#also yes that means I wrote more than 400k words in two years
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So all my Oneshot documents are named „working scenes“ and then a number behind it. My Chromebook can’t handle docs bigger than 100k so I have 4 full docs just of oneshots.
I made the newest one at the beginning of my Lesso hyperfocus exactly 14days ago… it’s already at 60k words and only containing Lesso Oneshots (one of them isn’t really a oneshot but more like novella length but we don’t talk about that). Like usually all the others have different type of fandom Oneshots, even if one fandom is the main player. Not this time, I should probably rename it but I refuse
#my first working scene doc I made on the 4.12.20#my newest one (the Lesso one) on the 4.12.22#coincidence? i think not#also yes that means I wrote more than 400k words in two years#not counting my original scenes and the book I wrote this year#i don’t even know what to say to that#schreiber schreibt#schreiber schreibt too fucking much#creative writing
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hi my love i’m hope not too late but i would like you to tell me about my loves jewish cake, anything you want to but specifically baker calum 🥰 thank you i love you
of course you aren’t too late!!! ESPECIALLY to talk about jewish cake oh my goodness meg i shall die for you i love you. alright let’s see what i can dig up
ha’ahava hazot shelanu + it’s so simple
a cut, per usual
so let’s start WITH:
ha’ahava hazot shelanu
jewish cake was a labor of love for myself. little known fact about me is that i am in fact jewish! :) and around christmas time i always get a little prickly about the surplus of christmas spirit and in this case the amount of fic for it. and i’d sort of had this hesitant idea to write a jewish fic in the back of my mind for a long time, but it felt like a really big divergence from the Cast of Characters that was for some reason a lot more dramatic than any other circumstances into which i could place them, so i’d basically been hesitating for several months. in november we had a brief conversation about it in the club which looked like this
but the idea still made me a little nervous and so i kind of talked myself out of writing it, as always. and THEN, middle of december, iba sent me this 1d fic out of nowhere with this accompanying message:
and i kinda lowkey almost cried!! it was such a jewish fic. i read the word kvetch and i almost lost it. the fic was just so unabashedly jewish. and i was like...well. that’s what ive been wanting to do. so now i have no reason not to do it.
in the ao3 notes i talked a little bit about my internal debate over How Jewish To Go with the fic because on the one hand i really do understand that it can feel alienating going into a fic with zero understanding of the culture but on the other hand since it was MY fic i wanted to make it jewish the way i’m jewish. which is like...............very. i don’t think i ended up striking a balance so much as just deciding to say fuck it and write it the way i would want to read it, but i definitely think that was the right decision for me.
there was actually one more motivator for writing this fic, especially the WAY i wrote it, in eight chapters, and that motivator was that i wanted to break 400k on ao3 before the year ended. i just wanted to have an even number and 400k was a good goal. which i did achieve thanks to jewish cake fic being the 13.6k beast that she is! so that was also part of it
NOW! as for the PROCESS. i created the doc on december 22 and i originally kind of thought it was a little bitchy to write a hanukkah fic after hanukkah had already ended but was reminded that most christmas fic is neither written nor posted on actual christmas which reassured me well enough. i had already had the idea to divide it into eight chapters for the eight nights of hanukkah and i thought that would be a nice way to showcase different aspects of the holiday (seeing family, playing dreidel, opening presents etc) and also in certain cases (like the third chapter where they do some baking) some days that weren’t necessarily hanukkah-driven but just a nice natural consequence of being on break for hanukkah. i wanted it to feel like hanukkah feels to me!! normally i don’t like people seeing the way my outlines look but this one i don’t mind sharing so here’s what i had at the top of the doc for reference while i was writing. not everything in that first list got included but most of it did !!!
i’m not really sure how this fic ended up being cake. i never used to default to cake but for some reason as i was diving into this one it just felt right. that’s all i can say about that. meg you have genuinely shifted my approach to fic i DO default to cake sometimes now and that’s on YOU.
the very first thing i ever wrote down for this fic was this part that ended up going in the summary:
“Happy Hanukkah,” Calum says, smiling at Luke as their fingers intertwine.
Luke murmurs, “Chag sameach, ahovi,” and Calum’s face is aglow in the candlelight.
that was The Moment for me. i didn’t even write the rest of that scene until later but i had those two lines written down straight out the gate and i knew they were gonna close out the first scene because it just Felt Right. and i was right! very cool and fun for me
now the nice convenient thing about having this fic separated into eight discrete scenes/nights/chapters was that i didn’t have to write it in order, and i didn’t. i DID write the first night/chapter first, but then over the course of maybe a week, i wrote (deep breath get ready): the first half of chapter 2 (hemmings family) > the beginning of chapter 5 (the dreidel game) > most of the scene in chapter 7 > the beginning of chapter 3 (where they bake) > finished writing chapters 2 & 3 > started chapter 4 and finished chapter 5 > finished chapter 4 and wrote the rest of chapter 7 > all of chapter 6 > all of chapter 8 aka the proposal. i deliberately saved the proposal for last because i don’t think i could have written it exactly right without knowing the events that came before it but everything else was all over the place as you can see.
a problem i ran into a lot, and i talked to my sounding board and fellow jew sam about this among many other things, was that i had a lot of trouble characterizing very obviously Not Jewish people in a way that made them Very Jewish. not even like, Jewish But You Can Ignore It. i wanted them to be front-and-center jewish like i am and that was hard for me to navigate because obviously my speech patterns and vocabulary as an american jew are extremely different from 5sos’s as australian goyim (non-jews) like i do use hebrew words in my day-to-day communication all the time and i somehow had to keep their mannerisms but also insert mine BUT not insert so many of mine that the fic became incomprehensible and it was just. a Challenge. here’s some insight into THAT crisis
and then again writing the other characters in other chapters
i sent sam the doc when i was mostly done writing it, mainly just to be reminded that at least one person was going to appreciate this fic, which worked out nicely because she very very much did. genuinely i cannot stress enough how insecure i was to write and share this fic. like i’m gonna be really straight up with you meg, i think part of the reason i had calum and luke baking sufganiyot was because to me that felt like a sort of bribe? i basically wrote what felt to me like the least appealing fic ever and then my mission from there was to add stuff in that would convince people to give it a shot anyway. i was trying to make it worth everyone’s while. the baking was my trade-off, i was like “well yeah it’s a jewish fic but maybe she’ll be happy enough that it’s cake and they’re baking that she’ll forgive it for being a jewish fic” yes i realize how kind of hilariously tragic this sounds but !!! you never get jewish fics!!! and you especially don’t get them in fanfiction for obviously non-jewish bands!!! anyway. we’re not gonna get into this whole thing but like. even though objectively i knew that i had been told again and again people would appreciate the fic i still had doubts and knowing something and feeling secure in it are very different things.
also, i didn’t remember this, but apparently i had a lot of problems with writing the proposal! here’s a sneak peek into that mental breakdown
don’t actually think the fic specifies (making life easier for myself) but they have already had dinner in that scene. so now you know.
i could choose to not get this elbows-deep in the details of Crises I Had While Writing This Fic but instead i am choosing to go all out. here’s another thing i had trouble with:
(i did end up using transliteration obviously but i DO think actual hebrew would have been a cool flex)
and as for the title, ha’ahava hazot shelanu is the name of an ivri lider song that i love, and it translates to “this love of ours” and i realize titling the fic in hebrew was a Choice but i did talk to sam about this as well and that went roughly like this
by the way here is the song, i absolutely love it and i cannot recommend it enough. also i’m not sure how glaringly obvious this is but the chapter titles on ao3 are just hebrew numbers. like the first chapter is echad which literally means one. and so on. are they the correct genders? i don’t know ! fuck gendered language.
one more thing and then ill move on but an unfortunate natural consequence of writing a hanukkah fic (at least the way i wrote this one) is that it necessitates presents. so i had to come up with presents for these dumb boys to give each other. and to be completely honest with you i don’t remember how i did!!! the ones calum got for luke were trickier because they were actual things. for some reason this luke was always a version of luke that just kinda like, wore makeup, so that was just a question of figuring out an eyeshadow palette that would be Nice but not obscenely schmancy (i did ask the club for help since i know nothing about makeup but as usual i ignored their replies). but that by itself didn’t feel like enough of a gift, and so i tried to think of something that would be more than just the gift of an object. like, something that would maybe enable luke to spend more time on something he loves. piano music made sense to me because it wasn’t just a thing by itself it was a thing that encouraged luke to play piano and even to improve at it and to learn songs that he could be excited about. so! that was that
the trip to israel gift was a little bit of a retcon situation i really liked the idea that luke had been planning to give that “gift” to calum for a hot sec that he’d have had it ready, but i’d already written the scene where he and mali talk about israel, so i went back to it and edited it a little to hint at the idea (luke plays it off very casually because he is a clever boy) but i thought there was something very romantic in the idea of the israel trip, of luke planning a future with calum and a trip to a place that means so much to him (to me yes maybe luke and i are the same blah blah) and getting to drag calum around to falafel places and teach him words in hebrew and it just seemed like the appropriate trip for these two cute jewish boys to plan so i rolled with it.
okay moving on slightly!! to baker calum <3 baker calum was more of a cameo in the hanukkah fic, in the chapter i wrote with you in mind, but i can talk about it’s so simple here as well because i fucking adore that fic.
it’s so simple
so the inspiration behind the fic came from the “kitchens are for lovers” rhetoric and the realization that that would be the perfect...sort of thesis to build on for a fic for you in specific, because you are, in my mind, a very kitchen-based person, given your baking habit. it actually just worked out pretty nicely for me honestly because i’ve been wanting to write a big Kitchen Romance type fic for a while and you just gave me the perfect opportunity. here’s what i had at the top of the doc for the fic for you
and then once i sort of landed on the idea for the fic, it just made a lot of sense to make it jewish cake because, well, im gonna be real w you, because i identify very strongly with jewish cake and the kitchen-romance aspect felt like a very bella thing in the same way that jewish cake felt like a bella thing. and so i wanted to be able to romanticize these kitchens to share the way that i, bella, feel about them, and that was easy to do when the characters were so similar to me. not to mention this cake already existed in my head as a very settled, domestic duo, and they had their own home and had already had a kitchen-romance scene in the hanukkah fic and the whole thing just fell together perfectly. i had this sentence in my head and it was: “Shabbat in Luke and Calum’s kitchen looks something like this.” the kind of thing you would read in a fic summary right? and especially having it take place on shabbat felt like an extra layer of domestic easy romance to me so that was kind of my guide
here was my "outline” for this:
Romance :)))
obviously calum was going to be the one doing most of the cooking/baking because he had been established as the Kitchen Boy between the two of them and maybe i realized in the course of writing it that while i was luke, you were very much calum. so the goal was then basically to romanticize (1) the kitchen and (2) luke as much as humanly possible for you (see: message sent to helen and ainslee)
unfortunately i was unable to do baker calum justice as much as i would have liked because i could not have him baking anything complex because i can’t bake anything complex and if i had tried to describe him baking something complex and then described it wrong i would have died of shame so that is why he is only baking brownies BUT they have chocolate chips which hopefully makes up for it. also i just stumbled across this which i think pretty well represents the crisis i had regarding baker calum
:)))
re: the soundtrack (so to speak), i wanted to include some songs that i associate with you meg but you see the situation is that some of those songs are 5sos/mali/atl songs and so i couldn’t include those, for obvious reasons, which did narrow down my choices somewhat. fortunately i think the mcfly worked pretty nicely i mean yeah it’s a little obvious that i was forcing mcfly into the story but they deserved to be there. i think i’ve mentioned this but i genuinely have a memory of listening to star girl on a loop in my kitchen at home and in my head the hood-hemmings kitchen looks like my kitchen because i have zero imagination so it felt to me like these songs just belonged in kitchens. and that they’d be inherently romantic. woah i think my brain is short-circuiting i’m not sure i’m making sense anymore. point being i hoped that you would appreciate it nonetheless.
a note about the short introduction, because it’s very unlike anything i’ve put in any other fic to my knowledge. i kind of wanted it to feel like the prologue to a fairytale, almost. i wanted it to feel like the beginning of a movie, when the camera is slowly, slowly zooming in from a Big Picture down to one house on one street and then through the window into the kitchen while the voiceover is very serenely describing the scene. i wanted it to feel like we were in the kitchen before even calum was and that we were standing against the fourth wall watching the fic unfold. and also, i wanted to make the fic romantic as fuck, from the get-go. there was to be no confusion: this fic was going to romanticize the living daylights out of the hood-hemmings kitchen.
(also you may have noticed that despite having “london” in the list of Meg Things at the top of the doc, the fic never actually specifies that they’re in london. that’s because this fic was really an exercise in “how much can i hint that they’re in london without outright saying it so i don’t establish a canon that i may later regret” which went as far as me asking helen what her kitchen floors and counters are made of. like. if you want it to be in london then hell yeah it’s in london but i didn’t wanna lock myself into that decision just in case so i never actually said it but i hope it kinda felt london-y anyway lmao)
so...............i THINK that’s all i have to say. “all” as if i havent just written an entire dissertation but at least it’s done now. i sure did say a lot! that was a lot!!! but also a very very fun and interesting dive into the ~process~ of writing these jewish cake fics. also, for what it’s worth, the way hanukkah fic was received basically calmed all my fears about writing jewish fic, which was a relief for me. so thank you for loving it, i don’t think you know how much that means to me!!!! i love YOU so very much
#kaleidoscopeminds#ask#answered#christ go off i guess????????#i honestly have Nothing to say in the tags because i said so fucking much in this answer#fgldkhgsdflj#here are some other questions i asked helen the resident london expert:#'you guys don't have saturday morning cartoons do you'#'what do you call french toast' to which i was informed that you (brits) don't HAVE french toast#and then i decided to ignore that information and include it anyway because jewish tradition trumps british absence of food#and french toast is jewish CULTURE#'do you guys say suck-up or is there a different thing you say'#i did NOT like the answer to that one#also 'do you guys have dishwashers'#'do you guys do april fools'#helen litearlly went and took a photograph of her counters so that i could see what they looked like. THATS love baby#the fact that i said i had nothign to say and then i continued to say things anyway#thats pretty on brand for me#meg#director's cut#okay im posting this now. FOR REAL#dunno what happened before that was very unsexy but this time for real
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Creator’s update #1
Hey guys! So I’ve decided to start actually blogging on this blog and tell a bit about the various things I’m working on, share WIPs, music I’ve been digging recently etc. I realise that I rarely post anything, so it seems like I’m super inactive - which is totally not true, I just have so much stuff going on and take a long time to finish things, and I’m also pretty picky about what I put up online lol! For the sake of keeping those of you interested in the loop, I’m gonna start this series of creator’s updates in which I’ll update y’all on the progress I’ve made on my various creative projects. The goal is to give an update a few times a month (hopefully lol)!
This past while I’ve been super inactive in the writing department, but very much productive in the art department, so my writing update will be mostly a summary of what I’ve been doing the past few years up until this point.
Mood: Feelin’ real good cuz my parents finally brought my comfy double bed over from my mum’s place this past weekend, which means no more sleeping on the couch yaaaaaas.
Music I’ve been digging recently:
Skye Sweetnam - Boyhunter So, the other day I randomly listened to this song on my way home from work, and I totally realised that Skye Sweetnam is the perfect voice for my character Caitlyn, and this song totally embodies what Caitlyn is all about lmaoooo. (The song isn’t very accurate to the time period Caitlyn lives in, but it’s super accurate to her character essence and personality, and I just find that so lit hahahah)
Fallulah - Out of It This song is basically my MC’s theme song?? It’s performed by a Danish artist and was super popular in Denmark a few years back as it was the theme tune to a Danish tv show (a show I loved!). The lyrics are just so Daniel, it’s not even funny. It mostly fits his mental state at the beginning of Renaissance.
Girl’s Day - Love Again Ugh I just love the tune of this song so much, I can’t really place my finger on it, the emotion is just so great. I love the guitar riff especially, and Girl’s Day is a four member girl group, so it’s one of those songs where I can imagine my main girls Annaliese, Caitlyn, Mary and Serena singing as each member lmao.
Nine Muses - Remember Another four member group now, this song is also one where I can imagine my main girls singing each member’s part lmao, and having that aspect to a song always makes it a little better for me! Forreal tho, this new release from Nine Muses slays, and we all know it. The music video haunts me.
Sistar - Lonely This song makes me sad and happy all at once, cuz I’m not ready to say goodbye to Sistar, but at the same time this ending is probably the best one any fan could’ve wished for because there was no drama or anger, just well wishes and hope for the future. I know these girls will go far, and this song just pulls at all my heart strings man. The melody of the bridge and chorus, Dasom and Soyu’s parts in particular, really works for me. And yeah, Sistar has four members too, and once again I can picture my main girls singing as each member lmao. It’s a thing I have, okay?
Moana OST - We Know The Way + Know Who You Are I recently watched this movie, and while I sorta felt like the plot was a bit rushed and tropey in many ways, I totally adored the visuals and the MUSIC OMG. These two songs are my favourite, Lin-Manuel Miranda’s vocals never miss, and Auli’i Cravalho’s high note is gorgeous! Also dat choir in the background tho, and in context with the movie scene that song just makes me irrationally emotional mkay. (That ending was the best twist ever, it definitely lifted the story up a notch for me!)
Writing
So I’m writing a book! You might have seen me mention it a few times already on here, but I’ve not really shared much insight into my process or what sort of book this actually is (other than talking about characters here and there), and as I’ve not been making huge progress lately (I’m in an art state of mind duuuh), I thought that I’d keep this section short and sweet, with a bit of an introduction into what my book project is all about.
I call it a book project because I don’t feel comfortable just calling it a book when I don’t have rights to publish. Technically my book is a fanfiction based on the horror video game Amnesia: The Dark Descent, and as such I don’t own copyright of the small percentage of my story that features the canon elements. However, I take this as seriously as anyone else would writing their own book, because I’ve poured my entire heart and soul into it, and the vast majority of the content (plot, characters and world) is my original creation. It’s my own little big project lol!
You might be familiar with the game, and even if you aren’t, that’s not a prerequisite for reading my book since everything is introduced and set up just as in any regular book. The protagonist is an Englishman named Daniel, and we know little of his past through the game. I won’t go into too much detail on what the game is about (if you really wanna know, you can look it up), but the point of my book is to explore the protagonist’s life from his childhood up to the events of the game and beyond, and afterwards connect his story to the game sequels featuring other protagonists within the same universe. It’s a bit complex and elaborate, which is just the way I like it!
As the games are set at various points during the Victorian era (game #1 is set in Prussia 1839, game #2 is set in France 1858, and game #3 is set in England 1899), you can probably guess that the entire thing will be pretty long. That’s why I’m making it a series! I have at least seven books planned so far (though there’ll definitely be more, since I’m not near the end of the timeline I need to cover yet), and I currently have the first book written and am writing the sequel - however, the first book will need a complete rewrite once I’m finished with book #2, because I’ve since developed and changed a lot of stuff, and I have many new interesting ideas for a more fleshed out version of the first book. Still, the fanfic version is available online, so if you’d like to read it, you can find it here. You’ll get a pretty good idea of the general story and the characters, but keep in mind that it’s super outdated and will be very different after my rewrite!
For reference, this is the list of books that I’ve planned (and titled) so far, so you can keep up with what book of my series I’m talking about at any given point:
I - Amnesia: Memoirs
II - Amnesia: Renaissance
III - Amnesia: Voyage
IV - Amnesia: Noir
V - Amnesia: Encore
VI - Amnesia: Rogue
So what I’m doing right now with this project is revisions. Uuuuggghhhhh. Yes, that’s right, I’m stuck in revision hell. I’ve not even finished the first draft of Renaissance yet (I know, sacrilege, writing blasphemy, don’t start your damn edits until you’ve finished your draft dumbass), but I had some pretty major changes to make, changes so big that it would be a waste of time and effort to go on drafting without implementing them first. Mainly the changes are surrounding 1) a change of ages of my main cast (I aged many characters up a few years), and 2) changing and figuring out the specifics of the illness which my MC’s sister, Hazel, is afflicted with. She’s not such a major character in Renaissance, but she plays a big role in Memoirs, and since I had all these new ideas for the rewrite of that, I wanted to implement the ripple effects in the second book so it wouldn’t be too much of a hassle to edit later when Renaissance is a finished 3-400k first draft lmao (I have a lot of words okay?). These changes mostly affect the early chapters of my book - chapters I wrote about three years ago, which means that these early chapters really need a face-lift. In addition to the age and illness change, I wanna revise the first five chapters by cutting the fluff and tightening up the beginning so we get to the action a tiny bit faster. Adding to the fact that these early chapters are three years old, the prose also needs an almost complete rewrite. So long story short, all of the edits are taking a long ass time, and I’m not having a good time lmao. Doesn’t help that I had to stop drafting right at one of the juiciest scenes in my book?!?!? (that’s a lie, it gets juicier, but I was just getting to the real good stuff yanno?)
(Side note: for someone who said that I’d keep this short, it sure turned out long lmao. I just have too many damn words.)
Chapters edited: 2/16 (working on 3 right now and it’s an effin’ pain)
Current total word count: 120,591
Current total chapter count: 17 (the number will go down to 16 once I finish the revisions, as I’m merging two chapters)
Look at all the dumb shit I still have to edit for chapter 3. Look at it.
Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Art
Man, I’ve been doing a lot of artwork recently, and by a lot, I don’t mean that I’ve finished any.
I think I’ve been focused on developing my actual drawing skills rather than making finished illustrations, because I’ve been so overwhelmed with inspiration and I’ve wanted to try out drawing a bunch of different motives, so my mind is on a lot of different art projects at once, and I’m making baby steps of progress on each of them because I just wanna do everything lmao. I should probably take a step back and settle on one thing at a time, but at the same time, I feel like this is working for me because I’m so inspired and motivated and super excited for every single art piece; I don’t feel myself losing interest in any of them, in fact I just feel like my switching between different artworks keeps every piece fresh and interesting for me, yanno?
So here’s one thing that I’ve been slowly chipping away at for the past few months. I’m drawing a full body group picture of my main cast from Renaissance!
I’ve drawn the anatomy sketches of all the male characters (though I’m debating whether I should add some others), and now I’m adding the female characters one by one, so these are not all of the characters yet. But man, I just love seeing the characters side by side? The variety in their body language, body types and heights is just so interesting to look at, and it’ll be even better once I get around to actually adding their facial features, expressions, hair, attire, and then colouring them as well omg! I’m a sucker for this kind of thing, blame it on @juliajm15 and her amazing diverse character designs.
It’s gonna be a huge picture with a lot of characters, and I’m stoked for it!! This is a piece which I hope I’ll be able to show ya’ll the progress of bit by bit in every few updates. (also, if you feel somewhat familiar with some of my characters, you’re welcome to make guesses at who’s who (; )
Another project I’m working on is making official character portraits of my main cast (and possibly minor characters as well). I just think it’s nice to have official portraits as reference for anyone who’d like to see what the characters look like, and also for myself for whenever I need to refresh the specific features and expression of each character. It’s just a nice thing that satiates my very Type A personality lmao!
So the characters above are Owen Wright (to the left) , Daniel’s puppy bff with the fluffy hair, and then from left to right I’m colouring the portraits of the Armstrong siblings: Caleb, Caitlyn and Tristan. Their dad is a duke! n.n Caleb is the oldest, Caitlyn the youngest, and Tristan is the bland middle child. He’s a little brat LOL but I still love him.
Also, due to this glorious reference I found, I finally figured out how to draw Daniel. Bless this model, I never knew I wanted Daniel to have big puffy lips, but apparently I do.
He looks actually nice now? Which is nice? I’m amazed. Also his hair? I can never draw his hair, but this looks nice so yay? Also, I dunno why I never draw clothes on him, I guess I’m just lazy lol, but he’s gonna need to wear clothes for the official character portrait soooo... That’s a thing I’m gonna have to do.
Now that I’ve figured out his features, it’s gonna be fun to remodel all his family members accordingly. I sense that he’ll have gotten those cute puffy lips from his mum meheheheh.
I also did some Disney fanart of my two favourite Disney ladies; Esmeralda and Kida <3
I actually never really draw fanart any more, it’s been yeeeaaaars since I did, and when I used to do it, I was always very particular about staying as true to the original art style as possible. But now that I’ve spent the past couple years focusing on developing my own art style, I actually decided not to care about that so much and just draw the characters the way I’m used to drawing my own, and lo and behold - it looks pretty accurate to the Disney style?? I assumed that the characters would end up looking very different, but other than the eyes being smaller I feel like they look the exact same lmao. It’s interesting to me, because even when I used to do fanart, I usually did so of Japanese art and manga, not of Disney or any other western art. Also, I don’t consider my own style very Disney, but it pleases me a lot that the characters look so much like themselves even in my art style! The most important thing to me is to capture the essence of the character anyway, so any fan can recognise the character they love so much n.n
So that’s about it for this round! I’ve been working on other things as well, but I’d rather not disclose them to the public just yet - perhaps later, when I’ve made more progress, or (gasp!) actually finished something!! Bahahah, with the many things I’m working on, hell will freeze over before that day comes. *cries*
Youtube
I’m adding this Youtube section because, in addition to writing and doing artwork, I also like to record vocal covers (mainly of kpop songs, but I’ll do anything I’m in the mood for at any given point), aaaaand as of today I'm gonna be uploading speedpaints as well! Which is probably good since I don’t upload my covers nearly as often as I finish them lmao.
I’ve not uploaded any new covers recently (though I really should, I do have some covers lying around on my laptop mwerp), but I’m gonna list a couple of my favourite covers I have on my channel here so you can take a listen if you’d like!
youtube
youtube
youtube
And today I uploaded my very first speedpaint to my channel, so check that out if you’re interested in that sort of stuff! It’s the process of my Christmas portrait piece for Serena. I aim to be more consistent with uploads since I have a few unedited recordings lying around, so keep an eye out for that!
youtube
If you’ve read this far, thank you for sticking around and taking a look at my work, even if it’s only in WIP form. I wanted to start doing these updates because I’ve been watching my friends do them for a long time, and I always love reading their writing updates; they motivate me so much to get working on my own stuff, and I just wanna be able to perhaps do something similar for anyone else who’s watching me out there. So thank you sincerely to @coffeeandcalligraphy, @sarahkelsiwrites and @shaelinwrites for sharing your process with the world and being such an inspiration to me and many others, I love seeing you all make progress on your own projects <3
So that was all for this round, I hope you guys enjoyed a little sneak peek into what I’ve been working on! Until next time, folks!
#Amnesia the dark descent#disney#the hunchback of notre dame#atlantis the lost empire#kpop#update#personal#memoirs#renaissance#voyage#noir#encore#rogue#art wip#writing wip#daniel james wilkinson#owen wright#original character#friends#nine muses#sistar#aoa#snsd
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The Massive Difference Between 'Buy Local' And 'Local Buy' ... How Mayor Mullet Has Played The Townsville Business Community For Mugs.
Jenny Hill has traded on a trick of language to fool Townsville into thinking she is a champion for local workers and business, when the exact opposite is the case. It all revolves around the Local Government Association of Queenslands business arm called Local Buy and it is a deliberate play on words to line the coffers of the LGAQ. As The Pie reports, this one looks murky indeed. Also, the Townsville Bulletin goes beyond beyond parody, with one of their biggest side-splitting bungles yet and overall, it was a week you couldnt make up unless of course, youre the Bulletin. And is rebel councillor Paul The Angry Ant Jacob shaping up to take on The Mullet well, he may well have delusions of popularity and adequacy for a tilt in 2020 but there will be one powerful group that will try to block him. Also, the funniest comment on a news story this week comes from the most unlikely place and by popular demand, our regular pictorial gallery from Trumpistan. But first The shared thought-fart of the week belongs to One Notions P Hanson and the Katteronics R Katter. No sooner had Hanson quavered tremulously over the radio that people on the dole should be put to work catching cane toads at ten cents a pop, than Katter jumped on this creaky bandwagon and and upped the ante.
Bob Katter (right). Columnist James Jeffrey once wrote the Bob uses words like a cliff in Norway uses lemmings, and during the week, the member for Kennedy obliged with proof when he gurgled, giggled, sneered and croaked out his proposal that kids should catch the toads for 40 cents a time and be armed with air rifles to get the job done. It all makes one think that both Hanson and Katter are still smarting from their latest rejection letters from The Mensa Society, but the ever-practical Bentley thinks no matter how the creatures are caught, there might be a bit of a flaw in the idea.
Gosh, kids could be recruited under the banner of The Toady Army oh, hang on, maybe not, Townsville City councillors might sue for copyright. Is The LGAQs Nice Little Earner LOCAL BUY Costing Townsville A Motza? Some well credentialed business folks around town at increasingly frustrated with the little-understood Queensland Local Government Associations business arm Buy Local. And on the face of what two well-placed identities have told The Pie, the whole set-up looks ripe for rorts of all sorts, even progressing to very serious corruption unless proper transparency is in place. First this landed in the Nests inbox from a respected and successful Townsville businessman. Just wanted to highlighta program that shows that Mayor Mullet cannot only stuff Townsville as Mayor, she is also doing it as a Director of LGAQ against local businesses who payrent/rates and employ people.Townsville City Council is among those Queensland Local Councils using LGAQ Local Buy to avoid going to tender locally, allowing them toappoint out of town contractors with the LGAQ taking a cut (understood to be 10% of any contract, which of course is just added on to what the cost would otherwise be). Townsville businesses who were previously and successfully supplying services to Council have lost out under this scheme with many being forced to the business and had to put off staff. Any complaints about the dire situation made to Richard The Screaming Midget Beckett (no longer with the council met with threats that they would be locked out of any Council tenders in the future all under the culture from the Impailer and Mayor Mullet . To be an approved Local buy supplier you have to apply and I think pay an amount to be approved and there is a period of 5 years in which other similar other local businesses cant even apply. Momentum for change must be building as this excerpt from a letter from Local Government Minister Stirling Hinchcliffe indicates, after he received a petition complaining about the situation.
Also, has anyone questioned the $400k yearly service agreement between T.C.C . and the LGAQ and does the Mullet disclose her Directors fees from LGAQ ? As a LGAQ director, Jenny Hill, pops into her purse $31,000 p.a ta very muchly. Under the circumstances, that could be seen as blood money, since she must know the hardship this state-wide legalised rort is costing Townsvilles well-being. The Nest has received a number of complaints about Local Buy, but until this week, The Pie didnt have a coherent idea of what was happening so to get an independent assessment, The Magpie asked a business professional well versed in both business and LG matters to give this over-view. Given the current climate of spite and uncertainty, the person asked to remain anonymous. Local Buy is flawed in many aspects, even if one were to concede that its creation was well intentioned.Lets give them the benefit of the doubt to start with procurement can be complex and costly. Good procurement practice (eg. due diligence, evaluation requiring technical expertise etc) could be provided as a shared service, so that smaller organisations can in effect benefit from the capabilities of a larger organisation able to hire the appropriately skilled personnel. Theres also the prospect of negotiating better aggregate rates on the basis of aggregated volume. Thats the theory. The reality is that it is nowhere near this. Im not sure about the 5-year protection racket claim, but I do know that getting on the list involves not much more than paying some fees and ticking some boxes. This means a local council is more or less free to then pick and choose from the list, subject to the requirements of the LG Act. Magpie note: This means that the TCC can choose from a list based solely on price, which often means true locals cannot compete. This raises a moral question of whether it is more desirable to pay perhaps a bit more locally and materially contribute to a more vibrant local economy than to simply save some money because outside organisations that make no real contributions to our city. And it is this part of the system that is clearly open to corrupt influences. The Pie knows of none, but its an open invitation to it. Local Buy of course takes a Commission, from memory 10%, from registered suppliers when they win work, so in the end the potential benefits of savings arent materialised. Suppliers actually add the commission in. Theres also real doubt as to whether the Local Buy organisation actually has any real procurement capability. As a result, the tendency is for increasingly standardised or vanilla offerings, because thats the nature of generalised procedures run by people with limited specialisation and knowledge of local requirements or specialist areas eg, technology. Local Buy is a misnomer, of course. It neither compels nor guarantees procurement by a local authority from suppliers located within this authoritys area. Having said that, what goes to constituting local is never actually an easy question to answer, which makes a mockery of the entire buy local trope. One other thing on the Local Buy (and council procurement in general): theres a category called standing offer arrangement. This is basically a set of approved rates for services / products that a council can basically go back to time after time, without going out to tender. In theory, not a bad thing for pencils, paper clips and such like but as is always the case in procurement easily abused or at the very least, mis-used. The Magpie thanks the author for that succinct summary. It would certainly appear that we are being dudded one way or the other, but two things raise the Magpies curiosity: what do we get for our $400k annual contribution to the LGAQ? And noted in hindsight, just as this Local Buy system was being introduced, Mayor Mullet started dropping in the odd buy local slogan the timing appears to havde been there to fool people when they started hearing about local buy. Low level chicanery at its worst, spread about at the very time it now appears the council Jenny Hill heads was doing exactly the opposite. For Jenny Hill to trumpet the buy local cry is the height of hypocrisy, anyway. One of the very first acts she did when first elected mayor was to buy her new mayoral car (a top of the line Holden at around $70-$80,000) IN BRISBANE AND STIFFED THE RATEPAYERS TO HAVE IT SHIPPED HERE. And why was this? Because she had had a previous fight with Tony Ireland of TI Holden about repairs her previous vehicle, which she had mildly pranged into a gutter _ Ireland point blank refused her request to illegally mark it down as an accident insurance claim, which it clearly wasnt. Even although the Ireland company agreed to match the Brisbane price, Jenny Hill went ahead with the Brisbane deal anyway. Shes a sweet piece of work sometimes.
So if youre ever thinking if its true that local business people are fearful of spiteful retribution if they disagree with this civic leader, just keep that in mind. And Heres An Interesting Thought Wonder if Local Buy had anything to do with the controversial choice of pipe for the new Burdekin line, and did Local Buytb have anything to do with the pipeline jobs that went to Adelaide in stead of the promised boon to Townsville? Just askin. ya know. Yes The Astonisher Has Gone Beyond Parody The satirists lot is not a happy one lately. I mean, how do you make fun of something like the Bulletin that is so unintentionally crazy-funny to start with? Is this a secret plot to spike The Magpies guns? Last Tuesday, this appeared on page 16 as the editorial page of the Townsville Bulletin.
This is a stupendous blunder in a Townsville publication, that through their typical technical ineptness, the hard copy paper had published THE CAIRNS POST EDITORIAL PAGE the community voice (supposedly) of any newspaper. The editorial was of bugger all interest here, as well as being pretty stupid, anyway. It even had the Cairns deputy iditor signing it under the Townsville Bulletin masthead.
There was a time when this bit of prize fuckwittery wouldve caused an uproar, given the sensitive feelings between the two cities, but it appears weve been bludgeoned into not caring about the Bulletin anyway. Honestly, if it were not for the circle-jerk leadership of this city, the mayor and the head of Townsville Enterprise would be so incensed by this particular A community without a responsible newspaper is like a beautiful woman with only one eye (apologies to Brillat-Savarin). But still the harmless laughs kept coming. There was this story
which included this quote from one of the ladies of the night about southern blow-in blow-job competition on the streets: Theres false advertising, they send out a photo of a really hot looking chick and when they get there its some frumpy number. The girls have had a gutful of it This has been brewing for ages. Yknow, Thd Magpie thinks the lady might have a point. What sort of deceptive, conniving, immoral low-life would stoop to such trickery. Bet it would never happen in the Townsville Bulletin, would it? Huh, what? oh, oops.
But even when credibility-destroying cock-ups are right before their eyes, they still get into the paper. One should feel sorry for a decent old-time journo like Tony Raggatt, having his pic plastered between these clearly conflicting claims (the list clearly being nothing to with him).
But The Astonisher makes it easy to err take the piss.
This reeks of wreaking havoc on the language. Is The Angry Ant About To Up The Ante?
Paul Jacob Paul Jacob knows a cushy number when he sees one he is after all a Townsville City councillor. But it would seem our man is a tad more ambitious. The Ant broke ranks against Mayor Mullets Adani airstrip rort, conveniently just before he made an abortive run for state as a Labor-aligned but not endorsed candidate. Ever since, he has been regarded as a rebel ever since among the council sheeple and certainly by head shepherd Jennifer. So when he was front-paged in todays Astonisher
calling for an easing of water restrictions, many a pundit including The Pie, immediately assumed this was the signal for a Jacob joust for the top office in Walker Street. And that will be tricky. Unless Mayor Mullet abdicates and retires to malta, or runs on a Labor senate ticket her dearest wish but said not be shared by those who could make it so Clr Jacob will come under some intense pressure and even be flattered with promises of future glory by the Labor Party. Because despite her simpering shy denials of being a Labor mayor, Jenny Hill is, and is seen as, just that, and mainly by Labor itself. The party back room boys reckon mayor is as far as shes going, so they wouldnt rock what they see as a returnable vote boat in local government in March 2020. They know poor old Dolan Hayes will need Ashley and Martin soon with all the hair-tearing last thing the already beleaguered mayor needs is a Labor split ticket. But trust the Bulletin to come galumphing on to this particular scene with a few editorial bromides, but the best being this hilarious piece of total unselfawareness in an iditorial, which clearly is not Astonisher editorial policy.
Take your own advice, dearie. But Does The Pie Detect A Sly Dissension In The Senior Ranks At The Paper? Although The Pie doubts the feeling is mutual, he has great respect for the old-style work and values of John Ando Anderson he offers a very readable weekly service to the valuable rural readership of the paper, which clearly involves actual field work, and not just a few phone calls or, heaven forbid, lazy Facebook trolling. Now, Ando is nothing if not a steadfastly loyal News Ltd man; he has reason to be, the company spared no expense successfully defending him against spurious charge brought by the DPP over a jail interview almost 20 years ago. But The Pie couldnt help wonder if he wasnt trying to get a subtle message into the editors ear when writing today about Townsvilles landscape of words, waffle and impossible dreams.
Gotta love that line Pep talks are good for morale, but in the end, they start to sound like the boy crying wolf. And that, Ando, described PRECISELY the Bulletin editorial policy. very funny. Clever too, if The Pie is right. Pop in and have a chat to , will you? For all of us. Ghosts Of Iditors Past:Theres A Reason Hes Called Typo Gleeson
Typo Gleeson leaving an unsuccessful job interview as editor of Tailor & Cutter magazine. If you believe Sky Newss squeak fest hosted by Peter Typo Gleeson (sorry, only kidding) you might think David Crisafulli is returning to town for a special job and the head of TEL has changed her name.During the week, ww were treated too a hindenberg of hot air when Lil Patty OCallaghan and state opposition pollie Kid Crisafulli fielded a number of Dorothy Dixers from Typo. But one would think it was Typo in charge of the on-screen titling.
And when they got around to realising their mistake, in typical Typo fashion, they got that wrong too.
And Another Thing .. Best comment of the week goes to the bloke who replied to a totally embarrassing piece of nonesense in the paper about whether we are a friendly city. He suggested that of course we are we even wave to you from the roof of the Cleveland Detention Centre as you drive in from the airport. Luv it! Just what such a space-waste story deserved. Finally Its Been Another week of Wall-To-Wall umm .. Wall And we start with Mexico announcing the obvious
A Final Dad Joke (Well, Worked As A Granddad Joke)
Oh dear sorry. .. Thats it for another week, were off and running for 2019, its promising to be a cracker. There are a wider variety of folks taking to comments of late, keep it up, some are thoughtful, some hilarious, so entertain and be entertained. And if you have anything left over from the festive season, a donation to support The Magpies Nest will be of great assistance, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/the-massive-difference-between-buy-local-and-local-buy-how-mayor-mullet-has-played-the-townsville-business-community-for-mugs/
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Text
The Massive Difference Between 'Buy Local' And 'Local Buy' ... How Mayor Mullet Has Played The Townsville Business Community For Mugs.
Jenny Hill has traded on a trick of language to fool Townsville into thinking she is a champion for local workers and business, when the exact opposite is the case. It all revolves around the Local Government Association of Queenslands business arm called Local Buy and it is a deliberate play on words to line the coffers of the LGAQ. As The Pie reports, this one looks murky indeed. Also, the Townsville Bulletin goes beyond beyond parody, with one of their biggest side-splitting bungles yet and overall, it was a week you couldnt make up unless of course, youre the Bulletin. And is rebel councillor Paul The Angry Ant Jacob shaping up to take on The Mullet well, he may well have delusions of popularity and adequacy for a tilt in 2020 but there will be one powerful group that will try to block him. Also, the funniest comment on a news story this week comes from the most unlikely place and by popular demand, our regular pictorial gallery from Trumpistan. But first The shared thought-fart of the week belongs to One Notions P Hanson and the Katteronics R Katter. No sooner had Hanson quavered tremulously over the radio that people on the dole should be put to work catching cane toads at ten cents a pop, than Katter jumped on this creaky bandwagon and and upped the ante.
Bob Katter (right). Columnist James Jeffrey once wrote the Bob uses words like a cliff in Norway uses lemmings, and during the week, the member for Kennedy obliged with proof when he gurgled, giggled, sneered and croaked out his proposal that kids should catch the toads for 40 cents a time and be armed with air rifles to get the job done. It all makes one think that both Hanson and Katter are still smarting from their latest rejection letters from The Mensa Society, but the ever-practical Bentley thinks no matter how the creatures are caught, there might be a bit of a flaw in the idea.
Gosh, kids could be recruited under the banner of The Toady Army oh, hang on, maybe not, Townsville City councillors might sue for copyright. Is The LGAQs Nice Little Earner LOCAL BUY Costing Townsville A Motza? Some well credentialed business folks around town at increasingly frustrated with the little-understood Queensland Local Government Associations business arm Buy Local. And on the face of what two well-placed identities have told The Pie, the whole set-up looks ripe for rorts of all sorts, even progressing to very serious corruption unless proper transparency is in place. First this landed in the Nests inbox from a respected and successful Townsville businessman. Just wanted to highlighta program that shows that Mayor Mullet cannot only stuff Townsville as Mayor, she is also doing it as a Director of LGAQ against local businesses who payrent/rates and employ people.Townsville City Council is among those Queensland Local Councils using LGAQ Local Buy to avoid going to tender locally, allowing them toappoint out of town contractors with the LGAQ taking a cut (understood to be 10% of any contract, which of course is just added on to what the cost would otherwise be). Townsville businesses who were previously and successfully supplying services to Council have lost out under this scheme with many being forced to the business and had to put off staff. Any complaints about the dire situation made to Richard The Screaming Midget Beckett (no longer with the council met with threats that they would be locked out of any Council tenders in the future all under the culture from the Impailer and Mayor Mullet . To be an approved Local buy supplier you have to apply and I think pay an amount to be approved and there is a period of 5 years in which other similar other local businesses cant even apply. Momentum for change must be building as this excerpt from a letter from Local Government Minister Stirling Hinchcliffe indicates, after he received a petition complaining about the situation.
Also, has anyone questioned the $400k yearly service agreement between T.C.C . and the LGAQ and does the Mullet disclose her Directors fees from LGAQ ? As a LGAQ director, Jenny Hill, pops into her purse $31,000 p.a ta very muchly. Under the circumstances, that could be seen as blood money, since she must know the hardship this state-wide legalised rort is costing Townsvilles well-being. The Nest has received a number of complaints about Local Buy, but until this week, The Pie didnt have a coherent idea of what was happening so to get an independent assessment, The Magpie asked a business professional well versed in both business and LG matters to give this over-view. Given the current climate of spite and uncertainty, the person asked to remain anonymous. Local Buy is flawed in many aspects, even if one were to concede that its creation was well intentioned.Lets give them the benefit of the doubt to start with procurement can be complex and costly. Good procurement practice (eg. due diligence, evaluation requiring technical expertise etc) could be provided as a shared service, so that smaller organisations can in effect benefit from the capabilities of a larger organisation able to hire the appropriately skilled personnel. Theres also the prospect of negotiating better aggregate rates on the basis of aggregated volume. Thats the theory. The reality is that it is nowhere near this. Im not sure about the 5-year protection racket claim, but I do know that getting on the list involves not much more than paying some fees and ticking some boxes. This means a local council is more or less free to then pick and choose from the list, subject to the requirements of the LG Act. Magpie note: This means that the TCC can choose from a list based solely on price, which often means true locals cannot compete. This raises a moral question of whether it is more desirable to pay perhaps a bit more locally and materially contribute to a more vibrant local economy than to simply save some money because outside organisations that make no real contributions to our city. And it is this part of the system that is clearly open to corrupt influences. The Pie knows of none, but its an open invitation to it. Local Buy of course takes a Commission, from memory 10%, from registered suppliers when they win work, so in the end the potential benefits of savings arent materialised. Suppliers actually add the commission in. Theres also real doubt as to whether the Local Buy organisation actually has any real procurement capability. As a result, the tendency is for increasingly standardised or vanilla offerings, because thats the nature of generalised procedures run by people with limited specialisation and knowledge of local requirements or specialist areas eg, technology. Local Buy is a misnomer, of course. It neither compels nor guarantees procurement by a local authority from suppliers located within this authoritys area. Having said that, what goes to constituting local is never actually an easy question to answer, which makes a mockery of the entire buy local trope. One other thing on the Local Buy (and council procurement in general): theres a category called standing offer arrangement. This is basically a set of approved rates for services / products that a council can basically go back to time after time, without going out to tender. In theory, not a bad thing for pencils, paper clips and such like but as is always the case in procurement easily abused or at the very least, mis-used. The Magpie thanks the author for that succinct summary. It would certainly appear that we are being dudded one way or the other, but two things raise the Magpies curiosity: what do we get for our $400k annual contribution to the LGAQ? And noted in hindsight, just as this Local Buy system was being introduced, Mayor Mullet started dropping in the odd buy local slogan the timing appears to havde been there to fool people when they started hearing about local buy. Low level chicanery at its worst, spread about at the very time it now appears the council Jenny Hill heads was doing exactly the opposite. For Jenny Hill to trumpet the buy local cry is the height of hypocrisy, anyway. One of the very first acts she did when first elected mayor was to buy her new mayoral car (a top of the line Holden at around $70-$80,000) IN BRISBANE AND STIFFED THE RATEPAYERS TO HAVE IT SHIPPED HERE. And why was this? Because she had had a previous fight with Tony Ireland of TI Holden about repairs her previous vehicle, which she had mildly pranged into a gutter _ Ireland point blank refused her request to illegally mark it down as an accident insurance claim, which it clearly wasnt. Even although the Ireland company agreed to match the Brisbane price, Jenny Hill went ahead with the Brisbane deal anyway. Shes a sweet piece of work sometimes.
So if youre ever thinking if its true that local business people are fearful of spiteful retribution if they disagree with this civic leader, just keep that in mind. And Heres An Interesting Thought Wonder if Local Buy had anything to do with the controversial choice of pipe for the new Burdekin line, and did Local Buytb have anything to do with the pipeline jobs that went to Adelaide in stead of the promised boon to Townsville? Just askin. ya know. Yes The Astonisher Has Gone Beyond Parody The satirists lot is not a happy one lately. I mean, how do you make fun of something like the Bulletin that is so unintentionally crazy-funny to start with? Is this a secret plot to spike The Magpies guns? Last Tuesday, this appeared on page 16 as the editorial page of the Townsville Bulletin.
This is a stupendous blunder in a Townsville publication, that through their typical technical ineptness, the hard copy paper had published THE CAIRNS POST EDITORIAL PAGE the community voice (supposedly) of any newspaper. The editorial was of bugger all interest here, as well as being pretty stupid, anyway. It even had the Cairns deputy iditor signing it under the Townsville Bulletin masthead.
There was a time when this bit of prize fuckwittery wouldve caused an uproar, given the sensitive feelings between the two cities, but it appears weve been bludgeoned into not caring about the Bulletin anyway. Honestly, if it were not for the circle-jerk leadership of this city, the mayor and the head of Townsville Enterprise would be so incensed by this particular A community without a responsible newspaper is like a beautiful woman with only one eye (apologies to Brillat-Savarin). But still the harmless laughs kept coming. There was this story
which included this quote from one of the ladies of the night about southern blow-in blow-job competition on the streets: Theres false advertising, they send out a photo of a really hot looking chick and when they get there its some frumpy number. The girls have had a gutful of it This has been brewing for ages. Yknow, Thd Magpie thinks the lady might have a point. What sort of deceptive, conniving, immoral low-life would stoop to such trickery. Bet it would never happen in the Townsville Bulletin, would it? Huh, what? oh, oops.
But even when credibility-destroying cock-ups are right before their eyes, they still get into the paper. One should feel sorry for a decent old-time journo like Tony Raggatt, having his pic plastered between these clearly conflicting claims (the list clearly being nothing to with him).
But The Astonisher makes it easy to err take the piss.
This reeks of wreaking havoc on the language. Is The Angry Ant About To Up The Ante?
Paul Jacob Paul Jacob knows a cushy number when he sees one he is after all a Townsville City councillor. But it would seem our man is a tad more ambitious. The Ant broke ranks against Mayor Mullets Adani airstrip rort, conveniently just before he made an abortive run for state as a Labor-aligned but not endorsed candidate. Ever since, he has been regarded as a rebel ever since among the council sheeple and certainly by head shepherd Jennifer. So when he was front-paged in todays Astonisher
calling for an easing of water restrictions, many a pundit including The Pie, immediately assumed this was the signal for a Jacob joust for the top office in Walker Street. And that will be tricky. Unless Mayor Mullet abdicates and retires to malta, or runs on a Labor senate ticket her dearest wish but said not be shared by those who could make it so Clr Jacob will come under some intense pressure and even be flattered with promises of future glory by the Labor Party. Because despite her simpering shy denials of being a Labor mayor, Jenny Hill is, and is seen as, just that, and mainly by Labor itself. The party back room boys reckon mayor is as far as shes going, so they wouldnt rock what they see as a returnable vote boat in local government in March 2020. They know poor old Dolan Hayes will need Ashley and Martin soon with all the hair-tearing last thing the already beleaguered mayor needs is a Labor split ticket. But trust the Bulletin to come galumphing on to this particular scene with a few editorial bromides, but the best being this hilarious piece of total unselfawareness in an iditorial, which clearly is not Astonisher editorial policy.
Take your own advice, dearie. But Does The Pie Detect A Sly Dissension In The Senior Ranks At The Paper? Although The Pie doubts the feeling is mutual, he has great respect for the old-style work and values of John Ando Anderson he offers a very readable weekly service to the valuable rural readership of the paper, which clearly involves actual field work, and not just a few phone calls or, heaven forbid, lazy Facebook trolling. Now, Ando is nothing if not a steadfastly loyal News Ltd man; he has reason to be, the company spared no expense successfully defending him against spurious charge brought by the DPP over a jail interview almost 20 years ago. But The Pie couldnt help wonder if he wasnt trying to get a subtle message into the editors ear when writing today about Townsvilles landscape of words, waffle and impossible dreams.
Gotta love that line Pep talks are good for morale, but in the end, they start to sound like the boy crying wolf. And that, Ando, described PRECISELY the Bulletin editorial policy. very funny. Clever too, if The Pie is right. Pop in and have a chat to , will you? For all of us. Ghosts Of Iditors Past:Theres A Reason Hes Called Typo Gleeson
Typo Gleeson leaving an unsuccessful job interview as editor of Tailor & Cutter magazine. If you believe Sky Newss squeak fest hosted by Peter Typo Gleeson (sorry, only kidding) you might think David Crisafulli is returning to town for a special job and the head of TEL has changed her name.During the week, ww were treated too a hindenberg of hot air when Lil Patty OCallaghan and state opposition pollie Kid Crisafulli fielded a number of Dorothy Dixers from Typo. But one would think it was Typo in charge of the on-screen titling.
And when they got around to realising their mistake, in typical Typo fashion, they got that wrong too.
And Another Thing .. Best comment of the week goes to the bloke who replied to a totally embarrassing piece of nonesense in the paper about whether we are a friendly city. He suggested that of course we are we even wave to you from the roof of the Cleveland Detention Centre as you drive in from the airport. Luv it! Just what such a space-waste story deserved. Finally Its Been Another week of Wall-To-Wall umm .. Wall And we start with Mexico announcing the obvious
A Final Dad Joke (Well, Worked As A Granddad Joke)
Oh dear sorry. .. Thats it for another week, were off and running for 2019, its promising to be a cracker. There are a wider variety of folks taking to comments of late, keep it up, some are thoughtful, some hilarious, so entertain and be entertained. And if you have anything left over from the festive season, a donation to support The Magpies Nest will be of great assistance, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/the-massive-difference-between-buy-local-and-local-buy-how-mayor-mullet-has-played-the-townsville-business-community-for-mugs/
0 notes
Text
The Massive Difference Between 'Buy Local' And 'Local Buy' ... How Mayor Mullet Has Played The Townsville Business Community For Mugs.
Jenny Hill has traded on a trick of language to fool Townsville into thinking she is a champion for local workers and business, when the exact opposite is the case. It all revolves around the Local Government Association of Queenslands business arm called Local Buy and it is a deliberate play on words to line the coffers of the LGAQ. As The Pie reports, this one looks murky indeed. Also, the Townsville Bulletin goes beyond beyond parody, with one of their biggest side-splitting bungles yet and overall, it was a week you couldnt make up unless of course, youre the Bulletin. And is rebel councillor Paul The Angry Ant Jacob shaping up to take on The Mullet well, he may well have delusions of popularity and adequacy for a tilt in 2020 but there will be one powerful group that will try to block him. Also, the funniest comment on a news story this week comes from the most unlikely place and by popular demand, our regular pictorial gallery from Trumpistan. But first The shared thought-fart of the week belongs to One Notions P Hanson and the Katteronics R Katter. No sooner had Hanson quavered tremulously over the radio that people on the dole should be put to work catching cane toads at ten cents a pop, than Katter jumped on this creaky bandwagon and and upped the ante.
Bob Katter (right). Columnist James Jeffrey once wrote the Bob uses words like a cliff in Norway uses lemmings, and during the week, the member for Kennedy obliged with proof when he gurgled, giggled, sneered and croaked out his proposal that kids should catch the toads for 40 cents a time and be armed with air rifles to get the job done. It all makes one think that both Hanson and Katter are still smarting from their latest rejection letters from The Mensa Society, but the ever-practical Bentley thinks no matter how the creatures are caught, there might be a bit of a flaw in the idea.
Gosh, kids could be recruited under the banner of The Toady Army oh, hang on, maybe not, Townsville City councillors might sue for copyright. Is The LGAQs Nice Little Earner LOCAL BUY Costing Townsville A Motza? Some well credentialed business folks around town at increasingly frustrated with the little-understood Queensland Local Government Associations business arm Buy Local. And on the face of what two well-placed identities have told The Pie, the whole set-up looks ripe for rorts of all sorts, even progressing to very serious corruption unless proper transparency is in place. First this landed in the Nests inbox from a respected and successful Townsville businessman. Just wanted to highlighta program that shows that Mayor Mullet cannot only stuff Townsville as Mayor, she is also doing it as a Director of LGAQ against local businesses who payrent/rates and employ people.Townsville City Council is among those Queensland Local Councils using LGAQ Local Buy to avoid going to tender locally, allowing them toappoint out of town contractors with the LGAQ taking a cut (understood to be 10% of any contract, which of course is just added on to what the cost would otherwise be). Townsville businesses who were previously and successfully supplying services to Council have lost out under this scheme with many being forced to the business and had to put off staff. Any complaints about the dire situation made to Richard The Screaming Midget Beckett (no longer with the council met with threats that they would be locked out of any Council tenders in the future all under the culture from the Impailer and Mayor Mullet . To be an approved Local buy supplier you have to apply and I think pay an amount to be approved and there is a period of 5 years in which other similar other local businesses cant even apply. Momentum for change must be building as this excerpt from a letter from Local Government Minister Stirling Hinchcliffe indicates, after he received a petition complaining about the situation.
Also, has anyone questioned the $400k yearly service agreement between T.C.C . and the LGAQ and does the Mullet disclose her Directors fees from LGAQ ? As a LGAQ director, Jenny Hill, pops into her purse $31,000 p.a ta very muchly. Under the circumstances, that could be seen as blood money, since she must know the hardship this state-wide legalised rort is costing Townsvilles well-being. The Nest has received a number of complaints about Local Buy, but until this week, The Pie didnt have a coherent idea of what was happening so to get an independent assessment, The Magpie asked a business professional well versed in both business and LG matters to give this over-view. Given the current climate of spite and uncertainty, the person asked to remain anonymous. Local Buy is flawed in many aspects, even if one were to concede that its creation was well intentioned.Lets give them the benefit of the doubt to start with procurement can be complex and costly. Good procurement practice (eg. due diligence, evaluation requiring technical expertise etc) could be provided as a shared service, so that smaller organisations can in effect benefit from the capabilities of a larger organisation able to hire the appropriately skilled personnel. Theres also the prospect of negotiating better aggregate rates on the basis of aggregated volume. Thats the theory. The reality is that it is nowhere near this. Im not sure about the 5-year protection racket claim, but I do know that getting on the list involves not much more than paying some fees and ticking some boxes. This means a local council is more or less free to then pick and choose from the list, subject to the requirements of the LG Act. Magpie note: This means that the TCC can choose from a list based solely on price, which often means true locals cannot compete. This raises a moral question of whether it is more desirable to pay perhaps a bit more locally and materially contribute to a more vibrant local economy than to simply save some money because outside organisations that make no real contributions to our city. And it is this part of the system that is clearly open to corrupt influences. The Pie knows of none, but its an open invitation to it. Local Buy of course takes a Commission, from memory 10%, from registered suppliers when they win work, so in the end the potential benefits of savings arent materialised. Suppliers actually add the commission in. Theres also real doubt as to whether the Local Buy organisation actually has any real procurement capability. As a result, the tendency is for increasingly standardised or vanilla offerings, because thats the nature of generalised procedures run by people with limited specialisation and knowledge of local requirements or specialist areas eg, technology. Local Buy is a misnomer, of course. It neither compels nor guarantees procurement by a local authority from suppliers located within this authoritys area. Having said that, what goes to constituting local is never actually an easy question to answer, which makes a mockery of the entire buy local trope. One other thing on the Local Buy (and council procurement in general): theres a category called standing offer arrangement. This is basically a set of approved rates for services / products that a council can basically go back to time after time, without going out to tender. In theory, not a bad thing for pencils, paper clips and such like but as is always the case in procurement easily abused or at the very least, mis-used. The Magpie thanks the author for that succinct summary. It would certainly appear that we are being dudded one way or the other, but two things raise the Magpies curiosity: what do we get for our $400k annual contribution to the LGAQ? And noted in hindsight, just as this Local Buy system was being introduced, Mayor Mullet started dropping in the odd buy local slogan the timing appears to havde been there to fool people when they started hearing about local buy. Low level chicanery at its worst, spread about at the very time it now appears the council Jenny Hill heads was doing exactly the opposite. For Jenny Hill to trumpet the buy local cry is the height of hypocrisy, anyway. One of the very first acts she did when first elected mayor was to buy her new mayoral car (a top of the line Holden at around $70-$80,000) IN BRISBANE AND STIFFED THE RATEPAYERS TO HAVE IT SHIPPED HERE. And why was this? Because she had had a previous fight with Tony Ireland of TI Holden about repairs her previous vehicle, which she had mildly pranged into a gutter _ Ireland point blank refused her request to illegally mark it down as an accident insurance claim, which it clearly wasnt. Even although the Ireland company agreed to match the Brisbane price, Jenny Hill went ahead with the Brisbane deal anyway. Shes a sweet piece of work sometimes.
So if youre ever thinking if its true that local business people are fearful of spiteful retribution if they disagree with this civic leader, just keep that in mind. And Heres An Interesting Thought Wonder if Local Buy had anything to do with the controversial choice of pipe for the new Burdekin line, and did Local Buytb have anything to do with the pipeline jobs that went to Adelaide in stead of the promised boon to Townsville? Just askin. ya know. Yes The Astonisher Has Gone Beyond Parody The satirists lot is not a happy one lately. I mean, how do you make fun of something like the Bulletin that is so unintentionally crazy-funny to start with? Is this a secret plot to spike The Magpies guns? Last Tuesday, this appeared on page 16 as the editorial page of the Townsville Bulletin.
This is a stupendous blunder in a Townsville publication, that through their typical technical ineptness, the hard copy paper had published THE CAIRNS POST EDITORIAL PAGE the community voice (supposedly) of any newspaper. The editorial was of bugger all interest here, as well as being pretty stupid, anyway. It even had the Cairns deputy iditor signing it under the Townsville Bulletin masthead.
There was a time when this bit of prize fuckwittery wouldve caused an uproar, given the sensitive feelings between the two cities, but it appears weve been bludgeoned into not caring about the Bulletin anyway. Honestly, if it were not for the circle-jerk leadership of this city, the mayor and the head of Townsville Enterprise would be so incensed by this particular A community without a responsible newspaper is like a beautiful woman with only one eye (apologies to Brillat-Savarin). But still the harmless laughs kept coming. There was this story
which included this quote from one of the ladies of the night about southern blow-in blow-job competition on the streets: Theres false advertising, they send out a photo of a really hot looking chick and when they get there its some frumpy number. The girls have had a gutful of it This has been brewing for ages. Yknow, Thd Magpie thinks the lady might have a point. What sort of deceptive, conniving, immoral low-life would stoop to such trickery. Bet it would never happen in the Townsville Bulletin, would it? Huh, what? oh, oops.
But even when credibility-destroying cock-ups are right before their eyes, they still get into the paper. One should feel sorry for a decent old-time journo like Tony Raggatt, having his pic plastered between these clearly conflicting claims (the list clearly being nothing to with him).
But The Astonisher makes it easy to err take the piss.
This reeks of wreaking havoc on the language. Is The Angry Ant About To Up The Ante?
Paul Jacob Paul Jacob knows a cushy number when he sees one he is after all a Townsville City councillor. But it would seem our man is a tad more ambitious. The Ant broke ranks against Mayor Mullets Adani airstrip rort, conveniently just before he made an abortive run for state as a Labor-aligned but not endorsed candidate. Ever since, he has been regarded as a rebel ever since among the council sheeple and certainly by head shepherd Jennifer. So when he was front-paged in todays Astonisher
calling for an easing of water restrictions, many a pundit including The Pie, immediately assumed this was the signal for a Jacob joust for the top office in Walker Street. And that will be tricky. Unless Mayor Mullet abdicates and retires to malta, or runs on a Labor senate ticket her dearest wish but said not be shared by those who could make it so Clr Jacob will come under some intense pressure and even be flattered with promises of future glory by the Labor Party. Because despite her simpering shy denials of being a Labor mayor, Jenny Hill is, and is seen as, just that, and mainly by Labor itself. The party back room boys reckon mayor is as far as shes going, so they wouldnt rock what they see as a returnable vote boat in local government in March 2020. They know poor old Dolan Hayes will need Ashley and Martin soon with all the hair-tearing last thing the already beleaguered mayor needs is a Labor split ticket. But trust the Bulletin to come galumphing on to this particular scene with a few editorial bromides, but the best being this hilarious piece of total unselfawareness in an iditorial, which clearly is not Astonisher editorial policy.
Take your own advice, dearie. But Does The Pie Detect A Sly Dissension In The Senior Ranks At The Paper? Although The Pie doubts the feeling is mutual, he has great respect for the old-style work and values of John Ando Anderson he offers a very readable weekly service to the valuable rural readership of the paper, which clearly involves actual field work, and not just a few phone calls or, heaven forbid, lazy Facebook trolling. Now, Ando is nothing if not a steadfastly loyal News Ltd man; he has reason to be, the company spared no expense successfully defending him against spurious charge brought by the DPP over a jail interview almost 20 years ago. But The Pie couldnt help wonder if he wasnt trying to get a subtle message into the editors ear when writing today about Townsvilles landscape of words, waffle and impossible dreams.
Gotta love that line Pep talks are good for morale, but in the end, they start to sound like the boy crying wolf. And that, Ando, described PRECISELY the Bulletin editorial policy. very funny. Clever too, if The Pie is right. Pop in and have a chat to , will you? For all of us. Ghosts Of Iditors Past:Theres A Reason Hes Called Typo Gleeson
Typo Gleeson leaving an unsuccessful job interview as editor of Tailor & Cutter magazine. If you believe Sky Newss squeak fest hosted by Peter Typo Gleeson (sorry, only kidding) you might think David Crisafulli is returning to town for a special job and the head of TEL has changed her name.During the week, ww were treated too a hindenberg of hot air when Lil Patty OCallaghan and state opposition pollie Kid Crisafulli fielded a number of Dorothy Dixers from Typo. But one would think it was Typo in charge of the on-screen titling.
And when they got around to realising their mistake, in typical Typo fashion, they got that wrong too.
And Another Thing .. Best comment of the week goes to the bloke who replied to a totally embarrassing piece of nonesense in the paper about whether we are a friendly city. He suggested that of course we are we even wave to you from the roof of the Cleveland Detention Centre as you drive in from the airport. Luv it! Just what such a space-waste story deserved. Finally Its Been Another week of Wall-To-Wall umm .. Wall And we start with Mexico announcing the obvious
A Final Dad Joke (Well, Worked As A Granddad Joke)
Oh dear sorry. .. Thats it for another week, were off and running for 2019, its promising to be a cracker. There are a wider variety of folks taking to comments of late, keep it up, some are thoughtful, some hilarious, so entertain and be entertained. And if you have anything left over from the festive season, a donation to support The Magpies Nest will be of great assistance, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/the-massive-difference-between-buy-local-and-local-buy-how-mayor-mullet-has-played-the-townsville-business-community-for-mugs/
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The Massive Difference Between 'Buy Local' And 'Local Buy' ... How Mayor Mullet Has Played The Townsville Business Community For Mugs.
Jenny Hill has traded on a trick of language to fool Townsville into thinking she is a champion for local workers and business, when the exact opposite is the case. It all revolves around the Local Government Association of Queenslands business arm called Local Buy and it is a deliberate play on words to line the coffers of the LGAQ. As The Pie reports, this one looks murky indeed. Also, the Townsville Bulletin goes beyond beyond parody, with one of their biggest side-splitting bungles yet and overall, it was a week you couldnt make up unless of course, youre the Bulletin. And is rebel councillor Paul The Angry Ant Jacob shaping up to take on The Mullet well, he may well have delusions of popularity and adequacy for a tilt in 2020 but there will be one powerful group that will try to block him. Also, the funniest comment on a news story this week comes from the most unlikely place and by popular demand, our regular pictorial gallery from Trumpistan. But first The shared thought-fart of the week belongs to One Notions P Hanson and the Katteronics R Katter. No sooner had Hanson quavered tremulously over the radio that people on the dole should be put to work catching cane toads at ten cents a pop, than Katter jumped on this creaky bandwagon and and upped the ante. Bob Katter (right). Columnist James Jeffrey once wrote the Bob uses words like a cliff in Norway uses lemmings, and during the week, the member for Kennedy obliged with proof when he gurgled, giggled, sneered and croaked out his proposal that kids should catch the toads for 40 cents a time and be armed with air rifles to get the job done. It all makes one think that both Hanson and Katter are still smarting from their latest rejection letters from The Mensa Society, but the ever-practical Bentley thinks no matter how the creatures are caught, there might be a bit of a flaw in the idea. Gosh, kids could be recruited under the banner of The Toady Army oh, hang on, maybe not, Townsville City councillors might sue for copyright. Is The LGAQs Nice Little Earner LOCAL BUY Costing Townsville A Motza? Some well credentialed business folks around town at increasingly frustrated with the little-understood Queensland Local Government Associations business arm Buy Local. And on the face of what two well-placed identities have told The Pie, the whole set-up looks ripe for rorts of all sorts, even progressing to very serious corruption unless proper transparency is in place. First this landed in the Nests inbox from a respected and successful Townsville businessman. Just wanted to highlighta program that shows that Mayor Mullet cannot only stuff Townsville as Mayor, she is also doing it as a Director of LGAQ against local businesses who payrent/rates and employ people.Townsville City Council is among those Queensland Local Councils using LGAQ Local Buy to avoid going to tender locally, allowing them toappoint out of town contractors with the LGAQ taking a cut (understood to be 10% of any contract, which of course is just added on to what the cost would otherwise be). Townsville businesses who were previously and successfully supplying services to Council have lost out under this scheme with many being forced to the business and had to put off staff. Any complaints about the dire situation made to Richard The Screaming Midget Beckett (no longer with the council met with threats that they would be locked out of any Council tenders in the future all under the culture from the Impailer and Mayor Mullet . To be an approved Local buy supplier you have to apply and I think pay an amount to be approved and there is a period of 5 years in which other similar other local businesses cant even apply. Momentum for change must be building as this excerpt from a letter from Local Government Minister Stirling Hinchcliffe indicates, after he received a petition complaining about the situation. Also, has anyone questioned the $400k yearly service agreement between T.C.C . and the LGAQ and does the Mullet disclose her Directors fees from LGAQ ? As a LGAQ director, Jenny Hill, pops into her purse $31,000 p.a ta very muchly. Under the circumstances, that could be seen as blood money, since she must know the hardship this state-wide legalised rort is costing Townsvilles well-being. The Nest has received a number of complaints about Local Buy, but until this week, The Pie didnt have a coherent idea of what was happening so to get an independent assessment, The Magpie asked a business professional well versed in both business and LG matters to give this over-view. Given the current climate of spite and uncertainty, the person asked to remain anonymous. Local Buy is flawed in many aspects, even if one were to concede that its creation was well intentioned.Lets give them the benefit of the doubt to start with procurement can be complex and costly. Good procurement practice (eg. due diligence, evaluation requiring technical expertise etc) could be provided as a shared service, so that smaller organisations can in effect benefit from the capabilities of a larger organisation able to hire the appropriately skilled personnel. Theres also the prospect of negotiating better aggregate rates on the basis of aggregated volume. Thats the theory. The reality is that it is nowhere near this. Im not sure about the 5-year protection racket claim, but I do know that getting on the list involves not much more than paying some fees and ticking some boxes. This means a local council is more or less free to then pick and choose from the list, subject to the requirements of the LG Act. Magpie note: This means that the TCC can choose from a list based solely on price, which often means true locals cannot compete. This raises a moral question of whether it is more desirable to pay perhaps a bit more locally and materially contribute to a more vibrant local economy than to simply save some money because outside organisations that make no real contributions to our city. And it is this part of the system that is clearly open to corrupt influences. The Pie knows of none, but its an open invitation to it. Local Buy of course takes a Commission, from memory 10%, from registered suppliers when they win work, so in the end the potential benefits of savings arent materialised. Suppliers actually add the commission in. Theres also real doubt as to whether the Local Buy organisation actually has any real procurement capability. As a result, the tendency is for increasingly standardised or vanilla offerings, because thats the nature of generalised procedures run by people with limited specialisation and knowledge of local requirements or specialist areas eg, technology. Local Buy is a misnomer, of course. It neither compels nor guarantees procurement by a local authority from suppliers located within this authoritys area. Having said that, what goes to constituting local is never actually an easy question to answer, which makes a mockery of the entire buy local trope. One other thing on the Local Buy (and council procurement in general): theres a category called standing offer arrangement. This is basically a set of approved rates for services / products that a council can basically go back to time after time, without going out to tender. In theory, not a bad thing for pencils, paper clips and such like but as is always the case in procurement easily abused or at the very least, mis-used. The Magpie thanks the author for that succinct summary. It would certainly appear that we are being dudded one way or the other, but two things raise the Magpies curiosity: what do we get for our $400k annual contribution to the LGAQ? And noted in hindsight, just as this Local Buy system was being introduced, Mayor Mullet started dropping in the odd buy local slogan the timing appears to havde been there to fool people when they started hearing about local buy. Low level chicanery at its worst, spread about at the very time it now appears the council Jenny Hill heads was doing exactly the opposite. For Jenny Hill to trumpet the buy local cry is the height of hypocrisy, anyway. One of the very first acts she did when first elected mayor was to buy her new mayoral car (a top of the line Holden at around $70-$80,000) IN BRISBANE AND STIFFED THE RATEPAYERS TO HAVE IT SHIPPED HERE. And why was this? Because she had had a previous fight with Tony Ireland of TI Holden about repairs her previous vehicle, which she had mildly pranged into a gutter _ Ireland point blank refused her request to illegally mark it down as an accident insurance claim, which it clearly wasnt. Even although the Ireland company agreed to match the Brisbane price, Jenny Hill went ahead with the Brisbane deal anyway. Shes a sweet piece of work sometimes. So if youre ever thinking if its true that local business people are fearful of spiteful retribution if they disagree with this civic leader, just keep that in mind. And Heres An Interesting Thought Wonder if Local Buy had anything to do with the controversial choice of pipe for the new Burdekin line, and did Local Buytb have anything to do with the pipeline jobs that went to Adelaide in stead of the promised boon to Townsville? Just askin. ya know. Yes The Astonisher Has Gone Beyond Parody The satirists lot is not a happy one lately. I mean, how do you make fun of something like the Bulletin that is so unintentionally crazy-funny to start with? Is this a secret plot to spike The Magpies guns? Last Tuesday, this appeared on page 16 as the editorial page of the Townsville Bulletin. This is a stupendous blunder in a Townsville publication, that through their typical technical ineptness, the hard copy paper had published THE CAIRNS POST EDITORIAL PAGE the community voice (supposedly) of any newspaper. The editorial was of bugger all interest here, as well as being pretty stupid, anyway. It even had the Cairns deputy iditor signing it under the Townsville Bulletin masthead. There was a time when this bit of prize fuckwittery wouldve caused an uproar, given the sensitive feelings between the two cities, but it appears weve been bludgeoned into not caring about the Bulletin anyway. Honestly, if it were not for the circle-jerk leadership of this city, the mayor and the head of Townsville Enterprise would be so incensed by this particular A community without a responsible newspaper is like a beautiful woman with only one eye (apologies to Brillat-Savarin). But still the harmless laughs kept coming. There was this story which included this quote from one of the ladies of the night about southern blow-in blow-job competition on the streets: Theres false advertising, they send out a photo of a really hot looking chick and when they get there its some frumpy number. The girls have had a gutful of it This has been brewing for ages. Yknow, Thd Magpie thinks the lady might have a point. What sort of deceptive, conniving, immoral low-life would stoop to such trickery. Bet it would never happen in the Townsville Bulletin, would it? Huh, what? oh, oops. But even when credibility-destroying cock-ups are right before their eyes, they still get into the paper. One should feel sorry for a decent old-time journo like Tony Raggatt, having his pic plastered between these clearly conflicting claims (the list clearly being nothing to with him). But The Astonisher makes it easy to err take the piss. This reeks of wreaking havoc on the language. Is The Angry Ant About To Up The Ante? Paul Jacob Paul Jacob knows a cushy number when he sees one he is after all a Townsville City councillor. But it would seem our man is a tad more ambitious. The Ant broke ranks against Mayor Mullets Adani airstrip rort, conveniently just before he made an abortive run for state as a Labor-aligned but not endorsed candidate. Ever since, he has been regarded as a rebel ever since among the council sheeple and certainly by head shepherd Jennifer. So when he was front-paged in todays Astonisher calling for an easing of water restrictions, many a pundit including The Pie, immediately assumed this was the signal for a Jacob joust for the top office in Walker Street. And that will be tricky. Unless Mayor Mullet abdicates and retires to malta, or runs on a Labor senate ticket her dearest wish but said not be shared by those who could make it so Clr Jacob will come under some intense pressure and even be flattered with promises of future glory by the Labor Party. Because despite her simpering shy denials of being a Labor mayor, Jenny Hill is, and is seen as, just that, and mainly by Labor itself. The party back room boys reckon mayor is as far as shes going, so they wouldnt rock what they see as a returnable vote boat in local government in March 2020. They know poor old Dolan Hayes will need Ashley and Martin soon with all the hair-tearing last thing the already beleaguered mayor needs is a Labor split ticket. But trust the Bulletin to come galumphing on to this particular scene with a few editorial bromides, but the best being this hilarious piece of total unselfawareness in an iditorial, which clearly is not Astonisher editorial policy. Take your own advice, dearie. But Does The Pie Detect A Sly Dissension In The Senior Ranks At The Paper? Although The Pie doubts the feeling is mutual, he has great respect for the old-style work and values of John Ando Anderson he offers a very readable weekly service to the valuable rural readership of the paper, which clearly involves actual field work, and not just a few phone calls or, heaven forbid, lazy Facebook trolling. Now, Ando is nothing if not a steadfastly loyal News Ltd man; he has reason to be, the company spared no expense successfully defending him against spurious charge brought by the DPP over a jail interview almost 20 years ago. But The Pie couldnt help wonder if he wasnt trying to get a subtle message into the editors ear when writing today about Townsvilles landscape of words, waffle and impossible dreams. Gotta love that line Pep talks are good for morale, but in the end, they start to sound like the boy crying wolf. And that, Ando, described PRECISELY the Bulletin editorial policy. very funny. Clever too, if The Pie is right. Pop in and have a chat to , will you? For all of us. Ghosts Of Iditors Past:Theres A Reason Hes Called Typo Gleeson Typo Gleeson leaving an unsuccessful job interview as editor of Tailor & Cutter magazine. If you believe Sky Newss squeak fest hosted by Peter Typo Gleeson (sorry, only kidding) you might think David Crisafulli is returning to town for a special job and the head of TEL has changed her name.During the week, ww were treated too a hindenberg of hot air when Lil Patty OCallaghan and state opposition pollie Kid Crisafulli fielded a number of Dorothy Dixers from Typo. But one would think it was Typo in charge of the on-screen titling. And when they got around to realising their mistake, in typical Typo fashion, they got that wrong too. And Another Thing .. Best comment of the week goes to the bloke who replied to a totally embarrassing piece of nonesense in the paper about whether we are a friendly city. He suggested that of course we are we even wave to you from the roof of the Cleveland Detention Centre as you drive in from the airport. Luv it! Just what such a space-waste story deserved. Finally Its Been Another week of Wall-To-Wall umm .. Wall And we start with Mexico announcing the obvious A Final Dad Joke (Well, Worked As A Granddad Joke) Oh dear sorry. .. Thats it for another week, were off and running for 2019, its promising to be a cracker. There are a wider variety of folks taking to comments of late, keep it up, some are thoughtful, some hilarious, so entertain and be entertained. And if you have anything left over from the festive season, a donation to support The Magpies Nest will be of great assistance, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/the-massive-difference-between-buy-local-and-local-buy-how-mayor-mullet-has-played-the-townsville-business-community-for-mugs/
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