#and I'm not convinced they ever lived in domestic bliss

[lesbianappreciation]

ill be honest im mainly invested in this show because aubrey plaza is really hot in it but i still think (and i say this as a fan.) 80% of agathario fans are mischaracterizing them and making them way more lovey dovey and healthy and straightforward than than they have ever been

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Chapter 20 pt. 1- I Do

Summary: It's finally here, the day you've been waiting for since the day Javi came into your life and changed it for the better- It's your wedding day, and things couldn't be more perfect. Except for the fact that you and Javi can barley contain your excitement as you wait to see each other.

Word Count: 11.4K (If this wasn't 2 parts, this would be 30k long and wouldn't be finished until May)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, praise kink, marriage kink (?), kind of semi-public sex (they're gettin' busy in the bathroom), Kind of getting caught (Steve needs to mind his own business), wedding things!!, family dynamics, mentions of death/grief, lots of emotions, Javi being an anxious, blubbering, hot mess, Javi being so in love and is so excited to spend the rest of his life with you that it physically hurts me (this chapter is lots of fluff and feelings and not as much smut, sorry!! Don't worry, there's PLENTY more to come next chapter 🤪)

A/N: Hi friends!!! Well, she's finally here, the moment we've all been waiting for- our two favorite idiots are finally getting married 😭💕 While I would have loved to make this one chapter, it literally would have been SO long, and Lord knows when I actually would have finished with it. So this chapter is the morning leading up to the ceremony, and part 2 will be the ceremony and reception!! I'm not even gonna lie, I bawled several times writing this chapter. These two mean so much to me, and I'm so honored that you care enough about them to be invested in my silly little story, too 🥺 HAPPY WEDDING DAY!!!

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For the better part of his life, Javier Peña was convinced there was nothing more soul-crushingly painful and miserable than a wedding. On a day that was supposed to be filled with happiness and joy, Javi had spent more years than he’d like to admit doing anything to avoid the occasion all together. Because for him, weddings had meant none of those things. Weddings had only served as yet another reminder of the failure he had chalked himself up to be. 

Leaving Lorraine at the altar and running away to Colombia. 

Watching the successes of everyone else’s blissful domestic lives play out in front of him, while he’d never felt so alone. 

Convincing himself that he would never be worthy of love because of the terrible person that he’d become. 

Weddings had been something that Javier Peña hated more than most things in life. 

But that was until he met you. 

Because today, on the morning of his own wedding, Javi was quite literally bursting at the seams with excitement, goofy grin stretched from ear to ear knowing that in a few short hours, he got to marry the most amazing, beautiful, perfect woman he had ever met. And even though the reality had set in that today was finally the day the two of you started your forever together, he was positive that he’d never get over the reality that you would always be his. 

As he pulled his truck up the driveway to your new home where he should have been sleeping for the better half of last night, there was a part of him that couldn’t have been more thankful he had been able to sneak in just a few more hours with you before sunrise, knowing the anxious anticipation of waiting to see you all day, let alone see you in your wedding dress at the other end of the aisle, was enough to already have his heart beating a million miles a minute at the ripe hours of the morning. 

While he should have known better his Dad would already be well awake by the time he snuck back home, Chucho’s welcoming grin from the front porch was already laced with enough forgiveness for Javi to hope he’d be spared at least some shit from his father. 

“”Morning, mijo.” Chucho chuckled, watching Javi’s sheepish stride up the driveway towards the house, slowly sipping on his cup of coffee with a boyish grin on his face, knowing damn well where his son had been without having to say a word. 

“I already know what you’re gonna say, Pops.” Javi sighed, shaking his head in embarrassment as he approached his dad, letting out a soft grunt as he took a seat next to his father on the top step of the front porch. 

“I haven’t said anything, Javier. Do you have something you want to say?” Chucho couldn’t help but snicker, raising his eyebrows at his son, as he watched his cheeks turn a petrified pink. 

“Nope, I am- oh, fuck me- nope I am, uh, all good.” Javi stammered, burying his hands in his face before running them through the sleepy curls of his hair and over the nape of his neck, his eyes still peeled to the ground, avoiding Chucho’s smug grin. 

“Then all I have to say is,” Cucho paused, taking another swig of coffee, “I hope you never stop loving her the way that you do now.” Javi looked up at his dad in confusion, wondering how his sneaking out wasn’t shaping up to be some sort of teenage scolding from his father. “I already know that you know you are a very, very lucky man Javier, but I also hope that you know you are going to make a wonderful husband. Eres un buen hombre. Estoy muy feliz por ti, mijo. Tu madre también lo estaría. Muy feliz.” (You are a good man. I am so happy for you, son. Your mom would be, too. So happy.) 

Letting his eyes shift off his feet where they had been stuck, Javi looked back up at his father, tears welling in his eyes at Chucho’s reassuring smile, reaching out to wrap his arm around his son, pulling him close enough to let Javi’s head fall on his shoulder, the two sitting for a quiet moment in silence. 

Javi couldn’t help but feel a twinge in his heart, thinking about the fact his mom wouldn’t be with him for the biggest day of his life. His mother had left this world when Javi was at his lowest- alone and halfway across the globe, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in. It had always haunted him that his mom had died worried that her son had become a broken man, and would never be proud of the person he’d turned out to be. When he returned home, he felt even worse thinking that his one living parent probably felt that way, too. 

But what brought him solace in a time that he needed it most, was you. You had given him a reason to make his parents proud, to make himself proud. While his mom would never be able to tell him the words he so desperately longed to hear, he knew in his heart that the life he’d built because of you was all the comfort he needed to prove to himself Lucia was smiling down on him when he needed it most. And as he looked up at the sky, the pink and orange rays of the beautiful sunrise beginning to spill over the horizon, he had never been more sure that even though his mom couldn’t physically be by his side, that Lucia Peña would still be with him every step of the way.  

“Fuck, I miss her, Pops. I wish she was here.” 

“She is, Javier. She always will be.” 

After soaking in a few more quiet moments together staring out into the shimmering sunrise, Chucho let out a content sigh, giving Javi a gentle pat on the back and rustling the dark curls of his son’s thick hair. 

“But, if there is one thing I know about your Mother, it’s that  I can practically hear her screeching at us wasting our time being sad about her on the happiest day of your life. Chucho, por qué piedres el tiempo estar triste? Basta de quejarte! Nuestro hijo se está casando, pendejo!” (Why are you wasting your time being sad! Stop moping! Our son is getting married, stupid.) Chucho mocked, shaking his head at the sky at the scolding he knew he’d be getting from his wife, making him and Javi burst into laughter. “And, if there’s another thing I know about your mother,” Chucho paused again, letting out a loud grunt as he pushed himself up to stand, resting his arm on Javi’s shoulder, “it’s that her and I would both agree there better be a nieto (grandchild) in our lives 9 months from now. Dios mío (oh my God), Javier, even on the night before your wedding you two can’t keep your hands to yourselves! I am truly surprised I don’t have 14 grandchildren already.” 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Pops….” Javi whispered to himself over his dad’s schoolgirl snickers, watching his son’s face fall flush once again, standing up to follow behind his dad back inside as Chuhco began to waddle his way across the porch. 

Although Javi could have tried to plead his case to his dad to prove his innocence, truth be told, today, he really didn’t care. Today, the only thing he cared about was that in just a few short hours, he got to meet you, his wife, at the end of the aisle and spend his forever with the woman he loved more than life itself. For the first time in his life, Javier Peña couldn’t have been more excited for a wedding. 

You weren’t sure how many more times you had read the scratchy print scribbled across the bright yellow post-it Javi had left behind on his pillow before he had snuck out for the morning, but you did know that your heart beat faster and faster in anxious anticipation with every glance over his words, counting down the second until you got to see him again. 

You had kept yourself in your room, convinced that your excited impatience would have you awake well before everyone else still sleeping at the ranch, but as you heard clanging and bickering starting to echo from the kitchen, you should have known better that your mom and Connie would be up to something to kick start your wedding day. 

With a yawn and stretch of your arms above your head, you flopped yourself out of bed, exchanging Javi’s worn t-shirt and sleep shorts for the white pajama set your mom had insisted she buy for you to get ready in as a compromise for your adamant despise at the white silky robe that had “bride” stitched across it in big pink letters that she had begged to buy you. 

Shuffling down the hallway, the commotion in the kitchen only became increasingly louder, now realizing almost everyone must be awake for whatever antics were taking place for the early hours of the morning. As you turned the corner, you were greeted by an adorable “Happy Wedding Day!” banner that had been made by the girls hanging on the wall, decorated with adorable crayon drawings of flowers, you and Javi, and all of the horses of the Peña ranch dressed in wedding apparel. As your eyes scanned across the rest of the room, the kitchen table was already full of breakfast, balloons dangled from the ceiling, and your mom and Connie were actively working on filling up what was most likely one too many glasses of mimosas.  

“Happy wedding day, Auntie Bear!” A little voice cooed behind you, looking down to see a still very sleepy Olivia, hair still crazed and bed ridden as she wrapped herself around your hip, squeezing you in a tight hug. 

“Ahhhhh, there’s the bride!!” Your mom shrieked, her pitch enough to make everyone in the room wince as she barreled towards you, joining Olivia to engulf you in her grasp. After everyone had recovered from your mom’s shrill greeting, everyone else had soon joined in on squeezing you in a giant group hug, the gesture in itself making you smile, but the physical restraint in the middle of a human sandwich being a little too much for you this early in the morning. 

“Thanks guys. I uh, I would like to make it out alive for my wedding so maybe if we don’t squish me to death, that would be great.” You grunted, trying to wriggle out of the arms squishing your body, hoping that someone would get the hint. 

“Alright, I think she’s probably had enough.” Connie laughed, finally noticing the look on your face, prompting everyone to give you at least a little breathing room. 

“I’m just so excited for you! I can’t believe you’re getting married, sweetie!” Your mom, clearly not picking up on the hint, was now back to squeezing you in a bear hug again tight enough to make your eyes pop out of your head. “Okay, sorry, sorry, I’m done now, just had to get one last one out of my system… for now. Here, have a seat, honey,” Your mom gestured towards the kitchen table, pulling out a chair for you to sit in, “we have about an hour before we have to start doing hair and makeup but we have plenty of breakfast for you to choose from before we get the day started. How’d you sleep?” 

“Oh, um- fine, I um, I slept fine.” You lied, now sheepishly staring down at the overflowing plate of breakfast food your mom had set in front of you, taking a hefty bite of pancake before looking back up, your eyes meeting Connie’s, a suspicious smirk gleaming on her face as she stared at you, crossing your arms over your chest as you swallowed your food with a more audible than intended gulp. 

“Oh good!” Your mom replied, obvious to yours and Connie’s silent interaction as she meandered around the kitchen. “Well, eat up, I’m off to go check on some things outside, but by the time I get back in here, that plate better be cleared! Girls, come help Grandma, let your Aunt finish her breakfast!” 

“Okay!” Your nieces giggled, following behind your mom into the backyard, leaving you and Connie alone in the kitchen, hearing her silently laugh to herself as she sat down next to you at the table. 

“Good sleep, huh? Good sleep that definitely had nothing to do with Javi’s truck that left here at 6:00 AM this morning?” Connie snickered, giving you a little wink as your cheeks turned pink with embarrassment, letting out a defeated sigh. 

“I promise it’s not what you think. I actually couldn’t sleep and I called Javi and he ended up coming over so I wouldn’t be up the whole night. I told him he didn’t have to, but I was up and stressed and having him here was the only thing that was going to help. It was just sleep, I promise.” 

“It’s okay, I believe you. I couldn’t sleep the night before my wedding either. I’m pretty sure if I did what you had done, Steve would have slept right through the phone call, or still would have been too drunk to drive over.” The two of you quietly giggled to yourselves as Connie reached out for your hand, holding it in hers, “I hope you know that he loves you so much. It always broke my heart to see Javi go through what he did, and how hard on himself he was because of it. You really are the best thing that could have ever happened to him. I’m so happy for the two of you, I couldn’t be more excited for today, honey.” 

Reaching across the table, Connie wrapped her arms around you, squeezing you in another hug, trying to hold back your sniffles as you felt happy tears beginning to well in your eyes. 

“Thank you, Connie.” 

“Of course. Now, you better pick what you want from that breakfast and throw away the rest before your mom gets back, I don’t think either one of us wants to be responsible for telling her that her food wasn’t sufficient enough for you.” 

You snorted, rolling your eyes at the thought of the dismay your mom would be in thinking that you didn’t get enough to eat before your big day as you put a reasonable amount of breakfast on a new plate to eat, discarding the other heaping pile that your mom had left you. 

“You are a smart woman, Connie Murphy.” 

“So I’ve been told.” 

The rest of the morning seemed to move by at an exponential pace- At the Pena ranch, hair and makeup was well underway for everyone, and running on time with incredible efficiency from the detailed schedule that your mom and Connie had put together. Even though your body was riddled with endless amounts of anxious anticipation and excitement as the clock ticked closer and closer to when Javi and the rest of the boys would finally get here, you were pleasantly surprised at how fun the morning had ended up being with all the girls, especially since your nieces and the Murphy girls had insisted on putting on a hilarious sing along spectacular for the majority of the time for entertainment while you got ready. 

Over at your new house, however, with the only getting ready that Javi needed to do being taking a shower and putting on his suit, the boys were convinced that he was going to put a hole in the floor from his anxious pacing as he counted down the minutes to leave. 

“Jav, have a beer, man, you just put this floor in, I think your wife’s gonna be pissed when she finds out she has to replace it before y’all even move in because you can’t sit still.” Steve chuckled, taking a sip out of his can before nudging your brothers sitting next to him on the couch as they watched their friend and future brother in law tread back and forth across the living room for what felt like the 117th time since they’d sat down. 

“I think I have to agree with Steve on this one, Javier, you are making me anxious and I’m not even the one getting married.” Chucho chimed in from the armchair seated next to the couch. 

“I’ll second what Steve said, man. Have a beer, Javi. You haven’t shut up all day about how fuckin’ excited you are, so what’s got you so worked up? You’ve seen her in a dress before dude, this one’s just white.” Your brother David snorted, his joke now soliciting some eye rolls from the rest of the boys, considering David was about single as they came, and was the only one of the group who wasn’t even remotely close to being married. 

“It’s a fucking wedding dress, you dingus, there’s obviously a difference.” Your dad groaned, walking up to your brother to give him a prompt smack in the back of the head, making your other brother Charlie snicker to himself, until he also decided to greet him with an equally harsh slap for good measure. 

“What the fuck was that for? I didn’t say anything!” Charlie winced, holding his hands up in defense. 

“Tell your brother to stop being an ass! She’s your sister too, for Christ’s Sake, you’re not gonna stand up for her either?! Jesus you two are the biggest idiots I’ve ever met. Even Patrick would have had enough common sense to keep that one in his head. Well, maybe not, but that’s besides the point.” That one at least cracked a little smile from your brothers, wishing that Patrick would have been here to see their sister’s big day, and to distribute the slapping pain more equally between the pair. 

“I just… Fuck, I just wanna see her. I can’t wait to see her. I’ve never wanted anything so bad in my whole life. The suspense is fucking killing me.” Javi signed, resting one hand on his hip before running his hand through his hair, anxiously drumming his fingers on his side, foot tapping on the well worn path he had been treading on the hardwood floor of the living room. 

Chucho chuckled, resting his hands on his knees and pushing himself up to stand with a low grunt, making his way over to his son, resting his hand on his shoulder as he looked up at him. “Eres como tu madre.. Impaciente. (You are just like your mother… Impatient). Mijo, I remember when I married your mother, she was so excited that she actually asked if we could start the wedding an hour early, just so we could see each other sooner. I can almost hear her laughing at the fact that her son is no better than her. How I wish she were here to see this. Soon, Javier. I promise.” 

“Do you think she’s gonna like the gift? You made sure she has it for today, right? And everything from her brothers too?” Javi asked, nervously biting at the tip of his thumb as he glanced down at his father before looking over at David and Charlie sitting on the couch, smiling back at him. 

“Yes, Javier. I triple checked last night. I’m sure that she will love it. I know she will love it. All of it. Now, why don’t you go put on your suit and we can leave a little ahead of schedule, I will just make sure to drive extra slow. Even slower than normal. I think if we wait any longer you may actually combust.” He teased, pulling Javi into a tight hug before releasing him, giving him a gentle pat on the back. 

“Alright boys, you heard the man, get your sorry asses moving and let’s get these monkey suits on, it’s time to get this boy married!” David cheered, holding up his beer to toast Javi before promptly chugging the rest of it down his throat and slamming it down on the table, soliciting another round of eye rolls and muffled laughter from the crowd. 

Silently nodding and smiling to himself, letting out one last reassuring breath before looking at the boys standing in front of him. 

“Fuck. I’m gonna get married.” 

Back at the ranch, the last of getting ready was beginning to wrap up, all the girls' hair and makeup finally finished, and the youngest of the crew giddily dancing in their flower girl dresses, twirling and swirling in excitement at their pristine outfits as they gathered around you, patiently awaiting for you to get into your own wedding dress.  

For as long as you’d wanted to get married, you’d always known that you wanted your wedding dress to be simple- No excessive frills, poof, glitter, or anything that made you feel like you were playing dress up for the world’s goofiest fashion show, simply because it was your wedding, and your dress needed to reflect the extravagance of the event. Your style choice came as a surprise to no one, given the fact you had practically lived in your brother’s hand-me-down’s until the 8th grade, and even when your mom had flown down a few months ago to go dress shopping with you and Connie, she had even laid down the hammer with one of the wedding dress consultants that you wouldn’t even step anywhere near a dress that was an ounce too over the top. 

That’s why you were absolutely shocked that despite your firm parameters around what you wanted to wear for your big day, that you fell in love with the very first dress you tried on, and never looked back. 

It was everything you wanted and never you needed in a dress- a simple a-line skirt with thin straps that ran across your shoulders and scooped down your back, along with a delicate, lacy floral pattern stitched across your top that flowed down the wispy length of your gown. There were few times that you had ever admitted it to yourself, but you had truly never felt more beautiful than when you were wearing that dress, and when you had tried it on for the first time, only to turn around to see the tears welling in your mom and Connie’s eyes as you revealed it to them, it was every confirmation that you needed that this dress was made for you. 

And while you had been counting down the days in excitement, waiting to put your dress on for your big day, Javi had been counting down along with you, to the point where Connie had made the executive decision to keep the dress at her house to prevent any preemptive peeking, considering that Javi had spent every day since you had bought your dress telling you how he couldn’t wait to see how beautiful you were going to look in it, without even knowing a single clue about what you had boughten, besides your lovingly sarcastic and vague “It’s a dress, and it’s white, Jav.” 

But after all the time you had spent imagining what it would be like to finally put your dress on for your actual wedding day, you almost couldn’t believe that you were finally here, carefully taking the straps off the hanger where it had been resting, holding the beautiful, white fabric out in front of you with a goofy grin spread across your face, eyeing down the outfit that meant you got to spend forever with your best friend. 

“You ready to put it on?” Connie asked softly, her hand resting on your shoulder as she stepped behind you, excitedly gazing at your dress right alongside you. 

“Yeah.” You smiled, gently nodding your head as you looked back at Connie, taking one last deep breath before passing off the dress to her before shimmying out of your clothes, letting them fall to a pile on the floor before turning to Connie, stepping into the opening of the dress and carefully pulling each strap over your shoulders while she pulled the zipper along your back, letting out a little sigh of relief as it clasped at the top. With one more long inhale, you slowly turned around to face everyone, eagerly awaiting your reveal, picking up your gown with a little floof as it gently draped around you, meeting the tears and smiles painted across everyone’s faces while they gazed at you. 

“Auntie Bear, you look like a princess! Uncle Javi is gonna think that you look like the most beautifulest person he’s ever seen.” Olivia squealed, jumping up and down in excitement before running over to you, wrapping her little arms around your waist in a tight hug. 

“Oh sweetheart…. You look absolutely stunning.” Your mom sniffled through her tears, holding her hands crossed over her chest, soaking in your full wedding ensemble. 

“You look gorgeous. Like, seriously. I hope you know that Javi’s gonna lose his mind when he sees you in this.” Connie giggled, giving you a wink and a playful nudge, looking you up and down in astonishment. 

Stepping over to see yourself in the mirror, your heart skipped a beat to see yourself, your stomach churning with anxious, excited butterflies knowing that you were only getting closer and closer to finally seeing Javi and his reaction, trying your best to not your smirk grow too wide between your warm cheeks, thinking about his reaction. 

“You really think he’s gonna like it?” You asked, your eyes still fixed at your reflection in the mirror, gently swaying your lacy, floral skirt back and forth, running your hand against the delicate fabric. 

“Honey, I’ve watched that man ogle over you in a hockey jersey. I told the boys they’re in charge of making sure he doesn’t faint when you walk down the aisle.” Your mom teased, Connie nodding her head in agreement. 

“I’m gonna second your mom on this one, girl. Steve has a running bet with the guys on how long it takes Javi to cry after he sees you. I think the over/under is 2 seconds, but after seeing you right now, I’m convinced he’s all waterworks from the moment he lays eyes on you.” 

Connie’s comment made you laugh to yourself, shaking your head at the idea of Javi instantly bursting into tears from just the sight of you, but when you thought about seeing Javi in his tux (that you had already seen before, multiple times) and what a mess you were going to be, maybe the boy’s betting line didn’t seem so unfair after all. 

“Speaking of tears…” Connie smirked at your mom, nodding at her to signify some little secret they seemed to be in on, “There’s one last thing you need to see before… Well, we’ll let you open it up and find out.” 

With that, your mom reached over to one of the tables where a white box with a neatly wrapped bow had been hidden, your mom passing it to Connie before then passing it over to you, making you tilt your head in confusion as you took the box in your hands, looking back and forth between your mom, Connie and the box waiting for some sort of explanation. 

“What is this?” you questioned, still puzzled as you noticed the gift tag hidden under the bow, gently peeling it open, their suspicious smirks beginning to spread as you read the all too familiar scratchy handwriting inside. 

To: Osita

Love: Javi

Now even more confused, you carefully began unwrapping the bow from around the packaging, letting the ribbon fall to the floor, followed by the lid of the box, revealing another longer note from Javi, resting on top of a bed of neatly folded tissue paper. You sat down in one of the chairs close by, letting the box rest on your lap as you held the note in your hands, already beginning to tremble as you felt the tears start to well in your eyes as you began to read. 

Osita, 

I knew from the moment I met you, that I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you. I can’t believe that day is finally here. I hope that this day is everything that you could ever dream it to be. 

I hope you know that if I could I would give you everything. The moon, the sun, the stars- if you wanted it, I would give it to you. 

But I know that no matter how hard I try, there is one thing I know can’t give to you, and that’s the presence of the people who aren’t with us anymore. 

And while I can’t bring back your brother or my mom to be here today, I hope that what’s in this box will remind you that they’ll always be here for you, no matter what. 

I know my mom would have wanted you to have this. There’s not a day that goes by that I wish she could have met you. She would have loved you so much. I hope she knows that you’re the best thing that could have ever happened to me. 

Your family was able to find something of your brother’s for you to have on here too- I wish I could have met him. I hope he knows how much I love you, and the beautiful and resilient woman you’ve become. I hope he knows how proud I am of you. 

I can’t wait to see you, amor. I can’t even imagine how beautiful you look right now. I’m the luckiest man in the world. 

I love you more than words, and I promise I’ll spend every day for the rest of my life making sure you know it. 

Happy Wedding Day, Osita. Soy tuyo para siempre (I’m yours forever). 

-J 

You could feel your heart practically exploding after reading what Javi had wrote for you, wiping away the wetness from your cheeks, you took a deep breath as you carefully set down his note next to you before ever so slowly peeling back the layers of tissue paper folded on top of one another, hiding the gift hidden beneath them. As the last layer of the delicate paper was shed, you let out a gasp, you hand covering your mouth in shock as you put together the pieces of Javi’s note and the present now sitting in your lap, looking up at everyone else in the room, nodding back at you with sympathetic smiles and tears in their eyes at your realization. 

Not only had Javi had given you his mother’s wedding veil to wear, but stitched in the bottom corner was a patch of Patrick’s old hockey jerseys, a small number 2 from his arm sleeve, the number he had worn for every jersey he had ever played in. 

“Oh my… Oh my god? I can’t, I- how did you- oh my god.” You whispered to yourself, your voice trembling in disbelief, tears now streaming down your face as you held the veil in your hands, your thumb gently tracing over the worn patch of Patrick’s jersey, truly too stunned to speak at what Javi had done for you, to make sure a piece of two people who were no longer with you could still be a part of the biggest day of your life.

“Can I put it on?” Your mom asked, smiling at you with tears in her eyes, walking towards you as you nodded, handing her over the veil as she gently nestled it into your hair, straightening it out behind you, even more tears streaming down her face while she watched your reaction in the mirror. 

Not only was Lucia’s veil absolutely beautiful, if you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought Javi had asked someone to see what your dress looked like to pick out a veil that matched it perfectly. Like it truly was meant to be.

Still too shocked to form any sort of coherent thought, you stared at yourself in the mirror, silently smiling and crying at your reflection until a soft knock came from outside the bedroom door, making everyone in the room whip their heads around to see all of the boys who had just arrived peeking through the door frame, waiting in anticipation. 

“Can we come in? We’re dyin’ to see you, Cubby. Well, the one who’s dyin to see you the most we banished to the outside so he wasn’t even tempted to come in, but the rest of us fools still wanna see you too.” Your dad’s voice chuckled from behind the door, making you break from your crying just enough to let a soft laugh escape from your chest, nodding your head as you turned around to greet the gang gathered at the door. 

Growing up the youngest of 3 brothers, sentimental wasn’t a term thrown around in your household very often. Of course you loved your family, and they loved you, but you and your brothers had often joked that it’d probably be easier to projectile vomit than to actually say the words “I love you” eachother. So that’s why when your dad and brothers walked through the door with awestruck looks on their faces, you couldn’t help but start crying even more. 

Well, until they actually got a chance to speak. 

“Don’t cry you dingus, you’re gonna mess up all your makeup. And god knows how long it took to try and make you look like you didn’t just crawl out of a garbage can.” David quietly snickered, pulling you in for a much gentler than usual headlock before wrapping his arms around you for a legitimate hug. 

“Fuck off, David. How many people had to help you put that suit on, huh? You use every last brain cell trying to do up those buttons?” You teased back, trying to wipe the tears that had been rolling down your cheeks before giving him a loving slap to the stomach, making the two of you laugh even more. 

“You know his dumbass needed all the help he could get.” Charlie joked, pulling you in for another hug before stepping back to look you up and down, “Not too shabby. You clean up good, Cubby.” 

“Thanks Charlie.” 

The last one to step towards you was your dad, who you could tell was trying with everything in him not to absolutely burst into tears, putting one hand on your shoulder as he smiled at you. “I’ll say it once and I won’t say it again because you know as well as I do I’m not good with the sappy shit. You look beautiful, Cubby. I’m so proud of you. I know Patrick would have been too. Although that motherfucker is probably pissed at us that we cut the number off of his favorite jersey, but I think he’ll forgive us.” Wrapping you in a tight squeeze, your dad engulfed you in a bear hug, quickly followed by your brothers and your mom, trapping you in the center of their bodies, knowing you all were wishing there was one more person there in your group to fill in your hug. 

“I love you guys. Thank you.” You whispered, just loud enough to make sure they could hear, but quiet enough that even though your brothers had heard it, just this once, they wouldn’t give you shit for it. And just this once, everyone seemed to silently agree that they really, truly, did love you too. 

After a few more seconds of your group hug, there was another soft knock on the door, followed by another familiar voice, Chucho and Steve now peeking through the doorway to say hello. 

“Is it okay if we come in, Mija?” Chuco asked, already halfway through the door in excitement. 

“Yes, of course.” You sniffed, breaking free from the middle of your group hug to greet Chucho, less than shocked that his hug was almost tighter than the 4 other members of your family combined. 

“Mija… Mija, you look so beautiful. Oh, goodness. I had always saved this veil one day, just in case. And even though it sat in the attic for years, I pulled it out the week that Javier first met you. I don’t think that there was ever a doubt in anyone’s mind that you weren’t the one for him. My sweet Lucia would have been so happy to know that you have given Javier everything he never thought that he deserved. Oh, how I wish with everything she could have been here today to see how happy you make him. But I hope that you know, she would have been so excited that you get to be a part of our family.” He grinned through his tears, stepping back to look at you with a soft smile on his face, gently reaching up to wipe away the wetness on your cheek before pulling you back in for another hug. “I hope you know that Javier is going to be a wreck when he sees you. Poor boy has been in shambles all day waiting to see you.” 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen the man this anxious. And that’s sayin’ somethin’.” Steve chimed in, laughing to himself. “You look great, sweetheart. Chucho’s right, Javi’s ‘bout to be a goddamn mess.” 

As if your heart couldn’t feel any fuller from all of the love and warmth overflowing into the room, you had almost forgotten about the one person that had brought you all together in the first place- Javi. 

You could feel the pace of your heart begin to race, your stomach swirling in anticipation as the reality of the situation slowly began to sink in. 

Your future husband was here, and there was nothing more in the world that you wanted than to see him. Not soon, not at the end of the aisle, not waiting for you at the altar, right this very second. 

“He’s here, right? Javi?” You asked, biting down on your lip to contain the stupid grin growing between your cheeks, swaying back and forth on your heels in childlike impatience. Before you could barely ask your question, all eyes in the room were on your, giving you a collective look that seemed to scream “Seriously? You can’t wait either?” without having to say a word. 

As you could hear the beginning rumblings of protest, David stepped in as the most unexpected voice of reason, holding his hands up to the crowd in your defense, trying to silence everyone’s potential disagreement for what you were about to suggest. 

“Listen… Y’all know as well as I do that we could hold back these two with iron restraints, and they’d still probably find a way to see each other before the ceremony. And to be quite honest, I am pretty convinced if we don’t let them, one of them is gonna fucking combust, and I am not willing to be held personally responsible for any damages done before you two idiots can even get married.” 

Giving you a silent nod of approval, David stepped back to pat your back with the loving force that only a brother could, as everyone else in the room seemed to very quickly agree with his sentiment, joining with head bobs of quiet agreement. 

“I’ll go let the big man know you’re comin’. Gotta find some way to redeem myself before I bust his balls in my speech later.” Steve snickered, giving you a quick wink before quickly disappearing out the door to find the man behind it, waiting half as patiently as you. 

To say that Javi was disappointed when the boys booted him to the outdoors while everyone else got to go in and see you was the understatement of the year. Even though he couldn’t have been sitting on the front porch of his childhood home for more than 10 minutes, it felt like he had been waiting for hours, counting down each second until the moment he finally got to lay his eyes on you. After about 2 minutes of sitting in his dad’s rocking chair, nervously swaying as his hands shifted between his fingers drumming on his legs and balling up in anxious fists, he pushed himself up to stand, walking off the steps of the porch to pace in the front yard under the warmth of the late June sun. 

He had been so preoccupied as he meandered the front of the home, picturing just how breathtaking you would look as you walked down the aisle to greet him- how gorgeous you would be in your dress, your hair, your stunning smile, everything about you that made him look at you and know that he was the luckiest man in the world. That you were his. That you were everything that made him feel like home. It wasn’t until after a few careless steps too far around the corner of the house, that Javi was catching himself from tumbling to the ground as he tripped over a larger than suspected rock underneath him, quietly cursing under his breath while he tried to steady himself, peering down at the ground to see what had almost caused his fall. And when he finally read the words etched into the round stone beneath him, he couldn’t help but laugh at the fact the thing resting below him was none other than the heading that read “Lucia’s Garden”. 

“Jesus Christ, Ma, you’re not even here and you’re gonna take me out before the wedding even happens.” Javi chuckled to himself, gently tapping his foot against the rock, staring at the worn and weathered letters of her name. “You know, the very first time Pops met her, he let her work on the garden. I couldn’t believe it, because he barely lets me within 10 feet of here without worrying I’m gonna ruin something. But uh, I think that he knew. I think before he even met her, he already knew that she was the one.” 

Letting out a soft sigh, Javi crouched down, squatting next to the stone, gently brushing his thumb across the grittiness, carefully tracing each letter back and forth, praying with every ounce of him that one way or another, she could hear what he had to say. 

“I really wish you could be here, Mom. I really miss you. I really wish she could have gotten to meet you. I know that you’d love her.” Javi paused, his eyes beginning to well with tears, letting out a long, shaky exhale to try and compose himself. “She’s so good to me. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve her. She’s made me a better man. A man that I’m proud of. A man I hope you’d be proud of, too.” He paused again, pinching the bridge of his nose before wiping his wet cheeks with the back of his hand. “I know that uh- I know before, um you were gone, that you really worried about me. I know you’d never say it, but um, I could tell. And I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Mom.” His voice was now barely above a whisper, years of guilt and anger bubbling in his chest for the person he’d been, the life his mother had lived to see him play out while halfway across the world, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in anymore. 

“But, I um- I just- fuck, I just want you to know that I’m okay. I’m more than okay, now. This is the happiest I’ve ever been, all because of her. We’re gonna build a house, we’re gonna have kids, we’re gonna be so happy, Mom. So fucking happy. Te amo mucho, Mama. Siempre lo hare (I love you so much, Mama. I always will).” 

So focused on the quiet conversation with the simple stone sitting beneath him, Javi hadn’t even heard Steve’s hurried footsteps creeping up behind him, making Javi practically jump out of his skin as Steve’s hand met his shoulder. 

“Hey, buddy. You ready to-” 

“Jesus, fuck Murph. You scared the fucking shit out of me.” Javi gasped, thoroughly startled as he shot to his feet, quickly trying to wipe the tears from his face as he faced his friend. 

“Sorry, man, I didn’t mean to, promise!” Steve laughed, holding his hands up in defense before letting his expression shift to concern at Javi’s face. “Hey, you okay, Jav?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m- No, I’m good, sorry. Just um- Just wish my mom could have been here for this, ya know? She would have really fucking loved her.” 

“Hey, it’s okay, man. My dad was gone before my wedding, too. Fuckin’ sucks.” Steve smiled sympathetically, “Truth be told Jav, that girl you’re gonna marry, I think it’s hard for anyone not to love her. Your mom would be really happy for ya.” 

“Thanks, Murph.” Javi huffed, a small smile spreading across his face at Steve’s genuine sympathy, a trait he didn’t see very often. 

“C’mere, buddy.” Without giving him a choice, Steve wrapped his arms around Javi, pulling him in for a hug with a few stiff pats on the back before pulling away with a nod, hands on his hips as he stared down his friend with a shit eating grin, knowing the news he was about to tell Javi would instantly turn his mood around. “Speakin’ of your future wife… You wanna see her?” 

“Wait, like, now? Like, actually?” Javi’s mood instantly shifted, his entire body lighting up at the prospect, looking at Steve with relief glistening in his dark brown eyes. 

“Yeah, actually. Thank God your wife is just as obsessed with you as you are with her. Jesus Christ, I think the both of ya would have fuckin’ exploded if we made you wait ‘till the ceremony.” Steve chuckled, grabbing Javi’s shoulder and giving it a playful shake. “Alright, you turn around so it’s a surprise when she gets out here, lemme go get her. And Jav?” Steve asked, turning his head back over his shoulder to look at his friend as he began to walk away back towards the house. 

“Yeah, Murph?” 

“You’re losin’ that bet. No way in fuckin’ hell you ain’t sobbin’ like a baby the second you lay eyes on her.” 

As Steve disappeared back into the house, Javi couldn’t help but quietly laugh to himself, because as much as he wanted to dish shit back to Steve, he knew his friend was right- He was about to be a fucking mess. 

“So? Are we good? Does he wanna see me?” You asked, anxiously waiting at the door, feet tapping on the floor hidden underneath your dress as you waited for Steve’s return. 

“No offense, Sweetheart, but that's just about the dumbest question I've ever heard. What do you think? Of course the bastard wants to see you. I’m just gonna warn ya though, that man is a hot mess, and I really think ya just may kill him the second he sees you.” The two of you laughed to yourselves, feeling your heart beat faster and faster in your chest with every passing second, using all of your self restraint to keep from bolting out the door past Steve to see Javi. “Alright, I won’t keep ya any longer, go get ‘em, killer.” 

Before you could get yourself out the door, you embraced Steve in a hug, catching him off guard for a moment before he hugged you back, smiles spread across both your faces. 

“Thanks, Steve.”

“Sweetheart, you ain’t got nothin’ to thank me for. If anything, hell, I should be thankin’ you. You two lovebirds are a match made in fuckin’ heaven. I was real worried about that old bastard for a long time. Glad to know I don’t have to worry about him anymore. Well, at least too much more. Now, enough about my sorry ass, go see your husband.” 

With a silent nod, you gave Steve one more quick hug before you were turning the knob to the front door, quietly stepping out to the front porch to see Javi’s back to you at the bottom of the stairs, already trying to fight the tears welling in your eyes without even seeing his face. As you closed the door behind you, Javi instantly perked up, turning his head back over his shoulder just enough to speak, but not enough to see that it was you who was walking to greet him. 

“She good to come out, Murph? I’m fucking dying out here.” Javi laughed, making you giggle at the fact that he had no idea it was you who was standing behind him. 

“Hate to break it to you, but unfortunately, I am not Steve. So sorry.” You snickered, practically feeling Javi’s eyes roll at your sarcastic comment, even though the both of you were thankful for a little humor to break the anxious anticipation that had been festering in your stomachs since this morning. 

“God, you’re such a dork.” He laughed, his back still turned to you as you took your final steps down the stairs with your dress in hand, trying to fluff it back out as you settled yourself behind him. 

“Hey, you’ve got me for the rest of your life, babe. Lucky you. I’m not gonna lie, don’t think I cleaned up half bad, ya know, if you wanna see.” You teased, giving Javi a playful poke on the back as you bit down on your bottom lip, so excited to see Javi’s reaction you truly thought your heart was going to explode out of your chest. 

“Baby, you have no fucking idea. C-can I, can I see you?” Javi stammered, his voice already beginning to tremble. 

“Well, I think I’m gonna implode if you don’t, so yeah.” You took one last long inhale in, holding your breath as Javi slowly began to turn to face you, feeling like everything was suddenly moving in slow motion when Javi’s eyes finally locked with yours. 

Javi couldn’t even get a word out before his hands were covering his mouth, his jaw dropping open in absolute awe to see you standing behind him. The tears he swore to himself he’d try to fight back were already streaming down his face, his eyes looking you up and down over and over again, trying to soak in every ounce of you, only crying harder as he noticed each and every new detail of you standing before him. 

“Osita… Oh my god. Oh my god.” Javi’s hand stayed glued over his mouth to try and keep his jaw from dropping any further than it already was, absolutely mesmerized by your beauty, barely able to get out any sort of coherent thought out of his brain. “Baby, you, oh my god, you look so beautiful. You look so fucking beautiful.”  

While you figured that Javi would cry and be excited to see you, nothing could have prepared you for the reaction that you were witnessing in real time, watching your future husband become a complete, blubbering mess at the sight of you, making it damn near impossible for you to hold it together yourself, considering the fact that you were also busy trying to take in the ridiculously handsome sight of Javi in his tuxedo- his broad body filling out every inch of the black fabric perfectly, hair and mustache impeccably groomed, and sweet, teary brown eyes sparkling in the sunlight, making you melt, tears rolling down your face as your heart bursted at the seams over and over again, wondering how in the world this wasn’t all some sort of a perfect dream. 

“You like it?” You managed to choke out through your happy sobs, your cheeks straining from the stupid grin that had spread across your face, the both of you radiating in the blissful glow of your excitement. 

“Like it? Osita, are you fucking kidding me? Do I like it? Holy shit, baby, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. You look... Osita, you look incredible.” Javi laughed through his tears, taking another step back to grab your hand, looking you up and down again before holding your arms up to twirl you in a circle, your dress flowing around you, making you giggle as you finally finished rotating to lock eyes with Javi again. “Hermosa, I knew you were gonna look amazing, but I- I never, I never could have imagined that you were gonna look like this.” 

“Coming from you? Jesus, Jav, I’m convinced you’re trying to kill me in that tux before we can even get married. You look so good. Javi?” You paused, grabbing his other hand so your fingers were intertwined, his thumb automatically tracing soft circles on your skin. 

“Yeah, baby?” Javi replied, biting down on his bottom lip as he gulped, trying to hold back the lump resting in his throat from his happy tears as he stared down at you. 

“Javi… We’re getting married. We’re getting fucking married.” 

“Fuck. We’re getting married. Holy shit.” As if the smile on Javi’s face couldn’t get any wider, his boyish grin gleamed between his cheeks, wrapping his arms around you to engulf you in a tight hug against his chest, the two of you laughing to yourself in disbelief that you had finally made it here- that only a few short moments, the two of you got to begin the rest of your forevers together. “Can I- Can I kiss you?” He asked in a soft whisper, pulling back to tilt his head towards yours, sliding one of his hands up to gently cup your cheek, shifting your gaze up towards him. 

“What kind of question is that, you dork?” You teased, bringing your mouth close enough to his to let your lips barely ghost over one anothers, butterflies swarming in a sea of excitement. 

“Because I’m afraid if I start kissing you, I’m not gonna be able to stop.” 

“Do your worst, Peña.” 

As if time began to move in slow motion, your mouths met with an electric and tender intensity, slowly becoming a mix of tangled tongues and teeth, your hand sneaking under the opening of Javi’s suit jacket to wrap around his waist as the grip around your face began to tighten, your bodies melting together as one in a nearly magical moment- Well, as magical as it could get before being interrupted by all your friends and family that had gathered on the front porch to share in the moment with you. 

“Hey! Lovebirds! Jesus Christ, save it for the ceremony!” Steve shouted, a chorus of laughter erupting behind him, startling you and Javi. 

“Good Lord, Steve, give it a rest. They missed each other!” Connie sighed, shaking her head at her husband’s loud interruption. 

“Yeah, that’s our sister, you pervert!” David chimed in, the familiarity of his taunting voice making you roll your eyes, putting your hands on your hips as you stared back at the crowd. 

“Will you can it, you dingus? It’s their wedding day for Christ’s sake!” Your dad groaned, slapping David in the back of the head. 

“Daddy, what’s a pervert?” Olivia asked, looking over at Charlie as Chucho held her against his hip, grimacing as he tried not to laugh at the exchange. 

“Seriously David, really? Grow up! They’re so adorable, let your sister have this.” Your mom scolded, promptly giving him another whack to the stomach, you and Javi now laughing to each other at the scene that was unfolding in front of you on the porch. 

“Well,” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge, “It seems like everyone else has been able to solve the ‘you not being able to stop kissing me’ problem.” 

“Jesus Christ…” Javi sighed to himself, running his hand over his face as he stared back into the crowd watching you and him, “Can we get a few more minutes to ourselves before the ceremony? Please? I haven’t seen her all day.” 

“C’mon, let’s give the two some privacy. Lindas (cuties), why don’t we go look to make sure all the flowers are ready. Maybe we can practice walking down the aisle again?” Cucho smiled at the two of you, giving Javi a subtle wink as the girls began to giggle with delight, racing off to the backyard in a fit of squeals of excitement. 

“We’ll do another check of everything, too, I wanna make sure everything’s in place before the ceremony. Do you mind helping, Connie? Boys, will you go check to make sure all the food and drinks are ready for cocktail hour” Your mom asked, picking up on Chucho’s hint to give the two of you some space, now trying to rope your dad, brothers and Steve into that equation as well. 

“Can I have a beer if I help?” 

“Jesus Christ, David.” 

Everyone's conversations began to trail as they headed their separate ways, leaving you and Javi standing in the front yard alone, once again,  looking at each other with mischievous grins- Yours from knowing damn well that Javi had something up his sleeve, and Javi’s from the something stored up there. 

“What’s that look for, Jav?” You smirked, crossing your arms over your chest, raising an eyebrow at Javi as you waited for him to let you in on whatever plan he had brewing in his brain. 

“I think… I think that I really have to go to the bathroom.” Javi replied, boyish grin glowing between his cheeks as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. 

“And you’re really making it seem like going to the bathroom is a two person job.” You snickered, rolling your eyes at Javi, knowing exactly what he was implying. “Baby, the ceremony is gonna start in an hour, everyone’s here and I don’t think there’s gonna be enough-” 

Before you could finish your thought, Javi was swallowing the rest of your sentence in a long, deep kiss, only pulling away to quietly rasp in your ear. 

“Is that a challenge, Osita? I promise I’ll be fast, baby, you just look so fucking beautiful, and I don’t think I’m gonna make it if I can’t have my wife all to myself, even if it’s just for a few minutes. ” 

“God, you’re such a drama queen.” You sighed with a snicker, heat creeping in your core knowing that you had just as little self control as Javi did, peeking your head to make sure that everyone had dispersed before they watched you and Javi sneak inside together. “We have to be quick, okay? I just don’t want-AH! Javi!” You squealed as Javi was scooping you off your feet mid sentence, very fittingly carrying you bridal style across the front yard and up the steps of the porch, nudging the door open with his hip, the two of you all giggles and smiles as he whisked you through the house, stopping at his childhood bedroom, promptly setting you on the ground to shut the door behind him. 

With a click of the lock and a rattle of the door handle to make sure they were safe from intruders, Javi’s hands were all over you in an instant, his mouth crashing into yours as he walked you back towards the ensuite attached to his bedroom, hoisting you up onto the kitchen sink as he shut the bathroom door behind him for an extra layer of protection. 

You could tell how hard Javi was trying to keep himself in check, considering the amount of time and effort that had gone into your hair and makeup, and the delicacy of your dress, but it was taking every ounce of self control he had to not rip it right off you. Softly letting his kisses trail down your body, Javi began to sink to his knees, smirking up at you with his awestruck gaze as he carefully began to lift up the layers of your dress, running his hands up and down your bare thighs. 

“Do you know how fucking beautiful you are, Osita? Fuck, I can’t believe you’re gonna be my wife. My beautiful, amazing, perfect wife.” The hot breath of his words danced against your skin as Javi peppered soft kisses up the inside of your thighs, his head almost disappearing underneath your dress as he creeped closer and closer to your core, already soaked with your arousal waiting for Javi’s touch. “You’re mine forever, Hermosa. Fuck, I’m so lucky. I love you so much.” 

“I-I love you too, Javi.” You whined, your breath already shaky as Javi’s fingers hooked around the waistband of your underwear, tugging them down your legs and letting them drop to the floor below you before letting his fingers glide through your folds, already glistening with your arousal. 

“Fuck, you’re already so wet, baby. Can’t believe this perfect pussy is all mine forever too. God, you’re so fucking perfect. Everything about you. Mmmm, I know we don’t have a lot of time, but I have to taste you, Hermosa. Can I, baby?” Javi mewled, making you gasp as he gently slid two fingers into your aching core, curling them to bump against the spongy spot inside you that already had you fisting at the edge of the bathroom counter to try and keep your composure, and better yet, your voice down. 

“Javi… Oh, shit. Fuck, Fu-ahhhhh.” You moaned, feeling the strong arch of Javi’s nose bumping against your clit, placing a soft kiss there before the flat of his tongue licked a long, broad stroke across your cunt, putting just the right amount of pressure on your sensitive bundle of nerves as his fingers worked in tandem to send the sweet tingling sensation to start building in your spine. 

While Javi would have loved to take every second of his sweet time to savor in watching you fall apart on his tongue, he knew just as well as you that he was working on a limited schedule, and wanted, no, needed to make sure he could get you off at least once before his luck ran out. 

Javi began to work his tongue against your clit, circling and flicking in fast and firm motions as his fingers curled deeper into your heat, his free hand hooking around your thigh and draping it over his shoulder, digging his fingertips into the meat of your flesh, like he was trying to ground himself more than you. 

You could already feel the coil in your stomach beginning to tighten from the way Javi was working so relentlessly to make you come undone, drinking every ounce of you up as, his lips now latching around your sensitive bundle of nerves, making your back arch and mind go blank while that all too familiar tingle began to creep through your core, cunt beginning to clench tighter and tighter around Javi’s fingers with every movement of his mouth against you. 

“That’s it, mi amor.” Javi cooed, peeking his head out from under you just enough so that his sweet, brown eyes were locked with yours, the hot words of his breath dancing against your pussy as his fingers continued to rock in and out of you. “I’ve got you, Osita. Forever. I’ve always got you. Promento (I promise).” 

Before you could respond, your jaw dropped open and face scrunched in pleasure as Javi dove back in, burying his face in your cunt as each press of his tongue became more firm and precise than the last, feeling your pussy begin to flutter as you clutched tighter around the edge of the counter, trying to keep from screaming out in pleasure and raise any suspicion. But as your legs began to tremble and heart race, teetering on the brink of collapse, it was taking every ounce of willpower you had left to make that happen 

“Fuck, Javi. Oh shit- Baby, I’m so close, I’m so close, I’m so cl-ooohhhhh.” You whimpered, feeling your orgasm crash through you, pleasure radiating in your veins as you fell apart, losing all inhibitions to keep yourself quiet as you threw your head back in all consuming bliss. With his fingers still buried in your cunt, gently working you through your high, Javi shot back up, his mouth engulfing yours in an electric kiss to try and capture your ragged moans that had been coating the walls of the bathroom, the tangy taste of you still lingering on his lips. 

Your heartbeat finally began to slow, your chest heaving in long, heavy breaths as you slumped into Javi, your head resting on his shoulder, shuttering at the loss of Javi’s fingers inside you. He carefully pulled them out, bringing them to his mouth and sucking them clean with a devilish smirk of satisfaction on his face. 

“Tastes so fucking sweet. My wife tastes so fucking sweet. Fuck, I don’t think I’ll ever get over that.” Javi chuckled with a boyish grin, gently cupping his hand under your chin as the other wrapped around your waist. 

“Get over what? Calling me your wife or eating me out?” You giggled, still trying to catch your breath as you came down from your high, biting down on your lip as your arms draped over Javi’s shoulders, your fingers tracing soft circles at the nape of his neck. 

“Both. Fuck, I love you so much.” 

“I love you so much too, you menace.” You smiled, tilting your head back to kiss Javi again, so blissfully lost in the moment, that the two of you both about jumped out of your skin when you heard a loud knock coming from the bedroom door. 

“Jav? You in here, buddy?” 

“Goddamnit, Murph…” 

The familiar twang of Steve’s voice made you freeze in fear, Javi quickly helping you down off the counter as he cursed to himself before the two of you were trying your best to fix yourselves up in the mirror to try and hide any signs of the horny whirlwind that had blown through the bathroom. 

“Javi?” Steve called out again, continuing to knock on the door. 

“Yeah, I’m here, just uh- Just give me a second, Murph.” Javi sighed, the two of you trying to keep from laughing at your current predicament, wondering how the hell Javi was going to talk you both out of this one. 

“What’s the plan, Peña?” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge as he carefully turned the knob to the bathroom door. 

“To tell Murph to fuck off if he tries to give me shit.” The two of you quietly snorted, feeling a little less guilty than you would have if it wasn’t your wedding day. “You stay here, okay? I’ll take care of him.” He smiled, pressing a soft kiss on your cheek as he opened the door. 

“God, I love you.” 

“I love you too, Osita.” 

Closing the bathroom door behind him, Javi took a few deep breaths as he ran his hands through his hair, turning the knob to open up his bedroom door to be greeted by an unamused Steve leaning in the door frame. 

“What’s up, Murph? We were just, uh-” Javi asked, trying his best to stay casual. 

“I fuckin’ knew it. Don’t ‘what’s up’ me, you horny bastard.” Steve groaned, rolling his eyes at his friend. “Y’all haven’t even made it to the ceremony yet! Jesus Fuckin’ Christ. Everyone’s been lookin’ for y’all. I had a fuckin’ feeling this is what you two were up two, and as your Best Man, I’ll cover for your ass now, but I sure as shit ain’t doin’ this all night for you two rabbits. Now c’mon, Casanova, go get your wife from in there and come outside. Remember that thing y’all gotta do where you actually go get married?” Steve teased, slapping Javi in the chest before shaking his head at his friend, his cheeks pink in embarrassment as his eyes darted to the floor. 

“Yeah, yeah, we’ll be out in a second.” Javi grumbled sheepishly, quietly accepting defeat. 

“An actual second, ya hear? Not a horny Javier Peña second, or I swear to God.” Steve groaned, raising an eyebrow at Javi. 

“Promise.” 

“Alright then. Chop, chop, Mr. Peña. Let’s go get your ass married.” Steve laughed, grabbing Javi by the shoulder before giving him a little shake and disappearing back down the hallway. 

Hearing Steve’s voice and footsteps fade, you slowly peeked your head out of the bathroom door to see Javi standing by himself, head buried in his hands, pinching the bridge of his nose before turning back to see your face, equally embarrassed as his. 

“... He knew, didn’t he?” You grimaced, now fully opening the door and walking through to meet Javi on the other side. 

“Yup.” Javi sighed, adding an extra emphasis to the “p” with a pop. 

“Well… Either Steve has the world’s most unlucky timing, or he just needs to do a better job of minding his business.” The two of you snickered, crossing your arms over your chest as you stared up at Javi. “Or maybe someone needs to stop being such a bad influence.” You teased, poking Javi in the chest. 

“Me? I’m the bad influence? Okay.” Javi chuckled, teasing you right back. “Sorry I’m getting married to the hottest woman alive and I can’t help myself. My gorgeous wife is one not making it any easier on me.” 

“Still not technically your wife yet, you dork.” 

“Close enough.” 

Grabbing you by your waist, Javi pulled you flush against chest, tilting his head in for a long, tender kiss- the kind that made heat creep through your cheeks and butterflies churn in your stomach, the kind that made your heart beat a million miles a minute, the kind that seemed to make everything else in the world stand still, even if just for a moment. The kind of kiss that made you know without a single doubt that you had never been more in love than you were at this very moment. 

“I love you, Javi.” 

“I love you too, Osita.” 

“You wanna go get married?” 

“Mrs. Peña,” Javi grinned, grabbing your hand to interlock it with his, “There’s nothing I’ve ever wanted more in my fucking life.”

@cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild @copperhalfcent @pedr0swh0r3 @chaotic-iguana

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Domestic Bliss Masterlist

A love that grows (ao3) - krissyxlove

Summary: Prompt: Dan and Phil with a daughter.

a thousand words (ao3) - marina_rocher

Summary: Looking at Dan through the lens of Phil's camera is its own form of art.

baby blue and bubblegum pink (ao3) - phantasticworks (steddieworks)

Summary: Dan paints his nails. Phil wants to try it.

easy for you to say (ao3) - phantasticworks (steddieworks)

Summary: Phil tries to convince Dan to throw away the grey shirt. Dan can’t do it.

Five Times Dan Got Jealous… (ao3) - JenCollins, WordsAblaze

Summary:  …And the one time jealousy was the last thing on his mind, ft. collabs, puppies, misunderstandings, unbuttoned shirts, twitter selfies, and a happily ever after. Enjoy!

food fight (ao3) - MiniGoose

Summary: A lazy morning that involves pajamas, food fights, and sticky kisses.

Forever (Can Never Be Long Enough) (ao3) - phantasticworks (steddieworks)

Summary: Phil wakes up on the morning of his 33rd birthday with sleepy cuddles. He and Dan make plans to make plans.

home remedies (ao3) - t_hens

Summary: Dan fixes the haircut phil gave himself

i'm half doomed and you're semi sweet (ao3) - dolcedeath

Summary: “Does it sound pathetic if I say I missed you?” Dan murmurs into his skin, his hands flirting with the hem of Phil’s shirt and pushing it up his back.

“Not anymore than usual.” Phil teases, running a hand through Dan’s hair and tilting his chin up with the other. Dan kind of looks like he wants to slap him across the face, but he brings their lips together and feels Dan melt against him. He grins into it, feeling triumphant.

“Say you missed me back.” Dan pouts, crossing his arms in front of his chest and falling back on the bed petulantly.

Just Need A Light (ao3) - dandrogynous

Summary: “Cuddle me,” Phil says. Sleepy, petulant, drunk. Dan loves him. “Cuddle me, let's get drunk, stay longer in Florida or I’ll miss you,” he teases as he pulls his shirt up over his head. “You are so needy.” Phil makes a face at him without opening his eyes.

Let Go Of The Reins (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Dan did not want to go home to his parents’ house the summer after his first year of studying law - which he was failing at - so when a friend suggested a simple job that would keep him busy for three months and give him a place to live, he couldn’t say no. Granted, shovelling horse shit wasn’t glamorous and he was afraid of horses, but the Lester Stables had other things going for it.

Phil was newly graduated with a video editing degree and moving home to his parents’ horse stables, even if he still would not get back on the horse since what happened earlier in the year. He had a complicated relationship with horses to begin with and he had decided he was done riding. When the new stablehand help arrives, Phil finds himself going out to the stables more often despite trying to stay away.

Letting Someone in Can Change Your Life (ao3) - winstonlives

Summary: “Fine. I will let you in. But I am not buzzing you in I'm coming down. And bringing my phone and a weapon.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

Dan shoved his phone in the pocket of his hoodie and grabbed the tennis racquet he had by his front door for protection. Once downstairs he looked out to see one of the most beautiful men he had ever seen. He very much regretted not putting on actual clothes. He ran his fingers through his hair trying to smooth out the unruly curls he knew were there from his shower. He pushed open the door and the man smiled, his bright blue eyes flashing.

“Thank you so much! I thought I was going to be locked out all night!” He said, shaking the rain off of himself as best he could while clutching a soggy pink bakery box. “I’m frozen. Sorry, uh my name is Phil. I live in 301.”

“Dan, 503.” Dan said as he followed Phil up the stairs. “So when did you move in? I haven’t seen you before.”

Of Dogs and Disobedience (ao3) - jestbee

Summary: The five times they tried to have rules for their dog, and the one time they gave up.

Pressing Business (ao3) - TeddyAsInLupin (Medliwaith)

Summary: Dan and Phil iron some clothes as they pack last-minute. Banter occurs.

soft silence / softer lips (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: A short, simple and self indulgent one shot in which Dan and Phil enjoy a lazy summer morning.

But Dan quietly reflects on how he can never hear his lover laugh, moan or cry, and Phil wonders how he stumbled upon such a beautiful person.

The city is so loud (but you drown out all the noise) (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Phil's pack might have kicked him out for mating with a human, but his love for Dan was much stronger than anything he'd ever experienced before. It wasn't easy to adjust to living with Dan in his - now their - small flat in London, but Phil would do it again in a heartbeat. With Dan by his side, Phil was sure he could get used to all the weird things humans did.

The Perfect Pizza (ao3) - sakurainrain

Summary: "This is the ultimate pizza order. Okay. We have decided this over years, and we always get this because it's the best thing."

A fic in which Dan and Phil decide what it takes to make this ultimate pizza order.

your love is my turning page (ao3) - buggieb

Summary: the one where dan and phil get a dog

[joanna-lannister]

7, 28, 37, 46, 55, 65

THANK YOU NONNIE! ❤️✨

7. Post a snippet from a wip.

Jaime shook his head in a vain attempt to chase away the memories from that night. He wouldn't dwell on such a thought. Instead, his mind focused on what mattered, on the family Cersei and him were about to build in the tiny cottage near the shore with its walls covered with ivy. A family on their own with Cersei as his wife, it was all he had ever desired, and he could already picture how sweet he would kiss her the moment he would walk through the door, and how her lips would taste the orange cakes she had baked this morning to satisfy her craving. The thought drew a smile on his lips.

from AOUI Chapter 08

28. What area of writing do you want to improve in?

Descriptions. I feel like I lack vocabulary sometimes because I'm French, and I'd really like to improve that.

37. What fic has been the hardest for you to write?

Def "grieving for the living". Killing Jaime off was hard, but I'm proud of it.

46. If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?

King Jaime AU! I'm so obsessed with that idea (if you couldn't tell ahahah), I could turn it into a Canon AU or a Modern AU. There is so much you can do with it!

55. Have you noticed any patterns in your fics?  Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

Oh yes! I have expressions that appear a lot like "a smile bloomed on her/his face" I need to stop using it lmao Also themes such as Pregnancy, Childbirth, Fluff, Motherhood and Domestic Bliss are recurring.

65. If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would happen in it?

Okay, let's go freestyle but it would be "grieving for the living", Cersei would have given birth to their baby for around two years now and Tywin would find out where she lives, and then he would try to convince her to come back at Casterly Rock, but his plan wouldn't work out.

[notmanagingmymischief]

𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤-𝐨𝐫-𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐲 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧

Well, here's the last Halloween short. It was meant to be the first but of course i fucked it up and it didn't post. fml.

anyway. Enjoy <3

--

warnings: none

--

enjoy xx

Halloween wasn't really a big deal with the Warrens, usually. They mostly just let Judy dress up, go out for a while, then come back home. Ed was too nervous that Judy would get harmed, and Lorraine knew that the spirits and various demons that roamed around these parts quite enjoyed getting around that night. That is, until a few years ago. When you came into their lives. You appeared like a hallucination and took over the Warren's lives like a whirlwind. You'd gotten close with Lorraine, and then Ed, and before any of you knew it you'd ended up in their bed. Six months later, the couple had asked you to join their relationship as more than a bedmate, and you'd eagerly accepted. That was two years ago, now you live with them and are existing in lovely domestic bliss; besides the demons of course.

But today is Halloween, and for once you've convinced both of them to let you take Judy out. You've already donned your costume, a rough rendition of Morticia Addams, and are helping Judy braid her hair into Dutch braids to match your theme as a teenage Wednesday. With one done, you move onto the second, and ask "So, are you excited?" The brunette smiles and replies "Um, yeah, of course I am! Mom and dad never let me go out for more than, like, thirty minutes." You chuckle, shaking your head at your partner's overprotectiveness. They obviously had a reason to be wary, and they weren't wrong for being nervous about this kind of thing. But they trust you, and you would never let Judy get hurt. Ever. Once you tie off the second braid, dropping it to lay against Judy's chest, you stand back up and clap your hands together, smiling proudly. "You look absolutely amazing, darling," you exclaim, and Judy grins, spinning in place to show you the whole costume. It looks amazing, of course, so after a bit of dark eyeshadow and eyeliner, she's done. You do the same for yourself, putting on your fake nails and makeup.

With one last nod to yourself in the mirror, you gesture to the door for Judy to follow, and head out into the sitting room, where Lorraine and Ed sit together talking quietly between themselves. You clear your throat, gaining their attention, and the two brunettes glance over to you and their daughter. Fond smiles immediately bloom on both their faces, and Lorraine is the first to stand and approach you. She cups Judy's face between her hands, tilting it to the side and inspecting your work. Then she looks to you and says "You did wonderful, darling." You shrug, smug smile playing on your lips as you state "Of course I did. I've been trick-or-treating since I was a kid, I know what I'm doing." Lorraine rolls her eyes playfully but steps in front of you anyway and presses a soft kiss to your lips as Ed also appears at her side, checking out his daughter and then your costumes, nodding in approval. "Wednesday and Morticia, eh?" he asks, and Judy nods eagerly, making the three of you chuckle. After a few more minutes of talking through the rules, you promising to stay safe and that you know how to take care of yourself, and giving your partner's quick kisses, and you're off.

You quickly check your lipstick in the mirror by the door and sigh when you see it slightly messed up, quickly fixing it and calling out "You messed up my lipstick!" It's teasing, and faintly you hear Ed shout "Too bad!" and it makes you laugh. You don't get the chance to respond before Judy's dragging you out the door with a laugh of her own. A dark leather bag over Judy's shoulder, the two of you turn right and start heading down the block. You point out decorations and laugh when Judy's eyes light up at the bright lights and skeletons draped with spiderwebs. Within thirty minutes, you've gained at least a dozen compliments on your matching outfits, and have had four women say something along the lines of "Aww, how sweet, you and your daughter match!" and each time you've laughed, thinking "If they only knew." Plus, Judy already has more candy than she's ever gotten in past years, apparently--it's a thought that makes you very happy, and quite proud of yourself.

Soon, you approach a large house, dark and ominous; the perfect stereotypical Halloween mansion. You can feel Judy's nervousness from where you stand, and as much as you love the girl, you also know that no Halloween is complete without at least one scare. Plus, you know the people who live here, and they're amazing at that kind of thing--you've gotten spooked more than once here. So with a little smirk, you gently push her up the walk and towards the house, mumbling "Go on, I'm sure it looks scarier than it is," and the girl believes you. You almost feel bad for taking advantage of her trust like this...but not quite. So you watch her take cautious steps towards the looming home, glancing rapidly side to side, just waiting for something to happen. But nothing does, and you see her relax almost imperceptibly. But not even seconds later, she lets out a scream as someone sprints at her in some sort of devil costume, running past her with a shout. Judy jumps backwards and you burst into laughter, holding your stomach as you cackle. Judy glares back at you and shouts something like "Screw you, y/n!" It makes you gasp and hold your chest, calling back "Language, young lady!"

She just rolls her eyes and walks forward again, as confident as she can. It seems like the home owners are going easy this year as the only other scare they do is swinging the door open with a loud "boo!" that makes Judy jump back again, holding her chest and breathing heavily. The older lady in the doorway laughs, and holds out a whole handful of candy to drop into Judy's bag. She catches sight of you and another smile spreads across her face as she waves, calling out "Hey, y/n!" You smile back, jogging up towards the house as you reply "Evening, Diana!" The blonde asks how you've been and you shrug, making a so-so motion with your hand and saying "Pretty good. Taking Judy here out for her first proper Halloween," as you clap your "daughter"'s shoulder, an action which earns you a grumble from the girl. You exchange a few more words with Diana before dismissing yourself with a wave and returning with Judy to the sidewalk. Once you're away from the house the girl mumbles "That was mean of you, y/n." You sigh, bending down a bit and apologizing for not telling her. "I'm sorry sweetheart. I just wanted to let you get in a good spook. I won't let it happen again, okay?"

The brunette nods, and you two continue on with your night. But as it starts to get dark, and you check your watch to see it being nearly 9, you finally say "Alright, time to head back. Your parents will get worried." Judy sighs unhappily, but doesn't argue, knowing you're right. The two of you talk quietly about the night as you return home, Judy swinging her candy bag by her side with one hand and holding yours with the other. It only takes ten minutes or so before you've arrived, and you let Judy go inside first, closing the door behind her with a soft click before following the hyperactive child into the sitting room once again. Unsurprisingly, you find her parents sitting there, Lorraine cuddled up against Ed's side, who has his arm around her shoulder. She looks to be napping, but wakes as soon as Judy skips into the room, exclaiming "Mom, dad! We're back!" The woman sits up quickly, standing and looking over the two of you before finally relaxing once she knows you're alright. With a relieved sigh, she comes forward, listening to Judy tell her all about what the two of you had gotten up to. You gain a playful glare from both of them when Judy mentions you conveniently forgetting to tell her about the one house's reputation for giving children heart attacks.

Once Judy takes a breath, pausing her rapid-fire speaking, you finally get to cut in with "And we were very careful, so you don't have to worry about anything." Both Ed and Lorraine give you a grateful look, and you earn a soft, loving kiss from the latter that you sigh into contentedly. Soon the four of you settle in for the night, agreeing to let Judy stay up a bit later than normal to watch a movie, still in costume. She acquires the spot between her parents, while you get the luxury of cuddling into Lorraine, a position which doesn't take long to become your head in her lap as her runs her fingers through your hair. And once Judy goes to bed, Ed pulls you up so you're draped across both of them, legs across Lorraine's lap and head now on Ed's. He leaves a kiss on your forehead, your nose, both cheeks, and finally your lips, each one making you giggle breathlessly while Lorraine's fingers run across your thighs. It's not an action meant to lead to more, simply a soft, comforting touch that leaves shivers on your skin through your dress. The three of you spend the rest of the night there, and when you also go to bed, you fall asleep with the feeling of Lorraine's head snuggled into your collar and Ed's arm wrapped around both of you protectively.

[twoidiotwriters1]

Copycat: Cryptomnesia —(Marvel Fem!Oc)

A/N: I know I’m using all the Matt gifs in the world that is bc I love him -Danny

Words: 1,327

Phase Five Masterlist

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

Listen to: ‘When Am I Gonna Lose You?’ -by Local Natives

vii: Alone

It was getting old saying she couldn't remember something ever happening. But she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt miserable without doing anything to deserve it. Though that was a stretch, she'd killed some strangers, but Matthew didn't know it, he was mad at her because she didn't want to talk.

"I'm going to work," he walked past her.

"Have a good day."

"I'll come back after midnight," he added.

"I'll start moving my things back while you're at work," Cat said.

The man opened his mouth to respond but nothing came out from it. It wasn't like she was doing this out of spite, she'd never promised to stay, they'd been entertained by their domestic bliss, but now it was time. Cat would quit her job and stress about getting a new one, she didn't want Matthew to witness that, he was a safe space.

Matt cleared his throat. "You need help?"

"I didn't bring any furniture with me," she shrugged. "I can carry bags on my own, thank you."

That'd been all she'd done for the past two years anyway, carrying all her stuff alone. With one or two breaks to carry someone else's.

Matthew nodded. "You'll sleep here tonight?"

"Yeah..." she wanted to add "I wanna feel you near me one last time" but thought it'd sound like some kind of emotional manipulation. "Need to tidy up my place."

He gave a step forward and lightly kissed her cheek, he hesitated a moment, and she waited.

"Call me if you need anything."

She smiled, but it was empty. "Sure."

Matthew was good to her, he'd only grown distant because he was afraid of what a deeper commitment would bring into their lives, he'd gone through enough heartbreak already. Cat didn't know what it was like to have her heart broken, she'd lost friends and family, but never a lover.

Her lack of experience was playing tricks on her, she was convinced that he was disgusted by her actions and that he no longer wanted her around. Yet, she still refused to talk about it. All she had to do was fix everything herself so Matthew could see she was good, and then he'd trust her again. All was okay, she just had to wait a little, and once everything was over they'd be happy.

She heard a thump against her living room window, Cat went to inspect and found Felix sitting outside, waiting to be let in.

"Baby!"

The fluffy white cat purred against her chest for as long as Cat held him, she scattered kisses all over his tiny head, wrinkling her nose at the smell of trash and old fish coming from him. She lifted the cat and stared at him.

"Will you let me bathe you?" The cat gazed at her sternly. "Please?"

Felix did a short, cutesy mewl, and then bumped his head against her chin. Cat took him to the bathroom, where she closed the door. The feline stared at her intrigued, she went to the tub and began to fill it with hot water for two minutes, then cold, and kept going until it was full enough.

The cat watched her from the toilet, she took her drenched hand and reached to hold Felix carefully. He licked the droplets from her fingers, then bumped his head against it. Cat made him stand with his two front paws at the edge of the tub.

"I'm sorry, I can't have you stinking the whole place."

He tried to fight it, and Cat's hands ended up scratched, but eventually, the pet enjoyed the warmth of the water and the way she rubbed behind his ears. After forty minutes of arduous yet devoted work, Felix went from being a seemingly white cat to an actually white-as-a-cloud creature. She wrapped him in a towel and carried him out of the bathroom, he was crying like a baby.

Her phone was buzzing when she went to the kitchen, it was almost seven, but that was too early for Matthew to be calling. "Mouse, answer the phone, please?"

"You got it."

"I know what you're going to say," Yelena's voice came through. "But wait until I tell you."

"Am I a hostage here? Why hasn't she sent the papers?"

"You have one last mission," the agent replied. "Before you whine about it, you should know it's in New York, so you don't need to leave your Matthew."

Cat frowned. "I send my resignation and they reply with a mission? Why are you calling me and not De Fontaine?"

"I'm billing her for this. Anyway, a company wants to transport expensive construction stuff out of the island, but they're asking for extra security."

"Okay."

"Really?" Yelena sounded glad. "I thought I'd have to hear you complain about it."

Cat placed Felix near her feet, the animal quickly squirmed out of the towel and started to lick his legs frantically. "I'll sit around waiting for things to happen and I'll get paid and then that's it? I won't have to kill anybody, which is great. I just think it's weird the UN is getting involved in a construction matter?"

"Oh I think it's for a restoration or something, I don't know. Maybe they're finally fixing the statue of liberty. I'll tell the company guys to call you."

"Tell Valentina to call me too."

When Matthew came back she was curing her scratches.

"What happened?" He approached, gently holding one of her hands.

"Felix," she let him examined her, glad to discover he wasn't entirely indifferent to her yet. "Gave him a bath. He was not amused."

Matthew brushed the tips of his fingers against the injuries. "He'll be dirty again in less than a week."

"Cats lick themselves clean. As long as he doesn't stink I don't mind the rest..."

"How did the moving go?" He pulled a chair to sit in front of her.

"All my stuff is there, so I hope you won't mind me sleeping naked."

"Oh, not at all," Matthew used both hands to hold hers, rubbing his thumb against the back of it. "Karen said something about a girls' night..."

Cat blushed. "I promised I would go out with her but... I've been busy."

"You want her number?"

"I should have it, yes..."

After a moment of silence, he continued. "Have you thought about..."

"About what?"

"I heard the accords got repealed."

She smiled, it was the first genuine one in days. "The more I think about it the less I can believe it. I signed that thing when I was fifteen, and now that's gone some things repeat over and over in my head and it's..." her eyes lost focus for a moment, she realized something. "Makes me feel like all that was for nothing."

Matthew tilted his head. "Is that the reason why you quit your job?"

She decided there was no harm in this, given that he was acting pretty cool about it. "I needed to be sure I was doing the right thing—"

"Not killing is always the right thing—"

"I meant for me," she frowned. "I was cornered into a bad place."

"By who?"

By ghosts. She was standing with her back against a wall and the thing that had her frozen in place was the abyss in front of her. Complete darkness that echoed her friends' voices made it impossible to think about her personal interests.

"By duty," she said. "I owed it to them... it's my job to follow the rules they fought for, cause they're meant to make the world a better place."

Matt shook his head a little, not believing her. "I know you lost people you cared for... but I don't understand why you'd waste your life for their sake."

"Because they saved me," Cat frowned. "And I'm not wasting my life. You don't know who I was before them."

He stopped stroking her hand, a little annoyed. "I know I don't know. That's exactly the problem."

There was a time in which having Matthew's hand intertwined with hers made her feel steady."We have each other" she remembered saying that was enough, but now, sitting in the middle of his apartment with his full attention on her, like she'd wanted all those years ago, Cat felt entirely misunderstood.

Next Chapter—>

Taglist.

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[ybcpatrick]

favorite peterick fics?

hi!! so i answered an ask about this last year too, and gave five of my absolute favourites! but i'm ALWAYS happy to give some more jskajfksjf

under the cut, let's go!!

feels like home by lye-kisses (5.2k, Teen and Up Audiences.)

Spend a day with Pete and Patrick. Pure domestic bliss.

AUGHHHH this is one of the newest ones on this list and it is sososososososo good, sweet like candy absolute tooth rot. also pete is lowkey thirsty for patrick and that is so fuckin funny sndjajfkzfj.

a bright tide by whatimages (2.6k, Teen and Up Audiences.)

Drifting around each other, on a beach in Australia, Pete and Patrick contemplate themselves and iron out the details. A pocket of time, spent together, as they always are.

You have to be logged in to find this one!! but AUJGGHGHSJSLFJFLGJ!!!!! Oh my god this work is so quiet and moody and contemplative and you can cut the romantic tension with! a! knife!

plain as they can see by fanatic_by_definition (3.6k, Teen and Up Audiences.)

Curled up in the van in the wee hours of the morning, Pete introduces Patrick to The Nightmare Before Christmas. As the story plays out before him, Patrick starts to notice... parallels.

this one makes me soft. i love me some vandays!fob, they're so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺. and it's so immersive to follow along with patrick's thoughts here, and it's even better if you're super familiar with the movie, too. but i don't think it's necessary to have watched nightmare! when i found this fic initially, i had never seen it, but this fic convinced me to watch it. so good.

the afterlife (i never really lived) by TooRational (2.9k, Teen and Up Audiences.)

The polaroids from Coup De Main’s article give Patrick three things: major anxiety, a boatload of embarrassment, and a wake-up call in regards to how much he’s let go unsaid between himself and Pete over the years.

ohhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS ONE. OKOKOK patrick is: a dumbass. i LOVE this fic because i love any fic that tears into patrick’s psyche. but, i really do have a soft spot for this characterization of him: knowing he’s not necessarily a words guy, because he’s so used to pete being that for him, ‘cause he has been since he was sixteen years old. and patrick, hating his lack of words, summoning any he can possibly find before something happens, pete responds and something snaps and patrick resorts to action.... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

the tale of two hearts (reunited) by TooRational (5.5k, Mature.)

After a year away in service to the Queen, Peter finally gets to return home, where his beloved husband is waiting for him. In the tumultuous reintroduction to peace, Peter shatters; Patrick catches the pieces before they hit the ground and begins the repairs.

historical medieval au my beloved <3 this fic is so heartstoppingly good it is so soft it is so illustrative it is sosososososo tender. and it’s from pete’s perspective!! i tend to gravitate more towards patrick’s pov but we love a change in pace. historical accuracy be damned, this au is wonderful and i think about it constantly. also, i remember the first time i read this, the moment pete and patrick finally lock eyes took my breath away. 

and yes i listed two toorational fics what abt it. she is very talented and one of the best peterick authors out there. read all of them, actually, they could all be on this list. 

Guided to You by intocooperstown aka. @setting-in-a-honeymoon​ (11.4k so far, ongoing, Mature.)

Pete and Patrick are dead. They are dead, in a pristine office, sitting before a magnificent, otherworldly creature. The creature tells them they are soulmates, and they will spend the rest of eternity together. That’s confusing for a lot of reasons, but if it means being with Patrick, Pete will take it.

This one is currently ongoing!! I rarely-if-ever read chaptered fics before they’re finished, but the premise of this one was too compelling not to. and also, honeymoon is my fwiend!! and she’s sososo talented!! this fic has everything u could want: soulmates, mutual pining, mild gay panic, and pete&patrick being an obvious, inseperable duo (or at least, obvious to everyone but themselves). cannot wait to see how all of this unfolds :00000

i could probably go on for years but i’ll stop here. if u wanna look thru my bookmarks on ao3 you’re also more than welcome!! there’s a lotta other good stuff in there too :)

[british-bombs]

( TO BEAT THE DEVIL ) An introduction.

FORMAT: teleplay / novel

GENRE: horror, coming of age

LOGLINE: An interning demon drives a pair of twins cursed with obedience and honesty to kill their cult leader.

THEMES: Trauma, sexual abuse, domestic violence, victim blaming (particularly self blame), peer pressure, redemption, internalized homophobia, and religion.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Sexual abuse, violence, domestic and otherwise, manipulation, and death

EXTENDED SUMMARY, CHARACTERS, EXCERPT AND NOTES:

Carmine can taste it. They're hiding something. Humans have such a silly smell about them, turns an overwhelming shade of sweet when they've made a demonic deal. All four of these children have. He just can't figure out what, and more importantly: why.

It keeps him on the surface longer than he should be. Long enough that Lilith sees it fit to send him a fucking trainee? And if that wasn't insult enough, the trainees one of the eternal teenage know-it-alls.

He's already got four annoying toddlers to trail, and now there's one tugging his hand in the new generation's approach to soul-catching like Carmine isn't one of the best employees they've had since the turn of the century.

And somehow, to make it all worse, the trainee is good at it. And if Carmine wants to keep his spot at the top of the food chain, he's going to have to get the soul of that dumb bitch who's running the joint.

But, of course, the kid gets him murdered??? And then has the nerve to figure out how what those toddlers managed to stick their syrupy, grubby little hands in. What gives?

But two can play at that game. If he can't get the dead guy's, then he can have the next best thing.

Jesse has lived just under seventeen years, but he's ready to check out. Or he was. But of course, some selfish bastard had to come along and say you can't ever act on those thoughts again! Don't think like that!

And then the hole kept getting deeper.

Six feet deep, to be exact. He's got blood on his hands and no matter how fucking good it felt to cut off the air supply to the God who stole his innocence, it's probably not going to feel very good to watch his mom suffer through a highly publicized trial with headlines like CHILD MURDERS HIGH PROFILE BENEFACTOR!!!

Oh. Well. Billy did say if he really got in that deep, he could always strike up a deal. His soul, everything wrapped up in a nice little bow, sweet as Easter Sunday. But until then? Yeah, he's content to live in a stupid fucking Sherlock Holmes novel.

CHARACTERS:

JESSE NIX: A soon-to-be seventeen-year-old saddled with the curse of obedience. Unlike miss-lucky-Ella-Enchanted, he wasn't told to give away his mommy's locket. No-siree. He was told to give away his virginity. In his opinion, the only appropriate payback is a life. Maybe, one day, if he really snaps, he'll dig up Pastor Dallin's corpse and chop his dick off. Really stick it to the man. If he doesn't go to prison first, anyway. (spotify playlist)

NANCY NIX: Also a soon-to-be-seventeen-year-old, though saddled with the curse of honesty. It's really not so bad. That is, until she stumbles across the sight of her dearest little brother covered in blood for no reason he can push through his metal braces. She refuses to believe he did it on purpose. If only she could convince the cops without sounding like a nutjob. (spotify playlist)

BEVERLY PINES: A seventeen-year-old cursed to feel the pain of those around her. It makes for some fun family dinners with a sadistic mom and a missing dad. Distance nulls pain, but she can't ever seem to make it past state lines before her mom gets wise and breaks one of her ribs. Oh, well. She's got a bone to pick with psychos like her mom. Apparently, Pastor Dallin was one of them. She doesn't think she could stomach the pain of killing someone, so next best thing, right? (spotify playlist)

CLARICE ANDERMANN: Also a seventeen-year-old cursed to be constantly in motion. It's honestly not that bad. She's Yale bound! Perks of having endless energy for everything to cheerleading to debate contests, though she can't imagine her heart's going to keep up like this. It's already hanging on by a thread. That thread is named Beverly Pines and like hell she's letting it go to prison for nothing. (spotify playlist)

BILLY: An annoying fuck trapped in a seventeen-year-old's body. No curses. The opposite, in fact - blessed with a silver tongue and a keen sense of deduction. It takes him all of two hours to put together (almost) everything about Jesse Nix. He just didn't think he could push the repressed little fuck to murder that quick. (All the more power to him, though. Prison always makes people desperate and paranoid, AKA: an easy mark.) (spotify playlist)

MAVIS EVANGELISTA: Former housewife turned grieving widow turned revered prophet. If she got a little help from someone downstairs, then who's to know? They love her all the same. Now, she really, really wants to see how far she can push them all. (spotify playlist)

CARMINE: Just a helpful guy, passing through. Really doesn't need anything, just a little pledge, is all! And then? Then, you can have everything you want, fame, money, power, love. The sky is your limit. The water's fine! (Ignore the piranhas, they'll wait till you're dead to eat your face, just a little bit.) (spotify playlist)

NOTES:

- all of these characters have equal importance within the story.

- personal tag system for story stuff is '#tbtd' and character tags are just first name (ex: '#jesse')

- this is kind of really fucked up. the only reason i wrote it was cause i was thinking damn ella enchanted really is NOT fucked up enough. like i don't think the author of ella enchanted went dark enough. a locket? that's it? a bitch move. i'm taking it to straight murder and sexual abuse

- jesse transgender, no character straight except evil people

- i'm not entirely sure how tag lists work but i think i get the gist of them?? idk if you want rb or ask or something </3

EXCERPT:

There were moments, where she was reminded just how different this voice was, how violent.

She had found Lynette, making off with her makeup that she’d spent her own allowance on. Mavis doted on her and, from what she’d seen of other families, everyone else looked upon their little siblings with contempt, despising the burden they dragged along with their existence.

But Mavis adored Lyn. When she'd been born, her mother had come home with a tiny thing bundled in pink fleece. Mavis had taken to Lyn on sight, thinking Lynette’s headband adorned with a baby blue bow was the universe’s way of telling her happy birthday! as reparations for the ones her mother had missed while she was enduring her week long stay at the hospital.

But that mindset was a disease, one that had finally caught up with her. Had Lynette not become her burden? She was nineteen, busting her back day and night so Lynette wouldn’t have to, that she might avoid the life that Mavis had lived in those blissful six years where it was her and her alone.

Had her mother not tampered down her birthday celebrations since Lynette’s was so very close and they couldn’t afford double anyway? Had Lynette not deprived her of the teenage experiences she heard her classmates speak of, going out and tasting alcohol for the first time while Mavis followed a ten year old Lynette house to house so she could complain of a stomach ache after she’d devoured all the candy on the walk back home?

And now this! Stealing her few precious items, the few things she bothered to save up for, few things she bothered to keep hidden. For what? It wasn’t as though she was ever going to have the courage to ask a peer of her’s out. She was a thief.

One Mavis had made the mistake of taking care of. She should’ve embraced those stirrings of resentment, should’ve left Lynette to her own devices since Lynette didn’t appreciate anything, or even half of what Mavis afforded her. She should’ve left her out in the cold that Christmas. How could anyone have known? It wasn’t as though corpses could talk--

She had let Lyn take off with the whole case, as if to remind herself when she woke up the next morning what she had considered, how vile the thought was.

Lyn had never done anything unforgivable to Mavis. Mavis didn’t suppose she ever could. It was no fault of Lyn’s she didn’t understand what it was like to live with their father. How could she? It was a topic off limits to Lyn by both Mavis and their mother. After all, a child born blind doesn’t know until it’s pointed out to them.

And yet, she found guilt hard to summon. She did, but the speed at which it came, the strength, made her uneasy. What had happened to the girl she was? Lyn had been her world. What had changed?

Then, dully, that other voice, entirely of its own volition, said You did.

[areiton]

Happy 300th episode, Supernatural!

I'm not watching tonight but I'm super excited and so happy for our boys and fandom! So here's 14 (one for every season!) of my favorite SPN & Destiel fics to celebrate!

~

Nintey-One Whiskey by komodobits

In the spring of 1944, the 104th Medical Battalion of the United States Army is disbanded, and its men reassigned to various infantry companies in preparation for their invasion of occupied France. For First Lieutenant Novak, this is less than helpful, as he has so far met his platoon’s designated medic a grand total of twice, and has both times found Sergeant Winchester to be the optimum combination of reckless, arrogant, and downright insufferable so as to make cohesive platoon function near impossible. When the time comes to move out, however, Castiel has to reconcile himself to the fact that men are going to go down and trust that Dean Winchester may well be the only person who can put them back together again. WW2 ETO infantry AU.

~

A Turn of the Earth by mishcollin

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

~

Still Life by @catchclaw

Dean'd always thought that falling in love was a capital letter kind of thing, an Important Event you carved into the calendar of your life and never, ever forgot. But with he and Cas, it wasn't that simple.

~

Breathe Lightly by nhixxie

"To my first love, and my last, Dean Winchester. These are the things I want to tell you: the human body is 60% water. The number of neurons in one person is the rough equivalent of the number of stars in a small galaxy. There is 0.2 milligrams of gold in your blood. The heart is an elaborate engine. I love you."

~

The Unwavering heart of a Winchester by @violue

There’s no point in mincing words. Sam is dead, and without him Dean is a drunken shell of who he used to be. When he finally pulls himself out of a growing pile of whiskey bottles, Dean finds it hard to go back to his life. With one flippant comment from a friend, Dean thinks he might finally have a way to make peace with the loss; Sam was an organ donor, and Dean’s going to find the recipients, talk to them, and see how their lives are better because of his little brother. For the first six stops on his road trip, things go mostly according to plan, and then he meets the man who has Sam’s heart. Dean had hoped he might find peace on this trip… he never expected to find love.

~

Stray by Morgan

“Dean’s always been the type to pick up strays, even though he knows he can’t keep them. Most strays you just patch up and feed before you send them on their way.” One day he runs into a stray he might actually want to keep.

~

Gravity vs Velocity by PaperAnn

Newton's law of universal gravitation states that any two bodies in the universe attract each other with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between the two bodies.

Dean swears he feels an honest-to-goodness gravity (not any scent-true-mates-bullshit) pulling him to a mysterious omega and makes the worst mistake of his career... he only has one thing to say...

Fuck science.

~

Ad Astara by nhixxie

One day Cas says, "Stars died for you, Dean Winchester", against ruffled hair perched atop sun kissed skin and sleepy eyes.

Dean stirs, moving to spread his palms against the contour of Cas’ back, tips of fingers languidly strumming the indentations of his spine. One, two, three, four, he counts, the closest he could get to scientifically studying the anatomy of the human body.

"Is this some physics crap again?" He frowns with eyes closed.

Cas smiles softly. "Far from it."

Dean’s fingers play at the base of his back, ninth thoracic vertebrae, Cas notes.

"Then tell me all about it."

~

The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses by Askance

Almost two years after the world doesn't end, Castiel falls from grace—and loses his voice in the process. It is the impetus for confession and change; before long, he is settling into a loving relationship with Dean, the Winchesters are tired, and hunting for a place to land has taken precedence to hunting anything else. Dean and Castiel fall in love with the strange little house on the end of Swallowtail Drive, and for a little while life is as it should be—sweet, affectionate, and beginning afresh.

But more and more Castiel sees and hears things in the house that beg the question of whether or not a place itself can be alive. The walls and rooms seem to shift and grow and breathe, and one night, Dean comes home from a hunt changed in a way that Castiel cannot explain. In the months that follow, their domestic bliss takes turns for the dark and sour, and the confusion of their circumstances will ultimately test everything Castiel knows about the man he loves, and everything he believes to be true.

[Dean/Cas Big Bang 2012 - masterpost with artwork can be found here on livejournal.]

~

All Things Shining by Askance

Something in the world is waking up.

It isn’t long before it’s brought to the attention of the Winchesters and Castiel: miracles are spreading across the country, the paranormal seems to be shrinking back on itself—and it all has something to do with the missing prayer book of a traveling preacher who died over a century ago.

Dean is convinced it’s all the lead-up to another Apocalypse; Sam and Castiel aren’t so sure. Regardless, it sends them out on a less-than-typical road-trip, following the Mississippi and remnants of a very old story that seems increasingly to call to them. And along the way the trio learn much more about themselves—and the consequences and origins of love—than they’d ever have anticipated.

~

The Cold Fusion Job by @la-rubinita

Castiel Milton is a brilliant electro-chemist at the peak of his career. He’s developed the ultimate energy source, the science behind it promising to revolutionize the world energy market and combat climate change in a way few could have ever dreamed. He’s proud of his work, but he’s grown restless and is more lonely than he realized. He’s ready for a change.

Dean is a thief and mercenary by trade, on a mission of absolution with his rag-tag family. But when the nastiest skeleton in Dean’s closet rears its ugly head, Dean is put between a rock and a hard place: steal Castiel’s research or Sam dies.

It’s all downhill from there. Dean is not the only thief after Castiel’s work, and no one is pulling any punches. Castiel ends up along for the ride, stepping up time and time again, as determined to save Sam as he is to protect his life’s work.

Dean doesn’t know what to do with Castiel and his too-blue eyes that see more than they should, or the growing affection he has for him that, like everything else about this wild night, is completely out of control.

~

Take the Long Way Home by @catchclaw

How do you know that somebody loves you? When they kiss you? When they come back? When they stay? Or is it only real once you hear it, once they say it, that thing that's always been true: I love you.

*AREI NOTE: this is Wincest, give this a pass if that's not your cuppa.

~

Path of Fireflies by @museaway

How do you know that somebody loves you? When they kiss you? When they come back? When they stay? Or is it only real once you hear it, once they say it, that thing that's always been true: I love you.

After his humanity is restored, Dean wakes up in bed with Castiel, a wedding ring, and no memory of the past twelve years.

~

Domo Arigato (Mr. Roboto) by @destimushi

Even as civilization is falling apart around him, Dean’s personal losses inspire him to create new beginnings and a second chance at happiness. Playing God isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and Dean soon finds himself stuck between a rock and a hard place: do the right thing or cling to the ghost of a past life?

[privilege-archives]

ALEXANDRIA MCINTOSH ➝ FOURTH SIBLING

I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN

❖ FULL NAME: Alexandria Christine McIntosh. ❖ PRONOUNS: She/Her. ❖ AGE: 20. (August 10th). ❖ BIRTH ORDER: Fourth. Adopted. ❖ GRADE: Junior. ❖ MAJOR: Psychology, with a minor in Art. ❖ SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Pansexual. ❖ ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Panromantic. ❖ FACECLAIM: Hayley Kiyoko.

I'LL FOLLOW YOU UNTIL YOU LOVE ME

[TW: Domestic abuse, miscarriage]

Though it comes as a shock to many, Christine had always been in the spotlight. She was a socialite who’d never had to work a day in her life, and that didn’t change after Alex was adopted. Despite the media making them out to be martyrs who were now taking care of a newborn who would have otherwise been abandoned, Christine had little to do with her children before they could talk and walk. Alex was instead raised by nannies and, when time permitted, their father. However, as soon as she was able to talk and walk and sing, Christine was thrusting her into the pageant spotlight. Christine loved putting her in frilly dresses and makeup, forcing her to parade around on stage and perform degrading-ly cutesy acts–and she were good at it. She had a cute little smile and dimples and enough personality to charm the judges with a simple look. Christine basked in the glory that her child was bringing her.

It was around the time that she was 10 that Alex started to pull away from the fanfare she’d known her whole life. She didn’t particularly enjoy singing, even if she was good at it, as it had always just been a way to win another trophy or crown. Instead, she’d found love in art. Whether she was painting or sketching, she was escaping from the hectic life that she’d been brought into. Alex began refusing to participate in pageants, though she was only permitted to stop doing them after she deliberating lost one particular competition. Christine then agreed to allow Alex to focus on her art.. So long as she agreed to begin modelling. She refused at first, but eventually gave in when Christine offered to enroll her in art classes alongside her modelling classes. This is also around the time that Gordie put Alex in therapy, wanting to give her an outlet that didn’t involve her mother, and hopefully begin working on the severe anxiety that she had developed. Said anxiety was only to be expected, her therapist said, when dealing with a mother obsessed with fame and good looks.

Things were smooth sailing from there, up until they landed their own reality show while Alex was 15 years old. The Apple Never Falls Far From The Tree put the family more into the spotlight than ever, and suddenly Alex didn’t have much opportunity for solace. What she did have, however, came in the form of Martin. He was everything her teenage heart wanted, and then some. The “some” being that he wasn’t famous, something that made him seem so much more real to Alex, when it really should have been a red flag. They’d been acquainted through school for quite some time, but he finally started paying attention to her as soon as TANFFFT began airing. She thought nothing of it, however, believing instead that he’d just finally worked up the courage to speak to her. Their romance was a whirlwind one, starting suddenly and skyrocketing. The first three years of said romance were blissful. They were TV’s favorite young couple, attractive and sweet and having minimal problems on display. That didn’t stop what went on behind closed doors, however. Martin was controlling and obsessive, needing to know where Alex was and who she was with at all times, becoming angry and violent when she disobeyed him. She was able to put it behind her though, for the most part.

And then she got pregnant.

Somehow, she had been able to convince herself that Martin would want to have a child with her. They were only 18, but she thought they were so in love. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. Instead, Martin became incredibly angry at her when he was told, literally attacking her with both words and his fists. He left her broken and bleeding at the bottom of a staircase, where Lène eventually found her and rushed her to the hospital. There, they learned that the attack had caused Alex to miscarry. The media had a field day, which Christine cared more about than the fact that her daughter had been pregnant with the child of her abusive boyfriend. As this all happened around the time that college acceptances were being handed out, Alex completely withdrew from it all and settled for PSU, where she’s studying psychology and art.

BABY, THERE'S NO OTHER SUPERSTAR

Alex’s style is extremely casual, the years of being forced into frilly dresses and put on display being enough to turn her off to anything flashy or girly. She’s typically wearing some sort of hat or beanie and sneakers like vans or converse. Although her hair is naturally a dark brown, she prefers to bleach it and occasionally streak colors through her blonde locks. Currently her hair is quite long, but she has a habit of randomly chopping it off when bored.

YOU KNOW THAT I'LL BE YOUR PAPARAZZI

The McIntosh family have been in the spotlight from as far back as anyone can remember. Beginning most notably with their great-great-great grandfather, Peter ‘Pug’ McIntosh, who played basketball for the Peach Baskets in the late 1800’s. After retiring from the sport, he was inspired to purchase and grow his own orchard, Pug’s Peaches, which was passed down through the generations. All of his male descendants have been big sporting names, right down to Gordon ‘Gordie’ McIntosh, known by his fans and teammates as The Mac. Gordie started out playing baseball for the Boston Red Sox, before transferring to Los Angeles at his wife, Christine’s, request. He now plays for the Dodgers.

Christine was born and raised in Los Angeles to a family of know-it-all socialites, and met Gordie during a trip to his Boston hometown during her early twenties. Despite having never truly worked a day in her life, Christine thinks of herself as a queen and lives the lifestyle. Christine’s best friend since childhood is the famous Kardashian Momager, Kris Jenner, with the two constantly competing to have the most famous and successful family. Like Kris’ family, Christine saw to it that the McIntosh’s got their own reality show, titled The Apple Never Falls Far From The Tree. It has been ongoing for five years now, and is still as popular as ever. Again, like Kris, Christine now considers herself a Momager to all of her children, and pushes them into the spotlight constantly.