#and a friend of mine designed Kris' for me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

a-heart-attack-ow · 9 months ago

Text

The Arrangement. Part nine

Part Eight

Part Nine: Smut/Unedited

A line of unmarked black cars cascaded up the winding driveway of our estate. A parade of cars that seemed like an ominous omen of what was to come next. I stand there, looking out the gigantic circular window overlooking the front lawn, my eyes tired from the night before. Colby Brock had called in his associates for whatever he had planned to do next.

Regardless of the consequences.

I shake the thought from my head as a quiet voice comes from behind me.

“Are you ready?”

Sam rasps, his hand on the small of my back. I glance over my shoulder and breathe a deep sigh. He looked at me slowly, noting what I was wearing. A pair of skinny jeans, oxfords, and a blue sweater. Kris had put my hair up in a half up and down look, the updo part supported by a blue bow, which looked like something Belle from Beauty and the Beast would wear. It was a more casual look but I figured I didn’t need to dress up for whatever revenge plot Colby was cooking up. It was clothing that I would’ve worn before my new life started a year ago.

Clothing that felt more like me for the first time in so long.

I nod feebly and turn to face him, our eyes meeting. For a moment he allowed his eyes to drift to my stomach, the nonexistent baby bump was almost enough for me to believe I’d dreamed everything up. But the blood test I’d taken confirmed it, I was pregnant.

I was pregnant with Colby Brock’s baby.

Though no one could tell yet, it was still too early. A look moves to Sam’s face as he reaches forward to place a hand on the side of my face. For a moment I froze, because he never touched me like this. He breathes a deep sigh, his thumb lightly grazing my cheekbone. He swallows hard when he sees the look of confusion move to my eyes and then he moves his hand from me. It looks like there’s something he wants to tell me, but he doesn’t. It's the same look that I’d seen once or twice throughout the duration of my first year of marriage. My marriage to his best friend and adopted brother.

“Sam? Is something wrong?”

I ask. Genuine concern starts to overtake me as I look at him. I don’t know what’s got him being like this with me. I don’t know if it's because he found out I was pregnant two days ago and he was being a protective friend or if he knew something I didn’t know. Whatever it was, it caused me great pain to see him looking at me like this.

At first he doesn't respond, only takes my hands in his, his thumb tracing over the wedding ring and wedding band that I haven’t taken off since I got married. He traces the gaudy design in silence for several minutes before he dares to look up at me.

“Colby is so lucky to have you...”

He sounds almost bitter when he says this.

“... He’s always been so careless when it comes to loving someone. Always seemed to be in it for the sex and he didn’t care who he fucked over in the process. He’s hurt a lot of people in pursuit of his own desires, but with you…”

He pauses once more, his hands gripping mine a little firmer. As if to drive his point home.

“... With you he’s been so different. But if he ever does anything to hurt you again I don’t think I could forgive him. I love him too much to let him make that mistake and I love you too much to let him treat you that way…”

At first I think he’s saying he loves me like a sister-in-law, but when he looks at me he continues speaking.

“... Over the past seven months, when Colby got distant with you, when we started spending everyday together hanging out, that’s when I fell for you. When you came home from that event sobbing I wanted to hit him, seeing you upset because of him, drove me insane. I love you and I just wanted to say it out loud once.”

His admission causes my heart to skip a beat and for shock to reach my face. For a few minutes neither of us speaks as we study each other closely. I don’t know what has brought this on, but I knew that we didn’t have the time to get into this now. I knew that I didn’t feel the same way about him. Even if he was one of the best people I’d ever known, Colby was my person and nothing was going to change that.

“Sam, I’m sorry. I-”

I attempt to say, but he cuts me off with a small smile.

“I know you love him and I know that it was wrong for me to get those feelings. I will deal with my shit, but I just wanted you to know because keeping it to myself had been really fucking hard Emilia.”

I smile back at him and give his hands a firm squeeze this time. Sam had become the brother I always wanted and I felt bad that this had happened. But I was glad that he understood how I felt.

“I already told Colby.”

He rasps quietly, his eyes on the ground in shame. I feel my stomach drop for a moment as I try to mentally picture how my husband handled that conversation.

“Oh?”

Is all I can manage in response, my eyes searching Sam’s face for any sort of indication of how it went. Especially since Colby hadn’t bothered to tell me what his best friend and adopted brother had said. Sam sighs moving his hands from mine to swoop his bangs to the side, exposing a black and blue fist sized bruise on the side of his head. My jaw drops as my hands move to my mouth in shock. I only get a good look at it for a second before he swoops his bangs back into place.

“I’m sorry he hurt you.”

I manage softly, his shoulders shrugging like it’s no big deal.

“Can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same thing if another guy who was close with my wife told me he was in love with her. I’m sorry to spring things on you. I just had to get it off of my chest.”

I give him another small smile as Celina’s voice carries up the stairs, my eyes meeting hers at the bottom when I look around Sam.

“Get down here you two.”

He breathes a sigh and extends his arm to link with mine so we can go down the stairs. When I link with him, he makes sure to slowly guide me down the stairs.

“You know I’m not that pregnant that I can’t manage the stairs.”

I whisper to him, with a playful grin on my face. He rolls his eyes and smiles back.

“You’re literally carrying precious cargo. I’m not risking you tripping down these stairs. I’m already on Colby’s shit list and that’s the last thing I need.”

I can’t help but laugh at the logic, a deep hearty laugh that I needed to release after that brief moment of tension up stairs. A laugh that Sam returns. However, my husband’s face looks less enthused when we reach the bottom of the stairs and he sees us both cracking up. Jealousy seems to find a home in his eyes when Sam and I unlink arms and I make my way over to him. He stares at his brother for a few seconds before leaning down to press his lips to mine. Pulling my body in against his as he deepens the kiss. Putting on a show in front of his brother as if to say ‘she’s mine’. I break the kiss when I realize what he’s doing and our eyes meet.

“Colbs. Everyone already knows who I belong to.”

I whisper just for him to hear, his eyes fixated on me. His breathing is uneven and I can see the lust burning deep within him. He likes it when I say that I belong to him, likes it even better when I say it and he’s deep inside of me. I smirk up at him, through innocent eyes that seem to taunt him.

“Baby, you’re playing a dangerous game…”

He growls back at me, as quietly as I had spoken moments before.

“... When this meeting is over. I’m going to fuck you so hard you never doubt who you belong to.”

A chill moves up my spine at his words, but I don’t let any physical reaction show as I take a step back. I look over my shoulder, into the living room and sigh when I look at his friends who’d come today. All of them were doing their own thing, Sam just now joining them. I didn’t know why Colby had invited Corey, Johnnie, Jake, and Nate, but I didn't question it. He told me not to, so I didn’t. I knew that I needed to keep my head down and focus on our baby, not whatever was up his sleeve.

“Hey Kris and Celina?”

Colby asks, the two girls moving from the living room where everyone else is. Joining us as Colby takes a step back from me.

“Do you think you two could distract my wife for a few hours? I have an important meeting I’m going to be holding in my office. I don’t want her getting any ideas about eavesdropping.”

He shoots me a playful look before turning his attention to the girls. They answer him back with friendly ‘sures’ and he gives me one last kiss on the forehead before going into the living room. He tells the guys they’re going to be going into his office and they all leave without so much as a second glance. Leaving us all alone.

“Anyone feel like that was a little sexist?”

Kris jokes, Celina and I laughing. It felt weird for sure. Why would I need to be distracted? Was this work related? What did he need to talk about that I couldn’t hear about? I tried to consider that maybe he was just trying to keep me from stressing out and that’s why he didn’t want me near the meeting. I look at the girls and smile. I can’t think of what to say to them, suddenly feeling awkward, so I decide to try and get out of the house.

“Anyone want to go for a walk? I’ve lived here for over a year and I still haven’t seen all of the grounds. It might be nice to make this place feel more like a home.”

Celina looks from me to Kris with a look of suspicion. Knowing full well that this home felt more like a museum I was forced to stay in than a real home.

“We can, but I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”

Celina says, her eyes narrowing at me for a moment. She can see right through me and I’m too excited to not say anything.

“I’m pregnant.”

I say with a small smile, hoping they don’t judge me too harshly. They might not have said it out loud, but I’d seen the looks they’d give Colby when he was an ass. They’d seen the way that he treated me and they’d seen how hard this adjustment had been. Now, having a baby just took that adjustment up several notches.

They both look at me in genuine shock. Both faces look serious as they process what I’ve said. Something that makes me wish I hadn’t said anything at all. My smiles fades and I look at the two of them feeling any joy I felt flee.

“Is he going to step up?”

Is all Kris asks, her face slightly more sympathetic now that she sees how the joy I’d been feeling has faded.

“He says that he is.”

My voice replies, sounding small and slightly ashamed. They probably thought I was ridiculous for being excited for even a moment. They knew that our relationship had been volatile at times. They knew that the main focus of our relationship was sex, but they didn’t know that it was loving too. That was something that we hadn’t been great at showing others, it was even harder when Colby pulled his latest bullshit. I realize they were right to be weary and I have to remind myself to be weary too. I have to remind myself that he still needed to prove himself to me.

“He better or Sam might kill him...”

Celina states, more to herself than anyone else, a statement that earns a look from Kris. A look that tells me they were well aware of how Sam felt about me.

“Did he tell you guys?”

I ask, my voice unable to hide the shock I feel. Did everyone know about this before I did?

“...We’re really close friends and we have been for the past five years. Colby’s always been distant and doing his own thing, but Sam is the reason we started working here. He’s the only one who’s ever taken the time to actually talk to us and not just boss us around.”

Mentally, I think back to every interaction Colby has had with both Kris and Celina and realize, to my horror, that they were right. He didn’t treat them like friends, even if he let them come over and spend time with me or Sam. He kept everyone at arm’s length until he needed something from them. A thought that I’d had on more than one occasion.

About my own relationship with him.

“I’m sorry.”

I whisper, feeling selfish and idiotic. I couldn’t understand how I could quickly forget his shortcomings. Was I willingly allowing him to treat the people I cared about like this? What would I do if he was like this with our child?

“You don’t need to say sorry. We’re sorry for being negative. We are happy for you and I know that you’re going to be an amazing mom.We just want him to be better for you.”

Kris says this hopefully, as if her words can take away the mixed emotions falling over me. My eyes meet both of the women standing in front of me, their eyes more sympathetic with fake encouragement laced on their face and suddenly I don’t want to hangout with anyone anymore. Regardless of what Kris had just said to me. Suddenly I just want to go upstairs and cry myself to sleep.

–

Everyone leaves eight hours later.

The house is eerily quiet as I stood in the kitchen all alone. I’d sent Celina and Kris home for dinner, along with our kitchen staff. I didn’t like relying on other people to do everything for me. It didn’t feel right, I used to cook for my dad every night. I used to clean for fun (all while listening to my cleaning playlist on my phone). I used to do so much more than be a doll who dressed up and did what she was told. So I stood in the kitchen with cooked jumbo shells and a bowl of ricotta filling. It had been so long since I made stuffed shells and it made me think of my dad. It was his favorite thing I cooked. The thought of him tugs at my heartstrings, my eyes watering as I fill the shells up and start lining them in the pan. I hum to myself to fill the silence and fall into a steady pace as I fill the pan. Once I’ve filled it with the shells, I open the tomato sauce and cover the shells and add the mozzarella on top. I slide the food into the oven and breathe a deep sigh.

“Okay, now it just needs to cook for 25 minutes.”

I whisper to myself, my focus turning to the sink behind me. I begin to wash the dishes I’ve dirtied when I hear a loud sound come from behind me. The sound of voices shouting from behind a closed door. I want to investigate but know that I can’t leave the food unwatched. I breathe another deep sigh and dry my hands off. Grabbing the pot holders I slide them on and take the food out of the oven. Once it’s safely out and set on top of the stove I investigate the sound of shouting I’d heard before.

Down the long corridor connecting that leads out of the kitchen is Colby’s office door, which is where the sounds of shouting were coming from. The rest of the guests had left over an hour ago, but Sam had remained in the office. From where I am standing I can’t quite make out what is being said, but the muffled voices are booming from the otherside. Out of curiosity I place my ear against the door, my focus on whatever words I can pick up.

“This will work Sam!”

Colby’s voice sounds like venom when he speaks, each letter biting.

“If we follow the plan then Emilia’s father will be safe. We just have to get him to the safe house. If we take away the leverage they have over her then that’s a start. We just have to plan how it won’t get tracked back to us.”

I feel my heart start to beat in my chest when I hear the sound of Colby’s voice talking about my father. What were they planning? I hear Sam sigh, his voice tired as if they’d gone over what to do for hours.

“I think the plan of attack needs to come from me. Mom and dad have always been blind to any of the things I’ve done that are unsavory. They act like I'm an angel or something, but it’s my fault that we are even in this position in the first place.”

My heartbeat quickens when I hear him say this. From the other side of the door I hear Colby breathe a deep sigh. A dangerous growl that seems to indicate that he’s on the verge of losing it on his brother.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

He asks Sam in confusion. Sam lets out a bitter laugh, like he’s uncomfortable with what he’s going to admit to.

“Mom and dad let it slip that someone stole money from them. They needed someone to scare the person who owed them money. They didn’t go to you because they’ve been pissed at you since you went blabbing to some reporter when you were drunk at the bar. So, they sent me out. Gave me a gun that is identical to a real gun and I broke into some guy's house and intended on scaring him into paying mom and dad back. His daughter came home and started begging for me not to hurt him. She’d just come home from a night class and she looked so fucking scared and I didn’t mean to scare her. But then she offered herself up to spare his life and I had an idea. Mom and dad had been planning to put you in an arranged marriage for months and when I saw her. This beautiful, green-eyed, sweet little thing I knew that she would be perfect for you.”

I feel sick hearing Sam speak. The night replaying in my mind. The night I’d come home and saw a masked man with a gun to my father’s head. The blue eyes that had looked back at me as I offered myself up to save my dad. The man who laughed in my face and told me he knew what he was going to do with me was Sam.

The Sam that held me through the roughest moments of my life. Who’d become my best friend here. The man who’d told me he was in love with me hours ago. He was the reason I was here now. He was the reason I entered into this marriage. He was the reason for all of it and it made me sick. Because I trusted him more than anything and he’d done this. I cover my mouth to hold in the tears that escape me.

“You helped cause all of this?”

Colby asks in disbelief. Shock is laced into his words and I can only imagine the look he’s giving his brother. Whatever he’s doing Sam is quick to defend himself.

“You should be thanking me. Honestly, she’s perfect for you and for our family. When I saw her I knew you’d like her. She’s your type only better because she’s not a random skank who is going to ruin our family’s image. She’s perfect, beautiful, kind, and you wouldn’t be with her had I not made an executive decision.”

I feel sick. My stomach turns and I don’t know how to feel. Yes, I’d met the love of my life because of Sam. But my dad, my entire world, was getting hurt because of it. I keep my mouth covered as Sam speaks again.

“Remember what I did for you the next time your fucking her sweet little pussy. Remember what I did for you whenever the tabloids have something nice to say about you for once. And remember that, had it not been for me, you would’ve ended up with someone who wouldn’t have played by the rules. Our sweet little Emilia is the only one who could’ve gotten us here. She’s bringing new life to our family and it’s all because I made it so.”

The way he says our makes the hair on my neck stand on end. Like they both own me. With shaking hands I go to grab the door knob, my hand resting on the cold gold for a moment. Colby says something harsh to Sam, but I can’t bring myself to listen to the words. Instead, I move my hand from the door knob and walk away.

Clinging to the wall of the corridor I retreat back to the kitchen. I put the food back into the oven and stood there in utter shock. I hear the office door open and the shouting resumes, but travels away from me. As if Colby is kicking Sam out for the night. The front door slams so loud that it almost feels like the house is going to crumble around it. I tremble as I hear Colby’s feet travel down the hallway.

“My love?”

He calls, when he’s unsure of where I’ve gone. With a shaking breath I reply out of fear of worrying him.

“I’m in the kitchen.”

I call back lifelessly. All I can do is think of Sam’s eyes. Now when I picture his pale blue eyes I can see it.

I can see that night.

How could I not see it before? How could I have spent so much time being with him and getting to know him and not see it? We’d spent nearly every day together for well over a year and I had no idea. He had been so scared the night he found the severed ear of my father. He had held me through any of the loneliness I’d felt with Colby. And he’d been so kind to me whenever I needed it, but it was him. This entire thing happened because he was doing what mommy and daddy wanted him to do. He’d threatened my dad and used me as collateral for his family image. Used my dad as leverage for whenever I didn’t do as I was told. Suddenly I didn’t know if I could ever face Sam again. How could he have said he loved me earlier when he’d done all of this? All of this without telling me? Maybe we could’ve moved past this if he’d been honest with me from the beginning, before the maiming of my father. Before he’d got his hooks in me and befriended me. I can’t stop the tears from hitting me, even as Colby enters the room, his eyes finding me. Without saying a word he knows that I know everything that was said. He can tell that I’m utterly devastated and betrayed. The same look that he wears on his face mirrors mine. We’d both been played by Sam.

“Emilia-I-I’m so sorry-”

I cut him off by placing my hand in front of me, gesturing for him to stop. He sounds so broken when he speaks and the tears in his eyes are legitimate as he takes a step forward. Without saying anything I pull him in for a hug and bury my head in his chest. I hold onto him tightly as if hugging him could take away the pain of this newest discovery. He holds onto me too, his head on top of mine.

“... It’s okay baby. I’ve got you. I’ve got both of you.”

His nod to our unborn child makes my heart swell, my arms squeezing him firmly. We remain like this for several minutes before I dare to pull back and look at him. His blue eyes are filled with concern as we look at each other. He’s unsure of what to do or say.

Because he knew nothing he said could change what happened.

“I’m cooking dinner.”

I rasp when I can’t think of anything else to say. I didn’t even know how to unpack every single emotion washing over me. He gives me the smallest smile and places his hands on either side of my face, his thumbs brushing the stray tears away.

“How much of that did you hear?”

He asks.

“From when you started talking about a safe house for my father. I heard what Sam said. I heard all of it.”

A nod is all he gives me at first as he mulls over what to say next.

“He’s going to be staying with some friends for the time being. I told him we both need space to process everything.”

It’s my turn to nod and process. Suddenly I’m thankful that he’s being level headed for the both of us. We both felt betrayed and it was all so raw right now. Space would be the best thing for everyone involved. Even though a small part of me wanted to slap him for saying what he said and doing what he did.

“Now, what do you need from me?”

He asks, trying to do whatever he can to help me through this. I pondered the question for a moment before deciding on what I needed at this moment. Here, in his arms and with these feelings that felt like they were going to break me into a thousand pieces, I needed a distraction. I needed him to distract me and make me feel something else.

Anything else but this.

“I need you.”

The desperation in my voice gives my desires away immediately. For a second my husband looks down at me in confusion, only to replace the expression with a dark look of desire.

“How do you need me?”

He asks, his voice deeper as he leans down to press his lips to mine. He deepens the kiss instantly, his tongue in my mouth. I can feel that he needs this distraction too. That he’s hurting as much as I am and in need of reprieve. I feel his hands move to my waist as he lifts me up off of the floor to the counter top. He spreads my jean covered legs apart and stands between them as his hands find my hair. His lips never seem to leave mine, not even when he needs to take a breath.

“I need you to fuck me, so hard I never doubt that it’s you I belong to.”

Repeating his prior words towards me is enough to send him spinning. He pulls my body in against his, removing what little space had been between the both of us. The way his hands tangle in my hair and the gentle pull they give me is almost too much to bear. I can feel myself getting wetter the longer we remain like this.

“How long does that have to cook for?”

He asks, wanting to know how long we have before the oven interrupts us. I can’t help but giggle when he says this, amused by the question. An action that causes him to groan against my lips.

“20 minutes.”

Is all I reply as he lifts me off of the kitchen counter. He guides us to the kitchen table, staring down at me for a moment before his hands move to the button of my jeans. He undoes them and slowly drags them down my body, pulling them off with my pair of oxfords. My clothing gets tossed to the floor without any consideration, his hands moving to my underwear. A smirk finds his lips when he sees how wet I am.

“Fuck.”

He groans when he pulls the underwear down my legs, eyes fixated on my arousal. The care he’d put into tossing my clothing away is the same with my underwear, adding them to the pile. I can’t look away from him as he watches me. Quietly debating what he wants to do next. He turns his attention to the sweater I was still wearing. He gets on top of me on the table, his lips finding mine once more as he kisses me, I feel the ghost of his hands moving the sweater up my torso. He’s so gentle as he does this that it causes a chill to move up my spine. Goose bumps form on my arms as he pulls my sleaves off of me. He pauses his kisses long enough to lift the sweater over my head and off of my body. I hear the fabric fall to the floor, and I can’t help but whimper at the loss of his lips as he starts to kiss down my neck. His lips travel down my throat and to my chest, kissing up to the valley between my breasts.

Our eyes lock as he uses his teeth to unclasp the front of my strapless bra, removing the last peice of fabric on my body. Once the bra is gone he continues kissing down the valley of my breasts, stopping on ly when he decides to give my left nipple attention. He uses his mouth to suck the sensitive bud of my breast, his free hand carefully messaging the other breast. My body arches into him as he does this relentless assult on my breasts. I knew if this lasted too much longer I would cum.

He knew it too.

Which is why I am not surprised when he stills his actions and gets off of me. I look at him, my chest rising and falling as he moves his hands to his black button up.

“Can you touch yourself while I undress baby doll?”

He asks, his eyes on me as he waits for me to do as I’ve been told. Realizing he won’t undress himself until I’ve done as I’d been instructed. I slowly moved my hands down my torso, our eyes never leaving one another. My hands reach down to my slick sex. He unbuttons one button and waits until I’ve dipped my index finger into my wet folds before resuming. I can’t help but moan at the sensation of finger fucking myself. It was the same as when he did it, but I was so sensitive that even my fingers offered some relief.

But only some.

“Hmm, that’s my girl.”

He practically purrs as he finally completely undoes my shirt. The fabric finding its place in the pile on the floor.

“Add another finger baby.”

He speaks in a lower register. His hands on his jean button. My heart skip a beat as I add another finger, anothe rmoan escapes me. I slowly pump my fingers in and out of myself. The entire time I do this I can’t help but think about how much better this would feel if it was his fingers inside of me. My eyes flutter closed as I bring myself closer to the edge. His pants fall to the ground and I hear his shoes lightly thud to the floor.

“That’s enough baby. Daddy doesn’t want you to cum until I’ve had my chance to play with you.”

His hands still my actions and before I truly have to process it. His lips are on mine once more. His hands pulling my fingers away from where I need them the most. I whimper at the loss of them. The loss only lasts for a moment before I feel the tip of his hardened cock at the entrance of my soaked sex. I make make sure to open my eyes and stare directly at Colby as he slowly sinks his hardened length inside of me. His jaw clenches and his lips part as he pushes himself as far as he can inside of me. A small gasp of pleasure escapes me the moment he’s inside of me.

“Colby.”

I whisper his name, unable to say or think of anyone else. He chuckles, knowing all too well that he’s scrambled my mind before even moving inside of me. He pushes his lips back to mine as he guides his hands to either side of my lips. He lifts me up slightly and starts to move. His thrusts are careful as my elevated hips allow for him to hit deeper inside of me.

With every thrust I feel like I could cum without warning. Every movement felt euphoric. After a while I can feel myself moving to meet his thrusts. My body in desperate need of a resolution to my climax. Careful groans pass his lips as he soaks me in, savoring each second he’s inside of me.

“Does my sweet little wife need to cum?”

He mumbles against my lips in between kisses. I hum in response when I can’t think of actual words to say. Which earns a hum from him in response. He quickens his pace. With each thrust he’s sloppier and sloppier as our bodies both reach our highs aand we come undone.

We cum together. Both of us falling into a heap of breathlessness.

Neither of us speaks as we collect ourselves. Both of our bodies tired from the range of emotions we’d felt today. He smiles down at me sweetly, his eyes flicking over to the stove before returning back to me.

“How about we eat what you cooked, have some sparkingling grape juice, since someone is preventing you from drinking, and watch a show?”

He lightly places his hand on my stomach when he mentions our unborn child as the reason for drinking grape juice. He stares down at my stomach in wonder. I don’t think it had hit him that we were expecting. It still didn’t feel real to me either. Something that I knew would change as my body changed. Without speaking he places his lips on my stomach, giving me a soft kiss.

“I love you little one. I promise to be a better parent than what I had.”

He looks up at me and smiles once more. He looks so genuinely happy and it’s enough to make my eyes fill with tears. Was Sam right? Should we be thanking him for bringing us together? Where would we be if he never did what he did? Its an unbearable thought.

I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

But even still, I couldn’t just forgive him. Colby might’ve been an ass at times, but he was always up front with me about who he was. He never tried to hide it.

Even when I wished he would’ve.

Sam’s betrayal stung because he’d hidden this from me. Even when I overheard him speaking to Colby he didn’t sound like the Sam I’d gotten to know. I look at Colby, blinking back the tears as he helps me up off of the table, his hands careful and cautious.

“I would really like that Colby.”

I whisper as I think of how much we both needed a night of normalcy. After everything that happened today, we deserved a nice relaxing night in. But I couldn’t shake the fear of what tomorrow could bring.

The fear of a new day and whatever Hell could come with it.

#colby brock #colby brock fanfic #colby brock smut #sam and colby #sam and colby smut #sam and colby fanfiction #colby brock imagine #colby x reader

62 notes · View notes

starastrologyy · 2 years ago

Text

Astrology Observations

Please do not plagiarize anything that I write or repost on any other social media platform 🤍

It’s so interesting because I know three couples who have Mars conjunct their composite Ascendant/ Mars in the composite 1st house. Their conflicts are often very public; as in people know when they are fighting or when they are not speaking. I thought this was interesting and very fitting. I will say that these couples have Aries or Scorpio on the composite ascendant which probably amplifies the drama(conflict). Thus, things may manifest differently in relationships that have ‘non-confrontational’ signs such as Pisces/Virgo/Capricorn on the ascendant.

Solar return years where your Solar Return Ascendant or Midheaven is in the same sign as your natal Midheaven or Ascendant, will likely be very pivotal years for you. With the Solar return Midheaven being in the same sign as your natal Midheaven, something major is likely to occur in your life in relation to your career or worldly status. By a change in ‘worldly status’ , I mean you may become a wife/husband, a mother/father, a doctor, a business owner, etc… something about your title is likely to change! You may even leave a job and start your own business, become unemployed, graduate college and so on! Major transitions and life changes are often indicated by a solar return ascendant or Midheaven being in the same sign as the natal ascendant or Midheaven.

People who have Uranus square Chiron in their birth charts often feel very isolated in the world. One of their major wounds often stems from the fact that they are different from most people, and thus they frequently feel like outsiders, or feel as if other people perceive them as being “weird”. This placement can make it difficult for a person to gain a real sense of community or belonging!

Jupiter transiting your 3rd house is very auspicious if you’re looking to get your drivers license! This can also be a very fruitful time, If you have some kind of online business/blog.

When someone’s Mars falls into your 8th house, you may feel a strong attraction to them, even if they are not your usual type. I’ve had clients who share this synastry with someone tell me that the Mars person was not their initial type, but after they were intimate their attraction towards mars skyrocketed!

If you have the ruler of your Ascendant or your IC (4th house cusp) placed in the 9th house, you will likely travel a lot or relocate throughout your life!

People with Taurus on the IC make good interior designers! These people often have a keen eye for decorating! Alternatively, I’ve also seen this placement manifesting as people thinking you come from an affluent/wealthy family even if you don’t!

A friend of mine fell pregnant when she had both her moon & mars in her solar return 5th house. What’s interesting is the north node was also transiting her natal 5th house that year!

Kylie Jenner is a perfect example of the positive way in which having a Scorpio moon can manifest; in relation to the Mother! People always say Scorpio moons tend to have “mommy issues” which can be true, but on the other end they can be exceptionally close with their mothers like Kylie and Kris! However, Kris Jenner is a Scorpio sun which may explain her bond with Kylie as they have a “sun moon conjunction” in their synastry. (She has admitted that Kylie is her favorite child) nevertheless, I’m essentially saying that having a Scorpio moon does not mean you’re automatically tied to the mommy wound narrative. It can actually be the exact opposite since Scorpio is the planet of extremes.

If you have Lilith in the 4th house, specifically if it’s conjunct your IC, you may have grown up feeling like the “black sheep” of your family.

One thing that I think a lot of people forget is the fact that there’s a duality that exists within most placements. For example, whilst Neptune in the 7th can suggest you attract partners who need saving, or perhaps you find yourself in relationships with people who have been victimized by life in some way, it is also possible that some of your partners perceive YOU to be this way. It’s not always cut and dry! Sometimes our placements (especially the ones in our relationship houses) can tell us how other people perceive us! Thus, most placements go both ways!

Click the link in my bio if you are interested in purchasing a chart reading!🤍

793 notes · View notes

delta-gambit-au · 7 months ago

Text

FAQ about Delta-Gambit

As I mentioned before, I think this post should clarify a lot of questions behind my project. If anything is missing, be kind to tell me so and I'll edit.

((05/OCT/2024 -- I'm going to unpin this temporally until I finish tidying up this post -- had a huge set-back IRL that will dent my ability to focus on the project)) ((15/SEP/2024 -- Still trying to catch up on pending stuff for my blog, now that I'm getting more confident with Ibis Paint on the phone and combining it with CSP, I'll be able to focus on doing some organizing on this blog soonish. After that I'll focus on the stuff I owe to other people 😳 (not 3D because I still can't buy a GPU replacement for my broken one, but at least I can draw picturs... if RL stops nagging me with their selfish requests) ((18/AUG/2024 -- I gotta do some cleanup in this post later down the month now that I'm learning how to handle better the blog's presentation by watching how other people do theirs. Please disregard the present mess until then.))

((05/AUG/2024 -- I think I should add some disclaimer here -- currently I'm working on the project very slowly due to several RL issues that doesn't give me enough spare time a day -- until I get a new tablet (now a new GPU) to work faster I'll keep posting sketches and other things that I can do on the phone and 3D renders of my AU and OCs of other people -- I apologize for the slow trickling of content on my blog and thank you for dropping by))

🔵 What is this AU about?

This AU branches out after a half-baked Pacifist Route in which the plea of Spamton has been ignored by Kris for too long. Everything else is as a normal Pacifist Route, but with a tasteful twist. The story revolves around Spamton mostly, but he isn't the sole protagonist of this story, as other characters come to prominence later on and get tangled in a deep conspiracy that puts all of their lives at stake. It's roughly a story about the lives of the Darkners in a Dark World more than character centric drama, but I get to weave a ton of narrative devices that so far is being loved by all my proof-readers.

🔵 Is this AU related to any other AU?

Nope. This AU was created without any knowledge about anybody else's AU in the past. In fact, I didn't know other people made theirs until I read about it and that's when I came to the realization that what I did was called as "AU" 👀 I started writing the prologue draft at the end of January 2024, but I did not make any contact with the fandom up until the end of March 2024.

🔵 Why you make so many experimental art not related to the visual novel?

Because that's my way of training art, and I'd rather pick my characters as theme and focus of my training than practicing with something else to be honest. I also need to practice drawing my characters more often so that I can stay consistent with the designs when I start to build up the visual novel in Unreal Engine 5.

🔵 Do you have any samples of the visual novel?

Currently nope, as I'm still in training, learning through an Udemy course a friend of mine gifted me to learn how to make visual novels in Unreal Engine 5. Until I get the script of the first season done, I'll not work on the visual novel, because it would be dumb to work on it and not have any complete chapters done to start sharing them.

🔵 Will the visual novel be free to play or?

The visual novel will be free to download, but of course, you can always give a tip of kromer if you think my work is worthy of it 😁

It will be published on Locals, Itch.io and on Steam (this last one further down the line because of how it must be setup and the $100 that costs to get a game slot on Steam).

I'd also upload gameplay of it on my YouTube and Rumble channels if you are more of watching others playing it than playing the game yourself.

🔵 You mentioned a "season". Is your visual novel split in seasons?

I thought about calling them "arcs" but then I settled with the word "seasons" because of how animated they are and visual-novel format is almost like watching a movie but with huge captions. I've enough material for 1 season (of roughly 12~15 chapters, depending if I need to split chapters more because of their length) and I have ideas for a Season 2 that can survive on its own up until Chapter 3, 4 and 5 of the original Deltarune comes. Then after we get more official Deltarune story, I'll be able to produce a third season.

(moved updates to a different post)

🔵 Why Spamton though?

idk, brainrot? My Spamton should be called DG!Spamton, to distinguish it from the original (or other Spamton in the fandom). Though both are similar (if not identical) mine has something that made a few Spamton haters to start to like Spamton. I don't know how to explain it… It just works ._.

🔵 How do you pronounce "Spwatchton"?

S-pwatch-ton

🔵 Are you a Spaniard?

Born and raised, and it shows in my odd way of writing. Hope you don't mind some typos here and there but I try my utmost to quash them when I see them 😅

Also and just in case, you may address me as he/him or they/them but since I'm NB you may use whatever pronouns you feel comfortable with 😉I love you all 💌 (in the most respectful way)

You may call me Spwatchton or Spwatch, we're not picky.

#[DG!FAQ]#removed some superfluous content on August 2024 #I discovered the “Read More” thingy!#I should do more clean-up here...

12 notes · View notes

retropobor · 8 months ago

Text

Ladies, Gentleman, and All Other Colors, I present to thee: Deltarune Parallels

So about a week ago, I put out a poll asking when I should reveal this little project of mine, and with an overwhelming 2 votes the people said I should release now, so I am pleased to announce the existence of the one and only

(It's currently in a very early stage, so not everything is fleshed out, but here's what I have so far)

Parallels is a little side project of mine which takes the current deltarune world, and focuses on a different cast.

The Human: Terro

Terro is an adventurous person. They're often very quiet while in public, but completely change when alone or with friends, becoming drastically more social and friendly.

The Monster: Ruby

Ruby is a jack of all trades when it comes to knowledge. If you have a question about just about anything, she probably at least knows where to guide you for answers. Above all else however, she loves gardening and nature

The Neighbor: Jack

Jack is a simple monster. If someone gets scared, himself included, he's happy. Scaring runs in his family, and he's happy to keep up the tradition. Although being Hallow entails far more than just scaring. After all, a halloween scare contrasts sharply with holiday spirit

The Prince from the pmdw: MT Pqge

Mgfaymfaz Tqxbqd Pqge, mxea wzaiz me MT Pqge ad vgef Pqge, ue m pmdwzqd ymotuzq yqmzf fa meeuef xustfzqde ftdagst ftq pmdw iadxp. Tq ue puefuzofxk xqee radymx ftmz tue oagzfqdbmdf, ngf efuxx nqxuqhqe uz yqdok mxx ftq emyq.

The story would occur during the story of regular Deltarune in hometown, however, instead of playing as kris, you instead play as Terro, accompanied by Ruby on your search to find out what happened to Kris and Susie

Now then, with all those introductions aside, you're probably wondering where this will go. That is a good question, I do not know, but I have some options, which is where you come in. Either:

A Game

Pros

-The intended experience for parallels

-Will probably be the most enjoyable

-Gives me an excuse to finally get into game design and begin something big

Cons

-Will take forever (Look no further than UTY taking 7 years)

-Requires me to learn music design, and game design

-Unless someone actively asks to join, I have no clue how I would expand my team

A webcomic

Pros

-Frequent Content that still follows the plot

-Follows the plot most accurately without being the game itself

Cons

-I cannot draw well and I don't have any art creation software other than aseprite (There is a reason I went into sprite art)

-I'm not sure how I would write this, and I don't think it will turn out that good

You can submit asks, and the characters will answer

Pros

-Can exist alongside other options freely (honestly depending on what happens with my question box, it will probably just come with whatever other option is chosen)

-Takes basically no effort on my end

Cons

-Barely gives any plot

-If used alone, makes certain characters forever unknown

Or I release the info doc I have on this thing

Pros

-Easiest option on my end

Cons

-I genuinely cannot think of a more boring option for all this lore to be revealed. Like seriously, this doc just lists everything out that I have

-Locks out all other options from being usable as it spoils the entire plot and everyone's character -Immediately all mystery is thrown out the window, and the majority of headcanon formation is squashed

Multiple of the above

Pros

-Any Pros of the components

-Gives more depth and interest to the story

Cons

-Any Cons of the components

-Combines the time of the individual parts

I now place the option in your hands, but I should note that if this doesn't get much attention, I'll probably just drop this all, because I already have a lot on my plate (Idk if this is greedy of me to ask, and I guarantee this will never happen in a million years, but just so everyone can have a concrete number I'll guarantee making whatever comes of the result I can get 3k notes on this post if the poll is still active, 5k notes if it's not, at which point I'll repost the poll so all the new people can vote).

Anyways, I think that's about everything on the topic, thanks for reading through this mess, you may go back to your regular scrolling.

oh hey you're still here. Have some art

Okay, that's all for real

U eqq kag mdq dmftqd pqhafqp fa gzpqdefmzpuzs ftue fqjf. Kag dqyuzp yq m xaf ar ykeqxr, pqmd dqmpqd. Bxqmeq, oazfuzgq fa pa ea itqz iq yqqf msmuz. Kag iuxx ruzp sdqmf geq uz pauzs ea.

#art #my art #pixel art #my ocs #oc #deltarune #utdr #digital art #artwork #deltarune parallels

9 notes · View notes

puppyluver256 · 2 years ago

Text

[Image Description: NiGHTS from NiGHTS into Dreams looking angrily at an unseen individual. NiGHTS is a humanoid entity resembling a jester with light skin, large blue eyes, and two purple horns that resemble a jester's hat. They are wearing a white shirt with yellow and purple sleeve cuffs, a pink and red vest with yellow accents, an orange neck ruff, and purple pants. On their chest is a large red jewel. To their right are Kris and Frisk, from Deltarune and Undertale respectively. They are a teenager and child, both with light brown skin and brown hair. Both are wearing striped tops, Kris' being a green and yellow hoodie, Frisk's being a blue and purple shirt. In NiGHTS' hand is The Knight from Hollow Knight. They are a small bug with a white horned head, wearing a grey cloak and holding a nail. Behind NiGHTS, Tim Tam from Smile For Me is peeking up from the bottom of the frame. They are a child with purple skin, dark blue hair in a ponytail with a yellow ponytail holder, and large dark blue eyes. Text in a speech bubble, spoken by NiGHTS, reads "Look, if someone says they're not a boy or a girl, you don't get to pick an option for them. Most nonbinary people and characters aren't like me." End ID.]

-----

Y'know that one little annoying tendency of certain individuals to see a character that canonically uses they or it as their pronouns, they go "oh, so this means I get to decide what their gender is!", and then they slap either he or she on there like it's their right to decide for them/their creators? Yeeaaaah no, there's One major iconic character I know of who that actually applies to and would be more widely known: NiGHTS. Their gender is canonically up to interpretation, they'll take he/she/they/it/whatever else no problem. But everyone else in this image? They/them only or they/it canonically. And apparently NiGHTS here isn't too happy with people using them as an excuse to misgender anyone who's not strictly a boy or a girl (:

I mostly just included the first few characters that came to mind who usually get this treatment and who I know for certain are canonically neither boys/men or girls/women. Frisk and Kris (and also Chara) get this a lot, one particular instance of this leading to a friend of mine having to abandon a Deltarune fic because of people who are too stubborn to acknowledge them as separate entities from the player, as well as being ridiculously sensitive to obviously facetious "threats". But that's more said friend's story to tell, tbh. Ghost, as well as the other vessels including Broken Vessel and the titular Hollow Knight, are specifically mentioned to not have gender and regularly referred to as "they" or "it"--hell, when their sister Hornet is specifically labeled "the gendered child", it's obviously something that Means Something. As for Tim Tam, I know that Smile For Me is a smaller fandom compared to the other three indie darlings here--smaller than NiGHTS as well, but I'd imagine that's a given--but I've seen them get she'd a few times and I just shrivel up inside.

I had some other ideas for inclusion, but Flower Kid doesn't have a concrete design and was specifically meant to be the player self-insert, similar with the player character of the most recent Animal Crossing and Splatoon entries where gender selection has been replaced with "style". I also considered Shiver, but 1) I don't know for certain whether or not they were intended to be nonbinary according to the original Japanese and my search for sources only give me Nate's insistence they're a woman (which I don't entirely trust given his track record with localizing canonical queer characters in previous Nintendo games), and 2) I didn't want a flood of rabid squid kids taking Nate's word as law.

💖🐶 Check out my pinned post for ways to support my artwork, among other things! 🐶💖

~Likes are appreciated, but reblogs are greatly preferred as they let more people see my content! If you have something to say, feel free to give feedback in tags/comments/replies as well!~

NiGHTS and other NiGHTS into Dreams concepts © SEGA/SonicTeam Frisk, Kris, and other Undertale and Deltarune concepts © Toby Fox The Knight (aka Ghost) and other Hollow Knight concepts © Team Cherry Tim Tam and other Smile For Me concepts © LimboLane Artwork © PuppyLuver Studios

#NiGHTS into dreams #undertale #deltarune #hollow knight #smile for me #smile for me game #frisk dreemurr #kris dreemurr #the knight (hollow knight)#ghost (hollow knight)#tim tam (smile for me)#nonbinary #jess drew the thing #sfw #image description #insects tw #just in case

23 notes · View notes

doors-kennith-au · 1 year ago

Text

Doors Kennith AU Masterpost

Ignore this. this shit is old

Please read this!

This also includes info and boundaries for me

Info abt me

I am a minor

I am Australian

Pronouns are he/they/it

Some designs contain blood, and cannibalism as well as gore mentions and maybe some drawings of gore are going to appear on this blog. I'll try and keep it mild but be warned!

Names: Jack/Void/Novo/Light

Please keep everything to M/MA! I will not answer things if they l have heavy sexual references, please dont be weird. Every entity is open for asks!

All entites use It/It's. Both Lights use He/Him.

Please keep in mine that the following entities are MINORS! Do NOT be weird with asks about them!!! If you do be weird, you're blog will be blocked. Please don't make me turn off anon asks.

Screech

Sally/window

Rush

Ambush

And Curious Light (not an entity)

Some topics that may trigger people may be referenced, however I will try my best to keep them to a minimum! I will always add a warning for things that I think will trigger people, disgust people, etc.

Relationships:

Rush and Ambush are cousins

Hide and Seek are siblings

Curious and Guide and brothers

Everyone is a parental or sibling figure to Sally and Screech, Sally and Screech don't know each other well, they're not exactly friends but they acknowledge each other.

Jack and Hide are open to be shipped, romantically or platonically

The A's are open to be shipped, romantically or platonically

Seek and Figure are open to be shipped, however they are just friends and that will most likely not change

Jeff is the most father-like to Sally

Everyone else not mentioned is open to be shipped, however the rest are most likely just friends or they acknowledge each other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Both of my mods no longer have tumblr due to their own reasons. Kris, my second mod, sometimes makes fanart, and he likes to post it. The fanart he makes will be posted with permission from him.

#doorscloverau #doorscloveraucomic #artists on tumblr #masterlist #masterpost

3 notes · View notes

petra-creat0r · 2 years ago

Text

I posted 599 times in 2022

That's 198 more posts than 2021!

286 posts created (48%)

313 posts reblogged (52%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@miamouse-va

@atdffpetra

@catboymoments

@lemonbellflower

@askthedreemurr-fontfamily

I tagged 150 of my posts in 2022

#fan kid - 110 posts

#undertale fan kid - 90 posts

#fanchild - 90 posts

#fan child - 89 posts

#undertale fankid - 69 posts

#undertale fan child - 68 posts

#undertale fanchild - 61 posts

#ish fan kid - 59 posts

#undertale-ish - 54 posts

#ut fan kid - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 101 characters

#i can handle not being able to afford lunch on my own but not being too broke for the cool dide shirt

My Top Posts in 2022:

Alador Blight x Darius Deamonne?

Okay I really like how she turned out. She's mine. I'm keeping her.

89 notes - Posted July 24, 2022

A fankid of Edric and Hunter?

I have no other info on them other than, gender is up to interpretation and they like bird.

No, I don't know if that budgie is a palisman or not. It also doesn't have a name. Also again, thinking of making these into adopts. Is, anyone, interested?

95 notes - Posted July 11, 2022

DAH PAPYTON!!! my babies.

Broadway the Skeleton

Full name: Broadway Felicity Blook

B-Day: November 27th, 2020

Age: 11 (In 2031)

Glee/Glam She/Her They/Them

-Wants to be a famous idol like glare Dadaton. Idolizes him and Marilyn Monroe

-Loves to put on fashion shows with glare siblings. When glee's older, ends up becoming a fashion designer.

-Ghost magic (can phase through stuff) + Mettaton EX attacks.

-Owns at least 15 feather boas and has a pet boa constrictor named Noodle.

Rexi the Robo-Goat

Full name: Reximus Xavier Blook

B-Day: June 4th, 2021

Age: 11 (In 2031)

He/They

-Was adopted by Papyrus and Mettaton when he was 5. After Broadway met them after the couple bring him home, Broadway offered Rexi to be in glare latest fashion show. The two have been inseparable since.

-His arms are prosthetics made by Alphys. Underneath, they're missing their left fore arm and have a deformed right.

-Has plant magic. Kins Isabella from Encanto

-Will find someone's insecurities to rip them apart, however does this to hide his own insecurities.

Chicago the Puppet

Full name: Chicago Ghost/Garamond Blook

B-Day: September 7th, 2022

Age: 9 (In 2031)

He/Him

-Found Spamton packed away with Kris's old stuff in the garage one day. They've pretty much been inseparable since.

-Is trying to be a media influencer with his friends, however he is really terrible at it. He's much better at inventing, which he's also more passionate about.

-Magic Puppet strings

-Has a crush on Taffita "Taffy" Cottonheart, one of the kids in his friend group. A charming and somewhat flirtatious pink rabbit.

See the full post

106 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

Is Deltarune allowed? If so then SUSELLE SUSELLE SUSELLE SU

SUSELLE!!!!!

Babies! Also these are redesigns of the ones I've already made.

Donny the Kirin

Full name: Donner Wolf Holiday

B-Day: October 31st, 2031

Age: 10 (In 2041)

He/Him

-Likes to hide under beds and scare people.

-Loves making holiday decorations with cardboard.

-Ice magic. Horns glow and get magicy when he casts magic.

-Acts like a punk. Really just wants cuddles.

Cupid the Dino

Full name: Cupid Eve Holiday

B-Day: February 13th, 2033

Age: 8 (In 2041)

She/Her

-Has a itty bitty tail she hides under her dress

-Can perfectly mimic the "Wide Susie" pose.

-Giant. Axe.

-Looks cute and innocent but is ready to snap.

128 notes - Posted April 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

@xxtc-96xx finally got me to draw babytwos guys. To be fair, when I found out Newts new twins are also named Lilac and Lavender, I had to draw them with my trainersonas.

the Bluegum twins would be very excited to meet some babytwos.

516 notes - Posted October 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

5 notes · View notes

hncproject · 6 days ago

Text

ᚐ҉ᚐ✦⸻What represents me?

Research is done, but that is not enough to start making initial designs. The brief states I must make a brand to represent my identity, so what actually represents me? ✦ I believe other people observe you better than you could ever do so yourself. Opinion of oneself is always biased in my eyes, due to insecurities, ego or narcissism. The energy you give out always seems more important than your inner thoughts. Because of this I will also ask those closest to me to describe me. In this post I will combine my opinions and my friend's.

✧⸻ Colours ⸻✧

✦ The colour associated with me has always been green. Green is a calm and nurturing colour. My friends would say I'm green because of my down-to-earth and relaxed demeanour.

I think the zodiac is also interesting to mention here. I was born in the month of May, making me a Taurus. Taurus is a constellation associated with the earth element. When thinking of earth, the first colours you think of are green and brown, right? Interestingly, the gemstone associated with May is an emerald. Emeralds are also green... I think it only makes sense that my aura would be a green colour too.

✦ Although the colour associated with me is green, most people would be able to guess my favourite colour is actually blue. I think it's very beautiful, and I know I won't miss the opportunity to use blue for my brand.

✧⸻ Characters ⸻✧

✦ If you're familiar with Myers–Briggs Type Indicator ( MBTI ) mine is INTP.

✧ MBTI is a pseudoscientific way to describe an individuals personality. I don't take pseudoscience for a fact, but I think they're still fun and interesting to consider, thus making me interested in astrology such as the Zodiac and personality typing methods.

✧ INTP stands for Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Perceiving. INTPs prefer to work alone, are creative, analytical and enjoy taking challenges head on.

✦ The characters I showed are L Lawliet, Kris Dreemurr and Albedo "Kreideprinz" , which are all also typed as INTP. Since we all have the same personality type, there are several similarities between us.

✦⸻ L Lawliet from Death Note

✧ L is the worlds greatest detective that is known to solve even the most daunting, cold cases. He lives in absolute secrecy, working alone, never showing his face, name or sharing his whereabouts. He is a mystery to everyone. He is forced to go against these rules and show himself to the public following an extremely difficult case.

⋆ Although he is exceptionally intelligent, he has very strange quirks. These quirks make him stand out, disturbing others and making them doubt his competence. L also doesn't accept working on any cases he is not interested in, making him seem pretentious. Even so, he is himself unapologetically. One of his "rituals" is sitting with his knees tucked to his chest at all times.

He says this posture helps him think and increase his deduction skills.

⋆ Everything I mentioned about L so far is something I can relate to. I keep secrets, work best on my own and have my own quirks. In order to work to the best of my abilities I need to play music on a high enough volume. I also fidget when working; swaying and rocking or pinching/biting my lips similarly to L when in deep thought. This constant movement helps me focus and keeps me interested in the task at hand, if I'm not already interested. I do it even if it's seen as weird or rude. L also doesn't hesitate to share his observations, even if they may offend others or make him sound condescending. I am honest with my feelings in a similar way, not hesitating to act uninterested if that's how I'm feeling.

✦⸻ Kris Dreemurr from Deltarune

✦ Kris is the protagonist of "Deltarune". Because he is the player, his personality is only shown through interactions with others and the environment. Kris is described as an introvert and said to be creepy. He is seen as creepy because he doesn't talk and has an intimidating expression, as well as his dark and mischievous pranks. During my studies, I heard those things being said about me too. My reputation has been tainted like this following a horror movie project. It's horror. It's going to be creepy. However, the prankster quality makes him seem silly, even if it's in a dark way. I think I can be silly too; I think it's funny to be out of pocket.

⋆ Although Kris doesn't talk much, when he does his words are very blunt, straight to the point. That is something I appreciate and wish it's a quality I had too. I trip over my words often due to anxiety

✦⸻ Albedo from Genshin Impact

✦ Albedo is a chief alchemist from the game "Genshin Impact". Albedo is an artificial being made of chalk that has a deep interest about finding more about the world around him. The way he talks sounds very monotone, however under his indifferent exterior there is a benevolent and curious creature. Similar to L, he spends more time alone, in a cold and snowy region. If it was up to me, I would always spend my time in a wintery environment too. Albedo only goes to the city when it is necessary to meet with the other alchemists. Even if he is so withdrawn, he actually does not avoid making friends. He enjoys company and is interested in the way people interact with each-other. Unfortunately he finds relationships stressful and tiresome due to the effort needed to maintain them.

⋆ Nobody knows much about his personal life because he keeps most of it a secret. However, upon meeting the protagonist, a traveller from another world, he did not hesitate to share more of his personal interests and life. He felt a sort of kinship to the player since they're foreign to the world

⋆ I think Albedo is very relatable in those senses. I do not seek friendship because maintaining relationships is so frustrating, but I am always open to talk and help with others. I am extremely neutral with everyone and I would not do anything to intentionally hurt anyone, I'd rather help than hurt. I also keep my interests to myself, but if I ever meet anyone as "weird" as me, I would probably open up.

✧⸻ Animals ⸻✧

✦ Everyone has a spirit animal, so to speak. Mine would be an owl, but just one animal isn't enough to describe me. I will explain why in the following paragraphs

✧ Owls as a spirit animal, hint to someone mysterious, wise and intuitive. They're also associated with foresight, an ability I believe I have to some degree. Though, I'm not calling myself magical. I believe this "foresight" is just my intuition and empathy acting together, allowing me to guess how someone might feel or what they are doing a the moment, without having been told beforehand. Wise is the last thing I believe I am, but I do think I'm mysterious. I'm often told I don't talk enough about my feelings or that I move too quietly and end up scaring those I walk up to. These aren't intentional traits, it just simply happens. I think moving quietly is actually an attractive trait, but I don't think of myself as closed off and I'm confused every time I am told I am. I think that's because I talk a lot in my head and don't realise I never did so outwardly. Oopsies

✧ Zebras and hamsters aren't spirit animals, but I think they describe me well. A zebra is absolutely gorgeous but they are very rough and aggressive! Owls and hamsters don't compare to this temperament, and I think that can represent my mood swings. My emotional state is actually not very stable, I often get angry. When I do, I might lash out even at those who don't deserve it. I am not proud of it, and try to be quiet until I feel better. I prefer being quiet when I'm angry... I actually prefer being quiet all the time. A hamster doesn't make much noise. Hamsters are docile, cute, and stare confused at everything. I think that's pretty characteristic for me when I am in a good mood. They just have a sort of silly admiration or look of love in their eyes. I think I'm full of love and hopeful when I'm not thinking about how awful the world is

0 notes

lazilyhereandhazilyclear · 5 months ago

Text

@thesadboisguidetolife tagged me to post my lockscreen, last song, last movie, and last photo (besides my lockscreen, i would imagine), so away we go

lockscreen:

this was made by Rob Sheridan, a graphic designer and glitch artist best known for his work for Nine Inch Nails.

last song:

youtube

two days after the release of Telefon Tel Aviv's album Immolate Yourself (one of my favorite albums), band member Charles Cooper died of an accidental overdose, leaving the future of the band uncertain. in the next eight years, the remaining band member Joshua Eustis was a touring member of Nine Inch Nails and worked a lot with Maynard James Keenan's project Puscifer, among other projects. this song is the first song where Eustis was able to return to Telefon Tel Aviv, and the transformative influence of the work he did in those intervening years is obvious to those familiar with earlier Telefon Tel Aviv. he has since released a really great album Dreams Are Not Enough (another favorite of mine). (and right now i'm listening to Around The Fur by Deftones.)

last movie:

youtube

seriously weird. i finished it thinking "what the fuck?" and ultimately, i really liked it. definitely not for everyone though . . .

last photo (besides my lockscreen):

sometimes i like to cook, and this bowl of soup i made (khao soi nam naa or khao soi lao) is a rabbit hole to explain. down we go

i only ever take pictures of the food i make, not food in restaurants - maybe if i went to one of those avant garde restaurants i might start - but anyway, a friend asked me what i was making, and i sent them this. i'm reeeaaalllyyy into Thai food, and this is probably the most complicated thing i ever make from scratch (i didn't make the noodles); it's a project with a lot of steps (done over several weeks) and because it's one of my favorite soups, i make large batches of some of its components to make it easier to assemble. this is variously called Khao Soi Nam Naa and Khao Soi Lao. (i found recipes for it, and all the data i'm about to spew, in cookbooks by Kris Yenbamroong, Andy Ricker, and James Syhabout.) in northern Thailand (and in the usa), Khao Soi usually refers to a northern Thai coconut curry noodle soup that's kinda getting well known in the usa, and you can sometimes find it in restaurants stateside, and definitely in restaurants that specialize in northern Thai food. this is not that. in Thailand this is "The Other Khao Soi". it's harder to find in northern Thailand, somewhat easier the closer you get to the borders of either Myanmar or Laos. it's a pork ragù noodle soup (no coconut milk included). the steps involved in making it begin with making a pork broth (the pork i used was subsequently repurposed to make sorta a green chili with some of the broth and a salsa verde i made). then i infused the broth with various southeast Asian aromatics (shallots, white pepper, lemongrass, ginger, cilantro, etc). then i made the ragù: called Nam Phrik Ong, which in Laos and Isaan province (northeastern Thailand) is a pork tomato dip served with vegetables, pork rinds and sticky rice. then the assembly, which is cook the noodles, and then garnish. here the garnishes are (left to right) beansprouts, cilantro, and fermented mustard greens. pickled mustard greens in China, and in packages you can buy, are pickled in vinegar, but in Laos, Thailand, Malaysia, and Myanmar (probably others), they are fermented. so, yes, i fermented the gai choy (Chinese mustard greens). it's one of my favorite pickled vegetables; it has both a wasabi-like burn from the mustard greens themselves, as well as some mild burn from the garlic and chilies i throw into the brine. so, because this is a favorite but also a project (multiple projects), i make the ragù and the pork broth and the mustard greens in large quantities so that all that i need to do is defrost the broth and the ragù and assemble it.

that was a lot.

ok, so, tagging people, i'm gonna ditto @stormesandshowersparttwo and @campcrow2 (i'll dig around to see if you already did this) as well as @adventures-in-mimesis, @angrypsychologist @shys-critter-cage @loyalist-vladdie @thenameren @hes-a-gayy but seriously no pressure (i always feel weird asking people anything remotely personal)

#me #Youtube

1 note · View note

themadxd127 · 9 months ago

Note

Their closeness doesn't matter because they are video game characters and will conform to whatever the game design needs them to. They don't matter because they are fictitious, and the game never calls attention to it, not even once. Not every single piece of game design needs an in-universe explanation, and Toby still has to this day avoids the questions of these humans' gender. "They" can just be a stand-in for ambiguous gender

This is not even mentioning the fact that Chara wasn't even in the underground for that long and is just refer to by the dreemurr family as a person they knew long ago, or the fact that Toriel had to borrow a library book to figure out how to even take care of Kris. Plus, even if there was an in-universe explanation for it. It still wouldn't matter cause people use "they/them" on people they know all the time, even when they know their gender identity isn't nb, so it could just be the default for monsters.

Also, I don't believe that any of them are their own person separate from us. They can still be stand-ins for us while still being a character in the universe, with backstories and friends. They don't have to literally be us for that to work. This is a common practice in many rpgs. It's a sliding scale of how much of these characters' attributes is up to the player to choose, and it's just that you can't choose certain aspects of these humans. This is exemplified in the fact that Chara has an interchangeable name and the fact that Kris and Frisk have racial ambiguous yellow skin, obscured eyes, and blank facial expressions. And I highly doubt Toby meant for Kris and Frisk to have jaundice or something.

Also, I think you misunderstood the mirror aspect. It is not a contradiction, Undertale is a *thematic* mirror to us, not literally in the universe' reality because we don't exist as a player in the literal reality of undertale. Take that Flowey scene after you've beaten pacifists. Thematicly, it represents the game trying to convince you, the actual player, to leave the game alone, but in the universe's actual reality, it's Flowey pleading towards Chara not to true reset the timeline (this even draws a further connection between us and Chara).

Basically, I did all of this to say that Toby intentionally designed his games and stories for us to draw our own personal conclusions and that all views are valid, and all I wish for is that people will respect mine without personally attacking me for it and to recognize that it's their personal interpretation not undeniably fact. I just prefer calling Kris a guy cause it's easier for me.

Hi, I've read your post regarding the interpretive gender of Kris, Frisk, and Chara, and I really love those posts. It helps remind me I'm not alone in think ling their genderis up to interpretation. But after seeing some recent reblogs. I was kinda worried that you don't believe that anymore, and I'm here to ask if you still do.

Well, after I reviewed all the evidence, I came to the conclusion that Kris and Chara are canonically they/them, while Frisk's pronouns are unknown. However, it is a nice and fitting headcanon that they too are they/them, imo.

It also is debatable whether, at the very end of the game, the others are already familiar enough with Frisk that they're no longer using they/them as a polite generic pronoun and rather as Frisk's personal pronoun. (And since Frisk never told Asriel their pronouns, only their name, I don't necessarily consider this to be the case yet.)

That said...

Depending on where in the timeline this line fits and how close of a friend Flowey is to Frisk at this point, it could be considered a confirmation.

#undertale #deltarune #utdr #reblog #the kfc #the great pronoun debate #kris is ambiguous #chara is ambiguous #frisk is ambiguous

4 notes · View notes

itstheoneshot · 4 years ago

Text

Kai’s Masterlist

I’ll keep this updated as I post anything new, I hope this makes viewing my blog a little easier for you all! Please be patient, my life is crazy hectic! I will still try to write as much as I can, just some days I might not get the chance to!

Here’s a link to my post on how to format your request, send them in via ask!

My DMs are always open for chats, and you can find me on my main here too!

SHINee

- Onew

Best Friends Forever

365 Days

Night Off

PHD

Jincenzo

- Jonghyun

White T-Shirt - A Series (in progress)

Merry Christmas

Different

- Key

Booty Call

Reflection

Designer Boy

- Minho

First Time

In Charge

Imperfect

VIP

Lovesick

- Taemin

Criminal

Seven Minutes In Heaven

Strings

EXO

- Reactions/Imagines: All

Finding Out You’re Pregnant Part 1

Finding Out You’re Pregnant Part 2

Coming Out As Trans Part 1

Coming Out As Trans Part 2

- Xiumin

Video Call

- Luhan

Rack City

Wild

Projecting

- Kris

Tutor

Game On

Oh, Baby

Camera - Ft Chen

Kitten - x Tao

- Suho

First Day

Naekkeo (Mine)

Too Loud - Ft Sehun

Valentine

- Lay

Honey

Woe, Is Me

- Baekhyun

Drown

Innocence

Worried

Misdemeanour

- Chen

Camera - Ft Kris

- Chanyeol

One More Take

High Heels

Relief

- D.O.

Goddess

Professional

- Tao

Zodiac

Alone

Kitten - x Kris

Frustration

- Kai

Play Time

Yes, Daddy

Handsome

- Sehun

Nightlife

Forbidden

Neighbours

I Don’t Wanna Share

And... Cut!

Too Loud - Ft Suho

Committed

Misc

- CPop

Wang Yibo - Not Good For You

Wang Yibo - He’s a Model, Darling

- ZEROBASEONE

Ricky x Gyuvin x Reader - Two For One

- NCT

Lucas - Study Session

Hendery - Doctor, Doctor

Yuta - Tokyo Nights

- GOT7

Jackson Wang - Drunken Love

- Wonho

Submissive

- Stray Kids

Felix - Our Secret - Full Length Fic on Ao3 (Complete)

3RACHA

Changbin - Don’t Touch

- 2PM

Junho - Unlucky Thirteen

- BIGBANG

G-Dragon - Work From Home

- HIGHLIGHT

Gikwang + Yoseob - Happy Fucking Birthday

- K-Drama

Song Joong-ki - Vacation

Jang Hanseo (Kwak Dong Yeon) - Believe Me

Ji Changwook - Daddy Issues

400 Followers Special

Click here to jump to the hashtag! All of my writings for the challenge are here.

31 Days Of Ficmas

Click here for the masterlist!

Kinktober 2022

Click here for the masterlist!

Kinktober 2023

Click here for the masterlist!

Kinktober 2024

Click here for the masterlist!

Still thirsty for more?

Check out my fic recommendation blog here!

#masterlist #fanfic masterlist #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #exo fanfic #Shinee fanfic #exo smut #Shinee smut #kpop #exo #Shinee

308 notes · View notes

kousagi7hikari · 3 years ago

Text

It’s me!!!

Name: Kousagi Hikari

Species: Human

Do they exist in a story?

Yes and no, THIS… is my Self Insert, and I will say that proudly!

What inspired them?

I got the design inspiration (mostly for her hair) from the girl playable character-Kris- from Pokemon Crystal.

How did you name them?

Her name I got from my cousin who knew more about Sailor Moon than I did, and Hikari is just a normie japanese word. Originally it was Yami, because I was into ygo back then.

Any big changes between first making them and now?

Oh absolutely, she grew up with me, so there is WAY too much to list, and probably even more stuff I never could think of

What’s the best thing about them?

She is me and can do stuff I could only dream of

What’s the worst thing about them?

I CAN’T DO ANY OF THIS STUFF. And even after 20+ years, still has trouble controlling some powers.

What part of yourself is in them?

...Self-insert *Gestures vaguely*

Do they have any hobbies?

Traveling to different worlds and just playing around, like a good self-insert!

What’s their backstory?

She travelled to different worlds, mostly Pokemon, Sailor Moon, YGO and Naruto, and then, using the travel methods of Kingdom Hearts, traveled to other worlds as she pleased. LIKE A GOOD SELF-INSERT

Do they have any friends?

Aside from the self-insert list of Everyone, she’s the avatar I use to interact with all of my other OCs! She lives with my boys!

Significant Other? Crush?

Had some crushes back in the day, Yuuri, Galo, Floyd Leech are more recent

What kind of powers do they have, if any?

Shape shifting, dimensional travel, flight, anything I imagine. She also has a magic wand to do stuff with

Any family?

Not… really? Not a blood family.

What foods do they like?

She likes what I like, so… burgers, sweets, apples...

Do they engage in combat? What do they use to fight?

All the time. She uses magic with her wand and can summon up copies of other characters from worlds she’s seen

Do they speak other languages?

Not really. Surprise!

Do they have a Nick-name or an alias?

Kay for short, Kai when in dude disguise

How do they get around?

Flight, Gummi Ship, teleportation, walking. I think she’s the only OC I have who can drive a car.

Can they cook?

Yes. Like me, she can follow directions on a recipe

Who is someone from their past?

She had a little sister, like me, but the character didn’t stick. She’s also been friends with other OCs of mine that didn’t stick or characters from media that I don’t really jive with anymore.

Art by @fangirltothefullest

#oc october #original character #my oc #self insert #it's me!!!

26 notes · View notes

eternalfarnham · 3 years ago

Text

AU where Kris is the one who falls into the Dark World on the night of the bunker, instead of Dess.

I’m imagining this happening fairly hot on the heels of Kris learning that they’re not a monster, but before they stop wearing their headband — the turmoil makes them a more attractive candidate for subsumption into the Dark World than relatively stable Dess. Ralsei retains his role as prophecy guide, meaning Kris isn’t stranded in a nowhere hellscape — I’m going to go with Dark Worlds existing retroactively when a Fountain is created, so as to give Kris something to do for all the years they’re gone — and they ingratiate themself to the Darkners pretty quickly. Card Castle sees a Lightner returned to save them from their abandonment, Cyber World sees a potential implement of growth (and world domination), etc., etc. And Kris, who doesn’t have many options and who isn’t unsympathetic to the plight of the abandoned Darkners, feeling abandoned and lied to themself, becomes their Knight and tool for subverting the prophecy.

Ralsei’s relationship with Kris is pretty strained, in both directions — Ralsei’s duty to make Lightners happy (particularly Kris) conflicts with his duty to the prophecy, which is off the rails anyway, and to Kris Ralsei is basically a living joke about how they’re deluded and/or naive. There’s a certain amount of codependence there too between the awkwardness and resentment, it’s really not healthy. Also, with sufficient time in the Dark World, Kris learns more about the whole “object duality” trick with Darkners (i.e. turning into Devilsknife, Dealmaker, etc.) and figures out how to turn Ralsei into a horned helmet and tokusatsu-style hero scarf, so they don’t have to talk to him as much and they get to keep one of their old comfort objects in a new, practical form (also it’s a cool design thing and hides their identity until a dramatic moment when they’re fighting the Heroes).

Someone else is going to have to open up the Dark Fountains and kickstart this whole thing, though. I wonder if anyone might be adjusting badly to the disappearance of their only sibling?

Some incidentals:

Noelle doesn’t lose at the spelling bee from Sister Trauma, and Berdly never gets the shot of affirmation that leads him to his current characterization, or that kicks off his friendship with Noelle. He winds up a bookish, isolated kid who never talks in class. Honestly, Noelle in this AU is probably a little isolated, with few close friends besides Catti and her sister — but maybe a little more willing to reach out to Susie on her own initiative, too. They’re friends! With some interest neither is sure how to act on, exactly. Also, Noelle strikes me as the type to idealize people she’s lost — Kris probably gets upgraded from “weird neighbor whose family is close to mine and who’s kind of fun” to “childhood best friend” in her head. She’s very happy to see them again, until it becomes clear to all parties involved that they don’t intend to let anyone seal the Fountains and deprive the Darkners of their hope (Roaring or not).

Susie’s friendship with Noelle isn’t entirely un-fraught for her; I think in canon, I think it’s easier for her to be friends with Noelle because she’s already made two close friends and gone through a Dark World tailor-made to teach her how to let her guard down. With Noelle as her one friend and the rest of the class convinced she’s bad news, Susie can’t help but get defensive and snappish sometimes. Her relationship with Kris ends up being much more a rivalry than anything at first — her opposite number, a stuck-up knight with a shining blade — and they clash repeatedly in combat. But that whole situation markedly improves once it becomes clear that Kris is fucking weird and the “noble knight” thing is an act; the rivalry is probably starting to become friendly one or two Dark Worlds in.

Spade King replaces Lancer with Kris pretty quickly, since he’s a garbage sack with two mouths on it and Kris is compliant, competent and determined. Lancer gets moved to the abandoned Castle Town with Rouxls as his minder and converts it to, basically, a little cardboard-standee playground; he ends up kinda-sorta substituting for Ralsei when Susie and Noelle fall into Castle Town, informing them of the Fountain’s nature (that sealing it will destroy the world and send them home) and how the Kings kicked him out to watch this abandoned Grand Fountain because the Knight was cooler than him. He’s a lot lonelier and more nakedly desperate for friends, and I think he still winds up being buddies with Susie when she realizes he thinks she’s cool.

Asgore is still Epic Divorce Man. Some things are a universal constant. He’s chief of police, though, since Mayor Holiday wouldn’t fire him for losing a kid that wasn’t hers, and vigilant to the point of paranoia, a big fluffy panopticon, which has been bad for his reputation in town. He regularly visits Rudy, but has a difficult time facing Dess and Noelle; Dess in particular is a punk who resents his order-and-authority shtick (and knows he’s a softie overcompensating after he lost his child). Toriel is... very lonely, especially in the wake of Asriel’s recent departure for college; she’s never been sure about whether he’s actually coping in the wake of his sibling’s disappearance. Hometown thinks of him as tragic but unbowed, facing grief with calm and equanimity. Toriel’s pretty sure he’s just brittle. Her relationship with Asgore is probably slightly better, but mostly because she needs more friends, not because she likes this Asgore any better.

Speaking of Dess: she’s not the type of person to paper over something like the bunker incident. I think in this world, where she isn’t missing, she’s likely a little bit of a conspiracy theorist, in addition to being a cool softball-playing punk; when Noelle tells Dess about the Dark Worlds, and about finding Kris there, Dess absolutely believes her first thing and insists on coming to Cyber World (or whatever Dark World is “next” after Card Castle — maybe it’s a different order, this time).

Also, the valence of all the Dark Worlds shifts to match the different emotional issues that go into them — Card Castle is shaped by Noelle’s loneliness and sense of distance from Susie as well as Susie’s defensiveness, and Cyber World is shaped by Dess’s supicion and resistance to the new order of the town (and likely both their relationships to Rudy’s illness). I think Dess opens up a Dark World in the Holiday mansion specifically to have more opportunities to investigate.

#deltarune #deltarune au #kris is basically masked man mother3 here aren't they

9 notes · View notes