.
“oh. oh, i don’t know. it…it just kinda came over me. sorry. just like..felt super close to you there for a second and i felt it like…rumbling in my chest.”
sukuna’s brings his forehead against yours. his eyes are pinched shut, almost straining, his breaths quiet.
“i want to do something. but you have to tell me if it’s going to make you feel uncomfortable.” you ask.
“okay.” sukuna responds.
“don���t even think about fucking lying to me. i’ll know.”
"yeah right."
“i mean it.” you grates.
“just tell me.” he responds.
“okay, but-”
“y/n l/n.”
you pause.
“can you take a bath with me?”
he pulls back.
“what?”
“a bath. suguru gifted us these bath salt and stuff. he said it was a gift for you. told me you like that kind of thing.”
“he's always gifting some weird therapy shit to me.” he states.
"therapeutic." you correct.
“one day i’m going to curb your fucking attitude and you’re not going to like it one bit.”
you smile.
“i hate you. i’ll take my bath on my own then.” you respond.
he yanks hard on his arm.
“okay. if it's uncomfortable, we get out.”
you nod. you get in first, quickly leaing against the wall and hiding under the warm bubbles, as he follows suit. weirdly enough, sukuna's first instinct is to go to the other side, the farthest from you, but you stop by pulling on his wrist.
"c'mhere. just lean against me." you murmur.
it’s a little bit awkward at first. because sukuna's the one wound up instead of you.
“can you relax for me?” you whisper.
“right. sorry.”
he leans back, your skin prickling, as he settles his head against your chest. he's looking up at you, his eyes fixed on yours, but you can’t help but stare at his skin - freckles and moles that you’ve never had the opportunity to notice sparkling his skin.
“thank you.” he whispers.
“for?”
he scoffs.
“y/n.” he chides.
“use your big boy words!” you coo.
“shut the fuck up.”
“c’mon. you've got it in you.”
“you know what i want to say.”
“of course i do. i know you’re really glad that i have an innie belly button instead of an outie.”
sukuna nearly chokes on his spit.
“i beg your pardon?”
“i know that outies freak you out. you don’t have to say it.”
sukuna stops himself from saying it.
that he's falling in love with you.
it’s right on the tip of his tongue. but he knows that it’s too fast so he swallows it down. that and the fact that it would be fucking insane if he said that to follow up your stupid joke about inne and outie belly buttons.
“baby, we should really donate your brain to science. i think you could advance neuroscience fifty years into the future.” sukuna states.
“take that back, asshole.” you respond.
“make me.”
you yank hard on his hair, before fixing your hands back in his locks and pushing the matted wet hair off of his forehead. sukuna leaves a kiss in your hands, before he seems to wander off somewhere else, almost like he's deep in thought.
you grant him the quietness. sukuna loves you even more for it.
--
next part linked here
an: ICK CHAPTER BUT WHATEVER
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#seeingivywrites!#bsfs older brother sukuna!#sukuna#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna x y/n#sukuna fluff#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna fluff#sukuna ryomen#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryomen x you#sukuna ryomen x y/n#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk fluff
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cold kisses
part 0.16. "LET ME HOLD ONTO YOU, PLEASE"
PLAYING FROM KODZUKEN'S STREAM . . . count contessa by azealia banks & lone
he’s barely seen her in the past few days. he’s not complaining. in fact, he’s being rather dramatic putting it like that. she’s been coming home every day around 10 at night, trying to muffle the loud sighs she’ll let out as she closes the door behind her. she’ll shuffle around, clean herself up, and then always ends up falling onto his bed, where he’s already lying, switch in hands.
“you should come up here,” he always says, because half of her body is currently hanging off the very end of the mattress.
she’ll then whine at him, saying something about how much effort it is to move another inch so he’ll put down his switch and help her clamber up to lay next to him. while she’s tucked in under his comforter, he’s slouched against the wall behind him, not quite lying down nor sitting up. she wants to be close to him and that’s not a problem; he’ll put an arm around her, resting it on her shoulder so that she’s hugged close while he can keep playing his switch. or, he’ll decide it’s time to sleep as well and run a hand through her hair until they’ve both fallen asleep.
however, that all happens in around two hours at the very end of the day, and other than that, he doesn’t get to see her. he’s gotten used to her convoluted directions (“take a left, then a right, then another right, oh and that right is actually down a pretty long hallway, keep going straight, take a left, then you’ll see a really narrow hallway, it looks a little sketchy but go through it…”) leading him around buildings and past security so that he can visit her in the middle of the day while other events are going on but it’s never for long.
the point is, he misses her. a lot. but today is her day. yesterday was the short program, they’d ended in second place. she’d come home that day with anxiety eating away at her. she'd closed the door softly behind her, wandered down the hall, seen him, and then immediately started shaking. they had sat on the couch for at least an hour, him holding her hands tightly, telling her to focus on the pressure he was pressing into them and breathing with her. it was all sobs and cracked whispers of how worried she was of disappointing people, how worried she was about the twist.
he couldn’t pretend he knew how difficult the twist was, or that he knew what to say. he knew not to say it would be alright. he knew it was their most difficult move; she always came home with a bright smile on her face whenever practicing the move had gone well. and then two days ago it hadn’t. atsumu had dropped her and it hadn’t been a big confidence booster for either of them. getting second place was only more of a detriment. he didn’t say anything about it, because he knew that wasn’t what she wanted. he didn’t know enough to say anything about their twist, but he knew what second place felt like.
he knew from volleyball tournaments how much it hurt to almost be there. to win game after game, ignoring thoughts of failure no matter how anxious or humble a person might be, because they needed to focus on moving forward. he knew what it was like to be on a team, to worry about holding others back, and he knew what it felt like to stand there on a silent stage after performing a sport in front of thousands of people and be almost good enough, but not good enough.
that night he had wiped away her tears and kissed her, saying, “focus on tomorrow, not what others will think, not what’s already happened. it doesn't matter what other people think, and you can only control yourself. tomorrow will be great. you and miya will be great, and i’ll be there for you no matter what happens.”
she’d given him the biggest pout ever at his words, looking up at him with glassy eyes, “can i have that good luck kiss now, then?”
“anything you want,” he’d responded, kissing her and muffling her huff of laughter.
“you can’t ask me to kiss you and then laugh in my face,” he had said when he pulled away, staying close enough that their noses bumped into each other.
she’d continued laughing before trying to answer him, “i’m sorry, i’m not laughing at you." she stopped when he wiped away a stray tear that had escaped her eyes, "i was just thinking about how crazy it must have been for me to come home and then immediately start hyperventilating and ranting to you and then turn around and ask for a kiss.”
“i told you not to worry about things like that, i’ll love you no matter what. i've just been worried. nothing else,” he sighed, resting his forehead against hers.
her hands reached up to run through his hair, holding the sides of his head, “i love you, kenma. thank you for listening. i'll need another kiss tomorrow if I'm gonna do this.”
“i’ll give you as many as you want,” he’d replied.
now he was standing right by the edge of the ice rink. y/n and ukai had both pulled strings and forced him into a seat up close to the rink, right next to her coach. he wasn’t sure how to feel, sitting there feeling like an uneducated commoner amongst famous people who actually knew the name of every trick going on, but he stayed there for her. when she came out onto the ice, her eyes scanned the crowd, immediately finding him and blowing a kiss towards him.
he smiled back, eyes flicking up to the screen hanging above in the middle of the rink, displaying atsumu and her skating towards the center of the rink, hand in hand. the applause that erupted at their entrance only served to make his heart beat faster. he’d given her an entire speech about remaining calm yesterday and today, but he felt like he was about to throw up. he’d witnessed a skating pair fall just before their performance and he and ukai had both simultaneously sat down, hands in their heads and eyes burning like they were on the verge of tears.
he tried to clap along with the crowd, trying not to overthink how big of a crowd was forming in this stadium. he knew atsumu and y/n had been popular, but not even the cold mist from the ice rink could help him regulate his temperature or panic.
and if he felt this way, he couldn’t imagine how she felt. she and atsumu were both in each other arms, and he could see the way both of their shoulders rose before falling together, trying to calm each other down. he had been better about overthinking them being so close to each other now. atsumu seemed to respect her boundaries more than before and kenma knew that at the end of the day, he’d be the one kissing her, not him.
the blood pounding in his ears was so loud he barely realized they were starting. their song had grown familiar to him, and it helped him feel the slightest bit calmer. the pair started apart, spinning in time with one another, before coming back together and skating backwards, picking up speed as they glided past him and then across the center of the rink.
he held his breath watching their first real move, watching her position herself in front of atsumu, his hands on her waist before he lifted her and threw her forwards. he heard ukai let out a breath with him as she landed.
ukai had drilled many terms into his head, and they came to mind without him having to think about it. they skated past him again, grabbing each others hands and facing each other before y/n arched farther and farther down. that was a death spiral, he could remember that one easily. the name and actual position had fascinated him, and he watched closely, hands pulling at the fabric of his pants.
“fuck,” ukai cursed as they slowly stood back up, atsumu pushing her out with their hands bridged above.
kenma immediately threw a look his way, he hadn’t noticed anything wrong. “what happened?” he asked, his breath feeling short again.
“they just–they got up too fast,” ukai pinched the bridge of his nose, “it won’t affect them much, but i know they’re both thinking of it and–” he covered his face with his hands, knees bouncing.
“oh, the twist is soon,” kenma finished for him, looking forward again.
“kenma,” ukai’s voice immediately made him look back again, frowning in confusion.
“let me hold onto you for this, please, i might have a heart attack if this goes wrong,” ukai was looking at him with the widest bloodshot eyes he’d ever seen, rivaling how bad he could look after a few consecutive nights without sleep, and kenma couldn’t even blame him.
“oh, yeah. go for it. whatever you need,” he answered as nonchalantly as he could, unsure of what to do but offer himself to the older man.
there were two hands on his shoulders, holding him firmly as they both watched, frozen in place as they watched the two skaters.
there atsumu’s hands went on her again, her own hands moving to hold onto his wrists as he lifted her up.
ukai was murmuring a prayer of pleas and “oh my god”s next to him and kenma joined him in his head.
his eyes were burning from how long he’d kept them open, not wanting to blink for even a fraction of a second. watching y/n perform on the ice in front of millions of people total, in person and through screens, only added to all the emotions he felt. if it wasn't from how dry his eyes were, he could probably start crying from how he felt. he was so proud of her. no matter what she won today, she was perfect in his head.
when atsumu caught her again flawlessly, slowly letting her back down as they circled the rink, facing each other. he felt the goosebumps run across his skin as the entire crowd roared.
ukai and him had both stood up screaming, and ukai was shaking him violently as kenma ended up grabbing back onto him.
they were both panting as they tried to calm back down and the rest of the performance seemed a blur trying to remember it. in the moment, he had been completely present. he knew he had screamed a lot–at almost every movement they did after that twist; adrenaline had completely taken over any rationalization in his head. when atsumu and y/n ended back in the middle of the rink, they were clutching each other, both shaking with sobs.
ukai next to him had a few tears rolling down his face and he was sure he did, too.
the second after their song ended was silent before the stadium was filled with applause once more. groups of spectators stood up one by one before everyone was on their feet. the skaters took their turns bowing before bowing together, twirling each other around a few times.
then he realized he hadn’t even looked up at their scoring and she almost fell to her knees, too, before her partner caught her, realizing what they had won.
“hey,” atsumu’s giving her a wide grin when she steps out of the locker room, “you did great.”
she returns his smile, relaxing her shoulders at his words, “you did too! i felt so relieved after that twist, but ukai’s definitely chewing us out for that spiral later.”
“oh definitely, i could already hear him in my head the moment i realized we stood up too fast,” he uncrosses his arm as he steps away from the wall he’s been leaning on. “so,” he begins, tilting his head slightly down to look at her as he comes to his full height.
“so?” by herself in the locker room, she was fully ready to break his heart if he asked about partnering again next year, but being alone with him in person made some of that confidence die down.
“you’re choosing him over me?” she’s already opening her mouth to respond before she freezes, processing what he really asked.
“what? what are you talking about?” she looks at him, trying to read his face.
“i just thought…maybe you’d say something. especially after that performance, you’d pick me over him,” he’s holding her gaze, revealing nothing in his eyes about what he’s feeling.
“kenma? you thought i was going to break up with him for you?” she backs up a little, trying to put distance between them.
but he follows after her, maintaining the proximity, “yeah. i mean, especially after that fight you guys had. you’re really gonna stay with a guy who hides behind a screen all day? and makes you feel shitty for just hanging around another guy he barely knows?–"
"what? how did you even know about that?” she cuts him off.
“because i knew what i was doing, obviously, taking you out somewhere like that,” he retorts, cornering her into a wall.
“he got upset because he knew you were trying to play him. you’re the one that doesn’t know him. he doesn’t hide behind a screen, and i’m sorry if i gave you the wrong impression. i thought that you were actually trying to be a good person,” she holds her ground, eyes darting ever so often to the hallway to her left, hoping someone might appear.
she sees his fists clench and then relax, “i….i was trying. i am a good person. i tried to be patient and nice, and i backed off because i care about you. i thought i could win you over and show you how good i am. and we’re perfect for each other. the whole world thinks so. did you see the crowd we had? the way they all stood up at the end? kenma’s just someone who manipulates money out of others, but look at us, we bring actual enjoyment to other people.”
that's the last thing he says before she loses her control. his head has been sharply turned to the side and his skin quickly turns red from the hand she slaps across it, and she doesn’t feel bad about it. “don’t you dare fucking talk about him like that. i keep fucking telling you that you don’t know who he is. he’s not a manipulator like you, i mean, seriously. can you step down from your self-appointed podium for one second and listen to the words coming out of your own mouth? you just told me you tried to manipulate me into breaking up with my boyfriend to date you after you tried to make him jealous. you’re full of bullshit, miya. what he does is just as honest and good as what we do. and i’m never working with you again. i don’t give a fuck if you’re little team can prevent me from ever going to the olympics again. do whatever makes you feel better about how pathetic you are. it doesn't matter to me."
she shoves off the arm he had pressed to the wall next to her, walking away. she turns the corner sharply, trying to put as much distance between her and atsumu.
she lets out a breath immediately, feeling a weight lift off her chest before she runs into someone. “oh, sorry–" her voice dies out when she realizes who it is, exclaiming as she pulls him into a hug.
kenma hugs her back for a second before unwinding her arms from him, “y/n," he's holdings her wrists in his hands, eyes scanning her face for anything wrong, "you didn’t answer any of my texts, is everything okay?” she can’t help the smile that breaks across her face before she wriggles her hands out of his, grabbing hold of his face to pull him in for a kiss.
he freezes before kissing her back, holding her closer with a hand pressed against the back of her head but she can feel how stiff he still is with worry.
when they break apart she sighs, resting her head on his shoulder, turning to face his neck and place a kiss on it. “i’m great, kenma. don’t worry,” his hands move to wrap around her waist, pulling her in closer when he’s sure she’s okay. “i just slapped atsumu across the face and gave him an entire speech about how much i love you to his face, you just missed it.”
“damn,” she feels his chest expand as he takes in a deep breath before sighing. “now i wish i hadn't waited so long. i had my phone ready and everything, i was pretty sure i was gonna turn the corner and see you beating his ass.”
"i wish you came sooner too,” she nuzzles her nose against his shoulder before pulling back to look at him face to face, “i would've treasured that video forever, but it's okay. i also may have just ended my career, but we’ll find out about that later.”
he freezes again in surprise at her last comment but she continues, “if it is, we'll find a way, but i think it’ll be fine. maybe atsumu will finally learn his lesson.”
he’s silent for a moment before he decides what to say, “if you say so.”
she can’t help the laugh that spills out of her mouth at his response before it goes quiet, the both of them still looking into each others eyes.
“you know i’m going to ask you what happened later, right?” he gives her a small, teasing smile.
“i do. and i’ll tell you, but right now i’m just focused on you,” she answers with a shrug, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“wanna know something else?” he asks.
“what is it?” she tilts her head.
“your lips are still cold from the ice rink.”
“are they now?”
“ i could never forget the feeling. but maybe you should let me kiss you one more time. just to make sure.”
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extras <3
COUNT CONTESSA!!! if you were not apart of my two day freakout over what song atsumu and y/n would actually perform to it was what won the poll i made which is all thanks to the music mastermind @eggyrocks
THANK YOU SO MUCH TO @kitnootkat FOR BEING MY PERSON TO GO TO WITH ICE SKATING QUESTIONS THIS CHAPTER WOULD NOT BE POSSIBLE W/O YOU and also my 50 wikipedia tabs that have been opened over the course of writing this chapter
also the u.s. figure skating account i fr just copied whatever posts they had
thank u nathan chen for all the work u put in just for a random haikyuu fanfic author to plaster oikawa tooru's name over today (HE'S REALLY GOOD AND HIS PERFORMANCE GAVE ME GOOSEBUMPS I MEAN NO DISRESPECT)
i also had no idea the quad axel was like the hardest move ever i FR JUST COPIED THAT FROM A U.S. FIGURE SKATING POST AND THEN FOUND THAT OUT LATER ON GOOGLE SO I PROMISE I DID NOT JUST PULL A WATTPAD AND BE LIKE "oh what is the hardest thing someone could ever do teehee and let me have my mary sue character do it with no flaws whatsoever"
EPILOGUE IS NEXT!!!
i feel like the quality of the written portions really went 📈📈📉📉📉📈📉📉📉📉📉📈📉 i am sorry
also i still had no idea what i'm writing and i am so sorry to any ice skater offended by what they just read and i hope skipped over my horrible descriptions and lack of knowledge writing
that's why this chapter took so long because i was so confused trying to understand the scoring system and what it looks like to the audience and skaters but i really really tried i promise
ukai and kenma were basically holding onto each other the entire time screaming and shaking the other person at every move atsumu and y/n did
ukai is a very proud father and 100% approves of kenma
when y/n wouldn't respond to kenma's texts bc she was busy bitch slapping atsumu kenma was like "i'm going to go find y/n"
ukai did not bat an eye he just pointed in some direction and was like "yeah go that way and turn right. go get your girlfriend. and go get married or something. if security tries to stop you tell them ukai sent you"
that sounds so ominous LMAOOO
in the suna-iwa dorm they were planning to have a civilized, peaceful night watching the olympics together as they cheered on y/n but then got a knock on their door
oikawa got to go and see y/n's performance in person but the rest of them just came over to the suna-iwa dorm to watch y/n together
it would be silent besides the tv in the dorm and then hinata and noya would lead one of those wii golf reactions to everything going on
they'd see yn position herself in front of atsumu before he would lift her so they'd be like "ohhhh" and then he'd throw her and they'd cheer
hinata would also sometimes just death grip kageyama's wrist (holding a paper bag) because he thought he was literally about throw up
atsumu definitely just stood facing the wall where y/n had just been for at least a good 10 minutes in silence before walking down a hallway he had never been down to think about his life choices
then proceeded to call y/n a bitch when a news reporter found him
honestly that did not go well for him
kenma and atsumu x yn fans were not very happy with him
i'm going to stop yapping now
i hope u enjoyed this chapter!! thank u for reading cold kisses <3
taglist: @rinheartshyunlix @kettlepop @cr4yolaas @httpakkeiji @keioover @does-directions @calx-bdo @staygoldsquatchling02 @cherrypieyourface @iluv-ace @kitty-m30w @h3xi2g0n3 @mylahrins @thechaosoflonging @momoriii-i @localgaytrainwreck @a-pastel-edgelord @bugglesboop @polish-cereal @osakis-gf @phoenix-eclipses @faesix @ryeyeyer @skylarkalchemist @kunimix @sereniteav @kodzubaby @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @r0seandth0rns @gsyche @seillarium @tamimemo @myromanempiree @coldcigarette @eclipticnikki @squiishymeow @vivian-555 @cryptictheseus @eclecticeggknightpsychic @kodzukein @kawaii-angelanne @luvly-writer @kodzuken-hoe @kodzuken88 @bookworm-center @theweirdfloatything @glitch-karma @spicana
#kozume kenma#kenma kozume#kenma#kenma x reader#kenma smau#kenma x reader smau#haiykuu smau#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#hq#hq x reader
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Tough Love, Oops, I meant Tough *Hate
(There’s nothing comforting or kind for you to read in this post, and i’m going to be very harsh, if you can’t handle that, then don’t read.)
Hey Pathetic Upper East Sider.
Here are some fun facts about you! ->
- You’re the reason you don’t have what you want. You blame your circumstances…when in reality it’s actually all your fault and only your fault.
You’re pathetic.
- You aren’t persisting because you’re too lazy to pick a new story and fulfill yourself with it. Talk about self harm, but mentally.
Pathetic
- You’re going to continue to stay miserable because you find comfort in it.
Pathetic
- Ignore all the bloggers that tell you that you can manifest anything you want. Plot twist. You can’t. Because you won’t persist.
Pathetic
- You clearly don’t love yourself. At least not enough.
Pathetic
- You have no aura. Infact, you are an insult to aura itself. Aura runs from you. At full speed.
Pathetic
- You can’t even do something that requires not even moving a muscle.
Pathetic
- The audacity. Of you. Burning in hell. When you’re not even dead yet.
Pathetic
- The devil himself would be kinder to you, than you are to yourself.
Pathetic
- I always wondered how much self hate it took to destroy your own life, but looking at you…now I know.
Pathetic
- You’re not even living, you’re surviving.
Pathetic
- When your life goes downhill, how does it feel knowing even you wouldn’t have the will to save yourself..?
Pathetic
- No one will be there for you, because nobody understands that you have the power to change your own life. They’d never understand. No one is here for you. No one understands you. No one.
Pathetic
- Way harsh but suicide doesn’t seem any worse from this.
Pathetic
- You’re the reason you’re going to end up crying tomorrow. You’re the reason your pillow is drenched at night. You’re the reason.
Pathetic
- You’re never going to be happy. And it’s all your fault.
Pathetic
- You’re the villain that the audience actually wants to get rid of.
Pathetic
- No one on this app cares about you.
Pathetic
(Do I sound harsh enough yet? Well maybe because you let the truth be harsh).
- Again, it’s all your fault.
Pathetic
- People younger than you are out there living their dream lives.
Pathetic
- Let go of all that hope for the future. The future’s got nothing for you apart from eternal misery. I would say you have nothing but misery is far from nothing.
Pathetic
- Delete your vision boards, they’ll never be your reality. Now they’ll only make you miserable. What sane person stares at things they know they can never have?
Pathetic
- If you really had it in you, you would’ve done it by now. Or at least tried.
Pathetic
- The fact that you think this is all difficult.
Pathetic
- The audacity you have to feel bad for yourself. Don’t cry at the fact that your life is miserable. Cry at the fact that it’s all your fault.
Pathetic
- You’re powerless. With power comes persistence. And you’ll do anything but persist.
Pathetic
- You’re not going to persist today, you’re not going to persist tomorrow, you’re not going to persist next week..
Pathetic
- Tomorrow you’re going to wake up, with nothing you want. And your lack of care for yourself is the reason why you’re going to live like that forever. Enjoy your 9-5. If you can even get one..
Pathetic
- The fact that you think i’m kidding.
Pathetic
- The fact that right now you’re telling yourself “maybe i should persist” when you told yourself that months ago…and here you are. Same old same old…
Pathetic
- It’ll reach 2026 and you still won’t have anything you want.
Pathetic
- Remember all that excitement you felt reading those success stories?…funny how it’ll never be you…
Pathetic
- The fact that the only reason you probably saw this is because of the #loasuccess tag, when you can’t even relate..
Pathetic
- You’re never going to have what you want. You gave up ages ago when you decided to not persist. I think it’s time you truly accept it. You’re never going to have what you want. Read that again.
Pathetic
- You don’t have tomorrow to redeem yourself because you’re never going to stay consistent with yourself and persist. You’ve already tried that before.
Pathetic
- You’re hopeless.
Pathetic
- The fact that all this is to you, is just words on a screen, and not your actual reality.
Pathetic
- And the worst of them all…you’re going to read this, feel bad, and just keep scrolling. As usual.
Pathetic.
Happy miserable scrolling, as your miserable little finger scrolls from this post, and your miserable little eyes skim the words of the next, as your miserable little child self watches you crush their dreams, and take away everything. everything. everything.
You are actually just…pathetic. It’s pitiful. I know.
P.S. Did I forget to mention? You’re pathetic.
- gossip girl
#void state#void#law of assumption#loa tumblr#loassumption#loa blog#loablr#manifestation#loa#the void state#law of assumption blog#neville goddard#loa success#law of manifestation#edward art#nevile goddard#living in the end#live in the end#loassblog#void state tips#loa manifestation#loa advice#loa manifesting#loa tips#loa success story#loasuccess#loass#affirm and manifest 🫧 🎀✨ ִִֶָ ٠˟#i am state#appearance change
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❝state of grace.❞ || tom blyth x f!reader
| request- state of grace by taylor!!!!
| A/N- i’m using every goddamn line of this song in it. it’s too good to be ignored. justice for state of grace it’s my fav on red 😞😞
| WARNINGS- strange men in cafes, wine, monopoly, mentions of murdering josh, mentions of robbery, two goofballs in love, and big ol’ smooches
(divider by @v6que)
i’m walking fast through the traffic lights, busy streets and busy lives.
you’ve scrambled out of your apartment and are speed walking throughout the brooklyn streets in hopes of getting to your audition on time. being an aspiring actress in new york isn’t easy, but it’s all you wanted to do. nothing else called to you like acting, but the constant state of franticness and stress was taking a toll.
your mind begins to wander around the fact that the thousands of people you see tonight have their own lives, they’re trying to get home to their families, or their significant other, they have something to go home to.
all we know is touch and go.
after the disaster that one could call your audition, you figured you deserved a coffee. the cozy and serene café was one you frequented, on the days you had time. the chipper and almost too happy barista starts your drink the second she sees you cross the threshold of the doors. you go to take your usual seat by the window but stop upon seeing a man sitting there.
you stop and stare before ultimately deciding to just take the seat next to his, no, your usual seat. being too tired to even try to muster up the emotional strength to be upset, you plop down and place your head on the table. “you look like you really need this today.” jessie, the barista, says and places the mug of coffee next your head. you offer a small thanks and stare into the dark liquid.
we are alone with our changing minds, we fall in love till’ it hurts or bleeds.
the man occupying your space turned to look at you and he looked completely contrary to you, bright blue eyes, a smile, and he just looked content. he’s definitely attractive, but your brain couldn’t find any room for this man to move into.
“rough day, eh?” his accent makes you tilt your head towards him, he is really cute, you can’t lie. you nod your head tiredly and sip on your coffee. he stand up and takes the seat across from you and stick his hand out. “i’m tom, and you look like you could use a friend right now.” you shake his hand with a small smile and place the mug back down. “well, tom, how are you so good at reading people?” you pipe up after telling him your own name.
“it’s a talent i posses, love. can’t help it. i’m an empath.” his answer makes you laugh harder than you have in months. maybe this day wasn’t so bad after all. “there we go! you laughed, that was my whole goal. reckoned it would’ve taken longer, but i did it.” tom patted himself on the back as you shook your head with a small smile. “a woman of very few words, i see?”
you hum “i don’t know what to say to you, tom. a strange man approaches me in a cafe after i’ve had a bad day, what do i say to that?” he puts a finger on his chin to over exaggerate his thinking. “you could tell me about yourself, or i could tell you about myself. you just look lonely.” his eyes widen as he realizes he just called you lonely. he wasn’t wrong, but still hurt your feelings nonetheless.
“okay, i’m from california. everyone i know still lives there so it’s a little difficult to not be lonely here, but you don’t seem to be very not lonely. you’re sitting in a cafe by yourself and talking to strangers.” he throws his head back laughing. yeah, he’s really cute.
you come around and the armor folds, pierce the room like a cannonball.
after consistently hanging out with tom for a few months you’ve gotten into a routine. text tom good morning, tell him what you’re doing that day, and that you hope he has a good day. through him you’ve met some great friends, but you and rachel stuck together like glue instantly.
“so you’ve known tom for like seven months, and he still hasn’t come over to your apartment?” rachel asks in between sips of wine. you both sit on toms couch as the others are in the kitchen mixing drinks. “yes! i don’t know why i’m so nervous about it, it just feels too intimate for him to see it.” you and rachel giggle into eachother. it might be the wine, but you’ve never felt happier.
tom comes running into the living room, obviously drunk. “try this, i’ve perfected my concoction.” he shoves a foul smelling drink into your face. you look up at him and smile, “tom, this smells terrible. what the hell is in this?” he smells it himself and shrugs. “about a pour of everything.” you turn to rachel as if pleading for her to help. “i think i heard josh say he needs your help in the kitchen.” tom pipes up and struts back to the kitchen.
“someone needs to cut him off, he’s gonna be so sick tomorrow.” you manage to squeeze out in between your laughs. rachel wiggles her eyebrows at you “and you’ll be the one taking care of him.” you turn your head away from her with a pained expression. “i’m going to the kitchen to see what the hell they’re doing.”
so you were never a saint, and i loved in shades of wrong.
you lay flat on toms floor while he sits next to you, you’re talking about how you were as teenagers and before you met eachother. “no i was literally evil, i would ghost any girl that liked me.” toms cheeks are blushed from all the laughing. “i was the same way! i just never loved anyone right, and i was just really mean.” tom brushes a stray piece of hair out of your face that was stuck on your eyelashes. you stare up and him and swallow, you jet up to your feet. “i’m hungry, let’s go grab something.”
this is a state of grace, this is the worthwhile fight. love is a ruthless game.
josh, rachel, tom and you sit circled around your coffee table. monopoly laying on the table and wine in all of your hands. “that’s not fair! i’m in jail and josh gets to buy my properties?” you yell out as josh wheezes next to you. your eyes meet toms and you glance down at his wine stained lips. “you’re the bank, tom! tell him no and that i’m still a citizen!” “afraid you’ve dug your own grave, love. robbery does land you in jail.” he knowingly points his finger at you. “who said i committed robbery?! this is a corrupt world.”
rachel decided it might be best to put the game away before you actually do end up in jail for killing josh. the four of you sit on the couch watching some marvel movie. you turn your head to tom and whisper “so how did i commit robbery? what did i steal?” obviously still stuck on how you never won the game. he smirked down at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “my heart, love.” you pull away from him and pretend to gag onto rachel, who is sound asleep.
this is the golden age of something good and right and real. and i never saw you coming.
you wake up blearily and sit up. then a wall of pain shoots into your head as you look to your surroundings. tom is in your bed next to you. oh my god. tom is in your bed. he groans and grabs his head “what time is it? and how much wine did we drink?” he asks, acting like this is just a normal situation. “i have no idea where my phone is and apparently a lot because i feel like i got hit by a train.” you croak out laying back down.
toms arm finds its home around your waist and he cuddles into your back. “let’s just go back to sleep.” you nod and try to push down the sheer panic rising throughout your form. when you awake a few hours later, tom is gone. almost disappointed you walk out into your living room and find rachel and josh sitting there looking quite grumpy. “are you guys oka-” josh shushes you and goes back to rubbing his temples. you mutter a small sorry and walk into your kitchen, seeing tom making coffee. his bed head and sleep ridden eyes make your stomach feel warm and fuzzy.
“good morning.” you grumble and he laughs. “it’s three o’clock in the afternoon.” you laugh with him and rest your head on the counter waiting for the coffee. “i didn’t think we drank that much last night, i don’t even remember most of it.” you confess with furrowed eyebrows trying to rake back through your memories.
tom looks almost solemn at your confession and nods. “yeah, me too. it’s all blurry.” he remembered everything. last nights escapades slowly come back as you think and you excuse yourself to the bathroom. thinking of what happened last night.
you and tom sat on your bedroom floor as you showed him all the books you’ve collected and his smile was so wide it made your heart jump at the sight. you rambled on and on about how you read the ballad of songbirds when it came out and how he channeled coriolanus so well but he was just staring at you, the wine coursing through both of your bloods. he lunged forward and captured your lips with his causing you to drop your book and wrap your arms around him.
you quickly brush your teeth and comb through your hair, trying to look somewhat decent. you slowly tread back into the kitchen and stare at tom. “i remember last night.” you quickly confessed. biting the inside of your cheek as tom turns to look at you. “do you regret it?” he quietly asks before you shake your head and step closer to him. “no, i don’t. i’ve liked you since i met you.” he smiles and wraps his arm around you while pouring your coffee into your favorite mug.
these are the hands of fate, you’re my achilles heel.
#billy the kid x reader#tom blyth x reader#tom blyth#tom blyth x reader fluff#tom blyth x you#tom blyth fluff#william bonney smut#william bonney fluff#william bonney x reader#william bonney#billy the kid fluff#billy bonney x reader#billy the kid#coriolanus snow smut#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus x you#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus fanfiction#coriolanus snow#rachel zegler#josh andres rivera
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christmas on my own - mason mount
summary: when Y/N finds herself spending Christmas alone for the first time in her life, a chance encounter with Mason may prove to be just the cure she needed for her holiday blues
pairing: Mason Mount x reader
word count: 6.3k
warnings/tags: semi-established relationship, the tiniest bit of angst at the beginning but overwhelming fluff for the rest of it, Christmas celebrations, awkward encounters with meeting the family for the first time
requested: no
notes: surprise!! Please ignore the fact that it's been three months since I last posted a fic. Life has been coming at me pretty fast this year, and it's made it incredibly difficult for me to find the time or motivation to write. But I've been thinking about and planning this one since almost October, so I wanted to be sure I was able to put this out as a little Christmas gift for you all!! Thank you for being so patient with my inconsistent posting schedule this year, and I hope you're all able to enjoy some time with your loved ones this holiday season! Also I know that Mila is still a baby, but for the sake of the fic, please pretend she's a toddler Merry Christmas to all of you, my loves!!
You blew hot air into your clenched fists in an attempt to warm them as you stood in the small Manchester café. The biting cold of the outdoors was still making your fingertips ache as you lingered near the counter, long after you had finished placing your order and paying.
You briefly surveyed the somewhat empty café, admiring the glowing lights and cheerful decorations that the owners had put out for the holiday season. A few sets of what you assumed to be grandparents and their grandchildren were also waiting alongside you, some of the children pressing their faces up against the glass display case as they relayed which pastries and treats they wanted to take home with them.
Today was the first Christmas that you had ever spent alone, and seeing the families happy and smiling together made your heart ache a bit, longing for your childhood when the season still felt magical and joyous.
To say that it had stung when your parents told you they would be travelling to spend the holiday with your brother would be an understatement. It had been unexpected, and they had only given you a little less than a week’s notice, meaning that as you were expected to work both the day before and after Christmas, you didn’t have enough time to make arrangements to go on the trip with them. You knew that your parents missed your brother as he had moved away a couple of years ago, and you understood why they would want to go see him and his wife that he had recently married. But it was hard to get left behind to spend the holiday that’s all about being together and giving to one another alone.
So now, on the afternoon of Christmas, you found yourself standing in a small bakery in Manchester, the very one that your family would always stop by on Christmas Day to get a few smalls treats to take back home after you had opened all of your gifts.
You had spent the morning at home, watching a couple Christmas films to try to put yourself in a festive mood and generally just feeling sorry for yourself. You had tried your best not to just mope about all day, but it proved difficult. By the time the afternoon rolled around, you decided that it just didn’t feel right to not make your annual trip to the bakery, even if it would be by yourself this year. So you had dragged yourself out of bed, put on a nice sweater and some black leggings and styled your hair a bit in the hopes of making yourself feel better, and decided to walk to the bakery in order to get a bit of fresh air.
You were lost in your own thoughts, fantasizing about the sweet taste of the coffee and pastry that would surely be coming your way soon when the bell above the entrance rang out. Your eyes naturally jumped over to the door to see where the noise was coming from, and your stomach sank to your feet when you saw who had stepped in.
It was Mason.
You and Mason had been going out for the last few weeks—not long enough to put an official label on it, but long enough that the two of you had gotten to know each other better and knew that you were both serious about this.
You had no idea what he was doing at the small bakery, but the last thing you wanted was for him to find out how pitiful you were, spending Christmas at home, alone on your couch.
Your hand darted up, scratching the side of your head in an attempt to hide your face from him as he approached the register only 10 feet away from you. Hoping that was enough to make sure he wouldn’t see you, your heart began to race as you realized that the worker would be calling out your name when your order was ready, and there would surely be no escape then.
You were beginning to contemplate the possibility of just leaving without the items you had paid for when his soft voice cut through your thoughts, thwarting any plans you’d had to run.
“Y/N?” he asked sweetly, and you could hear the smile in his voice. “Fancy seeing you here! Happy Christmas!”
You glanced up at him, his eyes bright as you tried to feign surprise at the sight of him.
“Mason, hi!” He drew you into a quick embrace, his scent surrounding you almost immediately. “Happy Christmas!” you mumbled into his chest before he released you.
“W-What are you doing here?” you rushed to ask, hoping to avoid any questions about your holiday celebrations.
“I’m actually on my way back home from training,” he spoke, scratching the back of his neck.
“Training? On Christmas?” you exclaimed. “That’s cruel!”
He laughed shortly, nodding along as he spoke. “I know, but we actually have a match tomorrow, so they couldn’t afford us a day off, unfortunately.” He shrugged, seeming like his cheery mood hadn’t been too phased by the interruption from his job. “But anyway, my family all came to mine for the holidays, and my nieces insisted I bring back a treat for them when I came home. I remembered you had mentioned this place, so I thought I should give it a try.”
Your heart fluttered at his mention of your conversation from a couple weeks ago. You had told him about the tradition in passing on a date when he had asked about how you and your family usually celebrated Christmas, and the fact that he had even remembered that detail meant the world to you.
“Oh, that’s so lovely that they were all still able to come up to celebrate with you,” you smiled at him.
“Yeah, they all arrived yesterday, and we did stockings this morning, but I’m sure my nieces are itching for me to get home so they can open the rest of their presents.”
Your chest felt warm at the way he always spoke about his family—especially his young nieces. Anyone could see from a mile off that he loved them all dearly.
“Are they going to be able to stay long?”
“They’ll be here for a couple of days, actually! Gonna be able to go to the game tomorrow as well, so I’m really excited to be able to have them there.” His grin spread nearly from ear to ear, the crinkles by his eyes becoming more pronounced. “But what about you? I’m assuming you’re here picking up the traditional Christmas pastries?”
Your heart sank, trying to find a way around the fact that you were alone for the holidays. You didn’t want him to pity you or to feel bad for expressing his joy over having his family with him. “Well, actually, I—um—”
“Y/N!” one of the bakery’s employees called out, placing a small to-go cup of coffee and a single, wrapped pastry on the counter. Your head dipped low, you walked over to the counter, picking up your order and quietly thanking the employee before you turned to walk back over to Mason. The look of confusion was unmistakable on his face as he looked at the single pastry in your hands, rather than the bulk order of treats that you had told him about weeks prior.
“My… parents actually went to visit my brother for the holidays,” you spoke quietly, having to force each word of your admission out. “So the order’s just for me today.” You forced a smile onto your face, hoping he wouldn’t see through the façade.
“Don’t tell me you’ve been on your own today,” Mason spoke, and you rushed to assure him that you were fine.
“I mean, yeah, but it’s—”
“Y/N, there’s no use in that. We have plenty of food and space at mine! You should’ve said something!”
“I—what?” His response caught you completely off-guard, not at all what you had expected him to say.
“Come over! We’d love to have you!” A huge smile spread across his face as he spoke to you. “There’s no reason for you to spend the holidays alone.”
“Mason, I couldn’t,” you immediately began trying to track back, but he didn’t seem at all discouraged by your protest. “I wouldn’t want to impose, and—”
“You’re not imposing, I’m inviting you,” he stated, matter-of-factly, as if it was just a simple matter. “My family would love to have you, and my nieces will be overjoyed to have someone new around!”
You were stumbling over your words, unable to fight against his persistence. “But… But I…”
“Look, we don’t have to say anything about us at all,” Mason said, sensing your resolve crumbling bit by bit. “You don’t have to meet my family as the girl that I’m dating, I’ll just introduce you as a friend. It’ll be completely fine.”
You bit your lip as you searched his face for any sign of hesitation. You couldn’t deny that the idea of joining in his family’s festivities did lift your spirits a little bit. The idea of being gathered around a Christmas tree and watching everyone opening gifts, maybe wrapped up in a warm blanket as you shared laughs with the others.
The final nail in the coffin for you was thinking about going back to your dreary apartment with the half-hearted decorations and spending the rest of the day by yourself.
“Please?” Mason pleaded with you one last time, his eyebrows raised as he gave you his best puppy dog eyes to convince you.
“You’re sure no one will mind?”
“I’m positive. My mum would be more upset with me if she found out I knew you were spending Christmas alone and didn’t bring you home.” The grin resumed its place on his lips as soon as you agreed, Mason bouncing slightly on his toes in giddy excitement.
Just at that moment, a voice rang out, calling Mason’s name, signaling that his order was ready to go. He quickly moved to the counter, scooping up the rather large box of pastries and holding it in one hand while he grabbed yours with the other and nearly dragged you out of the door of the bakery. You couldn’t help the giggle that slipped from your lips at his almost child-like glee at your agreement to join his family for the rest of their Christmas celebrations.
“Alright, you want to just follow me there?” he asked as the two of you strode into the parking lot. You had been to his place once before for a movie night, but he wanted to be certain you got there safely and didn’t lose your way.
“I actually walked here from my apartment, so would you mind if I just rode with you?” you asked sheepishly.
“Of course, love.” The pet name slipped out without him even thinking about it as he led you to the passenger side of his car, opening the door for you. Testing his luck a bit, Mason pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head as you stepped past him to get into the car, and you felt the heat rushing into your cheeks as he closed the door behind you.
He popped in the driver’s seat, starting the engine and turning the radio onto some station playing nonstop Christmas music, and the two of you were off, heading in the direction of his home.
You were thankful that his house was a little while away as it gave you time to collect yourself before walking into a room full of Mason’s closest family members. You thanked your lucky stars that you had gotten to urge to dress at least a little bit nice before leaving your apartment that morning so that you’d be presentable for meeting them.
After all, even if he introduced you to them as his friend this time around, if things with Mason went the way you hoped they would, you’d be seeing them many times again in the future, and you wanted to make a good first impression.
The drive to his house was comfortable. The moments of silence were peaceful and never tense. The two of you caught up a bit since you hadn’t seen each other for a few days, and you tried your best not to think too hard about the nerve-wracking evening ahead of you. Mason kept glancing over at your bouncing knee—he could tell that you were nervous, and you could tell that he was fighting the urge to hold your hand.
So, in a moment of bravery, you reached over, bringing his free hand into your lap and intertwining your fingers. You couldn’t help the way your heart fluttered at the slight blush that crept up his cheeks and over the bridge of his nose as he began stroking his thumb across your knuckles, back and forth in a soothing motion.
Sooner than you were prepared for, Mason turned into the long driveway that wound back to his house, and you swallowed a nervous lump as his house came into view.
“You’re sure this is okay?” you asked as he put the car in park and turned off the engine, still somewhat nervous about intruding on their family holiday.
“Y/N, it’s fine,” Mason held your face in both of his hands for a moment, trying to reassure you to the best of his ability. “My mum loves hosting new people, so she’s gonna be super excited when I bring you in there!”
Something about the way he said that made your ears perk up. “Wait, Mason—Mason!” you exclaimed as he quickly got out of the driver’s seat. You threw open your door, leaping to your feet despite the fact that Mason was on his way around to your side to open the door for you. “Did you not at least text them to let them know I was coming with you?” you asked, exasperated.
Mason shrugged as if he didn’t see what the big deal was, shaking his head ‘no.’
“Mason! I can’t just—”
He cut you off by pressing his finger to your lips, gently shushing you. “Hey, trust me,” he looked intensely into your eyes. “It’s okay,” he said slowly.
Your shoulders slumped slightly, resigning yourself to him as you whispered a soft “okay.”
He tapped the tip of your nose and a quiet giggle escaped from your lips. You hated and loved how this boy could turn you into complete mush in mere moments. It made you feel so giddy but also so vulnerable at the same time, and it was a feeling you were still getting used to.
He held onto the car door, letting you step out from behind it before closing it and gestured for you to head toward his front door once he had retrieved the box of pastries from his back seat. He reassured you of his presence just behind you with his hand placed gently on the small of your back.
You hesitated at the front door, letting out a shuddery breath.
“Hey, it’s no biggie. Don’t freak yourself out, okay?” Mason spoke as if he had been able to read your mind, sneaking one final kiss to your forehead before stepping toward the door and reaching for the doorknob. Even though you hadn’t been seeing each other for very long, you noticed how Mason couldn’t seem to help himself from those small touches—the little gestures of reassurance like the forehead kisses, a hand on your back, and gentle touch on your knee—and it kind of surprised you how much they settled you, as you had never been big on copious amounts of physical touch in your past relationships.
Mason stepped through the doorway into his home, and you followed behind him, doing your best to still your racing heart.
It was only seconds after the sound of the door opening could be heard within the house that you hear the sound of tiny feet slapping on the floor, heading in your direction. Moments later, two little girls rounded the corner and came bolting toward you and Mason as he closed the door behind the two of you, the air filled with their squeals and giggles.
“Uncle Masey! Uncle Masey!” they screamed, wrapping their arms around each of his legs. Mason immediately matched their energy, clearly just as excited to be coming home to them as he squeezed them close to his body with his free hand. You took the box of pastries from him so that he could bend down, scooping them both up in his arms and pressing kisses all over their faces. The girls giggled and screamed as he told them how much he had missed them between kisses.
Mason finally pulled back after one final, dramatic kiss that had the older of the two wiping at her cheek and she laughed at him. If you had thought the way Mason spoke about his nieces was sweet, it was nothing compared to the way he acted around them.
“Summer, Mila, this is Y/N,” Mason spoke once the girls’ giggles had quieted.
“Is she your wife?” the older girl asked, and your mouth dropped open in shock.
Mason, clearly amused by her question, threw his head back and laughed. “No, Summer. Y/N is just my friend.”
“Oh, okay,” Summer shrugged, quickly moving on from the conversation, wiggling so that Mason would set her back on the floor. Immediately she took off, running out of sight and Mason followed behind her with Mila still in his arms.
Voices could be heard coming from the kitchen, and you remained just behind Mason as you followed him, hoping that his body would shield you from the rest of his family.
When you found the others, you first saw Summer crawling up into one of the tall chairs at the kitchen bar, surrounded by numerous others. Perfectly-shaped gingerbread cookies lined the countertop, placed on sheets of wax paper, and bags of differently-colored icing were strewn around the countertop, along with various shapes and sizes of sprinkles. Cheerful Christmas music was ringing out through the room, and a warm feeling spread through your chest at the sight of it all.
Several of Mason’s family members greeted him as soon as the three of you entered the spacious kitchen, happy to see him back home from training.
Mason wasted no time in bringing you around to his side with a gentle hand between your shoulders before he let his hand fall to his side, not wanting to make you feel self-conscious in front of his family.
“Guys, this is my friend, Y/N,” Mason smiled at you reassuringly. “She’s gonna be joining us for the rest of the day.”
His introduction irked you slightly, wanting to give more of an explanation for why you were crashing their holiday when Summer piped up from where she was very focused on decorating her gingerbread man. “And she’s not Uncle Masey’s wife.”
A chorus of laughs rang through the room, and you felt your cheeks heat up, forcing a laugh to try to play off the fact that you felt like you were about to pee your pants.
A woman who you could only assume was Mason’s mother wiped her hands off on a dish towel, walking in your direction with open arms.
“Oh, it’s so lovely to meet you, Y/N! I’m Debbie—Mason’s mum,” she spoke, confirming your guess. Mason quickly snatched the box of pastries from you so your hands were free and Debbie pulled you into a tight embrace—it was one of those hugs where you felt every muscle in your body relax a bit, and immediately you felt a little bit more settled in the unfamiliar environment.
“Thank you so much for having me.” You felt a bit silly, thanking her for being willing to do something she hadn’t even really agreed to in the first place.
“No, no, it’s nothing!” Debbie pulled back from the hug, waving her hand at you before she led you further into the kitchen, beginning to introduce you to everyone. You met Mason’s father, Tony, who had greeted you with the same warm embrace that Debbie had, and then she introduced you to Mason’s brother, Lewis, and his sister Jaz and her husband before repeating the young girls’ names to you. Everyone had greeted you cheerfully, not even blinking an eye at the fact that Mason had brought a stranger home to join their Christmas celebration.
It wasn’t long before Debbie had you set up with your own sheet of wax paper and a cookie to decorate. You caught Mason’s eye, a sweet smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye that said I told you so.
You were surprised at how easy it was to settle in with Mason’s family. You had never been someone that was good at meeting new people, and it typically took you a while to warm up to them. But Mason’s family wasted no time in treating you as one of their own, and it almost felt natural to be there with them within minutes.
Playful banter was exchanged, Summer and Mila were shouting for everyone to look at their sprinkle-covered cookies, and everyone was laughing. Mason settled into his spot next to you, nudging you gently with his shoulder.
Mason’s family asked a little bit about yourself, but they kept the questions light, and you were thankful that they didn’t try to dig into why Mason had brought you home.
Once all the cookies had been decorated, the girls began shouting that it was time to open presents and Jaz had to wrestle them into wiping their hands and faces clean of icing before they took off, sprinting in the direction of the living room.
Once everyone had settled in the living room, some on the couch, some sitting on the floor, Tony donned a large Santa hat and beard before he began to distribute the gifts that were under and around the tree. You had kicked your shoes off by the door and tucked your legs up under you as you settled into the cushions next to Mason, a respectable amount of space still between you as you still didn’t really know how to handle yourselves around his family.
Each person opened their presents as Tony handed them out, one by one, and everyone ooh-ed and ahh-ed as each gift was uncovered. Debbie and Jaz were taking lots of photos of everyone as they tore into their gifts. Your heart swelled at the thoughtful gifts that were exchanged. It became quickly apparent that remembering small details about the things people said was something that Mason had gotten from his family.
Mason kept silently checking in on you, glancing over to make sure you doing okay. You could feel his gaze on the side of your face, glancing over and making eye contact with him before shooting him an assuring smile.
By the time all of the presents were open and the wrapping paper and ribbons had been collected and put into trash bags, it was nearing dinner time and Debbie disappeared back into the kitchen to put the finishing touches on the food. You sprang to your feet, naturally wanting to help her as a thank you for having you as a guest (despite her insistence that you didn’t need to), and Jaz joined the two of you soon after.
Conversation flowed naturally between the three of you, and you felt completely at ease talking with them as you worked to finish the finals bits of the Christmas dinner, most of it having been prepared before and very little needing to be done to finish it.
The fated question finally came up as the three of you were carrying everything to the table.
“So, Y/N, I don’t mean to pry, but I’ve got to ask.” Your heart leapt immediately at Debbie’s words. “Are you and Mason only friends, or is there something more going on there?”
You pondered for a moment how to answer her question. At the beginning of the day, you would never have dreamed of admitting the nature of your relationship with Mason to his mother. But now, after the time you had spent with him, you settled on telling her the truth. You knew you were serious about the budding relationship between the two of you, and you knew he was, too. Though you hadn’t officially put any labels on it, having decided to take things slow, you had started being more open about it with your circle of friends.
“Well, I… we’ve… gone on a few dates,” you started, and a pleased smile took over Debbie’s face. “We’re taking things slow, but he’s been an absolute gentleman and he’s been nothing short of amazing to me.”
Debbie beamed with pride at your words. “Well, I didn’t raise him to be anything less than that, so I’m glad to hear it.”
“We haven’t been going out for very long, and I really wasn’t planning on crashing your family’s Christmas today,” you felt the need to explain yourself, now that you were putting all of your cards on the table. “My family… they actually are out of town visiting my brother this holiday season, and I happened to run into Mason at the bakery this afternoon. As soon as he found out I was spending Christmas on my own, he insisted I come back here with him, and he was not taking no for an answer,” you chuckled at the recent memory.
“Oh, love,” Debbie’s face held a slight pout as she instantly read the sadness that you tried to hide over not spending the holiday with your family. She pulled you into another of her amazing hugs, placing a quick kiss on your cheek as she drew away. “Well I speak for everyone when I say we’ve loved having you here with us.”
Your mind flashed back to how unphased everyone had been by your arrival. “Does Mason do this a lot? Picking up strays for the holidays?” you tried to play off your question with a laugh, momentarily wondering if you were just another girl on a long list.
Debbie shook her head. “No, he’s never done anything like this before. And he’s certainly never brought a girl home for something like this,” she spoke, calming your nerves. You had felt a bit silly for asking in the first place, but her words soothed your fleeting insecurities. “But hopefully we can look forward to having you at many Christmases in the future,” she beamed, patting your cheek before she wandered back into the kitchen and refraining from prying any further.
You blew out a long breath that you didn’t even realize you had been holding, trying to wrap your head around the conversation you had just had—with a woman you had only met a few hours ago. And it wasn’t just some normal thing for Mason to bring girls home during the holidays, but everyone had just been that welcoming to you, despite showing up without warning. Your chest felt full, swelling with love for Mason and his family.
Debbie called the others to the table to eat, and you wandered in the direction of the living room, hoping to catch Mason for a moment before you joined the others. The rest of his family filtered out of the room, leaving you and Mason alone for the first time in the last few hours.
“You doing okay?” Mason asked, and you wordlessly wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in his chest and holding onto him tighter than you ever had before. Caught a bit off-guard by the affection, Mason wrapped his arms gently around your body, running his fingers up and down your spine.
His heart sank when you pulled your head back to look at him, arms still wrapped around his torso, and he saw the tears welling in your eyes.
“What happened, love?! Did someone say something—”
“Thank you,” you whispered, your lower lip trembling.
“For what, love?” Mason cradled your cheek in one of his hands, swiping his thumb under your eye to wipe away a tear. You noticed that he used the pet name more frequently when he was concerned.
“For bringing me here. For introducing me to your family. They’re amazing, Mason.”
A look of relief and adoration washed over Mason’s face and he smiled at you, leaning down to press his forehead to yours. “I’m so glad you came.”
“Me, too,” you let your eyes slip closed, allowing yourself to take a moment to yourselves and let your heart settle a bit.
“You know your mom asked me about us?” you broke the silence after a few seconds.
“Yeah?” he pulled back to look at your face, trying to gauge your reaction. “And what did you tell her?”
“The truth,” you gently shrugged your shoulders. “That we’ve gone out a few times and we’re taking things pretty slow, but that I think I’ll probably keep you around.”
“Yeah?” he grinned, and you nodded in response.
“Come on, we should probably head in there before Summer comes looking,” you pulled back, wiping away any stray tears with the sleeve of your sweater, hoping that no one would be able to tell how emotional you had just gotten.
The two of you joined the others at the table, taking your place between Mason and Summer after she had insisted you sit beside her, much to Mason’s fake offense. The food was incredible, as it had been a while since you’d had a big home-cooked meal like this, and you were sure to let Debbie know how much you enjoyed it. When everyone’s plates were empty, everyone took part in the freshly-decorated cookies and Mason and Lewis cleared the dishes, being sure to push you, Debbie, and Jaz toward the living room before any of you tried to help.
You were just returning from a quick trip to the bathroom when the boys walked back in from the kitchen, and you noticed everyone settling back down on the couch.
“We always watch a Christmas film after dinner, but I can take you home if you’re ready to leave,” Mason explained to you.
You thought over the offer for a moment, deciding you weren’t really ready to part from Mason and his family just yet.
“I mean… I wouldn’t mind sticking around a little while longer—unless you guys were wanting it to be just a family thing,” you rushed to add, not wanting to overstay your welcome.
Your words were met with immediate protest from the rest of Mason’s family, each of them insisting that you stay, and Mason smiled down at you. “Yeah, what they said.”
You giggled, letting him lead you around to sit next to him on the couch, allowing yourself to sit a bit closer to him than you had earlier that afternoon.
Tony even offered for you to pick the film, but as soon as Summer had shouted her desire to watch Elf, you were all agreed.
Mason threw a fluffy blanket over both of your legs as the movie’s opening scene played. “Is this okay?” he whispered, trying not to draw anyone else’s attention and you nodded in return.
You tucked your legs under your body, allowing your knee to rest slightly on his thigh and your shoulder to lean onto his, now feeling more comfortable showing some affection around Mason’s family.
The movie played on, and your heart soared listening to Summer and Mila giggle and clap their hands at their favorite bits. You felt at home there with Mason and his family, all cozied up in his living room on the night of Christmas as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Your heart swelled with the love that you already felt for all of them, and though you knew it was still a bit soon, you couldn’t wait to get to know them and get to spend more time with them as your relationship with Mason developed.
As comfortable as you were and with all of the lights in the house turned off for the movie, you didn’t even realize your eyes were slipping closed until you jolted awake, recognizing the scene on the TV as one that was near to the end of the movie. Mason must have felt the sudden movement from where your head was resting on his shoulder, and he took your hand in his, running his thumbs over your knuckles to calm you, the same way he had done in the car earlier that day.
You nestled your head further into his shoulder, savoring the last few moments you had with Mason and his family before the movie ended.
It was over sooner than you would have liked, and everyone sat up from where they had sunk into the couch cushions, stretching and yawning. It was clear that everyone was exhausted from the day’s festivities. You rubbed the sleep from your eyes, noticing Jaz and her husband quietly scooping up the girls from where they, too, had fallen asleep, and carried them down the hallway, seemingly to put them to bed.
“You ready to go home?” Mason asked you quietly as everyone began to rise from the couch. You nodded. “Okay, let me go grab my keys and we can head out.”
“Oh, Mason, I can just call an Uber or something, I don’t want to take you away from your family—”
“Absolutely not,” he cut you off. “You think I’m gonna let some stranger come pick you up and drive your back to your apartment?” You grinned at him, unable to find the words to answer him. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.” His voice held an air of playful sarcasm.
Slowly, the two of you made your way to the front entrance. Everyone bade you goodbye as you made to leave. Debbie was sure to get a couple more hugs in before you left, insisting that you come around the next time they were up to visit, and you promised that you would.
Before long, you found yourself sitting in Mason’s car once again as he backed out into the street and set out on the route to your apartment. You were leaning across the center console of his car, leaning your head on his shoulder, and holding his free hand in yours.
You were feeling especially affectionate after the day you had, full of love for him and his family. The drive was silent as you listened to the music softly playing from his radio, no words needed to communicate to each other how you were feeling.
Before long, Mason pulled into the parking lot of your apartment complex and insisted upon walking you up to your door, like the gentleman he always was.
As you reached your door, you turned to face him, giggling at the cliché of it all as you wrapped your arms around his torso. He pulled you in close to him, holding you tightly as he beamed down at you.
“Was your Christmas okay, then? Even though you didn’t get to spend it the way you usually do?”
“Mason, it was wonderful,” you smiled up at him, feeling like there were no words that would do justice for how the day had made you feel. “It was better than I ever could have imagined. Thank you for bringing me home with you today. I was honestly feeling awful after spending the morning by myself and this was the best Christmas miracle I could’ve ever dreamed up.”
Mason squeezed you a little tighter, pleased that his impulsive decision at the bakery to invite you to his home had worked out. “I’m so glad you were there. I’m so glad you got to meet them.”
“I am, too. And I’m glad I got to share this day with you.” Your heart felt like it was overflowing, and you could barely hold yourself together.
You snaked one of your hands around the back of Mason’s neck, threading your fingers into his hair and pulling him down to join your lips in a long but gentle kiss. It was the first one you had shared all day, as Mason had been waiting for you to initiate it first, but you couldn’t refrain from indulging yourself any longer. This was surely your favorite kiss that the two of you had shared, even more so than your first. It was so full of unspoken passion and love, and it left your head spinning when you finally pulled apart for air, foreheads still pressed together.
Mason couldn’t help but press two more quick pecks on your lips before finally pulling back to look at you. The two of you just smiled at each other for a moment, and you studied Mason’s features as you stood there.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” Mason whispered, breaking the silence.
“Goodnight, Mason,” you replied. “Thank you for everything today.” Mason’s only response was a firm kiss on your forehead before he unwound his arms from your body, taking a couple of steps backward as he began heading back to his car.
You watched him walk down the hallway, glancing back at you with a wave before he rounded the corner, and you entered your apartment.
Closing your eyes and leaning against the closed door, you smiled to yourself. You may not have known Mason for long, but already, you were certain that this boy meant the absolute world to you, and his family had found their place securely in your heart.
tag list: @landoslover @thoseboysinblue @lovelynikol16 @swimmingismywholelife @masonsrem @brasiliangp @neverinadream @lizzypotter14 @notsoattractivearenti @chilwellspulisic @mm-vii @captainpulisic
#mason mount#mason mount x reader#mason mount imagine#mason mount fic#footballer fic#footballer imagine#mason mount fluff#mason mount fanfic#mason mount one shot#mason mount blurb
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Bucky Barnes x Chubby!Reader imagine
It had been really difficult to blow Bucky off each time he asked to hang out. In fact it had been really difficult to ignore the whole friendship group. If you went out with Steve, no doubt Bucky would be there. If you went out with Nat, no doubt Bucky would hear and ask you to meet him the following day. The same goes for Sam, Wanda and, fuck it, even Tony.
So you all but secluded yourself in your room. Which wasn't your choice really but your boyfriend Alex hadn't taken kindly to your close relationship with another man. He wasn't convinced that even though you two grew up together you could be 'just friends'. And to his credit he wasn't really wrong. You had harboured a fat crush on your closest friend for a while but it was unrequited and then Alex came into your life and he was the first guy who actually showed an interest in you. It wasn't something you were used to in the slightest. Being friends with beauties like Natasha and Wanda you were often looked over by those not in the friend group but Alex had sought you out.
So here you were, on a Saturday, missing out whatever fun shenanigans were going on. Scrolling through various apps in your pjs like a party animal.
A knock at your door startled you out of mindlessly scrolling.
You sat yourself up and hoped to god you weren't nose blind and the room smelt okay.
"I'm decent." You joked.
The door opened and the very person you were avoiding ducked his head in. Fuck Bruce. You had told him not to let anyone in.
"Oh my god. You're alive." He joked back shutting the door behind himself. Bucky sauntered into your room, with the same swagger he always had, plonking himself down on your bed.
Not sure what to say in response, you go to the diplomatic, "You okay?"
He gives you a half shrug and leans backwards. "Missing my partner in crime. Thought I'd visit you."
You merely nod in reply.
This is the first ever awkward silence you and Bucky had sat through. It spread out horribly, stretching until you gave a very fake cough. Hoping any noise would solve it. It didn't.
"Right, okay, just go straight to the point." Bucky muttered. "Look, why are you avoiding me, angel? What did I do?"
Bucky's gaze was always piercing but today the intensity winded you. Why were you avoiding him?
There was no use lying anymore. You'd used up all your excuses anyway. You couldn't be sick again or have work again you just needed to tell him. He deserves honesty. "Alex isn't our biggest fan."
"Yeah, I knew that." Bucky chuckled. "I just didn't realise his dick was worth all your friends." You tutted at his crude remark. "He told me off for piggybacking you at the fair. 'she doesn't let me carry her, why are you'." His impression was eerily good.
You chuckled a little at the idea of Alex confronting Bucky. "He was not pleased that evening."
"He doesn'-" Bucky shook his head.
"Doesn't what?"
"Nothing." He ran a hand through his locks. "Where is he anyway?"
"He's at a friend's birthday."
Bucky's eyebrows were in his hairline. "And he hasn't taken you?"
This was a sore topic. But you'd been honest so far... "I didn't fit into the dress."
Now he was frowning. "What dress?"
You motioned to your wardrobe. "He brought me a dress, I've been working to get into it but."
"Been wor-" Bucky's frown somehow got deeper. "Why would he buy you a dress that doesn't fit you?"
Your mouth opened and closed but you didn't have an answer.
Bucky stomped over to the wardrobe and opened it. There was a dress resting against the door, it was enclosed in plastic so he had to unzip it. The dress was tiny. It was a little strappy thing with far too many holes. What were the holes supposed to- oh they were going to expose your sides and back.
"This i-" He turned to you. "You'd never wear this. It's not even your colour."
You couldn't agree more. "I know, it's been a little arguement between us." That was an understatement.
"I still don't understand why he brought you something that didn't fit." You shrugged but before you could respond he continued, "what's this?"
Your eyes flicked down to the pile he was caught on. "Oh, those ar- those are your hoodies."
Bucky gave you a confused face. "Bu- these are yours, angel."
You smiled sweetly at him. "Alex wasn'-"
"I don't care about him. He buys you shit that doesn't fit, he goes to parties without you, he isolates you from your friends." Bucky sat back on the bed but much closer, just by your hip. "Why are you with him?"
You didn't know. You liked him. You think you love him. But when you really think of it, you don't know. You're not any happier with him than if you weren't. Sometimes he says things and you feel fat in a bad way. You'd be the first to say you weren't thin but the way he says it makes you feel wrong. "He's the first guy to actually show an interest in me, I suppose at first I enjoyed it but when you say it like that."
"He is not the first guy to show you an interest." Bucky shook his head in disbelief. "You're gorgeous."
You rolled your eyes. "Thanks. But when I'm out with the gang I'm not really being looked at."
"You are." Bucky vowed. "I- people do look at you. I-I sometimes don't like the way they look at you and maybe I dance with you and maybe I take you on the Ferris wheel."
Why wouldn't he like the way they looked at you? Your brows pulled. "The way they look at me?"
"Like you're just a quick fuck." He instantly regretted that. "No, they look at you with lust but I know they would leave. They wouldn't treat you right. They wouldn't care for you." His eyes were bright and honest. He wasn't embarrassed by his confession.
You had nothing. No response. What could you say that wouldn't betray the crush? You didn't still like him, no, well ... When he looked at you like that...
"Come on." He clapped a hand on your knee. "Get changed let's get pizza." The look on your face must've shown your obvious debate. "I don't care if you don't fit into that dress, you look like you haven't eaten anything good in ages."
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#james barnes#james buchanan barnes#modern au#bucky barnes x chubby!reader
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YOU WROTE A SONG ABOUT ME? | Oscar Piastri
f1 one shots masterlist | wattpad | ao3 | instagram
oscar piastri x singer!reader
requested by anon: x singer!reader, maybe Oscar and his family going to her show and she sings a song about him
word count: 2402
warnings: none of them! use of y/n and y/l/n
posible part 2 if you like it and ask for it!
you can send your one shots requests here!
Oscar was nervous. Very, in fact.
It wasn't the first time he attended a concert of Y/N, his girlfriend, but every time he did he ended up getting more nervous than he should.
Perhaps the fact that today was his twenty-third birthday and he hadn't received any kind of congratulations from her had a lot to do with it.
The Australian took a deep breath and continued on, trying to catch up with his sisters and parents as quickly as possible, who had barely noticed that the boy had fallen behind, immersed in his thoughts.
Nicole quickly turned around, going to where her son was as calmly as she could, and above all making sure not to do or say anything she would regret, especially not something that would ruin the surprise her daughter-in-law had been keeping so well.
"What's wrong, honey?"
Oscar slightly startled as he felt his mother's hand on his shoulder, even letting out a small scream that startled the woman.
"Yes, of course!" the boy hurried to say, trying to calm down. "Just... I'm a little nervous, but that's all, really."
Despite the Australian's efforts to sound as calm as possible, it was in vain. Nicole could see his anxiety in his gaze and, above all, in his gestures. His hands were barely still, and every time she tried to walk beside him, he ended up putting a little more distance between them.
"I'm your mother, Oscar, you know I can catch any lie like I've done so many times before. Why are you so nervous?"
He sighed. He didn't want to share his concern, especially when they were heading to see the main reason of it.
"Well..." he tried to find the right words, finding it quite difficult. "It's just that I haven't received any message from Y/N today. Today, of all days, you know? On my birthday."
"Oh, what a shame..." the woman replied, feigning surprise. "She must have forgotten or had some problem. Have you talked to her?"
Was she really asking him that? He just told her he hadn't received any message from the brunette...
"Yes, but she hasn't replied."
"Don't worry! I'm sure there's a reason for it," assured the Piastri matriarch. "Don't let this ruin your day. If that girl doesn't call you as soon as it strikes twelve, I promise she'll have to deal with me."
"Mom..."
"No mom, Oscar," she scolded him in an ironic tone, making him laugh. "Now try to enjoy her concert and have a good time with us, okay?"
The brown-haired young man nodded, grateful for his mother's support, and continued on his way to the Rod Laver Arena, now a bit happier than before.
After passing through security checks and receiving the VIP accreditations reserved for the Piastri family, and the occasional stops for the pilot to take some photos and sign autographs with fans who recognized him, which were quite a few, they made their way to their reserved spot, located in the lower side stands just a few meters from the main stage.
"Wow, I didn't know you were so famous to have so many people following you," joked his father, making his sisters laugh.
"You should take a break!" shouted his mother, hugging him and making his cheeks turn red. "You're at your girlfriend's concert, not at one of your stupid races."
"They're the ones who make me who I am, Mom. Besides, I'm a public figure," added the brown-eyed one. "I can't ignore them and act like nothing, you know? It's not that easy."
Oscar said that, but he still felt uneasy. As he looked at his family, already occupying their seats as there was still about half an hour before the concert started, the need to see his girlfriend or at least hear some news about her was taking over him more and more.
"Mom, I'm going to see if I can find out anything about Y/N," he said impulsively, interrupting himself with his own words. "I'll be right back."
Nicole looked at him with surprise, telling him no, to wait there, and they would see what to do after the concert. But the young man had already gained some momentum and was navigating through everyone in his way around the stands, seats, stairs, and multiple corridors until he reached the place where, supposedly, his girl was.
Once he reached the supposed dressing room, a perfectly uniformed black security guard, with a completely serious expression and crossed arms, stood in front of the door.
"Um... I'm Oscar," he greeted with a wave, trying to curve his lips without trembling. "I'm Y/N’s boyfriend," he timidly pointed to the door behind him with his hand. "Do you mind if I come in?"
"I'm sorry, Mr. Piastri, but Y/N has agreed that there are no visitors before the concert today," the man responded firmly, still looking at Oscar seriously and shaking his head.
"It's just a moment. I want to wish her good luck before she goes on stage," he insisted, hoping the guard might make an exception.
"I'm sorry, sir. Rules are rules, and if the young lady said no, then it's no. I can't make any exceptions, even for you."
The Australian thanked the unfriendly man with a slight nod and, feeling defeated, made his way back to where his family was. As soon as he arrived, he had his sisters pestering him:
"Did you see Y/N? Did she say anything to you? Did she leave you wanting something, and that's why you look so depressed now?"
The eldest sister's insistence was making him feel even worse than he already did; having the other two join in the sudden conversation with curious faces and even more unsettling questions made him want to leave the place.
The young man simply remained silent. He sat in his seat and kept his gaze fixed on the stage, waiting for the lights to go out and the concert to begin.
It was a matter of the singer stepping onto the stage for the crowd to rise to their feet, applauding and chanting her name, shouting compliments and praises of all kinds.
"Good evening, Melbourne!" exclaimed Y/N, who was on a platform that had risen from the bottom of the stage. "I hope you all have a great time with me tonight because I assure you that today will be full of surprises!"
Nicole Piastri got up from her seat, as did the rest of the family, and told Oscar to do the same. He refused, remaining seated with his arms crossed, but unable to stop a smile from appearing on his lips.
He might be upset with his girlfriend's behavior for who knows what reason, but it was impossible for him not to look away from her while she danced, sang, and interacted with the audience.
It was too difficult for him not to feel proud of her and everything she had achieved.
The show continued as Oscar knew it would, having memorized it from the numerous times he had not only attended various concerts of his girlfriend's tour around the world but also from the countless rehearsals he had accompanied her to.
However, Piastri did not expect that suddenly the lights would go out and an orange glow would begin to emerge everywhere, especially illuminating the stage.
Y/N appeared again, now wearing an orange bodysuit with perfectly placed blue tones that accentuated her figure.
"Do you know what day’s today?" asked the brunette, looking with wide eyes at the audience.
"April 6th!"
She nodded, a playful smile forming on her lips more and more as she was about to reveal, and trying not to turn her head towards where her boyfriend was, whom she had deliberately avoided all day and who, possibly, would tell her to screw off after all the ghosting she had done to him on his birthday.
"And, by any chance... do you know what happens today?"
There were a variety of responses. A large part of them answered that it was Oscar's birthday, her partner's. Others were somewhat wild, as if she was about to reveal that the couple was expecting a baby, or that the young woman was going to announce her retirement from the stage after her very short musical career.
"No, it's none of that," the Australian ended up saying. "I am pleased to announce that today, here, right now, I am going to debut my new single, 'Throttle Hearts'!"
The stadium erupted in cheers and applause once again. No one, not even Oscar, expected this revelation from the girl, so it was completely normal for people to ask her to sing the song already.
Y/N, however, asked them for a moment with her hand.
Quickly, she ran to her cell phone and, secluded in a small corner of the stage, tried to make sure that the camera recording to broadcast her image on the large screens captured nothing.
At that very moment, Oscar's phone vibrated in his pocket with a notification from the same girl who was on stage:
"Happy birthday, my love! I'm so sorry for ghosting you all day, but I hope it was worth it. If you understand any references in the song, it's normal bc it's based on our story. I hope this is the best gift you can receive, at least for now, in your life. I can't wait to get off stage and give you the biggest hug in the world <3"
And there was Y/N, making eye contact with him, having a minimal interaction with her boyfriend for the first time all day. The girl had her arm raised, waving enthusiastically and making heart gestures with both hands that ended sooner than expected as she went to the piano to play the first chords of the song.
Oscar found himself trying to hide some tears, which were forming in his eyes not only as Y/N’s voice adjusted to the melody but throughout the rest of the concert.
The only thing the boy could reply to that message was whether she had really written a song about him, receiving as a response during a break between songs a large number of heart shaped emojis.
When the show came to an end and the singer disappeared beneath the stage, the Piastri family quickly grabbed their belongings to leave the venue and go to where the boy's girlfriend was. The same security guard who had previously denied him access to see the singer to the Formula 1 driver was now standing next to them, telling them to follow him.
Obviously, they didn't hesitate to say yes and followed his steps to the young woman's dressing room, who allowed her boyfriend's family to enter, welcoming them with a radiant smile and hugs that had been delayed all day.
The only thing the young couple did as words were exchanged was to look at each other, shy to show their love in front of others, as it had always been with them.
"I think we should leave the lovebirds alone for a while," Nicole began as she headed towards the exit of the room. "Don't take too long, the reservation for dinner at Oscar's favorite restaurant is at ten fifteen, and you know we take quite a while to get there."
Both of them thanked her shyly, unsure of what to do or say beyond being unable to stop smiling.
When they were alone, facing each other, they didn't know what they should say to each other. Oscar Piastri didn't know if he should reproach his girlfriend for not speaking to him all day despite preparing a surprise for him. Y/N Y/L/N was aware that perhaps she should apologize for not having done things quite right and for keeping the brown-haired boy on edge by maintaining some sort of no-contact for the past 24 hours.
Finally, it was the McLaren driver who broke the not-so-uncomfortable silence:
"Y/N, that song..." He was at a loss for words. He didn't know what else to say other than that he had loved it.
The girl smiled shyly, grateful not only that he had liked the composition she had kept to herself for the past seven months, but also for seeming to have understood.
"I've been wanting to sing it to you for a long time, but I didn't know if you’d like it," the young woman admitted. "It has had a couple of important modifications since the first draft, and since the record label wasn't cooperating much when I wanted to release it initially, I thought it would be a good birthday gift for you," she explained. "Hey, and I'm sorry if this whole game of ignoring you all day has offended you. I feel really bad, and the last thing I want is..."
"Shut up, silly!" Oscar interrupted her, approaching her to wrap her in his arm and give her a tender kiss on the forehead. "At first, I thought you wanted to break up with me, but then seeing how my mom was acting, that gorilla you have as a bodyguard denying me access, and above all you ignoring me all day..."
"I'm good at keeping secrets, and I'm absolutely in love with you, Oscar Piastri," Y/N declared, mock-offended. "Do you really think I would ignore you all day?"
"Not a chance. I know there's a good intention behind everything you do," agreed the Australian, earning himself a hug and a kiss on the lips from his girlfriend. "Did you know that I'm also good at keeping secrets?"
"Oh, really? And are you absolutely in love with me like I am with you, Piastri?"
Oscar grinned mischievously, an idea starting to appear in his mind like a flash that was making more and more sense.
Obviously, the driver was a tad resentful, and the girl wasn't going to get away with it no matter how good the intention was behind Throttle Hearts and its surprise presentation.
Now, Oscar had to prepare a surprise for the girl's twenty-second birthday that would match, or even surpass, the one she had prepared for him.
"I don't know," he shrugged, laughing more and more emphatically and perhaps frustrating his girlfriend, "I guess now you'll have to wait for your birthday to find out."
#oscar piastri#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri one shot#request#anon#requests open#oscar piastri x yn#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x singer reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri one shots#op81 imagine#op81 x reader#formula 1#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 one shots#formula 1 x reader
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Today will be good
A/n: lowkey hate this fr but Inês doesn’t get the recognition she deserves
Warnings: slight explicit maybe idk
“Nesh,” I murmur my head buried in her chest as my hair coverd my face. I practically dug my head into her as I tried to ignore the sound of the ringing alarm.
It was so annoying. I can’t believe we forgot to shut it off last night, now I was up at 8 on an off day. I was so comfortable, Neshy laying bellow me her warm arms holding me to her. She’s so perfect, this is my perfect moment.
“Hmm,” she said still half asleep her arm wrapping around me pulling me closer to her. If there was one thing about Inês it was that anything she couldn’t sleep through she would fake sleep though. Which is what I’m guessing she was doing now to avoid shutting of the alarm even though it was closer to her.
“Neshy the alarm,” I murmur again trying to pull away from her grasp. She groaned slightly pulling me back towards her. I manage to pull away and hear Inês sigh in defeat flopping back onto the bed.
I smile slightly as I reach over her to the night stand and shut off the alarm. I was once again reminded how annoyed I was that we hadn’t shut it off last night. It was the very rare occasion that me and Nesh had the same off day.
Me being busy with volleyball and her with basketball made it very difficult to spend nights together. Though we always made time, usually through face time. But time is time, aye?
I smiled as I laid back down and nuzzled myself back into the comfort of her arms. My roommate Liv was gone for the night, she had gone to visit her boyfriend for the night. Which left me and Inês the dorm. And I definitely wasn’t complaining. Privacy really is a gift.
I sighed softly feeling the warm body of the girl beneath me, her hand gently scratched my back and I listened to the soft sounds of her breathing.
I leaned up and placed a soft kiss on the corner of her lips, I watched as the girls lips twitched trying not to become a smile. It was obvious she was trying to pretend to be asleep and failing miserably.
I giggle and reach my hand up to caress her cheek brushing a few of the stray pieces of hair away. I felt her warm face against my hand as she leaned into it, the soft smile melting onto her lips.
“Morning love,” I giggle as she peels her eyes open. She not the most alert person in the morning usually the first 10 minutes of her day was spent annoyed at the fact she was an awake and acting as if she couldn’t move before she became herself again.
She wasn’t really alert at night either. She was definitely the most adorable at night, she was giggly, and kinda of devious to be honest. But when is she not.
My eyes scanned her tired face. She looked so cute. Messy hair from sleeping fell over her face as her tired eyes met mine.
Her hand tipped my chin upwards pulling me to kiss her lips. I quickly kissed back with little hesitation. She rotated from her side to lay on her back, hands resting on my hips forcing me to sit on her lap as I kissed the girl. Again Im not complaining. Definitely not.
I pulled away laying my head on her chest. I sighed as I nuzzled myself into her, her hand resting under my shirt on my back. Her large hand rubbing it softly.
I couldn’t help but think of how soft her hands were against my skin. How the sound of her breathing calmed me. Or the way my heart fluttered as she kissed my head. After half a year of dating it still shocked me how she made me feel.
“I’m tired,” I mutter closing my eyes a drowsy feeling still fogging my mind. Though I knew I wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep especially now that I’d woken up Nesh. I hear her scoff and laugh her hand gently squeezing my hip.
“Hey no,” she said her voice thick with sleep making her accent extra strong. “You just woke me up. Going back to sleep is mean.” She said lifting my head to look at her. God she’s actual perfection.
“I know. Im joking.” I laugh as I try my first attempt at getting up. Of course in Nesh’s world that would never be happening.
“No stay here.” She murmured holding my hips gently as she tugged me back. She wasn’t a big as most of her teammates but lord she was strong.
“We gotta get ready. No just rotting in bed all day.” I laugh, I place another kiss on her lips before pulling away and pushing myself of the bed and forced my feet to touch the coarse dorm carpet.
I looked at Inês laying seemingly in defeat a loud sigh leaving her mouth, both arms throw to the side in a cross like position. Her eyes are closed but the peak open slightly as I laugh.
“You’re so dramatic” I laugh, gently hitting her stomach with the sleeve of the hoodie hoodie I was going to pull on.
It was cold in the dorm. It was so much more comfortable when I was laying with Nesh. But I can’t go back on my word, I did know how to get her up though.
“I’m gonna hop in the shower wanna join?” I ask. There was no point in asking really, if she even heard the sound of the shower she’d be there.
And I was right. I heard her feet hit the ground as she dashed over to me a goofy smile on her face. I laughed and walked over to the shower her hands on my hips as she began to lift my shirt.
I turned on the shower and turned to face her, she smiled giddily as she looked at me.
“You’re a dork,” I laugh pulling off my shirt, her eyes instantly glued to my chest and she nodded. “No funny business, ok ma’am?” She nods but didn’t really seem to hear me. Her eyes look back into mine, her brown eyes were blown wide.
“No funny business. You got it baby.” She repeated though I could tell she wasn’t listening in the slightest, her hands glued to my hips as she gently pushed me towards the shower.
I laughed as I pulled off the sleep shorts I had been wearing and flung them across the bathroom. When I looked back up Nesh was squirming out of her own clothes.
“Hurry up,” she huffs at me as she pulls her shirt off, like she isn’t the one still changing. I laugh and step into the shower closing the curtain.
Inês joins me a second later her arms wrapping around my waist as she lazily rests her head on my shoulder. I smile feeling the comfort of her arms as well as the warm water against your skin. After a moment my girlfriend decides to complain.
“Your hogging all the warm water,” she mutters pressing her self against me to ‘get more warm water’
I laugh and turn around wrapping my arms around her and pulling her under the warm water. She looks up at me and smiles.
“Better?” I ask moving her hair from her face. How does this girl always manage to have her hair covering her face. She nods and rests her head on my chest.
My hands gently scratch up and down her back, we stand there for a few minutes until we decide we actually should shower which is much more complicated with two people than movies make it out to be.
Eventually we get out of the shower, both of our skin slightly redder due to the fact I insist the water is too cold unless it’s cranked up all the way.
“You ok?” I ask Inês cupping her cheek. She sat on the bed in her towel seemingly dazed.
“Yeah. I just don’t know how you shower so hot. I’m dying.” She says looking at me with a frazzled expression. I laugh and kiss her head before grabbing some clothes to change into.
I change and decide to hop on TikTok live for a bit while I get ready. It about ten minutes into the live when Inês walks in, she wraps her arms around my waist and buries her head into my neck. I laugh seeing a comment from KK.
“Neshy being whipped per usual 🙄” I smile and laugh at the comment, and looked towards Inês who was practically sleeping in the crook of my neck
“KK says your whipped how do you feel about that?” I ask lifting her head up to see the camera.
“She’s just jealous for real.” She mutters before putting her head back. I laugh and scratch her head gently before going back to doing my make up.
“Nesh they want you to say hi,” I tell her as I read many comments telling her to do so.
“Hi live,” Nesh says lifting her head, she slides out from her spot and goes to sit on the closed toilet to watch from afar. And by afar I mean like 2 feet away.
After a few minutes of her just sitting there I leaned over and kissed her lips. A little bit of the pink lips gloss I had just put on being left on her lips.
“I got some lips gloss on you,” I laugh wiping the corners of her mouth.
“Now we’re both baddies,” She joked smacking her lips together. I smile and walk back over my mirror where my phone was propped up.
“Ok guys so give us recommendations on where we should go for brunch.” I ask as I curl my eyelashes. I watched the comments rolling in.
“How does pancakes sound?” I ask Nesh seeing a comment about a pancake restaurant not too far from campus.
“Mmm no I want somthing not sweet,” she says. I nod and continue scrolling through the comments.
“Biscuit place?” I say turning to her. Me personally I could never say no to a breakfast sandwich on fresh biscuits and I knew Nesh couldn’t either. I look over to see her nodding and smiling at me.
“Sounds perfect.” She says standing up and wrapping her arms around my waist again. I decided now would be a good time to end the live.
The second it ended Inês had her arms around me and her lips placing kisses across my face. I smiled feeling the soft kisses on my skin. Today was gonna be good.
#ines bettencourt#uconn wbb#uconn women’s basketball#paige bueckers#kk arnold#nika muhl#inês bettencourt
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