#also ough I love being with the kids... being a youth leader is so so fulfilling
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#HNNNNNN#survived a full youth group overnighter none the worse for wear!!#despite some hits to my pride (wiffle ball. also I lost at foosball several times alas) I think mayhaps I am even better for it#had a full functional one on one conversation with the sound guy which was. wild#but I was just wondering how long he'd been doing production stuff so I asked and we talked about it for?? several minutes???#also girl it's so weird bc I really really do not want children but how is it that watching him be SO good with kids#is one of the most goshdang attractive things I've ever seen#like it's almost cognitive dissonance bc I can't stand the thought of having kids but I also love doing youth group#and also that is. very attractive to me that the sound guy is so good with kids.#I spent like half the time watching people play ping pong. I played ping pong a little bit too as previously mentioned#also ough I love being with the kids... being a youth leader is so so fulfilling#like I never thought it was a ''calling'' until this year but it fills me up so much#and I think the kids like me#at least one girl in particular likes me skdkfnskgnskgns#even though I'm a doof and don't know how to play baseball#I just hope that my motivations are for THEM and not for ME yknow??#Lu rambles
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