#and (b) help joey with their Trust Everybody thing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jjmaybanksbaby · 3 years

Text

enamel pins, school dances and summer movie nights

or: alternatively, i hate everybody but you

pairing: kiara carrera x rafe cameron (platonic)

warning: cursing, underage drinking, some fighting, rafe cameron being sappy because that deserves a tw of its own

word count: 7.2k words

MASTERLIST

"I’m so glad that they’re still doing this. Keep calm. Carry on," Kiara said to the boys as she stuffed the change from their tickets back into her wallet.

It would have been an understatement to say that JJ and Pope hadn’t been eager to attend the outdoor movie night hosted by the Island Club. In fact, they'd spend thirty minutes listing all the things they would rather do when Kiara proposed the idea. She'd let them grumble about going for the better part of an hour since she knew there was no way the pogues would let her go to something on Figure Eight alone. Pogues always had each other's backs, always. Kiara figured the least she could do was pay their entry fee. Plus, she knew JJ and Pope didn't exactly have extra cash laying around for movie nights.

She would have dragged all three of the boys with her but John B hadn't been back to the chateau all day. Since the cell towers were still down thanks to the hurricane, she could only guess where he was.

"Welcome to the summer movie series. All proceeds go to...." The announcer's voice boomed over the loudspeakers as Kiara lead the boys to an empty space in the middle of the crowd.

"Back to OBX life. You know? Aren’t you guys glad that I made you come?" She really didn't have to ask, she was already sure of their answer.

"Ecstatic," Pope responded, his tone clearly lacking enthusiasm.

"My couch was pretty comfy, I’ll be honest," JJ echoed.

"We’re out of the green zone, man," Pope leaned over, commenting to JJ, out of earshot of Kiara. She didn't know about Topper's boat and Pope wasn't really interesting in bringing her in as another accessory to the crime.

"Dude, tranquilo, okay?" JJ whispered back.

"We're in the middle of Kooklandia. This is the last place I wanted to be."

"Shut up, Pope," JJ snapped, his wide eyes with warning. This was Kiara's thing, they weren't gonna let the Shakespearesque fued between Kooks and Pogues ruin her fun.

"Hey, uh…can I get two Pepsis, pleases?" Kiara asked the employee currently manning the snack bar.

"Sure," he replied.

Kiara slide the money for the sodas across the counter and took the cold drinks, watching Rafe slowly approaching from out of the corner of her eye.

"Hey, Kie," Rafe said. Kie felt her pulse spike at a nickname he'd originally given her. "Hey, what’s up? How are you?"

"I’m fine," she replied, intentionally angling her body away from him, her gaze resting anywhere but on him. For someone whose presence she uses to be able to relax in, now the sight of Rafe put her on edge.

"Good, good. Um...Tell your boy that we know what he did." Rafe held her stare and Kiara couldn't stop her lip from curling up in contempt.

"Sorry, what boy are you talking about?"

"Uh, he’ll know." Rafe smiled as if this conversation was bringing him some wicked sense of pleasure.

Rafe opened his mouth as to say something else but Kiara turned away from him. "Bye," he called to her as she walked away.

"Douche," Kiara said, loud enough that she was sure he would still hear her. She threw a glance over her shoulder, feeling Rafe's eyes still watching her.

Kiara handed Pope a Pepsi. "Just saw Rafe, and he said, and I quote, 'Tell your boy that we know what he did.' What is that?" She finished, handing JJ the second soda.

"Um...Where is he?" JJ asked back.

"Right there." Pope and JJ's heads turned around to look with her.

"Great the whole death squad," Pope said.

JJ grabbed the top of Pope's head, knocking his snapback off as he forced it forward. "Don’t stare, bro," JJ paused. "Just warning you, bro. If they corner me, I’m coming out swinging, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Pope agreed.

"Slice and dicin’. I’m on edge right now, okay? If that doesn’t work, I got this right here." JJ held up his worn backpack.

Fucking hell, Kiara thought. He brought the gun.

"Yeah, yeah. So, we just gotta stay in the group. They can’t come get us if we’re in the group," Pope remarked.

"Like a school of fish.”

"Stay in the school. Can’t leave the school. Stay in school," Pope repeated to himself.

"I’m sorry JJ…" Kiara interrupted. "Please tell me that you did not bring a gun here. JJ, there are kids."

"No Kie! I didn’t bring the gun. Everything’s fine, okay?" JJ assured, his frantic tone betraying him.

"Oh wow, thank you. That’s really convincing. I love that JJ." Kiara looked from JJ to Pope, trying to assess what kind of trouble they’d caused now. "Founding principle, you guys. No secrets amongst Pogues. What is Rafe talking about?"

Pope leaned it, bringing his face closer to Kiara's. "Kie, it might go down tonight."

"What does that mean?" Their vagueness was making Kiara extra suspicious. "'Might go down tonight.' What did y’all do?"

The boys look at each other, neither of supplying any answers to Kiara's questioning.

"Deny, deny, deny," JJ said quietly to Pope under his breath.

The opening score of The Addams Family cracked through the weathered speakers forcing an end to the conversation. A memory popped into Kiara’s head before she had time to stop it. This was Sarah Cameron’s favorite movie. Sarah used to mouth the lines along with the actors every time they watched it together.

There were a lot of glamorous parts of being best friends with the Kook-queen Sarah Cameron. When they walked down the shiny hallways of the Kook Academy literally arm-in-arm peoples' heads turned and watched them go by. All the mean girls with their once snarky remarks were suddenly complimenting Kiara's "unique style," begging her to tell them where she bought her clothes. (In truth, most of it was actaully thrifted since that was much more eco-friendly.) Plus there was the way Sarah swiped her Daddy's black card without a second thought. Kiara’s family lived on Figure Eight, they were a part of the Island Club but they would never have the kind of east coast old money the Cameron's had.

It wasn’t something Kiara usually minded. The whole money thing. Kiara never saw herself as less than because she didn’t wear a watch that cost as much as college tuition on her wrist. But it was more than that: Kiara never really saw herself as much of a Kook to begin. She didn’t want that lifestyle. She never had. It was her parents who pushed it on her. Her mom had grown up under the crystal chandeliers and ever-watchful eyes. She’d debuted into Outer Banks high society at the age of seventeen like every Kook at that age still did. An action which Kiara scoffed at. Her mom was fully prepared to be another success story of the ring-before-spring pipeline, returning to the Outer Banks after four years of college with an MRS degree and a husband who would be balding by his early forties.

But in a Hollywood-worthy meet-cute that involved one drunk sorority girl and her vodka-induced need for pancakes, Mike Carrera stumbled into Anna's life.

Mike Carrera was the opposite of Anna in every way that counted. His whole life had been hard work and grit, fighting for the things that were rightfully his and taking them when people still refused to hand them over. He had a pipe dream of owning his own restaurant, a borderline fantasy that he was dead-set on making sure came true. Anna loved him and he loved her right back. They eloped to Vegas the week after graduation even though own Anna’s mother was halfway through planning the wedding. They bought cheap rings and a second-hand dress since they were still living paycheck to paycheck. Though the bright lights of Vegas had made the impromptu wedding seem a bit more glamorous than it really was, they both knew deep down their love was the real thing. They promised each other till death do us part and meant it.

When Anna found out she was pregnant, she talked Mike into going back to the Outer Bank. Anna swore up and down the move was only so her parents could help with the baby. They'd live on the cut, work for what they deserved and be happy. Then Anna's parents bought them a house on Figure Eight as a wedding gift and Sunday dinners at the Island club became protocol. Anna slipped back into her life as a Kook and brought Mike with her. When the restaurant turned into the tourist hot spot, the zeros in their bank accounts started growing. The Carrera's got rich but their money could never compete with the trust-fond generational wealth of their fellow Kooks.

The Outer Banks only had one elementary school. All the kids on the island were thrown together at an age where no one yet realized the lines between the haves and have nots. Fifth grade was when it got messy. Every fall the class size heading to the Kildare County Middle School dropped by half when all the Kooks transferred to St. Andrews “Kook” Academy. A breeding ground for Ivy-league-bound eighteen-year-olds who lived with the cushions of their parents' bank accounts.

Kiara begged her parents not to make her go to the Kook Academy. She would have rather died than leave her best friends, Bea and Joey, who were both Pogues and staying at KDMS. She didn't realize that middle school would rip the three of them apart. By eighth grade, Kiara had her new friends. Pope Heyward, John B. and JJ Maybank, but he still went by Junior back then. Even if they were bothered by Kiara's status as half-Kook, in the same way Bea and Joey had been, they never showed it.

Mike and Anna didn't see the need to send Kiara to St. Andrews if she didn't want to go but as high school inched closed with every year, the whispers about the Kook in public school grew louder. The summer before freshman year, her parents offered her a deal - though it was hardly a fair one in Kiara's mind. She could either stay at Kildare County High School but she'd have to work in the restaurant in her free time or she could go to St. Andrews with complete freedom for a year. Kiara knew her parents wanted her to transfer so she caved and agreed to a year at St. Andrews to make them happy. Anna prayed her daughter would find her people at St. Andrews and that one year would turn into four but Kiara knew she had already found her people and was counting down the days till she could go back to them. It was only when Sarah Cameron decided the new girl might be cool that Kiara stopped marking each passing day with a big red x.

There was less than a week left in their Christmas break and Kiara was seated across from Sarah at the Cameron's dining room table bent over her practice problems for Mr. Harrings' freshman science. He infamously gave out the hardest pop quiz of the year the first day back after break and Kiara's grade couldn't take her failing it.

"What’s avocado’s number?” Sarah asked, looking up from her paper, her pen frozen in midair.

“What’s what?” said Kiara, thoroughly confused at Sarah’s question.

“You know,” Sarah paused, scanning Kiara’s face for any sign of understanding. “Avogadro’s number. Some kid in my class thought the dude’s name was avocado so we’ve been calling it avocado’s number since.”

“Ah, Avogadro’s number,” Kiara repeated, shifting her papers around until she found the one with all the formulas and constants written on it. “Six point zero two two one four zero seven six times ten to the twenty-second power.”

Sarah punched the numbers into her calculator. “Thanks, babes.”

“Of course.”

Rafe’s heavy footsteps carried through the Cameron’s massive house announcing his arrival home. He strolled into the room, a thick stack of papers in one hand and a garment bag draped over the opposite arm.

“Hey loser,” Sarah said, not inspired enough by her brother's presence to look up from her work.

“Hi Rafe,” Kiara echoed. "Where you been?"

"Being Ward's errand boy. I forgot the key to his office where I was supposed to drop off this contract so he's gonna kill me for that. But," Rafe paused digging into his pocket and pulling out a small velvet pouch. "Merry late Christmas," he finished, handing the bag to Kie. "I saw it and I thought you'd like it."

Kiara reached into the pouch pulling out a small enamel pin of the earth, shaped into a heart with the word "love" in silver written over it. Kie smoothed her thumb over the cold metal.

"You know since you're gonna save the planet and everything," Rafe added.

"Thank you. I love it!" Kiara jumped up from her chair, throwing her arms around his waist wrapping him a hug.

"No problem, Kie." Rafe said.

"Hey, I'm trying to save our planet too." Sarah pipped up.

"Shut up, Sarah," Rafe cracked. "I gave you your Christmas present last week."

Sarah stuck her tongue out at him, Rafe doing the same in return.

"What are you guys working on?" Rafe asked.

"Science," Kiara replied, reaching down to grab her backpack from underneath the table.

"Is that for Mr. Harrings' class?"

"Yeah. Yeah, it is," Kie said, half distracting by trying to decide which spot to put her new pin in.

"I think I might still have my old test from that class if you want them.”

Sarah's head snapped up at the offer. "No way."

"Sound any more surprised, Sarah. I was offering them to Kiara anyway, snob," Rafe shot back.

"I'll share," Kie assured her best friend.

Kiara followed Rafe up the grand staircase, flopping on Rafe's bed while he searched for his old work.

"Henry Spiegel was talking about taking you to a he formal in the locker room before we left for break," Rade relied from inside his closet.

"Isn't he the freshman who made varsity lacrosse?" Kiara asked back. She contemplated the idea of going to St. Andrews' Winter Formal with him. Henry was nice enough, plus he was pretty good-looking. She could stand going with him.

"I told him if I found out he'd asked you, I'd make sure he missed the next three games because of a black eye."

"Rafe."

"What? Do you really think I'm gonna let some dweeb with half a brain who only wants to get in your pants take my little sisters to formal?"

"Who am I supposed to take?” She shot back.

“I don’t know. Not him,” Rafe said, emerging, a small stack of papers in hand.

“You know Denny asked Sarah last week.”

“I know.”

Kiara paused, “You will you take?”

Rafe shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. Maybe Ashely M. Seniors don’t really go to the actual dance.”

Kie took the pages of old test for Rafe’s outstretched arm and riffled through them. His name was scribbled on the top of each one in his messy handwriting.

Her eyes drifted up to the Duke basketball poster in the corner of Rafe’s room.

“When do you hear from them?” Kie asked.

“March,” said Rafe, his voice void of emotion.

“I know you’ll get in.”

"My dad'll make sure of it.” Rafe sat down on the bed next to Kiara.

“You don’t know that.”

“I found a card addressed to Ward from the Dean of Student last week thanking him for 'the generous donation from such a valued alumni.'”

Kie's head dropped to rest on Rafe’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well he’s a dick.” Rafe’s phone buzzed and he pulled it out of his pocket, reading the text on the screen. “I gotta go. I told the boys we’d go hit at the Club tonight.”

“Thanks again for these.” Kie held up the papers. “And for the pin," she added.

“Mr. Harrings always includes the names of the scientists from the unit as bonus questions. Don’t forget to look those up,” Rafe said as he stood up from the bed. "See you around, Kie." He placed a small protective kiss on her forehead before he headed back downstairs.

"JJ?" Pope slapped JJ's shin to get his attention.

"What?" JJ whispered back over the sounds of the movie.

"I gotta take a piss.”

"Hold it."

"I can’t hold it. I drank too much soda."

"It’s too exposed. They’ll totally see us."

"I gotta go," Pope pleaded. He peered behind him to see Rafe, Topper, and Kelce still parked in the same spots at the back of the crowd. "They’re blocking the bathrooms," Pope added.

JJ looked around, thinking up a Plan B. "Alright. Come here. I know where.”

"Hey, where y’all going?" Kiara asked, turning her attention away from the movie.

"We gotta wring it out," JJ responded deadpan.

"What? You gonna hold it for each other," Kiara questioned, disgusted at the thought.

JJ shrugged off the comment and lead Pope through the crowd, the two of them ducking behind a large oak tree.

Kiara turned back to the movie playing on the giant screen, leaving the boys to their own devices. Besides, they wouldn't dare start something with all the people around. They were idiots but they knew better than that.

"Crap," Kiara cursed under her breath when Rafe trailed by Topper and Kelce brushed by her, heading in the same direction Pope and JJ had went. She watched their figures disappear behind the screen before she jumped up from her seat.

JJ's gun, the thought flew her mind.

She picked up his backpack with no intention to use it but better safe than sorry. Especially when it came to those Kooks in particular.

"Hey, kick his ass, Top!" Kiara heard Rafe yell as she rounded the corner.

Kiara felt a full-fledged panic run through her body as she took in the sight. Kelce had pinned JJ's arm behind his back and was Rafe pounded his fist into JJ’s face. A foot away, Pope was barely holding off Topper. Whatever Pope and JJ had done had obviously crossed a line.

Kiara ran in without another thought, swinging JJ's backpack in front of her. "Let go of him, Topper! Fascist asshole!" She screamed at him.

Topper grabbed the bag from her, ripping it out of Kiara's hand and throwing it aside. Kiara jumped on Topper's back, desperate to distract him.

"Hey listen, Pope," Topper yelled over the sounds of the movie. "All you gotta do is accept a little personal responsibility."

"Screw you, kook," Pope spit back.

Kiara felt arms wrap around her waist, yanking her off of Topper. The too-familiar scents of Rafe's cologne filled her nose and his breath was hot on her cheek.

She kicked her legs struggling against him, "Let go of me, Rafe."

"Stay out of this, Kiara," he warned, tossing her onto the ground. His gaze fixed on her for a second before turning away. Kiara swore she saw a look of guilt flash across Rafe's face, wordlessly apologizing for tossing her away so harshly but she didn’t have time to think about that while her boys were still in trouble.

"Kie! You okay?" Pope yelled, struggling against Topper who had wrapped his arm around Pope's neck.

"Come on, man. Just admit it," Topper shouted. "Admit you did it, bitch!"

JJ's backpack had conveniently landed close to where Kiara lay. She rolled over, pushing herself onto her knees and crawling over to the backpack. She riffled through it, her hand landing on the cold mental of the gun.

"You don't mess with me, Pogue! You hear me?" Topper continued. Kiara looked up at Topper's face which showed no signs of mercy. Meanwhile, Rafe's fist smashed into JJ's face again and again. The situation was getting worse by the second. “I'm gonna give you one chance. One chance, Pope. One chance. Come on! One!"

Kiara dropped the gun back into the backpack pulling out JJ's lighter instead, two Js craved onto the surface. She had to go big to stop Rafe, Topper and Kelce. Kiara crawled over to the edge of the sheet the movie was being projected off. Fuck, this has to work.

"Finish him off, Top!" Rafe directed.

Kie flicked on the lighter, the wind blowing out the flame the first few times. Her hands were shaking as she grabbed the edge of the sheet and held the blue flame up to it. The fire lit up her face as it took hold, spreading faster than she had expected. The crowd yelped, scrambling away as the orange flames climbed toward the sky.

"Guys! Fire!" Rafe yelled, taking in the sight.

"Get off of him!" Kie pushed Topper away from Pope who fell to the ground gasping for air. "Kelce, let go of JJ!"

"Let's get out of here," Rafe started, fleeing the scene. The other Kooks not far behind him.

"You good?" Kiara asked Pope helping him off the ground. "We're okay." She assured. Her heart was racing, her hands still shaking.

"You're a freakin' idiot," Pope responded.

"I saved your ass. Come on." Kiara threw her arm around Pope's shoulder, leading him away.

The sounds of the film continued to echo over the speakers as the sheet burned to ash behind them.

Kiara sat slumped against the wall of the St. Andrews hallway that lead into the cafeteria. The frill of her $200 dress fanned out around her. The dress, in her opinion, had been a colossal waste of money but had Sarah actually squealed when Kiara walked out of the fitting room in it. Kiara had tugged at the awkward way the skirt st on her hips but Sarah wouldn’t shut up about how perfectly the blue color fit the Winter Wonderland theme so Kiara bought it. Now, the sequins itching against her collarbone were just annoying her and Kiara couldn’t help scratching at them, making the already red marks on her skin even angrier. She was so fucked. Denny had pulled out a flash during pictures and somehow it kept ending up in Kiara's hands. The whole dance thing had Kiara incredibly anxious so she kept taking sips of the flash to keep her self busy. First during pictures, then during dinner, and in the limo on the way to the school. Now the flask was lying empty on the floor next to her and her nerves were no less settled.

She longed for her pogues so much the pain of missing them made her stomach hurt. Well, that or the alcohol. At that moment, she would have given anything to be back with them. Back with Pope and his overly nervous tendencies, back with John B. and his ideas that usually lead them into trouble, back with JJ and his flirtatious banter that left her blushing a lot more than she cared to admit. They were her family, where she belonged. Not in the gated communities of Figure Eight with mansions so big they had rooms no one entered for weeks. This whole year had been a mistake. She couldn't stand the fakeness of everybody and everything that came as a side effect to bank accounts with the kind of zeros that could seriously help if the 1% gave up being so selfish. Even Sarah's save-the-sea-turtles-with-men façade was fading away revealing another rich kid who didn’t give a shit about who she hurt.

The doors of the cafeteria swung open, the bass of the DJ's music filling the previously silent hallway. Kiara looked up to find Rafe jogging down the hall to her.

"What are you doing out here?" He asked, sliding down the way to sit next to her.

"The room kept spinning and...uh...I thought I might throw up so I went to find a bathroom," Kiara answered.

"You know the bathrooms are on the other side of the school?"

Kiara giggled which turned into a little burb which made her giggle even more.

"Jesus, Kiara. How drunk are you?" Rafe picked up the flask from the ground. He could smell the alcohol on her breath without even getting closer over. “Who's is this?"

Kiara paused for a moment, trying to remember. "Denny's."

"Sarah's date, Denny?"

Kiara nodded her head.

"Fuck," Rafe muttered. "Okay, let's get you out of here before any of the chaperons see and write you up." He stood up and held out both hands to held Kiara to her feet too.

Kiara pulled herself, leaning against Rafe for stability. The doors swung open again and Rafe's date marched into the hallway.

"Ugh, thank God. There you are. This dance is so lame. C'mon, we're all going to Joey's."

"I'm not coming. I have to take my sister home. She's totally trashed."

The girl's eyes moved over Rafe's face, landing on Kiara. "No," she corrected. "You're my date. You have to come with me."

"Did you not just hear me? I'm taking my sister home," Rafe replied.

"Are you kidding me? She's not even your real sister. She's hardly even a real Kook. I bet she's just using Sarah and you for your family's money. Just look at her dress. It's the same one every other wannabe trying-to-hard freshman has on. Pathetic."

Rafe pulled Kiara closer into him, wrapping an arm around her shoulder protectively. "You can fucking leave," Rafe spit back. "I don't wanna hear you ever talk about my family like that again."

The girl rolled her eyes. "Whatever. I was gonna hook up with Brandan tonight anyway. He's way hotter than you." She spun on her, stalking off in the same direction she had come.

Kiara looked up at Rafe, her bottom lip shaking as tears welled in her eyes. "Are you mad at me?" She asked.

Rafe laughed. "Of course not, Kie. Ashley can go fuck herself. Or she can go fuck Brandan. I don't really care." He wiped away the tear that had slide down Kiara's cheek. "Let's go find Sarah so I can take you both home."

Sarah was sitting on her date's lap back inside the cafeteria turned South Pole for the night, laughing loud enough at Denny’s shitty jokes that it was throughly annoying everyone around her.

"Get up Sarah," Rafe commanded.

Sarah surprised at Rafe's sudden presence scrambled off her date's lap. Rafe reached down and grabbed a fistful of Denny's shirt. He cocked his arm back and swung his fist straight into Denny's nose which gave a definitive crack on impact. Sarah let out a gasp and rushed forward.

"What the fuck?" She screamed at Rafe, shoving him off her date.

"You're date's an ass. Kie's completed wasted thanks to him" he said to Sarah. "Let's go. I'm taking you both home."

Sarah glanced at Kiara, who was standing slightly behind Rafe feeling both embarrassed at how much she had drank and grateful for Rafe's protectiveness.

"But I wanna go to the afterparty," Sarah protested. "She has you." Sarah's eyes locked with Kiara and Kiara's heart sank. She could tell her "best friend" wasn't about to give up the rest of her night just because she was nervous and had drunk too much.

Kiara shifted awkwardly on her feet. Sarah could have a least pretended to be conflicted, considered missing the party for a second. God, Kiara missed the unwavering faithfulness of her pogues.

Kiara tugged on Rafe's hand and he glanced over his shoulder at her. "It's fine," she slurred. She really needed out of this itchy disaster of dress as soon as possible.

"You're a really great friend," Rafe said to Sarah.

"Whatever," Sarah replied, her voice almost mimicking the way Rafe's date had said the same words. "Let's go find some ice for your nose, Denny."

They had found the gold. It was fifty feet down a well under an ax-murders house no less but they'd fucking found it. John B's crazy plan had worked and all they needed to do was get the gold out, a job which had effectively been delegated to Pope. Of course, first they had to wait for John B to get back from his fishing trip with Ward Cameron, some twisted form of pseudo father-son bonding. What was it with men and finishing? Couldn’t they pick a sport that didn’t actively destroy the environment?

Pope sat atop the kitchen counter, a pencil tucked behind his ear, his mouth moving as he made silent calculations. JJ stood in the doorway of the chateau, dripping water from the hot tub onto the floor. Kiara had thrown off the couch cushions and was rifling through the desk draws, slamming each one with frustration when they didn't hold what she was looking for. Kiara noticed this morning that a pin was missing from her backpack. It didn’t seem like a big deal but with every passing second her panic escalated.

“What are you looking for, bro? I swear this house is like one of those Where’s Waldo? books.” JJ asked Kiara.

“Did you just make a reference to a book, JJ?” Pope chimed in from across the room.

“Just because I chose not to read, doesn’t mean I can’t Pope,” JJ replied.

“Both of you are idiots. It’s a picture book anyway, you don't read it. Can you help me find my pin, please? It's the one I've always had on my backpack. The earth, shaped like a heart," Kie explained.

"Right," Pope replied, sliding off the counter where he was sitting. “Why do you care about it so much anyway?”

“It was a gift."

“From who?”

“From someone at the Kook Academy.”

“Sarah?”

“No.”

“You had other friends there?” JJ mocked.

Kie hesitated. “Fine, it was actually from Rafe as a Christmas present.”

JJ and Pope automatically stopped and looked up at each other.

“Bro, please tell me this isn’t the same Rafe who almost beat Pope’s face in last week."

“It’s not about Rafe. It’s about the pin,” Kie said.

“That’s from Rafe,” Pope finished.

“You guys weren’t there. You don’t get it. Whatever," she huffed. “Don’t help me find it then.”

“No, please Kie. Enlighten us," the sarcasm dripped off JJ's voice.

“I said you don’t have to help,” Kie repeated.

“Hey Kiara,” Pope said, grabbing her wrist. He was always the first to tell when something was off with her.

Kiara shrugged him off, wiping away her tears with her tshirt hem before the other pogues saw them.

“There was just this time,” she started, still overturning books like the pin might have been under there. “At a dance. This senior called me a fake Kook. She said my dress looked tacky like I was trying way too hard to fit but I would never fit in because I’d always be a fucking Pogue. Which of course I don’t wanna be a Kook, I was just playing dress-up for the year to please my parents and it’s like she saw straight through. Rafe was there. Like an older brother. Told her to go fuck herself. That if she ever talked about me like that again, he’d tell the whole she had an std.” Kie paused to wipe her runny nose. “He was basically my family so when Sarah dropped me like I was nothing I was sure that meant Rafe didn’t think I was worth his time anymore too. I never reached out to him again and now he just looks at me the same way he looks at every other Pogue.”

Pope cleared his throat, clearly mildly uncomfortable with Kiara’s sudden expression of emotion. It was an almost unspoken rule among the four of them that they didn’t talk about Kie’s kook year. It had sucked, bottom line. She’d shown back up the summer after ninth grade and it was the four of them again just like middle school. No one had the guts to ask about anything that had happened that year so it never got brought up.

JJ couldn't stop himself from remembering what Rafe had said at Midsummers. Tell Kiara she looks pretty hot for a Pogue. Fucking jackass. If he'd been like a brother to Kie, of course he'd know just how to hit her where it hurt.

JJ clinched his fist, wishing security hadn't pulled him away before he'd gotten a chance to swing at Rafe that night. “I still hate him,” JJ announced. “The entire Cameron family thinks they're the shit because they eat from golden spoons or something."

"The expression is born with a silver spoon in their mouth but JJ's right. All Kook’s suck," Pope added.

Rafe had wrestled off Kiara's heels after she almost face-planted in the school parking lot on the way to Rafe's truck thanks to them. He'd gotten up her all the back to the Cameron's house and in the front door successfully without her throwing up. Rafe tried to get Kiara to walk up the stairs but she'd sat down on the bottom declaring she would just sleep there so Rafe had delicately thrown her over his shoulder and didn't put her down until he dropped her on Sarah's bed.

Kiara closed her eye instantly and hummed softly, pleased with the comfortable spot she'd landed.

"No sleeping yet. You gotta drink some water first. Hold on."

Rafe dashed across the hall to his own room and grabbed the bottle of ibuprofen from his bathroom for Kiara in the morning. He also snatched the half-drunk water off his nightstand. It wasn't the best option but it was something.

"Okay, okay. Sit up," he said to Kiara, setting the water and medicine down on the bedside table.

Kiara grumbled but pushed herself upright until her back was against the headboard.

"I'm so happy you're my big bro," she said, reaching out her hand to tousle Rafe's hair. "It's always just been my mom and dad and me. And my turtle, Leo, before I lost him." Kiara felt tears wetting her cheeks again at the thought of her lost pet. "I just thought he might wanna play in the yard but then he ran off." The crying made Kiara hiccup which made her cry even more. "He ran off, Rafe. Turles aren't supposed to be fast.”

Rafe couldn't stop himself from laughing. "I didn't peg you as a sad drunk," he said, putting a hand on Kiara's shoulder to calm her down. "It's okay, Kie. I'm sure Leo is just fine."

Her sniffles stopped momentarily and she looked up at Rafe through her tear-soaked eyelashes. “You know no one ever called me Kie before you did. Now everyone does."

Rafe chuckled. "Alright, drink some water and you can sleep."

Kiara accepted the water bottle and pressed it to her lips, taking a swig. "You promise you're not mad at me? About Ashely and the dance?"

"I promise, Kie. I'd much rather make you sure you're okay."

"You're getting soft, Rafe," Kiara teased as she snuggled herself under the sheets.

"Never," he replied, reaching over and clicking off the lamp on the bedside table before he stood up. "Hollar if you think you're gonna throw up."

"Never," Kie repeated, giggling to herself as Rafe left the room, pulling the door closed behind him.

John B's face was plastered on wanted posters up and down the island. The entire county was looking for him, desperate to be the first to claim the twenty-five thousand dollar reward. The wholesome treasure hunt John B. has advertised to the Pogues at the beginning of the summer had gone way south, like equator-level south. None of them had eaten a decent meals in days, much less slept more than few hours. The whole thing was taking its toll but the stacks were too high for them to slip up now. They all knew the odds. John B's word would never stand against Ward's. They had to get him off the island.

JJ and Kiara pulled up the boatyard, the keys to the Phantom clutched so tightly in JJ's palm that they left little indentions. He'd emerged from his house, his jaw set and only held up the keys in response to Kiara asking how it went so she decided not to push him on it.

JJ shoved open the rusty metal door of the garage. "There she be. Hey, girl," he remarked. "1983 formula four-oh-two SR1." JJ pulled the sheet covering the boat off, the sunlight streaming in through the windows making the dust lingering in the air visible. "The Phantom," JJ announced proudly.

"Mmhm," Kie hummed.

"First boat to make the run to Bermuda in under sixteen hours, Kie," JJ paused. "Forty years old! Forty. And it's still the fastest thing that Kildare's ever seen."

"It's kind of a junker."

"Really?" JJ turned to her. "She's right there, Kie. She can hear you. Let's just put it this way. You would not be smokin' weed right now if she never existed, okay?"

"I just hope it runs," Kie replied.

"Oh, no, she'll run alright. She's faster than any of the cutters the boy in blue got."

The sounds of motorcycle engines roared from outside the garage.

"Pope. Finally," Kie exclaimed, jogging to meet him. Hopefully, the Outer Banks sun had burned off any weirdness still lingering from this morning, she prayed.

Rafe appeared from behind the boat and Kiara stopped suddenly, not expecting the sight of him.

"Hey, there. What's goin' on? JJ?" Rafe said and JJ also froze at the sound of the eldest Cameron's voice. "How you guys doin'?”

Barry whistled, announcing his own arrival. "Well, well...." The sounds of a gun cocking send the blood rushing to Kie's ears. JJ raised his hands in the air, backing up as Barry pushed the gun to his chest. "See, don't think I forgot about me and you on the side of the road. I'm here because I want my motheruckin' money."

Barry grabbed the side of JJ's face, shoving him to the ground. "JJ! JJ!" Kie screamed as Rafe pulled her back from the scene. "Rafe!" Kiara struggled against Rafe’s taller and stronger physique.

"That's what I'm here for, ain't it," Barry shouted lifting JJ's head up by his hair.

"It's not you we want, Kie. Alright, Where's John B?" Rafe asked.

"I don't know," she screamed back, her hand slapping Rafe's face on instinct.

"I really wish you didn't do that.”

"Look, I know what you did.” Kie’s voice wavered.

"What? What'd I do?" Rafe's face inched closer to hers.

"You murdered Peterkin."

Rafe's hand flew up to Kiara's throat, wrapping his fingers tight around it. Kiara's mouth fell open in a silent scream as she clawed at his hand. "Don't you ever say those fucking words again," Rafe warned.

"Rafe," Kiara pleaded. Eighteen months later and Kiara could tell Rafe didn’t have a single ounce of warmth left for her. The Rafe that had protected her from handsy freshman boys and made her drink water so her hangover wasn't as bad, the Rafe that had once held a deep sibling-like affection for her was gone, replaced by someone with pure blinding disdain for pogues of any kind.

"Understood? Do you understand? Where's John B? Where's John B?" Rafe asked again, his tone growing impatient

"I don't know," Kie yelled. Rafe’s hand was growing tighter around her throat with every word, forcing tears to her eyes. Fuck this. Rafe Cameron wasn’t about to be the thing that killed her. This rich, white asshole couldn’t get away with two murders.

"Where's John B? Huh?"

"I don't know! I don't know!"

Rafe's hand fell away from her throat suddenly. "Don't touch her," Kiara heard Pope screamed, his voice full of rage as he swung a metal pole into Rafe's back. The look on his face was something Kiara had never seen before from Pope. It sent a chill down her spine.

"Hey!" Barry yelled as he attempted to throw his gun to Rafe but it landed on the ground a few feet short.

"Kie! Kick it!" JJ hollered and the gun disappeared under the boat out of reach.

JJ picked up Barry slamming him into the boat. Pope's fist continued to connect with Rafe’s face. Again and again. Crap, he wasn’t stopping.

"Pope," Kie said. "Okay, Pope. Pope! Pope, that's good! Stop!"

JJ, having thrown Barry aside, moved to pull Pope off Rafe. "Hey, Pope! He's had enough, dude."

"He's good." Kie pleaded as Pope reached for a piece of plastic tubing, pulling it tight around Rafe's neck.

"Snap out of it, man. Snap out of it, dude!" JJ said.

"Pope!" Kie yelled again. "Pope, that's too much!"

"Stop, dude," JJ added. "Dude, cmon! Stop! Stop, dude!"

"Pope! Get off!" Kie desperately tried to make eye contact with him

"Let go! Come on!"

"Look at me!" Kie screamed in one final attempt to stop Pope from going to far. Rafe's face was already turning a concerning shade of red. If Pope crossed this line, Kiara feared there would be no coming back. She already had one fugitive to deal with, she didn’t want another.

Pope dropped the tubing, eyes wide with fear.

"Shit. Oh, shit." JJ said.

Rafe coughed from the floor, blood smeared down his chin.

"Okay, we gotta go. We gotta go." Kiara announced, hustling back the car. They had to get the boat ready for John B. They had to get him off the island. Her Pope-like organizational instincts kicked in protecting her from processing anything that had just happened. Letting her forget the look in Rafe’s eyes as his hand closed around her throat. Three o’clock at the dump. They had to stay on schedule. Three o’clock. Three o’clock. Three o’clock.

The single yellow heart Sarah had responded to Kiara's ‘Happy Birthday!’ text with stared back at her mockingly. She closed out of her messages, opening Instagram instead. Story after story showed the party she hadn't been invited to. A shaky video of everyone singing to Sarah, her face lit up by the glow of the candles. A bathroom selfie of all the girls who Kiara had through became her closest friends, their faces flushed red with joy. She clicked the side button of her iphone making the screen going black. Kiara couldn't stand to look at it all happening for another minute. She flopped backward on her bed opting to stare at the plain, white ceilings of her bedroom instead.

She should have been, standing by Sarah's side, smiling along with everyone in a tipsy haze of happiness, not watching it happen via Instagram. Kiara knew she wasn't doing anything productive by throwing herself a pity party but God, she was pissed. She wanted Sarah to know it too. She picked up her phone from where she'd dropped it next to her on the comforter.

The line rang twice before a voice answered the call.

“Kildare County Police, what’s the emergency?”

Kiara hesitated. Sarah was sure to figure out it was her who had ratted on the party and that would be social suicide enough. But Sarah really had brought this on herself. She should have invited to Kie to her fucking birthday.

“Hello? Anyone there?” The operator asked.

Kiara brought the phone back up to her ear. “Hi, I’d like to file a noise complaint, please. Two six six St. Margaret Street.”

“Yes, the Cameron’s house,” Kiara confirmed, wiping at her tear-stained cheeks and steading her voice as she relied the rest of the information to the operator.

Happy birthday to you, Sarah Cameron.

taglist! @surferkie

#outer banks #obx #kiara carrera #rafe cameron #outer banks fanfiction #kiara carrera x rafe cameron #obx netflix #obx fanfic #outer banks fic #kiara carrera outer banks #rafe cameron outer banks

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obwjam · 3 years

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Giant Mike and Tiny Phoebe!!!! Also yes I feel like tiny Phoebe would treat things like an adventure, her size does not stop her from doing the things she wants to do for the most part! To be honest that sounds so fun and like such an exciting character who sees the quirky fun in her life, most times hardly with any filter.

Actually that makes me question what things would make her stop or a moment where Monica, Joey, or Rachel would have to put their foot down and say something serious to stop their friend from getting hurt. Maybe angst? Chandler for the most part aside from this scenario would probably abide by most borrower laws when he's not around the gang, so I feel like he would be able to talk to her but at a certain point I feel like she'd be dealing with a angst arc. What do you think?

oooooohhhhhhh okay i feel like phoebe would only stop if a) she was discovered by a human who pretended to be her friend or was just really demeaning and phoebe didnt really notice, and the human puts her in a cage as a pet and she has to escape or the human gang would have to find her; or b) she gets seriously hurt and has to rely on her human friends to care for her around the clock and it frustrates her deeply. in scenario A i think she would pretend not to be spooked but she would be REALLY angry and upset, and she would def learn a lesson on being too open and too trusting. she would have to come to terms with not everybody being like her friends and no matter how much of a free spirit she is, she can’t do everything she wants and sometimes she needs help and permission. in scenario B i think she would try and be self-sufficient anyway but she literally cant move. and monica keeps essentially yelling at her to just stay put and they get into an argument that ends in phoebe admitting that she cannot stand the idea of being looked down upon and she doesn’t want everyone to see her as helpless. and as much as everyone tries to console her and reassure her, she just feels really weak and really exposed and just asks for everyone to go away so she can think over things by herself. she doesnt even wanna hear from chandler. and it lowkey creates tension for a while bc they forcibly try not to act demeaning, which becomes obvious and annoying, and now they’re being weird around chandler too which freaks him out

#IN THIS ESSAY I WILL #damn i did not expect to write this much #but i guess we’re just rewriting the entire series now lmao #asks #friends

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mistrose23 · 5 years

Text

Make me - B. Hardy

Summary: The reader and Ben are at a BoRhap party, when things are getting heated. Ben takes the reader upstairs to teach her a lesson

WARNINGS: Smut, jealousy, language, dom/sub, rough sex, orgasm denial, choking, etc. 18+ ONLY

WORD COUNT: 8773

They were at a Bohemian Rhapsody cast party at Roger Taylor’s house. Rami was with Lucy, Gwilym with his fiancée, Joe was alone, and Ben was with his girlfriend Y/N. Ben and Y/N have been together for four years and they were living together for two years. Y/N was wearing a very skin-tight red top with a tight black leather skirt. She picked red and leather, because Ben loves the colour red on her and whenever she wore leather, it drove him insane. On top of that, her lips were painted red, just like her nails. What he didn’t know was that she wasn’t wearing any underwear underneath it. If he knew that she wasn’t wearing anything underneath her dress, she would be punished. Normally Ben was the dominant one in the bedroom and Y/N loved to be a sub. Roleplaying was also a thing they did regularly. BDSM too was a thing that occurred from time to time.

Right now, Ben his hand was placed firmly on Y/N’s waist and every now and then, his hand slipped to her ass. Rami and Lucy were nowhere to be found, they were probably fucking in one off the bedrooms in the house. Gwilym and his fiancée were seated in the living room and they were talking to Brian May and his wife Anita. Roger was talking to Ben and Y/N and Joe decided to tag alone.

‘So, Y/N, fancy another drink?’ Roger asked when he saw that her glass was empty.

‘Oh, please, sir,’ Y/N replied politely.

Roger smirked. ‘No need to call me sir, sweetheart.’

Ben his grip tightened around his waist. ‘I can also get it for you, love.’

He pulled her closer to his body and pressed a kiss behind her ear. Y/N started to realize that her man was getting a little bit jealous. Wouldn’t it be nice if she would mess with his head a little bit more? Before Ben could make any attempt to get new drinks, Roger already walked away. Ben pressed his lips together in a firm line and he watched Roger. In the mean time, Joe started to talk to Y/N. While they were talking, she noticed that Joe was already a bit tipsy. He was standing really close to Y/N and he was a bit stumbling. Thank God that Ben did not see this, because when he did, he would be so jealous. Roger returned and Y/N smiled, because he came back with two bottles of liquor and a couple of shot glasses. He stood still next to Y/N and he winked at her.

‘Tequila shots for the lads,’ Roger grinned. ‘Vodka for the lady.’

‘Thank you, Roger,’ Y/N winked back, and she touched his bicep.

‘Ben, you should to a belly button shot on Y/N,’ Joe giggled.

First, he looked at Y/N with a clenched jaw, of course he had seen the winks between her and Roger. But then he looked at her unsure. ‘Love, are you okay with that?’

Roger patted him on shoulder. ‘You really should, mate. Believe me when I say that it is amazing.’

‘You can do it, Ben,’ Y/N said.

She took Roger’s hand, placed herself on the kitchen counter and she pulled up her shirt, just underneath her boobs. With her legs, she pulled Ben to the edge of the counter and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Then, she leant with her elbows on the counter, so that she could look at his face.

‘Pour the tequila over me, Rog,’ Y/N said with a wink.

Roger did what she asked, and he poured the tequila in her belly button. The cold liquor startled her, and she felt goose bumps rise on her skin. But something else happened too, something that she didn’t notice.

‘Ben, mate, I don’t think your girl is wearing a bra tonight,’ Joe said, and he licked his lips.

Y/N blushed, and Ben hit Joe against his chest. His jaw was clenched. ‘Mate, you cannot say that.’

‘Ben, just drink the tequila,’ Y/N ordered him. ‘Otherwise I will let Roger or Joe do it.’

Something changed in his eyes and his head moved to her body immediately. Without hesitation, he slurped the liquid out of her bellybutton. Y/N shivered and out of reflex, she grabbed his hair. Her back also arched and maybe a soft moan left her mouth. She felt Ben smile and he made a trail of kisses to the waistband of her pants.

‘Ben!’ she huffed, and she pushed his head away.

Ben looked at her with a smirk and he wiped his mouth clean with the back of his hand. ‘I think Y/N needs a drink.’

Roger and Joe were looking at the two with an open mouth. They knew that Ben and Y/N were really open about their relationship, but they hadn’t seen this before. Roger had to admit, that looked hot.

‘Yeah, of course,’ Joe replied, and he took the vodka bottle.

Y/N pulled her shirt down and slowly she slid off the kitchen counter. ‘Joey, can you give me my glass?’

‘I have a better idea, open up, babe,’ Joe said a with a wink.

Y/N laughed, winked back and obeyed. Joe poured the vodka in her mouth. He was a little bit too enthusiastic, because some of the liquor dripped out of her mouth. Or, to be more precise, the liquor dripped from her chin, to her neck and throat and then down into her shirt.

‘Oh, let me help you with that,’ Joe said and out of nowhere, he licked the vodka away from her neck.

Y/N blushed, and she locked eyes with Ben. He was seeing red and his fist were clenched. Roger was looking at the three full confusion, but he also smiled. It reminded him of his past.

Y/N patted Joe on his chest. ‘Oh, you naughty boy.’

She was still watching Ben and at this moment, he was fuming. Roger saw this and he grabbed Joe by his neck.

‘It’s time to leave these two alone,’ Roger said to Joe and he dragged him away.

Ben grabbed her wrist and he dragged her further into the kitchen. He slammed her body against a cupboard.

‘What were you doing, love?’ Ben whispered in her ear and he kissed her earlobe.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about, Ben?’ Y/N said, and she tried not to moan.

Ben chuckled darkly and he looked at her intensely. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about, Ben.’

Y/N rolled her eyes at him. ‘Don’t mock me.’

Ben placed his hands flat against the cupboard. He gazed at her and she felt extremely trapped and naked. ‘Don’t tell me what to do. And don’t roll your eyes at me. You know what I like to with disrespectful girls.’

Y/N gulped. ‘I’m sorry, sir. I won’t do it again.’

‘So, will you just tell me what happened between you and my best mate?’ Ben asked again.

‘Nothing,’ Y/N answered. ‘I just wanted to tease you a little bit. You’re looking really good in that blouse.’

Ben smirked. ‘Really?’

Y/N didn’t trust the way he looked at her. ‘Yes. Especially now that you unbuttoned it a little bit. It gives me a perfect view on your chest.’

‘Oh love,’ Ben smirked. ‘I love how you think that you can talk your way out of this. Well, I got bad news for you. In a minute I will take you upstairs with me and I will fuck you. I’m going to show Joe and Roger and in fact, I’m going to show everybody here that you belong to me. They will hear you scream my name. They will hear you beg for me. They will fucking hear you cum. And they will know that I fucked you that good. Do you understand?’

Y/N released a breath that she didn’t know that she was holding in. He was so jealous. All because she was talking to Roger this night and because Joe showed interest in her. She loved it. Normally, she is a total sub for him, but now she was going to make him work for it. Ben loved a challenge.

‘Yes, sir,’ Y/N complied. ‘Take me upstairs.’

‘Very well, princess,’ Ben smiled, and he kissed her jawline. He even nibbled at it. ‘Let’s go.’

He released her wrists and he took one of her hands in his. Joe sat next to Gwilym on the couch and they were talking and drinking with Brian and Roger. Lucy and Rami were still missing and Gwilym’s fiancée was gossiping with Anita. When Ben and Y/N walked past the lads, Joe shot Y/N a glance.

‘Rog, we are heading upstairs for a bit,’ Ben announced loudly to the lads.

‘What are you going to do, mate?’ Joe asked curiously. His eyes were blown, and his cheeks were red from the alcohol.

Gwilym and Brian shot him a glare, because obviously everyone in the room could imagine what Ben wanted to do to his insanely hot girlfriend.

‘Nothing that concerns you, mate,’ Ben said with a devilish smirk.

Roger grinned and he gave Ben a thumbs up.

But Joe couldn’t drop it and he giggled. ‘Oh, I know. You’re going to punish Y/N for the little teasing we did in the kitchen.’

Ben blushed a bit, but he shook it off. ‘Let’s go, Y/N.’

‘Wait,’ Y/N said.

She grabbed Ben his shoulder, so that her lips touched his ear. ‘Maybe Joe should tag along. I bet he can make me cum within seconds. His fingers are so long, and you must have seen his cock once. I bet he is big. Just look at the jeans he is wearing now. Fuck, Ben.’

Ben released her hand and he looked at her furiously. ‘What did you just say?’

Y/N smirked, and she placed her hand on his chest. ‘You heard me. Should I ask him?’

She made a move to turn around but within a second, her back was pushed against the wall. His right hand was wrapped around her throat and he applied a little bit of pressure. Y/N gasped, she loved this side of Ben. She loved it when he was angry or jealous. His eyes were dark and glued on hers, and his jaw was clenched again.

‘Take it back,’ he ordered her. ‘Apologise to me.’

Only now she noticed that the room fell silent. She bet that everyone was trying to look at them, but Ben his broad back was blocking their vision. Tears were forming in her eyes. He was humiliating her in front of his friends, something he loved to do.

‘Make me,’ Y/N dared him.

‘Excuse me?’ he replied, and his nose touched hers.

‘I said,’ Y/N said, and she bit his underlip softly. ‘Make. Me.’

Ben growled. ‘Maybe my big cock in your filthy mouth will help. What do you say?’

Y/N gasped, and she felt her pussy getting wet. Ben released her throat and instead he grabbed her wrist. With force, he dragged her out of the living room and upstairs. He almost ripped the door off the hinges, and he pushed Y/N inside. She couldn’t do anything else but stare at the man in front of her. God, he looked so good when he was angry and jealous. He faced her and he made eye contact with her.

‘Lay on the bed,’ he ordered her. ‘You are not allowed to do anything. Do not touch yourself, do not undress yourself, do not look away. You can only look at me.’

Y/N knew it was for the best to just listen to him. So, she nodded and went to the bed. She laid down and eyed him. Ben eyed her as well and he unbuttoned his blouse aggressively. When the buttons didn’t want to unbutton, Ben growled and ripped his blouse off. Y/N breathed heavily, and she felt herself getting extremely wet. His shoes and pants came off after. He stomped towards the bed and he grabbed Y/N’s chin forcefully.

‘Listen here, princess,’ he growled. ‘I do not tolerate that stunt you pulled downstairs. You are mine and I am yours. Only I am allowed to fuck you. Not Joe. And you cannot flirt with Roger. You are for my eyes only, princess. As a punishment, I will spank you for being disrespectful. And after the spanking, I expect an apology from you. Do you fucking understand?’

Y/N trembled, and she nodded quickly. He was so hot right now and he knew it. He knew that he had this effect on her. ‘Yes, sir.’

‘Good,’ he said, and he sat down on the bed as well. ‘Don’t touch yourself. Don’t touch me. And count with me.’

He roughly lifted her ass up in the air and he pushed her head down. Without a warning, he spanked her ass hard. Y/N let out a huff, but she enjoyed it. He spanked her ten times, five times for Joe and five times for Roger. Ben switched between the ass cheeks and each spanking was rougher. When he finished, he rubbed her ass softly and he slid his hands around her waist. His pointer fingers were so close to her pussy.

‘I am so sorry for being disrespectful, sir,’ Y/N whined. Ben’s fingers moved slowly to her pussy and unwillingly, she started to moan and whine even more. ‘I shouldn’t have let Joe lick my neck clean. You are the only one who is allowed to touch me intimately.’

Ben moved the skirt up and he groaned. She was not wearing panties. It was like she wanted him to punish her. He unzipped the skirt and he slowly pulled it off of her.

‘You are not wearing panties,’ he stated. ‘And as Joe said, you are also not wearing a bra. He and Roger saw your beautiful nipples through the tight shirt that you’re wearing. Were you looking for trouble tonight, princess? You better don’t lie to me.’

‘I did it, because I love it when you get rough with me,’ Y/N confessed.

She was not allowed to touch herself and touch Ben, but she really needed his hands a little bit lower. He was almost touching her core.

‘Will you please touch me, Ben?’ she begged. ‘I’m aching for you. I need your touch.’

‘Oh, princess,’ Ben grinned, and he spanked her ass one more time. Y/N moaned again, and she felt a bit of her wetness dripping on her thigh. ‘You are so desperate.’

‘Ben, please,’ she whined.

His hands were so close, but he wasn’t doing anything, and Y/N couldn’t handle it.

‘Were do you want me to touch you, huh?’ Ben asked her softly.

‘My pussy,’ she cried. ‘Please.’

He pressed a kiss behind her ear, and he moved his left hand between her legs. Y/N gasped, and she had to control herself so badly, because she really wanted to press her body against his. With a very slow pace, Ben’s fingertips finally touched her pussy lips. Y/N moaned instantly, and she let her head rest against Ben’s chest.

‘Oh my, you are so wet, princess,’ Ben groaned, and he slipped his fingers further into her pussy. ‘Did I make you this wet? Is all this for me?’

Y/N nodded. ‘Yes, yes, Ben! You did this to me. You made me this wet. Only you.’

‘Good,’ he said, his voice sounded husky. ‘How does it feel, princess?’

‘So fucking good,’ Y/N panted. ‘Can you scissor me, sir?’

‘Of course, princess,’ Ben said, and he pressed a kiss against her temple.

His right hand found her breast and he started to squeeze it. His thumb and his pointer finger were rubbing her nipple and with his left hand, he inserted two fingers inside her. First he let her get used to it but seeing and hearing that she was a moaning mess, he knew that she could handle it. Slowly he started to spread his fingers, so that he was scissoring her. Y/N cried, and her hands were gripping the blankets underneath her, remembering that she wasn’t allowed to touch Ben.

‘Is this what you wanted?’ he asked her.

‘Y-yes,’ Y/N breathed. ‘Please, Ben.’

He chuckled and withdrew his hand. ‘No. You don’t deserve it, you naughty girl.’

‘B-Ben,’ Y/N whined, and she turned around to face him. ‘No, please. I need you.’

He licked his fingers clean, while maintaining eye contact with Y/N. ‘No, princess. You have been a bad girl. I do not listen to bad girls.’

The only thing that Y/N could do, was watch him. His long pointer finger disappeared in his mouth and Y/N moved closer to Ben. She wanted to touch him. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted him inside of her. And she would make sure that that would happen tonight.

‘Sir, may I take off my shirt?’ Y/N asked.

‘Yes, princess,’ Ben said, and he watched her. ‘From now on, you may touch me again.’

Y/N pulled the shirt over her head and her breasts were free. She was completely naked now and Ben loved it. He immediately latched his mouth on one of her breasts and he started to lick it and kiss it and suck it. Y/N’s hands grabbed Ben’s hair and she tugged his hair, which resulted in a groan from Ben. She kissed his neck and she sucked a hickey. Ben released himself from her breast and he attacked her mouth. His tongue slipped in her mouth and he kissed her furiously. He came onto her with so much force, that Y/N fell backwards with Ben on top of her and he was straddling her. They made out for a while and Y/N felt Ben’s dick getting hard. Perfect.

‘Ben,’ she whispered. ‘Fuck me, please.’

‘Not yet. I want you to ride my thigh first,’ Ben whispered in her ear and he took her earlobe in his mouth. He licked it and kissed it and Y/N moaned. ‘And I want you to dry hump me. I want you to make me cum with just your movements. You can do that for me, right princess?’

‘Yes, sir,’ Y/N nodded.

Ben took a different position, so that he was comfortably sitting and so that Y/N could sit on top of him. She wrapped her hands around his neck for a steady grip. Ben was only in his boxers and that meant that she could rub her pussy over his muscled thighs without any obstacles, like his pants or her panties. The blond man in front of her laid his big hands on her hips and he steadied her.

‘One more thing, princess,’ Ben said with a smirk and Y/N hummed. ‘You are not allowed to cum. Because disrespectful girls don’t cum. They have to earn it first. And after you let Joe touch you like he was me and after you let Roger flirt with you like he was me... I don’t know if you can prove yourself to me.’

‘Ben, no!’ Y/N whined. ‘I can be a good girl. I will prove it you.’

‘No arguing, princess,’ Ben said sternly. ‘Now, be a good girl and make me cum.’

She complied without arguing and she started to rub her pussy against his leg. His thighs were the best and Ben knew it. They were very muscular, so she could stimulate the nerves in her pussy with ease. She was panting already, and Ben’s rock-hard cock wasn’t helping either. It poked her bare pussy through his boxers and god, what a feeling. The tense muscles caused for extra friction and both felt the wetness drip on Ben his thigh. She continued to move back and forth on his leg.

‘Are you dripping already, princess?’ Ben mumbled and he started to kiss her.

The kiss was passionate. Y/N moaned in Ben’s mouth and she breathed rapidly. Her movements were getting rougher, but also longer. This was a sign for Ben that she was close. His leg was wet from her dripping core and he smirked during the kiss. He scratched her back with his nails and Y/N hissed.

‘Fuck, Ben, I’m so close,’ Y/N whimpered. ‘Can I please cum? I will give you such a good time.’

Ben chuckled and he kissed her neck. ‘No, princess. First, you have to make me cum. Then we can talk about you cumming tonight. I’m still not sure if you are allowed to cum at all.’

‘Ben, please,’ Y/N pleaded, and she frantically rubbed her pussy on Ben’s thigh. She pressed her forehead against his and she made eye contact with him. ‘Sir, I beg you. I would do anything for you.’

‘Not good enough, princess,’ Ben said with a fake pout. ‘Why don’t you start dry humping me, huh? I bet that will make me cum. Just looking at your tits bounce up and down will do the trick. Or just the feeling of your leaking core on my boxers. Maybe if I’m in a good mood, you can lick my cock clean. What do you say, princess?’

Y/N was trembling, and her mouth started to water. Was he serious? She couldn’t ask for more in this moment.

‘Please, please, please, sir,’ Y/N whispered.

‘Go on then,’ he encouraged her. He picked her up lightly and he moved her from his thigh to his lap. ‘My cock isn’t getting any harder.’

Y/N inhaled deeply, and she started to ride him. Ben immediately grunted and he moved his hands to her hips. He slowly helped her set a pace. His boxers were not comfortable anymore, but he wanted her to dry hump him. She kept on grounding her hips into his, while she released his shoulders. He watched her in anticipation, not knowing what she was doing. She slid the hair tie from her wrist, and she put her hair in a high ponytail. Ben’s eyes became dark, his jaw clenched, and he growled. She knew that this affected him every time they had sex.

‘Fuck, princess,’ Ben said, and he panted. ‘Keep going.’

Y/N did what the told her and she kept riding him. Her fingers were intertwined in his hair again and every now and then she pulled on his hair. That made him moan and gasp and Y/N enjoyed it. She continued to do it a little bit rougher so that her boobs were bouncing. Ben’s eyes went to her chest immediately and he gulped. Her tits were so close to his face and it made his mouth water. His dick poked Y/N’s entrance and she wished that he would cum soon, because then he would remove his boxers. That’s why she worked even harder on making him cum. Her lips were attached to his neck, were she kissed and sucked his skin. Ben was trembling underneath her. He grabbed her tighter and he moved his hips upwards, to guide her. As soon as Y/N dragged her pussy over his cock very slowly, Ben couldn’t control himself anymore. He came in his boxers and he exhaled rapidly and loudly. Y/N helped him come down from his high. He was breathing loudly, and his head rested against Y/N’s chest. Then, he softly pushed Y/N off of him. Ben undid himself from his boxers and Y/N looked at his length with big eyes. She couldn’t wait for the moment that her mouth was filled with his dick.

Ben grabbed her chin and he looked her in her eyes. ‘Lick me clean. And after that, I want you to wrap those red sinful lips around my cock. I want you to suck me like your life depends on it. If you make me cum again, I will think about letting you cum tonight.’

‘Thank you, sir,’ Y/N whimpered politely.

Ben laid back and he placed one of his hands behind his head. The other one made his way to the back of Y/N’s head and he grabbed her hair. Y/N lowered herself so that she could begin with the cleaning. She licked a long stripe from his inner thigh to his V-line. Ben hissed and he pulled at her hair. Y/N moaned, and the vibration caused an incredible sensation for Ben. After Y/N cleaned his inner thighs and the delicate skin around his dick, she swallowed all the remaining cum that she had in her mouth. While swallowing, she held eye contact with Ben. Ben groaned and he had to keep looking at her. Just seeing her swallow his cum and keeping the eye contact made his dick hard again. The blonde man saw a bit of his cum slip from the left corner of Y/N’s lips. Ben lifted his hand and he swept it away with his thumb. Then, he held out this thumb for her, waiting for Y/N to suck it off. She took his wrist in her hands and she brought his thumb to her mouth. Slowly she licked the cum off it and after that, she took his thumb in her mouth to suck it. Ben moaned again and his other hand moved to his dick and he began to stroke himself.

Y/N pulled back and she put her hand over his. ‘Please, let me.’

Ben watched her and nodded. He withdrew his hand and he allowed Y/N to touch his length. She started to pump it slowly, but that was enough for Ben. While Y/N was giving him an amazing hand job, Ben started to kiss her throat and neck. He left hickeys behind and he even bit her, carefully.

Y/N hissed and interrupted the hand job she was giving him. ‘Ben, did you bite me?’

Falling out of his role immediately, he looked at her shocked. ‘Yes, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?’

The woman smiled and she stroke his cheek. ‘Don’t worry, I liked it. You can do that more often if you want.’

Ben smiled and within a snap, he was back in character. He took her hand and watched her. ‘You better continue what you were doing, otherwise you will definitely not cum tonight.’

Y/N gulped, and she grabbed his cock again. She started to pump his length and she made sure to massage his balls with her other hand. Her thumb grazed the tip and Ben moaned. God, she was so good at this. The pumping was done in a tardy pace and Ben couldn’t handle it any longer. He needed more action, he wanted more friction. His cock was so hard, and he needed release, he didn’t care about the overstimulation.

‘Princess, suck my cock,’ he grunted. ‘Now.’

Without saying a word, Y/N lowered her head and she kissed the tip of his dick. Ben hissed and started complimenting his girl. She withdrew her hands, so that she could place them on his thighs. Y/N scratched him a little bit with her nails and she licked the thick vein on his length. Unwillingly, he arched his back a bit and because of that, his cock nudged against Y/N’s mouth. His cock was red throbbing, Ben was so fucking horny. Y/N wrapped her lips around his dick, and she began to lick it. Sometimes she pressed little kisses and other times she sucked. The results were the same, Ben whimpering above her. His hands were found in her hair, he had made a makeshift ponytail and he tugged on it harshly. That made Y/N moan and that send shivers down Ben’s spine. At one point, Y/N had taken all of what she could fit of his length in her mouth and from that moment Ben decided that he wanted to mouth fuck her. He bucked his hips and that caused tears in Y/N’s eyes and a gagging sound.

‘Come on, princess,’ Ben growled. ‘I know you can handle it. Would you like me to fuck you mouth?’

Y/N whimpered and nodded.

But Ben wasn’t pleased with that answer. ‘Words, princess. Use your words.’

Y/N released his dick from her mouth. A string of her spit dangled from her lips and she watched Ben. ‘Please, sir. Fuck my mouth.’

He grinned. ‘Of course, princess.’

Ben got up from the bed, one hand wrapped around his length so that he could stroke himself. With his other hand, he motioned Y/N to get off the bed as well. She did that right away and she stood in front of her man.

Ben his eyes bore into hers. ‘On your knees. Put your hands on my thighs and don’t even think about touching yourself.’

‘Yes, sir,’ Y/N whispered.

But before she sunk down to her knees, she closed the gap between both of them to kiss him. Ben was taken aback, but he kissed her back. He was dominate in everything. His tongue, his hands, his lips... he was dominate. Y/N bit his underlip and Ben moaned softly. The grip he had on her hips tightened, but then he pushed her off of him roughly. Y/N didn’t expect this and that’s why she stumbled and fell backwards.

‘On. Your. Knees. Princess,’ Ben growled ruthless.

Y/N whined, and she did what he asked.

Forcefully, he grabbed her chin. ‘Did I say that you could kiss me?’

She didn’t dare to talk, and she didn’t dare looking at him.

‘You better answer my question,’ he warned her. ‘And you better look at me when you speak to me.’

Y/N blinked and eyed him. ‘No, you didn’t.’

‘Then why did you?’ he asked.

‘B-because I love kissing you,’ she muttered. ‘You make me feel so good.’

Ben chuckled. ‘Then you should have asked. You know that I have to punish you now.’

Y/N pouted, and she looked at him apologetic. ‘Please, sir, no punishment. I will behave from now on.’

He chuckled again and something in his eyes changed. ‘You said that before, I don’t know if I can take you on your word anymore, you little brat.’

A whine left her mouth. ‘No, sir, please. You have to believe me.’

‘Ah, ah, ah,’ he stopped her. ‘I’m tired of your apologies. Shut up.’

‘Make me,’ Y/N said, and she raised her eyebrows. She didn’t know where this confidence came from, but she liked it. She liked it to go against Ben sometimes and she knew that he would appreciate it, afterwards.

First he stared at her. Did she really just say that to him? Then, he laughed, and he shook his head. But what happened next, startled Y/N. His eyes turned dark and with the hand that still held her chin, he forced her mouth open. Tears sprung in Y/N her eyes, but she didn’t make any sound. She was curious what he was going to do. Without any warning or what so ever, he shoved his length into her mouth and immediately he started to thrust it in and out her mouth.

Being surprised, Y/N gagged during the first couple of thrusts.

‘You fucking brat,’ Ben spat at her. ‘Who do you think you are, huh? Calling Roger “sir”, letting Joe lick liquor from you neck, flirting with my best friend and you even suggested that he could join us. You. Are. Mine.’

Tears fell down on her cheeks and she tried to nod, she tried to agree with him. Yes, she were his. Ben’s mouth hung open and he moaned loudly. Her warm mouth felt incredible around his cock and seeing her crimson red lips wrapped around his length made him almost cum. His hands held her makeshift ponytail and he yanked at it with every thrust. It made Y/N moan again and the vibration caused Ben’s pleasure. Y/N tried to relax her throat so that Ben could pound deeper into her. When that succeeded, Ben smiled.

‘You’re doing so well, princess,’ Ben said. He released her hair with one hand, and he wiped her tears from her cheek. ‘Allowing me to deepthroat you, you don’t know much you please me. Do you feel me hitting the back of your throat, princess?’

The girl nodded again, and Ben grinned. Her nails were digging into his thighs, but Ben did not care. With every thrust, Y/N’s nose hit his pubes and she groaned.

‘You mouth fits so well around my cock,’ Ben grunted. ‘Pretty red lips wrapped around me. You can feel how close I am, don’t you? You can taste my pre-cum, can’t you?’

Y/N whimpered, because he was right. His cock was so hard in her mouth and it was pulsing furiously. Pre-cum was dripping on her tongue and she swallowed it like a good girl.

‘I’m so close,’ Ben huffed. ‘Do you want me to coat your throat with my cum? Do you want to swallow every last drop of my cum, princess?’

The girl was whining and nodding, and Ben tugged at her hair, what caused more whining. His thrusts were rough, but they were getting sloppy.

‘Such a good girl,’ Ben said, and he hissed, feeling his orgasm coming. ‘No, I need to be inside of you when I cum. Let go off me.’

Doing as what she was told, Y/N opened her mouth so that Ben could pull out. He released Y/N her hair and right after, he took his dick in his hand.

‘Stand up,’ Ben ordered, and he watched her closely.

Y/N listened, and she stood up. Ben walked towards her and he started to circle around her. She felt like was she was being inspected.

‘Hands behind your back,’ Ben whispered, when he stood still behind her. ‘Don’t touch yourself and don’t touch me.’

The girl whimpered and nodded, while putting her hands behind her back. The blond man rested his hands on her shoulders and just his touch made her shiver. Ben kissed the skin behind her ear, and he made a trail to her earlobe. He put her earlobe in his mouth, and he sucked on it.

Y/N gasped. ‘M-may I speak again, sir?’ She was afraid to be punished again.

He released her earlobe and he kissed her shoulder blades. ‘That depends. Are you going to be a brat?’

‘No, sir,’ Y/N promised, and she felt him smile against her skin.

‘Then you are allowed to speak again,’ he said.

‘May I rest my head against your chest?’ she continued to ask.

Ben chuckled and he stopped kissing her. ‘Now you are asking too much, princess. I just told you that you cannot touch me.’

‘I’m sorry, sir,’ Y/N said with a pout.

Ben walked again and he stopped in front of her. Y/N watched him cautiously, but there was nothing to fear. Ben cupped her cheeks and he kissed her on the lips. His tongue licked her bottom lip, a sign for her to open her mouth. She obeyed him and she let him passionately kiss her. Both moaned into the kiss and she couldn’t help but bit his underlip softly. Ben smiled in the kiss and one of his hands wandered down to her tits. With his thumb and his pointer finger, he pinched her nipple and he rubbed it slowly. Y/N moaned loudly in Ben’s mouth and that made him smirk. He pulled back from the kiss and he began to kiss her throat. When he started to suck hickeys on her delicate skin, she had to contain herself badly. She wanted to touch him more than anything. She wanted to tug on his hair, rest her head against his shoulder or chest, cup that beautiful face of his or she just wanted to hold his cock in her hands.

‘Ben,’ she muttered. ‘Sir, you make me feel so good.’

‘Oh yeah?’ he asked her.

Then, his hand trailed from her breast to her core and Y/N inhaled sharply. The hand that was still rested on her cheek, was moved to her throat.

‘I’m going to make you feel even better,’ he promised her.

He pushed one finger inside of her, while his thumb rubbed her clit. Y/N her eyes widened, and she began to pant.

‘Haven’t touched you in a while, but you’re still wet for me,’ Ben said. ‘Good girl.’

She still held her hands behind her back, but it was getting hard. The need to touch Ben grew stronger every second. Ben quickly pumped his finger in and out of her core and his thumb drew circles on her clit. Y/N was a moaning mess.

‘Sir, you are amazing,’ Y/N cried. ‘Can I please, please, please touch you?’

‘You are so desperate for me, princess,’ Ben enjoyed this way too much. He knew he had the upper hand, he always had the upper hand. ‘Maybe you may touch me if you continue begging. You are very pretty when you beg.’

‘Please, sir,’ Y/N whined. ‘I would do anything for you. I would let you fuck me in front of the others. I would milk your cock so many times tonight until you can’t cum anymore. I would let you humiliate me, punish me, but please. Please, sir, let me touch you.’

Ben nibbled her jawline and he bit her softly. ‘All right. You can touch me, but not with your hands, they stay behind your back. No complaints, take it or leave it.’

‘Thank you, sir,’ Y/N said relieved.

She wasn’t completely satisfied, but this was better than nothing and she knew better than to go against Ben right now. Y/N let her head rest against his muscled chest, and she inhaled his scent. She gasped when Ben inserted a second finger and he slowed down his pace.

‘I have to prepare you for my cock,’ Ben whispered in her ear and he kissed her there. ‘I’m going to destroy your pussy.’

Y/N’s eye widened and she was getting wetter, if that was even possible. But seeing Ben his face, she knew it was possible, because he was smirking. Fuck that pretty face of his. She pushed her lips on his and she started making out with him. Ben growled, but he continued pounding his fingers into her.

He pulled back for a second to watch her with such passion. ‘Touch me, princess. Use your hands.’

Y/N smiled. One hand took his cock and the other was tangled in his hair. Her lips were pressing kissing against his throat, while she tugged his hair and pumped his dick.

‘I’m close, sir,’ Y/N whispered in his ear. ‘Please, I’m fucking close.’

‘Oh, we can’t have that,’ Ben told you with a devilish smirk and he withdrew his hand.

Being shocked, Y/N released his length and she looked at him questionably. ‘W-what?’

‘Have you earned the right to cum, princess?’ he asked rhetorically, and he took a step forward, causing Y/N to do a step backwards. ‘No, no yet. Did you thought that I forgot that you kissed me without permission? Oh, sweetheart.’

Y/N pouted. ‘B-but -’

Ben raised his eyebrows and he took another step forwards and Y/N stepped backwards. ‘Are you talking back to me?’

‘No, s-sir,’ Y/N stuttered. ‘But I thought -’

‘You thought?’ Ben challenged her and both took another step. ‘You thought what?’

Y/N gulped, and she was feeling trapped. ‘I-I have been such a good girl for you. I made you cum. Almost two times.’

‘We had a deal, princess,’ Ben grinned and again, they took another step. ‘If you had made me cum a second time, then I would have considered letting you cum. But since you didn’t...’

Since Ben took another step towards Y/N, she automatically took a step backwards, only to find out that she couldn’t go back any further. Her back hit the wall with a thump and she looked up to Ben immediately. There it was again, that fucking smirk of his. This was his idea all along. He placed his hands next to her face and he watched her. He just watched her.

‘Stay, princess,’ he whispered. ‘Let me do my thing.’

Just hearing him say this, made Y/N’s pussy ache again. The wetness dripped on her thigh and she hoped that Ben would put his fingers there soon. Ben latched his lips at her throat, and he made a trail of kisses from her throat to her chest. He took both her breasts in his hands to massage them and at the same time, he sucked on one of her nipples. Y/N grabbed a hand full of his hair and she moaned. He switched to the other breast and he did the same thing there, he even nibbled at it. Y/N hissed and yanked harshly at his hair, which made Ben moan. Then, he placed kisses from her chest to her core. He positioned his hands on her thighs for grip. At this point, Y/N was whining and moaning. They wouldn’t be surprised if the others could hear them. Hell, Ben would be damn proud if they could, it made him feel powerful. Ben kissed Y/N’s pussy softly. He poked his tongue inside and started to lick her.

Now, his girl was screaming his naam. ‘Ben, Ben, Ben! Oh my god, don’t stop. Deeper, Ben!’

Ben was glowing with pride. His lips found her clit and he sucked on it. Y/N tugged harder at his hair and tears were forming in her eyes. He made her feel so good. He always made sure that she felt good, even when they were in their dom/ sub role.

‘Ben, can I please cum? Please?’ she pleaded. ‘I’m so close.’

When he heard her say that, he pulled back and stood up. His chin was glistering from her juices and he shook his head.

‘I was only making you ready for my cock,’ he said challenging. ‘Stay there, don’t move.’

Y/N her breathing was uneven, her chest heaved. Yet again he denied her, her orgasm. She wanted to complain and whine, but she knew that she would be in trouble if she did that. And she didn’t want to risk another punishment. Knowing Ben, he wouldn’t let her cum if she made another mistake.

Her eyes followed her boyfriend. He strutted towards the bed and he made his way to the bedside table. He opened a drawer and he rummaged around in it. This gave Y/N a chance to look around the room for the first time tonight. The bedroom was very elegant, the design was neat and the room itself was spacious. There were two big wardrobes, a couple of cabinets, a big tv screen, a book shelve, and she saw a door that would probably lead to an ensuite bathroom. But when she saw some photographs and posters on the wall, her heart stopped beating.

‘B-ben,’ Y/N muttered. ‘Is this Roger his room?’

Ben hummed, he was still looking for something in the bedside table. ‘Yeah, it is.’

‘Did you know?’ Y/N asked him.

‘Of course,’ Ben grinned. ‘I thought, since you flirted with Roger... it would be nice to fuck is his room. Don’t you agree? Ah, got it!’

He turned around and he held a condom wrapper in his hand. His other hand was wrapped around his length, he was stroking himself again. Y/N couldn’t understand why, because he was still rock hard. His tip touched his belly and Y/N almost came because of that sight. He came back to her and stood still right in front of her.

‘Do you remember when we watched 6 Underground together?’ he asked out of nowhere.

He stood so close to her, that she could feel his length nudging her belly. Cautiously, she put her hands on his abs and she caressed him.

‘Y-yeah, how could I forget?’ Y/N answered.

‘Do you also remember when you paused the move during that shot where I was dangling from a building,’ he continued with a smirk. ‘And the only thing that kept me from falling was that necklace between my teeth?’

Y/N whimpered. ‘Yes.’

‘Then you also remember that you looked from the screen to me,’ he said. ‘And wondered “what else can that mouth do?”.

Y/N nodded, and her fingers dug into Ben’s delicate skin. She was squirming against the wall and especially now that Ben has pushed her against it again. Their foreheads were almost touching. And then, within a snap, Ben snatched her wrist and he pushed them above her head. Y/N gasped, she couldn’t handle the tension anymore.

‘Ben, please,’ she whimpered.

‘Oh no, princess,’ Ben said with a fake pout. ‘The fun is just getting started. I am about to give you a demonstration about what else that mouth can do.’

Y/N frowned, she didn’t understand. ‘But you already showed me what else that mouth can do. You went down on me.’

Ben chuckled. He released her hands and he showed her the condom wrapper that he still held. The two of them kept eye contact. He put the wrapper between his teeth, and he ripped it, carefully but sexually, open. Y/N whimpered, and she couldn’t look away. He spitted the ripped of part out and slowly the took the condom out of the wrapper. He briefly inspected it and after he looked at Y/N.

‘Hold out your hand,’ he demanded, and she did it immediately. He put the condom in her hand. ‘Put it on me and keep looking at me.’

Y/N her breath was unsteady. She placed the condom on the tip of his length, and she rolled it down his dick carefully. She didn’t break the eye contact and she kept watching him.

Ben smiled and he pecked her lips. ‘Wonderful. I’m going to fuck you against the wall. I want you to scream, cry and moan my name. Let those fuckers know that I am the one pleasing you. Let them know that I am the one giving you the best time of your life. But remember princess, you are not allowed to cum, until I say so.’

‘I understand, sir,’ Y/N said while trembling and whimpering. ‘And I am not allowed to cum until you say so.’

Ben smiled and nodded. ‘Very well. Jump.’

Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Ben steadied himself and as soon as Y/N her back was pressed against the wall, he positioned his length in front of her entrance. After, he placed his hands were firmly placed on her arse. First he teased her a little bit, by nudging her entrance, but then, he pushed fully into her. He didn’t let her get used to him first, but that was okay for her, she wanted his cock so badly. Both moaned when Ben was inside her. Y/N felt full and Ben loved the feeling of her walls around his length. After he bottomed out, he began to thrust. His long and thick cock was hitting all the right spots and Y/N couldn’t stop moaning. Since she was so close to multiple orgasms, Y/N was sensitive, and she was ready to cum. Ben could also feel that his orgasm was beginning to form. Every time Ben thrusted into Y/N furiously, her back hit the wall. It was not possible that the others couldn’t hear them. Their moans, screams and curses were loud and don’t get started with the banging against the wall. Ben grunted when he felt Y/N’s walls clenching around his cock.

‘Fuck, princess,’ he moaned. ‘If you keep doing that, I’m not going to last very long.’

‘Then keep fucking me,’ she cried. ‘I’m almost there. Just a bit harder?’

Ben chuckled. ‘Harder? You are asking for it.’

If he wasn’t pounding into her already, he sure did now. His nails dug into her skin, while she gave him open mouth kisses against his throat. He pulled out of her, almost completely, after which he slammed into her forcefully.

Y/N moaned loudly. ‘Fuck, Ben, keep going. I’m about to cum.’

‘Clench your walls, princess,’ Ben grunted. ‘You’re so tight, it feels like your pussy is made for me, only me.’

Her tits bounced with every powerful stroke of Ben and he couldn’t keep his eyes of her. He also liked the hitting sound when Y/N’s back made contact with the wall, it gave him a kick. His thrusts were getting sloppy, because he was close. They both felt their orgasm building up in their stomach.

‘You’re doing so well, princess,’ Ben complimented her, and he kissed her forehead lovingly. ‘This is our best fuck.’

Y/N nodded and moaned. ‘Please, rub my clit, I’m almost cumming. Can I please cum?’

‘Begging again, aren’t you?’ Ben chuckled, but he moved one of his hands to her clit and he rubbed it slowly.

And there she was again, clenching her walls around his cock. Ben screamed her name and he felt his orgasm coming. Maybe two or three more thrusts and he would come. So that’s what he did, he pounded into his girl and slowly he retreated his hand. With an incredible loud moan, he came. He was trembling and shaking, and he rode out his high in a tired pace. Y/N noticed this, and she looked at Ben in full disbelieve. Did he really let her hanging? Again?

Ben rested his head against her chest and he carefully slipped out of her. ‘How was that, love?’

‘Seriously?’ Y/N huffed. ‘I didn’t cum! You didn’t give me an orgasm!’

When Ben had controlled his breathing again, he put Y/N back on her feet again and he kissed her cheek. ‘Yeah, I know.’

‘Excuse me – you know?’ Y/N said frustrated and she raised her voice a bit. ‘Are you joking?’

He removed the condom, tied it off and tossed it in the bin. ‘No, I’m not joking. I just taught you a lesson.’

‘You are seriously not getting me off?’ Y/N yelled, when Ben made his way to his clothes. ‘What the fuck, Ben?’

‘Watch your language, love,’ Ben warned her, and he put on his clothes again. ‘You were disrespectful tonight. Be grateful that I touched and kissed and licked your pussy tonight.’

Y/N raised her eyebrows. She couldn’t believe him, and she put her hands on her hips. Her thighs were still wet from all the excitement. And there he was, her fucking boyfriend. He stood in front of her, completely dressed again. He eyed her provokingly while his hand disappeared in his pocket. Ben pulled out his lighter and a pack of cigarettes. While keeping eye contact, he took one cigarette, put it between his lips and lit it up. Fuck, he looked so hot smoking.

‘Are you fucking kidding me,’ Y/N muttered under her breath.

Unfortunately, Ben heard her. His eyes darted to her, before he stalked towards her. He slammed his free hand on the wall, maybe a centimeter away from her face. Y/N gasped and whimpered. Secretly, she loved this angry and hotheaded side of him. She felt so intimidated at the moment, because he was fully clothed and she was still bare naked.

‘You fucking ungrateful brat,’ Ben growled, smoke blew in Y/N her face. ‘What did you think, huh? Did you really think that I was going to let you cum? After that stunt you pulled off downstairs? Calling Roger “sir”, squeezing his bicep and giving him those looks. Allowing Joe to lick liquor from your neck, touching his chest, you let him call you “babe” and you gave him nicknames. Oh no, sweetheart. And on top of that, you first suggested that one of them could do the belly shot off you. After that, you suggested that Joe could join us in the bedroom. You embarrassed me in front of my friends. No, princess. You should be grateful that I touched you at all tonight. I couldn’t give a fuck that you didn’t give off tonight. And you have two choices now, before I leave. One, you finger yourself, here and now. Or two, you don’t get yourself off and you wait a couple of minutes to cool down before you go downstairs. If you do that, I will promise you mind-blowing sex. Maybe even tonight, otherwise tomorrow. It’s your choice.’

Ben took a drag from his cigarette and he watched you closely. He saw her consider both options and he saw the struggle within her eyes. With a chuckle, he blew out the smoke.

He grabbed her chin again with a bit force, while he took another drag. The tension was noticeable in the air around them. The chuckled darkly and breathed out the smoke.

Promptly, he released her chin and he walked out of the room without. Before he closed the door, he looked back inside, the cigarette clenched between his teeth.

‘Choose wisely.’

#ben hardy smut #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy reader smut #ben hardy #ben hardy reader #ben hardy y/n smut

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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years

Text

15x03 Commentary

bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon (Kat)

@waywardbaby (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered (Giulia)

Opening my phone in the morning:

What the fuck happened

Kat: You don’t wanna know

Kat: You’ll find out soon enough

Zee: Yeah ok I went to tumblr. Why did I do that ?

Kat: SHAME ON YOU

Giulia: BECAUSE U HAVE 0 PATIENCE

Kat: If you wanted to know I could have told you

Zee: I just opened the freaking thing and glanced at the first thing on my dash. Clearly, it was the wrong thing to glance at. I yeeted out

Giulia: I DON T WANNA BE HERE

Giulia: will I cry

Kat: Do you want the honest answer

Giulia: No

Kat: Didn’t think so

Giulia: Im so tired already

Zee: Oh shush

Kat: Don’t I know it

Nat : ok i'm read

Nat : or not . whatever

Giulia: I’m not!! Help

Giulia: Ok im ready

Kat: Question first!

Zee: Uh oh

Giulia: I don t like it

Kat: With the download, do y’all have the green CW screen first?

US: no

Giulia: * stressed* Why

Kat: Because I watch my recording, I don’t download so I want to make sure I start in the same spot

Giulia: Oh ok.... Geez

Zee: Are we ready?

Nat : Are we all not ready

Kat: I think we are right?

Nat : 3

Nat : 2

Nat : 1

Nat : go

Giulia: Ghost’s town again yay

Nat : Unpopular opinon: I hope Ketch dies

Kat: Sames

Giulia: Well he done anyway so

Kat: ...

Giulia: GREAT

Nat : idgaf about Ketch

Nat : AH GHOST TOWN THE 3RD YAY I'm so happy

Kat: Love these random ass hunters

Giulia: I see white pants I think Jensen jib10

Kat: SHUSH

Nat : Legit wanna throw my laptop away

R: The "Rafforza l'incantesimo"

my italian ass: GASPS

Giulia: Look at Rowena pretty dress

Kat: Yyyeessss that dress

Giulia: Also she brought a change

Zee: Came prepared

Nat : She's the thing that keeps me watching at the moment

Kat: Of course, it’s Rowena

Nat : UGH I felt that

Giulia: I felt dean

Zee: For me it’s deans legs and cas’s fed up face

Giulia: That place again

Giulia: What

Nat : Insert Joey gif: I'M SOOOOO SICK OF THIS TOOOOOWN

Giulia: Noted

oh look me walking with my tall friends

that door banging scared the shit out of me

R: Prendi cio che è debole, rendilo forte. D'una piuma d'oca, fai una spada.

Take what’s weak and make it stronger. Of a duck feather make it a sword

Giulia: OH ITALIAN

Zee: Is she speaking Italian?

R: Dalla nebbia, cemento possente, impenetrabile, inflessibile.

From fog, mighty concrete, impenetrable, inflexible

Giulia: SHE IS

R: Rendilo forte.

Make it stronger

Giulia: And pretty well too

Kat: It’s not working Sam

Zee: Connection lost. Check server

Giulia: Oh no

Kat: And down she goes

Giulia: Thanks

Zee: A real drink

Giulia: Lol

Kat: This look 🤣🤣🤣

Giulia: Gotta use it

Kat: Love the silent conversations

Giulia: Fuck off belphy

Nat : Ah angry ghosts . What else is new

Zee: I kinda love his sass

Kat: Same but I still want to stab him

Nat : Wow, imagine this was the last three episodes. It's over in a freaking ghost town. I'm still salty, can you see?

Giulia: Yeah that would fucking destroy me

Kat: Not at all you hide it so well

Giulia: That’s not who we are

Zee: Go Dean!! Tell them

Giulia: AWE SAM

Kat: Aw Sammy

Giulia: SAM

He’s so gentle . Such a big gentle giant, I love him.

Zee: Control your face Sam

Kat: That doesn’t happen. At all.

Giulia: YOU SHUSH THE FUCK DOWN

Giulia: that strap tho

Nat : Not gonna give up

Kat: He never does. Take a knee

Nat : He's like a leave in the wind, give up not giving up give up not giving up

Zee: Is he us?

D: Oh, I'm not freaked. I'm angry, okay? I'm pissed.

Giulia: I M PISSED TOO

Kat: THAT PISSED WAS SO COUNTRY

Kat: Jensen your Texas is showing

Giuls: And I’m loving it

Giulia: I need more then

D: Th-This... This sloppy-ass ghostpocalypse... that's Chuck's ending? No. No, I don't think so. After everything that he has put us through? I'll be damned if I'm gonna let some glorified fanboy get the last word.

Giulia: SLOPPY ASS GHOST APOCALYPSE

Nat : Sloppy Ass Ghost Apocalypse. Yeah, that's about sums it up

Zee: Glorified fan boy

Giulia: dean speaking up for the fandom

S: Anything useful in there? R: Not a thing.

sure

Nat : You don't have eyes

Nat : snorts

Zee: You don’t have eyes

Giulia: Ok that was funny

B: I got an idea, but, uh... you're not gonna like it.

Giulia: DON T

Giulia: TOUCH

Giulia: MAH BABY

Kat: You okay bb?

Giulia: no I’m fear

Kat: What

Giulia: Because i just remembered the season trailer. And i wanna be wrong

Zee: Surprised moose

Nat : Did he just say, minions

Nat : But that would mean that Belphy would stay on earth?

Kat: No he’d be in hell

Nat : Ah

Giulia: Ah

Giulia: ... I don t like this

Kat: DIBS ON SAMUEL

Nat : Dibs on Samuel

Giulia: Dibs on samuel

Zee: Dibs on Samuel

Nat : Hey

Giulia: AH sam witch confirmed

Nat : I'm calling Dibs on Dean then

Kat: NO

Giulia: Cas🙋🏼‍♀

Zee: Was waiting for Kat

R: Whoever does this, they'll be unprotected. No salt circles... all manner of angry spirits right up in their grill.

Nat : So yeah, Belphy wants Cas

Giulia: NO Don t look at my bb

B: I want protection.Muscle.

D: Yeah, Cass’ll go.

C: Well, it sounds like I don't have a choice.

Giulia: DEAN

Zee: Dean threw him under the bus

Giulia: ugh

Kat: Oh babe

Giulia: COME ON

Nat : Dean would literally do anything now

Nat : That's how desperate he is

Kat: YUP

Nat : I see more of Ketch than I ever wanted

future me: ain’t that right

Zee: His underwear are ridiculous

Kat: SNORTS

Nat : Kill him

Giulia: Jesus lady there is an apocalypse going on

random demon I don’t care about: And you won't give them up? Not for any price?

K: Not at any price.

Giulia: Aw ketch

Kat: ya happy Nat?

Nat : AHHHHH OMG YES

Giulia: Eh

Giulia: We are at 2 spn final season deaths already nice

Zee: Casually strolling the graveyard

B: You know, your part in all this is, uh, pretty dangerous.I mean, you could die, get trapped in Hell. Your friends might never see you again. Funny, 'cause, uh,they didn't seem to think twice about it.

R.U.D.E.

Nat :lol Cas

Giulia: AHAHAHAH

Zee: Ok

Kat: Hhhhhhhaaaahahhaaa

Giulia: DO I LOVE HIM

Giulia: witch stuff

Nat : And what's Dean's role in this?

Nat : I think I got distracted

Kat: Outside by the hole

Giulia: Being grumpy

Nat : Ah where he should be 😉

Kat: Ready and waiting lol

Giulia: Well you’d want him in

Nat : Well, not the whole of him

Zee: FOCUS LADIES

Zee: so fed up

C: Yet you needed protection, "muscle", for this?

B: Okay, you got me. I wanted company. I wanted your company. What? Shouldn't we at least try and be friends?

Nat : Belphy is Giuls

Giulia: WOW

Nat : You would want Cas' company too

C: You are not growing on anyone. Sam and Dean are just using you. Don't mistake that for caring about you, because I can assure you they don't.

B: Wow. You learn that the hard way?

Giulia: AWE NO BELPHY SHUSH

Kat: Cas should know

Nat : Sush

Giulia: OH THAT REALLY STUNG

C: You're wearing Jack, who was like a son to me, like a coat.

Zee: Like a son to me

C: It's an abomination.

Giulia: im sad. I’m so sad

Zee: I think you should wait

Kat: It’s gonna get worse bb

Giulia: DON T PUSH HIM

Nat : Why does Cas has to go in first

Giulia: what else is new

Zee: The muscle

Nat : Ah

Nat : Do we trust him?

Kat: WHAT DO YOU THINK

Zee: No

Giulia: I hate how I can recognize enochian

Giulia: I trust bel so little

Nat : I don't think he should say that out loud

Kat: SUNG

Giulia: Oh

Zee: What?

Giulia: WHAT

Kat: SING IT CAS

Giulia: OMG WHAT

Nat : Don't do it?

C: ♪ Toh-luh dah... ♪

Giulia: OH COME ON

Kat: That’s all you get lol

Giulia: fuck Oh great that was the “musical”

Nat : Ah Dean's at the hole

Nat : snorts

Kat: There might be a couple seconds more I can’t remember

Nat : Sam just thinks that he should be with Dean when this all goes to shit

Nat : And I cry

Giulia: ...great

Kat: Nope

C: ♪ ... mee ♪

Zee: Like an angel

Nat : WELL

Giulia: Oh fuck off

Zee: Oh fuck

Giulia: Well

Nat : Who is she again

Giulia: Ardat Some demon who wanted to kill bel

Nat : Ardat Lili is a dangerous storm spirit from ancient Sumeria, a vampiric succubus who visits men at night

Giulia: Thanks Hermione

Kat: Thanks google

Zee: Nerd

Nat : At least I know how to work google. Unlike the majority, it seems

Giulia: well I’m doing 3 things at the same time

Giulia: Everybody wants to rule hell. Nobody learned a thing from Crowley

Zee: It’s been a while since Cas got smacked

Giulia: He’s a fucking angel

Giulia: OF COURSE

Nat : THERE WAS A VACANCY. Pfffff

Kat: Ugh he’s so annoying

Zee: That close up Giuls ?

Giulia: I KNOW EXCITING

Nat : Ah the wind in Dean's hair

Nat : I need that close up Giuls

Kat: The wind in Cas’ trench

Nat : lol in Cas' shirt

Giulia: that hand holding

Kat: 😭

Giulia: I’m having anxiety

Zee: We see

Kat: YOU SHOULD

Nat : Shouldn't Cas go out before it closes. Before Dean throws that bomb in?Ah, too late

Giulia: I can t take it

Giulia: DEAN. DEAN FUCK

Zee: COME ON

Kat: He’s got business

Giulia: CAS

Giulia: what

Kat: IT’S NOT HIS FAULT AT THE MOMENT

Giulia: What is happening

Giulia: I’m so angry at everyone

Kat: CAS IS MAD

B: It's me... Jack.

Giulia: JACK SHUT UP

Zee: NO

Giulia: OH NO

The struggle Castiel going through is painful ok. I hate it , HATE IT.

Nat : Ah so Jack is gone?

Kat: His body I guess

Giulia: I HATE THIS

Nat : For good?

Giulia: FUCK NO

Zee: WTF

Giulia: WHAT WAS THAT SIGH

Well this destroyed me .

future me: AH JUST YOU WAIT DUMB BITCH

Kat: That wasn’t Jack

Nat : Because he's still in the empty, right? He's forgotten there

Giulia: FUCK

Kat: Death has plans

Zee: CAS

Oh you can see the moment Castiel feels like he’s got nothing left . great.

Nat : What

Giulia: ROWENA

Nat : WHAT

Kat: JUST FUCKING WAIT

R: Won't need that where I'm going.

Nat : Ah fuck

R: Magic can do anything, Samuel , can contain anything... even the vast multitudes of Hell.

Giulia: I HATE THIS

Zee: WHAT?

Giulia: NO

Nat : If I pay the price

R:"Death Is an Infinite Vessel." A spell so simple it draws its power from its caster.Just two ingredients.

S: Rowena, why didn't you tell us?

shut up Sam

R: Because, dear, the first ingredient is my own still-coursing blood. And the last is my final breath.

Giulia: I DON T LIKE THE PRICE

Nat : Rowena loves them to much

Zee: Hold on HOLD ON

Giulia: i love her so much

R: I'll absorb the ghosts and demons and return them to Hell.In time, my body'll break down, and they'll be released right where they belong.

S: No, no. No. Rowena... no.

Giulia: GREAT

Nat : NO AH

Giulia: I DON T WANNA SEE SAM CRY

R: To perform this spell, I have to die. And it has to be you that kills me.

Nat : Right, in every death book of Rowena, she's killed by Sam

Kat: POOR SAMMY

Giulia: OF COURSE GREAT

Zee: HE GOT OUT

Kat: SEE HE GETS OUT

Giulia: BUT AT WHAT PRICE

Kat: MIGHT BE BETTER IF HE STAYED THOUGH

Giulia: WHAT ?! YIKES

R: My real, permanent demise is at your hands. It's in Death's books.

S: Yeah, well, you know what? Screw the books.

Us: *LOUD GASP*

D: Wh-What about the Crook?

C: It's gone. It was destroyed.

That what is so ..... wow

R: I don't care about anything enough to take my own life.Not you, your brother... not even the world. But I believe in prophecy. I believe in magic. And I'm here, and you're here, and everything we need to end this right is in our hands.I know this in my bones...it has to be this way. Do it! Kill me, Samuel!

Nat : I'm-

Kat: 😭😭😭😭😭

Giulia: I’m

Zee: INDONT WANNA WATCH

Giulia: I CANT TAKE ALL THIS

Nat : Fuck, Sammy

Giulia: OH MY GOD SAM

Nat : Sam is too fragile for that

Kat: I BELIEVE IN PROPHECY AND MAGIC 🤣😭😭

R: I know we've gotten quite fond of each other, haven't we? But will you let the world die, let your brother die, just so I can live?

Giulia: NO SHUT UP

Zee: Shut up Rowena

Giulia: NO

Nat : Dean's pissed. What else is new

Giulia: NO NO

Nat : NO

Giulia: SAM

Nat : NOOOOO

Giulia: FUCK

Zee: God damn

Kat: NNNOOOOOOOOO

Giulia: STOP IT

Kat: She says Dean’ll die and Sam gets stabby

Giulia: NO ROWEEEENAAA

R: That's my boy.

Kat: THATS MY BOY

Nat : Of course

Giulia: WHAT IS THAT FACE SAM

Giulia: FUCK OFF

Giulia: FUCK THESE EPISODES

Nat : OH NO

Giulia: SHIT

Kat: IS IT BETTER OR WORSE THAN BORING

Nat : SAMMY CONTROL YOUR FUCKING FACE

Giulia: IM NOT READY

Giulia: NO DON T SAY THAT

Kat: JUST LIKE CROWLEY

Giulia: COME ON

Zee: CAN THE MUSIC NOT

Nat : CAS

Giulia: CAS BB

Giulia: WHY AM I SO TIRED

Zee: IMAGINE HOW SAM IS FEELING

Nat : HENLEY

Giulia: oh dean is in the nude

Zee: BUTT NAKED

Kat: SUCH GOOD SINGLE LAYER HENLEY PORN

Giulia: Oh he was crying In his room

Nat : Does Sam actually fit in the bed?

Giulia: Ah yeah ketch too

Kat: Okay I know it’s super sad but these boys are looking GOOD

Giulia: I KNOW AND IM SANGRY

I’M STILL MOURNING OK

C: How's Sam?

D: Not great.

Kat: Get ready babes

C: Sorry about Rowena.

Giulia: No i refuse

Zee: WHAT?

Nat : NO

Giulia: Fuck

Nat : Don't you throw this in Kat

D: You're sorry? Why didn't you just stick to the damn plan?

Giulia: I DON T WANNA WATCH

C: He wanted to eat every last soul to take over Hell, Earth, and every...

D: Yeah, and we would've figured it out... after. With Rowena.

OK but listen...figuring it out later could have been worse , although it’s true that Rowena was a real great asset. Idk man I’m hurting

Giulia: i can feel dean’s anger

Nat : Dean control your anger

C: Something went wrong. You know this. Something always goes wrong.

D: Yeah, why does that something always seem to be you?

Kat: Oooohhhh boy

Nat : WHAT

Giulia: NO

Nat : DID YOU JUST SAY

Giulia: DEAN U FUCK

you can see the shock and hurt and heartbreak on Cas’ face but it’s fine , it’s fine WE’RE FINE

C: You used to trust me, give me the benefit of the doubt. Now you can barely look at me.

They both so hurt and I cannot bear this

Zee: Can’t breathe

C: My powers are failing, and...

yeah can we talk about that ? becasue...why the fuck

C: and I've tried to talk to you, over and over, and you just don't want to hear it. You don't care.

Nat : The eyeroll

Giulia: I HATE THIS SHIT

Kat: I know bb

SO ANGRY

C: I'm... dead to you.

SO SAD

Nat : The eyeroll

Giulia: I HATE THIS SHIT

Kat: I know bb

Giulia: IS THIS FANFIC

Giulia: I READ THIS 364830173 TIMES

C: You still blame me for Mary.

Giulia: NO

C: Well, I don't think there's anything left to say.

D: Where you going?

IS THIS FANFIC

Nat : CAS IS GOING AWAY

Nat : CAS STAY

Kat: You knew it was happening bb

Zee: WHAT

Zee: THE

Zee: FUCK

C: Jack's dead. Chuck's gone. You and Sam have each other.

Giulia: NO THIS SONG

Nat : I know

Kat: I know

C: I think it's time for me to move on.

Zee: STOP HIM YOU ASSUOLE

Nat : I knew it but I'm not happy about it

Kat: Group hug

Giulia: WELL DEAN LOOKS REGRETFUL SO AT LEAST THERE’S THAT

Kat: As per usual. He lashes out then is sorry about it.

Nat : That's human

Giulia: HEY YALL CAN TALK TO MY CORPSE

Giulia: TRAILER TIME BECAUSE IM IN DENIAL

Giulia: MEH

Nat : Yeah well, the next ep is kinky

Giulia: gag me

Kat: Yup

Giulia: My heart is broken. This ep destroyed me

Kat: I know bb

Zee: DONT LIKE THE PROMO

Giulia: FUCK OFF THE PROMO I DON T GIVE 2 SHITS ABOUT IT

Kat: But Jensen directed

Zee: Dean was exceptionally assholy

Nat : We'll get Lumberjack Dean

Kat: That too

Giulia: dean is on a real fine thread

Giulia: I think that’s when there is samifer

Kat: Well the red was there And it was red when we see bearded!dean

Giulia: I currently don’t give a shit honestly

Kat: They’ll make up by the end

Giulia: Yeah i wanna see when

Giulia: Whatever I’m so tired

Giulia: Fuck off

Giulia: Im also pretty real sad. And that hasn’t happened in long on spn

Kat: Jensen said in an interview it hasn’t happened yet so we’ll see

Zee: We all are

Kat: I know. I knew exactly how y’all would react

Giuls: Ok but it’s not even about destiel. I just hate to see them fight instead of working together

Giulia: My stomach hurts too now. I should go. Kat go the fuck to sleep. And nobody talks to me about the ep

Kat: I AM TALKIN TO ZEE

Giulia: Hush i can still hear you over the sound of my soul crying

Zee: In my defense, I told her to sleep

Kat: Give your soul a tissue

Kat: She did. Many times. I didn’t listen like usual

Giulia: That vinyl now looks real good to ease my pain. Not gonna lie

Zee: Take me with you. I’ll probably be a mile back but still

Giulia: I rewatched the end briefly because I’m a dumb bitch. And yep, i can confirm i screamed into my pillow and got actually teary eyed and boi am I dumb to get actually tears for a tv show jesus and it’s only ep 3 but the threat of the ending is getting tight around my neck already and this is stupid, and fuck. And bye

Giulia: People are hating over everything right now

Kat: Yup. People hate Cas, people hate Dean, people hate the town (@Nat ) Plus, I think it, being the last season, makes people lash out more.

Nat : Hey

Kat: Did I lie?

Nat : No but it still hurts

Kat: Well they’re away from it now At least there’s that

Giulia: Why, where are they Idk

Kat: Do I have to say it?

Giulia: Say what

Kat: Where people are. I don’t think you wanna hear it

Giulia: Exactly

Kat: So we won’t say it lol

Giulis: For what it’s worth all the people throwing hate at Dean and Castiel can all suck my dick.

If you want to get tagged send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @wayward-angelgirl @destiel-honeypie @mariekoukie6661 @dragontamerm @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat @bunnybaby121115 @aliaitee2 @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc @dammitsammy @legendary-destiel @winchesterprincessbride @destielhoneybee @ravenhg @evvvissticante @emoryhemsworth

#Episode commentary #episode 15x03 #supernatural 15x03 #15x03 commentary #Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #Jared Padalecki #ruthie connell #rowena #castiel #dean winchester #Sam Winchester

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inevitable-anna · 5 years

Text

Escape The Night S4X01 Spoilers

I’m so sorry that this took so long! I accidentally deleted my draft, when I went to post it!

Hopefully, this should have a ‘keep reading’ thing so I don’t spoil the show for anyone.

[[MORE]]

I love the flashback of the first three seasons in the beginning! And uggghh Colleen's screams from the maiden still give me chills.

Yass that's my gal Liza "I'll come back for you" yes I love my explorer gal so much, I hope we see more of he- oh wait, she's dead. I do have some questions about her, so I may put them in another post if you are interested?

I don't trust the SAE. They still seem sketchy to me?

Everyone in the fandom had really cool and interesting theories about Bretman and why he was in this season. Then he finally shows up and it turns out Nikita (who looks great!) invited him and told him there'd be cute boys.

"what about me? I did cancel my livestream for this" Mat I love you.

The Collector looks awesome and she has a jewelled key! The medusa monster with her looks great too!

Anyone else slightly creeped out that the guests are wearing different outfits to the ones they died in? Did the Collector spend time picking out a new role and outfit for each guest? Did she make her lieutenants have a fashion show for her to see what outfits she liked? Did she have folders on potential roles and outfit ideas? I need answers here!

MY FAVOURITE GAL IS BACK!!! RO'S BACK! "She's dead, I'm dead, so I'm dead... so where am I?" I love her so much! Please let her escape this time!

I love Gabbie immediately asking questions, like 'the last thing I remember is having my heart ripped out and dying... so is everyone here dead? Let me check'.

"You literally pushed me into the box, Ro!" "We-well, everybody did"

"Umm... Alex, maybe "you know I killed both of you, right?" isn't the best thing to say at the moment?

I love Destorm and Gabbie immediately teaming up again, it's nice that they still have each other's backs!

I can't really see who says "did you kill me?" (Sounds a bit like Tana?) And who responded with "I thought you died with Vine?" But I love it so much.

"Hugs and kisses"? Really, Joey? "I do not like this" well! They probably didn't enjoy dying!

Anyone else slightly curious as to why Tana dressed like a cowgirl if her role is the 'Pin-Up Girl?' Am I being dumb?

JUSTINE! You have other things to worry about then 'residuals'! Do the smart thing, okay? get your residuals after/if you escape! Duh!

"You can't double die" are you sure about that, Destorm? I mean, this is 'Escape The Night' where the only consequence is death, even when you've already died!

"Nikita said there was going to be cute boys" "where?" Gabbie!

I'm loving Gabbie taking charge! "Okay, everyone stop fighting, I'm freezing. I look amazing but let's figure this out" anyone else get major "I'm hungry!" vibes from S2?

*guards appear* "I'm thinking maybe we are in heaven." Not the time Ro!

My man! Alex! He went off on that guard! He's come along way from "nobody was able to escape their deaths so I'm not going to try and fight mine" to attacking a guard! I mean, he lost the fight but he tried!

"The Enforcer don't run. I strut" yass, Destorm!

The Sorceress is back!! My favourite villain! "Last time we met, we killed each other, shall we do it again?" This is why the Sorceress is my favourite villain! She's so sassy!

Mortimer is back! Not sure if I trust him though?

"Mortimer is my man from when I was still alive, however somehow since I died, I have gotten married and had a baby" I laughed so hard at this because I didn't expect it at all!

Mortimer asking "Colleen, are you with Janet" is so sad! Though in the show, did he call her Janet or mum? Because isn't it slightly strange to refer to his mum as Janet? I don't know, I'm probably reading into this too much?

Tana doesn't remember what the Sorceress looks like? Gabbie's reply is brilliant! "She killed you, me and Destorm."

"She killed Alex, huh? I mean, you tell me, I was dead"

The Collector kept the Sorceress in her study?

The Sorceress teasing Joey with the onyx trinket is everything I needed in life!

Joey calling out the Sorceress for having a giant portrait of herself in her mansion after she calls the Collector a "pretentious b*tch" for having one is amazing!

"Isn't she a copycat?" Can the Sorceress stay with the group the whole season and make sassy comments, please?

"She wanna be you so bad" "Mm-hmm"

Okay, I have said this a few times already but I'll say it again, 'final death' SERIOUSLY?

"I like know I've done a lot of bad stuff and I might go to hell but I really didn't think it would be this early in life" and "I have been told quite a few times that there is a special place in hell for me, so, I don't think it will be too bad" are moods.

I find Destorm and Tim complaining about the others following the Sorceress really funny.

I laughed so hard at "I always learned never to trust strange, white women".

Tim attacking the air and saying "you gotta come around the corner like this" is really funny to me.

"Thanks for the help" Colleen, I can taste the sarcasm there.

I like that Alex understands that having a grudge against Joey is slowing them down, otherwise they would still be stuck in there for their 'final deaths' come morning.

20:59 isn't the painting that Tana takes down from the Sorceress' mansion in S2X04?

Destorm says he doesn't know who to trust so he's taking the lead, to me, that sounds like a logical thing to do?

"Now more shirtless men with knives are running at me, what is going on?" Well, you did agreed to come back for S4, Tana!

22:06 IT'S AN EGYPTIAN RUBIX CUBE!

I wasn't sure what to think when Bretman was announced for the S4 cast, but now he's here, I actually really like him! He's funny and I like that he sincerely thanks Justine for giving him the egg/eye thing. I look forward to seeing more of him in the show!

It's nice that Destorm is realising that Tana is more than a pretty face, now for the rest of the S2 group to realise that. It was one of the things that really annoyed me in S2 that they kept saying that Tana wasn't helping but when she offered to do something, the group wouldn't let her do it.

"Originally I was here on a rescue mission, but I feel like I just made things worse." Well, you haven't really rescued anyone yet? I mean, yes the guests are free from the exhibits but they're still trapped in the museum.

Joey, I agree with Tim! Make the guards dab or even better... make them twerk!

"Can they tell us where to find some food?" "I have breast milk" I choked.

I was not expecting the Sorceress to stab that guard! I mean, I guessed that the Sorceress would still be evil but I hope she sticks with the group for a little longer, purely because she's my favourite!

"This is something. A clue." The way Ro says clue is so cute and reminds me of 'Scooby Doo' for some reason?

"Most frightening exhibit yet" mark me down as terrified and intrigued!

Again, 'FINAL DEATHS' COME ON!

"It's fine, the SAE will get here before we even have to do any of that." Are you sure about that, Joey? Really sure? 100% sure? Absolutely, positively 100% sure?

Ro is so happy when Destorm tells the group about door. "Look at you being a team player" I would like to see them interact more, I feel like they would have an interesting dynamic.

"I think we just opened the Egyptian exhibit" really, Alex? I thought this was the Tudor exhibit! Because the Tudors love of Egyptian hieroglyphics is very well known!

Tana is pulling her weight and I love how the S2 group are like 'what? How?'.

The prosthetic makeup on the Pharaoh is amazing! He looks great!

"This beef jerky looking ass b*tch" Bretman is great!

At the end when the 'this season' bit plays, I slowed it down and watched it and spotted a Minotaur! Which will be awesome as I love Greek mythology!

Okay, so if you watch the 'this season' section, right at the end, you can see Benjamin/The Man With No Name so has the Collector collected previous lieutenants?

Again, I’m sorry that I didn’t get to post this yesterday because I was stupid and accidentally deleted my draft!

I hope you enjoy it and I would love to hear about anything you noticed during the episode or any questions! If you like this, I may be able to try and do one for ep2 as well.

Have a nice day!

#escape the night spoilers #escape the night all stars #escape the night 4 #escape the night

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chloecarsonwrites · 6 years

Text

What Joey Left Behind

TW: descriptions of kidnapping, infidelity, and brief mention of the corpse of a child.

Word Count: 4.5k

“Natalia...it’s time. You and I both know we can’t keep living like this.” My heart paused, then started beating twice as fast as before. I could feel the tips of my ears grow hot, and I knew that they were bright red. I gripped the countertop at the kitchen sink so hard my knuckles went white, staring out the window at a single blade of grass in the yard that my eye had fallen on to ground myself in the midst of what my estranged husband had just said. I looked over my shoulder at him where he was sitting at the kitchen island, the sweaty glass of ice water I had poured for him remaining untouched. He looked up and caught my eye; I immediately averted my gaze as if he was a stranger that had caught me staring at him. “So this is it then,” I sighed, trying to keep my voice steady. “What now? We go to an attorney or something?” “No...I think we can settle most of it ourselves. I mean, we’ll have to go to an attorney to settle the logistics and legality of it all. But I think that we both know that we can’t afford a legal battle between the two of us over money, property, and custody. I’ll make is as easy on my part as possible, if you agree to do the same. You can have the house. Hell, I basically live in the motel on 5th street as it is, I’m sure I can stay there a few weeks until I get an apartment.” I could see the gears turning in his head as he spoke. “All I ask for is joint custody of Edith. I know that I haven’t exactly been...there for her these past couple of years, but I still love her just as much as you do. We can discuss how often we each have her for, but I can’t just give her up altogether. It would ruin me.” I turned towards the fridge, focusing on a lighthouse magnet holding up a picture of Edith and her kindergarten teacher on the first day of school. I didn’t want him to see me brush away a tear that I hadn’t been able to keep in. “Yeah, you’re right...this...isn’t how married people should be living. My brother has a friend who he went to law school with. I’ll call him tomorrow. Maybe we can get a good deal and only be out a small fortune rather than a large one.” - Joseph was seven years old when he disappeared. Everybody in our 2,459 person town was a suspect, and all 2,459 people suspected each other. Losing the dynamic of trust between us all was foreign and filled us all with paranoia. Was there a kidnapper or a murderer living among us? People just didn’t go missing in little towns like ours in the middle of northern Michigan, which felt like an oasis in the middle of a world run rampant with terror. Parents let their children run around town until after dark and only worried if they didn’t return for dinner. To this day, I wonder if that’s where we went wrong. That night was like any other. It was the middle of July, and even though the sun had retired for the night, the summer air was in the upper 80s and thick with humidity, the kind that sticks to your skin. The backyard was illuminated by the fireflies that sparkled like droplets of dew when they catch the sun. I remember exactly what he was wearing the last time I saw him: old, faded denim shorts covered his pale and freckled legs; his favorite yellow t-shirt printed with pawprints hung off of his thin-framed shoulders. He also wore his purple sneakers that were always caked with dirt and mud because of how much he loved to adventure in them. The search party found one of them, the left one, less than 200 meters from our house in a stream just past the tree line. They gave it to Benjamin and me, said they thought it would help us get through the hard time. Once they had milked it of all the evidence they could, I hid it in the attic and never went back for it again. They say that the first 72 hours during a missing person case are crucial, that after those 72 hours, the chances of recovering said missing person alive decrease to nearly impossible odds. I remember watching the clock as the 72nd hour faded into the 73rd, begging with time itself and whatever higher power was out there to make that stovetop clock stop ticking, to give us a little more time to find our son. I had seen the missing person postings, the ones that described men and women who had disappeared as children and had been missing for 10, 20, 30 years. How did their families cope, knowing that they were more likely to find their children dead than alive? Joseph was our only child. After his disappearance, there was a kind of hole left in our family, if you could even call us that anymore. Two and a half years later, around the time that Joey would have turned 10, we had another child, a daughter, and named her Edith. We told ourselves that we weren’t trying to replace Joey, but deep down, I think we both knew that we were. We had never planned to have another child. We were both well into our late thirties. I was past my prime childbearing years. We never gave up hope on finding Joey--but I had hoped against hope that once we had Edith, I could finally be at peace. I should have known that peace never comes to the parents of missing children. They suspected that he had drowned in the river on the edge of our town, hidden from all eyes by the trees and brush, and that his body had floated down to the reservoir and sunk to the bottom. It, of course, was too expansive and deep to scour the entire thing, not that they didn’t try. I, however, had theories of my own. Had someone swept into town that day and plucked him off of the jungle gym at the park and was across state lines before we even knew something was amiss? Had he been lured into some trap under the guise of promised sweets and toys? He was only seven, after all--he was too young and innocent to know that there were people in this world that didn’t have good intentions. Benjamin dismissed my ideas with little more than an eyeroll and a wave of his hand, arguing that kidnappings “simply don’t happen here”. But lack of occurence doesn’t mean lack of possibility. Edith’s childhood was far different than Joseph’s, to put it lightly. She would run up to me, begging to go outside and play with her kindergarten friends at the river. I would open my mouth, about to say, “of course, Edie, you can go”, only to find the image of Joey’s body at the bottom of the reservoir, bloated and waterlogged, taunting me from somewhere in the deepest part of my brain. It felt wrong to shelter her so much, like I was doing a disservice to such an adventurous spirit. Edith was the type of person who couldn’t be chained--she saw our fence as a cage rather than protection. She ran our yard in her princess light-up Sketchers from dusk until dawn, when we finally coerced her into coming inside, or until she tired herself out. I wanted to let her explore our little town--which, to a child, seems like the whole world. But whenever I was about to let her go beyond that freshly painted white picket fence that now bordered our yard, there Joey was, thrashing about in the river’s rapids, or crying for help from the back of a stranger’s van. I went over that day in my head, time and time again for months. Who had been the last adult to see him? It was concluded that it was myself, when I sent him out to play after lunch. He said he was going to the park to play with Harriet and Lucas from school, and was only supposed to be half a mile away. “You know the rules, Joey, be back for dinner at 6,” I reminded him as he skipped off, his orange hair bouncing atop his head. “I know, Mommy, I will!” he called back, barely looking back at me over his shoulder. “I love you, honey!” “I love you more, Mommy,” I heard him respond, even though he had already rounded the corner. The authorities were never able to conclude whether he ever got to the park or not, because his friends had apparently forgotten about their play date. Did he see that his friends weren’t there, and decide to go play in the river instead? Had he wandered just outside of town and gotten lost? Too many factors were missing to conclude anything, and we had to live with the unknown. I can’t place the day that our marriage began to crumble. Neither of us wanted to admit it, of course, that when Joey had left us he had taken with him our entire family dynamic and nearly all of the love that Benjamin and I had once felt for one another. We tried to keep it together, for Joey’s sake, as if he would be hurt to know that his parents’ marriage was falling apart because of him. Around a year and a half after Joey left, we sat at our worn kitchen table, only two out of the three chairs occupied. We sat across from each other in a tense silence that was screaming the things we wanted to say. We hadn’t spoken in days, and hadn’t slept in the same bed in over a month. We had fallen into some kind of unspoken agreement where we would take turns sleeping on the couch. “How...how have you been?” I timidly asked. His head shot up, a look of genuine surprise that I had spoken painted on his face. “Oh, you know...fine. The usual.” I nodded slowly and turned back to my plate, feeling as though I had just spoken to a stranger. I poked at my pasta with my fork before dropping it onto the ceramic and blurting out the words I had been dying to say. “You know, we don’t have to be this way with each other. I don’t want to be this way. Please, talk to me. I see you every day but I miss you like you’ve been away for months.” He sat there in silence, but I could tell that he felt the same. Ben was never good at vocalizing his feelings, so I had become very good at deciphering his body language over the years. “Why don’t we do something?” I was practically begging. “All we do is sit in this godforsaken house and wallow in our self-pity. We’re never going to get better if we don’t start communicating.” And so we did. We began going to church even though neither of us were very religious, sitting in the very back pew, a foot apart as if we were strangers. We took a three-month long trip to the Canadian archipelago, to a secluded cabin on Baffin Island where Edith was conceived, just to escape the whirlwind chaos that our lives at home had become. For a few years, it worked--we were as close to happy as we could be, tackling each new day as they came. But the euphoria of our revitalized marriage was only a facade. It started a year after our trip to Canada, when Edith was only a few months old. Benjamin stopped coming home after work, instead escaping to the amnesia that was offered to him by the bottle and the company of other women. He never told me outright that he was unfaithful, but I knew from the way he stumbled through the front door at 3AM smelling like whiskey and a perfume that I didn’t own, and the purple bruises that I didn’t leave starting to show under his right ear and just above his collarbone. “Ben,” I started, trying my best to keep my voice steady. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried out of my mind.” He placed a wet kiss on my cheek and called me a name that I didn’t know, Iris, before trudging off to Joey’s room in his drunken stupor, already asleep before collapsing onto the twin bed that was covered in a thin layer of dust from disuse. I let out a shaky breath and wiped away the tears that escaped before going to Edith’s room to put her back down, as she had been awoken by the ruckus. This happened, more and more frequently, until around five months after that first incident when Benjamin stopped coming home altogether, instead appearing randomly on a Saturday morning or a Tuesday night and staying for a few days before leaving again to chase whatever escape he had learned to occupy himself with. We lived like that for years, exchanging words maybe once every few weeks, and they were never kind. I would ask him when he next planned to come home--usually because I wanted to rekindle the romance we once had. I wanted us to cook a nice dinner and have him see the daughter he barely knew, but the truth was, we barely knew each other anymore. I imagined our kitchen table with all the seats occupied, Edith filling the spot where Joey once sat. Me, setting the table, and Ben putting dessert in the oven. We would discuss Edith’s school friends and Ben’s work obligations. That was never the case, though. “I don’t know when I’ll be home again, Nat. Maybe if you didn’t bitch so much when I was here, I would like coming home a little bit more,” he said, speaking to me as if I was a small child that needed to be reprimanded. “No Ben, you would like being here if you could drink and sleep with women who aren’t your wife, but you can’t. That’s why you leave for days on end and then show up unannounced, not because I’m a bitch.” With that, he launched himself out of the worn armchair and marched towards the front door that he had stumbled through only 45 minutes prior. He slid his boots on, not bothering to tie the laces, and was gone again without another word. - A month after Ben brought up the divorce, we sat at our old kitchen table, in front of the papers we had drawn up concerning the division of our assets. I wore a pair of painful black heels and a blouse with the top two buttons undone, a part of me hoping that he would see me the way he did when we first met and decide to repair what was left of our relationship, or at least, what was left of it. I was seeing Benjamin for the first time in a month and a half; his longest boozing trip away from home yet. When I saw him, however, he looked like he hadn’t spent those six weeks wasted in a dirty motel room with a woman whose name he didn’t know. He was clean-shaven and had cut his hair so that it no longer brushed his collar, and he looked strikingly like the man I had once been in love with, the one who had painted the walls of the house we no longer shared and made mud pies with the son we no longer had. I had almost forgotten what he looked like under the scruff and disheveled hair, and it was uncanny how much of him I saw in Edith, from the pointed nose to the green eyes and chestnut brown hair. I wonder if he saw it too. He had always been jealous of me for having so much resemblance with Joey while his own features were nowhere to be seen in our son. Was he happy now, that he had a child who was so clearly his own? My handwriting was shaky due to the trembling of my hand. I was overflowing, bursting at the seams with things that I wanted to ask and say to him. I felt like it wasn’t right though, that he was a stranger, and that I had no place asking him the things I so badly wanted to. Eventually I broke. “What happened to you?” I suddenly blurted out, the first sentence spoken between the two of us in 20 minutes. “What do you mean?” he responded, meeting my eye with his brows quizzically furrowed. “I mean how you look. Last time you were here you were unrecognizable. Is there a reason that you’ve gotten all cleaned up?” Part of me hoped it was for me, an attempt to win me back. “I guess I just needed a change. Especially for the...occasion. It didn’t seem like the type of thing to show up to looking like a mess.” I fought back a chuckle at that, the implication that this was an “occasion”. It was just us in our kitchen under a single dim overhead light. He hadn’t put any effort into his appearance around me for the past six years. What reason did he have to start now? But when I thought about it, I had also dressed up, only I was trying to win him back. Something was telling me that Ben had dressed up to salvage my view of him, not to make me swoon. He noticed my smirk. To my surprise, he didn’t immediately become hostile. “What’s that look for?” he asked with a grin. “It’s nothing, you just haven’t been this cleaned up in God knows how long. I wonder if Edith even recognizes you,” Edith probably hadn’t seen her Dad looking like this in over a year, and to a six-year-old, a year feels like a decade. “Speaking of her, where is she? I’ve been here for nearly an hour and she hasn’t come down to see me yet.” Despite the demons he was battling with and all the pain he had put me through, I knew that Ben still loved Edith more than anything in this world. My stomach sank a little at his question. The truth is, Edith wasn’t sure if Benjamin actually wanted to see her. It had been a while since he made time for her. I knew that she was probably upstairs, playing with her Dreamhouse and trying not to cry. My heart squeezed painfully at that the thought of her little six-year-old cheeks shining with tears because she thought her daddy didn’t love her. In all honesty, I didn’t know if he did, either. “She’s upstairs in her room. I can call for her, if you want?” I offered. “Yes, please. It’s been so long since I saw her,” he replied, nodding. I got up from my seat and walked to the bottom of the stairs. “Edie!” I called, “Do you want to come see Dad?” I heard the tiny gasp of excitement and the footsteps running to the stairs as her compact body came into view. She skipped down the stairs, holding two Barbies in her hands as her brown waves and pink tutu bounced around her. She had a huge grin on her face, revealing her two missing front teeth. It was remarkable how similar her mannerisms were compared to Joey’s. She was reaching the age he had been, and even though Joey was shy and timid and Edith was firey and bold, I suppose that some things between all children are constant. “Daddy!” she exclaimed in a high-pitched screech, running as fast as her little legs could carry her and jumping into his arms. I grinned at the sight, allowing myself to pretend that we were a normal family of four, and that a teenage Joey was upstairs sulking in his bedroom, never having disappeared. I was forced back to reality when I heard Edith’s voice. “Daddy, what are all these papers for? Are you doing homework?” “Ah, Edie,” he chuckled, picking her up and letting her sit on his lap, “I guess you can say it’s homework. Homework for grownups. I’ll bet your homework from school is a lot better than this.” “Maybe,” she replied with a giggle. “Ms. Jane is teaching us how to add and subtract numbers. It’s not that hard though.” Benjamin laughed. “Well, I’m sure it’s not hard, especially for a girl as smart as you.” - A few hours had passed, and Edith was now lying asleep on the kitchen floor, her dress-up clothes scattered around her sleeping form. Benjamin and I had taken a few hours to play with Edie, and for that brief time playing with Barbies and dress up clothes, I felt like we were a stable, healthy family. Some of the tension from before had faded away. With the air less thick with anger and unspoken words, the questions started to creep back in. “Ben,” I started, my voice shaky. “What...happened to us?” He stopped writing and set down his pen, the hostility I knew all too well flashing briefly in his eyes before fading away. “Honestly, I don’t know,” he said with a sigh. “I guess, you know...after Joey, it just hit me hard. That’s the kind of thing you hear about and forget because you think it will never happen to you. But then it happened. And I didn’t--still don’t--know how to handle it. And I suppose I took it out on you because you remind me so much of him. The pale skin, the red hair...every time I would look at you I would see his face, in that river or in the back of someone’s van, with a look on his face that terrified me because I knew I wasn’t there when he needed me the most.” I could feel my eyes pricking with tears. “Why didn’t you tell me? I was hurting too, I could have helped you. We could have helped each other. But you didn't want that, did you? You wanted to chase other women and the bottom of a whiskey bottle. That is why you never got to heal. Because you chose to numb and suppress it instead of confronting it. And I never got to heal because in my worst moment, the person who vowed to stay with me through it all wasn’t there!” I was choking back a sob, years of pain bubbling to the surface of a wound that never closed. To my surprise, Benjamin was crying, too, a sight I had never seen--streams of tears rolled down his cheeks and choked sounds erupted from his throat. “I know, and God, I’m so sorry. I loved--still love--you so much, and I wanted to heal and learn to cope with our loss. But I ruined it. I fucked it all up--our marriage, my relationship with my remaining kid, my own mental health. And I don’t think any of it can ever be okay again. And it’s my own damn fault! What am I, besides a deadbeat father and a borderline alcoholic? I’m nothing! And Joey...well, at least he never had to see me like this.” I tried to push back the tears, I did--but the years of pain that I had kept inside for so long were all coming out. How could I have been so blind, to think that Benjamin wasn’t hurting as much or in the same way as I was? He was a parent, too. Joey was as much a part of him as he was a part of me. For a while, we cried together, mourning the loss of our son and what our lives could have been. We both knew that it was over--there was no repairing our marriage, it was in too many pieces for the reconstruction to occur. All there was left to do was to gather them up and use what we could to heal and forgive each other. When I didn’t have anything left within me to cry, I rubbed my hand up and down Benjamin’s back. “You know,” I sniffed, “his class graduated this past weekend. He would be heading off to college, or to the military, or to start his career. What do you think he would be doing?” “Definitely not the military,” he snickered through his last few tears. “He was always too soft and shy for that kind of thing, he wouldn’t survive basic--he would probably be going off to some big campus somewhere to study literature. You know, because he always loved those fantasy books.” “Yeah, or maybe history, because he always wanted to watch those documentaries about medieval Europe, even though they were too mature for him.” The memory came back to me and hit me hard: Ben and I on the couch, Joey wedged between us, begging us to let him watch the History channel. If I had known that three months from then the spot where he always sat would burn with his absence, maybe I would have let him watch. “Do you think him and Edie would have gotten along? Ya’know, if the circumstances were different, if we had planned for two, and they were born only two or three years apart. Edie’s so fiery compared to him, of course she would be the one bossing him around.” He had this kind of bittersweet smile on his face, as if he were reminiscing on a time that had never existed, an alternate reality where, maybe, a different version of us in another universe were living. “She would probably make him play Barbies and dress-up. They would have tea parties together. But then, Edie would want to make it up to him, so they’d go outside and play in the mud together, not that she doesn’t already enjoy that.” The thought brought a smile to my face. Edith still didn’t really understand that she had a brother she never met; there was no good way to tell a child about the disappearance of another. One day we would tell her about Joseph, about the kind of boy he was and how much they would have loved to grow up together. A comfortable silence fell between us. We both found ourselves staring down at the yellow legal pad sitting on our worn kitchen table, our fingertips covered in blue and black ink stains. There was an unspoken question lingering between us: how did we end up here? Both of us were allowing ourselves to imagine the possibility of trying to start over, wondering if we were really broken beyond repair. Maybe somewhere, another version of us was sitting at an old kitchen table, only they were a healthy family of four rather than a broken one of three. Despite our shared desire to try to be that family, or at least some skewed version of it, neither of us were brave enough to voice it. So instead, we picked up our pens again and got back to work, only now each of us had an understanding and respect for the other. It was unspoken, but present nonetheless.

#writing #short story

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