#also the keep reading fuction is not happy with asks right now so i can’t use it 😩

[moonb-eam]

24, 25, 45, 46 😁

kate my love!! thank youuuu 🧡

asks for fanfic authors

24. favourite scene you’ve ever written

ah sorry babe, i answered this one already!! 😓 i’m going to link to that ask if it’s okay!

you can find it here !

25. favourite line you’ve ever written

do you know what i had to go back through my fics to figure this out what a ride asdfjk

and i think i’ve decided on a little paragraph from interlude - the gallery, which isn’t one of my most popular pieces or anything, but when i wrote this bit i actually sat back and went, whew, okay (and that doesn’t happen very often lolol)

Lucas drains the rest of his wine, makes a face at the taste, and thinks about diving into Eliott’s giant painting. Maybe he can make a home for himself underneath the smudged lines, can wrap himself up in Eliott’s brushstrokes and fingerprints, and stay there. Unobtrusive. Unnoticed.

45. share the synopsis of a story you’re working on that you haven’t published yet

hmmmmmm okie 👀👀

i’ve talked about this story a bit already, so it might not be that exciting? but i’ll give a little synopsis for my dark academia au (i hope i can make it sound a little appealing asdfjk)

here we find lucas, a freshman attending the infamous, prestigious montvera university in france in the mid-1950s. he’s going on a scholarship, which, at this school, are few and far between. it’s something he was only able to get because of the connections his father has with the schooli.

it’s a strange school in a strange place, isolated from the rest of the world in the french countryside, the only town near it small and hushed, with locals who watch the students of montvera with careful eyes. they say there’s something odd about the students of that school, something that they can never put their fingers on, but it’s something that makes them shiver, makes the hair on their necks stand.

lucas doesn’t know this when he arrives at montvera, but there’s a lot he doesn’t know.

he doesn’t know about the things he’ll find there: hidden messages in the library, strange happenings in the woods, disappearances, ancient secrets, shadows that travel like ghosts.

he doesn’t know about he people he’ll meet there - an exclusive club of the institutions best and brightest, fascinatingly strange and intoxicatingly mysterious. he doesn't know about the boy that belongs in that fold - a quiet boy with green-grey eyes, a boy that’s been waiting for lucas for years without even knowing it.

(i’m also making a pinterest board for the story 🤠 you can find it here if you like!)

46. share a scene of a story that you haven’t published yet

alright, since i’m on a roll with the dark academia au i’m gonna just go ahead and post the entire prologue under the cut, which is essentially an intro to the school!

(the prologue is second-person pov but the fic will be third-person never fear)

It’s a place that’s familiar to you even if you’ve never been there.

Old brick buildings covered in ivy, cobble stones paths winding between them, students dashing between doors with textbooks held over their heads to avoid rain, a place so dripped in history and tradition that if you touch one of the walls your hand comes away sticky with it.

You’ve read about it, perhaps, the university north of Paris that is notoriously difficult to gain acceptance to. Perhaps you’re familiar with some of its graduates, notable names frequently seen in the news, from political leaders to famed scientists, academics to artists. 

Or you may have caught a whisper of one of the many rumours about it: the haunted buildings, the bribery schemes, the crushingly challenging curricula. You could take your pick of outlandish story, as places such as that, places with an inherent air of secrecy and prestige, are bound to be shrouded in infamy whether they want it or not.

(Although, perhaps it is better to be talked about, regardless of whether the words are good or bad. There is an immortality in infamy, don’t you think?)

You know of it, and perhaps you’ve seen it, that view from the passing roadway where you can just make out looming gothic spires through the mist, most of the view obstructed by a wrought iron gate and ancient, gnarled oaks. Perhaps your father stops the car, makes the entire family get out to try and get a better look, and you have to stand there while he waxes poetic about a school such as this.

What I wouldn’t give, your father says, for one of my children to go here.

But you take one look at the gate, at the giant “M” formed in the middle, and you know very well you will never belong in such a place. You know that this is a place for those who are brilliant, wealthy, well-connected. A place for people that are of a different caliber than yourself.

Eventually, your father allows you all to return to the car, and you carry on back into the city. You don’t think much more about L’Universitie de Montvera, only listen with half an ear when you hear your classmates bemoaning their rejections from the school. It becomes nothing more than a haze of fog in your memory, slipping out of loose fingers.

It’s a funny thing, how quickly memory can return with the right prompt.

Only a year later you’re on a train, travelling north to see your grands-parents and a boy takes the seat across from you. There’s nothing particularly remarkable about him to you, so you do nothing more than smile politely, taking note of his tweed jacket that’s been haphazardly sewn at a hole in the elbow, his brogues that are scuffed, his suitcases, dark blue with a faded Lallemant embossed at the closure. But then your gaze is caught on something, a piece of paper sticking out of the leather bag he sets on the ground, practically begging you to read it.

Bienvenue au L’Universitie de Montvera, it says, and immediately you’re back there, standing at those gates, wishing for once your father would be satisfied with his own children.

Oh, you think, eyeing up the boy with more interest now. You’re one of them.

You wonder, what sort of things wait for you there?

You do not ask. You just watch as the boy gets up at the second stop, takes his bags and stumbles out of the train, into the fog that always seems to plague this part of France.

You watch him leave, and you can’t decide if the breath you let out is because you wish you were him, or if you’re relieved that you’re not him.

[thefloatingstone]

A weeked at a hotel is quiet and alone.

A long walk or a going to a movie that starts after dark helps.

A four hour or longer bath where you sit in the water helps. Even if it doesnt helps it helps. And you smell good at the end of it which is nice even when you lack appreciation for nice things currently.

Do new things - feeling trapped or in a rut or the need to escape can be alleviated by feeling like youre making some sort of progress or have control over something in your life.

Sleeping more doesn’t help. Sleeping less doesnt help. Both are enough of a change/ strain on your body that they make you think they are but really they just increase problems and make the days pass quicker or slower.

Make goals. Meet goals. Cant get to goals make smaller goals to get there.

Focus on the things you can do and help and control and if you can’t do anything about it aknowledge it and let it go.

Hydrate. Youre not doing it enough, no one is.

Eat regularly, just like you should sleep regularly and for 9 hours - your body and therefore your mind functions better on a schedual.

It may not help but i can garrentee you not doing these things makes it harder than it needs to be.

Can also play games or read or watch shows until it passes, if it passes but thats just a… Temporary solution not an actual fix action.

But sometimes you don’t need a fix action you need a distraction to be immersed in and thats okay.

Get someone to talk to. Professionally.

Friends and family can help but we’re all not really great at healthy coping - and we know what works for us or what we’ve learned but we can’t always give you personalized tips that will help YOU get through your dips.

Clean/ reorganize your room - this just makes you feels self satisfied if youre lucky and if you arent well theres a little less mess and your mind feels less cluttered if you make even a little progress. Your environment can add to the strain.

Open a window idk why fresh air helps.

Candle with a scent you like - light it. Pet fire keeps you company.

Bake. Idk why but it helps, doesnt matter what youre making but if it makes a mess for you to clean up while you wait for it to be done its a win.

Plus baked goods are nice to have and eat or give away which makes you happy… Especially since half the time you dont feel the need to eat whatever youve baked.

Blast music. Loudly. Especially dark depressing shit or especially lively rebelling shit.

Or just play classical piano in the background because it helps…. Filter. Which is nice.

It gets better. Even if it turns out to be something youll struggle with it gets better because youll learn to manage it and it can’t take away the good even if it tells you it can.

Youve survived every horrible thing thats happened to you. Youll get through this too keep that in mind.

Also watch what youre telling yourself. Something as simple as telling yourself not “i can’t deal with this -emotional pain/situation - ” but “i dont want to deal with this” can in time make it easier to get past it because youre not bogged down in trying to… Reject how you feel.

Youre allowed to feel this way. Like. You may not want to but. You do so youve got to accept it on some level in order to beable to get past rejecting reality and figure out how best to approach it.

Emotions arent unreasonable. Like. Logically you’ll say they are but youre not depressed or whatever for no reason. Either theres something effecting you or your brain chemistry is off either way there is no “i shouldnt feel this way”

So like. Really dont talk down to yourself. Or if you do at least try to tack on something like “alright try again” or idk something positive or at least foward thinking.

And remeber you’re not alone.

Reach out. Message people. Sit on silent calls and share dead air with others. You may ache like a raw nerve or feel left out or ignored or a hundred other things but just. Attempting to be apart of your friends life or just hearing another person can do a world of difference. If not… In the moment than later it def gives you something to build on.

And youre not… A bother. Youre not… Responsible for making decisions about other peoples emotional wellbeing. Theyve got to tell you ‘hey i dont/ cant talk about this right now lets just bs about whatever instead". You need help or a distraction or anything ask the people you care about.

Youre not alone and isolating… Usually makes things worse.

Like alone time can help but isolatings a different ballgame entirely and youll know which youre doing.

Hell just posting on here and asking for tips is great and Im proud of you.

Sorry if that or any of this sounds condescending - im just. Summarizing shit ive learned and tried and had to talk myself into because i really thought my mental health was bullshit and i shouldnt need help with basic things.

But people do. Like. We’re not made to fuction the way we do and we’re not taught a lot of really simple things and how they effect us or the difference between coping healthly and not.

… Fuctioning can only get you so far so long, you’ve got to actually take care of yourself you know? I mean dont beat yourself up because taking care of yourself doesn’t line up with what you think that should mean is all.

Sorry to bug and do hope you get to feeling better soon.

This is an incredibly in-depth and helpful message. Thank you so very very much for taking the time to write it out for me. I’m posting this to prevent it from getting buried

Also, again, I want to thank everyone for sending me responses and messages about this. I’m sorry I’m not replying to all of them individually, but I am reading all of them <3 a lot of you are saying the same things like taking a walk or doing some light exercise, drinking water (I haven’t been doing that enough today) and things like that. As I said, I can’t do exercise tonight since it’s late, but I’ll try and take a walk tomorrow if the weather is good. And I’ll try and get some water in me.

I’m afraid talking to someone professional isn’t really possible right now, but hearing I can just go once makes me feel a little better. I’ve never realised I don’t have to try and afford an ongoing therapy thing. I can’t do it right now, but I’ll see if I can figure something out at some point in a few months if I can.

But thank you again for your help, guys. And although I feel bad for asking... but I’d really appreciate if you guys could continue to give it. Not because I want instant gratification or anything, but just because I don’t have much support elsewhere, and I want to get past this.

and thank you for being patient with me. I’m trying, I really am.