#am i sorry for “offending” you as a faux ally? fuck no lol

[humanitys-strongest-bamf]

listen i'm really sorry that you are being targeted for your weight. you are right! bmi is bm-bullshit. in the friendliest way, though, your last post is giving racist. "very chinese"? i'm not sure what you mean, or if you are actually chinese and feel you have the right to say that. if that's the case, i can sort of understand.

just wanted to kindly let you know that the way it appeared to me... it didn't read great. i doubt you intended it to sound that way, which is why i thought i should let you know how it came across.

Oh nooo I’m so sorry, I should have clarified!!! Yes I am Chinese lol, I’ll prob delete just so others don’t get the same vibe because I’m too autistic to tell what communities I should and should not make these comments to lakdkskfkskfj

tldr; I am Chinese with parents and in-laws from mainland China that I challenge on these topics, considering ethnocentricity and how social justice can be intricate in that context, husband and I follow content creators (x and x) that embrace our stereotypes through comedy, I’m a dumbass and didn’t realize that it wouldn’t translate well onto a text-only blog where my face and background is not apparent, this is actually a very micro aggressive ask and triggered me a lot so i ranted at the end and you can read at your own risk

To explain, this is a personal gripe that my husband and I have a lot with traditional Asian cultures in that sizeism isn’t really recognized and we challenge both my parents and his parents on those worldviews to limited degrees of success. Both his parents and my parents are from mainland China and while my parents have been in the US for a while, his haven’t (he’s an international student), although they are much more willing to listen to me when I challenge them

On the other hand there’s the whole thing about not forcing Western views onto non-Western cultures, which is why this is a delicate balance to walk and I rarely bring it up to them directly because I don’t wanna seem like I’m shitting on them too much, but I’ve been trying to push it a bit more recently because he’s struggling with a lot of body dysphoria and I’m trying to nip it in the bud

Anyway, I’ll prob delete the post and I’m so sorry it came off that way!!! My husband and I and our lil Chinese community joke a lot about our own stereotypes a lot (see Steven He and Uncle Roger for more well-known examples), and I completely forgot that it won’t seem that way to people outside of the community or on the internet where race/ethnicity isn’t as apparent. 🥹

EDIT: okay y’know what, I’m gonna be a bitch for a second and just lyk that approaching it in this way is incredibly rude and condescending and I can kinda get it because you didn’t know I was Chinese, but I am incredibly triggered right now so I’m gonna rant and ramble in that this message, even if it’s “nice”, is incredibly self-righteous and all of this could have been avoided had you just DM’d me or even said “yo that post might not sit well with people jlyk”

and I get it. Not everyone knows about how those type of callouts can be harmful, but to say that I’m not allowed to talk about my own community in a way that IS used as a valid form of coping just pisses me the fuck off and is triggering all the invalidation issues. I'd like to clarify that this ask itself is not what is racist and triggering but your comment as an outsider about how i "might" think i have the right to say that is very much gaslighting-type behavior because y'know what, I DO have a right and i can't really get myself to care about you understanding why i have that right. google exists. chatgpt exists. do your research.

Just like how cishet folks will never know what it’s like to be queer, or how people that aren’t BIPOC will never know what it’s like to be BIPOC, *my* experience as a obviously Chinese person in a very white society that is literally trying to exile us due to a virus that isn’t even our fault is not something that any outsider can ever truly understand. So yes, taking my voice away is furthering that oppression and I encourage you to educate yourself.