#also the way there was a scene of him driving right after this.... they're attacking me

[silverselfshippingchaos]

.... I'm going to act normal about this cutscene.

[thesandyhooktragedy]

was adam lanza a pedophile?

this is a topic of hot debate. personally i don’t believe it add or subtracts much from his case, but nevertheless people love to discuss it. so let’s discuss!

why do people think he’s a pedophile in the first place? from a young age, lanza had a fascination with violence against children. in elementary school, lanza wrote several stories featuring violence against children.

later in life, lanza would write a 35-page essay defending pedophilia as part of his college application. in this essay, lanza postulated that pedophile rights were part of the “liberation of children”, and that children should be able to make decisions as adults would. lanza also stated that he believed an “adult-child relationship” could be “beneficial for both parties”.

lanza would expand on this essay on his youtube channel, CulturalPhilistine, in an 8 part series titled “On pedophiles and children”. the transcripts for these videos can be found here

after lanza’s attack on Sandy Hook, police would find notes and basic sketches of scenes for a play called “Lovebound”, written by lanza, on his hard drive. the play would depict a relationship between a 10-year-old boy and a 30-year-old man.

many users of the forum that lanza was on, Shocked Beyond Belief, seemed to have an impression of him that included him having an attraction to children.

(full sources of picture one and three can be found here and here! these specific screenshots were found from a post by lanzagf.)

so, was he a pedophile? we have no definitive way of knowing, and there’s an equal amount of evidence suggesting that he wasn’t one. when police searched lanza’s hard drive, they found no sexual content featuring children.

it’s well known that lanza was an odd man all around, so perhaps his fascination with violence against children simply came from his “antinatalism” and general violent thoughts rather than an actual attraction to children. maybe the impression that other SBB users had of him came from his awkward personality.

the biggest question, i think, is does it matter?

an article published by the Connecticut Post puts it best—

Dr. Charles Herrick, the head of psychiatry at Danbury Hospital, said it is difficult with the information released to date to know if Lanza's interest in pedophilia had any influence on his behavior.

"The material related to his obsession with mass shootings is far more compelling about what is driving his behavior," he said.

although pedophilia could be a possible motivator of lanza’s attack on Sandy Hook, his fascination with mass shootings—something which appears to be a trend in a lot of mass shooters—is far more relevant. however, the Connecticut Post’s article offers an explanation on how lanza being a pedophile could’ve motivated him to attack Sandy Hook.

[Dr. Fred] Berlin said one could speculate that Lanza, if he had pedophilia tendencies, could have targeted the elementary school in an attempt to eliminate temptation.

"The idea is that someone who has a strong desire for something and they're forbidden to act upon it, they can be angry at the source of temptation," he said. "It's not unreasonable, given what happened. There must have been a tremendous amount of rage inside of him."

as i stated, there’s no definitive way of knowing whether or not adam lanza was a pedophile. either way, i don’t believe it adds or subtracts much from his case, as it does little to change much about his moral character. i don’t believe there’s any point in arguing about something that only serves to make a tragedy more disturbing.

what do you think? was adam lanza a pedophile or not?

[pesky--dust]

Do you believe Will orchestrated the escape? Was he intending to flee with Hannibal or was he genuinely planning to kill him?

First of all, I think that Will is a character whose behavior we cannot predict - just like Hannibal said.

In the first season, Will was vulnerable, but in the second season, he started manipulating people to get what he wanted, and he told Alana and Hannibal that he was an unreliable narrator of his own story. And I believe that this is true throughout the series, to a greater or lesser extent.

In The Wrath of the Lamb Dolarhyde attacked Will in a motel. Will was aware that Dolarhyde wanted to meet Dr. Lecter, Dolarhyde himself told him so! And this scene, according to the script, ends with the following words:

CABAL. The synonym for this word is intrigue.

So I believe that Will decided to use Dolarhyde to free Hannibal, knowing now that since Hannibal loves him and Will plays it right, Hannibal will do whatever Will asks him to do.

So yes... I believe it was orchestrated by Will to some extent.

However, was he intending to flee with Hannibal or was he genuinely planning to kill him?

That's a good question! And I will repeat what I have already written: I think that we cannot predict Will's behaviour. In Mizumono he called Hannibal at the last minute and was not sure what to do until the very end and in The Wrath of the Lamb Will tells Bedelia, "Decisions are made of kneaded feelings. They're more often a lump than a sum". It is what actually drives him.

I think he wasn't sure how this escape would turn out. Would Dolarhyde kill Hannibal? Both of them? Or would Hannibal kill Dolarhyde and him? Maybe just Dolarhyde? Or maybe he'll just leave the FBI's dirty work and not get his hands dirty in the process?

And so, another pillar of this series is curiosity. I believe that apart from his feelings, Will was also guided by his curiosity about what would happen. In my opinion, there was no grand plan. "Everything that can happen happens. Has to end well, and it has to end badly. Has to end every way it can", "If everything that can happen happens, you can't really do the wrong thing. You're just doing what you're supposed to do" (Primavera).

[EDIT, because I forgot to write about something I find important]

In ... and the Beast from the Sea, Will tells Hannibal, "I'm not Fortune's fool, I'm yours". "I'm Fortune's fool" comes from Romeo and Juliet. It's about acceptance of the fact that you have no control over your life, because everything is up to fate; Will tells Hannibal that he is his fate and so he accepts it. And in the very next episode Will finds out that Hannibal in fact loves him.

In The Wrath of the Lamb, when Will comes to Hannibal to ask him to be a bait, in his memory palace, he stands on the skull engraved in the floor, where years ago Hannibal left him his broken heart. Will accepts Hannibal's heart now and chooses him, with all its consequences, not knowing what would happen.

[END OF EDIT]

And in The Wrath of the Lamb, Will tells Reba that Francis couldn't watch her die. When Dolarhyde shot Hannibal, Will reached for his gun. I think that both curiosity and his own feelings made him want to protect Hannibal and kill Dolarhyde in this very moment.

His feelings after killing Dolarhyde caused him to throw himself and Hannibal off the cliff (personally, I think the fall didn't happen at all and is just a metaphor, but that's a topic for another post), knowing that he would never feel better.

This answer turned out to be longer than I thought, so tl;dr:

Yes, Will orchestrated the escape.

Will is driven by his feelings, curiosity and whims (as Chilton said in Hassun), so I think that he didn't have any bigger plan than freeing Hannibal and see what would happen and then ended up being driven by his feelings. So I would say that he neither planned to run away with Hannibal nor to kill him. He was acting on the spur of the moment. If Hannibal killed Dolarhyde? Great, one serial killer down. If Hannibal had killed both Dolarhyde and Will? Okay, they're finally free from each other. If Dolarhyde had killed him and Hannibal? Finally it was all over. But Dolarhyde killing Hannibal? Oh no, Will couldn't bear to look at it.

[beelijah4894]

I want to examine Chilcuck's change in relationship with Marcille

Quite frankly, I want to discuss the way his general trust changes and how it affects him.

Marcille and Chilcuck are good coworkers, especially at the start of the show. They respect boundaries and share a teasingly platonic relationship. Beyond that, they are fairly good friends; not extremely close but still good. For lack of a better explanation, they are close enough to be able to show genuine concern for the others comfortability rather than just their safety. For example, when Marcille is attack by the slime, Chilchuck offers his hanky to blow out the excess. Or when Marcille helped Chilchuck stitch up his neck wrap.

This show does a tremendous job of showing how these characters have already gotten to know each other and that they know each other well. When Chilchuck is trapped with the mimic, he trusts Marcille would be concerned enough to get help, but also knows her well enough to know she probably fell back asleep. Still, Chilchuck does trust these people. Enough even to share his age and very minor details about his life outside the dungeon.

A scene that really shows Chilchuck's trust in the group is right before the Undine attack when he is laying out the plan for the rest of the trip. It shows just how well they work together and Chil doesn't have to worry about too many details. He knows he is with a strong group. In fact, I'd say they are at their strongest right before and during the dragon attack. They make a plan together and work out each others strengths, in which Chil is able to help in the actual fight. (another less important fact, but when Laios is mentioning how they used to fight dragons, children isn't even named).

Then, the resurrection happens. Chilchuck is the number one person against it. So why does he stay? Why doesn't he stop it or leave the party? There are quite a few reasons. He can't go home without his party, he'd never survive. But he also doesn't want them to die and I think deep down, he does trust their judgement. They've stayed alive this long doing things he wasn't comfortable with and, while this is an extreme, he does have some form of trust there.

Chilchuck is such a follower of what is ethically right and he obviously doesn't agree with this. While, on the other side, Marcille thinks that "there is no morality in magic." It drives a stake through that bond because they both feel so strongly about it. And all of those adventures they had before almost don't matter when Chilchuck is talking to Laios about how, "[He] always found it strange. A well off elf girl wanting to explore the dungeon." (quote may not be exactly correct). Chil doesn't trust "that Marcille" anymore, at least, not as much as he used to. It doesn't help that she is frightening when she is walking the mini dragons away.

When Chil is complaining about his group to the orc (I can't remember her name, forgive me), he admits that they are consistently near death and how his party is reckless and stupid. We know now that he is afraid of losing them and was generally projecting his own feelings of fear. Marcille is included in this, as he complains about her. He, however, mentions her life after the dungeon. "How is she going to live a normal life after this?" He does care for her, but I believe he is projecting here also. How would he live a normal life after witnessing that. What would he do if they're found out?

And this is projected onto Marcille after a while. When Marcille is teaching Laios healing magic and Marcille and Chilchuck discuss party relationships. He implies that she shouldn't have even been let into the group. "I wish he had a better judge of character. That way he'd never find himself in a situation involving black magic." Not to mention in this episode, This being the shot after he says this. They are metaphorically further apart than they have been up until this point and Laios is right in the middle of it.

That friendship is still there. We can see it in places like when Marcille is just holding Chilchuck during the cleaners episode and he's not really angry. But that trust and fear is still there. We see in the Chimera episode, Chilchuck trying to let Marcille know about Shuro and a few others knowing what happened; he is still unhappy to be in this situation and wants to find a way out, but there really isn't a way out.

"I knew it. I had a feeling it would turn out like this. Dammit!"

"Sorry, guys…"

followed by Chilchucks defeated expression. No reassurance, but no fighting either.

This wasn't my best analysis but I am putting my one year of college to use!

I can't wait to see how this changes and expands. I am still only on anime right now, bc my manga are on back order but I'll get there soon enough! @burnazog

[bonaesperanza]

I feel like the Grysk work way better than the Yuuzhan Vong as the "nebulous threat" that Thrawn is fighting against because they are clearly tailor made to highlight how wrong Thrawn can be due to his own personal weaknesses.

The entire plot of the Ascendancy trilogy is the Grysk gaining footing through 100% political means - they use espionage to discover the internal divisions and weak points of a country's political system and then attack that, an issue that is probably better addressed through collaboration and the strengthening of the country's political culture and institutions (the Chiss are so quick to abandon their national interests in the face of internal divisions). Thrawn wins every single battle in that trilogy and yet everyone, including himself, is way worse off than where they started and at great risk from the Grysks simply because the Chiss political system is so unstable and because their culture sees collaboration with other races as fundamentally undesirable.

And what Thrawn, who is also either incapable of or completely uninterested in thinking about politics, concludes from all this is, "Ah, yes, this is a problem that can only be solved by throwing more military power at it. Preferably military power run by an authoritarian state that tries to eradicate any trace of political pluralism, because that will make them less vulnerable to the exploitation of the political actors' rivalries and personal interests."

And then he spends, what, fifteen years working with people like Tarkin and Krennic, while having to constantly extinguish rebellions that are popping up everywhere due to the Empire's oppressive policies, and still somehow thinks that the Grysks wouldn't be able to deal with the Empire easily. The Empire that didn't even need them to topple itself through internal conflict in less than a generation - if the Grysks wanted to conquer it, all they'd have to do is wait.

And after reading Lesser Evil I really think that at least part of it is due to some personal drives/needs he's not self-aware enough to address: he says it point-blank that he never believed the Ascendancy would give him an admiralship, and you see hints of his constant frustration at people not understanding him and him having to teach them (sometimes from a position of less power than they have, sometimes when they really don't care to be taught) both through Thrass's POV and through his very slight (but noticeable by his standards) emotional unraveling by the end of the book (e.s. the scene with Unghali where he gets all angry and scary).

Because he has never naturally arrived at the limit of his own competence but was always hamstrung by others, he has no means of differentiating between when he's theoretically right but the politics are obstructing him and when he's actually wrong and the solution is outside of his sphere of competence.

So of course that a political system where being a flag officer means that he gets to do whatever the fuck he wants as long as he convinces one guy of it, where he gets to teach people how to think better and pick only them for positions of power, in a country with no pesky norms about preemptive strikes that he constantly needs to rule lawyer around, sounds appealing.

It's not just about the Ascendancy now, it's also about showing what he can do when not too obstructed, and it's also the first time he has enough free reign to slam headfirst into the big wall of his own lack of capacity or desire to understand politics. But hey, at least he's free to fuck around and find out, not feeling constantly frustrated and overly controlled!

Truly the most character of all time, I love it. People complain about how Zahn babygirlified him in the new canon books just because they're from his POV when switching out the Vong for the Grysk makes him more unambiguously wrong than he was in Legends (where you got other people like Jacen Solo following the same rationale).

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️ Ranking Richonne

#15: I'm Gonna See/You Ready? (S5E11)

Ok, one last tie. 🤗 The Distance is one of the goated Richonne pre-canon episodes. I always enjoy this one for showing all throuhgout why Rick and Michonne are the most dynamic duo. They lead so well together as partners, parents, and as two people who genuinely care about each other. The episode has several great Richonne moments, but two specific ones get a tie for 15th place on this list because they're both really special...

(Also honorable mention to their scene at the top of this ep when they give married vibes as Michonne lets Rick know her look was not a "let's attack that man" look lol. I always love that Michonne knows her look at Rick might have played a part in him punching Aaron and that Rick has this brief entranced look at Michonne like he's making a mental note to get better at reading her looks. 😋)

Rick and Michonne were undeniably partners and co-leaders during this whole episode. And after Michonne makes the call and tells the group they're going to Alexandria, Rick co-signs and they share this look in the barn that suggests 'we should talk privately' - which leads to their lovely top 15 moment alone outside.

Their private moment outside the barn begins when Michonne approaches Rick, who is working on a car. He's immediately getting this Alexandria plan in motion because when Michonne convinces him of something, his mind is genuinely made up to do what she thinks is best. #RealOne.

I love how the first thing Rick says is stuff about the plan, showing he’s really up for this and not at all upset about Michonne taking charge of the group. In fact, Rick seemed somewhat alleviated (and low-key turned on lol) by Michonne taking the initiative earlier in the barn. Then he voices that he wants Michonne to be with him when driving with Aaron cuz of course. 🧲

Rick mentions how Carl and Judith are safer in the RV, and this just tells you loud and clear that they’re the parents. That was evident when Michonne mentioned not wanting to pass up a place for Judith to live in this ep and then with Rick talking about the kids here. Look at this beautiful mom and dad, y’all. 🥰

Michonne is silent hearing Rick say this, and I will forever love that Rick notices the silence, looks up at her, and so sweetly asks, “You okay?” Like she always matters to him and even after trusting her instinct over his own with the plan, he still wants to check in on her and ensure she’s good with everything.

Michonne knows she can be candid with Rick, so she asks if he was for real when saying they’re going. It’s sweet cuz right here she gets to learn just how much Rick continually trusts her and will follow her lead.

And then Rick stands up and assuredly says they’re going. Michonne wants to confirm that they’re going no matter what it takes, and what proceeds to me has always felt like this moment of Rick really letting Michonne into the thought process he often has as a leader because he officially knows that she's his co-leader now.

So he shares this important insight and leader perspective with her and does it by asking good questions rather than just outright stating it, which is great and effective. I really like the dialogue in this scene.

Rick asks her what she heard outside the gates of Woodbury and Terminus, and Michonne answers "Nothing" both times, quickly getting and respecting where Rick is going with this. Their communication is just A1, even when they have a few different feelings about things.

Rick tells her how sometime tonight without seeing inside the walls he’s going to have to decide whether to bring his family in. I love the way he emphasizes 'family' when he says this. The best family man on TV. 🙌🏽 And I love that Michonne is included in that family that he’s so passionately talking about.

And again, I talk a lot about how Rick looks at Michonne throughout the series cuz I adore it, and he’s super attentive to her in this scene - but y’all, the way Michonne looks at Rick is also just so passionate and filled with love and respect. They both have this arresting effect on each other, and I’m beyond here for it. 

Then I love this part where Rick says Aaron asked him what it would take to believe his offer is real, and he admits, “Truth is, I’m not sure if anything could convince me to go in there…but I’m gonna see. I’m gonna see.”  Tell me this scene is not giving romantic. ❤️‍🔥 The way he pauses and leans toward her as he says he’s going to see. He looks right into her eyes as he softly repeats, "I’m gonna see." It’s for her, y’all. 🥰

The reason I love this scene is because Rick is pretty much saying that there’s only one thing that could really get him to take this kind of a leap...and it’s her.

What would it take for him to believe it’s real? Michonne. What could convince him to go in there? Michonne. Why is he going to see? Michonne. Of course, he wants a great place for his family to call home too. But at this point, Rick doesn’t seem to trust that Aaron’s story is even legit, so he really is taking this big leap because he is willing to trust Michonne’s gut even over his own. 

It’s a big deal and this scene was just a beautiful exchange between them that really further watered the seed for how Rick and Michonne will continue to operate as leaders and sounding boards for each other.

Richonne was just in their bubble the whole episode, and I know as a newcomer Aaron had to be looking at the rest of team family like...

And then there isn’t a better way to end this Rick and Michonne-centered episode than with this moment right here. 😍 One of my all-time favorite endings to a TWD ep.

I love that the very first scene at Alexandria is one between the two who will lead this place. Rick and Michonne pull up to the gate and sit side by side in the car outside the place tf will call home for the next 6 seasons, the place where they will build their life as husband and wife and expand their family.

But without knowing just how much this community is going to work out for them, right now in this 5.11 moment, they're just preparing to take a huge leap of faith to try and make yet another community work after experiencing many a fallen community.

Just from the jump, I’ve always loved that Rick and Michonne were in this car with their kids while the rest of TF was in the RV. It’s already setting them up as this inner family unit. Like there's found family among the whole group which is a beautiful thing - but then there's immediate family which for Rick is the three people in this car with him.

In this car are the people Rick feels most fiercely protective of which is why he wants the three of them with him as they approach this unknown territory.

Also I know Richonne didn’t become canon until they entered those Alexandria gates but, truly, in this moment they were already a couple. It was so clear, and it was only a matter of time before they called it what it was. 

They pull up to the spot, and Andy just does incredible acting with his eyes alone as his face softens upon hearing kids playing on the other side of the wall. 👏🏽 Andy really should have won every award for his acting throughout the series, but especially for his work in season 5.

Something subtle I’ve always loved about this moment is the fact that Rick is already looking at Michonne once the car stops. I used to think it was her putting her hand on his that grabbed his attention. But no. Even before then, in this extremely stressful moment for Rick where he has to fight to put his PTSD and paranoia aside and bravely go and see for the sake of his family - what does he do?...he looks to Michonne. 😊

She led him here. And he needs her reassurance right now. After all, pretty much the only reason he’s outside these gates right now is because of her.

Rick’s the leader who often has to put his own fear aside for the sake of his people, but here he can be a guy who's anxious and needs some reassurance cuz what they’re about to do is risky.

And because Michonne is his elegant and calming soulmate she gives him such precious reassurance when she takes his hand and smiles and asks, “You ready?” 😊

I appreciate that she asks him the question and how it’s also this motivational encouragement. And I love that this is Michonne's first time initiating this type of physical contact with him. That touch alone shows they’ve come a long way and she has come to trust and feel comfortable with Rick so much since her "don’t you ever touch me again" days in season 3.

And the smile and everything just feels like that attraction, that “something more,” that magnetic connection between them is slowly but surely becoming fully realized. The way she does this just communicates loud and clear that these two are in it together. Whatever’s on the other side of that ASZ gate - and I do mean whatever it may be - Rick and Michonne are going to get through it and ultimately come out stronger and closer than ever because they have each other to guide them. 

Another poetic element of this to me is that Michonne knows what it's like to walk up to a fence and not know exactly what you're going to find on the other side. That was her experience arriving at the prison in season 3.

But by showing up at those prison gates, she found something more valuable than gold - she found her family and the love of her life. The leap Michonne took to show up to a new place more than paid off.

And now here she is, side by side with Rick this time, and facing a new gate. And she's able to instill hope that this gate too can have good on the other side. 👌🏽

Also, it hit me that yes this is a shining moment of Michonne’s calming presence in Rick’s life - But Rick’s words also have an impact on Michonne too.

In that “I’m gonna see” scene, Rick tells Michonne how not hearing silence outside a community doesn’t necessarily mean it’s safe. So when they’re outside Alexandria, the fact that they hear children laughing and playing is a sign for not just Rick but Michonne too that this is different from those other places. I feel like she's recalling his words at this moment and finding comfort in them.

And to make even more of a connection, Michonne knows how reassuring it can be to see kids in the community cuz when she showed up at the prison, I truly believe that Carl and Judith being there and cared for by all the adults in the group is a factor in helping her know this place was more genuine than others.

Her conversation with Rick and the valuable insights he imparted helps her to feel more confident about getting out of this car and taking on this community. And she’s able to transfer that energy to Rick like only she can. 

After receiving the calming reassurance from Michonne, which always resonates with him, Rick then nods and gets out and goes to grab Judith and takes this huge game-changing step to enter this new community.

The power and love between Rick and Michonne is what got them here. Richonne is what got the entire group to their new home. And I love that in that sedan was the greatest family the show has seen. And once they entered those gates they’d only become more and more of a family. 👌🏽

In retrospect, I love this closing 5.11 scene for being the moment Alexandria got their king and queen. 👑 Those two upgraded the heck out of this place over the course of the seasons, to where it became a community that really thrived.

Don’t get me wrong, Alexandria threw them some obstacles when they first arrived, but they overcame them because when Rick and Michonne are united, this power couple can rise above anything. 

These two tied scenes show the way that Rick and Michonne are truly co-leaders and partners who care so much about each other as human beings and are in it together always. And I love that these scenes served as this reminder that Rick and Michonne are only growing closer and have something special between them that will flourish even more once they take the leap. 😌

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Meryl, Luida, and Bridging the Gap

This is just a quick little side-note I wanted to make about the similarities between Meryl and Luida that I noticed as I was reading, and how they end up occupying similar, yet complementing roles in the story.

***Disclaimer: I was sick when I wrote this and my head is full of fog lmao. If I have completely left out a word or something... don't even worry about it it's fine.

First off, on a surface level, they both are characterized as capable, intelligent, level-headed women, who are suddenly thrust into leadership positions, with Meryl being assigned the task of tracking down and mitigating the damage caused by Vash the Stampede plus looking out for her new protégé, Milly, and Luida stepping up to take charge of Ship 3 and its residents after Doc's death.

While the demand placed on them both is immense, nonetheless, they are shown to be quite capable of shouldering this kind of responsibility - however, given their intense focus and objective-driven personalities, they actually both get scenes where they are somewhat horrified by their own temporary prioritization of objectives over morality. We see this with Meryl in Trigun Volume 1 when she doesn't react in righteous anger to Badwick threatening his parents and had shut herself off from writing to her own in pursuit of her job, and with Luida when she briefly considers the idea of another July incident to stop Knives. Both think negatively of themselves for this - of course, I'm of the mind that since they are upset with themselves on reflection, this proves the exact opposite, really. I think they both have hearts of gold, they're just under a lot of stress, especially as time goes on. The two of them are human beings who falter, but whose morals ultimately align closely with what Vash wants to see in the world. Really, what the two of them hate most here is the idea of their own inaction or taking the easy way in the face of wrongdoing - a concept that drives them into action going forward.

[ID: Two images from Trigun and Trigun Maximum. The first is from Trigun Volume 1. Over images of trees and Badwick's father, Meryl says "But I... I just stood there and took it all in without even budging. I am such a cold person. I chose this path of blood and tears without thinking about the rest of my life. All I can see is what's right in front of me." Meryl starts to cry as she continues, "Why could I not see... that when I closed myself off to him, something was wrong? I..." She then slaps her cheeks and says "No... never mind!" The second image is from Trigun Maximum Volume 8. A single tear runs down Luida's cheek. Meryl says "Miss Luida...?" Her back turned to Meryl, Luida says "I'm sorry. I... was thinking for a moment. If something like July would happen again... it could stop Knives, but... ... I'm a terrible woman. End ID.]

Both of them also have a connection to Vash's past that gives them a different perspective on him as a person, instead of just an ally - Meryl, of course, gets brain-blasted in Volume 5 with Vash's memories (poor thing), but Luida is also more familiar with him than even a lot of the people on Ship 3, it seems - enough that she calls him out for blaming himself after the attack, clearly used to hearing this from him. She also is the one to clear up at least some of Wolfwood's confusion and uncertainty.

We also get this interesting parallel of them both watching Vash walk away to face Knives, him having rejected their offers of help. It's something that clearly saddens them both, as they watch him fight alone again and again, and wish he wouldn't. Both of them have moments where they feel they can't offer much in the way of assistance, or that their best efforts aren't enough.

[ID: Two images from Trigun and Trigun Maximum. The first is from Trigun Volume 2. Vash, his back turned, runs off into the chaos, a Plant seen above him and the city ahead, as he yells back "Get as far away from here as you can! Get to safety!" Meryl watches him from the door. In the second image, from Trigun Maximum Volume 8, a grainy flashback shows Vash's turned back as he walks away from a young Luida, who is reaching out to him. End ID.]

Of course, we the readers know this isn't true at all! Meryl and Luida do so much over the course of the story.

Interestingly, they don't start off as the ones completely in charge - Meryl works for Bernadelli even if she is in charge of her assignment, and Luida is presumably part of the Council, but the one in charge is initially Doc. But once they do take over - Luida after Doc's death, and Meryl once the world is thrown into ruins and Bernadelli no longer exists - there is a striking difference in the way they act from their predecessors.

Meryl goes from simply following Vash around to taking a self-directed and active role in assisting him however she can - looking for his old belongings and anything else of potential use, asking Marlon to repair his gun, creating a distraction with Milly, and helping the Earth Federation in the final hour with no hesitation.

Luida takes a much more active role in rallying Ship 3 to assist Vash as well. While some of this may simply have been because the stakes were raised much higher after Volume 3, Ship 3, while already a base of support for Vash, was a distant safe haven, kept largely separate from the rest of the world. Up until that point, they had provided Vash with aid, but not fought alongside him, something that clearly bothers Luida on multiple occasions. She decides to change this. She's the one who sets out to help as many of the towns ravaged by the Ark as possible. She rallies the Ship 3 residents for a rescue mission to help Vash. She's the one to step forward and attempt to bring all the leaders around to standing with Vash.

Which brings me to my last comparison point. They're both staunchly supportive of Vash, quick to come to his aid, and quick to defend his character from those who doubt his intent - Luida even sharply calls out her own people for their moment of mistrust after hearing about July. These two know and care about Vash on a more personal level than most - and as we all know, due to his avoidant tendencies, this is not an easy thing to do. Vash is frequently misinterpreted, and these two are often the ones to set the record straight.

[ID: A panel from Trigun Maximum Volume 3. Luida, sternly, says "That's a foolish question. You would know the answer just by looking at the scars on his body. If he had used his true immortality, those scars would not be there. End ID.]

In this way, much like Vash is a bridge between humans and Plants, Meryl and Luida are something of a bridge between humans and Vash.

And they're able to do this because deep down, their ideals align closely with his - they're not just supporting someone they care about; they have a similar desire to see the kind of world he fights for, and they choose to fight for it too.

But while Luida is something of a spokesperson for Vash, reaching out to humanity, it is almost as if Meryl becomes the voice of humanity reaching back, responding to him, and agreeing that not everything in the world is awful; that it is worth believing in the best in others. They need to stand together.

[ID: A panel from Trigun Maximum Volume 14. Meryl, in a spacesuit, with frank determination, says, "Because we decided to stand together. We stand with Vash the Stampede." End ID.]

Meryl is the voice of proof that some people believe in the love and peace he speaks of, and are willing to say it back to him in turn.

Updated on my masterpost - my other book club stuff can be found here!

[daphnebowen]

percy jackson episode five thoughts

I skipped a couple episodes where I wrote down my thoughts, but I'm about to rewatch and write don't worry! warning: lots of screaming, fangirling, heart attacks, and nonsense below :))

also these are all just copied straight from the notebook I use when I'm writing down my thoughts and I barely proofread them :)

Annabeths trust in Percy being alive is literally just like her belief that Luke is alive later on and even though it's kinda sorta different (or at least people are gonna treat it that way) I'm all here for it

WHY WERE THE FATES SO CREEPY HELLO

AAAAAHHHH THE PERCABETH HUGGGG I IGNORED SO MANY SPOILERS AND IM SO GLAD 2 minutes in and I'm already fangirling so hard haha

is Grover blushing at them??

"surprise" omg Walker 😭🥹

the droplet of water clinging to walkers chin is so distracting

"I'm the last person to realize this aren't I?" It's okay Percy

his eyes are SO FREAKING BLUE it's giving zac efron from hsm2

"it doesn't have to be a thing, yk. That you hugged me." OHKAY HES NOT ENTIRE CLULESS THIS IS FAN SERVICE RIGHT HERE WE KNOW THAT IT MOST ABSOLUTELY WILL BE A THING LMAO and annabeths "oh boy" and Grover's clear exasperation HAHAH

where the heck did the motorcycle go lol we know it's ares but like it doesn't take that long to drive

"we're all gonna die... eventually" wise words Percy wise words

ugh the fact that it's Luke's string 💔

Ares ‼️‼️‼️

Ok but why is ares literally EXACTLY how I thought he would be?!?!

"that's my cousin? what kind of family is this?" A dysfunctional one for sure, sorry Percy you're in for a rough ride

ares starting a fight on twitter is ABSOLUTELY CRAZY and yet so in character lmao

"I'm gonna kill him" same Percy SAME I will gladly help you - although all things considered I am glad they decided to keep delinquent percy in the show

they keep bringing up the "push someone down a flight of stairs" thing! There's no way this is just a coincidence anymore, what with chalice of the gods and earlier on with Annabeth and like... they're obviously doing it on purpose. is that gonna be the shows new thing?? trusting someone enough so that if they can push you down the stairs they're the one? idk man, love the metaphor tho

PLS LET THERE BE THE ZOO TRUCK SCENE OH MY PLS

leah's eyebrow quirk is 💋

WATERLAND IS PERFECT OMG

walker portrayed Percy's anxiety and nervousness and scaredness (is that a word?) perfectly

Can't tell if Grover is actually a history buff or playing Ares so he will talk but that scene was actually cool, I like the change they made to have Grover stay behind (this was what I wrote originally, but now after seeing peoples interpretations and opinions and things I know he was playing ares and I think it's BRILLIANT how smartly he played the god of war. Good for you buddy!)

"I didn't say anything" "I can feel you thinking it" OHKAY THEN

thrill ride of love = flawless. No words. I am speechless.

"I hate kids" relatable

ARES IS ACTUALLY BEING SMART AND MAKING SENSE FOR ONCE not to mention he's so funny and so relatable!

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH SEAWEED BRAIN ALERT 🚨 SEAWEED BRAIN ALERT 🚨 SHE CALLED HIM SEAWEED BRAIN AND I LOVED IT never mind the actual SCREAM i let out lmao

is Annabeth about to cry?!?!

yeah she's definitely about to cry

why am I so scared. This cannot be happening. What?? What??? he's the main character. main characters don't die. well except for Magnus chase BUT THOSE ARE DIFFERENT GODS AND DIFFERENT RULES NO WALKER

why am I actually so scared about this chair thing omg

(I would just like to say that I was so speechless and in shock throughout the whole chair thing, so I didn't write down a single quote but I loved them all I just was in too much shock to pause the show lol)

um.

WHAT. JUST. HAPPENED.

WHY IS MY BABY GOLD

WHY IS MY CHILD GOLDDDD

I AM SO CONFUSED RIGHT NOW THIS DEFINITELY DIDNT HAPPEN IN THE BOOKS MY BRAIN IS TOO SLOW FOR THIS 😭😭😭

oh my gosh ITS HEPHEASTUS

dude the way that door suddenly opened scared the crap out of me

leah is absolutely shining as Annabeth, her monologue was so profound and heartfelt, love that addition 💗

THAT CLIFFHANGER GOES CRAZYYYY

okay of course those of us who read the books know who really stole the lightning bolt and stuff but the clueless fools just watching the show are gonna be like OMG WHO WHO and even if they piece it together technically they'll only be half right. and their confusion and confidence in what they think they know is going to be SO entertaining in the coming weeks hehehehe and even throughout the whole series if we continue to get green lights for the series

but yes that episode was utter perfection! Now for the teaser...

WHO DID PERCY JUST TACKLE EXCUSE ME

duuuuude. The lotus casino is MASSIVE and actually super pretty I cannot wait for the episode tomorrow!

WHY IS PERCY DRIVING OMG THIS IS NOT LEGAL although tell me why he is literally better at driving than I am HAHAHAHAHAH

ugh and that is it! Those are all my random thoughts from the episode! thanks for reading :))

[burst-of-iridescent]

so i just went through your entire anti-lok tag and everything you said in it was SO WELL WRITTEN. i wanted to ask if you might have any analyses or anything (or just good old rants! we love being bryke haters) - about something that i noticed, which is this sort of... ATLA/TLOK dichotomy between how all aang's villains seem to be focused on gaining power/dominating the world or whatever, but the villains in TLOK seem to revolve around very pointed targeting of korra and specifically stripping her of her agency/bodily autonomy, but i don't know how to expand on that point.

(idk just. TLOK has a whole list of scenes that make me VIOLENTLY uncomfortable in a way even the worst of ATLA doesn't? and i thought you might have some input to share about it, if you don't mind me asking)

thank you sm!! i'm glad you enjoy my lok and bryke salt <33

i know what you mean, because it's something that struck me when i was watching lok as well. korra's villains are far more personal to her (particularly in what they do to her, or want from her) than azula or ozai or even zhao ever were to aang, and while that isn't necessarily a bad thing (in fact it can often be good to have a personal relationship between your hero and villain; just look at how much more impactful and meaningful zuko and azula's arc was compared to aang and ozai's), there is a way to do it right and that was... not what bryke did.

we didn't need to see korra brutally bloodbent and stripped of her bending, or brutally attacked by unalaq, or brutally tortured by the red lotus or - you got it - brutally beaten up by kuvira (over and over again, might i add). i'm not saying that violence never has its place in storytelling, but it needs to have an actual purpose that's not just shock value. atla, for instance, knew when and how to utilise violence: the sight of gyatso's skeleton in the southern air temple, aang's murder by azula, even katara bloodbending... the violence in all of those scenes was necessary either to communicate vital information to the audience, or drive home the emotive and narrative significance of the moment, or both.

in lok though, bryke hardly, if ever, achieved either of these objectives - especially because it was mainly only ever korra who got the brunt of the violence. no other character is repeatedly targeted and assaulted and violated even half as much as korra is, even when they're facing the same antagonists. tenzin's fight against the red lotus in book 3 gets a tasteful pan to black (one of the few times i think bryke did use violence purposefully; knowing what not to show is just as important as knowing what to show, and leaving the audience with the dread of tenzin's fate was actually sadder and more terrifying than letting us see what happened to him) but korra's agonizing torture at the hands of the red lotus is so long and drawn-out that it begins to veer into torture porn.

imo, this can probably be attributed to two things: 1) bry.ke thinking trauma = character development because they don't know how else to write a good character arc (and they still somehow fucked it up - i will never forgive them for making korra thank zaheer, of all people, for helping her overcome her trauma, like what the absolute fuck bry.ke), and 2) they wanted lok to be "more mature" than atla, which shows both that they fundamentally didn't understand atla, or what constitutes good storytelling, and also that someone desperately needs to tell them that simply upping the violence and hamfistedly handling "complex" topics does not maturity make.

(given the way bryke has written women, i also have to side-eye the fact that the strong-willed, independent, brown female protagonist is beaten and battered and torn down far more than the peaceful, affable light-skinned male protagonist ever is, even during an actual war.)

and of course, contrary to what our dear bryke probably expected, simply brutalizing korra season after season in the name of shock value and development did not, to anyone else's surprise, make lok the better show in the end.

[soulflame22]

hey! ive been super fixated on aot, so here is my deep dive into episode one of attack on titan. this is mostly the foreshadowing things but there are some extras.

MAJOR AOT SPOILERS AHEAD

• the title being: "To you, in 2,000 years" i am assuming "to you" is related to ymir fritz as "2000 years" is how many years since ymir got the shifters. my best theory with this is its ymir talking to armin possibly? armin and mikasa did what she could never do and killed off "the one they were in love with" the one who had all the power and was abusing it. armins the narrator in the first 3 seasons so i think thatd make sense. ive looked into what other peoples theories were and there are definitely quite a few, but this is the one that makes the most sense to me.

• in the opening scene birds are flying around. when eren wakes up, they scatter away from him. the birds represent freedom, and they're taunting him

• before eren opens his eyes he has a quick flashback, a bunch of things in the so called future that happen. this is in reference to how he sees the past the present and the future all at once. he got flashes of what was going to happen in the future.

• when eren wakes up, he says he forgot what he was dreaming about, and then mikasa brings up he was crying. this had more to do with the founding titan power, "it wasn't his time yet to know". but he was crying regardless because all of the tragedies that will await him (mikasa brings up this again in the episode)

• during this scene hes also sitting at the base of the tree he was later burried at

• throughout the first episode, even before the walls got attacked, you can see erens drive. a lot of people have been asking how much of what happened was eren and how much was the founding titan. he yells at hannes showing his anger and passion about what may be outside the walls. he goes to attack a man, goes to attack armins bullies, and he fights back as hard as he can when hannes is dragging him away from his mother. it is clear he is very passionate about those who he cares about in the beginning of the series, and in the end.

• erwin is seen in this episode after coming back from outside the walls. all throughout this episode people are saying that no new information is being learned and people are dying for nothing. but erwin didnt believe that. ever since his father taught young erwin about his theories, erwin thought there was something new outside the walls, some sort of secret. and he was right.

• eren throughout this episode keeps bringing up the outside of the walls. before his mom even died, he wanted to know. but it was something more than just the average curiosity. when grisha offers to show him whats in the storage, his eyes light up. more with the founding titan subconsciously leading him down the unfortunate past

• this encounter - bully: "or does your philosophy say its wrong to fight back too?" armin: "as a matter of fact it does, I rather take a few bumps then brawl like a beast!" i just think this encounter is ironic. parts of it do hold true, he does try to talk things through always before fighting, but in the end he did have to fight. and he did a lot of it.

• mikasas ackerman blood is also apparent in this episode. people are naturally intimidated by her because of how strong she was at such a young age. after all, fighting does run in their blood.

• "besides whats beyond the wall tends to put the issue into a different perspective" -hannes. this is interesting to me because hannes said it in a shallow way, referring to how stupid the titans were. but the people outside the walls do view things from a completely different perspective then them. he was right, even though he didn't mean to be

• armin called it: "[talking about how the walls are a false sense of security] and make no mistake, it absolutely is fleeting. the walls can't hold forever. only a matter of time" right after this is said, the collasal titan appears. but i think it's also interesting because he's right, the walls DIDN'T hold. instead the titans within them left them crumbling, destroying them entirely

• the collasal titan is huge, they would have seen it approaching, but it just seemed to appear. it also seemes to just disappear. this is in reference to the shifting power of titans

• erens immediate thought was to go down to his house to save his mom. the irony here being he was the one who sent the smiling titan (aka dina fritz) there.

• carla (erens mom) legs seemed to be crushed and broken under the house, but when the titan lifts her, she seems to be moving her legs just fine. were they just not crushed that badly? or was she trying to save eren and mikasa?

[our-reb00t-boi]

What would happen if Astarion met the reboot twins? 😍😁😂

Hello!! Apologies, late reply but this is interesting!

Idk much of Baldur's Gay--- I mean Baldur's Gate but all the ones I saw are from people shipping and

All I "know" of the game is it's a AAA high fantasy dating simulator adventure game.

And all I know about Astarion is that he's a more flowery flamboyant version of V from dmc 5 in terms of being a fanged flowery goth man

Sorry V no hard feelings

You guys can correct me about the game. I don't have this🙏😂

Astarion to Dante:

I think at 1st they won't go well together, as friends or as dates. I think the differences in how they approach people is a river that the other may not be able to cross.

I think Dante finds Astarion's flamboyant nature to be annoying but he quietly just deals with it. He also observes a lot and may find Astarion suspicious.

Astarion is a cunning man and Dante can smell that from a mile away. He has trust issues and the 2 of them would've likely tried to attack the other, if Dante was the one who makes a spicy rebuttal or if Astarion was tricking or gaslighting Dante (to bite his skin lmaoo)

The only way they'd probably bond over something is a mutual agreement on revenge. And also something at least utilitarian/useful to benefit one another besides a shared goal.

Another thing that could make them get together in a more intimate level is that Astarion can acknowledge Dante's sexuality. Anyone reading this can interpret this anyway they can. But I believe both Astarion and Dante are hedonistic, and physical desires are itches they want scratching. And Astarion could possibly do something about that young sex drive Dante has. And I think Dante's not off about how anything goes, if the both of them play their cards right. Or with lots of pizza and booze.

Astarion to Vergil:

This one gets complicated, or specifically their particular psychological traits (and issues) are gonna come into play with these 2.

I think at first everything looks smooth at first glance. They have a mutual understanding of one another and respect one another. You almost don't hear anything bad about how the other thinks on the other. They're both very classy people, they're into playing with semantics and probably acknowledge the other for their tastes.

But even them being acquaintance is very surface level. Vergil behind the scenes is secretly working on making background checks about Astarion, his life, his former relationships, his stats, etc. Vergil is careful about him, but he doesn't show how he's skeptical about this elf-vampire.

Astarion on the other hand has always been dry about their mutual-ness, if that's a word. He's entertained by this young genius with high standards and he gets a kick out of trying to break Vergil's cool sometimes, especially if Astarion can try to go skin deep (or literally try to sink his fangs)

I think their bond is going to be very complicated. Astarion knows Vergil's type: he has a keenness for control and not wanting to submit to anything. And Vergil knows that Astarion is the type who will do something unpredictable when backed against the corner.

Perhaps Astarion can roleplay around and make Vergil feel like the boss of him as a one time only thing, if you catch my drift. Vergil, on the other hand, doesn't mind playing and learning some secret tricks so long as Vergil is getting some benefits. But after that, they're relationship remains in this ice-cold social game of chess, where they appear like everything is hunky dory.

[forcebookish]

so I just went back to watch the ray/mew scene at the end bc I wanted to double check that ray actually doesn't apologize for shit and guess what? he really doesn't. he gives a weak "I'm sorry for calling you dumb" but that doesn't count. no I'm sorry for using your vulnerabilities to my advantage, no I'm sorry for screaming at you and thinking I was entitled to sex, no I'm sorry for cheating on you. mew was the one who did all the apologizing. and he also went to cheum and apologized to her (and I'm glad he did...when will ray btw) and also admitted he was fucked up and lost. so far him and top are the only characters that own up to what they do and actually apologize and try to change. hopefully that's what will help their relationship last too.

it's at the point where it feels on purpose the way that ray will apologize for the tiniest part of an offense to diminish how horribly he acted.

'i'm sorry for driving drunk,' but not for shoving you to the ground and calling you a whore. <- HAHAHAHA I FORGOT THAT HE LITERALLY DIDN'T APOLOGIZE TO SAND AT ALL. I WENT TO LOOK FOR A SCREENCAP AND HE ONLY WHINES ABOUT BEING SCOLDED FOR DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE AND THANKS SAND FOR SAVING HIS LIFE. HE THINKS THAT THANKING SOMEONE IS ENOUGH OMFG. what a repugnant person lol

'i'm sorry for not telling you i was in a car accident,' but not for exposing your secrets to your partners and yelling at all of you.

'i'm sorry for nearly getting you arrested,' but not for forcefully kissing you and acting like i owned you.

'i'm sorry for calling you dumb,' but not for shouting at you for not having sex with me.

and look! oftentimes, he'll only apologize after he's scolded for it!! and even then he'll do it in the most whiny, juvenile way!

even when he apologized to mew for kissing him when he was asleep, did he do it because he actually felt bad about doing something wrong or because he was afraid he'd lose mew? i think we know the answer to that.........

this seems to be a pattern with mewray's relationship: mew easily forgives ray no matter what shit he does, ray barely apologizes, and mew apologizes for shit that's not even his fault. (LIKE RAY DRINKING AT MEW'S BIRTHDAY??????????? I'M STILL SO PISSED ABOUT THAT!!!! MEW THAT WAS NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT YOUR FAULT OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING BEFORE PUNCHING HIM... WHICH YOU DID WHEN HE WAS PHYSICALLY ATTACKING YOUR BOYFRIEND!!! HE FUCKING DESERVED IT!!) ray keeps taking advantage of mew and mew just... lets him. everyone in ray's life lets him get away with EVERYTHING. cheum at least chewed him out, but is she going to stay friends with him outside of the project? i fucking hope not.

and i agree, anon! the way that topmew own up to their shit is one of the reasons they were able to stay together in the first half of the series at all. despite both being pretty confident (obviously they do have insecurities, but they're not overwhelming), they don't really have egos? or at least not ones that can be easily bruised. there are multiple times in their relationship where they either hurt the other or overstep boundaries and apologize.

they don't act like they lose anything by admitting when they're wrong. they just know: i made the person i like feel bad, i want to make it up to him. no one has to cajole the other into an apology, they just know that they've done wrong and they own it. that's what makes a strong relationship.

and that's what's made the divorced era so heart-wrenching. of course top wants to get back together, but it's obvious that what hurts the most is how much he hurt mew. top sees the effect it's had on mew and it breaks his heart; all these good moments between them go up in smoke in mew's eyes; he spirals out of control and the world around him collapses. it's more than just losing mew, it's that mew is losing himself.

it's a really stark difference from what's going on with sandray, right? ray is doing everything within his power to keep sand in his life, and is it for sand's sake? nope. it's for ray. does he admit he has a problem? nope. does he apologize for every way he's hurt sand? nope nope nope 🙄

thanks for popping in, anon! i like to keep track of how little of the shit that ray actually apologizes for lmao he's so infuriating but you aren't🥰🥰🥰

[postsforposting]

Tying together the big miracle energy, the weird out of character behavior, and the time jumps

Originally I was going to say that they switched places multiple times, because the clock during the kiss and the bentley at the end seem to point to that, but that does not make sense: the bentley would not have changed if they swapped early on, it would have been Crowley in the bentley when it changed who thus would not have changed it; demons don't have demon-dissolving halos to throw so they can't be swapped at that point; the bentley actually changed its interior and 2-to-4-door style as Az was driving it, and stayed that way after that scene, it did not only change in that last scene at the end.

So that's out. But they do still behave out of character, starting right after the Jim hiding miracle. What gives, if they aren't swapped?

OG Crowley is dramatic, but he's emotionally dramatic, he doesn't fling himself around the room or gratituously talk with his hands like Az does. Az is notoriously a hand talker, but he's weirdly restrained this season? Like good angels should be. Crowley walks away from Az during the first Job flashback, while Az is paging through whatever bible/diary/book he's looking at--but Crowley always waits! He doesn't here.

Again, this is not evidence they've swapped bodies. This is evidence that they're behaving out of character. Az also only ever drinks the sherry in the pub, but nothing else the entire season: not the eccles cakes, not his own appetizers at the meeting.

After the hiding miracle, Crowley says something a little odd: "That was a class A surreptitious half a miracle. No one will have noticed a thing". That's not the kind of language he uses? Az talks olde timey like that, Crowley's usually more "no one could have seen that". Perhaps they are rubbing off on each other though. Later when Az asks Maggie about the song, she starts crying, and he reacts with confusion, when just the previous day he was easily comforting her when she was in a torrent of tears. Crowley is also the jumper when startled, established in the first scene he meets Jim; Az does not jump; and yet right after hiding Jim, Jim easily startles Az simply by walking up to him. This does not make sense. What is the point????

Az also does things like throwing down books at the demons, giving books away, and being surprised that Crowley came back despite just having told Nina that Crowley loves rescuing him. You don't say that and then be surprised he came to rescue you. Az also is pretty terrible at talking to people this whole season except for the first meeting with Maggie, aka before the big miracle energy--which isn't normal, because we've seen him talk to people easily last season: talking to Anathama after they hit her with the Bentley, talking to Maggie as she said she would leave due to unpaid rent, calming people down during the demon attack on the shop, talking to people in the flashbacks even though he does screw things up--that's not being bad at talking to people, that's treating people badly because of his beliefs.

What has the huge miracle to do with all this? It's over the entire shop, it's not just summon-circle-shaped, it is rectangular shop shaped. Enhance, and you can see the circle within the purple beam.

I think someone else cast a miracle on the shop, or did one in the shop, that affects not only our heroes but also the entire present. And thus altered people's recollection of the past.

What was the miracle for? Prepping for Jesus, putting people back in line with God's wants, erasing pesky things that would make it really hard to get Az to work with heaven. I think it was Metatron. It would explain why he's so pissy with Crowley and seems unbothered by Az having worked with Crowley in the past--he's already stacked the deck and knows what's going to happen when he asks Az to come up.

It explains why the miracle was so powerful, and why Crowley and Az didn't know they did it.....because they didn't. It also explains why Metatron wouldn't let them miracle a solution for finding Gabriel, because the twat already had other plans--he couldn't have Michael running the show, so he buys time by making the angels hunt physically. It's half a day, maybe, from when Jim shows up to when they miracle-hide him. But if you have the power of altering the past and present to set up your coup, you have all the time in the world to lay your plans so long as you throw your wrench in early enough.

How does Metatron do it? If the rules of etiquette work as they traditionally have, then Metatron was invited into the shop back in s1 when Az called him. He's never had to leave, because once invited, that can't be revoked--as we saw in s2 with the demons.

This would explain why people aren't seen paying for anything in the present, but we do see people paying for stuff in the past and in s1. This is why Az doesn't eat in the present, and only has a single sherry outside the shop, why the eccles cakes seem to have disappeared. Metatron/God does not like these things: money is dirty, eating sullies the temple of your body. Etc.

And also perhaps why the shop chairs, clock and rugs are different than in s1, although I don't know if that's because the shop can change according to Az's will just like the Bentley does for Crowley. Perhaps the chair and the clock reflect Crowley's hair, hence the pointyness and redness? The new chair is patterned with roses and gold. I don't have an explanation for the portal rugs, other than maybe they're shittier because Az is growing farther from heaven.

I think the missing time we see in the present, as gets EXTRA obvious after Crowley gets back from heaven in s2e6 and we can see the clock in the shop but does show up as early as the apology dance, is because of Metatron's miracle to edit events to his liking. In the past, this results in shaky cam; in the present, it's simply missing time, because there are no memories of it when you're doing it as it happens, so there is nothing it can affect in the "future". The present shows up as deleted time; those who lost their memories, have nothing, and those who do remember what happened retain "true" reality but don't know why their buddies are acting weird.

The shaky cam is the effects of edits to those memories, thus making them unstable, hence the shaking. It's not just that one of them is nervous or upset during those times, because it shakes when we see Furfur too, before they know he's there. It is also clearly not the result of earthquake or big booms in the scene, aka Watsonian shaking, because the characters do not react to this shaking at all, like they did in s1 when Crowley stopped time and stuff shook. There's the most shaking in 1941 because the cumulative edits are adding up, making the memory unstable, OR it's because that's where the most edits are because that's a "core memory" anchoring their relationship. There's shakes in the resurrectionists too, briefly in a few spots. Before the Beginning also has shakes, the whole scene is bookended by shakes, but they appear to be caused by the nebula starting up--or are they? Or are the shakes/edits being hidden in the floaty bouncy nature of the lack of solid ground, so the person remembering the memory doesn't notice them? The Job flashback also has shakes, during Crowley tempting Az to eat, during their subsequent conversation about "going along as far as you can"--no one stumbles, unlike when they all fall through the floor to the cellar. These particular two are supposedly during a huge storm, but the ground isn't what's shaking, neither character loses their footing. It's not a....Watsonian shake.

The shakes could also be attempts and failures to edit those memories, or they could indicate a recovered memory--a shaky memory is a painful memory, and would explain why it hurts to remember things that were wiped from your mind. Naturally Metatron would want to edit the most powerful memories Crowley and Az have, one of which we know is the 1941 memory. But powerful memories are also ones you'd be motivated to hold on to the most, the hardest to erase, perhaps the easiest to regain, perhaps the easiest to notice the furniture has been moved. So it's the most gain, but also the most risk of being found out by the target.

In the present, the missing time is:

a bunch of time around the apology dance and the Jim hiding miracle;

the night of the attack on the shop--there wasn't nearly enough time for that to be a whole 12 hours, but we don't know where the missing time itself is because there aren't any markers;

between Gabriel opening the fly memories and the next time we see the shop, there's ~45 minutes passing on the shop clock that don't make sense there because only two minutes of show time happen; were they all standing around gawping at each other in silence?

and when Crowley takes Nina and Maggie out as everyone argues in the shop, when he gets back from merely stepping outside for a second, another hour and 20-40 min has passed, you see a frame of the clock at 30:27 but it's not clear where the minute hand is; this is when Maggie says she's going for milk

20min seems to pass between then and the demons leaving, which seems too much given it's two minutes of real time; this is when Maggie gets back from "going to the shop for milk"--two hours for a simple errand???; here we see a proper 9am on the clock in the shop;

the next missing time is during the kiss, where between the start and end the clock jumps 10 minutes from 925 to 935;

and finally between the time when Crowley leaves and Metatron enters, when the clock jumps from 935 to 945.

Speaking of weird stuff, if you look at the people when Crowley is doing his lightning tantrum, all of them are also looking at him, but not before Nina says "look at him". Either everyone can see him, so it's not just N&M who are weird around miracles here, or everyone can only see it because Nina said so.

Here is Crowley's watch at time marker 4854 ep6, from when he's standing outside the shop watching Az be indecisive in front of the elevator. I did some terrible editing to see the hands better, because this style of watch is a bitch to read, and it seems to say it's 925--the flippy thing on the 3 is the decoration on the face not the hand, IMO. The last time we saw on the shop clock before this shot was 935, again with the hour hand in the wrong spot. When the shop clock said 925, that just before the kiss.

This means Crowley is missing both the ten minute jump from 925 to 935 within the shop during the kiss, and the ten minute jump after the end when Metatron walks in from then to 945. That doesn't make sense because cutting time out would make time jump forward, not be behind. I think I'm reading the watch wrong but I can't see any other time that makes sense. 945 might make sense? That would line up with the correct amount of time lost in the shop too, and that would mean they did not stop time during the kiss because it matches with the shop clock.

The time missing starts way too early for that to be due only to Crowley stopping time; someone else is messing with it, because nobody reacts to the missing time. The problem with Crowley or Az changing the clocks is that....Crowley wears a traditional watch this season, he knows how analogue clocks work, he would not make the hands be wrong if he was doing it. Ditto Az, it's his clock. And if it was merely stopped and started time, the clock wouldn't have its hands in the wrong place, would it? It starts off perfectly fine at 6am. Crowley checks his watch multiple times during this season, so either he doesn't notice the hour hand is wrong or he actually doesn't know how to read a watch. The other weird time thing is that Nina's shop doe s not have any hours posted, anywhere, and yet everyone seems to know when she opens. We are dealing with someone who isn't familiar with clocks trying to move people along to a certain "time" they should be at, or flat out deleting "time"/memories. Who isn't familiar with human time, but can make it "disappear"? Metatron.

What was going on during all that weird time, especially in s2e6? Were they perhaps talking about why Beez did what she did, and what love felt like, why Armageddon couldn't happen? Metatron would be invested in having no memories of that anywhere. We've already seen heaven hates friendships and supportive relationships. Perhaps Crowley did go back to Az after the kiss and try to explain things, and that's why he wasn't visibly too upset, why he drove off so slowly, because he thought Az was coming back and was just waiting for him so they could enact their joint plan. Maybe something else happened during the kiss, maybe they solved their different exactlys problem, and Metatron can't have that. Metatron's edits deleted any or all of that, so now Crowley remembers being rejected, stiffed, and Az thinks Crowley just walked out, and never came back like he usually does.

What do we know? Regular angels can't erase memories via their usual method if the angel is on earth; it's unknown if they can erase demons, presumably since they can only erase things that are in heaven, they can't touch demons unless they're also in heaven. (This implies that all current demons had their memories wiped before the Fall.) This means that angels can hide themselves if they are on earth, a la this whole season. We also know that selective memories can be wiped, in that one person can be affected in an event but not the others there--Furfur and Crowley in battle. Furfur has reality, Crowley does not.

We see Az flat out refusing the Metatron's offer. We see him going to talk to Crowley. We see him struggling to tell Metatron no after the fight. All this meddling and Az still almost doesn't play along.

This would also mean that the book of life isn't real, it's just miracles by Metatron, and he's apparently orders of power greater than even the mightiest of archangels. That's why the book wasn't invoked during the war in heaven, because it either doesn't exist or doesn't have that kind of power, it all relies on scare tactics with the real power being a single ultrapowerful angel, who while superpowerful, is still not as omnipotent as the rumored book.

But.

Nothing in heaven can change if you've got someone going round undoing your changes right behind you, you just end up running in circles. Like Jim and Crowley undoing each other's organizing. Especially when you don't even know it's happening.

[madlad-sadgal]

Hi! Here's some more stuff I noticed/wanted to point out in Nimona.

Nimona Spoilers!

Bal putting a protective arm in front of Nimona when Ambrosius asks who she is.

Everyone (the Director, Amb, and even the knights in the background) lean back when they realize that Nimona isn't human.

Nimona's frown that appears as soon as Ambrosius raises his sword, only to then turn into a sad, almost disappointed expression. She's disappointed because in a thousand years, nothing has changed, and history is just repeating itself at this point. Bal is framed for the murder of the queen and Nimona gets attacked, defends herself and then gets blamed for the damage. They then both look towards people they trust for help (Bal begging Amb to trust him and Nimona turning towards Gloreth once she's calmed down) only to have a sword pointed towards them ("Arrest them" and "Go back to the shadows from whence you came")

Facial expressions during the "Arrest them" scene. Bal looks betrayed and confused, like he doesn't believe Amb wouldn't ever trust him. Nimona looks hurt, but resigned, as if she expected this. Right before he says the words, Amb looks like he's about to cry, like he doesn't want to do it (which he probably doesn't) but has no choice (which he doesn't considering there's at least thirty other knights around them plus the Director). Meanwhile, the total opposite of everyone else's expressions, the Director looks pleased. You'd imagine she'd be hurt upon facing the arrest of the boy she's cared about and trained all these years, but she just looks pleased, almost proud, because her plan is working, as even someone such as Ambrosius, who knew Bal better than anyone, has turned on him.

The way Bal and Nimona just easily fall into battle, fighting alongside each other without missing a step, as if it's something they've been doing for years, or as if they're reading each other's minds.

Right before really starting to fight Ambrosius, a knight charges at Bal and he just, punches him without even looking back, which really goes to show how much he deserved his "top of the class" title, and that's just one example.

Bal being the one who attacks while Amb spends most of their fight defending. Also, Bal not taking back his comments about Nimona when she comes running by acting like a child, and instead adding onto those with "And she has my back. Unlike you." And just imagine how hurt Amb must be because, again, he probably doesn't want to arrest Bal, but just doesn't have a choice.

When Todd grabs Bal and drags him away and through the streets, I'm pretty sure he causes an accident, which just gives us another reason to hate him as a few civilians were most likely injured.

When the car is heading towards the kid, there's a knight standing there, but instead of saving the kid, he just runs away, and it's Nimona that ends up stopping the car, and yet even after doing that and shifting into what was probably intended as a non-threatening form, the kid still points a sword towards her and calls her a monster, proving to Nimona, once again, that in a thousand years, nothing has changed, and everyone, even kids, are just brainwashed people who are scared of what they don't know, and so react how they were taught to; hate.

Nimona saying she doesn't needs Bal's help because she's survived a thousand years without anyone's help and has learned to take care of herself.

"Kids. Little kids. They grow believing that they can be a hero if they drive a sword into the heart of anything different. And I'm the monster?" Two things to say about this. One, we have to remember that Nimona is talking to Ballister Boldheart, the commoner who wanted to be a knight and managed to be top of his class at the Institute. Killing monsters to become hero must've been what he believed at some point to want to become a knight, and that ideology was most likely forced into his brain while training at the Institute, and now he'd forced to reconsider that as someone wildly different opens his eyes to the real world. Secondly, it's that last phrase, "And I'm the monster?" because I want to put this in real life. This example is kind of obvious, but take the LGBT+ community. All we ask is basically to let us be who want to be, let us love who we want to love, and basically just accept us into society. Meanwhile, in the past LGBT+ people were killed in the past because they were different, people are yelled slurs at for being themselves in public, teens are kicked out of their homes by homophobic parents. And we're the monsters? The weirdos? The ones who are going to hell because we're "sinners"? Just wanted to put that in perspective.

Right after that, Nimona talks about how she sometimes just wants to let people kill her, basically saying she is, although not directly, considering suicide. For a thousand years, she's been piling all of this up, and although Bal betraying her at the end wasn't the main cause for her going to the statue, he was probably the one thing that was too much and made everything she's been balancing for all these years tumble down.

When Bal's talking about going over the wall, he's saying it not because he's tired of staying in a kingdom that hates him, but because he sees that the inside of the wall isn't safe for Nimona. He's ready to overcome his fears for her safety. On the other hand, Nimona doesn't acknowledge him until he outright says that they'll leave together. That's when she looks up at him and mutters "Together?" and when she says it, it just sound so hopeful, and it breaks my heart everytime.

When Bal says "We can't change the way people see us" Nimona seemingly takes a moment to think before saying that he changed the way he saw her, and when he confirms that, and I feel like I can just see a spark of hope in her at the thought that maybe, just maybe, if someone cans see her as someone worth caring for, protection and acceptance, perhaps other people could, which probably makes his betrayal towards the end hurt all the more.

This one is darker than my other ones and I elaborate a lot more on the things I point out, but I just really needed to talk about these specific scenes, so I still hope you enjoyed. I just love this movie and all the subtext that comes with it and what it means to different people who relate to so many different aspects of it, and yet still holds an important place in so many people's live, both as a comic and as a movie, but in different ways. But, yeah, hope you enjoyed and I just love this movie.

[flame-cat]

okay kim stans, now that I have your attention I'm dropping a fic idea that I'll never ever make. free to a good home. kisses kisses kisses <3

kind of smashing together a bunch of little ideas I've shown off and also kept in my brain privately for fun-having reasons. it's kind of just my dissertation on why kim is absolutely pathetic when you take down his walls. he's a tin soldier. nothing but thin walls and hollow insides. <- OUGH THATS GOOD USING THAT AT SOME POINT

so basically vague handwavey idea that I think its some time into like, the point a lot of the meta-fandom narrative has gotten to, some time down the line after a lot of the initial Mess post-martinaise smooths out into something that looks normalish, or at least isn't an immediate crisis. harry is on a sober streak, [the Hetero-Sexual Life Partners are at the very least not constantly trying to kill each other (kim has had a Talk with Jean, who is mostly just privately seething and malding now and feeling incredibly sorry for himself). ] <OR> [there was an Incident where Jean got really REALLY sorry for himself and made a whole fucking scene and basically tried to kill himself, heavily based on a fic i read (called Trigger Warning) it kinda woobifies jean a bit but other than that its soooo fucking good but tl;dr the jobwives have made up and ] kim and jean are kind of both Harry's partner in ways? jean is still a satellite officer but a lot of times he gets paired up with Harry and kim and they're kind of the nightmare blunt rotation right now.

soooo again handwaves somehow one of the old cases Kim's partner left behind that was left cold picks up a lead again out of the blue and Kim is. well. he's normally a workaholic but this is intense even for him. like Jesus. nobody at the 41st has seen him like this. he doesn't sleep for days on end. (maybe he picks up speed? from jean? he considers doing it in-game to improve his Performance so I don't think thats above him).

anyway rock meet hard place Harry finally gets the poor sod to take a god damn break and go home, he and jean can sort out his disaster area of a desk and cover for him. Kim obliges, goes home and- OH SHIT WHO IS THAT! uhhh its all very vague in my head here but tl;dr Kim gets jumped maybe? nd this was all some sort of like. Ploy? to uhh . idk I think maybe the moralintern is involved in ways. but uh eyes is alive and was an espionage and faked his death and is now like. idrk yet if He stabbed Kim or what, or why its all even. happening in the first place. and tbh its not important to me cause I'm never gonna write it, I don't plan to its just something to play with at night to fall asleep.

important bit is now Kim is Leaking Everywhere and well. doesn't exactly have time to call gotlieb. so. he stitches himself up (NOT THAT WELL) and trudges back to the precinct to report to pryce. understandably people are freaked out by the Blood and stuff. harry comes with Kim to the briefing. shit gets Revealed. Kim dissociate. harry is like uhhhh okay well his home isn't safe anymore. jean can he crash on your couch can you drive us there while I sit in the back with him. and jean is like. fuck. okay. and yeah Kim kinda comes back into it on the ride there, has a Teensy Weensy (HUGEBADMASSIVE) panic attack, eventually calms down enough to clamber out of the car and. jeans apartment is 4 floors up and there's no elevator. hell on earth. Kim refuses to be helped up but 2 floors up he trips and let's jean help him, then they get to the top and Kim is like. Jean. and jean is like what- ohgodyoureunconsciousnowokayharryopenthedoor. and uhhh the rest is pure self indulgent "the boys nurse him back to health mwah" but way messier obvs. like fully "ok I have to take out the stitches you did and restitch you, throw back this glass of whiskey and try not to vomit on me. oh well he passed out. at least he's not feeling it?" and yeah.

anyway there's a Conversation between jean and harry at one point because the through line here is that harry is trying to keep his Boys safe but he doesn't know how they can keep doing This *gestures to the cop thing* and so jean is like okay well are we gonna work the case without him orrrrr and harry is like I am NOT moving a MUSCLE until Kim is 100% okay. he stayed with me for 2 days after I got shot. and jean is like okay bye- and harry is like no listen. I don't. we are killing ourselves here. and jean is like yeah? point? and harry is like maybe we. shouldn't. and they have a whole argument about it but that wakes up Kim who eats shit trying to get up and they both like rush in to make sure he didn't fuck up the new stitches or bust his head open right, and Kim is like. okay conflict resolution time. refuses to back down until everything is explained in detail to him even if he's still loopy. anddddd tl;dr Kim agrees with harry and idk what happens next but there u go

[gothamstreetcat]

You can take Wesley and Lilah and spin them off as leads of their own show post... I dunno, mid-S4, let's say (maybe Wesley and Lilah leave L.A. after the Beast attacks W&H, you can decide exactly when they leave).

Are there any other buffyverse characters, major or minor or just one-episode characters that would be significant characters on this spin-off as well? What would the general premise be?

Okay, I've decided I'm going to answer this instead of finishing my little gifset (which has literally been talking over my mind all day). I don't know if this was the initial intention of "you can take Wesley and Lilah and spin them off as leads of their own show..." but I really think I read it wrong as took it as a compliment? <3 I really need to came down, lol I swear that is all I ever do. They're the leads of my blog FOR SURE.

(I'm going to put it under the cut because I know it's going to be long and embarrassing)

It's actually funny you should propose this because ever since I was little some bit of my brain decided they did run away together?? I wasn't even really over the beast but they did end up together in my little childhood brain and have been together ever since. Just doing whatever they want and being in love. But honestly, as I have gotten back on the Weslah train I have thought a lot more deeply about this.

I think leaving after the beasts attack is obviously ideal but I also think it is possible after everything has happened. Even though they are dead and serving W&H, who is to to say they can't just fuck-off and leave anyway leading their best undead lives???? I also think they would travel a lot and just be normal about things? Like have a normal life; breakfast in the morning, going to the movies, late night drives on Wesley's motorcycle. I even would want them to be married, nothing big or anything - just at a courthouse and I think Linsey would send Lilah an anonymous note congratulating her (I swear to god I am only sappy and dumb for them, okay?)

It sounds silly and so plain but I just want them to have it all and that would be enough for me. I also think Virginia would be part of it too because I have this little idea in my head that she and Wesley had been in touch and writing letters back and forth. I would want everyone in the buffyverse to be part of it in some way, just to see how far the pair of them have come. And at some point Faith shows up at their door and crashes with them for a few years.

I also have it in my mind that Cordelia bargained with the Powers and everyone got a do-over (because I am a sucker for the early seasons where everyone was alive and together and happy). And at one point the group is trying to figure out where Wesley is and what happened to him, and they go to his house and see him and Lilah cooking breakfast and they see how happy they are together so they just leave him be (but at some point, they all do come together again even if things still are not the same (because I literally have an entire inner workings of Wesley and his trauma and my trauma and even if everything is good it will just not be the same, you know?) But Wesley still helps out from time to time with cases and everyone does get together for major holidays or whatever.

I may or may not be making any sense right now and I know this is becoming very long.

I feel like I should be really embarrassed for what I'm about to say (as I also proceed to tell you with nothing but a NORMAL amount of joy in my heart), but there are also two other scenes I play in my mind constantly and I definitely put myself in them.

The first scene is a court hearing against Wesley/Lilah, W&H, and the Powers; where Wes and Lie have to fight for themselves to be free of their contracts and to be able to be together (on the count of that dumb and pesky good/evil thing). I am literally the star witness in this scenario literally just so I can talk about how in love they are and I would have a huge binder compiled of various blog posts and novel texts, show moments as proof. And I would show my gifs, and go on a huge tangent about Wesley and how he saved Lilah (love saved her) from the beast and how he tried to free her from her contract and it should have worked. And then I would tell Eve that she looks like the person who should be getting everyone's coffee and that she's just jealous because Wesley's given Lilah more orgasms in one night then she's had in her entire life. In my mind and in the scenario I think this is so fucking funny.

Also, when I was a kid I didn't really have friends so I got super fixated on my favorite characters from tv shows and they were my friends. Of course I was so fixated on Wesley and Lilah so they were my friends and we were close, so in this last scenario I imagine us being apart for my years (and somehow not because my ban be from watching the show) and somehow W&H tries to trap Lilah into coming back and I'm going to be used as some virginal sacrifice (which is so silly and weird but it is honestly one of the few things I am good for). But things get worked out and Lilah saves the day (as my hero) because she is a strong and independent woman who doesn't need a job that treats her badly - she is literally stronger and smarter then everyone at W&H. And at one point in this scenario she fights the people of W&H off with a sword because she is a badass baddie and I will forever be in love with that picture of her holding the axe (it's a real crime she didn't get to use it).

I also wanted to add, though, I'm sure you have read it already: the tough get going (out of town) by thinlizzy2 is literally a perfect Wesley/Lilah run away fanfic. I read it a lot and I say it so many time but I get so emotional about the bit with the horses and towards the end where Wesley tells Lilah he loves her ("as his heart fills with pride in her for so many reasons") It is literally one of my TOP Wesley/Lilah fanfics, maybe third. Almost cannon ending because my top fic is til break of day and in continuity of things, that's my cannon ending for them (in terms of fanfic, I wasn't not going to link one and not the other).