#amour surcre

[melodyalanaroster]

What Do I Do?

Disclaimer: This is a sequel to Study Session.

Alana opened the door to the Gym and immediately zeroed in on the punching bags. Nathaniel looked at her and smiled. “That was quick.” She set her bag down, walked over to him and hugged him. Nathaniel looked concerned. “What’s wrong?” Alana looked around. “You have the Gym to yourself today?” Nathaniel nodded. “Kim is taking a personal day, so she lent me the key again.” “Good. Because I don’t want any eavesdroppers. I’m still not in a position for outsiders to see me weak.” “Alana, what happened?”

Alana proceeded to tell Nathaniel what had happened with Morgan, and everything that Morgan had told her. Nathaniel looked shocked at the news of what had happened with Rosalaya. Alana looked down. “I was so hell bent on being mad at them for abandoning us. For trying to turn me against you when I got back. For trying to get me to do stuff that I wasn’t comfortable doing. For making everything about them and refusing to listen to me. Now… Now, I just feel selfish.” “There is nothing wrong with you being selfish. You know that, right?” Nathaniel cooed as he held her. “Everyone keeps telling me that, but then, why do I feel guilty for not helping them?” Alana buried her face in his chest. “Because you have always been the helpful type. You always put others first and when you do take time for what you want, you feel guilty because you’re not helping someone else. And now, you’re in a position where you’re being told by all the people you believe have power in your life to take charge and be selfish. The thing is, now, not only is your helpful nature making you feel guilty, but certain people who are so used to you always being there are now having to deal with the fact that you are now only providing your help to those who are there for you.” Alana looked at Nathaniel, shocked. “I forgave Amber! I forgave her and am there for her… Why can’t I do the same for Alexy and Rosalaya?” She asked. “Love, you’ve already answered that question for yourself. Amber came to you, proved to you that she’s changed and grown up and then she apologized for her juvenile actions. Rosalaya and Alexy have committed acts that you cannot forgive. What makes things worse is that, while Leigh has left you alone on the subject, Alexy’s boyfriend has now called you into question.” Nathaniel explained.

Alana sat down on a bench and sighed. “This was not how my final year of college was supposed to be… I was supposed to come back to town, get back with you, finish college, then have us start our real adventure. My reputation is supposed to be so damn fearsome that no one would dare question me or my motives! For fucks’ sake! I spent the better part of the last five years becoming one of the most deadly people on the planet! I come home and Alexy and Rosa just expected me to be the same, sweet, little Alana!” She cried. Nathaniel sat down next to her and wrapped his arms around her. “I can sympathize with them on that… When I first saw you in that Alley with those guys, I couldn’t comprehend that you, you, had become a monster of the Black Tower… That they were afraid of you… And that the fear and respect you command was rightfully earned. I didn’t want to believe it. How could I? The kind, caring, sweet, woman I fell in love with ultimately embracing her dark side and becoming a sadistic, cruel, beast that the monsters of this world fear? It was unheard of.” he explained. “Everyone has a dark side. You know that.” Alana commented. “Still. It was definitely more of a shock to see your transformation. You left to care for your mother, then you went off the grid, then you came back as this. Love, I’m not justifying their actions, but I can see why they can’t wrap their heads around it.” Nathaniel had a point. She hadn’t been as honest with Alex and Rosa as she had been with him, Amber and even Castiel. However, she had stuck with her convictions and decided that they weren’t worth the truth. “I get that it’s a shock for everyone who knew me from before to see that… I never really showed you guys how much I love those cool, long coat wearing, boot stomping, weapon wielding, badasses like in Aeon Flux, Resident Evil and Underworld.” Alana sighed. “No, I knew how much you love them… You showed everyone that by dressing up as Black Widow at that Marvel Exhibition in High School… It just never occurred to me that you would actually turn into one of them.” Nathaniel grinned. “My transformation didn’t shock Viktor and Rini… Then again, they ARE my best friends and have known me the longest….” She commented. “Did they expect it?” Nathaniel asked. “No, but it was a bit easier for them to accept.” She replied. He kissed her forehead. “I can probably guarantee that they had trouble accepting it. They probably talked to your family and had a better support system than the rest of us.”

After a few minutes of Nathaniel holding her, Alana sighed. “I still don’t want to forgive them.” “You don’t have to. Alana, you don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do. You told me that Armin has even stopped trying to get you to talk to his brother, so the fact that Alexy’s boyfriend has done this only proves his naivety.” He cooed. “I’m still upset…. They claimed to be my best friends, and yet they did all this, all while my ACTUAL best friends are genuinely helpful. The only problems that I have with Viktor and Severina are their fathers, and Viktor’s jealousy towards you.” She stated. “Why do you hate their fathers? And why, after all this time, is Viktor still jealous of me?” He asked. Alana went on to explain the events pertaining to the Chevalier incident, her suspicions that Achille Mekina had something to do with inciting it and the fact that Viktor still loves her, despite knowing full well that he will never be with her again. Nathaniel sat there, shocked. “He really waved a gun at you?!” He blurted out, angrily. “Calm down. He didn’t shoot…. As it is, I’m starting to wonder if his mentality was caused my another factor…” She pondered. “What do you mean?” He asked. “It’s a lot of bullshit… Achille has been acting like more of an entitled asshole lately. Viktor and Edgard have been developing a sickness that is quite odd… So, whenever I’ve been visiting Rini, I’ve been investigating her father.” She explained. “You think he’s behind this?” Nathaniel asked. “I think it’s a good possibility.” She replied. “Are you gonna get the organization involved?” He asked. She shook her head. “Only for resources and if I need to wield my power. Other than that, Severina, Verity, Viktor and Edgard will have to deal with him in their own way.” She sighed. “You’re really not going to handle it for them?” He raised an eyebrow. “I want to. Trust me, I do. But you and I both know that if I do everything for them, they won’t learn to take care of themselves. Not to mention how they’ll thank me for doing it, then give me those big “sad eyes” and tell me how I need to save myself and stop saving the world. It’s best to just do as much as I can while I allow myself to rest on that front….” She explained.

After several more minutes of talking, Nathaniel changed into his normal clothes. “Are you making progress with your situation?” Alana asked. “Its slow, but the officer I’m working with is doing everything he can to help me.” He replied. “I hope you know, I’ve already put my backup plan in to place. The Red Death has approved of it, and should anything happen to you, we will take over your situation.” She asserted. He looked at her shocked. “Already?” He asked. “Yes. It wasn’t that hard. It was simply a contingency that could be added to Protocol 216.” She stated. “Are you ever going to tell me what Protocol 216 is?” He asked. “Only after its been implemented. Until then, it’s best if you just know that it involves you, and gives you access to the Black Tower.” She explained. “Alana, why can’t I know now?” He asked. “Because you’re still involved with that cartel. Technically speaking, you’re a loose end. You may be important to me, which makes you important to the organization, but, if the cartel finds out the gravity of that fact before we’re ready for them to know, then it will make things more complicated for all of us… So, its best to wait until you’ve either gotten yourself out of it, or until we take over.” She admitted. “Oh.” He looked down. “Look, love, there are a lot of things that its best if you don’t know for now. As it is, you already have sensitive information inside your head.” She added. “Are you really threatened by them?” Nathaniel asked. “Not really. But, I have to think of every possibility of what could happen. One of those possibilities is that they could use you to get to me. We don’t need that happening.” She replied. Nathaniel looked down, a wave of shame crossing his face. “So, I’m putting you at risk.” He muttered. Alana shook her head. “Don’t think of it like that. There are plenty of things put into place for what happens if people come after me. They typically don’t survive long…” She assured. “Really?” He asked. “You think I got to where I am without making a few enemies? A bunch of people have tried to kill me. They were swiftly dealt with.” She explained.

About an hour of discussion and explanation later, they decided to go out to eat. As they waited for their food, Alana couldn’t help but think about what was going on with Alexy and Rosalaya. Her brain refused to truly leave the matter alone. It was eating away at her. “Nath, I can’t get over it. They were supposed to be my friends… Yet, they abandon me, pour drinks down my throat, negate Lysander and Armin, try to coerce me to be with that waiter from the Cozy Bear, leave you without a support system, and try to turn me against you.” She rambled. “Alana, it is okay if you don’t want to be their friend anymore. The only ones who will judge you will be them, and clearly Alexy’s boyfriend.” Nathaniel took her hand and held it, gently as he spoke. She looked at him and thought for a bit. She knew that he knew what was going through her head… The same thing that she had talked to him at the gym about. She thought to what her other friends had said about the situation. “What cunts! Kick those sad little bitches to the curb! You know who your real friends are!” Derek had boomed. “After all they’ve done and refused to do? Yeah, they’re not your friends.” Lyra had remarked. “Don’t give them the time of day, Mels. They’re not worth it.” Severina had huffed. “They don’t deserve you.” Viktor had shot. Armin was disappointed but not surprised when she had told him of his brother’s conduct. “If you really feel like it’s detrimental that you remain friends with him, then maybe you should cut ties. I can’t deny that they abandoned you.” He had said. Of course, Priya wanted her to give them another chance, and was fully intent on scolding her, until Castiel stopped it. “Do you really expect her forgive them? Do you not remember her telling us that they weren’t talking to her when she was in Toronto? Do you not remember how she was asking us what she did wrong?” He had asked Priya. “I remember. But…” Priya had begun. “No “buts” Priya. This is her choice. If she doesn’t want to forgive them, then we shouldn’t judge her for it.” He had cut her off. Alana knew she was still upset with Castiel for what he had done in his apartment, but she was grateful that he was defending her. Even her mother and sister were disgusted. “If they’re not worth your time, then they’re not worth ours. I hated how Alexy wouldn’t leave Ken’s ass alone anyway.” Sam had remarked. Most everyone she loved and cared about were all saying the same thing. She knew they were right, and that this was her choice. No matter how it made her feel in the short term, she knew it would make her feel better in the long run. Her mind then turned to what had happened at the beach. She remembered the fury she felt as she slapped Rosalaya. The hatred she felt in that moment. It all came rushing back to her in a wave of resentment. Alana looked up at Nathaniel and noticed the plates of food in front of them. “Nath! I’m so sorry!” she blurted out. “It’s fine. It’s a good thing I know what you like… The waitress was worried when I ordered for you.” He smiled. “I love you.” She beamed.

“Do you want me to come with you?” Nathaniel asked as they got up from the table, and dumped their trash. “Yes please, but keep a safe distance. I don’t want them pulling you into something that they should know is my choice.” She replied. “Okay.” He smiled. As they walked towards Leigh’s shop, she explained what she was so focused on at the restaurant. Nathaniel clenched his fists when Castiel’s name came up, but she reassured him that she was still mad at him for what he had been pulling, although, she was happy for his defense. “Priya, always so self righteous.” He commented. “It’s okay. She’s easy to handle.” She sighed. He laughed when she brought up what her family had said. “I knew Sam didn’t like what Alexy was pulling, but I didn’t know she hated it to this extent!” he chuckled. “Yeah, even mom is upset with them.” She replied. When they got to Leigh’s shop, the sign was turned to “CLOSED” and they noticed that Leigh, Rosalaya, Alexy, Morgan and Rayan were talking casually. “Was not expecting this level of audience.” Alana muttered. “You can do this.” Nathaniel whispered in her ear.

“I’m sorry, but the shop is closed.” Leigh called as the door opened. “I’d say I’m sorry for barging in, Leigh, but that would be a lie. This is important and needs to be taken care of immediately.” Alana announced as she walked up to them. Nathaniel leaned against the doorway. Morgan looked at her and smiled, hopefully. “You might wanna go ahead and wipe that smile off of your face.” She shot at him. “Alana? What’s the meaning of this?” Rayan asked. “I see you’ve had time to think about what we discussed.” Morgan commented. Alexy and Rosalaya looked at her, a flicker of hope flashing over them. Alana stood firm in a position facing Alexy and Rosalaya. She looked at them solemnly. “What I am about to begin saying is a monologue, not a dialogue. So, no one will speak until I am done. Is that clear?” She started. “But, Alana…” Alexy began. “I SAID, IS THAT CLEAR?!” Her voice boomed. “Crystal.” Rosalaya began to shake. Alexy nodded. “I was not expecting a lecture and pleas for me to forgive you from Morgan. Perhaps my perception has deteriorated a bit since my return. I thought that, when he asked me to study, the conversation would be a lot more simplistic. Go figure, someone who is connected to you that actually asks for my attention wants me to do something for you. At least Armin and Leigh have gotten the hints. Then again, they know the biggest reasons why you two are recipients of my ire. They may not like it, but they understand it. Hell, even Lysander understands it. The past few months, I’ve wracked my brain over this situation. I begged and pleaded for your attention when mom and I were in Toronto. I contacted Leigh and Armin, asking them what I did wrong to make you two stop talking to me and they came up empty handed. I called, texted, tried to video chat, and got nothing. I even asked Lysander, Castiel, and Priya and they came up short. I had just lost Sylvester, I was in a constant state of fear of losing my mom, I had pressure from mom’s doctors and Carol, and I was alone in a foreign country half way around the world. Yes, I had everyone else, but I wanted to talk to you two. And what did you do? You abandoned me. You know? At least Castiel did his damnedest to try to keep up with me when mom had to relay information between the rest of the world and me. At least Lysander knew I still cared when I had the family get flowers and food to his and Leigh’s parents’ funeral. Sure, I couldn’t be there, but I did my best to make sure they knew I was there for them in some way. What did you two do? Essentially, you acted as if I had already died and you forgot about me… That is, until I returned. When it was made known that I was coming back here, you two popped up and acted like nothing had changed… Despite everything having changed. I get home and you two started pouring drinks down my throat, trying to set me up with Hyun, wanted me to get in on your crazy schemes and let me know that you completely disregarded the ONE THING that I had asked you to do when I first left! You not only abandoned me, you turned your backs on Nathaniel! Then you had the AUDACITY to try to turn me against him! You told me “he’s dangerous”, and to not worry about him. Even AFTER I told you that he’s a primary reason why I even came back in the first place! I made it very clear that I am one of the most dangerous things in this world, and you two still treated me like I’m some frail little princess. I KNOW what Nathaniel is a part of! And trust me, it wouldn’t take much for me to extinguish it! Literally, just a handful of orders! I thought I was done with this decision when I bitch slapped Rosalaya at the beach… But, apparently not. Between Morgan judging me and trying to guilt trip me into reconciling with you two, and my own brain trying to get to me, it’s eaten me alive. However, every time I talk to someone about it, they all say the same thing… That I don’t have to be friends with you two. Almost everyone else I care about agrees that you’ve been shit excuses for friends and that what you’ve done shouldn’t be forgiven. And it’s been solidified in my head and heart that I agree with that. You don’t deserve my forgiveness, and you sure as hell don’t deserve my friendship. After this, there will be no more confusion. You two are not my friends anymore.” Alana spoke with absolute conviction.

Alexy, Rosalaya, and Morgan looked at Alana, shocked. Rayan looked a bit surprised and Leigh looked disappointed but not surprised. “Alana! We’re supposed to be friends!” Alexy bleated. Anger flashed over Alana’s face. “That’s right! We’re SUPPOSED to be friends! But, when I was doing everything in my power to reach out when I was at my weakest points, you two turned your backs on me! When I was crying out and trying to get to you, you ignored me! When I came home, you rejected my requests and treated me like a pawn! THAT IS NOT HOW FRIENDS ACT!” She boomed. “But Alana we…” Rosalaya started. Alana turned to Rosalaya. “Don’t get me started on YOU! You go around acting like you’re everyone’s “mommy” all the time, telling them what to do with their lives, yet the only thing you’ve ever truly done to get what you have is be with Leigh all this time… And guess what? Did you forget that, not long after I enrolled in Sweet Amoris, you begged me to help you with him because you two were on the rocks? Yes, I feel sorry for the reason why you were in the hospital recently. I would only wish that on someone as a mercy for the innocent child who shouldn’t have to put up with shit parents. But that’s no excuse for how you’ve acted! You know what I’ve done to get everything I have? I’ve bled, sweated, cried, nearly died multiple times and have worked extremely hard. I have put in the effort! Hell, I’m still putting in the effort to get what I want! I train, go to therapy, work on documents and my “peacetime job”, try to hang out with friends, work on my connections, go to school, and give Nathaniel my attention. I MAKE AN EFFORT! Hell, I even make sure to keep in contact with Lysander and Armin! Which is more than what either of you do!” Alana cut Rosalaya off. “Then why did you ask me about Lysander when you got back?” Rosalaya asked. “We all know he’d lose his own head if it wasn’t attached. He hadn’t responded to my letters and texts in a couple of weeks and I figured that, since you’re gonna be his sister-in-law, you’d know something. But, no! You only ever told me to “forget about him”! Wow, you must REALLY love Leigh if you’re willing to disregard his little brother like that! The guy got into a car accident, got temporary amnesia, lost his parents, and took over his family’s farm and you just go out and tell people to forget about him? Then again, that’s how you are. You claim to be this “kind, sensible, compassionate, woman”, but in all actuality, you’re none of those things… You act that way to the outside world, but its easy to tell that you’re only, truly, like that to Leigh. What makes this even sadder is that, when I first knew you, you really were a “kind, sensible, compassionate, woman”. You were more mature than me at the time. You really were the “mom” of the group. But, between then and now, something has turned off. You’re more preachy, more hypocritical, more insufferable.” She then turned to Morgan. “You say that I’m a “good person”, but what you haven’t really gotten through your thick skull is that even good people have their limits. Please, take what I told you in your dorm to heart.” She sighed.

As she began to walk away, both Alexy and Rosalaya stepped forward. “Alana, please don’t do this.” Alexy’s voice cracked. “Please.” Rosalaya pleaded as she reached for Alana’s hand. “I judged people guilty and watched Derek execute them for much greater crimes who have pleaded for forgiveness much more convincingly than you. They offered me money, power, and other items in an effort to save their own skin. I have watched them bleed, sweat and cry as they even began to ask their gods for forgiveness and to be spared. Your lives may not be on the line, but you are still not begging me to forgive you in any way that sounds like you’re remotely sorry for what you’ve done. You show no remorse. And that makes this much easier… I will never forgive you. I will never be your friend again. Your existence in my life these past few months is a stain that only time will wash out.” Alana jerked away and looked at them, angrily. Alexy and Rosalaya stood back, their hands still slightly reaching out. Alana turned away and walked towards the door. “Let’s go Nathaniel, we’re done here.”

As the shop doors closed behind them, Alana felt a wave of relief wash over her. “You really shouldn’t have done that.” her subconscious tried to tell her. She looked at Nathaniel. “I did the right thing.” She stated. “How do you feel?” He asked. “Do you remember how, when I found you on the stairs at the beach, I said that I had performed “small surgery”? Well, this feels like I just cut out two tumors out of me. And, honestly, even though part of my subconscious is upset that I did that, I feel like a massive weight has been lifted off of me.” She explained. “I never thought I’d see the day where you’d do this.” He sighed. She looked at him and sighed. “There’s a lot of things I’ve done and am doing that you never thought you’d see. But here’s the thing… For years, everyone has made expectations for what I should do, how I should act, and who I keep in contact with… At this point, I’m ready to throw those expectations out the window. I need to. Not doing so will be detrimental to me. I need to start doing what I want, when I want, and with who I want. While I have been working towards that for nearly a year now, I’m not to where I need to be. Formally cutting ties with Alexy and Rosalaya is a big step in the right direction.”

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I was actually quite torn about writing this one... I was torn simply between having her go to the Gym and confide in Nathaniel or go to the Break Room and having her confide in Rayan. But, as Nathaniel is one of the only people outside the Tower that she is the most open with, I thought it would be best to have her talk to her one true love.

This also closes the door that is opened in Study Session. I was going to give Alexy and Rosalaya a chance to reenter Alana’s life, but then I decided that it would be better for her to completely shut that down.

Timeline wise, I’ve decided that this takes place in between Episode 10 and Episode 14. I know, this is a lot of dialogue and little actual action.... But, I had a lot to cover here. 

[melodyalanaroster]

So, within just a couple of days, we got a couple of previews for Episode 16 involving Nathaniel... 

I’m sure that now, we’re fully in his arc. Either way, all of the love interests will end up knowing about him being stabbed....

We know he’s gonna pull through. Beemoov may be heartless, but killing him wold be soulless....

And now, we know that he ends up in the hospital...

I’m pretty sure the new episode will be out on 09/04/19...

These were taken from Beemoov’s Instagram and the MCL official page.

[melodyalanaroster]

From Beemoov's Instagram

I really hope they wait until Wednesday to start the event. I'll be able to play it after work.

[melodyalanaroster]

Tagged by @colombia-chan! Thanks!

I’m gonna do this with my anime crushes... While I do stick to the “Big Three” there are several....

Nathaniel Jacott... You all should have expected this.

Alucard from Hellsing.

Haji from Blood+

Finral Roulacase from Black Clover

Qrow Branwen from RWBY

Mamoru Chiba/Darien/Tuxedo Mask/Prince Endymion/King Endymion from Sailor Moon

Kyoya Ootori from Ouran High School Host Club

Stein from Soul Eater

Katsuki Bakugou from My Hero Academia

Wow this is an interesting list! ^_^

I tag @vanillaamoursucrethings @sakurina-mcl @mycandydrama @faerietale-mcl

[melodyalanaroster]

WE NOW HAVE A COUNTDOWN!

Even though I have tomorrow off from work, I won’t be playing the new episode until tomorrow afternoon.

[melodyalanaroster]

So, it turns out Episode 14 will be coming out next week....

Amber is gonna be dealing with cyber bullying... Honestly, I’m glad we’re seeing more of her. I really hope this plays well in to Nath’s story line.

Also, what’s with the new summer sprites for the Love Interests? Is it for a new event? Are we getting another Beach episode? That would be kind of interesting if we got beach episodes for episodes 7 and 14...

I just hate that they’re doing this to us right after that awful event.

[melodyalanaroster]

I’m Am No Angel.

“You are so Aziraphale! And I can prove it!” Alana laughed as she and Nathaniel walked through the apartment. “Oh, really? How am I him?” He asked as he set his bag of clothes on the ottoman at the foot of Alana’s bed. She looked at the package that Nora had given her before they got up to the apartment then turned to him. “Alright then... Would you come up and make some trouble? Or would you give them your flaming sword?” “I’d give them my flaming sword.” “Knight of the Round Table or Black Knight?” “You know peace is better.” “Alright, big question... Bookshop or Bentley.” “You know I’d choose the bookshop.” “My point exactly.” “Oh? And does that make you Crowley?” “Obviously. I’d come up here to make some trouble, happily be the Black Knight and I’d have that Bentley in a heartbeat...” “You’re no demon.” “Technically... Neither was Crowley. He just sauntered vaguely downward and asked questions...” Nathaniel smiled and sighed. “You would do that.” “Yep!” Alana winked as she walked into the closet and opened up the package.

“WHAT THE HELL?! NORA!” Alana yelled as she looked in the mirror at the dress that Nora had given her. “Alana! What’s wrong?” Nathaniel called. “I’m wearing a damn napkin!” She choked as she walked in the room. Nathaniel looked her over, a smirk appearing on his face. “Well, now you look tempting.” Alana blushed. “You know I don’t wear stuff this revealing.” “I know. But, it is something different.” “And Nora did give it to me under the impression that I’d look good in it.” “Which you do. Very good, if I might add.” “Oh? Are you sure you don’t just want to stay here?” She mused. “As much as I’d love to, I’m actually looking forward to this.” Nathaniel growled as he began to take the clothes from his bag and undress. Alana quickly grabbed a pair of black pumps and slipped them on all while doing her best to watch Nathaniel. The only man she has ever loved was disrobing in her bedroom. A flicker of desire snaked it’s way through her body and left a wanting taste on her tongue. Within a couple of minutes, he was almost completely naked, as he began pulling his pants along his legs and around his hips. Each passing second, she was burning the image of him into her memory, just as she had years ago when she had seen him the first time. Only this time, his body had been carved into the image of a wet dream. When he turned around to grab his shirt, she could see the marks on his back. “Nath...” He slipped the shirt onto his arms and began to button it. “Don’t worry Alana. They’re from training.” He grinned. “I know, I just don’t like seeing you hurt...” She smiled as she slipped her bangles on her wrists, put her earrings on and walked over to him. “I know, but, tonight isn’t the night to think about that. He smiled as he held out his arm. She quickly grabbed her phone and slipped it into her bra. “Let’s go Angel.” she beamed.

As they walked out of the lobby to the Black Tower, people kept looking at her. “I KNEW SHE’D LOOK GREAT IN THAT!” Nora called as she walked down the hall with Lyra. “Damn! Lady Melody is a bombshell!” A few recruits could be heard talking from a hallway across the lobby. “You are absolutely stunning.” Nathaniel cooed as they walked to the Cozy Bear Cafe.

The party was already under way when they arrived. Priya was doing the salsa with Chani and the song was winding down. “Woah! I never expected this from them!” Alana cheered as everyone else clapped. “I’m gonna get us drinks” Nathaniel stated as he began to walk away. Suddenly, the music changed from Salsa to an elegant tango and Nathaniel stopped in his tracks. “On second thought, the drinks can wait. This song is perfect.” He smirked as he quickly walked back over to Alana and took her in his arms.

Before Alana could even wrap her mind around what was happening, they were already on the dance floor. His eyes remained locked on hers, his smile radiating pure desire, his moves more suave than anything she had ever imagined him being. This act of passion caught her so off guard that the only thing she could do was rely on her training and keep up with his body as she lost herself in him. His hands moved throughout her figure with such intensity that each and every millimeter that he touched felt as if he was committing acts of arson. She wanted to sin... In every possible carnal way that sin could be committed. Her heart was racing, mouth watering, and her core was burning with the ferocity of hellfire. They flowed across the dance floor like two celestial beings who had forgotten that they were in the presence of humans and were no longer touching the ground. She wanted to tell him how much she loved him, how much she needed him, but with each turn and dip, the words wouldn’t dare pass her lips.

When the song ended, Nathaniel kissed her passionately and held her as close as possible. “When did you learn how to tango?” She asked. “I’m full of surprises.” He smirked. “But, Nath... The last time...” She began. He kissed her again, flicking his tongue across hers. A growl erupted from his throat, a devilish grin appeared on his face, and his eyes narrowed. “I am no angel.”

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06/24/19

I have been meaning to write something for Alana’s Canon for weeks.... But, I haven’t had any inspiration to do so. I’ve recently become enamored with the Amazon Prime show, Good Omens and have begun reading the book... So, I showed that, and combined it with the International Music Day event. I know it’s relatively short compared to other parts of Alana’s Canon... But I didn’t think it should go too far beyond the dance.

[melodyalanaroster]

They’re Ineffable.

For those of you who don’t know, in Good Omens, the term “Ineffable” comes up in primary points in the book and show.

I realized that the Handsome Suit is perfect for both Aziraphale and Crowley...  I made Aziraphale hold a bag because of the Church scene in Episode 3.

[melodyalanaroster]

Study Session

Alana crossed the Anteros grounds and made her way to the dormitory. As she entered the building and walked the halls, she couldn’t help but think about the last time she had spoken to Alexy. Her anger had boiled over and she told him and Rosalaya that she was cutting them off. They looked so pitiful when she walked away... Even going so far as to send her a barrage of messages in a futile effort to get her attention. But, she had other things to worry about. They had greatly disrespected her and the one she loved most on multiple occasions, so, she was done. Of course, when she told Armin about it, he wasn’t too happy. He begged her to be more forgiving to his brother, but she reminded him of what had happened and told him she couldn’t handle it anymore. After a while, Armin stopped talking about his twin, and focused on the games they played. She hadn’t spoken to Alexy or Rosalaya since then. She told Priya and Castiel not to bring them up around her, she even avoided Leigh... Despite seeing him depressed as she passed him on the street one day...

So, when Morgan invited her over to his dorm for a study session, she was a little caught off guard....

It only took one knock on the door before Morgan opened it. “Hey Alana.” He smiled. “Hey Morgan. Thanks for inviting me.” She greeted as she stepped into the dorm and set her backpack down. “I’m surprised you took me up on my offer...” Morgan admitted as he and Alana took seats at his desk and pulled out their notebooks. “I know it’s a little unorthodox to not cut you off if I’m cutting Alexy out... But, you’re an innocent party in all of this... So, you don’t deserve punishment...” Morgan looked down. “About Alexy... He’s been really upset. First he lost you, then Rosalaya.” Alana looked confused. “What do you mean “then Rosalaya”?”

Morgan began explaining what he knew had happened between Alexy and Rosalaya. The miscarriage, the fight, the separation, and Alexy’s spiral into depression. Alana looked down. “I didn’t know. I saw Leigh a while ago, he looked completely distraught... I’m sorry that that happened... I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy...” Morgan looked at her. “Listen, I don’t know your full reasoning behind cutting them out, but I do know that they need you...” Alana clenched her fists. “But why? Why should I? I come home and make what I’ve become plain as day and they immediately jump on me. They stopped talking to me before I joined the R.D.R. I needed them to talk to while mom was in the hospital and they weren’t there. They abandoned me! Then, when I did come back, they made it very clear that they disregarded the one thing I asked them to do while I was gone! They tossed Nathaniel aside like he was garbage, despite knowing what he had gone through... They were so adamant about getting me with Hyun, even though they knew I only want to be with Nath... And don’t get me started on how they were trying to pour drinks down my throat... I’ve needed help! I’ve needed them to be my friends, and they couldn’t be bothered to do that. So... Tell me Morgan... Why? Why should I help them now?” Morgan thought for a few minutes as he looked down at his notes. “Because you’re a good person.”

Alana looked at him for a while. She didn’t know what to think. She knew they were both right. “Morgan, you say I’m a good person... A lot of people say that. But, I have friends who have been there for me for most of our lives, despite us all being apart. Viktor and Severina have been my best friends since Pre-K. We’ve been through thick and thin. They know what’s going on in my life and I know what’s going on in theirs. Both of them have made a great point to me... That point being that I’ve been trying to save the world for most of my life and that for once, I need to save myself. I’ve been constantly sacrificing myself for the well being of others. I’ve done it for them, Alexy, Rosalaya, Castiel, Nathaniel, Armin, Lysander, my mom, and for innocent people who I didn’t know until I was getting them to safety... Hell, I’m still doing that for Nath... But here’s the difference... The people I keep around know that my help goes both ways. Viktor, Severina, Armin, Lysander, Priya, Chani and Castiel all listen to me. They give me reasons to care about them... And because of that, I want to be there for them. Nathaniel is the love of my life. He has saved me so many times that its difficult to count them... In big ways and in small. Hell, even my high school bully, Amber, has become someone I care about because of how she treats me. All Alexy and Rosalaya have done since I got back is take. They never once lent me their ears. They didn’t give me a chance to talk to them and try to catch up. No... Instead, it was “Let’s party! Let’s get Alexy a boyfriend! Then let’s get you into a relationship! Go Team Hyun! Forget Nathaniel, he’s trash! Get yourself someone better! I’m Pregnant!”... I can’t do it anymore... I’m supposed to be finding a sense of “normalcy”... But, instead, I’m watching over Lyra’s and Nora’s training, I’m helping my boyfriend and his sister with their problems, I’m getting hit with an avalanche of questions from my mom’s fans, I have a fearsome reputation to uphold around the Black Tower, the Prime Minister wants me to go to Parliament and give my input as to how this country should be run, I have several big events to organize, as well as my “peace time job” to focus on. My time here is supposed to be the beginning of an ultimate act of self care... And I’m still getting ripped to shreds. Something had to give, so I cut them.” Morgan looked at her, shocked. “Alana... I’m so sorry. I had no idea...” “ That’s why I’m explaining it to you. I know you weren’t around for all the big stuff. I know you don’t know what I’m dealing with. Hell, very few people outside the Tower do. You think I don’t want to be there for them? I do. They were two of my best friends. It hurt to cut them off like that... Regardless of how easy it looked to the rest of the world... It hurt like a bitch to do it.”

Alana grabbed her water bottle out of her backpack, opened it and took a swig. “For fuck’s sake, I’m twenty three years old. I’m supposed to be going out with friends and having fun. That’s one reason why my apartment is so big and cool because it was built for me to entertain. But, no, instead, I’m doing my damnedest to stay away from the Black Tower and am spending most of my time either preparing for life after graduation, doing anything that classifies as a “Fuck You” to Azrael, or sitting around alone...” Morgan looked puzzled. “But what about that party in Yeleen’s dorm?” Alana put her water bottle back in her backpack. “I had barely just gotten back and it was one of Rosalaya’s wild schemes. It sounded like a great change of pace for me. The party itself was rather fun... I just had much more of a one track mind then than I do now...” Morgan raised an eyebrow. “From what I can tell, you’ve never had a one track mind. Even when we first met, I could tell that you try to be everywhere at once. You tried to help everyone around you be happy. That’s one reason why I like you. You do your best to be kind. Which is why it shocked me to see you cut Alexy and Rosalaya off like that.” Alana looked down and sighed. “After everything I’ve gone through... Everything I’m going through... Something had to give. I mean, for heaven’s sake, Alexy’s become a “Fair Weather Friend”. He’s either focused on himself, or focused on you. He only came to me whenever he needed or wanted something. No “fun shopping trips”, no “casual times at the cafe”, no walks in the park just chatting about random things... The last time he and I talked, he wouldn’t let me get a word in edgewise!” Morgan looked annoyed for a second. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Nathaniel lately. Do you spend much time with your other friends? Other than the ones you have inside the Tower? Because, if you don’t, that makes you one hell of a hypocrite.” Alana raised an eyebrow. “I play Overwatch with Armin at least once a week. The reason why I’m not spending much time with Castiel right now is because he keeps hitting on me. I’ve been TRYING to hang out with Priya more, but she’s had a lot of group projects lately. I hang out with Chani outside of class at least once a week... Hell, just recently, we marathoned Good Omens. I try to write to Lysander at least once a week, if not once a month... I even try to see Amber at least once a week, but as she’s an upcoming model, her schedules are more erratic than mine. As for Viktor and Severina? We text and video chat all the time. They’re the CEO and CFO of a multinational, multi-billion gold, tech company, so I can’t see them in person all the time, but we have plans to hang out when Detective Pikachu comes out and we’re talking about going on a trip after I graduate. Oh, and about my friends inside the Tower, I make damn sure to spend time with them that isn’t training. Is that enough proof for you?”

Morgan looked down at his notes and sighed. Alana closed her notebook and put it in her bag. “So, for Alexy and Rosalaya to get back in your good graces, they need to make an effort to have you in their lives? Despite the fact that they’re both severely depressed and don’t have many people to turn to? If they abandoned you when you needed them, wouldn’t you be more inclined to help them now?” Alana’s eyes flashed with annoyance. “You know what Nathaniel and Castiel do when they can’t reach me? They go to the Black Tower and make damn sure I know they’re there. And if I’m not there, they fucking find me. You know what Alexy and Rosalaya have done to try to get my attention? They’ve attempted to text me. I’ve passed Alexy several times on campus, and he has NEVER tried to walk up to me! NEVER! If they really needed and wanted me back in their lives, they would storm the place like everyone else does!” Alana stood up. “Even when I was at my lowest, I still tried to reach out. I called people, I video chatted, I wrote letters, I did SOMETHING. Now, if they make it to where I can’t ignore them, then I will be forced to face them. But, I’m tired of being the only one to truly make any moves.”

Alana grabbed her bag and began walking towards the door. “Alana, wait.” Morgan called. Alana shook her head. “I think I’m done studying for the day. It’s a blow off class for me as it is. Again, thanks for inviting me over. Have a good day.” She sighed as she left the dorm.

As she left the dorm rooms, her mind ran over what had just happened. The significant other of one of her ex best friends invited her over to their dorm to study for a class that everyone knew she didn’t need to study for. He then told her that Rosalaya had had a miscarriage, which is why she was trying to talk to her and why Leigh were so depressed and the Clothes Shop had been closed. Alexy innocently brought up adoption to Rosalaya, which caused her to lash out, which resulted in an argument so bad that they cut each other off. “I’m sure he was trying to be helpful, but from what Morgan said, Alexy did it the day she lost the baby. Which was a really stupid move.” She muttered as she entered the Quad. She then thought about what Morgan had just tried to do. He had tried to convince her to talk to Alexy, despite knowing that she had cut him off. She knew that he was probably thinking about how much of a selfish wretch she was at that very moment, and she was wondering if he’d be right. Alana reached into her pocket, pulled out her earbuds, put them in her ears, flipped through the music on her phone, picked a good song and began walking off campus.

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Honestly, this was overdue. I’ve needed to address the fact that Alana doesn’t talk to or see Alexy and Rosalaya for a while. I know this one is mostly dialogue, but it was necessary for Alana’s Canon. Yes, this presents an entryway for Alexy to get back into Alana’s life. There will be a sequel to this. I just have to write it.

[melodyalanaroster]

MCL’s Facebook: 05/01/19

Personally, I don’t know... I turned him down and went to Nathaniel, so, I don’t know what’s gonna happen with Cas from here on out.

[melodyalanaroster]

                            ☾ ☾ ☾ Happy Birthday To Me! ☾ ☾ ☾

That’s right ladies and gentlemen, I am now 24 years old!

I figured it would be nice to make a comparison between Alana and Nathaniel and Cody and Me.... I edited a sprite that Unnieverso made of Kentin into a sprite of my IRL boyfriend, Cody. I tried to make a sprite that’s as close to the real me as possible. My hair is actually down to just under my shoulder blades IRL, but this is close enough.

I chose Hellsing shirts for Alana and me this time because Cody gave me Hellsing Ultimate on Blu-Ray for my birthday and I’m marathoning all 10 episodes of it.

Actually... My presents include:

Hellsing Ultimate on Blu Ray and a figure of Dartrix from Cody

A chocolate Harry Potter wand from Cody’s mom

A Periodic Table of Marvel Characters shirt and Marvel curtains from My mom

As for what I’ve gotten myself? Because every year that I’ve had a job, I’ve gotten myself something neat....

I’ve gotten myself: Hatsune Miku Project Mirai XD for the 3DS, a Sailor Moon shirt, a Super Saiyan Vegeta FigPin, a Bulma FUNKO Pop, and a Kingdom Hearts umbrella.

I celebrated with friends yesterday. We all went to the local coffee shop and played Cards Against Humanity.... I really got the feeling of the fact that I’m the social butterfly of the group... Despite the fact that I genuinely hate society... It was all good fun.

[melodyalanaroster]

The countdown is up!

[melodyalanaroster]

I decided to edit Alana in the dress....

And, as my dress is incomplete (because of a glitch in the game), I decided to put my Candy in an 11th Doctor outfit... I’m just missing the Fez and screwdriver, but I think it’s nice. I know, I have a soft spot for the bottom to the Valentine’s Day outfit... But I hate short dresses and it is a really nice skirt....

[melodyalanaroster]

Alana in lingerie for Sin Week

Between work (which is absolute hell), Independence Day celebrations (i.e. a date with my IRL darling), and the new episode coming out this week (which, you all know I will devote a good chunk of time to), I may not be able to properly participate in Sin Week. I want to.... I even have a banner made for it.... But, I may not be able to take part... So, here’s an updated version of Alana in her lingerie... And, like most of us, I’m hoping we get some sexy time with Nathaniel really soon....

[melodyalanaroster]

Melody Alana Roster

Because I have many shirts that I’ve made for her over the time that I’ve been making clothes for her, I went with an old stand by for her “Normal” outfit. When in doubt, wear Deadpool or Doctor Who... 

Her PJ’s typically consist of a shirt and short shorts... I’d like to one day make a My Hero Academia shirt to wear to bed...

In her Canon, she does NOT work at the cafe! She is a high ranking operative who lives in the penthouse apartment of the Black Tower (a skyscraper I’ve dropped into the City). I could have changed the Cafe apron to something that suited her because she is trying to get to a point where she won’t have to entirely rely on her organization by becoming a prop maker to make money... But I didn’t want to do that this time...

As for her Gym Wear, I put her Training Attire. This is what she wears in the Black Tower’s Arena to train...

Credit to @luxxesitacdm for the card!

[melodyalanaroster]

So, I modified a character sprite that Unnieverso on DeviantArt made of Kentin into one of my IRL boyfriend. I edited the clothes, necklace and eyes.

If you’d like to use their versions of Kentin in pics, please give them credit. And here’s the link to the Pack.