#and I'm disappointed in myself for not getting more non-western music in here

[pyrettawychwiggin]

The Rantings of a Chairside Tooth Fairy - A Prologue, Part 1/2

Note from the author: Being a dental assistant is... a mixed bag. It differs from assistant to assistant based on where they studied (if they studied), what country/state/province they work in, what office or specialty they work in, etc.

For the sake of this series - I am a registered dental assistant in western Canada, and as of the time of this entry, I've been assisting for about four years.

These rantings are my own, and don't necessarily speak for all dental assistants out there. Our job can be incredibly unfair and rip-your-hair-out-frustrating sometimes, and I've found that sometimes, screaming into the void is a good way to cope.

That's what this series will be. Just one itty-bitty tooth fairy who needs to blow off a little steam.

Consider this a prologue to my rantings. This post will just kind of tell you a bit about myself, how I got into assisting, and the posts to come will be all the juicy stuff that other people who work in the dental office may be able to relate to on a pretty personal level.

In this series, I'll be going by the name of Fae Rhee - for no particular reason aside from it makes me giggle.

Alright, let's get into it...

Let's set the scene...

It's a chilly evening in the middle of September. 2019.

There's a woman, mid-to-late twenties, twiddling her thumbs behind the counter of some little neighbourhood convenience store. And she's perpetually fed up.

Yep. I'm that woman. Fae Rhee.

Everything about this place bores me to tears; the shirt they make us wear is equally as itchy as it is unflattering. The customers? Generally entitled and entirely lacking in basic empathy. The hours? Garbage. The benefits? Non-existent. The pay? Don't even get me started.

A mixture of rain and snow is blowing just beyond the glass doors of the thankfully empty store. There's still a little daylight left, but I've got another four hours left to go in my shift. That sun'll be long gone by the time I get out of here.

This isn't where I saw myself when I was younger. If you'd told me in my teen years that I'd be standing here of all places, you'd have been met with the shocking realization that I even lived long enough to see adulthood, followed by the utter disappointment in myself.

Don't get me wrong- I've been working retail and customer service basically ever since I took on my first job at a fast food joint when I was 15. I see no shame in working in any of these positions. No, my disappointment stems entirely from my unhappiness. I was supposed to accomplish so much more, do so much more, be so much more. Yet here I am, where every agonizingly slow second that ticks by feels like another second wasted - and for nothing.

I pop out for another cigarette - the only way I was about to get a breather outside of my pathetic little lunch break. There's no customers, anyways. I thought to myself. That should pass the time if nothing else.

I step outside to see a middle-aged man sitting on the cement at the edge of the parking lot. He's a familiar face - one of our regulars. He's very clearly homeless, and he looks rough around the edges, but as far as my interactions, he seems a decent dude. He's never caused any trouble, and he only comes in to buy food and cigarettes whenever he's scraped enough to manage that much.

When the manager's around, he demands that he not be served, but when the manager's not around, the man's more welcome than most of the asshats that I have to serve with a smile.

I pop back in and ring through a couple goodies under my employee discount and head back outside, taking a seat beside him.

I hand him a cigarette and a sandwich and we shoot the shit for a few minutes before a familiar car pulls up.

"Fae!" my manager pops his comically large head out from his car. "I'm not paying you to stand outside the store and suck on cancer sticks."

"I'm on break. Besides, look around you." I stretched my arms out to gesture at the empty store and parking lot. "Not a soul in sight. I'll be all of five minutes."

"Is he eating one of our sandwiches?!" he spat. "I thought I told you not to serve him."

"I didn't. I served myself. I bought the sandwich. So technically, it's mine."

"And he's eating it because...?"

"I decided I didn't want it after all. So I'm sharing it with him." I shrugged. "Last I checked, that wasn't a crime."

"You should have thrown it out!"

"Well, that's a waste of money and a perfectly good sandwich."

"Just get back inside, Fae." The manager sighed in resignation, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't want to have to write you up again."

"Yeah, yeah." I put out my nearly-finished cigarette and purposely left my unopened bottle of ginger ale with the homeless man. As I opened the door to the store, I mumbled under my breath. "Did you come here on your day off for a reason, or did you just need someone to yell at?"

"What was that?" he said, folding his arms as he followed me inside.

"Nothing at all, boss-man. Now, what can I help you with, and please make it fast. As you can see..." I popped behind the counter and eyed the empty store. "I'm a very busy woman who needs to get back to doing her very busy woman things."

"I just came to check on the store."

"Well, as far as I can tell, everything's still in one piece," I sighed. "Anything else?"

"Yeah, actually." He pulled out his phone and started texting someone as he spoke. "Jenna won't be in at her usual time - I need you to work overtime tonight."

"Can't," I clicked my tongue. "Got plans."

"Cancel them, then," he shrugged, clearly disengaging from the conversation. "No one else is willing to come in, so you drew the short straw. Sorry."

"I am leaving at eleven," I replied, gritting my teeth in irritation. "Whether there's someone here to man the store or not."

"No, you're staying until one." The manager rolled his eyes and tucked his phone away with a sense of finality. "It's already been approved by the DM. Figure it out."

"Are you kidding me...?"

"And at least try to look busy, will you?" He opened the door with a look over his shoulder. "Better for our image. 'Night."

Fuck your image.

I leaned over the counter as he shooed the homeless man away before driving off and let out a groan of frustration.

A few minutes later, as I scrolled my phone to pass the time, I saw an ad that caught my eye.

'Tired of your dead-end job? Apply today to start your journey into a new career!'

"Huh. That timing, though." I chuckled under my breath. "It's a trades college..."

I frowned, lingering on the ad for a moment.

I barely graduated high school. Most courses from any college or university I could go to required courses I never took. I filled up my time with band, choir, jazz and musical theatre, and mostly skipped the other classes. Hell, sometimes I even skipped the music classes just to practice music on my own down the hall.

There was a time I wanted to be a meteorologist. Or a marine biologist. Maybe an actress, or a singer. Perhaps a firefighter.

Now? I didn't know what I wanted anymore. The options available to me felt unattainable at best.

Yet for some reason, this ad that I would have mindlessly scrolled away from any other night had me frozen in place.

"Ah, well. What's the worst that could happen?" I tapped on the ad and started filling out an intake form. "They'll probably take one look at my transcripts and laugh, but it'll beat spending my afternoon here of all places."

I clicked on the final 'submit' button and was met with a message:

'Thank you for taking the time to fill out our intake form! An admissions counselor will be in touch with you within 24 hours.'

Good for me. I think I deserve to go home a little early today. I stretched, making my final decision. I headed to the back room to change out of my shirt, leaving it haphazardly on the manager's desk, locked up and left the store behind me for the last time. Good riddance to bad garbage. Anything has to be better than this.

To be continued...

[nimblermortal]

Fire Logic

@spiritintheteapot​

Overture to Coriolan (Beethoven) The original is about one man wanting to start a war, and the people sent to stop him from sacking Rome. Harald G’deon trying to hold things together

Lookin’ for the Time (Nanci Griffith) I work this corner from eleven to five and my hands get cold around midnight / and you’re asking me if I’ve got the time? / Well I don’t know but you’re wasting mine tonight - Dinal in Lalali

Starlight (Wailin’ Jennys) I have come back to this border, take me home / And my body bears this trouble, take me home Zanja

Children’s Work (Dessa) You’ve learned how to hold your own how to stack your stones but the history’s thick / Children aren’t as simple as we’d like to think Norina and Karis, who are still children when they’re put in each other’s care

Dies Irae (Mozart) The wrath of god Shaftal, Mabin, the war, fighting...

Romans 10:9 (The Mountain Goats) Wake up sixty minutes after my head hits the pillow, I can’t live like this Medric

Buy a Dog (Luce) I had a dream, it was a good dream, you were there and so was I / I was so happy I did not want to open up my eyes the Picnic/Medric propositioning Zanja

Everything Old is New Again (Barenaked Ladies) Everything old is new again, everything under the sun All of our fears come true again, recycle reuse, resent and refuse, our parents’ ideals and views Medric and Emil, Karis and Mabin

Absolute Lithops Effect (The Mountain Goats) With a little bit of water, and a little bit of sunlight, and a little bit of tender mercy Karis under drugs, being given more time, and taking her healing in her own hands

Dear Theodosia (from Hamilton) If we lay a strong enough foundation, we’ll pass it on to you, we’ll give the world to you and you’ll blow us all away Leeba

[chenoehi]

My thoughts on Grammys, BTS, and the Academy's supposed 'diversity'.

Can't do 'Keep Reading' on mobile guys so if you don't care about it keep on scrolling.

.

The only BTS music I thought might have a slim chance for a nomination was "Boy With Luv (ft. Halsey)" as a pop duo collaboration. That was it. Anything more than that was just wishful thinking.

The Academy (both Grammy and Oscar's) talk about diversity when controversy comes up, they give some Black artists and actors awards, they look like try-hards, and then the next year they repeat history. Each year more men continue to be nominated than women, even in years that women dominated the industry. Each year artists who push boundaries continue to be overlooked or less favored than more traditional artists. Each year recognition continues to be bulk awarded to the most basic artists with the most basic styles with the most basic music, often times the same (mostly white) artists each year. No one get me started on always having to award artists like Taylor Swift or Ed Sheeran or Adele each year they make music, despite whether or not what they put out is actually good, original, or better than what they did the year before. I'm not singling them out, but I think they illustrate my point. I will make one exception for Adele because she is a phenomenal singer, although I did not personally believe 25 deserved to sweep; I've been told by fans that Ed Sheeran is a good performer, so I'll give him that but I'll keep my thoughts of his music and the rest of my opinions to myself. But I get tired of artists like these getting nominated every time or almost every time they put music out and then getting awards every time they're nominated, hence sweeping. It gets tiring when the music that frequently-awarded artists put out sucks and they keep raking noms because of who they are.

There is absolutely nothing BTS or any other Asian et al. artists can do to beat that system. None of the criticism in the world has changed it thus far and I don't know that anything ever will. It's a hard institution to tear down. They will use "diverse" artists for ratings by inviting them and having them hand out awards and, in BTS's case, making such a big deal as to even display their Grammy outfits in the museum, and then they will refuse to nominate them.

It's a back handed compliment to non-Western artists. The Academy is saying they're good enough to help win over a predominantly younger and more diverse generation of viewers but they're not good enough to be awarded for their achievements.

What's worse is, the only expectation I had was for the Academy to invite them as performers despite whatever minuscule nomination they might have garnered, because it's been clearly hinted they would attend another Grammys and the Academy would frankly be fools to not have them perform after the shitstorm going on the pop industry rn. If you know anything about the Taylor Swift situation (you may not be able to tell which one because there are always so many) who knows if she will be performing this Grammys, and her medley of her songs was supposedly going to be a highlight; something's always stirring things up so who knows if certain artists don't end up going at all or bow out of performing. Ariana Grande bailed on the 2019 Grammys because the Grammy producer wouldn't let her perform songs she wanted to, and these kinds of disputes happen and artists who are nominated become no-shows. So, the opportunity to invite a group with a huge following, who have already proved to increase ratings, seems like a sure move right?

But BTS can't exactly perform at the Grammys if they're not nominated for a Grammy; I don't see them doing a tribute any time soon either. And if the Academy even dares to invite them at this point for a performance it will be an insult and a transparent ratings grab. BTS may still go to avoid appearing as if their pride has been wounded or just because they want to go regardless. They know better than their fans how it feels to lose, to be discarded, to be overlooked. This is happening to them first and foremost, not us. And if they decide that they will deal with this the same way they dealt with all their other struggles, to push on, perform for their fans, and use the opportunity of exposure for what it's worth, then support them and their decision. I, for one, won't be watching it live regardless of whether they are there. If all the Academy wants is ratings from BTS fans when they are fine with treating them like garbage, they won't get ratings from me.

I fully believe that the Academy is not only discriminatory to non-Western, non-white artists but that failing to nominate BTS for any award at all is out of fear. Fear that their traditional, safe artists will be offended and boycott the awards if they lose out on a nomination, fear that their fanbases will retaliate, but more importantly, fear that BTS or any other gigantic force of a non-Western artist may be a shoe-in for whatever award they are nominated for and potentially sweep if allowed to compete with all other artists. This comes after BTS won Best Group at the Billboard Music Awards this year. Their first time being nominated for a major U.S. award category. It wasn't even a Best New Artist schtick. It was a main category and they were up against established, popular, Western groups like Imagine Dragons and Maroon 5. It comes on the heels of Super M earning number 1 debut album and beginning a successful tour they are on right now. It comes after Blackpink performed at Coachella and toured the country. It comes after NCT 127 and ATEEZ toured the country. Even TXT, a months old group, had successful showcases in major U.S. cities.

The Academy is too racist and xenophobic to acknowledge Asian artists--they always have been and they always will be. The most diversity we'll see is the nomination of Black artists, but still only 2 were nominated for SotY whereas 4 were nominated for RotY. I don't know the exact numbers, but any time I've ever kept up with the awards I don't see very many other diversity groups being represented in nominations either, such as artists with disabilities or LGBT artists who have different gender expressions and identities or sexual orientations that impact their music, performance, and artistry. Halsey's intimate performance at the BBMAs with that female dancer was huge because that's just not something that's really done. Still. And any time it does happen it's a Britney and Madonna moment all over again, it's a fetish to everyone. Progress has been made but it's very minuscule in comparison to the 'diversity' touting approach they've taken.

I'll just leave the words of this morning's Rolling Stone article here:

So, the Academy selectively extends its diversity goodwill just as they always have. No shade to the artist, but just using this example of Lil Nas X versus BTS, you have a young Black, gay artist who started his career in late 2018. He's nominated for some of top Grammys with a minimal discography--an 18-minute EP. This is groundbreaking, it's great. BTS, a 6-year-old established group of young Korean artists who break nearly every record there is and dominated Western charts this spring, and they continue to chart Billboard and Western streaming platforms. They earn no nominations.

The two artists ironically happen to have a collaboration in the form of Old Seoul Road.

Congrats to Lizzo and Lil Nas X (that's not shade at Billie btw) but this tweet from the New York Times is so unbelievably misguided because the Academy's conception of diversity is like seasoning with mostly salt, a little pepper and no cayenne (hate to use that analogy but am I wrong?):

I do appreciate that some artists who don't get nominated a lot got nominations, but looking at the list of top awards I just can't imagine how some of those got through. And I listen to a lot of different music and some BTS stans may have know idea who the fuck Bon Iver is and I'm not saying they don't deserve nominations period, but when you look at the list it's just mind boggling how a song like BWL that was listened to and appreciated like a summer anthem would be could not be included in that mess. (Vampire Weekend for Album of the Year, what, who the fuck, is that, they've been around since 2006, that's when I listened to nothing but metal and rock and I don't, know who the fuck this obscure band is? I may have heard of them once eons ago but they apparently made no impression? I'm sorry). I won't go as far as to say BWL was a Western summer anthem because much of the gp still doesn't know them, this is true. But apparently that's never stopped the Academy before. Bonus, anyone remember Bon Iver winning Best New Artist over Katy Perry all those years ago? No, just me? Good times. (Respect to Bon Iver, I'm just making a point that a lesser known artist won that award over a popular artist and the public went "waH?" Bon Iver being nominated for Record and Album of the Year this time honestly has the same effect as before because what is Hey, Ma even. I listen to Indie music so. What it is.)

Anyway. That's my thoughts. Expect nothing and you won't be disappointed is a myth. You will always have room to be disappointed in humanity.

Edit: while I'm at it, a big, massive fuck you to the Academy for never nominating Halsey for Without You.

[youspoketome]

My Favorite Albums of 2018

I tried something new this year. All year long, every time I bought a new album I added it to a note on my phone as a list so that I could adjust the order as needed. Some things settled into their order quickly, but a couple spots went down to the wire. Embarrassingly, I was just looking at my 2015 list and six albums on that list were the previous albums by six of the bands on this list, and one was a solo album by the singer of a seventh band listed here. I'm not quite sure what that means in the grand scheme of things. And that seems like a long enough introduction, so here we go!

Murder By Death - THE OTHER SHORE

Honestly, I thought Murder By Death was finished having albums on top of my best of lists. I had been so disappointed in GOOD MORNING, MAGPIE. That album had like two good songs, but the rest was at best forgettable filler and at worst sounded like a parody of themselves. The two albums since then had definitely been better, but still not at the levels of their earlier albums. Enter THE OTHER SHORE: an incredible return to the long form concept album following a story of love and dying planets in a western in space. It's full of catchy hooks without ever being clichè, small character moments and big, world-ending finishes. Best of all, it's got ripping 2-minute long cello solos. This is peak Murder By Death right here.

mewithoutYou - [UNTITLED]

mewithoutYou is another band I've loved for years, but thought was coming off of a weaker album. I enjoyed PALE HORSES (it made my top ten list the year it came out), but it didn't have anything that really grabbed me and made it a necessary part of the mwY canon. [UNTITLED] immediately feels important. It's not the most easily accessable album, but when have mewithoutYou ever been accessable? This is an album that has layers that you can appreciate as you dig down to them on further listens. Over the years mwY's sound has evolved from the heavier hollerin' of [A->B] LIFE and CATCH FOR US THE FOXES to the completely clean and folky IT'S ALL CRAZY... and back again. [UNTITLED] really blends things together by taking the heaviness from early albums and adding them in for flavor rather than building the songs around them, giving the songs depth and intensity. For my money, it's their best album since BROTHER, SISTER. Still waiting on that album/EP collector's edition to ship though, so no pictures.

Gregory Alan Isakov - EVENING MACHINES

I've enjoyed Gregory Alan Isakov's previous albums of folky songs fit for sitting on the front porch at your farm while reading an old book, but whenever I'd see him live my favorite song was always the non-album track "Liars" and I'd always wish he'd record it. That song seemed darker than anything else he'd written and had this slow build to an epic climax that almost gave you chills. He finally did record it on his studio album with the Colorado Symphony in 2016 and then he followed that up with his most eclectic album yet. From the soft and haunting opener "Berth," all the way to the end, EVENING MACHINES expands on what Isakov is willing to do, keeping that same welcoming, mellow feel, but getting there in new ways and with new instruments. "Caves" captures that darkness "Liars" had in a way that is wholly satisfying to me. It feels like he wrote the album I didn't even realize I had been wanting him to write all along.

Emery - EVE

I've always enjoyed Emery, but it wasn't until their last album YOU WERE NEVER ALONE when they broke the album down song by song on a behind the scenes podcast that I fully appreciated them as musicians. Unlike a lot of bands that came out at the same time in the same genre, Emery is a band with multiple members who have actually studied how music works and can point out and name every single time signature and key change in every song. Now with EVE, I've been able to listen to the little details, noticing and appreciating the attention they give to every little part of each song. The way they don't add the screamed vocal at this part of the song because that seems to obvious, so they save it for when it'll be more striking. How they add the harmonies and layer the vocals. Some bands with that kind of background forget how to write a catchy song or what makes a song enjoyable to listen to, but Emery has this ability to perfectly blend this crazy musicianship with honest, straight from the gut songwriting. The end result is an album full of fantastic songs with awesome little parts and details that make it special and stand out.

Thrice - PALMS

For me (and a lot of people, I think) Thrice and Thursday have always been kind of linked. I discovered them at the same time, both on their second albums. They were post-hardcore bands, similar enough sounding to compare to each other and they both started experimenting with their sound on their fourth albums. Then they both announced they were breaking up within a day of each other. The weird thing is when I first discovered them, I preferred Thursday hands down. Then they both released their third albums and cemented my opinions of them, so much so that I decided not to buy Thrice's fourth album when it came out. Man, that was a huge mistake. That fourth album, VHEISSU was the album when Thrice hit their stride, expanding and exploring their sound with each release since then. Each of their post-reunion albums have continued this trend and PALMS might be their best full album yet.

Frank Turner - BE MORE KIND

To be honest, I'm surprised this album is this far down. If you had me rank my expected best albums of the year list at the beginning of the year, Frank Turner with have been number one with a bullet. But BE MORE KIND was not the album I was expecting, and I was a little let down by it. That I'm saying that my number 6 album of the year was a bit of a let down should tell you how highly I think of Frank Turner. It starts off strong with the mellow opener of "Don't Worry" followed by a full on banger in "1933." But the third track "Little Changes" just didn't hit for me. It seemed like Frank Turner dumbed down for the masses. And it's not that it's too poppy; I enjoy myself a good pop song. It's just that the songwriting seems so simple. There are a number of really good songs throughout the rest of the album (like "Blackout"), but the overarching feel for me is that it's too simplistic, there's no depth to any of the songwriting. All that said, it's hard to rag too much on it because how can you bash an album that's sole message is to be kind and positive and to treat other people decently? Maybe it's that message that made him lose his teeth. In summation, I like Frank Turner a lot, even when he's disappointing me.

Smoking Popes - INTO THE AGONY

INTO THE AGONY is the Smoking Popes first album in seven years. They were putting out albums more frequently than that while they were broken up! After being broken up from 1999-2005, the Popes returned with STAY DOWN, which was not the strongest album to come back on. It was mostly a downer and ended up being completely forgettable for me. This time, upon returning from a seven year album cycle with new album they've knocked it out of the park. It's upbeat and catchy, it's slow and meaningful, it features Josh Caterer's soaring vocals, and it's another fantastic entry into the catalog.

Death Cab For Cutie - THANK YOU FOR TODAY

I think Death Cab's existence as a band is better broken up into stages. You've got the pre-TRANSATLANTICISM era, the TRANS/PLANS era, NARROW/CODES, and now KINTSUGI/THANK YOU. TRANS/PLANS is my favorite era. It's where I discovered Death Cab, it's where I spend the most time with them, it's just the best. But after a bit of a dip there for a couple albums (not saying they were bad, it was just a dip), I felt like KINTSUGI was a step back up, and now THANK YOU FOR TODAY continues in the same vein. It's a more electronic/synthy sound than previous eras, which sets it apart from their highest peaks, so you're not just constantly comparing it to something they'll probably never reattain. I really enjoy where this era is taking them.

Alkaline Trio - IS THIS THING CURSED?

This past summer I decided to give Alkaline Trio's AGONY & IRONY a listen for the first time in I don't know how long. Everyone agrees Alkaline Trio used to be good and then got less good, and I agree, but that specific album was for me the low point, mostly because of "Love Love Kiss Kiss." But then this weird thing happened: I really enjoyed it. Even that song, which is still doofy, wasn't as bad as I remembered. I was so bummed out about it at the time, but that album has some really good songs on it. Even at their lowest point, I still really like Alkaline Trio. IS THIS THING CURSED? is a new Alkaline Trio album. It's got Matt songs, it's got Dan songs, it's got one Dan song that kind of too doofy (Little Help?), it strangely has multiple song titles that end in question marks, and it has an acoustic closer featuring Matt's scratchy-voiced wailing. This is another solid Alkaline Trio album.

The Decemberists - I'LL BE YOUR GIRL

Every year at the same time, all of the baseball websites post their top prospects lists, where they rank the upcoming minor league players in all of baseball or on each team individually, so people can get excited about the next wave of baseball All-Stars. In almost all of these lists you've got your top five or six guys who are clearly the best players in that team's minor league system in that order, but then at about number seven they kind of become interchangeable for a while. You could switch prospect #8 with #12 and no one would cause too much of a ruckus because they're all pretty similar at that point. We've reached that point in my best albums list (really, we reached that point with Alkaline Trio). These final couple spots could have also gone to 6666 by Four Fists, 9 by Saves The Day, KIDS SEE GHOSTS, or if I was in the right mood, even the new MXPX or the Matthew Thiessen solo album. What pushed I'LL BE YOUR GIRL across the line was (a) my wife's incredulousness at my mentioning it might not make the cut and (b) the fact that "Once In My Life" and "Everything Is Awful" have full-on been our anthem songs this past month. This is the Decemberists doing what they do. Folky songs about sea monsters, horse gallop rhythms, and cowboy sing-alongs. Throw in some synth lines to keep things fresh and baby, you've got a stew going.