#also yes im making astarion trans

[herotune]

their friendship ingame is soooo cute to me and i had to draw something with them..

also lae'zel's hair looks both difficult to maintain and hard to do on your own and i think astarion would be the perfect person to help 🌟

[writteninlunarlight-years]

hi :D!!! was wondering if you were still doing matchups? if so, i would like to request a bg3 match up with any of the ladies :3 also i wasn’t sure if i was supposed to describe me or my tav, but its pretty much a self insert so i hope this is ok hehe THANKS AGAIN OK LOVE YOU BYE <3

gender: trans man

pronouns: he/they

sexuality: i honestly have no idea lol, i prefer woman by a longshot though!!!

appearance: i’m 5’8” ish (~173 cm) and about 200 pounds (~91 kilos), olive skin with a bit of facial hair/stubble. i have kinda built arms and legs and a nice loveable tummy. pre top surgery though so i am always in a binder and baggy shirt. i’m growing out my mullet atm so my hair is kind of a mess but! it’s dark brown and curly :) i have lots of tattoos and piercings! my clothing style is usually some giant graphic tee and work pants with some converse or something. if i’m actually trying though, i kind of dress like a grandpa hehe

mtbi: infp, enneagram is either 2 or 4, it changes every time i take it lol

personality: gemini sun virgo moon gemini rising (don’t really care for astrology tbh), initially i am very reserved and quiet, but not like cold or aloof or anything! im just extremely nervous and shy!! i have been described as intimidating but i dont see it at ALL so take that with a grain of salt i suppose. once i’ve opened up though, i really enjoy making others laugh so i will take every opportunity to do so, even if it makes me look like an idiot lol. i tend to miss a LOT of social cues, so i usually come across as very awkward and weird, but i’ve gotten pretty good at playing it off

likes: i LOVE everything about music!! i play over 5 instruments, i listen to every genre (yes even country), and i’ve been playing in either ensembles, orchestras, or bands since i was 11. i was even a music major once upon a time! outside of music, i like cats (my cats are my favorite lol but i don’t discriminate!), video games, and occasionally reading

dislikes: i have pretty bad sensory issues so i fucking HATE places like malls, grocery stores, large department stores, etc. i also don’t like a majority of social situations with people i don’t already know, i always feel so awkward and get anxious. this one really gets people, but i don’t like a lot of foods that are widely considered to be good. for example, i dislike mac and cheese, potatoes, ketchup, and most fruits. every time i tell someone this, they literally act like i just confessed to murder

extra fun fact: i am a giant nerd. like i cannot state it enough I AM A NERD! my friends use me like human google all the time, and most of the time i have the answer 😭 not trying to imply that i’m a genius or something, i just hear a fun fact or random piece of information and then never ever forget it (did you know that for a majority of the year, the closest planet to earth is not venus or mars. it’s mercury!!)

BG3 extra:

race: half wood elf

class: wild magic sorcerer

alignment: neutral good

Don't Worry—I still have yours!! I was perplexed when I saw your PFP twice, lol. Sorry for the long wait, but here is your Match!! Also, as a Midwestern/Southerner, I enjoy the genre of Country, lol. ( I, too, am a nerd; I am my family's personal Calculator, though, lol)

~~~~~ MATCHUPS ~~~~~

Baldur's Gate 3

Shadowheart

~~~~~ HEADCANONS ~~~~~

Shadowheart is one to keep to herself as well. She likes the mysterious quiet. However, she did not oppose the notion of you being the group's leader.

She sees your anxiety around new people as a hindrance and a diversion. While you are awkwardly talking to others, she can use this time to gather hidden information or send Astarion on a pickpocketing hunt.

Your tics and antics may have frustrated her initially, but as you all grew to know one another, she found them sweet and endearing.

Soon, whenever a passerby points out your flaw, she is the first and last to defend you. (Miss Ma'am always has to get the last word in)

Shadowheart worked hard to earn your trust, and you worked hard to earn hers. Soon, you two were inseparable, for good or bad.

Shadowheart took your courting very seriously and ensured everyone at camp knew you were hers. She is a princess, after all, and gets what she wants.

If you are having a tough day around people, Shadowheart will be there to help. She has no problem leading things whenever you need her to.

When you two fight enemies, it is like watching the ocean move. You two are constantly in sync, and your health never drops below 50.

When you two officially start dating and make it public to everyone, she enjoys holding hands and soft pecks on the cheek. She is still a private person, but no harm in making sure the world knows she loves you.

When you two part ways from the others after the final battle, Shadowheart and you take on a tavern of your own in Baldurs Gate. She runs the finances and shipments while you run the entertainment and bar.

~~~~~ BLURB ~~~~~

The grove had been successfully saved. However, not every person at your party was ecstatic that you had made this choice; however, you knew you had made the right choice. With your camp full of new and old faces, you smiled, knowing that this was what you were made for right then. Though saving everyone was great and all, the loud, drunken party happening was the last thing you cared to participate in. You make your rounds to your companions to tell them when you will pack up and head out; you spot Shadowheart pouring herself a glass of wine. As you finish speaking to Karlach, you stand before the princess of the night.

Shadowheart smiles at you, gently extending a glass to you before speaking, "I knew you weren't quite the party type. I am surprised you even allowed this to happen at our camp." You laugh gently, nodding along, taking a swig of the wine. Looking out on your camp, you may not be one for large gatherings, but this was wholesome for the journey ahead. You turned back to Shadowheart as she spoke again, "We could escape from here for a while, allow you time to have a real reprieve from an intense battle versus throwing yourself into more uncomfortable situations." She always knew when you grew discontent with situations and quickly altered your group's direction. Though you may be the leader, your love and compassion for Shadowheart soon made her your second in command, much to Lazel's displeasure.

You nodded briefly to Shadowheart as she gently grabbed your hand and led you to a rock face far from camp. Privacy was excellent, and it allowed your mind to run freely for once since you were tasked with killing the Goblins. As you lounged back, sipping on the wine, Shadowheart looked at you. A simple conversation between you two led to something more intent and kind through the night. That night, you two decided to flourish in your relationship and walk through life together. Once dawn approached you, Shadowheart sat in your lap, staring out into the horizon. You gently moved some hair from her face. You smiled gently, whispering, "Because of you, my world may now be complete; fight with me, Shadowheart, and let our hearts beat as one once we are free again."

~~~~~ EXTRA ~~~~~

(You and Shadowheart had broken off from the group for the evening, taking a short stroll through Baldurs Gate. Thinking about what the future will have in store for you two as you approach the final battle)

Y/N: Princess, what if a life without Shar is genuinely not what you want. I do not want you to feel forced into a life of tavern-keeping with me.

Shadowheart: My goddess has already abandoned me since the trials. I am content now as long as I have you by my side, my love.

Y/N: When did you become so romantic? Weren't you always the brooding, icy-hearted mystery girl?

Shadowheart: That may have been me in the past, but as I have helped you through your trials, you have helped me, and I am grateful for that.

Y/N: (Smiles softly at the woman and leans in to kiss her)

Shadoheart: (places a hand on Y/N's lips, a large smirk evident on her face) However, since you seem to want to pick on me this evening, I could always return to being a brat.

Y/N: Oh, is that so? I am very sure I can handle it, my sweet. (Sweet kisses intensify)

[kitom-kortil]

I totally agree on ur sa post bcus like. Coming from a SA victim too, cant victims have a sex life postassault....... like i find it weird to entirely desexualize victims when plenty have completely functional and healthy sexlives. Am i supposed to take a vow of abstinence just bcus i was assaulted in the past. If anything i WANT to see astarion be able to move on and have sex on his own accord like me!!!

But again this is also fiction n ppl can do what they want so in the words of rene descartes: who give a shit.

LIKE?!?!??! YEAH!!!! ITS RIDICULOUS MAAANNN. Im chronically hypersexual, im a victim of fuckin cocsa and sa. Like. It fucks you up, that doesnt mean youre never allowed to be sexual or have sex ever again. Like yes, I understand that oftentimes Astarions sa is not taken seriously BECAUSE of the trends of straight women in the fandom, but they are the minority of the fandom. Most of the bg3 fandom is cis men and trans people. Because that is literally the majority of the dnd community. Its a simple fact there. Even so, they are also still allowed to sexualize Astarion. Hes not real. He is simply not real. These characters, are not real.

People need to stop treated victims in any media, especially in real life, like they are never allowed to experience life anymore. Us victims are allowed to have sex. We are. And fictional characters are there for us to enjoy in a menagerie of ways. People have got to stop playing their activism/allyship roleplay with fictional characters and start fighting for real ppl.

God i have so much to say im going to scream.

I mostly read and make porn man. Thats what most of my writing encompasses even though its never posted on my main. Oh wow people who have been brutalized are still capable of sexuality what a concept!!! God i hate ppl

[dunmertwink]

I love learning about Kestrel! Does he feel more comfortable in his own skin as the game goes on? (Can’t wait to learn about the lute)

Super long answer btw!

Short Answer: Yes, but, he's def one of those people who care way too much about what others think of him, and he hides that behind this kind of arrogant, flamboyant/ grandiose mask (not unlike Astarion... they clash at first because they are fairly similar in this regard).

As time goes on and he gets more comfy around the companions, he's able to let more of himself through if that makes sense. The biggest thing that keeps him from fully accepting himself is his trauma but again, as the game goes on, he is helped through it!

Long Answer: STORY TIME! Under the cut cause there's A LOT (I tend to info-dump, so don't feel pressured to read this by any means! Marking this mature since I discuss sexy stuff)

So, way before the events of the game, like just a little over 10 years before, he and his lifelong friend Barrin*(1) escaped Baldur's Gate when they were 17.

Kestrel, throughout his childhood, was very open about being trans. It was others (his parents, the noble he was betrothed to*(2), and even his fans as "the Siren") who forced him back into the closet, so to speak. So that's why his discomfort is more external.

To actually answer the question (lmaooo), he likes the way his body looks, especially after top surgery. But he struggles with being in it, if that makes sense? He is a little ashamed that he likes bottoming (liking the way vaginal sex feels), or that he really enjoys sleeping around (and boy did he get around as a traveling bard). He def gets over this! Over time, he learns that his wants and experiences don't make him any less of a man.

Because of the way he carries himself, he sometimes gets misgendered (it doesn't happen a lot, but enough to be at the back of his mind; to most people, he's just a fruity lil guy tho).

*1. Barrin's face is "worn" by the guardian; I have a hc that the 'guardian' rummaged through the companions' thoughts to find a trustworthy person to emulate.

*2. A noble in the city took a liking to "the Siren of the Wide" and, well, some pretty awful stuff happened to Kes 🥲. The scar across his lips was from the noble's onyx ring for one.

The betrothal really upset him - the guy was just an awful person; entitled, abusive in all senses. On many occasions, Kestrel tried to escape the manor, but the Flaming Fists were always called to wrestle him back.

The night before his wedding he robbed his husband-to-be's personal safe, faked his death (by way of an altered Invoke Duplicity spell set to look like his dead body rather than just a duplicate), and fled. He bumped into Barrin who at that point he hadn't seen in years. Barrin worked shipping goods to small towns across the Sword Coast via horse and carriage and promised to help him escape BG for good.

They made their way to Beregost (the city to the south of Baldur's Gate, near Candlekeep) and made a new life there with all the money and baubles Kestrel stole from his betrothed. You'll meet Barrin in the comic!

They bought an inn with that money and the leftovers were used for Kes's top surgery. The inn was also used as a front for a fencing/ money laundering operation since they were still pretty involved in the "underground" scene. Basically from there on out he lived his best life as a traveling bard. Of course, until he was captured by mind flayers!

~Act 1 and 2 spoilers ahead!~

On top of the lute origin story, Im also writing a drabble (of sorts) of the party's reactions to Mizora's surprise visit and Wyll's transformation (it's pretty much almost done so that will be posted first - still very raw as im a better comic artist than writer).

Wyll had compared Kestrel to Astarion in personality (oops), but after a while, he realized that it was a wall that Kes had put up when it came to new people as a way to protect himself.

Kes has this saying, "People take what they want from you. Best show them only what you want them to see." In other words, trust no one and feed them bs. He's an arcane trickster/expert illusionist by trade so he embodies that a little too literally! He unlearns this during the events of the game (through the power of friendship uwu)/j.

Wyll sees that deep underneath the bullshit, Kes is actually a sweet person (saving several tiefling kids, helping Alfira finish her song, saving people from the fire in Waukeens Rest, etc). This drabble shows that Kes and Wyll have met before (will be posting soon - just polishing it up)!

He gets set back pretty badly by 1.) the idea of having to return to Baldur's Gate after being free of it for so long and 2.) seeing his abuser again after 10 years at Moonrise as a cultist (more on the noble in that drabble-thingy).

He regresses a bit by Act 3. The walls go back up and he's more... cagey. I havent finished the game yet bc im having a bitch of a time with the end of Act 2 (I'm trying so hard to keep Jaheira alive but she keeps getting one-shotted anyway by the black-hole spell)!!!!

So I will have to get back to you on how he's doing in Act 3! Lmaooo!

Again, thanks so much for the ask! I love talking about my ocs and dont get to do it a lot (on account that I dont post much about them. All my oc lore is trapped in my head lol).