#and all joking aside cass is obviously gonna be a great dad and love and care for him

[quarantineddreamer]

Good morning and happy (almost) New Year! I see there’s some ship-hate flying around this morning. Most the time I just ignore this, but today, look: Bix this, Jyn that, blah blah, meanwhile we aren’t even talking about Windi the mother of Cassian’s child? What?!

This absolute crack fic brought to you by the delirium of a (covid) brain past midnight and the amazing humor of the discord crew 💚 (it has been awhile since I laughed so hard, thank you). Anyways, long live Keef Greene Jr our unhinged, chaos brainchild --and may 2023 be the year we learn ‘to each their own’ and let peeps be in fandom... I mean, a gal can dream, right?

Peezo Destiny

There’s something oddly familiar about the kid sitting across from Melshi. He can’t place it. Niamos is barely recognizable from the place he briefly visited after escaping Narkina 5, and yet for some reason this wide-eyed boy staring at him seems like someone he should know.

He’s not sure why he calls out -he should really be focused on collecting the intel he came for and getting back to the Rebel base as seamlessly as possible- but he does. “What’s your problem, kid?”

The boy blinks. He can’t even be ten years old. He might not even be nine, Melshi can’t tell, he’s never been good at reading that sort of thing -if it’s short it’s young if it’s taller it’s old. It’s why he insists on poking fun at Jyn every chance he can get it.

“What are you staring at?” Melshi prompts again. He’s getting worried now, he’s not supposed to be attracting attention. What if the Imps have paid the boy to spy or report on unusual visitors or something?

The boy silently lifts a hand and points to Melshi’s pack where a bright spot of green is poking out. A fruit. Maybe he’s hungry.

Melshi reaches into the pack and throws the fruit in the boy’s direction, hoping it’s enough to get the kid to leave him alone, walk away.

The kid has good reflexes, Melshi will give him that, he catches the fruit easily, but then, unexpectedly, walks over to Melshi and sits beside him on the bench.

Melshi groans as the boy begins to slowly eat his green treat.

“Thank you,” the boy says. “Green’s my favorite.”

“Sure. Okay.” Melshi tries looking away, maybe the kid will leave if he just ignores it. He’s regretting engaging in the first place. What were you thinking, Ruescott? Fool.

Five minutes later and the kid still hasn’t moved. He’s still nibbling at the green skin of the fruit and kicking his legs contentedly, shaking the bench they sit upon. Melshi decides it’s time to leave.

He stands and begins to lift his pack to his shoulders, but the boy calls out, “Wait. Where are you going?” and now he has to look at this kid who can’t take a hint and those eyes are locking onto his face again and there’s still something so familiar about it.

“Don’t you think you should head home, kid? Your parents are probably worried about you.”

“No. My mom’s gone.”

“Gone?” Melshi asks, exasperated. “Gone where?”

The boy shrugs. “Gone. She told me I had to stay while she got more greenie greens.”

What the fuck... “Uhh… okay. Is she coming back soon?”

The boy shrugs again and takes another bite.

“How long has she been gone?”

Another shrug. “A long time.”

Melshi sighs. Trying to get information out of the kid is like trying to get Cass to... His train of thought hits a brick wall and keeps rolling, because he thinks he’s realized what it is about the child that’s so familiar. “What’s your name, kid?”

“Keef. Keef Greene Jr,” the boy says rather proudly -though Melshi’s not sure what there is to be proud of, it’s kind of a shit name. It does however, give him resolution to the nagging familiarity of the strange child.

A grin spreads across Melshi’s face. “Keef, kid, you’re coming with me. There’s someone I want you to meet...”

——

Melshi marches Keef across the hangar, the young thing with the short legs barely keeping up with his long ones.

Cass is working on his ship with Jyn and K2, his legs sticking out from under as he messes with something underneath.

“Keef!” Melshi calls loudly and there’s the thunk of head hitting metal and a stream of loud curses as Cassian startles.

“I told you not to call me that-“ Cassian begins, sliding out from under the ship, rubbing at his forehead. He stops short when he sees the strange boy standing beside Melshi. “Who’s that?”

“This? Oh,” Melshi places a hand on Keef Jr’s shoulder. “This is Keef. Keef Greene Jr.”

He waits for the news to register with his friend, but it is Jyn who reacts first with a laugh. “Didn’t you say Keef was your alias when you met... Oh. Oh by the force. Are you serious?” She steals another glance at the kid, squinting. “You are serious.”

“Cass, you were on Niamos for what, a day? Before you ended up in Narkina 5?” Melshi prods.

“I..”

“It is not statistically improbable depending on frequency of-“

“Nope! You can stop there, Kay!” Cass shouts loudly and he’s as flushed and flustered as Melshi has ever seen him.

“The physical appearance suggests shared genetics,” K2 adds, unable to help himself.

“He’s right, Cass,” Jyn says. “That kid looks alot like you.” Her face softens and she steps towards Keef Jr who has not said a word this entire time. “Hi, my name is Jyn.”

“I’m Keef Greene Jr.”

“I heard!”

Cassian approaches Melshi while Jyn continues to converse with the boy. “You couldn’t have given me a little heads up, Melsh?”

“Where’s the fun in that, Dad.”

“Stop. This is serious.”

“You’re right it is. You’ve passed on a truly terrible name to this sweet innocent child. How could you?!”

“Melsh!”

“What?”

“What am I going to do?”

“Well, first things first,” Jyn jumps in, a hand resting on the boy’s head. The kid seems to have already taken a liking to her. “Keith here says he’s hungry.”

“Keith?”

“Keith,”  Jyn repeats. “The kid’s already lost a mother, I’m not making him suffer your horrible alias on top of that.” Her eyes flash to Melshi. “Keith Ruescott Andor.”

“Hey! He’s not my kid.”

“No, but you knew his father so well.”

“Oh, you mean his father Keef Girgo?”

Melshi barely avoids the hunk of metal Cassian chucks at his head.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Not that I don't appreciate the gesture Janis: But you didn't need to go full Van Gogh to get my attention, like Jimmy joined the chat 5 hours ago Jimmy: Not my first thought when I decided on giving you the finger either like Jimmy: Suffering for my art on day one though. #committed Janis: Says even more about your artistic temperament, that Janis: Gotta be to something eh now we're officially on the radar for being on the rocks Janis: Are you okay forreal though? Playground stories vastly differing from a scratch to amputation Jimmy: Yeah. Could ask you the same since there's no grapevine for me to rely on about the Janis Cavante enigma Janis: What can I say? If only the game hadn't gone to shit Janis: I'm alright, just family stuff Jimmy: 👌 Janis: When you gonna be my mate again? Janis: I'm sorry for whatever I said that got to you but I can't un-say it now, can I? Janis: I didn't mean to get so heavy, like, you know I was hanging Jimmy: When have I ever been your mate? 😏💕😍 Friendzone better than no zone but #savage Jimmy: Cheers for the warning, bit late but Janis: Shut up Janis: OBVIOUSLY I was just gonna seduce you when I saw ya again Janis: but you gotta ruin it 😕 idk, are you even committed to the #goal anymore? Jimmy: why your surprised? Got form at that, don't I? Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: Course I am #rideordie obvs 😎 Janis: Not that I recall 🤔 Thought I was the one that couldn't read a situation Janis: Why you coming for my 👑? You've got no chance I'm FAR more hopeless than you Jimmy: You don't get to take that win. Sorry 🏆💪 All mine Janis: You're impossible 💘 Jimmy: Missed you too 💕 Janis: Maybe a tad 😉 Janis: If I tell you I did and no faking Janis: You gonna put the knife down? Jimmy: 👌 Janis: What you being a prick for? Janis: Not gonna let you off that easy soz Janis: Use your words Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: I'm still a prick though. Sorry. You won't get off that easy 😏 Janis: Yeah but that's how I like you Janis: Weren't working under some illusion you were alright like Janis: so what's up??? Jimmy: Nothing now Jimmy: What's up with you? Janis: 😤 Janis: Aside from talking to a brick wall I'm grand, boy Janis: Trying to wrack my brain for what I did or said...any hints? Jimmy: It was nowt I'm just a moody git Jimmy: don't worry about it Janis: Nah it wasn't Janis: 'Cos I was in a mood that day from the off and you were trying for ages Janis: and I don't think you were just mardy at me for spoiling the day 'cos you know I'm a prick too Janis: No surprises Jimmy: It wasn't you. My dad just does my head in, you know Jimmy: all that shit Janis: Alright, makes sense Janis: When he finally rolled in was he solo then? Jimmy: Nah Janis: Shit Janis: I'm sorry Janis: Could've given you warning but 'course not...was Bobby in bed at least? Jimmy: Not your fault Jimmy: Yeah, with me, thankfully. He hasn't gone in me dad's room for ages Jimmy: Cass of course knows it all Janis: Still Janis: That's one good for now at least then Janis: Yeah no fooling her...I thought she seemed off when I was coming to get Twix but not enough that I clocked Janis: That's shit, Jim Jimmy: Except she thought the woman was a prozzie, asked her how much pops was paying and all that Jimmy: Funny but not facts Jimmy: no chance of paying her off Jimmy: What's going on at your gaff then? Janis: Oh God Janis: point 1 to Cass 😂 Janis: Know I shouldn't be laughing but Christ Janis: Not trying to be #fitandmysterious about it but it ain't my shit to tell Janis: Nothing that ain't survivable just something shit but that's par for the course init Jimmy: Go on, I had a good laugh. Still am. Gotta, like. Jimmy: Yeah. With you there Jimmy: Twix probs won't take no for an answer but she's a good secret keeper so it'll be alright Janis: Yeah, if your life Da insists your life has gotta be a hilarious evil step-witch Disney romp Janis: May as well be in on the joke Janis: Twix could really stir the pot if she wanted Janis: get me to herself like she really wants Jimmy: Don't suppose you fancy a front row seat do you? My dad's talking about having her over for dinner and if Cass can't put a stop to it, I think she'd like you there Jimmy: Bring Grace too if you want, Bobby hasn't shut up about her. Like she's his girlfriend or something Jimmy: Once Twix gets under the table the woman'll be well outnumbered Janis: Bless him, he really cheered her up too Janis: Would be mildly amusing to outshine his big news with that wtf pairing, sure Janis: I can be there, if Cass wants Janis: Great at fucking up family dinners, like Jimmy: #therealOTP Jimmy: Gracie doing alright now, yeah? Barely recognised her at the park before Jimmy: It's been a while but I think I can still remember how to do it too. I got your back Janis: Yeah, she'll be alright, just a bit of a rough time rn Janis: Same tbh but gotta be like riding a bike Janis: we so good at fucking up other stuff yeah? Jimmy: Gotta be, she managed to look down at Tammy earlier, no easy feat Jimmy: Yeah 🏆💪 Jimmy: 🎻 Janis: She's well shot of her Janis: although she's just the monkey not the organ grinder Janis: need the rosetta stone to talk to you sometimes boy 🙄😂 Jimmy: If that's your way of telling me you're magic, I'm not surprised 😜 Jimmy: Love it if you cursed Mia this term tbh Janis: You'd think that face was curse enough Janis: 😑 Janis: but y'all have 0 standards Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Mine are 🥇 Jimmy: wouldn't even fake date her, mate Janis: Well you talk a big game but don't you always Janis: #allforshow? Janis: Oh I forgot, just tall Tam who made the cut was it? Janis: 😏 Jimmy: shut up Janis: Nah don't be ashamed we've all got a past to rip the piss out of Janis: At least you didn't end up sharing a lad with your sister Janis: Thanks for that one Gracie 👍 Jimmy: Still time, Cass don't even like lads yet 👍 Janis: Why would you wish your taste on poor Cass? Janis: Don't even 😂 Jimmy: Too late, mate she's already loving ya Janis: 1/3 ain't bad 💪 Jimmy: I'll let her know Janis: I would aim for the full set but Gracie cockblocking again so 🤷 Jimmy: Gotta step your game up, mate. Jimmy: Such a loser like Janis: Excuse me Janis: you're 3/3 by default don't shout about it Jimmy: 😎 Janis: wanna try for my full set? Janis: doubt it Jimmy: Bring it on, hun Janis: did you just hun at me Jimmy: yeah, channeling my inner Gracie since she bested TT and I just got the 💋 of death like Janis: tragic 💅 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: what we doing now i'm outta school early Janis: Hmm Janis: Picking up where we left off? Or new challenge? Jimmy: I'm always about trying new stuff 👍 Janis: Ooh Janis: Adventurous Janis: #keepingitfresh Jimmy: 😏 gotta now we're #keepingitreal Janis: can't let the haterz just hate can you? #winningemback1hashtagatatime Jimmy: Such a winner, can't help it Janis: Pfft. Jimmy: you coming to find me then? left you a blood trail and everything Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Who could resist such a sexy offer? Janis: I've got to get out of this lesson first Janis: Time me Jimmy: ⏲ Jimmy: go Janis: *Should have asked where he was, but it was too late for that now and thus, just another part of the game. She wasn't losing by default of asking, thanks. Logically, wasn't going to make her go anywhere near the Head or the classrooms...So that left the smoking hole, already waiting outside the gates or...the bogs? Best place to check first before venturing out. There was the lot in the Science block, the ones in the Humanities and the ones upstairs. If only she was as obsessed as she felt on her bad days to have his schedule memorized so she could pick the most likely of the lot. As it was, she just made it to the closest, like she had a place to be. First lot was a bust, just someone having a sneaky shit and keeping dead silent in reply to her 'Jim?', oops, soz mate. Exiting sharpish, Janis jogged down the corridor to the next, seeing him as soon as she entered, checking himself out in the mirrors; She smirks, walking over to the sinks and seating herself down on one to face him. She grabs his hands (gently) to assess the damage (not too bad, thank God), cocking a brow.* How'd I do? Jimmy: *Once the app's pressed, his phone's away and he's focused on his own (self imposed) race against time. The clean up. The sooner this bollocks was done the faster they could get out of here and onto the next. Whenever and whatever that is. Jimmy didn't try and guess, how things have been panning out lately like. He knows, without glancing down at his hand that it looks worse than it is, and easy to sort. No chance of calling what's happening with him and this girl anything close. Jimmy shrugs, to get it out of his system, he tells himself, 'cause no more of that shit. Not for a bit, after before. Then shakes his head, uninjured hand running through his hair. The briefest flash of a smile that there's no shame in. He's just glad she's willing to show up again and 'cause she is, he won't let himself keep slipping. Try hard move, but how he feels. There's more of the same when he hears someone come in, realizing it's her, and moves closer, hands still connected until he's standing between where her legs dangle off porcelain. It's a position to tease if he wants, and probably he will, keeping that familiar tone going for as long as they'll both allow, but first he answers her question, pulling his phone out with his own raised eyebrows poised. * 6 flat. Not bad, mate. * He breathes it out, counting himself, up to the moment when he kisses her. Fast enough to shut her up before she can make any claims to victory, yeah, but mostly he just wants to. Slowly. Needs to. She's earned it by being here. Or he's owed it for getting too far in the line of fire. It doesn't matter. Not yet.* Janis: *Janis inhales sharply as he moves closer, holding the breath in tight as so to hold him in place too. Stay. It's not just a matter of closeness though, is the problem. With a Family like hers, you were used to touchy-feely, (back in the day, when she still allowed it from any of 'em, like), but this was about the places he was able to get close...Where no one else ever had. And she wasn't just being literal, all relevant body parts ignited by his touch, it was the other shit too, head space and fucking...soul space, occupying space and time in her life she'd given to no one before him. It was terrifying, 'course, it was also fucking exhilarating. Why else would she? Up for the challenge, yeah? In this moment, here and now, absofuckinglutely. Try and stop me. Doubts and dread could be saved for later, when he was gone again. Something about him demanded her full attention, and she didn't hate the distraction of it, of him, AT ALL. She laced her legs 'round his back using them to pull him closer still. But she won't be the one to start it. She still can't. Not got the bottle to be sure he wants it too. Tragic, as her twin would say. Sure she'd feel more tragic if he pulled back, though.* New record, I reckon... *Barely focused on her own words as she murmurs them into his ear, thin fingers running through his dark hair, messing up what she had caught him fixing.* I like you better like this. Jimmy: *He meets her first unspoken challenge immediately, his easiest yet. Pushing as she pulls, but not away, both of them in a rhythm that only hurts a bit, from his hand, safe to ignore (like he gives a shit right now if it was about to fall off). No other alarm bells, thank fuck, 'cause that's sorted. Done. Jimmy grins into her skin as her softly spoken words tickle his, eyebrows raising themselves to let her know he's unconvinced, that what he 'reckons' is that he could beat it. (If it means getting to her.) Another bet he's ready to place if it's ever laid down. *You do, do you?* His tone has a smirk in it, seconds before it reaches his face, changing the smile as he moves effortlessly, no need to stretch as his own fingers retrace the path of hers, on her, until the ponytail she had in is loosened and the curls falling free. *Touche* Janis: *She laughs softly, this lowering the risk of omitting any other noise, more incriminating AND more shaming, so she reckoned. Bemused face to match, challenging him to 'be careful!' and praying he'll ignore her, breaking School property or falling on her arse be damned, frankly. Janis tuts the kind of 'oh, please! tut of someone not at all interested in having him leave even just so to come back as fast as possible. No more running. Not today. She tightens her grip on him to say as much, tugging playfully at his hair as he messes with hers.* Oi! *She allows it though, enjoying the relief of letting out the too-tight hairband, literal letting down of the hair how cliche they were...Who cares? Not her. She plays otherwise though, pouting like a stroppy kid and blowing a wayward curl out of her eyes.* Look what a mess you've made, boy... *She smiles, bending her head down, curls falling and exposing the nape of her neck, to 'kiss it better'. Light kisses trailing the slip of his knife, even though it was still a bit bloody, she liked the metallic taste of it and pale red stain he left on her lips. She looks up, bigger smile still. God, she wanted him so bad.* Jimmy: *Damn. There's things running through his mind that he could do to 'get her back for this' or 'raise the stakes' and about as many that he shouldn't, like how simple it'd be to 'clean up' again by letting the tap run and flicking as much water as he can whilst not letting go of her a millimeter. That thought could fuck right off. Stupid risk. He doesn't want either of them to cool off and it's too late for that seconds after. So he thinks then, much as he can form any coherent thoughts with THAT happening. A shuddering breath slips out (that she'll no doubt call a moan to ensure her victory when her mind's back on that) covering the sound of the bathroom door opening. Until there's an explosion of noise. Shit. Still existing purely on reactions, empty headed and dizzy, he lifts her off the sink, pulling her protectively against his side in the same movement. His body won't do anything else that it's supposed to, chest too tight and airless to get any words out, defense or attack. Just as well when he finally realises who it is. Fucking hell. All the same, the urge is there to run, persistent and he shoots her a look, daring her to listen to his idea instead of the teacher's rant. This challenge is probably one too far, but anything from Janis and he'll get it done, making sure they both get out.* Janis: *Another cliche, everything happening so fast that it feels like you're running (crawling more like) on slow-mo. Its like they're so fucking close to closing the last of the space but in the seeming eternity between this desperately needed contact finally happening, someone has managed to barge in and spoil everything before Janis had chance to blink. If it had been another kid, (depending on who, of course), she probably could have told them to piss off and then they could continue but that 'someone' being a teacher did somewhat bring her back down into harsh reality with a dull thud. That, and Jimmy lifting her off the sink with lightning speed reaction. Nice. She hid her appreciative smirk, vowing to show him just how appreciative she was when they were alone again. However, she still managed to catch his eye, and catch on to what he was silently saying as teach got louder and louder, realising they weren't listening to him. It was now or never. Realization jolting her back into the here and now, she took his (good) hand (much to the horror of Mr. Lucas when he clocked it, too little too late) and squeezed it tight to say 'Leg it!' And she did just that, pulling Jim with, exit in sight.*