#also pls let me know if you want to continue to be tagged! ik I’ve been tagging a lot of people recently 😭

[kozuyoko]

rant #2: internet watering down alt subcultures

(before or in case some ppl jump me in the replies i just want to clarify that ik this acc revolves around anime content but i’ve been into the goth subculture for a few yrs now and i don’t want ppl to think i’m a poser talking out of my ass just bc i don’t post or repost any goth topics/have a gothic style for my blog )

but um

why do ppl call anything remotely alternative ‘goth’ or ‘emo’…..

im sry but the ‘“i need a goth mommy’ or ‘i love goth girls’ mfs are actually unbearable like no u don’t even know what goth is, you just want a hypersexual e-girl with black hair and bangs with heavy eyeliner (same goes for the ‘i need a metalhead bf’ mfs who just want a tall guy w pretty long hair who plays the electric guitar)

those same ppl have started saying shit like ‘noooo i actually want a trad goth 🥺…um! well..no trad goth wants u..😁😁😁😅

like pls u didn’t know what a trad goth was until goth ppl started joking abt this sort of situation and using them as an examples for ‘goth girls’ that aren’t onlyfans models wearing skimpy black clothes and using goth as a buzzword for engagement, u just want to look good😭

also h8 the people that call themselves goth or emo and get defensive when u tell them they’re not bc they don’t even listen to the music or know about the culture of those scenes

‘omg im so emo😂😂😂’ be srs ur wearing a black t-shirt and u bully actual emos

and i’m not ‘gatekeeping’😭 u called ur self goth, we asked around and heard u said ur fav goth band is deftones LMAOO (b4 u get on my ass im not saying deftones is bad, theyre p cool, just not goth😭)

i genuinely fw people or babybats who take time to learn more about things they’re interested in rather than being an annoying trendhopper who thinks listening to shoegaze, wearing alt clothing and being freaky or smth makes them a ‘dommy goth gf’ or a metalhead😭

one of the biggest perpetrators of this have to be the is abt the tiktok #affliction #y2k #jncos male manipulator ushanka wearing cornballs. some of them r chill but a lot of them STINK!! bc of gekkasanctuary (zero hate i actually love him and follow him on all my ig accs ‼️) getting on some of their fyps they’ve started trendhopping once more and begun to waste their money on jp archive fashion and if six was nine just so they can thirst trap to malice mizer and tag their posts w #vkei. hate them💔

anywho this rant is mostly abt the watering down of the goth subculture and not vkei so don’t let me get carried away, i’ll probably rant abt this sometime next yr since i literally do not post at all😭😭

lastly i do NOT fw the onlyfans ladies who tag their posts w #gothgirl or gross captions with more ‘goth mommy’ stuff and continue to perpetuate stereotypes of all goth women being hyper sexual and dominant ☠️

if ur a goth lady and ur like this there isn’t anything wrong w it or wtv, you do you😭i really jus don’t like the stereotype bc it leads gross men to think all goths want to be sexualized without their consent, barked at in public and asked to peg someone (which has happened to me b4 sadly)

ummmm anwyays conclusion of this rant, i don’t fw trendhoppers , weirdos and ppl who water down alt subcultures and use them as buzzwords to perpetuate stereotypes

this is p much a word salad and nothing i wrote down is going thru my brain anymore so pls take this w a grain of salt, if i made any mean comments i was literally just pissed writing this 😭

[ggukminii]

tag your mutuals game! 🌼

I was tagged by @jkjms thank you love! 💕

why did you choose your url?

originally this blog was gonna be just for kookmin, so kookmin > ggukmin > ggukminii! I wanted to make the ends match in a way ajdjdj

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and explain why you have them.

this is my side blog! initially, i made this blog for just km stuff, but soon I was like, fuck it all bts stuff hereee

oH and I kind of have a thing where I create random urls? 😃 so I guess in actuality I have.. quite a few side blogs lmao why am I like this

how long have you been on tumblr?

this is kind of weird bUt you can actually be on tumblr and follow blogs without having an acount (at least at that time!) so i did that since february of 2019, i believe? LMAOO and then i made my account in june of 2019! so it’s been about two years already! ✨

do you have a queue tag?

yep! it’s queue never walk alone! mannn was it hard to choose a lyric SJDFKL

why did you start your blog in the first place?

i started this blog as a side one for just km content, but i soon realized i didn’t want to have two bts related accounts and so i continued using this account as my main one. ah and in terms of tumblr in general, I kind of moved on from another social and wanted a fresh, new place to talk about my love for bts so here we are 😃

why did you choose your icon?

that selca. took me OUT. I’m actually torn between it and some muster pics tho 👀

why did you choose your header?

oh my god i’ve been wanting to gif that mots on:e behind jk moment for so long, so i finally did it and made it my header a few days ago!

what’s your post with the most notes?

my same smile gif set!

how many people do you follow?

312

have you ever made a shit post?

I feel like every one of my posts except my gifs are shit posts 😫 lmao basically everything under my .txt tag! beware of my clear lack of braincells tho ;D

how often do you use tumblr?

this varies... but mostly at least once a day! oftentimes I’m just scrolling and liking posts!

did you have a fight/argument with a blog once? who won?

thankfully I have not :’)

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this post’?

ooh this is kind of hard. i think most of the time they’re justified! i’ve been thinking about this for a loong time, and i don’t really know exactly what type of posts fall under this category either SDJFLKS so imma just leave it at that :’D

do you like tag games?

ah ofc!! they’re honestly so fun to complete even though i take ages to do them :’)

do you like ask games?

hm i’ve never done an ask game before and i’m not sure anyone would participate if i do jsdflk but yea they seem so fun! 👀

which of you mutual do you think is tumblr famous?

if i’m being honest here... i think all my mutuals are tumblr famous. like. i’m always wondering how these wonderful people are actually following me 😭

do you have a crush on a mutual?

literally every single one, they’re all AMAZINGGG how could i not? 🥺 seriously though, i look up to all of them sooo much :( 💜

I tag @jimindelune @knjz @lq-jikook @gimbapchefs @calicooky @rosebowl @minyoongislaysme @jiminswn @themoonispurple7 @gukksluv @flowerkth @espressokookmin and everyone else who sees this, if you want to 💕

[ex-silent-reader]

Happy Holidays fic recs

Happy Holidays everybody!  I haven’t been commenting on posts individually like i normally like to so it’s kind of backed up a bit. I still really want to thank all the authors who have been sharing their stories with us and leave a lil itty bitty comment before I can expand on them for their own post so here’s that! Also I’ve seen a lot of undeserved negativity being spread to a lot of authors and I just want to thank you all for sharing your work on this platform FOR FREE and remind you that you literally owe us nothing and I’m super grateful that you continue to share with us. These are just some stories that I’ve read this week, i’d def like to do another of these soon :)

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own any of these stories, each story is owned by the author tagged next to the title and the summary is pulled verbatim from their page, in quotation marks. The only thing I own is gratitude towards these authors for sharing their work with us.

Also all stories are rated M 

Also, a loooot of stories have come out lately and I haven’t had a chance to get to a lot of them yet but i hope to soon so I’ll hopefully make another one of these soon, but yea pls know that I’m not purposefully ignoring or excluding anything or anyone.

Jin;

last christmas | ksj x reader - @xjoonchildx

“ summary: it was bound to happen, eventually. after months of near misses at barbecues and birthdays, there’s no avoiding your ex-husband at hoseok’s annual christmas bash. but it’s fine, totally fine, because you’re both adults – and you’ve both brought dates and booze. what could go wrong? “

This story was amazing! First of all, I love the comedy surrounding the entire situation, Hobi with his 8 trees and instigator Yoongi who also wants them to get their shit together for Hobi’s sake. I love all au’s but sometimes exes to lovers is difficult for me to side with because I don’t see how people can bounce back from so much hurt but in this story it felt very natural how they were able to find their way back together and I really enjoyed the insight to their relationship, especially near the end.

Yoongi;

CREAM & SUGA -  @snackhobi

“summary: yoongi is your favourite regular. he’s patient, polite, and predictable, a-large-black-coffee-to-go-please, no cream, no sugar, thank you. rinse and repeat. the seasons might change, but yoongi’s order stays the same.

and then one fateful day in winter, yoongi asks about the weekly specials, orders a cup of christmas and sugary sweetness, and everything starts changing.”

Ya’ll. Yoongi fics just truly hit different. The plot of this was so adorable and him going out of his way like that to keep her engaged was so cute and just very Yoongi like. I also just really loved the descriptions in this, like how oc described making the drinks, it just made everything seem so real.

universe | myg drabble - @personasintro

                           “❥𝒔𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔; you’re his whole universe, you just don’t know it yet – or him” 

ASDFGHJKL! Like, I really have no words for the way this made me feel. Like, ik it’s not a super healthy dynamic but the thought of a fixated Yoongi is.. I loved reading Yoongi being so fixated with oc and doing everything i his capability to meet her. I also was v interested in the part where he bumped into her and she didn’t react the way he expected because it made me think about how he (or any character’s with his mindset) cope when the fantast and reality don’t match.

Hobi;

 A Holly, Jolly Crisis (M) -  @kpopfanfictrash

* Blog doesn’t allow copy/paste and I wanted to respect that*

This story made me feel so many things. Like there’s so many layers to it and both of their hurt, her visiting him and feeling betrayed while he felt pushed aside. This story was so complex and both characters had so many layers to them, but it’s still sooo well written and I was invested the entire time. Like, I genuinely can’t get my feelings out in a brief way so I’m looking forward to screaming about this in it’s own post.

Joonie;

 my only wish - knj | m - @ppersonna

“✹ summary- There are few things you hate most in this world. Hornets, unnecessary fruit pieces in otherwise perfectly good jello, certain shades of orange… But nothing takes the cake more than two simple things. Christmas. And Kim Namjoon. So why did you agree to pretend to be Kim Namjoon’s girlfriend at his family Christmas party? Bah-Humbug. “

UM! Absolutely adored this story, of course it would be a fellow cream suit enthusiast who can bring so much justice to dreamy Joon. I loved how he was portrayed here and getting insight to both his and oc’s feelings made me root for them soooo hard.

new parent syndrome - @1kook

“ SUMMARY You love Namjoon, honest. But you love your daughter Hyejoo even more— it’s not a controversial sentiment when you know he’s the same way! —and going back to a regular adult life sans kids absolutely sucks. (Or so you thought.)”

The tag “dreamy husband joon” is extremelyyyy accurate. This story was just so cute and their relationship truly felt so intimate and lovely. Her being on the phone with Jimin while Joon was smash SENT me but it was also so hot like ASDFGHJKL that man can do no wrong tbh.

  laundry day - @snackhobi

“summary: You’ve been letting your laundry pile up for a little too long. Fortunately, your neighbour Namjoon is there to lend you a hand. “

Pls this was so hot. Like, I’ve made it very clear thus far that I’m a total simp for Joon, the thought of that man going strawberry picking and thinking to grab some for oc genuinely makes me SWOON. He’s an actual heartthrob.

   The Sweet in Sweet Potato - @sahmfanficbts

“ Summary: You’ve been roommates for years. Now that you’re catching feelings, it’s time to run away. “

This entire series has had me so invested but this chapter!!! I’m always a sucker for Joon but the way he was so clearly in her feels (for OC) but wanting to respect her need for distance, what a man. And I was so happy to see oc working through her feeling towards Joon.

Last Christmas (M) - @jjungkookislife

* Blog doesn’t allow copy/paste and I wanted to respect that*

Damn, I really love when a misunderstanding is such a big catalyst for a bunch of drama/angst. It just really ups the tension for me because as the reader I know it was a misunderstanding but clearly the character’s don’t, so it just makes me really eager to see how they make amends. I really enjoyed seeing them slowly make amends and grow. Also the buildup to them deciding to give the relationship another go made the ending soooo satisfying.

Jimin;

 picking petals｜pjm - @taestybae

“ summary ↣ you asked for a baby, so a baby is what you’re going to get. “

I really have no words for this, like it was so asaifgjhhkc. First of all, I really enjoyed that it was through his pov, i don’t typically read stories like that (I just don’t often come across them) but this still felt so natural that I didn’t even realize until right now, writing this comment. Also, the imagery was so well described and the anticipation built made this story so enjoyable.

Taehyung;

 Deepest Indulgence  - @scribblemetae

“ Description/Summary: The world is a mess, gangs, violence and rates of poverty are at an all time high since corporations took over everything. You built your Sex house to be a safe place and a sanctuary for those in need, promising to protect anybody who needs it. What happens when an extremely attractive and very rich man walks through the door begging for a job at Deepest Indulgence? The one sex house that wasn’t meant for men like himself. “

I AM SO EAGER FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER TO COME OUT. Like, idk how I can even describe this correctly but this just feel so much like Tae...???? Like idk if that makes sense but just Tae being this v sensual man, but there still being more to him than that, just makes so much sense and even the word “indulgence” is just so sensual and reminiscent of him. Also, the storyline so far is something I’ve personally never seen before and I’m super invested in this world and story already. Very eager to see how their relationship progresses.

 let it snow | kth - @suga-kookiemonster

* Blog doesn’t allow copy/paste and I wanted to respect that*

It’s the way I read this last night, it took me exactly an hour (3am to 4 am cause I’m a CLOWN), and I was so invested that I kept putting off sleep to finish it. Man, i’m a simp for this Tae (just like he is for oc lmao). I really enjoyed reading it and the mention of Jisoo earlier in the story had me on the edge of my seat the whole time wondering when things were gonna blow up. Everything was just so sweet and fluffy, and the confession really made me feel so soft for them both cause they both were so in their own heads and feelings they couldn’t see what was in front of them so I really enjoyed the confessions.

Jungkook;

Thank you, baby - @scribblemetae

“ Turns out the boy whos been stalking you for years has decided its about time he shows his face in the form of a picture, and decides its time to talk to you for real, in the form of a phone call. “

I genuinely don’t know how I can simp over this story in a short way but I’ll try my best. The characters are so complex and the storyline is twisted so many ways that make this so interesting to read and easy to become invested in. The way Jk is written, I understand why OC is lost on how to feel for him. Like, his actions are wrong, but actually meeting him and even seeing his though process, it’s hard to make him out to be the villian that his actions have categorized him as. I can’t wait to continue reading and write a full length comment about this!

FEED ME, FIGHT ME.  @yeojaa

“ What do you get when you mix a pissed off girlfriend with a neglectful boyfriend?  (Aside from trouble, that is.) “

I really enjoyed this, I love how aware of Jk and his boundaries the oc is and how she is cautious to walk the line and not push him too far while also letting him know how his actions make her feel. This just genuinely felt like a glimpse into a very real, very intimate relationship/moment and I loved that. I also just really love how this is written and I think you have a beautiful way with words. 

Chapstick - @softyoongiionly

“based on the time Jungkook said he needed someone to scold him so he’d remember to put lip balm on. Or Jungkook’s had a really long day and the only that can make it better, is seeing you. “

Idk if I’ve ever said it before, but I just love how you write relationships. Like, I can feel how comfortable they are with each other and how natural being together is for them. With your stories generally it just never feels forced and I really love that. I also really liked that we got Jk’s pov in the beginning, getting to see how tense he was really made me eager for their interactions and for him to feel comfortable and calm with her. Their interactions just felt so cute and natural and the end, assdjfhi, jk really deserves to be cherished and I loved seeing oc get him to the point of relaxation.

[majicmarker]

so i’ve had a lot on my mind lately — the good, the bad, the ugly, you know the drill. i’m used to the bad and the ugly, but i think (and ofc by my therapist’s rec) i need to give a little credit to the good, too. not to mention the good is largely comprised of people, and those people deserve a sports stadium wave, yk? idk shit abt sports, whatever, but i know what the wave is and it’s like the grandest gesture i can think of, SO

listen, y’all. to get real here, i hate fandom. my time spent therein has been hit-or-miss, but the misses got me hard and contributed to some major self-loathing, etc etc. we’re not gonna get into the specifics, i don’t owe that to anyone, but suffice it to say things got Rough.

but so much of it can be so, so good. and rn i want to keep on my rose-colored glasses, and the rosiest parts for me have always been @kitten1618x and @mygutsforgarters

(quite a few others, too, but i no longer have everyone’s info. and some ppl are newer friends, or relationships that have moved more slowly. i have mad love for u guys too, obvs, but ik melissa and gus irl so we know each other More and they’re who this post is rly about atm. pls know i don’t want to harsh on anyone’s feelings)

the tl;dr version of events is i met them both via fanfic. i happened upon theirs like “bitch!!!! **i** wanna do this, they’re bomb as hell” and then i made them be friends w me. they’ll tell you they wanted to be friends w me first, but that’s not important bc **i** am the one making this post, so they can both like,, suck it.

ANYWAY.

@ melissa : so bitch listen. here’s the thing abt melissa…… i found her while browsing jonsa fic back when i cared abt GOT, and she brought me back to what i loved so much abt romance when i first started, way back in junior high, what’s up. i bad a fascination w historial romantic epics for a loooooong time — those formative yrs, amirite ladies??? — but girl i could never write it so well as melissa. immediately she struck this balance between the drama you expect from historicals and the levity of a good romance, and i was just like, “hand to god this woman must be published already, surely???”

(she’s not, but that’s ridiculous so we’re gonna skip that)

(also she’s busy?? we’ve been friends for like six years and i will never know how many kids she actually has, but the point is she’s a goddamn superhero and i’m obsessed w her, MOVING ON)

i just Had to be her friend for two reasons: 1) she’s too talented, and b) i have said that abt 2 ppl my entire life and she was the first, so i was like, “AH YES MY HOLY GRAIL”

so ofc i slid into her DMs just as effectively as that one guy i had a crush on when i was sixteen and he’s still shooting me texts every valentine’s day bc of the societal pressures i guess (it is Far Less Effective these days, he’s my age and therefore too young for me, gross, but i digress), except me and melissa go way stronger.

she reminded me of why, half a lifetime ago, i started writing romance — bc it’s fun, bc i want to. bc i can do absolutely anything i want, bc who else is gonna read it but me and whoever i share it with? it was all up to me what i wanted to do with it, and i could do anything. nothing really mattered but what i wanted, and i hadn’t felt that way abt anything in such a long time — let alone abt something i used to love so much.

melissa’s writing is so beautiful, it’s everything i wanted to achieve when i was fifteen and never got around to perfecting. and i’m totally okay w that now, bc what do i need to do myself that she’s not already doing/wants to do in the future? when i found melissa’s writing i found a missing part of me — a part i’d maybe lost, maybe i gave it up, idk, but it was totally gone until i found her fics and they fucking clicked. i had to reach out bc there was a part of me that was a part of her, and she helped me find that again w/o even knowing it.

so i found melissa via GOT, and from the start she’d been trying to get me to write some bethyl. years and years, she dropped not-so-subtle hints — and by “hints,” i mean legit directives that i watch just enough TWD to write her some beth/daryl fic. real crafty, she is.

eventually the stars aligned: i was bored w the same dynamics i’d been writing for years, i wanted smthn new, i was restless, i was line editing a bethyl fic she’d written, and — again — this shit clicked. her fic made me want to explore this dynamic i’d never done before, so i watched the prerequisite episodes (no more than that tho, i super hate the show and i’m begging y’all to not @ me abt it anymore). i found smthn that i’d been missing, smthn that challenged and excited me and brought me back around to why i love romance and, more importantly, why i want to write it myself.

so as i was starting to write bethyl, i was poking around the ao3 tag to get a feel for what had been done, what hadn’t, anything i might be missing. and goddamn BAM —

@ gus : this is where u enter dramatically thru a red velvet curtain that i don’t wanna touch (Metaphorically bc you do romance better than me and i’m cool w that bc your talent simply Cannot be touched, and Literally bc i hate velvet) — i was like, “please for the love of god let her want to write contemporary romance, i need some good fckin food”

i happened upon “doo wah diddy diddy” first. ofc the summary hooked me, forget my usual hard no against pregnancy fics (i have issues w pregnancy and that’s all anybody Needs to know, back off), but This Bitch !!!!!!! has a way with words and i wanted to be friends w her straightaway. lmao too bad for her, now she’s stuck w me

gus’s fics gave me what i wanted without having to write it myself. her style is so distinctive, she hits the notes between porn and Actual Affection that is missing from uhhhh, every romance i’ve tried?? (why is everyone so intent on the sex part?? fckin chill. at best it’s unrelatable and at worst u sound like u’d rather wear someone than fuck them, check urself)

she writes w such care, she wants you to know what she’s doing here, and what she’s doing here is combining the physical and emotional needs of both characters w/o infringing on anyone’s comfortability. you root for these characters bc they simply want to be together, no strings (and if there are strings, damn, they talk abt it).

gus makes you believe in love in the modern age. like, not to sound like one of those ppl who post fckin “no one in this generation knows how to love!!!1!!11!!” memes on facebook, those are dumb, but gus’s writing made me think “yeah man, love ain’t dead, it’s just abt how we approach it.”

(if y’all haven’t guessed yet, i have some hang-ups abt relationships. i’ve goddamn earned those. but melissa and gus both brought me back to where i needed to be — in this place where, yeah, we’ve got some shit to deal with, but we all still deserve the things we want, and those things are achievable. i could not have gotten here without them, so jot that down.)

gus is Real, she’s funny, she’s unapologetic in the way she writes. ofc she has her personal hurdles, but who doesn’t?? and tbh nobody writes a sex scene like gus does. physical, realistic, but balanced w the emotional depth that makes you root for these characters bc you can Feel how much they want each other — not just sexually, but in the less-erotic aftermath of that passion. it continues to blow my mind, bc i’ve never seen anyone do what she does. i can’t even pinpoint the specifics, bc she just… Does It. and you’re reading it like “yeah bitch that’s it,” and That’s It.

it’s fckin wild.

these two — my best friends, the lights of my life, both of whom always make me crave chicken tenders at THE most inconvenient hours bc somehow we always talk abt chicken or ice cream or ultimately DQ, but they're both so hot idec — have something special.

i really, really want them both to know that: it’s not just in how they’ve treated me as a friend, but who they are as people, in their creative pursuits. i’ve never known support the way they’ve shown me; i’ve never known this much enthusiasm or investment or belief that i can do what i want with my talent. i want them to know that i feel the same way abt them and their works.

sometimes, when i look back at their writing that completely kicked my ass, i still can’t believe that they’ve become two of my best friends. it’s totally bonkers. they’re This Talented, and they wanna be friends w my spastic ass? GIRL. i’m out.

i’m not always the best at being present, at giving people what they need when they need it. but with everything that melissa and gus have given me in the past few years, i need them to know this — honey!!! i need all y’all to know this, bc i know fandom shit is hard, but you should know some of these friendships are so, so worth all that bullshit, so —

they have so much to give, so much to say, so much to offer. i could not have kept going without them. i couldn’t believe in myself without the faith they’ve given to me. i hope that i can always give that same faith right back.

and that, babes, is what real soulmates are all about.

[mikeshanlon]

Will you be continuing ribs? 🥺 it’s my favorite story in the fandom and I miss you and your writing. Pls don’t think I’m pressuring you into like writing or anything!! I’m not really good at expressing my love for things but I just really wanted to let you know that I love it so much

hey, thank you for your kind words! <3

I do intend to finish ribs, it’s a story i hold v close to my heart and want to do it justice, and, even tho it’s sort of unfathomable to me, ik others really enjoy and care about it too. However, i’ve been taking a little hiatus from writing ribs rn. At first it was just bc I was super busy from school, but when I tried to write again after the semester ended, I felt both discouraged bc I was so rusty, and also very disengaged from the characters and stuff, mostly bc of the fandom. i mean y’all kno how the fandom is, I was growing very tired of all the constant hate and fighting and weird shit going on. (also this doesn’t apply to any of the like anons or readers or whatever who interact with me y’all are so sweet!). essentially the only interactions about the fandom or just IT content in general were with my friends, and sometimes after a long break from writing a certain fandom it can be nice to peruse other fan content to get inspired, but the tags were essentially filled with like WILD shit that just made me feel so gross and sad lenlknerg. (im sure there is also good content out there of course, but going through a trove of harmful stuff is just not rlly something I want to do). (this is also sort of the reason i haven’t been online v much lately). so, everything I was writing was not up to the standard of what I wanted, i was going through some mental health stuff, and I felt too disconnected to pull through. Lately, I’ve been working on some other wips to get back into writing and just kinda play around without having the pressure of like adding to an ongoing fic with a story that I want to Get Right, which has actually been working p well for me and I’m enjoying writing again! so when I’m done with that I’ll kind of reassess and see if I wanna delve into ribs again, but it will happen eventually. sorry to all the readers who have been waiting hella long for an update, I do feel bad about pausing it bc of yall but also if I could’ve even finished a chapter it would’ve been half assed and Not Good so I’d rather come back with a clearer mind and better work for y’all. Y’all are already used to my late ass updates anyways erlgnregn. Thank you for sticking around<3

Tldr; yes, I do intend to finish ribs, it’s just on hiatus for a bit! thanks for reading and all the support<3333

[honeyfreckled]

Let’s have a convo!

right off the bat tagging a few bbs who idk might be interested 

@sebastiansloserclub @sgtbookybarnes @junk-food-forever @asadmarveltrashbag

Now that I’m fully investing myself in this, I am FULLY investigating.

I know a tiny bit of what is expected of me, what a few of you enjoy from me, and what tropes or characters and such the fandom fawns over in general. But----

I NEED to know what it is that will be what YOU in particular are interested in of my body of work/future projects. What is it that makes you wanna keep investing your time (and in the case of those who will subscribe- money) in me? Is there a certain thing I do that you could pinpoint and tell me you enjoy so that I could cater more to that?

Forget all those knee jerk responses ppl are prone to give on here along the lines of “oh, don’t care so much what your followers want! just go for whatever and do what you want!” as this goes against everything my research abt patreon says. On patreon I will need to know what it is that will incentivize subscribing as well as additional things I can put for you that will make subscribing to me that much more special and worth it. 

IMPORTANT!!!!! Prices STILL TBA. I’m looking arnd, I’m still researching and obvi my sense of worth is v low but also I just dont wanna break anyone’s pocketbooks or sound like i think I’m sooo important and worth soooo much money bc ik this is not the case lol and we all broke af out here okkkkk and this is still just my goofy ass weird stories and mdbds at the end of the day, so it’s not like I wanna charge an arm and a leg. That being said-

Is there anything you have seen others do that you would be interested in seeing me try? Are there things you would def be willing to pay for like certain fics or maybe access to how I edit or how I brainstorm and format? How I make moodboards? Music playlists I’ve made that are companions to the fics? Does seeing my handwritten outlines sound like something cool? What about if on a higher tier you were able to find out about the events that inspired content or get a special personalized moodboard or ficlet? Or have access to the nsfw content and the EXTREMELY nsfw stuff that gets dark, kinky, filled w taboos, etc? What abt access to my works that are NOT seb related? would any of that interest you?

Just let me know what would draw you in! Think about what you’ve seen on here of me and what it was that made u want to keep looking. Any info abt yr feelings/opinions/preferences surrounding my stuff that you can give me will be extremely beneficial in setting up my patreon so that it becomes somewhere you feel excited to stay tuned in to. I want this to be as worth it for y’all as possible! I want to give u what u want and continue to create for this fandom while still of course staying true to how I create outside of seb stuff and keep building on what I feel is content that goes beyond just a fandom centric body of work. 

pls don’t respond in replies- i am never able to view them. messages, sending me an ask, reblogging and commenting- all that is a much surer way of reaching me 

[verngyu-moved]

its the last month of 2017, and i wanted to make a special post to a few people i’ve met this year, and just express my gratitude. this was originally part of my follow forever, but i felt like it deserved its own post since i tend to ramble ◑.◑ my apologies to everyone mentioned in this since it’s kinda long + a lot of ppl are mentioned hdjfkgkdfl

amanda @beautifulshuas - amanda!! im really glad the time we had that suddenly super deep convo that u didnt feel like i was intruding on anything hahah. it was nice sharing that experience with u (but also sucky bc it’s not a good experience) and i look forward to more 1 am conversations about shitty relationship situations lmaooo

jennie @boosonseok - no offense but ur shitposts are the best thing in the entire fandom lbr, and i enjoy seeing a lot of divaboo on my dash, since he is like my little brother. i appreciate ur shadiness (u kno the time) and shoutout to the california bay area heheheh ＼(≧∇≦)/＼(≧∇≦)/

bonnie @cafewoozi - i think ive said this like 6 times but bonnie u!! are!! an angel!! i really appreciate all the help and advice you gave me this yr. u only say nice things abt ppls’ work and i still cant fathom that u actually....like....take time out of ur day to put smth nice on each post u reblog,,,, i can barely tag ppls names ??? a n g e l

kelsey @chanyoel - i lov eu thank u for putting up with w me yelling abt mingyu. u were the first person i converted to kpop.......bless. ur also one of the 5 ppl i actually text everyday (≧◡≦) u stick up for me, listen to me, and cry w me (its always bc of svt tho), thanks for being an amazing friend !!! also sorry for slacking off on @/ing u in jun posts..........i have the urge to @/you whenever i see him just kno that

sophia @gemhui - sorry i havent messaged u on tumblr much lately but ur still one of my best friends on this hellhole. weird to think we met thru another blog entirely when ur icon was scoups of ice cream and i messaged u abt it lololol thanks for being encouraging and so sweet all the time the world doesnt deserve u╰(◡‿◡✿╰) ps ur gay ashgdfjkldf

dana @jishua - dana m’luv thanks for letting me rant to u, ur rly one of the easiest ppl to talk to im so mad i waited so long to get to kno u, ur sense of humor is a+, u always have something positive to say, n ur also a #fellowcapricorn whaddup. remember the time i stayed up til 5 to watch the clap mv w u??? goOD TIMES.

jiyoon @jeonheart - jiyoon thank u for helping me learn how to gif stage performances, it prob seems like such a minor thing but it means a lot to me since i’d been trying to for abt a yr. u approached me and u didnt have to do that, and its very rare to see random acts of kindness on tumblr so i just wanted to thank u again ^^ i hope life is bein kind to u and ur in good health!!

stella @jeonqhcn - stella idk if youll see this but i hope school is going alright for u :( ur super smart (srsly) and really kind, ps jeonghan misses u (mingyu tells me jeonghan asks if you’ve said anything 2 me abt him) hope we get to talk more soon!!

adelin @pabospoiler - adelin its always a pleasure talking to u, esp when its about #tumblrstuff, since its nice to relate to someone else about being a content creator and the pros and cons of it. pls keep making ur stuff bc it is really good :( and u may not already kno this, but tbh, u are The™ Soonseok Gifmaker..............its u, bro.

renata @powerfulhoshi - u are one of the most encouraging ppl on here, ur full of nothing but positive light and energy.......u always make me feel less heavy when i talk to u, its refreshing. ur also one of the most under-appreciated content creators in this fandom,,,, wtf....im salty.....but im sure in 2018 u will be greeted w nothing but success and admiration !! bejos to u  (♥◡‿◡♥)

emmy @shuvee - emmy u are uber talented and uber intelligent!! i was not expecting to be ur friend considering u are Ultra Coole™ but its interesting talking about really serious stuff and bitching abt college :////, i didnt rly expect to ever talk to u......so im still in shock tbh. and to think this whole friendship was started bc i didnt know a ship name (wasnt it junshua)???? iconic

steffi @soonsyoung - stef idk i hope youll see this, but ik this yr has not been the greatest, but i love u i love u i love u. sorry for swerving down soonyoungs lane that 1 time. when things got shitty for me after everything that happened u were there for me, so just kno i will always be there 4 u, i miss u on here, but school is def more important and this site lowkey sucks lmao

rina @wonnwoo - !!!!! quite literally the wonwoo to my mingyu, the person who sees my ugliness and still ???? decides??? to stick w me ???? an angel. u give me the best gifts (u think im talking about the teen,age album but im rly talking about the **** and ****** recs). i will continue to better myself for the sake of u, so i can be strong for u, and help u when u need it. im #tsundere as u kno, so i apologize again if i seem cold i just jkdfglsdf have too many fluffy feelings to handle them correctly. i am also drafting a special w*nw** sm*t 4 u if u must kno

[cyjprojectarchive]

sorry 4 long post ahead ;________; i am a mushy blob rn

hi !! here i am , idk what i’m doing?? but! what i do know is that i want to appreciate so many people on here that i’ve met for the past 4 months i have been active on this tumblr~ 

i wasn’t expecting to meet so many lovely n kind n sweet individuals but i am so so so grateful i did. thru got7, i was able to come back to writing which i have put out there on this account and have received so many positive feedback and support for already and to that thank you !! i still have so much to improve on, but my heart is filled with joy knowing other people are going with me on this journey ^^

thru got7, and this might sound v v cheesy but !! i was able to become more positive within myself. talking to amazing human beans on here, sharing the love we all have for got7 made me think more on the bright side of life and therefore act accordingly. i will be eternally grateful for this influence in my life.

with that being said !! here are some people who i’ve had amazing encounters with and hopefully will continue to make more memories with each other. they deserve all the love they receive on this site - and more!

@artistia ; ana, u’ve been nothing but sweet in our convos & i’m so glad you approached me first. may our talks continue to lighten up our days in the long run. @cchoiyoungjae ; tae, i’m so thankful u’ve accepted my (not-so) discreet invitations of talking thru ur asks! heh, thank you for putting up with my anxious ass n ofc trusting me with ur stories, may we continue to learn more from each other’s experiences in life. @nctsjeffery ; kay, you’ve always been such a sweetheart, bb. i appreciate ur kindness and ur beauty n continue being ur gorgeous self! i love u. @dsouls ; ate pia, thank u for trusting me that i can support u with life stuff, pls remember i’m always here for times when u need to release them feelings, ok? ^^ @arimity ; nyx! the short talks we’ve had have been so cute n adorable. stay that way, alright!! @noirahgase ; sky, i miss u !:( i hope u are doing well n i’m still thinking abt u. i have yet to finish two worlds bec my heart couldn’t take the last three episodes ToT @x2jae ; aubry, i love u!! i’m so so happy i met you on here, ur writing is amazing n ur whole person is too - i’m so excited for the adventures awaiting u in the near future!! @redgyeomie ; katy, u’re the most genuine person ever!! i’m glad for our purposeful conversations n i wouldn’t trade meeting u on here for anyth.  @ilysmbam ; jem, how GLAD i am for initiating a convo with u !!! i feel so happy getting to know u better now & u just keeping shining n glowing in my eyes. i love u n i can’t wait for u to own university!! @cuddly2jae ; jane, i know we haven’t talked a lot yet, but i am certain that will change overtime n i’m so excited for ur future as well!! remember i’m your ate n if anyone messes with u, they go thru me first, ha?  @yougjae ; cherry, ik we’ve only talked thru asks or whatnot, but i am still very appreciative of ur existence n am glad we are existing together here. i love u n if u ever ever need anyth at all, i’m a message away ^^ @2jaekisses ; maram!! ah, i love u n thank u for being sososo kind to me from the start with everything, as in everything!! ur kindness shines thru on this site n i’m blessed to have known you here.

to the networks who have accepted me, a massive thank u ;(((( without u, i wouldn’t have grown out of my shell on here and interact with anyone at all! @choiyoungjaenet ; @got7hyungnet ; @got7maknaelinenet ; @kreativewritersnet ; @got7snet

special mention to my irls @dead-meme-walking thx for tolerating the kpop on ur dash tavio heh n @reblogsalot my gf who wanted to be included here even tho she only goes on tumblr thirty minutes a day at school - when she’s lucky sdjhd love you.

ALSO!! to my cute kitty anon !!! i love u n pls believe me ur messages have always brightened up my days, always wishing u the best in life.

and to my mutuals, thank u!! for following a dork like me. i love seeing everyone on my dash and i try my hardest to interact with so many of you lovely human beans on here. keep smiling, my dears, keep saving this world from its cruel nature. 

✦ - loving u from afar, ilu always take care we don’t talk much but. i luv u. 💌 - messaged here n there along the way. luv u n keep spreading ur positivity.

@jbssi ✦  / @saltygot7 💌 / @ifyoudomv ✦  / @high-on-food 💌 / @softyugie ✦ / @jjbroject ✦ / @cyjsgirl ✦ / @peachjy ✦ / @melaninbam ✦ / @iloveujaebum ✦ / @gotday6 💌 / @teenymark ✦ / @arsjae ✦ / @yugy ✦ / @suqarjae 💌 / @softpinkyugyeom  💌 / @iloveyugy 💌  / @flight-logs ✦ / @ulttuan 💌 / @mumbleybummie 💌 / @cypherwang 💌  / @youngjace   ✦ / @vibetechs  💌 / @jinyoungslover 💌 / @jajajaebum 💌  / @blessjinyoung 💌 / @jackson-wang-tbh ✦ / @youngjaeded ✦ / @choiyoungjae 💌 / @ult2jae 💌 / @mintyugbam 💌 / @cyjyaa ✦ / @okjb  ✦ / @jelllybum ✦ / @sugarplumjae ✦ / @43hy ✦ / @chambaeq 💌  / @otteryj ✦  / @gyeomiekim ✦ / @byepink ✦ / @markeu-poo 💌 / @pbandj-hope ✦ / @markiepoohismysunshine ✦ / @rudeboywonho ✦ / @sugarplumjae ✦ / @guksuu ✦ / @ultcyjs ✦ / @smiley-jaebum ✦ / @royalkpop ✦ / @poeticyoungjae 💌  / @awkwardlyjin ✦ / @markiepoostudies ✦ / @doublebammie 💌 / @denimin ✦ / @monbeboo ✦ / @wang-thighs ✦ / @suburbiataehyung ✦ / @lightsunshine ✦ / @333olive333 ✦ / @hypetae ✦ / @uncooliscool ✦ / @got7ie ✦ / @banuan2kin ✦ / @lovelykth ✦ / @uhyn ✦ / @626mark ✦ / @gotchicken  ✦ heh

non mutuals therefore i am 2 shy 2 tag ;;;; but check em out they’re super hella rad so !!!

jinyoungslegs / bamsbutt / got7doubleb / smallchoi / pinkhoodiemark / artist-aroha / shouldveheldon /  binsblush / softjikookie / imjaebeomtrash / heybinnie / starrycranes / 1996yj / sanhapup / asterocky / binsmoon / m-yien / jingogi / taetaetuan / park9495 / markificent / the-princejinyoung / marksseunie / ungiis / bamslegs / kihyunswife / w-onpil / imeightout / jaebumsyoungjae / ethereal-youngjae / its-youngk / youngk93 / mkcyj / bamethyst / blackpink / officialjjproject / ukihyunnie / memento-moree / jjverse2 / jaechicken / kissbbom / parkjinyoungology / tuanpumpkins / mochimork / huggableyoungjae / leaderbum / jypnior

‘til the next one ^^ ~

i did the ‘cover’ thing myself n i’m so sorry if it’s uglie my hand was shaking i haven’t practiced my lettering in a while ;;; AND THE BIRDS....LET’S NOT TALK ABT THT.

[anything-advice-blog]

Submission - Crush

Hi! Ok so basically, there’s this guy. I guess you could call him my hallway crush, to a certain extent. He’s a year older than me, so we’ve never talked before and I doubt he even knows who I am. He and my brother used to know each other a couple years back, and I have a friend who’s known him since elementary school (but they don’t really speak to each other) and who’s families are close. Other than that, I have no connections to him.

I’ve reached the point where an innocent crush has become something of an obsession with him, and it’s really bringing me down. It all started at the beginning of the summer when this group chat I was on started talking about him (he’s a hot shot at my school - you would be hard pressed to find a single person who doesn’t know his name), so I went and followed him on ig and he followed back within like five minutes. I creeped on his feed and discovered, yup, I can see why all the girls at my school are in love with him. It’s unfair how ridiculously attractive he is. I mean. Tall. Super athletic. Super smart. Perpetually ruffled hair. Boyish smile. Bruh.

Then over the summer I kinda forgot about it, but on the first day back to school I saw him in person for the first time ever - and that was it for me. I was a complete goner. After that, I started digging around and talking to ppl to see what they knew about him.

According to my brother, he’s a “cool dude.” According to my friend who is family friends with him, he’s always nice and polite when he talks to her at get togethers. According to two of my friends in the same grade as him and have actually had classes with him, he’s borderline cocky and a “tool,” though I’m not sure how my friend meant that. He’s a pretty controversial person, apparently.

On top of that, nobody knows if he’s ever dated anybody, and there are even rumours that he’s gay, in which case, according to one of my friends, I’d be “wasting my time” pursuing him.

I’ve been a complete creep the past month when it comes to him. It’s embarrassing. Like, I’ve rerouted my walk to one of my classes just to pass his locker with my friend, and sometimes just seeing him there instantly becomes a highlight of my day (ik how sad that sounds) bc our schedules never overlap. Every now and then I’ll see him around school by complete chance, and I’m always left grinning like an idiot bc wow thx universe for that random reminder that he exists. When my sport season was on, my team would be out on the field practicing at the same time that he’d be out there with the football team. And I was like??? Athletic ppl are so great?? I just love watching people who are so at home in their sport and all their actions are so fluid and graceful omg???? This guy is such an impressive athlete like wow.

I don’t know what I want from this. My friends want me to just talk to him, but I don’t know if that’s what I want. I like having this kinda side crush, just staying on the outside and not making any attempt to move in. Maybe I’m just scared that I’ll be completely turned off by him as a person. Maybe I’m scared that I’ll end up just falling even harder for him, and this time it’ll actually have meaning rather than just him being a pretty face in the hallway. That sounds so awful, I’m so sorry, but I mean I don’t know what I want to come out of this.

Of course I’m interested in getting to know him as a person. Of course I’m open to talking to him and whatever. But I guess I’m only human - I’m scared of rejection. Or not feeling anything. My teacher once told us a story of how she fell head over heels for a coworker, but once she actually got to know him there was just no spark. Idk.

I’m so sorry for how stereotypical this submission is! I’ve just been completely consumed by infatuation for this poor guy who has half the school thirsting after him, most of whom are complete strangers to him (myself included). Like, he’s close to celeb status at my school.These girls I know even asked to take a picture with him after a football game and it was the most uncomfortable thing I ever witnessed. It’s kind of absurd, the way people treat him. I don’t want to be another one of those people to him. Idk. I feel like if I ever got to know him, and if he ever got to know me, I just want it to mean something - for both of us.

Do you guys have any tips or advice? How to talk to him? How to get over it and move on with my life? How to deal, in general? Any pointers would be greatly appreciated!! Thank you so much for your time!!

(Pls tag “baby”)

Hey there,

Your feelings towards this guy are not creepy or anything of the sort, you are simply attracted to him, and it is further intensified as you have not yet had a chance to really get to know him. This can really play on your mind and he becomes almost somewhat mysterious to you - which is where the “obsession” element comes in. This is where the stage of a “crush” can escalate into feelings which takes over your life and thoughts, and you obsess over him because the intrigue allows your mind to create scenarios and ideas about him in order to fill the gap from what you actually don’t know about him. You begin to idolise them and think of them constantly as the case is, you want to know more.

I do agree that at this point you seem scared to put yourself out there just to protect yourself from rejection, and that’s okay and completely normal because sometimes you think the worst will happen in order to not be disappointed if it actually does happen - a way of “protecting” our feelings which is something we tend to do. You don’t want what you idolised of him and what you think he would be like, to not be true, and the possibility of everything that you built up in your head at this point about him to be wrong makes you scared (for example, not actually getting along with them that well or the spark to not be there). You have probably got comfortable in the way you feel also - as you said just to keep as a “side crush” because this takes you away from having to face the reality of the situation.

As scary as it will be (trust me I know!) I genuinely believe that it’s a good idea to just approach him and speak to him, even something as simple as “hey I’ve just noticed you around and I wanted to introduce myself”, or mention that you’ve heard about him through your brother/friend which knows him. You may be pleasantly surprised to see that he’ll actually respond to this and this becomes a starting point to having more conversations with him in future possibly. The hardest part is the literal approaching but once the first sentence is out, the rest can become easier based on how you get along with them, if you naturally click with someone, you will start to feel more comfortable and that in itself will be an indicator of if you will be interested in someone like him or not.

Unless you try to get to know him, you have no opportunity to find out where you stand. You’ll always fantasise him from a far as something really really great - but in actuality you may not even like him much past his looks. How will you know? You need to do your own digging to find out for yourself. If you find you’re not compatible, it can make it a whole deal easier for you to evaluate and be clearer on your own feelings, and vice versa if you are compatible. You may speak with him and down the line build a really good connection together, as friends or something more - then this can help you to decide if you want to continue spending time with him or not. Eitherway, you need to establish some kind of relationship with him to find out the true clarity of how you feel on whether you truly like him for his personality and the whole package, or just on a surface level for his looks and reputation.

My own biggest regret is that my own self doubt told me not to pursue someone I liked because I felt I wasn’t good enough and was scared we wouldn’t really get along, and now I still don’t know where I stand in that situation, it becomes a “what if” and I actually would have benefitted more to speak and get to know that person further - and the same applies here, the feeling of “what if” can be even worse than actually going there with someone, experiencing something whether it goes good or bad will allow you to take  something you can learn about yourself or relationships, so nothing is wasted time for you. Don’t let the fear be strong enough to throw you off and stop you - you have to really tell yourself it’s going to be okay and you can do it, because it is and you can. Feel the fear and do it anyway, I promise you’ll be fine.

Hope it goes well and take care of yourself for me,

Ellie x