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per-ineptia-ad-astra · 5 years ago

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Star Trek Gold Key #30: Death Of A Star

Our story begins with an old woman doing something mysterious, which on its own wouldn’t be terribly foreboding, but of course, we can’t possibly start a Gold Key comic with anything less than imminent danger lest the readers feel they haven’t gotten their money’s worth, so she’s also about to explode. Or so Kirk tells us, anyway. How he came to this conclusion I’m not sure.

[ID: A comic splash page titled STAR TREK: DEATH OF A STAR PART 1. A narration box at the top reads, “Trapped on a veritable keg of cosmic dynamite, Captain Kirk and the Star Trek crew become an unwilling captive audience to the most shattering spectacle in all the galaxy: a star going nova! But the natural cataclysm takes on tragic overtones when a mysterious old woman’s life is mystically linked to...a strange cosmic force!” In the foreground Kirk and Chapel are holding their arms out, facing away from the camera and looking toward Spock and an old woman wearing orange and yellow robes, who is touching Spock’s forehead; swirls of red and yellow are spiraling away from the old woman. Chapel is saying, “Captain! What is happening to her?” Kirk is saying, “I’m not sure, Nurse, but I think she is going to explode!”]

Kudos to the narration box up there for its use of the excellent term “a veritable keg of cosmic dynamite” although “But the natural cataclysm takes on tragic overtones when a mysterious old woman’s life is mystically linked to a strange cosmic force!” sounds like a sentence that someone started out saying without knowing quite how it was going to end.

So, what’s the Enterprise crew done now that’s somehow resulted in an old woman spontaneously combusting? It begins, as usual, with a captain’s log. “Our mission,” Kirk tells us, “is to study and record, from a safe distance, the final death throe of the star Isis. According to our calculations, this gem of space has only 48 hours before it explodes, destroying everything for billions upon billions of cubic miles. Fortunately, its solar system is uninhabited!”

So a star is due to go supernova and they’re going to park somewhere at a safe distance and watch the fireworks. Cool. How close is a safe distance? At least billions upon billions of cubic miles away, apparently, since, sure, we definitely measure astronomical distances in cubic miles. I sure don’t know how far back you have to stand from a supernova to avoid getting turned into a cloud of nicely toasted atoms, but apparently the material being ejected from the star can travel at speeds up to 10% lightspeed, or about thirty thousand kilometers per second. Exactly how fast the various warp factors are is all over the place, but we know warp one is lightspeed. So the Enterprise can outrun a supernova, if it gets going in time. Let’s give a generous safety estimate and say it takes a minute to go to warp. At thirty thousand kilometers a second, in the space of that minute the ejecta, or in scientific terms, the Big Hot Cloud of Death, could travel about 1,800,000 kilometers, so theoretically they’ll be safe if they hang farther back than that. For comparison, one Astronomical Unit, defined as the average distance from the Earth to the Sun, is about 150 million kilometers. Astronomically speaking, they could get within spitting distance of this star and call it a safe point. I mean, they probably shouldn’t. But they could.

Anyway, while they’re hanging out waiting for the show to start, Sulu suddenly reports that he’s getting “readings of humanoid life-forms from Isis III!” Spock is dubious.

[ID: Two comic panels. In the first, Kirk is sitting in his captain’s chair saying, “What do you make of that, Mr. Spock?” Spock, standing next to him with his hands on his hips, is saying, “Highly unlikely, captain! Earlier, and much more thorough sensor scans suggest no such signs of life!” In the second panel Kirk is saying, “But you don’t deny that these readings are genuine?” and Spock replies, “Most likely a malfunction in the system, captain! The chances are 87.663125 to 1 in favor of it!”]

love Spock’s pose in the first panel there

Kirk isn’t having it. “When that ‘1’ may be a human life, I consider the odds even!” he declares, somehow jumping to the conclusion that because the life signs are humanoid they must be human, even though practically everybody in this galaxy is humanoid. Point is, he intends to check this out, so he tells Uhuru to get a fix on the sensor readings. Which is not her job, and also, not her name.

[ID: Kirk half-turning to Uhura, who is sitting at her station, and saying, “Lt. Uhuru, get me a fix on those readings!” Uhura says, “Roger!”]

THIS IS THE THIRD TIME, GUYS, COME ON IT’S JUST NOT THAT DIFFICULT

Kirk then orders Sulu to set a course for Isis III. Spock quite sensibly points out that even if the sensors are right and there are people down there, they can’t evacuate a whole planet in the forty-eight hours before the star blows. Kirk isn’t having that either.

[ID: Kirk pointing at Spock, whose ears are drawn abnormally large in profile, and saying, “We can try!” Someone off-panel is saying, “Captain?”]

“Captain, that statement is so ludicrous it made my ears stand up straight!”

So last issue, the scanners reported no life signs, so they sent a landing party down to check. This issue, the scanners are reporting life signs, which Spock says must be a malfunction, so they’re going to send a landing party down to check. I’m starting to wonder why they even bother scanning for life in the first place if they’re so determined to go down and check anyway.

Meanwhile, Uhura has a report on the upcoming planet. I’d question how she got sensor data at the communications station, but as this panel demonstrates, whoever drew this clearly never saw the actual bridge set, so perhaps it’s a bit much to expect whoever wrote it to remember what everyone’s jobs are. Or their ethnicites. Not only is Uhura white once again, they didn’t even color in her earring separately, which results in a somewhat disturbing image.

[ID: Uhura, colored with a pale Caucasian skin tone, looking out over the bridge, where Kirk is sitting in a bright pink chair, and in front of him two helm officers are sitting at a control panel. A viewscreen is visible at the end of the bridge, with several computer screens below it. Uhura is saying, “Class M planet, sir! Capable of supporting human life! Sensors indicate a massive life-force, suggesting a large population! I don’t understand how Federation probes could have missed them!” Her large hoop earring is colored the same as her skin, making it appear to be part of her ear.]

Man, gauges got kinda extreme by the twenty-third century.

Uhura goes on to report that she has a fix on the life signs, but it’s weird, because “All the life-force is emanating from one spot as if the entire population were on the head of a pin!” “Perhaps that’s why your earlier probes missed them, Spock!” Kirk comments. “They’re either midgets...or angels!” Spock then starts to give the odds against this before Kirk cuts him off. Yes. Hilarious.

Kirk tells Uhuru (sigh) to get ready to beam down with him and Spock, and to inform Chapel that she’s coming with too. “She has proven to be of invaluable assistance on past missions!” he explains, and I use the term ‘explains’ loosely.

The unorthodox landing party is soon ready to beam out, although that might prove to be difficult because apparently a terrible transporter accident has fused the bridge and the transporter room together.

[ID: Two panels. In the first, Kirk, Spock, Uhura and Chapel are standing on the transporter pad, with Sulu and Scotty looking at some screens in the foreground. Kirk is saying, “Sulu, how much of a safety factor do we have?” Sulu replies, “24 hours, sir!” In the second panel, Kirk is leaning in and saying, “Scotty, I want you to wait precisely 23 hours, 59 minutes for us and then warp out of her immediately!” Scotty, who is sitting at what looks like one of the bridge stations, says, “Aye, aye, captain!”]

WHERE ARE WE

So...unless it took them twenty-four hours to get that landing party ready, they still have forty-eight hours before the sun goes nova. I’m not sure exactly what Sulu’s ‘safety factor’ means, but I’m guessing he means the buffer of extra time they’ve allotted to make sure they can get out of there before things get really dangerous. Which means Kirk is telling Scotty to leave...one minute before they have twenty-four hours before the sun explodes?

Having left those baffling instructions in their wake, the landing party beams down, and has the perfunctory exchange of comments.

[ID: Chapel, Uhura, Spock and Kirk standing against a dull purplish-gray sky with some foliage creeping into the panel on the right. A narration box says, “Soon…” Chapel is saying, “Wow! I’ll never get used to that sensation!” Uhura says, “Nor to the sight of a new world! Amazing! That sky!” Spock says, “Atmospheric conditions are caused by pre-nova solar activity!” Kirk says, “We’re not here to sight-see!”]

Wow, that sky. Breathtaking. Incredible. I’m in awe.

After reminding everyone that they are not here to sight-see, they’re here to save a WORLD! Kirk asks Chapel where they should be going, since their landing site is mysteriously devoid of all the people they were expecting to find there. Chapel says she doesn’t know because the atmosphere is scrambling her equipment. Dang Federation technology gets scrambled the moment you take it out of the packaging.

Uhura and Spock then have a baffling exchange in which she comments that she “feel[s] like we’d been plopped down on a “Doomsday Earth” movie set!” and Spock replies “For all intents and purposes, we have, Lieutenant!” I’m not sure if Spock understands what a movie set is. Or possibly I don’t understand what a movie set is, or at least what a “Doomsday Earth” movie set is. Ultimately it’s irrelevant though, because the conversation is cut off by Spock getting attacked by a giant cloud of spray cheese.

[ID: A tall panel in which Uhura is yelling, “Look out!” and pushing Spock out of the way of a beam of yellow energy strikes down from the sky in front of him with a “PHFFAZZZ!”]

Kirk declares that “Whatever we do, we better get out of HERE, fast!” and takes off running, but Spock grabs him and pulls him in the other direction; turns out that somehow in the past five seconds or so that Kirk was occupied, the rest of the landing party found a path. Which Kirk is pretty sure wasn’t there before, but there’s no time to deliberate on that, with more spray cheese energy bolts on their tail.

[ID: Kirk, Chapel, Uhura and Spock running through some woods with bolts of energy striking all around them, making “PAHZAZ!” “PHFFFZING!” and “PAHZOWIE!” noises.]

“Don’t ask, captain! Just keep moving!” Spock says. But Kirk, of course, isn’t going to let a little thing like running for his life distract him from asking questions. “I don’t like it, Mr. Spock!” he declares as they charge through the bolts. “This path from nowhere! These bolts just missing! It’s as if someone were herding us somewhere! But where?”

Fortunately we don’t have long to wait for the answer to that question, because in the very next panel Chapel points out a rather attention-grabbing landmark up ahead.

[ID: A full page containing mostly one large panel with two smaller ones, inset at the top and bottom. In the top panel, Chapel is pointing into the distance and saying, “Perhaps there, captain!” while Uhura, behind her, says, “Goodness!” In the main panel, the landing party is looking through a tangle of trees towards a large angular pyramid-like building with two flights of steps leading up to the top and a door inset under an archway in front. A yellow triangle with an eye symbol in the middle is hovering above it. Uhura is saying, “What is it, captain?” Kirk says, “I was just going to ask Spock that!” Spock says, “It appears to be a religious temple!” In the bottom right panel, the group has gathered around the door of the building. Uhura is saying, “It reminds me of ancient temples to the sun!” Chapel is saying, “Captain! My sensor’s going crazy! There must be an army inside there!”]

alright, who summoned Bill Cipher

I appreciate that Kirk’s first reaction to seeing this thing was going to be asking Spock, who has exactly the same amount of information about it as Kirk does, what it is. Which I’m not sure is a great idea in this case, because Spock’s over there leaping to some big ol conclusions. Sure, that could be a religious temple, but it could just as easily be a tomb, a dwelling, a government building, hell it could be an artfully decorated grain silo. There’s no way to know just by looking at the outside of it! Geez, keep this guy away from archaeological sites.

Kirk declares that they’re going inside the temple, since that’s quite obviously the intended way to advance the adventure. Chapel protests that they might be walking into a trap, but Kirk says they don’t have much choice—the path they came by has disappeared again. Oh, so this is definitely a trap, then. Kirk orders them all to put their phasers on stun and aim them at the door, presumably intending to stun the door into submission. But before anyone can fire, the door opens on its own.

[ID: Two panels. In the first, the landing party is gathered around the doors, which appear to be opening on their own, while a voice from within calls, “WELCOME! BEINGS OF EARTH...AND WATER!” Chapel says, “That voice! Like a light in my head!” In the second panel, we see through the doors to where an indistinct robed figure is sitting in a tall chair surrounded by curtains, saying, “Enter the temple of the sun! Home of the sun-god incarnate! Enter crew of the Enterprise!” Someone offscreen says, “Incredible!”]

Huh.

Foregoing all thought of this being a trap, Kirk strolls on in through the door, the better to put his hand to his chest dramatically and say, “You—you know us???”

“You are not the only ones with “eyes,” captain!” the robed woman replies, in a rather disconcerting use of quotation marks. “I saw you out there...watching! You were curious about me, so I, in turn, am curious about you!”

Kirk asks if she’s aware that she and the rest of her people are in some serious danger, but she’s not fazed in the least: “I know that my time grows short! As does everyone’s and every thing’s!” “But you don’t have to die!” Kirk says. “We can save you! We can take you aboard our...boat in the sky! And take you to a safe place!” Smooth, Kirk.

The woman only says that she did not summon them there to save her. “You wished to see me die,” she says, “I give you your chance!” This thoroughly baffles everyone in the landing party, since last time they checked no one summoned them here at all. Evidently they’ve missed something.

[ID: Kirk approaches up the steps towards the woman sitting on the throne, who is draped in a yellow cloak with a red head covering. Kirk is saying, “Look, I don’t know where you got the idea we came to watch you die, but maybe the rest of your people aren’t so eager! Where are they?” The woman says, “Alas, they left but moments before you arrived!”]

Or we could just decide the old woman is the one who’s wrong, that works too.

Kirk asks where all these people left to, and the woman points off somewhere and says, “There! From whence they came!” Helpful. Kirk wonders if this means they’re all dead and buried and the woman is the last of her race, but Chapel says she’s still picking up a huge amount of life-force from around the temple, more than one person could account for. I’m still trying to figure out how the heck their sensors are quantifying ‘life-force.’ I mean life signs, I could understand life signs, I could understand detecting, say, heartbeats or respiration or a thermal signature, but apparently Chapel’s just straight up got some kind of aura reader over there.

Kirk—very dramatically—asks the woman just who she is. She tells him.

[ID: The landing party stand in a line looking at the woman, who is extending her hands upward and saying, “I am the warmth! I am the light! I am the giver! I am the protector! I am Isis, the god of the sun!” Kirk is thinking, “You’re also a warp four loony!”]

Nice, Kirk, very diplomatic thought bubble there. The use of ‘warp four’ there also implies a scale of looniness that goes up to at least seven.

Kirk asks Spock what he thinks of Isis. Spock refrains from giving any rankings of looniness, only speculating that perhaps she was left here as a sacrifice. So we’re just dismissing the god theory out of hand, huh? Ordinarily that would be considered a reasonable enough decision, but you guys have already met several beings who may not necessarily have been divine from a theological standpoint but sure had enough power to make that pretty much a moot point. I’m just saying, if I’d personally encountered folks like the Metrons, the Thasians, Trelane and his parents, etc, I’d at least take a minute to hear out anyone else who told me they were a god, just to save any nasty surprises down the line.

But instead, Kirk tells Chapel to stay with Isis—not for any particular reason that he feels like explaining—while the rest of the party goes out to look around some more. “The other inhabitants must be around here someplace,” he says as they walk outside, “and we are going to find them!”

Uhura points out that the path is still gone, but this doesn’t bother Kirk. Not because it is usually actually possible to walk through woodland without a path (sometimes unpleasant, but usually possible) but because hey, they’ve got phasers, so they can make a path. He tells the other two to set theirs to ‘heat blasts. I didn’t realize that was an option for phasers.

[ID: Spock, Kirk and Uhura firing their phasers into a copse of trees with a ‘PHFFFIZZZZZLE!’ Kirk is saying, “Fire!” Spock says, “Captain! Nothing! Our phasers don’t fire!” Uhura says, “I think….we’re being….surrounded.”]

And evidently, I was right about that.

I don’t know what Uhura thinks is surrounding them that requires such heavy use of ellipses, but Kirk yells for everyone to get back inside, then throws his phaser at a tree for good measure. But once back inside, they find Chapel passed out on the floor. Uhura, who is not a nurse or doctor, and is using no tricorder or other medical equipment, nevertheless manages to instantly identify the problem as sunstroke. Kirk is so distraught by this that his hand starts mutating.

[ID: Kirk gesturing towards Spock with one arm bent in an unnatural position to put his hand on his head, his thumb inexplicably large and also at a wrong angle. Kirk says, “What’s going on around here??? Has this world gone crazy! Beam us out of here, Spock! Now!” Spock says, “I can’t captain! Solar flares are interfering with communications to our ship!”]

you okay there buddy

“I fear we are trapped here, Captain!” Spock declares. Oh, what a surprise.

[ID: A splash page titled STAR TREK: DEATH OF A STAR: PART 2. It shows the Enterprise orbiting a planet with a bright sun in the distance. A narration box at the top reads, “Captain’s Log, supplemental: While the Enterprise orbits helplessly overhead, due to interference from the near-nova sun, we are trapped on a planet marked for doom! Our desperate search for Isis III’s mysterious inhabitants has only led us to a strange old woman! But now I have a more immediate concern than saving the lives of the inhabitants—namely, saving the lives of the crew and myself!” Below that a smaller narration box reads, “On the Enterprise...” Two speech bubbles are coming from the Enterprise, one reading, “Are you sure about these figures this time, laddie?” and the other one, “I’ve checked and double checked everything, Scotty!”]

Part two begins with Scotty harassing Sulu in an exchange so generic you could probably stick the dialogue into a good half of all TOS episodes with barely any variation. “I hope you reach the captain before it’s too late for all of us!” Scotty says, to which Sulu replies, “I’m trying but something down there is interfering!” Having established this very important bit of information about what the people back on the ship are getting up to, we immediately leave them behind again and get back to the planet.

Kirk helps Chapel up, or at least, he kneels beside her and says, “Are you feeling better, nurse?” Yes, Chapel says, she’s fine now, but she doesn’t know what happened—she just fainted. No worries, low blood sugar happens to the best of us.

But Kirk isn’t satisfied with that. “You!” he shouts at Isis. “You’re behind all this, somehow, aren’t you?!” Unconcerned as ever, Isis replies, “You have come to record my death! So be it! But on my terms!”

Rather than make any effort to engage with her to figure out what she means, Kirk declares that this whole thing is hopeless-- “trapped on a sinking ship with a lunatic!” That’s what I love about Kirk, he’s so sensitive and respectful. But Spock has had an idea. Maybe, he says, when Isis said her people were “down there” she meant it literally. Perhaps they’re underground, in some sort of shelter. Wait...you mean, it’s possible that Isis could actually have meant what she said? I dunno about that, man. I mean, what she said didn’t immediately make sense to us, so I’m pretty sure it must be total nonsense.

But there’s not much else for them to do, so Kirk has Uhuru (sigh) and Chapel stay behind to try and get “some sense out of Isis” while he and Spock go looking for some kind of passage or tunnel around this joint. It takes all of one panel before Spock locates the incredibly obvious switch on the wall that opens a secret door.

[ID: Kirk and Spock standing in a long stone corridor, facing the wall. Spock is pressing on a large panel engraved with a triangle-eye symbol, which makes a CLICK! He says, “Captain! Come quick! I believe I have found a way to our “Lost Isisians!” Between him and Kirk a door is opening in the wall with a ‘HYMMMMMMMM MMMMMM’.]

For an extremely loose definition of ‘secret’, anyway.

While Spock and Kirk are off making their Perception checks, Isis, having finally gotten rid of that annoying guy who keeps shouting at her whenever she tries to say anything, leads Uhura and Chapel out on a walk in the garden, because “There is much yet to say and little time to say it!” As they head outside, some mysterious lights appear.

[ID: Chapel and Uhura flanking Isis, each with a hand on her back, leading her down a path through some greenery. A line of sparkling orbs is snaking around the three women.]

That’s probably fine.

Meanwhile, Spock is showing off his discovery to Kirk, when suddenly...uh, actually, I’m not entirely sure what’s going on here. I guess either the switch opened up the door in the wall and then a second door in the floor underneath them, or else they both just tripped and fell through the first door.

[ID: Three panels. On the top left, Kirk and Spock are looking at the door opening into the wall. A narration box leads, “Suddenly, while Mr. Spock investigates...” Kirk says, “What is it, Mr. Spock? What have you found!” Spock says, “Very simple, Captain. This “eye” seems to operate some kind of…..” On the right, a long panel shows Kirk and Spock falling into an abyss, Spock yelling, “...TRAP DOOOOR!” while Kirk yells, “WE’RE FLOATING! SPOCK!” On the bottom left, Kirk and Spock have landed in a cave. Spock says, “Though the odds were against it, there must have been a second passageway below our feet!” Kirk says, “Odds or no odds…..”]

What do you mean, the odds were against it? Spock, I don’t know if you’ve been playing too much Oblivion lately or what, but the architectural features of most buildings are not randomly generated. People either put doors in places or they don’t, there’s not just like a 30% chance of a trapdoor spawning in any given location.

But regardless of how the passage got there, they’ve clearly happened upon something significant. Or, as Kirk puts it:

[ID: Kirk and Spock look out through the cavern at a large underground city in the distance. Kirk puts his hand on Spock’s shoulder and says, “You’ve hit the jackpot, Mr. Spock!”]

Any hopes of locating a friendly NPC and getting some exposition about this weird place are quickly dashed, though, because closer examination reveals the city to be a thoroughly abandoned ruin. As they explore, Kirk wonders once again where everyone went, and why they left Isis behind. Luckily, Spock happens to stumble upon a room that has exactly what they need.

[ID: Three panels. On the top left, Spock is beckoning Kirk into a room that contains a pile of tapes and other junk in the corner. Spock says, “Perhaps these will tell us, captain!” Kirk says, “What have you got there, Mr. Spock?” In the right panel, Spock and Kirk look towards the tapes, each with a glowing spot on their forehead. Spock says, “They appear to be history tapes, captain!” Kirk says, “I can hear them, see them inside my head!” In the bottom panel, the light on Kirk’s head projects an image of a planet in space with a sun shining in the distance and a triangle with an eye hanging above the planet. A disembodied narrator says, “At first there was only “the eye”, Isis!”]

Well that’s an unorthodox method of data storage.

The tapes go on to explain how Isis—represented here by an Eye of Providence for some reason-- created life on the planet, inasmuch as the word ‘explain’ can be used to mean ‘somehow made things even more confusing than they were to begin with.’

[ID: Four panels. On the top left, a red sun is shining above a jungle, with the pyramid floating above it all. The narrator says, “And ISIS looked down on our world and saw that there was no light!” On the top right, the pyramid floats above the planet with a stream of tiny yellow eyes falling from it onto the planet, while the narrator says, “So Isis seeded the earth with her eyes!” On the bottom left, the eyes fall onto the ground, and a fuzzy red humanoid figure emerges from the earth. “And there-in rose up a people called Isisians!” On the bottom right, the figure looks up at the sun, which now has the pyramid in it. “And when they looked up there was light! For Isis now lived among them!”]

I’m...assuming this is some kind of metaphor, but it might make just as much sense either way.

Anyway, the Isisians (try saying that one three times fast) built the temple to house Isis, who proceeded to stay there to be with her children on the planet. Everything was great for a while, but “all things must pass! Even peoples! Even suns!”

[ID: A panel showing several figures gathered around the temple as the pyramid jumps up into the sky while the narrator says “And thus it came time for Isis to return to the sky, taking with her the gifts of life and light!”]

“alright my children it’s been fun but I gotta bounce byyyeeeeee”

The narrator (do you think they got some famous Isisian VA to do this?) concludes by relating that “in the twilight of our race, we have groped blindly underground to make this our final resting place! Yet we are not bitter! We are sad! For one day Isis too must give up the eye and pass! Thus ends our story! Thus ends our race!” So, what, they recorded their entire history and just left it laying around on a tape in some random room before they all went extinct? Were they intending for someone to come find this someday as a last record of them or did they just do it for kicks?

Well, anyway, Kirk is impressed. “Am I correct in assuming, Spock, that we have heard the legend of a people long since extinct?” he asks. “25 million years extinct, Captain, if my estimate is accurate!” Spock replies. Your...your estimate? Your estimate based on what, exactly? Did you just look around the city and go “hmmm yeah this looks about 25 million years old” or what? Also, that is one hell of a sturdy record tape that’s still fully functional 25 million years later. Can I get one of those anywhere? Cause I’ve had this harddrive for like five years and it’s starting to go on me.

Back up on the ship, Sulu is being pointed at so dramatically he’s having to lean back to get out of the way.

[ID: A panel showing the Enterprise bridge, with a narration box reading “Meanwhile, on board the Enterprise...” Scotty is pointing dramatically at Sulu, saying, “Still no luck, Sulu?” Sulu, only his head visible at an awkward angle in the corner of the panel, is saying, “No sir!”]

Scotty proceeds to explain to Sulu, who presumably already knows all this, that “Ya got tah raise ‘em, laddie! When the captain beamed down we told him he had twenty-four hours! But that was a mistake! That blasted star could go at any minute according to our new figures! If we stay, the whole ship’s in danger! If we go….” That’s all in one panel, by the way—there’s barely room for his head left under the speech bubble.

Having delivered his exposition, there’s not much left for Scotty to do but tell Sulu to keep doing what he’s been doing. Meanwhile, we’re told that Spock and Kirk “returned to the surface via the transport tube.” Ah yes, the transport tube. The transport tube that was definitely clearly established before that panel. That transport tube. Oh, and Uhura tells them she no longer wishes to change Isis’s mind.

[ID: Spock, Kirk, Uhura and Chapel standing in front of some trees and bushes, while Isis stands in the right corner. Kirk is saying, “You what??” Chapel says, “We no longer wish to change her mind, captain! We respect her right to die!” Uhura says, “She has a kind of nobility, sir! A soul! I have a tremendous empathy for her!”]

What, did you not think she had a soul before?

Kirk, apparently, takes quite a hard line on the whole right to die debate, because he immediately accuses Isis of bewitching his crewmembers. “See if you can reason with Isis!” he tells Spock, having made absolutely no attempt to reason with Isis. “I give up!”

Spock says he’ll try, but “logic rarely works on humans!” He then confronts Isis on how she earlier claimed that her people left just moments ago, “Yet there have been no humans on this world for millions of years! How do you explain that?” Which is an odd thing to say, considering that the images of the Isisians we saw were quite clearly not humans, yet Spock’s first statement rules out the idea of him using ‘human’ as a catchall term for sapient lifeforms. Evidently Spock’s definition of ‘human’ is ‘everybody in the galaxy that’s not a Vulcan.’

“So you have heard the legend of Isis?” Isis says, still as unperturbed as ever. “What do you think of it?” “An interesting folk tale!” Spock replies. Evidently this was not the right answer.

[ID: Spock and Isis stand in the background, Isis with one hand on Spock’s forehead, as she says, “Your logic is a cage, Mr. Spock! Come closer and let me set you free!” Red and yellow swirls are extending out from her in all directions. In the foreground, Chapel, Uhura and Kirk are watching. Uhura says, “Captain? What’s happening to her?” Kirk, leaning away in alarm, says, “I don’t know! It looks like...yes! That’s it!”]

What? What is it? What’s happening? Is she...no, she couldn’t be...

[ID: A tall panel showing the pyramid of Isis at the top with red and yellow light/flames emanating from it as the four landing party members float in the air. Isis says, “Farewell! Kirk says, “ISIS IS EXPLO...”]

Hmm, still not sure what’s going on. Could we get that confirmed one more time, please?

[ID: A panel on the Enterprise bridge, with a narration box reading, “On the Enterprise...” Sulu is standing up from his helm panel, saying, “The planet is exploding right now, sir!” Scotty rises from his own chair and says, “Then it’s...”]

cool thanks

Before Scotty can get the bagpipes out for a funeral dirge, our brave heroes are whisked onto the bridge, remarkably unexploded. For another few seconds, at least.

[ID: Three panels. On the top right, a narration box reads “At that exact instant...” above Chapel, Uhura, Kirk and Spock appearing on the bridge in a flash of light. Scotty, in the foreground, exclaims, “Captain Kirk! Spock!! Uhura! Chapel! How??” Someone in the landing party says, “Oooo! What’s happening? Am I dreaming?” On the bottom left, Scotty throws out his hands towards Sulu, saying, “Sulu! Warp eight! Immediately!” while Sulu says, “It’s...too...” On the bottom right, Sulu yells, “...Late! Ugh!” as explosions rock the bridge with ‘OOF!’ and ‘EEEEEEEEE!’ sounds and the helm shorts out with a ‘BZZZZT!’]

well maybe we would’ve had time if Scotty hadn’t stood around shouting the names of every single person in the landing party

And then the planet explodes. Hang on, I thought it was the sun that was exploding? Man, supernovas are confusing.

Luckily for the Enterprise, it turns out supernovas are also remarkably like hurricanes.

[ID: A large panel showing the Enterprise caught in a stream of energy from the pyramid of Isis as rocks and flame explode out from it. A narration box at the top reads, “The Enterprise is buffeted like a paper airplane in a hurricane as the force of a billion atomic bombs washes over it! Yet, like a hurricane, there is a place of calm in the center of the violence and the Enterprise, as though guided by some unseen protector, rides out the storm...in “the eye” of the hurricane!”]

Or, to put things less poetically:

[ID: The Enterprise bridge filled with smoke, a narration box reading “Suddenly...” Scotty, looking up with a stunned expression, says, “It’s a miracle! We’re saved! We’re in some sort of space pocket!”]

is that like a hot pocket

Unconcerned by the smoke now filling the bridge, Scotty asks Kirk what happened down on the planet. “I’m not sure, Scotty!” Kirk says, speaking for the audience. He asks Spock what he saw when Isis touched his forehead. Spock replies that he “felt...er...admiration, captain! And I saw things...inconceivable things! And I saw that a star had taken on human form in its final hours, so that it could talk to us!”

“You mean that Isis really was Isis?” Uhura exclaims. “It does explain a lot of things, lieutenant!” Kirk says. “Like how she could use the planet’s resources against us! And how she was able to block communications!” ...does it explain those things? Can stars usually control planets? Did I miss that episode of Cosmos?

As the Enterprise flies off, Kirk wonders if this means that stars really are living beings. “From what I glimpsed, captain, they may be more “alive” than we are!” Spock replies.

[ID: The Enterprise flies away with star-filled space on its right and a blue sky with a large sun on its left. A speech bubble from the ship reads, “Mr. Spock, next time we’re in the vicinity, remind me to have a long chat with our “lucky ole sun”, will you?”]

I dunno man, it didn’t go super well when they tried it in that Doctor Who episode.

And so ends another issue, with yet another planet destroyed. There’s not gonna be many planets left by the time this series ends. At least they didn’t start any wars on this one first, although I’m sure if there had been more than one person down there they would have found a way.

#star trek #star trek gold key #recap tag #star trek gold key recaps #GK 30 Death of a Star

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