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rfsak2 · 7 years ago

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Cactus, Part XI

I actually really enjoyed writing this chapter. Hope you enjoy this too!! Drop me a line and hit that little heart on the bottom. I need your love and affection...

Cactus, Part XI Summary: Support. Harry/Jamie Warnings: A jerk who says jerk things.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes. She’d had a migraine all day.

She appreciated rock. She loved it in all it’s many forms: soft, glam, indie, grunge, she even veered into the land of 80s hard rock every once and awhile. She loved music.

But as with everything in life, she was allowed to have a preference and screamo just wasn’t hers. Especially when the bloody band’s guitarist didn’t know the first thing about writing melodies or playing them for them for that matter.

Hence why she was brought in.

Not that the guitarist appreciated it.

He didn’t. Loudly and obviously.

“I don’t need help from some upgraded groupie.”

The producer grit his teeth and frowned. “You do if you want to make a debut album that does anything, if you want to make music that someone will listen to. You need a melody. Right now all you have is a mush of noise that doesn’t make any s-”

“That’s what it’s supposed to sound like.”

“Well right now, it doesn’t sound like anything. Even your average screamo fan isn’t going to be into this.”

“Good!” He threw his hands in the air. “It’s not for public consumption. It’s art.”

The producer rolled his eyes. “You dumbass, welcome to being signed to a major label. There is no such thing as ‘not for public consumption’. If you’d wanted that you should’ve stayed with your indie label.”

She sighed. “Look, I’m not here to do your job or change-”

“No you’re just here to steal my place in the band.”

She rolled her eyes. “I have two bands, I don’t need another one, promise. I just-”

“Want to find another man to-”

The lead singer stepped forward. “Hey, man that’s not necessary.”

“Don’t need another one of those either.”

“Look, bitch, just because you suck some fam-

The producer shoved to his feet. “That is out of line! The-”

She held her hand up and stood, setting her guitar in its stand. “Look, dude. I don’t give a fuck about your opinion my relationship. Couldn’t really careless and it’s none of your bloody business. Also has absolutely nothing to do with this. I’m a guitarist and a fuckin’ good one. I can help you, but I won’t if you don’t want it. It’s fine. No skin off my nose. I get paid either way.”

The lead singer nodded. “I want her help.”

She looked at the guitarist, who shrugged. “Don’t want any watered down fake-psychedelics on this record. Don’t want none of that pop shit.”

“C’mon, man, even you were busting a nut over some of the solos she wrote for Styles.”

“Co-wrote, with our friend Mitch, by the way.” She shrugged. “It’s up to you though. I can help. Write ya a couple melodies and get right back out of your hair. But it’s up to you.”

The guitarist made a noise in his throat. “Fine. I don’t like whammy though. And I play exclusively on heavy strings. Like the sound better.”

She turned away to grab her guitar and rolled her eyes, who did this fucker think he was? The next Slash? She shot a look at the producer who gave her an apologetic shrug. “Duly noted. Let’s do this shit.”

Later, migraine still sitting heavily behind her eyes, she stopped at the Whole Foods. Harry was due back today after a week in New York for a photo shoot. The only food they had in the house currently was junk food and the poor boy would be exhausted, she should get some real food in him.

She was was trying to decide if the broccoli looked fresher than the zucchini when her phone rang. FaceTime audio, meant he was still on the plane’s wifi.

“‘ello, beautiful monster.”

She smiled. Two years and she still couldn’t get enough of him. His voice still made the center of her chest warm, still made her want to bury her face in his shoulder, let him wrap himself completely around her. The way she was currently feeling, mutual bathtime was on the list tonight. “Hey gorgeous boyfriend of mine.”

He chuckled. “God I miss yeh, woman. Need yeh… badly. Gonna bury myself so deep in yeh when I get home…”

“I missed ya too.” She felt her cheeks heat and she turned her phone down. “But you need to be careful with all that, baby. Don’t need PhoneSex-gate part two.”

She could practically hear the one-hundred watt stunner on his face. “No one around te hear, love. Promise.”

“You’re in a flying metal tube. Not really anywhere to not hear ya.” She smiled. “So cool your jets and we’ll follow up on that suggestion when ya get home.”

“They are never cool when it comes to you, y’know that. But, I’m gonna hold yeh to that… and to me.”

She snorted. “Was that a pun? Not your best work, Hazza.”

He sighed. “I’m tired and horny for yeh, love, give me a break. Still in studio?”

She shook her head forgetting that he couldn’t see her. “No. I’m at Whole Foods. Any requests for welcome home dinner?”

“You.”

She flushed again. “Haz… I’m serious.”

He chuckled again, the sound deeper and a little more stimulating. “So am I, love. Just wantcha. Don’t much care about what else happens tonight.”

She smiled. “Should I just get take-out then? I’ll grab some breakfast stuff and I can make breakfast in the morning.”

“What time d’yeh have to be in studio tomorrow?”

“Don’t. The guitarist is an asshole and the producer’s givin’ him a day to cool off.” She sucked her tongue. “Not gonna help much. Can’t cure bein’ a prick.”

He was quiet for a minute and she knew her very astute boy was putting two and two together from past conversations. “What did he do?”

“Don’t worry about it, baby. It’s handled. What do you want for breakfast?”

“What did he do, Jamie?”

She sighed. “Hazza-”

“Don’t Hazza me. What did he do and how long has he been doin’ it?”

She fought against the migraine and the exhaustion that tempted her with snapping something rude at him. She knew he was just trying to help. “He’s just… just bein’ a twat, y’know? Doesn’t want help obviously and his only response to that is to-”

“Harass you?”

“Not physically.”

“What did he say?”

“Just bitchy comments about our relationship, Hazza. I swear, it’s not a big deal.”

He huffed. “Because if it was, you’d tell me, right, pretty girl? You’d tell me.”

“Of course. If I didn’t feel like it was under cont-”

“It doesn’t matter if it’s under control or not, love. I want te know.”

“Okay.”

“I don’t like it when you give in so easily, monster. Don’t trust it. Just means you’re not planning on doin’ it.”

She laughed. “It’s just not a-”

“Don’t say it again, love. It is a big deal. It’s a big deal that yer being harassed in yer workplace because of yer relationship with me. It’s a very big deal. To me, at least.”

“It’s just…” She sighed.

“Just what, love?”

“There’s not much that can be done. If someone wants to be a pig-headed jackass and comment on somethin’ that isn’t his business, he’s gonna do it. All I can do is defend myself.” She shrugged.

“I can defend you, love. And if they’re not willing to listen to you, they will definitely listen to me. Why else was I blessed with height and a deep, scary voice, if not to knock some sense into chauvinists?

“That is a valid point and you know that I appreciate your chauvinist-knocking skills. But I can’t have my rich, famous boyfriend steppin’ in to fight all my battles, baby. Ruins my street cred.”

He laughed and she felt like the conversation was back on track. “Fine. Okay. I want waffles and bananas and bacon, British bacon, none of that crunchy American shite.”

She chuckled. “Okay. That I can do. When do you land?”

“Within the hour at this point.”

“Okay, we left your Rover in its normal spot. What do you want for dinner, gorgeous?”

“Thank you, love. Chinese?” He yawned. “From that one really good place in Chinatown?”

She smiled. “Yeah, I can do that-”

“Excuse me…?”

She jumped, almost dropping her phone, and turned toward the girl. “Yeah?”

“Who’s tha’, love?”

“You’re Jamie Schwartz, right? Harry Styles’ girlfriend?”

She nodded sort of dumbly. She didn’t think she’d ever get used to the fact that people, people who were not related to the music industry at all, knew her name.

“Jamie?”

“Are you on the phone with him?” The girl edged closer and Jamie took a step back, almost tripping over the low shelf of the vegetable aisle.

“Jaime? Are yeh okay?”

She nodded and then remembered, he couldn’t see her. “Yeah… I’m fine, baby. Just a fan. Just a second.” She smiled at the girl. “Yeah. I’m Jamie. What’s your name?”

“Candace.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” She shook the girl’s hand. “Sorry about that. I’ve a bit of a migraine. Makes me a little slow on the uptake.”

The girl shrugged. “I just wanted to say that the BTS of the tour is fantastic and you all looked like you had a blast.”

“BTS?”

“Behind the Scenes.”

The video of all the random shit they did to keep busy on the tour. She smiled. Harry had sent it out via youtube and twitter not long ago. Twitter fuckin’ imploded.

He hadn’t even really intended to ever release something like that, in fact most of it was shot on someone or another’s iPhone, not by his professional photography team, but so much of it had been legitimate comedic gold and it just seemed unfair to keep it to themselves.

It had everything from dance numbers (chiefly from The Best Song Ever music video complete with everyone wearing one of Harry’s big cheesy grins) and compilations of her and Mitch’s Riff-Offs, band members falling asleep in random places (shot mostly by Harry) and of her saying ‘Let’s do this shit’ over and over again… set to a sick drum beat laid down by Sarah.

It really was great.

Jaime smiled. “Oh. Yeah, we did have a blast. Fun group to tour with.”

“I think Harry may be the most extra person alive.”

“He has his moments.” Jamie smiled. “He can be dramatic but it keeps life interesting.”

“I am not dramatic!”

She grinned at the girl who probably couldn’t hear Harry and spoke into the phone. “Yes, you are, baby. But I do love you anyways.”

Candace smiled. “I also wanted to tell you that… I know you’ve gotten some hate from the fand- from his fans, that some people have said some really horrible things about you, but most of us love you and think you’re great and we want you two to be happy.” She took a deep breath. “We all, the normal fans, we all think he seems like he’s the happiest we’ve ever seen him. I want to thank you for that.”

Jamie smiled and set the broccoli that she’d been holding this whole time down. She held her arms out and wrapped Candace up in a hug. “Thank you, Candace. That is very much appreciated.”

She nodded and waved before quietly excusing herself.

“What did she say, love?”

Jamie smiled. “She said that they think you’re the happiest you’ve ever been. And then she thanked me for it. Sweet girl.”

She placed the take-out order as soon as Harry had to hang up to land. She made it home maybe ten minutes before he did, popping the cork on a bottle of wine and letting it breathe almost as soon as the grocery bags hit the counter.

She had just put the groceries away when she heard the door open. She smiled and made for the foyer, pausing in the archway to watch him toe off a boot. He was holding their take-out, plastic bag containing those distinctive cartons and he smiled at her.

“Come ‘ere, gorgeous woman.” He set the bag down and opened his arms. He caught her as she all but threw herself at him. Wrapping her legs around him, she sighed into his neck.

“I missed you, baby.”

He grinned and squeezed her tighter. “Ah… my pretty, little monster. I missed yeh too.”

“Even though it’s only been a week?” She leaned back and cupped his face in her hands.

Pursing his lips for a kiss, he nodded. “After the first five minutes, darling.”

She smiled and leaned in for the kiss. “I love you.”

“Love yeh too.” He carried her into the kitchen and set her on the counter, almost knocking over to open wine bottle and the glasses she’d set out.

She just managed to catch one of the glasses before it rolled away and cackled. “You are a menace. I swear, I just want to wrap you up in bubble wrap.”

He grinned. “I didn’t see them, love. Didn’t expect them to be there. Too busy suckin’ on yer neck.”

Leaning forward, she cupped his jaw and leaned in to slip her tongue into his mouth. He groaned, pulling her forward on the counter so she had to lean against him to stay upright.

She drew back and he followed her tongue, drawing her bottom lip between his as he started tugging rather incessantly at her flannel button-up. He tugged it down her shoulders until it got stuck in her elbows and pulled away from her lips to rasp, “Need yeh naked, love. Please.”

He reached down to unbutton her jeans and paused. “Wait, monster. Is your head still hurting?”

“Huh?”

He grinned. “You told the girl that you had a migraine. Are you okay now?”

“I love you.” She smiled up at him and kissed him. “Yes I’m fine. Please don’t ever stop being you, Haz.”

He blushed and kissed her again, his hands unbuttoning her jeans.

Shrugging the shirt off, and started at his buttons, not that there were many to undo, God bless him. She was working a hickey into his jaw, when she remembered. “Dinner, baby.”

His shirt dropped behind him and she ran her hands over his chest. He shook his head. “Need yeh naked. Now. Been hard for yeh since I called yeh. Love, I need yeh.”

She groaned and leaned forward to suck harshly on his collarbone, hands smoothing up his chest to bury in his hair. “Okay… We’ll eat later, we’ll eat... “ She moaned against his skin as he shimmied one large hand into her jeans, cupping her intimately.

Later, laying on the couch after a long, hot bath and reheated Chinese food, they settled in to Netflix binge, each sporting a nourishing layer of her Oatifix face mask and a glass of wine. He laid back against her, head against her breasts, his weight pleasant and comforting against her.

She ran her hands through his fringe, keeping the unruly hair from drifting into the sticky paste.

“Still no studio tomorrow?”

“Nope.” She shrugged. “It won’t do anything. You just can’t fix fucktard.”

He smiled softly. “What did he say, love? Tell me the truth.”

She sighed and ran her fingers through his fringe. “I knew you wouldn’t let this go.”

“Monster, I could tell yeh were still angry when I talked to yeh on the phone. Yeh never hold onto to things like that. So how bad was it?”

Jamie smiled. “Well, apparently I make ‘pop shit’ and I’m after his job.”

He looked rather amused. “In a screamo band? Yeh want his job in a screamo band?”

“Evidently. I also have a nefarious plan to contaminate his ‘art’ with my fake-psychedelics.”

“Oh?”

She chuckled and carded through his hair again. “Also, I think I have a right to do this… because I suck your dick. I mean he didn’t really get to finish that thought, Benny shut him down pretty quickly, but that is where it was going.”

Harry glowered at her over his shoulder, the expression a bit softened by the paste on his face. “Oh really?”

She shrugged. “It pissed me off for sure but I was going to let it go. I know the truth, this asshole clearly doesn’t. Also I suck your dick and I enjoy it, so why shouldn’t I?” Harry laid back against her chest and chuckled. “But then he finally ‘agreed’ to let me help and told me that he hated whammy and only liked heavy guitar strings. Like who the fuck are you? You don’t pay me, the studio pays me to help you sound your best. I don’t care what you like. If what you liked was good, they wouldn’t have brought me in.”

He snorted but arched to watch her face. She smiled and kissed his hair.

“That’s why all their shit sounds so muddy, they need at least one person not just strumming to some indiscernible beat.” She rolled her eyes. “So I tried to introduce a subtle melody, nothing crazy, just something to break up the constant wha-wha-wha. I ruined it by mentioning that he’d be able to play it on heavy strings if he wanted but that it’d be easier and more comfortable to play them on mediums.”

Harry turned to face her fully, pulling her legs into his lap. “And then wha’?”

She ran a hand over her face and sipped at her forgotten wine. “I shouldn’t have said anything. In the back of my mind, I knew I was poking at him-”

“You were offering your professional opinion which is part of your job. You’d be remiss not to mention it.” Harry shrugged. “He’s the fuckwit that let it hurt his feelings.”

She went to kiss his cheek but remembered that his face, like hers was covered in an oat-y, gritty mask. “We need to get this stuff off our faces.”

He nodded and let her up, throwing an arm over her shoulder. “And then what happened?”

She sighed. “He just lost it, ranted about me trying to change his style, the whole style of the band, called me some names, made some insinuations. His bandmates tried to check him but then he hollered at them for a bit and stormed off.” Jamie huffed.

He frowned and motioned her into the en suite before him. They took up position at their respective sinks and he sighed, washing his face. “I like the way this stuff smells.”

She nodded. “It makes me think of how warm and sweet your mom’s house always smells.”

“Yes! That’s what it is!” Harry grinned. “I couldn’t place it.”

She threw a towel at him. “You’re drippin’.”

He grinned. “So were yeh… not three hours ago.”

She let him pull her into his arms and kissed at his jaw. “You and your dirty puns…”

“Nothing dirty here, love. I am so fresh… so clean, clean. Took a bath, washed my face.”

She laughed, throwing her head back. “Very true.”

He kissed her head. “What’re yeh planning te do then, love?”

“About that guitarist?” He nodded and she shrugged. “I’ve already written the melodies for the songs that needed it most. I’ll deliver them to Benny. I get paid anyways. He’ll just have to figure it out for himself.”

He nodded. “Sounds good.”

She kissed his chest, right next to the little monster charm she gave him almost a year ago. “Thank you for listening. I appreciate it.”

“Thank you for telling me.” Harry buried his face in her hair. “I just want te support yeh the way yeh support me.”

She smiled against his skin. “How do you mean?”

“Love, whenever I’m with you, I’m allowed to just be me. I can be goofy and stupid. I can be sensitive and intelligent. I can like football and candles and take baths in rose-scented water and do face masks with you. You don’t judge. You won’t judge. I don’t feel like I’m being edited at all. None of that will turn you off…”

She made a face. “I don’t know, baby… the Packers though…”

He put his hand over her mouth. “Shh… woman, don’t ruin the moment.”

She smiled under his palm and kissed it. “I love you. For you. That includes but is not limited to those suits I’m not as fond of as your other suits, your candles, your god-awful taste in NFL teams and everything else. I love you.”

“Which suits?”

She mimed zipping her lips.

“But no, love. Really. Which suits?”

Part X Up Next: Part XII

#harry styles #harry styles/reader #harry styles/oc #harry styles fanfiction

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survivorindia · 8 years ago

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Episode 1-Queen Maple Syrup Chugger Liam

Liam's on the other tribe. </3 Hopefully I will be reunited with Queen Maple Syrup Chugger Liam and we can rule this game before I live up to my villain role and backstab him. :D Also meeting people is annoying, we're all so fake to each other and we know it.

Lol I'm being so fake to someone. I'm talking to them about not liking fake people while I'm being the fakest ho out there.

MMMMMMMM so Ruben and Alexis are dating outside the game. Don't mind me, I'm just on the edge of spilling some tea. I C O N I C.

Tbh I'm probably out, Lexi knows too many damn people.

Let me just say that Robin is amazing and I'm her #1 fan

youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWizmnr8Ylc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mc7x7gO4FDs

So first opinions of my tribe? Dry.. I've talked to Dom who seems nice & he's the person out of everyone who I could see myself most working with. Ruben's pretty cool but everyone else just seems blah.. I just hope that we can liven this tribe up a bit just so that we can get this challenge done.. I'm throwing out suggestions & kinda sorta trying to lead my team this week but no ones responding. If we end up at tribal i swear to God.. anyways, thanks to Bernel, who's a good friend of mine outside this game, I know a good amount of tea about his tribe.. like how he plans on alligning with Jordan & Jaiden & one other person from his tribe. He said that Jordan wants to eventually work with some newbies, so my game plan at this point is to try and form a good connection with Dom, so he & I can be the newbies Jordan, Bernel & Jaiden work with.

So my tribe is heading to the first tribal council, surprise surprise, and yes I am feeling extremely nervous cause who wants to be the first person to go home? 24th place? That's flop status.. but anyways, I'm hoping that since Dom & i promised to have each other's backs I'll be safe. I just have to figure out where the rest of the tribe stands BUT NO ONE TALKS TO EACH OTHER!! Dom & i want to get either Lexi or Ruben out because we've both heard from multiple people on the returnee villains tribe that they're dating. And dating means alliance and anyone who isn't in an alliance with me is an enemy. Ruben was trying to pick my brain & find out where I stand with my vote, but how am I supposed to turn the tribe against his girlfriend without him finding out?? Things are about to get interesting.. hopefully

Ok so things just kinda got messy.. after talking to Casey & Lexi, i learned majority of the votes are going to Aidan tonight. So me being the messy bitch that I am.. I went & told Aidan because I want Lexi gone. He says he's on board with voting Lexi off, but even still that would only be three votes for her & then most likely three votes for Aidan. Dom is currently trying to get Casey on board but I just don't know if it's gonna work.. I really think Casey & Lexi are cliqued up & since Lexi & Ruben are together that makes three for their side. I don't know.. it all lies on Casey at this point & if somehow I end up going home tonight then so be it.. I went out swinging & trying to take my target down & that's good enough for me.

I'm very very upset because I'm pretty sure Aidan is going home tonight & even though he's not really an ally, he is a vote. However, he's messy as fuck.. he told Lexi that I agreed to voting off Casey & then asked him to talk to her & Ruben about it.. EXCUSE ME? That never happened & like.. what person wouldn't ask the person they're about to start a rumor about for permission first? Especially if my ass is trying to save you.. he just definitely could have handled that better. He said it was to throw her off or something like no, that's just messy. Anyways, even though Aidan is going home tonight both Lexi & Ruben approached me about the rumors & assured me they weren't true.. & I assured and lied RIGHT BACK TO THEM that I believed them. & I think they trust me so at least I'm on the good of the majority.

So first confessional! Hello I love my tribe, it's super cute super friendly I know that if we get going to tribal though I am definitely the weakest link and gotta go. We have jaiden who is amazing, Jordan spines what an icon, Julia the Wiccan? My fave. Nobody is realistically gonna vote out anyone but me. So I'm really hoping that we keep slaying these comps until we merge or swap or what not and that the newbie should keep flopping.

Hello I'm bacc, I guess it's time I make a confessional 👀 I'll do a tribe assessment tru Alex- kweent! They hosted the game I won so an icon truly ! Ashley- I'm on the fence w her bc I feel like she doesn't like but only time will tell suppose Kendall- icon !!!!!!! I love ha so much! Realistically if I were to make a f2 deal it'd be with Kendall, like I trust ha a lot more than the others Gav- WHEW I've already had a couple convos with this icon and honslee I can see myself working with them, Me forgetting the last person skdbsk oh yeah Ace- to trust his ass or to not trust his ass that's the question. I know ace can be sneaky so like ????? He could try to clocc me at any second Anyway I like this tribe overall and I think I've already made a solid alliance with Alex gav and Kendall so hopefully it lasts! Anyway I'm trying to do this challenge but like no! One! Is! Making! The! Doc! Viewable! On! Mobile! Like how is a bitch supposed to contribute when they're not letting me contribute Godt! Anyway I saw chicken nuggets on the list so like guess who's going to McDonald's after work :~)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bA23P2H2PA4

Whoa, I'm a nice guy I guess. I wouldn't call myself a hero so much as wimpy underdog that smells like french fries. But oh well, it'll be fun to see what I can do to destroy this Good Cop vs Bad Cop routine down the road :~). These people can't talk for shite! I can see why we're not villains because the best villains can actually like work a decent social game, not just half heartedly agree to everything I say. I've had better conversations with Gavin and Alex than with Whitney and Robin already lmao... at least Liam can hold up a conversation for something. Anywho, let's see how this goes... maybe I caught them at a bad time but I could be in a group with people with lousier social games than I! Which, I mean, isn't necessarily a bad thing but it'll probably be boring if people talk like this for a long while... I just really want this honeymoon period to end so I can stop suffering!!!

This challenge is pretty good for a guy like me, assuming I have like half of the shite there. Since it's the first challenge, if we happen to lose, all that matters is that you contributed. And I've already done like a sixth or fifth or something of the total amount so if I can find more to shove in, I think I'll be able to roll through this round A-OK. Steven, Robin, and Liam are the three I like the most so far. Whitney seems cool but it felt like she didn't want to talk to me yesterday so idk with her and Lexi idek it's like she over exaggerates stuff and that's a pet peeve, yo. Hopefully we can all become chatty because it just feels so slow... I hate the honeymoon of ORGs, these first days honestly SUCK in everything since nobody wants to do anything rippo.

Yiiikes, we lost. Our tribe isn't overly social so I'm not sure what's the happenings right now, but it looks like Steven's the one who's talking the most. I'll wager he's safe and he's pretty cool, so I'm fine with it even if he's the one wielding all the power. Lexi is talkativeish too, so she should be fine. Whitney's active enough in the tribe chat so she may make it through, not sure on people's perceptions of Robyn all too much... tbh I think Liam's in a baaaad spot here. I don't recall him helping much with the challenge nor do I think he's integrating amazing well which sucks because I can use Liam out here. I can say I helped with the challenge, but even then, I'm not sure if I have a strong enough social game to slide by without my name appearing in somebody's mouth. I'm not a social sorta guy but I'm not doing myself any favors out here. Hopefully Liam isn't going, and I can rise to the top with him here. Hopefully...

*sigh* Liam got brought up... he needs to get on and save his ass. We need a new target, it's his only chance... Though I'm not throwing my game away if he ain't gonna give two shits js

AHHHHH I got the TARGET SWITCHED I think. WHEW! Basically, I had to resort to all necessary measures I could. I went hunting and found some TEA - apparently Lexi and Ruben from the newbie villains are/were dating. How interesting. I took this and slid into Liam's PMs and told him to swing Whitney before the others could. He succeeded - she came to me and said she was down to vote Lexi! Then I went and swung Robin and I think we're both working on Steven now... this might be unanimous now... I am actually shook by how I turned the target so quickly. I just hope I'm not screwed and being duped.

I think Steven's expecting me to vote Liam out but highkey I already voted Lexi what to do what to do

HONESTLY if this works out I'm down for a Whitney-Liam-me alliance we'd rock this game whew. All that we need to do rn is make sure Robin is locked down and then Steven has put himself in one baaaad spot. I'm also fortunate that Liam's still going to be the target of Steven's mind so I can avoid the spotlight again and just do what I can to settle down the others :~)

Warning, the video is ear cancer, but... *long, drawn out, annoyingly squeaky screaming noise https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvL8kLB39aw

This tribe is so quiet or they just don't talk to me I'm definitely worried about tonight very good chance I'll be the going home but I'm gonna try to talk with Jonny and Liam and see if I can figure something out to stay

Soooo as of the moment I feel alright unless everyone is lying to me I feel like I have a good chance to stay in the game. It seems like Liam and Lexi are the targets and unless Lexi comes on and starts talking to me finally that's how I plan to vote tonight

I.. am so happy about this. First of all HELL TO THE O BITCH. So I thought I would start out badly since I wasnt here for the review because bad day, bad karma from stupid hexes. So I love this whole Hero VS. Villains twist, and the whole semi one world tribes! So my villains tribe I LOVE IT! Sarah, I feel I can trust, I love Jaiden, and I love Jordan and I feel like Jordan and Sarah will work together well, and I can work well with Sarah. So I hope that we can work really well in the tribe. More later!!!

So like I am stressed. I have no clue what so ever if I am that stable in this tribe anymore. I previously thought I was, but I was just informed by Sarah that there is an alliance. She was told by Jordan, that Bernel made a meninist alliance of him, Jaiden, and Jordan. And than Bernel now got the audacity to say that he thinks that he can pull me in. First of all, that kinda messes with my game Bernel like, now you are going to have Jaiden, Sarah, and Jordan possibly question me being trustworthy. I feel like Sarah knows that she is my ride or die, and that I completly trust Sarah the most out of this game. And it is 100 percent true, I won'the be going against Sarah, but everyone else? Be prepared. Anyway, because of this new alliance I am questioning Jaiden loyalty because he never told me, or Sarah about it. Only Jordan told Sarah. And Jordan obviously trusts Sarah more than me, which could be a potential problem. I know that because Jordan approached Sarah, and hasn'the told me a thing. Than we have Bernel, who thinks I trust him, but probably he wants to backstab me. And than Nicole honestly is on the outside and hasn'the caused any problems. This is so stressful. I'm so greatful that our tribe isn'the going to tribal, because it would have been absolute hell.

Well, I don't really know anyone on my tribe besides Lexi, which means I definitely have to start talking to people and getting on everyone's good side. UGH.

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Whew, so I know its been a bit into the game and this is my first confessional but I promise I'll make more later. So this one just going to recap everything that happened in the first episode. Low key this is a shitty tribe. Like when I think of big villain names these do not come to mind. Like okay, obviously I am Jordan Pines Evil SupremeTM but like literally the only other person on this tribe who I am like you are actually a known villain is Jaiden. Like Bernel, Who? Sarah, not a villain. Nicole, is literally a hero and Julia is like a maybe idk. Like Kendall and Karen who are on the heroes tribe should have been on the villains. Like come on people. Anyways. I am currently aligned with a lot of people? Like Me and Jaiden, Me and Sarah, Me and Bernel, Me Bernel and Jaiden, Me Jaiden and Sarah. And like i am close with Julia and Nicole just conversation wise. Whew its a lot. The good thing is that despite how big of a narcissistic asshole I am, I am not the biggest ego on this tribe. The great thing about this reject villains tribe is that everyone wants to prove themselves as deserving people of being villains and are like trying to control things already. Jaiden clearly wants to be the leader and its like have fun buddy. I've been there done that not happening this time. We won the challenge which was fun and then I contributed the most to the challenge and got an idol clue. How cute is that. I found the page like instantaneously and now am doing like grid guesses. Then my good hot friend Dom on the newbies is like hey I got an idol clue, and im like no way girl me too. It's the same one but I am pretending that I havent found the grid yet so that maybe in an hour or so I will triumphantly "find it" and share it with Dom. So ya, that everything happening so far in the life and times of Jordan Pines. I may be on a tribe of assholes, but no fear. I am Jordan Pines. I am King of the Assholes.

Of course I'm in a game with fucking Ace and Jordan Pines. I love when the trash take themselves out!

Dom is so hot b y e

I take back what I said about Jordan Pines. He actually isn't that bad so far, and I guess there's an unspoken alliance between myself, Julia, Jordan, and Sarah. I like this foursome and I also really like Bernel, too. Nicole on the other hand... girl...... I don't know what it is about her but I just can't trust her for the life of me. Bernel and Nicole are close outside of this so my prediction is that they'll stick around unless one of them goes home soon. Hopefully we don't go to tribal anytime soon though because I don't want the risk of me going out premerge AGAIN to ever come to fruition. On the other hand, Nicole needs to go now versus later because she's made the merge before and she's gotten to the finals twice. No offense but I don't need this to be a three-peat. Dom is the only newbie that I've talked to since the game has begun, and although I know Lexi and Casey outside of this, I feel like he's closer to me than I am with them already. He's a really cool dude and I get the feeling that everyone else agrees with me. He is really charming and flirtatious and it's like... woah calm down there but I think it's just his way of proving that he isn't a "villain". He talks about doing really well in ORGs so if this is his strategy, it seems to have worked for everyone else so far. Anyways Dom just revealed that he hates Kait and I won't stand for this slander >:(

Okay so I made a video confessional but it's uploading, so I will link to it below and then talk about it.

https://youtu.be/2ZQ1iepS3IY

After I recorded this, I went and talked to Casey. She told me she's in a tight foursome right now and that they're all voting together tomorrow, which means that I was probably wrong about what I thought. I don't know who the four could be but it's evident that Dom has something to do with it, and she later confirmed those suspicions. He's in complete control of that ugly ass tribe and that SCREAMS danger to me. I need to alert people to that soon because if he got the idol clue like I'm suspecting, then that's even more dangerous. I tried to tip Casey off to this, but I don't think she trusts me enough with that information so I let it go. I need to not make myself blatant about who I'm after this early on in the game, so pretty much that entire video I just recorded? Pointless. I think a good move is to just kiss up to Dom. If he wants to pretend that I'm his boyfriend, then I'll go ahead. Let him think he can control me, I guess... but that's not the truth. I know what's good for me and it isn't him. yikes he's going to be SO MAD when these confessionals come out and he sees that this is what I'm saying about him...sorry man! but ur a threat! :~) Like I said, stick to the plan. Play it safe. Work on relationships with Julia and Nicole as well as tend to relationships with Bernel, Sarah, and Jordan. Focus on Kharab before I start to involve myself in newbie drama... yuck. Dom's still a threat! I just can't be on his bad side this early.

I told Sarah about Dom's idol clue. Because Dom gave me the idol clue. So now it's four people looking for it, and I think Sarah found it...

So the game started and cast was revealed with 4 tribes. I was totally thrown into this last minute but that doesn't mean I'm not going to give my all. However I do already have one regret. I should have created a fake account lmao. I didn't expect people to know who Lexi and I were and now there is already a target on both of our backs because people know that we are dating lol. I'm more concerned for Lexi on her tribe because she's on a tribe with Whitney and Gavin who BOTH know that we date. On top of that I know Whitney is really good friends with her ex so that doesn't help her case at all. However Lexi is a good social player and if anybody can get out of it, it's her. My strategy for now is to lay low. Obviously my number one goal is working with Lexi however I'm still trying to make some settle connections with some people on my tribe. I don't know a lot of people in this game and the ones I do know outside of Lexi are not good friends of mine lol. However I'm hoping that could be used to my advantage because where there are good relationships, there are some bad relationships too. I just need to bank on that and let someone take a strike on someone else.

Johnny and I are hitting it off quite nicely...Gavin's a bitch talking about my close friend like he won't succeed, and everyone else besides Johnny on my original tribe of 5 sucks at talking. We're fucked 10 minutes in. And baby, I don't have time for that now.

Why in god's name am I a HERO I'm DISGUSTED by that word.

I'M STUCK ON A TRIBE OF AMERICANS SEND HELP.

FLIPPED IT DADDY. I AM N O T A HERO AHAHAH

SUCK ON THAT, STEVEN.

I AM BACK FOR THE FOURTH TIME!? WHO WOULD HAVE GUESSED. I should really start loving myself more but clearly I can't get enough. Clearly I am on the Villains tribe, which I knew was going to happen ...and along with me on the tribe is Jordan Pines, Jaiden, Julia, Bernel and Nicole! Honestly people are probably thinking that I would hate my tribe but I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!! I WAS BLESSED!!! I LOVE 3 out of the people on my tribe and with me thats majority and all of those three want to work together with me like...........can we talk about how amazing that is. This twist is so cute because I get to talk to all the villains on the season because we share one beach so yall are going to get first impressions from the people I have talked to last night and today! We did a villains beach call last night and it was super fun btw so im glad im playing again and whew im ready Jordan Pines: We know each other in the community, and we're in Sweden together in our swapped tribe rn so I'm so down to play with him and we get a long gr8 [2017-02-03 5:23:27 PM] Jordan Pines: I'm just dead at this [2017-02-03 5:23:31 PM] Jordan Pines: Same tribe fuxk [2017-02-03 5:30:40 PM] Jordan Pines: Like low key can we have a final 2 here I need to make single digits in a season Julia: I love her so much, we played in Bangladesh together just recently, and yea I voted her off but I'm so excited to see her! Shes also crazy which I love and she wants to work together too! [2017-02-03 5:23:39 PM] Sarah: julia [2017-02-03 5:23:42 PM] Sarah: queen [2017-02-03 7:45:30 PM] julia: WE ARE ON A TRIBE [2017-02-03 7:45:40 PM] julia: This makes me feel so much better [2017-02-03 7:45:57 PM] julia: I'm gon b very loyal 2 u Jaiden: He's hosting me in Atomic Survivor rn, and we've always talked outside of games and always connected. He worries me because he might be a little neurotic ...but hes the puppy of our tribe so ill train him well ;) Nicole: Shes so pretty! We havent talked yet but she seems so nice i am dead. Bernel: We have barely talked but Jp,Jaiden and Julia all like him...so thats good and bad at the same time that hes so well liked...so ill just keep talking to him I guess :) Dom: The ONLY newbie that came on the villains beach call yesterday and hes so cute I really like him and I can see him and I working together if the cards allign! Thats basically it but I saw that Kendall, and Karen are on the heroes tribe and they're both from the rogues tribe from r&r and so was I so basically idk how thats gonna go over with them but I would be down to work with both of them if we all three make swap/merge.

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Of all the Wiki players, you picked Aidan, Johnny, and Liam. I'm disappointed in you hosts... c'mon now. Anyway, everyone seems cool ^___^ Karen seems to know Kendall which puts me on edge, but let's hope for the best!

IN ADDITION TO THE WIKI PEOPLE, WE HAVE AAO PEOPLE... AND THEY DECIDED TO CAST A COUPLE?! https://www.facebook.com/ruben.colon.182 LEXI AND RUBEN ARE DATING AND IN THE SAME GAME. OH.MY.GOSH. HOW IS THIS A THING Also, Alex and I seem to already getting close :) I love everyone on this tribe except for Karen and Ace, thus far ^__^

First impressions: Alex - Trustworthy in the short term; extremely social Karen - Slimy; messy; manipulative Kendall - Outgoing; convincing Ace - Reserved; furry (?) Ashley - Trustworthy; cutthroat

Ashley hates Karen Karen hates Ashley and Ace Kendall is hitched to Karen Karen is hitched to Kendall but very very badly trying to make it seem like Alex and Kendall are tight, and it would be a good idea to ally with the that pair (given that Karen and I are now a pair?) All in all, I trust Alex the most. I don't want to share with anyone the info everyone is feeding to me because I may get Cesternino'ed out of the game (aka, everyone teams up on the person who is playing the middle). I'd love to see every self implode as I facilitate the implosion! Ace also loves the fact that I love his furry fandom! But... he's lowkey freaking me out >,>

Just got off call with Alex, and this is where I see the game as it stands at the moment: Kendall and Karen are a duo, but Kendall's social game puts Alex at ease. That puts me in a compromising position, as I want to keep Alex safe but take out Kendall. At the same time, I've worked to solidify a bond with Ashley and pulled strings behind the scenes to ensure Ashley trusts Alex and Alex trusts Ashley (ensuring that Alex won't vote Ashley out). Ace and Karen are also on good terms with me, with Karen and I having formally called it an "alliance." I have been added into "The Cult Alliance," consisting of Karen, Alex, and *shivers* Kendall... but the main takeaway from all of that is the fact that I was last added. It is clear as day that I cannot trust Kendall in the long-term, and as such, I would like to take her out... but that's tricky business with Alex trusting her so much. I feel safe going into the first tribal (that is, if we lose immunity), and as it stands right now, here is who I trust from most to least: 1. Alex 2. Ashley 3. Karen 4. Ace 5. Kendall 6. Bran

This group is great. I'm in love with everyone on this team. They're all fantastic human beings. I clicked with Gavin immediately, and I knew Kendall/Karen already. We're in a group called The Cult, and it couldn't be any better. I just feel really comfortable with all of them.

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Let me make something completely clear, I dislike old people. Well, not all old people, some can be really nice or funny, they don't even need a leathery face or scurrilous for me to consider them old. When person is considered old, in my opinion, when they don't stop saying shit like 'back in my day'. Whether they are 99 or 32, the moment they say "back in my day" they earn the title of old person. Now most of you may be wondering "Kendall what the fuck? What does this have to do with India?" Some of you have already accepted I'm spaz who never really gets to the point. My reasoning for this non sequitur is because I want you to understand, how bad doing this challenge has come to. Because back in my day, when we did the scavenger hunt we were competing against robots and they did all the fucking categories before the deadline. Like seriously, aren't heroes supposed to be hard working or some shit like that? Even more evidence that the tribes were picked by a hat draw. :P Technically speaking, as of now three people are doing the scavenger hunt; Alex (who only put down one), Gavin (who put down two but still got a considerable amount of points), and me (who did a lot of shit, mostly pertaining to making an ass of myself on camera). I don't doubt that the others will eventually get shit done but I'm worried they will be too late and we will be beaten by robots... Again! I mean if we do lose, I have the argument I did more than everyone. Though, I'd try to say it in a less cunty way. Emphasis on try because I am basically a child who doesn't understand basic communication.

Alright so I am a flop and have not made one of these yet... oops. So to start off, I like my tribe a lot, I seem to have a lot in common with the other hero returnees. I really like Gavin, and he has said to me that he would like to be able to work with me throughout the game and I am like hell yes. Alex likes me, which is nice, Gavin told me so, haha. Gavin just says that Alex wants to talk to me more so I will get on that. I don't really get a good vibe from Karen, idk. It could be that I like just voted her out of a game and idk if she will hold that against me so I guess we will see. Haven't really talked to Kendall, oops. Ace seems really cool, he has a lot of doggos and I am in love with all of them. Oh also I found an idol already. There hasn't even been a tribal yet and I have an idol. I got my tribe the most points in the scavenger hunt and got a clue for a reward. I found the place where we had to search for idols and found one on the first try. There was like a bunch of blocks and I had to choose one and I found an idol on the first shot. Like what am I? A goddess.

Okay so here is my first confessional and I guess I’m supposed to talk about the tribe and people. Well, they all suck and I hate them for not being able to stick with a decision. I like Ruben but Jaiden is telling me that everyone thinks we’re a couple which isn’t true at all. If I get voted out over a lie THAT stupid, I will never play again with these weirdos or come back to these games. Dumbasses! I did the second most things in the challenge and if they really love losing then might as well vote me out! Dom is such a snake, he talks to everyone and then doesn’t give any information out. Sorry but who do YOU think you are? I’m not bowing down to your feet. I talked to Aidan and told him people were saying that he was the target and then he took FOREVER to reply as if he was asking people what to say to me. Sorry for being honest and trying to save you? If you want to leave, BE MY GUEST. Then we have our all around useless tribe member Monte trying to go around and be annoying when they couldn’t even do the fucking challenge. Sorry but your ass doesn’t get a say, sit down, shut up and listen to what we want you to do. I wanted their ass to go this tribal. They’re literally useless; not good at challenges, didn’t talk to anyone until today, and is most likely aligned with the other people who played Agrabah on the returnee villains. I have no idea why they would tell me they played that game when there’s so many of them here. Casey has not been online all day and from her last night I heard Aidan, but she took so long to reply, I fell asleep. She was like “lol Aidan is the vote!” and then I asked this morning if anyone else agreed… she gave her patented short reply! “Everyone agreed” My paranoia is obviously taking over and maybe I’m fine but the way these people are acting, it seems as if I’m being voted out. Ruben thinks “oh no, we’re ALL good” and that more than one person couldn’t POSSIBLY lie to us. LMAO Give me a break. Aidan pretending to talk to Monte and then Monte saying that they never talked???????? Wonder why! Monte is either lying to cover their ass for playing all sides and Aidan is going or they are all voting me. Casey won’t get online Ruben is too optimistic Aidan is a big fat liar Monte is fake Dom… thinks he runs the tribe Watch me not even get voted out and look like an insane person, which I mean, I am? Aidan is getting voted out according to everyone and he’s acting so suspicious and doesn’t want to do anything about it. I have so much more to say but I’m just going to hope for the best that I’m still around and try to get it in for the next confessional. I’m forgetting so much but it’s time! I’ll have conversation screenshots for next time hopefully to show you how everyone is acting like a lunatic. Me, included. I can’t wait to go next tribal for acting like a psychotic person this time. I hate myself so much.. I had so much more in this before I accidentally deleted it but oh wells.

I am so excited about this! I have never played before and I'm glad to be representing the heroes. I talked to most people on my tribe and they all seem really cool. Lexi and Steven have given me the best vibes so far. I'm hoping I can get some sort of partnership or I think it's alliance that it's called on survivor. This cast is so big it's overwhelming! I'm skeptical about being on a heroes chat. I'm assuming there will be some twists associated with that. I'm going to try to talk to the veteran heroes just in case later tonight. I hope I can do well in the upcoming challenge! Time to go back to socializing

I'm getting really good vibes from my tribe. Everyone is great. I think we're a special group and I hope we can make it far. I feel like I've connected most with Steven so far. He's played orgs before and has been helping explain the kinds of challenges there are. He's been overall very helpful and I really appreciate the fact that he's reaching out to me. I would be completely loyal to him so I hope he trusts me too. Ideally, I want to form an alliance with Lexi and Steven. I'm not sure how close they are but i'm hoping they approach me about it. Also the weird guy...I forgot his name. He's "Poteet" on skype. he's nice. i talk to him occasionally and he's contributed a lot to the challenge. Whitney's been a little inactive. I'm not sure if she's just not been talking to me or it's with everyone else but Lexi said she didnt say much to her either. She did the bollywood dance for the challenge though so she's still being a team player. I think if we lost immunity Liam would get voted off. He hasnt been talking in the tribe chat or to me and Lexi. I'm pretty sure he has not done anything for the challenge either. It's nice to have someone inactive in the beginning. It makes me feel more comfortable going into tribal council. Well, that's all for now. I'll probably make another one of these after immunity results!

okay so im sad we lost immunity. this is my first game and im going to tribal on the first night, yikes! so last night i talked to steven, johnny, and lexi. it seemed like we were all on the same page of voting out liam for his inactivity. this morning, though, johnny and liam informed me that they want to get rid of lexi because apparently her boyfriend is on the villains tribe. i'm stuck because i really like lexi and i promised her i would not vote her out but johnny and liam are making this out to be a very dangerous connection. i'm not too convinced that lexi should leave because of this. if anything, this will help us at merge or a tribe swap. we could get her boyfriend to vote with us. the concept of getting rid of a premade (new term i learned today!) this early doesn't seem too effective since we're all still trying to get to know each other. it'd be great to keep them once we're at merge because they'd be easy targets. I have a feeling liam and johnny are close allies and that's why they're starting this. i'm definitely voting for liam and i will go out of my way to make sure lexi stays. i need to keep the girl numbers up!

this tribal council is going to be so messy. i am pretty sure we're going to rocks. basically, i'm going to be deciding whether lexi leaves or the vote ties. i feel like such a villain because i've been lying to whitney and johnny saying i'll vote for lexi. but i cant vote for her. i promised i wouldnt do it. i guess essentially im being heroic by sticking to what i said first? im not sure. this will be a night none of the viewers want to miss. steven and i are determine not to switch our votes.

Why are Johnny and Whitney like this.....Steven and I locked in our votes first and I thought they would be smart enough not to take the risk of going to rocks. Looks like everyone on this beach is out of their mind. The rock draw will determine who the next two targets are. I'm really hoping Johnny leaves. He's great at challenges but he can be very sneaky and I don't want him as my enemy. I hope this doesn't end up being my last confessional.

ok so these people are already a little nerdy. The only person i'm enjoying right now is Robin k. She or he idk which is really nice and were into the same shows it seems. I dont know how i ended up on a hero tribe lmao but ill take it. Ruben my boyfriend is on the villians tribe and i already got called out by gavin for it. I'm not going to hide it but not going to tell people either. I have to make a tumblr since i didnt already have one. Also this person johnny is talking about dungeons and dragons. I dont think im going to do well lol. Ok thats all for now.

#youdontgetmycrownjustcause

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