#and I think for me. for kas. there is no shame in falling is similar. something that's grown into and becomes powerful through that

[diredeliverance]

Despite not going oathbreaker with Kas I cannot imagine BG3 without the oathbreaker knight because "if you stumble, know there is no shame in falling" is one of those game quotes that lives in my head absolutely rent free.

[goddess-of-geeks]

Grace and Power pt. 1

Reunion

This would be so much better if I came up with a name for this fic.

A/N: This is in fact not the first time I wrote a reader insert but it is in fact the most work i’ve ever put into one.

Warnings: None

Word count: 2100

You opened the flap to the tent that would temporarily house retired General Iroh, Prince Zuko and Commander Zhao. When you entered you saw two guards blocking the exit from Zuko and his Uncle with two spears.

You and Zuko locked eyes, an emotion that can only be described as shock graced his features. You gave him a tight lipped smile before looking towards your commanding officer, Zhao.

“Commander Zhao,” You said, making Iroh and the formerly mentioned look your way. You noticed a similar look of shock on Iroh’s face. “We interrogated the crew as you instructed. They confirmed Prince Zuko had the Avatar in their custody, but let him escape.”

“Now remind me,” Zhao grinned before walking up to stand behind Zuko, whose face morphed from shock to hurt and betrayal. You looked down at the ground, you hoped that you following orders wouldn’t ruin your short lived reunion. “How exactly was your ship damaged.”

Zuko looked down in defeat.

Prince Zuko and Iroh were seated across from Commander Zhao who was standing in front of his desk.

You and another guard were standing behind the young prince.

“So,” Zhao began, “A twelve-year-old boy bested you and your firebenders.”

“Wait, the avatar is twelve? You’ve spent the last, nearly three years looking for a twelve year old boy.” You said looking at the prince.

Zuko nodded in response. You looked up and pondered on that thought for a moment before mumbling to yourself.

“And I thought I had nothing better to do with my life.”

Zhao cleared his throat drawing your attention towards him.

“My apologies, sir.” You said bowing towards him.

“You’re more pathetic than I thought.” Zhao continued as if nothing happened.

You looked up at Zhao. You never understood how a man could be so cruel to a child.You knew you hated Zhao when you saw the twisted smirk that was on his face when Ozai burnt Zuko.

Zuko spoke up, “I underestimated him once, but it will not happen again.”

Zhao turned his back to the prince before stating, “No, it will not, because you won't have a second chance.”

When Zuko spoke up again he sounded almost frightened, “Zhao, I’ve been hunting the Avatar for two years and I-”

Before the price could finish his sentence Zhao turned on him hottily, flames erupting from his hand as he swept it in an arc from left to right.

“And you failed.” He finished for the prince. “Capturing the Avatar is too important to leave in a teenager's hands.” You don't understand why Zhao used that as an excuse. He watched with his own two eyes as you took on ten of his men, with nothing but a katana, during one of his training exercises.

“He’s mine now.” Zhao finished his sentence.

Zuko threw himself at Zhao in frustration and anger. You and the guard beside restrained him. While he was struggling in your grips you were rolling your eyes.

“Zuko calm down, you don't wanna do anything you might regret.” You said to him.

He ignored you, causing you to roll your eyes again.

Before Zhao could leave the tent he turned to you and the guard, Zuko still struggling in your grasps, “Keep them in here.” You and the Guard nodded.

When Zhao left Zuko gave a demonstration of his anger by kicking the table stationed next to Iroh. You and the other Guard let go oh his arms soon after.

Zuko turned to you, fire in his eyes, finger hitting you in the chest accusingly, “How could you.” He practically spat in your face.

You didn’t flinch, “How could I what?” You questioned, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked towards the prince. “Do my job?” You asked further.

Zuko crossed his arms over his chest and scoffed at your words, “Job.” He said in a sour tone. “You’re a year younger than me. How could you possibly have a place in the military.”

Iroh watched the whole interaction calmly, with a fond expression on his face. Remembering the good old days when you two would fight and argue.

“It’s not like I had a say in the matter. Zhao saved my life, sadly I’m in debt to him.”

Zuko crossed his arms and turned away from you in a huff.

Iroh stood up before walking over to you and placing his hand on your shoulder, “I am very enlightened to see you again Y/N. We should celebrate. How about some more tea!” He exclaimed. Zuko rolled his eyes, and you had a fond look on your face. You missed these two so much.

After an undetermined amount of time Zhao finally re-enters the tent.

Zuko and Iroh were seated in chairs facing one another.

“My search party is ready.” Zhao said addressing Iroh and Zuko.

“Once I’m out at sea, my guards will escort you back to your ship and you’ll be free to go.” Zhao said.

“Why? Are you worried I’m going to try and stop you?” Zuko retorted.

You felt like your eyes were gonna fall out of their sockets if you kept rolling them so much.

Zhao laughed, “You? Stop me? Impossible.”

Zuko stood up from his seat, “Don't underestimate me, Zhao. I will capture the Avatar before you.”

“Prince Zuko, that's enough!,” Iroh said standing as well.

“You can't compete with me. I have hundreds of warships under my command, and you... you're just a banished prince. No home. No allies. Your own father doesn't even want you.” 

You couldn’t believe anyone would dare utter such things to royalty, banished, yes, but still royalty nonetheless.

“You're wrong. Once Zuko delivers the Avatar to his father, Ozai will welcome him home with honor and restore his rightful place on the throne.”

You didn’t even know what you were saying, the words just began to spew out of your mouth, and you had no control over it.

Zhao turned on you, his face red with anger. 

“You’ve only been here two weeks, what makes you think you have the right to speak to a Commander in such a way.” Zhao growled at you.

You opened your mouth to retort but he cut you off.

“If Fire Lord Ozai really wanted him home, he'd have let him return by now, Avatar or no Avatar, but in his eyes the so-called “Prince Zuko” is a failure and a disgrace to the Fire Nation.”

You tried to speak up once more, but his time Zuko cut you off. You swear you were gonna stab someone.

“That's not true.” Zuko said.

Zhao turned to Zuko with a nasty face, “You have the scar to prove it.”

Zuko launched himself and the commander and you made no attempt to stop him. 

“Maybe you'd like one to match!” He shouted in his face.

“Is that a challenge?” the commander questioned.

“An Agni Kai. At sunset.” Zuko said.

You froze. Yeah you wanted someone to put Zhao in his place but you didn't want Zuko to fight in another Agni Ka, considering what happened at the last one.

“Very well. It's a shame your father won't be here to watch me humiliate you. I guess your uncle and your little girlfriend will do.” Zhao said smugly.

Zhao turned to walk out of the tent, he stopped and looked at you before saying,”Your actions will cause you to suffer major consequences. I hope you are ready to face them after you have to watch the prince face another devastating defeat.”

Zhao finally left the tent. You were glaring daggers at the spot he was previously standing.

Iroh walked up to Zuko “Prince Zuko, have you forgotten what happened last time you dueled a master?”

“I will never forget.” Zuko responded. 

Iroh, Zuko, Zhao and You were in a Fire Nation Arena. Zhao and Zuko were kneeling, backs facing one another, preparing for battle. Zhao had 4 of his men in attendance, whilst Zuko only had you and Iroh but that was enough.

“Remember your fire bending basics, Prince Zuko.” Iroh said, “They are your greatest weapon.”

Zuko stood up, “I refuse to let him win.”

His shoulder wrap fell to the ground. You swept your eyes over his muscular figure. 

A small piece of your heart shattered at the realization that Zuko was no longer that sweet 13 year boy old you knew all those years ago.

Zhao stands and turns, his shoulder wrap falling off his shoulders, as well.

“This will be over quickly.” Zhao stated.

Atop the gate a gong sounds. Both men face each other and assume firebending stances. 

Zuko fires the first shot which passes harmlessly to Zhao's left. He fires again, this time it passes without effect to Zhao's right. Zuko fires several more, the last of which Zhao blocks, satisfaction evident on his face. Frustrated and losing control of his breath, Zuko moves towards the commander, unleashing more fire from both his hands and feet. Zhao dodges and blocks them all. Zhao then crouches forward and shoots flame at a point on the ground close in front of him. 

From the corner of your eyes you saw Iroh watching anxiously.

“Basics, Zuko! Break his root!” You heard the retired General exclaim.

Zhao fires many blasts of flames, alternating between his fists. Zuko blocks each, but is slowly forced back. On the last strike Zhao uses both hands, knocking Zuko over and sending him skidding backwards in the dirt.

You hold in your breath hoping he’s okay.

 Zhao takes a flying jump at Zuko. Zhao lands as he tries to get up, but he isn't fast enough. Zhao fires right at him. Zuko rolls out of the way just in time, and as he is getting up sweeps Zhao's feet out from under him. 

You finally exhale the breath, your chest gently rising and falling.

Zuko lands on his feet, a slight smile appears on his face. Zuko walks towards Zhao, using his feet to produce small waves of flame that rush toward his opponent. Zhao is caught off balance and wobbles slowly backward. 

Iroh clenched his fist in an expression of hope, a smile beginning to spread over his face. 

Zuko finally lays Zhao out flat on the ground with a blast of fire. Zuko rushes up to him, prepared to deal the final blow. 

“Do it!” Zhao yells.

Zuko releases a blast that shoots to the side of Zhaos’ face.

“That's it? Your father raised a coward.” He sneered at Zuko.

“Next time you get in my way, I promise I won't hold back.” Zuko said.

He turned his back on the pathetic Commander and began to walk away.

You took notice of how Zhao got up and shouted in anger. He unleashed a wip of flame at Zuko. You stepped in before the flames could hit the princes back. The fire coming from Zhaos’ foot is extinguished as your gloved hand closed over his foot.

You gave the commander a nasty look. “After this horrendous display of you being a sour loser,” You said in a sweet tone, “I have decided to tender in my resignation.” You finished dropping his foot causing him to stumble and land on his butt.

Iroh and Zuko appeared to be frozen in time for a moment before Zuko rounded on Zhao.

You turned and placed your hand on Zukos’ chest, and looked him in the eye. He looked down at you.

“Don’t.” You said in a hushed tone.

Yould see the moment's hesitation in his eyes before he slapped your hand off of his chest and continued advancing toward the Commander.

“No, Prince Zuko.” Iroh said after he witnessed your failed attempt to stop the angered Prince. “Do not taint your victory.”

Iroh turned to face Zhao, a look of disdain on his face.

“So this is how the great Commander Zhao acts in defeat. Disgraceful.”

“I wholeheartedly agree.” You chimed.

“Even in exile my nephew is more honorable than you.” 

Zuko looked at Iroh in surprise at his statement.

“Thanks again for the tea. It was delicious.” Iroh said finally to the Commander

Iroh moved to leave, You and Zuko followed closely behind. With burning anger, Zhao watches them exit the gate of the arena.

Outside, Zuko quietly asked Iroh,”Did you really mean that, Uncle?”

Iroh slyly stated, “Of course. I told you ginseng tea is my favorite.”

You couldn’t help but snort at his declaration. Sending you into a full laughing fit followed soon by Iroh and eventually Zuko, as the three of you walked towards the harbor.

~~~

And that’s the end... for now.

Master List

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[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Drev Conlang (Current)

Important Sounds

Ж = zh   (Azure)

Ц = ts    (rats)

 Rules

Conjugations

If the verb stem ends in a consonant

i

ash

ish

eesh

ich

aж

 Hastat = to walk

Hasti = I walk

Hastash = we walk

Hastish = you walk

Hasteesh =you all walk

Hastich = he she it walks

Hastaж = they walk 

 If the verb stem ends in a vowel

ik/ki

nash

sh

neesh

ch

ж

 Adjective Endings

An = adjective ending where the noun ends in a vowel (Dead gender)

Een = adjective ending where noun ends in a consonant (Living gender)

To make something  Loud - louder add the opposite ending to the end of the word

Gran = big granan= bigger Graneen = biggest

Adverb endings

Dee

Tee 

Possession

Kee = added to the end of a noun 

Gender

Nevermind no gender

Word order

Subject  verb  predict   I the dog see

Adverbs go before verbs       I the dog slowly ran-towards

Adjectives go before nouns    I big dog ran-towards

Prepositions NOT postpositions  I around the big dog ran

Plurals

to make a word plural just repeat the last syllable the second time   жyaka = animal жyakaka

or repeat the word from the last vowel                             dжal = drev s  dжalal = drev pl

if the word is short just double it      Lhus = tree   Lhusus = trees/ forest

Tense

Past                   da

Present

Future              ta

Add these before the verb, if there is none present, it is assumed that you are speaking in the present

Alphabet

T

tch

Kah

Eh or e 

I

D

Sh

S

A

Ee

K

Ch

Z

L

Uh

G

Ts   ц

Zh      ж

ya

ha

N

Ng

r

Zha

J

 Current words

Extras

Jee = not ( it is not)

Ha =towards = added at the front of a motion verb

Na = away from = added towards the front of a motion verb

Neh = reverses a word. (similar to not but has to be tacked onto an adjective)

 Pronouns

 zha = I

tsа = you

 Nee/na = he/ she / it use either living or the dead to match the noun that goes with it

Jya= we/us

tsana = you all

 Dazha = they/them

 zhаk = My/ mine

tsаk = your/ yours

Neek/nak = his hers her it its

Jyak = ours

tsanak = all yours

Dazhак = they/ theirs

Zhazhe = myself

Tsatse = yourself

  Nouns

Dzhal = Drev

 Dzhalzheen = soldiers/ footmen/ warrior

 Dzhalak = drevling

 Dzhalka = kit/ baby

Dzhatal = city 

Dzhtalka village

Dzhatatal = house/ home

Dzaga = body

Dinar = fire

Daeen = here/there

Daleest = ambush/ surprise

Dargranla = volcano 

Dadik = soemthing 

Dazhit = disgrace (also an insult like calling someone a bitch) 

Deeng = food

zhankeel = honor

zhyaka = animal

zheeng = war

Zhin = battle / conflict

Zhineech = battle pair/ married couple

Zhit = hate

Zheedazh = sibbling

Zhjea = sacrifice 

 Lata = rock

Lana = help 

Latinar = ash 

Latahag = armor

Luhs= tree (has the same u sound as in the name Gus)

Luhsuhs = trees / but in this case also means forest, they make no distinction

Ladinar = lava

Luhsad = branch 

Lachi = focus 

Latinash = cynder wind 

Lodgeeda = clan leader

Lodnajasta = Sentinel 

Leen = pride

 Shash = air

Sheedal = danger

Anina = Spirit

Anizhal = 

Anika = a feeling

Anicheel = day

Anitsa = eye

Ani = name

Anijee = fear

Anirana = blood

Anintal = citadel 

Atatch = skill

Aleesh = beginning 

Adon = circle

 Rana = water

Ranatatal = lake

 Tana = sky

Tanana = alien 

Tak = father

Tatal = place

Tatin = future

Tanatal = space

Tanakal = ship

Tanadar = meteor / comet ( all fiery flying objects) 

Tachal = group

Tach = clan 

Tahajeea = armor 

Tin = this/ that 

Tizhit = shame

Tinchal = today 

tsag = ball/ orb

Tsanika =belief 

Tsata = gift  

Tarik = teacher 

 Nak = mother

Nid = length

Nizad = leg

Nakt = night

Nakt- sal = dark season 

Nehchal =moon

Nehgrada = spark 

Nahatach = incompetence 

Nadzhalak = daughter

Needzhalak = son

Neenez = cloud 

Negcheel = star

Nehlata = thing

Nasash = wind

Naranatal = river

Nang = middle

Nizjahad =foot 

Chal = sun

Chahas = time

Cheel = light

Chat = word

Geeda = general

Gahan = all  (acception noun adj and adverb) 

Gaha = part

Hazad = moss

Hakanin = life

Hakasash = breath 

Had = arm

hazh = flesh

Heech = pair

Grananin = world 

Granla = mountain

Gradinar = wildfire

Jaja = end

Jahad = hand

Jial = guard

jirha = cut, wound

Jeeana = corpse 

Jeea = death 

Jeerana = dessert 

Eeda = leader

Eedacheel = (their northern star’s name) the lead star

Eeaz = a worry/ a concern 

Enadzhal = ancestry 

Etat = fur

Kat = question

Kan = nobility 

Kaneg = year

Kasa = thought

Kazna = galaxy 

Kalal = metal 

Kazga = cripple (also an insult like idiot or moron but has connotations as negative as retard (Forgive me, but that is the closest comparison) It is a very rude word. 

Kahchat = to break 

Ranasash = storm

Rantana = rain

Ranad = drink 

Ralata = soil 

Rekaz = knowledge 

Sal = season

Sakasa = mind

Shanajeea = sickness 

Stadik = anything 

Verbs

Hakasat = to breathe 

 Hastat = to walk

Hasinsat = to run

Hajat = to come

Hakastat = to exit

Hazhnat = to bother someone/ annoy

 zheengat = to fight

zhinat = to strike/hit

Zhitat = to hate

zhalat = to have

zhegingat =to want

Zhjeanat = to sacrifice 

 Cheeyat =to speak/say

Chezenat = to choke 

Chatahaat = to work 

Chazat = to make 

Cheekat = to like

 Jastat = to see

Jajat = to end

Jastanat = to predict

Jakazat = to recognize 

Jedanat = to trade/ exchange 

Jeeajat = to stop

Jeeanat = die

Jeenhalat = to exile 

Jezhinat = to block 

Jekat = to look 

Jiahat = to guard

Jishat = to secure/ to lock 

Jirat = to pull

Jirhaat = to be wounded/ injured/ hurt

Adonhajat = to wonder

 Ajat = to go in general

Anikat = to feel

Anijeeat = to be afraid of / to fear

Aninat = to live

Anintalat = to worship 

Anidonat = to wake up

Ardanat = to open 

Aleeshat = to begin

Nadanat = to fall 

Najat = to go away from/  to leave

nahasinsat= to run towards/ charge

 Najastat= to watch

Natahaat = to take

Natrekat = to learn

Neevant = to answer 

Neehahajat = to drift

nehanat

Nitsat = to happen/ occur

Nizat = to stand

 Darat = to do

Dalistat = to surprise / ambush

Daeenat = to stay 

Deengat = to eat

Dichanat = to thank

Dakat = to be ready/ prepared

Kahlat = to continue

Kahyaat = to happen

kahchat = to break

Kuhlat = to curse 

Kasat = to think

Katat = to ask a question / to question 

Kalsan = difficult 

Tadat =to be

Tatazat = to be happy 

Tanat = to fly 

Tahaat = to give

Tahajeeat = to hold 

Tarikat = to teach 

Tehat =can

Tsahastat = to enter

Tsanikat = to believe

Tsajat = to show

Tsadeengat = to cook

Tizhital = to be ashamed

Shkahrat = to prepare

Shazat = to use

Shanajeeat = to be sick/ to get sick 

Sdarat = to try 

Sesanat = to be sorry 

Gingat = to need

Gadat = to find

Geeniat = to return 

Geedanat = to lead

Rekazat = to know

Rantanat = to rain

Ranalat = to melt

Ranadat = to drink 

Lachidat = to focus 

Luhtat = to remember 

Lanat = to help 

Leenat = to be proud 

Eedat = to be in charge of

Eeazat = to worry 

Eeneenat = to understand

 Adjectives

 tsakan = which

Tizhitan = shameful 

Atatchan = skillful 

 Nidan = long

Nehgran = small

Nehdinanian = cold

Nehalan = without

Nantan = new

Neyahan = old

Neahasan = slow

Naktan = dark 

Dadan = falling

Deengan = hungry 

Ditan = so 

Daklan = amazing 

Nwadan = hard

Jenantan = old

Jeean = dying 

Jashajan = similar/ same/ resembling/ like

Yahan = good/well

Yahanan = better

Yaheen = best/ great

Yigan = every

Dinanian = hot

Dichan = thankful 

Dalistan = surprising 

Gran = big

Granan= bigger

Geenian = returning

Gingan = needy 

Tacheen = many

Tatazan = happy

Tsanikan = believable 

Tanan = flying 

Ladan = very 

Latan = rocky

Hasan = fast

Hijan = colorful / beautiful 

Ranitanan = rainy 

Ranan = watery 

Ranadan = drinkable 

Chalan = Sunny 

Adan = easy

Ardan = open

Aninan = living

Kalatan = hard (as in a texture: hard stone)

Kanan = noble

Kaan = only

Kuhlan = cursed

Kahchan = broken

Kazgan = crippled 

Sheedan = dangerous

Eeazan = worried

Eeneenan = understandable 

Etatan = furry/ hairy 

shanajan = sick 

Shazan = useful 

Stadan = any

Zhankeelan = honorable

Colors

Hija = color

Hajtan = blue

Dinhijan = red

Dihijan = purple 

Dichijan = orange

Jeehijan = black 

Luhijan = green

Chalijan = yellow

Naijan = white

Nadijan = pink

Latijan = grey 

Halujan = turquoise 

Adverb

 Atatchtee = skillfully

Neahasandee = slowly

Nehatatchtee = poorly 

Prepositions

  La = on

Lad = about

Lariz = on top of

Ladka = beside 

Dat = before (has a meaning in time, not temporal) before we go. not he stood before me

Dana = above 

dal= up

S = with

K = to 

Hak = from 

Hakniz = below 

Ts = in 

Adonha = around

Riz = upwho

Niz = down 

Keed = before (temporal meaning) 

Tsil = inside

Time words

Tasahas = during 

Neeka = never 

Zhakaz = ago

Gahas = forever

Conjunction 

Ee = and

J = but

Tasan = also (irregular) 

Dit = so

  Question words

 Tsaee = why

Tuhn = when 

 Gda = where

Lod = who 

 Nin = what

Dach = how

Others b/c I am not a linguist

 Nahang-ta = because

 Je = no

Yid = yes

Dee = would

Teeya = for ( the benefit of a person or animate object)

Laza = for (used with anything inanimate) 

Deri = re 

Ena = pre

Kayad = should 

Huka = than 

Juhkee = then 

Ene = if

Jej = too 

Numers

Ka = one

Hee = two 

Heeka = three

 Important Phrases

Ts zhin = goodbye (Direct translation is, in battle deriving from I will see you in battle

Nezanin = of course

[some-lists]

All the Disney Princesses Ranked From Worst to Best.

(Sorry, no Vanellope.)

14. Merida

I know Merida has really badass archery skills. She’s also outspoken, strong willed, and clever. But she’s still my least favorite princess. I just didn’t like her. Maybe it’s the fact that she wanted to change her mom. And she actually went through with it. Of course, she didn’t actually know what was going to happen, and the journey brought them closer together. She grew as a character and that’s good. But just seeing her disrespect her mother, especially publicly in front of all the clans, is hard to watch. It doesn’t help that I thought Brave was one of Pixar’s weaker movies and essentially Brother Bear all over again.

13. Anna

Not gonna lie. I hate Anna. She’s so damn pushy and combative. I know, it’s all her parents’ fault. All of it. But still. She doesn’t listen to Elsa at all. She pushes and pushes triggering Elsa’s ice outbursts, which become more visible as they build along with her anxiety. Every uncontrolled “accident” Elsa has in the first film is because Anna didn’t listen to her. Of course, she also didn’t listen to Elsa’s warning about marrying Hans either. She foolishly left the kingdom in the hands of an outsider, someone she didn’t even know.

She definitely shows improvement in the second film. She becomes more sensitive towards Elsa’s feelings and her powers. She’s also very loyal and brave, risking her life for Elsa, yet again. She’s still very clingy and desperate for people’s love. It manifests in her fear of losing Elsa and Kristoff. I do not like her humor or awkwardness. I don’t find them relatable, but rather annoying. But I do appreciate that those insecurities are real and that’s what makes her more relatable. Her relationships with the other characters, especially Olaf, is what saves her from being last on my list.

12. Tiana

There’s nothing wrong Tiana. I think she’s great. She’s hardworking, determined, and a realist. Those are great qualities that I’m glad Disney decided to focus on too. The downside of this is that she comes across as rather boring. The film relies on other more colorful characters to bring the personality and charm. I think that’s a shame. She also suffers from starring in a weaker film.

11. Aurora

I like Aurora. What little we see of her anyway. We can tell by the way she interacts with the fairies, woodland creatures, and Prince Philip that she’s smart, sweet, shy, kind, cautious. She’s a dreamer, but not foolish. It’s too bad we didn’t get to see more of her.

10. Snow White

Snow White, in my opinion, does not get the respect she deserves. Was she stupid to take that apple from the very obviously evil hag? Yes, she was. But people have forgotten all about the really great qualities she possessed too. When she walked into the dwarfs’ cottage, it was a disgusting, unlivable nightmare. The dwarfs were pigs. They didn’t clean their home or themselves. They bickered all the time. Snow White changed all of that. She created order where there was disorder. And she didn’t do it alone. She delegated chores to each of the animals and made sure they did them right. That’s some managerial skills! She got a bunch of unruly little men to wash, sleep at a decent time, and behave. That’s authority. Those are some real life skills I wish I had more of. Yes, she cooked, cleaned, and sewed, but Snow White wasn’t a servant. She was in charge.

9. Cinderella

Like Snow White, Cinderella has gotten a bad rap over time, but I will defend Cinderella anytime anywhere. Those who say she “needed a prince to save her” lack compassion and are completely missing the point. Cinderella was a young woman who was abused by what family she had left. At a young age she experienced loss, grief, then neglect and emotional abuse. But Cinderella was resilient. That abuse didn’t stop her and it didn’t change her. She could’ve become mean, bitter, and jealous. She could’ve continued the cycle of abuse like her stepsisters. But Cinderella didn’t allow their mistreatment to define her. She remained kind, empathetic, patient, humble, and hardworking. She also didn’t allow herself to become a victim. She didn’t mope or give up on herself. When the ball was announced, she worked hard and believed she would go. When she got help from the fairy godmother, she accepted it and rocked that ball gown. She didn’t go to the ball to be rescued. She went because she wanted to, and she did. Moral of the story is do not let others’ treatment of you determine who you are or what you’re worth. Cinderella had awesome inner strength.

8. Ariel

I will admit that as an adult, Ariel’s appeal fades. She made really bad choices and sacrificing her voice for a boy is a terrible message to sell to kids. But for a 5 year old girl, only two things mattered. She was a mermaid and she could sing. The Little Mermaid kick started Disney’s renaissance and set a new precedent for its movies. Unlike previous princesses, Ariel was the first princess full of life, passion, and adventure. She had an exciting and lovable personality and a Broadway singing voice. Credit goes to Jodi Benson for bringing Ariel to life and the writers for getting the world to fall in love with her. She made a huge impression (hello, mermaid craziness everywhere!), even if she was a total idiot teenager.

7. Jasmine

What’s great about Jasmine is she can see through people’s BS and she doesn’t put up with it. She isn’t impressed by the superficial suitors that come her way. She stands up to Jafar. She catches on pretty immediately that Prince Ali is actually Aladdin. She sings like Lea Salonga, Disney and Broadway legend, and she has a pet tiger. What’s not to love?

6. Pocahontas

Pocahontas was the first Disney princess to not go after her dreams, but instead chose family, community, duty, loyalty. That’s incredibly mature and selfless. She taught a racist, arrogant, ignorant man to love and respect others different from him. She followed her intuition, was one nature, and dove off cliffs. The only minus is falling for John Smith over Kokoam. I don’t know what she was thinking!

5. Moana

Moana is not qualified for her mission. She has no experience and no skills required for sailing across the sea, finding Maui, and defeating a lava monster. But it’s her purpose. She was chosen. So she sets out and figures it out along the way. That’s an inspiring example. It’s not until the end that we find out why she was chosen. She sees Te Ka for who she truly is. Te Fiti. The image above is one of the most powerful moments in all of Disney’s films.

4. Rapunzel

Similar to Cinderella, Rapunzel has been abused throughout her childhood. IMO, Rapunzel had it worse because she believed Mother Gothel was her mother. Their relationship was nonstop manipulation, infantilization, and gaslighting. But Rapunzel was brave enough to go after what she wanted and smart enough to find a way to do it. On top of that, she was creative and artistic, incredibly strong from years of hauling Mother Gothel up the tower, and had magical hair with healing powers. In the end, she does what we didn’t get to see in Cinderella. She stands up for herself and confronts her abuser. She’s a real survivor and victor.

3. Belle

I love Belle because she is a true introvert and a true individual. She’s not very social, doesn’t gossip, doesn’t fawn over Gaston, doesn’t follow the townsfolk’s way of life. She literally just does her own thing. For that, she’s misunderstood and judged by the village. I think that’s very relatable. But she’s also intelligent, curious, adventurous, honorable (she keeps her promise to stay with the Beast), and stands up to the Beast when he’s out of line. She’s the only one that truly challenges the Beast and he grows because of it. And she saves him.

2. Mulan

Similar to Belle, Mulan is a bit of an outcast, because she’s individualistic in a society that values conformity. She’s socially awkward, clumsy, but brave. That bravery saves her father and all of China. She’s a true badass warrior.

1. Elsa

Elsa is technically not a princess, but a queen. She still counts and she tops my list. Out of all the Disney princesses, she is the most real and fully developed. She’s beautiful, kind, brave, strong, but also very flawed. Many people have identified with Elsa in different ways because her flaws are so real and so relatable. The LGBTQ community has adopted her as a symbol of their own. For me personally, I see a mental health issue. I think she’s a highly sensitive person with anxiety. Her ice powers are a beautiful symbol for that anxiety and the struggle over her mental health. Her journey to accept herself for who she is, to embrace herself for who she is, and to find her place in a world that deems her different is truly beautiful and empowering.

[atiny-one-blog]

3-3-3: Kyle's very own Spring Awakening

Blog Entry: April 19 2019 (Urdaneta, Pangasinan)

This blog contains a compilation of short stories of my life in March, the month which initiaties the spring season in other countries, along with the lessons that I understood in the SocSci modules discussed in the weeks of the said month. Give it a go!

The ghosts of the past keep on haunting me

It was March 23, two days after my mother came home from Qatar. She was an overseas worker, a nurse in a big hospital in the Middle East country. The night was still young, and everybody was doing their own thing. And then it happened.

My mother called everyone downstairs, I had no clue on what was going on for I was doing my assignment in the room — locked myself up so I wouldn’t be disturbed.

My younger brother knocked on the door.

“Kuya, baba daw lahat,” Kit asked me.

I hastily went down to see what’s up. All of my siblings were sitting on the sofa, and my mother was on a chair in front of the television. She wore a mad face. I was a bit frightened but still wore a smile to give a little bit of liveliness in the room. Everyone was quiet and staring at the floor.

“Alam niyo, dalawang araw pa lang ako rito, pero sobrang disappointed na ko sa inyo,” my mother said. She was expecting the house to be squeaky clean and tidy.

The debate about the neatness of the house was acceptable. However, things turned hell when my mother started pointing at people, asking them what had they done to the house and to their family. When it was my turn, I was calm, I wasn’t guilty of anything because I had done my job the other day, I helped her clean the whole living room and storage room for Christ’s sake. But still, she was angry.

The situation turned worse. Everyone was shouting, everyone was crying, everyone was mad and was out of their minds. My siblings and I tried to explain to her that we did everything that we could, it was just that we were busy at the time. That it hurt us, that the way she looked at us was that we were irresponsible sons and daughter for her.

“Ang masakit kasi, ‘Ma, is ‘yung ginagawa naman namin lahat, pero pakiramdam namin hindi yun enough para sa’yo,” my sister spoke, after I argued that there was something wrong with my mother’s proposition on our deeds.

But she didn’t believe it, and went to tell her story in the past.

On how her parents made her do all the work in the house. On how while she was very young, everything that the family needs to do, she did it all. On how she went to the farmlands immediately after studying in school. On how her father would punish her if she had time for herself and rest. On how she fed the pigs, cleaned their pen, cleaned herself, and then her house afterward. The hell of her life. It was definitely a circle of hell.

I tried to explain it to her, that maybe that was something that affected how she treated us on that day — but to no avail. It was obvious. It was the truth. I was crying, my siblings were crying, she was crying. She told us that she was hurt because we told her these lies, it was disgusting. It wasn’t a lie though. It was true.

In my perspective, with how she grew up, she was fixated in almost all of the stages of development. It was sad. She was my mother. But she wouldn’t listen, simply because, mother knows best and that the parents would always be right.

I went upstairs, crying, knowing that the debate wouldn’t stop unless she tried to put her ego down. I went to bed, everything seemed quiet, and fell asleep.

Intergenerational patterns

I walked in the Office of Guidance and Counselling, alone, waiting for four (4) other people in the Genogram Session. I was excited, elated, nervous, and scared. I didn’t know what was going to happen.

Fifteen minutes passed. Came Sam and Nikka. We entered Ms. Borje’s Office, everything was quiet.

“If wala pa sila by ten minutes, I’ll close the door and then let’s start,” Ms. Borje exclaimed.

Nikka hurriedly opened her phone, asked two of our remaining blockmates to walk faster.

Past ten minutes and still there were no signs of the two. Borje closed the door and started gleefully.

And then there was Renz and Carla in front of the door.

“Okay,” Ms Borje said, opening the door.

The genogram session started with everyone being kind of closed, I bet we were all scared to share a part of our family with five other people in the room. It is by the near end, though, that we realized it was definitely okay, that we’d actually benefit more in doing so rather than keeping quiet.

We learned a lot in the session, and one of these, basically, are some intergenerational traits that seem to be inherited from the treetop down to the roots of our family (us, lol, sorry for the wth metaphor).

For my family, there are three (3) traits that I seem to recognize. Three that I see is similar to each and everyone of the family: generosity, hospitality, and lack of time management.

Out of these three, obviously, one is odd one out: lack of time management. In our family, time is really - really very much neglected. Being tardy for school (and even for work) is normal. Even for dates, time is inessential. When we go out, and planned to, say go in 5pm, everyone would cram, preparing at 4:59 and leaving at 7 (???). A very negative habit which we acquired from our parents, grandparents, grand grandparents, grand grand grandparents. Recently, we try to manage time. As far as even adjusting the clock 30 minutes in advance so that we have that gap to avoid being late. It’s working, and I hope, continue to do so in the future.

The other two, on the other hand, are some of the best intergenerational traits that I have inherited. Generosity and hospitality are some of the things that I am proud to practice and have. With these trait, I believe, I am more generous and more caring to other people. It teaches me to be selfless in this world of selfish people. I just want to make libre everyday, I want guests and friends that enter my house to be full before going home. My dad and mom taught me that. They always told me “huwag mo na tanungin ang bisita kung gutom sila, magbigay ka lang ng pagkain kasi nahihiya sila”. And I think, that’s very beautiful.

There’s one solution in keeping the good traits, and removing the bad ones: PRACTICE.

To keep the good traits, generosity and hospitality, I should practice doing them frequently. And to avoid the negative one, lack of time management, I should practice being early, as well as, managing my time in bits such as having a planner, being cautious of time, et cetera, et cetera.

kayLONG: My Evolution

I remember when my family and I were eating at Mall of Asia in Tempura, just having a good time, my Mama, talking casually about me and my siblings, suddenly highlighted my childhood, “Yan si Kyle ‘pag iniiwan namin dati, iyak nang iyak.”

(‘Til now though, iyakin pa rin ako)

At that time, we just finished the module regarding Psychososcial Theory by Erik Erikson, and oof my brain started to relate my Mama’s story as to what I have learned.

According to Erik Erikson’s theory, as seen in the Figure above, in the infancy years (about 0-2 years old), children try to develop the virtue of hope, with the crisis of trust and mistrust.

Considering the story that Mama told me, I’ve probably gone crumbling down to the wrong side of the scale, ‘causing me to be distrustful even until today.

Distrustful to friends and even to family. What’s even funnier though is that my perspective with hope changes from time-to-time. I help people to go through their problems, give them “hope”. I tell my groupmates and friends, “kaya pa ‘yan”, all the time, but when it comes to myself, I quit and fall in a negative spiral when sh*t actually goes down in my life.

Moving on, which is saddening, in the next four stages, I’ve been on the wrong side of the scale, too. I have shame and doubt, I have guilt, inferiority, and I am confused to what I am and what I will be in life.

Today, I’m trying to rebuild the core values intertwined with each of those stages. It’s a struggle, but I’ll power through.

My life’s melancholic, but I’ll continue to be happy! 

I’ll try my best to turn things around when I get to the next three stages.

Lezzgo!

[mamabearcat]

The Importance of Ramen 5

I really wanted to get this chapter done in time for the friendship themed day for Inuvember. Not sure if I’ve missed it or not, I’ve totally lost track. But this chapter is all about friendship. It’s time to stage an emotional intervention, InuCrew style.

The Importance of Ramen  Ch 1  Ch 2  Ch 3  Ch 4  

On FanFiction.net if you’d prefer; my name is Daisy73 over there.

Kagome opened her eyes, struggling to focus. Everything looked blurry as she fought her way to consciousness. She could hear the crackle of a fire, the occasional pop of the kindling in the flames a comforting familiar sound. She felt strong hands shifting behind her back, helping her sit up. The room suddenly tilted crazily, and she felt nauseous, sweat breaking out on her forehead. Her lips clenched shut as she felt her stomach roll. After a few moments it settled, and she leaned floppily like a rag doll against the hands and solid warmth behind her. An object appeared in front of her face. Squinting, she struggled to work out what it was, trying to get both her eyes and brain to focus.

“Kagome, you need to drink this.” She vaguely recognised Sango’s voice, although it sounded weird, like she was talking through a hollow tube. Kagome shook her head, trying to focus, and when the ringing buzzed in her ears, she wished she hadn’t.

“Wah?”, Kagome answered incoherently. She blinked her eyes rapidly, nose crinkled in frustration that she couldn’t get the room to stay still.

“Kagome, you need to drink this tea. It’s the one Kaede prescribes to combat the side effects of blood loss.” She felt gentle hands tilting her head and felt the edge of a cup against her lips. She forced herself to swallow the mouthful of warm liquid as it trickled over her tongue. It was so bitter it made her want to retch.

“That’s so gross”, Kagome muttered, shivering in revulsion and poking her tongue out of her mouth repeatedly as if in the hope that it would get rid of the taste.

 “I know”, chortled a deep voice behind her. She could feel the rumble of Inuyasha’s contained laughter against her back; she must be leaning up against him. “I always tell you that, and yet you still make me drink it. You gotta learn to take your own medicine Ka-go-me”.

“Bite me, dog-boy”, Kagome grumbled, her eyes screwed tightly shut, still struggling with the mouthfuls of foul liquid that Sango was helping her to swallow. She could hear a chuckling Mirokou somewhere to her left and felt tiny comforting pats on her knee from little hands; at least Shippou wasn’t making fun of her. 

“My otousan always said that the worse a medicine tasted, the faster it would cure you. You’ll feel better in no time Kagome”, comforted Shippou. Kagome snorted in amongst her efforts to gulp down the bitter liquid. Her own mother had fed her a similar fib when she was younger to get her to swallow medicine, but she wasn’t about to say anything disparaging about a memory that Shippou chose to share about his father. She did her best to smile in his direction, although it felt more like a grimace.

“Where are we?”, she asked after having finally worried down the last of the disgusting tea.

“After assisting the village head man in the matter of an evil spirit that was lurking in his storehouse”, began Mirokou, ignoring the ‘pfft’ noise coming from Sango’s direction, “he was so kind as to offer us the use of a hut they offer to visiting dignitaries”.

“You’re slipping monk”, teased Inuyasha. “No one’s been in this hut for ages. It reeks of dust and damp. I’d say somebody died in here years ago, and it hasn’t been used since.”

“No matter”, smiled Mirokou. “The use of it is free, the roof has no leaks and is keeping out the storm, and we’ve been able to use the firepit for cooking”. Kagome looked as he gestured towards the flickering fire, where a metal pot hung from chains on a tripod over the flames, its lid rattling gently over the simmering contents within.

“I should probably check the stew”, agreed Sango. She carefully lifted the lid from the pot and all of them sniffed the rich aroma appreciatively, even Kagome. Although her stomach still felt unsettled, the nauseous feeling was rapidly being replaced by a gnawing hunger.

Kagome looked around the small hut. Now that she had been sitting up for a while, she was able to pay more attention to her surroundings. She was sitting in her sleeping bag, with her back resting against Inuyasha’s chest, his longer legs stretched out either side of her. Looking down at her clothes, she realised that she was wearing a fresh clean t-shirt, and the bandage on her upper arm had been changed. Her bottom half seemed dry also, and with a slight flush of mortification, she hoped Sango had been the one to change her clothing. She felt comfortable, even though her wounds still throbbed a bit, especially the one on her thigh. She would have to get up and walk on it soon, so her leg didn’t get stiff. She couldn’t afford to slow everyone down; they needed to get back to the shard hunt tomorrow, especially since… the sudden memory of who they had met in the bamboo forest had her stiffening, and she grabbed Inuyasha’s hand that was resting on his thigh.

“Kagura! Inuyasha, have you…” Her sudden movement made her head thump, and she felt dizzy and sick again.

“Kagome, you need to eat first. You’ll get sick if you don’t”. Inuyasha’s grip on her hand was firm.

“No, no, we need to talk about Kagura; have you told everyone about what she said?!” She could feel her heart rate increasing; they needed to plan. For Kagura to come and warn them about a possible threat from Naraku it must be really bad! She felt a prickling in her scalp and a buzzing noise in her ears, and knowing it was a sign she would possibly pass out, she bent herself forwards, breathing heavily.

“Oi, Kagome, calm down!” Inuyasha’s warm hand on her back was soothing; she could feel Shippou hugging her feet through the sleeping bag. His anxious jittery movements made her realise that she was frightening the little fox kit, so she forced herself to take deep breaths until she felt less wobbly.

“Sorry everyone”, she said more calmly, sitting herself up gradually. “I just suddenly remembered, and it made me freak out a bit.” She bit her lip at the concerned look that passed between Mirokou and Sango. Everyone had enough to worry about without adding her to the list. The whole reason she was pushing her training was so that they didn’t have to worry about her anymore. She sat up straight and plastered a smile on her face. “I’m good now.”

Sango approached Kagome with a tin mug full of thick stew; meat and vegetables flooded with thick gravy. She looked from the mug back up to Sango, and down to the stew again.

“Wow, how long was I asleep?!”

“Coupla hours. Now, eat. I didn’t go hunting rabbits in the rain for you to turn your nose up at it”, Inuyasha rumbled grumpily. He shuffled himself backwards, so he was leaning against the wall of the hut, then pulled on the sleeping bag until he dragged both it and her over to lean on him again. “Eat wench! Or do I have ta get Sango to feed ya like a pup?!”

Sango giggled at Kagome’s disgruntled expression as she served out stew for the rest of them. The little hut was silent for a while, apart from the crackling of the fire and distant rumbling of thunder, as everyone enjoyed their dinner and then had second helpings of the rabbit stew.

Kagome was the last to put down her empty mug with a satisfied sigh. Shippou and Kirara were already asleep, Shippou starfished on a blanket near the dying fire, his small rounded belly rising and falling accompanied by tiny snuffling snores. Kirara was tucked into his side, her twin tails resting primly over her eyes and nose. Mirokou and Sango were exchanging cheerful banter while they tidied the cooking equipment away, and Inuyasha seemed to be happy to stay silent behind her, Tessaiga propped against his shoulder.

Her belly now pleasantly full, Kagome didn’t feel dizzy anymore. In fact, apart from still feeling a little tired and the throbbing of the wound in her thigh, her body was feeling pretty good. What a shame that her brain continued going into overdrive. She hadn’t been awake for the entire conversation between Inuyasha and Kagura; had only woken when she felt him hunch over her and growl protectively. They needed to discuss and analyse what Kagura’s message might mean. Was it a trap? Was Kagura trying to divert their focus from Naraku by hinting at a fictional foe? Or was she trying to be their ally in her own roundabout way. She twisted her hands together in her lap nervously as her thoughts bounced around, the worried look shared between Mirokou, Sango and Inuyasha going totally unnoticed.

Mirokou cleared his throat. “Kagome”, he began carefully, trying to get her attention.

“Mmm?”

“I… that is, we”, he continued as he gestured to include Sango and Inuyasha, “can’t help but notice that lately your mood seems a little…” He faltered as Kagome narrowed her eyes at him, but continued bravely, “tense.”

Kagome snorted. “Ya think?”, she mumbled, eyeing him intently. “In case you hadn’t noticed Mirokou, these are quite stressful times. They don’t call this time period the Sengoku Jidai for nothing.”

Mirokou nodded. “Yes, that is quite true. But, if you’ll forgive me for pointing it out, there seems to have been a definite increase in the intensity of your emotions lately.”

“We’re worried about you Kagome”, added Sango. “Inuyasha said that you haven’t been resting properly when you return to the future to attend school.”

Kagome delivered a swift elbow to the fire rat covered ribs behind her. “Oi!”, Inuyasha protested, grabbing the uninjured arm that delivered the blow, “it’s for your own good, stupid! When you go back to the shrine, whaddya think everyone else does. They stay at Kaede’s and get some sleep and relax. They don’t spend hours and hours training on top of schoolwork and shrine stuff without sleeping!”

“You don’t understand…”

Sango knelt beside her and held Kagome’s twisting fingers gently in her own. “We understand better than you might think Kagome. Do you think I became a taijiya overnight? That Mirokou learned to wield his shakujo and his abilities as a monk without patience and practice. That Inuyasha was born knowing how to deliver a sankon tessou with his claws?”

Kagome’s bottom lip trembled at the kind look on Sango’s face. “But that’s why I have to train harder. I can never catch up. You’re already so good at this, all of you. I just get in the way most of the time. You waste time rescuing me when we should be chasing jewel shards. Demons target me because they can sense I’m the weakest in the group.”

“Bullshit”, growled Inuyasha behind her, dropping his head to rest on top of hers and wrapping an arm around her waist. “That’s crap Kagome, and you know it. Demons target you because you’re the one carrying the fucking jewel shards, no other reason. And who said you needed to catch up. We’ve already talked about this. I said that I would always be around to punch the fuckers first, remember?”

“But what if you’re not?”, whispered Kagome.

“I believe I also said that we could ask Sango for help to give you some pointers on self-defence, if you wanted. That didn’t mean work yourself until you were half dead. Kagome, you’re doing too much. You’re gonna burn out, and then where will we be?”

“Minus a shard detector”, sighed Kagome.

A look of exasperation passed across Mirokou’s usually calm face. “Kagome, I am totally supportive of your will to improve your abilities, but this must stop. You are more than a shard detector to us. You are our comrade, our friend, and it is painful for us to watch you struggling like this.” His face softened. “I sense there is more to this than just a need to be able to defend yourself.”

Kagome looked from Mirokou’s calm smile to Sango’s kind expression. Inuyasha pulled her against him firmly; she could feel his steady heartbeat pulsing against her back. She knew that they weren’t going to leave this alone, that they would keep pushing gently until they got an answer. She looked down at her hands, still clasped within Sango’s.

“I have to improve, to get better, because this whole mess is my fault. I’m the one that shattered the jewel. I’m the one who spilled that evil far and wide. Every time a village gets taken down by a demon with a jewel shard, that’s my fault. Every innocent child that gets killed is my fault. I have to be faster, contain the bloodshed, stop this before more families are broken apart.”

Sango stared at Kagome in dismay, letting go of her hands. “But Kagome, how can you think that? It’s Naraku’s fault!”

Kagome kept her gaze lowered, her brown eyes clouded by tears. “Not all these demons are given shards by Naraku. Not all of it is his fault. I’m the one who brought the stone back to this time. I’m the one who shattered it. It’s my responsibility.” A low growl behind Kagome hardly gave her a warning before she was suddenly spun around by strong hands to look into Inuyasha’s scowling face.

“Wench, did you create the jewel? Did you ask to be reborn with it? Did you make yourself come back 500 years to the past?”

“No, but…”

“Then it’s not your fault stupid.” Inuyasha glared at her in frustration. “Fuck, Kagome, if I’d known that this was the sort of rubbish filling up your head, I would made you talk about this months ago.” He grasped her smaller hands in his, shaking her hands gently at every word to emphasise them. “You need to let this go. It’s not helpin’ you get better, it’s eatin’ you alive. You wanna turn this into a guilt competition, all of us could probably trump you with stuff we’ve done in the past.”

Sango murmured her agreement. “Kagome, the past doesn’t matter now. We need to keep our heads in the present, otherwise we won’t work together well as a team.”

“But if I hadn’t split the jewel…”

Mirokou touched her shoulder to get her attention. “Kagome, let me propose an alternative for you to consider. Imagine if Naraku had retrieved the whole jewel at the beginning, before you met the rest of us, before you had got to know Inuyasha better and began training with Kaede. Naraku would have been unstoppable. The world as we know it would have been covered in darkness already, with countless lives lost. You shattering the jewel, mistake though it was, has given us a real chance of defeating him.”

Sango embraced her shoulders gently. “I could never regret meeting you Kagome. In my heart you are like a younger sister to me. We have been through so much together and are likely to go through much more.”

Kagome burst into tears. Today had just been too much. Sango continued to hug her shoulders, Mirokou patted her back gently, and Inuyasha rubbed his thumbs comfortingly against her hands.

“You are my family”, sobbed Kagome. “Sango, you are like a sister to me too.” She breathed in shakily. “Mirokou, you’re like an older brother, one I need to warn my girl friends about”. She giggled shakily at Sango’s snort of laughter and Mirokou’s mock aggrieved expression at her comment. She smiled tearily at the small pair snoring by the fire. “Shippou is like a baby brother and son combined, Kirara is a friend I can always count on, and Inuyasha, you…” She looked up at the amber eyes, still focused on her with concern. “You… are…” She couldn’t stop the blush that rose in her cheeks, and could only gaze into his eyes, hoping he could guess at what she couldn’t bring herself to say when they had an audience. She watched the colour rise in his own cheeks as he continued to hold her hands and return her meaningful look.

“Yeah, wench. Same”, he replied softly.

Mirokou coughed behind them, and the spell was broken. Inuyasha dropped her hands, tucking his own back in his sleeves, turning his gaze up to the roof of the hut. Sango gave Kagome’s shoulders a conspiratorial squeeze, which Kagome chose to ignore.

After a few moments, Inuyasha looked back at Kagome with a fanged grin, now that she was calmer. “Your mother said as much, ya know. That you were trying so hard because you thought of us as family.”

Kagome sighed. “You already have so much pain to bear, between the three of you. That’s why I didn’t want to add mine to it.”

Sango smiled at her. “Well, now I hope you know better. When you’ve recovered from your injuries, I’m hopeful that you will show me the self defence techniques that you’ve been learning in the future. I am always interested in adding to my range of attack and defence. Perhaps we could spar together, now and then, when we stop for breaks.”

“And if you would permit me, perhaps we could combine our skills to work on building defensive barriers together”, added Mirokou. “Kaede and I have done so in the past, and it makes sense to add this to our abilities in pursuit of Naraku.”

Kagome smiled at both of them, wiping away the tears with her good arm. “You guys are the best”, she beamed at them.

“So ya know what that means, wench.” Kagome turned her face forward to look at Inuyasha, perplexed. “When you go back to the shrine, just do ya schoolwork. We can work on the other stuff while you’re here.”

“What about my archery practice?”

“I’ll just paint a bullseye on Shippou – I’m sure you’ll get faster results practicing on a moving target”. Inuyasha gave her a toothy grin as Kagome swatted him hard on the arm. “Okay, okay, you can practice a bit. But ya gotta promise me you’ll sleep.” His face grew more serious. “I mean it wench; I can get away with it, but humans gotta sleep. You got hurt today, and I don’t want that to happen again because you’re too tired to pay attention.”

“Okay”, she smiled. Kagome yawned, taking herself by surprise. “Are we going to discuss Kagura’s warning?”

“Tomorrow, after you’ve had a good night’s sleep, and I’ve checked your wounds again”, answered Sango. “And after you’ve eaten breakfast and drunk some more tea”, giggling at Kagome’s groan of dismay.

“Don’t wanna”, she pouted, as everyone made ready to get to sleep.

“What’s that thing you say to Souta? Sucks to be you!” chuckled Inuyasha. She glared at him before moving in her sleeping bag, ready to crawl away from him closer to the fire. When his arm pulled gently on her hand, she looked at him in surprise.

“You could stay here, with me.” Kagome looked at him, open mouthed. He flushed, suddenly looking past her, to the fire. “Uh, I mean, you shouldn’t be moving around on that leg. It took Sango a while to get it to stop bleeding when we finally got here, and I don’t want you to feel sick again.” They both chose to ignore Mirokou and Sango snickering in the background.

“Okay”, she agreed with a smile. Inuyasha shifted so that his legs were out straight and helped her snuggle down so her head lay pillowed on his thighs. Her thoughts drifted back to the night she had done the same for him, the first time she had discovered his human night fighting against the spider head demons. The night he had told her that she smelt nice. 

“Kagome”, Inuyasha began uncertainly, “do you feel… better… about what was worrying you? About the jewel I mean?”

Kagome sighed. “Yes and no”, she answered. “I still feel responsible for shattering the jewel”, she looked up at Inuyasha’s face as he grunted in annoyance, “but, I feel better about having shared it with everyone. I know we all have different reasons for wanting to defeat Naraku and get rid of the Shikon jewel, but if we all work together, I know we can do it.” 

“Alright, go to sleep wench.”

Kagome yawned again and closed her eyes. The storm had died down, and she could hear gentle rain pattering on the thatched roof above. Mirokou poured water on the last embers in the fire pit, and the hut became dark, lit only by faint shafts of moonlight filtering in through the reed mat that covered the doorway.

As she heard Sango and Mirokou’s breathing become more regular as they slipped into sleep, Kagome felt Inuyasha’s clawed fingers carding through her long hair, hesitantly at first, and then as she made no attempt to stop him, more firmly, scratching against her scalp lightly. Kagome smiled blissfully against her hakama covered pillow, rubbing her cheek against the rough fabric. She dared a small kiss to Inuyasha’s thigh before she drifted into sleep, not quite sure if she had imagined Inuyasha’s whisper, “Sweet dreams, my Kagome.”

[arisaknightengale]

Mother Adaar

Katari Adaar. Weapon that brings death. Herald of Andraste. Inquisitor. Vashoth warrior. Valo-Kas mercenary. Lover of The Iron Bull. And future mother.

She was going to be a mother, and boy did that not sit well with her. How would she tell Bull? Or anyone, for that matter? The instant anyone knew she was pregnant, she’d be permanently benched despite the Inquisition being so close to defeating Corypheus. Katari had to be the one to finish the fight, if only so she can have the sheer satisfaction of being the one to cleave the bastard in two.

Days before the final battle with Corypheus, Vivienne and Leliana pulled her aside. They had somehow figured out that she was with child, and she quickly begged them to secrecy until after the final battle. Vivienne offered to help her find clothes that fit better and would hide her belly well enough, and Leliana asked Dagna and Harrit to craft her a new set of armor that would have extra protection around her middle. Katari specified that she wanted to make sure the change in clothes and armor was subtle enough that no one could guess that she had extra protection or extra bagginess.

Vivienne took her on a spa day trip to Val Royeux to get clothes tailor made for her, with the particular maternity tailor being bought to secrecy. Her clothes remained looking similar enough to what she already had back at Skyhold, simple in look and able to protect from the biting mountain winds. Leliana kept Dagna and Harrit none the wiser with the armor request, fabricating a story about the potential for a particular breed of Red Templar that would target Katari’s abdomen more often due to her standing a head taller than most. Harrit grumbled about no one telling him that the Inquisitor had a viable weakpoint in her armor, though Dagna added that she would add a rune or two that could potentially act as an extra “shield” for the Qunari woman.

When the day came for the final confrontation, Vivienne and Dorian pulled Katari aside. The former mercenary had forgotten that in her jump forward in time with Dorian, he knew that she would have been pregnant when Corypheus killed her, and that the news had destroyed Bull. The two mages offered to focus more on protecting her and her unborn, so that both souls could survive. Should she fall, Dorian would find her soul and the baby’s as quick as he could and force them back into her body, though the amount of magic needed for that would keep Dorian out of commission. He didn’t tell her that though, for all he wanted to see his friend survive this battle and become an amazing mother. Katari joked that if she made it out of the fight alive, as well as her baby, she would make it official that Vivienne and Dorian are the aunt and uncle.

Katari and her inner circle lead the march to the final confrontation. Bull was by her side, none the wiser that his Kadan’s belly was swelling with his child. The only tell he had that something was off about Katari was that she no longer ran headlong into the fray, instead calculating her moves.

The dragon—archdemon—whatever the hell that thing was attacked them first, and throughout the battle Katari made sure that each swing of her axe counted. Her Reaver abilities wouldn’t help her, for they relied on her being injured. She used her strategies for battling a normal dragon, leaping away when any leg was poised for kicking and keeping close to the beast itself when it created it’s vortex. Despite her calculated moves, she still sustained some injuries, though the stronger batch of health potions given to her by Dorian and Vivienne ensured the safety of her and her child. Once the dragon fell, it was time for the bastard that had made her life hell.

As she and her inner circle was poised to confront Corypheus, a gravelly voice invaded her mind. “You’re with child… You stole my pet from me, so I shall steal your child from you!” Katari let out a rumbling roar that put Bull to shame, a look of pure, bloodthirsty rage distorting her features. She didn’t say a word as she charged, Bull and the others following. She dodged and weaved with each shot of magic he fired at her, a feral growl reverberating from deep within her throat. Emulating Bull in many of their previous battles, she launched herself up from a boulder, her great axe raised high and meant to cleave the bastard in two. Unfortunately, he had anticipated her reckless rage and shot a bolt of crackling red energy directly at her stomach. Unable to block in time, Katari could only scream as she was knocked back midair, clutching her stomach and curling into the fetal position.

Fighting raged on around her, though Dorian, Vivienne, and Bull had come to her side. Cassandra rallied the others around her to keep fighting, to protect the Inquisitor at all costs. Even though Katari was trying desperately to not let the pain show, terror ripped through her at the thought of losing her unborn. Vivienne quietly reassured her that she hadn’t lost the baby, though Katari needed to drink one of the potions quickly to heal some of the internal damage she had suffered.

Corypheus’ voice rang out, targeting the fears and weakness of each and every person there. Until he got to her. “You never would have been a good mother. Your fear and doubt plagues you even now, and your twins shall perish with you!” Using her axe as a crutch, Katari slowly stood, clutching her belly while Bull stared at her. “Y-you’re pregnant…?” She could only nod before taking one of her potions, praying to whatever gods there were that the precautions taken before the battle were enough to protect her unborn. Before she could finish the potion though, Bull let loose a bellowing roar and attacked Corypheus, shouting in Qunlat. She had never seen him that enraged, not even when he had become Tal-Vashoth.

Katari cried out to him, the potion’s effects helping her to walk steadily. “Kadan! He’s mine to kill.” The deathly calm in her voice as she said their name for each other was the only thing that stopped him. “Corypheus, this ends now. You have threatened the world, my friends, and now my family. You will die!” Katari dropped her axe to just one hand, dragging it behind her as she approached him. Sparks flew as her axe dragged against stone, her gait becoming faster as she and Corypheus closed the distance between them. She could tell that the others had worn him down while she had healed up. When they were close to colliding into each other, Katari let out a gravelly scream and swung her axe, the blade connecting with Corypheus’ side before slicing him in two.

As his body slid apart before her, Katari dropped her weapon and reached for the orb Corypheus had been holding. Crackling with green Fade energy, she raised it and the Mark to the Breach, allowing the energy rip out of her and finally close the giant hole in the sky. Once it was done, Bull was there to catch her before she dropped to her knees. “It’s finally over…” she whispered, leaning into the father of her unborn. Bull murmured to her in Qunlat before leading her away.

Her family would be safe, for now. For there would always be threats, but until those threats came, she would enjoy time spent with Bull while she was pregnant, and after she gave birth. She could only hope that whatever fool thought it would be a good idea to attack her family would never have to face her.

So this got A LOT longer than I thought it would! For my first time writing out a headcanon for my Adaar, I honestly think I did well enough explaining it. Though it became more of a one shot than a headcanon! I hope y’all enjoy!

[mama-m1na]

Of Queens and Drum Majors: Prologue

                                                    ~~~0~~~

I felt my body freeze as I took in the sight of what had happened a few feet away from me.

I had never felt a deep attachment to my parents but I would never ask for this. I would never wish for them to be killed right in front of me.

“Get that brat!”

Those three words was all it took for me to bolt back out of the doorway as fast as I could through the dead halls of the castle.

‘Where is everyone?’ I thought to myself as I weaved through my home, doing my best to avoid the people after me.

I had just caught sight of one of the guards in the distance but was quickly halted by a blast of light that was too quick for me to avoid.

When I opened my eyes I was lying on my back in the throne room before the stained glass mural of the Moon Goddess Mayari and the mace each ruler of Ibadora would hold.

It hurt for me to even move at this point and I could feel the blood running down my face and pooling at my back.

“Man, I almost feel sorry for this worthless kingdom,” laughed a foreign man as he walked closer, “This was almost too easy.”

I closed my eyes, letting the tears fall freely as they came closer with their swords drawn.

“Anak,” spoke a smooth, almost distorted voice, “Papayagan mo bang mangyari nito? Na pinatay ng mama et papa mo. Ano sila ma gawa sa tao mo?”

I opened my eyes and turned to the mural of our deity to see the full moon glowing brightly through the glass.

“Ikaw ng Ibadora, ano ikaw ma dawa na?”

I slowly stood up on shaky legs as my charred robes swayed with my movement, earning chuckles from the men behind me.

‘They sure are cocky for low lifes that couldn’t even face my parents face to face,’ I thought bitterly as I limped over to the stand holding up the mace, ‘Cowards is all they are.’

I could still hear their laughter even as I grasped onto the black staff, even as I felt a surge of energy flow through me as I turned to them with a glare.

They only stopped laughing when the energy had finally died down leaving me in a purple outfit with a light purple obi decorated with white peacocks and gold outlines as well as black fox ears a top my head with nine matching fox tails flicking angrily behind me.

“Do you wish to continue mocking this ‘worthless kingdom’?” I growled, gripping tightly onto the mace, stepping closer as I could hear the distant sound of the guards coming, “Your country must not have tried to invade before.”

“Sige, Anak, ipakita sa kanila ng lakas mo.”

“Do you understand the mistake you’ve just made?” I asked as the doors burst open to allow my guards to surround them, “Now I have one question for you which will decide your punishment.”

I could see the fear in their eyes as I stepped closer, the only sound being the click of my heels on the stone floors.

“Are you sorry for what you’ve just done?” I asked as I knelt to keep them focused on my gold splattered, brown irises.

I could practically hear their increased heartbeats before one answered.

“No.”

My ears twitched atop my head before I slowly stood back up with a frown and let out a deep sigh.

“Shame,” I said taking the mace in my right hand, “You would have lived if you had told the truth.”

My hair began to float around me as I spoke my command.

“Residing spirits of sorrow, malice, and revenge, I call upon you to heed my orders,” I said, tapping the bottom of the mace on the floor.

Even the guards faltered as before them two shadows rose from the ground before solidifying into two humanoid figures kneeling before me.

The pair were very similar in looks, the only differences I could find were their genders and length of hair.

“We have answered your call, My Queen,” both spoke in unison, “What do you ask of us?”

“Punish the murderers,” I ordered, pointing the ball of my mace past the pair at the three males looking up at me with wide eyes.

“As you wish, My Queen,” they both answered with a smirk before standing and turning to the three males.

“Well done, Anak.”

Three weeks later I was dressed in the same pink robes my mother wore just weeks ago as I was prepped for my coronation, the only difference was the light purple obi tied around my waist.

As I stood in front of my kingdom, waiting for the priest to place the crown on my head I noticed many representatives from our allied countries.

“Ingat ka, Anak, baka ma pagmamanipula ka.”

‘Alam ko yun,’ I thought bowing my head as the golden circlet was placed upon my brown.

To seal my status as the new Queen of Ibadora I was once again given the mace and as soon as it came into my hands it’s form changed slightly.

The once silver ball had turned gold and gold chains were wrapped tightly around the black staff claiming it as my own.

“Long live Queen Kitsami Verum Princeps Ibadora!”

As the festivities went on I interacted with many of my people and some of those visiting from neighboring countries to witness this.

It was quite overwhelming so I decided to step out to my garden in order to get some fresh air; however, that was quickly interrupted as two shadows dashed behind me and a yelp was heard.

“Kalungkutan, Malisya,” I called with a sigh before turning around to see the two spirits looming over a man from Espagne, “Calm thyselves.”

“My Queen,” the female called as her bright yellow irises turned down to meet my own, “Meron ng ahas sa hardin mo.”

“Alam ko yun pero hindi ko kayang magsimula ng isang digmaan ngayon,” I replied as the two backed off the foreign man. 

“We just want to keep you safe, My Queen,” the deep voice of Kalungkutan responded as  the spirits stood on either side of me.

I nodded before turning to the man and asked, “What can I help you with?”

“I would just like to know who your regent would be so I can report it back to my King,” the man spoke with a smile as the two spirits glared daggers at the man.

“Are you shitting me?” Malisya asked through gritted teeth.

“You do realize that question is extremely rude considering the fact Her Highness has just ascended to the throne, correct?” Kalungkutan asked.

“I mean no offence to Her Highness in anyway, it’s just that she is but a child,” the man tried to explain as my eyes narrowed.

“I am not a complete child,” she replied with a frown, “I have been through schooling all of my life in order to rule and I have various assistants and secretaries to help me if there is confusion.”

“I know that; however, you have a life ahead of you and you should live it through while you still can,” the man explained, chuckling nervously.

“Are you suggesting that instead of learning how to rule my country I stay ignorant and vulnerable?” I asked with a small grin, “That I leave decisions up to someone else who will most likely do things vaguely just because I’m young instead of seeing the situation myself and making decisions based on the evidence I have collected myself? Are you saying that I should stay weak and let another nation walk all over me?”

The man’s eyes widened as he heard my last statement and I couldn’t help but think, ‘Checkmate.’

“Right on the nose aren’t I?” I chuckled as I began to walk back into the crowded ballroom before pausing, “Just know if I catch anyone trying something like that there will be consequences.”

A few weeks later I was out with the two spirits checking on the nearby ports when I heard a fight.

Much to the irritation of my companions I got closer to find a man beating and screaming at a teenage boy. 

Both seemed to be foreigners but I couldn’t place where they were from.

“Excuse me,” I called somehow loud enough for everyone nearby to turn their heads.

“Y-Your Highness!” the man exclaimed with wide eyes before bowing and forcing the teenager to bow his head as well, “How can I help you?”

“Why were you beating that boy?” I questioned tilting my head to the side as I held my mace in my left hand.

“W-well, Your Highness, this rat stowed away on my ship and we just found him today,” the man explained as the teen tilted his head up to look at me.

“Might I ask where your ship is from?”

“Gallia, Your Highness.”

“I see,” I nodded, “Well, last question, what will happen to him?”

“He’ll either be locked in the brig, thrown overboard once we set sail again, or forced to work off the journey,” the man explained, “But considering his attitude I doubt it’ll be the latter.”

“Well,” I chirped, “I can take him off of your hands… If he’d like me to that is.”

“There is no-” “I don’t believe the offer was extended to you,” I spoke in a low tone.

“So?” I asked turning to the older male, “Would you like to join me?”

He simply nodded and I extended a hand to him as I felt the surprise from my companions. 

“My Queen, are you sure about this?” Malisya asked looking over my shoulder as I helped the boy to his feet.

“You don’t know what his intentions are, My Queen,” Kalungkutan added as I turned to walk back to the carriage with the boy following me.

“And waste his potential?” I asked with a wide grin, gripping my mace with both hands as I felt a surge of energy run through me, “I don’t think so!”

On the way back to the castle the boy sat across from me when I realized something.

“Hey, what’s your name?” I asked looking up at him with a small smile.

“Kagami, Your Highness,” he answered moving his hair out of the way allowing me to see how bad he actually was hurt.

“You don’t need to call me that,” I chirped as my eyes drifted over the rest of him and his injuries, “You can just call me, Kitsami!”

“Alright,” he said before giving a small smirk, “Your Highness.”

I let out a huff before taking his left hand, seeing that his wrist was quite swollen.

He didn’t say anything but watched with interest as I hovered my right hand over it and felt the energy return as a soft blue light came from my palms.

After a few moments I let the energy leave me and moved my hands away rubbing them together to regain some warmth.

“Any better?” I asked as he touched the now cold surface of his skin, “I can’t do anything about your other injuries sadly but I’m sure Kelxi can.”

A few months later I stood before three men who were sent to assassinate me with Kagami by my side glaring down at them.

“I’m assuming you’re from Espagne?” I asked boredly as I lazily held my mace with the ball pointed down.

They were silent as they only glared up at me and I turned to walk off.

“This kingdom will fall,” one spoke as I turned my head, expression not changing, this was the third set of assassins they had sent since I cut off trade with them, “And you shall with it.”

“You little-” I held my hand in front of Kagami, keeping him from ripping the heads off of the three foreign men.

“No kingdom lasts forever,” I spoke calmly, now facing them fully, “and the point of a leader is to try and make it last as long as it can, eventually dying with it. Just know that even if a kingdom is wiped off the map, a good ruler will make sure her people can escape the carnage and live on.”

“As queen I have accepted that role and I know I will eventually die with Ibadora,” I continued, crouching down to meet their height, “and I know my people will live on as long as I have anything to do with it.”

“Your Highness, there’s an emergency!” a maid exclaimed running into the room, “soldiers from Espagne have invaded Queson and taken all of the females!”

“When?” I asked through gritted teeth as my face contorted into an expression of anger as I turned to the doorway.

“Last night, Your Highness!”

I gripped onto my mace harder as I felt a rush of energy flow through me once again and ice began to climb up my hands and feet as my anger built up.

Taking a deep breath I tapped the end of my mace on the ground, summoning Malisya and Kalungkutan to my side.

“Yes, My Queen?” they asked kneeling at my right.

“So you’re using those demons of yours to solve your problems again?” scoffed one of the assassins.

“No, they’re here for you,” I chipped turning back to them with pinned pupils, “I’m going out to respond to your king’s declaration of war.”

Two years later, I stood before the king of Espange in my magical form at age fifteen, bloodied and face void of any expression as I held my mace in my right hand.

My army stood behind me, tired but still strong as we stood surrounding the bodies of the enemies.

“You really are stupid aren’t you?” I growled walking closer to the frightened male, “None of this needed to happen.”

“I gave you so many chances for peace,” I continued feeling tears start to form at the corners of my eyes, “and you ignored all of them all for the sake of your pettiness.”

“No one needed to die!” I screeched as tears began to stream down my face and as spikes of ice came dangerously close to the king’s face, “None of my people! None of your people! No one!”

“Before I end this once and for all I must ask, are you sorry for what you’ve done?” I asked, taking a breath.

The man stayed silent before an evil smile spread across his face and he began cackling.

“You’re still only a child!” he spat with a grin, “You cannot see that death is needed to advance your status. You have a powerful army and outrageous powers at your disposal yet you do nothing with them! It is not I who is stupid, Wench.”

The Ibadoran soldiers pointed their weapons at the fallen king as soon as the insult left his mouth but all the female did was glare before saying, “I may be the stupid; however, I still have morals and I can see this power has you consumed by greed. Your people will be better off without you.”

The last thing he did was cackle once more before large spires of ice impaled him.

I did my best to ignore the feeling of warm blood splattering on my face as my soldiers began to cheer.

The war was over.

I kept my people safe.

I did my job, so why don’t I feel any joy? Any relief?

Why do I feel so… hurt?

Another two years passed before I jolted up from my bed grasping at my chest, afraid my heart would leap right out, and gasping for breath as if I was a fish out of water.

Those images never failed to haunt me, I could never forget that laugh, and now I could never stop seeing how others would try to use me but not everyone is like that right?

I’m doing the right thing by being alive, right?

I have a purpose here, right?

I slipped a robe on and grabbed my mace before walking outside my room.

“It's like we're a bunch of lonely people, testing the limit to see how much pain we can bear,” I sung as I made my way through the empty halls, “Honestly I don't know how I got so far.”

“I did this to me, I did this to me, There is no one else to blame, I did it myself, I did this to me, I did this to me, I did this to me, I did this to me,” I continued as I came into the throne room, “I wish it was your fault, I wish it was your fault, but how could it be, oh, but how could it be, oh. I did this to me.”

“Sometimes I can't move at all, unless I'm certain that I'm following the right path, the right path,” I sang looking up to the painting of my mother in the pink robes of the queen, “In my dreams, you praised me and clapped. Then mommy said, ‘It's alright, there's always next time.’ ‘You did your best.’”

“It's like we're a bunch of lonely people testing the limit to see how much pain we can bear. Not too much and not too little,” I sang quickly leaving, walking down another hallway, “So the world feels much more familiar.”

“And the only reason I could carry on is thanks to my imaginary children, great-great-grandchildren singing in front of my 100th birthday cake saying they are glad, saying they are proud of what I've accomplished in my time,” I continued as I began to walk up a set of stone stairs, “It's all but a dream. It's all but a dream.”

“It's all but a dream,” I sang as the breeze from the roof met my skin.

“I did this to me, I did this to me, I did this to me, I did this to me,” I continued looking over the edge of the railing, out at my kingdom, “There is no more mommy, there is no more daddy.”

“I'll take it head on. Yeah I'll take it head on,” I sang swinging my legs over the railing, “Cause I did this to me.”

Then my world faded to black.

~~~Fin. Prologue~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Picture: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/436497388884726973/

Song Used: “Birthday Kid” by Mili 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[verdigrisprowl]

Operation: SPIRNGO. Part Two.

Soundwave hosts another meeting with Whirl, Prowl, and Tarantulas, this time to finalize the plans to repair and upgrade Springer.

The current plan: they’re going to infiltrate Debris, take out Roadbuster, and set up false readings so it looks like Springer is still in his berth; and then they’re going to bridge him to a locked-up lab in a half-abandoned Decepticon base where (they think) experimentation was done on how to create Phase Sixers, so they can use the old equipment to bond their small ununtrium sample to Springer’s torso.

They’re moving out within a week.

ItsyBitsySpyers 6:54 pm With Tarantulas too isolated, Prowl too imprisoned, and Whirl too topsy-turvy to host any meetings, it fell to Soundwave to once again provide the meeting place.

So there he sat, waiting at his usual Business Table, hands politely crossed and door locked because everyone coming could bridge themselves in. Or come as an avatar. Whichever. Whirl 6:57 pm Whirl bridges in near the ceiling, since he has to arrive in alt-mode, but he angles neatly towards the floor and lands rather neatly by the Business Table. He gives Soundwave a single nod, sits, and then just waits, silently. ItsyBitsySpyers 6:57 pm Whirl gets a single quiet nod as well. FakeProwl 7:01 pm Prowl's avatar appears exactly when the meeting is scheduled to start, and not a second earlier. If there's a seat left at the table that isn't next to Whirl, that's the one he takes. And then silently waits as well. ItsyBitsySpyers 7:03 pm Prowl gets a hello ping in private in addition to his nod because habit is habit. Now all they need is Tarantulas. FakeProwl 7:03 pm He doesn't move, and doesn't glance up from the random spot on the table he's decided to focus on; but he does silently return the ping. Whirl 7:06 pm After waiting a few moments he lifts his head, looks around, and eventually turns to Soundwave. "Is Tarantulas coming?" He doesn't actually sound annoyed. He doesn't sound anything; his voice is flat and dronelike. Tarantulas 7:07 pm Speak of the devil! There's a ka-clunk as someone tries to open the doors from outside. Then comes some knocking, which quickly escalates into banging. Soundwave gets a flurry of pings from Tarantulas. ItsyBitsySpyers 7:08 pm Soundwave just vents softly and puts his face in one hand before waving the other in the general direction of the doors. They're unlocked now. FakeProwl 7:09 pm Prowl glances at the door, but doesn't move to get it. Soundwave's place. Soundwave will get it. Tarantulas 7:12 pm Tarantulas goes to bang on the door some more, since Soundwave didn't ping him back, and he ends up stumbling and falling forward through the opening doors. Good job, spide. At least he manages not to fall COMPLETELY flat on his face, but it's definitely not a dignified entrance. ItsyBitsySpyers 7:13 pm Soundwave just. Shakes his helm into his hand and tries not to laugh. Serious topic, serious people, serious meeting. Also it's rude. Whirl 7:13 pm He swivels his head to stare, and then just nods towards the Business Table. Time to sit, spider. FakeProwl 7:15 pm A glance; and then it's back to that interesting spot on the table. Tarantulas 7:15 pm ...It would have been less awkward if they HAD laughed. Erk. Fluffed and ruffled, Tarantulas weaves his way over, hovers, then takes a seat where he can best half-curl-up in shame.

"Why did you lock the Primus-forsaken doors!?" ItsyBitsySpyers 7:17 pm [[Because he expected everyone would bridge in for secrecy reasons.]] He looks up and puts his hand back on the table. [[Never mind that. Are you ready, or did you need more time?]] Whirl 7:19 pm "I think we all waited long enough," he says flatly. "All right. I've touched base with Tarantulas and Soundwave. Where are you at, Prowl?" Tarantulas 7:20 pm A huff from Tarantulas. He certainly hadn't thought that through. FakeProwl 7:22 pm He blinks slowly. What, him? What was expected out of him? "I contributed everything to Tarantulas." A sideways nod. "What do YOU want?" He doesn't mean for it to sound aggressive. He honestly doesn't know what Whirl's expecting to get out of him. Whirl 7:26 pm "To make sure we're ready." Whirl returns his attention to Soundwave and Tarantulas. "All right. Tarantulas had a little talk with me about the procedure." A "little talk" that lasted several hours, courtesy of Whirl's relentless grilling.

"And Soundwave and I have gone over the security. We can get to him, and we can do what we need to do. You said we were taking him somewhere, right? What's the story on that?" Tarantulas 7:28 pm OH. Yeah. That. "HAVE you found somewhere with a sufficient chamber?" ItsyBitsySpyers 7:29 pm Soundwave holds a feeler up in protest.

[[He can -almost- do what he needs to do. But more on that after this.]]

Turns his head to look at Prowl. Whirl 7:30 pm Nods. Noted, Soundwave. FakeProwl 7:34 pm Prowl meant, specifically, what does Whirl want that Prowl can actually contribute.

But Whirl eventually got around to asking a question that Prowl could actually offer an answer to. (And then EVERYONE was looking at him. Primus.) "I have. The Constructicons were able to locate a Decepticon base which contains a lab that, while not actually the site of the creation of a Phase Sixer, WAS run by Rossum shortly before the first Phase Sixer was created. An investigation of the lab that was under Rossum's command revealed that it contains equipment that's similar to what Tarantulas has theorized would be necessary for the procedure. It's likely the Decepticons experimented with a prototype of the project there. The Constructicons were able to find this lab because they know someone who's still stationed at the base, but they tell me that shortly before the Surge, the base was reduced to a skeleton crew, and the unused labs are locked up." Whirl 7:36 pm "So, there are still 'Cons actively there? Should we take care of them before we settle in? Skeleton crew shouldn't be hard to put down." Tarantulas 7:37 pm Tarantulas looked instantly concerned. "There'll be mechs there in the building with us? Is that what we were planning on?" Fret fret. No risking his precious adopted son. ItsyBitsySpyers 7:37 pm [[Leave them be. If they do not harm us, they do not need to be harmed.]] FakeProwl 7:38 pm "I'd rather avoid them. Skeleton crew or not, any fight would risk damaging the equipment. Besides, the lab we'll be using is at the far end of a wing that's locked and not patrolled. I have a map." Tarantulas 7:39 pm "Do you have the specs for the lab as well?" To toss Tarantulas's way, of course. Whirl 7:40 pm He looks to Soundwave, briefly, and then to Prowl. There is no expression on what passes for his face. "...all right." "We'll all need that map, just in case, obviously. So, we've got a place to take him to do what we have to do--Soundwave, you said you had something else to add?" FakeProwl 7:42 pm "I've got the message that the Constructicons got from the person they asked about the labs. It doesn't contain specs, but it does contain a few pictures. And the map, of course." ItsyBitsySpyers 7:42 pm [[He will want that.]] FakeProwl 7:43 pm Ping to everyone. Have a map of a top-secret Decepticon base-slash-military research facility. "This map is, of course, classified." Tarantulas 7:43 pm A slightly disappointed noise from Tarantulas and some muttering about having to improvise, but he doesn't seem too upset. Soundwave 7:43 pm [[And, yes. He does have something to add.]] [[First: He has gathered most of the programs and trinkets he will need in order to deal with the majority of their security measures. What he still lacks is the medical data. He knows -how- to feed their equipment false readings. He does not know what those false readings should -be,- and we cannot afford unnecessary delays.]] Turns to stare Tarantulas down. [[You will give him what you have on Springer. This is not debatable.]] Whirl 7:50 pm He also turns to stare at Tarantulas. He’s not staring him -down- but he is joining the stare. Tarantulas 7:51 pm A slight squint from Tarantulas while he hesitates, then: “…What - what exactly do you need? Which readings?” Prowl 7:52 pm “It might be easier to steal that data from the Wreckers. Tarantulas would have no data on what readings Springer would give off now, with his current array of upgrades and mods.” Tarantulas 7:53 pm (False, but Prowl didn’t have to know that.) Soundwave 7:55 pm [[If he knows enough to plan the surgeries with a minimum of on-the-spot learning and to Whirl’s satisfaction, he knows enough.]] And Soundwave knows Tarantulas has some sense of what a modern Springer is like. He’s known that from near to the start. Incoming requirement list. [[But if it would put you at ease, he will see if he can recover something without being traced.]] Whirl 7:57 pm “Better to get them both, right? Cover all possibilities.” Prowl 7:57 pm “The fact that he knows enough that he’ll be able to quickly fill in the gaps of what he doesn’t know once he DOES have access to Springer’s body doesn’t mean he knows enough sight unseen to be able to fool whatever scanners are hooked up to Springer. Better to have both.” Soundwave 7:58 pm [[Both, then. But he insists on the base now.]] Prowl 7:59 pm A nod. Fine by him. Tarantulas 8:00 pm Tarantulas receives the list, skims it, groans internally, and slouches a little more. “I - yes, I can provide what you need. I’ll send you a packet when we’re done here and I have a moment to sift through his medical files.” ItsyBitsySpyers 8:39 pm [[Let him think, now. Security measures, medical data, location, surgery, ununtrium, Ravage and Roadbuster's stasis, potential threats... was there more?]] FakeProwl 8:40 pm It takes Prowl several seconds to process that. (Several seconds more than it should.) And then, he turns to give Soundwave a blank look. "Why are Ravage and Roadbuster in stasis?" Tarantulas 8:41 pm Roadbuster? W-what? Tarantulas totally forgot Roadbuster wasn't dead in this universe, but - what? Whirl 8:43 pm "Not Ravage. Just Roadbuster." Whirl pauses, glances to Soundwave, and then back to Prowl. "Y'know, maybe we should just begin at the beginning. Run through everything as we know it?" ItsyBitsySpyers 8:43 pm Soundwave motions to Whirl. By all means. It'll save him the time of writing. FakeProwl 8:44 pm For a moment his gaze wavers back and forth between Soundwave and Whirl as he tries to figure out which one of them is about to explain, before he gives up and looks back at the table. Whirl 8:44 pm He cycles a long, deep breath as he gathers his thoughts. "All right. This is the plan as I understand it:

"First thing we need to do is get into Debris and get Springer without being detected. I've told Soundwave everything I know about the security, but we gotta be prepared to think on our feet, because it's several years old." He glances up and pauses when he sees Prowl staring at his table.

Whirl separates his claws and cranes his neck forward, thumping a single one on the table in front of him. "Prowl. Pay attention." FakeProwl 8:48 pm Prowl jerked back from the thump. "I'm—? I am?" Whirl 8:50 pm Whirl stays that way for a moment, his helm thrust forward, staring blankly. "And once we're inside, we need to isolate Springer." As he speaks, he gradually straightens back into a normal position.

"Odds are good it's going to be Roadbuster assigned to looking after him. We need him out of the picture, so Soundwave suggested we knock him out while he's asleep--to make sure he doesn't wake up before we want him to."

At last, he interlaces his claws again. "We've got Ravage on that." Tarantulas 8:52 pm (Good thing Soundwave's not in Tarantulas's head right now. There are definitely memories of Roadbuster's last moments flickering through his mind.) FakeProwl 8:55 pm It takes much longer than it did for Whirl to straighten up for Prowl to stop leaning away from him. "How?" ItsyBitsySpyers 8:59 pm [[Frenzy is... acquiring... some emergency anesthetics from the hospital. Ours,]] he adds, in the hopes it'll keep Prowl from protesting much. [[It should be simple enough for Ravage to sneak into Roadbuster's quarters and install them. They're designed to be user-friendly.]] Whirl 9:01 pm "Mostly, it's just for insurance. I'd rather not fight anyone on Debris if we can avoid it." Especially Roadbuster. But he's not saying that aloud. FakeProwl 9:03 pm A moment of silence (too long a moment) as Prowl contemplated that. "... It's extremely risky. If Roadbuster detects Ravage before he gets the anesthesia in, or if the anesthesia doesn't kick in quickly enough once it's injected, he could kill him." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm [[It is.]] Believe you him, he thought about it. A lot. [[But if Roadbuster comes to check on his charge without us realizing it, the three of us will be in more danger.]] FakeProwl 9:09 pm "So why not send somebody who isn't at risk?" Prowl asked. "If one of you with a holomatter projector installed is on Debris, I can project through it. I can resize my avatar and recolor it to camouflage with the background, and if Roadbuster DOES detect me—what can he do to me? Pop my hologram?" Whirl 9:10 pm Whirl tilts his head slowly, but doesn't say anything for now. The others can speak up first. Tarantulas 9:10 pm "That's - that certainly sounds doable." Better than what Tarantulas was about to suggest, a.k.a. that he should do it instead. "I've been meaning to update your avatar anyhow, a few edits should be a piece of oil cake." FakeProwl 9:13 pm Edits? Hm. Doesn't matter now, he supposes. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:16 pm Soundwave just. Stares. At Prowl. For a good long little bit. Roadbuster can do an awful lot of things that will permanently send Prowl away if he squawks about the attempt to the wrong mech.

On the other hand, it means the chance he'll lose a deployer while helping Prowl's creation and a known enemy of Unicron's will be slashed by at least a third.

Deployers come before others. And it's. Prowl offering that is--

He looks down at the table and bobs his helm.

[[Thank you.]] ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm And then, belatedly:

[[...If Whirl agrees.]] FakeProwl 9:18 pm A small nod. Whirl 9:18 pm Whirl's perspective on the matter is somewhat similar. Moreso than the sound logistics of the plan, along with the fact that Prowl can't really do anything to Roadbuster while he's a hologram are good reasons to agree--not to mention the fact that Prowl can change his avatar in a way that could not only make him unidentifiable, but invisible.

But at the end of the day, he's more inclined to be agreeable for the simple fact that he likes Ravage, and doesn't want him to get hurt. This message has been removed. "Yeah. Sounds good." These words are delivered with the same dronelike flatness that every other word has been. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:20 pm His helm turns just enough to the side to make it clear he's talking to Whirl, but he's mostly still looking down at the table.

[[...Thank you, too.]] Whirl 9:21 pm His antenna twitches, but that's the extent of his response. "Right. So, after we knock Roadbuster out, Soundwave's got some plans for the surveillance." FakeProwl 9:23 pm His lowered gaze redirects slightly in Soundwave's direction. Tarantulas 9:24 pm Tarantulas leans slightly toward Prowl as an aside. "Don't forget to shuffle your avatar specs to me sometime soon, then?" FakeProwl 9:25 pm A small nod. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:34 pm What? Yes. Right. He does.

[[...Trade secrets. As long as you are all quiet, wait to enter until he has cleared you, and do not leave the designated area, he should be able to hide our entrance from them. They will be unable to see, hear, or sneak up on us while he is within his own frame.]]

[[Do not disturb -anything- you are not responsible for touching while he is in Springer's mind. He cannot be there and account for other mechs' errors at the same time.]]

And the deployers can only handle so much. They don't communicate with different systems the same way he does. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:35 pm [[He must also be last to leave.]] FakeProwl 9:36 pm Do what he's told to do, don't do anything he isn't told to do. Simple. A nod. Whirl 9:37 pm Whirl also nods. "Right. You got it." And now his helm slooowly turns to regard Tarantulas. He stares. Your turn to agree. Tarantulas 9:39 pm Geez, what's with all the STARING today?

"But of course." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm Well, for one thing, he expects Tarantulas to be first to mess up the "don't touch anything" rule. Whirl 9:41 pm Nods. "Good. So, after we secure Springer, we're going to move him, yes? To this place of yours, Prowl?" Tarantulas 9:41 pm "It's hardly HIS place, hyeh." FakeProwl 9:42 pm Is there any need to reply to Tarantulas's comment? He supposes not. Everyone knows the place doesn't belong to Prowl. "Yes." Whirl 9:43 pm "And we're going to not only fix him, but basically soup him up so that he's a lot harder to put down next time." He knows there's more detail to this, but he already went over it with Tarantulas. Tarantulas 9:45 pm "NEXT time? There will be no next time." Whirl 9:45 pm "That's the idea." FakeProwl 9:45 pm Tarantulas didn't directly answer Whirl's question. "Yes." There, question answered directly. Tarantulas 9:46 pm Tarantulas nods. Whirl 9:47 pm "And after that... if everything goes well, he'll be good as new. Now, are we planning on keeping him under and returning him to Debris? Or are you lot going to try and talk to him after? What's your plan?" ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm [[If Springer returns to Debris, it cannot be with his help. He will be too tired to ensure the same level of security.]] Test runs. Lots and lots of test runs. FakeProwl 9:50 pm "There's no point in trying to sneak him back in—if we're knocking Roadbuster out, once he wakes up they'll know that something happened to Springer. That's an argument neither for nor against returning him to Debris; but if we DO return him to Debris, there's no need to worry about maintaining the same level of stealth." Whirl 9:50 pm "So the question is: do you want them knowing you were involved?" FakeProwl 9:52 pm "That's a completely separate question. But I see no benefit to their knowing of our involvement and multiple benefits to their not knowing." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:52 pm [[Springer will know he was involved. There is no way around that. But he would prefer the others did not.]] FakeProwl 9:52 pm "He'll remember?" ItsyBitsySpyers 9:53 pm [[He might. Even if Springer doesn't remember, he -will- be standing there.]] FakeProwl 9:54 pm "So blindfold him." Tarantulas 9:54 pm Tarantulas gives a small laugh. Whirl 9:54 pm "I'm not going to be there when he wakes up." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm Soundwave huffs softly.

[[He doubts a Wrecker will take well to being blindfolded in a room filled with strangers.]]

[[Where will you be, Whirl?]] FakeProwl 9:56 pm "It would be best for none of us to be there when he wakes up. However, we do need to ensure he CAN wake up before we return him. Is there any reason why we can't wake him up just long enough to ensure that he'll be lucid, and then immediately anesthetize him?" He tilts his lowered gaze slightly toward Tarantulas. Medical questions are his field. Whirl 9:56 pm "Nearby, maybe. Just outside the door. Near enough to make sure you don't do anything drastic. But not... there. With him." Tarantulas 9:58 pm Tarantulas hums. "No, I - I suppose there's no reason why not. But -" Nngh. That's the last thing Tarantulas wants to do. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:00 pm [[That would work even better. He is fine with that.]] Thank Primus. He'll have to try to obscure his mental projection, and that'll make him even more tired, but... at least he won't have to fight off a Wrecker who knows an ex-Decepticon has been in his head. Whirl 10:02 pm "As long as it doesn't do any damage, I've got no problems. So, just to clarify--I'm a little foggy here--you're going to verify that he -can- wake up, and assuming he's all good, where do you plan to leave him...?" FakeProwl 10:03 pm "I suppose we might as well open a bridge to Debris and roll him through. Either that, or find a safe abandoned facility leave him in, and comm Debris with the coordinates so they can go pick him up." Tarantulas 10:03 pm "Can I -" Tarantulas starts, then stops. "What - what if -" ....No, he shouldn't. Damn it all. Whirl 10:04 pm "What?" Tarantulas 10:06 pm Tarantulas fudges what he was going to say. "There's - there's no way to follow up on him medically, should something happen - I think - he should stay in - in our custody." Whirl 10:06 pm "We'll return him to Wrecker custody." "They'll handle it from there." FakeProwl 10:07 pm "As much as I'd prefer for us to be able to safely follow up on him medically, we'd be essentially keeping him prisoner while he recovers. That's unacceptable. Returning him is the best option. If need be, we can spy on him to ensure that everything's going well." ItsyBitsySpyers 10:08 pm [[...He can leave something for that.]] Whirl 10:08 pm Whirl nods at Prowl. That's reassuring to hear, even if he only sort of believes Prowl's being genuine. "Besides, Springer's a huge public figure. Once he's back up, word'll get out. His recovery's not going to likely be a secret thing--no." "No, Soundwave. We don't need to spy on them after this. We're already pushing it." Tarantulas 10:09 pm "He - a prolonged stay could be voluntary! With a backup plan for if he chose not to remain." There's a tiny bit of a whine in his voice. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm ...All right. He'll bow to Whirl on that one. Whirl 10:10 pm And now he returns to staring at Tarantulas, his helm thrusting forward again. "No." FakeProwl 10:11 pm "For his stay to be voluntary, he'd have to know who's keeping him. Not only does everyone in this room except for you not want that, but Soundwave would be endangered by it." Tarantulas 10:12 pm This message has been removed. FakeProwl 10:13 pm He turns toward Whirl. "I DO think we should spy on him, if only for a bit. We don't necessarily need to bug him but we need to know if something does go wrong that only we know how to fix. If there ARE complications, there's no way Debris would willingly release that knowledge." Whirl 10:14 pm His optic contracts a bit, then expands. Then contracts again. It's anyone's guess what THAT means. "...you have a point. But if you do this, then I get the same info you do. All of it." Tarantulas 10:14 pm "But we wouldn't NEED to spy on him if he were in custody, which I'm - there's certainly a way we could work out such a thing." More a question than a statement. Whirl 10:16 pm "Out of the question. He belongs with the other Wreckers. End of story." FakeProwl 10:16 pm "We're not going to keep him captive a second longer than is absolutely necessary to repair and upgrade him." FakeProwl 10:18 pm To Whirl, he nods. "You'll get the same info." Prowl isn't even sure if he's telling the truth. (And certainly nobody else would be able to read that off of him; for someone with an actual, fully-functioning face, he's been no more expressive than Whirl to night, either physically or verbally.) Whether or not he's telling the truth doesn't matter; in either case, agreeing to Whirl's terms is the only acceptable answer. Tarantulas 10:19 pm "We're - for goodness' sake, we're kidnapping him, performing invasive surgery on him, invading his MIND, and then knocking him back into stasis so he doesn't even know who did it - the LEAST we can do is - is -" ItsyBitsySpyers 10:20 pm [[Do what? Tell him what we did so the list of suspects can be immediately narrowed to the most obvious?]] FakeProwl 10:21 pm "We're doing what we have to do to fix him and make him safe. We're not going to do a single thing beyond that." Tarantulas 10:22 pm Tarantulas is internally choking. How in the world can he try to argue what he wants without spilling too many beans in all the wrong directions? Whirl 10:22 pm "He's not going to be traumatized by it. He won't need anyone to--to coddle him afterwards. He's Springer. Trust me--I've known the guy for millions of years." Tarantulas 10:23 pm "I wouldn't coddle him! I'd - I'd /inform/ him." FakeProwl 10:24 pm "There's nothing he needs to be informed of." Whirl 10:24 pm "He doesn't--exactly. Honestly? It's best that we just let him get on with his life." "He's missed enough as it is." FakeProwl 10:25 pm A small nod. Tarantulas 10:27 pm "Just because we're going to be infringing upon some of his patients' rights doesn't mean we have to do so with all of them! He - he deserves to know what he'll be!" ...Who he is. Whirl 10:28 pm "You can leave a note, or something. I don't know why you think that kidnapping him is somehow infringing on his rights LESS." Tarantulas 10:29 pm Weakly: "He can't ask questions that way." "....You're.... nevermind." Whirl 10:30 pm "We'll have a bug. Send him an anonymous message or something." FakeProwl 10:30 pm "He doesn't..." ... Prowl falls silent. Whirl 10:31 pm "He doesn't what?" Tarantulas 10:31 pm Tarantulas will come up with a new plan. It's pretty obvious to him he's not getting anything he wants right now. FakeProwl 10:32 pm He doesn't answer Whirl's question. And, after a moment, he stands up, and starts quietly pacing behind his chair. Whirl 10:33 pm He doesn't press it, but he follows Prowl's progress with his helm as he paces. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm [[Some things are not meant to be questioned.]] [[He has his life back. He was not harmed. He will be watched, one way or another.]] FakeProwl 10:34 pm The pacing continues. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:36 pm [[If he truly needs to know something, it will get to him another way.]] Tarantulas 10:37 pm Tarantulas's ire is rising, but he - he can't. Instead he feigns defeat. "Do what you will. Cart him back off to Debris. I - I can assist with that myself if necessary." Whirl 10:37 pm "If he goes missing, I'm coming after your ass, spider. This is the part where you get fair warning." ItsyBitsySpyers 10:38 pm [[But he must be let go to find who he is. Even deployers leave, after a while.]] Tarantulas 10:41 pm "Don't, with the cliches," Tarantulas suddenly snaps. Whirl 10:42 pm Whirl stops watching Prowl to look at him. For a moment, just a moment, something almost like anger enters his voice. "I'll do whatever I damn well please. You heard me."

It's gone almost as quickly as it appeared. FakeProwl 10:42 pm Prowl stops walking. And, staring at the floor, speaks: "Imagine waking up one day to be informed that your body has been irreversibly modified without your consent." A moment of silence. He's sure that's a hypothetical that most of the room can strongly sympathize with. "Now imagine if, on TOP of that, nobody can tell you who did it, how they did it, or why they did it. What reason do we have that's adequate enough to justify doing that to him? How is it BETTER to do that to him?" Tarantulas 10:44 pm ...Did Tarantulas win Prowl over. Did he just. FakeProwl 10:44 pm "I don't want Springer to know we're involved." He turns slightly toward Whirl. "You don't want him to know." And toward Soundwave. "YOU don't want him to know. But how is the fact that we DON'T WANT HIM TO KNOW more important than what that lack of knowledge will do to him?" ItsyBitsySpyers 10:45 pm Soundwave's tempted to lean across the table and swat Tarantulas for calling what he said a cliche. Tarantulas didn't even know enough about deployers to fully understand what he was getting into when he agreed to help with Zori. He wouldn't know whether they do or don't leave.

But Prowl is there, and Whirl is there, and violence won't help.

So he sits and listens to Prowl instead, and curses to himself. Whirl 10:46 pm "He'll be alive, which is more than he was before we stepped in. Yeah, it's not the gentlest way to do things, but you can't always be gentle."

He waves a claw. "Look, if you want to drop him a line and say, 'Hey, you want to know what this is all about? Come see me.' or whatever, that's fine. But let him come to you. Kidnapping him and holding him somewhere, -away- from his allies, isn't the right way to do it. Let HIM come to you." Whirl 10:47 pm "Besides, you're basing all of this on the assumption that you all can be trusted to do what's best for him when you have him in your custody. I absolutely don't trust you--" A nod to Prowl. "Or him." A not to Tarantulas. "And I trust none of you more than the Wreckers." FakeProwl 10:48 pm "No, no, I'm absolutely not talking about keeping him our custody. That's COMPLETELY off the table. Just—making sure he doesn't have to WONDER what happened to him." He took a deep vent, and let it out. "Yes. I think... Leaving him with the option of making contact himself is ideal." Whirl 10:48 pm "Yeah. I'm completely fine with THAT. That's not a problem at all." Tarantulas 10:48 pm A prolonged vent from Tarantulas. Damn, and he thought he had Prowl there for a moment. "At the very least." ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm [[He should not be told until he asks because knowing before he is ready may lead to -all- of us being killed. The Wreckers cannot trust a member of their own who has had a Decepticon in his head. If they cannot trust him, and he continues to fight with them, it risks his life. And if we are - whatever would happen - as a result of him knowing before he is ready and able to handle the data, then there is no-one left as experienced as we are to help him should something go wrong.]] [[He will agree to the method of contact, but that is because he already did. He said the information would get to Springer one way or another.]] FakeProwl 10:52 pm A nod. "We stick to the original plan, then. We drop him off either in Debris or in a safe place where they can pick him up. And we leave him—and him alone—a way to contact us and find out what happened, if and when HE decides he's ready to find out." Whirl 10:53 pm Whirl also nods. "Sounds solid to me." Soundwave's points were good ones to begin with, but he cemented Whirl's acquiescence to them by hinting that alternatives could put Springer in danger. "There's honestly no need to drag me into it, though. There's nothing I could tell him that you guys can't--and I'm not a doctor." "He still doesn't need to know about my involvement. It's not that big of a deal." ItsyBitsySpyers 10:55 pm [[He deserves to know that you wanted to help. And you deserve to be recognized for your loyalty.]] Finger tap. [[You are... rarely given the credit you are due.]] FakeProwl 10:56 pm "... Which one of us is he going to be given a line to contact, then?" Whirl 10:56 pm "I can tell you're trying to appeal to my pride, Soundwave. It's not going to work." ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm [[Then your senses are off. He is merely speaking his mind. He's known to do that.]] [[He offers to observe, but the contact should not be his. If one of you wishes it disguised, he can arrange that.]] Whirl 10:57 pm His antenna pins back and he just looks away. Soundwave should honestly be thanked for his kindness, but Whirl doesn't know how to handle that even when he's in a good state of mind. "And what would you suggest, Prowl? -I- be his liaison?" FakeProwl 10:58 pm "I'm not suggesting anything. I'm asking." As not only an Autobot, but also the very Autobot that everyone would EXPECT to do exactly this sort of thing, Prowl would be the most reasonable option. But Prowl doesn't want it. Prowl is holding out hope to find a reason to cease existing, and being Springer's one and only contact put a kink in that plan. Whirl 10:59 pm "Well, it can't be me, because he's going to notice pretty quickly that I'm not there. And he's going to be told WHY I'm not there. And he's not going to want to talk to me." Tarantulas 11:00 pm "Why does it have to be someone he KNOWS?" FakeProwl 11:01 pm But as an ex Decepticon, Soundwave couldn't be chosen. And if given half an opportunity, Tarantulas would take advantage of a direct line to Springer to tell him things he shouldn't know. Only Whirl and Prowl are options. Whirl 11:01 pm "It would probably be a little less disconcerting. Sorry, Tarantulas, my vote is Prowl. We used to work more or less under him--it wouldn't be a huge adjustment, in the end." FakeProwl 11:02 pm A slow nod. It was, in the end, the only logical option. Tarantulas 11:02 pm "If - well then, why does it have to be only ONE person?" Whirl 11:03 pm "I never said that. I don't have any issue with you speaking to him, or anything." FakeProwl 11:03 pm "If anything happens to me before Springer makes the call—the line will have to redirect to you, Whirl." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:04 pm Soundwave watches Tarantulas from the corners of his optics. He can smell personal tension on Prowl and Tarantulas' horizon later for that one. FakeProwl 11:04 pm Yeah, well, hopefully Prowl won't be around for it.

He returns to his seat, and resumes staring at that same spot on the table. Whirl 11:05 pm Whirl pauses, and then cycles a deep breath. "About that. That brings me to something else--timetable. We need to get this show on the road, because I might not be available soon." "And, you'd better hope that nothing happens to you, because if I become unavailable I'm not likely to become... un-unavailable." Tarantulas 11:05 pm "I - what?" ItsyBitsySpyers 11:05 pm Prowl will forgive Soundwave for hoping that hope doesn't come true.

He's listening, Whirl. Do go on. Whirl 11:07 pm He doesn't intend to go on. That's it. FakeProwl 11:09 pm Oh, Primus. Don't tell him they're BOTH suicidal. Prowl looks up at Whirl, and for the first time that night something actually emotive slips into his gaze—something a little bit conspiratorial, a little bit sympathetic. The corner of his mouth twitches.

And he drops his gaze again. "So Tarantulas can be second back-up." Tarantulas 11:10 pm "You can't just - that doesn't -" ...Don't argue, Tarantulas, you're getting what you want. Shh. Whirl 11:11 pm Whirl meets his gaze, but it's anyone's guess what he thinks of that. "Guess so." Another pause. "So try not to beef it, I guess."

Now he looks to Soundwave and Tarantulas. "How soon do we think we can move?" ItsyBitsySpyers 11:14 pm [[He can be ready within the week. He needs only to account for the medical data and set up his absence from work to look like he is still there.]] Whirl 11:15 pm "A week should do. Yeah. You guys?" Tarantulas 11:15 pm A moment's hesitation, glancing sideways at Soundwave. "Technically I'm prepared as soon as I've prepped for the particulars of the given lab and have my materials in line, which should be - well. Days, at most." FakeProwl 11:15 pm "I can move at any time. Literally any time. Give me the word and I can arrange a non-fatal workplace accident in under ten minutes." Tarantulas 11:16 pm "Not - not a REAL one?" FakeProwl 11:16 pm "I'm hardly going to get out of work with a FAKE broken leg." Tarantulas 11:16 pm A cringe from Tarantulas. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:16 pm [[Please, do not put yourself in the hospital again.]] [[There are cleaner ways of withdrawing you from the public optic.]] FakeProwl 11:17 pm "I'll ensure it's something Hook can fix." Although he doubts Hook will be WILLING to fix it. No need to share that detail until after Springer's been resurrected. "... Well, if you can arrange something fast enough." Whirl 11:18 pm "Prowl's got an entire team of people looking out for him--he'll be fine." Tarantulas 11:18 pm "Please, Soundwave." He's imploring you. FakeProwl 11:19 pm "Don't inconvenience yourself. You should be preparing for Springer, not wasting time ensuring that I'm as comfortable as physically possible as I skip work to help wake him up." Tarantulas 11:20 pm A quick turn toward Prowl. "No, no, we can use your upgraded, updated avatar instead, you don't have to get YOURSELF hurt." FakeProwl 11:21 pm "I don't have an avatar of my real body and you're not going to waste time making one just for this." Whirl 11:21 pm "It's not that big a deal, you two." Whirl's not even spiteful, a broken leg hardly registers as any sort of injury in his mind. That is a plan he'd be happy to do himself, were he in Prowl's place. "There are multiple people heavily invested in Prowl's well-being besides the two of you, you know." he looks between them with a brief, knowing look. "Let's focus on the important thing, which is the mission." FakeProwl 11:22 pm "Agreed." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:23 pm [[He does not want Prowl's attention hampered by the pain of a broken leg, or the medicines required to dull that pain.]] [[Roadbuster and a safe entrance depend on him not being drugged.]] [[But, yes. The mission.]] Whirl 11:24 pm "A broken leg doesn't hurt THAT bad. We're used to being roughed up around here." FakeProwl 11:25 pm "I can shut off my pain sensors in each limb separately." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:25 pm Debates saying that Prowl spent much of his time OFF the field, but is tired of arguing that. And, that answers that, he supposes. Fine. If he can't stop Prowl finding ways to hurt himself now, he'll just - do something about it later. [[Fine. Move on. Is there anything else?]] FakeProwl 11:25 pm "AND it's nearly impossible to feel your body while your holomatter avatar's on." Maybe that's true or maybe Prowl's just become very good at ignoring his body. Tarantulas 11:26 pm "/Prowl/. You can't just -" ItsyBitsySpyers 11:26 pm Soundwave smacks his arm down on the table.

[[ENOUGH.]] [[Are we moving soon or not.]] Whirl 11:27 pm "So, excepting the finer points of how Prowl's going to--" He pauses, glances and Soundwave, and carries on. "--get himself out of the public eye, are we good?" Tarantulas 11:28 pm Tarantulas has to keep himself from hissing at Soundwave, or anyone else, really. "Quite. Positively golden." FakeProwl 11:29 pm Prowl starts at the smack.

"... But if we move after I get home from work, I'll have fifteen uninterrupted hours where nobody will be expecting me to be anywhere but inside my apartment. Otherwise, I'm—good. No further issues." Whirl 11:29 pm "That's not a bad window to aim for. My schedule's wide open; guaranteed privacy is better than likely privacy." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:30 pm [[-Thank you.-]]

[[Then it is settled.]] And with fewer broken legs than he thought they were going to have. [[Good.]] Tarantulas 11:31 pm Suddenly: "Is there anything else? Otherwise I'll be going." He's already starting to stand up. FakeProwl 11:31 pm "I don't have anything else." Whirl 11:32 pm "Nope. Seeya." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm [[When he and Tarantulas are both finished and rested, we will go. And no, he knows of nothing else. Except for Prowl, who must be made part of a different plan.]] [[Goodnight, Tarantulas.]] FakeProwl 11:32 pm "Who must what?" Whirl 11:33 pm "You're our new Ravage, in short." FakeProwl 11:33 pm "Oh. That plan. Yes." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:33 pm [[Yes. You will require updating. Please stay for now.]] FakeProwl 11:33 pm A nod. Tarantulas 11:33 pm No goodnight for Soundwave in return. Tarantulas stands tall, ruffles briefly, and makes for the exit. Tarantulas 11:34 pm There's no way he can be around these three mechs any longer without getting in a yelling match or possibly hurting someone, and right now that's the last thing he needs. Whirl 11:35 pm Whirl hops up. There's an unspoken request in Soundwave's words for Whirl, and he will obey, and let them be alone. "Call me if anything changes. I'll do the same." ItsyBitsySpyers 11:35 pm [[He will not hesitate to tell you.]] Whirl 11:37 pm He shifts into alt-mode, arcs away from the floor, and bridges himself out; a blue vortex appears before him, and he is gone. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:39 pm Soundwave waits until he is certain both are gone and rubs his crest. This had almost turned out to be more irritating than Decepticon command meetings of old. If Springer were anyone else's creation...

(txt): Request: stand, come here. FakeProwl 11:43 pm He might be looking down, but he's got enough peripheral vision to catch that rub. He's not sure what he did this time to earn it and he's too tired to replay the conversation and check.

Well, whatever dressing-down Soundwave is about to give him, he's certain he deserves it. He stands and comes there. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:53 pm He waits to rise until Prowl is standing as close as can be expected right now and looks the foot and a half up at tired blue optics, quietly wishing he could make what's driving Prowl to embrace jumping off of ship rails and face punch dents and broken legs disappear with nothing but a wave of his feeler.

But he can't. As hard as he's trying, he can't do it unless Prowl wants to help.

He can still be thankful that one part of Prowl hasn't been completely consumed by this, though.

(txt): Prowl offered self, removed highest deployer death chance. Reminded others Soundwave: endangered, if involvement discovered.

(txt): These--

To Pit with it.

(txt): Contact permitted? Yesterday FakeProwl 11:55 pm Prowl hesitates a second as he tries to figure out where this is going. Those don't SEEM like things Soundwave would criticize him for—

Oh. This is a—thank you? "... Granted." ItsyBitsySpyers 12:04 am Soundwave's in Prowl's space in a blink, arms and feelers wrapping tight around him. They squeeze Prowl in a ferocious, crushing hug - the sort that suggests he could easily kill a mech this way if he wanted, and probably has - and, as he straightens out of his slouch, lifts him a little.

Not as much as he said he would do back in the hospital. This isn't the time for that. It's just the side effect of his standing up. But it's enough to prove that his cold, serious demeanor from earlier has been abandoned in favor of this moment.

His fans hitch. He sets Prowl down again and presses their crests together.

(txt): Apologies, if excessive. Deep gratitude earned. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:07 am One Prowl helped kill Ravage. Another has probably just saved his life. Funny how the multiverse works. FakeProwl 12:15 am Prowl's so surprised that he forgets to hug back—and for a moment, his optics flicker to life with... something. "Something" is a whole lot more than they've had for the rest of the meeting.

But then he wraps his arms tightly around Soundwave in return. This is the first touch from someone else he's felt, REALLY felt, in weeks. Like he's actually there.

Once he's set down, he presses his crest a little harder against Soundwave's, trying to feel a little of that pressure again. "I... You're fine. It's fine. Thank y—er, you're welcome."

He considers saying something about how... it was only sensible, only logical for the person who could take no harm to take over a more dangerous duty, or how it would have been wrong NOT to point out that Soundwave was in a more vulnerable position; but Soundwave already knows that, doesn't he? ItsyBitsySpyers 12:26 am He does know that, and he values Prowl's choice all the more for it. One, because Prowl still cares enough about others to make a protective decision, and two, because he actually followed through on it. There hasn't been a whole lot of that in Soundwave's life over the last few million years.

He's more than happy to press against Prowl's helm as hard as Prowl wants. Let him bust a biolight. If it happens, it happens. He'll get it fixed.

(txt): Off-work solution also appreciated.

(txt): Soundwave--

Everything he wants to say is screaming and rioting and trying to shove itself through the translation door all at once, so he just leaves it there and gives another, smaller (but still somewhat tight) hug.

(txt): Prowl plan portion sent across comm tomorrow. Frenzy: not returned, cannot explain use yet. FakeProwl 12:35 am "Honestly, I don't know why the off-work solution wasn't self-evident. I said I CAN leave at any time, including in the middle of work if necessary. I never meant that the middle of work is the ONLY time I can go." Figures that when he assumed Plan A was obvious and started planning for contingencies, everyone thought his proposals for Plan B WERE Plan A.

Is the plan complicated enough that it needs a translation? Or—oh, it's not that. Frenzy is the one learning medical skills, he probably had to explain how to administer the anesthetic. "I'll wait for the comm. If it needs to be explained in depth, you know what times I'm available. Anything outside of work or Metroplex." He'd break a leg for Springer, sure, but he isn't volunteering it for just another planning meeting. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:42 am (txt): Situation: tense. Upsetting content: easiest noticed. Errors made.

(txt): Soundwave knows schedule. Will modify comm volume levels during transmission.

He won't subject Prowl to Frenzy's yelling while Frenzy's not there in person. There's no need for that.

(txt): Addition: Expect hard light projection file, more instructions. FakeProwl 12:45 am Was it tense? Prowl hadn't noticed.

"Appreciated." While Prowl will put up with Frenzy's volume in person because he knows Frenzy can't help it, he would much prefer to not have to. If Soundwave didn't offer to turn the volume down, Prowl would have done it on his own end. "What's the projection file for?" ItsyBitsySpyers 12:49 am (txt): Hiding bridge until Soundwave arrives, takes control. Less direct security interference, less discovery risk. FakeProwl 12:52 am He tilts his head, thinking. "So you'll have me go in first and conceal your arrival. I'll have to be piggybacking off of Tarantulas's holomatter avatar, then—out of the three of you, he's the only one who can get onto Debris without creating a similarly-obvious bridge." ItsyBitsySpyers 12:53 am Nod nod.

(txt): Speed necessary. Tarantulas not trusted alone long. FakeProwl 12:53 am A quiet sigh. "No, he's not." ItsyBitsySpyers 12:55 am (txt): Other things. Not this.

He bunts Prowl's helm again.

(txt): More explained tomorrow. Go, rest. Must attempt medical data recovery. FakeProwl 12:58 am Prowl dims his optics as he bunts Soundwave back. Affection tag: ping, ping, ping.

"I'll be waiting for your comm." ItsyBitsySpyers 1:00 am This message has been removed. ItsyBitsySpyers 1:08 am That's not the first time Prowl's sent him a trio of pings. It's starting to make a pattern of activity. Why the change?

He pings affection back - just his usual once, though - and nods.

(txt): Until then. FakeProwl 1:10 am "Until then."

He steps back and out of Soundwave's touch, and disappears. ItsyBitsySpyers 1:12 am Soundwave watches the place where Prowl was for a second longer, still thinking, then shakes his helm and heads upstairs. Work to be done. Puzzles later. Oh, and he'll lock the doors on the way up.