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johnhardinsawyer · 7 months ago

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Because I Met You. . .

John Sawyer

Bedford Presbyterian Church

4 / 21 / 24 – Fourth Sunday of Easter

Psalm 23

1 Thessalonians 1:1-10

Acts 17:1-9

“Because I Met You. . .”

(Person to Person)

Happy almost-Earth-Day to all who celebrate! On Earth Day, I do think about the ways we are called to care for God’s creation. But also, I always think of my friend, Ryan Triesenberg. I may have told this story before, but almost 30 years ago, on Earth Day, Ryan called me to see if I wanted to go to an Earth Day concert, down by the Ocmulgee River, in Macon, Georgia. We took Ryan’s little sister, Kendra, with us.

Since we were in Macon, Georgia – not far from the resting place of members of the Allman Brothers Band – some of the music we heard at the concert that day had that kind of Southern-Rock flavor. And, for the most part, it sounded really good. But then, as the sun set, a different kind of band took the stage to close the show – kind of a Goth-Heavy Metal-Sludge-Industrial-Screamo band – not exactly what many folks think of when they think “Earth Day Concert.” But hey, don’t judge a book by its cover. Anyway, at one point, the singer (or, rather, front man) of this somewhat-baffling Earth Day Concert closer screamed into the microphone, “Is everybody having a good time?!?!?” “Um. . . Yes!” we yelled back, somewhat hesitantly. “Well,” the front man yelled, “I don’t like any of you!!!!” He actually used language that was a bit more rude than that, and if I’d had my wits about me, I would have yelled back, “And also with you!” or “And Happy Earth Day to you, Sir!” Before the band played its next song, the front man said, “Umm. . . we have some cassette tapes for sale back at the soundboard, so. . . thanks!”

[Now, just in case you’re wondering, a cassette tape was this plastic thing with two spools of magnetic tape inside that you could use to listen to music on your Sony Walkman. It was cutting-edge technology.] And, just in case you’re wondering, I did not purchase a cassette tape at the soundboard that night.

Tomorrow being Earth Day, chances are that either I will call Ryan, or he will call me and will ask one simple question: “Is everybody having a good time?!?!?”

Because I met Ryan Triesenberg, I have this silly memory and crazy story to tell. And, because it’s almost Earth Day, of course, I’m going to think of my friend, Ryan. My experience with Ryan on that long-ago Earth Day did not really change the trajectory of my life. But knowing Ryan did. Because I met Ryan and his loving parents, they helped me through some rough times in my college years. Even though I was suffering through a bout of debilitating depression, I was able to be myself around them. When life was overwhelming, Ryan’s parents, Paul and Lee would sometimes come by the dorm and pick up my dirty laundry – returning it to me, folded and smelling fresh. They would have me over for dinner, and give me rides around town, and treat me like another son. Oh, how blessed I was by their Holy hospitality. God changed my life.

Many of you can probably point to a relationship that has changed the trajectory of your life. Because you met someone, your life turned out different from how it might have. For example, because I met Karl MacMillan when we were in the 7th grade band at Miller Middle School, he introduced me to Amy Wolfe, a fellow student at Miller Middle School and the trajectory of my life changed dramatically. Many years later, Amy Wolfe and I will be celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary next month. Because I met Amy, and teachers, and choir directors, and professors, and certain friends over the years – oh, and my own family, of course – my life has turned out the way it has because the Holy Spirit has been at work through people. Many of you could probably name people who have had a similar and significant impact on your own life because God was working through them, too.

Today, as we settle back in to the overview of the Bible through the Narrative Lectionary that we began, together, back in September, our two scripture readings are all about how the Holy Spirit has been at work, changing lives, in a city called Thessalonica.

Now, before we arrive in Thessalonica with Paul and Silas, it is important for us to explore just how it is that the Holy Spirit connects and works through a community of people. Jürgen Moltmann, a theologian from Germany, writes that the Spirit is the one indispensable element for human survival and that,

. . . God the Spirit creates the network of social relationships in which life comes into being, blossoms, and becomes fruitful. . . Life comes into being out of community, and wherever communities spring up which make life possible and further it, the divine Spirit is efficacious. . . The creation of community is evidently the goal of God’s life-giving Spirit in the world of nature and human beings.[1]

In the beautiful mythic account of creation from Book of Genesis, God says,“It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.” (Genesis 2:17) God has always been at work, creating and building community between human beings through the life-giving movement of the Holy Spirit.

The early ministry of Jesus is a beautiful example of this kind of community – how Jesus calls and draws people together from all walks of life and how the disciples live together and support one another along the way. All of this occurs after Jesus is baptized and the Holy Spirit is poured out upon him and hovers over him.[2] At some point, this community surrounding Jesus attracts a man named Silas, who becomes a leader among the followers of Jesus in Jerusalem.[3] We don’t know whether Silas has joined the community before or after the death and resurrection of Jesus (there is no mention of Silas in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John) but after the day of Pentecost, when the Holy Spirit has arrived in full and Silas is serving in Jerusalem, an apostle named Paul comes to town.

Now, Paul’s reputation precedes him. Paul did not start out as a follower of Jesus. He actually violently persecuted some of the followers of Jesus. But then Paul met Jesus. And because Paul met Jesus, Paul’s life was changed in a powerful way – sending him on a different trajectory, out into the non-Jewish world of the Gentiles to proclaim the good news and found new communities of faith with the Spirit’s help.

Prior to this, the disciples who have been in Jerusalem and are all Jewish, by birth and faith, have been of a mind that the good news of Jesus Christ is just for the Jews. But Paul has been out in the non-Jewish Gentile regions of Asia (present-day Turkey) and has seen what the Holy Spirit has done in the lives of all who hear and receive the good news of Jesus. Adding to this, Peter – yes, that Peter, the sometimes-bumbling disciple of Jesus – has also been among the Gentiles and has become convinced that the good news is not just for the Jews.

By the time Paul and Silas arrive in Thessalonica, the city is about 400 years old. The city – named after Alexander the Great’s sister – is the second-largest city in Greece and, for centuries, served as almost a co-capital of Greece with the city of Athens.[4]

When Paul and Silas get to town, Thessalonica is a pretty happening place, culturally speaking, where there are a lot of ideas – old and new – being discussed. But when Paul and Silas start to share this “new idea” that God’s love in Jesus Christ is for all people arguing this in the Jewish synagogue there for three consecutive weeks, they meet some resistance. In today’s reading, we find that Paul persuades some of the people in the synagogue, but that he also persuades “a great many of the devout [Gentile] Greeks and not a few of the leading women.” (Acts 17:4)

Some of the “unpersuaded” members of the synagogue get jealous. Imagine that your spouse suddenly starts thinking and believing things that you find unacceptable. “Is everybody having a good time in Thessalonica?” No, people’s spouses have started thinking and believing the same things as the Gentiles and these upstart folks from Jerusalem. Jealousy often leads to sore feelings and sometimes leads to violence. So, these unpersuaded jealous people form a mob in the marketplaces and begin to cause an uproar in the city.

They go to the home of someone named Jason – a man who had opened his home to Paul and Silas, letting them stay with him – and the mob attacks the house.

There is so much going on in this story. Imagine this strange – yet spiritual – sequence of events: Because Paul and Silas meet Jesus, their lives change and they carry the good news of Jesus with them on a long journey – meeting a lot of people along the way. And because Paul and Silas are led by the Spirit to the city of Macedonia and to the synagogue there, all of a sudden, Jason’s house is being ransacked by an angry mob who then drags Jason and some others before the city authorities where they are accused of going against the Roman empire. Apparently, according to Paul and Silas, (and these local troublemakers like Jason), there is another empire. . . the kingdom of God, that is at work through the Holy Spirit – alive, and at work, and moving in and through the people of God. Person to person. Spirit through person. Spirit through people through history.

This is what Paul highlights in his letter to the Thessalonians, written in the months and years after his visit to the city.

“. . . [O]ur message of the gospel came to you to in word only, but also in power and in the Holy Spirit. . . in spite of persecution you received the word with joy inspired by the Holy Spirit, so that you became an example to all the believers in Macedonia [and beyond]. . . For the people of those regions report about us what kind of welcome we had among you. . .” (1 Thessalonians 1:5-9)[5]

In other words, “Everyone has been talking about you Thessalonians and your courageous hospitality. This would not have happened without the Holy Spirit at work among you.”

“Because we met you,” Paul is saying, “you also met Jesus. And, because you met Jesus, you met the Holy Spirit. And, because you met the Holy Spirit, evidence of the Spirit has been seen in your gracious actions under difficult circumstances. And, because of your gracious actions (which are a fruit of the Holy Spirit in your life), the Spirit is ‘turning the world upside down’ because it is changing the trajectory of peoples’ lives – turning them toward the kingdom of God and all that comes with it.”

Just because we meet Jesus and the Holy Spirit is at work within our hearts and minds, it doesn’t mean that life will always go our way. In fact, history has shown that people who are led by the Spirit are sometimes led into and through difficult – even dangerous – circumstances. They sometimes take risks for Jesus – speaking truth to power, welcoming the outsider, making the gracious choice, the generous choice, the loving choice, the more difficult choice. And yet, they believe – we believe – that we have a loving God who is with us through it all – through death’s dark valley, all the way to the table in God’s kingdom.

How has Jesus changed your life? How has the Spirit led you to unexpected places? How is God – even now – leading you forward in life? Who is God working through – even now – to make a difference in your own life? How is God working through you – today – to make a difference in the lives of others?

May the Spirit open our eyes, and ears, and minds, and hearts to see, and hear, and know, and live the good news of Jesus Christ. May the Spirit make us vessels, conduits, carriers, sharers of grace to all people, at all times, and in all circumstances.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

......

[1] Jurgen Moltmann, The Spirit of Life: A Universal Affirmation (Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 1994) 219.

[2] See Matthew 3:13-17, Mark 1:9-11, Luke 3:21-22, and John 1:29-34.

[3] See Acts 15:22.

[4] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thessaloniki.

[5] Paraphrased, JHS.

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stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland · 4 years ago

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There is a light at the end of the tunnel

Hello, Stuck. Sorry, I don’t know your real name.

I wrote this long ass post to bring some light into the fandom and between the CSs, and I hope you can post it? I’m new in the Tumblr world, but not in the 5H fandom. I don’t quite know how it works yet and, for the moment, I only know your blog and those of @emisonme, @karlaswine, @sun-to-my-luna, @underthatimpression, and @mentesimploria because, in one way or another, you’re all connected to each other. I just wanted to tell you guys how much I appreciate every single one of you, the passion you have, and the hope you keep alive among those who, like me, love the girls. Also, the patience you guys have, especially against the haters, is admirable. I love the fact that you keep going. Because this is your sacred place, as it should be.

This is the very first time I’ve ever done anything like this. I’m what can be defined as a ‘silent fan’. I never commented on anything in the girls’ posts, not even on the fan accounts I follow. I don’t have Twitter. I have Facebook but it’s like I don’t have it because I don’t use it. I have Wattpad (obviously). I recently registered here on Tumblr, and I have Instagram. That’s what I use. It’s the only app along with YouTube that I use daily to keep up with the rest of the world. Especially the American part of the world. I’m Italian, but I speak American English well, and I apologize in advance if my lazy ass hasn’t noticed possible grammatical errors. I saw that a lot of you are into this stuff, so I thought I’d add it just because. I’m a Capricorn Sun, Cancer Moon, and Virgo rising.

I’m gonna turn 29 on December 22, and this is a BIG fuck off to all the people who have attacked you lately for your age. This is personal information that I give freely to make ignorant and small-minded people understand that, in this context especially, age is irrelevant. As you, little fucker who hides behind a computer to attack people just to feel stronger, have a life, we have it too. Like you, we have a life, a job, friends, etc. We also have passions. Passions that yes, my dear haters, also include shipping people. I don’t know why in your stupid brain we’re too old to ship people we love and to give opinions about it. I didn’t know it was something reserved only for those who still smell like mommy’s milk. But anyway…

I became aware of 5H existence just before summer 2015 thanks to ‘Worth It’. Being Italian, however, I had no idea who they were, and to be honest, I didn’t go searching for them. Randomly one day then, I ran into Camren on YouTube. I can’t remember which video I was watching, but I know for sure it was about ‘Heya/Brittana’ (Heather Morris and Naya Rivera/Brittany and Santana, my very first hard LGBT ship). And among the suggested videos, there they are. As ridiculous as it sounds, and although I liked them as soon as I saw them, I didn’t go searching for them. I did it when ‘Work from Home’ came out though. From there, I connected that they were the same ‘Worth It’ group and the same two girls I liked from those YouTube videos. I had officially become a fan. I was screwed. Screwed because, I’d officially entered one of the most messed up and yet most beautiful fandoms ever.

As I initially said, this is the very first time I’ve ever done anything like this. But after the recent events, seeing how many people gave up, it made me a little angry and gave me the strength to speak for the first time. I thought the first time would’ve been through the fanfiction I’ve been working on for over two years, but no. Lauren and her beautiful mouth had to terrorize, disappoint, panic, and make angry 80% of CS, thus fueling the hatred of all the other fandom towards us. So I decided to speak now. Maybe, just maybe, this very long ass post of mine is gonna help struggling CS. Maybe, just maybe, it’s gonna make them reason and bring them to their senses.

So. This, as I think you’ve understood, is about Lauren and what she said in the podcast. This is a reminder of the Laucy situation. These are things we already know and that I want to remind you of because apparently, my lovely fellows CS, either you have a short-term memory, or Lauren has the power to create amnesia in people’s minds and I knew nothing about it. Surely this power of hers didn’t work on me and a few others.

Oh and, before starting: 1) You may disagree with me. It’s normal to have different opinions. 2) You can search for information such as dates, easily on the internet. 3) I’m gonna use nicknames on PRs for fun. That doesn’t mean I hate them. I have my reasons for dislike each one of them as people, but I can assure you it has nothing to do with the fact that they were or are the Camren beards. An example to make you understand what I mean is Ty. I’m a huge Ari fan and I’ve been listening to ‘safety net’ non-stop for two days straight. I really dislike Ty as a person, but I separate the art from the artist.

Okay, that said, I can start.

Lauren said: “I knew I was queer because I fell in love with my best friend when I was like 15.” – “Her and I started to have a physical connection when I was 15.”

Lauren and Lucid Vivisectionist met when L moved to Carrollton in 7th grade. Lucille moved back to Puerto Rico in February 2012, returning to visit Miami occasionally (this explains the fetus pictures with Lucy and Camren at L’s house). In February 2012, Lauren was 15, Camila 14, and Lucy 16. And who did Lauren meet when she was 15? Oh yeah, Camila. C and L did the first phase of the audition, the ‘cattle call’, on May 1, 2012 in Greensboro, North Carolina. Audition where Camila took courage to speak at the (“Oh my God that girl is) literally so beautiful” girl from which she felt intimidated by starting that adorable brief conversation “Hi, I like your shirt”, “Thanks. I like your jacket” just before it was her turn to get in for her audition. In May 2012, Lauren and Camila were both 15 years old. Lauren and Camila saw each other again for the first time on July 25th, two months later, in Miami on the first day of boot camp, and it was Lauren herself who went to Camila: “You’re the Cuban girl!”. In July 2012, Lauren was 16 and Camila was 15.

Lauren said: “She came back into my life when I was 18. I was on tour and I was in my room in a hotel somewhere, and she called me.” Let me explain to you why I think this is true.

Lauren and Luxy reconnected with each other after Lucy’s car accident that took place on May 15, 2015. Lauren was really 18 in May 2015, and we can rule out The Reflection Tour dates because it started on February 27, 2015, and ended April 6, 2015. We can also rule out these other show dates that 5H did: April 11 in Jackson Township, New Jersey - April 13 at Live! with Kelly and Michael in New York - April 19 Lauren was at Coachella with Keana, Britt, and other friends - April 22 at the Worldwide Radio Summit in Hollywood - April 25 at Radio Disney Music Awards 2015 in Los Angeles - May 8 at Channel 93.3 Summer Kickoff 2015 in Chula Vista, San Diego - May 9 at Wango Tango 2015 in Carson, Los Angeles (May 9, rumors about Camila and Louis Tomlinson just because paparazzi believed they were together when Louis was actually together with Liam outside the Project Club L.A., and C who was at the club next door) - May 15 at KDWB Radio Show in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

The rest of their program and possible date: May 16 at Kiss Concert 2015 in Mansfield, Massachusetts - May 19 at Dancing with the Stars in Los Angeles - May 30 at G-A-Y in London (rumors about Lauren and Louis Tomlinson this time, born because 5H went to Libertine nightclub with Louis and Niall) - May 31 at Britain’s Got More Talent in London - June 2 at Capital FM in Birmingham, England - June 5 at Good Morning Britain in London - June 6 at Capital FM Summertime Ball 2015 in London - June 12 at Aloha Stadium in Honolulu, Hawaii - June 14 at LA Pride 2015 - June 18 at Jimmy Kimmel Live in Los Angeles - June 20 at B96 Pepsi Summer Bash 2015 in Bridgeview, Illinois - June 23 at San Diego County Fair 2015 - 28 June at Show Of The Summer 2015 in Hershey, Pennsylvania - July 10 at Rockefeller Plaza in New York. July 15, 2015, beginning of Reflection: The Summer Tour.

June 27, 2015 Lauren turned 19, and do you guys remember the events of those days? Because I do.

On June 24, 2015, Lauren celebrated her birthday in advance at the famous sushi restaurant ‘Katsuya’. Among the guests were the girls, her mom Clara, some friends, including Jill (the same Jill/Jillian Gutowitz who worked with Zack Sang and who 5H met on April 22, 2015, at the Worldwide Radio Summit, which lasted for three days but they were present for two: 22 and 23. The same Jill who wrote the article for AfterEllen on January 25, 2016, about her experiences with women who denied their sexuality. Remember the story of Lauren Jordan, right?), and Noah Benardout (may he rest in peace). Still no Lucia, not even on the days when Lauren returned to Miami to celebrate with her family before resuming the program from the 28. As I already said, The Reflection Summer Tour began on July 15, 2015, and Lucy’s first public reappearance took place on one of the tour dates, that is, July 27 at Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

From that moment on, we saw Lucille appear on multiple occasions in hops through time. After the July 27th date, we saw her during the trip to Hawaii with Lauren and Keana in September, followed by the concert that the girls had on October 10 in the Bahamas, where they stayed with their families and friends for a few days. After the Bahamas, the mess happened between 5H because they found out about Camila’s departure from the group which initially should’ve been immediate, but for which they fought and gained another year. That, was also the time when Laucy signed their PR contract. As we know from Lauren herself, that was the worst and darkest time for her. That was the beginning of her numbness.

On October 23, they were on their way to Italy and Lauren wrote on her dark diary, the one shown to us in Episode 8 of her Attunements. On October 24, they arrived in Milan for the MTV Europe Music Awards 2015 occurred on October 25, and on October 28, in Madrid instead, there was the interview with Alyson Eckmann, the journalist Camila flirted with while Lauren was sitting right next to her.

Going forward, in November we have:

- Rumors about Lauren and Julius Dein (his friend who is a YouTube magician).

-The release of IKWYDLS including the rumors about Camila and Shawn and Michael Clifford (who was already in the picture) who were ‘vying for her’.

- Beginning of Lauren’s coming out plan which included: 1) The release of The Vamps’ album on November 23rd, that is, a week after the release of IKWYDLS, and which included the track ‘I Found A Girl’. Joe O'Neill, the manager of The Vamps, liked that famous tweet. Despite the efforts to make us believe that Bleahren (sorry for the Italian pun I made here, but ‘bleah’ in Italian is equivalent to the ‘eww’ to indicate something gross, and therefore Bleah-Ren) Brauren was real and that the girl involved was Lucille and not Camila, they’ve miscalculated since Lauren and Brad ‘dated’ in 2014 when Lucy had not yet returned into Lauren’s life. But since the album and consequently the song came out on November 23, 2015, they tried to manipulate people’s minds as usual. 2) Jill’s article that served to connect and more or less ‘confirm’ the story between this Jordan and her childhood friend, Lauren-Lucy.

- December: completion of the 7/27 album + Dina LaPolt’s entry + renegotiation of the contracts (mostly DNA’s contracts) + FIFTH HARMONY MUSIC, INC. created by LAND on December 21 to prepare for the transfer of the 5H trademark, the FIFTH HARMONY PARTNERSHIP, of which they became owners from April 27, 2016 + change of management from Faculty Management: Jared Paul and Janelle Lopez, to Maverick Management: Larry Rudolph, Dan Dymtrow, and Tara Beikae. [All things that were possible ONLY THANKS to the exit of C from the group]

- January 2016, we have Lauren and Lucrezia who came back from Colombia to then taking a road trip for Lucy’s birthday week.

- Jill’s article came out and coincidentally, by pure chance, exactly two days later, on January 27, 2016, Camila and Dinah were hacked.

- On March 9, 2016, Lauren, Normani, Andrea, Dinah, and Keana went to pierce their ears, or rather, Laurmainah pierced their ears, mama Dre and Keana just accompanied them. During her turn, Lauren asked Keana to take her phone to make a video. In the meantime, Mani was filming Lauren, and again by pure chance, Keana, who was in the heart of the frame, took Lauren’s phone as she’d asked, and both the lock screen and the home screen portrayed a picture of Lucania during a photoshoot. Same picture Lucy herself posted on Instagram on April 10th to leave no doubt.

- April 24, 2016, Coachella together.

- Luciana went with 5H in London, in May, during the promotion of the 7/27 album. (+ Camren video of May 28, 2016)

- She was present during the start of the tour in South America on June 26th (in the evening during the concert, L danced Big Bad Wolf for her, but that’s not the famous video, that was on September 5) and 27th to celebrate L’s birthday together (picture of the 27th of them in Buenos Aires).

- June 27, 2016, on L’s birthday, Jill posted a picture with L from the birthday dinner of the year before, further confirming the story of ‘Jordan’.

- August 1, the national girlfriend day, L posted a picture of her and Lucy.

- From August 12 to 21, Lucy was with them. The night after the concert on the 13th in Rochester Hills, Michigan, videos in which Lucilla appeared during Lauren Fuller’s birthday celebration at the hotel for dinner. On the 14th in Noblesville, Indiana, during Gonna Get Better and Big Bad Wolf Lauren smiled in Lucy’s direction who was in the audience. On the 18th in Virginia Beach, Virginia, a fan met Laucy in a movie theater restroom, taking a selfie with Lauren (C posted a picture of her in the dark with the words of Bad Things “don’t think that I can explain it” the same night).

- On September 4 and 5 Lucippe returned. On the 5th in Houston, Texas, the famous ‘super HD’ video took place in which Lauren danced Big Bad Wolf for Lucy, even pointing to her during her verse. [On September 6, Midland, Texas, during the Q&A, Lauren wore the same dress that Lucy was wearing to the concert the night before, and at the same time, she sat next to C and got jealous when C complimented a fan by sending her flying kisses. Ahh… The irony]

Now. Let’s move on to the part of the podcast where Lauren explains about the kiss with Lucza at her uncle and aunt’s wedding, how her aunt “super innocently” posted the pictures on Facebook that her “unreal invasive fans” found and posted, how Perez Hilton outed her to the world by posting an article with those pictures, how she did nothing for a week, and that after thinking “Ok, it happened. People know. What am I gonna do?”, she wrote that letter against Trump as her own way of coming out.

On November 4, 2016, Lauren and Lucynda did the ‘famous’ photoshoot in New Orleans called ‘Bare With Me’. Lauren flew to NOLA right after Halloween, got back to Miami to vote, then returned to New Orleans on the 10th along with her family for the wedding. Lucianna was also with her on the 10th for the rehearsal/bowling with all of Lauren’s relatives. Meanwhile Orange Trumpeter was elected on the 8th, and many celebrities were preparing to write a letter through Billboard against him and his supporters. Labels and management saw it as a perfect opportunity to get her to come out also considering how much Lauren has always been vocal on the subject, and THEY contacted Billboard to get her to participate in exchange of the exclusive of her coming out. All that was missing was the evidence to make sure that there had been no connection with Camila, and that was the reason for the kiss at the wedding on the 11th.

On November 13, the wedding photographer posted those pictures on his website, including the one of the kiss. And I’m sorry, Lolo, I love you but, really? Who are you kidding? The pictures didn’t start spreading because her ‘unreal invasive fans’ found them on her aunt’s Facebook page where she’d posted them ‘super innocently’. The pictures started spreading after the photographer posted them! And you know what’s even more funny? That to see those pictures on the website, you needed an access password. So what are you saying here, Lo? That your ‘unreal invasive fans’ were so good, to even have hacked their way into the website for pictures they didn’t even know existed? It wasn’t your team, was it? Oh, okay. My bad.

Sarcasm aside. The pictures started to spread, Perez tweeted about it on the 14th, and in the meantime Lauren had time to write the letter that was approved by the labels and sent to Billboard (on the 14th), who approved it a couple of days after it was sent (on the 16th), and which they then published it in the article two days later (on the 18th). In all of this, on November 15, 2016, the girls all went to Epic’s party. Since we know very well that most of the cases of coming out as bisexual in the industry made by a female celebrity occur in succession with the connection with a guy, that night there was the PR proposal between Typo Dolour Signal and Lauren that he obviously accepted, and in fact, he was there that night at that party too (Picture of C with a tear mark on her cheek).

Now, the icing on the cake of the Laucy’s PR: Nicole Cartolano. Nicole is a friend of Lecy’s with whom she had already worked together and who also posted pictures of Lauren on November 17 and 22, 2016, one on December 31, 2016, together with Marian Hill taken backstage after Lauren’s performance with them on the 30th, the night before, for the Snow Globe Festival in South Lake Tahoe, California, and the one of Laucy (with the piñata) on January 10, taken the same night to celebrate Lucilia’s birthday at midnight and that Lauren also used to post it for wish her a happy birthday. That was the last public interaction between the two. *Slow entry of Tympans Dollhouse Signalized in the picture from January 4, 2017, thanks to that tweet*.

On January 21, 2017, Lauren and Lucy were at the same Women’s March, but separately (single), and we haven’t seen them together anymore. LuBYE. On March 22, 2017, both ‘Bare With Me’ and the interview article Nicole did with MTV News (she confirmed that Laucy had been together by having an on-again, off-again for years and also said a lot of other bullshit like the fact that the girls were nervous because they didn’t know how their parents would’ve responded) came out. On August 13, 2018, Nicole officially apologized to Lucy for being angry with her for posting the pictures and therefore for having outed her and for having taken part in the MTV interview without their permission. There was also the screenplay made by Nicole’s mom to make everything even more true.

Bullshit on bullshit on bullshit. Number 1, Lauren herself confirmed in this podcast that her parents knew about her, and said how much she loved Lucre’s ‘I’m out and proud’ part.

Number 2, Nicole posted a preview of the pictures on March 18, 2017, so if she really wanted to stop her before the publication on the 22nd, she would’ve had time to do so.

Number 3, Lucita came out publicly on her own with that Spanish post on Instagram on November 20, 2016, saying in summary that she was anything but straight because she didn’t want to label herself (she did it years later by saying she was a lesbian).

Number 4, as Lusia also confirmed in that post where Nicole’s mom left that comment, Nicole signed a non-disclosure agreement form. If she had actually violated it without having had a release and written consent form, she would’ve been sued.

Number 5, if Luciferase really wanted to have that conversation in private with Nicole’s mom, she might very well have done so. She could’ve contacted her and answered her IN PRIVATE for real, and not via IG where EVERYONE saw and took the side of poor, poor Luckless.

Number 6, the biggest proof that shows the hypocrisy of all this, Lucasta continued to work with Nicole. Their last work dates back to November 25, 2019.

Okaay, sure… sure, because it was normal for her to continue working with the person who outed her, wasn’t it? People’s lies never cease to amaze me. For that matter, Nicole also posted a picture of their ‘adventure’ as they made their way to the photoshoot location on November 1, 2017, and continued to wish them both a happy birthday with posts every year.

And lastly, on June 6, 2020, we have the Lucerne’s video leaked (+ old pictures and videos of 5H) where she burned pictures of Lauren and of the two of them together in 2017, accompanied by the tweets occurred two days later, in which she explained that she was hacked and that she burned the pictures for a closure. Then, exactly 20 days later, that is on June 26, 2020, the PAPER Magazine article of Lauren’s interview came out. What a coincidence! In that article, Lauren explained, along with other things, that she’d been in love with her best friend for 7 years.

Lauren, honey, the maths, the maths… If according to your words you fell in love with her at 15, got together with her at 18, and broken up at 20, how can these be 7 years? It’s 5 years… And as if it wasn’t enough, still according to your words, after 1 year and 8 months (from mid-May 2015 to mid-January 2017), 2 months of which public because of the wedding pictures, of the relationship you wanted at all costs, “all in” and “now we’re gonna be in this relationship”, you broke up with her because she was really toxic, and after less than a month, you started dating an even more toxic person without the proper time to heal?? How do you expect me to believe you? And I’m putting aside the fact that I know they’re both PR relationships. I’m speaking out of logic. How? How can I believe you? How does this make any sense?

Personally, yes, I believe Lauren and Lucy have a past. Lauren’s first kiss was when she was 13 (8th grade) with her boyfriend at the time, Dominic, but I think Lucy was her first kiss with a girl. And I think it happened when she was 15, but in 2011, so long before Lucy left. Lauren dated Paul Martinez from June 4, 2011, to the end of July (around 23/24). From after Paul, until her very first PR at X-Factor, Keaton Stromberg, she was single. I truly believe that before she met Camila, Lauren and Lucy did everything Lauren said. I really believe Lauren experimented with her in secret, but I don’t believe in anything else she said at all.

This is my opinion. And in my opinion, Lauren always knew she was queer, and Lucy was the first with whom she could experience the attraction and the feelings towards girls she had always felt and concealed deep inside herself. But they were friends. Just friends. Friends who messed around and experimented together in secret given the environment that surrounded them. Lucy then returned to live in Puerto Rico and they simply drifted apart because of the distance and Lauren’s busy schedule with 5H. When she came back into Lauren’s life, they rekindled their friendship. Just that. Also because, Camila, hello? Camila entered Lauren’s heart the same year Lucy left and never get out of it. Not to mention that Lucy had a girlfriend, Sarah Scott Narcise, before getting together with Nicole Marie Rendón in March 2017. I honestly think that Lucy was also giving advice to Lauren about her relationship with Camila, and I also think that now they really aren’t friends anymore for something we don’t know about, even though I have my theories… But anyway. Lauren needed a beard to be able to come out, Lucy needed visibility for her modeling career and, at the time, also for her music which, however, never saw the light of day. The labels approved because they would’ve done anything to keep their chosen one out of the gay light. Camila also approved. Boom, PR.

I don’t believe all the other bullshit she said during the podcast. Because if they’d been true, they would’ve made logical sense. A sense they’ve been trying, and failing, to give for years. If Lauren really didn’t want to come out, she wouldn’t have done a photoshoot with Lucy a week before the wedding with the intention of using that same photoshoot to come out. She would not have kissed Lucy in a public place during the wedding pictures in front of a professional photographer hired for the event, knowing full well that those pictures would eventually have been published by the bride and groom, her aunt and uncle, and the photographer himself. If she wanted so badly a picture of her kissing her girlfriend, drunk or not, she would’ve taken her fucking phone and take selfies. It wasn’t the fans’ or Perez’s fault. It was the management that was following the plan.

And I’m supposed to, what exactly? Forget all these things, things that have been proofed multiple times in the past, because Lauren, or Camila, or management, or labels, or their contracts, must continue with their stupid narrative? Because Camila must continue to look straight and continue to look in love with Shalt Menstruated because the señorito is about to release his documentary and his album? Because Camila’s movie is about to come out? Because Lauren’s own album is about to be released and because the subject matter of her female-pronounced songs must only and exclusively be related to Lucy? (Although I think her album will be out next year. I think a song with female pronunciation is coming out soon. And no, I’m sorry, I don’t think it’s Burning)

Guys, come on…

Think about it. She used Lucy as a shield to tell part of her story with Camila that happened in 2014. It all fits. Even the story told through songs from Camila’s cocky POV, including ‘Like Friends Do’, ‘Eyes on You’, ‘Cleopatra’, ‘Leave for Good’, and a couple from her last album like ‘Should’ve Said It’ and ‘Feel It Twice’.

I understand why many of you have been hurt by this podcast and by Lauren herself. I understand why a lot of you are angry about the things she said. I see you, I understand, I really do. And everyone is free to feel whatever they want, I’m not saying otherwise. But I really don’t understand why you’re hiding or why you’re abandoning the ship. Authors who don’t wanna write anymore. Accounts closed. Names changed. Hope lost. This, all this, makes me angry and hurt. Because you fell for it. And you know why you fell for it? Because Lauren changed her approach. Leaving aside the part just before when she said: “Even when I talk about it, and I don’t talk about it because I’ve learned to just ignore it because-” and there, I swear I had to pause because I burst out laughing, and I was like: “Bitch, you’re the one who pulled this out of your ass out of nowhere right this second, what are you saying?”. She went on by saying, and she knows us so well because of this: “I just chose to ignore it at a certain point because getting angry to them would it mean that it was real and validate it more for them”.

And it’s true. This non-angry approach of hers, worked like a charm. Lauren’s older, she’s more mature than before. Although she was very nervous, she managed to explain everything calmly. The fact that she was emotional and almost cried in many parts, it really gave an extra boost to what she tried to sell. And I’m not saying she faked almost crying. Hell, no. That was super true and hard for her. I’m saying though, that it’s really easy to manipulate people’s minds, and Lauren used her real pain, the real suffering she has gone through over the years to tell this charade. That’s why it seemed so real. And I’m supposed to fall for that shit just because that’s what they’ve wanted for years, right? Convenient much?

Guys, please. You’re smarter than that, use those beautiful brains. For example, the fact that Lauren said: “I was queer, but she was not”, wrong as you want it to be, and “Camila and I were just really good friends at that time”, yeah, sure, Jan. Doesn’t the very fact that she used the past tense make you realize that it was done to completely detach herself from her IN THE PRESENT? Everything she said was for something. Everything had a purpose. And the goal is always the same. Make us stop shipping ‘em. Putting a label on C only served the Shoestoremila purpose, nothing else. And those were words that came out of the mouth of the one who says she doesn’t like labeling people. The same one who was pissed that someone had outed her before she wanted to. Do you really think she’s that hypocritical?

The fact that she put all the CS in the same box, especially when she talked about the Daddy situation, WAS DONE ON PURPOSE. She couldn’t fail to generalize because their purpose is, and will be for a long time to come, to kill Camren. That means the whole fandom. Not just invasive elements. But really all the CS. The purpose was to make us feel guilty. The purpose is to make us accept that it was never real, and since we care about them, to make us continue to support them individually and not as a couple, even though she knows that the real CS do it regardless. This, is called manipulation, guys.

Think about everything else too. The inconsistency. The holes in her story. The lack of explanations. And the fact that during the story of how it all happened, she jumped from one theme to another and therefore managed to deflect and not completely finish one before moving on to the other, doesn’t it make you understand that she didn’t want to give too many details? And when does that usually happen? She knew we’d analyze her. She knew she couldn’t say too much. When she talked about Lucy, she knew that WE know she was talking about Camila, and with too many details, it would also have been obvious to the others because WE would’ve pointed it out to everyone. I mean, it’s obvious enough in itself, imagine if she’d fed us more information that we would’ve compared in the timeline.

Please, guys. I know that it feels like something’s changed, but it’s not. It’s really not. I’m appealing to all of you. Open your eyes. Reason. I know many of you still have conflicting emotions and feelings, and that’s okay. If you’re still upset, if you still wanna cry, then cry. Do whatever helps you feel better because, especially after the haters have come to bite your asses, you’re entitled to feel the way you do. But please, please, don’t give up. If you give up, you just play their game. You just do them a favor. You guys had invested so much of your time, so much of your passion, so much of yourselves to just, give up. Think of all we’ve been through, especially those who’ve been in the fandom for years. Think about how happy Camren makes you. They were there for you when you needed them. When you were going through hard times. I know they’ve helped a lotta people.

And think about this too. Lauren herself said at the beginning of the podcast: “The news and the media are constantly spinning narratives for your clicks so they can make money”. And what do you think this podcast was for? It’s always the same shit. Have you not noticed how the very same news and media have ALL talked about them? Didn’t you notice how My Oh My magically returned into the charts? How 50ft surpassed the 9 million streams on Spotify? And you still have doubts?

This is instead for the CS who get often angry about their actions. I personally think it’s pointless to blame Lauren and Camila for every single thing they do that has been PLANNED for them. Especially Camila as far as Shonas is concerned. There’s a pattern here too. Lauren had her light PR with Lucia. Lauren then had her heavy PR with Typic Dole Sight while Camila had a light one with Eatchu. And now Camila’s having a heavy one. C’s one is heavier simply because they’re much more famous than PRen (Tyren) were. So, guys, be patient. There’s really no point in getting angry and blaming them. It’s a waste of energy. It’s useless to blame them if they’re gonna continue to do so over the years to come. They’re just still trying to get past their original contracts and survive in the industry at the same time. Sooner or later, I HOPE, they will be free to tell the truth or the truth will come out on its own.

Well, I’m done. Jeez, that was long, wasn’t it? But I hope it was worth it. I hope I’ve cleared your heads a little bit and instilled some hope again. I also hope I made you smile with all those nicknames and my sarcasm. I especially hope that wherever you are, you’re having a good day, and if not, then I hope it has improved at least a little bit with this post. And thank you so much, Stuck. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to use my voice for the first time publicly/virtually. You, above all, keep on being one of the lights and NEVER let them turn you off. I love you guys. Stay safe. Stay strong. Stay patient. With love, F.

I leave you with these two pearls:

Number 1. Lauren said something else too. She said: “Don’t trust me. Go research. Go look this shit up yourself”. I know she said it for a completely different context, but I found it really funny given the situation.

Number 2. This is a small scene that automatically created itself in my head as soon as I finished listening to Wonder. I titled it: The sad and short story of the making of ‘Wonder’.

Enjoy:

*on the phone*

Shawl Mendicant: “Hey, buddy. I know you were a huge Fifth Harmony fan and I know you love my fake girlfriend, so I was thinking… could you help me? You know, I need her to stay relevant, but to do that, I also need to release music and completely take all the credit from other people because, you know, the most I do is change a sentence or two in my style to make people think that I wrote all my songs.”

Sam Smith: “………okay?”

Shawnita Menorrhagia: “So, I was wondering, can I copy your homework? You can totally refuse if you want to, but I’m hoping to appeal to the love you have for 5H and Camila, and maybe help a friend out?”

Sam Smith: “Yeah, sure, you can copy my homework. Anything for my girls. Just, change it up a bit so it doesn’t sound too obvious you just copied it.”

Shonas Mended: “Don’t worry. I’ve got this. Thanks, man.” - *ends the call*

Sam Smith looking at the phone with an incredulous expression and one hand over his heart: “I came out as a non-binary, you insensitive asshole!”

Shoes Mentionable from the other room: “Cameeela! He said yes!” *reaching then Camila and Lauren in the living room where Lauren is lying with her head resting on Camila’s legs who’s running her fingers through her hair with one hand and holding the book that she’s reading with the other one* “You were right, all I had to do was mention you girls.”

Lauren chuckling and continuing to pet Cleo who’s lying at the foot of the couch with one hand: “Told you”, to then adding: “And please, I know you’re excited because of the news but keep your voice down”, continuing to caress Sofi’s head who’s sleeping on top of her with the other one.

Shapeless Mentality: “Oh, sorry.”

Camila without looking away from her book: “Sam’s really nice. I’m sure they would’ve said yes even without the need of mentioning us.”

Lauren: “Hmm, I’m not so sure about that, babe. Yes, they’re very nice, but we’re powerful in their minds, so it was an added incentive for them to say yes.”

Shaved Mentholated: “Who are they? Weren’t we talking about Sam?”

Camila who was giggling at her girlfriend’s words:

Lauren:

Sinu from the kitchen:

Cleo who was nibbling her toy:

Even Thunder, Leo, and Eugene from outside into the yard:

*the end*

Chon Mendable: ‘Wonder’ - Sam Smith: ‘One Last Song’

____

OMG I am speechless. I’m really still digesting this whole story because it’s amazing but I wanted to start by saying hello to you and telling you my name, my name is Marite. It is a pleasure to meet you dear friend. I don’t want to write too much because your words are much more important than mine but I wanted to thank you for trusting me and my blog to tell me your story. That side of the story that, being new and not having been a harmonizer from the beginning, I never learned. I intended to ask for more information about Laucy’s Timeline but what you have told is a gem. A gem that shows that the bastards of the industry cannot fool the fans because we pay attention to everything and it is not easy for us to fall for their shit. I think the power we fans have is so great that if we all came together, we could bring down this whole fucking fake empire that they have created. That said, Laucy’s story is surprising. As planned and how each person involved had to do their part on the chessboard. Incredible. Now that you tell me that story, I think it fits the one I wrote in my once upon a time post. Sure, yours is true and has everything that mine doesn’t. I have tried to keep this blog open for all who wish to come and air their ideas, their thoughts, their tea. And you dear friend, you have been one of the best so far. You’ve given us that support that the fandom so badly needed and I really appreciate it. I also appreciate your humor, the nicknames have been so hilarious and I’m still laughing. Thank you for daring to tell this part of the story and reopen the can of worms of a PR that right now resurfaces with that Lauren interview. With a purpose, it’s true. And something tells me that we will see much more very soon. Thank you for your support, my friend. And you know, you have my blog at your disposal for whatever you need. And if you need to talk or anything else. I greatly appreciate that we can continue to keep this ship afloat among ourselves. Among a group of intelligent people who have been hurt by someone we have always loved very much even though we know the reason for all that. We can’t give up now because if we do it like you say they will win and I personally don’t plan to indulge them in that. Thank you very much for all dear friend and I hope you have a nice day. I send you a hug and I hope you stay safe.

#submission #laucy timeline #amazing #thanks you buddy #camren #f anon

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amythecinnabunny · 4 years ago

Note

Space AU and Time Travel for Juke 👀 <33

Holy shit holy shit holy shit ok ok ok ok first of all AKDBJSJSJJEJE YES

Okay okay so let me try to iron out the mess in my head skxbjsjjd I hereby apologize if things get out of order or whatever but I am literally vibrating with excitement someone please write this I'll love you forever

Ok so I'm thinking also an aged up au for ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* reasons *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ sjsnnsn

Also, I've done this before and I'm gonna do it again, but Bobby and Trevor are two different people for the sake of the timeline here.

Time frame for this would be WAY into the future. Humanity has gone galactic. We also had our asses handed to us by several alien planets but we probably deserved it. Anyway, after we got rid of Elon Musk, we eventually made peace with the aliens and now roam the galaxy freely. 20-30yo generally try to get into a different fleet, just to learn about other races. Think all those alien ships adopts a human posts.

Julie, Carrie and Flynn are my three girl geniuses. They're like,,, the smartest people in every room. They've been like this since freshman year of college. Julie, Carrie and Flynn also all want to get into the student exchange program, which is exactly what you think it is. Alien races (and this now includes humanity) swaps out older students with each other so they get a feel of what the other race is like. It's fun, educational, and! You get to make super long distance pen pals!

I'd also have so much fun making up new memes???? It would be so fucking stupid tho but I love it.

Anyway, so after a few years of jumping through the exchange programme, hoping from planet to planet, unfortunately, without their bestfriends :<, the three of them qualify to board research ships!!!

So at like 23-25, my girls come back together on the same ship!! Its a massive thing and so they've hired so many interns from so many different races. It's like a landing hub for several smaller ships. They have like 10 interns per species and that's only because there are laws against having too many of one kind after they put 50 humans on a space station and the humans tried to take over. Also, humans multiply faster than the others. This terrifies some races.

Anyway, the ship's really just a bunch of college kids from different planets trying to avoid exam season by submitting research papers from their ship. They all bond over deadlines, breakups and coffee (or the alien equivalent thereof)

Flynn dated an alien girl for a while. They were cute. Flynn: as a lesbian, it's my duty to date all the women in space

This is also where they run into Willie!!! Yay, Willie!!!

Nick Danforth-Evans and Kayla Evans-McKessie are around ... somewhere ... in bunk beds like the little toddlers they wish they were, crying about the 15 page essay on why Xjsbsjdjd is a very intelligent race that we could learn a lot from (yes, that is a keysmash I'm too buzzed to be creating alien species names sjdjjdjd)

Carrie and Nick do date for a while but then Carrie hooked up with Kayla. Bisexual queen who?

Julie met Willie that time she didn't sleep for over 48 hours because she had a research paper due within a week and she hadn't started yet and it was 10 000 words on her experiences with the Psjxjjdkeiwj race. Luckily for her, the kid she bumped into and spilled an energy drink all over had the same paper and helped her finish it. Willie sometimes goes by the nickname Lifesaver, thanks to Julie. This confuses the metaphor-less people because Willie's never saved anyone's life?? So why is he a lifesaver??

ANYWAY ON TO THE TIME TRAVEL BIT

On their own, Julie, Carrie and Flynn are professional smart people who know what they're saying and are clever enough not to do things with too many risks. In the same room, however, they turn into dumb geniuses who can and possibly may blow up the entire ship. It's a good thing they have Willie, Nick and Kayla to babysit them, right? WRONG. Willie Kayla and Nick egg them on.

They decide there going to gather all the information there is on time travel and they're going to decipher it and make it work! Yay!

When they find stuff in alien languages they start calling up their alien pen pals "hello what's this word mean in this context? What, haha oh no, it's a research paper on why time travel projects were abandoned before completion. Okay, thank you!"

Before long, they have a working time machine. I mean,, they hope so. And so they enter a random date from the past and prepare to pop their heads through just to see what the world looked like approximately 200ish years ago

2020s, post covid because that exists for joke reasons later, Sunset Curve is performing live for one of their biggest audiences yet when mid-song, the floor just opens them up and swallows them whole before vanishing. The crowd things it's a stunt but Sunset Curve's managers are flipping their shit

Back on the ship, the machine starts sparking and with a soft boom and a hiss, the power in that quadrant goes out -- not before Willie's is pelted in the face with a pair of drumsticks and then a whole person.

It's a miracle the drums survived the trip, pet alone everything else.

So now these sleep deprived geniuses and co. have to hide three people and several musical artifacts, plus the smoking remains of a time machine, from their Supervising Officer, who is regrettably, a human too.

And none of them are very good at lying.

Luke and Bobby are though, and after piecing together bits and pieces from the frenzied rambling around them, Luke and Bobby save the group.

Shenanigans ensue as they try to rebuild the time machine under the watchful eye of the SO, while trying to mantainbfake credentials for the boys and trying to explain their very dated clothing. (Yes, Sunset Curve STILL rocks the 90s vibe. In the 2020s. It's their thing.)

Willex happens in the background -- and I mean that very literally. (Jukebox having a tension moment, Willex making out in the background.)

Honestly I'm not sure yet how theyd solve the problems, whether they'd send the boys back or not or what, but I do know that they will all cause a BUNCH of problems in between.

Sometimes they play music just because they still can. Sunset Curve becomes a house band for the ship. They get broadcasted to neighbouring or passing ships like "hey, losers, we have live music, SUCK IT!"

Focusing on the jukebox aspect of this whole fic, that's gonna be a fucking hilarious slow burn.

It will definitely contain the lines "Oh my god, I have a crush on Julie." "Congratulations, you're officially the last to know." "What? Even [SO's Name] knows??" "Dude. The ship's navigation crew knows." "Does ... Julie know?" "No, you're both morons."

Julie is having the exact same conversation four hallways away.

They'd talk a lot about sending the boys back home and it'd be really quiet conversations when everyone else is asleep.

Julie and Luke write music together and after a while, Julie performs a few of them too. Thanks to the concerts, they meet the other human interns that were on the other end of the ship and Carrie and Kayla form Dirty Candy.

The ship becomes known as the party bus.

A thing that will happen: Luke helps Julie write one of her history papers that she gets an A+ for and a comment about how dedicated she was to have delved so far back in the history records to get authentic insight.

Julie and Luke speak in memes but they don't speak the same memes and it drives them both up the wall.

Luke says yeet one day and Julie's soul leaves her body because she hasn't heard anyone say yeet since she was a toddler back on Earth.

Julie: odd display, but acceptable.

Luke, physically experiencing a record scratch: what the fuck did you just say

That is all I have to offer because I'm afraid of plotting further and causing angst somehow.

oh one more thing, someone gets to bang an alien and it's probably Flynn.

Oh oh oh another one more thing. Reggie says "this is just like in Star Wars" for literally anything. The band goes along with it for shits and giggles. The rest of them are very interested in this ancient tale called Star Wars. Reggie sees a picture of Flynn and her green gf and says "hey, you dated photoshopped Yoda" and Bobby just loses his shit.

#julie and the phantoms #jatp #julie and the himbos #julie and the fat ones #jatp fic idea #ask #ask meme #thanks for the ask!#trope mashup ask #long post

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peachyaone · 4 years ago

Text

Lonely Heart pt.4

Warning: Mentions of alcohol.

Iris arrived at the airport along with Ashley. Iris rubbed her eyes and stretched. She lets out a groan, sleeping on an airplane seat wasn’t exactly comfortable. Iris's bandmates, Helena, Maia and Julia was making small talks with each other so they can keep up with what's going on. As they waited for their luggage, Iris went to checked on her phone.

10 texts messages from Lemon Boy 2 missed calls from Boatboi and Mikey 1 voicemails from Si<3 20 texts messages from Lukey<3

She listened to Sierra’s voicemail.

"Hey, angel." Sierra said on the voice mail. "I know I'm the last person you want to hear from right now after what happened, and I just want to say that we're both sorry." Sierra said. "I'm sorry I didn't take your side, sorry that I didn't understand from your point of view. I'm sorry for giving up so easily, but I understand if you don't forgive me but at least forgive Luke." she took in a breath. " He’s been beating himself up. And he barely slept. We went to Ashton's and he explained everything to us. We were so foolish for not give you a chance to explain. We're sorry."

Julia, who’s the bassist of her band, turned around to see Iris with tears in her eyes. "Hey, Iris?" she called out. Iris's head shot up, she cleared her throat and wiped away her tears. "Yeah?" she said. " We got your luggage, ready to leave?" Julia said. Iris nodded. "Wanna borrow my sunglasses? It can help cover up... only if you want to." she offered. "Thank you." she said quietly. Iris took the sunglasses. "No problem, bub." Julia beamed, patted Iris in the head. "Now come on, let’s head to the hotel, but let's go greet some fans, first." Helena said. Well, when Helena said "some fans" she meant crowds of people waiting to meet them.

"OH MY GOD! THEY'RE HERE!" "Hey Iris, can I get a picture?' "I LOVE YOU, IRIS" "WE LOVE YOU"

Iris smiled and took a few pictures with them. "uh..I-Iris?" She heard a small voice muttered out. She turned to see a girl with brown skin and long black hair."Hey sweetie, what's wrong?" she asked. "I-I made you something!" she said as she handed her a bag. Iris took the bag, in it was a painting of Luke, Sierra and her, and other stuff. Her heart ached. She forced a smile, "Oh my god, did you paint this? It's so beautiful!" The girl blushed profusely and nodded. Iris hugged the girl. "Thank you, sweetie. What's your name?" The girl smiled. "Nia, it's Nia." she said. "Well, Nia, thank you again for this beautiful painting! Are you coming to the shows?" Iris asked. "Y-Yeah I'm going to the one tomorrow." Iris hugged her again. "Can't wait to see you tomorrow then!" She smiled and waved goodbye. Helena, after overheard her conversation with Julia earlier, stayed awhile to wait for Iris. “You okay, shortcake?” she asked. Usually, Iris would protest when Helena called her “shortcake”. But she didn’t this time.

*timeskip*

As they reached the hotel, it was midnight. They got their keycard, and told each other goodnight. She unpacked her stuff, placed her guitar and her gift beside the vanity. She took a warm shower, the water cascading down her back, relieving her tense muscles. She dried off and changed into her boy-boxers and oversized hoodie she stole from Luke. She forgotten that she put that in. The smell of cashmere and him filled her senses and she felt her mood dampened.

She unlocked her phone and opened Instagram. She saw that Luke had posted. The caption said:

For Buttercup xoxo.

He was holding his guitar, as he played a rhythm the she recognized, but she couldn’t remember the lyrics. She had heard them boys talking about this before, but never sung it. He looked so tired, she could see the circles underneath his eyes.

Your type of mind, so hard to find, Native of mine, you're just my kind, Down on my knees, I’ll always follow, I promise you until the end of time.

Her heart yearned to hold the man in her arms and forgive him for every wrong he had committed over the past few days. She knew he was hurting. She had avoided his messages because she was too blinded by her own betrayal and sadness to truly realize what her absence had done to the man.

Such a lonely heart, oh woah Such a lonely heart, oh woah If you can't find another reason to stay Then I know I'm gonna always have a lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely Heart, oh woah Heart

He looked physically in pain, yet his emotions was conveyed by the lyrics of the song. Tears fell from her own eyes as she witnessed the man she loved experience such heartache.

Your precious heart, can't watch it break So I close my eyes while you walk away Can I have a second chance? Can I have another dance? Can I start another life, with you? When I wake up in a haze, and I haven't slept in days You're a thousand miles away-

But then she remembered he had hurt her so deeply. But also, she could feel his apology through the verse itself. She knew he wasn't great with words so he'll depend on songs to express what he felt. It was too much. Iris looked away, the sharp pain in her heart gave a shock, her hand reaching up to grasp over her heart. She feels lightheaded. Her chest ached, a heaviness was pressing on her chest. Iris shaked her head, slowly reaching for keycard on her nightstand. Staggering, she stood and made her way to Helena's room. A sob escapes her, her weak attempts of keeping it in failed. "Helena-" she called out. "please...open the door." She curl herself into a ball, tears slipping down her face. She felt the door open. "Iris!" Helena exclaimed.

She open her eyes as Helena's arm wrapped around her, her hand rubbing soothing circles on her back. Maia heard the commotion outside and rushed outside. “What’s wrong?” She asked. She looked at the pair on the floor. “Hey Iris.” She cooed. “Hey. It’s okay. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I’ve got you, okay?” she said. “Iris. Iris, grab my hand.” She look at Helena, confused. "Just do it." She moved her gaze from her hands to Helena's, slowly taking it and holding it in her palm. “Squeeze.” She told her, Iris's eyes drifting up to meet hers. She smiled reassuringly. “Go on. Squeeze as hard as you can.” Iris's tightened her hands around Helena's palm, her eyes still on her face. "Keep going.” She nodded.

“Now match my breathing. In, out. In, out.” Maia whispered, her hand still rubbing circles on Iris’s back. Iris tried to concentrate on the way Maia’s chest, moving up and down, attempting to copy with her own breathing. There’s an overwhelming scent of Luke lingering on every breath she take. “Hey, hey, hey. Focus on me, Iris.” Helena said, snapping Iris out her thoughts, “That’s it. Well done sweetheart, you can do it.” Maia reasurred. They stayed like that for a while; Helena whispering reassurance, Iris’s matching Maia’s breathing. Finally, after what felt like forever, She stopped shaking and her heart rate slowed back down.

"You okay, now? Do you need anything? I could get you water, snacks, anything..?" Maia asked. "Just stay with me, please." She clinged to them ."Alright." She said. "Would you like to tell us what happened?" Helena asked. Iris told them about Luke and about Sierra's voicemail. "He looked so sad, did I mess everything up?" She whispered. "No, Iris. He snapped at you. He should've listened to your reasons before jumping into conclusions like that." Maia reassured. “Look, I want you to stay with me for a little bit, okay?” Iris began shaking her head, ready to pull out of her grasp. “Oh, ‘Lena, no, it’s okay, I ca—” “Iris, please,” Helena begged. “Just for tonight, yeah? You’re not in a right headspace for you to be alone right now.” Iris nibbled on her lip, sniffling and conflicted as she timidly asked, “Are you sure?” Helena nodded firmly. "Alright then." Iris whispered.

"Can you walk?" Maia asked. "I-I think s-so" She said, attempting to stand. The pair supported her back so she could stand. And helped Iris to back to Helena’s bed. "Sit tight, I'll grab some stuff from your room, okay?" Maia asked her. "Okay." Iris mumbled. "Just rest, do you want to postpone the concert tomorrow?" Helena softly asked. Iris rapidly shook her head. "No, no, no. I'll be fine, don't worry. i can do it." she rambled. "Alright, now go get proper sleep." Helena said.

*The next day*

Ashley went to check her phone. There was a text from Ashton.

[7:10 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: Hey Ashley

[7:10 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley: Hey Ashton, what's up?

[7:11 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: Nothing much

[7:11 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: I only wanted to know how is Iris, she doing okay?

Ashley looked at the woman on the bed, She went to check on her in the morning, to find she’s in Helena’s room. Iris was curled up in the covers, her eyes slightly puffy and her cheeks are flushed. But other than that, she sleeping so soundly.

[7:12 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley : She's okay. Helena told me had a breakdown last night but she okay now. She still sleeping though. She said she had pains in her chest, I’m worried.

[7:14 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: Oh god, I knew that something was wrong. Is there something I can do to help?

[7:14 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: Please tell me, I want to help.

[7:15 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley : I don’t know about that, Ashton. And you're in LA and we're halfway around the world. We went to check up on her, she was burning up.

[7:18 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley: i think she's getting sick.

[7:20 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: But I can fly out there, I can go see her

[7:20 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: I want to see Iris better, she’s like family to me.

Iris stirred, little whimpers could be heard from her. “No……please” she whimpered. Helena shushed her back to sleep. Ashley lightly felt Iris’s forehead for any signs of fever, and she was unusually warm.

[7:21 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley : Ashton, your band needs you more, you're working on your album. what would your management say, when they finds out that you’re flying out, just for her.

[7:23 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley : I can take care of her, Ashton. Trust me.

[7:24 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: The album can wait, we have a lot of time, and the boys, I’m sure that would understand. Fuck the management! I don’t give a damn. I want to know if she’s okay, I need to see her if she’s physically and mentally okay.

[7:27 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley: Fine, but wait, if she gets worse, you can come and also, don't come to me if Iris starts throwing hands. You know how she is, chaotic yet so kept-together.

[7:30 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos: I don’t mind if she tries to throw hands, you have no idea how many times she did. But I be glad to see her okay.

[7:30 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley: alright then. Look i have to go, duty calls y'know. See you later, Ashton. I’ll update you if anything happens.

[7:30 am, 11/10/2019] Ashton 5sos : Alright! Thank you, Ashley.

[7:33 am, 11/10/2019] Ashley: No problem.

Ashley placed down her phone, sighing. Iris stirred awake. “ Iris, you’re awake. You feeling better?” Helena said softly, stroking Iris's bed hair so it'll look a little bit neat. They heard a muffled "yes" from her. “Come on, now, we have an live session to go to” Ashley said. “Oh yeah.” she got up, stretched for a bit and yawned. “Go get ready, We’re leaving in few hours.” Ashley reminded. “Okay, see you then.” Then Iris went back to her room.

Her phone was still on the bed. She switched it on. What greeted her was hundreds of notifications from Twitter and Instagram. Fans tagged her in a news post.

“TROUBLE IN PARADISE? POLY TRIAD, LUKE HEMMINGS, IRIS ADLER AND SIERRA DEATON, DID THEY BROKE IT OFF? OR SOMETHING REALLY DIFFERENT?”

“Days after the pictures of the lead vocalist of The Temptresses, Iris Josephine Alder, who was assumed to be cheating on her partners, Luke Hemmings from 5 Seconds of Summer and Sierra Deaton, former singer from Alex & Sierra.”

“The lead vocalist of 5SOS posted a 2 minute clip of a new song for their upcoming album, CALM. Following it, was a caption that said, “For Buttercup xoxo.” Is the mysterious “Buttercup” , Iris herself? The rockstar was seen with singer, Halsey at the Heathrow Airport in London the day before for Halsey’s Manic world tour with Iris as the opener.”

Iris scrolled through the news, until one specific line she read struck her hard.

“The couple was seen walking out of Starbuck at Midtown, LA. They looked pretty happy, maybe they would much be better off without Iris-“

Better off without Iris.

Better off without her.

Iris threw her phone at the mattress, rushed to her bag and pulled a flask. She knew it was bad, and Ashton would give her a lecture about it. But she couldn’t resist. She drank. When she emptied the flask, she was buzzed. It wasn’t enough but it numbed her for a bit. She prepared herself, slick backed her mullet, put on light makeup and wore presentable clothes. She chewed on some mints, just to make sure. She was ready.

here's the outfit:

It slightly covered her neck tattoo, a reminder of them. She wanted to cover up or hide anything that reminded her of them. She couldn't handle the sight. She reminisced the passionate nights they had. The quiet mornings they shared, Iris loved those moments, when she was with them, everything felt right.

*Flashback*

It was December. Snow slowly fall from the sky, Sierra knows just how much Iris adores the snow. They both do. Luke enjoys the way he see the pure amazement light up in her eyes. They stared at her as Iris looked out into the world outside. It like giving a child the gift they always wanted on their birthday. Sierra was the first one to break, she slipped on Iris’s oversized cardigan. Her steps are quiet as she crosses the room to sit beside Iris. “Hey angel” she cooed, her palm caressed her face. Iris’s fluttered shut, her lips curled into soft smile. “Mornin’ Si “ she mumbled, face instinctively nuzzled into her palm.

Luke decides to join them, he put on his sweatpants, and stood behind Iris but his arms snaking around her waist , she shuddered at the coldness of his fingertips. “ You’re freezing, Lu.” She said. “Couldn’t help it, lovey. M’two girls left me to fend the coldness all by m’self” He said as he pouted. “Sorry, Lu” Iris said. She reached out to brush a stray curl behind his ear. “M’can properly see your pretty eyes now, Lu. It’s so blue, like the sea, very pretty.” She rambled. She turned to Sierra, “Your’s pretty too. It reminds me of nature. I wanna paint both of your eyes, but it wouldn’t be the same.” She rambled again. “And why’s that, angel?” Sierra asked, stroking her cheek with thumb. “I couldn’t get the colors just right. Yours, It’s like different shades of browns and blacks. And Luke’s different shades of blue.” She said. “I don’t have the talent to do it either. My skills….they’re mediocre.” She said, her concentration on the subject faltered. Her eyes was glued to the window, watching the snowflakes falling, some sticking to the glass and others falling to cover the ground below.

“Angel?” “Hm?” Her eyes still glued to the snow covered scenery outside. “Look at us, honey.” Luke he asked quietly. Iris looked at them. “Your art skills are extraordinary, don’t ever let yourself down like that.” Luke said. “That’s right, Lu” Sierra agreed. Iris sheepishly looked away. “Hey, don’t look away..” Sierra cooed. She hooked her finger under Iris’s chin and lifted it up . They both gave her a kiss on her cheek. “Wanna go outside and play with the snow?” Luke said. “Mhm, maybe later. It’s too early in the morning. Wanna spend this moment with m’favorite people.” She whispered. That morning was quiet and peaceful. She would give everything she had to experience it aga-

“Iris.”

*Flashback ends*

“Iris.”

Iris snapped awake from her daydream from the knocking outside her door. "Coming!" She said. Ashley, Helena, Julia and Maia was outside. "We've been calling you for minutes now, you okay?" Ashley asked concernedly. “We almost had to restrain Julia for breaking down the door.” Maia joked. "Just got lost in thought, that's all. Look I'm ready, I just have to grab my bag and guitar, then we'll be off." She rushed into room, shoved her phone into her bag and slunged her guitar over her shoulder.

"Let's go."

#5sos #lierra x oc #poly!lierra #poly!5sos #poly!sos #luke hemmings #sierra deaton #luke hemmings x oc #sierra deaton x oc #MY OCs #lonely heart

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irenadel · 4 years ago

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i wanna talk books so I made a meme

@doorsclosingslowly here’s the answers to your questions :)

6. If you read in more than one language, is there a difference between the experience of reading in your native language(s) and reading in other languages?

Virginia Woolf has a great quote in A Room of One’s Own where she says that women writers need to develop their own “sentence” and that this can only be developed through creating a tradition of female writing. She says that while reading male writers is pleasurable, it isn’t useful for the female writer, that she can’t learn from the way men write. Their “sentence” isn’t suitable for female writing. I’m.... unsure of how much I agree with her on this but I find the theory useful for describing how I approach literature in Spanish vs English.

Especially in terms of language, not so much in regards to narrative or worldbuilding or even themes, I find Spanish to be pleasurable but not useful. I very rarely find myself reading something in Spanish and thinking “ooooh, I wish I could do that! I want to steal that! How did they come up with this?” The “sentence” for writing in Spanish isn’t one I recognize or want to imitate... except maybe for VERY few exceptions like Carlos Fuentes and Borges. Whereas I can spend a lot of time reading English un-selfconsciously and then suddenly be struck by a turn of phrase that I must somehow or other make my own. That almost never happens to me when reading Spanish.

9. Fiction or non-fiction or both? In what ratio? Where do you draw the line between the two?

Oh god, this is embarassing. Erm... fiction to a fault. On 2020 and 2019 I did try to make a concerted effort to read more nonfiction, ESPECIALLY more popular science books. I still kind of childishly consider myself to not be “smart like that” and that science isn’t for me, because I don’t understand it. I used to think science fiction wasn’t for me, for similar reasons. When I do read nonfiction it tends to be history and literary criticism.

I’m finishing my degree on English literature and though I had a period of hating hard on literary criticism, I think it was mostly me rebelling against the French brand of it. I HAVE to admit I love reading new historicism, especially now that I’m working on my dissertation and I had to read a lot on Elizabethan and Jacobean theatre.

Hopefully 2021 will be the year I read a bit more science.

11. The worst book hangover you’ve ever had

Augh... I remember two in recent years. Let me see... in 2017 I finished the last book in the Realm of the Elderlings. I had read the first book in the series around maybe the mid 2000s. I devoured it in a single weekend, still hungry for more of the story. I did not have access to the rest of the trilogy for a couple of years after, but as soon as I got them I read them as fast as I could. I remember reading those books during class, pretending to pay attention to a lecture on Linguistics but actually fully engrossed in Robin Hobb’s world.

It’s a world that was with me for more than 10 years. Characters that I knew intimately from multiple re-readings for more than 10 years. My dissertationg is about the first trilogy for crying out loud! I hadn’t wanted to read the last trilogy and the last book on the trilogy because I didn’t want that connection to end. But finally I gave in...

It was a book hangover because I was reading late at night when I realized, halfway through the book, a character I loved deeply was probably going to die and I just HAD to know, I HAD to be sure. So I read through the night going from disbelief to anger, to grief, to grim acceptance. I wasn’t able to put down the book until 11 am the next day, by which point I was openly sobbing and would have thrown the book across the room except I think I was reading in my computer.

The second book hangover I remember was less because of sprinting through the book and more because of the circumstances. Last December I had decided to finish as many books I could in hopes of reaching my Good Reads goal (which I didn’’t) and I was going through His Dark Materials pretty quickly when on the 25th I got the news that my grandmother died. I wasn’t able to go see her at the hospital or at a funeral, or even go see my dad and uncles because she had died of covid-19 and the situation was still pretty dire in the city.

Then Philip Pullman decided to be an absolute asshole to me and the characters in his book arrived to the Land of the Dead. Being an atheist fantasy series and me having just recently come to terms with the fact that I’m not even agnostic... it was very tough to go through Pullman’s exploration of mortality and the importance of life on Earth. I agreed completely that materiality and the here-and-now far outweigh any contemplations of an afterlife... but my grandmother had died very suddenly.... she had still been a pretty strong old lady before she contracted covid... I had spoken to her a couple of days before and she was still strong enough to bitch about litter getting inside her room...

I finished The Amber Spyglass in a rush as well and somehow it got mixed with my mourning process and my anger at myself for having taken my grandmother’s life for granted... for not having cherished the materiality of her existence when I had the chance... I hadn’t finished writing my dissertation’s first draft yet and there were some heavy issues going on in my household.... I was exhausted from having to survive the year and I think I still am... and it all mixed up with the bittersweet ending of Pullman’s His Dark Materials and the inevitability of loss... all I remember from between the 25th and the 31st of December 2020 was exhaustedly reheating Christmas food, trying to write, and slogging through The Amber Spyglass... it feels like it was a week-long literary hangover...

14. The book that, in hindsight, really should have clued you in to the fact that you’re _________ (queer/in love/doomed to be an academic/etc)

So this is slightly NSFW but I should have known, and stopped being such a snob about it, that I had WAY MORE in common with the furries than I cared to admit given that my first impression of Smaug the Golden when reading The Hobbit at the tender age of 8 was “wow! he’s dreamy!” *facepalm *(also betraying a worrying tendency to crushing on irredeemable assholes and other miscellaneous villains...) I have accepted my status as a weird monsterfucker AND a weird alienfucker. Inhuman anatomy makes me hot, and I should have known it from DAY ONE!

23. The book you expected to hate, didn’t, and then got angry about not hating

The Hunger Games, which I’m STILL salty about and will probably remain salty about for the rest of my life.

I hateread it because a friend told me about how he hated it, given his bitter ex loved it and though I agree with all his criticisms and have a bunch of my own... I still cannot stop finding stupid Katniss profoundly likeable! CURSES! A pox upon your house Suzanne Collins! I still think your dystopia is a cowardly, white-lady-who-has-never-feared-state-violence dystopia, I still think your love triangle was absolutely unnecessary and I still think you tried to cop out of admitting you (and your character) like pretty dresses by making the pretty dresses compulsory. Be brave! Don’t give me this “I’m not like other girls” bullshit! Be brave! Make your violent spectacle reality show as a criticism of the USA’s consumerism and callousness a voluntary thing! Don’t wash your heroine’s hands clean of the sin of wanting fame and fortune and survival at all costs!

But... fuck... I... still like Katniss... I’m glad little girls in 2008 got a heroine who kicked ass, looked good and wasn’t a perfectly strong and powerful person all the time. I’m glad they got competence and vulnerability... Fuck my life...

31. Bonus question: rec me something!

This is hard... since I get the feeling we have very different tastes in reading material but... If you haven’t heard of the Vampire: The Masquerade roleplaying game (or even if you have) take a crack at the Baali Clanbook. Even if you don’t understand the game mechanics I think you’ll enjoy the history portion because it’s about a clan of devil-worshipping vampires who do their devil worshipping through implanting evil insects on people... and I suspect it might be up your alley...

#book meme #doorsclosingslowly

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messiisgodibeliveinhim · 4 years ago

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Just Another Rant

Okay, so why do NCTzens have a hate boner for Taeyong??? It's so f*cking weird, it doesn't make sense.

Taeyong has been under NCTzens' microscope since his debut. Everything he does is dissected and twisted into something its not. No other member of NCT or any group (except maybe Jennie from Blackpink) is treated this way by the group's fans. NCTzens want Taeyong to be the villain so bad, that they're willing to stoop as low as dehumanizing, body shaming and wishing d3ath on him. NCTzens dislike him, some even hate him and they're not very subtle about it.

Now, I'm not saying all NCTzens are TY antis. I have moots on Twitter who dont stan him, but are incredibly respectful towards him and acknowledge his talents and hardwork. If you're one of them, then this rant is not about you. But i will say this, if it isnt all NCTzens who anti Taeyong, it's most of them.

It started with Lines and Screentime distribution for NCT songs and mvs. Now, i agree that Taeyong used to get a little more lines and screentime than the others at first. But instead of calling out SM, most of you targeted Taeyong saying he deliberately stole the said lines and screentime from his members so that he'd get to shine more..... Really???

Next, when he was announced as a member of SuperM, NCTzens were clearly upset it wasn't Johhny or Jaehyun. Do you wanna know why??? No, they didnt talk about talent. Instead, they wanted Jaehyun/Johhny instead of Taeyong because SuperM is a group targeted at the western audience and Jn & Jh knew to speak English better than TY..... Okay.

And it keeps getting worse.

-NCTzens saying that TY goes into the recording studio to record his solo songs, by LOCKING OUT the rest of NCT, so that they wont get to record their solo stuff.

-That TY is SM's Golden Boy cuz he 'gETs a LoT of SoLO pRoMos anD cENter TiMe', completely refusing to understand what 'SOLO PROMO' means or see how overworked and mistreated he is by his own company.

-When TyongFs praise TY about anything, NCTzens always, ALWAYS insert their faves in the post. Like, go make your own post maybe???

/Trigger Content

-NCTzens saying that TY dances like he has a sq*irrel in his pants, raps like d*g, looks like a skeleton etc etc. And these are just mild stuff i mentioned here. NCTzens are so much worse when it comes to body shaming and dehumanizing him. And when we call them out for it, thay have the audacity to say that its a JOKE and we're STUPID for not having 'A Sense of Humor'....

/End of Trigger Content

-NCTzens saying that TY's main dancer/main rapper/main visual/leader/center positions should go to their faves cuz their fave 'iS So mUcH beTTeR aT TheSe pOsiTIOns'. Yeah.... sure..... NCTzens rarely talk about the positions other members have , but are really obsessed with Taeyong's.

-NCTzens still denying that Taeyong is NCT's leader and that he's really good at it. Just yesterday, a Wayzennie (also a TY anti) started spewing sh*t about Taeyong's leadership. And their arguement??? That they have 'lEAdeRsHiP eXpEriEncE iN UnI, WoRk aND ouTsIDe wOrK' and that makes them an expert about leading a 23 member global kpop group, who had a rough start what with their controversial 'unlimited' concept and experimental songs. Sure, Jan.

(Also, the thing where some Wayzennies are still not accepting that TY is the leader of whole of NCT, cuz Kun is WayV's leader..... Seriously, though its not that hard to understand. Kun IS and WILL remain the leader of WayV, a 7 member group. That's a fact. But when the subunits (127, Dream and WayV) come together for projects (ex: NCT 2018 and NCT 2020), Taeyong becomes the overall leader. But since these Wayzennies are still on their WayV not being part of NCT agenda, they're simply ignore this. Go figure.)

- Oh, but when some other member in NCT messes up, it suddenly becomes Taeyong's responsibility cuz 'HE'S THE LEADER'. Funny, how NCTzens change narratives quickly. Also, weird how, according to NCTzens, NCT members suddenly can't think for themselves even though they're grown adults and need Taeyong to take the blame for them. Haha.....

-Also, NCTzens guilt tripping TyongFs from canceling NCT Beyond Live tickets when they got to know that he was injured and wont be participating in the concert a little too late, cuz "Taeyong, as a leader, would be sooo upseeet that his group wont be getting TyongFs' money and he'd feel sooo guiltyyy that y'all are getting refunds of your OWN money that YOU CHOSE to spent and its not my business at all. But damn, y'all are sooo selfish!!!!"

-NCTzens posting about how overjoyed they are that TY is injured cuz that means their faves get to shine..... "Look how MY FAVE killed TY's part" "MY FAVE ate Taeyong up" "Should've put MY FAVE in the OG line up instead of Taeyong" "MY FAVE made TY's part as his own" "Thank god, MY FAVE got to show off his talents, now that Taeyong isnt here". God, if i were one of the Neos whose fans say sh*t like this, it would've felt like a slap to my face. Honestly, tell me, do y'all really think so low of your faves? Do you really think they cant shine even with TY being on stage? They absolutely can, but you're focus is not on them, is it? Way to embarrass yourself.

-NCTzens blaming Taeyong for NCT's slow rise to fame because of the false rumors/allegations pinned on him by nasty people. They say Taeyong was the sole reason for NCT not being liked by many, not because of their confusing/complicated concept or the music. Yeah, you heard me. NCTzens are not above victim blaming and pointing fingers, cuz they are not ready to accept the fact that Taeyong was the one who carried the group on his back all the way.

-And how they can't stand the fact that TY gets praised by proffesionals or non-fans or locals. A dance analyzer analyzed 127's Kick It and at the end stated that Taeyong was the best dancer in 127. And what did NCTzens do. They bullied the analyzer to the point that they deleted the video, just cuz their fave was not named the best. A reactor reacts to Taeyong's Long Flight and the comments on the videos are along the lines of 'Hey, MY FAVE'S also has a solo song too. You should definitely react to that' or when they're tryna be subtle (but not really), they go 'Taeyong is soo good but you should also check out MY FAVE'S blah blah blah'

Hell, even when TyongFs say 'Taeyong is very so creative, by coming up with BDLI Jungle Gym concept and the MAW chandelier thing. He's literally an Idea Bank', and NCTzens go 'All the Neos are idea banks' in the same post.

When TyongFs say 'Taeyong is the really so handsome. NCT's main visual', they go 'All the Neos are main visuals'

Lmao, just 3 days ago, someone commented 'Taeyong is cute' under a tiktok video and an NCTzen just couldn't help but fume about it and went 'All Neos are cute'🙄

Like seriously, this is sooo annoying. Make your own goddamn post about the rest of NCT, ffs! Why do you to insert anyone else in a Taeyong tweet? Literally, can't let Taeyong have a moment for himself.

-Recently, Taeyong released 2 solo demo tracks on SoundCloud- Dark Clouds and Dark Clouds Remix (check it out here: https://soundcloud.com/eh_ovo_taeyong). And NCTzens being NCTzens started those who never even promoted Kun's SoundCloud before started promoting it under every TY tweet on the same day. Now, i don't have a problem with them promoting Kun's SC. But they could've done it any other day or made their own tweet about it. But doing it under every TY promo tweet and on the very same day? Really??? And some of them had the audacity to say that TY was getting free clout from Kun cuz Kun followed him on SC.....😑😑😑

-NCTzens have this weird belief that TY is getting solo promos and is being pushed by SM. What on earth are they talking about? Taeyong being center, main rapper and main dancer of the group is not solo promo. Him being in SuperM is not solo promo. Him opening Instagram and SoundCloud is not solo promo, but self promo- which means HE'S promoting himself, not SM. Solo promo is usually provided to the artist by the company in the form of photoshoots, accepting brand deals, releasing the artist's solo music etc and SM isnt doing sh*t for Taeyong. All they're doing is overworking him and milking him for money. That's it. And i want NCTzens to understand that.

And the list goes on and on and on. This weird hate boner NCTzens have for Taeyong is so bizarre to me. All Taeyong does is sing, rap, dance, talk cutely, take care of his fishes and play games with Baekhyun. And this somehow gets NCTzens mad. They constantly discredit him, try to make him seem less than what he actually is, insert everyone else when someone is talking just about him, make him seem like a villain by twisting his words or actions and making it into a big deal.... *sigh* Its so unbelievable how low NCTzens can stoop. And it gets tiring real quick.

N E Ways, this is everything i wanted to rant about and damn, this turned out to be too lengthy. Now, if you havent followed Taeyong on his Instagram, please do @eh_evo_nct. Stream Long Flight, his one and only solo station. And please look forward to BaekhyunxTaeyong collab on Taeyong's SoundCloud.

Ciao!

#lee taeyong #taeyong #nct 127 #nct

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kailedger · 4 years ago

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for all the YOI fanfic author, p.2

Oh wow, let me tell you, I really didn't expect the previous post on Russian culture to blow up ahaha (Here’s the link to it, in case you’re wondering: https://kailedger.tumblr.com/post/621351027189350400/for-all-the-yoi-fanfic-authors) But since it did, I decided to make a part two, sort of? It's not gonna be about mistakes in fanfiction, but more about things English-speaking authors don't mention simply because they don't know they exist.

I’ll give you the general info and then maybe throw some thoughts about how specific YOI characters would relate to that info in my personal opinion.

HOLIDAYS. We have a lot of those TBH, but I'll mention the most important ones - the ones for which we have official days off. I mean, yeah, you can find a list of those in Wikipedia, if you want, but it doesn't actually tell you the reality of things. I've already mentioned the New Year in the previous post, so let’s skip it.

23rd of February is the Defender of the Fatherland Day. It's actually for those who served in the army, but the tradition is to congratulate everyone who's male. Must have something to do with the fact that on 8th of March we have an International Women's Day, when we congratulate everyone who's female. Doesn't really make sense to me, since, you know, there are women in the army too. And a lot of men haven't served a day in their life, what the hell do I have to thank them for? (Here's an example: my dad used to be in the navy, submarine's captain actually, and every year when I congratulate him, he says something along the lines of "Why? There was no war conflict when I served". That's him being humble, but still, the point is there).

ANYWAY! We're not very big on celebrations of these two holidays, most of the time you just give a call to your respective male/female friends and relatives, give flowers to the ladies and just... enjoy your day off?

Next one is the May holidays. Those are usually on the 1-3 of May, the official name (as Wiki states) is "The Day of Spring and Labour". Honestly, no one uses it lol We just say "the first May holidays" (since we also have the second, that's how much we don't wanna work in May; kinda ironic the holiday is called "the day of labour").

You don't congratulate anyone on this day, usually you just have a couple of days off. If we're lucky, the weather would be nice and then people go to the countryside to have a (oh my god, this is gonna be a mouthful) SHASHLYKI. We'll get back to this thing, and you know why? Since if you want someone to embrace the real Russian culture, you would make them go to shashlyki, trust me.

The second May holiday is the Victory Day, and it's kinda... controversial in a way. It is a big celebration for the victory in World War II. Soviet Union suffered a lot during the war with the Nazi Germany, St. Petersburg was under the siege for more than TWO YEARS. And this holiday is both somber and happy since thanks to our ancestors we survived this hell and are now able to live in peace. The celebration is pretty big on official levels - there are military parades everywhere, concerts, people thank the war veterans (there are precious few of them left by now). When I was still in school, they made us visit those parades every year. Guess what? I've never been to a single parade since I graduated. It's not that I don't value the heroism of people who fought in WWII, it's that I think our government uses this holiday to brag how great we are (or, rather, THEY are), 'cause they haven't done anything worth of praise since 1945, which is... depressing, when you think of it. The ridiculous thing is the parade was canceled this year due to coronavirus, but GUESS WHAT? They've used BILLIONS OF DOLLARS to still have it on 24th of June. While the rate of people getting sick is still abnormally high. All because on the 1st of July we're having a vote on the constitution amendments and our government needs an extra boost in patriotism from our people (should I mention some of the amendments are homophobic? Yeah, it sucks).

Well... that was a rant completely offtopic lol. But, you know, this is the opinion of the most people below the age of 35. Also a huge problem here in Russia. Anyway, as I was saying. Used to be a really great holiday where we thanked the veterans and were reminded of the price they paid. Now it's just a sad excuse for the government to waste money sigh

So, a day off. Some fireworks, a hell lot of traffic problems due to parades. Not much else, if you're from the younger generation.

Same thing goes to the 12th of June. Officially a "Russia Day", but since up until the point I graduated from the uni I had summer holidays, I barely even acknowledged the holiday, cause I didn't have to study/work anyway. So like... I lived my whole life here in Russia, and I have no idea why we celebrate this holiday on the 12th of June. I can google it right now, but that kind of would contradict my point here lol.

The last one is on the 3-4 of November. I think it's called something like "Unity Day", but, again, no idea why. Most of the time we just call it "the November holidays" or even "fall holidays". Honestly, most of the time we just care about the days off, especially if the holiday is supposed to be "patriotic". (When I put it like this, we kinda sound like assholes. Probably cause we are lol).

Birthdays mainly depend on the specific person. I used to love my birthdays and it was a big holiday for me when I was a kid, but then I turned 18 and it kinda lost its charm. You still celebrate it, especially if the date is something like 30, 35, 40, 45 and so on. But it gets less and less exciting over the years. I gather my friends at home and just have drinks, my fiance goes to a bar on his birthday. Not very... celebratory, ya know?

So. YOI characters. ALL OF THEM would definitely celebrate New Year. They would probably send some congratulations on 23rd of February and 8th of March. It you think of the Russian rinkmates as friends, they can go the countryside together on the first May holidays, but not actually do anything on the Victory Day (Yakov may attend the parade since he’s from the older generation). Nothing specific to do on 12th of June or November holidays, most likely the rink would be closed, so, like, just a day off.

And now to the important stuff. SHASHLYKI. Oh my god guys, I’m so excited, cause this is one of those things that is AWESOME in Russian culture. And also makes most of the foreigners really confused. But it has some similarities with the American barbeque gatherings, I think.

First of all, many of us live in big cities (like I live in St. Petersburg for example), but we still have countryside houses. Sometimes it’s where our grandparents live, sometimes we buy it specifically. The thing is – we usually go to these places we call “dacha” to have some rest from the noise of the big city and enjoy the fresh air. Usually dachas have gardens, my mom is crazy about all this greenery stuff (I personally don’t see what’s the big deal with taking care of the plants, but I was told it comes with age ;D).

And to enjoy the experience even more we have shashlyki. It’s usually grilled meat (chicken, pork, whichever you prefer) and vegetables, but the process is what makes it really fun. Most families have their own recipes for marinated meat, you prepare it beforehand. Then, on the day, you make some snacks (salted pickles and fresh vegetables come to my mind immediately; pickles are like a must-have, it’s almost an obligatory food since it goes really well with vodka lol). While some of the people sit around the table, have drinks and catch up, there’s usually one person responsible for grilling meat. And this process is very important – it’s gotta be cooked on the brazier with actual flame (or, more like, coals). You put pieces of meat on a metallic skewer and then grill it (I think there’s the word “kebab”, but we usually use it to describe an entirely different meal, so, shashlyk it is). And let me tell you – having a freshly grilled shashlyk with some vegetables and a drink like wine (or vodka if you’re into it) is the best feeling in the world.

So you’re enjoying the fresh air, really tasty meal, have some drinks with family or/and friends. A pretty common thing (not for everyone, but I personally love it) is having someone play the guitar and sing songs around the campfire. The songs we sing are usually either stupid or old, and you would never just casually listen to those on your own, but when the time comes and you sit with the guitar, somehow EVERYONE knows the lyrics. The point is to have fun, not make a concert out of it :)

I actually think that Victor and the rest of the gang would at least try to give Yuuri (and other non-Russians, who knows) this kind of experience. I also headcanon someone (Otabek or maybe Victor himself) knowing how to play the guitar. But I wouldn’t trust Victor with the grilling, honestly, it requires a lot of attention, and… well… you all know what Victor is like ;D

And since we’re on the topic of music, let’s discuss it. Me and a dear friend of mine @clarie-foster, who also happens to be both Russian and a YOI fan, had a lot of headcanons on this.

What you need to know, is when it comes to music, here in Russia we’re pretty flexible. The popular music is the one you can here everywhere, it’s on European and American charts, like, I dunno, Beyonce, Ed Sheeran, Gaga etc. There’s Russian pop-music and, honestly, it sucks lol. Most of the time I listen to it cause it’s dumb and catchy. There are some good artists, of course, I can throw you a couple of name bands like “Ночные Снайперы”, “Сплин”, “Би-2”, but the songs are in Russian, and although the lyrics are pretty damn good, they’re kinda hard to understand if you don’t know the language (I mean, just reading the translation won’t give you the whole experience). And those bands are… depressing? In a way? Not that the songs are extremely dark or something, but you kind of listen to those in a melancholic mood. Me and one of my best friends used to go out on the balcony in summer, sit wrapped in a blanket and listen to those songs. Great experience, if a little sad.

BUT. There’s the old pop-music. We have some of those artists, who were really popular when my parents were young and somehow still popular these days. Their music is honestly average – the tunes might be catchy, the lyrics are mediocre at best, but… when you have a little bit to drink, you get in that mood, where you start singing those old pop-songs. And it’s not like listening to ABBA or, I don’t know, A-ha, since those are classic and still good these days. Russian pop-songs SUCK, they’re horrible, but somehow that is the best kind of music when you’re drunk.

I personally think Victor is one of those people who would totally jam to the old Russian pop. It’s funny, since most of it is from female singers (There’s literally a song from a Russian singer Irina Allegrova called “Go crazy, wild empress”, no kidding). I just can picture him so clearly being drunk and singing those old songs with abandon lol.

Mila would probably join him while laughing hysterically. Georgi too, since he’s a drama queen. And Yuri would make all kinds of disgusted faces.

Two facts which I have never seen being mentioned in fanfiction, which is really weird. So Victor lives in St. Petersburg, as we all saw from those last scenes in the anime (in the background you can see actual places from St. P like our sports stadium). And St. Petersburg is mostly known for two things: bridges and white nights.

WHITE NIGHTS OH MY GOD. I don’t want to go to deep into the details since I don’t really understand the nature of this thing (something to do with sun not really going down? I dunno), but in summer, especially in June and July it basically doesn’t get dark in St. Petersburg. I mean, the sun does go down, you can see the sunset and everything, but the sky stays like… white-grey, almost as though it’s midday, just cloudy. Like we’re in the middle of white nights right now, and the darkest hour is around 1 am, but even then it doesn’t really get dark at all. A lot of people from other cities and countries get confused by it, like, there was this time when Stephen Colbert was a guest on a Russian talk-show and he had a hilarious convo with the host. It was something like this: “So I’ve been in St. Petersburg for one day. It has lasted for 46 hours. Please tell me if the sun will ever go down, ‘cause I’m going crazy”.

For us common people white nights can get really annoying, if your curtains are not black-out, you can have a hard time falling asleep (since, you know, it’s too freaking bright outside). But it’s actually really great for late-night walks and is considered really romantic.

And, speaking of romantic, the bridges! What’s so special about those, you’d think. So St. Petersburg is built on the river Neva – it’s like really big, has a lot of tributaries and distributaries and flows through the whole city. Hence why we have tons of bridges.

And those bridges are drawing bridges, meaning they are separated in the middle by a special mechanism and are being lifted in the air so that the trade ships can pass underneath them. The most impressive one is the Palace Bridge – it’s one of the main sightseeing spots in the city. For most tourists it’s obligatory to visit St. Petersburg and see the drawing of the Palace Bridge. It happens at night, around the time of 1 am or 2 am. It’s really pretty, cause there are lights everywhere, you can see the ships passing by and the view of this huge structure being lifted in the air is really magnificent. Combine it with the white nights and you’ll have one of the most romantic dates you can have here in Russia.

(On the more realistic and depressing note: despite the drawing of the bridges being really beautiful, it’s SUCH a pain in the ass for the regular people. Like, because of the drawing you can’t really get from one side of the city to another. For example, I live in the northern part and if for some reason I couldn’t get to it from the center of the city before the drawing of the bridges, I’m stuck till like 4 or 5 am. Subway only opens at 6 am, and although we have a couple of bridges which never draw, those are on the outskirts of the city, so taking an uber and driving there would cost you a lot of money and also would take like and extra hour or so. Thankfully, the drawing of the bridges lasts only from April to October-November, while the ship navigation on the Neva river is possible).

Last, but not least, SOCIAL MEDIA.

So, like, Instagram is pretty popular in Russia and so is Twitter. But what people rarely mention is our own social media site – Vkontakte (www.vk.com, if you’re interested). It started to become popular in like… 2008, I think? Basically it used to be and knock-off from Facebook, even the color scheme is the same. It became more and more popular over the years, since Facebook was never really a thing in Russia (like, I had a profile there, but I’ve never used it). Now it’s like… if you don’t have a VK profile, it’s super weird lol. I communicate with most of my friends through it, since it has a lot of really cool features: chats, group chats, communities, music, videos and photos. It’s gotten so big that VK even hosts its own music festival each year with a lot of popular Russian artists.

Victor is a social butterfly, so he would definitely have a VK profile. So would Mila, Yuri and Georgi, I personally think most of their communication would be through it. Maybe they would even force Yuuri to create a profile, but he’s not really into social media much, so he wouldn’t really use it.

I think that’s it for now. Like I said, if you have any questions, feel free to ask, I would be happy to answer! ;)

#yoi #yuri on ice #yuuri on ice #victor nikiforov #viktor nikirofov #yuuri katsuki #victuuri #viktuuri #yuri plisetsky #mila babicheva #georgi popovich #and all this russia-related stuff

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subbyboymax · 4 years ago

Note

I want to ask you all of them 🙈🙈

So why won’t you ask all of them? Huh anon?

Jk I love you whoever you are. As requested:

1. Zodiac sign

Taurus. I don’t really pay much attention to zodiac stuff but I’ve heard from friends that I fit the stereotypes somewhat.

2. Sexual orientation

This is hard because I’m kinda questioning atm, but I would say I like women and identify as NB using male pronouns which I personally feel is accurate to me, but I still am unsure myself what that actually means. I am still figuring myself out.

3. Relationship status

Single and honestly looking. I’ve had one girlfriend in high school and I’ve had romantic interests since but I have such low self confidence that I end up being too nervous to really pursue a relationship.

4. Someone you miss

My friend Rebekah. I miss her a lot. She’s like a sister to me.

5. Person who’s arms you’d like to be in

Hmmmmmmmmm... anyone really...

6. What you find attractive in Men/Women?

Typically I find personality attractive and looks don’t really matter, but usually someone’s smile and eyes draw my attention the most.

7. How tall are you?

5’7 or ~170cm but I wish I was more smol.

8. What you love about yourself?

Already answered

9. What you’re doing tomorrow?

I’m probably going to exercise and play games with my gaming clan.

10. What are your future plans?

My goal is to become an electrician, but I also want to go to various Asian countries and try to improve my Asian cooking by studying the food culture all over east asia.

11. Your last night out in detail?

Oh god I don’t even remember the last time I was out at night... I guess it was last year when I had my heart broken and I went to a really nice bar and spent $200 on alcohol and was GONE. Never again. Ended up being hung over for the first time in my life.

12. Your favorite book?

Hmm... favorite book(s) would have to be the Ranger’s Apprentice series of books. Good story, good characters.

13. All of pets you’ve ever had?

I’ve had so many pets I could make a whole post about them and may do that later.

14. Something that changed your life?

Unfortunately too many things have happened to change my life more than I would like. I still can’t really answer this question fully.

15. Do you remember your last dream?

I was basically playing a game that turned out to be an isekai and I basically had a SMG and had to fight off a dragon. Shit was weird but very vivid. It’s weird because I don’t particularly like guns or dangerous stuff in general.

16. What your last text message says?

“Keep me posted! We should meet up and have a toast to it!” was sent to my friend Renè, who has been my best friend since birth pretty much. Our parents were close while they were pregnant with us and we are practically brothers. He’s getting a house near where I live and we will live in the same state for the first time since we were 8 years old. Obviously we will social distance but we still had to celebrate and see each other to mark the occasion.

17. Do you respect your government and the way your country is run?

Absolutely not. Please vote biden if you live in the US. Even if you hate the idea of voting for biden, he’s better than trump. If hillary had won, she would have been putting her third justice on the supreme court. Biden is the only chance for our freedom and for the freedom of many people. I am terrified of 4 more years of trump.

18. Where you would like to live?

South Florida, where I was born.

19. Your favorite flavor of ice cream?

Depends on my mood, but typically strawberry.

20. Last thing you ate?

Pizza that was left over from last night.

21. Which swear word do you use the most?

Fuck. Like I use it so much it’s stupid.

22. Your plans for summer?

Heh... plans...

23. Any upcoming concerts?

Bruh if only. Like I work as an usher and as a stagehand, so if any concerts were happening at all I would JUMP for joy. And I am CHONK so jumping is not exactly the most comfortable thing to do.

24. Something that you’re proud of?

That I am finally committing to getting therapy for my long list of traumas.

25. Do you still talk to your first crush?

I wish I could, but she’s not part of my life anymore, sadly. She was a good friend.

26. What language do you want to learn?

Japanese, because I really have a strong interest in their history and culture and want to go sightseeing there someday.

27. Where have you lived before?

Ft. Lauderdale, Florida and St. Louis, Missouri.

28. Eye color?

I think it’s green or something but it changes depending on the light because it’s sometimes more silvery idk.

29. Favorite style of clothing?

Traditional Japanese formal wear. It’s always been an interest of mine.

30. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

All of one minute to throw on an outfit and get socks on. I wish I had an eye for fashion but hopefully if I ever have a partner, they will help me with my style choices a bit lol.

31. Where did you go today?

Nowhere, because pandemic lmao.

32. Where are you right now?

In my room wishing I could have cuddles.

33. How many countries have you visited?

None because money is not exactly a thing we have an abundance of.

34. Something old?

What does this mean? I guess I have my great grandfather’s old stamp collection.

35. Something new?

Hell if I know, I’ve had nothing new in months.

36. Something inherited?

My laptop.

37. Is death more scary than life?

Hell no. Death is easy. Life is scary and overwhelming but it’s worth living the life you have. You only lose out on life by dying before your time. You gain nothing in death, despite it being less scary and uncertain than living is. Keep living to experience everything you can and have no regrets once you do pass on.

38. Experience you’ll never forget?

The time my high school crush complimented my hair in physics class. I get very few compliments and I never feel that attractive so I hardly focus on my appearance but I had brushed my hair that day and the fact she commented on it made me smile very wide.

39. What’s your favorite part about today so far?

Honestly today has sucked and I have been dealing with depression but I am trying to stay positive. Hopefully the answer to this question changes later today!

40. Who is your hero?

My Great-Grandmother. She was part of my life until I was 17 and she taught me that kindness and compassion is the most important trait for a human to have. She was the most amazing woman I have ever met in my life.

41. Are you happy with where you live?

I love this house, but it’s definitely not perfect and I would love to have my own place someday.

42. Do you like your handwriting?

Ew no it looks like alien language. It’s so bad. I can barely read my own writing.

43. What do you wear to bed?

Typically just underwear, or in the winter I will wear a T-shirt and fleecy pants.

44. Tea or coffee?

Tea

45. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Chocolate hands down. It’s such a varied flavor imo.

46. Are you excited for anything?

Being okay someday.

47. How late did you stay up last night and why?

Midnight because sleep is hard.

48. What’s your ringtone?

I’m boring and keep my phone on vibrate so no ringtone.

49. Did you have a dream last night?

Yes, I said it earlier.

50. What keeps you going each day?

Honestly no fucking idea lmao.

51. Picture of yourself?

You’ll have to DM me for that one, friendo. Anons get no face pics!

Also for the other people who sent in asks, I saw them, but I figured I could just use this ask to consolidate and not spam posts. Thank all of you for sending in asks, you are the best <3

#Asks #Thank you anon

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parrishh · 4 years ago

Text

Dig a little deeper

tagged by @gcralts thank u libby ily

i’m putting this under the cut because it’s long!

1. do you prefer writing with a black pen or a blue pen? blue!

2. would you prefer to live in the country or in the city? oh i’m definitely a city gal (to be totally honest, i’m actually a suburban homebody, but i couldn’t live in the country)

3. if you could learn a new skill, what would it be? i have owned a guitar for...five years? and have never learned how to play it so that would be good

4. do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? tea sometimes, coffee always

5. what was your favorite book as a child? oh gosh i had so many...ella enchanted by gail carson levine (still my favorite book), the children of noisy village by astrid lindgren (but in polish, the english version is missing too much of the story), & stargirl by jerry spinelli come to mind first

6. do you prefer baths or showers? showers, definitely

7. if you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? i just want to be a witch/wizard, that’s all

8. paper or electronic books? oh, god, paper, no question

9. what is your favorite item of clothing? i have this oversized forest green sweatshirt from the park my family goes camping in every year and it’s my favorite thing ever

10. do you like your name? would you like to change it? i...really don’t love it, but i don’t think i would change it at this point in my life

11. who is a mentor to you? i mean, to take this question very literally, since i was a new teacher this past year i was assigned a mentor teacher at the school i work at and she’s so wonderful! i text her with so many questions all of the time and she never loses patience with me

12. would you like to be famous? if so, what for? it’s my dream to publish a book one day and of course i’d want it to do well, so, yes, i’d like to be famous for that

13. are you a restless sleeper? i mean, kind of? i’m a light sleeper but i don’t think i move around that much in my sleep

14. do you consider yourself to be a romantic person? very much so, yes

15. which element best represents you? earth earth earth

16. who do you want to be closer to? this is probably not what this question is asking for but i wish my good friends on here lived closer to me (or at least on the same continent) so i could see them irl

17. do you miss someone at the moment? of course! covid has kept me away from so many of my loved ones

18. tell us about an early childhood memory. i remember standing in my grandparents’ living room back in poland when i was probably around two. my grandma gave me a bag of clothespins and i was throwing them out the window for my grandpa to catch and i thought it was so fun! they’ve both passed since then so it’s a memory i cherish

19. what is the strangest thing you have eaten? i ate an entire post-it note once? just because someone told me i wouldn’t

20. what are you most thankful for? i was in a dark place in my life for...a long time, so i’m incredibly grateful for the wonderful people i have in my life now who help keep me away from that place

21. do you like spicy food? yes but my tolerance isn’t as high as i’d like to think it is

22. have you ever met someone famous? literally the most random people. wesley stromberg from emblem3, kaylin white from kaylin and miles, & alli simpson (???) come to mind. also, one time, at a concert in, like, 2013, i met a bunch of youtube beauty gurus i used to watch back then. i don’t even remember who they all were, but one of them was claudia sulewski and i still adore her. i’ve met the members of my favorite band (the maine) multiple times, as well as cameron leahy from the downtown fiction (that was many, many years ago) and the members of the griswolds. ooh, and i met the 1975 at an album signing!

23. do you keep a diary or journal? i used to! i had one of those “one line a day” journals and i wrote in it every day for five years, but i finished it last year and since then i haven’t journaled at all

24. do you prefer to use pen or pencil? pen

25. what is your star sign? taurus

26. do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? um, soggy cereal can stay far away from me

27. what would you want your legacy to be? i just want to inspire my students and my future children, if i have any, to make the world a more equitable place

28. do you like reading? what was the last book you read? do i ever! i just finished crooked kingdom by leigh bardugo

29. how do you show someone you love them? if i love someone, i want to share pieces of my life with them, so i’ll reach out about things i’ve read or watched or thought about with them on a regular basis! also, when it comes to being in person, i’m very touchy-feely with people i love

30. do you like ice in your drinks? sure, but it’s not a must for me

31. what are you afraid of? something happening to my younger brother (i have nightmares about it all the time, for no good reason), never finding someone i want to spend my life with, finding out that people i care about are only pretending to like me

32. what is your favorite scent? everyone always comes for me for this but warm milk

33. do you address older people by their name or surname? surname, i guess, but i just try to avoid addressing them by name if i’m unsure lol

34. if money was not a factor, how would you live your life? jeez, i don’t know...i’d travel! a lot!

35. do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools! now if you asked me pools vs. lakes, that would be a different story

36. what would you do if you found $50 in the ground? i’d probably just keep it but it depends on the likelihood of determining where it came from

37. have you ever seen a shooting star? did you make a wish? yes and probably

38. what is one thing you would want to teach your children? how not to be an asshole

39. if you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? i already have two! i do want more, though! the next one i have planned is something related to my favorite band (the maine), and i want it on my ribs

40. what can you hear now? air conditioning, and someone rummaging through a bag in the kitchen

41. where do you feel the safest? i’m not sure, but the first thought that came into my head was in the backseat of the car, at night, while my dad is driving

42. what is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? i’ve been telling myself that i should go see a therapist for the past, i don’t know, ten years, so i want to actually overcome my fear of taking that leap and just go

43. if you could travel back to any era, what would it be? i’m as content as i can be in this era, things used to be even more messed up than they are now. if i had to time travel, i suppose i’d like to experience being a young adult in the 70′s or 80′s (the music scene UGH)

44. what is your most used emoji? 😊 or 🙃 or 🥺

45. describe yourself using one word. persevering

46. what do you regret the most? something i’m not ready to share

47. last movie you saw? the hate u give!

48. last tv show you watched? love, victor!!!!! it was so good!!!!!!

49. invent a word and its meaning i’m lame but i literally can’t think of anything

tagging: @hathawaywrites @gcndalf @remusjlvpins @phantomness @louvegoods @kazbrekkerrs (only if you want to, no pressure!)

#this one got pretty deep #it was fun #tag games #w says things

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kebinwooo · 4 years ago

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quarantine time!!

tagged by @theyoungflexer as you all know! LOL thank you again chelle ^^

rules: answer these questions and tag 5 mutuals

1. Flowers or chocolates? chocolates! i like food LOL

2. Between day and night I prefer: night (i accidentally became a night owl like two years ago and now... well...)

3. My favorite drink: boba hehehehe but i really like tea in general too!

4. Between sunrise and sunset I prefer: sunsets

5. Between dogs and cats I prefer: oooooof hard question but imma go with cats. a cat lived in my flat last year at school and i miss him deeply T___T

6. The vegetable i hate the most: idk brussel sprouts? i had a friend keep trying to convince me they’re good and each time just 🤮🤮

7. My favorite sound: uhhhhhhhh i’m blanking LMAO i kinda like how it sounds when it’s raining? but like only when i’m inside AHAHA

8. The first thing I notice about people: their smile? idk LOL

9. Would you prefer horror or fantasy? fantasy. i read too much ya fantasy for my own good (i say as if i actually read much anymore) also i’m a scaredy cat and cannot handle horror for my LIFE

10. I’d want to be stuck in a lift with: oh uh idk shownu? he’s such a generally calm person that it would (hopefully) balance out me panicking like crazy. plus it seems like he’ll actually figure out a way to get us out LOL

11. What city or town you’d like to live in? i want to live in seoul one day (that sounds so kboo of me oh my god) but like not permanently i dont think. it just seems like it’d be a pretty fun experience. i would also love to live in oxford! i was studying there for a summer and it was just SO beautiful and i loved the town so much and AGH definitely want to go back

12. What I value most in life: love, peace and happiness? LMAO THAT SOUNDS SO CHEESY but i just want a peaceful, secure life surrounded with love and what makes me happy and i also want that for my loved ones too. basically i just want there to be good in the world

13. If I could learn any skill, it’d be: cooking.... i literally can’t cook and that’s something i definitely need to learn at some point

14. Between the beach and the mountains, I prefer: beach but mostly bc i’m afraid of heights and have no stamina to hike LOL aesthetically tho? mountain! i lived in near perfect view of mt. rainier back at college and i MISS HER SO MUCH

15. I’d love to get married in: i’d like to get married period LOL. but no specific place i have in mind tho?

16. My hidden talent: ......i have no idea if i even have one?? nothing’s coming to mind so....

17. If I could bring anyone back to life, I’d bring back: jonghyun ;;

18. Why? i just... miss him ;; i want to be able to tell him he did really well and that many people love and miss him. i’m sure he’s in a better place now but i also just want to show him the amount of love he still has even tho he’s gone

19. Rainy or sunny day? SUNNY PLEASE. i have had enough rainy days living in washington to last my lifetime

20. Who’s the real model of your life? i’m assuming this means role model. in which case, honestly speaking, jun of ukiss. he’s super talented (QUADRUPLE THREAT) and capable and works super hard but is such a down-to-earth, humble guy who easily makes friends and loves deeply (nobody is a bigger ukiss fanboy than jun ;;) and i just admire the amount of dedication and passion he has

21. How I relax after a hard day: melting into the couch and staring into space LMAO i’m only half kidding. i also like to watch stupid youtube videos that makes me laugh and like not think

22. I like the way I look: ehhhhhhh.... i’m not exactly confident but i also don’t hate myself either

23. My most favorite facial features of myself is: ............... :) i don’t have an answer to that

24. My most favorite part of my body is: i have nice fingers hehe they’re long and pretty and i’ve gotten quite the few compliments on them so yeah

25. If I could change anything about my body: MY OILY FACE

26. If yes, what’s it: I’VE HAD A BREAKOUT ON MY CHEEKS SINCE LIKE APRIL AND IT HASN’T CLEARED UP AND I’M ANGRY!!!!!!!!! PEOPLE LIKE JOOHEON WHO ARE BORN WITH NEAR PERFECT SKIN MAKE ME ANGRY!!!!! I WANT THAT FOR ME WHY IS IT SO HARD!!!!!!!

27. If I could change something from my past: i can’t tell? i mean as much as i regret some decisions in the past, i’m fine with where i am now, so i don’t think i would change anything drastic. superficially tho, i wish i could’ve gone to a bap or the rose concert at least once bc i MISS THEM AND I HAD MULTIPLE OPPORTUNITIES TO GO SEE THEM AND I DIDN’T TAKE THEM!!! WHICH WAS DUMB WHY DID I DO THAT

28. How many piercings I have: none LOL

29. I like makeup? no

30. I wear make up everyday: definitely no

31.My skin type is: def oily (see #25)

32. My skin tone: idk how to describe? i do know i got REALLY pale after i started going to college bc i got barely any sun exposure LMAO

33. My hair color: black and leftover red/auburn(?) from my dye job back in january

34. My height: 5′4″

35. My age: 20... BUT I’M TURNING 21 NEXT WEEK AHHHHHHH

36. My birthday: august 21 :)

37. My best friend: if you’re reading this melissa, it’s definitely not you >:( i’m kidding LOL i have several best friends and now that i’m listing it out in my head i’m like oh i have at least five if not a few more... idk what that says about me. i’m a loving person alright?

38. I have a pet or more: not anymore :(( warrior fish i miss you T_T

39. If I don’t, I’d like to adopt: no. imma be honest i suck at taking care of pets and i cannot handle the responsibility of another living being so even if i want a pet, i really know i shouldn’t get one

40. Video games or social media: social media

41. I’ve visited outside my country: yep. i have a major case of wanderlust

42. I’ve an innocent/dirty mind: depends? i have a dirtier mind than some of my friends but also sometimes dirty things just fly over my head and i’m left blinking innocently at the situation like wut o-o

43. Someone proposed me or asked me out? LMAO NO. i’ve been single since birth. i got asked to formal once but like.... it was the world’s lamest/dumbest asking and i didn’t end up going bc it was super last minute lmao

44. If yes, then I liked it and accepted or the opposite: read above

45. Do you follow some celebrities’ fashion: no? i have bought like a thing or two bc i thought a celebrity wearing it was cool but i never deliberately followed somebody’s fashion

46. What do you think about your fashion sense: plain, comfy, really generic LOL

47. You found someone copying your fashion: lmao my fashion sense is too generic for anybody to copy/want to follow so nice try

48. Can you do your makeup properly: uhhhhhhhhhh like the very very very basics: foundation, concealer, blush, eyeshadow. that’s about it

49. You go or used to go with makeup to school: still a no

50. What color suits you best? i wear a lot of gray, black, blue, green, turquoise/teal and purple LOL also a lot of stripes. but i think army green suits me best

51. Finally, how is quarantine going? ehhhhhhh about as good as it can go.

not tagging anyone again but feel free to do this if you want!

#thanks for tagging me again chelle!#your answers were pretty interesting haah #also the question about favorite sound is nagging at me bc i'm sure i have a more interesting answer BUT I CANT REMEMBER ANYTHING ARGH #anyways whatever i'M OVER IT

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blog-sliverofjade · 5 years ago

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Omega Protocol 27: Interrogation

Summary: In the mid-21st century, the elite decided to cement society’s strata into our DNA, creating a genetic caste system. One of the early Omegas is cryogenically frozen and forgotten. Revived nearly two centuries later, she has no idea what she has become and has to navigate a strange new world while surrounded by Alphas, whatever those are.

Leading the military arm of his people in exile on a dangerous planet is no easy feat for Captain Niklaus Reed. He has to build and secure a settlement against megafauna straight out of the Ice Age before families start arriving on the distant planet. When an Omega is found in an old research base, things become… complicated.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26

Word Count: 1592

Much love to my awesome beta @pandabearer

“Talk to me.” Emma looked up from where she was idly tracing invisible designs on the ridges of his abdomen. It was the first time the Alpha had solicited her thoughts on anything.

“About what?”

“What happened last night.” Pulling away from him, she curled in on herself. Or rather, she tried to. Niklaus let her withdraw slightly, but his half-embrace held firm when she would have turned away. “Nice try.”

“How did you know…?” That I tried to literally curl up and die? He merely looked at her. Right, the thing between them that she’d been studiously trying to ignore. “I thought that they’d threatened to string you up by your thumbs if you didn’t leave me alone?”

“I think it involved honey, rope, and those giant fire ants. Or was it the death wasps?” She giggled at the mental picture, which was no doubt his intent. “I couldn’t just sit there with my thumb up my ass while you destroyed yourself,” he admitted once the laughter subsided. “You’re not talking to anyone. I figure I’m already on your shit list, might as well make you talk.”

“You’re going to interrogate me? Kinky.”

He didn’t dignify that with a response.

She lay there stiffly. Bracing his free hand behind his head, he tilted his face, eyes half-lidded, a little more towards the faint light filtering in. One could have been fooled into thinking he was dozing if they couldn’t see him rubbing small circles against her back.

When she finally did speak, her voice was raspy due to a dry mouth and being quiet for so long, not because of any lump in her throat. “I didn’t fight.” The words were barely even a breath. He waited until it was apparent she wasn’t going to continue.

“What did you do?” Turning to shelter her with his body, he petted her hair. This was a softer man than the one she’d first met, yet neither was he treating her with kid gloves like nearly everyone else was.

“I threw Fluffybutt at his face and ran.” Nik chuckled and she joined him, although hers was partly a choked sob.

“I knew something was wrong when your damn chicken came back squawking her head off. For that alone, she’s earned a stay of execution.” For all that she’d threatened to fry the bird at the time, Emma had to agree.

“I should’ve fought back,” she murmured to the scar on his chest that had suddenly become fascinating.

“With what? A chicken and harsh words?”

“There were sticks.” She wasn’t being defensive, she was pointing out facts.

“He was twice your size and had a spear,” he said in the same flat manner he did when dressing down one of his people for doing something mildly stupid. It had very rarely been directed at her. “You did the smart thing. Chances are he’d have killed you where you stood for challenging him. Running was your best choice. He was still faster, but you didn’t just stand there, did you?”

“No.” God, she’d rather go through chemo again than have this conversation.

“And the head wound didn’t help, did it?” Worrying at her bottom lip, she shook her head. “What else do you think you could’ve done?”

“Don’t patronize me!” Her ire lent her the fortitude to meet his gaze.

“I’m not.” A low, hard statement. “I’m trying to break you out of this spin you’re in.” When she would have ducked her head again to hide her vulnerability, he gripped her chin and stared into her eyes. “You’re too focused on what you think you should have done when the truth is you chose the course that ensured the greatest chance of survival.” The steely commander was back, yet there was nothing cool or distant about him now; the fiery intensity that lay just beneath the surface wouldn’t permit that.

“I’m tired of feeling weak.” She shook her head and her hair fell across her eyes, reminding her that she always suffered from the most horrendous bedhead. Sitting up, she worked her fingers through her hair in an attempt to get it looking less like a camel had chewed on it in her sleep. How does it manage to be both greasy and frizzy? “I’m tired of not having control over anything that happens to me. They took me from my home- my planet!- and changed me without my knowledge. then to freeze and forget about me. I’m still not sure how to feel about… my heat.” She had hated feeling that helpless and out of control. “Then that happened, and you did this!” A hand waved at the scar on her neck. “I don’t even remember the last time I could make a major decision for myself.” Her voice broke and trailed off. “I don’t even know if I can trust you.”

Reed felt like someone had cut him off at the knees and allowed a herd of moofalo to run over his body. His mate didn’t trust him, and he’d given her precious little reason to. She had scooted away from him to sit with her back against the wall. Already he missed the warm weight of her against him, leaving him cold, which was a rare sensation for him.

“From what I understand this is permanent.” There was no divorce for their kind. “What are my choices? Do I get any or are you going to keep dictating to me?” The hunch of her shoulders was a knife to his gut. “Makes me wonder what the point of living is if this could even be called a life.” He had taken bullets that hurt less than her speech.

“Don’t you dare give up now. You’ve survived too much for that.” It came out roughly, bordering on a growl, but she didn’t flinch. “Besides, you still have a chance to make me regret claiming you.”

“Spite as motivation to live?” A wry twist to her mouth.

“If it works.”

“You’re saying you don’t already regret this?”

“Not yet,” he smirked.

“Oh, you are going to regret saying that.” A small smile bloomed but faded before reaching its fullness. “What were those things?”

Blowing out a breath, he sat up to sit against the other wall, perpendicular to her.

“Not all of the original test subjects were as successful as you. The original batch of Alphas and Betas were feral, attacked the research team, and escaped.” They had also committed unspeakable acts in the process, but she didn’t need to know that when she had already had a glimpse of it. “Those are their descendants. We call them ferals or nomads because they cycle through different outposts depending on the season. Rooster started calling them nad’s, short for Nasty Ass Dickriders.” The term wasn’t one he’d normally use in front of an Omega, but the crude phrasing startled a chuckle out of her like he’d suspected it would.

“They’re like cavemen, like they devolved?”

“The going theory is that when they were tinkering with the genetic code, they went a little too far back in our evolutionary timeline. The next team thought to get around the intelligence issue by splicing in animal DNA to get the strength and stamina they were looking for,” he explained.

“Wait, you’re saying they killed the first team and then sent another?” Her eyebrows climbed towards her hairline.

“It was merely a ‘setback.’” His lip still curled at the memory of the classified reports he had been privy to as part of his training. While those back on Earth might not want their kind around, they still wanted to experiment with a colony on an exoplanet, just not with “proper humans.” That meant certain information had to be shared or else risk inevitable failure. “The second succeeded, despite another concerted attack from the ferals. They decided it was safe to return because at that point they could argue that we counted as an extra-terrestrial species and thus exempt from the ban on tinkering with human genetics.”

“That’s a twisted sort of logic that sadly makes sense.”

“No one told you?” They had agreed to keep the nads’ existence from her to avoid adding to her stress load, no one suspecting that she would wander beyond the protected core, but he’d assumed that someone would have told her after the incident. Part of him was glad that she had come to him, hoped that she trusted him enough to tell the truth.

“I think Barbie tried, but I really didn’t feel like talking.” She smoothed a pillow and fussed with its placement. “Where do we go from here, Nik?”

He knew what he wanted to do, which was keep her close where he could protect her. What he said was, “What do you want?”

Emma was silent for so long he wasn’t certain she would answer.

“I want to learn to defend myself.”

“We can start this afternoon.” The response didn’t even require thought, it was automatic. Like any Alpha, he wanted to be the one to protect his Omega, but he wasn’t arrogant enough to think that she would stay within a protected bubble anymore. “First, we get some food into you.”

She opened her mouth, most likely to argue, but the rumbling of her stomach interrupted. “Um, would you mind stepping out so I can get dressed?” Instead of pointing out that he’d already seen her in her birthday suit, he slipped out into the hallway and tried not to think of her wearing nothing but his mark.

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natsspammityspamspamham · 5 years ago

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Dino Rant (Nov 27 + Other Side Tales)

My siblings are currently mad at me. Here’s what went down. Tagging: @akaskira @ce-la @caratheillustrious Who are all practically my spiritual online older sister/sage advice givers and @lizard-in-the-rain who can be an idiot along with me.

For context: Ate = Sister Kuya = Brother * My dad and I have a rocky past because he’s very old-fashioned, hasn’t been always supportive about my mental health, and is really old and out of date (especially about LGBTQ, feminism, HK protests, etc.) * My sister also has a rocky past with me but has since calmed down a little thanks to old age (she’s 23) * My brother is constantly busy with school (and stressed), is still mourning his breakup after a few months which continues to salt his wounds (not because his ex is crappy but she’s really nice. He’s having a bit of trouble still.), and is a very sensitive person (more sensitive than my sister)

Further in, you can see what happened at the orchestra concert on Saturday. For context, you can check out a previous rant.

Me: Dad got some bad oil burns. I was in the family room as he was yelling “[MOM NAME x 3] WHAT DO I DO WITH OIL BURNS?” Mom was upstairs and didn’t hear They are kinda big He’s upset

Ate: What the why didn't you help him call mom???? did you??? yike oil burns are no joke bc they hurt for longer bc water just steams away but oil sticks and keeps burning and the scars are worse

Me: Uh... I was scrolling on tumblr? I don’t know. I thought he already put ice.

Ate: smh

Me: But looking back, I heard the water running for less than a minute.

Ate: LOL

Me: And never heard the freezer open

Ate: water won't help unless you use soap anyways

Me: So I thought he did that but he was really just yelling for mom He didn’t even ice it. He said he ran some water over it.

Ate: make sure you help if someone yells for help next time even if you think it's handled bc if a person is panicking/in pain they're likely not thinking straight to help themselves speaking from experience

Me: Mom tried to give him advice now and he just walked away going “uh huh”

Ate: even I know to put my hand under cold running water and ice it but I've definitely not done that when I've burnt myself before I would be pretty choked too if there were 2 other people in the house and neither of them came to help me when I got oil burns

Me: Mom was upstairs and couldn’t hear. I thought he was crying wolf as usual.He yells for mom around three times on a daily basis

Ate: fair but fr next time take the 5 seconds to check bc sometimes bad things happenesp if all you hear is a thud

Me: “[Mom Name x 3 again] I CANT FIND THE [blank]!!!” Mom: it’s been in the same spot for over a decade. Look with your eyes.

Me: Mom does that once every other day (has a big thud) usually because something broke. When I heard the yell this time, I thought it was because he knocked something over. Dad is always yelling He even asked mom how to make the rice And didn’t make it because she didn’t answer fast enough Dad is a drama queen. That’s where we all get it from.

Ate: I mean

Kuya: Tf is this situation How can you ignore someone in need of help Regardless of who it is Doesn't it hurt to see someone suffering

Me: I didn’t see anything

Kuya: Unless you hold extreme animosity Like they killed your mom or something I have to hand something in by 10 But I find this quite upsetting

Me: I didn’t see anything, and the last thing he yelled was an oil burn, and the only advice I had was water and ice which I thought he already did.

Me (in response to animosity): Not extreme, but living with him with only me as the child has screwed a lot of things up.It has taken a toll on my sympathy for people (or whatever is left)

Ate: Same but he's still our dad?

Me: Eh, I honestly thought it was a small thing until I saw it.

Ate: I have only shreds of respect for him left but idk if I would go as far as to just overlook "oil burn" and figure "oh, I can't help so I'll ignore him" like that's a lil funny

Me: Again, when someone is constantly yelling, there’s a point where you don’t listen fully to what they’re saying. It only registered later that his burns might actually be serious and more than putting your fingertip on a hot pan. I also have little sympathy due to how he’s treated me during my past situations so honestly, I’ve little tolerance.

Afterwards, my mom called my sister who was absolutely hysterical and screaming on the other line to the point where my mom had to pull the phone away from her ear.

________________

Some Stupid Orchestra Stories:

Things I have said to my orchestra cohorts that might’ve scared them:

*sees me bump my instrument* Trumpet: Ouch Me (walking away): Snitches get stitches and end up in ditches, and dead men tell no tales. Doug: What?

*sees me bump my bow* Doug: Ouch Me (tired because I was just excluded from the conversation today because no one would listen to what I had to say): I’m going to stab you Doug: Pat, protect me!

Me: *tells anything about school* Everyone: MAJOR CONCERN (Examples: Kid said that this guy could have sex with his friend before she turned 21 by slipping a drug into her drink, kid saying he was going to hit a girl with a metal bar from the desk, kids smoking out back, kids make noise downstairs which causes the room I work in to shake, kids throwing stuff out car windows, kids brawling, my science teacher from regular school failing me for practically no reason)

More of an annoying incident from me: Hannah: Who’re you messaging? Your girlfriend? Sean: Yeah Me: YOU’RE STILL TOGETHER?! Sean: (sheepishly) yeah

To be fair, I get weirded out whenever they flash their privilege as semi-well off rich kids. “Remember those special trips you get to take with your school to learn more about science? // Remember those international trips you take with your school club?” Me: ...no?! I’m not poor, I just dropped out of school before I could even go to my nearest McDonalds for a field trip.

But Doug is a little dumb sometimes. He doesn’t get my sense of humour (understandable), but he’s a little ignorant towards not-privileged people.

He literally said he goes to sleep at 9:30pm, got into university (this is a semi-prestigious one) first try with 90s in all of his classes (at least), has a girlfriend, has friends, and doesn’t understand why anyone would stay later than that unless they had poor time management. His words, not mine. My brother stays there until around 12am studying. He was not happy to hear that. Doug is first year so my siblings are making fun of him saying he will perish in a year’s time. My parents saw him stealing kisses from his girlfriend in a parking lot during the day of our last concert. I seriously though the girl in his profile picture was his sister and not his girlfriend because they were both seriously white. Whiter than a bowl of milk I tell you.

He also doesn’t know what a period app would be for. I was a little annoyed. My brother knows about this well enough because we all know my sister and mom would not let anyone in this family live if they did not know the ins-and-outs of a period. Doug was like, “Why would you need to track that?” I responded, “Because they’re irregular.” He looked a little puzzled and I said, “Douglas, you’re a science major. There’s sex ed in school.” He responded that he is going into research (not sure what that has to do with menstrual ignorance) and never paid attention during sex ed (since it’s never for marks). I then got a little more pushy and said, “Well, if you ever want a girlfriend, maybe you should learn.” To which he said, “I have a girlfriend”. To which I gave him a look of:

Stories from the orchestra concert:

I did tell the bass instructor about this so maybe it’ll get sorted out but I did this “tell the teacher” thing twice where it backfired terribly. Let’s hope university kids are a little more grown up.

My messages from that night: Pat told me it was cute when I played in the wrong spots. It was genuine like she said it was cute. But it was like ??? I was having a panic attack. My brain left my body. I don’t want to play anymore. Then she put up her bow to make sure I wouldn’t flip the page Then she hit her bow on her bass. I really don’t want to play anymore. (She also repeated the same thing twice knowing from a previous talk that I have bad anxiety. She has anxiety as well.)

Me: Then Hannah and Patricia were commenting on my shoes. I like wearing my orthotics. They make my feet feel not in pain. Ate: tell them that Me: I did They told me to take off my shoes “They can’t even see my feet” I’m all the way in the back behind people “Then take off your shoes” “But then I’ll be in pain” “But you sit” (I have one foot on the ground) “So take them off. It’s for dress code. People can see you” Ate: but it's literally a medical thing Tell them to actually fuck off hoh my god it's like asking a blind person to put their stick away bc people will trip on it or that you can't have your service dog with you like????

#dino rant

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are-youreadyforit · 5 years ago

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My Swiftie Story - it’s about time you all get to know me ❤

It started with Fearless for me. I got the deluxe album for Christmas and the rest is history. The End

Just kidding. I was 14 when I went to the Fearless Tour as my first concert in Sydney Australia. Mum bought us a ticket, and accidentally bought some kind of VIP package lol. It just meant we got pre-show canapes and a drink and early access to merch, and we had really great seats at side stage! I bought my first Taylor Swift merch; the Fearless T-shirt, brown wrist band and concert program.

I’m 16 now and I don’t know how but I got my learner’s licence. So when I was learning to drive with Mum, Fearless was in the car radio. Every time. Mum had her favourite songs and we’d sing along going for drives that had no purpose other than to get my learning hours up. We’d pick far away cafes to go to and have tea and scones hehe.

Speak Now came out later in the year that I went to the Fearless Tour. I was in year 9 at high school. I had my first boyfriend and liked trying to make Taylor’s songs relate to my relationship. But when we broke up (when he dumped me by text – yep @taylorswift I can relate), I remember posting a status of lyrics from Perfectly Good Heart 😂

I remember being so sad I couldn’t go to the Speak Now Tour because I also really liked Hot Chelle Rae and they were Taylor’s support for the Australian leg of the tour. I don’t remember now why I couldn’t go but I was sad haha

Then RED came out when I was in my second last year of high school. Mum loved the title track and would make me play it multiple times in a row, and I would always jokingly argue because I wanted to hear the whole album. 22 is still one of my anthems! And one of my biggest regrets is not making my own music video to it for my 22nd birthday 😂

The RED tour was right when I had booked my schoolies trip with my friends (in Australia this trip is a tradition for after graduating from high school). We were in Bilinga, Queensland Australia which is near(ish) Brisbane Australia. I was so desperate to go to the RED tour I hatched a plan to spend a day or two getting to Brisbane for the show and back and continuing my schoolies holiday after seeing Taylor. But mum wouldn’t let me because nobody wanted to come with me and she wouldn’t let me go by myself. I was 17 so kinda fair enough (especially being in another state) but also, god damn! This is the tour I’m MOST upset for missing; I love the RED album. Anyway, I’ve been to every tour since RED now so 🤷‍♀️.

When 1989 came out I listened to it in my car driving between mine and my boyfriend’s place basically every time I visited him. This boy became my man and we’re still together, going on 7 years in April next year! 😍❤

I actually WON my 1989 tour tickets from a local radio station!! I couldn’t afford the tickets and nobody understood that every Taylor concert is a new and wonderful experience, so they would say “you’ve already seen her before” 🤦‍♀️

I listened to the radio everywhere I drove (on my licence by myself now btw guys yay) and at home when I was studying. The competition was “Swiftie or 50”. One afternoon I rang like a million times and I GOT THROUGH. The competition was choosing between tickets to the 1989 World Tour or going in the draw for $50,000. And as I’m sure you fellow swifties can relate, I was not being convinced on anything other than the tickets. They played all these promo snippets of things you could do with the money but I was like “no I’m still going to take the tickets” HAHA. My heart rate was through the roof but I GOT THEM AND RAN AROUND THE HOUSE SCREAMING IN EXCITEMENT!! 😁😁 I took mum with me to the tour again since a love of Taylor and her music was something we continued to share. I bought a T-shirt and the concert program again. I wore and still wear this t-shirt to death! Lol

In 2017 I moved to Melbourne on my own to pursue a degree in osteopathy. I had roommates for the first time in my life and wasn’t sure what they would think of my love for Taylor. But thankfully they embrace it and one of them came along the ride that was Reputation era. Well the release of LWYMMD and everything leading up to the album. We lost our minds (well I did) at the mv for LWYMMD when we put it on the big tv in the lounge room haha. I took my cousin Lauren to the Reputation Stadium Tour tour with me. We saw Taylor in Melbourne and Lauren travelled down and we made a girls weekend out of it. This was the first concert I dressed up for and I freaking loved it. Although we got some looks and questions on the train to the city HAHA!

We had an absolutely amazing time together, memories neither of us will forget, probably my favourite tour so far!! It was also cool to see Charli XCX together again because we saw her in Sydney one time together. Oh and we we’re old enough to have a drink or two 😉🥂

That brings me to Lover, at 23 years old and having been with my boyfriend for nearly 7 years. He’s fully aware of my love for Taylor and her music. He was visiting (we are doing this relationship long distance whilst I study in Melbourne) when Me! came out. We were driving somewhere and I got the vid up on YT and listened and watched with my phone connected by Bluetooth to the car while he drive us around. Since then he’s been learning the Taylor songs quicker and messages me when he hears it a thousand times on the radio at work lol. YNTCD shook me in the best way possible, I love every bit of it! Lover (the song) came out and touched me immediately. I can truly relate to the love it conveys and it makes me feel so so nice, I think of my boyfriend all the time, and often when listening to Taylor songs hehe. Lover might even be my favourite track on the album because of these lovey feelings it gives me, and that’s saying something because I struggle to choose favourites. I really really love(r) all of Taylor’s songs!!

Okay if you’re still here, freaking well done and I appreciate you so much! Soz it’s a bit, okay a lot, long!! If you wanna help @taylorswift possibly see this that would be pretty amazing! 💕💕💕

Love, Tara

#my swiftie story #australian swiftie #swiftie story #me!#lover #lover era #taylor swift

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thepatricktreestump · 5 years ago

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pride month asks!

some questions and answers about my experience with LGBTQ+

1. What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?

I identify as bisexual and genderfluid, so my pronouns regularly change from she/her to he/him.

2. How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?

I have always been a huge ally to the LGBTQ+ community, but one day I was stepping out of the shower, and kind of thinking to myself what the difference between having sex with a guy and having sex with a girl was. After contemplation, I thought to myself that they really weren’t all that different to me, and I’d probably enjoy having sex with a girl just as much as having sex with a guy. I researched online a little bit, and I figured out that yeah, I’m probably bi. Especially after I fell in love with both Brendon Urie and his wife Sarah, I was pretty damn sure I was bi.

3. Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?

Sometimes I do, but it honestly doesn’t bother me too much because I come from a very conservative, religious, small town background. I grew up in a private Catholic school where everyone is Republican and nobody even knows what being gay is, much less a different gender. So I’m kind of used to putting up a façade for others. As I graduated and moved away from my hometown, things have been much better, and by politely correcting others, I’m able to be confident in who I am as well as educate the people around me.

4. Who was the first person you told, how did they react?

Oh god, haha. I distinctly remember that night when I knew I was going to tell my best friend I was genderfluid. I was so nervous and scared, I just sort of blurted it out over text, in all caps, like “I’M GENDERFLUID” and then I kind of panicked, so I proceeded to send her about a hundred Hamilton gifs to cover up what I had typed out and sent. Although it was awkward in the moment, we both laugh about it to this day, and she’s been so accepting and kind to me ever since that moment.

5. Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?

For my friends, it was a lot of anxiety and doubt. For my parents, fear and chaos. My friends didn’t understand, they thought it was a disease of some sort, and actually a lot of them stopped talking to me. Again, conservative religious background, but still, no excuse. I grew up in a very abusive household, and it wasn’t my choice to come out. My therapist had forced me to tell my parents in a session and it was an absolute mess. Coming out wasn’t the best experience, especially as a freshman in high school.

6. If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?

I kind of explained above, but basically not so well. My dad went absolutely off on me, and said some of the most horrible things I have ever been told in my life. He said that I was dragging everyone I knew towards hell, that what I was is unmoral, unnatural, and unnormal, acted like I was some sort of monster, said it was extremely difficult to even be related to me, and that I was corrupting his family and disrespecting his household. It was a miserable time for me, but through music, I was able to write a song about it that helped me cope.

7. What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?

A lot of people assume that because I’m bisexual, I’m some sort of fetish they can use to fulfill their dirty fantasies. I’m always asked to be a part of a couple’s threesome. I am told that the only reason I’m bi is because I want double the opportunities to have sex. It’s ridiculous and disgusting. I’m bi because I like people. Not because I like sex.

8. Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.

I really fucking love beanies! Most of the time I read that’s the essential clothing item for all genderfluid people, which makes me laugh, because it’s true. Combat boots or converse, black jeans, a band t-shirt, a sports bra or binder, a jean jacket, and a beanie is always my go-to outfit. So much so, to the point my sister told me that every time I go out in public I’m always wearing the same thing, which kind of makes me laugh.

9. Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?

I don’t know if you’ve ever read the magna, Tamen de Gushi, but I absolutely love it! That lesbian couple is everything! I also really love Shane Dawson and Ryland Adams, of course. Captain Holt from Brooklyn Nine Nine and his husband is amazing. Elijah Daniels and Sam also make me super fucking happy.

10. What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

Growing up as a theater kid, I’ve always seen makeup as accentuated and over the top. I only ever wore makeup on stage, and even then, it was special effects type stuff, zombies and clowns and shit. Once I hit puberty though, my mom would force me to wear makeup because she said it would make me beautiful. I hated it. She would force me to put on makeup before I left the door and it made me have horrible self image issues. As I grew older, I found a love for makeup through beauty gurus and drag queens, and I sometimes dabble in it either for fun or for special events like prom or fancy dinners. I always prefer no makeup though, I feel like to me, wearing it is just hiding behind a mask.

11. Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?

ALL THE GODDAMN FUCKING TIME. Since I’ve gotten my haircut, a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. Wearing a binder also helps so much! However, I still really want to start T and I think that will help a lot. Dysphoria affects me in so many ways, whether my self confidence or my body image, my anxiety and my mood, etc., a lot of it depends on how comfortable I am in my own skin.

12. What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?

Homophobic people are probably the stupidest people I’ve ever met in my life, to be honest. I’ve heard thousands of dumb things come from their mouths. I think the most outrageous myth I’ve heard is probably that being gay is a disease, and that simply being around another gay person will make you gay. Like who the fuck comes up with this shit? Smh.

13. What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

How creative we are. We’re resilient and outspoken and passionate, but most of all, so talented. The queer community is full of inventors, politicians, emperors, artists, directors, actors, musicians, and more. It’s gorgeous just how much we are capable of.

14. What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

The discrimination breaks my heart. The fact that we are terrified to so much as hold hands with the one we love in public. To be beaten, tortured, and killed simply for who we are. That is what hurts me the most.

15. Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?

No, I find it sort of ironic every time there is a pride event I happen to have a concert on that day. Once, a Panic! concert, which honestly is sort of the equivalent of Pride. We went and there were so many LGTBQ+ flags and people and it was so gorgeous. I have attended pride prom once though, and it was probably the most fun I had ever had in a really long time.

16. Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?

I absolutely adore Miles McKenna. He has helped me so much in finding myself and accepting who I am. He’s such a huge spokesperson for the community and I am so grateful to have him in my life.

17. Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

I’ve been in several relationships, surprisingly, through parties and discussions and friends. My s.o. right now I met through high school, which was crazy in itself, but we’ve been dating for almost two years now and I love them to death.

18. What is your favourite lgbt+ book?

Beautiful Music for Ugly Children is one of my favorite books ever and it’s about being FTM trans and I love it so much wow.

19. Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?

So very much. After coming out to one of my best friends, she stared at me, disgusted and went “well don’t try to have sex with me or anything” and then proceeded to never talk to me again. I’ve received dirty looks and glares, been misgendered on purpose, and even received death threats. It’s horrible.

20. Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?

I love American Horror Story so much because of just how much representation it gives our community and how natural they make it seem! And of course, “Love, Simon” was an amazing movie that made me cry like a baby.

21. Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?

I don’t really know about bloggers, but definitely Youtubers! Shane Dawson, Miles Chronicles, Thomas Sanders, Ally Hills, Anthony Amorim, Elijah Daniels, Elle Mills, Garrett Watts, Sam Collins, Todrick Hall, and Trevor Moran are a couple of my favorites.

22. Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?

I don’t think queer should be a slur. I think queer is a form of self expression and an umbrella term for the community, and I believe many other LGBTQ+ members agree. It’s a word that we take great pride in rather than shame or discrimination.

23. Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?

No, but god I would love to.

24. How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?

For me, it’s simply just a part of who I am. Just like the weather, my gender simply changes and I adapt to it. It makes me comfortable in my own skin and proud of who I am. I wouldn’t change being genderfluid for the world.

25. Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?

I fucking hate the idea of pushing a human being out of my vagina, and I would probably want anything else in the entire world other than giving birth. Being pregnant for nine months sounds absolutely miserable and dysphoric, and I cannot even imagine going through labor. However, I would like to have kids, just simply through foster care or adoption, never like my own biological children. There are more than enough kids who need good homes who already exist and I’m more than happy to give it to them.

26. What identity advice would you give your younger self?

You aren’t alone and there are so many people just like you. Your parents do not own you and cannot tell you who you are supposed to be. You are you.

27. What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

Gender roles are complete bullshit. Let a guy be a stay at home dad. Let a woman be the working one. Everyone should have responsibilities regardless of their gender. If there’s dirty dishes, do the fucking dishes, don’t wait for your spouse to get home to do them. It’s absolutely ridiculous, really. Just do your part in the relationship.

28. Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?

It breaks my heart how much pain and suffering one has to go through just to be themselves, especially for women and trans people. It’s horrible.

29. What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?

It’s natural! It’s comfortable! And it’s normal! Being oneself is just part of life, there’s no need to have shame or guilt about it. Respect someone the way you wish you would be accepted and loved.

30. Why are proud to be lgbt+?

We have worked so fucking hard to be recognized for who we are. There’s still so much we need to do though, and we aren’t ever going to stop until every single one of our siblings gain the love and respect they deserve.

#pride month #lgbtq+#genderfluid #bisexual #genderfluidity #bisexuality #bi asks #genderfluid asks #pride asks #happy pride month

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