#also posting this from mobile i hope it doesnt look like ass lol

[ickyguts]

Go crazy go stupid

[trashcanfills]

Because someone needs to provide some gamer shimada bros content and Im here to deliver.

Apologies if formatting is weird cus Im usually on mobile.

Ok we all unanimously agree that Genji is def a weeb and a gamer, since he does frequent arcades in his youth and gotten high scores on them.

But what about HANZO?

Some ppl might go like eh he’s terrible cus he has absolutely no experience or lack experience in gaming since he’s the oldest son and hEIR of the Shimada Family and is too busy to even indulge in any sort of “fun”. WHICH. Is a good and valid headcanon considering the kind of person he is.

I previously made a post abt reading this unfinished fic on secret gamer hanzo and honestly before reading that fic I would prob agree with this grp of ppl. But now Im aware that secret gamer hanzo is a thing and holy shit Im digging it.

Like ok it’s completely ridiculous to even have hanzo to NOT have some fun while he was young right? (Unless your parents are completely cold and seeing u as a tool which I hope and pray that the bros parents are not but lets not get into that) So I can visualise the shimada bros bonding over games while they were young and enjoying their childhood. They would be competitive af and also play like a number of multiplayer games, with genji being a lil shit dallying around whenever they co-op and hanzo just going can we PLEASE complete the damn objectives cus thats so them lol.

Kinda makes me wonder abt the kind of gamers they are. Thanks to that fic, it gave me the idea of hanzo being a speedrunner and thats. So. Good??????? That idea???? Like cmon hes a perfectionist and I can see him playing a game repeatedly just to get used to it and start timing himself on how fast he can beat it. Completing games 100% i feel would be more of genjis thing, since he seems the kind to prefer exploring and wandering every nook and cranny looking for interesting shit. Hanzo wont really care much for exploration, just winning in the quickest time possible, tho thats just me opinion.

I can see this fitting in the storyline, where genji and hanzo discover gaming and both bond over that shit. Genji would love to play all kinds of games of genres. Not sure what he would lean towards though i would presume fast paced action kind of games for the thrill and excitement (since he does play arcade and does extremely well). Genji plays games to have fun and a good time, def acts like a lil shit in multiplayer games like trolling in chat or trashtalking. He likely has tried almost every game at least once, no matter how obscure or ridiculous it is. Pretty good at party games too, from his time socialising (both sfw and nsfw kinds). After spending time with zen i can see him also taking a liking to the more relaxing chill games like animal crossing.

Meanwhile hanzo is a picky ass motherfucker with most of the games he plays. He def does play the classics/mainstream games, but hes in it to feel a sense of accomplishment (and superiority). It has to be good quality games with clear objectives to fulfil thats for sure or like games that are useful in exercising his intellect. More into rpgs, puzzles, strategies. Prefers single player cus people are annoying at times (and hold him back oof). Competitive af. Likely not as a natural gamer like genji, but makes it up for his insane hard work and dedication to improve his skills. I like to think that he and genji saw some a vid of sb speedrunning a game they are both into a lot and he got hooked. Is part of the speedrunning community for sure and keeps up to date with all the latest speedrunning strats.

Oh boi and imagine dva the resident gamer finding out abt the shimada bros. She will get genji to play with her at times and its a blast. Hanzo not as much cus hes an emotionally constipated fuck who doesnt know how to socialise, but hoo boi when hana makes him play a game he was experienced in and he gets into it, shes def gon drag genji and hanzo into her daily gaming streams, but mostly hanzo cus he needs more social interaction. I dunno. I mean I can see hana and hanzo bonding tgt very well. And also cus I want to see hana’s wtf face when hanzo pulls all the insane speedrunning strats, and also hana encouraging hanzo to actually work on getting some world record speedruns. That would be cool.

Yea imma sum up those thoughts up for now but like essentially gamer hanzo? Fuck yea

[99adelheid99]

cool so since I’m procrastinating anyways on my school work im just going to write a character study on beast! dazai

because I re read it and im sad and asagiri just loves to make everyone suffer

so spoilers for the beast au

((BTW IM SO SORRY TUMBLR MOBILE ISN’T LETTING ME CUT THE POST TO A READ MORE SO IM GOING TO TRY TO DO IT ON MY PC AND HOPE IT WORKS IF IT DOESNT IM SO SORRY;;;; ))

asagiri has already decided to make dazai a tragic character and break our hearts once, but he decided to also rip them out and spit on it.

in the canon world, we see dazai struggle through depression. ever since he was young he found there was no value in living as he says to mori in the fifteen arc. he tries throughout his life desperately to understand just why humans strive to live, why they fight so hard for their lives and work hard to live life to the fullest.

it’s no different in the many other worlds The Book had created, and that lonely hole in his chest is probably much bigger.

as explained by dazai in the light novel, the power of The Book does not effect him because of his ability, since The Book itself is an ability, dazai naturally cancels it out. because of this, dazai can practically “read his own memories” from the canon world. so he knows everything that happens in the original universe, that goes for every single dazai in every single au. every single one.

this in itself is probably one of the saddest things. if people not understanding dazai didn���t hurt enough in the canon world, imagine how horrible it is that the beast! dazai had suffer with this knowledge alone, because as mentioned, it’s not wise for a lot of people to know about The Book since the world they reside in will become unstable, and have a chance of disappearing.

at the end of the light novel we also learn of dazai’s plan. why he captured gin, and why he wanted to bring akutagawa and atsushi together.

it was for odasaku.

because dazai has the memories from his “original” self, he remember odasaku. he remembers how he died, he remembers that they were best friends, he remembers how odasaku was the only person who understood dazai to his core, he remember how much odasaku means to him.

but odasaku of this world doesn’t remember it at all. because to him it never happened. there is only the beast world and the beast world alone.

this is where the angst hits (harder lol)

dazai figures out (at some time idk when) that this is the only universe that odasaku survives (im not sure how exactly, im assuming he can read the memories of the other dazais? Idk)

he remembers odasakus passionate of becoming a writer, he remembers odasakus determination not to kill just so he could write his own novel.

and because I really do believe dazai has a heart shrouded in all that darkness, dazai wants the best for odasaku, dazai wants to make it so odasaku can continue to survive and write his novel.

so dazai being dazai makes this extremely elaborate extra ass plan to make sure it happens.

dazai knows that this world has a chance of disappearing since every time something is written down in The Book in any other au (I think? I believe it can be any one of them not just the canon one) The Book doesn’t create it out of nothing exactly, but borrows from other worlds to create what is written in the book to reality.

dazai’s afraid that this world might cease to exist, and if it does odasaku won’t get to write his novel in this only universe he survives in, odasaku won’t he happy and dazai doesnt want that.

now extra ass osamu here uses a lot of cruel tactics to get to his end goal, and it isn’t right at all, but I still have to sympathize because its just so painful lmao

during akutagawa and atsushi’s final battle, dazai goes to the lupin bar where he meets odasaku for the first time in this world. I feel like dazai fought with himself a lot not to visit odasaku during this time, probably wanting to do nothing else but to run to his old friend that he missed so damn much. and I think he couldnt resist in the end, I think he desperately wanted to see him one last time because from the very beginning he knew his own fate.

one of the many (lol) things that hurts me during this meeting is how dazai immediately jumps happily into conversation with odasaku when he sees him, how he invites him quickly to sit down with him (in which odasaku does but doesn’t sit right next to him, which seemingly hurts dazai, ouch my heart) and how he picks up conversation that dazai would normally have with odasaku in the real world, asking him if anything interesting happened to him that day or telling him about new suicide methods he tried, which leaves odasaku heavily confused as he kind of awkwardly replies to each question.

now because the pov during this scene is in oda’s, we don’t get know exactly what dazai is thinking, but oda describes his posture and reactions well for us to take a guess of how hard it is for dazai to not have probably the most important person in his life not know or care about him.

dazai tightening his grip around his glass, or dazai looking like a happy child in one second to trying to compose his emotion with a small smile in the next, these reactions happen when odasaku keeps bringing up how he doesn’t know dazai and how confused he is. and dazai trying to hold onto something, someone, who made him so happy. trying to ignore the pain he feels and grasp on to the good memories he has but odasaku doesn’t.

and then there’s the part in the bar that asagiri decided to write because he’s a writer and like all authors, lowkey likes to see his audience suffer.

when dazai calls oda by his nickname odasaku once again trying to get him to understand him, the man replies:

“Don’t call me Odasaku. There is no reason of an enemy to call me that.”

yeah I cried

I cried a lot

dazai’s reaction didn’t help either.

The young man suddenly seemed to have trouble breathing…He fought against something invisible.

in this world, dazai probably mastered concealing his emotions (he does in like every world, but he’s much more grim in this one so) he put up this wall and put on a mask for everyone but odasaku, he let his wall down and odasaku didn’t acknowledge it, didn’t bring him some sort of comfort like he did in the canon universe. not intentionally of course, not because odasaku was cruel, but odasaku didn’t know dazai as anything else but his enemy. for all he knows, dazai could be trying to manipulate him.

theyre enemies. they could never be friends in this world. but dazai seems to still try, even a little.

in the end, they part ways. dazai putting on that mask once again, and acting like this whole meeting didn’t just destroy him. because it would be worth it in the end, odasaku would live, be happy, write his novel.

dazai would suffer, but that’s okay. odasaku hates dazai, but that’s okay.

because odasaku is alive. odasaku is happy. and to dazai that’s enough.

we get to the ending that no one wants to read because we’re already in pain and we know asagiri is waiting there with a shotgun to deliver the final blow.

dazai arrives after akutagawa and atsushi’s fight to reveal his reasoning behind his plan. how atsushi and aku have to work together protect The Book to make sure this world doesn’t disappear just for oda, and he mentions how no more then two people can know about the existence of The Book also for the protection and stability of their world.

atsushi decides to so some quick maths then, and realizes in horror that dazai has slowly made his way to the edge of the building.

he pleads with dazai to not do it, but theres obviously no stopping him.

and in that moment I believe for the first time in a long time dazai is truly content.

the hatred towards him is heavy, but it doesn’t matter to dazai because odasaku is safe. he completed his mission.

dazai planned all of this from the very beginning up to his death. now, arguably, despite dazai’s heartwarming end goal he was still an awful person. he was abusive and manipulate. he hurt and killed others to get what he wanted. he was not a good person

but he suffered so much for the sake of one person, he knew his ending wasn’t going to happy, but the end goal was enough. the end goal made it worth it.

osamu could never tell anyone about his pain, not even his best friend. he had to instead put on the mask of the cruel boss of the port mafia. people either had to hate him or fear him. no one could ever love him, no one could ever care for him. and osamu knew that. from the very beginning. asagiri truly wrote a tragic but beautiful character.

now if you’ll excuse me im going to go cry :)))

[violentviolette]

@starrystarberry tumblr fucked up and deleted ur ask cause i tried to switch over from mobile to my laptop to answer it so im just making a post lol

also it got a little long so i stuck it under a read more for u guys who arent into seeing fandom stuff on here

oh man okay I'll try to not write a novel for each of these lmfao

Lucio

Why I like them: hes a cocky bastard but also a giant idiot

Why I don’t: theres actually nothing I don't like about him akshsgsj like yea I know he imprisoned Asra's parents and made him an orphan at like 6 and everything but who hasnt made a mistake or two in their life?

Favorite season/movie: from what we have of his route so far I really like book 9: the hermit. it's got a lot of good hurt/comfort and that's my shit

Favorite episode (scene if movie): I'm a sucker for the steamy scenes so probably the makeout session in the winter woods

Favorite line: honestly all of them anything out of lucios mouth is gold

OTP: ME lmfao but no for real the mc in the game i dont think lucio is right for any of the characters even if i do ship him and julien for the angst

Favorite outfit: i actually really love his piratey outfit he wears in the flashbacks before he lost his arm.

Brotp: Julien 100%

Head Canon: i dont really have any for him

Unpopular opinion: Lucio is a switch and a service top the only True Top in this game is Nadia and i will die on that hill

A wish: none really, im happy with his route and where its been going and im excited to see the end of it!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I really hope his reverse ending is something other than him dying

5 words to best describe them: angry bratty baby boy

My nickname for them: baby boy

Light Yagami

Why I like them: cause he was one of the first really good protagonists whose actually the villian of the story and i love that shit

Why I don’t: Light drinks his own cool aid and is way to arrogant and i cant stand that. hes very much a holden caufield type character and i absoutely hate those

Favorite season/movie: i liked the anime but i only watched it once when it was airing and i never saw any of the movies so i dont know.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): same as above, this is making me think i should toss it in my que and do a rewatch. hmmm

Favorite line:ah man, i dont actually remember any but im sure its something gay

OTP: Light x a therapist

Favorite outfit: doesnt he only have one? that ugly ass tan suit or some variation of? lol

Brotp: light & ryuuk i loved their dynamic

Head Canon: none, i was never super invested enough in death note to have head canons

Unpopular opinion: none that i can think of, tho its probably somthing about misa lol

A wish: none

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: honestly the live action netflix adaptation already exists so like it cant get any worse

5 words to best describe them: someone id never wanna date

My nickname for them: bitch boy

Shaoran Li

Why I like them: omfg i LOVE shaoran cause hes just such a good boy? he tries so hard and he cares so much and he just wants to protect the world and its adorable

Why I don’t: theres genuinely nothing i dont like about Li

Favorite season/movie: while im loving blushy sweet shy Li in the new clear clard arc, i have a soft spot for angry sassy Li who was competing against sakura in season 1

Favorite episode (scene if movie): the episode with the tree and the time card

Favorite line: i dont think i have one

OTP: i mean is this even a question? sakura all the way

Favorite outfit: i lovelovelove his green fighting robes

Brotp: him and tomoyo being #Teamsakura all day every day together is the best thing

Head Canon: none really

Unpopular opinion: what even is an unpopular cardcaptor sakura opinion??

A wish: clear card anime s2 where are u????

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: i dunno, this series never betrays me so i dont have many fears

5 words to best describe them: strong brave and loyal boy

My nickname for them: i like to call him Li tho thats not rly a nickname

Haruka Tennoh

Why I like them: oh man. i was in. fucking. love. with Haruka as a young tiny queer. i love everything about her

Why I don’t: there is nothing not to love

Favorite season/movie: their original appearance arc is my fav so S

Favorite episode (scene if movie): the one in crystal where she kisses Usagi

Favorite line: i mean the obvious one is “does it really matter if im a man or a woman” because enby rights but also i fucking love every bit of sass ridden dialog between her and Seiya

OTP: Uranus and Neptune are soulmates and thats that on that

Favorite outfit: oh man she had so many Iconic Looks but im gonna have to give it to her racing gear.

Brotp: I love her and Mars as brotp’s dont ask me to explain it lol

Head Canon: nothing like substatial or series just stupid/crack personality ones

Unpopular opinion: none i dont think? again i dont even know if ive ever really heard an “unpopular opinion” for her

A wish: more crystal before im 90 pls

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: i mean once again the dub and the cousins sitation already exists so ive lived my nightmare. because framing them as incestuous cousins is somehow better than letting them be gay

5 words to best describe them: a gay enby queen

My nickname for them: my wife

[reineyday]

ye this is a hot take lol. (sorry op if im kinda hijacking what might have just been a vent post as opposed to an actual discussion/debate prompt. 😅) im not personally one to really enjoy modern art, and i used to think about it like op (it's just a giant blue canvas! i can paint this at home!) but after my own art school experience, i think there's something to be said about how modern art changed the way people think about ("fine") art and what constitutes as art in the first place.

i hope you dont mind me offering this other (lukewarm?) take on your hot art take, op! this isnt a modern art defense post in the sense that i think it's amazing, but it does fall under my own definition art and here's why.

(this is a wholeass essay btw. idk if it's 1000-1200 words cuz im on mobile but that's what it feels like. 😅 it's got a thesis and point-proof analysis and everything.)

for example, your "ten foot canvas of Blue 01"--sounds like color field painting. artists like rothko did stuff like this, and yes, it is technically just canvases of pretty colours up on a wall. but the thing about color field painting is that youre not just supposed to think about the canvas and the canvas alone. actually, if youre an artist staging work in an actual physical place, you should never just think about your piece in isolation (the electrical outlet an inch away from your hanging painting does make a difference to your work lol).

color field painters drew attention to the physical space by making their canvases wall-sized, by noting and changing the colour of the wallpaper, by positioning the viewer's bench a specific amount away from the canvas so that the viewer can be overwhelmed by the colour(s) the way the artist intends. (honestly i feel like colour field painting as a style really lends some validity both to the practice of interior design and to colour theory in general.) the art isnt just the blue canvas itself, it's the experience of the viewer.

and i think that's the thesis of a lot of modern ("fine") art, once we start to step away from the traditional paint-on-canvas and start getting into things like performance art and art installations: it's not just about the content, it's about the experience, whether that be of the viewer or the artists themselves.

one of my favourite installation pieces is called the running fence (christo & jean-claude, 1972-76) and it's this long-ass fence 5.5 meters (18 feet) high, 39.4 kilometers (24.5 miles) of billowing white nylon running through some farmland in cali. it's pretty to look at, but one of my favourite things about it is that they start the piece's creation period at 1972 bc that's when they got the idea and started working on it. it's just that working on it included getting permission from all the counties they wanted to run the fence through, and that meant justifying to the county--to their law and policy makers--that this was a valuable project bc it was art. and that meant they had to (re)define what art was and then argue their case. the art isnt just the piece, it's the political processes they went through to get permission to make it.

a very contentious musical piece is 4'33" (john cage, 1952), a "song" that is four minutes and thirty three seconds of silence. when it's performed, a professional pianist literally goes up to a piano and does all the preppy stuff involved in playing and performing, and then he just. doesnt play. (or does it count as playing just because the song is all rests?) for 4 mins and 33 seconds, it's just the audience. from what i understand, it's silent so that listeners/viewers become more aware of the environment and the people in the room with them, but also like. it's just silence. is it even a song? but it has sheet music so it must count, right?

the piece might be anger-inducing (it's literally just silence! you're not listening to anything!) but it also makes you ask some interesting questions about what music is, about the experience of listening together with other people, of being a group in a room watching some guy do a thing, about the sounds you and the people around you make subconsciously, especially when you're bored or impatient. and therein lies the art of it all with this piece--you become aware of the experience. also it makes you a little philosophical about music and community.

and that's the other thing about ("fine") art, is that i think you can call it art if it makes you philosophical, makes you think about the world and how you experience it. surrealism as a movement does this with its depicted content (all those paintings of wavy dreaming things making you question reality as we experience it), but i mean, black square (malevich, 1915) does it too. just by existing, it posits the question: is this art? i honestly, personally, think the piece and the movement it's a part of (suprematism, which argues that art should be about representing pure artistic feeling as opposed to depicting objects) is wholly and completely full of shit. they were really like "abstract art should be the most base form of artistic feelings" and then said "you can only use geometric shapes and this range of colours" like... that's not even slightly expressive. that's so constricting. how could that be artistic feeling in its purest form? that's not what *i* think is art--but that's why black square works, and why we still study it when we cover art history movements: it makes you ask the questions.

it makes you form your own opinions and articulate why you think malevich was wrong (or right, i guess, but im not in that camp). it is literally just a black square. there is actually evidence he painted over a more colourful piece just to display this goddamn black square, and he displayed it where people usually display a crucifix in a room, which is like a whole added layer of implications l o l. maybe i wouldnt call it art, and it definitely makes me angry, but the fact remains that because of this piece, i have a firmer definition of what art is to me, and i understand that my feelings of anger towards that is part of the whole package. looking at black square is on the whole supposed to be a very meta experience, and that's the art. the content itself doesnt take any skill at all, and it evokes the feelings of anger (and confusion and skepticism), but none of that is the point anyways.

these modern artists weren't trying to be different and quirky and anger-inducing per se, they were questioning the status quo of art and what counts as art. some of it ends up being vapid and stupid (jeff koons comes to mind, no offense to anyone who likes his work but i definitely dont) and some it is anger-inducing but to all the right people (duchamp's fountain, 1917, made so many people angry bc a) it was a readymade urinal lol, and b) it was shaped like the silhouette of the virgin mary). even though i might hate it (not duchamp's urinal, i love duchamp's urinal), i cant help but big sigh and admit it's still art. i may hate everything koons puts out (seriously, you're gonna display some vacuums in a cabinet and call it art?) but at the end of the day, yeah, it is art. he's displaying those vacuums. theyre there. and now a bunch of people will find other artists who use readymade objects and products to say something (hopefully more scathing and critical) about capitalism just as valid as whatever jeff koons is doing.

(btw everything in koons's artist statement in that moma link on the vacuums makes me angry bc it feels not only stupid and reachy but also sexist! 🙃 yet... it still counts as art. *big sigh*)

ive been periodically referring to it as ("fine") art and that's because i personally think there's a difference between fine art and art in general. ive been typing ("fine") bc i wanted to talk about art in general (art that is for and by the public, is accessible and surrounds us) but in a way that indicates it's being largely influenced by fine art. ive put "fine" in quotations bc what constitutes as fine art is usually (unfortunately) dependent galleries and art collectors as much as it is subjective.

in this post, ive mostly been referring to modern fine art, but in a way that trickles down to art in general. fine art is unfortunately expensive and exclusive, even if these days galleries are cheap/free to visit. fine art, in this post, means the stuff in galleries, the stuff people laud, the stuff that costs hundreds and hundreds of dollars. art in general, though? art is something that should be a part of every day life, something expressive and accessible. i'm not gonna argue that galleries are predatory, but it's an unfortunate fact that for most people, the things we see in galleries are the things people consider the standard definition of art--the same way we tend to think of the things we see on tv and blockbuster movies as the media standard.

this is why modern art--the art that makes you angry because it challenges your definition of what art is--ends up being important and still counts as art (to me). if modern galleries accept and display all these new ways of thinking about art, it trickles down to the masses, and affects the definition of art in general. if modern galleries start drawing more attention to poc/indigenous artists and (re)framing exhibitions to be not only respectful but impactful, if they highlight local artists, then regular people who go in on dates and family days will leave thinking about these things, because they see it represented in front of them. art should be more than the eurocentric stuff they teach us and show us, and it should encompass more than painting on canvases, but people dont realize that until they visit a gallery that shows them that on a personal level.

so many established forms of art had to fight to be defined as art. photography wasnt initially considered an art, and videography is arguably still fighting to be counted as art. impressionism, the movement to which monet belongs, might be what people imagine when they think of traditional art, but the movement had to fight to be counted as art as well since high society at the time didnt think that impressism as a style was worth shit and ousted them from their galleries. i think modern art falls under this umbrella of having to fight to be defined as art, but i think it works out well enough as long as people start talking about it (like we are!).

anyways, i hope this (long, loooong) post doesnt come off as bashing people bc they "just dont get it". i dont mean to be obnoxious and/or condescending about it, or come off as trying to be intellectually superior or anything (and if i did then yikes, i am so sorry), i just truly and genuinely enjoy engaging with art on all levels, including the meta level outside of the content itself. modern art seems to sit on this really fascinating line that always gets people incensed and talking--and i think that's a good thing, and why i personally count it in my own definition of art, even though i might hate the content itself. i hope instead of bashing on people who hate modern art, this post is offering an alternative way of thinking about (modern) art and why it should count as art, even if you do hate it. its purpose isnt necessarily to induce anger, and i'd personally be hard-pressed to call most modern art awe-inspiring or even likable, but i find that modern art the likes of which we're discussing is usually less about emotions evoked and more about art as a practice and/or as an instituiton anyways.

god knows i look at most of pollock's work and think "why 🙄", but then i remind myself that him becoming popular probably also changed the way the general public thought about the process of painting (goodbye, paintbrushes!) and that probably influenced other artists later on to do way more interesting things than drip paint, even if they were less popular and/or enduring in popular culture. pollock's popularity also got us all discussing why dripped paint should count as art, which is a win, even if most people who look at his work end up thinking "no, it shouldnt count as art because my five year old can do that". (to which i usually reply: "but your five year old didnt, did they?" that conversation, however, is a whole different one that isnt about art in general, but about fine art and exclusivity and capitalism and a whole lotta horse shit so we're not gonna touch on it lol.)

at the end of the day tho, and like yall said, art is totally subjective and based on personal opinion. this is just my side of it! i dont generally like the modern art that does stuff like that, but this long post kinda goes over why id still call it art (even if im doing it through clenched teeth haha).

ahh tl;dr - yes art is about skill and talent and time and dedication. art is about being awed and "damn i wish i could do that." but art (to me) is also about pushing you to think about the definition of art and what it means. art is also about the social experience of looking at a thing (alone or together), and the things the artist has to do to create even before they pick up the materials to start making. if it makes you think, then it should count as art, just as much as anything that makes you feel, or is simply nice to look at. but like i said, that's just me. art is supposed to be flexible in definition, and i wouldnt have it any other way.

Hot Art Take

I don't care what the meanings behind modern abstract paintings are, I'll still never like them. 3 years of art school didn't change my mind, and neither will people telling me that 'oh its to make people angry!' never will either.

The literal ONLY exception to this is brush stroke skills & Color skills. Otherwise I will not look at a ten foot canvas of Blue 01 and call it art.

Everyone is allowed their own opinions though so that's as far as my hot take goes. I also just don't like galleries bc their predatory and always have been. Mostly just money laundering systems as a way to make money off the backs of artists they pick and choose to gain popularity and in the olden days were used to make money off the backs of impoverished artists who got next to nothing in return for sales.

[canonicallyanxious]

For the fic ask meme, 3, 15, and 23, please! :-)

Thanks friend!!! I’m on mobile currently and who knows when I’ll next be able ti get in a computer so I apologize in advance for the terrible formatting but what can you do lol

3. Favorite line/scene you wrote this year?

I always find this question insanely unfair because like how am I supposed to remember everything I wrote this year, there’s almost 200k words of it??? having said that, I do have a list of favorite scenes I wrote (for skam fandom because like what else did I write this year lol)

-the last scene in the long distance fic a dream to be close to you where Even feels bigger than the whole universe -in making new cliches: the last scene of chapter three where they race home and Isak tells even that his punishment is that the loser has to stay; the museum scene in chapter 4; the r+j scene in chapter 7 was immensely fun; pretty much all of chapters 8, 9, and 12; the scene with ISak’s mom in the epilogue, as well as where Even meets Mikael-a scene I didn’t actually end up publishing for a fic that will never exist, in a universe where Isak and Even meet over the Internet; I sort of mashed out their first meeting over Skype and I actually really enjoyed writing it lol

And as far as fave lines go I am going to share this one from a chapter of the marching band au that didn’t end up getting posted, mostly because there is a chance it never will be posted and honestly what a damn shame this brilliant exchange might never be shared with the world:

“Oh my god,” Eva says gleefully. “You’re gay for Even.”His brain kind of short circuits, a little.“I’m not /gay for Even/,” Isak snaps. “I’m gay, /period/.”“Uh huh. I bet you think his ass looks great in uniform.”“Oh my god,” Isak says, scandalized.“Do you wanna suck his reed?” Eva says, the widest shit eating grin on her face he’s ever seen in his damn life. “Do you wanna blow on his horn?”“Oh my /god/.”“Do you want him to lick your brass?”

15. Things I’ve learned this year

The true meaning of writing for yourselfTaking a break from fic is okay, and fuck the assholes who give you shit for itYou’re not a failure if you’re not putting out as much content as other people. Doesnt make your work any lesser. No matter what it seems like, taking your time is 100% okay.

23. Fics you wanted to write and didn’t

FUCK THERE ARE SO MANY!!! WHERE DO I EVEN START!!!!!!

Okay well there was an in the flesh evak au collab that never got past the first couple chapters. There’s another au which was supposed to be a collab but isn’t going to be anymore that I alluded to earlier, in which Isak is an amateur movie critic/blogger and Even makes indie short films to put on YouTube for free as a hobby, and they meet after Isak stumbles on Even’s vids and decides to write a hugely positive review for it and Even of course happens to follow ISak’s blog religiously and flips a shit or ten when he posts the reviews. They proceed to strike up an intense, fast moving internet long distance friendship that gradually turns into romance. Can you tell I’m still stuck on this idea lol it was going to be SO MUCH FUN

For mnc verse, I had at least two spinoffs planned, a noora/eva/vilde one shot and an Even POV of part 2, but that universe ended up exhausting me too much for me to continue with either of those plans haha.

In terms of one shots, there’s a fic I wanted to write where jonas and Magnus and Mahdi all sort of figure out that they’re queer together. I also toyed with the idea of trying nsfw for evak, but in terms of like, writing a crackish scene where htey try sexy things and it goes horrifically awry lol. The marching band au counts I guess because it was going to be much more extensive than it already was. I didn’t end up finishing the au in which they’re kindergarten teachers but I’m still holding out hope on that one for 2018 (if it weren’t for my DAMN KEYBOARD BREAKING……..) there’s probably waaaay more au’s I came up with but that’s all I can think of, mostly notable because for most of these ideas I actually ended up writing a good portion of it before life got in the way or whatnot. Idk if anyone would be interested but if you are I’d be happy to post some of the outlines for them, as especially for the ones that were supposed to be collabs it’s extremely unlikely they’ll ever come to fruition.

Ask me some q’s about fic I wrote this year! On mobile so can’t link but if you go through my blog a bit you should find them.

[icyhobi]

YOU ARE AN AMAZING PERSON AND YOU HAVE AMAZING PEOPLE AROUND YOU!! HAVE A GOOD DAY AHEAD AND I HOPE YOU EAT A LOT THAT IS ALL 💓

Thank you so much! And btw everyone, i’ll be answering all the asks i have in my inbox rn, since i don’t wanna let it pile up even more. So beware, this is a long ass post! (and idk if it will show up on mobile properly :(

fullydecaffeinateddinosaur said:AHHHHHH I love Forgotten, I hope you’ll make a part two (but if you don’t that’s okay). DONT LET THE HATERS BRING YOU DOWN!!! You’re an amazing writer.

thank you so much for liking it!

Anonymous said:Don’t stop writing! I think that a non was just jealous and if that persone doesn’t like smut well she don’t have to read them! Don’t let anyone to drag you down because I love your stories! 😘

lool dw, i definately won’t stop writing!

Anonymous said:PLEASE MAKE A PART TWO TO FORGOTTEN 😭😭😭😭

umm, i’m still deciding if i should or not… i just, idk...

Anonymous said:DAMN. FORGOTTEN GOT ME FUCKED UP. YOU ARE DEFINITELY MY FAVORITE WRITER WOW I LOVE YOU♥️

OMG AM I REALLY!??! WOOOW!!! THANK YOU!

Anonymous said:Is forgotten supossed to have a second part? :) Sorry if my english is bad

no, don’t be sorry your english is perfectly fine! and im still thinking about it!

Anonymous said:Omg forgotten was soooooooo good!!! Please do another part!!

thanks! and maybe ;)

Anonymous said:Forgotten made me shed actual tears 😭 are you going to be continuing it?

did it really? was it too harsh? and im still not too sure if i will

Anonymous said:will their be a forgotten pt 2?

who knows…

Anonymous said:Guuuuurrrrl i read your fic (forgotten) and i looooved it soooo much that i wanted to re-read it (its that a word? Sorry spanish speaker here hahah) but i couldn’t remember your nameee and i spend the entire day looking for you (cause i only rememberd the “mochi” part) and i finally fouuuuuuund youuu!!!!!! So pleeeeease keep it up with the good work! Please make chapter 2! Loveeeee yaa! Saludos desde el fin del mundo!

yaaay you found me!!!

Anonymous said:I LOVE FORGOTTEN AHHHHHHHHHHH ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

THANK YOU!!!!!!

Anonymous said:I need part 2 of forgotten now because like I’m crying and omg the feels

Anonymous said:I was wondering if you’re ever going to continue forgotten! The ending was such a twist and I cried while reading it LMAO i think it would make a good full fanfic!! Pls at least make a part 2 I’m dying RN

Anonymous said:will there be a pt2 of forgotten? 

Anonymous said:Wow forgotten got me fucked up!! I loved it I loved it I loved it!!!!! Do you think there’ll be a part two for this or is it the only one?

Anonymous said:MOCHIIII I love you and your an amazing writer but Forgotten gave me da feels man!!!!!! I finally found someone I hate (Tae’s cheater of a wifu) XD. Is there anyway you might continue the story though with a happy (revenge on the witch as well 😈) ending????? 

Anonymous said:Holy moly forgotten is so good!!! I hope you do a part two❤️❤️❤️

Anonymous said:BUT UR GOING TO MAKE A PART 2 TO FORGOTTEN RIGHT?!!!!!

Anonymous said:Part 2 of forgotten plz omg I loved it it was so good💙💙

Anonymous said:omggggg your Taehyung uni story defos needs a part 2!! i loved it!!

figureinglifeout said:Omg pls tell me forgotten has a sequel. Tae can’t do OC dirty like that

fairyrink said:I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED AND WHY TAE IS ENGAGED TO THAT GIRL BUT UM I NEED EXPLANATIONS SO I NEED TO KNOW IF YOURE DOING A PART 2 OF FORGOTTEN PLEASE!!! 😭😭❤️❤️

Anonymous said:Will there be part 2 of Forgotten? I really hope there will be more it can’t end like that! That bish can’t win!

Anonymous said:OMG!! I really liked Forgotten a lot even if it did break my heart at the end :’( Are you thinking of making a part two or something like that cause that was really good and I just want Taehyung x reader to be together even though that’s unlikely 💔😅

Anonymous said:Is Forgotten going to be a series?

Anonymous said:Ah also forgot to ask: is Forgotten a one shot? - moose anon

Anonymous said:I’m sorry but Forgotten has me yelling WTF. Like, I knew something like that would happen, BUT I STILL WASNT READY. UGH MY HEART. FUDGE MUFFINS. - moose anon

xsnapplex said:Mochi!! I really hope you make Forgotten a series, because classic you out a cliff hanger in it… T-T I almost lost my mind at the end. But it was sooooo goood

ahh okay, so i decided to answer these asks all together since they are basically asking the same thing. first of all, THANK  YOU SO MUCH FOR LIKING IT!!! xoxo im like so happy you guys enjoyed it! and to answer your questions, im still not to sure if there will be a second part unfortunately… we’ll just have to see!

Anonymous said:Lol I think you made me a sucker for hybrid ffs 😂 but i love “take it like a puppy” so much. ❤️😊😘😍

aww thank you! lmao i really like hybrid aus too!

Anonymous said:😭😭😭😭 I wasn’t ready for it. I’m a crying mess now after forgotten it was soooo good. If it’s a oneshot it’s beautiful and really sad but if there’s gonna be another part… *fingers crossed*

thank you sooo much!! and nooo dont cry!!

sanha-ii said:Okay right, the story Forgotten got me tense as! The cliffhanger at the end is actually making me shriek due to the amount of theories I’m getting, will there be a part 2 by any chance or is this a story where you let the readers suffer forever😂😂

ikr? it was such a twist lol. and idk, maybe i’ll just be mean and let you guys suffer…. *insert even laugh*

Anonymous said:WTF TAEHYUNG AND SEULGI ENDED UP TOGETHER?????? AND TAEHYUNG DOESNT REMEMBER THE READER??????

IKR RIGHT!?!??! LIKE WHAAAATTTT????

zara-zaza said:Forgotten was so good!!! But if it was me I would have slaped the shit out of Seulgi the second time I saw her 😂😂 but just a question does Tae really don’t remember her or was he just mad at her?

loool it was so shocking thoo. and well…. i cant say… ;)

Anonymous said:Ahhhh I’m so freaking hooked on “Forgotten”!!! Ugh I kinda wish that the reader moved on from Taehyung but it soooo good either way! I love the way you write and I can’t wait to see what happens next ♡♡♡♡♡

ikr poor reader! :( And thank you for liking it!

Anonymous said:Oh my god! A second part in forgotten, please! Y/N deserves to be happy and Seulgi SHOULD DIE! I’m sorry, I’m just being really over dramatic 

But is Seulgi really the bad guy here? I mean maybe was hurt because Y/n left… but Seulgi clearly leave him tho… ;)

Anonymous said:PLEASE DO A TEASE PT 3 I WILL SELL MY SOUL FOR IT HAVSHBAHAHSH U WRITE SO GOOD IM STUCK IN THE REALM OF UR GOOD FICS

lool thank you! and im sorry bby, but tease was only meant to be a two-shot :(

Anonymous said:uM, eXCusE U?! How dare you write something as good as forgotten and LEAVE US ON A CLIFFHANGER LIKE THAT?! iT’S LIKE pURusaSION BTS style!!!!!

loool my style is usually ending things off on cliffhangers!!! 

Anonymous said:Please do another part of tease I can’t take the ending please my love

srry bby, but i won’t :/

Anonymous said:i just finished reading the taehyung x reader, forgotten and im crying at how you ended it. you’re a great writer, bless you.

loool it was so mean right??? BUT THANK YOU!!! xoxo :”)

Anonymous said:omg Forgotten was sooo good and sad it legit brought me to tears 😭❤️ and the plot twist at the end got me so fucked up I was expecting a happy ending :’D

aww sorry bby!! i didn’t mean to make you cry

Anonymous said:WTF WRITER NIM YOU MADE ME CRY IM CRYING WHY DID YOU HURT ME WITH THAT ENDING HOW COULD YOU?! IM JUST GONNA GO CRY NOW AND I HOPE SEULGI DIES AND ROTS!¡ I’m in pain, you better fix this 😭 - Psychotic Jungkook stan anon

ohhhh are you threatening me???? LOOOOL im so cruel, right???

Anonymous said:OMG how… how could you end Forgotten just like that pls have mercy on yn …. i can’t believe you …. oh god

hmmm we’ll see… ;)

Anonymous said:Fanfic request: Could you write a fanfic about Min Yoongi (x Reader) where he was a mass murderer or gang leader/criminal that fell in love with you on a job of his. (Something like that at least. I don’t really know. But I thought that we should start recommending stuff that wasn’t just the mankae line lol)

thank you for requesting! but unfortunately i not taking in requests since i have too much stories to work on atm! srry again!

Anonymous said:Forgotten.. I’m literally about to die now.😫😭 WHYYYYYYYYYY!?! UGHHHHHH. Getting my heart attacked and stomped on was not how I wanted to end my night.😭😫😂 Anyways, it’s beautifully written! I love your fanfics (even if they do bring my heart an enormous amount of pain)!💕😘

aww im so sorry! i didnt mean to hurt your guys! i just wanted to write something very angsty!! but thank you so much for reading it!

Anonymous said:There is a part of me that wants to kiss you but another part of me that wants to ask you ‘why?’ Also why does everyone use Selugi as 'that girl’ in fanfics? I like I am getting into R.V and I am starting to like her. ~Edgy ❤❤ (Kiss part spoke louder that was amazing also I am a sucker for angst it fuels my soul. Love u)

loool aww edgy, your soo funny!

Anyways, this took a long time to answer, but thank you eveyone who sent me an ask! i seriously love you guys!!!

[sanchoyo]

EXACTY!!! EXACTLY

I think the problem is how the websites are set up!!! old deviantart and old websites in general (like, forums) were awesome bc the small communities and actually FEEDBACK was encouraged!!! Websites don't really do that anymore idk how to describe it...and there's no real good websites for art sharing like that!

I mean.

instagram is mobile only, which tends to kill quality, doesn't let you have long descriptions, or put links in them!!! It's the most popular way rn for artists to get a following, and the hashtag system is good! But it doesn't really allow for a community to exist; it just wasn't made for art, it was made for photo and video sharing. Also again: MOBILE ONLY??

Twitter...is twitter... the hashtag system isn't great and it's just. kinda toxic. I only log in there to post art then dip. The only way to get a following is to jump aggressively on every art trend that lasts a week and HOPE a post blows up. and people are doing NFT shit and tend to self-promote on popular posts and. Ugh

tumblrs tagging system doesnt work half the time bc of a lot of rules they dont TELL YOU, and SO many people left after the nsfw ban (which DIDNT WORK I STILL HAVE PORNBOTS FOLLOWING ME!! WEEKLY!!!! SCREAM) and tbh that was a DUMB choice on their part. sex workers used this app and it was relatively safe for stuff like that and since we're talking abt art-platforms, nsfw artists did too!! I'm ace and rly dont even look at that stuff but I understand the importance of having a space for it. (and a lot of them were super good at tagging it, so u could just blacklist stuff anyway) now the issue is that ppl on here dont wanna rb so its harder for art to reach people!!! esp if youre just starting out and don't have a following. A lot of ppl dont check in the tags for art for fandoms! (or the tumblr tags just straight up dont SHOW the post in the tags...again. poor tagging system)

I KNOOOW people think of dA as a place where it was like. full of weird kink art. (I am NOT arguing abt that. it 100% was/is lol) but tbh thats ...p much everywhere on the internet... if you'd even mention a fandom/chara in the description, it'd show up in the search!! The search feature was great! The old way of sorting galleries use to be great bc if you were looking for certain stories or ocs from a person, you could easily find it! collabing/art trading with people felt so much more casual, and it had a forum feel where you could send comments back and forth.. where if ppl were fans of a thing, you'd see their comments with yours and be able to reply like 'YES OMG I LOVE THIS PERSONS ART/OCS TOO!! AAA' like. specifically thinking of Miss Chelsi-Apple-Leafs comic!!! God it was fun when she'd release stuff and a ton of tmm fans would speculate and gush in her comments lol. And adopts!! how fun were adopts!! and decking out your page with stamps/making them for ur friends to let them know you're their fan...

frankly just no other website compares imo when it comes to art sharing and no other website feels like it's really MADE for that in the way dA was. it USED to be so good before they dug their own graves with poor design and lack of navigation/organization. (Poor Website Design. When its an ART SITE?? HIRE BETTER DESIGNERS MY GOD. YOU HAVE SO MANY OF THEM ON YOUR WEBSITE-- people screaming they hate the new design and they didnt listen At All!! it was a move I hope cost them a lot of money >:( ) and now the site is practically dead. THEY USED TO HAVE CATAGORIES!! like you could search by art type: photography, brushes (for specific programs, too!!) traditional vs digital, fanart, sculptures, animations... etc!! and they got rid of that, making the search/filter system SUCK SO MUCH ASS. (they replaced it with something called topics. it doesn't have nearly as much categories, is not as easy to navigate, and is a lot harder to find stuff on...thanks DA...)

there's more, and i'm sure someone's done a more in depth post or even video on it but...god if you weren't there back then to compare, you'd have no idea how much it went downhill!! and there's no REALLY good alternatives rn :(

I miss tmm gang 😔 it really is harder to make friends on every other website im on!! the website I get the most feedback on my stuff now is actually ao3, but that's for my writing, not my actual art... ao3 needs to do a sister site for art ashshdf

the other day when I was devart to find old art, I was surprised to see I had 288 watchers on there! I assumed it was more because like, before I quit the website I had a good bit of interaction!! A lot of feedback, favorites, questions and fun convos!! It felt like a cozy lil community...

Whereas my art blog here has more followers than that and still a LOT less interaction. The rb to likes ratio is always so. So many more likes. And the fanart of course always gets more attention than oc stuff, which like on DA ppl asked after them and drew fanart and aaa... it was so sweet...

So like. Shoutout to ppl that rb my art. It means a lot and ilu!! (+100 love if u leave nice tags. +1000 if u do it for my oc posts)