#also randomly feeling dysphoric again after literally months

[xxc4rt3rxx]

WHY AM I MENTALLY ILL AGAIN RAHHHHHHHHH

[edgyandoverzealous]

Characters from my hyperfixations past and present that remind me of my S/O

A fairly chaotic analysis(ish) if you will. Posting it because they said they wanted to read it and I am in fact, madly in love with them so, as they wish. Pt 1. Because they are constantly on my mind and I will inevitably see a character and go "it's them <33" in a loving tone again.

Rise!Donatello -rottmnt

This is obvious. Like to the point where I don't really have to explain it but I will.

First and foremost a mad scientist who appears to be both touch starved and touch adverse?

with good fashion?

and good music taste?

That's literally just my partner.

Donnie seems like the biggest chemistry man, I'm just saying.

Clever and witty?

An adorable sarcasm spouting chaotic good? Yes. Again it's literally just them.

Rise! Leonardo - rottmnt

Again obvious. Also with how hard they kin this turtle, obviously he reminds me of them.

Charming and use humor as a coping mechanism? Check.

And this may just be a headcannon on my part but I feel like Leonardo Hamato is really good at hiding he has a crush on someone/dropping hints. My partner was so good at hiding their crush on me there was a point in time I thought they didn't like me at all and liked someone else entirely. I also missed all the hints given to me. They also dropped a lot of hints and once even asked me out jokingly while we were mutually pining after each other by asking if the next hangout would be a date and I thought about replying with "it can be whatever you want it to be" but was scared of misreading the situation and changed the subject to a random item on the shelf. I'm incredibly emotionally dense.

A good leader too. They legitimately always seem like they know what to do which is great considering I never know what's going on.

Also they are so creative in their plans. We once had a date where we got blankets and squishmellos before cuddling. It was awesome!

Funny and witty too? I can't possibly ask for anything else.

Will Solace - Pjo

Ah yes. A doctor. What are doctors good at? Exactly, science. You know what this doctor in particular can also do? Sing and play guitar. You know who else does that? Yeah, my point exactly.

Good at identifying tells and keeping a straight face.

Also really good at de-escalating anxiety, which we all know Nico has to have at this point and Will knows how to help. The way this applies to my partner happens a lot when we're holding hands. For example, we had an assembly and we're holding hands. For reference I don't do well in those situations anxiety wise as a general rule of thumb. They started to squeeze my hand in sets of three which I mimicked it was quite grounding.

Also they're so accepting. They liked me before I came out as a Trans according to the two year timeframe they've given me and they still liked me after?? I also told them I was feeling dysphoric and they said something along the lines of "why? You're literally a man." That kept me going for a month. I still remember it randomly and end up smiling like a doofus for the next hour or so.

Entrapta - Shera PoP

Another mad scientist. I'm detecting a theme. She likes small things and I am small actually 5'2 at my age, in this economy awful therefore my partner likes small things. Flawless logic I know. *multiple tiny bows*

Otherwise similarly to Donnie, Entrapta is very smart. But Entrapta is also not so smart sometimes. Specifically, in social cues. For example a way this relates to my partner is knowing when a vague(ish) comment is about them. I once told them someone I liked told me I was attractive in makeup, it was them, literally the night before. They went "oh." Looking quite confused and a little concerned. I told them they were the said person in response.

Cute mannerisms. For example talking with their hands. Adorable.

Entrapta is really into space and science, you know who else is into space and science? The love of my life, correct.

Entrapta has pretty hair. Without even trying. YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAS PRETTY HAIR WITHOUT HAVING TO TRY? Exactly.

You know that cute face Entrapta has when she gets to talk about her inventions and sciences? Have you ever seen that on a real person? I have. Yes it is as adorable as you would think. Yes it is also a reason why I hype up all of their ideas and hyperfixations. No I won't stop actually.

Double Trouble- Shera Pop

Okay hear me out. Hear me out.

They're both hot actors.

They both can sing as well. The full package I literally am so lucky.

Also Double Trouble is tall and attractive. You know who else is tall and attractive? Yeah. Exactly.

Street smarts, they both got 'em. I don't know how to handle a strange man with a cardboard sign preaching to me while walking to a maverick, but they do and I think that's amazing.

Also that sarcasm/lying, like during game night when they were bluffing or covering for my very poor bluffing. I can't lie for shit. Something to see honestly. Their tone during is so endearing and attractive?? I don't think you understand. I can't comprehend how someone can sound so charming while dishing out lies and sarcasm. It legit had me swooning. If they were cast as a villain in anything I think I'd explode actually.