#and also what chrysi likes because he knows that any version of himself wants to be w her :)

[chryzure-archive]

oh also, new ver of the jacks heart donor au where ummm actually, jacks got vv sick and chrysi kept visiting him in the hospital bc they’re childhood friends and she misses him :(( then they kissed like a week before his surgery, but rather than chrysi saying for certain whether they’re dating now or not (jacks says he might die in a week, so she should be his girlfriend for at least s little bit. chrysi’s not listening to him), she simply says they’ll discuss it when he’s out of the operating room and healthy.

anyway, he dies. that version of him, anyway.

but his body only dies officially for five minutes (that’s rlly pushing it, but it’s okay, it’s fine). turns out—jacks frm another universe would up getting jammed into that body. so! win! sorta! jacks is still alive at least, jst wrong now.

but chrysi knows immediately that it’s the wrong jacks. her jacky was sweeter and he was so excited to call her his girlfriend and he was her best friend. then he died, and what’s worse is that she sensed the moment of death immediately. and now this new version of him is in his body and nobody else knows.

anyway, chrysi’s already lost her jacks. she doesn’t want to lose him again, so she’s willing to be friends w this new jacks (and perhaps… more?)

[alethiometry]

I would like to know 2, 3, and 13 for as a ship to harbor :D

oooh thank you, these are awesome questions!

2: What scene did you first put down?

of the chapters i’ve actually posted, i think it was actually pretty linear? so the first scene of chapter 1, where kass and alexios are chatting outside their house. but more specifically, i think the very very first line i wrote was kass telling alexios that he was born in winter, and alexios just being like “k cool w/e”

but if we’re talking the first scene out of the entire fic, that’s still coming up: it’s a brief dream sequence and i think it’s in chapter 4!

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

He turns his attention skyward, at the scattered stars above. Strange, he thinks. He’s found himself drawn to the night sky for as long as he can remember, wishing that the blackness there, in those dark, quiet spaces between the stars, would swallow him entirely into its cradle of nothing. But now he looks at the stars themselves for what might be the first time since he was a baby, and simply wonders what stories they hold. Wonders if his sister would tell them to him again, if he asked.

this paragraph took me forever to get exactly the way i wanted, but i’m very happy with it now because i think it breaks down exactly what i want to do with alexios’ character development.

okay, rant time. (i don’t think this spoils anything in my fic, if that’s a concern)

i personally think that there’s this strange sort of innocence to post-cult deimos/alexios. like, he’s incredibly traumatized from a lifetime of just straight-up abuse and gaslighting, but underneath all of that is just a man who wants to understand why things are the way they are. he wouldn’t have followed kassandra to andros, or visited her in her prison cell in athens, or returned to mount taygetos where he knew eventually she’d come, if he wasn’t driven primarily by curiosity. he’s slowly realizing just how much of the world was shut off from him, so he’s regaining his agency by seeking out answers to even the most basic things that he was denied. it stands to reason that he probably doesn’t know many bedtime stories, either, because chrysis probably never bothered telling him any, and i thought introducing that thread into my narrative was the perfect way to encapsulate everything he’s been through and everything he’s finally learning is okay to want.

and there’s also the dichotomy between the stars (bright, wondrous, mystical) and the sky (dark, empty, nothingness), if you want to be like me and read wayyyy too much into the imagery of what he’s focusing on as a reflection of his shifting psyche.

(i just really fucking love deimos/alexios okay i could talk about him forever if you let me)

13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

does the odyssey soundtrack count? sometimes i listen to the greek version of the theme song before i start writing, and i find anything by fleet foxes gets me into a general writing mood too (i don’t think that’s specific to this fic though).

i also just recently realized that this song, “for the heart i once had” by nightwish, which i’ve loved for literally ten fucking years, is the perfect deimos song, and it’s been sitting under my nose this entire time! T___T  so i’ll probably be listening to that + the odyssey theme song as i keep working at this fic!

fanfic asks!