#an izuna with no concept of shame can accomplish anything

[doveywovy]

drabble trade with @domoz :) prompt was "blessed + forbidden technique"

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the trouble with the Blessed was that they tended to be exemplary.

Amaterasu chose brilliant tacticians, gifted fighters- sometimes, they got lucky, and she'd make a talented poet her Blessed. But most often, they were skilled in the Shinobi sense, and it made it damned hard to catch them.

Tobirama had proven the worst of the lot- devastating on the battlefield, and absolutely impossible to capture. The Uchiha had been trying for years with any method conceivable- when it was clear they couldn't best him in battle, they'd take underhanded methods.

Hikaku had discovered the exact farmer who sold the exact leaves to the exact merchant who provided them to the Senju for Tobirama each year, and had managed to drug the leaves at that earliest stage in the process; Tobirama had delayed the reaction long enough with irojutsu to return to Senju lands safely.

Fugaku, the Uchiha with the most successful record of seduction missions in the entire clan, had set about winning Tobirama over as soon as the peace treaty was assigned. He'd plied his trade and simpered and fawned and shown an astounding amount of skin in those early days of peace- all of which Tobirama had completely ignored. Or perhaps simply not noticed, which would've been even more insulting to Fugaku's efforts.

They were getting desperate. Desperate enough that when Izuna, Tobirama's most hated rival, claims he can manage what they've all failed, nobody tries to talk him out of it.

He approaches Tobirama in public. They've been working together for a while now, stiff and uncompromising, but he waits until they're both technically off the clock to try his hand at it.

Izuna slides up next to Tobirama, grabs at his arm, and tilts a teasing little smile upwards. "Ah, Tobirama?" He asks.

Tobirama looks at his grip on his arm like it's a bug he'd like to swat.

"Uchiha." Tobirama says, but he doesn't shake his arm, at least.

"Would you mind if I asked you a favor?" Izuna presses, eyes gone wide and shining. Tobirama wiggles his arm a little to try and break his grip, but says,

"Get on with it."

So Izuna takes a deep breath in, and says,

"PLEASE COME HOME WITH ME."

he shoves his head into Tobirama's shoulder, a playful gesture turned more into a desperate headbutt. His grip on Tobirama's arm has turned squeezing. "PLEASE. PLEASE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE-"

"Stop that!" Tobirama finally shakes his grip, and Izuna slides to his knees and grabs on there instead. "PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE-"

Tobirama's attempts to escape without killing Izuna just result in both of them getting tossed and turned and dirty. Izuna holds on tighter, begs louder, and Tobirama-

"FINE."

Tobirama gives in.

Izuna immediately stops, stands up, and dusts his pants off. He tosses a wink over his shoulder at the crowd, slides an arm around Tobirama's waist, and starts to lead him to the Uchiha compound. "Now, I was thinking the guest room facing the village-"