#and I’ve just been thinking ab the hard job search and how all my friends have been saying the same thing and I wrote this idk
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littlemisslipbalm · 1 year ago
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Please, just give me a seat at the table, I don’t know how much longer this restaurant will stay open.
The continuing story of a recent graduate born in 2001:
Didn’t know I’d be begging for a seat at the table. Was told to wait patiently for my turn and I’d be next in line. Now it seems the line has disappeared or maybe so many lines formed it’s just a massive hoard of people surrounding this one tiny table that no one will get up from. Or if they do, it’s to slide someone close to them in to fill their place, maybe even add a little extension but just for their special someone. What if you’re nobodies special someone? What are you meant to do? I’ve gotten on my knees and begged, and even on the floor I can’t find a place to fit in. Boots and heels and organic sneakers kick away my fingers and face. I’ve screamed and shouted and asked politely, but I get no reply. I get no reply or the same canned response. An automatic reply. You’re worried about AI stealing jobs? I’m not even sure there’s a job left to steal. But I’ll keep waiting at the edge of the table. Instead of speaking with the diners, scouring my phone for the next OpenTable reservation to open up! Booking may only be done 7 days in advance.
Position: Entry-level
Requirements: 3-5 years of professional experience, 3-5 professional references, an undergraduate degree and a way to bypass the other 437 applicants who already applied (a high up connection within the company will do just fine!).
Pay the job service you’re using to see how your profile compares to other applicants. No money because you have no job and can’t afford to boost your profile? Good luck! We hope your connections get you there.
Have you tried menial jobs instead? There’s actually only a few of those as well and you’re not qualified to work them. No one is willing to train you and it’s a job you’ll hate doing. Pay is abysmal but potentially more than that unpaid internship that never got back to you. Did we mention Tips! Put yourself through the pain, try to work through the restaurant. Get a job bussing the table, cleaning the floor or preparing the food and maybe then you’ll find the connections to finally get a seat. It’s unlikely but hey, there’s no point in not trying. Just keep trying. There’s always tomorrow when someone might decide they no longer would like their seat!
I don’t remember the seat I wanted to fill as a child. I barely remember the seat I wanted to fill when I started college. The only way I know is because I keep repeating it to anyone who will listen. I want to be a writer. Each time I must sound less and less enthusiastic—not because I want it any less but because I’m growing more sure every moment I’ll never succeed. The places I’m trying to fill aren’t writing positions, at least not the type of writing I want, but I’m willing. I’m willing to go where I’m needed, it just seems that nowhere needs me. Nowhere wants me.
I’m still standing at the edge of the table. 18 years since I was first asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. Since I was first told I could be anything. It seems I didn’t know then that it wasn’t that I could choose anything but that I’d have to be able to fit anything.
A better outlook would be to focus on the fact that I’m still standing at all. But I want to do more than stand and watch, I want to sit at the table and contribute my voice. I want the man across the table to hear me and respond. I don’t want to be the child who is better seen and not heard anymore.
Please, just give me a seat at the table, I don’t know how much longer this restaurant will stay open. Everyone’s barely touched their food and no one’s been paying their bills.
- a.p.
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celestitewrites · 2 months ago
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TW: emotional ab*se.
Prologue:
“God I got another rejection. It’s like these people don’t want employees. This world is a joke. How hard is it to get a minimum wage job?” Angelo threw his hat indigently across the room, hitting the television. “Does the world hate me or something?!”
“Maybe you should try and talk to your dad and get a job at his restaurant.” I whispered innocently.
“Why can’t you think for once? All I wanted was support from my girlfriend. Are you seriously going to bring this up again?” His voice bellowed in my head. He grabbed my arm and stared into my eyes. “Why would I do that? What? You think I’m not good enough to find a job on my own? Fucking bitch.” He spat out.
I’ve had enough. Looking deep into his soul I can no longer see the man I’ve once loved. The golden sparks that once shined in his coffee colored eyes have disappeared and his once kind expression that lured me in has morphed into rage.
How did we get to this? My first love, my first everything; changed to pure anxiety and uncertainty. I don’t know him anymore. I thought he was the one, but the one isn’t supposed to make you feel like the gum on the bottom of his shoe inconveniencing him. I will no longer be his target of anger.
“But you need a job. I’m just trying to help you.” I can feel the warmth of my tears streaking down my face. “All I wanted to do was love you… I thought you loved me.”
“I do love you but you make it so impossible.” He takes a deep breath. “Katie I can’t be around someone like you. All my friends tell me I’d be better off without you.”
“Then leave.” I spit out “what’s stopping you? If I’m really that terrible why’re you here?”
His hold on me loosens and his eyebrows drop. “Are you not gonna fight for us? I just told you I love you.”
“Love shouldn’t hurt like this.”
“Baby please, you know I’ve had a bad day, and you have to admit what you said was dumb.” Hr let out a sly laugh to hide his discontent. “Don’t make any harsh decisions.” His expression softened.
“You always have bad days. It’s been like this for months Angelo.”
“What’re you trying to say?”
“I can’t do this anymore.”
It was as if he saw a ghost. I could see the terror creeping into his manner. He was loosing me, his emotional slave.
“Please baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. You know that. You know I wouldn’t hurt you on purpose.” His words become exasperated. “Please promise me you’ll be with me, I can’t live without you.”
I looked deep into his eyes and mustered up the courage I’ve been searching for months. “I can’t.”
“What…. So you’re breaking up with me because I don’t want to work with my dad? Seriously?” The rage filled his face once again.
“You know that’s not why.”
“One day I’m going to be gone. And it’ll be all your fault. I hope you know that.” He hissed between his teeth. “You’re the only person I’ve ever loved… and you see me as a monster. How do you think that feels?”
“You already see me as an idiot. What’s the difference.” I fought off his grip and closed my eyes. My arm stung and my lungs ached. I lost my composure and burst into a mess of tears and snot.
“Don’t go”
“I have to”
“No one will love you like I do.” He sobbed.
“I sure hope so.” I turned and walked away. My steps were heavy but finally after months I had some clarity as to what I wanted. I’d rather die alone than be controlled by rage. All this time I’ve been walking on eggshells, trying to be the perfect girlfriend. But what’s the point of that if it makes you feel worse? At the end of the day love isn’t supposed to be a never ending fight, a puzzle piece that has to be cut and morphed to fit right. As I got closer and closer to the door his cries turned to howls as a desperate act to get me to stay.
“You ruined me and it’s all your fault!”
I grabbed the handle and pushed it. Exposing the cold winter rain. I didn’t dare to look back or engage. I took my first steps out the door, walking away with no regret. This was my new beginning.
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eijishimas · 4 years ago
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midnight snack.
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18+ nsfw content, minors dni. all characters are aged up.
masterlist.
content warnings: oral sex (f!receiving), penetrative sex, unprotected sex (use protection irl pls!), quirk use (electro stimulation), a hint of overstim, & a sprinkle of degradation. f!reader.
notes: all i could think about while writing this was “and they were roommates! ohmygod they were roommates.” also thank u bria ( @rekiri ) & sun ( @kiridarling ) for keeping me sane while writing this, ily both <3
wc: 3.0k
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You rarely got hungry in the middle of the night. You usually went to bed full of food cooked by yourself or ordered takeout by your roommate, Denki. Tonight was different, however. You had been working on a project, one that was taking up far too much of your time due to your incompetent group members causing you to pick up the slack. You had been stressed beyond belief lately because of them. Maybe a small stretch would help clear your mind, you reasoned to yourself internally. While you were at it, a midnight snack wouldn’t be too bad. It would help ease your nerves, even. You stood from your desk, stretching your arms above your head and cracking the joints of your shoulders. Now exiting your room, you threw a glance across the hallway to see the light under your roommate’s door was still on. Of course he was staying up again, when did he not? Probably off playing video games with the guys again.
You yawned, bare feet pattering against the hardwood of your apartment floor on your way to the kitchen. You shivered, wearing only a cropped sweater you had thrifted and a pair of your comfiest shorts. So what if they were a little short on you, they did the job of keeping you comfy while you slept. No one besides Denki saw you in them, mostly because you wore them to bed. Opening the fridge door, you cringed at the harsh lighting hitting you square in the face. You bent over, eyes scanning the bottom shelf for something to pique your interest. Since you figured Denki was in his room, you didn’t bother to bend your knees while you were searching for your snack.
“Uh- I uh, whatcha lookin’ for?” Denki’s voice cracked slightly. What were the odds? Your head whipped up so fast from the fridge, you nearly knocked into the door of it. Your face began to overheat as you saw your roommate standing there in his pyjamas, fighting off his own blush as he looked at you. Had he seen how your shorts rode up your ass, giving the perfect view of the lace black panties you had been wearing that night? Maybe. The answer was most definitely a yes, but he wasn’t going to admit that to you. He really didn’t want to die by your hands.
“I was, well I was grabbing some water,” you fumbled for your words as Denki approached you, moving around the bar counter of your apartment to peer into the fridge himself from behind you. His hair was damp, sticking to his forehead indicating that he had just hopped out of the shower. No kidding, he had used your fruit passion shampoo along with lemon scented body wash again. You felt his hot breath on the back of your neck from how close he was to you, your tongue wetting your lips as you tried to ease your building nerves. You were never so nervous around him, he was your roommate and your best friend. The two of you had always been comfortable around each other.
You stood perfectly still, razor focused on the fruit cup on the top shelf to distract your mind that was buzzing with electricity. He smelled so good. He felt awfully warm. And he was incredibly close to you, so much so that you could hear his own inner monologue if you listened hard enough. You were so caught up in your thoughts that your mind barely registered that his hands were sitting comfortably on your waist. “Hey,” Denki spoke up, “Did you wear that for me?”
Processing his words, there was a tiny heat that began to burn low in your stomach. “I’m sorry?” you squeaked out.
“The black lacy ones. The ones that make me want to eat you out on the counter until you’re screaming. Did you wear those for me?” his voice was low, whispering deliciously into your ear. Sinful thoughts were clouding your mind, your previous intentions of getting a snack now lost to the idea of possibly choking on something else entirely tonight. “Denki—” His hands slipped beneath your shirt, stopping just below your breasts. You were starting to feel something hard poking at the cheek of your ass. Your breath hitched, thighs clenching together in an attempt to tame the growing heat between them. The two of you had been dancing around the notion of having feelings for each other for a long time.
You tried to look the other way every time he would stare at you for just a small bit longer than he should. He pretended to not notice the way you sat so very close to him, despite the entire couch being free. The way your fingertips brushed his thighs when you leaned over him to grab the remote. The way his touch lingered on your hip when he went to pass behind you while you cooked dinner together, his palms warm and jittery. Everything clicked together so perfectly for the two of you, it was beginning to become undeniable and almost comical at this point.
Tonight only made you more desperate for some type of release, since all of the previous tension between the two of you had crescendoed into Denki moulding his lips to your neck and sucking deep purple marks in a lovely pattern against your hot skin. Your legs felt weak, a strained moan escaping you. Between the cool air of the open fridge and his hands exploring your torso, it felt like heaven. His fingers pinched and pulled at your nipples eagerly, his name falling off your tongue as if second nature. You wanted him bad. And he wanted nothing more than to strip you of your clothes and have you right there in the kitchen.
Your legs quivered as he touched you, allowing yourself to lean back against him and succumb to his affection. “I’ve been waiting to do this for so long, baby,” the confidence radiating off the blond was dripping right into his tone. It made more of that liquid heat manifest in your lower half. You were quite certain that those lacy black panties Denki had been talking about now had a wet patch from all of his ministrations. His hands kept massaging at your breasts, small whimpers leaving your lips as you whispered out how you needed more from him. You panted, craning your neck to the side to give him more access to your skin. Your hips seemed to move on their own as you wiggled your ass right up against his prominent hard on. “Fuck,” he swore, fingers dipping into your shorts and past the waistline of your underwear to feel your slick. You were soaking from his touches, thighs shaking and fingers finding purchase in blond locks as his finger pad grazed your aching clit. “More,” you whined with need, “I wanna.. I wanna touch you, please.”
Denki’s mind felt like it was melting. Was this a dream? He never wanted to wake up if that was the case. He inserted a finger into your core, heart fluttering upon hearing you moan out for him again. Your walls hugged his single digit, his dick twitching at the sensation. You were feeling unbearably sensitive for some reason that night, the way his thumb drew circles around your clit paired with his finger reaching within you made your head light. “You’re so greedy, look at you fucking yourself on my fingers. Moaning like that for me. From how much you walk around like a little slut, you had this coming,” Denki nibbled at the lobe of your ear before adding a second digit, curling his fingers and further sending you into your pleasure. “Denki,” you called out again, head tossed against his shoulder, ass rubbing right against his dick in ways that made his head spin. “You’re so wet, do you hear that? Holy fuck, I can’t wait to taste you,” Denki’s words made the coil inside the pit of your stomach snap, your first orgasm of the night finally washing over you as you clenched around his fingers. It took all of Denki’s willpower not to cum in his boxers right then and there. Falling against him for support, your hips lazily rolled against his digits to ride out your high.
“Up on the counter babe, we’re not done yet. I’m still feeling a bit hungry,” he murmured into your ear. The two of you backed away from the fridge, leaving the door open to allow some light in the darkened kitchen. You turned to face him, seeing a bit of a loopy smile on his face despite his lust blown pupils. You wasted no time in connecting your lips, tongue sliding into his mouth with ease. Your body pressed his against the cool granite of the counter, his hands drifting lower down your back to meet the flesh of your ass. He tapped your ass a couple times, his fingers pinching at the fabric of your thin shorts. “You won’t be needing these,” he chuckled deeply against your lips. His drop in octave made you shiver. Your own hands mapped out his body, feeling across his abs that he prided himself on as a pro-hero while your other went right for his cock.
Your excited fingers pulled down his gray sweatpants along with his boxers, his cock springing free from its confines. There was a lovely amount of precum beading atop his reddening head, your thumb swirling the natural lube around his tip. The action elicited a groan from the blond, grabbing a bit harder at your ass. You were gentle, teasing even, your eyes glazed over in lust as your hand pumped his dick at a slow tempo. Denki’s hips began to fuck into your hand, his chest heaving as he took this time to shed himself of his t-shirt. He felt entranced by how your fingers looked so delicate fisting his cock, breath hitching in his throat as your wrist rolled with each stroke of his dick. “Do you know how— fuck — how long I’ve waited for this?” Denki’s words are gentle, his neck craning back down to nip at your exposed skin.
“Too long?”
“Way too long.”
You giggled and he groaned, a low rumble against your soft skin that makes you shiver yet again. You smirked with amusement as you felt him pulse in your hand, yet Denki pulled away from your touch just as you were about to tip him over the line to his own orgasm. “You, you first,” he told you, golden eyes trained on yours, “I like seeing you come undone for me.”
A whimper escaped you, his grin hungry with want for you and only you. “Let’s see how good you taste,” he pressed a final kiss to your lips as he eagerly dropped to his knees. With a shy look in your eyes, you allowed your legs to spread, giving Denki a full view of your pretty pussy. He was practically salivating, eyes taking in your wet sex with a strange fire lit behind them. He was eating good tonight. With your fingers threading in his hair and tugging lightly, he took it as his signal to go. You sucked in a gasp of surprise as something cool touched your already slick entrance. Oh, you had forgotten that Denki had a fucking tongue piercing.
Instinctively, your thighs started to close around Denki’s head. He held them open with ease, the metal ball of his piercing following the tip of his tongue as he happily traced your entrance. “Denki,” you huffed, growing frustrated at his languid pace. For a man who seemed rather eager, he was going very slowly. Denki hummed in response, lips now attached to your clit and you felt your body jolt at the feeling. Fuck. Maybe you should have bit your tongue instead. Channeling electricity through his quirk, you felt a shock emitted from the tiny piece of metal in his mouth to your aching clit. “Denki!” you moaned, eyelids fluttering as you struggled to keep your gaze on him. Your hands kept pulling at his semi-damp hair, rutting your hips as best as you could into his face as your heart beat rapidly in your chest. You felt ten times hotter than you did when you first entered the kitchen, your hands expelling your own sleep shirt to the floor as Denki moaned at the sight of your exposed tits. This gave him the opportunity to push his tongue into your pussy, your toes curling at the sensation of his tongue entering your heat. He had his fun, darting his tongue in and out of you as he kept moaning to keep up the tiny vibrations. Moving his bangs away from his eyes, you could only watch as he ate you out with his skilled muscle.
His tongue reached deeper inside of you, his hands holding your thighs apart firmly as they were threatening to clamp around his head with more force. You hadn’t anticipated that Denki would be this fucking good with his mouth. Your inner walls squeezed around him, your moans picking up in volume. Your nipples were peaked, your back arched and your head thrown back as all you could do was continuously grind your hips against his face. This only edged the blond further, his nose stimulating your swollen clit as his tongue delved as far as it could into your dripping cunt. You nearly screamed his name as you were finally tipped over the edge, your chest heaving as Denki suckled at your sensitive lower lips. He drank your essence happily, your body prickling with heat as he drew back to watch in awe at how your pussy fluttered invitingly around nothing. He was drunk on the feeling of you cumming on his mouth. You two were definitely doing that again.
As you steadily regulated your breathing, Denki slowly got up from his position on the floor. Wiping away a bit of your cum from the corner of his mouth, he threw you another grin. You swallowed dryly, “Need you.”
“What was that, baby?”
“Need you, Den. I need you in.. Please.” Your eyes were begging him to give you more. You had seen how much his cock had been leaking onto the kitchen floor, practically throbbing between his legs from not having given release. With a cheeky sort of smile, Denki gave you a kiss to your cheek before settling his lips to the shell of your ear. “Whatever you say, babe.”
In an instant, you were swept off the counter, your body being caged between the closed freezer door and Denki holding you up from beneath your thighs. His cock fell heavy against your stomach, twitching in its desperation for attention. The light emitting from the open door of the fridge illuminated the right half of the electric blond’s face, his expression lustful and giddy in the harsh LED lighting. It made your heart buzz with anticipation, your body tensing as he eased the head of his cock past your folds. Your hands scrambled for his shoulders, fingernails leaving red crescents along his creamy skin. Denki’s eyes were on you, his breathing irregular as you wasted no time in pulling out and thrusting back in with confidence. His lips swallowed your moans, the wet, lewd sounds of your fucking adding more tinder to the heat now coiling in the pit of your stomach for the third time tonight. “Please,” you begged, practically trembling from overstimulation as Denki rocked you into the cool aluminum of the freezer door.
“Please what, baby?” the playfulness in his tone didn’t match the serious manner in which he kept pistoning into you, chasing his own release as your slick from previous orgasms now coated his cock and ran down his thighs. Each time he went in, he angled himself right up to meet that special spot inside you to make you see tiny specks of white dot your vision. “I- I, ah! Denki!” Fingers now grasping at his hair again, you yanked harshly as you came around his pulsing cock for the third and final time, squeezing him snugly as you desperately attempted to catch your breath. There was a tingly sensation running through your legs starting from your thighs, numbing and electric as Denki kept up his quick pace to chase his own release, groaning dirty praises into your ear that made you keen. Your legs wrapped around his waist, urging him to go deeper and finish inside of you. His hips met yours for one last time, stuttering as he pumped his sticky cum into your abused hole. You two stayed there for a moment, you letting out quiet giggles as Denki took his time in getting the air back into his lungs. He let you down steadily from the position you had been in, making sure to hold you up since the feeling was still a bit lost in your legs.
“Wow that was,” Denki paused, struggling to find the right word for the situation you two had caught yourselves in. “Satisfying,” you finished for him, to which he blushed deeply. The smile he flashed you was earnest and relieved, if he was being quite honest. “Ah, nice! Let’s get you something to eat, maybe a cheese string. But definitely water!”
“I’m actually feeling pretty full right now in terms of cheese. Thanks for that, Den.”
“Wait really?” Denki questioned as he swept his boxers along with his shirt off the kitchen floor, his concern showing through his furrowed brow, “Not even for a cheese string?”
A deadpan look crossed your face, sighing as you gave in to your dumbass of a roommate. “One cheese string.”
“Bet!”
Needless to say, post sex activities consisted of a hot shower, the second Shrek movie, and two cheese strings (per Denki’s request). Not a bad way to relieve your stress, you concluded to yourself happily as you snuggled closer to your roommate, fingers intertwined beneath the blanket as you allowed yourself to slip into a comfortable slumber against Denki’s shoulder.
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lemonpeter · 3 years ago
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🧡Day 1: Inc*st🧡
Really starting off strong huh lol anyway, this is very background heavy (I don’t know what happened but now I’m obsessed) and I hope y’all enjoy 🧡
Warnings: inc*st, nff, father/son (but they don’t know), Peter is 18 and an intern at SI, brief substance ab*se mention (and impaired s*x, not between starker)
***
Tony never wanted kids. The thought of someone depending on him in such a way made him feel sick. So he always did all that he could to ensure nothing would happen.
There was always room for accident, though.
***
Tony never wanted kids. The thought of someone depending on him in such a way made him feel sick. So he always did all that he could to ensure nothing would happen.
He never had sex without multiple levels of protection. And he was famous enough that people rarely tried to argue against it. Sleeping with him at all fulfilled what they wanted.
So things were perfectly fine. He never had an issue, he was always completely safe with his partners.
Except for this one night.
He was in a self-destructive episode, in the downward spiral before he hit rock bottom. Mixed every possible substance that shouldn’t have been mixed, impairing him until he wasn’t sure which way was up.
And he had a woman spiraling right along with him.
Her name was…Mary. Mary something. She was a scientist in some field, but he didn’t catch anything else. Or he just didn’t remember it. It didn’t matter anyways, they were both just wanting to ignore what was around them. What their lives had served them.
And maybe he forgot to ask if she was on birth control when he sloppily kissed over her neck.
Maybe he fumbled with the condom to the point where she whispered, “We’ll be fine,” and he believed her.
How it happened didn’t matter. All that mattered was that it did.
Tony didn’t even know.
He didn’t ask for her number the next morning, he just hid out in the bathroom, emptying his stomach of its entire contents while he waited for her to leave.
She was gone by the time he could see straight.
Thank god.
He never heard from her again.
Mary Parker and her husband died six years later and he never knew.
He didn’t know that they had a son. Or she did, at least. There was no way for him to know that the son had been passed along to his aunt and uncle when no other relative was found.
He never knew that Mary Parker had a son. And that her husband wasn’t the one who got her pregnant.
She never crossed his mind again after she left him.
***
Enter Peter.
Tony had new interns come in every year, typically college students that needed the credits, but sometimes someone special would come along.
Peter was a high school senior, but he was one of the smartest people that Tony had ever come across.
Tony had a job lined up for him as soon as he graduated if he wanted it. Not that he’d told him that yet.
He swore that he wasn’t a stalker. He had to prove to Pepper that he wasn’t giving too much attention to one intern over another, and for him that meant that he needed to stay away from Peter personally.
No matter how tempting it was. There had to be a family history of such genius, right? That kind of brains didn’t just occur at random.
But he didn’t look into him at all. He wouldn’t even let himself google search his name.
Oh, but he wanted to. He wanted to know everything there was to know about Peter Parker.
Although maybe he could just do it the old fashioned way. Minimal favoritism involved.
He spent months working with Peter. They became friends. Close friends.
It got to the point where Tony couldn’t help the smile he had when he looked into those warm brown eyes.
He felt it happen, it was official. Peter Parker had his heart.
It didn’t matter how wrong it was, he couldn’t help it. The young man had completely gotten hold of him.
And he hoped that it was mutual.
***
“Peter, can you stay back for a second?” Tony was still standing at the lab table, eyes scanning over the coding that they’d put in place during the session.
Like that was actually what was on his mind.
The young man looked up with wide eyes. Very deer-in-headlights. But it was so cute on him.
“Y-yeah! I actually needed to tell you something, so yes, I can definitely do that.”
Peter sounded a bit nervous which made Tony pause. Maybe his confession could wait a while. Maybe forever. Whatever was on Peter’s mind was infinitely more important to him.
“Okay, you first. I can follow up.” Tony tucked his hands into his pockets, leaning back against the table.
His cheeks burned. “No- no, you can go first. Don’t worry.”
The older man let out a breath. “Peter, you say what you need to. I can wait.”
Peter looked at him, face flushed. He hadn’t really meant to blurt out that he had something to say. He’d thought about it, sure. But he didn’t know-
His brain couldn’t keep up with his body and suddenly he was leaning up, pressing his lips to Tony’s.
The older man froze. It wasn’t what he’d expected at all. But then he relaxed into it, kissing back.
Who knew that they both had the same confession?
But it wasn’t supposed to be happening.
Tony pulled away once he finally got control of his senses again, raking a hand through his hair. “Pete, I’m supposed to be the adult here. I can’t be a good role model if I’m….”
When was he ever a good role model?
“Let me start again. I’m an adult. Kid, I’m old. Old enough to be your dad. And you’re…how old?”
“I turned eighteen in august,” he supplied helpfully.
At least it was legal.
“Eighteen. That’s a thirty year age difference.” Jesus, he was creepy. Falling for an eighteen year old. He couldn’t even buy alcohol for himself.
Peter blinked up at him. “So? I like you, Mr. Stark. I don’t care how old you are.”
Tony sighed softly. “You’re gonna be the death of me. And it’s Tony. If this is what’s happening, call me Tony.”
Even though it had been his plan to confess his feelings anyway, the guilt was still eating at him. He had fallen for a teenager who was just barely legal.
“What is happening, Mr.- Tony?”
Tony leaned in for another kiss, sighing softly. “What do you want to happen, kid?”
“Oh. Well, um, not to be blunt, but- I just- I mean- I really want you.”
He was cute. Innocent. But Tony could tell that what he meant was a bit less innocent.
“Are you sure? You realize this is a bad idea on...a lot of levels, right?”
Peter huffed softly, looking up at him with a stubborn expression. “I don’t care. We can be sneaky.”
Tony snorted. ‘Sneaky’ wasn’t really how he’d describe it, but he had to remind himself that his terms were a lot different than Peter’s. Different generations and all that.
He was horrible.
“Okay, kid. We can take this upstairs-” where there was no one to walk in on them. “-and talk about what exactly you’re thinking.”
“How about we don’t talk about it and we just...do?” Peter gave him a shy, devious smile.
“Uh huh. We’ll see.”
Tony grabbed his wrist gently, glancing in the hallway to make sure that no one was coming before he dragged him to the elevator.
Before he could get another word out, Peter’s lips were on his again. And this time there was more heat behind it.
He kissed back, eyes slipping shut just as the elevator doors did. Their lips pushed together insistently and he felt Peter’s tongue clumsily swiping over his lip.
He suppressed a laugh and parted his lips, allowing Peter to lead.
It was all so curious and clumsy that he wondered just how many times Peter had ever kissed anyone. If any. But that was a question for later.
The elevator dinged softly when they reached the penthouse and only then did they pull away from each other.
Tony led Peter out, instantly heading for his bedroom. Bad idea or no, he’d imagined such a scenario so many times. He didn’t want to waste any time.
“Tony?” Peter spoke up, eyes on the bed. “I know this is really straightforward, but I’m glad you, like, don’t hate me. I’ve thought about this...a lot.”
“You and me both,” the older man murmured. “Something I feel like we should cover before anything else...how far are you wanting to go?”
Peter chewed his lip. “Not to rush things, but I really really want to go all the way.”
“Well, not to rush things, but I want that too.” Tony gave him a small grin. “Do you have a preference?”
“Hmm?”
The confused look that he got made him feel guilty again. Just how much had Peter ever done with anyone else?
“Top or bottom, honey. Receiving or giving, pitching or catching, whatever you want to say. What do you want to do?”
Peter blushed, deciding to distract from the question at hand by pulling his shirt off.
It worked. Tony’s attention was instantly elsewhere, his eyes focused on his trim waist but hard muscle.
“Jesus, kid. That’s...wow.” If he wasn’t hard before, he was definitely getting there from seeing just what his innocent little intern was hiding under loose clothing.
“Like it?” The young man grinned to himself, one hand sensually sliding from the v of his hips up to his chest.
Perfect abs. Round, firm pecs. Jesus, Tony was entranced.
But he remembered what he’d asked. “Peter, top or bottom. What’s your preference?”
“I- I don’t...know.”
There it was.
Tony looked at him, tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip quickly. “You’re a virgin.” It wasn’t a question. He knew it for sure. It wasn’t surprising.
Peter got defensive. “I’ve done some stuff.”
“Uh huh. What ‘stuff’?”
He refused to look at Tony, his eyes on his hands as he played with the button on his jeans. “I’ve given oral. Guys and girls. And I’ve gotten, like, a couple handjobs and blowjobs.”
Tony closed his eyes. “I shouldn’t be your first. This- Peter, this is such a bad idea. You should be with someone your own age.”
Peter made an indignant sound, popping the button on his jeans and unzipping them out of protest. “I don’t want someone my own age. I want you.”
He said it with such finality.
Tony stepped closer to the bed, his hands cupping Peter’s face gently. “You promise me you won’t regret this?”
“There’s nothing that could make me regret this.” Peter unbuckled Tony’s belt, slowly pulling it out of the loops before dropping it to the floor.
Tony nodded slowly, not fighting when Peter pushed his slacks down. It was really happening.
“Holy shit-” Peter’s eyes were wide. His eyes were fixed on the way that Tony’s dick was straining at the front of his tight boxers. There was a nervous look in his eyes.
“Good or bad?” Tony teased a little.
“Good. Good, oh man.” Peter reached down and squeezed himself hard. “So big….”
That was nice to hear. “You think so? Do you think you could take it, sweetheart?”
Peter’s fingers ghosted over the length slowly, making it twitch in its confines. “I...I want to try.”
Tony nodded. “We’ll make it fit. Let’s finish getting you undressed.” He pulled his own shirt off and tossed it to the floor before getting onto the bed next to Peter.
He finished pulling the young man’s zipper down and helped him shimmy out of his jeans. Peter’s thighs were gorgeous, Tony was nearly drooling over them. But he couldn’t get distracted.
“May I?” He met the young man’s eyes, his fingers slipping into the waistband of his boxers.
Peter nodded, breathing hard as he laid back more.
Tony slowly pulled the piece of clothing down, biting his lip when he watched Peter’s cock drop against his hip once it was no longer covered. “So hard for me, honey. Look at that.”
The younger man blushed darker. “I’ve wanted this for a long time, Tony….”
“God, me too. Me too, kid.” He pushed his own boxers off, unable to keep himself from wrapping one hand around himself and stroking slowly.
Peter watched him with wide eyes. “Okay. I want you inside me. Now.” He kicked his boxers away, grinning a little.
Tony laughed softly at his eagerness. “We have to get you ready first. Hold on, let me show you….”
Turns out that Peter was incredibly responsive to everything and by the time he was open enough for further activities Tony had already worked him through an orgasm.
If Peter was that responsive to just his fingers, he couldn’t wait to get his cock in him. And the young man was still raring to go.
Tony grabbed a condom - habit, it wasn’t like they were preventing anything - but Peter stopped him.
“Why can't we just do it…without?” He asked shyly.
“I mean…we can. But you’ll have to clean up and that can be annoying.”
“I want…I want to feel you. Is that okay?” Peter hid his face in his hands, embarrassed by the admission.
Tony nodded, biting back a smile. “Yeah. That’s okay.” He set the foil square down on the nightstand before moving back to the young man.
He got between his legs, hands sliding over the strong thighs he was met with. “You’re absolutely gorgeous, kid. I hope you know that.”
Peter smiled up at him, spreading his legs further. “Thank you, Tony….” He leaned back more, laying his head down. “Now hurry up,” he joked.
Grabbing the lube and slicking himself up, the older man shook his head. “Impatient,” Tony chided, laughing softly. But he was already moving to position his cock at the man’s hole, the tip brushing over him.
They both moaned softly, laughing a little at how in sync they were.
“Fuck me, Tony…please?”
The older man nodded, slowly pushing past the tight muscle with a groan. Even though he’d prepped him, Peter was still tight. Just perfectly so.
Peter was tightly gripping the sheets, popping a couple threads even, with the first movements.
It seemed like his effort was in vain, but he really wanted to try to last.
Tony bottomed out, hips pressed flush against Peter’s ass.
The younger man was whining low in his throat at the feeling. His cock twitched between them. He knew that if he was touched at all before he could calm down a little, everything would be over way before he wanted it to be.
“Need me to stay still?” Tony asked. He could tell that Peter was struggling.
He nodded quickly, squeezing his eyes shut. “Yes. Fuck.”
“Okay, honey. Don’t worry, we can take this at whatever pace you want.”
Peter nodded, trying to get a hold on how he was feeling.
It took him a couple minutes, but eventually he signaled Tony that he was okay. And he could start moving.
So he started slow, but Tony started thrusting when he was given the okay.
Peter moaned, mouth falling open around his noises.
He tightened around Tony’s cock, squeezing down with every movement. Then he cried out when a particularly deep thrust hit something that made him see stars.
“What was that?” Peter gasped, hips rocking up wildly.
Tony groaned, laughing a little through it. “I’m going to, fuck, I’m going to assume that was your prostate. Feels good, doesn’t it? I should have showed that to you when I was fingering you.”
“Do it again!”
The older man snorted, aiming for the same spot again as he picked up his pace. He held one of Peter’s legs, lifting it just enough so that he could get at a deeper angle. “I can try.”
From the increasingly louder noises he received, he assumed he succeeded.
He was so lost in the feeling of Peter that he missed how close to the edge his partner was getting. All that registered was how incredible (borderline painful) it felt when the younger man squeezed around him like that.
Then Peter was crying out louder and thrusting up as he spilled onto his stomach.
Tony swore under his breath. “God, Peter.” He watched him, subconsciously speeding up as he chased his own high.
“Tony!” Peter moaned, eyes squeezed shut as he rode out his high. It was the best orgasm he’d ever experienced, alone or otherwise.
But he slowly opened his eyes, wanting to watch Tony cum.
“I’m close too,” the older man moaned, speeding up again.
Peter moaned louder, feeling himself being pushed up the bed with the quicker pace. “Cum, Tony, please, want you to fill me up.”
He wasn’t so sure about dirty talk, but it could only be but so bad because Tony went still moments later. Peter felt the cock inside him pulse briefly before there was a smooth warmth spreading.
The thing itself felt odd, but thinking about what was happening almost made him cum again.
Actually-
His hand flew to his own dick and he quickly jerked himself off before he was cumming for a third time. It wasn’t nearly as good as the other two, but it was still incredible. Especially thinking about how good Tony still felt inside of him.
He opened his eyes when he heard Tony chuckling. “What?”
“You’re insatiable. And I’m amazed that you can just go again that fast.” The older man closed his eyes again, catching his breath.
He was almost in shock that it had actually happened. He had sex with Peter. After thinking about it for months, dreaming about it, it happened.
He slowly pulled out, laying next to the young man. He knew they were both messes, covered in sweat and cum and lube, but he didn’t care. All he wanted was to hold Peter close before they had to go back to real life.
Tony gently wrapped his arms around him, just gathering him close while he pressed a kiss to the man’s temple.
He found out quickly that Peter’s dazed, relaxed post-sex state would only last for so long.
It was only minutes before the man was talking, whispering about anything and everything. And Tony happily listened.
He hummed softly, holding the younger man close to his chest. One hand gently carded through Peter’s soft curls as they talked quietly.
“My mom met you one time,” Peter murmured. “Before I was born. But she would never tell me about it. Just told me that it happened.”
Tony snorted softly. “Yeah, well, about when would that have been? I had a reputation for a reason.” But the confession started pulling at a memory. It couldn’t quite come to light, though.
“Ew.” The young man grinned at him. “But I guess you’re right. I don’t know, she was kinda weird about a lot of stuff. Not just that.”
“What do you mean?”
Peter sighed softly and Tony frowned. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked. But Peter started answering anyway.
“I don’t know who my actual dad is. She never told me. I vaguely remember her telling me that Richard was the only dad I needed, but nothing else.”
“You would have been so young,” Tony whispered. “Maybe she just figured it could be a conversation for another time.”
“But she wouldn’t tell anyone else. My aunt and uncle knew that Richard wasn’t actually my dad, but they were never told who was. And I guess it just…died with her.”
The older man nodded. “You could always do a paternity test, right?” Why was guilt pooling in his stomach?
Peter shrugged. “That’s assuming that my dad has done one too that we could match. And sometimes….” He trailed off.
“Sometimes what?” Tony kissed him gently, trying to soothe him.
“Sometimes I’m not sure that I want to know,” he confessed.
It made sense. But something was still trying to pull at Tony’s memory. Forming an idea slowly.
Although he wasn’t sure that he wanted to know the answers.
But he couldn’t just leave a question unasked. No matter how dark the potential answer.
“Peter…when did you say that your mom met me?”
The young man snuggled into him more, shaking his head. “I didn’t. I think it was…the year before I was born or so. Why? Do you remember?”
Tony tried to mentally do the numbers. He’d spent most of that year in a fog, but that had been the theme of that era in his life. But maybe…
“Are you okay?”
The older man closed his eyes, frowning as he tried to remember.
Parker. Had he been with a Parker? He couldn’t remember the occasion at all.
Maybe that was for the best.
“Yeah, I’m okay. I’m okay, was just trying to see if I remembered her. I’m sorry.”
Peter leaned up to kiss him gently, shaking his head. “Don’t be sorry. It’s not a big deal, really. Sometimes I just wonder about that stuff.”
Tony tried to assure himself that it wasn’t a big deal.
Maybe it was best to not have all the answers.
He had what he wanted. That was all that mattered.
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anonymousfiction211 · 4 years ago
Note
A smutty oneshot, obviously about Loki. But I was thinking like, the reader has been having wet dreams and dirty thoughts ans Loki can secretly read her mind and he starts to like drop hints here and there and the reader is totally oblivious and then after some pivotal moment they do the nasty.
A/N: Thank you so much. Hope you like it :)
He laid you down on the sofa of his chamber. You moaned as he entered you slowly. Starting at a slow, teasing pace. He increased his pace, building up your orgasm. He grabbed your ankle and placed your leg over his shoulder. He growled as he bit in your ankle. Feeling the vibration through your leg to your core. You closed your eyes, savouring this feeling. The new ankle allowed him to go deeper inside of you, bringing you closer and closer. Your walls clenched around him. He pushed your leg aside and laid on top of you. Swallowing your moans with his own mouth. His tongue slid inside your mouth, circling your own tongue in a sensual kiss. You were almost there, you opened your eyes…
That’s when you saw the ceiling of your own room. You were in your own bed, alone. He wasn’t with you, it was just a dream. You sighed not again you thought. You noticed your increased heartrate, a slight sweat on your forehead and extremely wet underwear. It felt so real. I wished it were. You got out of bed and hopped into a cool shower, cleaning yourself up. You were living in the palace for three months now, because of your father’s job. Leaving you with not much to do. It was an extremely boring time, until you met him. He didn’t pay you much attention in the beginning, but some sort of friendship developed over the last month. What didn’t help was that you were extremely attractive to him. He was tall, with gorgeous green eyes you could drown in, a sharp jawline with high cheekbones and you loved his long black hair. You would expect him to be stoic and cold, but once you got to know him a little bit he was friendly and a bit of a flirt. Well, what do you expect from the God of Mischief?
It the first day of the weekend, so most of the servants and personnel would be gone. Something you had started to appreciate. It gave you a perfect excuse to search some entertainment and Loki always trained on Saturday. Once you put on your dress, you grabbed your book and made your way to the garden. The bench on the right side gave you a perfect view of the training ground. You sat down and started to read your book. Not much time passed before Loki and a guard emerged on the training grounds. When he saw you, he smiled and waved. You smiled back at him, hoping he wouldn’t notice the slight blush on your cheeks. He was wearing a very tight shirt, showing of his muscled chest and abs. What a shame that he trains in a shirt. He and the guard starting with some drills and you went back to ‘reading’ your book. As if you could ever focus with him moving so gracefully across the field. You watched him attacking the guard with his practice sword. You saw the muscles in his large hands holding the hilt ease and tense. God, what those hands could do to me. I bet he could lift me up easily, rip my dress, or hold me wrists together when he keeps kissing me. Teasing me by caressing my thighs, higher and higher…
The sound of your name snapped you out of your thoughts. Loki was standing right in front of you. “I asked if you enjoyed the show?” he smirked. He sat down beside you and took of his shirt. “It sure is hot today.” You did your best to stare forward, but couldn’t help but glance at his chest. “Yeah, you’re really good. How did you get so good?” you asked. “Well, these hands can do anything” he said with a wink. He put his shirt back on and went back to his training. You actually tried to read a chapter of your book, but looked up a lot to glance at Loki. Admiring him for afar, sometimes he noticed, and you would quickly put your nose back in your book. He had worked up a light sweat, making his shirt stick to his skin. As a result, you could see his abbs a lot better. Getting quite hot yourself you decided it would be a good idea to leave.
You got up from the bench and walked back to the palace. Reading the rest of your book in the library. Usually, you were in the library with Loki, both reading. He would be in the chair across from you. Sitting widespread with one hand holding his book and another on his thigh. Licking his lips sometimes and sometimes a finger to turn a page. You got up from your chair to get you favourite book. The book you wanted was a shelf to high. You stood on your toes when you felt him behind you. “Need any help, darling?” he asked in a husky voice. He put a hand on your hip and grabbed the book for you. You turned around, but he didn’t hand you the book. He instead dropped it and pulled you closer. “I’ve been waiting to do this all day” he growled. He pressed his lips against yours. You kissed passionately. He pushed you into the bookcase and grabbed one of your legs. He put it around his waist and pushed his hardened cock forward. You moaned when you felt it. His hand that holds your leg up was traveling higher on your thigh. It got to your ass and he squeezed it hard, making you squeak a little. He broke the kiss “you look so pretty in that dress, it’s been very distracting” he panted. You heard the library door open and were suddenly wide awake. Must have fallen asleep. You didn’t know the person that walked in and decided it was a good idea to go to your own chamber.
In the hallway you encountered Loki. “Any plans for dinner?” he asked you. “Not really” you replied. “Want to join me in my chambers tonight?” It wasn’t the first time he had invited you. The first time you were thrilled. But when you entered his room his brother and his brother’s friends were also there. That really was a disappointment. “Sure, who’s coming?” you asked. He smiled at you “Everyone’s away, it would just be the two of us” you felt your heart flutter and did your best to supress a wide grin. Alone in his chambers, maybe at dessert you spill some chocolate sauce on yourself. Loki would walk towards you and start licking the sauce from your skin… Suddenly you saw a green shimmer. Loki held out your favourite book to you. You looked questioningly at him. “You wanted to read it, right?” “Yeah, ehm.. I just don’t remind me telling anyone that?” He laughed “How else would I know?” You took the book. Alright, weird you thought. He grabbed your hand and kissed the back “See you at dinner”. Luckily, leaving before he could see your blushing.
You got yourself ready for dinner. You were surprised to see Loki had set up a table not far from his bed. His chamber was huge, with multiple rooms. Usually there would be servants plating and serving a large table in his living room. But there was a small round table, with two chairs across from each other. There was cutlery on the table and a candle. The whole thing felt very intimate. Loki immediately got up from his chair and put out the other chair for you. You talked and laughed a lot. Servants were serving several courses, everything was normal. Until Loki said “I’ll get desert myself”. He got back with two bowls of ice cream and a bottle of chocolate sauce. You thought back to your fantasy when Loki invited you to dinner. He put a bowl down for you and went to sit back down.
“I decided on chocolate sauce, since you had such a craving today” he smirked at you. “I didn’t tell you that?” you said unsure. I didn’t right? Or did I? How else would he know? “No, you didn’t” he replied. He started to eat his dessert. You took a spoon yourself, starting to think about it. These weird things happened a lot with Loki lately. He always seemed to know what you wanted. Like the chocolate sauce or your favourite book. But it was more than that he had taken of his shirt and talked about his hands right before you… thought about it. You started to panic, he has magic but to what extent? It’s not like he can actually read my mind right? No, but it would explain a lot… “I can, and darling, your thought and dreams have been very distracting” he suddenly said. You dropped your spoon and looked shocked at him. He knows. He grinned widely back at you.
You shot up from your seat and took a few steps back. Loki got up as well and walked towards you. “H- how long?” you began to stammer. “Long enough” he said with a smug face. He took a few more steps towards you and was standing really close. You started to blush hard, thinking of a way to get out of this situation. Loki put a finger under his chin and made you look up to him. There was a soft expression in his sparkling green eyes, which quickly changed to something more primitive. “Those fantasies of you are really entertaining, but for our first time I want you in my bed” he said huskily. Wait what? First time? Our? You didn’t have time to think anymore, because you felt Loki’s lips against your own. His lips were firm but soft. You closed your eyes and felt his tongue enter you. Swirling around your own tongue in a slow, sensual way. His hands slid down from your shoulders to your hips, pulling you closer to him. Your hands went under his shirt, caressing his chest and abs. You felt his muscles ease and tense under your touch. He broke the kiss, panting a little. “You have no idea what you’ve been doing to me this whole time”.  
His hands grabbed your legs and he lifted you up. Your legs wrapped around his waist. He walked you towards his bed and laid you down. He grabbed the top of your dress and ripped it in half. You gasped as the cool air touched your skin. You only wore underwear and you saw Loki’s eyes widen when he saw your uncovered breast. He took off his shirt and pants and crawled on top of you. He took one breast in his mouth, licking and biting your nipple. His hand was massaging your other breast. His mouth travelled upwards to your neck, playing with your earlobe. His hand was stroking your thighs. You felt yourself become wetter every moment. You started to caress his back, scratching it a little. Loki stopped, he hooked his fingers around your underwear and took them off. He opened your legs and put both of them over his shoulder. He started to kiss the inside of your thighs. Getting closer and closer to your clit. He finally put his tongue on your clit, making you moan his name loud. He started to flick it, giving it long slow licks alternating with hard short ones. When your hands went to his hair it spurred him on. He grabbed your thighs, pulling you closer to his mouth. Your orgasm was building up fast. “Loki… I’m going.. I” you started to moan. “Come for me” he said, the vibration against your clit sending you over the edge. He kept going until your moans were loud breaths and you started to squirm to get away. Silver tongue indeed, you thought.
You saw Loki smirking “I heard that”. He kissed his way upwards towards your mouth, making sure to taste every inch of you. “Turn around, ass up” he whispered. You did as he wanted. A hand started to squeeze your ass. His other hand was on his cock, giving it a few pumps. He teased the tip of his hardened cock at your entrance. “God, please take me” you begged. Loki entered you slowly eliciting a low moan from your lips. He started to pump in and out of you slowly. He felt so good inside of you. Filling you completely, you could feel every inch of you. You heard Loki starting to moan and he picked up the pace. His hand found your hair, he grabbed it and pulled it. You couldn’t help yourself as your moans kept escaping you. Your orgasm building up fast again. Maybe I’m moaning too much? you thought. Loki lowered his upper body to be pressed against your back. “Don’t you dare stop” he growled in your ear. You started to moan his name again, again and again. Loki was going faster and faster, almost reaching his own high. You walls clenched around him and your legs started to shake at the intensity of your second orgasm. Loki pumped a few more times before coming himself. He pulled out and laid exhausted next to you.
You went to the bathroom to clean yourself up. When you came back you saw Loki in his boxers, reading a book on his bed. He had laid out dark green short and a matching top for you. You put the clothes on. He closed his book and put it on the nightstand, meanwhile eying you. He bride smile formed on his face “You look really good in my colours”. You felt yourself blush. A hand snaked around your waist pulling you into the bed. Your back was pressed against his chest and his head was resting right above yours. He holds you close to him. “Out of curiosity, how long have you’ve been reading my thoughts and dreams?” you asked him. He chuckled “Ever since you saw me and thought I was extremely hot.” You thought back at all your fantasies and starting to get nervous. Loki must have sensed you tensing up. He kissed the top of your head “Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who’s been thinking about us. I’m really happy I finally get to hold you” he whispered. You felt him pulling you more closely. It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep.
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creepychan08 · 3 years ago
Text
Aone x reader
Today was your first day with your job as a nurse working at a construction site in Miyagi. Despite boarding the early train, you frowned as you see the crowds of people standing, reminding you of a sardines commercial.
'So hot', you thought, wiping the sweat off your brow.
Your eyes scanned the area hoping for some miracle empty seats. It seems heaven answered your prayers when you see one on the far right.
Its weird though. People should have scrambled for that seat after all no one wants to stand on a crowded train but why is it that it still remain vacant?
Before thinking much further about it, you squeeze your way past the crowd towards the seat and tried to find out why.
Your answer soon came when you see a tall, heavy build man sitting alone beside the empty chair. He had a scowl plastered on his face- or maybe that's just his usual expression? And you see people scooting far away from him as possible.
You felt your heart tug at the scene. Somehow, you wondered how it would feel if you were on the shoes of the man. There is no threatening aura surrounding him anyway, just his intimidating stature.
You made your decision.
"Hi, is this seat available?" You asked, smiling kindly at the stranger. He looked at you, a brief flicker of surprise passed in his eyes. He nodded at your question and you thanked him, before sitting down, glad to finally rest your legs.
"My name is Yn. The train sure is packed today, neh?" You said, making small conversation. The man only grunted in response.
Ah, so he's not much of a talker.
But there's something about him that draws you in. Something that makes you feel the need to just talk and be kind to the stranger.
"Its my first today at work. My first job too so its a bit unnerving for me. What about you? Are you going to work too?"
The man regarded you for a bit before nodding. "Yes. My name is Aone"
Your smile widened even more. He's finally talking!
"Well, Aone-san its nice to meet you!" You enthusiastically bowed towards him while sitting and he does the same. You finally reached your stop and you sighed, knowing that your interaction finally ends here.
"Its my stop. Goodluck on your work!"
You took your things and made your way out the train only to see Aone beside you.
"Oh, is your job nearby too?"
Aone only grunted in reply and you continued chatting with him.
Unknowingly to you, Aone looks at you out the corner of his eyes. His heart feels warm and he felt really glad that someone is not scared of him, even taking the time to converse with his serious persona.
You were really pretty too with your friendly smile and short stature, he thinks with a slight blush on his face.
Soon, you reached the project site where you will be working from today onwards and you blinked confused when Aone stopped right beside you just outside the site.
"Wait, don't tell me this is where you work too?!"
Aone blinked in surprise as well before nodding at you.
A wide grin spreads on your face.
"That's pretty cool! Starting from today, I'll work here as a nurse. So if you need anything just drop by anytime!"
A smile slowly made its way to his lips as he agreed and bid you farewell, both of you in going in separate directions.
Timeskip
It has been a few months after that, and your friendship with Aone grew stronger. You sit with him every morning in the train when your shift coincides and sometimes you both eat lunch together.
You got used to his silent demeanor and accepted him for who he is to which Aone is most certainly grateful for. Whenever you find him distressed, you try your best to help him in whatever you can.
And that goes for you as well. Despite his usual silent and brooding personality, Aone is very perceptive of your emotions. He knows just when you are feeling down and in his own way, tries to cheer you up which in a weird way makes your heart flutter in response.
Your coworkers are constantly teasing you with him but you only laughed it off, thinking you're not pretty enough for him plus you're chubby and really short compared to his height of 6'4.
You saw his abs one time accidentally and you almost had a nosebleed. But then and again that serves to remind you that you were far from perfect to be with him.
You slept with a heavy heart that night.
"Yn-san are you okay?"
You blinked and suddenly were brought back to reality. Aone was sitting in front of you with a concern expression on his face.
"Ah, yes I'm good. Sorry I just spaced out for a while" You laughed in embarassment as you glanced at him. His eyes were intense as he gazed at you and suddenly you felt very hopeless in your attraction towards him.
You knew Aone can never look at you the same way you does to him. Deep inside, you already admits how far you've fallen for the man and for a few months you managed to keep it bottled up inside but you don't know why your emotions are suddenly spilling out of control now.
Aone can never be yours. He will only see you as a friend and maybe you'll just end up pining for him for as long as your heart can take. You wanted him to be yours and for him to claim you as his. But despite your cheery personality, you were very much afraid to confess your feelings.
After all, its better to keep it inside and still have his friendship right? You don't know what to do if you did confess and he ended up rejecting you. Your friendship just might end and you'll forever curse yourself for not keeping your mouth shut.
A finger suddenly wipes your tears and you looked at Aone in shock and confusion.
You're crying..?
"I don't like seeing you cry, Yn-san" Aone confessed, his clear eyes conveying hurt at seeing you in this state.
Your heart twisted at his concern and it takes all of you not to rush in his arms and convey your love for him.
The place had long been vacated by people and it was just the two of you.
Soon, embarassment starts creeping in and you curse at yourself for crying in front of him.
Wiping your face clear of any tears, you were surprised when you felt yourself enclosed in a warm embrace.
A gasp escaped your lips and you gazed upwards to see Aone, looking away with a cute blush on his face as he kept you in his embrace. Your heart started beating hard, you're afraid he can feel it but that concern fades away when he began to speak.
"I.. I don't like seeing you cry Yn-san" He repeated his earlier words then continued, "You're very important to me."
By this time, both your faces had prominent blush as you waited for him to finish.
"I have fallen in love with you for these past months that we spend together. Will you give me a chance to properly continue loving you?"
His hopeful eyes gazed into your own with much sincerity that tears started streaming down your face again. You nodded repeatedly, hiding your face against his chest as you tightened your embrace on him.
"Yes, of course Aone-san. I loved you all this time as well and want to continue loving you in the future. Thank you for giving me this chance."
You gave him a teary smile and he reciprocated before kissing your forehead.
"No, I'm the one who's thankful Yn-san. You made me really happy"
Extended ending~
"Now that we're in a relationship, you can call me by my name. No need for honorifics~" You suggested, grinning at the tall man.
"Very well.. Yn" He looked away with a blush as you cheered.
"That sounds better, darling~" You teased, giggling when he turned cherry red.
You happily grin, looking forward to creating more memories with him.
End
Author's note:
Sorry for the long update. I've been busy so much. Anyways lately I've been fangirling over Aone I mean he's so huge and may look scary but is just a big teddy bear.
I read once that his current concern is that no one wants to sit beside him in a train because of his scary appearance and my heart just went awww. I think its best if I write something about him too because I notice he doesn't have much fanfics when I search for it. Hence, the creation of this one!
Anyway, let me know what you think about it! And as always take care!~ :)))
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annecoulmanross · 4 years ago
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Top Ten Historical Figures Done Dirty by The Terror (2018)
So, we all know and love Dave Kajganich and Soo Hugh’s beautiful show, right? Of course. But it’s important to set the historical record straight, especially when there are real people’s life-stories and legacies on the line. 
(NOTE: this list is biased heavily toward upper-class individuals because the historical record does a better job preserving those voices for us. Was the real Cornelius Hickey as nasty a person in real life as he was in the show? Almost certainly not – which is why we’re given “E.C.” as a nod to the fact that we shouldn’t assume these characters represent real historical villains, even when the narrative makes them antagonists; HOWEVER, not everyone in the show was given the same courtesy as the OG “Cornelius Hickey.” Which is why this post exists – to show you the best sides of some people you might not otherwise appreciate for their full humanity. That being said, keep in mind the sources used – and, for instance, who has surviving portraits and who doesn’t.)
Thus, below the cut, I give you this list, (mostly) in order from #10 (honorable mention, only somewhat slandered) to #1 (most hideously maligned) – my list of characters from The Terror who deserved better. 
(Please don’t take this too seriously – I know there are reasons why choices had to be made in order to make this show work on television, and I do very much love the end product. But I also genuinely think it’s a good idea to remember the real people behind these characters, and think critically about how we depict them ourselves.) 
Bottom Tier – The Overlooked Men of the Franklin Expedition
#10. Richard Wall – & – John Diggle
We’re combining these two because they had a lot in common, historically speaking! Both were polar veterans, having served as a Cook (Wall) and an AB-then-Quartermaster (Diggle) on HMS Erebus under the command of Sir James Clark Ross in the Antarctic expedition of 1839-1843. Certainly we do get some good scenes with them in the show, but there was plenty more to explore there – for instance, Captain Ross was apparently so taken with Richard Wall that he hired him on as a private cook after the Antarctic expedition. (One imagines that Sir James may have regretted letting his friends of the Franklin expedition steal Wall out from under him.)
(If you want some more information on Diggle, the brilliant @handfuloftime​ found this excellent article on him – fun facts include the detail that Diggle’s only daughter bore the name Mary Ann Erebus Diggle.) 
#9. John Smart Peddie 
Now, I don’t think we should go as far as the Doctor Who Audio Drama adaptation of the Franklin Expedition, which makes Peddie into Francis Crozier’s oldest friend, someone “almost like a brother” to Crozier (no evidence of ANY prior relationship between the two existed, contrary to whatever the Doctor Who Audio Dramas would have you believe!) but Peddie probably earned his place as chief surgeon, however fond we may all be of the beautiful Alex “Macca” MacDonald, who was, in fact, the Assistant Surgeon, historically speaking. It’s hard to find information about Peddie, but someone should go looking! I want to know about this man! 
(If you want to know more about the historical Alexander MacDonald, there’s a short biographical article on him from Arctic that you can read here.)
#8 James Walter Fairholme
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The only one of the expedition’s lieutenants who doesn’t really get any characterization in the show, which is a travesty! The historical Fairholme (pronounced “Fairem”) was, as they say, a himbo, and the letters that he wrote home to his father are positively precious. He loved the expedition pets (lots of kisses for Neptune!), and he needed two kayaks because he couldn’t fit into just one with his beefy thighs. Fitzjames loaned him a coat when all the Erebus officers had their portraits taken, and then called him a “smart, agreeable companion, and a well informed man,” and Goodsir singled Fairholme out as “very much interested” in the work of naturalist observations. Just a lovely young man who could have gotten some screen time, you know? 
(Also, as @transblanky​ discovered, four separate members of the Fairholme family gave money to Thomas Blanky’s widow when she was struggling financially in the 1850s, making them, combined, the most generous contributor to her subscription.) 
Middle Tier – Franklin’s Men Who Didn’t Deserve That
#7. William Gibson
Alright, I want to talk about how uniquely horrible the show’s William Gibson is: this is a character willing to lie and accuse his partner of sexual assault that didn’t happen. I get there were extenuating circumstances, but if I were a historical figure who died in some famous disaster and someone depicted me doing something like that? Let’s just say I’m deeply offended on the real Gibson’s behalf. 
What do we know about the historical William Gibson? Not much – but we know a little. Gibson’s younger brother served on an overland exploratory venture across Australia in the 1870s… from which he never returned. (God, the Gibson family had the worst luck?) This description of a conversation that young Alf Gibson had with expedition leader Ernest Giles only days before his death is VERY eerie: 
[Gibson] said, “Oh! I had a brother who died with Franklin at the North Pole, and my father had a deal of trouble to get his pay from government.” He seemed in a very jocular vein this morning, which was not often the case, for he was usually rather sulky, sometimes for days together, and he said, “How is it, that in all these exploring expeditions a lot of people go and die?” 
I said, “I don't know, Gibson, how it is, but there are many dangers in exploring, besides accidents and attacks from the natives, that may at any time cause the death of some of the people engaged in it; but I believe want of judgment, or knowledge, or courage in individuals, often brought about their deaths. Death, however, is a thing that must occur to every one sooner or later.” 
To this he replied, “Well, I shouldn't like to die in this part of the country, anyhow.” In this sentiment I quite agreed with him, and the subject dropped.
(From Giles’s Australia Twice Traversed which you can read here) 
Beyond that, one thing we do know is that William Gibson was probably friends with Henry Peglar – they had served on ships together before, and Gibson may possibly have been the poor fellow found cradling the Peglar Papers, according to researcher Glenn Stein. So we might imagine the historical Gibson as a much kinder man than the show’s depiction of him – this was someone who befriended the clever, playful Peglar we all know and love from the transcriptions of his papers, so full of poetry and linguistic jokes. It’s a shame we didn’t get a chance to meet this real Gibson, who actually knew the Henry Peglar whom we love so well.
#6. Stephen Stanley
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Look. There’s that one famous line in James Fitzjames’s letters to the Coninghams about how Stanley went about with his “shirt sleeves tucked up, giving one unpleasant ideas that he would not mind cutting one’s leg off immediately – ‘if not sooner.’” And certainly Harry Goodsir had some mixed opinions of the man, saying was “a would be great man who as I first supposed would not make any effort at work after a time,” and that he “knows nothing whatever about subject & is ignorant enough of all other subjects,” whatever…. that means…. 
But Fitzjames also had some rather nicer things to say about him, that he was “thoroughly good natured and obliging and very attentive to our mess.” Also, the amputation comment? Very likely had a quite positive underlying joke to it – Stanley may not have been much of a naturalist, but he was actually an accomplished anatomist, who won a prize for dissection in 1836, on account of his “bend of the elbow,” which was “a picture of dissection,” according to Henry Lonsdale, who also called Stanley his “facetious friend” and “a fine fellow” (Lonsdale 1870, pg. 159). So, the real Stanley probably was rather droll, but the perpetually cruel Stanley of the show misses some of the real man’s major historical virtues and replaces them with historically unlikely mass-mercy-murder. 
#5. John Irving
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Now we’re getting into the territory of characters who did get some good development, but are missing a bit of historical nuance. As I’m sure many of you know, the historical Irving was indeed very religious, but the flashes of anger (i.e. against Manson) we see from Irving in the show don’t seem terribly consistent with the Irving depicted in this memorial volume, where John seems more like a quiet, bookish, mathematically inclined young man, with a self-deprecating sense of humor and a gentle sweetness. It’s really not at all far off from the version of Irving we see with Kooveyook in the show – I just wish we could have seen more of that side of Irving. 
Top Tier – The Triumvirate of Polar Friends
So, these three DO have many good things to recommend them in the show, but because I’ve done such deep research on them, it can be quite jarring to watch certain scenes in which they behave contrary to their historical personalities, and I find myself pausing when watching the show with friends or family to explain that NO, they wouldn’t do that! 
#4. Sir James Clark Ross
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First thing – we LOVE Richard Sutton. He did a beautiful job with the material given to him. (This is true of all the actors on the list, frankly, but it’s doubly true here.) But that scene at the Admiralty where Sir James tells Lady Franklin “I have many friends on those ships, as you know,” to shut down her argument for search missions? At that time (aka 1847), historically, Sir James Clark Ross was actively campaigning for search missions, planning routes and volunteering his services in command of any vessel the Admiralty even vaguely contemplated sending out. You could see this real-life desperation in Sir James’s morose attention to his whiskey glass in that scene if you’re really trying, but I think the more historically responsible thing would have been to make vividly clear that James Ross risked life and limb, as soon as he possibly could, to try to rescue Franklin and Crozier and Blanky, men he’d known and cared about and bitterly missed – and, in the case of Crozier, “truly loved.” 
#3. Sir John Franklin
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The historical Franklin had plenty of flaws – his contributions to British colonial rule certainly harmed no small number of people, and we should question the way that heroic statues of Franklin are some of the only memorials that serve to honor the lives lost on Franklin’s expeditions – especially considering the steep body count of not only Franklin’s final voyage, but his previous missions in Arctic regions as well. (DM me and I’ll scream at you about counter-monuments! Is this a promise or a threat? Who knows!) With that said, most contemporary accounts agree that Sir John Franklin treated his friends, his family, and those within his social orbit with kindness, and his cruelties were systemic, not personal. In this light, the image of Sir John viciously tearing into Francis Crozier’s vulnerabilities in the show feels very off. Though there was certainly some friction over Crozier’s two proposals to Sophia Cracroft, historically speaking, there’s no evidence at all that Sir John discouraged her from marrying Francis – Sophia may have had many reasons of her own (*clears throat meaningfully in a lesbian sort of way*) for not accepting any of the several marriage proposals offered to her (from Crozier as well as from others), and we ought to keep in mind that she remained unmarried all her life. The notion that the real Sir John would have considered Crozier too low-born or too Irish to be part of the Franklin family isn’t grounded in historical fact.
#2. Lady Jane Franklin
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Again disclaimer: the real Lady Franklin left behind a legacy with much to critique. Those who rightfully point out the racism of her treatment of the young indigenous Tasmanian girl Mathinna should be fully heard out. Observations of her own contributions to imperialism are important and valid. Though I tend to see her feud with Dr. John Rae as somewhat understandable – given that Lady Franklin didn’t have the benefit of our hindsight knowing Rae was correct – the levels of prejudice that she enabled and even encouraged in the writing of Charles Dickens when he attempted to discredit Inuit accounts of Franklin’s fate are inarguably deplorable. These things being said, everything noted for Sir John re: Sophia Cracroft goes for Lady Franklin as well – there’s no reason to imagine a scene where Jane would bully Francis Crozier within an inch of his life, seconds after a failed second proposal, when, historically, Lady Franklin felt the situation was so delicate that it required the quiet and compassionate intervention of Sir James Clark Ross, a dearly loved mutual friend to all parties. Tension does not imply aggression; conflict is not abuse. We know this can’t have been an easy experience for the historical Francis Crozier, but the picture is a lot more complicated than what can be shown in one small subplot of a ten-episode television show. Because of this complexity, however, Lady Franklin’s social deftness suffers in the show. (I could also write an entire essay about Jane Franklin’s last shot in the show, at the beginning of Episode 9: The C the C the Open C – TL;DR is that framing is very important, and, at the very last moment, the show reframes Lady Franklin as a mutilated corpse, a speaking mouth without a brain, which is….. a choice.)
And, at number 1, the person done most dirty by The Terror (2018) is….
#1. Charles Frederick “Freddy” Des Voeux 
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Look. I’m biased here because I am fed daily information about the historical Freddy Des Voeux from @frederickdesvoeux​ so I’ve become, I think understandably, a bit attached. 
But this is very plainly the clearest cruelty the show does to a historical figure – the historical Des Voeux was a very young man (only around 20 when the ships set sail) known always as “Frederick or Freddy” to his family, and described by all parties as bright and sweet – Fitzjames said that he was “a most unexceptionable, clever, agreeable, light-hearted, obliging young fellow, and a great favourite of Hodgson’s, which is much in his favour besides,” and described him cheerfully helping to catch specimens for Goodsir. Des Voeux is named “dear” by Captain Osborn in Erasmus Henry Brodie’s 1866 poem on the Franklin Expedition (43) and Leo McClintock reported the young man’s well-known “intelligence, gallantry, and zeal” in his 1869 update to his account of the Franklin Expedition’s fate (xlii). None of this is consistent with Des Voeux’s behaviour in the show, especially in the later episodes. 
To reduce Des Voeux to an easily-detested figure, over whose death one might cheer, is not a kindness – the creation of a narrative where his death is satisfying does damage to the memory of a real person, a barely-more-than-teenager who died in the cold of the Arctic and left behind only scraps of a shirt and a spidery signature in the bottom margin of a fragmentary document. 
Television shows may need their villains, but it’s important to remember that real life isn’t like that. Surely the historical Frederick Des Voeux was most likely not a perfect person, and, as an upper class officer contributing to a British imperial project, he does bear some responsibility for the harm done by the Franklin expedition, but it’s not accurate to assume he was any less worthy of sympathy than the other officers who considered him a friend – those men whom we now venerate, like James Fitzjames. So as far as I’m concerned, Freddy Des Voeux deserves at least as much consideration, care, and compassion from us. 
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blu-joons · 4 years ago
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The Setup ~ Kim Jongin
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Your eyes instantly searched for Kai as you walked into the rehearsal room, his smile was wide as he spotted you, careful to be calm, and not make too big of a deal out of seeing you.
“Took your time,” Baekhyun groaned, the first to take a bag of food from you as you passed them around to them all, leaving Kai’s until last as he cautiously approached your figure.
Your eyes widened as he reached out and his hand brushed over yours, glancing up and shooting him a glare to watch the boys all around you. “Thank you for bringing us food,” he spoke, tilting his head to encourage you to sit down beside him in front of one of the mirrors.
“I couldn’t not bring you food with all the threats you guys sent my way,” you groaned as the rest of the boys laughed. “The last thing I want is Chen coming to my house at three in the morning and waking me up, I’d probably call the police on you if you wanted to try though!”
His head shook quickly, looking away from you as he begun to tuck into the meal you’d bought. Each one of them had their eyes on you and Kai throughout, smiling at the way you interacted with each other and how he’d continuously offer you part of his meal to keep yourself healthy.
“If you eat too much, you’ll lose your abs,” Sehun called out as yet again you declined Kai’s offer. Your eyes looked across at him, shaking your head. “Have you seen his abs recently Y/N? It’s like he’s trying to impress someone with how much he’s working out.”
You could feel a blush beginning to creep onto your face as Kai looked away, silently pleading with him to be quiet. It was hard for you not to smile as they all sat around unassuming, unaware of the fact you knew exactly who it was that he was trying to impress, and what a good job he’d done in doing so.
Beside you, Kai continued to smirk, seeing them all so clueless made him happy, spotting the numerous attempts that they all often made to try and set you both up, unaware it had already happened.
“It’s been a while since we saw you Y/N, anything happened in that time?” Chanyeol then proceeded to ask, offering you a suggestive glance. “Weren’t you going on a date last time we spoke; how did that work out for you?”
“I don’t think he was the right guy for me, but maybe there’s someone else out there.”
All eyes fell on Kai from the boys, this was their time to try and make a move on his behalf, especially now that they knew you were still single, or so they thought.
As their break came to an end, you tidied up all their mess so they could get back to their rehearsal, feeling Lay’s presence following your every move.
“Are you free tonight?” He questioned once you finally stopped to look at him. “A friend of mine has been wanting me to find him a blind date for quite some time, and I think you’d be great for him.”
Your eyes turned away from him momentarily, noticing that Chen had cornered Kai too. You could see his eyes rolling until he turned and met your eyes, straight away the two of you knew what was going on, without a word, nodding your heads before turning away from each other.
You smiled at Lay, “that sounds like a good idea. You text me the details later and I’ll make sure I’m there. Can you tell me anything about him? What about his name?”
“Uh…well, that’s a surprise,” he stuttered.
If you weren’t sure before, you most definitely were sure now, deciding not to push it any further, you agreed to Lay’s blind date, writing down the information he told you, where to meet, and what time.
Once the studio was back to looking a little more presentable, you grabbed your bag and car keys, turning around to face the boys. “I’m going!”
One by one all of the came up and said goodbye, as always, Kai was the last giving you an extra tight squeeze. “I’ll walk you to your car,” he smiled, opening the door for you, and following behind.
All the boys smirked as he walked out, their plan had worked perfectly, high fiving each other.
As soon as you were away from the door you felt his hand grab onto yours, pulling you closely into his body. “I hate to break it to you, but I’ve got a hot date tonight and the new pasta restaurant, so I hope you didn’t have plans for that.”
“Funny, because I also have a blind date there,” you chuckled, feeling his lips press to the top of his head. “I don’t know how they all still don’t know what’s going on.”
“We’re just good actors,” he teased, pushing open the studio door and out into the car park. “They think we’re going on blind dates tonight unaware of who we’re going to see.”
Your eyes rolled, the two of you had always been good at being secretive, especially around the boys, but with all the accidental hints you’d dropped neither of you understood how they were still so gullible to not see what was happening before them.
“I reckon we should go on that date tonight still, it’ll be nice to spend some time together,” he suggested, glancing up at the studio window, “Chen even offered to buy a bottle of something nice.”
An evening with Kai and no distractions did sound nice, it had been a while since the two of you were out in public doing normal couple things. You couldn’t lie, you missed it, but it was part of the deal that came with dating an idol.
“It would be rude not to make the most of it,” you smiled, “but what do we do when they ask how it was? Do we really make them think that was out first date?”
“I think so, see how long we can play them until they realise,” he replied, resting against your side as you leant back on your car, “I reckon we can carry on for a long time yet.”
“They haven’t got a clue.”
Kai nodded, bringing his hand to the side of his face, you felt his lips press to yours, tucking your hair behind your ear, using his back to shield you as best as he could.
You were wary of what was around, but Kai was far too strong for you to be able to put up a fight. “I hope you dress up nicely for this blind date tonight, I heard he likes a woman in a red dress.”
“I guess I’ll have to find my best one.”
His lips pressed to yours one final time, broken away by the sound of someone clearing their throat. You both spun around to see Taemin stood in front of you both. “How long has this been a thing then?”
“This isn’t a thing; you don’t know what you saw.”
His brows raised questionably, “I know exactly what I saw. Do you know how long we’ve all been wanting you to get together, but you’ve been together all along?”
“Just don’t tell the boys, we want to see how long we can keep it a secret.”
“If I keep it a secret, you two definitely owe me a huge favour.”
“Fine,” Kai agreed, “just please don’t let them know. It’s too much fun making them think that we don’t like each other, they’ve even set us up on a date tonight.”
Taemin chuckled, “that was my idea, they said they weren’t going to go along with it! So, are you two really a couple, like officially a couple?”
“We’re officially a couple, together.”
---
Masterlist
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wannabe-fic-writer · 4 years ago
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Natasha Romanoff x Reader : Prove Me Wrong
Summary: She can trust you, even if she doesn’t know it yet.
Warning: 18+ Mental Health, Mentions of Death, Mentions of Violence, Smut
Chapter 7
****** 
You’d stepped outside of being professional. Childishly you began to avoid Natasha, not that it was hard since she was avoiding you as well.
She hadn’t been to a session in two weeks and you hadn’t said anything to her about it. 
All because you’re crushing on her.
Which you really can’t understand. 
What had happened between you two for you to develop these feelings? It couldn’t be your sessions. If that were the case you’d have feelings for the whole damn team. Stronger ones at that because the woman was the furthest from opening up to you. 
On the third Friday as you’re sitting in your office working you realize how hypocritical your actions are.
Your whole time here you’ve been telling everyone to address their feelings. Telling them that letting their emotions in was the first step to coping with them. And here you are blatantly ignoring your feelings and not coping at all.
Taking a page from your own book, you pull out an empty notebook and start writing it down. Everything you can think that brought on your feelings for the woman, minus the fact that she’s drop dead gorgeous. 
By the time your page is full, even the little space outside the red margin, you don’t see how you ignored it.
It’d taken you merely a few weeks to start falling for this woman. Her loyalty, her stubbornness, her intelligence, her sass, her confidence, the way she challenges you, her dry sometimes missable humor, that damn smirk, and those green eyes. 
Even scarier, is looking at the page and realizing that she hadn’t even fully opened up to you. If you’ve already started falling for her over this, obviously, little bit of who she is, you’re for sure to be a goner if you ever learn everything about her. 
Groaning, you slouch down in your chair, the force of your fall pushing the wheels back a little. 
Suddenly you feel the brush of, what feels like, silk across your calf. It’s warm, and despite it’s firmness, it seems to mold around your leg. 
You jump back a little, eyes snapping down to the shadow underneath your desk.
Before you can fully panic though, it moves into the light of your office. Tiny brown eyes stare back into your e/c ones and the small black cat cautiously brushes against your leg again.
Confused as to where it came from, but still finding it adorable, you reach down and run your hand over it’s back. You feel the purr coming from the feline before it actually sounds and the second it does, you relax a little. 
“Where did you come from cutie?” 
It’s head tilts at your question and you nod. 
You pick the little thing up and stand, going in search for where it could’ve come from. Honestly you wouldn’t be surprised if it managed to sneak in here. The team could spot an enemy from yards away but definitely not have noticed the presence of this little cutie.
They hadn’t noticed Goose until the day Carol left. Shocked and confused expressions passed when she picked the cat up. So yeah, this one could’ve easily slipped pass them.
Surprisingly, the source of his presence, makes itself known about halfway down the hall. 
The red head you’d been avidly dodging rounds the corner, a small red collar between her fingers, and a determined look on her face.
A grey cardigan flows out by her legs, opened wide enough for you to see the black stretch pants and green crop top she’s paired with it. 
You hadn’t added ‘Abs’ to the list but you should have.
“Missing something?” You teasingly ask, just barely holding up the black cat in your arms. 
Natasha’s brows raise ever so slightly, the only sign of relief you get. She approaches, collar now gripped in her hands as she keeps her gaze trained on the animal. 
“He snuck into my office, scared me half to death.” You tell her.
“It’s a she. Her name’s Liho.” She speaks and god you hadn’t realized you’d missed her voice. 
You nod, and hold her out to Natasha. The red head takes her, careful not to let your fingers brush under the cat’s belly. 
Biting your lip, you let your eyes wander over everything in the hallway but her. Missing when she finally looks at you, eyes racking over your form, lingering on your face. 
The silence is awkward. While before it had been a little tense but mainly empty. 
You hate it. 
Natasha is just about to turn on her heel and leave when you sigh.
“Can we talk?” God it sounds like you’re about to break up with her. Like something bad had gone down in your relationship when in reality there had barely been one to begin with. 
Her green eyes move to you, looking at your nose instead of your eyes.
“In my office, please?” Begging, nice. 
Silence. 
Just before you can mumble out a never mind, she nods. 
You smile, only a little, and nod. Turning around to head back to where you came from, this time accompanied by the source of your anxiousness and her new feline friend. 
Once in the room, you shut the door, and settle yourself on the edge of the couch. Whether this is a long talk or not you figure it be best you not stand.
Like she use to, Natasha opts out of sitting, instead walking around your office. She’s canvased the room some many times you aren’t even what she could possibly have to really look at anymore.
But she finds something.
“Reasons why I like her?” She’s reading the statement right off the page but her tone is questioning.
She’s unsure what it is but you know. It’s why you internally panic. 
Is it physically possible for your heart to drop? If a doctor checked your body now would they actually find your heart in your stomach? Because it feels like they would. 
Natasha stands over your desk, fingers brushing the inked pages, Liho in her other hand looking on as if she can read it too. 
“Wit. Green eyes. Stubbornness,” she keeps reading,“ gorgeous red hair. That damn smirk.” 
You’re frozen. Like, giving Cap a run for his money, frozen. 
All you had to do was close it. Maybe put it in one of the many fingerprint locked filing cabinets, hell even a drawer. But no. 
“Are these about me?” She looks from the paper to you, green eyes as intimidating as you’d ever seen them.
There has to be a god at play here. Maybe Hera, the goddess of love setting this up knowing something you don’t. Or Loki, the god of mischief playing at what would soon be a good laugh. 
Natasha abandons the notebook, rounding your desk to step just a little closer to you,“ Y/N?” 
“You weren’t supposed to see that. I wasn’t supposed to see that.” You stand, taking barely a step towards her,“ I shouldn’t have written it but I didn’t know how else to make sense of what I’m feeling and I’m sorry.�� 
All over the place, good job. 
Her head raises a little. Not to look down on you but to still herself.“ What are you feeling?” 
“Isn’t that my line?” 
She cracks a smile at your little joke, but those eyes retain the question. 
You sigh,“ if I could explain it the right way I would but, I guess, I think I like you. Which is insane cause it’s not like we actually know each other. It’s not like we’ve spent that kind of time together. Still, here I am, thinking and rethinking and making lists.”
Pushing yourself to stand up, you walk over to your desk. Fingers brush over the words on the paper. You now notice that you wrote so hard it bled through to the other pages. 
“I’m sorry if my honesty is scary. It terrifies me. We barely know each other and here I am saying I like you.” 
Her eyebrow quirks at that. 
“Do you really believe we don’t know each other?” She turns to face you,“ I know I misjudged you but I think I have a good idea of who you are.”
You watch her, suppressing the urge to laugh when she lets Liho down on your desk, the cat walking over to you and pressing itself into your stomach. 
And Natasha watches you.
Is she really about to give in, again? Admit her feelings for you just like that.
You notice her eyes had drifted from yours and you search them for the reason why. When she’d spoken before it was with pure confidence and now her eyes hold insecurities. 
Whatever she’s thinking has made her unsure of what she had meant to say. And makes you all the more curious.
Her thoughts continue to race. Is it worth the risk? Are you worth the risk? 
Taking a deep breath in, she releases it and looks into your eyes again.“ You’re compassionate, smart, patient, annoyingly adorable.” She gives you a small smile,“ and even though I’m sure there’s more to learn,” the insecurity lessens replaced with something else, something stronger,“ I like you for everything I already know.” 
You were able to recover the last time you froze, now though you don’t think you will.
Did she just say she likes you? 
Natasha ‘I want nothing to do with your therapy’ Romanoff likes you?
Carol was right! You should’ve known she was. 
You’ve been avoiding each other for weeks all because you were to tied up in your own head. 
“Now I feel dumb for not telling you before.” 
Once again she’s frowning, head tilted a little.“ Before?”
“At the anniversary dinner. When I danced with Carol she said something about you liking me and I disregarded it because let’s face it I thought you barely tolerated me. It seems I was wrong.”
Slight annoyance passes her expression at the thought of Danvers outing her to you. But she pushes that away to focus on the situation at hand.
The woman moves to lean on your desk,“ I have to apologize for the way I acted towards you when you first arrived and recently as well. You were nothing but kind to me and-”
“You don’t have to. Really. I didn’t expect, well I actually kept myself from expecting anything when I was called in so nothing you did hurt my feelings. And it was much nicer than some of the reactions I’ve received.” A breathy chuckle leaves your lips.“ Besides, I’m assuming it’s water under the bridge?” 
Her eyes narrow,“ is it?” 
With wide eyes, you look at her in panic. 
She smiles amusedly,“ it is. I was just joking. Though, I’d like to make it up to you.”
Biting your lip, you ask,“ how so?”
“A date.”
******
taglist:@username23345 @muffliat-o  @aaron-despair @natasha-danvers​ @wildhoney32 @criminallyhamilton @fayhar @nat-km-mh @chicken-wang09
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just-a-8th-dreamer · 5 years ago
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Mine | Yves
Request :  “ can i request a Yves scenario of both her and reader s/o being so busy that they rarely see each other so they were worried about their relationship but they talked it out and they start making and spending time with each other? angst but then fluffy, thank you!”
Happy 23rd birthday to Miss Ha Sooyoung! 🌺
I tried to write something good but I think I lost myself 😂 Anyway, I hope you’ll enjoy reading It✨
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You and Yves were together for a while now. You had met her during her vacations after Buttefly comeback when she came back in Busan to rest and see her family. You were here to discover the city with your friends and one night, you were on the beach to watch wonderful fireworks because of a festival and It turned out the fireworks exploded in your chest rather than in the sky when you saw the beautiful raven haired girl. She had her eyes shining and the softest smile you’ve ever seen. You were taken aback by her natural beauty and her nice figures. You almost dropped your jaw when she came to you with a bubble tea this night, offering you the drink and talked to you about the sea’s freedom like If you have always known her. She was so caring for a girl she didn’t even know that you were speechless. Plus, because of her physical appearance, you thought she was one of those mean girl you couldn’t stand. But she wasn’t. Because Yves is one of the biggest cream puff in the world. When you asked her name, she answered “Sooyoung” without hesitation and you told yours before tasting the bubble tea she bought you.
“Do you know a group called Loona ?” she had asked during your conversation because you had said you liked the festival’s concert. 
You had started thinking, shaking your head but suddenly putting your hand on her arm with a bright face, like if you had had a revelation.
“This is the group where there is this cute girl who always smile ?” you smiled, almost screaming because you were happy to remember something your friends had shown you. “I know her name.. Oh come on, It sounds like something cute” 
Sooyoung was smiling playfully as you were struggling with your memory and she couldn’t take her eyes of your innocent face in front of her. 
“Come on, I can’t remember her name” you said. “Plus, my friends told me she is always with a tall girl with a name related to the Garden of Eden”
“How does she look ?” she had teased without making it obvious. “I can help you maybe” 
You had shook your head, wanting to find by yourself and took your cellphone.
“I saw her just once on a video and I think she is the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen” you had confessed, laughing a little, searching on your phone. “Well untill now” you had whispered right after.
“So I have a rival” she had tilted her head on the side.
You had blushed in front of her words but had kept your eyes on the screen to hide the fact you enjoyed flirting with her. 
“I found her ! Her name’s Chuu” you smiled with a victorious face. “And the other one is...
Your voice turned off as your eyes were attentively looking to Sooyoung’s face and you felt like the most stupid girl in the world. 
“Yves ?” she had finished your sentence with a grin.
Your jaw had almost dropped as she was containing her amusement and you had bitten your lower lip, feeling totally dumbfounded.
“Well now that I know you find me attractive too, would you mind If I ask for your phone number ?” she had asked with an intense gaze on you. 
_______________________________________________________________
If at first you didn’t know she was an idol, you knew it at this moment. You were sitting on the couch, watching absentmindedly a movie, waiting for your girlfriend to come back home. Since she prepared for Loona’s comeback, she had been really busy, practicing a lot, and on your side you had been focusing on your job. But each time you came in your flat, you were missing every part of her. You were missing her sweet smile when she was listening to you. You were missing her intense gaze when she was looking at you. You missed cooking with her, hugging her behind her back while she was pilling some sweet potatoe from her parent’s farm. You missed her touch, how badly you missed feeling her hands on you or resting your head on her chest. You were missing her jokes, even the bad ones. Because, behind her divine beauty, she was one of the funniest girl you knew. You couldn’t live without her and her absence was destroying your heart everytime you were alone. 
You jumped when you heard the door of your appartment being closed and when your eyes met Sooyoung’s ones, you couldn’t believe she was real. You felt she was even more beautiful than the last time you really saw her. It has been few months she had cut her hair but you couldn’t get used to it. Her shorter hair were giving her a different style and It fit her so well that your eyes were grafted on her. She smiled at you and you couldn’t deny that your heart raced immediatly. She had such power on you, It made you feel so vulnerable when It came to her. She was your strength ans your weakness at the same time, and you were the same for her. 
“Finally” you let out with a half angry, half sad tone.
“I practiced all day, i’m sweating baby” she answered, kissing your forehead. “I’m going to take a shower and then I’ll be all yours”
Your heart melt because of her words but you couldn’t forget your anger because of her absence. She couldn’t take some time for you ? At least maybe few hours ? Even your best friend, Siyeon (who you met thanks to your girlfriend), had tried to see you in her free time even If her group had been busy too. Couldn’t Sooyoung do the same ? 
You shook your head and went to the kitchen, drinking a cup of tea, drowning into your own thoughts. Your girlfriend came back few moments later with her favorite volley-ball shorts and high white socks, her abs uncovered by her shirt. You frowned. Do you want to apologize for something Sooyoung ? you thought. She came closer to you and pulled you against her without a word, holding you tight in a meaningful hug, her wet hair making your shive. But you were cold. Too cold for the warm flame she was. She pulled away, looking at you with her intense gaze, her chocolate eyes in your irises.
“Talk to me” she only said with her legendary relaxed tone, caressing your forearm with her delicate and long fingers.
“Your mother called me about a thousand times” you let out after a long silence because your anger were too strong to keep it inside. “She was worried because you didn’t answer to your phone the last past weeks”
Sooyoung felt surprised but she crossed her arms in front of your words.
“She knows I have to work hard. Plus, she calls you everytime just to talk with you and you perfeclty know that” she answered. “Now, can my girlfriend tell me what’s the true reason of her coldness ?”
She knew you too well and the fact that she could read into you like an open book were satisfying but annoying at the same time. You pinched your lips and you felt your eyes darken.
“I know you are busy with the comeback but I couldn’t see you properly for the last months” you declared, harshly. “Couldn’t you take a little time for your girlfriend just once in a week ?”
Sooyoung was taken aback by your violent tone but your words didn’t surprise her because she felt the same. If she had a true calm temper, when her emotions were controling her, she couldn’t stay still and the fire that was animated you took her too.
“Where were you at night when I came back home just to sleep with you in my arms ?” she replied, her face turning into a stone wall. “You were working late when I was working early. I had to wake up and go when you were taking a shower before going to bed. I am not the only one who focused on my work”
When she was like that, you couldn’t really win the arguement. When she turned into the Chinese wall, you couldn’t really fight her because she was always fair and she would stay strong like a pillar in front of everything. You shook your head and started to go away from her but she suddenly grabbed your wrist.
“How can you be like this ?” you almost screamed. “We barely see eachother ! Even when you cut your hair, I discovered it a week later. Do you think this is a couple’s life ?”
“I didn’t tell you because I wanted It to be a surprise for you. And you’re not the only one who felt alone, Y/n. I was here when you were at work and I started to think that you’d like to spend time with you collegues rather than me” she told you. “I even wondered If you had met someone else once”
You widened your eyes, feeling charged unfairly by your gilfriend and you couldn’t answer something without sarcasm in your voice. 
“Are you saying that I am the one who drove us here ?”
“You knew when you started to date with me that my life was different, that I have to work a lot, sometimes don’t sleep for few days and often travel to shoot music videos” she declared, her eyes in yours, a serious expression on her face. “I told you from the start”
You clenched your teeth and quickly pulled away from her, your anger burning your veins. Her words were like arrows for your heart and you were shoked by her words. Did she mean that you had to stay quiet because she warned you from the beginning of you relationship ? Your girlfriend was impressive, her presence filling every room, especially during an arguement but It seemed she had forgot something.
“Do you want to know something ? I started to date Ha Sooyoung”, you finally said and she widened her eyes. “I fell in love with Sooyoung before knowing Yves. I fell for her because she was all that I want in a girl. She is funny, she is smart, she is caring and she is a little bit shy when the attention is on her. Plus she has an unreal beauty without any makeup. Sometimes I wonder If she has been created in Heaven. But Yves.., well Yves is different.”
She stayed quiet, her expression slowly changing. She tilted her head, letting her arms falling on her sides, already knowing she will be powerless in front of the huge wave that was coming. 
“Yves is confident, about everything. She has a powerful sexy attitude. She knows how to catch people’s attention and keep it on her. She has a very dominant side, making people want to worship her” you continued, clenching your fists. “But she is different from Sooyoung” 
Her heart started to race when she started to believe that you didn’t want to be with her anymore because she had changed or something and she instantly felt anxious, her stone walls falling. She loved you with all her heart, with all the love she could give to someone. She was always talking about you to Chuu, saying that she was the luckiest girl on earth to have a girlfriend like you. She was always annonying Hyejoo, asking her about the new outfit she wanted to buy because she wanted to be perfect for you. She was always spending a lot of time shopping when they were abroad to find you some souvenirs, making her managers worry. You were a part of her and she couldn’t stand the idea of loosing you. She opened her mouth, wanting to say something to show you she was still the same but when she saw tears pearling at your eyes, she changed her mind and listened carefully to the voice she loved the most in the world.
“Sooyoung and Yves are different” you declared, holding back your emotions. “But both are mine”.
Sooyoung’s heart almost exploded in her chest when she heard your words and saw a particular sparkle in your eyes. She then understood. You weren’t fighting, you were opening to her.
“They are mine and you’re a fool to think that I like to share what belongs to me” you let out, feeling finally confident to tell her how you felt. “I miss you everytime you’re gone and I can’t stand your absence anymore. Falling asleep or waking up without your arms around me breaks my heart”
A single tear fell on your cheek while Sooyoung was holding back hers. She shook her head, growling a little because you both starting to fight because of your love for each other and she pulled you in a warm hug that only her can give to you. 
“I am sorry I’ve made you feel abandonned” she only whispered and you felt like It meant everything. “I’m going to take care of my babygirl”
________________________________________________________________
You were walking on the sand, blessed by the sunset and especially by the hand of your girlfriend in yours. After her group’s comeback, Sooyoung had organized a surprise for you and brought you in Busan for vacations. It was your first day and you had spent the entire day with Sooyoung’s parents, happy to have some family dinner with them and to see their smile because they were missing Sooyoung too. When the evening had came, Sooyoung being Sooyoung, she had took you out of the house and brought you to the beach were both of you met and couldn’t deny that your heart melt you realized it.
While the fresh sea reached your feet, giving you a pleasant sensation because of the contrast with the burning sun rays, you couldn’t take your eyes away from the wonderful landscape, your mind full of happiness and relief.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it” Sooyoung said, her eyes on you. “Almost as beautiful as the red fireworks that helped me to see your face the day we met”
She was obvisously flirting, even If you were already together for a long time now. You blushed a little, still not used to her deep voice when she was talking about you and you finally hit her in the shoulder to hide your cheeks. She laughed and went forward, dancing a little on the sand. The sunlight were revealing even more her beauty and you couldn’t help but fall in love for her again. You met her dark irises and her broad smile and you instantly felt your heart flutter. She was enjoying spending time with you more than anything and seeing her like this, free and blissful, made you feel pleased. 
“Come here babygirl” she shout with joy when she came back to you.
Suddenly, she reached for you and lifted you to walk with you on her back, your legs around her waist, both of you laughing. Sooyoung... She was always like this, always playful and always searching to make you smile with her personnality. As If she wasn’t aware of her beauty. The thing is, since the day you started to date her, you always told you that the true beauty was inside her, in her heart. And even If she looked like a goddess, you fell for her divine and good heart. You rested your chin on her shoulder, smiling against her skin and she felt it, quickly pecking your cheek. You shook your head and bit her neck playfully, making her shiver. 
“If you start like this...”she said with a deep voice, stopping her race on the sand to look at you above her shoulder with a grin. 
“Don’t even think about it” you answered and she laughed.
“Too bad, we could have enjoyed the warmth of the sun better” she teased and you hit her shoulder with your fist again. 
You shook your head, sighing but still amused.
“Would you do something for me babygirl ?” she asked with an adorable tone and you couldn’t resist to accept. “Close your eyes”
There was a thing about Sooyoung : never trust her when she was in a playful mood. The second you closed your eyes, you felt her muscled legs starting to move really fast and you suddenly felt something cold on your clothes before being thrown entirely in the water while Sooyoung was diving. When you came back to the surface, Sooyoung was already looking at you with a smile and laughed at your widened eyes.
“I should have never give you my phone number” you pretented to be mad while she was pulling you closer to her, your legs around her waist.
“Do you mean it ?” she raised an eyebrow before biting your lower lip, a meaningful sparkle in her eyes.
“I think I meant that It was the best decision I’ve ever made” you grinned at her. “To date Miss Ha Sooyoung” 
“I agree with you” she replied, holding you in her arms in the water, her loving gaze in yours. “I love you more than anything, future Miss Ha Y/n”
“W-What ? Baby-” you stammered, taken off guard but in a good way.
“No talking” she declared, taking your chin in her hand firmly. “Just kiss me now babygirl”
And with that order, she pressed her lips against yours in one of a passionnate kiss only her can give you to show you how she truly felt for you and you could tell you were the luckiest girl in the world to have this goddess in your life.
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evangelene · 5 years ago
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Despite What You Are (5)
Summary: Vampires don’t feed on blood, they feed on fear. So, why is yours so potent? Why were you saved by the most dangerous of all vampires–Kim Namjoon?
Based on this request:
“Can i ask for a ff where namjoon is a vampire mafia boss and has a spft spot for you. And you get into trouble woth a rival gang and he goes crazy? Fluffy and angsty 🌹”
Thoughts from the bedside
 Part One / Part Two / Part Three / Part Four
It was bright. Sunny, borderline too sunny—the first time you were seeing the outside world since your departure from the world due to a smoky shitpile of a vampire injury. There probably should’ve been more fear associated with the act, but it was real hard to be fearful when Namjoon stood by your side.
Perhaps that moment should have been your first clue to your inevitable fate. But you were dumb, always and forever.
Without thinking, you sunk down to the grass, feeling the heat of the earth seep into your bones. Even when you were at the hunter’s association, the only version of the outside you ever got to see was one covered in barbed, electric wire and asphalt that desperately needed to be replaced.
Nothing really ever lived there; even the weeds were nonexistent--as if even the Earth knew that place smothered everything that tried to survive.
You could feel Namjoon’s eyes on the side of your face as you closed your eyes to the healing power of nature Yeah sure, it was just some fucking grass—but for someone who hadn’t seen nor felt grass in several years, it was heaven. There was even a pathetic little tree within eyesight that looked like the tree of life to an environmentally starved human such as yourself.
“What was it like in the human compound—not the Hunters’, but the one you came from?”
“Mmm.” You didn’t open your eyes because, well, you didn’t want to yet. “It was home. I grew up there; I had parents, friends and a life that actually felt like a life. I went to school and graduated; I had plans to get married and have a steady job. I remember that it was a place that felt safe and felt like it would bring me happiness... It was a place where I could dream. I haven’t dreamt in so long—it was better not to then to be crushed by what couldn’t be.”
Namjoon was silent for a moment, contemplative. “I wonder what my dream was before you. I can’t seem to remember if I even had one.”
“Namjoon!” It was perhaps the most horrifying noise to have ever graced your throat—somewhere between a growl and a shriek that ripped your vocal chords and left dryness at the back of your tongue. However, with the wire wrapping around your waist--threatening to cut off circulation to your desperate, dragging feet--you couldn’t find it in you to care about the pain of your scream. Rather, you let out another.
“Namjoon!”
There were tears coming to your eyes before you could stop them, adrenaline injecting itself into your veins out of frustration. Garlic. It smelled like too much garlic and the metallic tang of blood. If you were in a better state of mind, you would have chuckled about the fact that you finally, finally got rid of the smell of garlic burned into your nostrils from years of soaking weaponry. Before you could scream again, a gloved hand enclosed around your mouth—that motherfucking radio buzzing with static before a voice you desperately didn’t want to hear reverberated through the streets.
Don’t let her escape.
Despite the fact that the blood running through your system turned to ice, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the sight of Namjoon, sandwiched between Taehyung and Yoongi as they looped their arms through his. His screams somehow made it past the rushing in your ears and the silence of your body loosing the majority of its senses.
You hated that you could still hear the sizzle of garlic hitting his skin, the god awful smell permeating your nostrils.
I’ve got a read on your location—I’ll send backup. Make sure she’s alive.
Suddenly, as if you hadn’t been thinking about it every waking second—as if you haven’t been planning on putting your life in the hands of some shoddy medicine to remove it—you remembered the implant the Hunter’s Association had placed within you.
Hey, at least now you knew it was a GPS, right?
Yeah that did absolutely shit nothing to comfort you and before you knew it there was a god awful noise that sounded more feline than humanoid ripping through your chest.
Like a tiny, miniscule insect caught in a widow’s web, you shook and struggled. Every limb flailed fingers and joints digging into every available surface area of the woman holding you hostage. Your hands came up to rip the stupid lens off her face—the fucking bullshit piece of technology that Hunters wore regardless of the time of day. You nearly managed to reach her eye before she jerked her head away, your legs trying to kick out the back of her knee in her distraction. In a final act of desperation, your teeth sunk into the leather of her glove, trying to break flesh.
The wire around your waist cinched tighter around you, digging into your skin as you let out a god-awful shriek. “Fuck off!” But it was muffled through leather and hunter’s fingers.
She’s being unreasonable. Sedate her.
Another hunter approached you, ready to help assist the woman holding you like a wild animal needing to be removed from someone’s home.
“Oh fuck no!” You spat, hoisting your legs up to press square against his chest, shoving with all of your weight to keep him at bay. You couldn’t go down yet. Not yet. Namjoon was hurt. Namjoon needed you and these people would have to do everything in their power to stop you from going to him if they had any hope of keeping you.
Not that you were strong. God you wished you were strong now more than ever.
One of the woman’s hands freed themselves to search through the pack buckled around her hips.
Your mind raced, trying to travel back to hunter’s training, trying to remember what sedatives they had—how quickly they took effect. Would you have time to escape before you went down? Would you make it back to them?
Would you make it back to Namjoon before it was too late?
Too late. Too late for who?
Your eyes scanned the battle wildly, hunters invading the corners of your visions like the black spots you see when you’re about to pass out. Through their backs, you could see Hoseok, Jungkook and Jimin fighting them off in an attempt to get to you. Occasionally, one of them would look up at you and you could see their desperation increase in the power of a hit thrown to a human.
Y/N. I’m well aware that you can hear me.
Your laser focus slid back to the walkie at the female’s hip.
Your whole body froze at the sound of your name, one of your feet propped on the face of the hunter in front of you while your arms shook from the effort of holding back the huntress’ hand armed with a needle--far too close to your skin for comfort.  
I want to personally congratulate you. When you come home, you can expect to see a medal waiting for you in your honor. You brought us directly to Kim Namjoon. You brought down the largest and most powerful clan on the entire continent—you should be proud. Despite your previous disobedience, I will have you know that your slate will be cleaned with this gift to us.
A year ago, the news would have been good to hear for yourself. One less clan? One less powerful ass vampire to threaten your life? Great. Excellent.
But, since the only remaining strand of fear currently inhabiting your body was for Namjoon and his safety, you realized that you were no longer that girl from a year ago. You were no longer afraid of the world outside your walls, you were no longer afraid of all vampires and you sure as hell had no fear for the people that you once were forced to consider comrades.
God, if you could spit in the General’s Assistant’s face, you would have hocked the biggest motherfucking loogie your body could offer.
“And what makes you think I want your useless medal?” You hissed, returning from the depths of your repressed memories to the present moment. With renewed vigor, you clamped your legs around the male hunter’s head. Every ounce of strength you owned went to your core and abs, lip curling as you began the process of crushing the motherfucker’s head. His hands reached up to claw at your thighs, his mouth gasping for breath as the woman’s efforts to save her fellow hunter distracted her from the bigger picture: you. Still using your strength to kill, you discovered the ability to multi-task long enough to snap the needle out of her weakened hand.
One threat down. For now.
Not to say she couldn’t grab another. Not to say you weren’t one more hunter away from being dragged back to the base camp.
Are you choosing their side?
You looked up to meet Hoseok’s gaze, as he was the closest and the most active in trying to get to you. He was the one within earshot; he was the one that was most likely going to bring you back to Namjoon or get hurt trying.  And god did you love him for it.
(Vampires don’t make any sense)
“Yeah, well, humans don’t make much of it either.”
“You’re smart enough to answer that on your own.” You chuckled darkly, adjusting your grip on the man enough to be able to get a better grasp on his skull—the prior position obviously wasn’t working because…well… he was still breathing. The huntress behind you jerked you to the side in an attempt to remove you from the man you were smothering between your legs. However, it was the worst life-saving attempt you’d seen yet, considering you hadn’t let up on your vice grip and you had no intentions to do so.
All it did was snap his neck.
“But yes.” You murmured to his body as his hands slumped off your thighs and the huntress screamed out in rage directly in your ear. “I choose his side.” You slammed your skull back into her face, wincing at the throbbing of your eardrum.
The statement was all it took for Hoseok to take that final burst towards you, any concern for the bullets fired from the guns all around you lost in that moment. Your concern for his safety, however, only increased until you finally saw why he was no longer worried about the garlic soaked threats: Jimin was using the remainder of his strength to aid Hoseok (Small, almost invisible shields no bigger than a dinner plate—ten at max, so, considering Jimin’s weakened state, it was probably like five. The younger had told you about his ability one night when you were far too curious and far too drunk off some wine Jungkook raided for you).
If you had been in a less concerned state of mind, you probably would have noticed that his lips were moving in an attempt to convey a very important message to you. One that you blatantly ignored because one: it was loud as hell currently, and two: you were dumb.
Hoseok growled in frustration at you as you furrowed your brow on him, thrashing in the huntress’ grip whilst you tried (and failed) to read his lips. You would have absolutely bombed any whisper challenge.
It wasn’t until he was practically in front of you that you could finally make out what he was trying to say, and surprise! It wasn’t “Do apes eat chocolate?”
“Y/N! Cover your ears!”
“I think that Hoseok has the worst ability.” Jiwoo said during one of her bouts of oversharing. You two were similar in that aspect. Suddenly, when presented with a genuine friend willing to listen to your endless rambling, you both found silence impossible and filled it to the brim with ADD thoughts. “I mean, not the worst as in, like, useless—but worst as in fatal.” She made a face at the ceiling. “I said that wrong, didn’t I?”
“Yes, Jiwoo.” You, too, chuckled to the ever listening ceiling. “You did, but continue anyways. I really want to know now.”
“Well…like…how do I put this…” She paused. “Okay, well he can alter his vocal chords in a way that can bust the brains of whoever he chooses. It’s like a sonic scream—however it’s all dependent on the tone. He’s perfected the right note to kill humans within his radius. Vampires are another story; he’s been working on that one. Apparently vampiric brains vary too much to make it easy for him.”
In a heated scramble as the woman screamed “STAND DOWN” in your already aching ear, you wrestled your hands free—nearly slapping yourself in the process of trying to keep your brain in your head. You thought that having the precious organ leaking out your ears would not be an attractive or life-sustaining look.
The sound burst through your fingers anyways, shimmying through your ear drums until your head was shaking with the force of Hoseok’s screams. The people around you froze and twisted like they’d been shot, bodies contorting at impossible angles as if they were exploding from the inside out.
In the chaos, Hoseok was able to get close enough to you to slap his hands over yours as added cushion to the hell of his voice. Despite both layers of skin and bone, you still felt blood dribble down from your nose and onto your upper lip. You screwed your eyes shut and clenched your jaw against the dampened noise; god, you did not want to imagine what it would sound like with bare ears.
The huntress behind you finally slumped, the wire around your waist loosening to a puddle at your feet, now that the person holding it was no longer living.
When Hoseok’s hands finally lifted off of yours—it couldn’t have been longer than five seconds, even if it felt like an eternity to your dum hooman brain—your ears were still ringing.
But you were alive.
Which, honestly, was more than you could say for the fallen hunters strewn around you like dead flies.
You didn’t want to look behind you, but curiosity got the better of you and you wound up making eye contact with the woman who had been holding you hostage. Granted, her eyes were darkened and seeing nothing—but that didn’t stop the frozen look of pain on her face as blood leaked from every possible orifice. If you weren’t so preoccupied in your thoughts, you probably would have thrown up. Instead, you just spit the gathered blood in your mouth at the ground, frowning at the radio on her hip.
“If you can hear me, fuck you.” You mumbled, if only because your tongue felt heavy and the world was swaying around you.  You doubted that he could; the words were for your own sanity, for your own control of your life. For Namjoon.
Namjoon.
Namjoon needed you.
You took one swirling look at Hoseok, nodding your thanks because you couldn’t remember how to use your vocal chords. Your first attempt at bolting back towards the compound was thwarted by the fact that your legs were now noodles and the ground was pitched at a drunken angle. Gracefully, you wound up slamming into the busted concrete in a pile of limbs. But, like the stubborn mule you were, determination had you back on your feet and plowing forward before you could even process the fact that you had actually fallen on top of a dead body.
There was a fierce ringing in your ears and every breath you took sounded too loud for the sudden silence of the universe but that one singular thought outweighed every earthly issue.
He chuckled softly. “You are a very interesting human, Y/N.”
Somewhere in the distance, in a faraway parallel universe where your body was but your mind wasn’t, you could feel the pain, exhaustion and agony of moving as fast as you were forcing yourself to. However, it was easily washed out by the pounding of your heart in your chest and the buzz of worry in your brain.
He still had the same smile though.
Bursting through the gates of the compound like a garlic soaked madwoman, you scanned the crowd of equally panicked vampires, failing to note the ones trying to direct you in favor of focusing on the most devastating sound you’d ever heard:
Namjoon’s agonized screams of pain.
Rushing out onto the warehouse floor, you noted that they had haphazardly tossed him onto a table, several vampires holding down his limbs in an attempt to stop him from writhing to the floor. A very unsure and emotionally unstable Taehyung was wiping at his neck in a vain attempt to stop the flow of blood despite his thrashing.
Everything that had been burning hot in your body instantly hit its freezing point, suddenly making you unable to feel your extremities.
Mechanically, as if you knew you couldn’t touch him with your own bloodied, garlic-tainted hands, you ripped off large chunks of your shirt to wrap around them. You stepped towards him slowly, giving yourself enough time to prepare yourself for what you had to do.
However, you, yourself were at a lack of what that might be.
You couldn’t tear your eyes from him—everyone else disappeared around you as if he was the only remaining being on this planet besides yourself. He was sweating with a fever, his skin paling before your eyes.
Vampires don’t get sick.
“Namjoon.” You whispered, completely ignoring the concern of Taehyung by your shoulder. Gingerly, you placed your clothed palms against his chest to get better leverage for you to take a closer look at his wound. Luckily, it appeared that the bullet had just grazed his neck--which would have been fine for him were it a normal bullet. However, since it was garlic laced, the location was perhaps the worst spot in his body to receive such a wound.
Since it was in a place that was directly flowing garlic laden blood to a system that couldn’t handle the substance.
“Namjoon.” You whispered again.
He only let out a huff of breath and a pained grown, his eyes unable to focus on anything in front of him.
Get rid of it, you have to get rid of it. You have to take out the garlic. You have to---
Your hand reached up to cup his face, forcing his gaze to flicker to you.
“Namjoon, look at me please. If you can hear me, please look at me.” Your brow furrowed in determination. “Don’t close your eyes. I need you to stay awake. I need you to look at me. If you—if you close your eyes and I lose you then what was the fucking point of all of this?” You hissed because you wanted to shout but you couldn’t make yourself any louder than you already were.
You didn’t realize you were crying until you watched cool droplets pepper his skin.
Shakily, he freed one hand from the vampires holding him, slowly reaching up to brush away your tears intermingled with blood; his blood or yours, you didn’t know.
You could feel it then, whatever “it” was. You could feel him. You could feel his pain, his fear, his worry. You could feel what he was thinking without being able to process it into words. And, in that moment, you knew you would risk it all for him.
Because….because….
Because I love you.
“Trust me.” You murmured, leaning into his touch before shifting to get a better grasp on him.
Water wouldn’t work, and with a lack of medical knowledge or equipment, there wasn’t a better way to get rid of the poison in his system.
So you did what only a human could do. You leaned down, feeling the heat of his fever radiate a scorching energy across your skin as you got closer to the wound. Swallowing one last free breath, you steeled your nerves and latched your lips around the wound.
You took an experimental bite, gathering as much blood as you could in your mouth before leaning up to spit the garlic laden liquid into the hem of your destroyed shirt. The second time you went in, he jolted against you—his body letting out an awful groan that quickly became a borderline scream. It took every bit of muscle you didn’t have to hold him down and repeat the process.
In that moment, you felt like an honest to god vampire—the ones from the history books; the ones that turned out to be incomparable to the real ones. The ones prior to the War of 2048. The ones that drank blood and lived in the darkness and didn’t understand humans as a source for anything but food.
The ones that wouldn’t be able to grasp your free hand as tightly as the one beneath you.
You continued until you couldn’t taste garlic anymore, until his skin slowly returned to its normal, honeyed color. You continued until the vampires around him could release him because he was no longer shaking uncontrollably. You continued until his sweat broke and the heat of his skin no longer scalded yours, until you couldn’t take the continued taste of his blood—until it became more metallic than sweet.
In a final gasp of breath, you spit the remainder into your soaked shirt, lifting your head to wipe at the smear of blood on your chin.
His eyes bore into your face with a clarity that relieved the majority of your worries.
He still couldn’t move properly, and he still wasn’t fully himself because, naturally, it would take a while for him to gather back his full strength. But what mattered was that he was here now. He was alive and there wasn’t enough garlic remaining in his system to threaten his life.
Taehyung handed you a fresh rag, allowing you to press it against Namjoon’s wound as he coughed. His words were weak, but you were hyper focused on him and could have heard them even if he didn’t make a sound. “This…” He coughed again. “This wasn’t what you wanted.”
Your eyes felt like they were being held open with toothpicks, your body succumbing to exhaustion now that the adrenaline was quickly leaving you behind. Despite it all, you couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle at his worry. “No. This wasn’t what I wanted.”
“I…” He licked his lips. “I’m not what you wanted.”
You brushed his damp hair off of his forehead, continuing to hold pressure to his neck. You couldn’t help the gentle smile you gave him. He was cute.
This vulnerable version of him was cute.
“No.” You murmured. “No you weren’t.”
You could see the smile in his eyes, if only because his face had trouble making any expression other than tired pain. “But you stayed.”
You could have left. You could have let them take you back to the humans.
But you didn’t.
He didn’t have to say it for you to hear it, for you to read it in the features of his face.
You nodded, feeling your heart go rogue against your sternum. “I did.” You chuckled. “I did.”
~.~
You rested your head against the wall of the bathroom, brow furrowed on the ceiling. Every ounce of your energy was zapped into oblivion, leaving you a heaping mess on the floor of the restroom you’d been banished to.
In the wake of their clan leader being injured, you’d been removed from his side to go clean up—however, with the six currently occupied, the other vampires deemed you dangerous (what with your garlic hands) and, unbeknownst to the people who gave a shit about you, you were forced to take care of yourself. That, however, was hard to do when you were a walking injury who found out she could no longer move.
Not like you could blame the vampires though, as far as they were concerned, you were a walking weapon. And, well, they didn’t really understand the human body’s limits—the only people who did were otherwise occupied.
Of course, that didn’t change the slight sting of loneliness in your bones. Honestly, you were spoiled being around people who cared about you for more than the title of your chess piece.
It made you want to continue to be cared about.
Well, it was your fault that you made yourself a garlic bomb during a vampiric battle.
Battle? Were you really part of a battle? Did you seriously live through a battle?
Who the fuck were you now? Some freaking heroine in a dystopian novel?
With a scoff that determined you were no longer going to mope and feel sorry for yourself, you weaseled your way up into a sitting position—albeit with too much effort and a heaving amount of pain that had you wincing and biting your cheek to stop from crying out.
“Okay, Y/N. Next step.” You murmured to yourself, grabbing the edge of your destroyed shirt. “You can do this.” You managed to get the fabric to your shoulders before you forehead broke out into a sheen of sweat and you gasped out a pathetic noise of pain at your aching and bruised muscles. “Okay, girl, maybe you can’t do this.”
It was at that moment, with you pathetically bearing your ruined bra to the universe inside the bathroom walls that the door burst open with absolutely no hint of delicacy.
You honestly couldn’t find it in you to give a shit as you tilted your head up to meet the intruder’s gaze.
Jiwoo’s angered stare met yours, the rage transforming into worry within one millisecond as she caught sight of you pathetically slouched on the tile. You didn’t get a chance to speak or unpack any of her emotions before she was letting out a snarl.
“I’m going to kill them.”
“Who?”  You would have been scared if she didn’t look like she was going to cry. If your arms weren’t dead weight in your lap and if you legs could work you would have hugged her.
“Everyone. The people that did this to you, the vampires that thought you could fix yourself on your own, you for getting into this mess--everyone.” You hadn’t realized she had been holding the door open until she fully stepped inside and let it slam behind her with an earthquake thud.
You only nodded stupidly, your gaze cast down to your hands and the bloody, smelly mess that they had become. “I have garlic on me.”
She crouched down, grabbing the non garlic soaked bit of your shirt to remove it entirely before tossing it into a corner.  You didn’t miss the way her lip curled at it in disgust. “So?” Her voice was soft in comparison to the steel of her features as she crouched down in front of you. “I can’t believe they left you all alone in here. How are you supposed to care for yourself in this state?”
The longer she squatted before you, the longer she assessed the damage done to your body, the deeper the crease between her brows got. It would have been a shame if she gave herself wrinkles, she was pretty.
“What about Yoongi? The others? They need more attention than me—“
“Y/N.” She cut you off grabbing both of your hands despite the grit of her teeth as the garlic sizzled into her skin. If only because you were afraid she would hurt herself further, you let her lift you to your feet so she could help you wash the blood and pasta sauce from your hands.  It was definitely her doing the lifting too; you were more ragdoll than human at the moment. “I won’t let you be alone. Not right now.”
You stared at your feet, letting her take care of you—refusing to meet your own stare in the cracked and dirty mirror above the sink. Who wanted to look at themselves when they knew they were the reason for everything that just happened?  She reached over to the first aid kit that had been tossed in the room with you earlier, frowning at the pathetic array of medical equipment garnered for you. “There’s not even anything to scrub you with.” It seemed her disdain for the vampires that left you in here by yourself was only growing by the second, her anger a ticking time bomb. You felt she didn’t know what else to be—you felt like she felt as helpless as you did.
“Ji, its fine, really—“ But, when you lifted your head you could see her taking her shirt off behind you, dunking the fabric into the sink before you could even form any words. “What are you doing?!”
“I’m taking care of you.” She said simply, grabbing your arm to begin cleaning the stale blood from your skin. “Because you can’t and he can’t and no one else will.”
“I can do it.” You murmured weakly, but if it weren’t for her grasp on you, you would probably have collapsed to the floor; even she could see that. Your eyes followed the path she cleaned, wincing at the pain that came with the archeology of healing. Underneath layers of dirt and blood you both discovered the cuts and bruises—the threatening fractures that had you making pathetic noises in the back of your throat. You discovered the pain that settled into your bones and made you immobile; even you didn’t know just how bad your injuries were. You hadn’t really had the chance to figure it out in the wake of Namjoon.
But the masochistic part of you said that it wasn’t enough pain—you should have more. You should be dead—you should—
“Why?” Jiwoo whispered, her voice hoarse. “Why would you put yourself in danger like this? Namjoon—he could have handled it himself.”
You knew that. A deep-set part of you knew that. As her shirt turned washcloth soothed the heated ache in your back with cold water, you knew that everything you did was in vain. Even sitting there, safe and sound in an abandoned bathroom, you could still hear Namjoon’s screams. You could still hear the buzz of the walkie talkie’s feedback.
You could still smell garlic.
“He could have.” You murmured.
All your fault, Y/N. This is all your fault. If you weren’t so stupid he would have been alive and well and completely fine.
So would that Hunter you were partnered with.              
Jiwoo’s gaze softened on you, her forehead resting against your temple. “If it was Yoongi, I know I would have done that same. But you and I—we are different species, you have to know that. You matter too much, Y/N. What would we do without you?”
You felt tears building in your eyes, that pathetic, fragile spine of yours folding easily to your fear, your blame and your guilt. You were nothing if you weren’t weak-willed, a human afraid of everything.
Especially herself.
“I wanted to keep him safe.” You whispered. “I’m nothing special, just a dumb human. But he’s done all of this for me and I—I-I—“
Jiwoo’s arms were around you before you could think properly, the pain in your bones a punishment you bared with all the grace of gritted teeth and a yelp of pain that you swallowed in your chest. Her hugs were a force to be reckoned with, because they were usually the contact you got when you needed it most.
“You are incredibly special.” Her anger tried to punch through your thick skull like a lobotomy needle, quick, sharp and to the point. “You aren’t special just because Namjoon is your mate, not just because you’re a small, fractional possibility in a sea of normality. You aren’t special because your fear tastes like what I imagine your human sugar tastes like to you. You are special because you are Y/N. There is only one you; no one can replace you.”
“Everyone is replaceable.”
She shook her head. “No. Not everyone is. Not everyone can make Hoseok laugh so loud that he breaks the glass to the oven. Not everyone can make Taehyung distract enough to get lost during missions because he was looking for a game—if only because he now has someone who wants to play with him. Not everyone can make Seokjin smile like we’ve never seen in years. Not everyone can make Jungkook control himself around a human as much as you can; if only because he wants to be your friend so bad that he forces himself to do the impossible. There hasn’t been a single person—vampire or human—to understand me the way you have. Not everyone can stand up to a room full of vampires when it is obvious that they shake at the mere sight of them. Not everyone can dare to shoot a gun at death and still be standing of their own accord. Not everyone can stand in the middle of two species and find peace with what they had always considered their enemy. And for sure, there isn’t another person on this planet that could make Namjoon fight as hard as he is for you. Y/N, there is absolutely no one else like you. If you were not here, we would all suffer.”
At some point, during her speech that could have moved mountains, her thumbs had come up to brush away tears you hadn’t realized had been falling. It was a lot to say you were worth it when this mess was caused by you.
It’s all your fault he’s hurt.
“But I couldn’t save him.” You whispered.
Her hug was unrelenting, her care momentarily forgotten in the wake of your emotional trauma. “You did.”
“But it was my fault that it happened in the first place.”
“It was the Hunter’s Association’s gun, not yours.”
“But—but I am a Hunter.”
She pulled back to asses you, her eyes flitting across your face as if she was trying to figure out if this was truly a person she knew. “Are you?” Her brow furrowed on you. “Have you ever killed a vampire, Y/N? Hell—“ She scoffed. “Have you ever killed anyone?”
“My--my actions caused people to die.”
The trees became made of blood, the petals falling bits of bone that dislodged from the branches. In the shadows you could see clawed hands reaching for you, pitch black eyes boring into yours as it grabbed your wrists and—
Jiwoo lifted your hands to your line of sight. Her hands weren’t clawed; her nails were blunt and normal around your wrists—gentle, even. Her eyes were clear and kind and didn’t whisper death threats in your ear. “These, Y/N. Have these hands ever taken life?”
You stared at her; the force of your nightmare dissipating around you launched you into a state of shock. It was a ghost that had haunted you, a shadow that never removed itself from you—something you could never get rid of.
But in the bathroom, there were no trees and there was no blood but your own.
You still had your guts in your stomach and you heart in your chest.
You shook your head.
She smiled, blinding in the close proximity. “Then you are not a Hunter, you are Y/N, a very special human. My most special human friend, someone I could not live without.”
The tears that fell could have been from the pain and exhaustion, from the relief of thinking you lost Namjoon, from the realization that your life was inextricably changed forever. But, for the first time in forever, you wanted to believe that they came from happiness.
It was funny how a vampire could be more human than humanity itself.
~.~
It was strange, to say the least. An odd feeling to have the roles reversed; like you were in a parallel universe where you were stronger than Kim Namjoon, the clan leader of the century. It didn’t feel right for you to be sitting curled up in the chair while he lay injured and breathing heavily on the bed.  How long ago was it that you woke up to those golden eyes? How long ago was it that you were in that bed while he was in that chair?
How long was it that you realized you didn’t want to be anywhere he wasn’t?
It had taken Jiwoo a tremendous amount of effort to get you upstairs and to the room—despite protests from both her and Taehyung who insisted that you get your own rest in a more comfortable place such as their own plush beds. However, you told them you wanted the chair; you told them that you wanted to see him—that you needed to be there. With pity in their eyes, they obliged if only because, by now, they knew you could be unreasonably stubborn when you wanted to.
It was a painful fold, no matter how you situated yourself in the furniture, you couldn’t get comfortable. Everything felt swollen and injured, threatening to tear your skin at the seams and spill all your metaphorical stuffing to the floor. But you wanted to be there.
It should have been boring, honestly. Sitting there aching and in pain and just staring at him as he slept should have been the epitome of torture. But it wasn’t.  There was something that stilled the panic inside of you just by watching him rest. Despite the way your fingers fiddled at your chest, you felt comfort in watching the rise and fall of his breaths. It didn’t help your nails from scratching at your skin as if you could reach through your own skin and rip out the device to blame for all of this. If you could have, you would have gone back in time and forced him back sooner. You wouldn’t have laid there on the asphalt like a tired heap of a human, you would have remembered about Jisung’s teleporter.
Maybe then this wouldn’t have been your fault.
But no what ifs and no time controlling could transfer this blame. Even the soft words from Jiwoo couldn’t erase the guilt settling in your gut. Nothing could stop the cacophony of sound from reverberating in your skull, bouncing through your brain until all you could hear was the endless repetition of “My fault. It’s my fault.”
Even when you screwed your eyes shut in the hopes that the loss of one sense would erase them all, it couldn’t stop the unbidden image of Namjoon falling as he screamed in pain. Nothing could uninstall that frame of mind you had when you thought that you were going to lose him forever. You were afraid like you hadn’t ever been.
You’d never had a need to be afraid for another person, because you’d never had any people you loved more than yourself.
You didn’t want to be in this world if Namjoon wasn’t; you didn’t want to imagine a life without him in it.
In that moment, your body went lax, a chuckle escaping you as the tears burst past the gaps in your eyelashes. You had to give up to move on. You had to give up because there wasn’t any way you could lie to yourself any longer.
You loved Kim Namjoon. More than you’ve ever loved anyone, more than you think you’d ever love anyone else.
He wouldn’t understand the sentiment, he wouldn’t reciprocate in the way you wanted him to, but it was better to have what you could than nothing at all, right? He cared for you, and that was enough—that had to be enough.
With a heavy sigh, you peeled open your eyes, tilting your head back to the spot where you knew Namjoon would be.
However, you didn’t expect to meet the intensity of his golden gaze in that exact moment. You didn’t expect him to be awake, one eyebrow raised at you as you nearly jumped out of your skin at the sight of an injured man coherent.
“What is so funny?” He murmured, his tone shifting the moment he caught the quick sight flash of a tear kamikaze-ing down your cheek. “Why are your eyes wet?”
You let out a bark of laughter, unable to help the sudden onslaught of fresh tears running wild. “It’s called crying, stupid.”
“But why?”
You loved him. You loved him so much.
Your eyes met his once more and you shook your head, your lips twisting into a sad version of a smile. “I don’t even know anymore.”
Letting your extremely unhelpful answer slide for the moment, his eyes flit across your features to linger heavily on the bruising evident from the blown out collar of your shirt—his piercing stare especially zeroed in on the blood seeping through the fresh bandages on your hands.
You could sense his hatred and anger without him ever uttering the words; you could taste it in the air as it soured on the back of your tongue.  All he had to do was look at you for you to know what he was thinking.
Was it the same for him?
You rested your chin in the palm of your hand in an attempt to hide some of the damage from his probing stare. “I’m fine, honestly. You…” you took in a sharp breath. “You almost weren’t.”
He sunk his head back into the pillow underneath him, however his gaze never wavered from you. “Humans are more fragile than I will ever be—you were also almost not fine.”
“Perhaps. But at least I didn’t have artery exposure to a substance I’m deathly allergic to.” You murmured, raising one eyebrow back at him.
He pursed his lips at you, an ever present crease gathering between his brows. “Touché.”
There was a brief moment where it was just the two of you, meeting each other’s stare. Naturally, you had to be the one to look away first, finding solace in the way your hand curled around the fabric of your jeans. It was easier than trying to decipher what that glimmer in his gaze meant.  
However, this time he was the one to break the silence first. “I’m sorry that I did not tell you what we were going out to do.”
You shrugged. “I want to say its fine, that I am overly emotional about a lot of things for no reason. But it’s not.”
He nodded. “It is not my intention to exclude you from these happenstances; however I value your life over your temporary satisfaction.”
“Will this be a long-term issue?”
“I hope to clear this mess as quickly as possible, as Jisung has decided to make himself far more annoying than initially planned.”
You bit your lip, your fingers kneading into the sore flesh of your thigh through the fabric. “It’s my fault, isn’t it? All of this. You wouldn’t be in this position if it weren’t for me.”
“Y/N, while it is true I may not have been a clan leader if it weren’t for your existence, I would still find myself in a similar predicament. We want to protect our mates.”
“You were born to be a clan leader.”
His eyes sparked with something you couldn’t yet name and you didn’t dwell on it for fear of your thoughts leaking into his. “I appreciate the compliment. I would appreciate it even more if you quit blaming yourself for the results of Jisung’s confrontation. This is not your fault—my injury is not your fault.”
“The tracking device is in me, it is my fault.”
He let out a long-winded sigh. “Is that what this is about? Something that the humans did to you? Do you now blame yourself for their faults as well? What they do to me, what they have done to you, is also not your fault.”
“But—“
“Y/N.” He slowly extended one hand out towards your chair, his fingers long and inviting—they looked like they might be real nice to lace through yours. “Come here.”
You didn’t move despite the fact that there was a tantalizing offer on the table, instead, you swallowed and forced yourself to face him with all of your mouse bravery. “I thought I was going to lose you from this. I thought that this was it, that I wasn’t going to see you alive anymore because of this stupid device. I don’t think I could ever forgive myself if…if…if…”
“If I died?” That damn eyebrow of his was at it again, incredulously raised just to mock you.
You gulped despite the fact that your mouth was dry. “Yes.”
His eyes were warm, warm in the same way that protected you years ago, warm in the way that engulfed you while attacking Jisung, warm in the way that only Kim Namjoon could be. “I won’t be going anywhere anytime soon; death is improbable because I have you.”
You felt your face heat up like a kettle on the stove, slowly seeping up your neck until the tips of your ears were burning. You really didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing you embarrassed, but his words hit too suddenly for you to recover quickly.
“Besides, we now have matching scars.” He gestured to his bandaged and immobile shoulder before going back to offering you that extended hand.
Like the shittiest matching couple’s outfits.
“I would equate it more to couple’s tattoos—I saw those in one of those mating movies.”
You shook your head, too tired to correct his entire being in the moment. “That’s a curse, not a sign of affection—don’t you know those always end horribly?”
He rolled his eyes. “Y/N, will you just take my hand?”
“You need to sleep.” You whispered, despite the fact that your fingers were already reaching out to brush across his.
It took little to no effort for him to snap his hand around yours, ripping you from the sheltered safety of the chair and into his side as if that was the place you belonged. However, you could see a sheen of sweat break out across his skin from the effort exerted to move you like a ragdoll.
“You’re going to hurt yourself further! You’re still healing!” You snapped, though it had no bite with the heat emanating from your tomato cheeks at the close proximity to his face. You were absolutely, 100% sure that he could feel the way your heart jack-hammered against your sternum.
“Well you weren’t making it easy, so I had to do something.” He mumbled like a kicked puppy, wrapping his good arm around your shoulders to keep you pinned to him. “Besides, you’re warm in the way I like. You are a natural healing agent.”
“Stop saying embarrassing stuff!”
“But I like the way it makes your face turn different shades of burnt.”
“You’re lucky I don’t want to hit you because you’re injured!”
But he only laughed, the sound vibrating through your bones. “I am, aren’t I?”
You buried your face into his good shoulder so he could no longer get the satisfaction of flustering you with his being. “Stop watching romance movies—you’re getting cheesy.”
“What’s cheese?”
You groaned, reaching up to cover his eyes with your hand. “Just go to sleep already, would you?”
~.~
“You’re going to have to feed if you’re going to have any hope of getting off of that bed.” Yoongi’s glare was unrelenting; his arms crossed and frown permanently creased into his features. However, it appeared that Namjoon was otherwise distracted, his attention solely focused on you and Seokjin as he assessed your injuries. “Yah! Are you even listening?”
“No.” Both you and Namjoon spoke at the same time, much to your scowl and his shit-eating grin.
“He’s too busy focused on the person who’s been able to walk around and move just fucking fine this past week while he’s still bed-ridden and glued to a mattress.” You grumbled under your breath, wincing as Seokjin slipped a needle under your skin.
“What are you doing?” Namjoon asked instead of answering either you or Yoongi’s retorts.
“I’m giving her something to help with the swelling.” Seokjin murmured. “However, perhaps you should take the advice of your colleague and your mate and focus on yourself in the meantime.” He hit a particularly sore spot, whispering apologies as you pressed your lips into a line to unsuccessfully disguise the grunt of pain.
“I want to know what it is. I want to know how to help her—I don’t want to rely on you for everything.”
Dead puppies dead puppies. Daisies. Dogs. You missed dogs. It’d been a long time since you’d seen a dog.
You focused your ADHD thoughts on literally anything but the fact that you were relying on Seokjin for far more than making you better—you were relying on him for a secret that, if Namjoon were to catch, the two of you would be screwed. Well, maybe not you, but boy would you be pissed if you couldn’t get this fucking thing out of you. And you kinda sorta liked Seokjin enough that you really didn’t want to see him without a head.
“That is a concern for later, Joon. You can’t learn when you’re getting a fever from lack of food.”
It was almost cute how Namjoon pouted at the rejection. It was kind of cute how he wanted to be the one to be by your side always if it wasn’t for the fact that you were a strong independent woman who---
Who were you kidding, it was hella cute. You felt like a romance novel heroine living up the dream with her hot vampiric mate.
Well, if it weren’t for the fact that you weren’t the least bit the heroine that anyone would write about.
“Besides, she’ll be fine. She’s surprisingly durable for a human.”
Namjoon scoffed. “You hadn’t seen her the first time.”
“I can imagine based on the state of the second time.”
“Hey.” You waved your hands in the air like an idiot, smacking Seokjin extra if only because you couldn’t do the same to Namjoon. “I’m still here guys.”
Seokjin only chuckled. “For now. Make another mistake and you might not be. You have to be more careful.”
“Yeah yeah.” You groaned, even though everyone in the room could fully tell that you had absolutely no intention of doing just that as long as Namjoon’s life was on the line. Well, Seokjin especially—what with the time for your plan coming quicker than either of you were properly prepared for.
“So are you going to feed or what?” Yoongi snapped, causing you to hide a burst of laughter behind your hand.
Namjoon glared at the elder. “If you carry me. I am not about to expose her to that.”
So you become a toddler when you are bed-ridden and can’t move.
“I heard that.” He snapped.
“You were meant to.” You chuckled, sticking out your tongue until Seokjin tested your reflexes by slapping his hand against your knee, causing you to let out a quick yelp that had everyone in the room laughing.
~.~
He was basking in the afterglow of his meal, and despite the fact that he probably just killed a human, you couldn’t help the smile on your face. He looked the healthiest he’d been in days; it was amazing what the required nutrients could do to a being.
“Shouldn’t you be scared?” He murmured as you wiped a rag down his face to clean up the blood splattered there. It wasn’t his, that much you knew.
“Probably.” You murmured, tilting his head to the side to gain access to his neck. Somehow he even managed to get it along his collar bones. There was a big part of you that knew you should have thought about the person behind the blood, the person whose fear made this vampire so healthy—the person who’s life had to end for his to continue. But, with no body and your worry otherwise focused on Namjoon’s healing, you felt more like a mother cleaning up a toddler who just shoved their face in chocolate cake. “But there are sacrifices for everything, aren’t there?”
“There are. But am I worth those human lives?”
You wanted to tell him yes, to say that he was far more important than any of those lives—but that was selfish of you and that was your heart talking over your mind. So instead, you remained silent and let the quiet in the air force you to choose your words carefully.
“Did you…did you kill them?”
“I did today.” He murmured, refusing to meet your gaze. “Does that upset you?”
You dried his face with the clean cloth, shrugging. “Not as much as it should. From what I understand, you’re a picky eater.” And it was the honest truth; you were surprisingly okay for it for someone who literally puked the last time she even thought about a dead body.
He snorted, his eyes glued somewhere towards the wall. “I don’t usually.” He whispered, almost as if he was afraid of your answer. “I don’t usually kill them—humans at least. Hunters are different, but the ones that are brought in from the enclaves I don’t like to destroy.”
“You have to keep them around as a food source. Right?”
He shook his head. “No. It’s not that. I just feel…they were left behind by their own people. They were sacrificed for their own kind—it’s not right to me to take what little they have left from them.”
“You pity them?”
“I suppose I do.”
You sat back on your heels, staring at the side of his face if only because he wouldn’t meet you head on. It was one of the rare occasions where it appeared that the most fearsome clan leader in all of the continent seemed afraid himself.
It was quiet, if only because you knew he had more to say—more to get off his chest. So you waited until he turned to face you, to ask you the question burning at the back of his throat.
“Do you hate me for it?”
“For killing?”
He nodded and you couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle. “I have never seen you like this before. What made you show this side of yourself to me?”
“You make me question my entire existence Y/N. I don’t know humans; I don’t understand how they think. I prefer your smile to your face when it lets loose water—“
“When I cry.” You murmured stupidly.
“When you cry, yes. I dread your fear more for your sake than my own.  When I picked you up off the street so long ago and brought you back here, I thought I could handle it if you despised me. But now, I don’t think that I could.”
It took your breath away, how honest he was. He was always honest, albeit grumpy and sometimes irritating. But he could say these things to your face; he never hid his feelings from you—his thoughts and his worries. That was more than you could have said for yourself. How did you come to deserve someone like him when you were so….flawed?
“I don’t hate you for being what you are. I’m not afraid of you for killing.” You rolled your tongue along your teeth, trying to find the right words in the hodgepodge whirlwind running through your mind. “I mean, I don’t want to see you feed. I don’t want to watch you kill because I have the spine of a coward and I would probably be afraid in that moment. But of you? Never. Not anymore. Despite what you are, Kim Namjoon you are my…. My….”
“Mate?” He whispered, his eyes searching your face as if it had the answers to questions he had yet to ask.
You shook your head. “Despite what you are, Kim Namjoon, I am yours.”
You couldn’t say he was yours, you didn’t own him. He was the leader of a clan; he was the property of many peoples. He couldn’t give you all of himself like you could give to him. He couldn’t give you the love you wanted, but you could give him yours. It was the truth, a double edged sword that both healed and hurt you at the same time. But that was what it was like to love someone like Kim Namjoon.
And if that was the most you could have then you would run with it until the end of the world.
He cocked his head at you, still trying to decipher the meaning behind your stance. “You told me you were not property.”
You let your shoulders slump, a horrible groan ripping from your throat as you fought back the redness of your ears with every fiber of your being. “For the love of God, you are the densest fucking vampire ever.”
“I don’t understand.”
You snorted. “I know, but that’s okay for now. For now, you have to get better so you can get that pea brain of yours working properly.”
“Hey!”
You laughed, enjoying the way that your laughter enticed his own.
~.~
“Namjoon?” You murmured to the quiet of the room, carefully watching the even rise and falls of his chest. “You awake?”
It was a whisper, but you knew, if he were conscious, he would hear it. Recovery had been hard on him; it was a slow process that took time and effort. But, you felt that he was just now beginning to get to a place where you could be positive that he would be fine. You needed him to be fine before you did this. You needed him to be fine but immobile—because then he couldn’t stop you. This was prime timing for what you were about to do, for the crazy decision your idiot ass was about to make. You knew if you didn’t gun for it now, you would never get a chance like this again.
When he didn’t respond, you slowly, ever so slowly, shifted towards the edge of bed.
Carefully, watching his every waking breath and move, you peeled yourself from the bed without so much as a squeak from the loudest mattress springs on planet earth.
Padding to the door like a kid trying not to wake their mom after curfew, you gave him one last parting glance over your shoulder. “I’ll be back.” You nodded to him as if he could actually hear you--as if that could still the rapid thumping of your heart in your chest. You swore you could feel the beat in your throat.
It was a lie that you wanted to believe. You didn’t know if you’d be back, you didn’t know what was going to happen in the span of a few hours. Maybe you wouldn’t be, but you had to have hope if you wanted your feet to move out into that hallway.
With the door closed gingerly behind you, you took a moment to stare at the wood. It was imperative that you gained your resolve once more before continuing onward.
This was for him; this was to prevent incidents like this. You didn’t want to be to blame if they humans came again, you didn’t want to be the cause of his death. You were absolutely positive that you wouldn’t be able to handle it all a second time.
Seokjin was already standing outside the door, quietly waiting for you to meet his gaze. You could feel the heat of him by your side. Patient but ready.
You were thankful for him now more than ever.
Without a word, you nodded to him and the two of you set off outside.
~.~
You busied yourself by playing with the scalpel on the table next to you instead of focusing on the bright ring lights, on the metal table under your ass and the button up shirt you wore for easier access to your chest. You tried to not think about the fact that soon your organs would be exposed to the air in the shed--hat soon you would be either dead or better for it. But, well, that pretending was becoming increasingly harder to do.
“You did a real good job cleaning this place up, Jin.”
“I can taste your fear, Y/N. There’s no point in hiding it now.” He murmured, his back turned to you as he thoroughly scrubbed at his hands. “But thank you. I had to make sure it would be a proper place to do this.”
“You even fixed the floorboards—I didn’t figure you one for carpentry.”
He chuckled. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.”
“I suppose.” You could see yourself in the polished metal, how haggard your face was, how your expressions belittled your resolve. “If I really start to get afraid, you won’t kill me, right?” It was a horrible squeak that made you hate your rabbit tendencies all the more.
“I won’t. I have far more restraint at a mere human’s fear.” He chuckled. “Yours included.”
“That’s the first time that ‘mere human’ feels like a comforting phrase coming from a vampire.”
He shot you a glance over his shoulder, his eyebrows knitting together. “We don’t have to do this now, Y/N. We don’t have to do this at all. There are other options—other—“
“No.” You shook your head, setting the scalpel down as Seokjin grabbed a pair of latex gloves he had set by the sink. “We’ve come too far and done too much. We’re doing this.”
“Are you sure?”
“100%” You smiled, though it felt more grimace than smile. It seemed to work for Seokjin, if only because you bet he knew by know that you were stubborn and scared and jumped into things head-on without thinking. If you decided that this was what you were going to do, then he had no power to stop you.
He started towards you, towards the little table he’d procured for his medical supplies. His fingers ghosted over the anesthetic he chose—an oral one, since the last thing he needed was further fear attracting others to you. Needles were a hard pass in a compound full of vampires who could taste fear in the air.
He lifted the prepared cup, handing it over to you.
You, for your part, were surprisingly calm as you started down at the liquid—translucent red, like a punch or a fruity drink. It most definitely was not, but one could pretend.
“Don’t make this be the last time I see your face, okay?” Your voice was weak despite the smile in your statement. “And Namjoon…if he—“
“You’re coming back, Y/N.” Seokjin murmured. “I won’t let you die on this table.”
“I know.” You smiled, heaving out the deepest of sighs from your chest. “I think I just wanted to hear you say it.” You swallowed your own spit, raising your little plastic cup to the air. “Cheers.”
And then it was sliding down your throat, calm and cool and oh-so-fucking terrible tasting. It was like they tried to flavor it with cherry to make it easier but artificial cherry tasted like shit. You remembered when you were seven and your mom bought a bag of cherries from the grocery store to try. You remembered her laugh at your face as you realized the medicine you grew up on was a huge lie to the reality of the sweet fruit.
You didn’t know why you were remembering her now.
You wondered if she still thought of you. If you died, would she ever know?
“It’ll take a few minutes to sink in.” Seokjin murmured, his hands gently pushing you back onto the table. “So relax.”
“Okay.” You whispered more to yourself than to him, shaking off the bitter taste in the back of your throat. “Okay.”
It was silent for a moment. That one quick moment of peace. It was refreshing; it was the calm before a shitstorm large enough to tear you in two.
In the span of a few seconds, the table you were on was suddenly knocked over, sending you careening to the floor in a pile of limbs and confusion. In your out-of-body experience, you could hear Seokjin shouting something that you couldn’t make out. You had to squint to even see him past the sudden, blaring reality that you were on the ground.
Apparently, his shouting was directing you to “for the love of god move!” considering he was landing a punch on a freshly teleported Freckles.
It was horrible and gut-wrenching to know that the reason your head was fuzzy was the due to the anesthetic you could still feel coating your throat and that you had about five minutes before you would be gone to the world.
In the chaos and the crushing realization that you would be of zero help, you found that you couldn’t even make a noise.
“J-Jin!” Your voice was soft to your own disoriented ears as you struggled to your feet. “Jin!” It, unfortunately, wasn’t getting any louder with your increased effort.
“Get out of here, Y/N!”
You frowned, brow furrowed as you took one step, then two lurching ones towards the door—you had to get help. You had to do something for Seokjin, somehow—you had to get someone better than the ticking time bomb that was you.
However, your efforts were thwarted almost instantly by the arm that looped around your waist, yanking you back into the enemy vampire’s chest.
“Oh no you don’t.” Theulgiestvampireever hissed.
You thrashed as much as you could, but your body felt five times heavier than it should have and your attempts amounted to absolutely nothing.
With a forceful kick, Freckles knocked Seokjin backwards and to the ground, blood dripping down both of their foreheads. Seokjin looked up at you through the leaking injury running past his eye, his hand enclosing around your ankle in one last, desperate effort to save you.
“Y/N!”
You couldn’t see Freckles’ evil grin, or the look on his face or the way his leg lifted to deliver a final crushing blow. But you did hear his chuckle next to your ear; you did hear the snap of bone as his heel crashed down onto Seokjin’s hand. You didn’t miss the way Seokjin’s head snapped back dangerously when met by the force of Freckle’s knee.
You screamed even though no sound came out.
I’m sorry Namjoon. You thought before reality shifted around you, breaking you into that nauseating place between worlds. The moment, thankfully, only lasted a few long seconds before you were launched into a heap outside of the fencing of Namjoon’s compound.
You gasped for breath, trying to help yourself to your feet to no avail. Your body was now too heavy for you to move it of your own accord and, when you tilted your head to the night sky, you realized that you couldn’t even feel the asphalt digging into the skin of your palms.
The world blurred around you, despite every effort to keep it in focus.
“Now who’s pathetic?” You hated the sound of his voice, hated that it haunted your nightmares and made you fear for Namjoon’s life. He bent down to your form to pick you up as if you were empty, as if you were nothing more than a slightly weighted bag to sling over his shoulder.
“You ready to meet a god, Y/N?” Jisung chuckled.
You grasped for anything to keep you tethered to your surroundings, fists weakly hitting his back. But, it was useless. It was all so useless. Before you could stop it, you were tumbling into unconsciousness.
~.~
When you finally came to, you had a pounding headache and found that were suddenly unable to move at all.
Well, for one, it was hard to move when your body was still stiff from however long you were out cold. Secondly, it really didn’t help that your arms were twisted behind you and bound by zip ties so tight you felt them cutting off circulation. Your legs didn’t fare any better, considering they were each bound to the front legs of the hard, metal chair you found yourself on.
With a groan to the ceiling, you tilted your head to scan your surroundings and get a better grasp of the reality of the situation you were in. If it weren’t for the fact that your brain wasn’t fully awake, you probably would have split in half from the force of your fear.
The room you were in was dilapidated and fading, however, you came to the conclusion that it was once used for education. Desks were piled in a corner, a broken chalkboard littering the floor to your left with bits of crushed chalk and dust. However, the second you fully awoke, you found that you couldn’t get a good look at much else because your attention was immediately drawn to the table set up next to you. Sitting atop of it was a laptop screen, plugged in via extension cord and a surprisingly quiet generator. Jisung sat smugly next to the laptop, lips twisted in a grin that would put nightmare shadows to shame.
But you were too glued to the sight of Namjoon’s face in the video feed provided by the laptop to care about much else.
He was sitting upright in his bedroom. He must be at the vanity. You thought, stupidly.
He, for obvious reasons, was not as happy to see your face as you were to see his.
“Ah! See that Joonie? Looks like she’s coming to.” Jisung chuckled, hopping off of the desk to take slow, predatory strides towards you. You briefly wondered just how long he had been sitting there, watching you and babbling nonsense to Namjoon.
You were still too groggy to feel too much fear at the action. Rather, you met Namjoon’s gaze through the screen and grimaced.
“Shit.” Was the first, creative, intelligent, and breathtaking thing to come out of your mouth.
“Shit indeed.” Jisung laughed, like a fucking clown from a horror movie you once watched with your best friend back behind the walls of the human world. Before you could react, Jisung’s hand was in your hair, yanking your head back to expose your throat to the coolness of the room.
“Let go of her.” Namjoon growled; the sound was low and scary even to your half-conscious brain. You could see the muscles in his arm flex, his lip curled in a snarl. It would have been attractive were you not in a predicament that had you wanting to shit your pants.
Jisung inhaled, and, even from your awkward angle, you could see the way his eyes glinted with a fresh feed. “Her fear is so fucking good.”
You quickly gathered that this was all just a pissing contest, a power move to bring Namjoon down.  All you would ever be was a pawn, a toy to lure him out. Granted, you, on your own weren’t worth much, but it still sickened you to know that it was about all you would be good for. Vampire or human, it didn’t matter. They just wanted you to kill him—and by gods if you were just going to let it happen.
“Let’s play that game we talked about while she was sleeping, okay Joonie?” The nickname sounded absolutely disgusting coming from Jisung’s mouth. If you could, you would have slapped him yourself (and probably instantly regretted it, but you were always more of a do now think later kind of girl).
“Don’t you fucking dare.”
“What game?” You whispered, your breath hitching as Jisung let go of you far too violently for your own taste, travelling somewhere just behind you. You hated how his eyes glowed from your fear once more, your body shivering at the sudden awareness of the temperature of the room around you.  “Namjoon—what game?” You looked to him for guidance, but his eyes were cold and rimmed with dark circles. How long was he sitting there, watching you sleep through a screen? “Why are you making him watch this?” You whispered.
Jisung, however, did not have the care for his volume as you did for yours. “Because, dear Y/N, there is no point in torture if it doesn’t rile him up. Pictures would have sufficed but, I am a reaction man. I gotta see his face as it happens, live.” By the time he was finished, the last word were hissed into the shell of your ear. Brought with the enemy vampire, was a blade so big it could have covered your whole face. Jisung twisted it, his gaze never leaving Namjoon’s.
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everythingoesnk · 5 years ago
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summary; you come to john’s rescue so he doesn’t fail his test. conversation takes a turn :p
word count; 2 283
warnings; flufliness 🤗🤗
********
On Wednesdays, your older sister was in charge of doing the shopping, but fever had confined her to her bed. By strict orders of your mother, the responsibility was now yours.
That’s why you ran late to meet Mrs Smith and her nephew.
As you stood alone in the hallway, awkward and reluctant, you wished your arrival at 251 Menlon Avenue had been interrupted by the stupidest distraction. Or that you’d have declined to come when you had the opportunity to.
Hearing them arguing upstairs wasn’t what you wanted to do with your evening. Neither was helping John to study for the math test he had the morning after. You couldn’t work miracles, and with this transparency you explained it to your grandma when she compelled you to lend him a hand.
She and Mimi had been good friends for years, and when they were together drinking tea last week, Mimi vented to her how John would distress her in the school field. Music, the young lad was only interested in music. His grades were pitiful, and she found herself running out of stratagems to incite John to get back on track. The guy managed to pass the rest of the subjects, but mathematics were an ordeal for him.
He despised numbers just as he despised having to waste time restricting his Gallotone when he could be rehearsing instead.
“Give me back the guitar, Mimi. Where do you have it?”
“You won’t see it until I hear from the test’s result”
“I’m trying my best!”
“Try harder”
There was a truculent silence that wasn’t a silence per se. They stopped talking, but John’s frantic steps as he paced around the room rummaging around and removing furniture from its place hoping the guitar would be hiding behind were unmistakable.
“It’s not there,” she said, nuisance reflected in her tone, expression inexpressive.
“Unless you ate it it must be somewhere in the house”
Mimi didn’t answer.
“Because it’s in the house, correct?”
Mimi exhaled, giving him a hostile glare. They weren’t in a state where she could throw money around like it was nothing. If she bought him the guitar, it wasn’t to resell it or dispose of it afterwards.
“Of course it is in the house. I’ll return it if you comply with our deal”
After Mimi drew the line, you heard the woman walking down the stairs.
Straightening up, you clasped nervously your fingers around your schoolbag’s strap.
She placed her peculiar hat on top of her hair and covered her figure with a long winter coat. Its corseted structure in the middle cinched in around her already lean frame.
“Do your best” she told you, making sure that she had everything she needed on her. “If you feel like hitting him, you have my permission”
“You’re leaving?”
“I have errands to run”
When Mimi walked over to you, she stopped by your side and looked you up and down.
“The shoes. You dirtied my carpet”
“I’m sorry, Mrs Smith”
You intended to offer cleaning it up yourself until it looked like it did before, but she had other plans.
“When you’re gone I’ll tell John to handle it, the boy lacks discipline. Anyone would think he’s being raised in a jungle rather than a humble home in the northwestern of England and I wouldn’t be able to contradict them”
You had nothing to respond her with, but she didn’t look like she was interested in hearing an answer.
She rekindled her step and marched out the house, half with hurry half slipping away in case John reappeared to keep niggling over how unfair she was.
You’d been in their home previously. Once.
John had been the sergeant who lead the army, devising a prank which sloshed over onto you. Army because his two friends were the ones to set the trap, John keeping his hands clean as the commander and mastermind he thought was. They put a paint bucket on top of the classroom door frame, and the three patiently waited to see who the victim would be.
You spent hours in the shower scraping the tacky liquid off your skin.
That same day, your grandma and you showed up at their doorstep because she wanted him to apologize.
The incident was the reason why you knew where he lived.
You eased down into one of the chairs in the kitchen and dropped your bag onto the table.
John knew you were there, you wouldn’t go searching for him.
Thing is, time went on, and he wouldn’t make an appearance. You checked your wristwatch and cursed. Almost fifteen minutes had ticked by and you were waiting like an idiot for someone who clearly did not care enough.
“Am I dreaming or did I just hear (Y/N) (Y/L/N) saying a bad word?”
You flinched and brought a hand up to your chest.
Looking to the left, you saw him standing barefoot in the doorway with his arms stretched upwards, gripping at the doorframe. Legs crossed at the ankles, a wicked grin curved his lips. He was wearing a white cotton tee and denim trousers that fit him tight in the thighs.
Once recovered from the shock, you shot him a bitter look.
“You’re wasting my time, you know that? The longer you delay it, the worse”
“I’ve had better,” he said, walking over to the sink where two large vertical windows on the wall displayed a perfect view of the back porch.
He closed them, grabbed a plain black sweatshirt that hung from the chair opposite you and put it over his head, messing up even more his already tousled humid hair. It was clear that he had a shower before you showed up. If he hadn’t had, it would be replicating Presley’s.
Until then you didn’t realise that the room was indeed chilly.
“Better what?”
“Better days. Thank you for asking and showing interest” he said, waving vaguely a hand.
He slumped in that same chair and glanced across at you.
“How are you, by the way?”
“Fed up. Tell me what you don’t understand and we’ll practice” you said, pulling out of the schoolbag the book and your pencil case.
John calmly watched you prepare everything. “Geometry, algebraic equations…  The entire book, if you will”
“If that’s the case, I see logic in noting down formulas first, that way you can try and memorize them too” you lifted your gaze and saw him with both hands plunged in the front pocket of his sweatshirt, shoulders relaxed. “Hello? Aren’t you getting something to write on?”
He let silence reign for a moment.
“Out of all the people in class, it had to be you,” he grumbled. You didn’t have a clue about what that was supposed to mean, but now his eyes were piercing into yours to the point where you felt very small very quick. He bounced to his feet with a huff. “I’ll be right back”
Upon his return, he carried with him a notebook with doodlings drawn by him on the cover and a pencil hanging loose between his teeth. Along the way, at some point, he tugged the hood over his face, so now you couldn’t see the top half of it.
He took the seat again and with an unfriendly look began copying the theory.
“If you’d paid attention from the beginning perhaps you wouldn’t be against the clock now”
“I can’t focus if you speak,” he grunted.
“You’re just copying” you said, raising your left eyebrow. “But alright, I’ll shut it”
When he was done, he tossed the pencil and dragged his hands down his face, pulling at the skin under the eyes.
“I hate this” he condemned.
“You hate everything that doesn’t involve music” you clarified, no malice in your statement.
“That’s not true” he scowled, pushing the hood back, actually feeling insulted.
“Alright, tell me something you don’t hate,” you propped your elbows onto the table, laced your fingers and rested your chin there.
“I don’t hate the singing of birds waking me up in the morning, and I don’t hate hanging out with you”
As much as you tried to hide it, John saw how your lips tipped up.
“Am I supposed to feel touched?”
“I’d be really sad if you didn’t. That was smooth”
“Oh wow yes, so smooth, the smoothest” you sneered, taking his notebook to write down a few problems for him to resolve.
“Smoothest” he echoed. “Is that a word?”
“It is” you weren’t sure if he was serious.
“Sounds strange to me, never used it before”
“Venustraphobia sounds awful as well and it’s a real term”
“What does it mean?”
“Fear of attractive women”
“Holy shit, is that true?” he asked, fiddling now with his pencil.
“Yeah”
“So that’s a thing. Does the phobia exist the other way around? Women fearing handsome men?”
“I guess?”
He nodded, amused. “It must be hard for you”
Confused, you raised your eyes and cocked your head with an inquisitive frown.
“Collecting yourself, I mean” he explained, rubbing a hand over his jaw. “You’re doing a terrific job pretending you’re not suffering. As you might know, I’m quite charming myself”
You just stared back for some time, holding back a laugh until it became impossible to restrain.
John was so much fun when he didn’t behave like a dick, you hated to admit, which only happened when his macho friends were around. He was the leader of the group, sure, but it seemed that all he wanted was acceptance from them, to belong somewhere. Pretty much he let them change him. Although when he wasn’t near them, the carefree happy bouncy John you knew returned each time.
Abs burning from laughing, you doubled over as you hugged your abdomen. This bitch, you thought. Your shoulders kept shaking as you tried to subside your chuckles, but you couldn’t stop.
John observed your reaction placidly.
Bright with delight, his eyes gleamed when you kept patting your thigh as a conduit for the laughter.
“My God” you breathed, fanning yourself.
“It’s rude using my name in vain,” he teased, wagging the accusatory finger in your direction.
“You’re far from being God” you retorted, your chuckles fading. You gave him back his notebook. “Enough chitchat. Do these exercises and I’ll correct them”
You waited then, keeping an eye on him as well as inspecting your nails to pass the time.
He raked a hand through his hair and kept it there, closing it in a fist at the top of his head.
A sappy feeling settled in your stomach. Seeing him saturated after half an hour trying to get something done softened your heart.
He suddenly looked up, but when he caught you looking too, John quickly dropped his head.
Five more minutes and he passed you the notebook.
“Voilà. Now you can laugh at me”
“I’m not gonna laugh at you. No one is born knowing” you responded quietly.
Silently revising his answers, you got distracted remembering one thing he said earlier.
Rosiness present in your cheeks, your gaze settled cautiously upon him. “You don’t like me?”
His brows drew together in deep puzzlement.
“What?”
“‘Out of all the people in class, it had to be you’” you quoted him, your heart beating erratically. You were worried that its pumps would tear a hole in your chest. “I wanna know why you said that. Is it because you don’t like me?”
A muscle tickled in his jaw, but his expression was humourless.
“That’s not it”
You hoped his response would bloom into something more specific, but he remained with his mouth shut, tension building up between the two.
“What’s it?” you pressed.
Darkness igniting his eyes, he leaned back in his chair.
“Answering your previous question, I do. A lot, actually. That’s my issue”
Petrified, your pulse shot to the sky.
“Why is it an issue?”
“We both know why”
Was John Lennon telling you with all his chest that he was interested in dating you but that he’d never acted upon it ‘cause he assumed you were out of his league?
“You didn’t ask me about my feelings, not once”
“Why would I? You’re sweet and smart. I’m none of that”
Oh, Johnny boy. His words cracked your heart. Lies, they were cruel lies.
“What are you doing this Friday?” you inquired. “I don’t know if you know, but I really like painting. I held an exhibition at school—”
“I’m aware. I was there”
Warmth radiating up your body, you fought back a stunned gasp. “You went?”
He never mentioned it before.
Gazing in each other’s eyes longingly, a goofy side smile fleetingly graced his lips.
Electric tingles spread through your nervous system. You composed yourself with a toss of the head. And he dared to say he wasn’t sweet? You were drowning in diabetes.
“My point is, the school’s newspaper asked me to present something new, and I have yet to finish my piece. Maybe, if you want, you could join me and we make each other company. You can bring your guitar and play some music”
You’re adorable, he wanted to interrupt, mouth twitching.
“I guess I could do that” he said instead.
“Awesome” you bit on your bottom lip, thrilled.
“I’m concerned, though”
“Concerned?” your eyebrows snapped together. Was he having second thoughts? “About what?”
“Concerned that I will start developing venustraphobia now that I’m gonna spend more time with you”
Your laughter hugged his soul.
John contemplated stupefied how easy you made it to fall in love.
Just hearing your giggles was enough for him to understand he could never compose a melody more lovely and magical than that.
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bvllyhargrove · 5 years ago
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I’ll Take You For A Ride (Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader)
Summary - After fighting for your attention, Billy offers to drive you home...
Words- 3717
Notes - Too many sleepless nights went into this, I forgot how to write smut halfway through the scene and this was born... I promise it’s not too horrible. Let me know what you think! It’s my first time writing for Billy and I genuinely enjoyed it 
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~~~
It was hot, the unforgiving Indiana sun rays beating down on your chest as you tried your best to stay in the shadow of your umbrella. You canceled out the joyous screams and laughter coming from the water as you relaxed, sunglasses perched gently on the bridge of your nose.
You could hear the soccer mom's just a few occupied seats from you, drone on about a new lemonade recipe they perfected - just in time for summer. Not even your friend's constant chatter didn't penetrate your eardrums as you mindlessly sipped the new recipe of Coke through the cheap plastic straw.
Lucas swore the new recipe tasted better than the original, and you loved the kid just enough to try it. Years of babysitting for The Sinclairs were both a blessing and a curse on your end. He's been trying to date you since he was a toddler.
"What about a job at the mall? Steve works there... at that ice cream place." Carol murmurs behind her pocket mirror. Somehow, In the hundred-degree heat, she still cared about her makeup. It was a blessing that it wasn't melting off of her.
"Give it up, he won't date you, he's dating Nancy Wheeler." Your eyes flicker over the crowded pool, lips turning down in disgust. There was no way in Hell that you would be caught dead in that water... with all of those kids... the mere thought made your skin crawl.
Carol shifted in her seat, moving the mirror away from her face to glare at you. "Uh, no he's not. Isn't Nancy Wheeler dating Jonathan Byers?" You shrugged, eyes slipping closed under your sunglasses.
"Ugh, Nancy is dating Jonathan? Like, barf me out..."
"What about the lifeguard? Do you know her?" You watched her descend the lifeguard stand, nibbling mindlessly on her whistle. Carol cocked an eyebrow, shaking her head.
"No, I've never seen her a- who is that...?" She tugged her sunglasses from her nose to glance at the shirtless male lifeguard making his way to take Heather's spot. "Is that Billy Hargrove? Holy shit."
Eyes turned to him, girls gaping as they walked past him. He was beautiful, the soft tan of his skin contrasting perfectly with the red of his swim trunks. You lifted your sunglasses as well, watching with mysterious eyes as he walked closer to you, sharing pleasantries with the soccer moms. He walked past you, his eyes lingering. He seemed to move in slow motion as you pull your bottom lip between your teeth - a movement that Billy noticed.  
"Afternoon girls." He spoke slowly, his tone dripping with seduction. You breathed out a hot sigh, the blazing hundred-degree heat feeling more like a thousand on your skin.
Carol shot him a smirk, eyes sultry. "Hi, Billy."
Billy's eyes rake down your body, chewing on the end on his whistle. "The shades... they're rad." He murmured, teeth still bitten down on the metal. You shook your head, looking down.
"Thank you, Billy."
"Anytime." He shot you a wink, glancing at Carol and giving her a smirk. He moved his gaze back in front of him as he continued his path to the lifeguard tower.
"Oh, my God. He totally was eyeing you up! Y/N, this is big!" She sat up, grabbing onto your arm obnoxiously.
"Not even." You fixed your shades, before taking your coke back in your hands and taking a tentative sip, turning your nose up at the flat texture of the drink.
"Even!" She nodded enthusiastically. "Go up there and talk to him!"
"Carol, no." You waved her off, moving to grab your flip flops. "But I am going to get a bottle of water. Come with?" After Carol shook her head 'no', you stood, grabbing your wallet and making your way to the concession stand, trying your best to dodge the icky, sweaty kids passing by you.
You arrived at the stand, breathing out a sigh when the shade of the roof covered your overheated body. A short line of consumers stood ahead of you, taking their time in ordering their overpriced soft drinks and sticky half-melted ice cream.
"What's your poison, I'm buying." You jumped, looking to your left where Billy stood next to you. A delicious sheen of sweat covered his body delicately, giving his rippling muscles a more defined look. You simply shook your head, reaching for your money.
"Do you think I'm incapable of buying my own water?" You scoff, stepping forward as the line grew sparse.
You weren't dumb, you've heard about The Billy Hargrove. The handsome seducer that made girls cream their pants with a mere smirk from him. You weren't that naive to fall into his trap, no matter how deep his icy glare or how tempting his full, pink smirk was as he worked a piece of spearmint gum between his teeth.
"Come on, princess, don't make me beg, now." He chuckles, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth. You fought back a gasp, turning your gaze dead in front of you. His laugh was impeccably deep, stirring something from inside of you.
Fuck. You were fucked.
"No need to beg. You're not a child." You shrugged, inching towards the counter. There was one more person in front of you and Billy was still glued to your side. He cocked an eyebrow, ghosting out another chuckle.
"Calling me a child, Y/N? That's not very nice..."
You ignored him, asking for water once you got to the concession stand. Billy shook his head in disbelief, once again, laughing.
"Now you're ignoring me... playing hard to get, hm? Well, lucky for you, I quite enjoy a challenge."
"Shove it up your ass, Hargrove." You snatched the water placed on the counter for you and went to fish money from your wallet.
"Put it on my tab, hm?" He spoke slowly before placing a hand on your lower back, leading you back to the pool area. You felt a rush of excitement course through you at the defiance you shown. You couldn't deny that you wanted Billy, but he didn't need to know that. Not yet.
~
You and your friend waited until the sun started to set and the pool emptied of the countless children before starting to pack up. Thoroughly exhausted and sweaty.
You dreamed of getting into the shower, standing under the cool spray as water cascaded down your back, washing the stink and dirt from the day down the drain. The shower was your happy place, a place you could be alone with your thoughts long enough without disruption.
You craved silence and peace...
"Hey, Y/N," Your eyes screwed shut as you halted in your steps towards the entrance. Billy pulled a cigarette from his jean pocket, lighting it quickly before taking a slow, steady drag of the cancerous haze.
He was dressed simply, a change from his shirtless torso and red swim trunks. His tight jeans hugged his slim legs almost breathtakingly perfect and his loose-fitting pale pink button-up barely even buttoned halfway down his sun-kissed, ab rippled chest.
"Go ahead and leave, Y/N's friend..." He waved Carol off haphazardly. The setting sun cast an almost terrifyingly angelic glow on his face, his light eyes reflecting the golden rays - luring you in.
Your body unofficially belonged to him, you knew it.
"Uh, okay? Are you okay with that, Y/N?" She rose her eyebrow at you, a slight teasing gaze painting her features. You shrugged, nodding slowly. You turned to Billy, crossing your arms over your chest in slight defiance.
"Don't make me beg," He stared back at you, blowing his mouthful of smoke in your face. You wanted to slap that smug look off of his face but you also loved it. Making him fight for what he wants. It's obvious he's never had to before.
"Get on your knees, cowboy. Beg."
"What?" Billy chuckled, looking to the ground. You shrugged, urging him on.
"You want to drive me home? You beg."
He flicked the grey-hot ash onto the pavement before hiking up the fabric of his jeans and falling on one knee in front of you. "I can't believe I'm doing this..." He mutters, peering up at you with childlike innocence. "Oh, please, Y/N. Please let me drive you home." He tucks a curl behind his ear, smirking up at you.
You pretended to ponder for a few seconds before nodding. "Fine. I'll let you drive me home. Get up." Billy smiles gratefully, standing back on his feet and taking another slow drag of his cigarette before flicking it onto the ground, stomping it out. He was graceful as he holds his hand out for you.
"Take my hand and I'll take you to the stars."
"How corny." Carol snickers behind you, moving back towards the gate and to her car. The rising sound of crickets reached the two of you as you stood under the pink and golden sky. It looked almost out of a cheesy storybook.
You found your eyes gazing into his mysterious blues. Looking, searching, wanting... all of him.
He turned away on his heel, the smirk never leaving his face as he leads you out of the enclosed space, twirling his keys on his finger as he waves goodbye to his co-workers. You felt a new kind of confidence as you walked out of the pool with Billy Hargrove.
"This is my baby - A '79 Chevy Camaro. She's two and a half tons of pure, undisputed muscle." He knocked on the hood, sending a dull, metallic bang throughout the parking lot.
"So, are you an engine head?" You inquired, stepping into the passenger seat carefully. You could tell he took pride in the blue-tinted car. as you looked around the black interior. It was clean - you weren't expecting that much.
The ashtray, however, was full. Discarded butts of old cigarettes decorated the small compartment. The car smelled of cologne and smoke. It smelled like Billy, that delicious scent you wouldn't let your sinuses erase.
He climbed into the driver's side, keeping the door ajar as he fumbled around in the glove compartment, elbow resting on your thigh as he glanced up at you with those oh, so sinful jet blue eyes and those majestically long eyelashes.
You never understood how this beautiful man could be such a douche. But that's how all of the pretty boys were - hormonal idiots waving their dicks around without a care.
He finally retrieved a half-empty pack of gum, holding it up to you as an invitation which you denied. He shrugged, sitting back up in his seat and popping the thin white stick of the dry mint-flavored chicle into his mouth.
"You sure you don't want a piece, princess?" He flicked the metallic paper out of the window, working the gum between his teeth with a precise gaze, centered directly onto you.
"Uh - no." You cleared your throat, looking back outside of your window, finally letting yourself breathe the musty outside air. He was quick, shifting the car in drive professionally. He pressed on the gas, jerking the car into drive spaztically, causing both of your bodies to fall back in the hard leather seats.
He zoomed out of the parking lot, leaving a cloud of tire smoke in its wake.
~
A few minutes into the drive, to where - you weren't quite sure; the heady rock music played loudly inside of the car, irritating your eardrums. You've told Billy to turn it down multiple times, to which he ignored, playing it off as he couldn't hear your pleads over the songs.
Eventually, he reached over, turning the volume down to near mute as he glanced over his shoulder at you.
"Tell me about yourself." He drummed on the steering wheel to nonexistent music, his steady hand barely gripping the wheel as he rested his elbow on his thigh.
"There's not much to know about me." You shrug, glancing back over to him. He's still rapping his fingers obnoxiously on the wheel, light brown boyish curls moving almost angelically in the harsh wind. "Oh, well, I'm a babysitter. I sit for the Sinclairs, The Wheelers, etc."
"Yeah? Then you tell that creepy kid Lucas to stop harassing my sister. I tried to tell the little shit to keep her distance but she enjoys going against me. It's like she has a deathwish." He grumbled, tone harsh. You furrowed your eyebrows at the tone before shrugging it off. He was a universal douche, you doubt he acted differently to his family.
"You have a sister?"
"She's not my sister, just someone I had the grave misfortune of living with." He chews on his bottom lip impatiently as he turns into the parking lot of Hawkins High. You look around the familiar scenery, suddenly confused as to why he picked a high school to grope you at.
You knew his intentions, you weren't stupid.
And you knew you weren't the first girl to get fucked in the backseat of his car.
"I'm going to cut to the chase, baby. I want you. I've wanted you since I've seen you around the halls at school. I wanted you when that saw that sinful fucking body in that swimsuit at the pool. And I want you now, shivering in my presence." He spoke slowly, deep and brooding as he shifted the car in park, taking off his seatbelt and hovering close to you just over the console. You could feel his hot, minty, nicotine-laced breath on your hot skin, knocking the breath from your lungs.
Fuck.
"W-what?" Internally you screamed, hating the tiny squeak that left your red-bitten lips. He laughed darkly, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth even further. They were slick with sheen, red and pouty in the setting sun. His silver chain dipped from his shirt, landing on your slightly exposed chest. You shivered, eyes flitting closed.
"Beautiful..." He leaned closer, enclosing his lips around yours with haste. The kiss was messy and hot, teeth clacking together and tongues dancing in one another's mouth. He panted hotly against you, sliding a hand around your waist and pulling you even closer.
His hands were heated and quick as they explored your body just under your swimsuit cover and onto your stomach, feeling the soft skin under his fingertips.
You were melting, his touch beckoning you in. You were already aching, the buzz of arousal already pooling between your clenched thighs.
He pulled away, quick. Panting against your sucked raw mouth, causing a low, high whine to escape your parted lips. You needed him but you weren't surprised that he was a tease. Always a fucking tease...
"Billy... no." You breathe, tasting him on your tongue. He tasted just how you thought, of cigarettes and mint. It was his smell, his taste. You couldn't get over it.
It made you dizzy, needy... for him.
"Oh, what's that, princess?" He teased slowly, keeping his eyes steadily staring into yours. You shook your head, parting your thighs.
"I need it."
He attached his lips to yours again, nibbling on your bottom lip and slipping his tongue into your awaiting mouth. You focused on his every movement, the pulsing ache in your cunt becoming more evident with every single drag of his lips. "Get in the backseat, I want you absolutely naked." His words are articulated and dense, and if you weren't wet before, you are now.
You were quick, shoving off your loose-fitting bathing suit cover-up as you climbed over the console, your bare feet pushing against the upholstery of the car. You could hear the low jingle of Billy unlatching his belt and pulling down his zipper - still sitting densely in the driver's seat. He rolls up the windows, looking around at the barren parking lot to ensure the both of you were alone.
Your hands were busy pulling and tugging at your suit, peeling the skin-tight material off of your body, leaving you exposed and panting, welcoming the cool summer night air on your skin.
He was dark and brooding as he climbed over the console, fully unbuttoned shirt clinging onto his shoulders and half-opened jeans sitting tightly on his hips. He ran his tongue over his slick top lip at the sight of you. You could make out the half-mast outline of his cock through his jeans, making you shudder.
He hovered himself over you, noses touching. You breathed in his carbon dioxide and he breathed in yours. You reached up to tangle your fingers in his curly locks, pulling him down to another passionate kiss, letting the first moan of the night slip from your lips as you felt the rough fabric of his jeans and the outline of his sizeable member rutting against your thigh.
You threw your head back against the window, grinding down into his touch. You couldn't focus on anything else as your wetness fell onto the seat underneath you, soaking your thighs. He caught onto your neediness. You were right where he wanted you, soaked and writhing under him.
"Off, take them off." You breathed out, moving your finger down to tug at the fabric. He let you, looking down to you with those fucking eyelashes. Everything about this rippling man was perfection.
You dipped your thumb into the waistband of his tight briefs, pulling them down just so you could sneak your hand under the fabric, cupping him tightly through his pants. He finally let his eyes slip shut, his pink lips parting in a silent moan. You let your nimble fingers explore his thick length, mapping out the prominent veins on the underside.
"That's enough." He shot open his eyes, sitting back on his heels and tugging off his jeans and boxers, tossing them in the front seat haphazardly before taking his entire length in his hands, stroking his hand over it with a sly smirk.
"Like what you see?" He takes his free hand, spitting crudely in the palm before spreading it on the head of his already leaking cock. You bite out another moan, chewing on your bottom lip.
"Jesus fucking Christ..." You mutter, rubbing your thighs together, eager and begging wet-lipped for friction. You needed it, craved it, even.
"Language," He warned, hovering back on top of you, keeping himself balanced as one hand blindly leads his length towards your weeping cunt. It took all of your might to not sink down him as he pressed the head of his cock inside of you, watching your face intently as it twisted and morphed into one of utter pleasure, even pain as he stretched you out as no other man has before.
His hands grazed your skin, dull nails scratching down the insides of your thighs as he impaled himself deeper and deeper inside of you, keeping his bottom lip prisoner between his teeth, like always. You fisted his hair, already dampened with sweat as you tried to get used to the uncomfortable stretch.
Slowly, that pain morphed into immense pleasure, sending your eyes rolling back in your head. He bottomed out, leaning down to kiss and bite at your neck, leaving the skin irritated with his hickeys. You cried out at the contradicting feelings, wanting to focus on the hot wetness of his mouth but also needing him to just give in and fuck you already.
You let out a strangled sob as he rocked into your tight cunt, his mouth parted so perfectly the entire time, and his god-like eyelashes casting shadows onto his boyish face.
You found yourself staring at him, taking in his blissed-out expression as sharp moans fell from your lips. There was a refreshing gentility to how he fucked you - he rolled his hips into you, savoring how your walls clenched and spasmed around him
The air was hot with perspiration as he finally focused eye contact on you, curling his lips into a smirk as he strengthened his thrusts, nearly at the point of punishing as you already felt your orgasm flip and jump in the pit of your stomach.
"B-Billy!" You moaned, wrapping your legs around him tight, trying to get him deeper. You needed him deeper. Your toes curled, legs spasming as you felt the tip of his cock brush against that silvery sweet spot inside of you that made you scream at the top of your lungs
The hot leather stuck to the skin on your back, chafing the skin as you focused on your impending orgasm, sneaking up on you sinfully as you fisted at Billy's locks. "I-I'm close." You bit out, doing anything to get more friction where you needed it the most. He didn't take his eyes off of yours, drinking in your drunk off of pleasure expression as he fucked you into heaven.
"Cum, baby. Cum all over my cock, hm?" He whispered, nostrils flaring as his breathing picked up. He muttered out a string of curse words, eyes slipping shut as he used your cunt like a toy, chasing his impending orgasm.
It didn't take you much longer before you were seizing under him, cunt spasming and quaking around his length as you came, your hot liquids gushing around him. Your eyes fluttered as you fucked yourself down onto his cock. Still needing to feel every single inch of him.
You were whining with sensitivity, unwinding your arms from Billy as you grip the car seat for purchase. His thrusts barely faltered as he reached his high, throwing his head back in a guttural moan as he pulled out unexpectedly, letting the head of his already weeping cock fall on your lower stomach, letting his cum paint your sweat sticky stomach.
"Fuck! You fucking - Uh!!" The muscles in his arms tensed beautifully, allowing you to make out every defined tendon and vein. You bit down on your lip, the sticky cum on your stomach already drying.
"Take me home now?" Your arms shook as you sat up, everything single part of you in disarray. You sat in a pool of your sticky arousal, grimacing when you felt your skin peel away from the leather.
He simply chuckled, shaking his head. "Oh, no princess. I have plans for you." He scooted closer to you, dragging a finger down your chin. "Big plans."
1K notes · View notes
pixiedst · 4 years ago
Text
Dance With Me 01 // KYG
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Request from @lost-midnight-flower​​
Hiii can I request a got7 fic? Maybe something along the lines of meeting the guys at a fan meeting or something and one of them falling head over heals with the reader? That seems pretty cute to me, is that weird? If you choose to write this, you can pick which member you want to write about ^^ have a great day/evening ahead! 
Genre: Fluff Pairing: Reader x Yugyeom Rating; PG-13 Warnings: None Description: Dance studio owner Y/N meets Yugyeom at a fan sign.  Word Count: 2,197 A/N: I’m sorry if my writing isn’t very good 😓 I haven’t written fanfiction in over a year. Let me know if you have any feedback! I’m always looking for ways to improve my writing!! 
Index // Part Two // Part Three // Part Four
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Dear Yugyeom,
Hello! My name is Y/N. I’m not really sure what to say and I don’t even know if you’ll read this, but here it goes.
I’ve been a fan for a long time, and I don’t regret a single moment. You captured my attention when I first watched your music videos. Your dancing is phenomenal, and you’ve inspired me to keep chasing my dreams of becoming a professional dancer. I’m sure I could never reach your level, but I managed to start a dance studio! It’s nothing big, but maybe that will change! Whatever happens, I just want to thank you for being the biggest inspiration in my journey.
I hope reading this will make you proud of yourself, for using your platform and abilities to bring hope to your fans, and maybe of me, for being able to get closer to my dreams because of you.
Thank you. I’m not sure what I would do without you.
Yours, Y/N
Yugyeom isn’t sure this is real. He reads the letter again, but it’s all the same. He’s used to praises, confessions, proposals, even, but being inspired enough to start a studio is a first. She’s telling him to be proud of himself, but he almost feels unworthy. He’s nothing special, yet here she is, commending him for her success. 
He laughs. Something ripples in his chest. He has to see her again, ask how her studio is going, if she’s well. The letter is too short, and he’s left with a bundle of questions. 
“Thank you. I’m not sure what I would do without you.”
He’s met so many fans and even gets familiar with a couple faces, but that’s it. It’s a busy life. But for whatever reason, he doesn’t want to forget Y/N.
-
Y/N wishes, more than anything, that relating to people were easier. 
She’d think to deal with her friends for two years would make her a professional, but her progress has been nothing but linear. They’re her colleagues—technically employees—but she doesn’t want to be alone. She has to be a good boss, a good teacher, and overall, a good friend. But God, are they exhausting.
They’re not terrible people and they have their moments, but she can’t find it in herself to care about Kim Soohyun starring in a new drama. It’s almost amazing how similar they are, like soulmates. It’s just a little unfair she wasn’t part of the package. 
“Y/N. Have you seen Royal Lover yet?” Sunhee asks.
Y/N takes a sip from her juice. She needs to come up with something fast. “That’s actually next on my list. I was planning to watch it later.” She’s going to regret this.
There’s nothing wrong with dramas. In fact, they’re great, but she’d like to watch them for herself at her own pace. They’re not exactly forcing her, but doing this is better than being excluded. This is how she finished five dramas in less than three weeks.
“Okay, okay, finish it as soon as possible! It’s sooo good. I cried at the end,” Areum says, and wipes a barbecue sauce stain on her shirt. She couldn’t care less about the mess, but she was fuming about Heechul and Momo’s relationship a minute ago. “Jia, what did you think about the ending?”
Jia, although busy on her phone, doesn’t waste a moment to reply. “All I’m gonna say for now is that I think it has one of the best endings in K-Drama history. We can text about it later, but we should stay quiet for now until Y/N finishes it.”
Areum shakes her head. “No, let’s text about it now!”
The rest of the lunch is quiet except for keyboard clicks and laughter. There’s no use getting their attention now. Y/N slumps against her wooden chair and sighs. Her eyes wander to a family in the indoor area of the cafe where they laugh at something the father says. She can’t remember the last time anyone listened to her like that. She looks back at the girls. 
Why can’t she be more like them? They’re weird, but they aren’t alone. They have people to talk to and connect with. Is there something she missed? Was there a handbook for social skills she never received? 
Why does she feel alone when they’re right in front of her? 
-
The metal seat is cool against the bottom of her thighs, and she instantly regrets wearing shorts. It took her a few stops to get seated. Her legs were ready to give in to the fatigue, so she’s not sure if she should feel guilty for hurrying after the seat before a child could take it. 
His mother glares at her, and she wishes she could explain herself, that she’s a dancer and needs to sit down after a long day at the studio. But the child pouts and looks at her too, and it bites at her conscience. She checks the map above the doors. Her stop is two stations away. 
She rises from her seat with a sigh and takes their place in the center. They don’t even thank her, but she doesn’t blame them. She closes her eyes and focuses on Yugyeom’s voice playing through her earphones.
Bad days aren’t so bad when she has GOT7. 
When she gets home, she prepares a bowl of ramen and a glass of milk, and spends the rest of the evening watching Royal Lovers, already wishing for it to be over. 
-
Yugyeom’s heart is going to leap out of his chest. 
The gold lights cast a soft glow in the room, and it makes the event feel cozy. Dark red theater chairs fill the compact hall, most of them already occupied. He searches through the crowd and looks away as soon as he finds Y/N. She’s here. It’s difficult, but he tries to look at other fans and focus on waving hello. This is gonna be tough, he thinks.
There are camera flashes, conversations, and the boys at his side. The fan sign is open, and the first batch approaches. Everything is familiar. Everything is the same. 
Except he can’t wait to meet a certain fan. 
-
Time is not in Y/N’s favor today. It’s too fast for her to process every second. She’s already finished talking to Jaebeom. Mark. Youngjae. 
There are too many words fumbling in her mind, she doesn’t even know what they are. The few she catches are too awkward to form coherent sentences. If only she could dance what she wants to say, but she would rather not make a fool of herself. 
Before she could realize, she’s standing before Yugyeom. 
“Welcome back!” He says and signs her album quickly. “Y/N, right? I read your letter from last time.”
Y/N tries to catch her breath. “You remember me? And you read my letter?”
He nods and takes her hands. His fingers clasp between hers, and he does this without breaking eye contact. Y/N’s heart races and her hands tremble. She tries to push every thought to the back of her head because there is no way this gesture could mean anything. He’s an idol. Fan service is part of the job, and clearly, he’s very good at it. 
“How’s the studio?” He asks.
“It’s steady. I could use more students, though. You know, with rent and everything,” she replies.
He nods. “That’s good. Just keep working hard, and it’ll be worth it.” He pauses for a moment before asking, “Do you have a letter today?”
Y/N’s heart beats a thousand times faster, and she hasn’t even had coffee. Why is he asking for a letter? Did he like the one she wrote? He did remember her. She didn’t even have to remind him of her name. Heat rises in her cheeks. If only she knew he’d want to hear more from her.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I was binging a K-Drama and forgot to write one.”
He looks down before he meets her eyes again. “That’s all right. Are you coming to the next fan sign?” 
She nods. “Yes! I’ll write you a letter by then!” She takes her hands away for a moment to pull bunny ears out of her bag. “This is compensation.”
Yugyeom lowers his head and lets her place it for him. When he looks up, a staff woman from behind places her arm between them before he could speak. His body droops as he releases a sigh. Time’s up. 
He takes her hands one more time and shakes them like pom-poms. “See you next time, Y/N. Fighting!” 
Y/N’s heart soars. Even as she faces the rest of the members, her mind replays her meeting with Yugyeom. His hands are gentler, and his smile is wider. It’s like he was genuinely happy to see her. If only she could return to the back of the line and talk to him for a few minutes more. 
Like a movie stuck on repeat, her memories are full of Yugyeom. She doesn’t care when people glare at her as she hums in the train, or when she almost hits a woman with her swinging arms at the sidewalk. 
She couldn’t be happier. And it’s all thanks to Yugyeom. 
-
Y/N is sure her eyes are fried. 
They’re sore from the bright TV screen that illuminates the dark living room, which she knows was already a bad choice. She didn’t have the energy to turn on the lights when the sun went down. 
She wasn’t completely unproductive, though. On the coffee table is her laptop uploading a new YouTube video. It’s not a big channel, but the comments make up for it. It’s the only place, along with Instagram, where she feels like she has a voice. 
Reality, on the other hand, has a different idea. It’s where she has to watch dramas 3 nights in a row to satisfy girls who only talk to her because she’s their boss. The only voice she has around them is directions in the studio and forced opinions. 
She takes a deep breath and opens the group chat. 
Y/N: I finished Royal Lover! I give it a 7/10. But you’re right, Areum, that ending was really good! Made me tear up!
Even typing that was draining. 
Jia: Finally kkk
Sunhee: Sorry, we moved on to Children of the Sun. You should watch it!
Areum: SO!! GOOD!! It’s about a doctor and a soldier falling in love!! I’M CRYING!!!!
“Unbelievable,” she mutters.
Except it isn’t. They’re the type to jump onto the next band-wagon in a snap. She shouldn’t be surprised. She sighs and slams her phone on the couch. There is no way she’s watching Children of the Sun. What kind of title is that, anyway? It’s time to take a break from dramas. The girls might throw a fit, but it wouldn’t be the first time.
SURPRISE LIVE: OLOLOLOLO
Y/N laughs at the title. A change from the weight on her shoulders. Their noise fills the room, which she prefers over clashing swords and exaggerated sobs. Her shoulders relax, and she takes a deep breath. GOT7 salvaged her night. 
“Let’s read some comments,” Youngjae says, leaning closer to the phone. “Say hi to Brazil. Hello. Bambam, speak French.”
“Baguette.”
Y/N throws her head back laughing and almost kicks her laptop off the table. She places it on the other end of the couch before coming back to the stream. The live chat is rapid, but she types a comment anyway. Maybe today will be her lucky day. 
Mark takes the phone from Youngjae. “Yugyeom, someone is asking what you’ve been up to lately.”
Y/N almost drops her phone. That’s her question! She licks her lips and grips on the cushion as she leans closer to the screen. 
“Oh, I’ve been watching a lot of dance videos! I enjoy watching fans cover our songs. It makes me feel proud. Some of them are even better than us.” The members hum in agreement. “Guys, if you have any dance covers or any dance videos at all, tag us! They make us really happy!”
Bambam nods. “Don’t be ashamed! Even if you’re just a beginner, we’re here to support you. We’re a team, guys! Fighting!”
She doesn’t wait for the live to end. She runs to her bedroom and rummages through the messy drawers. There’s no time to waste. The words flow right out of her pen, and she doesn’t care if the message is messy. She doesn’t know how long it takes but the ache in her spine and hand tell her it’s been a while. 
“Don’t be ashamed!”
They’re right. Dancing is who she is. It’s everything she’s ever done, and all she’ll ever do until her bones don’t allow it. She did not start a studio to be ashamed. She did it to grow. GOT7 may not notice her videos under the infinite amount on Instagram.
But there is a certain member who might.
-
Part Two 
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ambistep · 5 years ago
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Play Date, part 1
Mina’s feeling some years. Training with Herald hits a snag - but she has a solution: a play date with her other student. Definitely not a calculated move working toward some larger objective.
Planned for three parts. Retribution spoilers.
“Again.”
His hip is out too far. There’s that hitch in his movement - you don’t even need telepathy to identify the exact moment he hesitates about hitting you, it’s all over his form. He follows through on the punch at least - and you lean back out of the way. And like you made him practice - right cross, left hook, short punch, jab, jab, and he should move his foot and- 
“Wrong.” You sweep his ankle and to his credit, he stops himself before he trips up, floating - but unguarded. To make your point, you jab him twice in his stomach - the sensation still feels weird, hitting him when he’s hovering, that lack of resistance. A slap on the side of the head is a bit of reach for you, but worth it for punctuation.
He grimaces and touches back down, backing off, “Ow.” You roll your eyes, both of you know that didn’t hurt. “I thought it was pretty good there. Until I tried to do that… southpaw thing.”
“‘Good,’ hm? You don’t commit to your approach until way late.” You pace away, retrieving a water bottle, trying to ignore the nagging pain in your back that’s starting to feel like something more. 
“I mean, yeah, but I think the Herald Style thing is working out, I just… it’s a lot to remember.”
“It’s not about remembering it, it’s about drilling until you don’t have to remember - and we’re not calling it that.” Coming up with approaches that suited his special case - all his strength came from his momentum and upper body and he could hardly stay in place - maybe because of the way his power had taught him how to move. It had taken some thinking, but it was the only way to teach him anything. And you weren’t going to call it Herald Style. 
Danny watches you, a look of confusion crossing his face, “What’s the matter?” What? Had he actually noticed you favoring your back? More perceptive than you gave him credit for. Irritating. Sloppy of you.
“Some of us aren’t in our twenties anymore, alright?” He starts to say something, that comforting look already painted all over his face, and you cut him off, “You worry about yourself. This isn’t supposed to be fun, alright?” You sigh, “It’s just a twinge in a muscle. Forget it.” 
He smiles in a way that - God, that better not be pity. “We can stop for today - I’ll hit the bags and you can yell at me.” 
“I don’t yell.” Okay, that was a bad lie, “I don’t yell that much. Only when I need to. And I need to, alright?” You settle down on the bench - and the fact that it does make that little pain your back vanish is all that much worse. 
Heck. Unbidden, thoughts about your… condition come to mind. What if there’s like, Cellular degradation, genetic breakdown, stuff. You’re making up words to worry about, that stuff isn’t real. But it could be…
There’s an uncomfortably bright ray of sunshine there to stir you out of your bad thoughts, “Mina?”
Clearing your head, you sigh a little, put on a show of it for him. You put a little bit of Steel in your voice, “Do you know who the Tenth Street Tiger is?”
Herald can recognize that tone, knows you’re doing your grumpy teacher bit. He moves for his water, wiping down a bit with a towel, “I… I don’t know, I think I heard Ortega talking ab-”
“The Tenth Street Tiger is a tong enforcer, a gangster, you know what she does?”
“I don’t know. Gangster things.” He shrugs.
“That’s right. Gangster things, like extortion, protection rackets, selling drugs. Out of a club on Alexandria and 10th, she’s been doing it for ten years. She’s too small time for the Ranger, because she’s not putting on a mask and robbing armored cars, blowing up galas.” 
“Come on,” Danny starts to protest. Good - think about that, Danny. Get angry about something. “That’s not fa-” You chew your lip, searching for the buttons to press, cutting him off before he says anything else.
“If Herald walked into her club, right now, and caught her in the middle of a bunch of her ‘gangster things’, you know what would happen? She’d take you out, easy, beat you down - use her power.”
“A gangster, Mina?” Danny is getting a bit pouty, his towel wrapped around his hands as he suffers your lecture. “You really think I couldn’t take her? What’s her power?”
“No, you couldn’t - they have low ceilings in there.” You snort a little, imagining him stuck on the rafters, “Her power is that she trains, every single day, like her life depends on it, so that when some clown like Figure Eight or the Handyman decides they’re going to be the one to cage the Tiger, she’s ready. That’s how you be a gangster in Los Diablos for ten years - you get too big for the little guys, and stay too small for the Guardians or the Rangers.” Or you make like Hollow Ground, but that’s another story.
Danny narrows his eyes, taking a long drink from his water bottle. “You made all that up, didn’t you?”
Fine. It’s so hard to stay irritable at him - maybe it would be easier if you dug down deeper for that real anger, that Clarity anger - but he isn’t ready for that. It isn’t for him. You match his look, raising an eyebrow, “I don’t know, did I?” 
“I’m asking Ortega.” He laughs, maybe just happy you’re not pretending to be mad at him anymore, “We can skip on Friday.”
“No, no - listen, I have an idea. If you’re up for it.” His eyebrows tilt up, that puppy curiosity on his face. Yeah, he’d be good for her to practice with. “I’ve been helping out someone else too, training like this.”
“You were helping someone else train?” His smile is instant, that big grin. Of course that thrilled him. Another confirmation of his hopes - that you’re still out there helping others, that you’re still a hero even if you’re not a Hero. He has no idea.
“Don’t make a big deal out of it, alright? It’s not a hero thing. Not exactly.” No, it really isn’t. “She’s a student at UCLD, I think it’d be good for you both to work with someone that isn’t me.” Clarity had timetables that couldn’t be moved if you hurt your back playing with the kids, after all.
There’s a rare shadow of reluctance on his face - what is that? Worried about his privacy? It passes, and he shrugs, “Sure - if she’s your friend, I’m sure it’s fine.”
“She’ll be discrete. About the Hero thing,” you promise. He nods as he wipes down, that easy smile, unconcerned. The trust stings, just a little. It’s hard, sometimes, to think about what you’re doing with Danny. He’s so sincere, hopeful, that it almost scrambles your motivation. 
Are you pretending to be friendly with him, to help him, so that you can use him, twist him around and keep Clarity happy? Or are you pretending to use and manipulate him as an excuse to hang around in his sunlight, to allow yourself a friend and keep Mina happy? For awhile, you thought they were both just masks you put on, neither real. But it’s getting more and more complicated - or you’re making it complicated.
In the parking lot, you reach into your bag, pull out Clarity’s phone - not Mina’s - they look the same but there’s weight to one the other doesn’t have. You’re pretty sure, anyway.
“Hey, Clar.” The voice on the other line is… crunching on something crispy.
“Shouldn’t answer the phone like that. I could’ve been someone else.” You pinch your nose, staving off a headache as you head down the sidewalk. “Also, please. Nehal. Don’t eat so close to the phone. It’s… really loud.”
There’s a pause. “Sorry.” The crunching stops. “What’s up, boss?”
“Need you on Friday - probably most of the afternoon.”
There’s some shifting and shuffling on the other end of the line, and Nehal’s voice gets closer to the phone, “Yeah? Just me? Is this a job?” Then more cautiously, “Or more training?”
“Job and training. Dress cute.” Better to clarify, “Not too cute.” Just moving pieces, people around. It’s so easy, lately. You’re the one picking missions now. You wonder if maybe that’d make Them proud, in some way.
“Huh. Who’s my date?” She knows the game - you told her you’d show her how to play it. Teach her the things they taught you. But not the same way they taught you. 
“That’s kind of a long story. You’ll know him.”
“Ooo. Someone famous.” A laugh on the line, “I’m in.”
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xiaodejunletsact · 6 years ago
Text
the rain | mark lee
Tumblr media
word count: 3,053
genre: angst, soulmate!au (?)
warnings: emotional rollercoaster
author’s note: this was initially a time stamp but it got too long so I decided to make it a little something for you guys!! I’ve had this idea for a while and finally got to writing it just recently. I hope you like it!! (Btw this like high key sucks but I wanted to get it out of my system)
synopsis: no matter how many times you retold him the story of the prophecy that led you to him, mark always brushed it off as one your silly theories and made up stories. until one night, he gets the wake up call he needed.
Mark sighs as he steps out of the cold night and into the warmth of the flower shop. The bell ringing above him alerting the elderly man behind the counter of his presence, mark can only assume he’s the owner or worker and sends a polite smile his way as he welcomes him.
Mark sighs once again as he looks around the shop, utterly clueless when it comes to buying flowers. He just knows by seeing it in movies and his older friends’ relationships, whenever your girlfriend gets mad at you; the best option is to get her flowers. And you were currently brewing in anger and piling frustration at him so Mark found himself here in the only flower shop in Seoul open at this time at night.
The colors and meanings of the flowers all blend in his head as he looks at them confusedly. He jumps when he hears a voice behind him.
“You need some help there. young man?” The old man that once stood behind the counter stands next to Mark. He’s holding a bouquet of flowers in his hands, flowers of kinds that mark has seen before and other he hasn’t, all wrapped in clear plastic and slightly dusted with glitter. It’s pretty. mark wants something like that for you.
He chuckles nervously at the man’s question before scratching the back of his neck. “Yeah, I don’t really know a lot about flowers.”
The man nods and sends him a polite smile. “It’s a good thing I know I good amount then, isn’t it?” He lets out a chuckle and nudges Mark’s arm.
Mark lets out a soft laugh at his words before saying, “Yeah, I guess so.”
“So tell me, are they for a certain someone?” The man says as he leans over to place the bouquet in a vase by the window, putting it on display for the dark streets of the Seoul nightlife.
Mark sighs at the thought of the situation the two of you are in right now and nods. “Yep, for my girlfriend.”
The man hums as turns back towards Mark, examining his face for a while before speaking, “I’m guessing things aren’t so good?”
“How can you tell?”
“You’ve sighed about 30 times since you’ve walked in, boy. And I know the sight of a man who’s buying flowers to give in exchange for forgiveness all to well.” He chuckles and walks around Mark going behind the counter once again. Mark nods at his explanation, it seems fair enough.
“A big fight, I suppose?”
Mark fights back another sigh as he replies, “various, actually.”
“Why is that?”
Mark shakes his head, “I don’t know, every night I get home and she’s there ready to throw another argument at me. To tell me I’m not home enough or something like that. It happens nearly everyday and I’m trying to make it work. But it’s just so hard.” He hears the man hum in response to his words.
“Are you away because of work?” Mark nods. The man turns his back to him and begins clipping away at something on his work table behind the counter.
“We’ve been together for 3 years now. So I want to make it work but the fighting has only gotten worse. I don’t know… if it’s even worth it anymore.” Mark knows he’s just venting at this point but it’s nice to talk to someone about this.
“Why don’t you tell me about her?” Mark looks at the man with a confused look before shrugging.
“What do you want to know?”
“How did you meet?”
Mark allows himself to dive into the abyss of his memories with you and smiles fondly as he recalls your first encounter. “I had been on a work trip out of town and I had just arrived at the train station. When I got out and she was just standing there under the pouring rain, getting drenched. I was confused as hell but I had my umbrella in my hand and I was going to offer it to her since she was shaking but before she could say anything this really huge gust of wind came and blew it out of my hand it went across the tracks and I was never able to get it back. She started laughing and saying that this elderly woman told her some prophecy… about how she told her amazing things would happen under the rain or something like that. She told me it was about me. I didn’t believe her,” he chuckles, his nails pick as a flier stuck to the glass counter. “I thought she was crazy, but I let myself go along with it for that night. Until we got serious and now I’m here.”
The man turns around for a moment before looking back at his work. “So she believes in those types of superstitions?”
Mark nods but the remembers that the man can’t see him. “Yeah, she always has.”
“That’s very smart of her.” The man hums, snipping away at some ribbons. Mark agrees, you are very smart. Out of this world intelligent, actually but he can’t find it in himself to believe the bewildering things you were telling him you experienced, that supposedly led you to him. The skeptic in him taking over whenever you retold the story. Despite the fact that the odd occurrence lead mark to the person who would 3 years later be the love of his life.
The man’s voice bleeds into his thoughts, “what do you like about her?” Mark stills at the question. Sure, he’s thought about the things he loves about you before but he’s never had to say them out loud to you. Let alone anyone else.
He sits in silence as you overwhelm his thoughts. He remembers the many nights you would come over to his old apartment with flowers in your hand, telling him that he’s place needed a bit of color which then led to a night of movies and slow dancing to different songs in his living room. The memory of feeling of your head pressed gently on his cheek and he swayed the two of you back and forth softly causing him to smile slightly. Your soft giggles whenever he would tickle your ribs as you lay on his sheets thrashing and desperately trying to get away from him. The soft smile on your face as the morning sun comes through the windows being the first thing he sees every morning and the fact that it made him so happy. When you would get annoyed at him debunking all your magical or supernatural theories with a simple scientific fact and how your annoyance would only last a few minutes after he says cute things to earn your forgiveness. How you always had something new to teach him. How you always wanted to keep learning. The fact that you never complained about the fact that he was away for work so much, until recently when he started going out after work hours to drink with his friends while simultaneously deteriorating all the belief and trust you had for him every time he stumbled into the apartment babbling and stumbling.
You had always believed in him. You cheered him on every step of the way and he feels guilt weigh on his shoulders as he realizes that maybe he had taken that all for granted.
He sighs again, “there’s too much to say.” He ends the phrase with a chuckle, hoping that the man won’t detect the underlying sadness in his voice. The old man turns around and smiles at him, his wrinkled hands resting on the glass counter.
“Does her cooking taste good?”
Mark laughs at the odd question that distracts him from the emotions he had been feeling. “Yeah, it’s the best.”
“What are some things about that you don’t like?” He sends mark a curious look as he asks the question. Mark’s eyes widen. “Think about this hard, boy.”
“I…” Mark searches the depths of his mind for any recollection of negative feelings towards you. There has been times, mostly recently when you have made Mark feel bad. Or annoyed him. He looks back at the man who watches him expectedly. “Sometimes, she’s very blunt and… it hurts me. Now that I think about it, most of the time, I need to hear it.”
The man chuckles in amusement at the younger man. “So, even her faults are good?”
Mark chuckles softly, “I guess they are.”
“That’s the kind of affect women have on us.” He chuckles back at the boy, Mark looks down at his slightly wrinkled hands that are set one on top of one another on the glass counter. “But only one woman will make us feel the way she makes you feel.”
Mark’s eyes go up to the man’s face, watching him with expectant eyes, waiting for him to elaborate on what he had just said.
“The type of feeling that even after years of being together you still feel like your heart gets filled to the brim when you see her face first thing in the morning, when she cooks for you and you can taste love in every bite you take. The pure happiness you feel in your heart when you see her play with a child because you know she’ll be the best mother. That protective feeling when she were your clothes cause that means she’s yours, and the blissful feeling that you get when you realize that you are all hers too.” The man pauses for a moment and brings his eyes up to stare directly into Mark’s. “The fear you feel when things start to get bad and the regret you’re going to feel after she leaves because you gave up.”
It was a direct attack and it carried out its job well because his eyes fill with tears at the thought of lying in the bed that you once shared, alone. Of you leaving him after all he did to you. After he gave up on the extraordinary connection you two have. The thought grabs the sides of his heart and rips it in half. A tear rolls down his cheek which he tries to wipe quickly as the man turns to his station and grabs a beautiful bouquet of flowers of all your favorite colors. It’s covered in a light dust of glitter and there’s a light radiating of it, as if it was glowing. “It seems like its worth the fight now, isn’t it Mark?”
Mark doesn’t remember telling the man his name, but all he can worry about right now is getting to you and saying he’s sorry. “Go on now,” says the man as he shoves the bouquet into Mark’s arms and ushers him towards the door. “She’s waiting for you.”
“Wait! I didn’t even pay for the flowers!” Mark tries frantically to pull out his wallet but is interrupted when the man puts a hand on his wrist, stopping him.
“Just go to the train station, y/n will be there. Tell her you’re sorry for not believing that amazing things do indeed happen in the pouring rain.” The man pushes Mark towards the exit and out the door. Mark quickly turns around to question how the man knew your name but he is greeted with an empty shop.
What was once a well lit flower shop was now left abandoned and covered in dust as if he wasn’t just in there buying flowers. He gets closer to the glass and looks inside, there is no sign of the old man or even that there was every even a shop there in the first place. He looks down confusedly at the flowers in his hand and at that moment, as if on cue, rain started pouring down from the sky seeping through his clothes and soaking his hair. His breath hitches as he inhaled deeply and gripped the flowers tighter, a strong determination entering his body. He has to find you.
-
Mark can’t explain the relief that floods through his body when he sees you sitting on the bench at the train station, getting drenched. His heart hurts as he sees the expression you’re wearing. It looks like you’ve been crying, you’re staring straight forward with a tired look on your face.
“Y/n?”
Your head immediately spins to him as you hear his voice, eyes widening when you see the man whom you love. He walks around the bench, setting the flowers on the seat next to you as he kneels in front of you and rests his hands on your knees. It’s only then, that you notice that his eyes are bloodshot and there are tears streaming down his cheeks that mix with the rain. “What’s wrong, Mark?”
He lets his head fall against your thighs as he lets out a sob and chokes out, “I’m sorry” His voice breaks.
“I’m sorry for the way I’ve been treating you recently. I’ve been a terrible to you.”
He’s too busy crying to notice you shaking your head at his words, you grab the sides of his face and make him face you. “That’s not true. We’re both to blame for the way things have been.”
“Y/n,” he whispers, his face still resting in between your palms. “I love you more than anything. You make everything worth it, everything. You are my purpose and it’s stupid of me to realize that only now. I’m sorry that i didn’t believe you when you said that amazing this would happen in the rain all those years ago, I was wrong.” The warmth of his tears has started to pool at the palm of your hand.
“You saw him?”
Mark nods, “he helped remind me of what really mattered and that everything I could ever want has been right in front of me this whole time and I was too dumb to see it.”
“You’re not dumb.” You whisper, looking into his teary eyes. Your heart fills with love as you see the emotion and sincerity swimming inside them. “I’m sorry that Ive been so tough on you lately about the partying and stuff. I was just scared.”
“Scared of what?”
“That prophecy was wrong. That maybe us meeting under the rain that night was just… a coincidence, and you would leave me and find somebody better.” After you poor your heart to him his hands cup the sides of your face, your own hands fall to your lap as you face him. His eyes bore into yours as he shakes his head.
“Y/N even if the prophecy didn’t exist, I would’ve still chosen you and I would choose you again and again and again because for me, there’s no one better. I’m sorry that you ever doubted that.”
You’ve started crying with him. Tears and rain mixing as they run down your cheeks and pool on Mark’s palms, you choke back a sob as Mark leans cowed and presses a gentle kiss to forehead before doing the same your nose and cheeks until finally, his mouth is hovering over yours.
Once your lips meet, a flame ignites in your chest. the same feeling you get every time you kiss him: like it’s the first time.
A spark of electricity shoots through body when his hands move to cup the back of your neck, bringing you closer to him. Because that’s all he wants to be. Closer, closer, closer…
The passion and love in the kiss had been a somewhat rare occurrence lately, it’s both relieving and overwhelming to experience it once again. The good kind of overwhelming though, the type that makes your toes curl and excitement bubble in your chest.
You both are panting heavily when you eventually pull away for much needed oxygen. His forehead pressed against yours causing your pants to mix with his. He gives you one last peck and turns to the bouquet of flowers sitting next to you on the bench.
The flowers that were a dim color just moments ago, fading into the background, getting lost in the darkness of the night were now practically glowing in Mark’s hand. A ring of gold surrounds them as he holds them out to you.
“He gave me these for you.” He passes the bouquet to your hands, as you take it, an object falls from the bouquet into Mark’s open hand. He looks at the object curiously, before smiling widely. He holds it up for you to see.
Between his fingers is a ring, a simple gold band with a small diamond as decoration. You look back at mark with a confused and bewildered look. He brings it up to your face. “Look closer.”
You gasp at what you see. Inside the band written in a beautiful cursive font were the words. ‘The Rain’.
“Oh my god.” A chuckle of disbelief leaves you as you say the words, Mark nods and steps forward, the bouquet being the only things keeping you two apart.
“Let’s do it,” He says, you know what he means by the look in his eyes. So pure and so in love. The prophecy was right. “Let’s get married.”
You search his face for any other emotions and find nothing. Your heart clenches at the realization that right now it’s just you, mark and his love. Which he is willing to give to you for the rest of time if you let him. And you will. You do.
You drop the bouquet on to the bench and pull Mark into a tight hug. Your hands grip his shirt as you bury your head in his chest, the wet material rubbing your face. “Let’s.”
You can practically hear him smile, you break the hug a few seconds later so he can slip the ring on your finger. It fits perfectly, like you knew it would. The embrace is resumed right after, his face falls into your neck and happy tears and excited laughter rumbles through both your bodies. You feel him bring you closer so that every surface of your body is touching his.
Chest to chest, hip to hip as the rain falls around you, creating, unbeknownst to her, something truly, unmistakably amazing.
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