#and am pretty convinced that she’d get a lot of hate.

[serpentface]

Oh yeah I meant to ask, to what extent does social paranoia/self-surveillance/Complexes/etc. affect Janeys & Brakul’s relationship, or their attitudes toward one another/themselves? I remember something written about them not engaging in penetrative sex in relation to Wardi taboos on bodily integrity, which, if not just happening to coincide with personal preference, sounds potentially pretty fraught. (Maybe excessively paranoid, but I want to clarify that this isn’t necessarily a Horny Question)

Not a horny question but as usual my answer is going to be excessively long and detailed so get ready.

Anyway yeahhhh it’s pretty fraught. The bottom line is that they love each other and are also mad horny about it with only a limited number of outlets, which only adds stress to an already stressful situation. They are fully aware that they love each other and there's no 'no homo'ing their way out of this one, but ARE kind of in denial about there being a sexual component to their relationship (which is partly bolstered by the Wardi view on sexuality only considering Full Penetration to actually be 'sex', and they aren't doing that, sooooo....).

With regards to paranoia/self surveillance....

Both of them share a fairly equal concern about status and honor. They are both fully in agreement that many aspects of their relationship have to be secret and that both need to uphold a normative life for high status individuals. The threat of public shaming is a very real concern, and they have killed people over it (duels over slander and impugned honor are legal in some contexts, Brakul extralegally beat a guy to death for it once).

Brakul personally most concerned about other people, and is compelled to avoid doing anything in public that could even be construed as romantic in nature. Wardi cultural norms permit men to be physically affectionate with male friends (kissing on the cheek is a common greeting) but Brakul is pretty hardline Bro Do Not Even Touch Me In Public. He has very few compunctions about anything done in private so long as he doesn't specifically feel emasculated by it.

Janeys is heavily religious and strongly concerned about curses and spiritual pollution (all believers in this faith share this basic tendency, but it tends to be of more pressing psychological concern to the upper classes via impact on social status and honor). His core personal concerns are on the spiritual end of things- belief in curses and spiritual pollution is a very real motivating factor in this culture. Anything he does that is conventionally understood as emasculating or spiritually violating, he has to rationalize and self-justify away.

There’s a tendency among the upper class to imagine the Commoner having a poor, uneducated, and superficial understanding of the religion, and philosophical debates on the nuances of religion is considered an ideal leisure pastime among the educated upper class. So part of Janeys’ self-justification cycle is usually like “I am very smart and knowledgeable, and now that I’m thinking about it the idea that [xyz gay as shit behavior] is spiritually polluting is superstition of the common rabble and missing all the Subtle Nuances”.

It’s kind of like Janeys will laboriously mental gymnastics his way through his various concerns and eventually be like “I Have Discovered That Giving Blowjobs Is Not Spiritually Polluting, (And In Fact Is Very Masculine???) I Will Analyze This Further” and Brakul is like “Ok cool not polluting okay awesome that’s great ok let’s go let's go letsgoletsgoletsgo”

This is a long, slow process. They have been in a relationship where they both want to fuck each other stupid for over a decade without any of that happening, instead just very slowly escalating while being very frustrated about it the whole time.

Sworn brotherhoods such as theirs are upheld by an annual ritual involving bloodletting (the palms are cut, blood drained into wine and mutually imbibed, other stuff happens). It’s a lengthy ceremony and partly supervised by a priest. The first escalation is they started doing this like, monthly on their own. It feels intimate and scratches an itch for physical and psychological closeness.

This escalated into performing a ‘’’condensed’’’ version of the ritual, which is really just them sitting around and cutting each other with a razor and licking up the blood (while perhaps half-assedly reciting the associated prayers). The underlying factor is they always need to have some excuse that does not ‘shame’ them- in this case, they have decided that their frequent exchange of blood keeps their bond soooo strong and powerful and that they're like, the best sworn brothers ever.

This blood shit is UNQUESTIONABLY sexual for them and is a physical outlet for sexual frustration. And it does eventually escalate to them finally getting off (‘weird blood shit’ was their first base, ‘doing weird blood shit and frantically dry humping to completion and then not talking about it’ was their second, ‘kissing on the mouth’ was like, 6th)

This all was worsened by the genius decision of having Brakul knock up Hibrides, who is Janeys’ wife. Janeys has no attraction to women (and also probable fertility issues) so he never succeeded himself. She had passed the expected childbearing age and is utterly miserable in this relationship and was kinda like “uhhh if you won’t let me fucking DIVORCE YOUR ASS you’d better figure something out because you’re shaming ME”, and since sworn brothers effectively ‘share’ wives (IN THEORY this is just a commitment to support your brothers’ wife and children in the case of his death) they came to an agreement that this was NOT Janeys being cuckolded and shamed, as long as no one else finds out.

The lingering after effects of this decision are one of the primary strains on their relationship on a whole number of levels, one of which is Janeys now being intensely jealous of Hibrides for ‘getting to’ fuck Brakul, and that she has had a form of closeness with him that Janeys can never have (not even just the sex but like, conception itself). The feeling of having a metaphysical bond with someone who he sees as stronger than himself makes him feel more secure, and the sense that someone has gotten in the way of that and experienced something 'deeper' is very distressing for him. Brakul also kind of wants to be a father and really, really, really wants a relationship with his bastard children (something which both Janeys and Hibrides prevent him from doing) which really wears on him.

On a personal level, Janeys swings between feeling smugly justified about everything (he's only hiding it because everyone around him is stupid and wouldn't get The Nuances) and like, Oh God I've fucked up so bad I am shamed beyond recognition. Why did you let me do this to myself, this is your fault, you made me like this, etc etc etc. (This is especially the case when he suffers any unusual misfortune, seeing it as signs of a curse).

Brakul can usually weather this out (and is also very good at logically assuaging his concerns), but it's very draining on him. He shares the core belief in spiritual pollution, but he doesn't share the experience of actually Feeling dirty or shamed by things only they know about. They get into a lot of fights (not necessarily explicitly about all this, but it's an underlying tension) and Brakul often just deals with it by up and leaving for days on end until Janeys is miserable enough to not be upset. Brakul also has some alcohol abuse issues and could be diagnosed with clinical depression (not entirely because of this, but it doesn't help).

Another bottom line is just like, after over a decade in vehement denial that they are fucking each other, the notion of 'actually fucking each other' has kind of an outsized weight to it. Objectively (BY WARDI CULTURAL STANDARDS) they have ENTIRELY and thoroughly shamed each other and are riddled with spiritual pollution, and taking it up the ass couldn't make it any worse so might as well. But they haven't quite got there.

So yeah this is kind of all over the place but I think this answers the question???????

[wandasgf]

ANDROMEDA. mdni. 18+.

pairing: wanda maximoff + stepdaughter!reader

summary: all wanda wants is to relax, why does that seem so hard?

warnings: implied cheating, stepcest, no explicit sexual content, mommy kink, age gap, alcohol consumption, implied sexual content

wc: 2.1kish

It didn't start out like this, you swear. You didn't start out wanting to ruin your own father's marriage so that you could be with your new step mother. You used to feel bad about it, really, you did, but it's been about a year now and it's not like your father deserves Wanda anyway. They’d been married for about a year and a half and you swear you’ve never even seen them hold hands. He was always on business trips, you rarely saw him. It used to make you sad, never seeing your father, but distance creates disdain.

That’s pretty much how you found yourself in your best friend, Kate’s, bedroom, laying on the bed with your head hanging off and staring at the, upside down from your point of view, poster of some celebrity Kate was obsessed with. You think her name is Hailee? You don't know, but anyway, you were thinking about how you were going to convince Wanda to stay at home with you while your father was on yet another trip. Usually Wanda wouldn’t go with your father, but apparently he’s going to Milan and she really wants to go shopping there. And aside from the obvious reason you didn’t want Wansa to go, you really did hate being in that big house alone.

“I don’t know, man. Maybe you should just let her go on the trip, the woman never gets to see her husband, she probably misses him.” Kate shrugs, looking away from her phone to see your reaction. “Ughh, I just don’t understand what she sees in him, I’m obviously better and right here.” You sit up from your position on Kate’s bed and turn towards Kate, sitting cross-legged. Kate sighs in response, “Y/N, you know I love you, but I hate to break it to you, as hot of a milf as she is, and she is believe me, you are still her step daughter and she can’t exactly just… divorce your father to be with you. I mean, I totally get where you’re coming from and I am not gonna stop you from fucking her, but you’ve gotta be realistic here.”

She would be all for this relationship if it weren’t for the very simple and very messy fact that Wanda was married to your father. It was either going to end in heartbreak for you or you completely severing ties with your father to be with Wanda. And while the latter wouldn’t be awful, it’s not like your father was the most present, it just kind of counted on you and Wanda staying together which, as much as she wanted to believe it would, Kate was unsure would happen.

And it’s not that Kate didn’t think it was possible for you to have a long lasting relationship, it’s just that she was afraid lust was clouding your judgment and she’s not sure you actually have any sort of emotional connection…. Ah, but that’s enough worrying, it wasn’t exactly Kate’s strong suit and it was unlikely that you would be successful in your mission to woo Wanda… As if you hadn’t already been messing around with each other, but that didn’t really matter right now.

“Maybe you’re right… I don’t know. I just know that she’d be better off here with me. It’s not like she’d even get to see him a lot while they’re there. He’ll be in meetings or whatever.” You roll your eyes, already annoyed at the thought of Wanda thinking she’d get to have a nice trip and it being ruined by your father. You know you could treat Wanda better than him. “And hey,” Kate perks up, her eyes twinkling and a smile sneaking onto her lips, “If they’re both gone you can throw a party.”

—

Wanda was annoyed. Extremely annoyed, actually. Maybe even a little bit angry, but she wasn’t going to dwell on that feeling. This was supposed to be a nice trip for her, a vacation of sorts, but no, of course it wasn’t. Nothing was ever a nice vacation in the presence of Mr. Bigshot CEO Jarvis. It’s her fault, really, falling for his charming little facade and then for some god forsaken reason deciding to marry him. It’s not like she can go back in time to change it though, so she better not think about it too much, and he’s rich so that’s a plus she supposes.

At least he had a cute daughter, but that’s besides the point, she’s letting her mind drift again.

She’d been waiting for him to get back from whatever the hell kind of meeting he was at, she didn’t care, so that they could go get dinner at the restaurant down the street from the condo they were staying at. But as always, he texted her to say he’d be running a little bit late. That text was sent two hours ago and she’s not sure how much waiting she has left in her. She’d give him five more minutes before she got on a plane and left without a word.

She had just finished zipping up her suitcase when she heard the door open, what impeccable timing that stupid man had. Sighing and looking towards the door, Wanda attempted to give a somewhat genuine smile. “Sweetheart!!” Slurred the clearly drunk man as he stumbled into the room, he reeked of alcohol and it almost made Wanda gag. “You’re late. Extremely late. Again.” She crossed her arms over her chest as she stared at him, clearly unimpressed. “Oh, come on. Me and the boys just went out for a few drinks after retro… retrofits!”

He meant retrospectives.

“Yeah, I’m sure you did. Well, you can have a nice time here in Milan, I am going home.” Wanda could put up with a lot of things, but this was just ridiculous. He had never been punctual, but it had usually been because his meetings actually were running late, not whatever this was. “Home? No, it’s called Seta.” He clearly thought she meant the restaurant which she was no longer planning on going to. “No. I am getting on a plane and I am going home. But please, don’t let that stop you from enjoying your time here.” She laughed, mostly at how pathetic she thought it was that she expected this trip to be any different than how it was at home. And with that, she was out the door and walking down to the lobby to try and figure out what the best way to the airport was and if she could just take some sort of personal jet of her husband’s to get home.

—

The party was in full swing, music blasting, drunk 20 somethings everywhere and you were in the center of it. You always did like attention. It took you and Kate about two days to plan and figure out who to invite, but it went about as well as you had expected. Instead of having a somewhat laid back party, Kate decided at the last minute that she would text out an invite to all of their friends and then also let them text their friends about it. So now there were about 100 people in your house and backyard.

Unfortunately, Kate was just about the most social person you have ever met. Somehow, though, nothing has been broken yet, but there are way too many red plastic cups on the ground. Kate is less drunk than you are, but by no means sober and you have��� well… had enough alcohol to stop you from drinking for at least the next two weeks. Waking up tomorrow would not be pleasant.

“Hey Y/N!” Kate is practically shouting over the music, “Are we expecting anyone else? A car just pulled up!” She’s pretty sure everyone is here, even Nico had somehow convinced Illyana to take a break from studying (brooding in her room) to come to the party. Which is a miracle in itself. Speaking of those two, she hasn’t seen them in a while, she hopes for your sake they aren’t fucking somewhere in the house. “I don’t think so, but I’ll go greet them anyway!!” You slur, smiling excitedly. “Y/N I don’t think-” Kate doesn’t get to finish her sentence before you’re skipping away towards the front door. “Okay.” Kate nods to herself before walking away to go find wherever Peter was, the last time she saw her she was playing beer pong with the other Peter, Gamora’s boyfriend Peter. Something about battle of the Peters.

You stumble out the front door, squinting to try and see who just pulled up. It was dark out and you weren't wearing your glasses. Oh, and being incredibly drunk didn’t help. You gasp when you see who it is. “Wands!!” Your eyes widen in excitement and you run towards her, tripping over your own feet in the process. You didn’t usually call Wanda by the nickname, but you didn’t really care right now. Wanda is quick to stop you from falling, cursing under her breath when she realizes how drunk you are. You would be a handful in the morning.

And then she finally hears the loud music and the voices and slowly looks around to see all of the clearly drunk people currently on her, well, your father's property. “Y/F/N.” Her voice is stern and it catches you so off guard you almost stumble backwards, your eyes wide. You pout, upset that the first thing Wanda does when she sees you when she gets home is be upset with you. You probably would have fallen if it weren’t for Wanda’s grip on your arms.

“What the hell is this?” She’s not sure why you throwing a party makes her so angry, it usually wouldn’t. Maybe it’s the built up anger from your father bailing on their dinner date to get drunk and the assumption that she’d be able to come home and relax with you. Or maybe it’s the thought of you throwing this big of a party while she’s not even in the country and something bad happening to you. You never did handle alcohol very well, despite drinking like there’s no tomorrow. In any case, she was quite angry.

“It’s a party, silly. Can’t you tell?” You giggle as your sadness melts away, leaning back into Wanda’s hold. “Yes, I know what a party–” Wanda stops herself, sighing, it didn’t matter anyway, You clearly weren't understanding why or that she was upset. She thinks for a couple of seconds and instead she changes tactics, it wouldn’t do any good to make you upset with everyone around and no one would remember any behavior that seemed odd for a step mother and her step daughter, they were all too drunk.

She smiles sweetly, reaching up to stroke your cheek, “Why don’t you go tell everyone to go home, the party is over, okay?” You pout in response, looking up slightly at the older woman, “But I don’t want them to go home.” You practically whine, slumping in Wanda’s arms. Of course this wasn’t going to be easy, you always did love a party. “I know you don’t, but it’s time for everyone to go home, sweetheart. Don't you want to spend some time with me now that I’m home?” Wanda fakes a pout, looking down at you.

Well, you did want to spend time with Wanda…

“But can't you just have fun at the party with me? We can have fun at the party together!!” You beam, no longer upset. Wanda was going to have whiplash with the way alcohol affected your emotions. “Sweet girl, you're so cute, but Mommy wants to spend some time with just the two of us.” She moves her thumb to tug at your bottom lip. “Wouldn't you like that?”

Your cheeks heat up and you feel a familiar heat in your stomach, suddenly feeling a little shy in front of Wanda. She doesn't usually call herself that unless you're alone. “Mhm… I can tell everyone to go home. I’ll get Kate to help and I’ll be so quick, I promise.” Wanda surprises you by leaning down to press a soft kiss against your lips. “Be quick, sweetheart. I’ve missed you.”

“So quick!!” And you almost trip over your feet with how quickly you run to go get Kate. Wanda watches fondly, a small smile on her lips. You're so cute, hopefully you won't get all upset in the morning when she makes you clean everything up.

[ouchthathurts]

❝ 𝐃𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐦𝐞? 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐭! ❞

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 (𝐬) ⋮ Daisuke x AFAB! Reader

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⋮ 3.1k

𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 ⋮ 1 | 2 | 3

𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ⋮ Finally meeting the nurse!

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 ⋮ Cross-Posted on AO3 | Vomit Mentioned | Anya being Anya

𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 ⋮ APOLOGIES AGAIN! I DROPPED FROM A 95 TO A 25 IN TWO OF MY CLASSES. SO SORRY THIS IS VERY LATE AGAIN! WINTER BREAK TIL EARLY FEBRUARY SO ILL BE UPDATING AT LEAST ONCE OR TWICE A WEEK!

There’s something about the nurse aboard the Tuplar, she’s sweet, not sickeningly, but in a beautiful moderation. The way you’re given a piece of candy for completion of a simple task and even more so envelopes you when the day is rough. You’re not surprised by her nature; however, you are surprised by her knowledge.

You won’t lie to yourself that Jimmy had definitely convinced you that Anya was someone who tried too hard at things “She’d never be good at.” You feel for her, Jimmy setting these unrealistic expectations of what his own needs and wants that he desires from the group. 

Anya…Musume? Maybe it was a lack of attention you paid in school, but God, you couldn't read cursive to save your life. Looking at her name card, you could tell who she was. She was the nurse on deck and who you'd be spending your time with. Luckily for you, you'd given this time to really take in your surroundings, and by taking your surroundings, be stuck with Jimmy for a majority of the duration of your trip.

It peeved you to say the least, and you couldn't help but hate how much Jimmy was going to be around you, and how much this was definitely going to affect your relationship given the situation.

Your eyes laid on Anya, she was gorgeous, in fact, one of the most prettiest girls in the world. She honestly reminded you a bit of Daisuke’s older sister, she's not meek when she talks to you. In fact, you watch as Anya takes over Jimmy, she's a lot more carefree than Jimmy made her out to be, passionate about helping you, Jimmy also calls that her hellbent need to be in charge, and she tells you about how you should join her and Daisuke for a game, and which Jimmy will tell you that they’re both childish ego maniacs who have never told no in their life.

“They keep trying, reaching for something that they know they'll never reach, but thanks to their parents' big ambition and big push, they think they can accomplish the world. They don't know hard work. Failing 8 times? It's obvious she's not trying hard enough. Daisuke? It’ll just be inheritance.”

You hated how little time you were able to spend with Anya. It honestly pissed you off how fucking pushy Jimmy was. It was irritating to be around somebody so annoyingly negative, pessimistic, ignorant to the world around them, only thinking of how things can only get worse. 

It wasn't even you who told him to go away, it was Anya. The dark-haired woman speaks to you. There's a big, chipper smile on her face, and it's radiant, like a halo behind her, and she's looking to you like Mother Teresa. “I would love some help from you if you don't mind. I know Jimmy is rather busy since he is Copiloting and I am pretty sure Curly's been talking about needing some help in the cockpit for a minute. He came in here early with some injuries. I was hoping I would find Jimmy to tell him to go help Curly. It gives you the time to really look into the nurse's office and get to know more about the area, I'd be happily able to inform you while Jimmy's gone.” Jimmy scoffs. Obviously, he can't even help the idea of you wanting to do something else rather than be around him.

“Well,” “I’d love to, Anya!” 

Jimmy's eyes as it hits your gaze but Anya's there, and she's tall and proud and she doesn't give a shit. She's like this bright flashlight, beating down on a shadow. “You’re our only hope!” Anya jokes. There's a soft giggle in her voice. Jimmy leaves in a huff and it honestly brings you more joy to even be out of the area. She watches as your soldiers fall in relief and she can't help but just feel for you in those seconds as she watches you. 

“What a hardass, no?” You let out another sigh, “You’re fucking telling me.” Bursts in the laughter. It's the same boisterous laughter that you hear in the game room while her and Daisuke are going at it.

It's nice, you're not surprised Curly feels so at peace around her, she's like a garden, if you're gonna be honest, with all the pastels surrounding you and the smell of the nature hitting your nose. It's sweet, not nauseous, not irritating to the skin. Everything is soft and the temperature is perfect.

“Well, tell me about yourself,” she says. She takes a seat on the other side of the desk, and you follow in suit as you just can't wait to talk to this woman. “What do you like to do on the ship? What makes you smile? Why are you here? How'd you throw up on Jimmy without him making a bigger scene?” Anya's quick quiz questions. She's very inquisitive.

You look around her desk to see the small doodles on sticky notes, the many different books on psychology and mental health, and the personal notebook on her desk decorated with old worn-down stickers that are scratched up and fading in color.

You try to answer every question with suave, you hope your cool in her eyes, “Honestly, I like sleeping on this ship. I never realized how exhausting everything would be, especially with such a hard ass like Jimmy. I mean, Jesus, man this guy can't do anything without being such a bitch! He's always trying to make me do more and more and more like me doing the basics isn't enough. And he acts like this is like something I've done 1000 times but I'm literally doing only for the first time. And I can't believe it. He's just so aggravating, you know?”

Anya's listening earnestly, and it's riveting to have somebody genuinely sit there and listen to you. There are no accusatory glances, there's no language that has any type of anger or hindrance towards your story or how you feel. It's fully allowing you to be in the moment and be in your emotions.

You’re wondering why it’s so easy to talk to Anya when you struggle talking to anyone else, is it always this easy to talk to strangers? It’s probably why your always on online chatrooms, like the time your mom caught you on one at 3AM and almost tore you a new one. 

Anya hits you with the simple responses, “Mhm.” “Right.” “Oh my god.” In her tone, it's laid back, it makes you feel casual, and it makes you feel amazing. “What makes me smile? Honestly, I really couldn't tell you, but I promise you that the reason? That's probably on this ship, actually.”

Anya's ears perk up, and she's most definitely way more into this than you thought she'd be. Not like she wasn't into it before, but it's definitely something that's alarmed her.  “On this ship?” There’s a hum in her voice as she playfully smirks, your bite your tongue as punish before shaking your exposed palms at her to try and lower the attention to your wording.

“No, not like that, just–” Anya just dismissively hums at you, she knows something you don’t and it’s eating you alive, “I’m really only on this ship for my mom? She wants to make sure I get better opportunities when I get back. But honestly, I just can't wait to move out of this house. It's exhausting. Everything is just so exhausting, but I think it's gonna get better. Once I'm out.” Anya nods, “Once you’re out!”

You smile at this. There's something so sweet about this, thus you continue on. “Honestly, I didn't really mean to throw up on Jimmy, it was a lot in the moment and honestly it was just so icky being around him. I felt like there was hundreds of thousands of maggots just swirling around in my stomach acid and they were becoming more than my stomach acid could take and not enough was being burnt down and I just felt it just plummeting back in my throat and I just couldn't fathom being around that man anymore.” 

Oh, fuck.

The look on Anya's face is caring but there's definitely a hint of anger, irritation even, and just grief for you specifically. Anya feels for you, she honestly can't stand being around Jimmy in the minutes she had to meet him. He was just nothing more than somebody who was just super-duper grumpy with Daisuke and Swansea make little jokes about the bitter man.

Anya stops joking with Curly after making one joke and Jimmy hearing it from Curly and thus Curly mentioning Anya and thus Jimmy saying lot of things very much out of line that led to their dismissive interactions with another unless under a professional lens.

“It’s just treating him if he needs it and making sure I do the psych evals, other than that, he has no reason to be around me.” 

You respect Anya in that regard: She's very much self-oriented, if it’s hurting her, it’s out of her life like that, she snaps, and you notice the shimmer from the glitter on her pink almond nails. “Do you get them done often?”

Anya raised a brow, you point to her hands put them out to cradle her as she allows you to get a closer look, “Oh, I do ‘em myself. I used to do my mom's when I lived at home.” That’s when Anya turned your hands around, your hands were fried from the manual labor that Jimmy put you through, she winces but a light bulb above her makes her shine like a descending Angel. “I don't know if you're against it, and if you are it’s cool, but I'd really love if you let me work on your nails. If not, it's completely cool. But you know, if you let me, I'd be like super happy!” There’s a cheekiness to Anya, she’s unapologetically herself, never in a mean way but uplift others. A smile on her face, it’s subtle but there, “I’d be super happy too, if you did my nails.” Anya gives you an even bigger smile, before she slowly pulls in with a flutter of her lashes, “Oh, yeah?” You giggle at her nature, “Oh, most definitely.” 

The two of you share a giggle before she unfortunately has to dismiss you, “Studying sucks, but I don’t think my gut can take more chili fries.” Anya playfully sighs as she waves you out.

There’s a pep in your step as you walk, this pep however hushes once you hear Curly and Jimmy talking in another room, “And she completely dismissed me, as if I didn’t exist!” You listen in closely.

Obviously, they're talking about you, so you should hear it. Because they won't tell you and they never will. Maybe that's your own fault, but the more you listen to Jimmy complain, the more you wonder if Curly even cares at this point.

“Well, you didn’t really take the time to really address Anya, y’know?” He's dismissive to the fact that Curly could even be right in this scenario. With how he's been carrying himself this whole time, he's assumed that Anya should just respect him regardless.

You have no choice but to really listen to him regardless since this is really all you really have, and you'd have to hear about him talking shit about everybody later anyways. “Even then, she should respect me, I am the co-captain.” Curly sighs, “Well, you don’t really act like a nice co-captain.” There’s a stifle in his voice, a choked out laugh escapes Jimmy and you can feel the spit hit your face from memory.

“Oh, you mean be you?”  “No. I mean be more likeable, try with the others, all you do is sit here cooped up in this section of the ship barking orders at…”  Curly backpedals, your peeved that he’s not saying more, Jimmy repeats your name, you feel your back straighten at the sound.

“Listen, what goes on with the training has nothing to do with you or anyone else on this ship. Besides, you put me in charge of them, you think I’m gonna sit there and let my protege get soft like Swansea’s?” There’s an eye roll from the blond, “What are you even talking about? Swansea has Daisuke study, and he gives him tests on the material.” 

Another sigh leaves Curly, you hear those beat up shoes hit the floor as he adjusts himself before he speaks again, “Y’know what your problem is? You sit here and you constantly compare yourself to others, and when they're not exactly like you, you wanna sit there and make them feel bad for being themselves.”

'Jimmy says nothing, your shocked by that fact alone, “I got you this job because it’s easy money, Lord knows your situation before wasn’t any better than this, and instead of trying to get along with others or at least being cordial, you’re trying to self-destruct when things don’t go your way.”  

There’s a drag in the air, you peek a bit to see that Jimmy huffs and his head hangs low, he’s like a child being caught digging in the candy jar.

Curly looks irritated, it's a very different light you see him in as its rare you ever seen him disgruntled, “I really am screwing this up. I mean, have I really not been trying at all? I feel like I have. Have I really not been changing to begin with?” Jimmy mutters to himself, loud enough for you and Curly to hear since the sound of a foot echoed throughout these halls.

Curly’s features soften, “Maybe you’re right, I’m not cut out for this stuff, I should’ve just stated back.” He sighs before pulling Jimmy in for a hug. “We’ve known each other since forever, I don’t want to see you struggle like you did before, this is how you lost your last job, remember?” Jimmy doesn’t even respond, he nods with his head in his friend’s shoulder before Curly has a big smile on his and he pats his friend’s back.

“I just want what’s best for you, Jimmy.” Curly says as he pulls away, Jimmy nods again, “Yeah, I know.” It’s like he’s reflecting on himself almost, before Jimmy begins to fold in on himself, “God, I really am screwing this up.” The brunette then puts his head in his hands leaving Curly to quickly comfort the man, “Hey, you’re doing your best, I’m not expecting you to get it overnight.”  

You're in awe by them, you wonder if you should do something or at least doing something more than just watching them right now. You clear your throat causing the two to look back to you, Jimmy straightens up, that remorseful look on his face now a bittered expression that was the sourness that your existence caused him. Curly perks up, “Hey there.” Jimmy says your name, you fix your posture, “Jimmy. Curly. How’s it hanging?” “Was doing a lot better earlier.” 

God, you wanna punch this guy so fucking bad.

“Ah, I get that. I heard from Swansea that Daisuke was sniffling earlier, you probably caught it.” The man raises a brow, “How can I catch it? I only saw him once today.” You also a raise brow, “Y’know, like pathogens? He sneezes and it’s all in the air now.” Curly nods in agreement, “Yeah, we are trapped on this ship so it would be hard for something like that to just disappear in the air.” Jimmy nods alongside him, “You’re right, Curly.” 

You allow the situation roll off your back, like a duck to water, you don't let it affect you and you're glad you don't. Now Curly and Jimmy are just looking at you before Curly perks up with a little question, “I mean, didn’t you throw up earlier? You probably got it from Daisuke.”

Now you're here stuck thinking about the fact that Daisuke has such a disgusting implication of you.

“Oh, yeah, probably.” That’s when Curly looks towards Jimmy, his eyes dart towards you and then back towards Jimmy. “Maybe you should turn in, it’s been a long day, and I need you to handle the challenges for tomorrow.” Gee, thanks. You smile, eagerly, “Thank you so much, Jimmy. I really appreciate this.” You dismiss yourself because what else are you doing around these two? You don't need to be around them longer than you need to be, and just being around these two just makes you feel off. 

You quickly make your way to your room. While walking around, you however discover one of the room’s door opened, It's not in your nature to really peak. The Jimmy and Curly thing was definitely you just trying to learn more about why he was such a douchebag, and you didn't really learn much to be honest with you. 

So maybe peeking isn't gonna really help you in this situation—

“Hey, come in here, you.” The only feminine voice you'll be met with on this trip. You turn your head after walking by the door without looking, and there you're met with Anya, she's out of uniform some pajama bottoms and an oversized shirt, you notice the face on it– “You like Love Island?” Anya raises a brow, “You know Love Island?” You nod your head, “My mom’s really into it, sometimes I just watch it with her while I’m making food.”

“Cool.” 

“Yeah.”

There’s silence between the two of you, it’s nerving given that she just has this unphased expression on her face, her half-lidded eyes with a small smile that showed how happy she was to be around you had only made you worry more as you believe your overstaying your welcome by standing around her. You try to dismiss yourself—

“You wanna come watch it with me? I got a bunch of downloaded episodes.” 

You perk up at the question, not like you have anything better to do, you’re not sick and Jimmy just let you go. Anya tilts her head, awaiting your response, “So?” Your eyes widen, “Oh, yeah, of course.” The smile on Anya’s face got bigger, “Yeah, come on in.” 

©ouchthathurts please don't translate, claim as yours, redistribute and/or plagiarize in any way. likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[gloomysoup]

before we get too old

rating: T+ | word count: 3,563 | tags: major character death, angst, hurt no comfort, canon-typical violence, implied steddie (if you squint) | ao3

*title is from Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol*

i am so happy to FINALLY be sharing this fic with y'all. I've been sitting on this one for MONTHS, and surprisingly kept it pretty secret. I wanna give quick thanks to my friends, Ro and Seph, for helping me edit over the last several weeks and convincing me it's actually good enough to post. They are godsends, I swear. And of course a special thank you to my spouse @estrellami-1 for having full confidence in me and always being my cheerleader 💜 I hope y'all enjoy this fic (and don't hate me too much for what I've done here)

It happened so fast. His attention was away from Mike and Will for maybe a handful of seconds at most, turned just long enough to scan the area behind him for movement. All it took was a few seconds though. When he turned back around, a demogorgon had lept toward the two young teens, and Steve Harrington was blocking them.

There wasn’t even enough time for Steve to raise his bat. He didn’t stand a chance. He shoved the two boys behind him so hard that Will tripped and fell. Mike was frozen on the spot. The creature had a hold on Steve before anyone could even blink. Its claws dug into his skin as its face opened up, sinking sharp teeth into tender muscle and tearing. Steve gritted his teeth to keep from screaming too loudly, his head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut. The others regained their senses and shot at the demogorgon, forcing it to release Steve and move back far enough for Jonathan to hit it with flames. Steve crumpled to the ground in a pool of his own blood, falling limp like a rag doll, tossed aside by a child who found something more interesting to play with.

The creature was dead. The other groups were scattered, following the plan. This hadn’t been part of it. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Mike and Will stood a few paces away from where Steve laid on the ground, forcing wet, gasping breaths into his lungs through the blood pouring out in droves. Jonathan dropped to his side as soon as he was certain the rest of the area was clear.

“Steve,” he said between quick breaths. He pulled a wad of gauze from his bag, a precaution Nancy had made them all take. Part of him knew, just looking at Steve, that it wasn’t going to be enough. “Hey, you’re gonna be okay, man.”

Steve coughed, blood spilling from his mouth and dripping down the sides of his face. “It- it came outta- outta nowhere, man. I had- had to help- had to keep the kids safe.”

“Yeah, you did. They’re fine, Steve. You protected them.” Jonathan fought the emotions creeping up his throat as he pressed the gauze into the gaping wounds on Steve’s torso. The skin was ripped to shreds. Jonathan could almost convince himself he could see the bones of Steve’s rib cage through all the blood. Steve winced and groaned at the sharp pressure. “I’m sorry. I gotta- I gotta stop the bleeding. It’s a lot of blood.”

“Be better if Nance was here, huh?” Steve tried to laugh, but it just came out weak and strained. It led to another cough, blood spilling everywhere. It was already pooling underneath him, seeping into the ground. “She’d know exactly what to do."

“You’re right, she would. She’s always the one better in a crisis, isn’t she?” Jonathan licked his lips. His hands were coated in blood. It was seeping through the gauze far quicker than he had hoped it would. This was bad. “You’re gonna be okay, Steve. We’re gonna get you outta here, yeah?”

Steve took a few more gasping breaths, his eyes fluttering before drifting behind Jonathan to Mike and Will. His gaze pulled back to Jonathan, dark and dim as he fought for every blood-soaked breath. “You don’t have to lie, man. I- I know it’s bad. I’m not making it out of here, am I?”

Jonathan shook his head. “No, you gotta hang on, okay? We’ll find a way. We’ll get you help, and everything will be fine.” The gauze was completely soaked through. Blood seeped through his fingers, coating his hands in thick, sticky red. He could feel it soaking into the knees of his jeans. He looked over his shoulder. “Mike, Will, I need you to help,” he called. “I need something to stop the bleeding.”

Mike stood stock-still, whole body trembling, but Will seemed to instantly jump into action. He rummaged through their small supply, looking for anything they could use. He found a spare t-shirt and a jacket. It would have to do. They didn't have any other option, and the walkies hadn’t been working this whole time. They had no way of calling the others for help. They were on their own. Will tossed the shirt at his brother, standing just to the side as Jonathan switched out the dark red, dripping gauze for the shirt. It had done nothing to staunch any of the bleeding. Steve had gone pale. Paler than any person ever should be. He was losing too much.

“W- Will, okay?” Steve asked, still fighting for air.

“I’m fine, Steve,” Will answered softly. “We both are. You saved us.”

“That’s- that’s good.” His eyes drifted shut, and Jonathan began to panic. His heart pounded in his chest. His lungs constricted. He couldn't breathe. He needed Steve to make it out of this. He had to save him.

“Hey, hey, no, Steve, you have to stay awake,” he said quickly, pressing one hand to his face and tapping his cheek. He tried to swallow back the bile that wanted to rise at the red it left behind. “I need you to stay awake for me, yeah? You’re gonna be okay, but you can’t close your eyes.”

Steve winced again, his breathing coming shallow and raspy. He was losing so much blood. “R-Robin?”

“She’s coming,” Jonathan promised quickly, not knowing if it was true or not, but also knowing that all he could do now was try to comfort Steve. All he could do was try and reassure him, make this easier on the guy that had sacrificed so much for all of them and never expected anything in return. He just needed to believe that everything was okay. That he would see Robin soon. He still didn't fully understand their relationship, but he knew it was important to both of them. “Robin’s coming, Steve. You just gotta stay with me a little longer. She’ll be here soon.”

“Jonathan,” Will whispered, looking at his brother worriedly. He was crouched on the other side of Steve now, his face pale. Like he knew. He just knew. Jonathan hated that he knew. Will was too young. He shouldn't have to know.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Jonathan said firmly, trying to reassure everyone in a situation that he knew wasn’t going to have a happy ending. What else was he supposed to do?

“Hey- hey, man, I- uh- I’m sorry.” Jonathan put his attention on Steve, not quite sure what he was apologizing for. “All the shit- the shit that I did. Wasn’t cool. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, no, you don’t have to apologize for that stuff. It doesn't matter anymore. I got over it a long time ago. If anything, I should be the one sorry. I’m the one that stole your girlfriend.

Steve tried to laugh again, but it just made him choke up more blood. God, there was so much blood. “Nah, she never really- really loved me. It was always you anyway.” His eyes drifted shut for a moment again, but he was still speaking. “Robin- Robin’s on her way, yeah?”

“She’s coming, Steve. You just gotta keep breathing. She’ll be here soon.”

“You know, she- she’s my best friend. She always- always jokes that we’re soulmates. Platonic with a capital ‘P’.” Steve’s voice was slow and syrupy. Rough. Jonathan hated how slow it sounded.

“Yeah? That’s really cool, man. You deserve someone like that.”

Jonathan just needed to keep him talking. If he was talking, he was alive. The longer he was alive, the more hope they had. Jonathan knew that wasn't actually true, but it's all he could do. Convince himself of lies. Anything to keep from falling apart in front of Mike and Will. They didn't need that. They needed him to be strong.

Steve nodded his head slowly, just barely enough to catch the movement. “I- you’ll tell her I- I love her, right? She’s gotta know. Someone’s gotta tell her.”

“You can tell her yourself.”

He winced, shaking his head. “I think we both know that’s not gonna happen.” Another cough. “Promise me something?”

“No, Steve, you’re gonna be fine. We’re gonna get you out of here.”

“Jon.” His voice was raspy and distant. Jonathan doubted he had much time left. “Take- take care of them for me. Nance especially. Don’t- don’t let her blame herself. Me, Barb. None of it was- was her fault. And Robs. She’s- she’s gonna need someone. You’ve gotta- gotta look out for her for me. Promise you- you’ll be there for them?”

Jonathan nodded quickly. He didn’t have a choice anymore. Any hope that Steve was getting out of there alive was dwindling rapidly. His skin was growing more and more pale and cold from blood loss. His eyes were heavy and dim. His breathing was too shallow. Jonathan knew if he felt for his pulse, it would barely even be there. Too weak to keep pumping blood he didn't have. “Of course I will. I’ll make sure they’re okay. You don't have to worry. I’ve got them.”

“Thanks, man.” Steve took a few breaths and his head lolled over toward Will as he looked at him. He tried to muster a smile, but it was tight and bloody. So red. “You’re a good kid, Will,” he muttered. “You’ve gotta- gotta make sure all you little- little rugrats are looking after each other.”

Will nodded instantly, tear tracks on his cheeks. Jonathan could tell that Will knew. He knew this was it. He watched his little brother choke back a sob.

“Hey, no, you don’ gotta do that. You’ll be okay.”

Mike dropped to his knees next to Will, sobbing harder than Jonathan had ever seen. “You can’t die on us, Steve!” he begged, grabbing the older boy’s cold, clammy hand.

“Mike,” Steve whispered. “You’re gonna be okay.”

“No! No, you can’t! We- we need you!”

“Nah, you guys are strong. You’ll be okay.”

“No, Steve, don’t! I- I’m sorry I was such an asshole to you. I’m sorry. I never should have been like that. You were always there to save us, and I was awful to you!”

The corner of Steve’s lips tugged up slightly as he tried to squeeze Mike’s hand with the little strength he had left. “I know you didn’t mean it. You’re just a kid.”

“That’s not an excuse!”

“I know. I’m not mad. I love all you- you little twerps, okay?”

“Steve, please, don’t go.”

“‘S okay, Mike. Eddie’s waitin’ for me. ‘M not gonna be alone anymore.”

Jonathan looked up and spotted people in the distance. Nancy, Robin, Lucas, and Erica. He stood up instantly, scrambling to his feet. “Nance! Robin!” he yelled as loudly as he could, his voice breaking as he realized he was crying now too. He waved his arms frantically, tripping over his feet to get closer. “Robin! It’s Steve!” The group stopped dead. Nancy, Lucas, and Erica exchanged looks, but Robin didn’t hesitate. She took off sprinting toward them, the other three following behind a split second later. Jonathan dropped back down, his hand on Steve’s bicep to get his attention. “Steve, hold on, okay? Robin’s coming. She’s right here. Just another moment longer.”

Robin came skidding to a halt, Will and Jonathan taking a few steps back as she collapsed to her knees at his side. She took his face in her hands, and Steve coughed up some more blood before attempting a smile, his teeth stained. Jonathan could still make out his own blood red fingerprint on Steve’s cheek between Robin’s fingers. He was fading fast now. He didn't have much time left. “Steve, no, no, hey, you’re going to be okay.” She started rambling, tears streaking her face. Steve cut her off, weakly raising his arm to cup her cheek. His thumb smeared red across her skin while he tried to comfort her with a bloody hand.

“Robs,” he whispered. “Robs, ’s- ’s okay. Gonna- gonna see Eds again. ‘M okay.”

“Steve, please.” Robin’s voice cracked and broke.

The others had arrived, and Mike had moved back to stand with his sister and his friends. It wasn’t the whole group, but at least Steve wasn’t alone. At least he got to say goodbye to Robin. Nancy was crying, looking between Steve and Jonathan. All Jonathan could do was shake his head. There wasn’t anything more they could do. He had tried everything he could. There was no hope of getting him help. He wouldn’t make it back to the gate. This was it.

“‘S okay, Robbie. ‘M gonna be okay. You’re gonna be- be okay.”

“No, I’m not. Not without you. I need you, dingus.”

“No, you don't. You never did. I needed you.” Steve’s eyes fluttered. “Tell Dustin- Dustin that ‘m sorry, and ‘m with Eddie now, ‘kay? Make sure he’s- he’s okay. He’s gotta- gotta remember that- that I love ‘im, ‘kay? Max and El too. They- they gotta…. Do that for me?”

“Tell them yourself, dingus,” Robin whispered. “Stay alive, and tell them yourself.”

Steve tried to take a breath, but it was rattling and shallow. He got cut off by another rough bout of coughing that sounded so painful, even Jonathan’s chest hurt in sympathy. “I'm not sure I can anymore. I- I'm so- so cold.” He blinked at Robin, trying to smile. “Promise. Please?”

Robin sniffed, her next breath shaky. “Okay. I promise.”

“Thank you.” He sighed softly. “Love you, Robbie. Always,” he whispered on his last remaining breath. His eyes were closed, and he let out one last puff of air before his chest stilled. The air around them was heavy and silent as they all watched his arm go limp, falling from Robin’s cheek and hitting the ground with a gentle thud. It all seemed to happen in slow motion. That was it. Steve was gone.

The next sound that filled the air around them was Robin’s screaming as she collapsed forward onto her best friend. Her soulmate. She was covered in what remained of his blood, not even caring as she pressed her face against his chest and grabbed at his body as she shook with the force of each devastating sob. “I love you,” she stuttered out between gasping breaths and heart-wrenching cries. “I love you, okay? I love you.”

Steve had always done so much. He took care of them. He protected them. He loved them. In the end, there was nothing they could do to protect him.

Twenty years old was too young to die.

Nancy stood by Jonathan’s side, watching Robin as the grief completely overwhelmed her. “What happened?” she finally asked quietly, voice strained with tears.

Jonathan swallowed hard, his arm tight around her shoulders. “Demogorgon. It came out of nowhere, headed straight for Mike and Will. Steve shoved them out of the way, but there wasn’t time to fight it off. He didn’t stand a chance.”

“Dustin and Max are going to be devastated.”

“Robin almost didn’t make it in time,” Jonathan whispered, watching the girl gasp through more sobs that wracked her entire body. “I think he was waiting for her. He just wanted to say goodbye to his best friend.”

“I can’t imagine what would have happened if we hadn’t been here soon enough….” Nancy glanced at Mike and Will, who were standing with Lucas and Erica. All four of them watched in silence, tears rolling down their cheeks. “Are they okay?”

“Physically, they’re fine. Steve was the only one who- who got hurt. I don’t think they’re ever going to be okay about this, though. Mike is really upset. I think he blames himself a little.”

There was movement and noise in the distance. Jonathan looked up, spotting Hopper first. His heart dropped, knowing what he had to do now. He pulled away from Nancy, nodding in their direction when she looked at him.

"I'm gonna meet them halfway," he whispered. "I want to try to prepare them."

Nancy nodded. "I'll stay here with the kids and Robin. Jonathan?" He looked back at her. "Good luck."

He nodded solemnly. "Thanks."

Jonathan jogged to catch the other group before they got too close. They instantly slowed to a stop as he reached them.

Hopper frowned, eyes roving over Jonathan's appearance. "What happened? Are you okay? Where is that blood coming from?"

Jonathan glanced down at himself for the first time since all this started. He was covered, practically head to toe, in blood. Steve's blood. It was everywhere, soaked into his clothes and staining his hands. Distantly, he could still hear Robin's piercing screams echoing through the air.

"It- it's not mine," he answered dumbly, shaking his head.

"Then whose the hell is it?" Hopper demanded.

Silence followed for a moment. Jonathan paused, trying to think of how to say what he needed to say. There was really only one way to answer that question, though. He just had to say it. "Steve's."

"What?" Dustin paled where he stood next to Hopper. His eyes flickered between Jonathan and Hopper rapidly. Jonathan could see the panic rising in him.

He could feel the shock finally settling in. He knew it by the tingling that had started up in his fingers and toes. The way he couldn't quite get a full breath into his lungs. His heart was pounding against his rib cage and his blood was rushing in his ears.

"There- there was a- a demogorgon. He- he put himself in front of the boys.

Max was off before anyone could try to stop her. His mom had El in her arms as the tears started. Dustin was frozen, staring at Jonathan in horror.

"No," he whispered. "No, he- he-"

"I tried everything," Jonathan said softly. "I couldn't- I couldn't stop it. There was so much blood...."

"Jonathan." He looked up at the tone in Hopper's voice. He blinked a few times, trying to straighten out his scrambling brain.

"He- He didn't make it."

"No!" Dustin screamed, fat tears running down his grimy cheeks. "No, he can't! We have to save him! Steve!" Dustin took off. Jonathan could hear the sobs bursting from his chest as he ran.

"Is there any way-"

"No."

Jonathan was sticky with half-dried blood. He didn't know what to do anymore. He swayed on his feet. It was all coming down around him. He couldn't save Steve. He couldn't protect any of them. The blood was so sticky.

“Jonathan.” He looked up, not even realizing he had been staring at his red-stained hands. “Are you okay? Did anyone else get hurt?”

He shook his head again. “Steve, he- he pushed them out of the way. He saved them, and I- I couldn't even save him.”

“It's not your fault.”

Steve’s blood-soaked smile fluttered through his mind. His ears rang with Robin’s screaming sobs, her begging. He could still feel Steve’s blood seeping from his body between his fingers, soaking through everything they had to try and stop it. He couldn't save him. It sure felt like his fault.

He doesn't know what happens after that. Everything passes by him, every moment slipping through the gaps. All he knows is his hands are stained and tacky with dried blood. His clothes stick to him. Steve is dead.

Jonathan doesn't know how to live in a world that doesn't have Steve Harrington in it.

-----

No one ever prepares you for the aftermath of tragedy.

It's been a month, and Jonathan still can't close his eyes without seeing blood and bone and shredded muscle. He can't close his eyes without feeling the wetness seeping between his fingers and into his clothes. He always hears the echo of last words, of screaming, crying. He hears Robin begging Steve to hold on. He hears her stuttering “I love yous” in the wake of death.

Twenty years old is too young to die.

No one has seen or heard from Robin since. Max is more withdrawn than ever before. Mike is too quiet. Dustin’s just a shell. They've all been hit hard by so much loss. Everywhere they turned, someone else was dead. They were all bound to break eventually.

Jonathan knows it isn’t fair to think, but sometimes he wishes it had been him instead. Not that he thinks he deserves it over Steve and Eddie. No one deserves to die like that. It’s just…. Jonathan sees the way everyone needs them. He sees the way losing them has affected everyone else. He just wonders if maybe it would have been different. Maybe they wouldn’t be hurting so much, if Jonathan had died instead.

It's not fair.

Nothing is fair.

Steve Harrington has been dead one month, and Jonathan still doesn’t know how to live his life. He doesn't know how to move on from it. Jonathan is also convinced he has finally lost it. Every time he turns around, there Steve is. A glimpse in the grocery store, standing by the bus stop, lurking between shelves in Family Video.

God, they weren't even friends. They never had been. Truthfully, most of the time, they barely got along. They were civil, obviously. There was no hesitation when it came to the end of the world. But they were so far from friends. And yet.

Jonathan doesn't know how to live in a world that doesn't have Steve Harrington in it.

[f4ggydog]

💌 - All of these puppy asks have me thinking of werewolf tmasc Nat,,

He’d push himself extra hard in the wilderness to hunt for you and the team because he says it’s his responsibility bc of his werewolf abilities :(( but it’s obvious it takes a toll on him because you’re all starving and struggling out there.

Acting tough when he rly is just the softest sweetest little misunderstood puppy. Kissing him and his tail swishes side to side cause he gets too excited 😭

(And um. Desperately needing to breed you even if he can’t)

NO THOUGHTS JUST WEREWOLF BF I NEED TO BE HIS PRETTY FEMME

I have written for werewolf nat before but anon asked for this a while ago and for specifically tmasc nat so I shall fulfill!!!

nat doesn’t let his walls down quite easily. he’s not the type of guy up for small talk and he’s never been a dude who dances along the lines of the norm. the dude couldn’t care less about being hated by society. it’s given him a cold exterior that’s frustrating to shatter through at times. but as seems to be the cliche with many supposedly ice cold people, nat’s got a sweet spot that rivals the taste of candy.

he’s relieved that he remembered to pack some of his binders for the trip the yellowjackets were going to attend. at least he doesn’t have to worry about how his boobs look while he’s in the wilderness. it’s a first world concern compared to the predicament the team’s trapped themselves in, but nat could do without feeling extra desolate. he did forget his packers though, so perhaps all hope IS lost.

his tail swishes as he watches you gather firewood. though nat’s already got a heavy bias for you, he’s also appreciative of the fact that you’re also doing your part. you helped him clear out the cabin and make some room for all the soccer teammates to sleep. you helped him practice using a rifle so that you guys could hunt for food and not develop an eating disorder while starved for comfort food. you participate a lot more than jackie, who’s supposed to be the team’s captain. you’d think that she’d allow herself to take on most of the responsibilities, but she seems to be the one complaining the most. complaining instead of pinching in, yapping instead of making herself useful.

nat sighs, sitting by the edge of the lake. he quickly squishes his boobs and immediately convinces himself that they’ve somehow gotten bigger, if that’s somehow possible. he sighs, wishing he could take that axe from the camp and cut them off. he wishes a bear would come and maul him and rip off just the part of his body that he detests.

nat hears footsteps approaching him and he growls, his tail static. then, when he looks behind and sees that it’s you, his tail starts wagging rapidly and his frown turns into a smile. oh, how he couldn’t resist a moment of your time.

“did you find any game yet?” you inquire, kneeling down next to your boy.

“no.” nat shakes his head. “thought we saw a fucking deer earlier. nope, was a false alarm. everything’s just been false alarm after false alarm. and everyone is bitching to me about how hungry they are but nobody wants to go out hunting with me aside from flex.”

“i could always help you out,” you coo, squeezing nat’s cheeks together. “why don’t you let me come with you, pretty boy?”

“because i don’t want you to hurt yourself,” nat replies. “things are already bad enough out here as is. if you got hurt…i don’t know what i’d do with myself. honestly.”

“i think you worry too much about me,” you say. “i think you’re always trying to be a big, strong, tough man all the time and you don’t want to let anyone else in because you think you should bear the burden. you think you have to be alone, nat.”

“well, who else cares besides you?”

“am i not enough?” you tease, kissing along nat’s sensitive neck. his tail wiggles rapidly.

“h-hey quit it,” he whines, playfully shoving you aside. but you pounce back on nat, smooching him all over his handsome face.

“what’s wrong with a guy getting a few kisses once in a while? just cause you’re a man doesn’t mean you’re not worth of affection too, perfect boy. especially with how much you do for us.”

“am i even a man?” nat exhales. “look at my tits. they’re so visible. and my thigh gap is so…feminine. and my hips-“

“it’s your chest,” you assert. “not your tits. not your breasts. your chest. you have a chest, not boobs.”

“i can’t even properly breed you,” nat whines. “if i was born a guy, i would have this cool dick and i’d be able to cum inside of you all the time i want. but i just have this clit that i can’t use for anything.”

“doesn’t make you less of a man baby boy,” you encourage, kissing your ways down to his thighs. nat’s knees get shaky and his tail is spinning from side to side. “just means i get to take care of you. come on, shorts off.”

“why do you even like me?” nat whimpers after each kiss you plant on his pale skin.

“because i know who you are under that facade you put up,” you insist. “you’re a special boy, my man. and i’ll show you that you don’t have to put a knot inside me to be a true man.”

“you sure?” nat’s eyes soften.

“yeah baby.” you nuzzle into him. “besides, once we’re back home, we can always stimulate it with a fake cock. dildos exist for a reason.”

you’ve got a point. shit now, nat’s pheromones are all over the place. he blushes and hides his face, embarrassed by how horny he became in matter of seconds. wow, you really are the only one to get him.

[musicalmoritz]

any Tsukasa headcanons? I feel like everyone sees him as this demon monster who has no personality aside from murder :/

Tsukasa is an interesting character for me because he’s actually my favorite Yugi twin but I hate when ppl try to justify his actions…however some people go the opposite way and treat him like he’s a heartless villain with no depth so I end up defending him. Ppl get weirdly ableist abt it too it’s crazy. Tsukasa Yugi they could never make me hate you.

Now onto the headcanons

• I’m a firm believer that Tsukasa is adhd coded (I have adhd and I recognize my own kind)

• Specifically bcuz of the scene where child Amane said smth to Nene abt how Tsukasa would lose it if they didn’t play his favorite game at the festival, and due to the way he acts in movie theaters

• There’s room for debate over whether or not it can be called “coding” but you’ll never convince me that boy was intended to be neurotypical (autistic Tsukasa truthers are also valid)

• Since Sakura compares him to a cat I like to imagine he gets really clingy and cuddly with ppl for like 30 mins and then flips a switch and tries to bite them like cats do

• From “somebody hug me rn” to “touch me and I’ll kill you” within the span of a few minutes

• He takes a very “when I’m bored but then I remember I have a sibling” approach to bonding with Hanako. If the Broadcasting Crew and Mitsuba aren’t interesting him, he’ll pop over to Hanako’s bathroom and annoy him

• Not the kind of torment we see in the series though, he’ll just make annoying noises or keep asking Hanako to play games with him

• He likes animals but he’s terrible with them. Too aggressive, think of those poor fish

• I’m an aroace Tsukasa intellectual. I cannot see him caring abt romance beyond mild curiosity and his perverted behavior in the series seems to just be to mess with people/get reactions out of them as he’s known to enjoy doing (as opposed to Hanako’s pervert behavior which is pretty genuine, albeit comedic)

• His favorite subject in school was geography

• He doesn’t genuinely like many people besides Amane. He has a soft spot for Sakura and Natsuhiko though

• This is so far from canon but I think it’s funny to imagine that the entity inside of him is the TBHK equivalent of Venom. There’s still some debate over whether the current Tsukasa is entirely the entity or whether they share one being and I lean towards the later but I have this crack au/concept where the entity is like a little devil on his shoulder

• Sakura: What would you like to eat?

The Entity: The souls of the innocent👹

Tsukasa: A bagel

The Entity: Nooooooooo👹

Tsukasa: Two bagels

• Again, definitely not how it works in canon but it makes me giggle

• He really likes pumpkins and pumpkin flavored things

• FNAF kid

• He’s a massive extrovert in the sense that he gets his energy from being around other people, and he much prefers to be in a group than alone

• If he’s alone for too long he gets bored and agitated so he can usually be found in the presence of Sakura, Natsuhiko, Mitsuba, Amane, Mei, etc.

• Sometimes he’ll even hang out with Yako (I feel like they’d get along seeing as they both have rather sharp personalities, and I don’t think she’d judge him for his violent tendencies the way others do)

• When he was alive he had a lot of friends, pretty much the polar opposite of his brother

• He doesn’t feel guilty often but when he wants someone to forgive them, he’ll bring them a gift like a cat bringing someone a dead mouse

• Sometimes the gifts are morbid, sometimes they’re normal

• He was closer with his dad than his mom, because while both of them were creeped out by him his dad tried to assume the best

• He’s very creative and likes to invent things. In another life he’d kill it on Shark Tank

• Because of this he really enjoys cooking! He’s surprisingly good at it when he’s not just making the most appalling thing he can think of

• He enjoys soccer (in a human au I like to imagine him, Amane, Kou, and Yokoo would all be on the soccer team together)

• Supernaturals don’t need to sleep but Tsukasa is the only one who doesn’t bother sleeping at all. Most of the others enjoy having some time to rest but he likes to remain alert 24/7

• He likes to play red light/green light but he says red light crazy fast to scare ppl

• If you were ever on a long drive with him he would 100% start singing “One Hundred Bottles Of Milk On The Wall” and not stop until you reached your destination

That’s all I’ve got for now, thank you for the ask!! I love Tsukasa sm

[qmakobin]

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･UNSPOKEN FEELINGS °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

A/N: hi! This is Eribin. I am not a real writer, doing this as my past time. English is not my first language so bear with my English. There’s a lot of grammatical and typographical errors. This is just a fiction from my delusions 😆

NOTES: ITALIZED MEANS FLASHBACKS

Warning: drinking, angst

Words: 1800+

CAST:

Ryuta Hidaka BBZ as himself

Miku Fukahori BBZ as himself

Y/N

Ryuta's POV

Y/N was a mess when she arrived at my apartment, tears streaming down her face. She didn’t say a word as soon as I opened the door; she just threw herself into my arms, crying. I had no idea what had happened, but she soon began to tell me how she had caught Miku, her boyfriend, kissing another girl. She couldn’t stop sobbing as she described the scene. From the way she described the girl, I suspected it might be Kaede, Miku’s ex—tall, fair-skinned, with short hair. Kaede had left Miku to chase her dreams of becoming a model, and from what I knew, she had become one of the most successful models out there. I hated the thought of Miku still being stuck on her, but I never thought it would lead to something like this.

I felt guilty. I’m friends with both Y/N and Miku, though they’ve never met. I always thought they’d make the perfect couple. I’ve known Miku the longest, and he’s always been a stand-up guy—loyal, caring, funny, and ambitious. I thought he was exactly what Y/N needed. As for Y/N, we met through my work at LDH, where we collaborated on music projects. She has great taste in pop music, and we worked together a lot. I thought they’d be a great match, so I pushed them to meet. At first, Y/N wasn’t interested, but eventually, I convinced her. They hit it off, and before I knew it, they were officially together. I was happy for them, really, but deep down, I regretted setting them up. I wished I were the one she’d chosen, but I didn’t have the courage to tell her how I really felt.

"You know what, I have a friend. He's single. You want me to introduce you to him?" I asked her, trying to distract her from her while working on a project.

She paused for a second, then smiled weakly.

"Nahh.. I'm too busy. No time for that!" she said, brushing off my suggestion.

But I didn’t give up. I kept pushing until she agreed, and when they met, it was like they’d known each other forever. They clicked. They started dating. And just like that, I felt a pang of jealousy, though I kept it to myself. I was glad for them, but at the same time, I couldn’t help wishing things were different. I was too much of a coward to confess my feelings. I couldn’t tell her that I had wanted to be the one by her side.

"Tell me, Ryuta, what's wrong with me? I know that I am pretty. Have a decent job that pays me well, I am kind, I am lovable, I am--"

I interrupted before she could continue because I knew what she was going to say. There was nothing wrong with her. She was everything anyone could want.

"There's nothing wrong with you, Y/N. You know what, rest. And tomorrow you two talk."

But she wasn’t listening. She poured herself another drink, her voice shaky as she continued, "He didn't pick up my calls. He really abandoned me and our relationship."

I knew she was getting drunk, and I needed to keep an eye on her, but I didn’t know how to make her feel better. It killed me to see her in so much pain.

"I am sorry, Y/N. This is my fault. I should've seen what was happening with Miku. If only I--"

She cut me off by pressing her finger to my lips.

"Shhhhh... it’s not your fault, Ryuta. If there's anyone to blame here, it's me. Probably I was not a good girlfriend at all. I am not the one he's looking for." She said, and her tears started to fall again. It broke my heart. How could Miku do this to her? Y/N was everything good and kind, and she deserved so much better.

As the night dragged on, Y/N’s tears slowly stopped, and the silence between us grew. I watched her as she stared blankly at her empty glass, her red-rimmed eyes hollow with sadness. I sat beside her, my heart aching, unsure of what to say or do.

"You know what, Ryuta," she whispered, her voice barely audible, "If you were probably the one I dated, I wouldn't be hurting like this."

I froze, my heart skipping a beat. Was she serious? Or was it just the alcohol talking? I turned to look at her, but she was staring down at the glass in her hands, too drunk to meet my gaze.

"Y/N..." I managed to say, my voice barely above a whisper.

"I know I can't change what happened, Ryuta," she continued, her voice fragile, "But I'm grateful for your friendship. You've always been there for me."

I nodded, my throat tight. "I'm always here for you, Y/N. No matter what." I wanted to say more, but the words caught in my chest. I wanted to tell her I cared for her, that I had always cared for her, but I couldn’t. I was scared. Scared that maybe she didn’t feel the same. That maybe I wasn’t enough.

The silence between us stretched, heavy with the things I couldn’t say. Y/N’s words echoed in my mind: "If you were probably the one I dated, I wouldn't be hurting like this." I wondered if she meant it, or if it was just something she said out of frustration and pain. But maybe, just maybe, she did.

"I don't deserve this pain," she said after a long pause, her voice trembling, "I don’t deserve someone who would make me feel this way, you know? I gave him everything. I thought he was different. I thought he was the one."

I took her hand without thinking, my fingers brushing hers. Her hand was cold, and I could feel her trembling, but she didn’t pull away. She didn’t say anything either, but we both understood what the silence meant.

"Y/N," I began softly, squeezing her hand, "You deserve someone who sees you for everything you are. Someone who never doubts you, someone who never makes you feel less than amazing." I paused, my heart pounding. "And I promise you, I will always see you that way."

"You're such a good friend, Ryuta," she said, her voice still soft but full of gratitude. "But... I don’t know if I can trust anyone anymore. I don’t know if I can even trust myself."

"I’m not asking you to trust anyone right now," I said, my heart aching. "I just need you to know that I’m here for you. Always. Whether it’s to listen, or to just sit here with you in silence. You don’t have to face this alone."

The weight of my unspoken feelings was suffocating, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her how I felt. She wasn’t ready for that.

She looked up at me, her eyes softening, and for a brief moment, I thought I saw something in her eyes—something that made my heart race. She leaned in, almost as if she were going to say something, but she stopped herself.

"Maybe... maybe you’re right. Maybe I do deserve better." She met my eyes, her gaze searching mine, looking for something I wasn’t sure how to give.

I didn’t pull away, but I didn’t say anything more. I just smiled at her, offering the support she needed. It wasn’t much, but it was all I could give for now.

"Get some sleep, Y/N," I said gently, guiding her back onto the couch. "Tomorrow will be better. You’ll feel better."

She nodded, closing her eyes as she drifted into sleep. I stayed beside her, my mind racing with everything I hadn’t said.

But for tonight, it wasn’t the right time. Not yet.

(Ryuta and Miku, AAAAACCCCKKKK!! ❤️❤️❤️)

The end~ THANK YOU SM FOR READING MY STORY 😘

[yelenabelovasbxtch]

Crush On An Archer PT. 2

A/N: Can you believe I actually managed to get out another part in a timely matter without making you wait 5 months in between? I think we're getting to the good part soon so stay tuned.

Kate Bishop X f!reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: Not proofread

The next few days went by fast, you had a couple more practices but didn’t see Kate again and you flew home without even getting to say goodbye. 

As soon as your plane landed and you turned off airplane mode, your text notifications binged with Kate’s name on your screen. 

“Hey Y/L/N, want to grab a drink tonight?” *Sent 2 hours ago*

“Hey Kate, sorry I didn’t respond sooner, my plane just landed and I’m back in Mississippi now :( I would have loved to though.”

“Damn, didn’t even say goodbye?”

Did she want you to say goodbye? Were you at that level of friendship? 

“Yeah, sorry, I had an early flight out this morning.”

“Damn, oh well…all my friends left too so I’m going back to being bored as fuck again. This summer honestly blows.”

“Yeah, I hear that. Trust me, I would much rather be there, than here.”

“How come you didn’t want to stick around a little longer? The semester does start in like only two weeks.”

“I’m not technically “paying” my rent over the summer so I can’t really stay there or else I’d have to put out the money to my landlord and also pay all the other bills that come with it.”

“Ah yeah that makes sense. Too bad you couldn't have stuck around though.”

“Yeah I agree, I am very bored here.” 

The two of you continued to talk every day, your friendship grew over text and Snapchat, pretty much the only way it could at this point. You are pretty notorious for sleeping in and every morning you wake up to see Kate’s text message and Snapchat notification pop up on your phone. You get your daily dose of Kate and get to see her beautiful face everyday whenever she’d respond to your snaps or post her BeReals when they went off. They always made you smile, sometimes they made you feel a little more than just a smile… but every morning without fail it was usually a Snap of her in bed and fuck did she look hot. Like who wakes up just naturally looking that good? You could swear it looked like she was “trying or posing” a little in the pics she sent to you but also you wouldn’t put it past her for just looking that good anytime her photo was taken. Honestly, there were some times where she would text you for an hour straight and the two of you would have the most amazing conversations but then other times where she would be MIA for most of the day and you feel like maybe you said the wrong thing. You noticed that she would always come back though. You learned to realize that it was just your anxiety speaking loudly when she didn’t respond and she couldn’t hate you, she barely even knew you. She just was busy and didn’t respond for that moment. Or maybe she was having a hard day but she always ended up coming back and talking to you about it. 

You were excited but also really terrified about moving back to school. You and Kate had learned what each other's interests were and talked a lot about certain things you wanted to do together when you moved back. You discussed everything, going to the movies, cooking together, practicing together and you managed to convince her to try building LEGO with you. 

I mean, who doesn’t like LEGO?

The text messages between the two of you were often pretty friendly but from time to time she teased you, loved to call you a nerd for all your interests like Star Wars and Harry Potter but you knew she secretly liked them too. 

Although she seemed like she was flirting, there were times where she’d talk about guys who were hitting on her and her ex-boyfriends and it just made you feel like there was no chance in hell she would ever be into you. Based on her track record alone, you weren’t exactly her type. Mainly just because everyone she has ever mentioned is a man. Obviously, you can’t read a person off of just that information because you never know. But, it didn’t exactly feel like it was going your way. Anytime she would do or say something that maybe led you to believe she had feelings for you it was almost immediately squashed by another comment or story about a guy.

“So what are you up to today?”

“Not much, probably going to go practice my shot a bit.”

“I feel like all you ever do is practice”

“Well yeah, best archer in the world title has to be honored ;)” 

“Haha. I am almost 100% certain the only person who calls you that, is you.”

“Not trueee”

“Your mom doesn’t count…” “Or your dog.”

“Well. I am sure someone else has said it. Besides, practice isn’t allll I do. I’m going to the gym after. Probably hitting arms and a bit of chest today.”

“Okay Bishop, I see you, I didn’t know you took lifting seriously and stuff.”

“Well obviously, gotta make sure I’m in better shape than all the other archers. Especially when you are on the senior team next year.”

“Worried you’re going to be beat out for world's best archer or something?”

“Haha. Very funny. I don’t think I have anything to worry about ;)”

Your conversations were often short like that one but something else always ended up coming up later on. About an hour and a half later your phone bings with a text message from Kate. 

*Attachment: 1 Image*

Fuck you mumble under your breath. 

She doesn’t do it often, but sometimes she’ll send you a picture of herself over imessage where there isn’t a 10 second expiry like on Snap and every time she does it makes you smile. It feels like this one was taken specifically for you. She wanted you to see this now and she wanted you to remember what this photo looked like. Kate always works out in sports bras, making you think about how you’d kill to get in the gym with her just to see what would happen between the two of you in the locker room afterwards. You have been staring at this picture for way too long, it’s time to respond. How do you even answer a text like that? A compliment? No, she might think you’re into her and take it the wrong way. Flirty banter? As long as it’s dialed back I'm sure it’ll be fine. 

“I think I can see a little bit of muscle there on your arms.”

“Oh shut up, you love it and we both know it.”

W-What? Fuck. 

“Yeah you wish Bishop.” Good response. Friendly banter right? 

She didn’t respond to that last text, you just assumed she went on with her workout. About an hour later you get a snap notification across your screen from her. You may have waited a couple minutes to open it just to not make it seem obvious that you were practically waiting for her name to pop up. 

You opened the snap and your jaw practically had to be picked up off the floor. 

Sweaty Kate, hovering over her phone for the pic, in a sports bra, sex eyes, thin silver chain dangling. 

Fuck. You wanted this picture seared into your brain. The one you received over text was hot but this one was even hotter. It was sexy, it was all you wanted and more and fuck did you want to tell her that. 

One thing you noticed while staring at this photo is how long you got to look at how hot she was. She changed her settings for the picture to be set to infinity from 10 seconds. She wanted you to know how hot she looked and she wanted you to take your time admiring her. The only acceptable response back had to be a picture of you acting nonchalant about what you just saw. The last thing you wanted to do was make her think you were ogling over her. 

Later that night you were laying in bed scrolling TikTok when her contact popped up at the top of your screen. 

“Men are so fucking shit sometimes.”

“What happened?” 

Yeah…you will always be an outlet for her even if it’s the worst friend zone of friend zones you’ve ever been stuck in. 

“Nothing. Just stupid boys making shit comments.”

“Do I need to knock some heads?”

“Haha I wish. But no, I just can’t deal with my ex and his friends. They’re all privileged assholes anyways.”

“Yuck hate a privileged asshole.”

“Yeah, I met him through this stupid rich people dinner event my mom made me go to awhile ago and I should have known that he wasn’t any different and just as snobby as the rest of them.”

Doesn’t really sound like the ex is much competition if that’s the case. 

“Yeah I can imagine that wouldn’t make the best partner. It’s good he at least isn’t a part of your life anymore right?”

“Yes going forward he won’t be. I told him there will be no contact between us again. It just really fucking sucks you know? He was this amazing really sweet guy who I grew to care for and love deeply and then out of nowhere it was like a switch flipped. And the toughest part is that sometimes I feel like I still care for him but then I remember what he’s actually like.”

If she still has feelings this is not good.

“I get it, breakups of course are tough and you just need to take your time to really get back to being you and no longer thinking about this guy.”

“Well said Y/L/N. Enough about me and my issues though. What about you? You got your eye on anyone or with anyone?”

Ah. Fuck it. It’s late, let’s have a little fun. 

“Uhh yeah I guess there’s one person but it’ll prob never work out so I gotta move on.”

“Ouuuu omg okay who are they, do they go to our school?”

“Yes and I will not be disclosing that information because I really do not need it getting out haha”

“Boooo, c'mon you can trust me.”

“Oh my god is it because it’s someone I know?”

“Maybe.”

“How well do I know them?”

“Hmmmm I’d say pretty well but I’m not going to tell you who it is so I wouldn’t bother guessing.”

“Boring. I’ll get it out of you when we move back to school.”

“Haha sure you will.”

“Speaking of, there’s this bar down the street from where my place is, my friends told me the team and a few others are going out on the Friday before the new semester starts. Are you going to be back by then?”

“Yeah, I should be. If not, I can always try to change my flight to come in a little earlier.”

“Yeah I think you should. It sounds like fun.”

“I just checked and my flight lands at JFK later in the day on Thursday so once I find a ride to campus I’ll be there probably late Thursday night.”

“Oh you’re flying in and out of JFK? I can give you a ride if you want. I’ve been staying at my apartment in the city for the summer so I can pick you up on my way to campus and save you a few bucks on transportation.” “That’s really nice but you don’t have to do that.”

“Y/n, I insist, it’s no big deal.”

“Okay well thank you, let me at least pay you some money for gas.”

“Don’t sweat it. If you really want to repay me you can help eye my shot next week. I’ve been having some issues with my arrows going a little left and can’t figure out why.”

“Wow, is the best archer in the world asking me for archery advice?”

“Ha. ha.”

“Hehe sorry you know I couldn’t resist.

The next week or so went by unbelievably slowly. The contact between you and Kate was still there but not as much and the fact that she was picking you up from the airport had your mind spinning in circles. You were so unbelievably nervous to see her and be with her, just the two of you again…sober this time. The tension that was created the last time you two were alone felt like it was tearing through you. Everyone knows that things are a little more awkward when you’re sober though. You don’t feel as invincible as when you’re drunk. Whenever you drink, you feel like you have the guts to say whatever you want to. Who knows, maybe the Friday night plans will grow into something more, maybe they won’t. 

The morning of your flight you wake up to a message from Kate,

“Hey y/n! Text me when you land and tell me which terminal to pull up to today. Have a safe flight <3, I’m looking forward to seeing you”

The second half of that message gave you butterflies in your stomach. You wanted to be there now, in her arms. Oh god, are you guys at the point in your friendship where you hug when you see each other?

I guess we’ll see. 

– End of PT. 2 –

Taglist: @yelenaslyubov @youreatotalposer @jeyramarie @flosbelova @bridgecitybrad @justthis-stuff @chloe7076 @ailenepuff @ravenclawbitch426 @mellowladyangel @amcg0605-blog @kassies-take @yelenaswife1996 @wandanatchick @lilroachsworld @inluvwithfictionalwomen @x666hours @natashaswife4125 @onetruwhore @karmasgxrl @hopelesslyfallenninlove @setsuna1415 @swiftdazer @imobsessedwithmilfss @madamevirgo @louisprettybab @splatalia-jumpanova @jediluka @t00manyfand0ms @oohlala666 @kates-abs-slay @scmg11

[qprstobin]

Different first meeting post-s1 Stobin AU (that sort of turned into Fruity Four) I was tossing around for myself to write but am going to put it out into the world because I’m not sure I’ll ever get to it.

It’s the Spring of 1984, and Nancy is looking for a way to help Steve pad his college application after seeing him struggle with his essay writing for the past few months. Somehow, this leads to her convincing him to join the Spring play, Romeo and Juliet. Not only will it look good on his application to add another extra curricular, but the English teacher always gives extra credit for drama participation, especially the annual Shakespeare play.

Steve, of course, ends up getting the lead role, much to his chagrin, and he turns out to be a pretty good actor. This should all be smooth sailing, a way for him to get an easy add on to his apps, if it wasn’t for who was playing Juliet.

Band Geek Buckley.

She isn’t the worst choice - they have pretty good stage chemistry, and she’s funny in a mean way (in a way he’s kind of missed now that he no longer is talking to Carol and Tommy) but she hates his guts. He honestly didn’t even really know who she was before this, but he could feel her glaring at the back of his head in first period every day.

Honestly, they would be fast friends if both of them weren’t trying their hardest to make sure the other knows no showmances will be happening between them. (Robin for obvious reasons, and Steve because he is very much in love with Nancy at this point and would not ever cheat on her.)

Steve at one point tells her that she isn’t his type (which actually, is kind of a lie but it doesn’t matter because it would never happen), and Robin is just, so fucking offended. She would never want to date him (he’s a man AND an asshole), but where does he get off saying shit like that?? Robin in turn, nearly outs herself at one point by claiming she’d rather kiss his girlfriend than him.

(Nancy on the other hand… spends the entire play very confused, because despite the disgust that both of them express during the (rather chaste) kiss scenes, Nancy thinks it’s kind of hot. She has a lot to think about.)

Even before they become actual, spill your secrets on the bathroom floor friends, they get into so much chaos together. Definitely the type to be bickering with each other but then team up to turn on someone else when they are being rude or creepy. Even though there are no Russian Spies to bond them together for life (yet), they probably go through some harrowing night together that leaves them with something of a headache.

Maybe they accidentally eat too many weed brownies together at a cast party, maybe they get locked in the prop closet for several hours, maybe they get stranded at a gas station outside of town when their director sent them on what was both a “you are going to work your shit out TONIGHT for the sake of the play” and “y’all are the only ones available” emergency prop run. Either way it ends in tears and laughter and bathroom (or closet) floor confessions and a rock solid friendship.

Nancy is happy that Steve has a friend that isn’t just her or Jonathan, and is happy to have a new friend herself, especially a female one.

Tammy Thompson is less happy that Steve’s attention is on Robin, which is unfortunate, as this is Robin’s peak Tammy Thompson era, and Tammy gets mean. Nancy definitely tries to fight her at some point for how rude she’s being to all of them (Tammy didn’t like Nancy much either, she just didn’t honestly care much about Tammy saying rude shit to her, but she isn’t gonna let someone be a bitch to her friend like that). Steve was just going to ruin her reputation, but honestly, he didn’t even need to with how hard Nancy went in on her.

(Nancy trying to fight Tammy is also how Robin moves on from her “god what a priss” mindset regarding her. A minor crush may also blossom. Steve is happy to commiserate over being clocked in the head emotionally by Nancy Wheeler, he made t-shirts.)

Their odd friend group gets rounded out to four (five if you include Jonathan, who does eat lunch with them everyday but who thinks that Stobin are a bit too loud for him in anything other than small doses) by another cast member - the drug dealer Eddie Munson.

This is Eddie’s first try at senior year but his prospects aren’t looking great. English isn’t the only class he’s doing poorly in, but it is one of the main ones, and his English teacher has offered him a boon - get a speaking role in the spring play and he’ll get enough extra credit to pass the class, as long as he makes an actual effort to turn in his work for the rest of the year. He thinks fuck it! Might as well, this is the only deal the hag is going to give me, and ends up landing the role for Mercutio.

His start with the group isn’t as tumultuous as the Stobin friendship starts out, though there definitely isn’t any love lost between them. Steve may have dropped Hagan and Perkins earlier in the year, but he’s still a jock, and his prissy, perfect girlfriend isn’t much better. Eddie doesn’t have any personal issues with Robin, but Robin definitely isn’t a fan of his, not with how loud the other man is.

There isn’t any real dramatic moment that adds him to the group, at least not as dramatic as what finally solidifies the Stobin bond, but spend enough time running lines together and he sort of realizes that maybe they aren’t as bad as all that.

(Really Eddie is just there to cause chaos, and try to pass Senior English. Falling into the weirdest friend group known to Hawkins High is just a bonus.)

Honestly, I came up with this idea because I just wanted more Stobin dif first meetings, and thought the idea of Stobin having to play romantic leads opposite each other in a play was hilarious. It ended up becoming Fruity Four just because Stancy is still happening here, and Eddie was perfect for the role of Mercutio. I didn’t even have set ideas on how I want this to end shipping wise. Just wanted to get it out of my misc WIP document <3

[romanticatheartt]

I’m pretty new to the fandom but am I the only one who doesn’t think Feyre’s been sidelined? We had 4 books of her as the only or main POV where the series very obviously resolved around her then one spinoff book where she’s not the main character but feysand are clearly the next most prominent characters in the book after nessian and even though the pregnancy plot isn’t well liked, it doesn’t change the fact that so much of nesta’s healing arc and the kickoff of her journey, the rock bottom, and climax of it in book revolve around her relationship with feyre. We even see feyre having so high lady moments even though nesta is avoiding her for parts.

And then I thought given the story that sjm ended up writing for CC3, it’s obvious why feyre isn’t there- she wanted Bryce to use the mask and needed nesta to give it to her and for Bryce to be skeptical of prythian. Feyre is not born fae, ruler of NC, and less prickly then both Az and Nesta (and Amren and Rhys even), she’d hurt the distrusting conflict and wouldn’t give the mask like nesta without getting more involved (at least involving Rhys). I suspect sjm wanted a different plot at first but decided to change it and maybe it’s because she didn’t want the acotar side to take over (Bryce even considers asking Rhys for help because he’s so strong but decides against it because she can’t trust him not to become a conqueror). I thought it was purposeful that the friendliest members of the IC were basically absent. She may even be saving aspects of that original plot for a larger team up later, maybe in an acotar book since prythian’s (and Feyre/Rhys/the high lord’s) power is given such focus. It’s not even an acotar book, like should Az’s greater presence in it be seen as a sign that he’s more important than Rhys in acotar?

If the next book comes out and feyre is just not a factor, I’d get it more. But I just don’t see what’s got everyone convinced sjm isn’t interested in feyre or whatever.

People talking about Feyre being sidelined in acosf are just looking for something to hate lol because even I knew Feyre wasn't going to be the main character when sjm made pretty clear this is Nesta's/Nessian's book. Feyre doesn't even have a pov in acosf ffs (except that bonus chapter) and still, she has an important role in Nesta's book because she's the biggest part of Nesta's guilt and self-hatred. And yes in my recent semi-reread of acosf there are so many times that we see Feyre as High Lady (and I absolutely love those!!)

Like you said I'm not too fond of Feyre's pregnancy plot either and I think it shouldn't have been in Nesta's book and it definitely shouldn't have been used as a redemption arc for Nesta. In other words, both Nesta and Feyre deserved better than this. Feyre deserved a beautiful pregnancy after all she's been through and Nesta deserved a better journey where other characters weren't used for her, the focus should've been on her and her relationship with others.

Now about CC I was one of those people who wanted to see more Feyre and were disappointed. Not because I think she was sidelined, no. But because I expected to see her at least in one scene? I mean it could be totally because of my love Feyre that I wanted to see her again, that's my only disappointment and not because I think she should've had a big role or something.

I expected Nesta to have some major role in CC (not this much tho) and for Azriel, I fully anticipated him to be an important character because of Truthteller and Bryce bringing Starsword with her. I still think sjm focused on these two a lot because even after CC people are more focused on acotar characters than the CC characters. And if Feyre had joined the focus of readers would've completely been on acotar so now after 7 months I think sjm did the right thing. Feyre being a mother is a nasty way for the fandom to talk about their displeasure and bring down Feyre for being a mother which isn't surprising at all since everyone thinks she's now "less cool" because of it.

Now about Azriel, I don't think he's more important than Rhys (call me biased idc lmao😭 and my beef with him) I think the reason why he's so focused on, is because he's going to have the next book. We're going to see his back story and how he's possessing TT and who is going to possess Starsword (and as I said before I think it's going to be Gwyn and she's going to be a Starborn because we have no idea who her father is so sjm can put anyone as her father) and I know some think Azriel is the Starborn and I THINK NOT!!! Idk how to explain it, I just know he's not hehe :D

I think Feyre is still going to be in the next books because she's the main character of the series and she's still a high lady after all, but it will be something like acosf. And I think she's going to have a same amount of page time (lol) in Elucien book like she had in acosf.

[hirikka]

find me somebody to love (1/7)

Part 2

For Steddie Week Day 1: Hunger / Pining / Somebody to Love by Queen @steddie-week​

Eddie is avoiding Steve to try to get over his crush, Steve thinks Eddie hates him, and Robin is suffering

The door swings open as Steve arrives for his shift. Eddie knocks his hand on the counter twice. "That's my cue to leave." He clearly means to say it quietly enough that Steve won’t hear him, but Robin doesn’t think Eddie’s ever heard of an inside voice and she can see by the way Steve’s face falls that he definitely heard.

Robin rolls her eyes but doesn't protest as Eddie makes his way towards the exit, trying to look casual and completely failing to do so. She watches as Steve tries to start a conversation, and Eddie makes a half-hearted excuse about being late for band practice and speedwalks out of the store.

Steve looks so dejected Robin is pretty sure even his hair droops a little. It would be tragic if it weren't so funny—or maybe it's the other way around, she really hasn't decided yet. Steve slumps his way over and lets himself behind the counter, pulling his vest on before he trudges over with his head on the counter.

"He hates me," Steve mutters.

"What?"

"Eddie—he hates me," Steve says. "Do you know why? Did I do something?"

"He doesn't hate you," Robin says. She really honestly cannot believe that either of them are actually this stupid.

Steve sits up to stare at her incredulously, and oh no, this was a lot easier when she couldn't see his pathetic kicked puppy expression. "Then why is he avoiding me?"

And because Robin has never been great at keeping her mouth shut and because she really, really doesn't like seeing her friend this miserable, she blurts out, "He has a crush."

Steve blinks at her for several long moments where Robin screams internally because she just betrayed Eddie's trust and also because Steve does not look as happy as she’d expected, and she was so sure she was right about this and that he would be happy and—

"On who?" Steve asks. He's still got the kicked puppy look, and it might have actually gotten worse?

How could this happen to us? Steve's droopy hair seems to be saying. Was I not pretty enough? Fluffy enough?

"Uh." Robin wracks her brain, trying to figure out what she should do here because she shouldn't actually tell Steve, but also she has a feeling lying would really not help the situation. "I really shouldn't be getting involved in this," she tries. "You could, like, ask him, maybe?"

Steve sighs with all the tragedy of, like, a pining heroine in a Bronte novel, and Robin really doesn't understand how he'd managed to convince so many people he was cool for so many years. "How am I supposed to do that if he avoids me all the time?"

Robin really, really doesn't know what to tell him because, like, he has a point and it’s not like she can come out and say why Eddie has been avoiding him, but she would very much like her friends to be happy. Part of her wants to encourage him to go and talk to Eddie but she’s worried that might make things worse, somehow, since the chances of either of them admitting to their actual feelings seems vanishingly small. "Maybe just give him some time?"

"Time to do what, though?" Steve frowns. "Is he hanging out with his crush right now?"

"I'm not sure?"

Steve taps his fingers on the counter. "So, you're saying he's not avoiding me specifically? He's just trying to find a way to, like, ask his crush out or something?"

"Or something," Robin agrees. Honestly, how is this boy so clueless?

"Maybe I can be his wingman?" Steve suggests in a tone that implies he would very much like to do basically anything other than that. "Then I could hang out with him, at least..."

Jesus Christ. "Yeah, that might be good."

Steve nods. "Alright. I can do that. I can help him with his crush."

"I bet you can," Robin mutters.

"Hm?"

"Just, like, get to work dingus. Enough obsessing over Eddie."

"I'm not obsessing over Eddie," Steve protests. Robin just raises her eyebrows and waits for Steve to admit defeat. "Alright, fine, maybe a little."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

[lonesome-witching]

Dial Drunk

People apparently like drunk Nancy. I tried to make it different enough from Do You Think I'm Pretty? which was the previous drunk Nancy ficlet. I hope you guys like this one too.

You can send me prompts here or read some of the previous prompts here.

Robin had her own landline. She had gotten it right after the end of the world part 2. At least part 2 for her, part 4 for most of the people she now considered her closest friends. The reason was plain and simple, Steve, Nancy and most of the party would not stop calling her house phone at the most ungodly hours. Unfortunately for them the landline had been connected to a phone on her parents’ bedside table. Meaning that every single time one of her friends called at 2:41 am or some other variation of an inappropriate hour to call, her parents would be awoken by the incessant ringing that wouldn’t stop until they called their daughter over to pick up the phone. 

Ergo why her parents had invested in a separate landline for their only daughter. 

It was a pink fluffy thing that they had been able to get at a discount. Robin hated how it looked. She had tried to rip the fur off the receiver several times which just caused some horrendous bald spots that somehow made it worse. 

The first time Nancy had come over she had laughed at the sight for over 10 minutes. And she started giggling again every time her eyes caught the device. 

That was two days after their first kiss. 

“Well it might be an atrocious thing but it will permit me to talk to you whenever I want.” Robin had said before pecking Nancy’s lips. 

“In that case, I love it.” Nancy had replied, kissing Robin after every word. 

Now it was ringing loudly, echoing through the room. Robin groaned as she turned toward it, sleepily picking up the receiver and pressing it to her ear. 

“Hello?” She slurred out. 

“Robin! Robin, thank God!! I need you.” Nancy shouted from the other side of the line. 

“Nancy? Are you okay?” Robin sat up on the bed, her mind suddenly awake and spiraling. 

“Me? I’m good! I’m perfect. I just need you!!” 

“What do you need me for?” Robin slid her hand over her face. 

“You know.” Nancy lowered her voice to her whisper. “I just need you.” 

“I’ll come over.” Robin conceded easily. She never needed a lot of convincing. It didn’t matter that it was nearly 3 a.m. 

“No!” Nancy yelled loud enough to make Robin’s ear ring. “I’m not home.” 

“Where are you then?” 

“Steve.” A hiccup. “There was a party and Steve asked me to go.” A laugh. “I’m at a party.” 

“You went to a party with Steve?” And she just couldn’t keep the hurt out of her voice. It didn’t matter that they went to a party without her. She was fine with that, she didn’t even want to go to any parties. What hurt was that she didn’t know. Neither of them had bothered to tell her. 

“Yes. It’s at Andr- Andy- Andrew’s house.” 

“Andrew Hickins?” 

“That one!” 

“Okay, I’m on my way.” 

She threw the receiver down before Nancy could reply in any way. She didn’t have a car, still didn’t have a license although Nancy was teaching her. That was why she felt the cold night air attack her bare ankles and arms. She should have grabbed her jacket on the way, should have changed into jeans. 

But Nancy had said she needed her. And so Robin rushed to the scene. 

Nancy was sitting on the porch, next to Steve, her head resting on his shoulder. A small bug started forming in the pit of her stomach at the sight. But before it could take flight, Steve jumped up. 

“Robin! You’re here.” He looked as if he just saw a ghost. 

“I told you she’d be here. Robin never disappoints.” Nancy hopped towards her girlfriend. She stayed two steps away. “Do you want a drink, Robbie?” 

“I want to take you home, Nance.” Robin grabbed Nancy’s arm, pulling her closer. 

“Oh, yes, Robbie, take me!” Nancy moaned. She goddamned moaned while they were standing outside a bustling high school party with Steve Harrington standing next to them, mouth agape. “Take me right here.” Nancy whispered, leaning even closer. 

“Nance, let’s get you home.” 

“I’ll drop you off. You can put the bike in the back.” Steve muttered. 

Nancy ran off toward his car. “I remember where it is! Follow me!” She shouted. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Steve whispered, walking next to his best friend. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Robin responded, grabbing her bike from the sidewalk and dragging it along. 

Steve opened the trunk of the car, pushing the bike in. The handles hung over the backseat, one of the wheels sticking out prohibiting the car from closing. 

Despite the backseat being halfway blocked, Nancy still dragged Robin to sit next to her. Robin could feel the brakes of her bike poking into the back of her head. But Nancy was hugging her arm close and breathing into Robin’s neck and it was enough to forget the discomfort. 

Steve drove in silence, Robin stroked Nancy’s arm and Nancy simply got as close to her girlfriend as she could, a soft smile on her face. The car stopped in front of the Wheeler house. Nancy crawled out, pulling Robin along. 

She stumbled, having trouble finding her footing, nearly falling to the ground and pulling Robin on top of her. For once it was Robin who stabilized her girlfriend. 

“You okay?” 

Nancy nodded, her eyes closed as she breathed in the scent of the girl in front of her. 

“We should go inside.” 

“Are you going to take care of me, Robin?” Nancy asked, looking more sober as she opened her eyes and looked at Robin through her lashes. 

“Always.”

[acacia-may]

Acacia's Definitive Defense of Langris x Finesse

No one asked about this pairing, but I'm going to ramble about them anyway... especially since I realized I don't think I've ever actually written a proper post about them as this has been sitting in my drafts for over a year (A/N: Yikes! Sorry friends. I completely forgot I wrote this until today when I tried to find that post I was absolutely certain I had made about Langris x Finesse only to find it buried in my unposted drafts 😅🙈 But I'm posting it now to coincide with the ship ask game so it kind of works...? Maybe? I have no excuses...).

Anyways, dear goodness do I have thoughts about this ship. I’m not sure I can even wrangle them all, but I am going to try my best.

I’m sure it’s pretty clear from my blog that I have a deep love for my spatial mage boys and want good things for them which is one of the main reasons why I have a lot of concerns about the whole House Vaude soap opera. A friend of mine (irl) and I once discussed that plotline for literally 6 hours so I could go on and on about this for ages, but I have tried my best to be brief. That didn't really happen so I apologize in advance for all of the rambling.

I've tried to keep the focus of this post on Langris and Finesse's relationship, so please check out this post if you want to hear my many thoughts on the House Vaude succession drama as whole and in general. To keep things organized, I've divided this discussion into 2 main subsections for clarity under the cut!

(Warnings: Black Clover spoilers and discussion of some heavier topics such as childhood trauma and abuse. Arranged marriage is also mentioned)

Why I Think Langris and Finesse Genuinely Love Each Other (not necessarily in a romantic way but definitely in a selfless care and concern kind of way)

One of my most basic premises for my personal interpretation of Langris' character really comes down to the fact that I think what Langris actually wants more than anything else is unconditional love and to be accepted for who he is (rather than what he does/his accomplishments). He wants to have people who love him, a family—but he'd never admit this because he is convinced he'll never get it. He is convinced that love needs to be earned and he can't earn it, and his relationship with Lady Finesse is a perfect example of this, I think.

It hurts Langris that she is just the kindest person ever and she doesn't like/love him (or such is the reality in Langris' mind anyway given the fact that he has carried around that one time she complimented Finral as "she hates me" for literal years in the canon. But I digress). Langris doesn't like games he can't see a possibility of winning. He closes himself off from love and building meaningful relationships because he doesn't think he'll "win" people's love in the end. He's very cynical and jaded in this way, but more than that, he's wounded. It comes from a place of being denied love without strings attached, without conditions for his entire life and of being told his by his parents that love has to be earned and being convinced that he can't earn it, that nothing he does will ever be good enough and that he will never deserve the love he so desperately craves. And in that way, it comes from a fear of being hurt and rejected. When you care about someone, you give them the power to hurt you—and Langris doesn't want that kind of vulnerability. So I think he just completely counts himself out of the running when it comes to Finesse and defers to his brother—assuming (probably correctly) that she’d choose Finral if she was given a choice between the two of them.

All of that said, he can't quite stop himself from caring for her with a genuine love and respect (not necessarily in a romantic sense but he does care for her)—it’s just sealed off somewhere and not something he really thinks about or allows himself to feel (let alone label) until his brother "declaring war" on him brings all of that to the surface and he kind of has to reconcile how much he wants to be the Head of House Vaude (what he’s worked for his entire life) with how much he wants Lady Finesse to be happy. I love how in that scene there is actually a moment (at least in the anime) in which "the camera" turns and we're watching the scene unfold from Langris' eyes/perspective immediately before he gets involved and tells Finral to clean up his act.

(A/N: If you listen very carefully you can hear the sound of Langris' entire world falling apart...)

Okay, bad jokes aside, this is a huge moment for Langris. It takes him all of five seconds to decide that Lady Finesse's happiness is far more important to him than House Vaude, than his title, his future, his own dreams and aspirations that he has worked for literally his entire life and, ultimately, is more important than everything he has looked to for his own self-worth and fulfillment up unto that point (which causes him to have a bit of an existential crisis as he tries to figure out who he is without those things, without being the next Head of House Vaude, but I digress again). It is an incredible act of love to set aside what someone wants for themselves in order to make another person happy—to choose what is best for another person even at great personal sacrifice. Regardless of how you want to qualify that love (romantic or platonic), it does not diminish the gravity of Langris' sacrifice and the willingness he shows to choose Finesse's happiness over the things that are (seemingly) the most important to him in the world.

Up until this point, Langris is this incredibly goal-oriented character who is set on becoming the best, the strongest, and eventually the head of House Vaude which comes off as self-interested and a little ruthless in his willingness to do whatever it takes to achieve his goals, but suddenly, here he is, ready to give all of that up so that Lady Finesse can have the chance to be happy. It's almost like he is saying (honestly, far louder and clearer than any words possibly could), "I love you more than all of that."

Why else would he be helping his brother take over as heir to House Vaude when that actually seems to be something Langris wants for himself? (I know the poll I ran examined some different ideas and interpretations but that's always been my personal take on it). It’s almost like in that moment, Langris has realized that he can’t make Lady Finesse happy (even if he wants to), but he thinks that Finral can so he wants to make Finral into the best he can be for her.

Once Langris is reasonably sure that Finral is at a place that he can make Finesse happy and has become a man "worthy of her," I could definitely see him stepping aside so that his brother could take over their House and marry her—purely out of concern for Finesse’s happiness, and there is something incredibly selfless and very beautiful about that.

I think Finesse's side of things is much more practical. The fact of the matter is that Finesse is royalty in a medieval society where she will inevitably be married off for a political alliance and/or to produce children, and she has probably always known that she needs to marry out of duty/responsibility, so I can’t really see her as that much of a hopeless romantic given the circumstances. If she allows herself anything, it is the hope that she will get to spend her life with someone who does care for her and who she can be content with. I don't think throughout most of Finesse's life and certainly not throughout this whole arranged marriage business that anyone has ever really asked her what she wanted or ever really cared about her wishes before, but Langris seems to have a genuine interest in her wishes and her happiness more so than anyone else. And I think she does care for him (again, not necessarily in a romantic way but it is a genuine care and concern of at least friendship).

As I discussed in this post, when Langris has all that elf-business and the King threatens to dissolve the betrothal and punish the Vaudes, it is Finesse who comes to their defense rather than taking what is quite possibly her only chance at an "out." And it is an informed, free choice on her part. I love her line in the English dub that she "knows Lord Langris and has no misgivings about him" and therefore essentially begs her uncle not to "judge him too harshly." I think there is something very strong and very courageous in her decision to believe in the good in Langris even when he is at his worst, and her concern is truly and completely focused on what is best for him. I'm especially thinking of that moment when she begs him to stop before he does something he will regret. She's worried about him: his hurt and his guilt. She really wants what's best for him, and it's this love for him and this belief in him that really brings out the best in Langris.

My absolute favorite thing about this ship (besides how selfless they are towards each other) is really that Finesse has this way of bringing out this softer, gentler side of Langris that, I think, very few people have actually seen. Langris himself is so insistent on hiding this (probably a learned response from growing up in an environment where any hint of emotion and any sensitivity is viewed as a weakness), but really he has such a deep capacity for love and given the opportunity would be fiercely loyal.

Langris may not care about a lot of people, but the ones he chooses to care about he will love forever. He's just such a tsun about it, I think, so it can be very hard for anyone (and especially for those with preconceived notions of him as a snotty stick-in-the-mud) to see that he's really very sweet and awkward as heck about his feelings. Langris' love might be quiet—it's not very flashy and usually shows itself in doing little, everyday things for the people he loves—but still waters run very, very deep and he has shown that he would do just about anything to protect the people he loves most and make them happy, no matter what that means for himself. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that he would die for Finesse if it came down to it.

Ultimately, I can imagine a lot of different outcomes for this relationship (some of which never, ever cross over into that romantic place). I really just want them both to be happy whether that means they end up together or not, but yes, I could see them happy with each other in a romantic sense under very specific circumstances since they do have such a selfless love for each other (but I think that is probably a discussion for another time because this is already super, super long so I'm cutting myself off in favor of the next section...).

Why I personally think Langris rather than Finral is better suited for Finesse

As much I don't like pitting ships against each other, I don't think it's avoidable in this case since she is going to be in arranged marriage with one of them. To paraphrase a favorite musical of mine, it's not a matter of "if" but which one. And I think it's best for me to just start off by saying that while I do genuinely like and appreciate Finesse and Finral as a ship as well, I personally think that Langris and Finesse are better suited for one another in the long term.

I will admit upfront that this is in part because of my own personal experiences of having a chronic illness (and needless to say that is a personal bias that colors my opinions, so please just keep that in mind), but I think it's important to talk about the fact that Finesse is chronically ill because it's not something I've ever really seen discussed when talking about ships for her and I really think it should be taken into account. Like Finesse, I have been sick for most of my life, and I can really relate to the kind of difficulties and limitations that Finesse likely experiences due to being chronically ill and the realities of the less active and much more slower-paced life she would lead and, by proxy, the life anyone who married her would have to lead. Again, I am not saying that I don’t like or couldn’t imagine her & Finral together (I do genuinely like that ship too), but I almost think Langris is better suited for her in that he actually wants (or seems to want) the slower-paced life they’d probably have together. For instance, there are likely to be frequent situations that would arise in which Finesse is too ill or too tired to go out and her husband would then be “forced” to stay home with her. With Langris, I think, there would never really need to be much of that feeling of guilt on Finesse’s part or the fear that she is taking away something from Langris or being a burden, because Langris isn’t super sociable and would just want to stay home anyway. In fact, let’s be honest here, he’d probably, actually feel kind of relieved that he has gotten out of unwanted socializing. Whereas Finral is a much more lively and sociable person (rather than an "old soul" like Langris), and though Finral would never, ever want Finesse to feel like a burden or to feel guilty about being sick, I could imagine there is more of that feeling (at least from Finesse’s side) that he has given up a lot more to be with her since his active social life would drastically change as soon as they married.

There's also the matter of the panic Finral would probably have whenever Finesse was ill or having a flare of symptoms. Of course, Langris would be worried as well, but I think because of his personality, he is better able to shelve that and help in a crisis rather than Finral who gets really worked up and then just sort of shuts down. Obviously this is something that can be learned over time, but I just worry that it would be a constant source of stress for Finral which would ultimately make Finesse very worried about him and upset that he is upset on her account. I think Finesse would have a lot of fear that the life she could give a lively, busy, & social person like Finral would be holding him back in some way. The question there is really: will what Finral wants out of life ever gel with the limitations Finesse has to live with? Whereas I don't think that question is as much of an issue with Langris since he is an old soul and incredibly steady, very unlike his more restless, adventurous, and high-energy brother.

I think Langris and Finesse are alike in this way. Though they have many differences in their personalities (and a really nice balance there), they have a lot of similarities in worldview and their attitudes towards life and their life goals—being more traditional, formal, and proper ‘old souls.' Whereas I think she and Finral have more similarities in personality (despite him being much more lively), they’re both incredibly kind, gentle & easy-going people who aren’t particularly ambitious and often make decisions based on what will make other people happy and "keep the peace." But worldview wise he seems much more modern and less traditional than her which I could see causing some tensions since I think they want different things out of life, in a way. It’s almost more important to be alike in life goals/worldview than personality, I think.

I also think Finesse and Langris share common interests and genuinely enjoy each other's company (as we get these glimpses of in the anime where they're just having a quiet, comfortable tea parties together for instance). Even if it started off as an obligation to spend time together because of this arranged marriage they were going to be in, I like to think that eventually Langris and Finesse actually became fairly good friends and came to genuinely enjoy each other's company. I guess it’s a bit unfair to Finral to bring this up since we haven’t seen him spend a lot of time with Finesse so we can't say that they don’t enjoy each other’s company but I just don’t see them having the same shared interests that she would have with Langris.

There is a lot more I could say about these two and their relationship, but I think that's enough ramblings for now. If you read this all the way through to the end, bless you. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. Cheers!! 💖

[incorrectcoldflashblog]

For your character bingo you reblogged, I’m very curious to know your bingo feelingd on either Caitlin Snow or Felicity Smoak (or both! If you’ve got the time — or don’t do bingo at all and hit me with the character analysis narrative I am happy to read it alll).

I feel like these women get a lot of mixed reviews (well Felicity was beloved til she was hated for later seasons poor writing) but I just wanna know your thoughts!

Hi, friend! Thank you so much for the ask <3

Caitlin Snow

I love Caitlin! I know some people don’t, but that always feels more about ship wars than about anything Caitlin actually did? I don’t think DP is necessarily the strongest actress in the cast, but Caitlin’s still a great character, her personality is very distinct, she’s not perfect, she tends to be a little classist, a little uppity, but that’s what makes her compelling. I kinda hate everything I’ve read about what happens to her in the later seasons though — I was really hoping she’d get her happy ending with Ronnie at the eleventh hour *sigh*

Felicity Smoak

Okay, so I’ve only seen the first couple of seasons of Arrow so I can’t speak to the quality of the writing later on, but I loved Felicity when she was first introduced. She had so much personality and she actually made me like Oliver more because she balanced him out perfectly. Emily Bett is so insanely pretty and charismatic, she really brings Felicity to life, so I think it’s sad that the writing apparently got so bad that it ruined her character. Although I’ll be honest, the Arrowverse has a tendency to blame female characters for the bad writing so I’m not entirely convinced that’s even actually true. Either way, I’m comfortable never catching up and just enjoying the version of Felicity that I fell in love with.

Character Bingo

[fourleafclovxr]

10: what it took to get here

“Yara, thank god you’re here,” Agatha sighs, slamming the doors closed behind her. “You might be the only other sane person in this entire castle.”

“That doesn’t bode very well for the future of Camelot, does it,” Yara says dubiously, hefting her bags into a corner. She can see why Agatha would say that, though. Pollux is here, and he was stupid enough to try and get Dovey, of all people, fired. It doesn’t exactly inspire confidence in the rest of the staff.

Agatha laughs, a little maniacally. “It doesn’t!” she exclaims. “But what can I do! I’m just Tedros’ princess, and girls should just shut up and listen to their betters speak, and girls shouldn’t have opinions on anything the men decide—” She breaks off, then, with a huffed exhale. “If I tell them I used to be a boy, do you think they’d shut up?”

Yara sits down on Agatha’s plush carpet, and Agatha follows suit, pulling her knees up to her chest. She doesn’t really look like a princess; she just looks tired, and annoyed, and a little scared. But, as always, she looks very much like herself. Yara has always admired her for that. And that’s the thing, isn’t it?

“You don’t change for anyone,” Yara says. “You don’t do anything for anyone other than yourself. Don’t let their biases force you into— into coming out.”

“Good thing I have you as my lady-in-waiting,” Agatha murmurs. “You’d have been wasted on Tedros.”

“Don't you know it,” Yara says lightly. Lady-in-waiting sounds much better than knight, all things considered. Sends a pleased, comfortable spark through her heart.

“S’pose it’s better that they don’t know, even if it would probably stop a couple of them in their tracks,” Agatha sighs. “They don’t deserve to, anyway. I don’t envy you. I don’t think you’re going to have it easy.”

“Trust me, I’ve heard it all before,” Yara assures her. “That it’s unnatural? That it’s freakish? That we should just stick with what we were born with? I’m over it. I really am. My family’s from Avalon Towers, remember? Even more bigoted version of Camelot, if you ask me.”

Agatha winces. “Right,” she says. “You know, I miss Gavaldon sometimes. I mean, there’s nothing there for me anymore, but at least people there didn’t care about all this. About being a girl, boy, neither, whatever. They hated you for… other things.”

“That’s the way things are, here,” Yara says wryly. “That’s the sort of division our dear Storian loves to capitalise on.”

“Like Evelyn Sader,” Agatha says quietly, lost in thought.

Yara can’t suppress the flinch that jolts through her. Oh, Sader had been a terrible Dean, and objectively an even worse person. She’d taken her idea of advocating for women to the extreme.

But she’d helped Yara. For a price, of course.

But she’d… understood, why Yara might want to be a girl. She’d smiled and nodded and said, being a Girl is a wonderous thing, my dear.

Their school. So beautiful. Yara shudders to think of it. That she would so easily forgive such Evil, if it only meant she could be herself.

She shakes her head firmly. No point in dwelling on it now. Sader is long gone. And Yara, despite everything, has lived this long without her.

This is something she’s made for herself. It was never meant to be anyone else’s.

“They keep trying to doll me up,” Agatha says abruptly, changing the subject entirely. “Make me— well. A better girl. A prettier bride. They complain about my bone structure a lot. My jaw. My shoulders.”

“You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever met,” Yara says sincerely.

“Thanks,” Agatha mumbles, picking at a loose thread in the carpet. She sounds utterly unconvinced. “Just have to work on convincing all of Tedros’ courtiers, now.”

“Hey,” Yara frowns, “look up. Look at me.” Agatha does, blinking in confusion. “If anyone tells you you’re not pretty, I’ll screw with them so hard they come to you begging for mercy.”

“I don’t want to make things harder for Tedros,” Agatha worries.

“He wouldn’t want them to make things harder for you,” Yara points out. “He’s so in love with you it’s stupid. Anyway, you have to set a precedent. You can’t let them walk over you for things like this— what will happen when it’s something bigger? You’re just going to keep your head down?”

“Is it worth it?” Agatha sighs.

Yara stares, incredulously. “Has this castle beaten you down so much already?” she asks. Alright, it’s not particularly sensitive of her. It’s just. This isn’t the Agatha she knows; the Agatha who sat with her in the long days after Evelyn Sader and convinced her not to hate herself for it; the Agatha who was always sure of who she was, who never let anyone tell her otherwise, who never was scared of not fitting in.

“I don’t want to mess this up,” Agatha snaps, finally regaining some of the spark in her eyes. “You think any of this is easy?”

“It’s never going to be easy,” Yara says. “You might as well make it better for yourself. No one else is going to. Except maybe me, but— I’m your lady-in-waiting. I’ll do what you want.” She won’t like it, of course, but she owes Agatha that much.

“Why can’t it be easy?” Agatha says quietly. “People like us. Why don’t we ever get to have it easy?”

“Sometimes I resent it,” Yara admits. “What it took to get here.” It’s not easy. It’s never been easy. She wishes it could have been. “But I would never regret being myself.”

“Do you ever wish you didn’t have to—?” Agatha begins. Trails off. She looks a little lost, like this. A little more her age.

“Wouldn’t be like us, then, would we?” Yara asks. It’s true. It would be much, much easier to just be Tristan— Tristan, skinny and awkward and weird, but very firmly who he was supposed to be. Tristan, who’d been semi-comfortable in his own body, as far as that meant anything in Good. Tristan. Not her.

It took so much to get here, to get to where she is now. And it sucked, yeah. It sucked massively.

But where she is, right now— it feels right. It feels like home. And she would never, ever, go back.

[forlornmelody]

Outlaws Chapter 3 – Teenagers

Rating: E (language, graphic violence. Smut in other chapters.)

Fandom: Titans (2018)

Ship: Jayrose, Jayroy, Rose/Artemis, Poisonquinn, Bella Garten/Pamela Isley

AO3 Links: First Chapter. // This Chapter.

Summary:  Poison Ivy has agreed to help with the search for her copycat killer. Or is it a copycat?

Notes: Chapter title comes from the My Chemical Romance song of the same name.

----

“Where’s my cash?” She wraps her arms around her bare middle. Walking the streets and the alleys in these clothes is a lot easier in a Gotham summer. By now the trees have all but turned, and there’s frost whispering in the air. 

“It’s comin’, sweets. Things are just a little tight right now.” He’s plenty warm in his leather coat and silk scarf. And his beemer probably has seat warmers. If she plays it right, she might get to hitch a ride home. Well, part of the way home. She’d be a fucking idiot if she told this john where she lived.

“You promised me you’d have it by today.” Strangely, the plant behind them doesn’t seem to acknowledge the change of the seasons. It’s as green as spring, if not greener. It almost seems to glow. 

“Shit happens. You know I’m always good for it.”

“I need to pay my rent, Danny.”

“And Danny says you need to shut your fucking mouth before he breaks those pretty little teeth.” He wraps his big hands around her neck, lifting her off the ground. 

“Danny! I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry,” she starts to plead.

“Maybe Danny needs to teach you a lesson, bitch.”

The vines of the plant stir from their other prey, stretching out like spider silk.

“Danny, I–” she screams as Danny’s feet are snatched from beneath him. They envelop him like a net and then they squeeze until Danny’s screams stop.

—

“You cannot be serious.” Barbara fixes him a stare before rummaging through her desk drawer. Where’s that scotch when she needs it?

“She makes a point.” Jason shrugs.

“She’s terrorized Gotham multiple times.”

“And she’s more likely to know who the copycat is.”

“If it’s a copycat.”

Jason leans against the desk. Barbara is half-convinced he’s drunk already at 10 am. Tim told Dick as much after his crash course. Can she blame him, though? It’s a miracle the kid’s alive after all this. “You got any other leads, Babs?”

Scratch scotch. She needs something stronger. “I’m telling you Jason, something’s off. Ivy can’t be trusted.”

“I know.” Jason smiles softly. “I know her better than anyone on your team. She’s my baddie, remember?”

Barbara snorts. “You’re an ex-con yourself.”

“Exactly. I know how these guys–er–gals, think. I’ve got it handled, Babs.”

She sucks on her teeth, already feeling a familiar tension in her shoulders spreading to her neck and the back of her head. “Giving Dick free reign with Crane is exactly what got you into that mess.” 

Jason flinches, just for a split second before he recovers. But the damage is done. 

“Jason–”

“I’m not Dick.” And there he is. The terrified teenager that Bruce picked up off the street, still trying to look braver than he feels. 

Barbara should say no. But it’s impossible to say no to family, isn’t it? “Fine.” Doesn’t make her hate herself any less, though.

The tension eases from Jason’s shoulders, and he sways ever so slightly before he catches himself. “Thanks, Barbara.”

“Don’t.” She wheels herself away from her desk. “This conversation never happened.”

“Never does.”

—

When Babs and Jason get to the van, the rest of the team is already there. Jason moves to get in the backseat, but the driver stops him. “Sorry. The inmate’s gonna go in the back. Arkham rules.”

Jason eyes the rest of the van while Babs maneuvers into the shotgun seat. He folds and hands over her wheelchair without a second thought. And then he sinks inside. There’s only one seat available if Pamela and her two guards are taking the backseat. And it’s next to Deathstroke’s kids. Donna meets Jason’s eyes and winks at him. Winks. Muttering under his breath, Jason settles in next to Rose, who doesn’t even seem to register that he’s there. In fact, she can’t even keep herself awake, despite the energy drink in her hand. The moment Jason buckles his seatbelt, she nods off, resting her head on her brother’s shoulder. Even though there’s at least two inches between them, Jason swears he can feel that familiar buzz of energy between them. Like sticking his finger in a socket. Fuck, this is going to be a long ride. 

“Is this really necessary?” Ivy shifts between a male and a female prison guard, flashing them her trademark smile.

“Standard procedure, Isely.” 

“But Gary, you know I’m harmless with this little accessory.” Arms bound; Ivy cranes her neck to draw attention to her inhibitor collar. 

“Rules are rules.”

“Stop flirting, Gary.”

“Just having some fun, Cheryl.” 

The guards drag Ivy to the backseat, and when her seat belt clicks into place, Ivy leans forward. “You mind?” Inexplicably, she has a tube of lipstick between her teeth. Roy shrugs and applies it to her lips with ease. Almost as if he’s done makeup before. Hm. Ivy eyes herself in the reflection of Artemis’s ax, smacking her lips with a pop. “Thank you.”

“Hey!” Babs snaps. “Give me that.” She holds out her hand until Roy and the rest pass her the stick of lipstick. 

Ivy rolls her eyes. “You know the lipstick itself isn’t toxic, right?”

“Just take us to the crime scene, Carl.”

“Yes ma’am.” The driver gives her an idle salute as the van rolls down the road. 

“You teamed up with Scarecrow!?” Ivy shrieks. The van swerves. Rose jerks awake, her arm bumping into Jason’s.

“Ivy–” Jason starts to say–

“Scarecrow!?” she says, louder this time. Before anyone can say anything, Ivy continues. “That motherfucking, narcissistic, patronizing asshole. You teamed up with him?” 

“Look, I know it was a mistake–”

She manages a sniffle. “I thought I was your favorite.” 

Jericho snorts. 

—

Jericho’s lost track of how many times he’s hit the bag. He’s barely keeping track of the Queen album blaring in the speakers. Right now, Freddie Mercury’s belting about his love for “Fat Bottom Girls,” and Jericho Wilson is trying to locate the same joy in Freddie’s voice. But all he feels at the moment is rage.

Five. Fucking. Years.

A throat clears behind him, and Jericho misses the bag completely. “Your right hook needs work.”

Jericho stops, staring at Adeline pointedly–the punching bag swaying back and forth across his face. “Do you want to talk, or watch me train? Because I can’t do both.”

“It’s been a while since we had a chat.” Adeline Kane sits down on the weight bench, placing a tray with a tea kettle and two cups on the nearby bench press. 

“What do you want?” Jericho grabs a towel, drying his face. T makes it easier to look in the mirror. But it also makes him sweat like mad. Worth it. 

“How are you feeling?” She says it sweetly, but her eyes are almost devoid of warmth. Something happened to her in those five years. Almost like she’s angry with him for dying. Like it’s his fault, and not his father’s.

His hands stop. Adeline doesn’t waste breath. Not anymore. “Takes some getting used to, I guess.”

“It’s a miracle you’re alive, you know.” Adeline pours them two cups, handing him one. “It’s not easy bringing a body out of cryostasis.”

Jericho blows on his tea, not sure where she’s going with this. “Considering all this family put me through? Yeah. A fucking miracle.”

“Language.” Ripe coming from the woman who has likely committed war crimes. 

“The words you use shouldn’t matter. It’s how you use them.”

Adeline sighs. “Just spit it out, Jericho.”

He quirks his head, holding up the cup. 

“You know what I mean.”

“Why did you lie to me about my dad?”

“I was trying to protect you.”

“Bullshit.”

“A son needs to love and respect his father.”

“You just didn't want me in the business!” Most would throw the teacup and shatter it, but even on his angriest days, Jericho prefers to avoid violence. So, he sets the cup, untouched, back on the tray, and storms out. 

—

“Have you slept?” The team medic, Doctor Maya Owens, checks the vitals of her least favorite patient. Her brow furrows skeptically as Rose yawns. 

“Nothing but, Doc.”

Dr. Owens eyes her through her glasses, pressing on Rose’s wrist for her pulse. “Have you slept well?”

Rose lifts her arm begrudgingly, so the medic can wrap the compression sleeve around it, as she considers the question. “Maybe?”

“Blood pressure’s low. How much caffeine have you had today?”

“Five cups. You think it would work better if I sweetened it with cocaine?”

“I think the cocaine would kill you.”

“You’re no fun.” 

“It’s not my job to be fun.” She sighs as she makes some notes in her chart. “Looks like you’re suffering from adrenal fatigue.”

“So, what drugs will you give me?”

Dr. Owens rubs her forehead with her thumb, swiveling her chair to face away from her. “Just lay off the caffeine and try to relax.”

Rose shifts her spinny chair in arcs from side to side. “Not my job to relax.”

“Well, my job is to keep you alive.”

She snorts. “I’m not easy to kill, remember?”

“Death comes for everyone eventually, Rose. Don’t go around tempting him, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

—

“Daddy!” A five-year-old girl beams at Roy from his computer screen. 

“Hi Lian,” Roy smiles back, his hand shaking just slightly beneath his desk, where she can’t see. Damn, she looks more and more like her mother every day. 

How fucking dare you, Roy Harper.

I have to do what’s best for her, Jade. 

Taking a girl away from her mother? 

I’m taking her away from both of us. Making sure she turns out nothing like us. 

“Daddy?” Lian’s eyebrows crease. “You went away again.”

“Sorry, Lian.” Roy swallows, plastering what he hopes is a brave smile on his face. “Daddy’s just tired.”

“I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you, too.” Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t– “Why don’t you show me what you made class today?”

Lian holds up a monstrosity of a construction paper creature, all clashing colors. “Look! He has five teeth!” She holds up five fingers, beaming. “I’m five, too!”

“Yes, Li. Yes, you are.”

Lian’s bedroom door opens, and an apologetic middle-aged woman gently puts a hand on her shoulder. “Sorry, Mr. Harper. But Lian’s got school in the morning.”

Roy glances at the clock. “Oh, sh–crap. Right. Sorry.”

Lian’s foster mom looks up at him. “Same time next week?”

Sooner? Roy wants to say, but he knows they’re busy. Knows he’s busy. “Yeah, that works great. Goodnight Lian. Be a good girl for me, okay? I love you.”

“I love you too, Daddy.”

—

Ah, finally. Donna’s tea has cooled enough to drink. She shouldn’t have caffeine this late at night, but the chai was calling to her. And these leads on Poison Ivy, or not Poison Ivy, as the villainess herself keeps insisting,  aren’t going to follow themselves, are they? Just a little pick me up at the ARGUS computer, and Donna will be all set to go. Just as she’s going to take her first coveted sip, Donna hears a knock at the door jamb behind her. The tea comes this close to spilling onto her lap, and it’s only her reflexes and training that land the mug right side up on the desk. 

“Yeah?” Donna calls out after she stops reeling. 

“Can I talk to you about Rose?” Artemis chews her lip. How very un-Artemis-like. 

“Shit. Did she set the kitchen on fire? Hack the computer again? Booby trap Jericho’s roo-” Artemis stops her with a hand on her shoulder, and Donna, out of habit, violently shrugs it off. She might have accepted the other Amazon as a teammate, but they sure as hell aren’t buddies. Not now, not ever.

“She hasn’t done anything wrong.” Artemis clears her throat. “That I’m aware of.” It might be the hum of the computer, but she swears she hears a crack in her voice. “This is more personal in nature.”

Donna finally turns in her chair, staring at Artemis. “You’re asking me for relationship advice?”

“Why not? You’ve had lovers before, have you not?” Artemis leans against the door frame, her head nearly bumping against the top.

“I mean, yeah, but–” Did a largely un-acted upon whirlwind romance with Garth count?

“Then you can help me.” Artemis leans on the desk, folding her arms. Donna imagines it’s supposed to look confident, if not intimidating but even with the other Amazon’s muscles, she can still see the slouch in her shoulders and the crease in her eyebrows. Now this was not a look she ever expected from Artemis of Bana Migdahl. 

“Eh–”

“How do I get Rose to–how do you say it– ”get serious” with me?”

Donna spits out her tea. “Rose? Wilson?” She sets her mug down, clearing her throat. “You’re kidding.”

Artemis, always completely centered in her gravity, shifts on her feet. “Is that one of your sayings or?”

“You know what she did to Jason, right?”

“She “fleeced” him for information, did she not?”

Donna snorts. “Mythology puns, really?”

Ah, there’s that trademark Artemis smirk. “We both know it’s not a myth.”

Donna rubs her temples. “Right. Okay. What I’m getting at is I don’t think Rose is…. all that romantic.”

“Oh.” Artemis deflates, damn her. 

“Wait, hold on. Does Artemis of Bana Mighdal want romance?”

Artemis levels her a familiar glare “Is that so surprising?”

“It’s just…. you never seemed to stick with one partner very…long.”

“Never mind.” Artemis turns to leave. Donna grabs her hand, stopping her short. She looks up at her, all that fury and resentment of all their years pitted against each other still burning in her eyes. “What?”

“Have you thought about talking to her?”

Artemis doesn’t answer–-she just slips into the hall, letting the door close behind her.

—

The van pulls up to a drainpipe, teeming with greenery. Long, white, and spidery vines crawl over every plant in sight, trapping them like a net. One net contains a distinctly human shape. 

“Oh god.” Donna covers her nose, turning a bit green about the edges. 

Barbara must have completely lost her sense of smell by now. “Fresh crime scene. Have at it.” She waves in the body’s general direction as Jason puts her wheelchair on the ground.

They fan out, and Ivy clears her throat. Jason meets Barbara’s eyes, and her lips press into a thin line. “I better not regret this.”

“Best behavior, Ivy,” Jason murmurs, as he presses the deactivator on her power-dampening collar. 

“Always.” Ivy winks, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. 

She steps forward, turning back to look at them. “Hurry up, would you? I don’t have all n–” Ivy chokes on her next word, and then she doubles over. 

“Is she–?”

And then Ivy screams. She doubles over, falling to her knees. Gasping for air, she chokes out, “I should have had more time.” Her skin pales and glimmers with sweat as she shakes. 

“Ivy?” Jason frowns steps toward her. “You okay?”

Ivy sways as she stands up directly in front of him. The plants around her writhe as she spits out. “Your seas are rising, and your forests are on fire. What is the fucking point of this? As far as I’m concerned, you’re running out of ground to stand on, Robin.” Rose pulls out her swords, Artemis her ax. Roy reaches for his quiver. Even Donna readies her lasso. 

Jason swallows. “I’m not Robin anymore.” 

“Then why are you still acting like a fucking bat?” She glares at Barbara as she gasps for air. “Why are you still running around with pigs like her?”

Jericho steps forward, his eyes losing their color. Roy stops him with a hand. 

“Ivy. I know you’re in a lot of pain. And you’re angry. As you should be.” Jason holds up both hands, his guns still in their holsters. “But right now, I need you to breathe.” He counts to four with one hand, breathing in slowly, holding it for another four, and letting it out at the same count, and holding it for another. 

Ivy’s eyes lose their glow, and the plants around her settle. “Who taught you box breathing?”

Rose looks at Jason, but he avoids her eyes. “Did you see anything we could use to find who murdered those people?”

Ivy turns back to the glowing cuscata, feeding on the basil. She shakes her head, stepping toward it. “One moment,” she says shakily. Stretching out her hand, Ivy says softly, “Hello, little one.

“She talks to them?” Donna whispers to Roy. 

He shrugs. “Don’t ask me. I’m not her bestie like Jason is.”

“Ow.”

“Something wrong?”

Ivy sucks the wound on her thumb, furrowing her brow. “I’m not sure.” 

“Aren’t plants supposed to be your thing?” Rose folds her arms.

“It’s like she doesn’t recognize me,” Ivy mutters, and then jerks her head in their direction. “HEY. They’re not just my thing! I am an agent of the Green–”

The amarbel shivers.

“That isn’t funny. I’m not being funny.” Ivy turns back to the parasitic plant. “What do you mean I’ve been here before?”

Jason’s eyes widen. 

“No, I haven’t.” 

Jericho looks at him. Had Ivy told them the truth or not? Was the former Robin’s faith in her misplaced?

“FINE. Show me who you saw here this morning.”

The amarbel unfurls from its meal, twisting and turning until it takes the shape of a woman, roughly Ivy’s height. She fumes, her fists white knuckled at her sides. “I already told you. It wasn’t me!”

“You gotta admit, Ivy. The resemblance is uncanny.” Roy murmurs softly.

Jason steps forward, stopping at her side. “What’s that on her head?”

That stops Ivy short, as if she’s truly taking in the form of it for the first time. “It’s a crown.”