#and I’m confident in them now being able to break out of the ‘loop��� or leave the dark place etc.

[velvetjune]

incredible to think that Alan Wake 2’s existence itself implies that maybe it’ll be about Alan finally leaving the dark place, directly solving the cliffhanger of Alan Wake 1, but instead now Saga, Casey, Rose, Tim, Alice, and (still) Alan are in the Dark Place. Genius subversion of expectations

[bahablastplz]

Prove it: Seungmin x Reader

Kim Seungmin, your best friend, is so fucking smug all the time. You make the mistake of implying that no man can finger a girl the way they do in porn, and you make the mistake of challenging him when he tells you he can. Content: Smut Warnings: Fingering, slightly mean Seungmin, degradation WC: 1700 Read part 2 here

“Porn isn’t real.” Seungmin blinked at you from where he sat on the other end of the couch, unamused. The TV was playing something in the background, but neither of you had been paying attention for quite some time. 

“Obviously. Everyone knows that,” he says, annoyed. “Care to share why you’re bringing this up now?” 

You turn your phone around to show him the video you were watching–some girl getting fingered and enjoying it a bit too much, moans increasingly loud as she squirts and creams all over the guy’s fingers. 

“Dude, are you seriously watching porn right now?” He laughs at you, incredulous. “Watch the fucking TV at least.” 

“You’re not watching the TV,” you point out to him. Your friend has been lazily scrolling on his phone for at least 30 minutes. 

“Yeah, but I’m not watching porn while I’m supposed to be hanging out with my best friend.” 

“Fine, fine!” you say, throwing your hands up in surrender. The conversation goes quiet and you ignore the blush that crawls up your face at your friend’s words. 

“What part of that wasn’t real though?” He asks, finally breaking the silence. 

“No girl gets fingered like that and it actually feels that good,” you say. “She was obviously faking it.”

Seungmin doesn’t look up from his phone. “Maybe you’ve been hanging out with the wrong guys.” 

You scoff. “Like you would know, Kim Seungmin. I doubt you’ve ever even fingered a woman before, let alone made one squirt.”

He finally looks up from his phone, lifting a brow. “Are you implying I don’t get any?” 

“Not implying,” you say. “Just stating the obvious.” 

You and your friend have been known to tease one another relentlessly so this was nothing new. The absolutely neutral expression on Seungmin’s face, however, threw you for a loop. You find yourself backtracking, talking again way too fast and digging yourself into a deeper hole. 

“He was moving his hand way too fast!” you say. “It didn’t even look like he was even touching her clit. Yet there she was, seemingly cumming all over his hand! It just doesn’t seem real, you know?” 

“There are other erogenous zones other than the clit,” he says. He’s staring at you now. “I’m telling you, if no guy has ever made you feel that good from fingering, they’re doing it wrong.” 

“And you would do it right?” you challenge. You’re trying to fluster him–he’s simply way too calm for this conversation, and you hate being the only one who’s heart is beating way too fast. 

“I would.” He says it like it’s a fact. It pisses you off, how sure of himself he is. Seungmin, your best friend, who is seemingly nerdy and shy and quiet, who is now looking at you with all of the confidence in the world. Arousal pooled in your stomach as you thought about one fact you knew about your friend: He never took on a challenge he knew he couldn’t win. 

It has always been evident in the way he engages with his own friends. They would make bets with one another, each one more ridiculous than the next, and Seungmin would egg them on and only participate if he was sure he could do it. He would always be nonchalant about it. “I could beat you,” he would say, and they would always take the bait. As if he weren’t even trying, he would always win. That infuriating piece of knowledge, the idea of finally being able to prove him wrong is what motivates you to say what you do: 

“Prove it.” 

He lets out a small chuckle. “If you’re trying to proposition me, you’re going to have to do better than that.” 

“What?” you stutter. Once again he’s managed to get the upper-hand, noticing how embarrassed you get at his words. 

“You want me to finger you that bad? You’re going to have to ask me nicely.” 

You start to backtrack. “Who said I was–” 

“So you don’t want me to finger your pretty little cunt until you cum all over my hands? Hmm? You don’t want to squirt all over my fingers?” He says it as simply as he would if he were talking about the weather. 

You want to deny him now. You want to brush it off, tell him to fuck off, and go back to doom-scrolling and pretending to watch TV. But you don’t. 

“Hmm?” He asks again, taunting you. 

“I do,” you reply finally. 

“Then ask nicely,” he tells you. He moves closer to you on the couch, phone still in his hand. You want to pick it up and throw it across the living room. Maybe that would get a reaction out of him. 

You glance down on his phone, looking to see what he has been looking at that has got him so preoccupied and uninterested up until now. You’re surprised to see nothing but his home screen. Bingo. There was nothing all along. 

“Please,” you say, smiling sweetly at him. 

“Please what?” Now he was getting on your nerves. 

“For fuck’s sake, Seungmin! Please finger me! Please, please make me cum all over your fingers!” You cry out, exasperated. Your words are sarcastic but you get the reaction you wanted from him nonetheless; he reaches over you and grabs the waistband of your shorts, pulling them down with your panties in one swift motion. You’re left completely bare for him. 

This has now crossed over into uncharted territory. Instinctually, you close your legs. Are you really ready to show yourself completely to Seungmin just to prove a point? Just to show he’s wrong and that his cockiness in his ability to finger a girl is all for show?

“Nope,” he chides. “You wanted it so bad, you don’t get to hide from me.” His hand on your knee sends electric sparks up your body. 

Yes. Yes, you were. 

You spread your legs open wide for him, watching his face. He was seemingly unaffected by your actions, the ghost of a grin on his face. He makes a show of reaching over your body, ignoring your core completely to push two fingers past your lips. Your brows shoot up in surprise and he lets out a small breath that’s reminiscent of a laugh.

“Suck.” You do. You let your tongue swirl around the digits in your mouth, getting them nice and wet for him. You do so almost obscenely, moaning slightly at the taste of his fingers and letting spit fall down your chin. He responds by shoving them further into your mouth, pumping them in and out and eventually far down enough that you gag all over them. Your reactions are no longer for show now; he’s already managed to shut you up. 

When he pulls his fingers out of your mouth, it’s with a string of saliva. He reaches in between your legs and finally makes contact with your folds. His touches are featherlight, teasing. He’s watching the way your chest rises and falls, your labored breathing, the way you want to close your thighs again not to hide, but to finally relieve the pressure between your legs and he smirks. 

When his wet fingers dip into your hole you can hear them because you’re already soaking wet. He shallowly thrusts his fingers in and out, gathering your wetness and bringing it up to spread it across your folders. He taps your clit with his fingers, gentle and not with the intention that you need. 

“Seungmin, if you don’t stop teasing me I swear to God–” 

And he shushes you. When you go to protest once again, his fingers finally meet your clit. He rubs circles around it, rhythmic and systemic in his ministrations. He’s working you up, slow and steady until you’re completely putty in his hands. He switches between stimulating your clit and fucking his fingers up into your entrance, occasionally curling them and hitting that spongey spot that has you holding your breath.  

When your eyes meet his, the look he gives you is devious. 

He leans forward, spitting directly on your soaked pussy. You gasp. 

“Is this all you needed? Wanted to get on my last nerve so fucking bad, didn’t you baby? Did you just need my fingers to shut you up?” 

You whine at his words. When his fingers dive into your entrance again the pace he sets is brutal, thrusting into you fast and hard. The palm of his hand hits your clit every time his fingers bully into you. 

“Seung–too much,” you say. 

“Shhhh,” he tells you again. “You wanted it so fucking bad, baby. You can take it.” Your hips buck up to meet his hands and you start to pulse around him–he can tell you’re getting close. His fingers leave your entrance and attack your clit, soaking wet as he rubs furiously but with precision. It’s that motion that has you cumming so hard you’re seeing stars, possibly harder than you ever have in your entire life. The noises that come out of your mouth are not your own, they can’t be. You can’t give him that satisfaction–but you already have. 

When you come down from your high you’re glaring at him. He removes his fingers from your center and looks at you, smug, as he slips them into his mouth with a grin. 

He turns his head and scoots back down to the other end of the couch, smiling to himself as he scrolls on his phone once again. You look at him, still trying to catch your breath. 

“Yes?” He says to you. You must have been staring for a beat too long. 

“You didn’t make me squirt,” you point out. It’s a baseless accusation, a way to try to salvage your bruised ego since you both know he’s already won. 

He simply points down to his shirt which has been soaked from your orgasm; you didn’t even notice. “Told you,” he says. 

“Whatever,” you say, rolling your eyes. You pull your pants up and cross your arms, watching the TV and pretending not to care. 

“I bet that I can make you squirt all over my cock,” he says with a smile. He doesn’t look up from his phone when he speaks. 

You already know what you’re doing when you meet his eyes and say, “Prove it.”

*** A/N: Seungmin has been bias-wrecking me a little too hard as of late. This man is too fine.

Masterlist

[mueritos]

Hi! As a fellow trans dude who has recently discovered his autism at the ripe old age of 26, I can wholly sympathize with how you’re feeling right now. Everyone’s experiences are different, but from what you described we have very similar ones. I get extremely overwhelmed in loud, cramped situations to the point of losing speech, I get irritable and angry when planned events don’t adhere to my scheduled expectations, and certain frequencies (like clattering cutlery, loud drum beats through speakers, etc) make my nerves go haywire. What I can say is that you don’t have to call yourself autistic if you aren’t comfy with that, however it may help to learn and lean into autistic coping mechanisms for overstimulation (which sounds like that is happening during those social situations) like acquiring stim toys to help regulate, bring sensory dampeners like ear plugs (loop is a great company that makes ear plugs that block out certain frequencies for different situations), and listen to your body and your mind. If you can tell you’re starting to shut down, don’t force yourself to be like everyone else and stay if that isn’t what you want/can handle. It took me a long time to accept that I’m NOT like neurotypical people and i don’t have to pretend like I am just to fit in with the vibe. Do what feels best for you and your needs — no one else’s opinion is more important than that. If you find that you really do want to stay but can tell you’re shutting down, sometimes taking a break in a quiet space like a bathroom can help, and you can return after feeling better. I also highly recommend finding someone you trust in those situations who can help you leave if necessary. Whether it’s literally getting you out, or making it more socially acceptable/comfortable for you, I can personally attest to how much better it is when you can confide in someone about your needs in those moments and allowing them to assist you. Also, if it helps to know, I am not formally diagnosed as autistic for a variety of reasons, namely the things that can be denied of those with a formal diagnosis (like gender affirming care), but I have several autistic friends who have helped guide me to this conclusion and my life is much better for it. I know who I am and why I am Like This, and every day is easier knowing the ways I can actually help myself instead of questioning why I’m not like “everyone else”. I don’t need a diagnosis for that, and I’m happier this way. If you don’t want one either, that’s okay. Being autistic comes with a lot of ups and downs, but truly learning how to live with your brain and the way it works can lead you to so much light. The first time I let myself stim out of joy was a euphoric experience. I promise you that being autistic isn’t all sensory overload. I wish you all the best on this journey <3

thank you 😭 this is really sweet and really really helpful. I don't think I'm looking for a diagnosis either, mostly because I doubt most places I can get one will fully respect me or my experiences. I also don't want it to impede on getting GA care. Other than that, I feel like these symptoms have prolly been around for a long time, but it wasn't until a few years ago that I've been able to focus on them because HRT has made me have less turmoil. I guess my brain decided now was the time to start unraveling these experiences.

I relate though, and I genuinely dislike when plans are thrown off schedule or when things don't go the way I expect them to. It has made me rigid and become irritable when things change. For example, i was at a party that I was told would end at 10, except no one left, and I felt forced to stay an extra 2 hrs and I become overstimmed and silent. Other times it has happened when I already have a low social battery, and someone wants to be spontaneous and go do more social stuff.

I will say I have been focusing more on letting myself stim as well. I rock and fidget a lot more than I used to, and I rock forward quickly and sometimes shake my hands when I'm laughing (it's a lot easier to hide it when I'm laughing). Other times, I rock forward and shake my hands as I'm about to eat because i'm so excited. (I love food!!!!). It's also been in the way I process stuff, like taking things literally, delays in hearing, not being able to multi-task, being angry at being interrupted/distracted, being detail orientated, and I seek and avoid certain sensory stuff that aligns with other common autistic experiences (avoid bright lights/heavy noise, but seek pressure and low stimulation).

but I thank you for your input, it definitely makes me feel a lot better about having these experiences and also not being sure about taking on a label or not...i know self-dx is just as valid as an official diagnosis, but I can't deny these experiences and I also can't deny that autistic ways to cope with the world and with stimulation is working with me. It helps to learn about other people's experiences and compare it with mine, but also to know there are a lot of people in the same boat who are unsure or questioning :,)

[beantothemax]

Chapter Two:

Praem and Ekaterina arrive in the city of Macbergen, a city ruled by the “last great skáld of the Fjordlands”, allegedly descended from the great poets of the days of yore

The fact that this is the last guy doesn’t inspire confidence in his claim but we’re not talking about that right now

This skáld is one Joren Hamlann, and the duo need to wait a couple of days before being granted leave to come before him

The guy is fairly ornately dressed, as is the seer in his employ, who is more than happy to speak to Praem on the topic, alone at Praem’s request

A large guard-type guy is by his side, doesn’t really talk

This guy’s a little weird and a bit shady but generally seems to have some good advice

Nothing specifically relating to Praem’s ability

As their conversation draws to a close, Praem is hit with another vision

She doesn’t pass out like last time but it is enough to force her to double over

She sees the seer’s wrists have their clothes ripped from them

He is bound and gagged, and thrown into some sort of cage

He says a specific phrase that I haven’t decided on yet

Praem comes to with notably less purple mist than before, but it’s still noticeable

Tells the seer that he needs to get out of here, which he declines

Praem explains what she saw, but he sort of laughs her off

Can’t imagine visions of such clarity being true

Praem does NOT like that one, and storms off

Regroups with Ekaterina, explains the situation, and the two agree to stick around for a little longer to see if anything happens

Smash cut to a week later, nothing seems to have happened, so the two visit the skáld again to thank him for having them

Everything goes well, but the seer looks a little different

Praem asks to speak to the seer one more time (in private), which triggers a mandatory Unmask segment

Turns out that this is straight-up just a different guy. The previous guy that Praem had spoken with was arrested for treason two days prior

The skáld has been running what amounts to a sham this entire time, and the “seer” has been a bunch of different guys masquerading as one individual psychic

The original might have been the real deal (this iteration of the seer claims that he was for sure), but every subsequent one hasn’t been

Praem leaves the room, fills in Ekaterina AGAIN (I promise that she’s gonna be more in the loop from hereon out, this is a special case), and gets out

Thinking back to how the original seer might have been legit, the two formulate a scheme to break into the palace gaol

Unsurprisingly since I am woefully uncreative and cannot think of a good transition for this, this leads into…

The Second Dungeon: Palace Gaol

Yeah I’m just gonna call it that

Anyways I haven’t written a dungeon in a while so I’m feeling the rust on this

Also Praem’s story is very light on exploration. Hers is a boss-fighting rush moreso than anything else

Regardless the vibe I wanna go for with this one is like… slightly damp.

A little too poorly ventilated, a little too poorly lit, et cetera, et cetera

Rats and similar enemies abound, with the occasional guard-type enemy

Most of the cells near the entrance are empty, to give the illusion that the palace is mostly

Eventually they reach centre of the gaol and find a cell block that’s entirely full

It’s dedicated to the former “seers” who either cracked and told someone or spoke against the skáld

Their ages vary but they mostly look similar so it’s not especially surprising that the skáld was able to pull this hustle for this long

Praem and Ekaterina look around for whoever was there first and eventually find the guy

Break the lock because these two are NOT rogues. They do NOT have proficiency in Thieves’ Tools (this is a lie, Ekaterina is so so very Swashbuckler Rogue-coded but hey this ain’t dungeons and dragons)

Are about to leave until Praem stops and just. You know what. We’re gonna do a prison break for realsies.

Ekaterina gets on board pretty quickly cuz you know. None of these people are guilty of a crime.

Fifteen minutes and ten or so prison cells later, the gang is ready to leave

Would it surprise you if I told you that this is when a twist happens? Probably not.

At this moment, Skáld Hamlann enters the fray with the guard from earlier

Normally I would make this lead into a lengthy conversation but honestly there isn’t a ton to hash out here

The skáld is pissed off, says exactly what you would expect about it, Praem and Ekaterina respond with righteous anger in kind

This chapter’s pretty tropey to be honest

Hammann steps back, tells his guard to deal with the intruders, and triggers…

The Second Boss: Sir Otheann

This fight is another semi-ripoff of one from the original Octopath Traveler, this time being reminiscent of Omar from Tressa Chapter 2

Lackeys will be present but I have nothing interesting to say about them

General theme of this fight is that he is going to try his damnedest to knock you unconscious

His Boost Mode attack probably reduces Defense but I haven’t decided on that for sure

He has two actions per turn, might boost that to three at a certain point

If he doesn’t boost to three attacks, he’ll instead have an action that buffs his shield point total

Haven’t decided which one of those to go with

Regardless, this is a simpler fight.

The post-game cutscene reveals that Praem kicked ASS in this fight, regardless of how well the player actually did

It opens with Otheann being kicked into a wall, Praem holding her sword to his throat, and Ekaterina cornering the skáld

The two ask if the former seers will be able to handle revealing the skáld’s crimes to the two, which they happily oblige

Everyone leaves, with the duo regrouping with the original seer at the entrance

Turns out that this guy is for real, or so he claims

Says that he’s familiar with the idea of Praem’s ability, and that a legend regarding her has been passed down in his family for generations

He’s able to point the two to a location in the Goldlands that may be able to shed some more light on the matter

Before they leave, he says that there was something the skáld’s men took from him when he was imprisoned, and that he was supposed to give it to Praem

The three go to the palace’s vault, where they find a dagger, with a small amethyst in its hilt at the centre of an eye design

Ba-bump. A dagger with an eye design and an amethyst

Ba-bump. She’s seen that before

Ba-bump. She saw it held in her hand, sheathed into Ekaterina’s chest

It’s the dagger. It’s real.

Praem does a good job hiding the fact that she’s scared shitless, accepts the dagger with grace, and leaves

Ekaterina pauses for a moment and gets a little “…” speech bubble before leaving

The two are going to the Goldlands. It’s time.

I WAS GONNA COMMENT ON HOW MUCH I LOVED THE FACT THAT THE SKÁLD HAD LIKE SEVEN DIFFERENT PEOPLE TO IMPERSONATE ONE PSYCHIC BUT THE END PART HAS THOROUGHLY HALTED THAT TRAIN OF THOUGHT. PRAEM HAS THE DAGGER. EKATERINA’S THE ONE GETTING STABBED. I AM FEELING SOME CERTIFIED DREAD

[selfdiagnosedeyemotif]

Chapter Two (Praem):

Praem and Ekaterina arrive in the city of Macbergen, a city ruled by the “last great skáld of the Fjordlands”, allegedly descended from the great poets of the days of yore

The fact that this is the last guy doesn’t inspire confidence in his claim but we’re not talking about that right now

This skáld is one Joren Hamlann, and the duo need to wait a couple of days before being granted leave to come before him

The guy is fairly ornately dressed, as is the seer in his employ, who is more than happy to speak to Praem on the topic, alone at Praem’s request

A large guard-type guy is by his side, doesn’t really talk

This guy’s a little weird and a bit shady but generally seems to have some good advice

Nothing specifically relating to Praem’s ability

As their conversation draws to a close, Praem is hit with another vision

She doesn’t pass out like last time but it is enough to force her to double over

She sees the seer’s wrists have their clothes ripped from them

He is bound and gagged, and thrown into some sort of cage

He says a specific phrase that I haven’t decided on yet

Praem comes to with notably less purple mist than before, but it’s still noticeable

Tells the seer that he needs to get out of here, which he declines

Praem explains what she saw, but he sort of laughs her off

Can’t imagine visions of such clarity being true

Praem does NOT like that one, and storms off

Regroups with Ekaterina, explains the situation, and the two agree to stick around for a little longer to see if anything happens

Smash cut to a week later, nothing seems to have happened, so the two visit the skáld again to thank him for having them

Everything goes well, but the seer looks a little different

Praem asks to speak to the seer one more time (in private), which triggers a mandatory Unmask segment

Turns out that this is straight-up just a different guy. The previous guy that Praem had spoken with was arrested for treason two days prior

The skáld has been running what amounts to a sham this entire time, and the “seer” has been a bunch of different guys masquerading as one individual psychic

The original might have been the real deal (this iteration of the seer claims that he was for sure), but every subsequent one hasn’t been

Praem leaves the room, fills in Ekaterina AGAIN (I promise that she’s gonna be more in the loop from hereon out, this is a special case), and gets out

Thinking back to how the original seer might have been legit, the two formulate a scheme to break into the palace gaol

Unsurprisingly since I am woefully uncreative and cannot think of a good transition for this, this leads into…

The Second Dungeon: Palace Gaol

Yeah I’m just gonna call it that

Anyways I haven’t written a dungeon in a while so I’m feeling the rust on this

Also Praem’s story is very light on exploration. Hers is a boss-fighting rush moreso than anything else

Regardless the vibe I wanna go for with this one is like… slightly damp.

A little too poorly ventilated, a little too poorly lit, et cetera, et cetera

Rats and similar enemies abound, with the occasional guard-type enemy

Most of the cells near the entrance are empty, to give the illusion that the palace is mostly

Eventually they reach centre of the gaol and find a cell block that’s entirely full

It’s dedicated to the former “seers” who either cracked and told someone or spoke against the skáld

Their ages vary but they mostly look similar so it’s not especially surprising that the skáld was able to pull this hustle for this long

Praem and Ekaterina look around for whoever was there first and eventually find the guy

Break the lock because these two are NOT rogues. They do NOT have proficiency in Thieves’ Tools (this is a lie, Ekaterina is so so very Swashbuckler Rogue-coded but hey this ain’t dungeons and dragons)

Are about to leave until Praem stops and just. You know what. We’re gonna do a prison break for realsies.

Ekaterina gets on board pretty quickly cuz you know. None of these people are guilty of a crime.

Fifteen minutes and ten or so prison cells later, the gang is ready to leave

Would it surprise you if I told you that this is when a twist happens? Probably not.

At this moment, Skáld Hamlann enters the fray with the guard from earlier

Normally I would make this lead into a lengthy conversation but honestly there isn’t a ton to hash out here

The skáld is pissed off, says exactly what you would expect about it, Praem and Ekaterina respond with righteous anger in kind

This chapter’s pretty tropey to be honest

Hammann steps back, tells his guard to deal with the intruders, and triggers…

The Second Boss: Sir Otheann

This fight is another semi-ripoff of one from the original Octopath Traveler, this time being reminiscent of Omar from Tressa Chapter 2

Lackeys will be present but I have nothing interesting to say about them

General theme of this fight is that he is going to try his damnedest to knock you unconscious

His Boost Mode attack probably reduces Defense but I haven’t decided on that for sure

He has two actions per turn, might boost that to three at a certain point

If he doesn’t boost to three attacks, he’ll instead have an action that buffs his shield point total

Haven’t decided which one of those to go with

Regardless, this is a simpler fight.

The post-game cutscene reveals that Praem kicked ASS in this fight, regardless of how well the player actually did

It opens with Otheann being kicked into a wall, Praem holding her sword to his throat, and Ekaterina cornering the skáld

The two ask if the former seers will be able to handle revealing the skáld’s crimes to the two, which they happily oblige

Everyone leaves, with the duo regrouping with the original seer at the entrance

Turns out that this guy is for real, or so he claims

Says that he’s familiar with the idea of Praem’s ability, and that a legend regarding her has been passed down in his family for generations

He’s able to point the two to a location in the Goldlands that may be able to shed some more light on the matter

Before they leave, he says that there was something the skáld’s men took from him when he was imprisoned, and that he was supposed to give it to Praem

The three go to the palace’s vault, where they find a dagger, with a small amethyst in its hilt at the centre of an eye design

Ba-bump. A dagger with an eye design and an amethyst

Ba-bump. She’s seen that before

Ba-bump. She saw it held in her hand, sheathed into Ekaterina’s chest

It’s the dagger. It’s real.

Praem does a good job hiding the fact that she’s scared shitless, accepts the dagger with grace, and leaves

Ekaterina pauses for a moment and gets a little “…” speech bubble before leaving

The two are going to the Goldlands. It’s time.

[a-tale-of-2-sloths]

Day 14 - Rumble in the Jungle

Well that was certainly a night to remember, so many sounds mixed in with bouts of rain as we awoke to sunlight streaming in to our room and some rather loud rustling up above. As there is only mesh ‘windows’ with no curtains we were able to see from the bed, our heads still on the pillows exactly what was causing all the commotion. A family of white faced monkeys making their way through the tree tops on the hunt for a spot of breakfast. After watching them eat and play, it was time for spot of breakfast of our own before going on a couple of walks. We had planned to do the red trail - a big loop around the jungle that would take us past the lodges and up to the highlands with a great view out over the forest (and a bit of 3G!) Niko called his grandmother from there as she had turned 90. We would then head up the river to explore the rocky pools and mini water falls.

There was however a slight problem before our adventure began… The water had stopped working. As our treehouse was the closest to civilisation (still some 5km away!) there was a tiny bit of signal every now and then in the bedroom. So we managed to get word out to Matt who contacted the maintenance team to confirm Jesus would be with us shortly. I had every confidence that a man who could turn water to wine would have no trouble fixing a blocked pipe! After about an hour or so Jesus did a few checks before following the line deep in to the jungle.

Although we had to delay our walk, as places to sit tight and wait go, it could have been worse. We were able to sit back on our balcony, enjoy the view and listen to the sounds of the forest. And there was a sound that was cutting through the air unlike any other, a bird call louder than the rest. Could it be? Had the fate of Pura Vida struck once more? I followed the noise, eyes fixed on the branches above, hoping that the sound wouldn’t stop to give me half a chance of spotting the source. And there it was, sitting high up in a tree close enough to make out with the naked eye. A toucan! I called to Georgie who came rushing down from the tree house to have a look. It sat there long enough for us to have a look with the binoculars before flying off. Much like the first sloth, this was a creature that I really wanted to see and could finally tick off the list!

It was quite a while before Jesus returned, but we knew something must have worked as water started pouring out the taps. We thanked him for his help and in return he showed us a snake that he passed on the way! As we returned to our cabin, we could hear voices calling out in the form of Niko and Tim who had been up since 4.30am and already done the highlands walk. We invited them in for a drink and G gave them a tour of the house. Turns out our gaff was much bigger than theirs, but on the plus side they didn’t have any issues with the plumbing! After trying to force feed them something they managed to get away after confirming we’d be heading off the next day between 8-9. As time was creeping on and we still had a couple of walks, G cooked some baked eggs to set us on our way.

The red trail was our path and should take around 2 hours. Of course that doesn’t take in to account our knack for getting lost, taking photos and drink breaks. All being well it would still leave us with enough time to venture up stream for a dip and maybe see some of the wildlife that lives waterside. Our trek would take us past many of the other accommodations around the treetops and I’m very glad we had the sense to choose the closest one! I was working up a sweat just walking up the rocky terrain carrying nothing but a bit of burrito weight, it would have been a real moist maker in the heat of the day with 2 back packs! As the track twisted and turned taking us higher and higher it was clear to see why our German freundin were looking a bit knackered when they paid us a visit. We saw lots of butterflies, little birds, a variety of insects, the occasional lizard and even some little frogs hopping about. As we reached the peak of our walk we had a fantastic view across the top of the forest which stretched on for miles. If going up was a bit tricky in places, it was nothing compared to going down. The opportunities to end up on your backside were constant, either slipping on a big wet rock, rolling down a loose rock or sliding on the little rocks. But we made it! All the way around with out getting lost and still with enough time to venture onward up the river, where we spoke to Matt’s wife, Amy and gave a bit of love to MJ their dog. She said we were welcome to take a dip in the pool she was sat by, but we fancied an adventure (and still had to put our swimmers on!) so followed her suggestion of heading onward for 20 minutes or so.

We looked to return back to our treehouse although weren’t entirely sure which path to take, but luckily the Germans had also done the river walk and were making their way back so we tagged along with them. As a few spots of rain started to drip from above, I heard the call of another toucan and was able to point it out before the heavens opened. G wasn’t impressed that we got caught in the rain, despite her love of pina coladas but two toucans in one day… worth it! Once back, it was time for an alcoholic beverage on the ‘porch’ as we watched the sunset turn to fireflies dancing through the trees as the family of bats whipped around the house. It’s great being surrounded by all this nature, but I could live without the bites! G counted 13 on 1 foot alone!

As our tummies began to rumble it was time to head back in and start dinner - tuna and pasta, which went down very well after lots of walking. We had quite a bit of rum to get through and feeling brave I opted to take a short stroll in the dark to see if I could spot any wildlife. G said I had to be back within 15 minutes as sitting and drinking in the dark is one thing, but actively going out into the blackness of the night is a stretch too far! I think it’s the latest we’ve stayed up the entire trip, swapping tales and drinking rum like a couple of jungle pirates only to discover that when it came to shower time the water had stopped working again! At least the rain had cleaned us off!

G’s highlight of the day: Sitting in the dark whilst watching fireflies, drinking rum and reflecting on our adventures.

[bakeryblood]

Marked For Life

Eddie Munson x Male Reader

SFW

A young man sat in a backless rolling chair, hunched over their sketchbook as they worked on finishing up a flash sheet of florals for their boss as the bell on top of the front door to the shop rang, the jingle covered by the rock music blasting throughout the shop. It was nine in the morning on a weekday and only him and the shop owner was in at that moment, the other artists reserving themselves to come in once their usual rush hours hit.

Y/N bounced their head along to the music as he finished the spit shading and lifted up the paper off of the transfer sheet and admired it. ‘Just one more week.’ He thought to himself. He had been certified for months, had built his own machine and was more than heavily stocked up on supplies but his boss had held out on letting him take up a booth in the shop. Either telling him the same old story about the owner still not being convinced on them, shops in the neighboring cities had a tendency of poaching artists fresh or otherwise.

Breaking down the other artists set ups, answering the phone, keeping track of bookings and check outs all whilst building their portfolio. It was a thankless job but to him it was worth it, beyond worth dropping out of school to pursue the opportunity he’d been given. “Y/N! Get out here!” The shop owner Fuji was calling out to him over the music and they immediately jumped out of the chair and headed that way towards the store front, sore from sitting in that position for too long.

He leaned against the arched doorway for a moment stretching, “Yeah?” He’d expected them to ask them to go on a coffee run before the others showed up but when they opened their eyes and saw the owner leaning on the counter with an unamused look on their face and a young man with long, curly brown hair standing opposite of them with a sheet of loose leaf notebook paper out in front of them he opened his mouth again to speak.

“You didn’t hear this dude banging away on the bell?” Well, if you could’ve been honest with him no you hadn’t. The constant loud buzzing of the machines coupled with the shop music had done your ears in quite a bit. But you couldn’t respond like that. “No sir, I’m sorry about that..” Y/N made his way over, standing next to the man his age. Trying to ignore the feeling of their dark eyes as they bore into him whilst he looked at the drawing on the paper done fully in black pen with a messy signature at the top. ‘Eddie Munson’.

“Okay kid, like I was saying..” He pointed to the paper on the counter. “Even if I had anyone in the shop right now, something like this wouldn’t be in your price range.” The man had finally been able to pull his eyes off of you before scoffing lightly, a grin on his face as he did so.

“Wow, okay well first off, I’m not a kid. Secondly how do you even know my price range?” Y/N’s lips tightened into a line as he looked away from the interaction. He didn’t know whether he wanted to laugh or feel bad for them as he knew his boss well enough at this point, he didn’t like when people got an attitude with him. He was ‘too old for that shit’ as he’d put it. ‘Kid’ was the nicest thing he could be called at any given time, the guy should be happy he hadn’t been called shithead’ or something else along those lines.

The boss man watched as they pulled their folded black wallet connected to their belt loop by a chain out of their pocket and pulled a fifty dollar bill that looked like it had been through a washing machine at least five times out and slapped it on the counter confidently. “There.”

Fuji grunted as he bent down and pulled one of the thick binders out from under the table top and slid it across the counter, Y/N knew that book. It had the shop minimum flash designs in it. Your usual tiny hearts, butterflies, stars and letter work for those generic couple types who came in to get each other’s initials tattooed a week before the breakup. “The shop minimum is eighty, but that kid-” He pointed to you. “He hasn’t tattooed shit a day in his life, I’ll let him do something out of there on you for fifty.”

Eddie opened the booklet and quickly flipped through it before looking back up with a look of confusion. “Uh, no.”

“Then no deal. Come back next year and hopefully grandma gives you more birthday money next time.” He chuckled at his own shitty joke and pulled the binder back towards him to put up as the man grabbed the sheet of paper and money off the counter, effectively crumpling both before storming out of the shop. Y/N watched him disappear out the door, the tinted windows hiding them from further view.

“Hey boss man? Let me go talk to them real quick. I need a cigarette anyway.” You bounced on your feet waiting to get the okay from them before rushing out after them. Fuji rolled his eyes and motioned with his hand for you to get out. He knew you would probably grovel on your hands and knees to that kid to convince them to get something meaningless out of the booklet if it meant you could finally hit some skin.

Which was close to being true, you might’ve been inclined to beg if you thought it would be necessary. Just as you pushed open the front door and looked around the smoking area out front you saw them sitting on one of the benches dejectedly holding their drawing.

“Hey!“ Y/N jogged over and grabbed the piece of paper out of their hands, beginning to look it over more closely. “Look, my boss is supposed to leave in like..five minutes.” You checked the time on your watch before looking back down at them.

“And?”

You cursed and scrambled to pull your cigarette pack out of the back pocket of your black jeans. Your mind was racing and it was like your skin was vibrating as you thought about finally getting to do your first piece on someone. Along with the adrenaline rushing through you from what you were planning on doing. Your artist was going to kick your ass.

“So, I’ll do it.” You mumbled around the cigarette in your mouth with excitement as you took a seat next to him on the bench and went over his design. It was a beat up looking coffin with two roses on each side at the bottom with scribbled in shading, or coloring, you weren’t exactly sure.

Eddie looked at you as you talked to him about the specifics of what you knew you could get done but it was almost like he zoned out through most of it. You seemed so familiar to him, he’d thought the same thing when he saw you walk out from the backrooms. You couldn’t be younger than him if you worked here and you definitely weren’t older. But with the amount of tattoos you had already it seemed make since that you would be to have had the time to accumulate them, the black tank top that clung to you allowed him to see the countless pieces that covered your upper arms. Leading his eyes to travel to your neck and then down to the hem of the shirt, preventing him from viewing your chest piece in full.

“Hey, buddy—“ You snapped your fingers and smirked at his slightly dazed expression. “You okay? I’m not putting something on you if you’ve been drinking or anything..”

“Huh? No! I mean..no. I haven’t been drinking. It’s just..” Eddie cracked a smile in an attempt to cover his embarrassment from being caught looking at you way too hard. “I feel like I know you from somewhere? If that makes sense?”

Y/N ashed his cigarette and handed him the drawing back. “Doesn’t everyone in Hawkins know everyone else?”

“So you’ve always lived here?” Eddie watched them nod and stand up, shaking their hands out to get ready for the session, knowing how tense in them he got when holding anything for an extended amount of time.

“Since elementary school, yeah. We gotta go do paperwork before he fucks off, just pretend to pick something alright?” Eddie stood up as they tossed their cigarette butt out into the parking lot that extended out from where they had been sitting and followed them back inside. They were quick to change face before they headed back inside, the serious look on their face replaced the one of enthusiasm they had when talking about the piece of art that would soon be on his body forever.

Eddie raked his brain as he filled out the short form for the shops records, desperately trying to think of where they remember them from. School? That was definitely a possibility, seeing them in the hallway in passing, though he couldn’t imagine he wouldn’t have at least attempted to approach them. If they were even half as intimidating as they are now back then that would make more sense. Damn it! This was going to drive him crazy!

“Alright.” The owner walked out of the backrooms where Y/N was meticulously prepping their set up so he’d be able to have it completely ready and out of the way, saving more time for getting the stencil ready and then the actual tattooing process. Eddie stopped tapping his fingers on the table and stood up straight when the bearded man made his way over, snatching up the filled out form and looking it over briefly.

“Mhm..Okay.” He put it back down, taking note that ‘Eddie Munson’ was the same age as his fledgling apprentice. “Don’t fuck this up by trying anything kid, You’re lucky the door was even unlocked when you got here.” And with that he look his leave. Trusting Y/N to get him out before the other artists arrived after lunch. Perhaps he wasn’t a full fledged resident yet but this would definitely be something to tell the others about, he knew Y/N had been jumping at the chance to tattoo someone other than himself.

Eddie waited for the front door to close before rushing through the doorway to see Y/N folding Eddie’s drawing back up, the stencil finished. “Whoa, that was fast.”

“I’ve gotta be fast, the others will kill me if they find out what I’m doing..” He sighed and got up out of the chair he’d pulled up beside the booth an arm rest pulled up in front of that. “Sit. You want it on the other forearm right?” Eddie nodded and did as he was told although their back as turned as they pulled on a pair of black latex gloves. “Okay, shave it.”

“What? I didn’t have to shave last time I got one done..” Eddie looked at the little disposable razor on the metal side table where other things sat neatly laid out.

“Dude, no offense but didn’t you get those when you were like sixteen?” Actually he had been seventeen.

“So you do know me! We went to school together, right?”

Y/N rolled his eyes and made his way back over to his seat, picking up the razor and holding his free hand out to indicate he wanted him to give him his arm. “I told you. Everyone knows everyone in Hawkins..”

Eddie was beaming like a dumbass now knowing he wasn’t the only one to recognize the other person. Y/N actually clocked him a lot quicker after seeing his name on paper. His hair was a hell of a lot longer but his kitchen scratch tattoos were signature, he couldn’t forget Munson. “What happened to you? I haven’t seen you in school in..hell I don’t know how long.”

The young man looked up from the now freshly shaved arm with a perplexed expression. “You’re still in high school?”

Well damn, way to make him embarrassed about it now. Not that he had ever been proud of the fact, actually he was always very embarrassed when the topic was brought up.

“Explains a lot.”

“Yeah, like what?”

Y/N half smiled as he grabbed the transfer sheet and rolled over to dab his gloved finger in some Vaseline to rub on first. “Explains why your band is full of kids.” Ooo you— you had him there. Maybe not really, Gareth was the only one who really looked like a teenager still. All the Hellfire members would give him shit about his baby face.

“Wait wait, hold on.” Y/N looked up after laying down the stencil, hoping it was perfect despite Eddie’s mouth constantly moving. “You’ve seen my band? Like, us actually play?” His face was so bright with that smile, it made you feel silly.

“Don’t cream your pants, it’s not like there’s much other live music around here.” You peeled up the paper and looked it over letting your eyes come back up to meet his. That bastards’ face was way too close to yours! Pushing your rolling chair back with your feet to get a little distance before clearing your throat and motioning for him to make sure it was placed exactly how he wanted it.

“Oh..Yeah, looks good to me.” Eddie replied after giving it perhaps a five second look over.

“Are you sure?” Y/N pressed. This was his first tattoo ever on someone else, his first client essentially, and he didn’t want to fuck it up.

“I trust ya’ big guy.”

This was exactly why neither of them had interacted up until this point. They both had this intimidating air about them but at any give time they would have made the other embarrassed in a heartbeat. It was almost disgusting of Eddie to be relaying the mans’ earlier words as the whir of the tattoo machine began. Eddie wasn’t a fan of pain, at all, and when Y/N started to go in on the line work it successfully made his thoughts of creaming his pants retreat. “Fuck..”

Y/N stopped, pulling his hands away from his skin momentarily. “You haven’t ever had one done sober have you.”

Eddie tried and failed to hold back a chuckle before they started again. Using two of their gloves fingers to hold the skin taught as he drew on him painfully. “Nope.” He watched as Y/N’s tongue flicked out across their lip and they caught their tongue piercing between their teeth, a normal act he did when concentrating but this time it was on two things at once. Not fucking up this tattoo and not laughing.

Eddie was actually finding it pretty easy to concentrate on your face as you worked on him. Your eyes, your mouth. Fuckin’ pretty boys always got to him. “So why do this for me? Your boss said it would be expensive.”

“I don’t get paid either way, I might as well take the opportunity to do something nice for once.” Y/N dipped into the black ink in the little cap again before shifting into a better position for the shading process, he wasn’t giving him any color so it was actually going very quickly. For several minutes neither of them talked and when they did that the pain seemed to be more intense for Eddie, if you looked up at him you’d see the little muscle in his jaw clench along with his teeth and eyes until finally he had to say something to break the quiet streak.

“So Y/N, I’ve got a question.”

“Shoot.” Y/N tried to stay stoic and in the zone as he rubbed a bit of moisturizing ointment on the tattoo, hoping it could help calm the skin down some. The paler you were the more red and angry the skin tended to get he’d noticed.

“You smoke weed?” He hung his head, failing at suppressing the grin on his face so badly that it almost rivaled Eddie’s.

“Would I? With you? Never.” He tried to avoid looking at the man’s face but it was near impossible, especially when he heard him give a gasp as if you’d wounded him.

“And why is that? Don’t you think this right here is a bonding experience? You’ve marked me for life, the least I could do is repay you with something other than money.” Eddie watched you cover go to double dip, he was too distracting.

“Oh so this is intimate to you huh?” You went ahead and started going in on the finishing touches before he could reply with words, pulling a low hum from him that was drowned out by the buzz of the machine.

“Ugh! Fuck you..” He finally chirped when you stopped, pulling his arm off of the cushioned rest. He hadn’t been ready.

“You wish Munson.” You flashed him a cheeky smile as he held his arm, eyes on you. His mouth was slightly agape as if he’d heard something pornographic.

“Get your dirty little hands off that thing before you get it infected, Alcohol and then we’re done.” Dirty? Alcohol? Done?

“What the fuck, we’re done? It’s already done?” He pulled his hand off of his arm and stretched it back out in front of him, admiring your work silently. Until you grabbed your green tinted bottle of alcohol off of your station and gave it a spray. He could have killed you, he felt like you’d tried to kill him. It worse than getting the damn thing done times eleven!

“Oh no you don’t!” You dropped the bottle and quickly reached forward to grab his hands to keep him from touching it again. Once again you found yourself so close to his face, you could see every line in it as he bit his lip, looking back at you with a pained, pitiful expression.

“You did that on purpose.”

Y/N chuckled and nodded his head before they locked eyes again. “I had to. You know, disinfectant n’ all.”

“One star review, no, zero star review. ‘The cute tatted up bastard assaulted me when we were done, I demand a refund.’ That’s what I’m going to say.”

Your eyebrows shot up hearing that. It was a funny joke, but ‘cute’? That was blatant disrespect. That was hurtful. And it was flirting.

“I’m charging you full price now, two ounces of your best. Delivered.” You made sure to lean in closer as you inundated the curly haired man with certain feelings. He could smell the smoke on your breath from earlier you were so close.

“Jokes on you big guy, I can only get one ounce at a time.”

“Sounds like you need a new guy then.” Y/N let him go and immediately stood up to go retrieve the one thing he’d forgotten, a sheet of plastic wrap. Eddie was floored, perhaps even enamored. Were you some kind of jack-of-all-trades?

“You got the number for one?”

And the rest is history. Eddie wasn’t smooth by any means, but he had successfully gotten both a hot man’s phone number and some new ink. And in the end he made sure to promise to only come to them from here on out, with more money next time.

[kaveehs]

ih my gof your gojo x introvert reader…I LOVED IT!! are yuo willing to write like a first date hc or an argument hc with them ? sorry if you aren’t taking requests atm, feel free to turn this down!

thank you so much! i really like the idea of gojo on a first date and requests as of right now are open! i appreciate your request <3

𝗙𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝗗𝗮𝘁𝗲 — 𝗚𝗼𝗷𝗼 𝗦𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘂

♫ NOW PLAYING…

. . . NO ONE KNOWS — BRENT FAIYAZ:

gender neutral reader, high school au, wc 500+, more playful teasing hehe, geto and shoko are mentioned, not proofread 100%

a/n: sorry if this isn’t the best, i’m kinda sick :(

Gojo was very confident when he asked you out on your first date. After all, you both had been getting to know each other pretty well even after he confessed to you. A first date was bound to happen eventually, and when you joyfully agreed to go with him, he was both happy and relieved.

His confident exterior could fool anyone, because on the inside he was nervous. He knew you would most likely say yes to going on the date, so he wasn’t too worried about that. He didn’t want to show a sign of weakness in front of you, or embarrass himself. His experience in this field was pretty minimal, so before asking you out, he went to Shoko and Getou for advice.

They both teased him relentlessly for being so worried about taking you on a date, as well as recommended a few places for him. After talking to them, he was able to decide on a place and somewhat calm his nerves.

“So, where are we going,” you ask while walking beside him. He laughed and put his hands into his pockets, looking down at you with a smirk.

“It wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you right now, would it,” he asked you.

“I guess it wouldn’t, but I’m still curious,” you fake pout, looping your arm through his so it’s hooked with his own.

“Nice try, but the only hint I’ll give you is we’re almost there,” he said as you leaned against him while groaning.

You both arrived at the destination within three minutes. The first thing you noticed was the welcoming aroma of freshly baked sweets and pastries, then how the place wasn’t overwhelmingly crowded with people. You realized how thoughtful Satoru was, looking out for both of your interests.

You had known beforehand that Satoru was a fan of sweets, so you asked him if he came here often, to which he replied with a nod. The menu was filled with appealing selections, it was hard to pick just one. Satoru noticed the concentration on your face, snickering at how focused you looked.

“There are too many options that sound good,” you mumbled, holding the menu up to your face.

“I’m treating you, so you can get as much as you want,” he replied while smiling. “There’s one that’s as sweet as you that I want you to try though.”

You stared at him, holding back a laugh from his attempt at flirting and he looked back at you with shock. “What, I saw online that that line was a good one,” he chuckled and stretched his tone.

“Never trust dating advice from online, but that was cute” you laugh, but you were grateful for him breaking the ice. This allowed conversations to flow a lot more casually, and relaxed both of your nerves.

After you and Satoru finished eating, he ordered a box of sweets to go for you. Thanking the receptionist, and confirming he’d come back again soon, he held the box for you while he walked you home. You kissed him goodbye, thanking him for the day and the pastries. You’d definitely be looking forward to your next date with him.

[deanstead]

Somebody’s Watching

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Request by danipearl16: Request- Jay has a girlfriend that nobody knows about and then they get a case where she’s being stalked and her stalker is killings women that seem to remind him of her and it turns out to be her ex-boyfriend from high school and Jay starts going downhill a little bit because he’s worried about her. Also his girlfriend is more on the younger than his side by 7 years

Word Count: 4,365

Warnings: cursing, mention of sexual assault/misconduct (non-graphic), mention of non-con touching, stalking, minor OC death, mention of injury, angst, fluff

A/N: Please beware of the triggers before you continue reading! I changed some parts to fit into the storyline but I still hope you like what I did with it! I’m pretty excited about this fic so I really really hope yall will like it! It’s my first time writing such a detailed case in so I hope it turned out well? Please hit me up and let me know what you think! Love yall!

---

You looked up from where you were sprawled on the couch, fiddling with your phone. Jay was sitting at the table, a small frown across his face as he pored over case notes.

Jay usually didn’t bring his work home with him but they’d just closed a big case and he had spent a whole week in the district. So instead of spending more time there to finish the paperwork, Jay had opted to bring it home instead.

You smiled to yourself just as Jay looked up. “Sorry babe.” He said, making a little face at the papers strewn across the table.

Chuckling, you climbed off the couch and moved towards him. You stood behind him, looping your arms around his shoulders, resting your chin on his shoulder. “I missed you.” You whispered.

Jay turned slightly, tugging you so that you now landed in his lap.

“Missed you too.” He whispered, smiling as one of his arms snaked around your waist, holding you securely to him, another hand reaching up to cup your cheek. “Sorry I’ve been busy.”

You shook your head, smiling.

You’d been dating for a while but no one else knew. Both of you had agreed to keep it on the down low, partly because of your age difference. Even though you had agreed you’d keep it quiet at least for the first few months, it had been a lot more than that and it had been going so well that you didn’t really want to purposefully invite anyone into this world that Jay and you had created for yourselves. Rather than keeping it a secret, you guys just hadn’t made the effort to tell anyone or publicize it to the world. This also meant that when he was stuck at the district, you didn’t get to see him but on such days, Jay was always mindful about checking in.

“What’s on your mind?” Jay asked.

“Just thinking I’m lucky to have you.” You responded, leaning in to try to give him a hug. Instead, Jay stroked your cheek and pressed his lips to yours. “Now, I really need to finish this.”

You laughed. “Go forth.”

---

Jay had taken a few well-deserved days of furlough, which he had mostly spent curled up with you. You didn’t have any complaints, it had been just what you both needed.

But Intelligence couldn’t catch a break. It was Jay’s first day back and now, he was already walking up to a crime scene.

Jay pushed the yellow crime scene tape upwards, letting Hailey walk through ahead of him before following behind her.

“What do we have?” Jay asked, approaching the spot where Adam and Kim were standing.

Kim turned. “Kate Whitewood, 22, stabbed multiple times.”

“She’s not in the system. No priors, nothing.” Adam added.

“No belongings on her?” Voight asked, looking around.

Adam shook his head. Jay frowned. “There’s barely any blood here.”

Kevin nodded, jogging forward to join them. “This is probably just the dump site. She must have been killed elsewhere.”

Hailey stood from where she had bent to examine the body. “She has defensive wounds on her. Maybe we’ll get lucky and find skin under her fingernails.”

Jay bent forward slightly. “What are those? Marks around her neck? We need to get her to the ME to get the exact cause of death.”

“Kim, bag her hands and get forensics to run a deluxe.” Voight said, as Kim nodded.

“My CI works this street, let me see what I can find out.” Jay said, turning away.

---

“So Kate was last seen at this bar right in town.” Hailey said, walking in and sticking a screenshot onto the board, which showed a camera view of the street outside the bar.

Kate could be seen on the image, her head turned slightly as she waved to someone, a man standing by her side. Hailey tapped the image.

“We can’t find this guy. His face is always turned away from the camera, facial recognition is out.”

Voight nodded. “Jay, have you heard from your CI?”

Jay nodded, resting slightly against Hailey’s desk, his arms crossed in front of him. “My guy says there haven’t been any deals going down. I think we can rule out drugs or gangs. Streets have been quiet ever since that big bust we did last month.”

“It was 28 degrees out last night, ME couldn’t find the exact time of death. But there were signs she was raped, signs of asphyxiation and five penetration wounds from a knife.” Kevin said, opening the file he had gotten from the medical examiner earlier.

Voight turned to Kim. “Who was she?”

Kim sighed. “Kate was a hard worker, she had just started her job as a receptionist at a dentist’s office in South Loop. Dad’s MIA, Mum’s remarried and relocated to New York so she’s living on her own.”

“Have we found who she was with last night?”

Adam nodded. “I’ve gone through her phone. Looks like she was meeting her friend Grace at the club last night.”

“We need to talk to her. I want to know about the last day of Kate’s life. Timeline. Check all sex offenders in the area. Comb her social media. Let’s go.” Voight instructed.

---

Jay knocked on the main door, glancing sideways at Hailey. The door swung open.

“Grace Archer? I’m Detective Upton, this is Detective Halstead, can we come in?” Hailey asked.

She furrowed her brows. “What’s this about?”

“You’re friends with Kate Whitewood?” Hailey asked, without directly answering her question. She nodded and without missing a beat, Hailey continued, “We need to ask you a few questions about last night.”

Grace stepped back to let them in, her face falling as she led them to the sitting room.

“I heard from her parents. The whole thing’s horrible.” Grace whispered, wrapping her hands around herself.

“Can you tell us what you remember?” Jay asked.

Grace looked up. “Kate’s boyfriend had broken up with her a few months ago, so I took her out. She needed to get out again.”

“Were you approached by anyone?” Hailey asked.

“Several.” She answered.

“Anyone that stood out?”

Grace paused, trying to recall. “Kate didn’t even really want to go. She barely looked at the guys… except…”

Hailey sat up a little. “There must have been something about this guy that she left with, something unique. We have a photo of him on the surveillance tape. Flashy?”

Grace nodded, “Yeah, he had this like... attitude… like he was hitting on us but he was making a joke of it at the same time.” She paused. “The last thing she told me was that she had a great time… I shouldn’t have forced her to come out.”

“This isn’t your fault.” Hailey leaned over and patted Grace comfortingly on the arm. “Thanks for talking to us. Please call us if you think of anything else.”

As Jay walked out of Grace’s house with Hailey, he looked at his partner. “This guy’s confident, he’s smooth and it doesn’t look like he knew Kate or Grace.”

---

For the rest of the day, the team had almost combed through the whole of Kate’s whereabouts before she had disappeared and all they had was a big fat nothing.

Jay typed a quick text to you to let you know that he wasn’t going to be able to come over tonight.

You read the text, smiling a little. Jay was busy but it was cute that he always kept you informed. You stopped walking, typing back a reply to tell him it was okay and to do what he had to do, before you kept her phone back into your pocket.

You walked along the street, the same street you walked on every night, frowning a little. You turned around, scanning the street behind you.

You could swear that it was like someone was watching you, or following you. But the street was empty. This wasn’t the first time you had had this feeling - like the little hairs on the back of your neck were standing but you had nothing to back up this feeling you had.

Holding your bag tighter against you, you pushed yourself forward, quickening your footsteps, only letting up as you passed the safety of your apartment building’s front door.

As you passed the threshold of your apartment and closed the door behind you, you pulled out your phone, staring at it for a while. Part of you wanted to call Jay, to hear his voice and have him tell you that you were just tired, imagining things. But the rational part of your brain convinced yourself that everything was okay, reminding you that Jay was so busy and deep in a case, he really shouldn’t have to worry about you.

Ultimately, you put your phone on the counter, chuckling at yourself. Maybe you really were too tired.

---

By the next morning, another body had turned up, not two streets away from the first dump site.

Jay felt an uneasy feeling spread in the pit of his stomach as he stared at the photo of the new victim that was already up on the board. They had a serial killer in Chicago and this guy’s victim type had physical characteristics that were scarily similar to you.

“Jay.” Hailey broke Jay out of his thoughts. “Emma Green, 23, strangulation marks, six stab wounds.”

Jay turned to his partner and nodded. “Did they go to the same club?”

Hailey handed Jay a file. “No, but look at what we picked up on the surveillance camera.” Jay opened the file, studying the photo.

“This is our guy isn’t it?” He pointed at a male figure who was standing next to their second victim, his face still hidden from the camera, wearing a plain cap.

“Hey guys, I might have found a link.” Kim said, walking in. “I checked the employee records and there’s a bartender that works in both clubs and he was on shift on each day our victims went missing. He’s got a prior for aggravated assault and harassment.”

“We’ll take it.” Jay said, grabbing his jacket and heading out of the district.

Hailey fell into step next to him, glancing at him. “Jay, you okay?”

Jay nodded. “Let’s just get this son of a bitch.”

They travelled the rest of the way in silence. Hailey seemed to pick up that this case was affecting Jay differently but she didn’t press further, allowing Jay to lead the way into the closed club.

“Ben Carlton?”

The bartender looked up from where he was, his eyes falling onto the police badge that was hung around Jay’s neck.

In a sudden motion, he ducked out and ran.

“Hey, stop!” Jay yelled, as both he and Hailey launched themselves after him, Hailey shooting out the front door to try to head him off.

“5021 George, I have a suspect fleeing on foot.” Jay called into his radio, sprinting after the bartender.

The bartender barely made it onto the next street before Hailey flung herself at him around the corner, rolling onto the ground as Jay pulled out his gun. “Don’t move!” He yelled, as Hailey pulled the bartender to his feet.

“Let’s go.” Jay snarled.

---

“It wasn’t me!” Ben yelled as he sat in the interrogation room, facing Jay and Hailey.

Jay sighed internally, watching Ben’s reactions and the way he was answering the questions Hailey was shooting at him.

“Those were mistakes, I didn’t do this!” He yelled again.

Jay pushed himself upright, getting up from where he was leaning against the wall and pushing the photos of the victims onto the table. “This. Look at this. We can place these girls at the bars you worked at just before they died.”

“Look.” Ben said, looking up at Jay. “I saw them but they left before I even finished my shift.”

Jay glanced at Hailey. “Who did they leave with?” Hailey asked.

Ben looked from Hailey to Jay. “Look, I don’t know the guy, he’s not a regular. But he’s white, about their age. I noticed him because he headed for them the moment that he walked in. Like he knew they were there.”

Before Jay or Hailey moved, a knock came from the door.

“You guys gotta see this.” Adam said, sticking his head in.

“Sit tight.” Jay said to Ben, following Adam outside, where Kevin was waiting as well.

Kevin handed the file to Jay. “We got another one.” Jay flipped open the file, which told him what he already feared. Another victim, of a physical type that not only matched the first two victims but also you.

Jay looked up. “His cooling off period is getting shorter. We need to get this son of a bitch.”

---

The feeling was getting a little stronger that someone had been watching you.

You glanced over your shoulder but as usual the street was empty. Maybe you needed to stop staying late.

You turned back towards the front. There were sounds of footsteps but you swallowed the lump in your throat, quickening your pace as discreetly as you could.

It definitely felt like someone was following you now. You were almost running by the time you rounded the corner, colliding with someone.

You gave a yelp of surprise.

“Y/N!”

You had collided with Jay.

You let out a breath, spinning around to look over your shoulder.

“What’s going on? You okay?” Jay’s eyes snapped from you to the empty street behind you.

You turned back to look at Jay. Now that he was standing in front of you, it didn’t seem that scary anymore - maybe you had imagined the whole thing.

You shook your head, taking one last glance behind you. “What are you doing here? You finished the case?”

Jay smiled but the smile didn’t really reach his eyes. “Just wanted to check in on you. I have to go back soon.”

You reached for his hand without saying anything and that’s how the both of you walked back to your apartment, your hand clenched securely in his, almost like the both of you had a tight bubble around you.

You could tell Jay’s mind was far away, and it was even more unlike him to come see you in the middle of a case. You knew there was something troubling him but you weren’t one to press. Jay would tell you when he felt he could or he wanted to.

Instead, you just squeezed his hand.

Almost as if you were prying him from his thoughts, Jay looked at you and smiled. He pulled you closer to him, tucking you under his arm.

“You’re okay, right?” You asked, without looking up at him, just as he escorted you to your door.

Jay turned to look at you and nodded. “I will be, once this case is over.” He leaned forward to give you a kiss. “If anything happens, you call me, okay? No matter what.”

You raised an eyebrow but nodded at him, watching him disappear into the elevator before you retreated back into your apartment.

---

Intelligence had been tirelessly chasing down leads but they now had four bodies and Voight was getting pressure to solve this quickly as well. They needed a break in this case and fast.

“Okay, let’s regroup, what do we have so far?” Voight barked.

“All four victims were raped and found with multiple stab wounds. We know he picks up his victims from bars and appears non-threatening enough that his victims are willing to leave with him.” Jay said, getting up.

Hailey headed to the board, frowning. “We dumped their phones but we weren’t able to find any connection between the victims other than their physical type.” Hailey cast a look at Jay, which Voight didn’t miss. “I think he’s working his way up to something.”

“Hey guys?” Kim spoke up as she walked back in, flipping open the file sitting on her desk. “I went back over the first murder to see if we missed anything. Look at this.”

Kim pulled in her chair, zooming into the photo. “This badge here on his jacket, it’s barely visible so we missed it the first few times. I sent it to the lab to see if they could enhance the image and this is what I got.”

Kim clicked and up popped the crest of a high school. “Look, it’s not just a general badge. Look at the year.”

“Okay, that is the crest for Lincoln High. It’s a jacket given to those who graduated that year.” Kevin said, frowning at it.

“I’ll run the list of students who graduated in that year.” Jay barked, heading straight for his desk, his fingers flying across his keyboard.

Cross-checking was the worst job ever but the moment Jay’s eyes landed on your name on the list of graduates, he pulled it together, eliminating the women, men who had moved out of state or country, until finally he only had three names on the list.

“Okay, I have a Steven Miller, Charles Shoemaker and John Marlin.” Jay finally spoke up as everyone looked up. “But only Steven Miller has priors.”

“For harassment, sexual misconduct, and attempted assault. Sarge, this has to be our guy.” Jay looked up at Voight.

“Do we have an LKA?” Voight asked.

“Already on it.” Adam said.

“Go pick him up.” Adam nodded, motioning to Kevin as they headed out.

Something was bugging Jay. Steven Miller. That name was…

Fuck.

Jay pushed back his chair, entering Voight’s office without knocking and closing the door behind him.

“Sarge.”

Voight looked up, frowning a little at the look on Jay’s face. He put down his pen and leaned back in his chair, looking up at Jay.

“I’ve heard Miller’s name before. It was bugging me, but I remember now.”

Voight sat up straighter.

“I’m seeing his ex-girlfriend.” The words slipped past Jay’s lips. “Sarge, everything makes sense now. The physical type, the way he’s building up because his actual target…” Jay trailed off.

You had told Jay about Steven just once. You hadn’t gone into detail but you had told Jay about the short period that you had been together with Steven – his need for control over all aspects of your life, how he had always been a little rough, how he hadn’t taken any form of rejection well, and how you’d ended it the day he struck you.

“Take Hailey.”

Jay was already halfway to the door.

---

You had left early today.

It had been a while since you had done such an early shift but you’d been feeling more and more uneasy while walking home at night and the news coverage on the murders that were happening at the moment didn’t help.

You didn’t need Jay to tell you that you looked exactly like those girls who had been murdered. It was clear as day.

You fiddled with the key in the lock, opening the door.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach as you registered the person standing in front of you. In your house.

“Steven.” You muttered, your voice trembling, barely registering the butt of a gun heading towards your temple before it went dark.

---

Hailey hadn’t said anything but she knew something was off.

“Jay, what’s going on?” She asked. “How do you know this girl’s the target?”

Jay didn’t answer but pressed harder on the accelerator, gripping the steering wheel so hard, his knuckles were white. The ringing tone going off through his bluetooth speaker in the car making him feel even worse.

“Jay.” Hailey said again. “I’m your partner.”

Jay glanced at her now. “She’s my girlfriend.”

Hailey’s eyebrows shot up. “I didn’t even know you were seeing someone.”

Jay let a beat of silence passed. “Miller’s her ex. I should have seen the signs, the physical type, everything, I…”

“Jay. She’ll be fine. Come on.” Hailey reassured him, as he turned his truck onto the familiar street.

“She’s still not answering.” Jay said, through gritted teeth. He’d been trying to call you since he had left the station.

Without hesitation, Jay bounded up the stairs, Hailey right behind him. From down the corridor, Jay could already tell your door was slightly ajar.

“Hang back.” Jay whispered, pulling out his service weapon.

Jay quietly approached the door. “Y/N?” He opened the door with his foot, freezing as his eyes landed on you, sitting in a chair in the middle of the room, your eyes frantic as Steven held a knife to your throat from where he stood behind you.

Jay gritted his teeth, using his foot to slam the door shut, knowing that Hailey would know what to do.

“Step away from her.” Jay growled, pointing his gun directly at Steven.

Steven smiled. “I was wondering when you’d arrive. Put that down.”

Jay grinded his teeth but didn’t move. You felt the cold blade of the knife press against your skin and inhaled sharply.

“Put. It. Down.” Steven repeated.

“Okay, okay.” Jay said, glancing at you before putting his hands above his head, disarming his gun and putting it down onto the floor.

Steven smiled again, tucking a stray hair behind your ear.

“Don’t you fucking touch her.” Jay growled.

“I don’t think you’re in a position to tell me what to do.” Steven answered.

“Jay, I’m sorry.” You whispered.

Jay looked straight at you. “It’s going to be okay. You focus on me, you hear me? I’m right here.”

“We broke up a long time ago, what the hell are you doing?” You asked. You were afraid, hell you were trembling, but this was crazy and you had to help Jay to find a way out of this.

“We wouldn’t be broken up if he hadn’t come between us.” Steven snarled, moving closer towards you, his lips almost touching your ear.

Jay growled. “Leave her alone.”

Steven looked back up at Jay again.

“What, you mean don’t do this?” Steven asked, crushing his lips against yours.

“Don’t you fucking touch her!” Jay yelled. “Is that what you did? How you forced yourself on all the other girls? What do you want, Steven? What are you trying to accomplish?”

“All I wanted was to be with Y/N! But you took her.” He spat.

“So you decided to go on a rampage?” Jay asked. You saw him twitch like he was looking for something so you started talking, as much as it made you want to gag.

“Steven, why didn’t you just talk to me?” You asked, trying to distract him.

“Talk? All you care about is him!” He yelled, lifting the knife and pointing it at Jay.

It happened in a split second.

The moment he lifted the knife, Jay yelled, “Now, Y/N!”

You threw yourself forward, covering your head with your hands as you heard the gunshots go off, just two. You weren’t sure who was shooting but you didn’t move until you heard Jay’s voice again.

“Y/N, it’s okay, it’s over.” Jay whispered.

You looked up, Jay’s face hovering above you.

“Jay…”

Jay nodded, “It’s okay, come here.”

Jay pulled his arms around you.

“He…” Jay shook his head, shielding your view of Steven’s now motionless body. “Don’t look back, come on.”

Jay tried to lead you out of the apartment, barely making it to the main door before his teammates appeared. “Jay!” Kevin called, as he spotted both of you.

Jay nodded. “Thanks.” Kevin nodded, his eyes lingering on the way Jay was holding you close to his side before making way for Jay to lead you back down to the ground floor where the ambulances were waiting.

Jay led you all the way to the waiting paramedics, not even leaving your side to get himself checked.

You weren’t hurt, not really. There was a little open cut from where Steven had pressed the blade a little too hard when he had been agitated but other than that you were fine. Well, that, and that disgusting feeling that came with remembering how Steven had pressed his lips against yours.

Voight approached you and Jay. Jay squeezed your hand. “I’ll be right back.” You smiled and nodded.

Jay and Voight talked in low voices until Voight turned to look at you. “And she’s okay?”

Jay nodded. “Yeah, she is. I just need to…”

“Do what you need to do. We’ll finish up here.” Voight said, nodding and clapping Jay on the back.

---

The paramedics had dressed the wound on the scene before Jay had brought you back to his apartment.

After getting you into a clean change of clothes and some warm food in you, you had ended up back in your favourite place in the world – on Jay’s couch, in Jay’s apartment, encircled in Jay’s arms.

You lay your head on Jay’s chest.

“So this was all because of me?” You asked in a low voice.

Jay sat up, looking at you. “What?”

“He killed all those women… because of me. I got them killed.” You whispered.

“No, no, baby.” Jay propped himself up, but didn’t let you go. “This is not your fault. Steven he… he did this, not you.”

You looked up at him. “He even… in front of you… he…” You could feel tears welling up in your eyes, you felt disgusting. He’d kissed you, he’d done it in front of Jay and he’d ruined everything.

You hadn’t said that much but Jay just tilted your chin upwards and kissed you. “Jay…”

“I’ll take it all away.” Jay whispered. “I’m sorry, I should have been there sooner.”

You shook your head, swiping away the tears that had slid down your cheeks.

Jay cupped your cheek again, pulling you into his chest. You balled your hand around his shirt, gripping at Jay.

“It’s okay, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Jay whispered.

“I’ll never let anyone touch you ever again.” He half snarled, still caressing you gently.

You leaned into his embrace, closing your eyes as the sound of Jay’s heartbeat gently lulled you back into the feeling of safety and security.

[muffindaddystyles]

Summary: Y/N's feeling icky about her body, but Harry loves her to bits and pieces, through thick and thin, in health and sick — and he always waits for her to come back to him.

TW: Body dysmorphia.

Y/N's healthy.

All she sucks in is having a sane sleeping schedule due to her UNI otherwise she eats natural goodies, cook and bake home because it comforts her more that way and she works out every evening to stay fit.

Sometimes though, she’s lazy and lacks behind which’s proper humane but deep down it effects her and her mental health more than she admits and she isn’t able to start over again – it mostly happens after her periods.

Harry loves her the way she’s.

Even if she’s clumsy, bumbling, procrastinating, overly enthusiastic to mend her life at 3 am, snotty and sloth-y in her periods, confident and positive around people, kind and loving whenever she comes to meet him, whiny and cuddly when she’s sick, jealous and grumpy with his attention not on her —- he loves her in every way possible, to rivers and to sea his love could never stutter for her ever.

He loves how she’s not overly toned, having soft squishy spots which Harry undeniably wants to admire and kiss shamelessly amount of times -- like -- her plummy pretty thighs that Harry likes to nestle his head in-between making her wriggle and squirm under his grasp, her overly cute tummy that Harry dies to pepper sweet adoring kisses and petal his lips round her belly button, everytime they’re cuddled up his bicep’s always looped her around her tummy to feel it rising up and down in calm rhythm, and oh! her tender titties, they’re actually his favourite babies and he loves to fondle them in his big calloused palms brushing his thumb over the sensitive perky nub and basks in the glittery whimpery mewls of hers.

He loves that she’s curvy and gives zero fucks if she’s skinny or not.

He thinks his baby’s perfect.

So perfect he actually feels the bubbling of devotion and affection filling to the brim of his heart’s chambers and leaking out and upon his ribs tickling him.

Y/N's his person and he worships her with his whole heart.

From some days though, she’s feeling devastatingly insecure about all her things Harry’s in love with and she has no-control over it how much she tries.

Harry’s observing that all with optimism (one of his great quality's that like a lion sly about his prey, he keeps an eye on everything but pretends otherwise). He has his intense gaze fixed on her when she’s taking a look of herself in the mirror for rather too long, running her hands down her body and practically shuddering.

He glances from over his laptop and drops everything he's doing watching her go monkies, sweating buckets and over exercising than her usual time.

He brings her closer and infront of him, pressing her to his chest and coiling his forearm around her shoulders whining a, “Baby..!” when they were brushing their teeth and despite of standing beside him and teasing him occasionally like she usually does she stuffs her face into the crest of his back and hides herself there to have minimal contact with her reflection in the mirror.

Her body dysmorphia spiking dangerously high.

“Deprived me of your cuddles. woke me up so early, granny.” She huffs lying through her teeth and how much his embrace was strong enough to keep her in place she still managed to wiggle out taking her previous cosy position, but he could feel her muscles tensing and an awkward silence falling over them.

He didn’t pry much. He wants to give her as much space as she requires to come back to him hale and hearty, as she always does and whatever happens he never forgets to remind her how much he loves her every night.

..

They were watching rom-coms on Netflix back to back with her curled up into his side with a spongy white wool knitted blanket thrown over them and his cheek was smashed atop her head popping in peanuts every now and then when out of certain she spoke pointing at the actress, “You know she got her ribs removed to get that shrinky waist.” Harry frowned at that. His face itching into disbelief and concern under the bouncing glow of telly.

He affixes his gaze down at her trying to read what’s cooking up in that genius brain of her's which isn’t being very rational and genius right now, they immediately turns soft and caring when she blinks up at him purely.

She squeaks, nose crashing against his collarbones when he scooches her up in his lap grabbing onto her knees to make her straddle his torso and he grumbles cutely when she tries not put all of her weight on him and doesn’t melts into him as his sweet lovie would used to do receiving a smack on her bum on his end.

He’s afraid that an evil version of her chomped onto his dear baby alive.

“Nothing else matters if all ye’ organs are packed safely and healthily inside you,” He tells her brushing loose frays of her hair behind her earlobe and rubs his thumb in gentle strokes over her treacly pulsing point, “Was just telling you ...” She mumbles, dotting touches on his knuckles and playing with his bare cold fingers.

It’s true, she was rambling out facts about the movie and cast out of habit because no-way she’d ever go through any surgeries to change herself to become someone she isn’t.

“Swear!” She yawps out in convincing high pitch when Harry squints down at her with his lips scrunched, one eye twitching in doing so.

“Alrighty. I believe you.” He cradles her cheeks in his palms and brings her mighty close to him to peck her cupid bow, then her bottom lip and the corners of her smiling mouth to suckle generous amount of whines from her and then kisses her lovingly – hands streaming down her spine and then resting atop her dip.

He thought she was ready to come back to him, to share her problem with him and Harry really wanted to bug in, to not let her fight her battle alone and take half of her hardships from her fretting self but guess not.

They were about to have sex when panic seeped in Y/N's eyes and her cheeks blazed up in that of embarrassment as she rushed to switch off the lamps that were the only source of light in their room.

“Moppet.” Harry sighed, knowing exactly what’s happening and she isn’t as foxy in covering it up as she’s thinking herself to be.

“Why wouldn’t y'want me t'see gorgeous self of yours?” His tone punctured and hurt, feeling useless for not knowing how to cheer her up and break her worries down. He smoothens his hands behind her to lock his arm around her waist, fingertips making grape sized indents into the flesh of her hip-bone as she streaks the tip of her nose up and down the crook of his neck, murmuring meekly against his salty skin while he hugs her warmly.

“’M just feelin’ shy.” He giggles at her response puckering his lips against her hairline to pet tiny, tiny kisses there as she fists her hands against his taught chest.

“Not somethin’ I haven’t seen before, love bug.” He blows raspberries against the underside of her jaw and their mouths meet into a messy, giggling, teeth clanking kiss when she sinks into pillows allowing him to cocoon her in his heat.

“I love you, Y/N. No matter what.”

.

The last dam breaker for them was this little get together at Sarah and Mitch's baby shower.

She matched her outfit with Harry. Cute lavender coloured little sweater blouse that was familiar to the baggy baby yarn cardigan Harry was wearing, it accentuated her curves and her bosom so prettily -- her midriff peeking from where the buttons weren’t closed and their jeans were painted (they did it themselves one Sunday when it was extra boring and inactive).

Y/N felt uncomfortable in her own clothes. A bitterness spreading inside her for herself and all she wanted was to escape away from her own skin.

She knows she’s loved and welcomed and cherished by her friends and family and the love of her life, most importantly. Then why was she feeling so icky about herself? Why everything's draining her and exhausting her?

Harry obviously could see through the gloomy tenebrous energy overshadowing her as he stood in the corner of the room grabbing the sorbet he poured in two glasses for them.

A sour guzzle of tears choking his throat and his limbs weakening letting the painful heartbreak seep into him when he watches her being fidgety and fiddling with the loops of her jeans, tugging her blouse every passing second and he’s sniffling a hiccup deep in his lungs when she shrinks into herself in dejection staring out of the window without any purpose.

Harry feels awful to startle her when he plops down beside her, coodling her closer to himself and tucks her head beneath his chin subtly and cups his palm under her jaw to make her look in eyes his eyes.

“Hi beautiful,” His tone had a saddening waver in it and his irises mossed bleak when Y/N remains unresponsive, zoning in and out of her own head feeling herself prisoned into her own invasive thoughts.

“You w'na go home darling?” He gives her a wet smile clearing his throat and blinking the stubborn moisture in his eyes away when Y/N nodded without any vivid expression.

All the way back home he denounced himself of not making her feel loved enough, to not to pest her soon about what she’s feeling and letting her slide deeper into the dark hole.

He thinks he’s a piece of shit.

.

Y/N wanted to dig the earth with her own nails and hide into it and never show her face again, she was overly ashamed of herself.

His hand was holding onto hers tightly, never letting it go as he led them through the hallway and his head perked up in confusion when she stopped them abruptly and lunged to wrap herself around him like he’s the last silver of her hope and the reason to live.

“I’m so sorry, so sorry.” There comes the first sob after ages of suffering and bottling it all in, not shocked at all he was expecting it to happen. Gently he picks her up and wraps her legs around him, keeping his support firm under her bum as she cried into his soft white t-shirt.

Carefully he sits them on the edge of the bed and tries to pry her soaky flushed face in his cradle but she refuses to show him, clutching onto his cardigan and whimpering brokenly.

“I just feel so disgusting,” Her sob scratches out of her throat and for a second he thought he heard her wrong, that her feeble crying’s playing some kind of a sick game with his heart.

“Harry do something I don’t want to feel disgusting.” But, when she pleaded helplessly a cold shiver settled in his bone marrow spreading an agonising burn in his stomach.

Gently he stirs her away from his chest to look at her, meeting their foreheads together while his thumb wiped her tears away and smoothed over her wabbly lips in profound tenderness.

“My beloved,” He whispers fondling his nose against hers and her eyes flutters into realm of calms, shaky breath falling over his lips as he brings her trembling fingertips towards them and pecks them feverishly.

“The love of me life, me heart.” He continues, “Shhh. Shh baby ‘s okay to cry but don’t tire y'self.” He hushes her when she whimpers loudly at his coy affirmation.

“I’m here with you, waiting f'you, watching y’goin’ through a stony path so I could be there to hold you whenever you trip –-,” He pets her hair, cupping the back of her neck to plant his lips bitten red from worry to her puffy damp eyelids and Y/N becomes a gooey lax of candle that’s been burning for tiring amount and finally her lover came to blew the agonising flame away putting her to peace as he coos snuggling her in his cordial embrace, “You’ve been so strong to yourself and ‘m so proud of me baby.”

“I’m always here. Never away from you, always right by y'side.” His palms bending around her ribs to smush her as intimately close as possible.

“How d'ya want your huggies babylove?” He simpers down at her darlingly, huffing out in relief seeing her relaxing -- her shoulders sinking from him massaging the knots in them.

“Tight.” She mumbles timidly. The gleam in her glossy eyes returning when Harry hugs her as she wished, squishing her in right places and not suffocating her at all – their breaths in sync chests flushed against eachother.

“I love you cuddly, and care f’you.” He kisses her on lips then goes to hug her right back.

“I love you too, Har. Thank you.” She sniffs in his woodsy scent grazing her touch up and down his back, smooching a soft kiss at his cheek.

[remcycl333]

trust. it is done

affirmations are literally such a great technique, but after a while, i do start to feel myself using them desperately. i begin thinking that if i loop my affirmations long enough, if i say them with enough force or feeling, i’ll get what i want. when really, this just isn’t true.

personally i think of affirmations more like reassurances to yourself that you have what you want. it’s a reminder that omg, sp is my boyfriend! i have my desired face! i have x amount of money! your subconscious mind knows what you want. it wants to give it to u. it does. but if you’re saying your affirmations in a way that really just reaffirms that you don’t have it, i.e. being/feeling desperate, saying them in hopes that they’ll bring you what you want, etc., then pause. and maybe take a break?

i’m definitely guilty of this. sometimes i am able to just calmly affirm, knowing that what i’m affirming is already true. but sometimes i get impatient, or i feel like it’s not working, and i start affirming on a loop, desperately trying to find the “right” affirmation, driving myself crazy trying any and every thing to make my desire manifest. and it never, ever works.

but what gets me out of it every single time is...stopping. i stop affirming. 

at the end of the day, affirming is a technique. i think there’s kinda a debate on here on whether or not that’s true. yes, affirmations are just thoughts. but if you had your desire in your 3D right now, would you be affirming for it? no. you’d have thoughts, of course, and your thoughts would obviously line up with having your desire. but, for instance, if you got back together with your sp, and you were in a happy relationship with them, six months into your relationship would you be sitting there, when really you could just be enjoying your day, saying in your mind “sp is texting me sp wants to be with me sp can’t stop thinking about me” ?? no. you wouldn’t.

so yes, at the end of the day, affirming is a technique. a helpful one, for sure! it’s gotten me a lot of success. but i’ve definitely noticed myself begin to rely on it. but i don’t know about you, but i don’t want the rest of my life to be me affirming all day every day. i want to think about other things and not feel guilty that i’m not saying my affirmations. i don’t want to feel like i’m wasting my time playing video games or reading or watching netflix that i “should be using to manifest.” cuz we’ve been manifesting our whole lives. it is supposed to be easy. and natural. we aren’t supposed to let it consume our entire lives.

so back to what i was saying earlier about how i’ve stopped saying my affirmations. i stop affirming when i feel it taking over my life. if i had my desire, i wouldn’t be affirming for it 24/7. it would just be in my life, easy and natural, and i wouldn’t be scared to death that if i stopped affirming it would go away. no. i want stability. 

it’s not “letting go” or “giving up”, it’s saying, i am so confident that this is mine that i no longer feel the need to desperately manifest it in. i know it’s coming. i trust myself. i trust that my subconscious--or the universe, as i like to refer to it--is bringing it to me right now. the change is occurring. things are shifting, even if i can’t see them, and it is coming to me. it is done. 

we talk about persisting a lot in this community. it’s one of the most important things when it comes to manifestation. and it applies here, too. in this case, persistence is continuing to trust yourself. to not feel anxious two days in and start desperately looping your affirmations again. to allow the universe/your subconscious mind to do the work. to remind yourself that there is always movement behind the scenes, and soon it’ll bleed into your reality. you don’t need to say your affirmations, or visualize, or script, or anything. you just need to trust.

the way i do this is i not only stop saying my affirmations, but i don’t allow myself to think about my desire at all. in my case, my desire is my sp. so i stop thinking about him entirely. and honestly, it sounds hard at first, but when you’re not spending your day obsessively saying your affirmations, you find it’s easy to think about other things. this is so helpful, because now i don’t even have to flip my negative thoughts. i find that i very rarely have them. it’s like saying your affirmations causes your logical mind to fight back and doubt yourself. but if you’re not saying them, this won’t happen.

so whenever i do find myself thinking about my desire, i shake my head and say “it is done.” and then i force myself to think about something else. anything else. some things i do to help keep my mind occupied is listen to music, read (though personally i definitely need to stop reading romance novels, as they make me think about--you guessed it--romance), watching youtube videos/netflix, play video games. i even like to affirm for other things that i have less resistance to. for instance i’ve been affirming a lot of physical appearance changes. things that i don’t feel like i desperately need. this is really helpful when i’m falling asleep cuz i’m so used to affirming myself to sleep, and it takes me a while to fall asleep so it was starting to be a struggle to not think about my desire. but now i can just affirm for appearance changes and not my sp. 

it can definitely be hard to stop thinking about it at first, especially if you’ve been trying to manifest it for a long time. trust me, i know. the other day i started accidentally saying my affirmations while i was playing animal crossing and i caught myself and my mind just went “i love animal crossing i love animal crossing i love animal crossing” on a loop instead until i could think of something else lol. but at least i wasn’t obsessing over my desire!

dylan james’ teachings on this are especially helpful. and he recommends that when you have a negative thought, don’t even flip it. just say “this is a powerless thought” and redirect your awareness. i really like this, because it 1) takes away the thought’s power, and 2) it says i’m so confident and i trust myself so. much. that “negative thoughts” do not even phase me. 

remind yourself that nothing can stop your manifestation. you are always manifesting correctly. and guys, if you’re reading this and you’re like “well affirmations work perfectly for me and i don’t obsess over them and i manifest everything i want easily”, then great! perfect! keep saying them! but if anything i said resonated with you, this post is for you. just relax. try this and see how much better you feel, almost immediately. 

++i started sleeping with the dylan james affirmations tracks again, and omfg i love them so much. if you’re manifesting an sp i recommend listening to them solely for the dreams it gives you about them! they’re so nice i love them. but also they obviously help build up your self concept, lol. i like them bc they give you results without you having to try at. all. all you have to do it sleep. lol. and hopefully knowing that they’re doing their magic will help you trust even more :)

as dylan james always says, manifesting is not a trying process. it’s just not. think about it--you’ve been manifesting your entire life. you never had to try. and you still don’t. 

i hope this resonated with some of y’all. i’m in no way saying this is the only way to manifest and affirmations are bad or whatever, cuz that’s not true at all. i’ve manifested and seen great results using affirmations. but at some point you gotta realize that your subconscious mind knows what you want, and you just have to give it some time and space to bring it to you. stop digging up the seed you planted. it’s coming. just trust. 

:) 

[queensoybean0724]

Succession Chapter 11 (Karl Heisenberg/female reader) Resident Evil Village fanfic

Title: Succession Chapter 11

Characters: Karl Heisenberg, female reader

Rating: NC-17 for sex and language (cunniligus, fingering, P in V, unprotected sex *wrap it up, kids*, creampie)

Summary: you discover a long lost relative has died and made you his sole beneficiary.  While flying to collect your inheritance, you crash in a village in Romania.

Author’s Note: I do not own the characters from Resident Evil Village. This is a work of fiction.  Anything remotely similar to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter 11

You and Heisenberg sat side by side against the headboard as he told you everything.  The bed sheet was pulled up to his waist while you pulled it higher, covering your nakedness.  He reached for a cigar and lighter on his nightstand, puffing and exhaling in between the story.  You kept your eyes focused forward: on your legs under the sheets, on your hands in your lap, anywhere but turning your head to look at him.

It took him almost an hour to relay everything to you.  His story started over 100 years ago when the woman you now knew as Mother Miranda lost her daughter Eva.  You listened as he told you how she discovered an unknown organism under the village known as the Megamycete.  Heisenberg stopped periodically, puffed his cigar, and asked if you wanted a break or if you had any questions.  All you could do is shake your head and bid him to keep talking.

Your heart broke hearing him talk about how Mother Miranda kidnapped him from his family and infected him with Cadou.  The name of the organism sounded familiar, then you remembered that it was the thing in the jar that Moreau had in his laboratory.  Heisenberg explained that the Cadou drastically changed an individual...either physically, mentally, metaphysically, and sometimes in every way imaginable.  He told you that the Cadou is what gave him the ability to move metal objects with his mind.  He also shared the fact that he was able to manipulate electric fields and communicate through electronics like radios, televisions, and the overhead PA system that was installed in the factory.  

He shared that the Cadou was why Moreau was trapped in the prison that is his mutated body.

Tears slid down your cheeks at the thought of Moreau being in constant pain and turmoil because this “mother,” as he lovingly called her the last time you were with him, turned him into a monster.  But your heart also ached at the thought of Karl being taken as a child, experimented on, and left alone with a family that was not his family.  You could only imagine how scared and alone he must have felt, how much he must have missed his family, and how his real family must have searched for him for years until they all eventually died off one by one.

Heisenberg came to the end of his story, stubbed his cigar out in the ashtray, and slowly turned his head to look at you.  A part of him was scared, scared that you wouldn’t believe him, or worse, that you would run as far away from him as possible.  It was a thought that tied his stomach into knots.  He had wanted you from the moment he set eyes on you and had just gotten you into his arms and into his bed...he didn’t want to lose you now.

You shifted next to him and he waited for you to rise from the bed, put your clothes back on, and demand to be taken somewhere where you could call for rescue.  He was surprised when instead you looped your arm under his and held his bicep, resting your head on his shoulder.  He sighed in relief, a slow smile spreading over his face as he lifted his hand and placed it on your outer leg, pulling your legs closer to him.

“So what do you think?” Heisenberg asked, pressing his lips into your hair.

“It’s unbelievable,” you murmured, “but then again, I’ve seen enough of this village to know that unbelievable things happen and reside here.  I should have known when I saw that thing that looked like a tree reach up and rip off the wing of the plane..”

Heisenberg furrowed his brow at your words.  A tree?  Then it dawned on him that you were referring to the mold.  He came to the conclusion that you must have looked out of the plane window and saw it strike.  He could only imagine how terrifying it was to be on a plane and experience it not only crashing, but also being the only survivor.

“The mold...the thing you saw is called the mold.  I saw it retreating back into the village after your plane crashed.  I knew if there were any survivors that Mother Miranda would find them and infect them in hopes that one would bring her daughter back into this life.  When I saw you...you looked so frightened, so fragile...and you were so beautiful.  You never know what the Cadou will do to a host, Moreau and the lycans being the disastrous part of the spectrum.  So I grabbed you, told Moreau I would kill him if he told anyone, and here you are.”

You lifted your head from his shoulder and looked up at him.  His penetrating gaze, the scars that peppered his face, his long hair that fell to his chin, and his beard...Heisenberg was incredibly handsome.  His physical body was not adversely affected by Mother Miranda’s experimentation.  And even though he didn’t tell you why he brought you here at first, you were grateful that he finally confided in you.

“Thank you,” you whispered, smiling at him, “I understand now why you brought me here and why you were so secretive.  I would never have believed you at first and automatically would have written you off as crazy.  And the bodies in the factory...you need an army to stop Miranda.  The bodies from the cemetery, the bodies from the plane crash...you need all the help you can get.  It’s...it’s tough to think of Bruce and the others being turned into mindless soldiers, but I understand why you need them…”

Heisenberg’s eyes searched yours.  His hand squeezed your leg reassuringly.  “I’m so sorry you had to see your friend like that.  I didn’t know you had gotten to know him on the plane.  To me, they were always just tools to aid me in my battle with Miranda...but they were once people.  They had families, friends...I promise you when this is over, I will put their bodies to rest.”

You nodded.  “I’ll help you...help you bury them, say a few words...convince their ghosts not to come back and haunt you for all eternity…”

He chuckled and leaned in, kissing your lips softly.  You lifted your hand and caressed his cheek, feeling the scruffiness of his beard.  A surprised groan formed in his throat as you pushed your tongue out to lick his lips.  Both of his hands lifted, cupped your face, and deepened the kiss.

The two of you sat there, kissing and making out like a pair of horny teenagers.  You released the sheet that covered your breasts and it pooled in your lap.  One of Heisenberg’s hands went around to your back, pulling you closer, as his other hand stayed pressed to your cheek.

He pulled away from the kiss, which made you whimper.  He laughed before growling playfully and moving to his knees.  Pulling the sheets off of your body, he grabbed your thighs and pulled your body forward, making you lie back on your pillow.  “Karl!” you squealed as he made quick work of spreading your legs and lying on his stomach between them.

“I’ve only briefly tasted you...now I want to devour you…” he growled.  Both of his arms wrapped under and around your legs as his lips kissed the soft skin of your inner thighs.  You sat up on your elbows, your mouth going dry and your heart beating wildly.  As you watched him kiss up and down one thigh before moving to the other, you felt your arousal accelerate.  You had been intimate before, but you had never had a man go down on you.  It had been a fantasy for a long time.  You fantasized about it over and over as you pleasured yourself.  And now, here is this mysterious, strong man between your legs, moving achingly slow towards your pussy.

“Karl…” you whispered, your thighs trembling on either side of his face.  His lips spread in a grin as he hovered over your pussy, blowing softly on your clit.  Your lips parted and you moaned loudly, arching your hips up to his mouth.  Heisenberg laughed and kissed along the flesh of your labia, his teeth gently nibbling on it.  Desire and arousal churned in your stomach and you could feel your wetness pooling out of you.

“Do you like that, doll face?” he asked, kissing around your clit, “does it feel good?”

All you could do was nod your head and move your hips.  He was mercilessly teasing you, tormenting you with his skilled mouth and never truly giving you what you wanted.

“Mmmm...you smell so good…” Heisenberg murmured, pressing the tip of his nose to your clit and nuzzling it softly.

“Karl, for fuck’s sake...please...please…” you begged, grabbing the sheets in your fists.  His gaze fixed on yours and he smiled, slowly extended his tongue, and circled around your clit.

You tossed your head back and cried out, your lower back arching off the bed.  You panted and moaned his name as his tongue curled and flicked over the swollen nub.  The pleasure that coursed through your body was unlike anything you had ever felt before.  The feel of his hands spreading your thighs wider and his fingers sinking into your skin almost drove you insane.

“Karl...Karl...oh fuck...yes...yes...don’t stop…” you whimpered.  Heisenberg chuckled softly, closing his lips around your clit and sucking.  One hand released the sheets and shot up to the headboard, grabbing onto one of the railings for dear life.  Your body undulated and gyrated on his bed as his mouth gave you pleasure beyond anything you had ever felt before.

Heisenberg became drunk with power as he looked up at you.  The way you moved and the sounds that slid past your lips made him unbelievably hard.  He found himself grinding his solid cock into the bed, desperate for friction.  Your reaction to his mouth was better than any pornographic image he had seen in his long life.  His eyes darkened as ideas flowed through his mind.  He made mental notes of all of the things he wanted to do to you right here in his bed...and all of the ways he would make you scream his name and shout your ecstasy.

He moved his right hand from your thigh to your dripping pussy.  He pulled away his mouth momentarily in order to softly caress your opening with the pads of his fingers.  You continued to moan and pant.

“I’m going to make you cum on my tongue over and over again…” Heisenberg promised, “and I’m going to shove my fingers inside of you...fingering you and tasting every part of your delicious cunt…”

Both of your hands were on the headboard railings, your body twisting amongst the sheets.  Your hips bucked uncontrollably against his face as he pushed his index and middle fingers inside of you.  His mouth went back to your clit, flicking it thoroughly as he rubbed your G-spot back and forth.

“Karl...you’re gonna make me cum...I wanna cum on your fingers...on your face...let me cum on your fucking face!!” you shouted, all manners and discretion completely thrown out of the window.  Heisenberg growled and gave you what you wanted.  His fingers pushed in and out of your wet opening noisily, the squelching sounds of your wetness audible to the both of you.  His tongue flicked your clit hard and fast and within seconds your lower back was arched completely off the bed and your orgasm shook your entire body.  You screamed his name over and over until his mouth slowly brought you back down to reality.

Aftershocks shook you as Heisenberg crawled up your body, chuckling against the skin of your stomach.  You released the railings and brought your hands to his head, tangling your fingers in his hair.

His lips met yours and you kissed him hard.  You felt his skin pressed against yours as his arms wrapped around your body and held you tight.  The sensation of your retreating orgasm followed by his strong arms made your heart surge in your chest.  You felt wanted, desired, and protected.  He had given you more pleasure than you had ever been given by any other guy or even yourself for that matter.  The connection you were feeling with him was growing...you hoped that Heisenberg felt it as well.

You wrapped your legs around his waist as he rolled his hips against your wet cunt.  His hard cock rubbed back and forth between your pussy lips, making your desire accelerate all over again.

Heisenberg’s tongue explored your mouth, sliding and nudging yours into submission.  His hands slid up your back and to your shoulders, hugging you close.  Arousal and the growing need of his body increased.  His lips kissed down your neck and to your chest, licking the thin sheen of sweat that settled on your flesh.

“Karl…” you whispered, moving one hand down along his shoulder blades as your other hand stayed tangled in his hair.  

“I love hearing your beautiful voice say my name…” he moaned, kissing down between your breasts.  You arched your hips and spread your thighs wider, aching to feel him inside of you.  Heisenberg pushed himself up on one hand while his other reached down to grab his cock.  He rubbed the tip up and down along your pussy, teasing you mercilessly.

“Karl...please fuck me again...fuck me…” you said, arching your hips higher.  You were desperate to feel him, to feel his cock stretch you out and to feel his hips hammering down against yours.

He pushed inside of you and the both of you moaned loudly.  His left hand moved up to the headboard, holding it tight as the other hand wrapped around your leg, hiking it higher up on his hip.

The feel of his hips hammering you into the bed was enough to drive you mad.  His cock pushed deeper, faster, and harder.  It was like he could no longer help himself...now that you were under him, he was possessed.

Your hands reached around to his lower back, moving up and down in time with his thrusts.  Your pussy walls clenched around his cock every time he pushed inside of you and his grunts became louder because of it.  You gripped him like a vice and he had to hold himself off from cumming too soon.  He wanted you to cum again, but this...he wanted to feel it, experience it, memorize every fucking part of your cunt.

“Y/N...oh god pussycat, you’re killing me...your fucking cunt...it’s so damn tight and wet...god dammit!!” he yelled, tossing his head back.  Looking up at him losing control and fucking you harder and desperately...you wanted to give him as much pleasure as he was giving you.

His hand released your leg and went to the back of your head, making you look down at his cock thrusting in and out of you.  His other hand pressed to the bed, gripping the sheets.  “Look at how your cunt is taking my cock...taking my cock like a good little girl…”

Your orgasm was close as you watched his hips crashing down on yours, his cock moving quickly in and out of you.  You gripped his hips and screamed his name again and again.  Heisenberg moved forcefully, the bed banging against the wall.

“Fuck, Y/N!  Fuck!!!  Oh fuck, your amazing pussy is gonna kill me!” Heisenberg shouted.  You looked up into his face, his features twisted into pleasure so primal and hedonistic.  His hair fell in his face, his mouth dropped open, and his eyes were fused to yours.

“Cum inside of me, Karl,” you begged, squeezing his cock tightly inside of you.

“OH FUCK ME!!!” he shouted, tossing his head back.  You felt him cum, his cock twitching inside of you and in seconds you came as well, your body bucking wildly, holding tight to his hips.  Heisenberg continued to curse and grunt as he pumped every drop of cum inside of you.  You trembled under him, moving your hands up his sides, down his chest and stomach, and up his back.  He released a shaky breath as he slowly lowered himself onto his elbows, burying his face into your neck.

His body rocked on top of you, still thrusting slowly.  You kissed along his shoulder and nuzzled his skin with your nose.  The feel of his hot breath on your neck and his sweat-slicked skin against yours was incredible.  You never wanted him to let you go.

Heisenberg rolled to his side, pulling you with him, his cock still inside of you.  You lifted your leg and rested it atop his hip.  His fingers slid up and down your spine, making you shudder.

“You’re amazing, Y/N,” Heisenberg whispered, his lips pressed to your forehead, “so, so amazing…”

You closed your eyes, a smile spreading across your face, as you fell asleep in his arms.

[genshin-impacted]

lost & found // Diluc x Reader (1/3)

Word Count: ~3.3k 

Notes: GN!Reader, Seelie!Reader, Diluc/Reader, what more can I say? You’re a cute seelie following Diluc around

Summary: Vaguely remembering the time when you were once human, you are a mini seelie roaming the outskirts of Mondstadt when you find Diluc and decide to follow him-- though he does his share of following you too, through the best and worst of your adventures together. 

“You’re more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren’t you,” Diluc says rather than asks you, though his fondness is clear to see. You can only do a bashful swirl in response. 

-

Alternatively: As a seelie, you’re terrible at leading Diluc towards treasure without running into hoards of hilichurls or enemies alike, but he follows you anyways. 

[Part 2]

.

.

You are a seelie. 

You aren’t quite sure what that is, but you know for a fact that the wispy reflection that you see in the lake is you. No hands, no legs, no head, no heart-- though you remember when you had all that before. You can feel yourself breathe, but you also know you would be fine without it. You touch the water and vaguely feel its coolness and register that it is wet, but you aren't sure what is touching the water or how you know what it feels like. 

You are able to fly. You rise, and you fall, and you twirl in midair, and you know you have never been able to do this until now. "This is nice," you find yourself saying, but your voice comes out garbled and high, so you stop. You suppose losing your speech is the price to pay for the power of flight.

You don't know how long you wandered until you find something familiar to you. In a land of slimes, aggressive flowers, and crystalized butterflies, it's hard for you to take everything in at once. But you can recognize a human when you see one. (It would be difficult not to. You were once human, too, if you can remember.)

The human is strikingly distinct as far as humans go. With bright red hair, the man in black leans against the tree by the lakeside and watches the water lap up against the short cliff. You don't make snap judgments, not usually, but when you see the man in black, you can't help that your first thoughts are that he looks lonely.

You float to him steadily from what you hope is outside of his sight, curious enough to approach and observe what you can of him without being seen. 

Except, the moment you fly near him, he looks directly at you. (Apparently, you glow, if the light that you shine on his face is not enough of an indicator of your bioluminescence.)

You freeze in mid-air, or as much as you can as a globby orb of light. You wait with bated breath as he watches you as intently as you watched him, and you take a glimpse at what your light has allowed you to see: bright red eyes to match his hair. (You've never seen so much red on a person. And red-red too, not just the orange-y red you've seen people with.) 

Not knowing what else to do, you decide to do a somersault. (You think if you were still a human, you’d attempt to crack a joke or start a conversation to break the ice, but alas.)

You expect him to start doing something-- anything. But the man continues to look at you, though with less of a guarded expression and more of a curious one instead. 

You almost feel offended by the strange look he gives you, but then you see his lips uplift into a small smile and you forgive him. For good measure, you twirl in the air and, when he simply follows you with his eyes, you circle around his head like a halo.

"You're a different type of seelie, aren't you?" He says, his arms still crossed when you fly down to smush your face against the red gem at his collar and the Vision at his waist. You loop around his legs and try to lift his fur-lined coattails, only for him to lift it up himself and shoot you a raised brow. "Did you want me to follow you?"

Follow you? You wonder, why would he want to follow you? You don't think you have anywhere to be, let alone anywhere to lead him to. 

Now how to convey that to him…

The red-head watches you as you shake yourself side-to-side in what you hope looked like the shake of a head. "Ah… That's a no, then. I see," he says. He chuckles when you chirp in joy, looping up again. 

He pushes himself off the tree and walks on the path, toward the mansion in the distance. You follow closely behind him. A few steps in, he turns to you-- and you almost feel bashful enough to droop in height.

"Are you following me on purpose?" He asks.

You swirl up and eagerly bob your head. You wish you could ask, but the only thing you can do is trill-- which seems to do the trick when you hear the man huff in amusement before beginning to walk again. "Well, hurry up then," he says, and you chirp once before speeding up to catch to him in record-speed flying. 

(If you accidentally crash into his back at your eagerness, you think the shake of his shoulders in his laughter is only good signs of the beginning of a friendship.)

.

.

.

You hope the man you’ve decided to follow doesn't mind that all you can do is trill and twirl in the air. You make for a poor partner in conversation, considering you cannot supply the words to respond, but you think he at least finds you amusing at least if the small smile on his face is anything of note. You think he looks rather charming like that, as opposed to his straight-faced somberness when he was alone. Very mysterious, you think to yourself, must be popular.

When you follow him and see groves of grapevines and a mansion of formidable size, you think perhaps his rugged handsomeness and broodingly mysterious nature aren’t his only charm points. 

(You wonder if you can eat. You press where you think your mouth should be onto a bunch of grapes only to be disappointed by a lack of action. 

"What are you doing?" The man's voice calls out to you, amusement laced into his words. You turn around and speed back to him, feigning innocence.) 

The two of you enter the confines of Dawn Winery-- or so you read from a sign. You watch curiously as your mysterious man waves his hand in greeting when a few maids bow respectfully and follow him into the back where a man waits by a wheelbarrow.

"Master Diluc," the man says, and you are elated to finally put a name to a face you've followed for a while now. The winery employee looks past him at you, and you instinctively hedge closer to Diluc, almost hiding behind his hair. "Is that… a seelie?"

"So it seems," Diluc replies, crossing his arms. He takes a look at you. "Though it has yet to guide me anywhere."

You let out an extended squeak of indignance that makes him laugh, uncrossing his arms before he turns back to the worker at hand to discuss business. 

You'll show him, you think huffily. You can guide him somewhere-- it's in your bones (metaphorically). You found him, didn't you? You reason, surely there is something innately Seelie about you that will lead him somewhere.

Most seelies, as you have learned from watching Diluc follow the larger blue seelies, guide people to a treasure chest or some kind of monetary reward for leading them back to their seelie courts. You wonder if they are programmed to know where they are supposed to go and if there is a natural pull to a certain place. You wonder if it's anything like your wandering curiosity similar to that of a child, hoping to see what lies ahead and barreling forth. 

Either way, you take the lead and Diluc follows you out into Teyvat.

And he follows you right into enemy territory.

The first time feels like an accident, and after Diluc destroys the encampment, he finds a box of artifacts as a reward for his battle prowess. (You've never seen so much burnt grass.) The second time you guide him into enemy territory feels like a coincidence. They were next to each other, and hey, Diluc is able to find an exquisite chest this time filled to the brim with mora.

The third time around, it is hard to argue otherwise.

"You're more of a radar for trouble than treasure, aren't you," Diluc comments, settling down onto a log as you (metaphorically) bury your head into your hands. To convey such emotion as a seelie, you droop to the ground as flat as you could possibly be at his feet.

"I'm kidding," he says, watching with quipped lips as you rise from the ground moodily. "We did get some treasure out of it, so it wasn't a total loss." He reaches out with his hand to gently brush over your front as he would a cat-- and you react as a cat would, preening into his hand. He lets out a huff of laughter. "Affectionate, aren't you?"

You do a bashful swirl.

.

.

.

You realize soon enough that most people would not call Diluc private or stoic. Charming, a man with a way with his words, succinct, and pleasant are only a few things you've heard people say about him. And you were right-- he is a popular man if the eyes that follow him and the dreamy sighs that come after he leaves is of any indication.

The mysteriously cool Diluc you meet on the first day is vastly different from the man that everyone else interacts with on a day to day basis. He's not charming all the time, but he has a way about him that exudes confidence and almost an elitist composure. In some ways, you are glad-- you don't have to hide away behind his collar or in his hair (you still do this, if you're honest, just because his hair is so fluffy), afraid to mar his pristine reputation as a local bad boy. And in other ways, you are a bit smug, to know a side of Diluc that he shows to very few people.

Kaeya is one of those few people you have seen Diluc act anything less than amicable towards. 

"I was hoping one day you would have someone at your side but I have to admit, Master Diluc," Kaeya says, propping his face on his hand in amusement, "this is not quite what I imagined."

You let out a titter of laughter at the difference between the two men's expressions as Kaeya pokes at your little translucent ears. Kaeya looks at you with mesmerizing amusement as Diluc glares at Kaeya over his wiped-clean glass like he would like to do nothing else but break it over the other's head. ("It wouldn't hurt that much," Kaeya tells you flippantly. "Not as much as the hangovers his drinks give me.")

"Don't you have somewhere better to be?"

"Not really, no." Kaeya replies, feigning hurt, "Why, don't want me here?"

"Never."

Kaeya gives you a pointed look akin to a puppy. "His words are colder than my Vision, mini seelie," he says to you. "Careful not to get frostbite now."

"You have the privilege of having earned my ire," Diluc says shortly. "Also," he slaps Kaeya on the back of his hand when he goes to pull at your ears, "stop that."

"Protective, aren't you?" Kaeya chuckles, watching as you gaze up at Diluc adoringly. "I think you're one phrase away from telling me to get my own mini seelie."

At this, you let out a long coo, flying up to bop Kaeya gently on his nose before going over to Diliuc and rubbing your face onto his cheeks. You hear Diluc let out another breath of laughter, and you feel his hand press you closer to him. “Are you comforting me?” He asks in amusement, and for once, he does not berate Kaeya for joining in with his laughter. 

“The pair the two of you make,” Kaeya drawls, picking up his glass of Death After Noon. “You’d fight wars for each other, wouldn’t you?”

Of course you would, you think, though there was very little you could do as a seelie-- and you forget that at times. 

To be fair, most of the time, Diluc didn’t seem to treat you any less than his traveling companion. You’re only reminded when you float on your own when he’s cleaning up the tavern and get chased by cats and birds alike, only to come flying home to Diluc blubbering about your near-death experiences (though was it even possible for you to die?). And when you try to, in attempts to help Diluc out, scold a rowdy customer into behaving by slamming your body into their face rapidly without doing any damage whatsoever.   

The two of you-- Seelie and Uncrowned King of Mondstadt-- were a pair of renown. (“Two peas in a pod,” Venti would say the first time you led Diluc to him at Starsnatch Cliff, and “always together like bread and butter,” he said to you two the second time you find him near Starfell Lake. And “are you two following me?” when Venti walks into the tavern for the third consecutive meeting.) And if you ever doubted that Diluc cared for you, you had to look no further than when you were stolen from Diluc’s side by treasure hoarders who didn’t know any better.

It is in these moments where you are viscerally reminded that you are a seelie-- a being meant to guide people to treasures-- and not what you have been for the past few-- weeks? months? by Diluc’s side. You realize that you’ve never been hurt in this form before when you are kidnapped. It didn’t occur to you that you could feel any pain, and you wonder why not when you can feel the softness of Diluc’s hair and the warmth of his hand-- all gentle, loving gestures. Being squeezed by the treasurer hoarder’s hand feels suffocating, like your lungs being crushed under a massive, unrelenting weight.

It is not pleasant, to say the least, especially when they threaten you to take them to treasure that you know you cannot locate. 

Or can you? 

With convincing pulses of light, as though you’re approaching actual riches, you lead them where you lead people (or rather, just Diluc) best. 

The enemies of your enemies are your friends; you watch as an axed mitachurl spins around, chasing after the treasurer hunters who with varying degrees of fear, run away. They would have gotten away scot-free if they had not run into Diluc who had somehow found you before you could come back to him.

His phoenix burns bright especially in the moonless night, and Diluc takes care of two enemy camps that night. 

“Clever,” he says, making you preen, “leading them here. They really didn’t know what they signed up for when they started following you, did they?”

How did you find me? You trill, twirling around. And there should be no reasonable way for Diluc to understand what you’re trying to say, but he does anyways. 

“I just did what you usually do for me,” Diluc says, putting his hand up so you can gently land on it. Your glow illuminates his face in the softest shade of color. You watch as his lips turn up into a small smile. “I led myself to wherever the trouble was and knew I’d find you.” 

(Diluc will never tell you this for as long as you are a seelie, but the moment you do not come back to him when he finishes up his shift at Angel’s Share, his stomach drops. It shouldn’t have been hard to spot you, a glowing light, amongst the quiet, softly lit streets of Mondstadt, but he gives the city a quick lookover and cannot find you. 

He learns about the treasure hoarders from his connections and does not hesitate to take his broadsword with him and go looking for you. 

He runs into two other treasure hoarder camps and fights three groups of slimes before he finds the hilichurl camp you’ve led the hunters into, beyond relieved to see your familiar light in the distance.)

From that night, Diluc finds a mini seelie (you), sixteen anemo sigils, an old broadsword, mora, and a few treasure hunter insignias left behind. He gives you a sunsettia even though the both of you know you cannot eat, and you sit together at the edge of a cliff, watching the moon come out from its hiding place within the clouds. 

You have never felt safer.

.

.

.

You don’t really sleep, but every night you take your place by Diluc’s pillow and let time pass you by. Time feels different as a seelie, especially when you do not have Diluc to ground you to the schedule of a normal person. 

Though, if you were honest, it isn’t as though Diluc keeps regular hours himself. How many times have you bullied (read: squeaked at) him into turning in before dawn? How many times have you pressed your entire translucent body onto his face so he can take the hint to finally take a break? You vaguely remember being a human, and you think you should be abhorred by the amount of sleep Diluc isn’t taking, considering how good sleep can feel. 

On the bright side, Diluc has gotten more used to your antics that it only takes a little nagging from your end for him to turn the desk lamp off.

“You’re quite persistent,” he comments, following you with his eyes as you press your body into various spots in the ceiling above him. “I can’t tell if I’ve been blessed or cursed with you as some sort of guardian.”

Guardian seelie, you titter, spinning around with your ears outstretched as though you were an angel. Special isekai seelie, you laugh to yourself, and Diluc only watches you fondly as you float down. 

"’Stripped of all that the body once held close and the soul once held dear, song and memories are all that now remain of yesteryear,’” Diluc recites quietly as you look up to him. “‘The last singers-- the first Seelie-- they played their final tune in the halls of angels.’" 

What is that?

“It’s a song I remember hearing when I was a child,” he says, “about seelies and their origins. I don’t remember if there was anything else, but it came to me today when I was thinking of you.” You wait for him to continue as he dims the light, your glow the only thing illuminating the room other than the moon. “Most seelies want to go back to their seelie courts… but it doesn’t seem as though you want to.” He pauses. “Or is it that you don’t have a court to go back to?”

You stay silent. 

“Sorry, forget what I said. It doesn’t matter in the end anyways.” Diluc scoops you up from his lap to place you at your usual place on the other pillow by his head. You softly trill when he gently pets you, and whether you mean to or not, you glow just a bit brighter for a moment.

“Even if one day you decide to leave, the winery will always be open to you,” he says. “Adeleine and the rest of the maids will recognize you and let you in-- though I suppose the entirety of Mondstadt knows who you are by now so I guess I don’t have to worry about that, do I?” He smiles when you coo softly.

“Good night,” Diluc says to you, as he does every night, and sleeps knowing you cannot say it back in words, though he understands you regardless every time.

If you weren’t a seelie, would you have been able to be as close to Diluc as you are now? Would he still have cared about you to the extent he does now?

Even if these questions did not have the answers you wanted to hear, you think to yourself, as your heart warms (though you have no heart) from the sight of seeing Diluc’s even rise and fall of his chest, that you wish that you’d one day be able to say ‘good night’ back to him.

.

You can only watch the moon rise and dream.

[islesnucks]

hi bae can i request a barzy blurb based on dress by taylor swift? ty 🥺

a taylor swift song inspired barzy fic? hell yeah that’s like my two favorite things in the word together

requests are open so go send something if you feel like 

also this turned out a bit longer than I expected

I DON'T WANT YOU LIKE A BEST FRIEND - MAT BARZAL X READER

Word Count: 1.9 k

Warning: none

Summary: after Mat introduces you as his best friend and it affects you more than it should, you end up confessing your feelings for him 

Masterlist

Add yourself to my taglist!

His words hadn’t left your mind the whole night, they were on loop, replaying over and over in your brain. ‘This is Y/N, one of my best friends.’ That’s how Mat had introduced you when you arrived at his family’s friend’s wedding, to which he had invited you as he’s plus one.

You knew you and Mat were just friends, you have been for a long time, and it surely wasn’t the first time he introduced you like that. Maybe this time hit differently because you had just come to terms with the undeniable fact that you had fallen for your best friend, no matter how cliché that sounded.

You couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment when it happened. It just happened slowly without you even realizing. Suddenly seeing him hit on random girls at the bar made you feel sick. Suddenly his hand on your lower back guiding you through a crowded room felt different. Suddenly your name coming from his lips made the world stop. You didn’t know what turned the switch in your brain from platonic to romantic love and made you look at him with new eyes, but once you realized it there was no going back and the thought of Mat and you becoming something more was always there painfully present in the back of your head.

“Y/N?” you heard Mat call you, bringing you back to reality. You looked at him still a bit lost in your thoughts. ”Are you okay?” he asked with his eyes stuck on the windshield as he drove you home after the wedding had ended.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”

“I don’t know. You’ve been a little off all night.” He noticed, he obviously did. Because he’s Mat, he’s your best friend, he’s one of the most attentive guys you know and he knows you better than you know yourself sometimes. So he obviously noticed, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t keep on pretending.

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you replied failing to sound as confident as you wanted to. Mat didn’t say anything and the car fell back into silence. 

You looked outside the window, trying to distract yourself and calm down. You weren’t far away from your place, in just a few minutes you’d be in your apartment. Mat had noticed something but he didn’t know what it was, so you could send him a text explaining you had a headache or something to get him off your back and just move on.

At least that was the plan but then Mat turned off the car and got out of it with you. You thought he was walking you to the building door like he had done many times, nothing strange. However he walked into the building with you and got into the elevator.

That’s when you started to suspect something was happening. You looked over at him confused and he just smiled at you, like nothing was going on. So maybe he was just walking you to the door. You decided not to think too much into it because if you did your heart would start racing and would notice your nerves, the last thing you needed was to give him more reasons to believe something was going on.

As you opened the door Mat was quick to walk into your apartment and you watched him with furrowed brows as he took a seat on your couch, casually like there was nothing weird with it.

“Excuse me? Can I help you with something?” you asked, stepping in front of him.

“I know something’s up Y/N. You barely talked today and you didn’t cry, I’ve seen you cry at stupid commercials and you didn’t cry at a wedding.”

You rolled your eyes walking away from him because you knew you couldn’t lie to his face, he’d notice. “I’m fine Mat I promised I just had a headache.”

“No you didn’t. When you have a headache you massage your head and you get sleepy, that’s not what happened today. It’s more like you were gone.” You hated how much he knew you, it would be harder to convince him but that didn’t mean you wouldn’t try.

“Well I’m sorry I don’t always have the same gestures Sherlock.” you replied, irritation was clear in your tone. Mat let out a deep sigh and got up. It wasn’t his intention to argue and he could see you were getting mad, he just wanted to know what was going on.

“Y/N I know you-” he started to say as he approached you but you were tired of hearing that speech.

“Can we not do this right now? I’m tired Mat, I just wanna go to bed.” you said with a defeated look, lowering your town. He looked at you for a minute and decided to push his stubbornness aside. He knew he was right, he’d bet a million dollars on it, but he also knew you were exhausted, he could see it in your face.

Mat walked till he was in front of you, inches away, and suddenly wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. He held you tight as one hand went up to your hair to stroke it. You were surprised at first but then he felt you relax in his embrace. He placed a kiss on top of your head as he balanced slightly from one side to the other, keeping his face buried in your hair.

“You don’t have to tell me what’s going on okay? Because I know something happened, don’t even try to pretend it didn’t. I just wanna know if it’s something I did, that’s all I need to know because I can’t leave you here alone knowing I may have done something to upset you.”

His voice was soft as he spoke against you. Tears started to build up in your eyes and you tried to push them away as you debated what your next move would be.

If you told him it wasn’t about him he'd leave and you could move on pretending nothing happened and dealing with your unresolved feelings. If you told him the truth you didn’t know what would happen. However you knew that regardless of how he felt about you he’d be nice to you. The man was hugging you tight about his chest, refusing you to leave until you told him it wasn’t his fault because he wouldn’t be able to live with himself knowing he did anything to hurt you.

Maybe it was the wine you had drank. Maybe it was because you were emotionally exhausted and unable to think clearly. Or maybe because you were tired of pretending. You didn’t know the reason why you decided to be honest and tell him how you truly felt, but you did that.

“You introduced me as your best friend today, that’s why I was off the whole day, I just kept thinking about it.” you mumbled against his chest, breaking the silence.

“Did you want me to introduce you differently?” He pulled away a little to be able to look you in the face, but his arms were still around you.

“Yes- I mean no. I-” You stumbled on your words, trying to find the right way to explain everything. “What you did was fine, I am your best friend, that’s right.”

“Then why did it upset you?” You rested your head face against his chest again, not having the courage to look him in the face as you confessed what you were about to confess.

“Cause I don't want you like a best friend Mat. I haven’t for a while now and I just don’t know how to deal with this. It’s not your fault, I don’t know what happened or when or how. I have these feelings for you and I guessed it hurt a bit to hear you calling me your best friend, even though that’s exactly what I am.”

After you spoke the room went silent again and you started panicking. You looked up at Mat who was already looking down at you and all you could see was shock. Suddenly your worst fear was real, you had screwed up your friendship with him. It was over. You felt the familiar knot in your throat and tears blurred your vision.

“Sorry ignore everything I said. Just forget it okay?” you said as you freed yourself from his embrace. Still no reaction whatsoever from him. “Shit. Shit. Shit. I feel so stupid.”

“Y/N.” he said, but you were too distracted pacing around the room and rambling to hear him.

“You know I even spent hours shopping for the perfect dress that would magically make you see me as more than your friend, do you know how stupid that sound? What am I? 15 years old?”

“Y/N listen-” he tried again but there was no getting to you, you were too lost in your own jabber. It was like once you started you couldn’t stop and you’d surely later regret all you were confessing.

“I’m an idiot. I really thought you could maybe by some miracle feel the same and-”

“Y/N!” he said now in a much louder tone so you would hear him and place his hands on your sides to stop you. You were surprised, not even realizing he had approached you at some point.

“Please stop.” he added now on a lower more tender tone, it almost sounded like a plea.

Now that you looked at him the initial shock had been replaced by something you couldn’t make out. His face was unreadable as he stated leaning in and before you could even question what was going on his lips were on yours.

You were surprised at first, eyes wide open not being to process what was going on. But once the initial shock was over you kissed him back. It’s embarrassing how many times you had thought what kissing him would be like, but it turned out to be even better than you could have imagined. His lips caressed yours gently, even a bit shily. Your hands met on the back of his neck and his slid down your sides to your waist, pulling you closer. 

Then a thought found its way into your brain.

“Wait.” you mumbled against his lips and he instantly pulled away. “I need to know you’re not doing this out of pity.”

He chuckled letting his head fall back before answering. “I’m doing this because I also don’t want you like a best friend. Because you do look amazing in that dress. Because I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long now. Because-” 

Your smile grew wider with every word and your cheeks turned red. You could tell he planned to keep on going, and you were surely going to ask him to tell you the rest later, but now there was only one thing you wanted.

“Ok, ok. I get it. We can go back to kissing now.” you said making him laugh, already tugging him closer by his neck and his laughs died in your lips.

-

hope you liked it! likes and reblogs are always appreciated!

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[crimsonophelia]

Could I get a fluffy and maybe flirty Childe imagine set during his story quest? Instead of the Traveler and Paimon accompanying him, the reader (who works at the Northland Bank as one of Childe’s subordinates) gets slapped with the duty of babysitting Teucer and covering for Childe and his façade as a toy seller in Liyue.

"I must say that your brother is quite cute, sir."

"...I guess it must run in the family."

"Hm? Did you say something, comrade?"

"Oh. Um. Nothing, sir."

Of course, being the perceptive man he is, Childe heard all of what they said. What he ends up doing or saying to the reader? Seeing the magic you’ve worked when anon previously gave you the liberty of it, I leave it entirely up to you. :)

featuring: childe x gn!reader

warnings: a teeny bit suggestive at the end

published: april 27 2021

form: imagine

a/n: i’m gonna be real with you, i was stuck on ar35 for the longest time because i was too cowardly to level up my world so i finally did it today and i jumped from 35 to 41 T_T and now my enemies are stupidly strong. but anyways i just started the childe quest today so im just gonna stick to the part when they’re still in liyue and there’s no fighting wwww

“teucer, i swear to celestia-” you muttered under your breath, as the little redhead slipped from your grasp yet again, running ahead to go look at some kite vendors. “come back here, kid! otherwise you’re gonna be in a heck of a lot of trouble!” 

earlier in the day, you were out running errands for the bank, under tartaglia’s orders, when you had come across rumors of a ruin guard running amok. figuring you would use your spare time and save some local liyue citizens the trouble of having to deal with the feral robot, you defeated the machine with efficient ease. however, in the vicinity, you discovered a lone child showing great excitement at a deactivated ruin guard, jumping and leaping while calling it “mr. cyclops” with a strange elation. 

you figured the boy was snezhnayan, what with his features and clothing reminiscent of the cold climate of your homeland. but why in the world was he out by a ruin hunter all alone? he kept mentioning his brother, a toy seller in liyue, but you could think of absolutely nobody that fit that description. 

so, out of the goodness of your own heart, you decided to take the little boy-- teucer, he called himself--back to liyue harbor with you, and see if you could find this older brother of his. 

however, once you arrived back in the city, your plans were quickly derailed as the little brat seemed to have the attention span of a fruit fly, and was constantly trying to weasel his way into some other dangerous situation without you knowing. 

“god dammit teucer”, you huffed, trying to keep up with the child. who let children have so much energy? your age must finally be catching up to you, you thought. “how about we go back to northland bank? you might like it there” you thought taking him back to your headquarters would stall the boy for enough time for you to find someone who might know the whereabouts of teucer’s brother. there weren’t too many snezhnayans in liyue--whoever his brother is, he can’t be far.

the little boy looked up at you with his big, blue puppy eyes, but you knew his act by now. “no buts, kid. if you’re lucky, we’ll be able to track down you’re brother there.” he sighed, relenting to your orders and following you back to northland bank.

the two of you climbed up the stairwell leading to the entrance of the bank on the second floor, teucer clearly dejected and pouting like a baby. exhausted, you pushed open the doors that you were so familiar with, and ushered the child inside.

much to your surprise, you see tartaglia talking with ekaterina in the lobby. it had been quite a while since you had seen your superior in person, and the surprise certainly was not unwelcome. sometimes you couldn’t stand the man’s smug attitude, yet there was something in his rogueish charisma that you simple couldnt deny attracted you to him.

teucer also seemed to be excited by this sighting of the red-headed harbinger, the little boy’s eyes lighting up with unbridled excitement.

“brother!”

wait. was tartaglia the older brother teucer had been talking about all along?

childe turned around, distracted by teucer’s voice, and upon seeing the little boy, his eyes lit up—first with surprise, then with confusion.

“teucer? what the heck are you doing here in liyue?”

he left the fatui agent with a befuddled look upon her face, and ran towards the child. teucer jumped up into his brother’s broad arms, and they grasped each other in a tight hug, like they had not seen each other for at least an eternity.

ruffling teucer’s hair, tartaglia softened, with an expression unlike anything you had really seen him wear before. he really must care about his family, you thought to yourself.

“so you’re the older brother this little tyke has been talking nonstop about”, you teased tartaglia, elbowing him in his side. “you know, he’s thrown me for a loop this entire day. i didnt think babysitting was part of the job requirement.”

the red-head chuckled abashedly, scratching his head. “sorry about that, [y/n]. the little guy can’t seem to bear being away from his favorite big brother.”

teucer laughed. he truly looked so happy to be with tartaglia again, which made you wonder what the harbinger was like when not on the job. you had known him to be a ruthless war machine, a hedonistic killer who thrived off of the rush battle and bloodshed gave him. childe could take down a dozen men, twice his size, in a matter of minutes, hardly breaking a sweat. yet seeing him interact with teucer, almost a little mini-sized version of himself, his gentleness and care surprised you. perhaps there was more to the man than you had initially thought.

teucer finally detaching himself from tartaglia, looked up at his brother with those same puppy eyes, now full of admiration. “are you here to sell toys to the liyue children, too?”, the child asked. toys? what toys could he possibly be referring to? you and ekaterina, both, looked at childe with confusion.

tartaglia stuttered for a moment. “oh! uhh— yes! yes i am! i was just talking with the nice lady, ms. ekaterina, on how many toys we can sell to all the children in liyue!” he responded, hardly missing a beat. did teucer not know what childe’s actual occupation was?

“wow! my brother really is the coolest person ever!” teucer leaped up and down, hanging onto tartaglia’s pantlegs. looking at this young, untainted innocence, you begun to understand why childe might try and shield the child from the truth.

childe detached the excitable child from his clothing, and beckoned ekaterina over. “ms. ekaterina, would you do me the grand favor of watching teucer for the rest of the day? i’d hate to burden our friend [y/n] after they have already brought him to liyue from celestia-knows-where.” he turns to teucer, telling him “big brother ajax is going to sell many, many toys now! so you need to behave yourself when i’m gone, okay? miss ekaterina will be watching you, and she’s very nice.” he pinches his brother’s cheek, teasing him lightly, and ushering him away with the fatui agent.

it’s now just you and tartaglia in the bank, as the sun was setting and all the other employees had gone home for the day. you heaved a sigh of relief, glad to be rid of baby-sitting duty, after having to deal with teucer’s antics for several hours now.

“i’m really sorry about all of that. i had no idea he would be coming, as a stowaway, no less.” the man looked at you with genuine gratitude. “i don’t want to imagine what might’ve happened to the little brat if you hadn’t been there.”

you chuckled, not quite used to seeing such sincerity coming from the harbinger. most of the time, you had been accustomed to his charismatic facade that he puts on when he becomes childe, the eleventh and one of the most dangerous members of the fatui harbingers.

“don’t worry, it really was no problem. your brother is certainly a handful, but undeniably adorable”, you said, mindlessly gathering your belongings again as you prepared to head out again. “he takes after his older brother quite a bit, i must say.”

“come again?” childe looked behind him, eyebrow cocked.

“oh— nothing. i didnt say anything”, you muttered. shit. you really need to get better at keeping your mouth shut. you refused to be known as the insolent fool with the puppy-love crush on the goddamn eleventh fatui harbinger.

“oh? that didnt really sound like nothing, my dear [y/n].” he smirked. whenever he called you “my dear”, you knew you were in for major teasing. he was definitely having fun with this. he strode towards you innocently, with that usual swagger of his, that tinted everything he did. his walk, his talk, his appearance all oozed confidence, and it was utterly intoxicating.

tartaglia now looked at you with a glint in his eye, the same look he gave enemies before he was about to utterly obliterate them. it was frightening, yet terribly alluring, and you despised how much you fell for it.

suddenly, you felt your back hit the cold, marble wall. you hadn’t even realized that tartaglia had cornered you against a gold pillar, his mere presence forcing you to unconsciously move away from him as he approached you, calculatedly. a lump growing in your throat, you couldn’t bring yourself to even utter a single word in defense, only feeling your cheeks grow hotter and your legs grow weaker.

tartaglia leaned his arm against the pillar, dangerously close to your head, effectively propping himself up with only you between him. you were far too aware of the space—or rather, the lack thereof—separating the two of you, the man’s hot breath audible in the dead, echoing silence of the golden bank.

tartaglia smirked, bringing his face close to yours. “you flatter me greatly, [y/n].” smirking, his breath grazed against your neck, his stare burning into your flesh. the way your name sounded on his lips made your breath hitched in your throat. too hot, you felt way too hot. it was impossible for a hydro user to make you feel such unbearable heat.

“seems as if your clever words aren’t of any use to you now, hmm?” you could feel the mans lips brushing against your jaw, each touch against you leaving a stinging trail. he brought his free hand to caress your own, fingers clasping yours as if you were made of a delicate porcelain, the finest kind liyue had to offer. slowly, as if dragging out each second as long as he could, tartaglia brought your hand to his lips, and planted a long, slow kiss to the back of your palm.

your eyes widened at the sheer eroticism with which he kissed your hand—an act commonly of etiquette somehow being much more lustful, even debauched when tartaglia did it. all you could feel was where his lips met your hand, the phantom burn it left, the slight string of saliva connecting his lips to your hand as he left it, the dark gaze in his eyes as he looked back up at you, clearly aware of how vulnerable you were in his grasp.

“thank you again, my dear. i hope we can continue to work together in the future.”

a/n: jesus christ this got really horny at the end LMFAO anyways i hope you like it! its kinda long but wtv

[stuckybarton]

Sucker For Pain i

SUMMARY: You were new to the team, but what everyone didn't know was you weren't so new to the God of Mischief. CHARACTERS: Loki Laufeyson x Ex!Reader [Ex to Lovers again?] WARNINGS: Profanities. Suggestive Themes. Slight Angst and horrible self-image. Grammar Mistakes. English not being my first language. [Not Beta’d tho] WORDS: 2,956 CHAPTERS: [1/3] A/N; Life happened and yeah, didn’t have much time to write. Not my best work for this mini-series, but I’m fighting through for this. Hope you guys enjoy~

PART TWO | PART THREE

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"Agent Y/N Y/L/N." You introduced yourself the first moment you were escorted into the compound by Director Nick Fury. Multiple sets of faces both new and old had come to greet you. For a moment you wouldn't even believe that this is was the new life you would find yourself to be a part of from now on.

Years in the job for SHIELD before disappearing off the grid to get as much information about HYDRA, everyone had thought you had betrayed them and you had accepted that they would think so lowly of you after all the near-deaths you had to endure on the job. Even with the mission becoming more of a death wish, you had accepted the role Nick had given you all those years ago and now you were rewarded, immensely. A spot on the Avengers as part of the Earth's Mightiest Heroes.

The familiar face of Nat was the first to greet you with a hug. A fiercely tight one, it had been so long since you've seen a friend. Then your eyes fell towards the rest of the team; Bucky Barnes, who you had a few close encounters with during your time with HYDRA. You had witness everything they had done to him and stood on trail to clean his name. Steve Rogers, who, with Sharon Carter, had assisted in guarding Steve while SHIELD was still under HYDRA's control. But among the familiar faces, one stood out the most.

Loki Laufeyson.

To many, the man was a snake, a God that had once brought death and destruction in New York. But to you, he was different, this was the man that you had spent your lonely nights with while under the guise of a traitor. It had once just been a physically thing between the two of you, neither wanting to know about each other's lives. You knew he was a God, a man that had wronged the world, but he had never known about you, the woman that had painted yourself as a traitor for the better of the world. The one that had been called every name on the book for the sake of making sure you did your part right.

Then it got serious between the two of you. Admission of love was told between both of your lips. But it was dangerous for you two to be together especially when you were already told by Fury that you can come back to the surface. You didn't know what side he was on, and you did not have the heart to make him choose if the time would come.

So you two parted. A month ago. The pain still throbbing you like an unattended bullet hole right through your heart. It was still so painful to look at him and not remember him crumbling on his knees begging you to stay. The first sob that escaped his lips and forever haunted your dreams. A never-ending loop in the back of your head as your demons screamed at you for breaking an already broken man.

"I for one am happy you're finally here. Another woman to add to an already Man's Man world in the compound." Nat teased glancing towards the other individuals that had come to know the new face. "With introductions out of the way, you've got a lot of explaining to do for the past few years."

You could only smile at your friend. You did have so much to explain to her, things had been murky between you and Clint, but after everything, Nat had refused to believe you would betray them, betray her, and it was finally a relief to be able to return back home, seeing the people that mean the most to you.

"Tell me about it." You muttered allowing Nat to quickly pull your away from the crowd, but it missed your eyes how he was still looking. Ice blue eyes a contract to the burning gaze he had towards you.

Forget about him. Forget about him. You were here for a new opportunity. No him. Never him.

For the next few weeks, everyone had grown to accept you in your new role as part of the Avengers. You kept up with Steve, Bucky, and Sam during their runs. Sam more than happy to finally have someone that had the same pace as him, but only for you to laugh and out run him just to get a reaction out of the high flier. Tony and Bruce had also found a kinship in you, having provided them enough information about HYDRA's experiments and location made most of their missions easier. Then there was Nat and Clint, your confidant in this new life. Every single moment that was not dedicated to a mission was spent with them; may it be movie night or a simple get together outside the compound, often times bringing Wanda and Vision along just to mess with you and call you a 5th wheel of the group.

But among number of members on the team, everyone had noticed you constantly avoided one Thor Odinson and one Loki Laufeyson. The only real time you would even dare talk to either of the brothers would be during training--other than that, you tried your best to avoid them, Loki most especially. Every single moment that would force the two of you to be in the same room, Loki had a glare while you tried your best to avoid his gaze.

Everyone noticed, everyone didn't seem to worry too much. It comes with having a former-villain part of the team. They thought you would eventually get used to the God's presence just as much as they did.

"You ever gonna tell me what's going on between you and Loki?" Nat inquired avoiding your punch.

What you hated the most about sparring with Nat was her capability of multitasking. Talking and snooping about someone else's business while also kicking their ass in the process--this was the predicament you were in right in this very moment.

"Nothing is going on." You muttered landing back first on the mat after being thrown like a rag doll by Nat. Eyes looking at the ceiling, you wondered if it was a good idea to actually come clean to her about her past with the God of Mischief. "I know what he's done to New York and I think you can't blame me for taking precaution when it comes to him."

Nat now comes hovering on top of you, the narrowed eyes and gentle smirk was all you needed to know--she knew it was bullshit. But when she had stopped pushing you for more information, it was enough for you to just change the subject.

"They found Dominic?" You inquired. One of the first big missions that everyone was focusing on was one of the leading Scientist for HYDRA. With the exposure of HYDRA to the world, some of them had moved away and found themselves in much shadier company, much to everyone's radar now spiking.

Dominic Wagner was, in part, partially responsible for the Winter Soldier program in the modern era. One of the pioneers in moving the project into a much younger sets of test subjects. You lost contact with the man as soon as your got back into the surface, but it had also meant a target was on your back when they found out you were a double agent.

"He's in Russia. Wasting away all the funding for the program with parties" Nat points out. "Still a better way to spend the money that abducting kids everywhere."

You nodded, memories of files upon files for the prospects still haunted you to this day.

"When are you taking him out?" You inquired. In your time with the SHIELD, the red in both of your ledger had made you two a hot commodity if the situation present itself as shoot to kill. Neither of you would hesitate. You knew you would now, after everything, but if it means one less bad people in this earth, you would swallow your new morals.

"Fury wants him alive." She pointed out finally standing back up to her own two feet, leaving you on your back, staring at the ceiling in deep thought. "I know as much as you do, we want him dead for everything he has done, but we need him alive so we can get the others."

You nodded, this was one of the few things you had to get used to as part of the team. Death was best solution in SHIELD--at least in your team, not here. As long as you were part of Steve's team, you would need to choose whether or not killing would be the best option. Hope that you weren't so blessed to be given in your time under.

"I get a first shot when we don''t have any use of him anymore." You muttered finally standing back up with Nat's help. Steps faltering at the sight of the God of Mischief, training with the likes of Peter Parker, Sam Wilson, and Bucky Barnes. A weird mix up, but wasn't hard to understand why.

"Why don't you shoot your shots with him for now." Nat teased, finally making you break from staring at the plain black shirt and green sweatshort-clad Loki Laufeyson. "If we try to ignore the death count during his attack, he is sort-of your type in men." Nat wiggled her brows. quick to avoid you as you attempted to swat her in the ass, eyes now turned away from God and his training partners.

"By type, you mean psychotic with possible Daddy-issue? Then you might just be right." You snort.

"I'm offended you think of me as such, Darling"

Jerking your head to the owner of the voice, how the hell did he sneak up behind you without you noticing. You glanced at Nat in panic and like the traitor that she was, made a terrible excuse of being needed in Bruce's lab. Now being left in the man's presence, you could all but remember the last time you had been this close to the man.

Heartbreaks.

Words that you didn't mean.

Words that he didn't mean.

It still hurt you, and you were sure it hurts him just as much, if not more now, finally realizing why there had been a need for a breakup between the two of them all those weeks ago.

"Here I thought I would have someone to trust. You mortals continue to disappoint me." He hissed.

Your eyes glanced at the other training trio, noticing all three of them were in their own little world to even noticed what was going on between the two of them.

"Tell me, Darling..." He whispered, head leaning towards the shell of your ears. The familiar shiver run through your skin as just his voice. Memories of the very things his silver tongue had whispered had you flustered and breathless, more than from your earlier training with Nat. "Was it satisfying to play with a God?"

Before you could even mutter a word, his constantly gentle hand now covered your jaw, emitting a squeak from your lips and stopping you from saying a word. He was never this forceful, nor did he do anything that would hurt you. Was this the true nature of the man you had finally thought you have been the best part of you. To have loved a man that everyone was right to stay away from?

"Or is it shame finally coming to you, to be ever involved with someone like me?"

You tried to pry his hand away from you, but he was too strong--stronger than you could ever think of being.

"Or is this you taking your opportunity to move from one bed to another? Who will it be this time, Y/N? My oaf of a brother or will it be Soldier out of time? Who will you whore this time?"

And you finally snapped. With a resounding slap, all three individuals had heard your attack on the man and Loki finally releasing his hold on your jaws. A chuckle escaped his lips and only brought the first line of tears to fall from your eyes. You never wanted to believe him to be a monster, but here he was, proving her wrong.

"I am in doubt of the foundation of our relationship for the past years, Y/N. I am the God of Mischief and Lies and the only mortal I had ever truly opened to had done this to me. Lied to me for such a long time, lied about the entirety of our relationship."

"You will never understand."

"Oh no," he chuckled darkly, eyes glaring straight into your own. "I understand well enough to know, you would never love someone like me and I deserve every lie and heartache I am enduring because of everything I have ever done in my past."

Before you could defend yourself and the genuinity of your relationship with the God, he had made his excuse. Leaving you to ponder of the true damage of your breakup with Loki, and the aftermath it had now held for the both of you. He was right, you had lied, and either way, their relationship will fall apart because of those lies.

He was the God of Mischief and Lies.

Yet, he did not expect for this biggest lie to break him the most. The separation had been painful, he had always hoped for a better life with you. Then a month passed since your breakup, he sees you, it hits him like a sharp knife to the chest all over again. He experience the pain of a stab to the chest, but it would never compare to the pain of seeing you in this very compound with the truth of your life that you refused to ever open to him.

This was karma coming to haunt him it seems.

It had been well over a week now since the first time he had actually confronted you about everything. It wasn't how he planned for things to go through. He never wanted to hurt you, but he was a monster after all. A monster that his own father had told his people to avoid. A bedtime story to scare mischievous kids into submission.

He had always thought after everything he had to endure, had to do, had to escape, he could finally live a peaceful life. A life to finally start anew. A life where he could finally change for the best. A mortal woman had made him make those ideas come into reality, you had always became the reason why he would never have his redemption in life.

A bitter idea with no possible resolution.

How could he have ever believed that anyone would ever love someone like him? After everything he had ever done, he was never allowed to be loved. You had proved that somehow.

'Mr. Laufeyson, you are needed for a meeting with the team'

Breaking from his little bubble. He sighed finally returning back to reality, into the little comforts the library could give him. The week had been gruelling for him, three individual witnessed the altercation between himself and you. It had spread like wildfire, but thanking the Gods that no one was able to listen to the conversation.

He had to endure most of the questioning. In everyone's eyes, he was, after all, still under everyone's constant scrutiny. A man that no one could trust. But he refused to say a single word knowing you did the same thing. It was better to keep your mouth shut instead of letting people know exactly what had happened. Somehow that brought a smile on his face. He might not share a future with you, but might as well make the most out of making your life a living hell, as much you did it to him.

Shutting the book he was barely even reading, he placed the book back into the shelf before walking his way towards the meeting room.

He could easily teleport, but he preferred to enjoy his moments of peace without his oaf of a brother breathing down his neck or Stark constantly testing his patience with his quips. It also gave him a moment to school his features, he knew well enough about the mission to know you would also be in attendance. Be more invested in this mission than anyone else.

It was a few things he was relearning about you now that you were out in the open as everyone claims you to be. You were a free spirited being that could meld with anyone you were in the area with. He had watched you throw relentless jabs at Tony during your first few days that had the man surprisingly raise a white flag. But the most dangerous thing he had to learn was the familial relationship you had with one Natasha Romanoff and Clint Burton, two people that he kept his distance with the most.

"Professor Snape has finally graced us with his presence."

Loki has learned since joining the team to choose his battle when it comes to Tony. This was one of those moment. Finding a vacant chair besides his brother, he had taken his seat. A big mistake on his part as he finds from across the table, you sat. In between a glaring Romanoff and Barton.

Wearing a smirk, just to get on the two super spies' nerve, he turned his attention right back into the meeting. He begins formulating a few little schemes to not only get on the two's nerved, but most especially yours.