#and I feel like these characters despite whether you're coming from book or show canon would have a first kiss WAY WAY different than that

[shehungthemoon]

Sorry I absolutely HATED that kiss why did Michael Sheen decide to act it like that 

[satubby]

◇Yandere Concept◇

•○ 《Ryu Shi-Oh》 ○•

『This is just my own concept but not the general and true view of the character as a yandere, although canonically he may or may not present these... behaviors』

〔Warning ⚠️: This may or may not contain Spoilers for the show in question, please do not read it if you have not yet seen the mentioned K-Drama. In addition, somewhat sensitive topics such as child abuse, drugs, mentions of sex and among others will be included.〕 Postscript: There may or may not be spelling errors, misplaced character pronouns (I'm dyslexic) so I'm sorry for the inconvenience because this was written at night and I was sleepy, and I'm not a fan of English, so this might be bad.

A puppet of the Russian mafia, Ryu Shi-oh is ruthless and unscrupulous. Depending on how you have met him, he will treat you differently. He would most like a Darling who is as lively, positive and almost like the protagonist of the K-drama where he comes from.

》☆ Obsession:

Ryu Shi-oh will take quite a while to trust you, since he has the police and other enemies after his head. However, if you're the gentle type (if you go all in with this yandere, it would be best for both of you), he'll see you as his emotional refuge, the only source of light in his dark life, though that doesn't mean it won't take a little effort for him to be open to you. Despite his yandere tendencies, he feels a desperate need to protect that vulnerable part of himself by sometimes seeming distant (or perhaps he is at first).

Once he is aware of his feelings for you, then things will change (not much but at least he won't always be on guard with you). You will see him as shy, loving (in his own strange way). Of course, he will be somewhat slow in his feelings but VERY loyal once he is sure of them.

》☆ Obsessive Control:

Russian mafia upbringing has instilled in him either consciously or unconsciously, a need for absolute control and even to the point of violence. Ryu Shi-o monitors every move you make (that's only in his facet of having just met you), from his daily interactions to his friendships. Since if it's at the beginning of getting to know you, he wants to make sure there are no betrayals or double-crosses on your part.

On the other hand, if you've known each other for a while, then his vigilance will be more about getting to know you in depth since he is somewhat clumsy in interactions (other than about his work or murder). He will know everything about you, even things you may not even remember. What kind of flowers you like, X item you've been lusting after and so on.

》☆ Dark Gifts:

To express his love, Ryu Shi-oh tends to give you expensive and luxurious things (When he is getting to know you they are more like decoys) But then he gives you things that you might like, as I mentioned in the previous post, but often these carry a hint of double interactions (He stressed, Ryu Shi-oh doesn't trust people much, he has traumas.... Someone get this man some therapy for god's sake!!!).

》☆ Intense Jealousy:

The thought of losing you arouses a fierce rage in Ryu Shi-o. He can become possessive and jealous, going to extreme lengths to keep you tied to his side. His traumatic past contributes to his constant fear of being abandoned or betrayed, he horribly hates lies (This is Canon by the way, he said so himself).

Since he grew up in a precarious and horrible environment, his concepts of love are null to say the least.... he doesn't know anything about the real meaning beyond what is written in books or Google. So when his jealousy is present, he usually lashes out in anger because he doesn't understand or know how to handle his emotions well, that's why he is always stoic and avoids emotional contact with others.

He thinks at the beginning that these emotions are a weakness (because of his upbringing obviously) so you will understand his attitudes and actions at the beginning.

Back to the scenario (depending on whether you work for him or otherwise were Nam Soon's sister, so to speak). However it was, before and after he met you until he gained your trust, his jealousy is powerful and terrifying.

For example, if you deny him or are somewhat alien to his feelings (ahem! Nam soon) then Ryu Shi-oh may or may not threaten those you hold dear or end up killing the subject of his jealousy if provoked enough.

He may or may not send you videos of it, who knows, he's a fucking mafia-bred man.

》☆ Demonstrations of Power:

As CEO of Doogu, Ryu Shi-oh uses his influence and resources to protect you from his enemies, though also to investigate you, but often does so ruthlessly. He uses his position to eliminate any perceived threat (whether real or not, as in the case of being jealous), regardless of the consequences.

When it comes to, for example, demonstrating how happy you could be (excluding that he is a mobster and has a front business for the real thing, drugs) he can afford a whole restaurant for just the two of you or go on trips when he is not busy.

Also when it comes to dealing with you, depending on whether or not you agree to go out with him, he will use his resources. Either way you will end up with him (if you don't want innocent people hurt).

》☆ Hidden Insecurities:

Despite his confident facade, Ryu Shi-o harbors deep insecurities. Fearful that the reader will discover his dark side, he struggles not to show his vulnerability. This can manifest in moments of emotional self-isolation. More common when they are getting to know each other, refusing to accept their emotions more as a passing interest.

When he already falls for you, he refuses to see you leave him for someone else (Or when you don't want more than a friendship) He clings to the feeling you give him or your kindness/courtesy. He has never felt the comfort you give him, you treat him as human and not the tool the Russians used.

》☆ Future plans:

Although his methods are questionable, Ryu Shi-oh looks for love in you. He sees in that relationship an opportunity to find peace and redemption for the sins of his past, even if his actions may be morally ambiguous. He really is a yandere who would give everything for you, though of course after fulfilling his goals.

Since he has experimented on himself, his strength is inhuman and that may or may not lead to use on special occasions... special occasions. Going back to his plans with you,if you behave just by staying out of it, you will have a dream life.... On the other hand, if you are a treacherous liar like Nam Soon (Ryu's own words) Even if he loves and cherishes you, he won't go easy on you.

He will first take it out on your loved ones, then ruining your life until everyone forgets you even exist.... Only then he can stop being angry with you, he is cynical about it.

He will tell you: "But Honey! You did that to yourself... You shouldn't have betrayed me, I gave you everything, I trusted you with my secrets and you were a spoiled whore..... Accept the consequences, only then can we forgive each other."

》☆ Violence as a last resort:

Although he doesn't hesitate to resort to violence towards his subordinates (regarding the real drug business) He never uses it with you as he doesn't want you to see him as someone bad, he tries to keep it as a last resort (We already gave vast examples of which situations can lead him to that) The contradiction between his desire to protect and his ability to be brutal reflects the complexity of his character.

You will always see him as the suave and polite gentleman although distant in his interactions, but as you get to know him better he is just someone traumatized and hurt by his past (He doesn't justify his current actions but he explains why) He never touches a hair on your head if you treat him well (Ryu Shi-oh has the philosophy that his enemies he treats harshly and his allies worse or something similar, what do I know I am just a brat of 18 years old).

》☆ NSFW

》☆ This will be short, but having sex with Ryu Shi-oh is the most sensual thing you could imagine. I won't add much because I need to learn more about the character, well he likes to bite and scratch. He will be slow and very gentle with you when starting this, but when he gets excited like every man he loses his mind and you may or may not end up with whippings or broken bones given his superior strength (literally).

》☆ Ryu loves when you suck his cock or his neck, his favorite parts of your body are those where he can squeeze (female breasts or buttocks). He likes to suck your breasts and play with your neck. His cock is introduced slowly so when you are ready, he gives you everything he has.

》☆ In the end, you will end up tired but satisfied (Unless you have done wrong and Ryu is angry when making love, there it is not smooth and he could even take it out on you due to his jealousy) Afterwards, the care he gives you is soft and sensual, always apologizing for breaking some bones.

In general, having a yandere like him can be a double-edged sword. Ryu Shi-oh can be so kind or cruel depending on your reactions and treatment towards him. It's like swimming on nails, you have to watch where you're going or you'll end up getting hurt.

This is all independent of the K-drama "Nam soon Super Strong Girl" since it is merely my interpretation of this beautiful villain who, from my perspective, didn't deserve so much pain even though he brought it on himself in the end.

[For those anons who asked me for something, I promise that as soon as I get my ideas together I will start writing because I am a mess at this. I could barely do anything right with this yandere concept.]

[jacky-rubou]

(Warning: long ask ahead, but I just have so many thoughts on something you mentioned).

I saw your reply from earlier where you gave your opinions on The Book of Bill. Just wanted to let you know you're 100% not alone on the Bill and Ford thoughts. It honestly kinda bothers me too that the fandom is latching onto the "lol uwu toxic old man yaoi" thing. Like there's so much more to the book and Bill and Ford as characters but it feels like a lot of folks read it and mentally threw out everything but shipping bait to obsess over.

It especially feels ick to me because Bill and Ford's relationship - whether people read it as platonic or not - is legit 100% abusive, and it tramples all over the growth Ford's had healing from that. I almost kind of wish the book hadn't made those jokes at all, because when a creator gives a fandom a shipping inch, fandoms take a whole mile with it. No hate to Hirsch for what the fandom is doing; it's not his fault. But it's honestly annoying, just like you said.

on the spectrum of long and short asks, this one barely reaches medium, anon (lighthearted)

but yeah. I really think the parts relating to their abusive dynamic were some of the most realistic portrayals of an abusive relationship we've seen, platonic or otherwise. and that is really special for something I wasn't expecting to go into this much depth with the cruelty and abusiveness of their relationship for. literally a lot of heart dropping moments with bill showing off just how sadistic and cruel he was to ford. emotionally, mentally, and physically.

the ex jokes dropped on bill were laughable and not something to be taken as hard canon proof that they were in a romantic relationship like the fandom is seriously rolling with. like, come on, this is bill's book we're talking about, he's trying to look good for the reader. and making himself seem sympathetic by using that moment in the bar is the way he decided to do that. maybe it really happened like that, and bill was sad about losing ford, but... they're kinda trusting bill's word over ford's here, aren't they?

It's really something that the fandom decided to play up the sad ex narrative to the umpteenth degree and i shouldn't be this surprised that my filters are working overtime right now, but man. I wish the abusive nature of bill wasn't just thrown under the rug in favor of stupid toxic yaoi jokes like you said. I wish ford's status as bill's victim wasn't downplayed over 'oh, he just wanted to fuck the triangle' jokes like no. just... no.

a microcosm of this is that drunk ford moment. a lot of the fandom is seeing it as this cute gay moment or what have you, when it's implied quite heavily that bill coerced/forced ford into getting intoxicated with the very phrase 'i am not much of a drinker' on the page before. and if you're taking that 'one thing led to another' phrase as something a bit more... risque... then, you're potentially looking at sexual assault. that is fucked up to hell and back and i only see a few people talk about it like that. (of course people are free to see this moment however the hell they like, i just... man. I don't know. I really don't know.)

anyway, fandom's gonna fandom. i just really wish it wasn't in my face all the time despite my best efforts to avoid that sort of thing with my filters.

[cdaae]

Hi, I know this is long but I wanted to talk about this, cause I don't think I can on my personal account. Reading everything about the POTO author is very disappointing to me. I read the first book and looked forward to the sequel. I did have some qualms about the two characters of color and I was concerned in how one of them perpetuates the "Woc is only there as support for their white friend" trope, but I was hoping this would get improved with the sequel. As I've been going through the sequel though, more of my concerns are being validated. There's frequent use of slurs regarding mixed-race people and said character is still only used as character development for Christine. Also, despite the author claiming they created Christine to be relatable to all people, its very hard to imagine her as anything but white/white passing when confirmed characters of color in the series are constantly degraded and dismissed for being Brown and Black. Now reading all the history regarding the author, I'm not surprised the characters of color are being treated this way. As a Black phan that loves Phantom immensely, it's sometimes hard being in this space and even being an e/c shipper when a lot of the aesthetics in this franchise are focused on whiteness and associating it with purity and good. While this series alone has its issue, I do think its important to note that a lot of Phantom work has issues regarding race whether its stereotyping (Kay) or erasure (ALW) so its a little unfair to single out this one creator. However, maybe this could be a good opportunity in analyzing the racial issues regarding this franchise as a whole! I'm genuinely thinking of writing my own version of POTO with e/c being poc because it's a perspective not explored yet

Thanks for listening! Love your account!

I don't necessarily feel it's unfair but she's also not being singled out for her racism in a phantom work but rather the fact that she's not only racist but a serious bully and is continuing both of these behaviors using her work and her platform. Race is definitely a phandom issue, but it's not the only issue with this particular author. Not to take away from anything you said though- you're absolutely valid in your assessment of the phandom.

The fascination with Kay has always bothered me- I could never get into it because of the problematic elements, but it's still something you have to be aware of when navigating the phandom because it's so popular. I actually think it's quite funny because this author dislikes Susan Kay but they're extremely similar- Older women clearly horny for the phantom and clearly writing with ALW in mind claiming to be adding on to Leroux but just making a mediocre book that doesn't fit in his canon at all with some added racism for good measure.

And yeah, her Christine sounds lifted out of ALW, and honestly, so does the phantom, since she still gave him a white mask. She also seemed to argue that Christine should be a brunette in the show because it looks better on women of color over blonde and that didn't sit right with me. Women of color with dark hair keep the "Christine look" according to her.

I'm disappointed but not surprised that the second book has the same issues. It's such an unnecessary thing to add to a phantom story. Meanwhile she had a video a while back essentially bragging about adding pocs and queer characters to her story like she's making strides for representation.

I do hope you write your poc phantom. Our phandom does need more representation, but it needs to come from the right place. You might also enjoy Music of the Night by Angela Ford. I haven't read it(yet), but I was told that Christine is black and the cover art supports this. But I don't think I've seen one where Erik and Christine both are poc.

Thank you for voicing your thoughts and please let me know if you write that story <3

[bwaldorf]

If you're still doing "send me a character", Jiang Cheng or Nie Huaisang 😁

yes, i absolutely am! 😁 thank you, kendra 💕 

> JIANG CHENG

how i feel about this character

it was definitely ... a Journey with jiang cheng, as you well know. it’s partly bc of how he’s initially set up in the plot at the beginning vs then going back in the past and coming to understand his character more. i really started appreciating and loving him more in my 2nd rewatch. so while i’m still signing this man up for necessary therapy, i really appreciate the depth his character has and how despite his issues, he’s a good person who just can’t always show it super well hhhh

all the people i ship romantically with this character

huaisang .. idk when sangcheng grew on me this much but i actually really like them! they’d be a very cute couple

xichen .. im not HUGE on this ship. it’s a solid good one, but i’m not very personally attached to it

my non-romantic otp for this character

wei wuxian ... something about their bond specifically (in cql esp) REALLY gets my heart. they really deserved better, even though things didn’t end off terribly

yanli .. bc the yunmeng trio is actually something that can be so personal

huaisang ... even without looking at their dynamic through a shipping lens, they have such a fun friendship and i wish they interacted more in the present timeline </3

my unpopular opinion about this character

no idea if it’s unpopular but i honestly think cql’s jiang cheng is the best. (which is funny bc i used to really have a bone to pick with him in my first watch .. i still do but it’s different. more out of love than before) in my opinion (thus far anyways, since im still reading the novel) it’s the most nuanced depiction of his character. still lov him in the donghua and what i’ve read of the novel so far but cql jiang cheng is just .. chefs kiss. i just really love how you can tell despite his anger, he really really cares about his loved ones

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon

a better reconciliation with wwx at the end :( it was really melancholic and im glad they got to Kinda talk things out but i wish it was different, even if him and wwx couldn’t be the twin heroes of yunmeng in the way that they originally envisioned

we talked about this, but it’d have been very amusing to me to see him on those blind-dates mxtx mentioned bc i wanna see why this man is flopping in his love life so bad

also would’ve loved to see jiang cheng (and lwj tbh) post-wwx death. in mdzs and/or cql, it just would’ve been heartwrenching but kinda touching to see him coming to terms with his part in that and also what led up to him keeping chenqing

im also curious as to whether or not he actually tortured people who practiced demonic cultivation or not. bc i remember seeing an interesting post on here once about how maybe he didn’t and it was kinda his way of trying to find out if wwx was still alive </3 

> NIE HUAISANG

how i feel about this character

absolutely loved huaisang from the jump! he’s an absolute sweetheart and such a good, loyal friend. i care him 🥺 i’d have loved him a lot just as he was but then seeing who he became post-nmj’s death .. golly! i think it just added a lot to the character that i really enjoy. his character development is an underrated one i think about a lot

all the people i ship romantically with this character

jiang cheng ... for the reasons mentioned above! friends to lovers is always a good, solid dynamic

wwx ... i don’t actively ship those two but i think if lwj wasn’t in the picture, i could’ve absolutely seen these two together maybe? 

my non-romantic otp for this character

nie mingjue ... i really enjoy their bond! (still gotta see the fatal journey which i know’ll probably solidify this for me even more) though nmj’s a lot stricter with him in mdzs, they really do have such a nice dynamic. nmj cares about him so much T_T and despite him being intimidated, i know nhs respects him a lot too

wwx .... YEP! y’all get it, im sure & i don’t need to explain. but i truly truly love those two a lot and the slight growth we see in their dynamic as well in the present. i.e. that fan scene where wwx genuinely compliments his interests rather than poking fun at it like he did in the past :’)

jiang cheng .. bc friendship <3 u get it and im too lazy to write more

meng yao ... now ... don’t persecute me. and this is very cql-centric but they were like brothers :( and even in mdzs, you can tell meng yao did care about him in his own way before shit went sideways. ofc #nhswasright at the end though but it’s just sad to think about what a better dynamic it could’ve been if things had been different

my unpopular opinion about this character

erm .. i don’t really have one! i just would like everyone to remember that despite him being silly and a bit stupid (complimentary) sometimes, he’s also super smart and perceptive. even if it isn’t always Book Smart, he’s still a very capable character. like ............. in terms of interpersonal perceptibility (idk if that makes sense, if not just roll with it), i think he’s quite comparable to wwx

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon

would’ve been obsessed to see more of his #Plotting both during the plot of the present as well as in the years of wwx’s death. like i would’ve loved to see him really setting the gears into motion as well as figuring out jgy’s role in everything. like i think i just would’ve really loved to see WAY more from his pov. i get why we didn’t in cql/mdzs but god am i obsessed with seeing smart characters work

would’ve also been really into seeing him with his saber. not using it necessarily (though him trying to practice with nmj overseeing it would’ve also been neat) but having him grapple with the complicated nature of the nie clan cultivation would’ve been very cool

i love how a lot of this is just .. i wanna know how nhs’s mind works more. like the scene with jgy’s hat at the end of cql, i’d have been superrr into what he does post-canon. in mdzs i believe it seems like he was maybe vying for the chief cultivator position and i think it’s doable in cql too so I Would Like To See It

some of this stuff is probably covered in fatal journey so im very excited for that

also .. am curious as to whether nhs’s position as clan leader would’ve changed post-canon. like would he have shown how capable he is or let people still think he was just a pushover 

oh ALSO one more thing . where is nhs’s bird ... i think we all would like an update 

send me a character? ✨

[iamanartichoke]

As you're definitely the "more in character than the canon" fanfic writer, I was wondering if you have any advice for a noob fanfic reader who wants to try their hand at writing, but feels they don't know any characters well enough to write fanfic of them. Despite consuming tons of media, I feel like the only characters I know well enough to write about are those in my own works. But I would love to write fanfic because I know it would help improve my writing! Any advice would be appreciated!

I’m sorry it has taken me a couple of days to answer this,honestly I’m so blown away by this descriptor that it’s made my brain freeze upa little, lmao. Also I feel like I’ve answered a couple of asks about getting intowriting fanfic, but I can’t find them to save my life, or I’d link them; I’msure I was in a much better brain-space when I wrote them, so I apologize ifthis response falls short.

First of all, I think it’s awesome that you want to startwriting fanfic to practice writing. Everyone starts somewhere and fic is a safeplace to start because playing in someone else’s sandbox kind of gives you acushion to practice with characters/settings/ideas that are more fleshed outthan what we might be able to come up with on our own. However, I alsounderstand what it feels like to feel more at ease with your own characters,because you don’t have to worry about knowing them well enough or portrayingthem correctly – they’re yours, and by default however you write them is alwaysgoing to be correct.

That said, I want to stress that I really don’t think there’sa wrong way to write fanfic. Bydefinition, fanfiction is used to explore characters that we love in a waythat, for whatever reason, the source material doesn’t allow. Whether it’sfleshing out a character that is given limited time and development on screen,or if it’s to take our favorite characters and put them into situations that wewant to see, we’re creating something beyond the limitations of the establishedcanon and the freedom and ability to have “wiggle room” is an inherent part ofwhat fanfic is.

Loki is especially good for fanfic because he’s somultifaceted and complex and there are a lot of ways to explore that. Ofcourse, Loki has a history and a basic personality, but even those things varydepending on the particular incarnation of Loki you’re interested in – MCU Lokiis different from Marvel Comics Loki is different from myth Loki.

We take the core idea of who Loki is and we expand upon it inour own fics, and not all of the interpretations are going to be the same. Andthat’s okay – it’s great, even, because fic never feels stale or overdone, evenif the plot is one that’s been explored before. In all the fic I’ve read, I’vecome across a lot of different interpretations of Loki that all, in thecontexts of their stories, ring true. Some Lokis are funny and sly; some Lokisare quiet and withdrawn. Some Lokis take more liberty with his mischief andtendency toward manipulation, especially when it comes to Thor; some Lokis focusmore on the emotional vulnerability that he displays when he’s been wronged orwhen he feels unstable. And so on and so forth.

Sadly, the Loki we were given in Infinity War very much didnot feel like Loki, and that’s because the core of who he was had been changedso drastically due to the writers trying to shoehorn him into a plot thatbetter served other characters. At his core, Loki is not foolish, and yet thewriters chose to have him make a foolish decision (to attempt to kill Thanoswith nothing more than a knife, rather than using any of his powers). Loki hasnot been shown to come to terms with his very complicated history with Odin, either,yet the writers chose to have him declare himself “Odinson” before his death,as if he magically reached that point all by himself.

The flaws in the writing, in the case of Infinity War,happened because Loki was handed over to  writers who either fundamentally did notunderstand the core of who Loki is, or they seemed to deliberately have Loki dothings that went against his established character because otherwise, theirplot wouldn’t work. (Which is kind of telling of the quality of writers – but,I digress.)

My point is, as long as you don’t fall into the trap ofdisregarding the core of Loki (or whichever character you’re writing ficabout), your interpretation can’t be wrong. It only starts being wrong when, asin the case of Infinity War, the character is undermined and sacrificed for thesake of a larger plot. Fortunately, that’s not really a thing that happens infic – or if it is, I have yet to see it. (Which is also kind of telling aboutwho should be hired to write for Marvel and who shouldn’t be – but, again,digression.)

This is getting very long-winded and I apologize. tl;dr: myadvice is to consider the character that you want to write about and just gofor it. If you’re consuming large amounts of media, then you probably havepretty good ideas about who these characters are – whether you’ve watched themovies or the shows or read the books or whatever the case may be. Don’t getcaught up in worrying about whether your version is “in-character” or not; itprobably is, and interpretations vary. 

Also, allow yourself the room to explorethe character and let the character shift and change as you learn more aboutthem (or if you had ideas about them that you later changed your mind about). When I started writing Loki fanfic, with Sanctuary, I jumped inhead-first with literally no idea what I was doing. I liked Loki and I had avague idea in my head, based on the movies, and it just started spilling out. I wasn’t on Tumblr yet andI hadn’t yet really been exposed to theories and headcanons and meta, and Ithink I was literally halfway through that story before I started to feelcomfortable with my version of Loki and started smoothing out some of thekinks. 

So literally, just go for it and have fun with it and enjoy yourself andthe story you want to tell, and you’ll be fine.

Thank you for the ask!

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 3x19 Choices

aka everyone’s just dying to give each other a piece of their mind

Welcome to this dailyish text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and rant about it in 10-3k words. What you can expect: long run-on sentences and disjointed observations, often focused on one tiny detail about the episode. What you shouldn’t be expecting: actual reviews that make sense.

And I’ve been waiting forever for today’s episode to finally discuss some quality Willow and Faith feelings... And it turns out that it was just a 2-minute-scene all along? Still, we’ll be making the best out of those 2 minutes, folks.

There’s actually a lot going on in Choices, but I want to get the main rant out first, before I get lost in all the small details of it.

So... Willow and Faith.

Fun fact, did you know that that is actually the 5th most popular BtVS F/F pairing tag on Ao3? Right after the popular canon, the popular “it’s basically canon and you can fucking sue me” ship, the pairing of the two main female characters (shout out to the Wuffys, I got you) and the less popular canon ship.

Which... wasn’t really what I was expecting? I mean, I also wasn’t expecting #6 being Faith/Dawn (having a 2 fic-lead on the ultimate OTP because you’re all heathens), so I guess I know nothing.

Some of those switch though if you filter for the F/F category, look, I have charts:

(Meanwhile Buffy/Kendra has like 12 fics, you really are all heathens.)

Anywho, thanks for coming to my Ted talk about the math of Buffy femslash. Now, back to Willow and Faith specifically.

Once I thought about it, it did make sense that this is actually a popular fandom pairing I guess? On one hand, it’s a common denominator situation, as in note which characters pop up consistently on that chart... On the other hand, in this episode alone Willow taunts Faith to which she responds by punching her and threatening her with a knife... And that’s pretty much how foreplay works as far as Faith’s concerned.

Faith just likes it rough, okay? Remember the screencap I used for Consequences after Buffy punches her?

I rest my case.

But I’m already way off topic here. Because what I was actually planning on talking about initially was how Willow felt about Faith, and the source of those feelings.

I already pointed this out, but I feel it’s worth repeating - Willow’s dislike of Faith goes back to two episodes in particular: Bad Girls and Consequences. As far as I was able to discern this time during my rewatch, there were no previous signs of animosity between the two preceding that two-parter.

In Bad Girls, Buffy blows Willow off for their study session to go out with Faith, and starts rambling about how Willow and Xander wouldn’t understand anyway what she and Faith do.

Willow is deeply hurt and jealous... She actually blows Buffy off too in return when she tries talking to her at school in the next episode, and only listens once Buffy shows up crying at her doorstep not knowing what to do about the whole Faith killed a guy situation.

In the same episode, Xander lets it slip that he and Faith had sex... And Willow is once again obviously hurt and jealous. She even has a good cry about it in the bathroom.

And I guess that that seems like a stronger emotional response than how she reacts to Faith stealing away Buffy from her, but it’s still coming from the same place. Note her line in that episode when she acknowledges her biases:

I'm not the most objective, I know. I kind of have an issue with Faith sharing my people.

“Sharing my people” - she’s pointedly talking about both Xander and Buffy here.

And there is a specific kind of betrayal that she feels from Xander, and that’s going to translate to pretty much all of Xander’s relationship... But at this point, it’s not really about her wanting that relationship with Xander. She had the option and she rejected it.

Still, if Xander has that with someone else, that makes their shared experiences feel less special. It makes her feel like less special in his life. (Which unfortunately tracks with a lot of Xander’s behavior about how he’s always chasing the new, shiny and unattainable thing in his life.)

Meanwhile with Buffy, Willow is mostly supportive of her relationships... up until to the point that she feels like they’re taking up the space that she occupies in Buffy’s life. And that very much happens with Faith in those moments, as Buffy suddenly feels like she can’t share with Willow what she and Faith has. (I swear, I’m not even trying, these sentences just turn out this way.)

So... yeah. Willow is super pissed at Faith for having the audacity to try and take away her people from her, and then hurting the both of them.

And I guess we can see some of that same kind of jealousy with Faith (I can and I will read parallels into Willow and Faith’s characters, just you wait) and her whole thing with Buffy and Angel in Choices... Except it’s weirdly misdirected? Like is the Mayor and the show seriously trying to tell us that Faith is jealous about Angel not wanting to make out with her, when that whole thing was all about Buffy in the first place?

Really, Mayor Wilkins? Really?

Well, I guess he is evil.

Back to Willow though, we have this scene where she gets taken hostage, and after she murders her vampire guard with a pencil (amazing), she decides to get comfortable in the Mayor’s office and read through all 5 tomes of the Books of Ascension??? It’s such a delightful nonsense.

Of course, I’m definitely with her on the whole “knowledge is power” notion. Even if they were to prevent the Mayor from having this Box of MacGuffin, there’s no way to tell if that would actually stop the Ascension. But knowing what’s to come and what they could do about it? That’s a definite win.

The issue is that as Faith puts it, being caught red-handed while gaining that knowledge makes Willow some very strong murder material for the bad guys. She could’ve just put the books in a bag, and tried escaping with them, or get the hell out there the moment she discovered those sensitive pages.

But do you know what I think? I think Willow just wanted to have the chance to confront Faith. She was ready to die just to give her a piece of her mind.

Willow: It's way too late. You know, it didn't have to be this way. But you made your choice. I know you had a tough life. I know that some people think you had a lot of bad breaks. Well, boo hoo! Poor you. You know, you had a lot more in your life than some people. I mean, you had friends in your life like Buffy. Now you have no one. You were a Slayer and now you're nothing. You're just a big selfish, worthless waste.

That’s commitment.

Notice also how she highlights Faith having Buffy in her life and not appreciating it enough to keep fighting. I do feel like Willow is deeply offended by that. I talk about her jealousy a lot, but her commitment to the people she loves is usually her more dominant character trait. Feeling like Faith stole her friends from her hurt her; but her anger mostly comes from the fact that Faith hurt Buffy and Xander in unimaginable ways.

I guess this episode did give me a lot of Willow feelings.

Someone else who shared Willow’s need to impart some wisdom in the most inconvenient times was the Mayor. And honestly? I didn’t care a whole lot about it. Angel and Buffy has a million other conflicts that come before him being immortal.

Like, I get that it’s supposed to shake them out of their own little bubble a bit, and face the fact that they don’t really see a future together. I believe the phrasing I previously used was that being together prevents them from becoming the people they want to be.

Their initial exchange at the graveyard is kinda hilarious though. “You never take me to any place new” - I’m still laughing, ngl.

At the same time, Xander and Cordelia still appear to be having their bitter verbal conflicts. Which is weird, especially after Earshot, an episode that I praised for including Cordelia in the group once again. (I guess maybe Earshot was written with a different place in the season in mind for it initially? I know that it didn’t air when it was supposed to too, because of the school shooting aspect...)

Here, the two of them are once again out to get each other. Even Buffy ends up in the crossfires, as Cordelia aims one of her pointedly cruel jabs at her. Yikes.

But we also find out here that Cordelia is working in a dress shop now, so there’s that.

And this episode of course is also about everyone’s futures. Willow decides that despite being accepted into literally every school ever, she’s going to attend UC Sunnydale with Buffy. Not just to be with her, but because she enjoys saving the world and all that jazz.

Oh, Willow, if you only knew...

This of course also presents a welcome contrast for Buffy, who feels like she doesn’t have a choice but to stay in Sunnydale. It’s a really nice moment between them, as Buffy realizes herself that she too very much made that choice herself. Because that’s who Buffy is. Someone who could never turn her back on the people who need her.

Buffy:  I kinda love you.

We all do, Buffy. Just ask Oz, and his decisive ingredient smashing move that annihilated the whole argument about whether or not they should rescue Willow. (”That’s your future wife!” - me @ Alexis Denisof in that scene.)

Also, shout out at that whole Mission Impossible heist premise we got going on in this episode. I always appreciate a weird clash of genres.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

If you're still doing them, The Unexpected?

Short opinion: The meat of this book (i.e. everything that happens in Australia) is so interesting that I really really wish the plot had gotten there faster.

Long opinion:

I love how #44 opens: as of the very first page, the kids are already in the middle of a pitched battle at an airport for their very lives and the future of the planet.  I’ve mentioned I’m a sucker for the Batman Cold Open (#41, MM4, #50, #5, #19) even though in the case of this series it’s less likely to be “the heroes save a random guy in an alleyway” and more likely to be “the heroes stagger home from a horrific battle, newly traumatized and unable even to tell their parents about it for fear of being made into controllers” because that’s Animorphs for you.  By this point in the series it’s a refreshing change to have the characters skip the familiar opening steps (Erek hears about a new yeerk thing, the kids interrupt a normal school day to help Erek deal with the yeerk thing, Ax and Rachel advocate blowing up the new yeerk thing, Marco and Cassie come up with directly opposing reasons not to blow up the yeerk thing, Jake calls for a vote about the yeerk thing, everyone is filled with self-doubt while debating the moral implications of the yeerk thing, Cassie pulls a wacky new morph for everyone out of her ass to exploit the weaknesses of yeerk thing, Narrator of the Week wonders if s/he is the only one who has trouble keeping him/herself sane in light of yeerk things…) and instead get right down to brass tacks.  

Don’t get me wrong; I understand why most books in the series simply cannot open mid-battle, because if they did then there’d be almost no room for characterization or setup.  This series does have the enormous advantage of having an overall coherent plot (or eight or nine overall coherent plots, depending on how you chart it), logical character development for all six protagonists and several of the supporting characters, and a consistent tone throughout—while also allowing readers to pick up the series anywhere and read the books in any order.  However, I also like the sense that the kids are becoming a lot more competent at figuring out how to respond to what yeerk threats in which ways as of this point in the series, not bothering with too much debate when instead they could focus on kicking butts and taking names.  

It’s super frustrating, then, that this book opens so powerfully mid-battle… and nevertheless wastes a ton of its slender 150-page length on getting Cassie to Australia.  While I understand that it would be strange and disappointing to have a book that simply had several of the Animorphs not appearing in the story (this isn’t AniTV, after all), the airport sequence drags on for a long time in an effort to establish the other five protagonists while also explaining how Cassie ended up separated from the group.  After Cassie ends up alone and off to SYD (I will forever be amused by her speculating that she’s going to South Y-Something Dakota, and anyone who disagrees can fight me), the book nevertheless wastes quite a while establishing Cassie’s debate about whether to steal from people’s luggage, her quest to find a few oranges, her elaborate ploy to fool the yeerks into thinking that she got sucked out of the plane, her not-so-elaborate ploy to appear demorphed in front of two hork-bajir-controllers that she ends up killing accidentally on purpose, and her moral hand-wringing about the fact that she killed some people in self-defense.  

And yeah, I get that it takes a long time to get from the U.S. to Australia, but does this story really have to take so goshdarn long to get from the U.S. to Australia?  

Anywhoo, when Cassie’s finally through the looking glass, what she finds there in Oz makes this book’s place in the series very interesting.  She once again excels under pressure when left to her own devices, making use of the environment around her and her above-average people skills to blend in, dig in, and take yeerks down.  She and Yami have undeniable chemistry together, and despite her Clueless American refusal to try any of the local grub (pun intended) she gets along quite well with his entire family.  The Australian people she meets value her not for her skills as a warrior or a moral check on everyone else’s homicidal machiavellianism, but for her ability to educate them about the local animals and act as an emergency healer under pressure.  Jake and Rachel both admit they’d have no clue what to do with themselves without the war; Cassie clearly has an entire alternate set of skills and competencies she can fall back on once the yeerks are defeated.  Cassie doesn’t need the war, she doesn’t need her team… and she doesn’t need Jake.  

Although Jake and Cassie are still technically a couple as of this point in the series, this book makes it painfully obvious that the end is in sight.  Cassie barely spares a thought for anyone she has left at home the entire time she’s away, except for a few moments of asking herself What Would Rachel Do (always a valuable question) and speculating about whether her team has the means to find her.  The only time she really thinks about Jake is when Yami is showing her how to throw a boomerang—and the only reason she thinks about Jake at that time is because even she can’t deny that this interaction is headed toward UST-land, and she wants it to head in that direction.  Jake is a good kid, more or less, and a brilliantly well-written character, but he’s also not an easy person to love.  He’s socially awkward, terrible at expressing affection, prone to self-recrimination, and (although it’s not his fault) not much fun to be around.  Although he doesn’t get canonically diagnosed until #54, Jake is already showing signs of clinical depression by #16 and MM2.  He tends to be irritable, apathetic, manipulative, hypervigilant to the point of paranoia, absolutist in his thinking, and unforgiving of mistakes.  Again and again he refuses to show the slightest shred of vulnerability to his loved ones, making his motivations opaque and his true feelings impossible to guess.

Saying it again for the folks in the back: none of that is Jake’s fault, and none of it indicates the slightest shred of moral or emotional failing on his part.  The fact that he has depression does not in any way mean he’s not still a tough, loyal, hardworking, quick-thinking, morally decent (if kinda arrogant) person.  However, there is also not a single goddamn reason why any black woman should ever be asked to perform 100% of the emotional labor for a white man, and therefore Cassie’s decision to leave Jake because she’s not getting what she wants out of the relationship is also entirely valid.  And to be clear, Cassie is already exploring her options outside of Jake in this book.  She doesn’t cheat, even to the point of kissing or mutual flirtation, and she doesn’t explicitly consider what would happen if she started going out with Yami instead.  However, she does make note of the fact that she enjoys the afternoon she spends with this clearly-interested boy more than most of the times she’s spent with Jake lately.  She expresses a clear desire to get home, but more because she knows her friends need her than because she strongly misses anyone.  She’s just about ready to move on.  

I love Jake and Cassie’s relationship, I think it’s one of the healthier such relationships in YA fiction and definitely the healthiest relationship in the Animorphs series, and I do in fact ship those two.  I also recognize that saying Cassie’s refusal to kill Tom ended their relationship is sort of like saying that Archduke Franz Ferdinand’s death caused World War I: you can’t use a spark to set off an explosion if there’s not huge ton of gunpowder already stashed there ready to blow.  We find out after the fact that Jake spends this entire book running around frantically looking for Cassie, while Cassie spent much of this book hanging out with some other guy.  Well before the events of #50 drive them apart for good, Cassie is ready to move on.