#and also jsut bc the appointments are so. fucking difficult to get thru and half the time its just-
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i slept literally all of yesterday so im going to NOT sleep today im going to not do it! im going to fix my sleep schedule! im going to stay awake until 10pm! i will do it!!
#egg.txt#tempted to take a big old dose of traz again and#it didnt WORK last time but listen what if it works this t#<333333#i genuinely just stopped taking it . yeah. uh. uh huh.#it hasnt been helping with sleep or my mood and i jsut.. i dont. yeah.#im supposed to go and get put on sth else at some point but i jsut... gggodd i dont see the point man . you know wht i mean.#both with the: i dont think medication is going to help me in any way;#and also jsut bc the appointments are so. fucking difficult to get thru and half the time its just-#its not even an anxiety thing like god i dont know.#i just find it so damn hard to navigate conversations sometimes and i swear to god its just like ..........#these bitches keep asking questions and its like theyre insisting on answers but idk what the fuck answers they want!! so im just confused#and confused until i give them sth to shut them up BUT HEY. NOT HELPFUL WHEN THEYRE TRYING TO PRESCRIBE U MEDICATION#it jsut feels so............................................ beh. whatever<3#honestly just in general (okay now for the more depressed talk) i dont know its so fuckin funny when its like...#just ask for help!#and fine i got issues with that i know fuckn fine but jsut... i dotn know#every point of help jsut is so ineffective and so much more of a ballache than what its worth#constantly hitting a point of diminishing return#and idk why the hell im still here or doing anything when its just like. im wasting everyones damn time and whilst mine isnt worth shit#its kinda pointless and just frustrating too jsut yeah yeah yeah uh :/
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