#alzsheimers

[freerangechuck]

Tag-team #15

To successfully handle my father, my brother and I have to tag-team him.  Alone, neither of us would survive this journey through Alzheimer's.  Together, we can manage my dad's diagnosis and still stay sane.

My brother came up with a 'spit-ball' list.  What is this?  Spit ball means my brother is throwing out ideas to see if I agree and the ideas stick to the wall; if the idea has merit, then it will be transferred to the 'must-do' Chuck list.  For example, my mother, who is deceased, is still on most of my dad's accounts, the house, car etc etc etc.  Chuck has not had the energy or drive to remove her from anything; this way he does not have to deal with her loss as finite.  Her ashes sat on a table in the sun (because my dad said she liked it there) for about 8 years.   We tag-teamed my dad that it was finally time to bury her, and it was accomplished. So, now it is time to remove my mom from all his paperwork, and this became one of our top 'spit-ball' items.  The 'spit-ball' list is almost two full pages long and exhausting to think about.  

But, by tag teaming Chuck, we can actually handle the crazy.  By sharing the load and responsibility, it serves to help my brother and I from becoming angry and bitter with my poor dad.   We can actually email, text, phone call, or in-person share 'Chuck' stories that helps release the venom and create much needed levity.  

Some days Dad actually figures out we are tag-teaming him and he gets Chuck-mad; that is not actually angry but crotchety and annoyed with us.  "I don't like it when you and your brother 'beat me up.'  I have survived 80 years without your help; I am just fine."  So there!  

He usually remembers to be angry with us for about 12-24 hours, then the memory wipe happens and it is all sunshine and rainbows in Chuck-World again.

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