#also worth mentioning is the fact that Diane clearly wanted to hug him when she took him to rehab but he didn't hug back

[dongslinger--420]

BoJack's "I have this friend" digression in Free Churro feels so tender to me. Live Fast, Diane Nguyen was one of the first times these two properly connected, so to see him feel such a connection once again, especially when their relationship is at its rockiest, just shows how much he cares about her. We also see that his parents' abuse made him internalise the ideology that he doesn't need anyone around him, which is why he can't do this in INT. SUB, despite the fact that he wants so desperately to connect with her over this again. I also think it's really interesting that, out of the many words he could've used to refer to Diane with, he chose "friend", because that is truly what Diane has been for the past 4 years. For better or for worse, she has been there for him, and he tries to connect with her once again by referring back to her in the eulogy, but just can't bring himself to do it in person.

[whatchyagonnado]

A Fresh Start (Part 2)

Prompt: Sweet Pea is a 27-year-old widowed dad, raising his daughter alone for 5 years when he meets you but he’s uneasy to start something so his daughter doesn’t get hurt.

I swear I’m also writing the requests! Don’t worry I’ve got those going too 😊 I just really wanted to write this because I couldn’t get it out of my head. Part 2 is a little longer and I got a little bit carried away haha oops. There will definitely be more parts, maybe 2 max?

Warnings: Mentions of Death, some swearing

Word Count: 2415

Part 1 

It’s been a month since Y/N met Sweet Pea. In that month she had never been so adventurous in her 26 years as she was with him. They would meet up every once in a while, and he would take her to a new spot in town. They weren’t dating, he kissed her the one time after Pop’s but nothing happened since then and she was slightly disappointed. She felt something, something she hadn’t felt since she and her ex broke up 4 years ago, but she understood why he wouldn’t want to get involved.

“I heard you’re running around with the serpent head.” Y/N looked up from her laptop to see Alice Cooper in the door of her office.

“I don’t know if that’s what I’d call it but he has been showing me around town.”

“It’s very unprofessional to be so close to the subject of an expose. The whole point is to be a distant watcher looking in.” Alice says frankly.

“Oh I finished that, I put it on your desk a week ago.” Y/N responds. Alice raises her eyebrows in shock. She crosses her arms and leans against the doorway.

“Alright then. Find a next assignment. Also, a word of warning, I’d watch out with Sweet Pea. He’s not as friendly as he comes off.” With that Alice left your office and Y/N shook her head chuckling. In the last month she’s noticed that her boss is a little quirky with interesting opinion on things, it’s what makes her such a good reporter.

Across town Sweet Pea was with his daughter, getting ready for parent teacher night.

“So if they say I did something, I definitely didn’t do it.” Charlie talks as they walk into the gym.

“Are you saying I should believe my 9-year-old over a reliable teacher?” Sweet Pea asks skeptically. He ruffles her hair as she nods and they sits down. The afternoon passed by quickly, all of Charlie’s teachers praising her and Sweet Pea gleaming with pride. His daughter was the single most important thing in his life so seeing her excel in an area that he terribly failed made him feel like he was doing an alright job as a father.

“Come on kid, let’s get you to Sarah’s house. Remember I’m picking you up at 9:30 sharp.” Sweet Pea sternly says.

“Thanks dad!”

“What are you two crazy kids doing anyway?”

“We’re going to learn braiding from Sarah’s mom and make cupcakes.” She smiles clearly excited about the night. It was moments like these when Sweet Pea missed Diane, he wasn’t able to do all these things. He had no idea how, and he wished she had a motherly figure other than Toni.

“Sounds like you two will have a good night. Call me if you need anything okay kid?” Sweet Pea shouts to her as she runs up to the house.

“Bye Dad!!” She yells back at him and he drives away his car. His mind wanders to Y/N, it’s been a while since he’s seen her. Ever since that night at Pop’s he’s felt drawn to her but he knows he can’t get involved for Charlie’s sake.

His phone vibrates, and he sees a message from Y/N, “Hey! What are you up to? Do you want to meet up?”  He smiles before he can control it.

“Yeah meet me at the Wyrm in ten minutes.” He responds promptly. Not even he knows what he’s doing with this girl but he knows he likes hanging out with her. More than he should, and he definitely wants to kiss her again. When he gets home he grabs his serpent jacket and gets on his bike. He tries to shelter his daughter as much as he can from serpent life, trying to push her to make something more of herself, so he dresses without his jacket around her. As he pulls up to the Whyte Wyrm he sees her, Y/N, the new fresh face in town with no prejudice.

“Hey pretty lady.” He shouts after her, casually flirting like they always did.

“I’m sorry I don’t recognize this handsome badass with that jacket. I’m supposed to be meeting this teddy bear Sweet Pea, tall, kind of looks like you, maybe you know him…” She trails off and chuckles as he rolls his eyes and hugs her.

“Come on smart ass, you can’t walk into the bar without me.” He grabs her by the waist and leads her into the bar. Everyone turned to look at Sweet Pea walking in and cheered towards their leader.

“They really love you eh?” Y/N says walking towards the bar.

“Yeah I guess. Oh Y/N this is Fangs, Fangs, Y/N.” He says introducing the girl to his longest friend.

“Hey Y/N, I’ve heard a lot about you. I hope you weren’t too harsh in your expose.” Fangs tells her, and Y/N chuckles.

“Only wrote about the flowers and unicorns in this place.” She tells him and winks at him. Sweet Pea stares in admiration at how well she seems to be getting along with Fangs. They each take a shot and disperse. Sweet Pea and Fangs head over to the pool table with Y/N close behind.

“You play Y/N?” Fangs asks her, holding out a pool cue to her.

“Yeah, I don’t think you want me against you though.” She says with a smirk and Fangs starts to laugh.

“Alright, then you’re on my team, Sweet Pea find a partner.” Fangs declares and Sweet Pea glares at him, angry that he stole his intended partner.

“Toni, come here we need to teach these losers a lesson.” Sweet Pea shouts across the room. Toni happily comes on over and grabs a cue as well, agreeing to part take only because it’ll help Sweet Pea with Y/N.

“Oh Sweets, you shouldn’t be so confident, I am a professional pool player somewhere.” Y/N says confidently causing Sweet Pea to chuckle.

“Sure pretty lady, but somewhere isn’t here.” He responds winking. Twenty minutes later Fangs and Y/N are sharing a celebratory beer at the bar. Sweet Pea hangs by in the corner sulking dramatically, earning him pity looks from Y/N.

“Oh come on Sweets I know you let me win.” She walks up to him.

“I actually didn’t, this was the first game I’ve lost in years.”

“Sorry bud, you’ve got to get taken down sometimes.” He laughs a little. In a way he’s thankful that he lost to her, it just showed just how tough this girl really was, maybe she really could handle him.

“Hey you want to get out of here?” He asks her, looking into her wondering eyes. She smiles and nods, letting Sweet Pea lead her out. He walks over to his bike and she stops in her tracks.

“Oh no no no, there’s no way I’m getting on that deathtrap.” Y/N tells him frankly.

“Come on, live a little. Here you can have the helmet if it’ll make you feel better.” He stands in front of her towering her.

“Ugh fine, but you better drive safe.” She got on the back of the bike hesitantly. She held on to Sweet Pea, enjoying the closeness and he reveled in the fact that she was holding on so tight to him.

“So where are we going?” Y/N tries to shout at Sweet Pea but to no avail. They are going so fast he can be barely hear her. The two of them ride for ten minutes until they reach the quarry. It’s a calming location in the night time, it’s become less popular over the years as new places opened around Riverdale. Only the older serpents really knew about it.

Y/N is still paralyzed on the bike holding on to Sweet Pea even after they park. He grabs her hands and slowly unwraps himself from her to face her. Grabbing her face and looking her in the eye.

“Hey Y/N you okay?” She looks at him and manages to nod. Slowly she starts to move again, managing to take the helmet off.

“Well that was terrifying.” She finally talks.

“Okay fine I’ll go slower next time.” He chuckles and starts to walk towards the rocks on the water. Y/N manages to get off the bike and walk on her shaking legs, following the towering man. Sweet Pea felt like a teenager again tonight, playing pool, riding with a girl on his bike, coming to the quarry. It all reminded him of his high school days.

“Wow this place is beautiful.” Y/N says as she stares in wonder.

“We used to always come here after school, now it’s become more deserted but it’s still nice a place to and relax.” Sweet Pea responds, sitting down on a smoother rock. Y/N plops down next to him.

“It’s so peaceful.” She barely whispers. The two of them are sitting next to each other, barely touching but just close enough so their heartbeat gets faster.

“So where’s Charlie tonight?” Y/N asks breaking the silence.

“She’s a friends house for a sleepover tonight. I’m flying solo.”

“Do you mind me asking where her mom is?” Sweet Pea takes a deep breath, knowing this question was bound to come up eventually.

“She passed away 5 years ago. She got really sick and it all happened so fast the doctors could barely do anything. Charlie was young, but she still half understood what was happening. It was a hard time.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that Sweet Pea, my condolences.” She grabs his hand and hold it tight offering the sincere message. He interlocks their fingers and holds on tight as well.

“It’s hard losing a partner like that.” She continues to say and Sweet Pea turns to look at her.

“Oh no Diane and I weren’t together. We had a one-night stand when we were 18 that led to Charlie. Even as we raised her we never saw each other as anything more than co-parents. That being said I do really miss her.”

“Wow Sweet Pea, that’s a lot to go through at our age. For what it’s worth from what I’ve seen you’re an amazing dad. Not a lot of guys can do what you’re doing at 27, heck not a lot of grown adult men can do what you’re doing.”

“Thanks for saying that Y/N. I’ve got Fangs and Toni and sometimes my mom to help me out but it has been a full time job on top of a job.” Sweet Pea looks at this girl in front of him. She looks at him with such sympathy, a look he’s seen many times before but from her it looked much more genuine. They were both staring at each other, leaning closer and closer until finally they kiss again.

Their lips moving in sync, making it better than the first time. Soon Y/N’s hands were in Sweet Pea’s hair and his hands were on her waist, pulling her in closer to him. Their hands start to wander and before they know it things are getting super heated. Sweet Pea pulls away and looks at her.

“So my place or yours?” He asks.

“Mine, mine is easier.”

*The Next Morning*

Sweet Pea wakes up from one of his best sleep in a long time holding a beautiful girl. The same girl that never judged him, never looked at him like she was above him, the one that never held the fact the he accidently knocked up a girl when he was 18 against him. She was curled up in him sleeping soundly, and he was afraid to move. He had no idea what he was doing with this girl, but he couldn’t help himself. In the month that he’s known her, he’s had a more pep in his step. He’d look forward to being on Northside if he had to for business. Even Charlie noticed that he was in a generally happier mood.

“Shit, Charlie!.” He whispers and panics a little when he remembers he has to pick up his daughter at 9:30. Unfortunately his dog tags click as he shuffles to try and see the clock, waking up Y/N. She has a huge smile on her face before she opens her eyes, feeling Sweet Pea next to her. Then the panic sets in.

“Oh God what did we do?” She snaps up and looks at their naked bodies next to each other. Sweet Pea meets her eyes, a little hurt by her reaction. His face turns sour.

“What time is it Y/N?”

“8:30. Sweet Pea you didn’t answer my question.”

“I have to pick up my daughter.” He says monotone, getting out of bed and starts getting dressed.

“Sweet Pea at least look at me. What are we doing?”

“I don’t know Y/N! I don’t know!” He shouts at her, as he stops getting dressed. Y/N can’t help but stare at his undressed body, looking very good for a single father. “Damn I have a kid I need to think about, I can’t be dating right now” he continues. Y/N looks visibly hurt at his comment.

“I don’t either.” They stay in silence for a little bit. “I haven’t been into someone like this since my ex, I don’t really know what to do anymore, I don’t know how to date.” Y/N admits. She sits back down on the bed. Sweet Pea sits beside her.

“I’ve never been so intrigued by a girl like you. Y/N you peaked my interest from the moment you knocked me over. I just don’t know how to date and be a dad. It’s a lot for me.”

“Why don’t we just take things slow. Take it easy and figure this out together?” Y/N propositions and Sweet Pea turns to look at her.

“Okay we can try that but you can’t meet Charlie as my girlfriend. I don’t want her to get her hopes up only for us to not work out.”

“I can live with that.” They lean in and kiss again before Y/N pulls away.

“You should probably get Charlie then.” She tells him and they both get up to get dressed. As Y/N walks Sweet Pea to the door he looks at her and kisses her again.

“I guess I have to take you on real date now but I’m glad we’re trying this out.” He tells her.

“Yeah me too.”

“Bye pretty lady.” He kisses her as he walks out.

“Bye handsome badass.”

To be continued…

Part 3

[secondsofhappiness]

How Robert Sugden Stole Christmas

I have to say, I have been watching Emmerdale for nearly 23 years now and that was hands down the most batshit crazy episode they've ever done.

This could be a long post...!

First off, I think the premise was clear: delve into Robert's head and offer an insight into him, his past and his future and to try to tie up some loose ends including issues with family, Aaron and his own mental health. That much was obvious and I think they achieved a lot of that but I think it could have been done in a much more simple way with less confusion (some moments baffled me a little) and a little more clarity in storytelling.

We have Rob realising, through his dreams, that his actions cannot continue, being smacked in the face with the possible outcome of his behaviour...

I mean, not only is the inside of Rob's brain INSANE, it's fascinating what it focuses on - high fashion (did you see Charity's HAT?!), guy liner, Jimmy's underpants (what the ever loving hell?!), Aaron in a suit (obvs), Doug's incessant rambling and Dan dancing in a velvet suit. Christ. Frightening.

The thing I adored was that it started with The Sugdens and ended with them too. He woke up to them in his dreams AND his reality. The focus on them as a family was the best part of the whole episode to me. I'll get back to that...

- Aaron would die if Rob didn't change? I mean, I get that in the past Aaron's self harming was an issue and Aaron alluded to his mental health being so bad that he'd end up in a dark place but it didn't make sense to me why Aaron would be dead. Or was this just a way to shock Rob into realisation?

- Seb. Why did Rebecca say he was ill and no longer around? What on earth was that about?

- Lawrence still has feelings for Robert? What was the whole cheek stroking moment?! Are we still there?!

That aside - VALERIE EFFING POLLARD. The fact she appeared sitting on her gravestone, sassing everyone and making terrible jokes at Rob's expense. Perfection. I am SO SO happy she was the returning character and it made me realise how desperately I missed her. She made the first half for me.

Ryan was endlessly wonderful, especially with the wide eyed "what the hell" moments as they progressed and the sass. His one-liners never ever fail to make me smile hugely. Ryan delivers them like no other and I enjoyed the many Jimmy hugs. Again, WHAT THE HELL WAS WITH JIMMY'S underpants? Rob's subconscious is bloody screwed up!

So Rob learned a weirdo lesson. It was all a little heavy handed, abstract and confused but I got their intention - he needed to be shown that his actions have consequences that he normally doesn't see or isn't faced with the reality of.

I LOVED Rebecca's portion of the "lesson" for her words. They were GOOD words. The whole speech about the attraction of Rob, how he has no friends and generally slapping him in the face with reality was so refreshing as it was all about Rob and his character and it was very aware. The show does know who he is and I was so giddy that they really displayed that.

On a hilarious note - Rob in guyliner being kicked into a grave was bloody hysterical, not to mention Chas in her dramatic "mourning mother" outfit. The whole thing was camp and ridiculous and crazy fun even if it was a little too wacky to make that much sense at times hahaha

Then we have the reality. The Sugden scene right off the bat was my favourite part of the episode. We have gotten so used to Rob dismissing his family, showing little interest in spending time with them (unless he wants something or can't escape them) and I've felt so disappointed of late that Rob and Vic never seem to have a sibling relationship. I felt it so deeply in this episode with her teasing and her cuddles. That whole scene was simple but full of such warmth. Rob even gently teased Doug. Diane was a true mother figure and Vic was such a little sister. It was so lovely and watching Rob slowly feel grateful for them ending with a cuddle that clearly meant a lot to him... it was wonderful to me. All I could think was that when they left, who else will visit him? It was very Scrooge-esque. I truly felt Rob's loneliness and isolation in the moment that Vic was perhaps going to leave. What a sad sad moment that was and Rob's teary eyes were gut wrenching.

Then there's the Aaron of it all.

Now, I feel like the episode was designed to end two strands of storyline:

1) Aaron's path to self worth, agency and confidence

2) Robert's path to realisation, a healthy lifestyle and acceptance of his behaviour

I liked the Rob we saw. I LOVED the recognition that Rob has done this before - the whole seeing the light bit - and has a poor record of carrying through. That was EXCELLENT. It's true and it's so important for his character to recognise that.

I loved his line about loving Aaron more than himself. That was so well written and illuminating. It's so unhealthy that he feels that way. We've seen it time and time again. I also really loved the moment he accepted that his relationship with Aaron was intense in good and bad ways. It's so true and it was a WONDERFUL moment of clarity for him. His behaviour with Alex was also crazy illuminating. It's not the first time he has recognise that Alex is "perfect" and what Aaron "should be with". Fine, he's simple and easy to love and just generally inoffensive and good. That's a brilliant thing and Rob sees this as what Aaron should have. Aaron should be with someone who makes him happy and treats him well but we all know Alex isn't it. He's way too plain for him but, for now, he's easy and gentle and the antithesis of Rob and well, isn't that the point?!

The final scene was really something.

This is the progress I wanted for them all along. It's the redemption I wanted for Rob all along.

His strength of character and his self awareness was striking to me and I was so stunned by him this whole episode especially during the scene with Alex. He was like "if you like Aaron, you are insane and a total coward if you don't fight me for him." Jesus. Character development or what

The fact that he OPENLY admitted that he'd be a crying heap on the floor or throwing himself out of the window. The fact his feelings were on the surface of his skin. The fact he let people care for him. The fact that he was honest with Aaron in such a vulnerable way... it was all truly something to cherish as a fan of Rob's character. He has never been given so much insight before and it was so special.

I loved that a few things were made very obvious:

- Rob did this for Aaron

- Rob also did it for himself despite how much it hurt

- Rob is focusing on himself and being better

- Rob is allowing his family in a little

- Rob loves Aaron very very much

- Aaron loves Rob very very much

- Aaron is the person in control of his own life and his own choices (this was really important after the past few weeks of people dictating to him)

- Aaron and Rob CANNOT be without each other in their lives in some way

- Robert has a friend (which we all knew he had anyway but him actively declaring his friendship with Aaron as something so vital and important... lovely)

All of this was so final but in a "mid point" kind of way. It was healthy and a rather lovely way for them to find some peace. It turned an INCREDIBLY complex relationship into something rather simple - we both care deeply but romantic shiz isn't on the cards so we are committed to be friends

This didn't seem like friends in the cop out sense. It seemed very firm and accepted and truthful. Aaron wanted it and it meant a lot to him, clearly. Rob, well, he wants is desperately and means it but the hurt will take a little while to lessen.

All in all, it was bloody weird. Good but weird and emotional and I haven't a flipping clue where we go from here but if there's one thing you can't deny, it's that Danny and Ryan have RIDICULOUS chemistry and their scenes - no matter the subject matter or tone - are forever incredible. Ryan carried that episode and god does he have range - he can flip from comedy to heartbreak so rapidly it's a joy.

So yeah! I'm off to rewatch again as my family are all asleep so I'll no doubt have more random thoughts. I'd love to know what you all think though ☺️